#like this shit really writes itself

[brookheimer]

i feel very mixed on shiv's ending, particularly her choice to return to tom -- i think it makes sense from a thematic/character arc perspective and is a powerful yet devastating indictment of both shiv and the world that created her as well as showing that the cycle of abuse will always continue to cycle, that shiv will become her mother etc, but i also think it does not make sense from a character/internal logic perspective. it's a choice that makes sense from the writers, but not from shiv, not yet. it could've been a brilliant ending to her character, but is tainted for me by the less-than-ideal execution of it, which felt very rushed, making shiv's final submission to tom feel forced by the show rather than forced by the situation or honest to her character. the ending is not inherently misogynistic from the writers' side as i've seen some criticisms claim (it is a dark but real portrayal of misogyny within capitalist society and how it's internalized within the white women who end up at the hips of the CEOs who run it), but i do understand how it could feel that way. the show fails at building up to (and thus convincing us) that the version of shiv we currently know would so immediately subject herself to her mother's fate, so instead of it feeling like shiv's hand was forced by patriarchy to place herself into her worst nightmare, it instead feels like the show itself was the thing that forced shiv to take that route, which does leave a sour taste in the mouth. it doesn't feel like the result of a choice shiv would make or the impact of patriarchal society bearing down, it just feels rushed and thus wrong. shiv would've benefitted immensely from a few more episodes or even just a few scenes dedicated to teasing out her newfound willingness to subject herself to immense disrespect in order to remain close to power, but given that her entire character has always been defined by her inability to do just that unless forced to (which i don't think she was in this situation as she could've easily not waited in the car for tom, not put her hand in his, but she did), her return to tom feels hard to comprehend, and her near immediate submission to him hard to stomach.

(read more under the cut because jesus christ did this get long)

in my mind, at least, i've always understood shiv as being respect-driven rather than power-driven -- she wants power, yes, but more than anything she wants to be taken seriously and respected and seen as a legitimate player, and time and time again we've seen her blow up situations that would've been very advantageous long-term because she felt disrespected and needed to speak up and force people to take her seriously (which, ironically, typically results in the opposite). shiv's overarching goal is power, but her immediate necessity is always respect. her dignity is her number one priority at any given moment, even when it shouldn't be, even when it stops her from attaining the success and power she wants. i can kind of understand shiv going against kendall because of this -- she's always had a very, very narrow lens whenever she feels like she's being disrespected, and even though it is infinitely more humiliating for your (somewhat ex) husband to betray you and boot you out of the CEO position behind your back at the behest of your supposed closest ally (and for you to still vote for them after that!!!) than it is for you to magnanimously allow your brother to be CEO (which would publicly be seen as a choice, as telly etc said - sibs need to stand united behind one chosen CEO - rather than shiv being out of the loop and fucked to infinity), the narrowness of her vision upon seeing kendall about to win makes it impossible for her to think about that legitimately. it's not just jealousy, it's indignity: shiv feels she earned CEO through her machinations with mattson and feels genuinely sick seeing the loganified kendall grinning at the head of the table, hearing his "that's fucking right" and witnessing his cocky entitlement to the job that belonged to her. so, she does what she always does when she feels disrespected, when she feels her dignity is at stake, and impulsively blows everything to fuck, including her own best interests. that makes sense for shiv, at least somewhat -- i still think that as much as she wouldn't want ken as CEO she'd feel like at least w that outcome she'd be seen as a player and a deciding factor, whereas with mattson/tom she'd be viewed as a pathetic fucked-over nothing woman pawn etc (a situation of unparalleled indignity imo), but i can rationalize her choice to go against ken anyways as being part of the narrowed field of vision she always gets upon feeling disrespected by men in her life that makes it impossible for her to think strategically (and i guess even though the disrespect was greater and more humiliating from tom/mattson than ken, ken was the most recent most present and most lifelong source so that's all she could focus on; seeing him like logan was too much to bear). it's hard to imagine shiv publicly throwing her vote behind two men who publicly fucked her as humiliatingly as mattson and tom just did, even if the other option is kendall, but i think that's part of it -- it's fundamentally illogical, even from her disrespect-lens, because there's just something about kendall specifically being in charge that she's never been able to stomach. it's visceral and impulsive. it's not meant to make "sense." it's just what she feels she has to do to preserve her own dignity, even though it works directly against those same interests realistically. it wasn't executed very well, making it hard to entirely buy it given just how publicly humiliating the alternative is, but it can still be chalked up to her historically one-track-mind when it comes to indignity by the hands of kendall in particular. it's a last-ditch attempt for shiv to at least feel like she's maintaining her dignity, her self-respect, as counterintuitive as it actually is. it makes sense. i can stomach it.

again, shiv's fatal flaw (in logan's eyes and aside from her original sin of being a woman) has always, always been her inability to shut up and make the smart move in situations where she feels she's being disrespected or not taken seriously. if shiv stayed quiet during that dinner with the pierces, maybe she would've been logan's CEO, but no, she couldn't stop herself, she needed to feel she was being taken seriously, she burst out 'cmon, dad, just tell them it's going to be me.' she is unable to play it smart, to keep quiet, to win when winning means perceived disrespect. she's allergic to it. even on a personal level, she shoots herself in the foot constantly because of this: she is unable to let herself have the things she wants because she can't put herself in positions that open her up to disrespect and perceived inferiority. she can't be vulnerable because she needs to be respected. tom asks her if he could 'try to make love to her' in episode one of this season, and even though she clearly wants to, she says 'no, i don't think so, tom.' tom tells her he 'wants her, wants this' back in episode six, and even though she clearly wants that too, she draws back and says 'well then you shouldn't have betrayed me.' shiv is fundamentally incapable of allowing herself to remain in possibly advantageous situations when she feels at risk of being seen as lesser, of being disrespected, of being perceived as weak. that is her response to patriarchy. when patriarchal forces bear down, shiv is unable to grin and bare it -- she has a short fuse, a sharp tongue, and an inability to entertain even a second of being treated like The Woman, of being looked down upon, especially when it's for her gender. it's the one thing she cannot do, cannot let herself do, and it's why she fails to "win" over and over and over again. she shoots herself in the foot the second her patriarchy disrespect sensors tingle. she makes the wrong choice, the dumb choice, the one that makes her feel like she stood up for herself in the moment but ends up leaving her powerless and helpless in the end. that's the only explanation for why she chose to vote against kendall (the clearly better option for her long-term as she'd 1) be respected as part of the decision, as someone who helped choose the CEO rather than a Woman who got fucked over and had the door slammed in her face by her husband and close ally simply because she possessed a womb, and 2) probably be head of ATN or some other area of waystar, she'd have actual power within the company and be respected as a legitimate source of power rather than the CEO-to-be made CEO's humiliated wife -- if she was capable of making the smart, selfish choice in terms of power instead of having a hair-trigger reaction to gendered disrespect and cocky male superiority, she would have voted kendall. but she is not capable of doing that. she never has been. so she voted tom and mattson.

so what i still cannot for the life of me understand is what would compel this shiv, the one who cannot stomach indignity even when power's on the line, to immediately return to tom's side the second he beckons her, which is like five minutes after he becomes CEO (the job she was promised) by mattson (who gave it to tom instead of shiv because 'why get the baby lady if i can get the man who put the baby inside her?'). it makes perfect, cruel, devastating sense from a show perspective, and that's what most people are talking about, understandably. it's a devastating yet unavoidable, inevitable outcome. she's left with no other choice once she makes the decision against kendall, and patriarchy compels her to play the good wife to stay close to power. except, like... she does still have a choice. she does not have to go back to tom's car. she does not have to sit patiently waiting for him. she does not have to quietly congratulate him on his victory. she does not have to place her hand in his. these are all choices she made very voluntary. they're choices between maintaining her dignity and self-respect at the cost of future power versus maintaining the potential for future power at the cost of her dignity and self-respect -- the classic siobhan roy conundrum. she's been faced with it time and time again (even just five minutes prior with kendall) and she has never, not once, chosen the latter of her own volition. she hasn't been able to. that's her fatal flaw. maybe i could stomach her going back to tom if she didn't congratulate him, didn't place her hand in his when he expectantly held his out -- then some dignity would be preserved, maybe. but her complete and total submission for the sake of future power does not make sense with her lifelong inability to do just that. it makes sense that this would be her eventual endpoint, but we have seen nothing that implies shiv would so willingly subject herself to this feminine submission of wife and mother before person or source of power, to the complete and utter humiliation of being the quiet wife at the side of the man who knifed her in the back (and notably handed said knife by the man she thought her closest ally) in order to steal the job she fought for her entire life and, in her opinion, had earned. maybe she would come back to him eventually, for love or (more likely) for power, but it is incredibly hard to believe that shiv 'impulsive when faced with indignity' roy would be capable of immediately and publicly playing the role of the good wife after such intense and public humiliation at the hands of her husband.

really, the way i feel about the shiv ending is similar to how i feel about the daenerys ending -- unlike most people, i really wasn't that against the daenerys outcome. i thought it made a lot of sense and was interesting, devastating, and fascinating. i thought there had been a few signs all along and that that ending for her would make sense and be far more interesting than a Hooray ! Girlboss ! ending. however, it was poorly executed -- it was rushed. it did not make sense from where daenerys was at that point in the text. it could've worked, it could've worked brilliantly, but it needed more time to build and fester in order for her ultimate turn to feel earned rather than forced for the sake of the point the writers wanted to make. that's kind of how i feel about shiv. i get the ending and i don't think it's inherently bad or misogynistic or anything, but it feels like the writers saw the possibility for a shiv 'mommed' ending and immediately took it, with little regard to what actually made sense for shiv herself to do in that moment. outcome > character. that's frustrating for me particularly for succession because my like number one reason for adoring succession as much as i do is their consistent refusal to operate the way most media does (using the characters as instruments to achieve the plot/outcome the writers want), instead prioritizing following the characters themselves in a way that feels honest and real. it's character-driven, not plot or ending driven. i think that this fell by the wayside a few times in the latter half of this season simply because there was so much that needed to happen in such a short space of time (especially during the finale), but in my opinion, at least, the most egregious case is shiv. given more time, more development, more build-up, the last shot of her hand in tom's would've struck the chord the writers wanted it to -- and for some people, it did anyways! but for me, it rang out and fell nauseatingly flat. it felt hollow and wrong and unearned. shiv could end up becoming her mother, that feels entirely possible, but not in this particular sense, not yet. in what world would siobhan roy willingly choose to be seen as nothing more than a woman hanging off her husband's arm, especially when said husband had publicly humiliated her and ruined her entire life just five minutes prior? when, just five (metaphorical) minutes prior, she was the one poised to be CEO and everyone knew it? when now everyone will see her on tom's arm and whisper and gawk? she has become her worst fear, yes, but unlike kendall, it does not feel earned. it does not feel like she has actually become her worst fear. it feels like the show forced her to. not patriarchy or the situation or her own desire for power, but the show itself. that's what feels so shitty.

i wouldn't necessarily call the writing misogynistic as a result of this, as it's less a flaw of misogyny and more a flaw of bad, rushed writing that could happen to any character. it's the same as with daenerys -- although (somewhat unlike succession) there were many, many aspects of GoT's writing that were deeply misogynistic, especially in the last season (just look at fucking brienne), the core issue with the daenerys plotline is not one of misogyny but of time. they did not give daenerys the time needed to become the version of herself seen burning down the city. that could've easily been a focus of previous episodes, but it wasn't. they simply did not develop her enough for that turn to make sense yet. it could make sense, hypothetically, at some point down the line, but at that point it felt sudden, off-putting, and wrong. shiv could easily become her mother. that's been made evident especially regarding her relationship to pregnancy/children, love, and vulnerability (or the lack thereof). but for this ending to make sense, we would have needed to see signs of shiv imitating her mother's willingness to be relegated to the sidelines, to bring out the food while the men eat and make deals, in order to remain tangential to power. that is a concession shiv roy had never been willing to make prior to the last five minutes of the entire show. other signs of shiv imitating caroline or falling prey to patriarchal norms throughout the show are not enough to undo shiv's fundamental refusal to weather gender-related indignity even when doing so would benefit her. in my opinion, that's why the final five minutes of shiv's plotline were so unsatisfying.

shiv could become her mother, and her ending could be a devastating portrayal of the inability for even rich white women to escape their original sin of being a woman in a man's world, as well as a dark, ironic criticism of both women like shiv and the patriarchal world that breeds them into existence. but because the show did not develop shiv in this particular direction and because her entire character thus far has been defined by her self-destructive insistence on being respected at all costs, shiv's ending did not land the way it could've, or should've.

#WOOF okay this was long. not even gonna read it over bc if i do i'll never stop editing to it or adding to it and god knows no one needs tht #so if it's shit well. forgive me #but yeah this is just my take. i felt really unhappy w shiv's ending but didn't quite know why because the ending itself i can imagine bein #fine with but really i just feel very frustrated by the show writing over any agency she would normally have had in order to make their #point by the time the episode ended #honestly the more i think about it the more i feel this season should've had more episodes -- i think another season after this one would b #GREAT for me personally obviously but unnecessary for the show itself and possibly too much of a good thing #but at the same time the latter half of this season could really have benefitted from a little wiggle room and space to develop #so it wasn't just Sudden Mattson Likes Tom or Wait Did Mencken Disappear or Remember Roman's Sexuality or SHIV FUCKING SHIIIIV lolllll #ok. this is too long. post #succession #succession spoilers #long post #and i mean LONG #should i do a read more? i never know what the like courtesy is lmao #well . yall asked for it so here u go #shiv roy #succession meta #i guess #edit i did a read more this is disgusting LOLOL #100 #casey shut the fuck up about shiv roy

[b4kuch1n]

ough brain is doing SO bad but sometimes. there are colors

#bakuspeech #WIP #cw: gore #the stuffed animal cartoon kind. but still #ask to tag #Im so fucking sorry I keep going like I will draw! (does not draw for three weeks #I. ngl Somethin is goin on up there. I finished writing a Thing and it doesnt solve that #I just. this is my capacitance really I think. I just gotta. accept it. work with it #its always so funny tho bc like I look at whatever it is Im drawing rn and its like hey this looks like shit! this looks ass #and then I keep drawing it. #like this piece is at Least two weeks into something thats supposed to be a pretty quick revised illus for #an old wizard leon design. and like if I werent Bit Off it wouldve stayed that way #instead. this is how its goin #I have not slept for 23 hours. I should uh. fix that #but yeah its just. my brain is wrappin itself around some new ideas n concepts n shit rn #like. I was really afraid I wouldnt be able to paint digitally if Im not on the screen tablet #and its kinda fuckin with me? like obviously I can. I am literally doing the exact same things Im doing on the screen tablet #but now on a graphic tablet #thats just. not getting thru to my brain yet. for some reason. its still generating goo n such #well! what is a guy to do. if not blastin off regardless #sorry. I really should sleep now #have a good night lads! this piece will be done when its done. I am NOT saying more I am not jinxing SHIT #u should change ur pillowcases! it really does send u to another realm

[cometrose]

"Silk Flowers grow in pairs on small red bushes"

Other archon having twins

Zhobgli is suspicious

(Plus the god of eternity saying his story is not yet over)

“~twin where have you been~”

it’s still pretty interesting that Zhongli doesn’t have a ‘twin’

it is very clear one of the main themes of genshin is family especially between that of siblings (twins)

the traveler is the twin and all of the archons -the main characters of their respective regions have “twins”.

Venti has the nameless bard, Ei and Makoto, Nahida and Rukkhadevata, Furina and Focalors. These are characters that look identical but live very different lives.

A core part of each archon is their relationship with their respective twin. Ei struggled to move on after Makoto died, Rukkha was everything Nahida dreamed of being, Focalors made Furina play a part for 500 years. I am unsure of the dynamic of Venti and his bard but it’s pretty easy to assume he gave his life great meaning and considering he looks just like him he never could move or wanted to forget what he looked like.

So the fact Zhongli doesn’t have anybody with that kind of connection is really odd lol. I've complained so many times like “Zhongli!! where is your silly clone!” and he refuses to answer my calls. Rex Lapis is represented by silk flowers but they grow in pairs but where is Rex Lapis’ pair? Where is the moon to his beautiful sun???

Some people argue a more metaphorical twin for Zhongli is Rex Lapis/the Exuvia. The point of the Liyue archon quest was Zhongli stepping down from a role he has had for thousands of years and considering the way he talks about Rex Lapis/geo archon (he always refers to him in third person) I believe Zhongli sees him as a separate person entirely. So losing Rex Lapis was like losing his twin. Casting his exuvia aka body double on a crowd of people and burying Rex Lapis was Zhongli’s conclusion with his “twin”. He ended his reign and made peace with his life.

But at the same time I feel that interpretation is so ehhhh. Like all of the twins we’ve seen were their own person with their own thoughts and feelings. Like yeah furina and focalors were once the same person but that was no longer the case when focalors brought out the scissors and said act woman.

Let’s get venti and zhongli out of the way cause they are a little weird from the rest of the seven but we’ve never met “Rex Lapis” and then he doesn’t have a human form like the rest of them. We have talked or at least heard the voices of the “other twin” . We met rukkha, we heard makoto and neuvi let us see focalors.

A big part of the archons is their relationship with their other half but Zhongli’s stories most always focus on someone else-a different god a different entity there is just so little of what we know about him comes from his own mouth.

Besides when you look at the visual symbolism then all the archons are represented by the moon and shadows. They live in the shadows of the "twin" if almost haunted by them. They cannot live up to their glory or they are forced to be someone they are not. These 'twins' are the reason for our archon's (hell even the traveler's) existence and journey, it is why they continue forward until they eventually find new meaning in life.

However Morax is always represented by the sun and light, and you could argue that Zhongli is the moon to Rex Lapis’ sun but if you look as his symbols -his golden eyes, the golden light he uses to save xiao and his interactions with the people of Liyue he still holds that warmth.

Next the big revelation for Zhongli was his relationship with Liyue itself, not himself. We could argue that the existence of "Rex Lapis, The Geo Archon" was intertwined with that relationship but Zhongli's narrative is stepping down and taking his hands off Liyue not any personal struggle. If Liyue had failed his test he would've remained the geo archon for the foreseeable future.

That means, Liyue itself is more of his twin, it is something that plays a huge role in his identity and leaving it behind and moving forward is the core of his arc. It is Liyue that made Zhongli play the part of the geo archon, it is Liyue that made him turn on friend or foe if they were are threat, Liyue and its people are the motivation for everything Rex Lapis did. Morax’s love for his people defined every action that he did as the geo archon.

Long story short ehh if push comes to shove I can accept Zhongli's dragon clone as his twin but I would also argue against it because it doesn’t hold thematic weight that the other twins do!

In the end, we can still safely assume that zhongli’s twin has gone awol but then who are they!!! Each archon has a pair that is meant to parallel the relationship between our travelers Aether and Lumine but where is such a twin???

I've talked so much about Zhongli about everything but Ei mentions in her voice lines that she believes his story isn't anywhere finished. She even talks about him in Zhongli's teaser way back in 2020, "in his long life he has met countless people and shall meet countless more still. As they say: waters change course but mountains move not". Its kind of neat the god of eternity says your story isn't over

I may be a delusional zhongli stan but I don't think it is farfetched to say he is veryyy suspicious. We don't know his true form, we don't know the truth of his contracts, we don't know if he's hiding a twin, and the goddess of eternity herself believes his journey will continue forward.

Could he be missing a twin because he's not from Teyvat? What if he lost his counterpart a long time ago? What if we have simply not met Zhongli's twin and the two of them are separated from each other much like the traveler? I always believed Zhongli kind of crashed into Teyvat like a meteor or shooting star and that's why he's kind of weird but it could be possible that Zhongli's counterpart is just not here either long dead or with a different destiny.

Fun fact to add to Zhongli’s weirdness; Did you know Zhongli and Neuvillette are the only playable characters whose constellations are different from their character quest? Zhongli's constellation is Lapis Dei but his story quest is Historia Antiqua, much like Neuvillette's constellation is Leviathan Judicator but his story quest is called Diluvies. Which is weird cause Venti has the same constellation as Zhongli (Carmen Dei) but Venti's quests line up. Like is it a dragon thing but why?

Then most of the original archons croaked during the cataclysm and Venti went into a coma. How did Zhongli get out of the damn thing unscathed? Why didn't he lose his twin or die and shit?

I know in my soul Zhongli is hiding the secrets of the world in that pretty little head of his. He's just a bum and refuses to share it with the crowd.

#zhongli #archons #genshin impact #noooo #this is too long again #this was definetly a yap session #but like really though where is his twin! #where is zhongli 2 #like ive seen so many people at least on twitter say zhongli's twin is his exuvia and like *shrug* SURE I GUESS #but its still so different from the others UNLESS you count the exuvia as Liyue itself which is rather metaphorical then the physical twin #speaking of which what the fuck is the god of contracts #freedom eternity wisdom justice war and love are all common abstract concepts and normal things for gods to be #what the hell is contracts like if it were truth or power or even promise that would make sense #but contracts are not nearly as abstract as the rest of them fuckers #maybe if it were relationships instead of contracts but that sounds rather romantic doesn't it? #me writing this: uhh where do i put a page break this time #long story short he's weird!!! #zhongli is super weird!!! #why is all his fucking shit cubes! #also if we consider zhongli and exuvia a twin what fucking parallel is that to traveler UNLESS you look at it as the final stage #and you know during the lantern rite event paimon writes a little blurb about the regions and is like we've been through the land of winds #and for liyue it is the final destination of a star SEE HOW i can connect this back to star!zhongli but also the traveler is a star #maybe the end of the traveler's journey is letting go of their twin like zhongli let go of liyue

[bunnakit]

so I promised @sparklyeyedhimbo that when bake me please is over I'll write an omegaverse fic for it and this is me putting that agreement into the universe so you can all hold me accountable

#really i wont have to do much #shit writes itself at this point #boys keep smelling each other #is making peach smell like peach cobbler too on the nose

[citnamora]

You ever have those two characters where the thought of them dating makes you sick to your stomach and the idea of them getting married turns you off completely from enjoying the media they're in? Because I do.

#sad aro shit #aromantic #romance repulsed #aros in fandom #fandom problems #I'm keeping the characters to myself so I don't accidentally poke the bear/s. the ship is by far the most popular one #but yeah the writing for them is suuuuuch an ick for me. I hate that they're canon and I miss when they were just besties #it doesn't help one of them got reduced to a lovesick idiot and the other showed like 0 interest up until midways through the 2nd movie #and it stinks because I really REALLY enjoy the franchise but it's hard to engage in the fandom when *so much* is centered around the ship #so in a way I'm kind of. falling out of love for it. and I wish I wasn't because I found so much enjoyment #and now it just feels like any other fandom where it's all about SHIP SHIP SHIP and ugh. I just. wish I didn't feel so alone in it #it also doesn't help that they namedropped the ship itself (HRRRK) and post about it alllll the time on social media

[p4nishers]

can we actually take a moment and remember swan upon leda? can we actually shut the fuck up and sit the fuck down and think about our lord and savior swan upon leda because i'm tired of doing it alone every single day guys

#the title itself!!! THE FUCKING TITLE #swan UPON leda #god he's an actual genius THANK U HOZIER SO FUCKING MUCH #i hate how that myth is portrayed and received and objectified bc they make it out to be such a funny little chuckle story like 'hahaha led #is SO easy that she fell for a swan isn't that actually the funniest thing you've ever heard omg like women are literally so easy to please #whatever whatever blahblahblah yes that's fucking hilarious matthew thank u SO much for that absolutely fascinating commentary on a women #getting raped by a god really truly an amazing insight into ur pea fucking brain #like fuck sorry but i just absolutely despises how this myth is made out to be and i remember learning abt it in class and being literally #nauseated bc guess fucking what it's literally not hard to understand wtf is happening and while u r laughing away about i repeat a WOMEN #getting RAPED some fucking of us have brain enough to be mortified #jesus ANYWAY #hozier dropped that song after roe v wade was over turned and i just i love him so fucking much he cares SO MUCH and before anything else #he's an activist and he actually gives a shit about women's rights and he dropped this song as a comfort as something to hold onto but also #as a social commentary and he linked charities and resources to help women and keep them safe and this song just means everything to me #bc greek mythology often gets reduced to children stories bc most ppl know myths from children books and obviously a book for kids not gonn #outloud say the word rape or even imply that that's what's happening and that's fine ig but bc so many ppl know it from there it gets #reduces to a joke and a raped women gets ridiculed but hozier actually took one of the few poems about leda being raped and it being a rape #at all and made it into a song during a time that was so traumatizing for ever afab person in the world basically and it just says 'i see #you i see what you're going through and i'm listening and i actually care and i want to help you' and he's helping by writing a song yes bc #he's spreading the word that way bc that's how movements are spread and people listen to him when he's singing and that's how he helps and #i did i mention that i love him? bc i'd actually do anything for him and to meet him and tell him how much he fucking means to me #the line that always gets me is 'a crying CHILD pushes a CHILD into the night' bc yes she was a fucking child who had to deliver 4 KIDS BC #AN ASSHOLE DECIDED SHE WAS PRETTY ENOUGH TO FUCK and nobody ever cares that she was just a child and her child helen was just a child when #she was abducted and raped and impregnated (JUST LIKE HER MOTHER) by theseus a supposed great hero and im genuinely sick she was just a #child like so many women or girls in greek mythology and ik it was a different time back then or wtv but they were just GIRLS and nobody #cared about that or cares now. but this song does. #bc of course it does it's hozier. #hozier #swan upon leda

[basilpaste]

ill sometimes rotate isat slay the princess au in my brain. ill never do anything with it. but. imagine.

#basil blabbers #sif as the princess works in the sense of 'untethered identity trying to make something of itself' #but the mound is change so theoretically isa or mira would suit the princess role better? #in the same breath sif as the long quiet works too??? loop narrator in that case..... #i also like isa as the quiet. and i think sif has enough Shit happening that theyd be a good princess. #change god narrator? eh. they ddont. really suit that role??? but if you write the narrator different then. maybe. #because i dont know whod be a better princess than sif. #weh.

[scopophobia-polaris]

Arn seeing Timie on the street: aw what acute lil guy sure hope he isn't tormented!

Bro absolutely messed up, wanted to be a good boy and help someone because this mirrors shit that happened to him but instead found out that Timie is filled with 10thousand problems and somehow knows Arn to a weird degree withought ever really talking to him and he cant...figure out why..... can you really meet someone in a dream?

And now poor Arnold got a little guy that wants to cling onto him when they're sad

#Arn is gonna be a cuddle buddy if he keeps up with being nice to Timie by accident #Timie is like a hissing kitten in my opion all ready to rip your fingers off until you pet them once and now theyre your best friend please #hold me NYYYYAAAAAAAAAA NYAAAAA #i just think its gonna be funny writing Arn slowly pieceing shit together over time until its jusg oh mf youre the hero of time arent you #no WONDER youre so messed up #but for right now hes just super confused about what just happened he just hugged Timie becaue it seemed like the right thing to do #and now youre bound to this dude by invoking destiny maybe we were supposed to meet again insane ass you just became #inexplicably tied to this dude and you will die all through one thing thats manifested itself as a red string of fate around both of you #congrats arn your kindness has just doomed you down the path that all dudes in Hyrule take when they get to close to the hero #(REDACTED) oh right wait thats massive plot shit thats something i dont wanna reveal #ITS NOT DEATH IT REALLY ISNT I AINT GONNA KILL HIM like forreal i killed arn once never again but its gonna be so silly goofy what his ass #just got tied up in all from just trying to help #maybe you shouldnt of been their canon event in the adult timeline being the one person they couldnt save but fucked up

[lord-squiggletits]

"Rodimus is a better Prime because it didn't hurt for him to bond with the Matrix while for Optimus it did" headcanon/theory my beloathed.

One day I'm literally gonna snap and make a whole post addressing why what's wrong bc I'm tired of the inaccuracy and tired of ppl not understanding the Point TM of IDW and its version of the Matrix/Primacy and even more tired of people putting down Optimus in favor of Rodimus by essentially arguing that being unworthy means you deserve to be punished/put in pain bc you just weren't good enough to hold the Symbol of Ultimate Authority

#it's wrong on so many levels both in terms of lore and as well as like what the general themes of idw1 are #it's just a validation contest using the matrix as some magical symbol to decide who's the most special #which is ironically something that was a plot point in exrid/OP. specifically how stupid of an idea that is ldskjflksd #ppl revealing that they havent read anything besides mtmte/ll as usual #like half the reason ppl think optimus is a bad prime and rodimus is a good prime is literally bc like #optimus was written by an author who was specifically trying to deconstruct him (sometimes to the point of absurdity) #and rodimus was written by an author who takes a more optimistic/idealistic approach. and is also better at writing #but also like am i seriously the only person who thinks that that argument is fucked up????? #like 'OP felt pain which means he's unworthy/not a real prime/not a true leader' #ok so you think that there's a hierarchy of moral goodness in which anyone who falls short of that Moral Ideal should suffer #as a sign of their unworthiness?? like does that not sound dystopian as hell to any of you?? why would you WANT the matrix to work like tha #even if the theory were true (which it isn't) why would you view the matrix as a good authoritative moral judge of character #if its idea of 'moral judgement' is to inflict pain on anyone who's supposedly not truly good/worthy #wasn't the entire point of the ending of LL (including rodimus being a good leader) that everyone is worth it? #like rodimus literally said 'you ARE damn well good enough' or something like that #so what? everyone else in the universe tries their best and that's enough but somehow when OP suffers it's like #a sign that he's not actually a good prime/leader?? we're really going with the punitive perspective purely for One Guy?? #swear to god ppl are projecting their authority issues onto Optimus the way they shit on him for things they would excuse #if any other character did it #Optimus is uniquely deserving of pain/being marked as unworthy bc idk he was a cop once and that offends my delicate sensibilities #what's even funnier is how much harm was inflicted by rodimus as a captain sheerly due to his stupidity or ego but everyone forgives him #i guess bc as long as the matrix likes him that means he's valid no matter what he actually does as a person #WHICH IS SOMETHING IDW ITSELF ARGUED AGAINST BC A LOT OF THE PRIMES THAT WERE CHOSEN BY THE MATRIX #WERE DICKS AND THE FACT THEY COULD WIELD THE MATRIX DIDN'T MAKE THEM GOOD PEOPLE #like oh my god stop using the matrix as an arbiter of moral authority in idw1 it literally goes against the themes of the story #including the themes that are embodied in rodimus himself #idw op love

[kafkaoftherubble]

185.2章：放下？还是压抑？可贺，抑或可悲？

// Chapter 185.2: Detachment v. Repression

This ramble concerns To Your Eternity manga Chapter 185.2. It is edited from a conversation between (yea you guessed it) @bestbonnist and me after the chapter dropped before I had to hastily run off because sorry gotta see shits with my Besto Furrendo! Lisan al-Ghaib! Lisan al-Ghaib!!!

Although this chapter is devoid of hype moments—unlike C184.1 where plenty of us were sent into a frenzy— and good old macabre, this is genuinely one of my favorite chapters to date.

Because it became a really nice philosophical discussion between friends. Sounds a tad cheesy when I say it like that...

(1) Two Different Perspectives on Fushi's Latest State of Mind

Ray expressed dismay that Fushi's coping mechanism seems to gave become even more terrible because they are essentially repressing their emotions. They are telling themself not to feel anything and to be detached. In the Wish Era, Fushi seemed to have become more resigned to their fate, which became starkly apparent when contrasted by the Doll and Andy's loud, outward desire to see Abel live.

That dismal observation actually stunned me—because I happened to see this development in a positive light. What better state of mind should Fushi aspire to attain apropos to their immortality... if not a state of non-attachment? After all, if they don't learn to be so, then the sheer impermanence of life will torment them forever. To me, non-attachment—or in a more English-natural manner of speaking, detachment—is a goal worthy of pursuing, even if it is often fraught with erratic instances such as mistaking "repressing one's emotions" as similar to "being genuinely unperturbed."

----

(2) The Benefits of Attachment

In this story's universe, attachment keeps a person's faie (their soul) around.

Hence, to Ray, Fushi's loss of attachment implies their death (which I agree is a reasonable projection for the end of this story). When they no longer have anything to do—no goal—then it is time for them to move on.

But more than that, there's this other thing Ray is worried about. The manga asked whether Fushi is human, especially in its earlier exploration. Whether they think they are human. Therefore, it's hard to see Fushi's detachment as anything other than dehumanizing themself ("I'm not human so I don't deserve to be attached/feel bad when people I care about die.") It's one step to Fushi's progression into becoming a deity at the expense of their humanity.

This prospect is upsetting because they wanna see Fushi leave as a human being, as someone who dies after living a satisfying life like Yuuki did.

Ray also argued that there's a difference between acceptance and detachment. "Acceptance is acknowledging that something is out of your control and acknowledging that the way you feel about that." To them, Fushi seemed to have acknowledged that something was out of their control, but they hadn't yet acknowledged their feelings toward it.

Then, they conceded that while Fushi was frank about being pained by people leaving, ultimately, the dude seemed deadset on trying to ignore that pain altogether. "Fushi isn't good at being 'above' feeling things!"

I agree with this. Of course, they aren't! One of Fushi's powers is supernatural empathy. They can't ignore the sensation of pain or (occasionally) love in their vicinity even if they try. Feeling shit is what they do, willingly or not. And from an emotional connection like that, one easily forms attachments.

---

(3) The Common Error: Mistaking Detachment with Apathy

Strangely, at that point in our conversation, it became clear that Ray thought Fushi should not be detached because it stops them from accepting death—while I think Fushi should learn to be detached because it helps them to accept death. Same destination, but different ways of assessing detachment as a path.

Now, of course, when I use the term "detachment" or "non-attachment" (preferred), I'm once again drawing it from a Buddhist philosophical perspective. Because dude, it's me, 睿得失。You fucking signed up for this the moment you talk to me, bwaahhahahahaha!

Even Buddhists, born and raised, often make the mistake of conflating "equanimity," which non-attachment encourages, with "apathy."

One of the four sublime qualities (brahmavihārā), equanimity (upekkhā) is the state of being unwavering and unperturbed even in the face of loss and gain [1], good-repute and ill-repute, praise and censure, and sorrow and happiness. Its far enemies—as in, its direct contrasting vices—are greed and resentment. But its near enemy—the quality mendaciously close to equanimity—is apathy.

[1] Just a little aside: this is why I joked that Fushi should take up my self-given Chinese name in our conversation. 睿得失 means "being wise (about one's) gain and loss." The hope of attaining some semblance of upekkha is built into the name already.

Plenty of people think being detached means being uncaring and indifferent, and that it has some elements of dehumanization to it—be it to other people or to yourself. But it's not. Being detached is to keep a balance between concern and coercion. It's expressing compassion while being mindful not to conflate your genuine care with your desire to will things and people to bend to the state or situation you wanted.

Fushi and us mortals could easily realize one fact about life: it is truly impermanent. The desire to impose our will on the universe—as if there is some supernatural feature to our will that can influence things to happen—is a source of agitation. Life doesn't bend to our will; it indifferently stays impermanent even when we demand it to be permanent in some sort of personal bliss.

In Buddhist thought, it's our actions and intentions that impart changes. Our will (and our demanding desires) don't. We'll revisit this in our 5th Chapter later.

In other words! Contrary to Ray's interpretation, I see being detached not as imposing a limit on your compassion but liberating it from constraints. Now that you're detached, your mode of compassion is centered around the situation and people as they are, not as you hope them to be. True compassion asks for nothing in return—not because you suppress your demands, but because you genuinely have none to begin with.

----

(4) Fushi's Laudable Baby Steps

What really made me think that Fushi had grown here was their insistence that whether Abel lives or dies is "his decision to make."

Not Fushi's, despite their god-like powers. Not Doll or Andy, despite their love and attachment to Abel. It's Abel's choice. All Fushi can do is to accept whatever the man says—and that acceptance is only possible if they begin practicing detachment. After all, attachment results in the reactions Doll and Andy expressed.

To me, Fushi is taking a step in the right direction already. This is the kind of wisdom I think an immortal, most of all, should gradually pick up (I also think mortals like us should, too, but that's beside the point).

Here is where I think Ray's criticisms warrant merits in my interpretation: Actually practicing detachment/non-attachment is hard as fuck. I wouldn't deny that though it doesn't make you an apathetic non-human, you're not gonna be very normal-humanlike if you manage to be equanimous either. While learning to be detached, one often takes up a lot of problematic tactics and mistakes it to be detachment.

One such misguided tactic? Suppression of emotions. You force yourself to pretend you're not feeling anything instead of facing them and realizing their falsity while believing you're being detached. So Ray's concerns are completely warranted, because I don't believe Fushi has consummated their learning either. They wouldn't have lied about the massacre if they were really that detached.

Repressing your emotion, as a tactic, is wrong, but it is the hallmark of someone who's trying to get there, especially when you compound it with the philosophy Fushi was articulating. They care. But they are also being clear-eyed about the limits of their demand.

I don't think they seem resigned here. I think they are being wise. Baby steps, and their method is imperfect, but good nonetheless.

----

(5) Yuuki the GOAT and His Biggest W Yet

Fushi grappled with wanting to impose their will to make others live as long as they in the Modern Arc, right? That's one of their biggest and most constant sources of dukkha (dissatisfaction/suffering). But Yuuki's satisfying death and life... actually steered him in the right direction!

Fushi didn't come to earn detachment because of some horrible, tragic death turning them jaded and cynical. They learned because Yuuki's life and death were that fucking good.

Learning philosophy from pain is all well and good. It is usually how people learn it (few would give a fuck about existentialism or Buddhist philosophy or stoicism or what-have-you if they weren't in a personal crisis). But learning philosophy from joy is a whole other thing. Whatever you learned from that instance has no hint of jadedness and cynicism to corrupt your thinking; it's like making a decision when you're at the most optimal state.

This is Yuuki's victory. He influenced and taught Fushi without giving him pain or trauma to live by. He was not some main character of a tragedy despite outwardly looking like a bumbling normie.

Think about it: none of the Immortals who were attached to Fushi, until now, had been capable of influencing and teaching them without accidentally leaving some grief, pain, and trauma!

Why does Fushi take on Yuuki's form so much lately—if not because Yuuki is the only one who managed to teach them without the use of pain or trauma or anything like that?

And as Ray pointed out, Yuuki was the form embodying "Peace." Even his death was offscreen and peaceful. On a bed, unpoisoned and unhurt. Fushi remembers him constantly because he makes them feel at ease.

"It's our actions and intentions that impart changes," that was what I mentioned in Chapter 3 of this long-ass ramble. Here it is exemplified. People inherit the fruits of other people's actions (and you yourself are one of those who will inherit your own actions, too). And well? These are the fruits of Yuuki's actions that Fushi continues to reap even now.

That's how complete Yuuki's W is. He managed to leave just the kind of food for thought for an Immortal that eventually set them up to grasp the kind of wisdom they lacked. Who says the Modern Arc has no lessons?

----

(6) Conclusion, or The Abrupt Ending of a Conversation

As you can tell, I really don't think Fushi's latest development is bad. Bittersweet and a bit of a mixed bag, sure, but I ultimately think it's commendable rather than worrisome. Of course, my ass interpreting things through a Buddhist lens has a lot to do with it, but brutha, this is exactly my niche! You should have seen me talk about non-self vis-a-vis Fushi in a YouTube comment section!

Ray did leave this paragraph that had eluded me because, again, the Muaa'dib was calling me and I really gotta go:

"I have a potential counter-argument for you, which is about how Fushi's ideal person to follow is kind of a mix of Yuuki (as you explained) and Kahaku (bag of mess and you haven't read that part of the present era anyways), which is putting the concept of detachment together with a really selfish kind of selflessness (as we talked about). But I'm not clear on whether that's still there after their fight with the left hand. I feel like it's lingering a little but I haven't seen much evidence for it in the wish era."

Now, I don't really know what that whole bit was like because I didn't actually read all of the Modern Arc—just the latter half. But again, "detachment" and "self-lessness" are complementary and forward-feeding to one another in Buddhist Philosophy, so on this concept alone, I don't see a clash.

I should probably clarify what Ray's "selfish kind of selflessness" meant here, but... I'm kinda tired now. And I've briefly touched on this in my essay about... Gojo Satoru, goddamn it.

Or maybe Ray should explain it themself! I distinctly remember someone owing me like, 3 essays or something. I'm such a kindhearted person I'm willing to give them a discount and accept just one essay for this week, though. Don't squander it, you!

Thank you for reading my ramble.

----

Did you enjoy this? If yes, wouldn't it be really fucking cool if you get to read essays and commentaries like these, alongside fanfic and fanart and other interesting bits, in one place?!

BECAUSE! We are thinking of starting a To Your Eternity zine! It's merely in its Interest Check phase, but you gotta fill this form up so we can see just how many people in our modest little fandom want this! Be a supporter or a contributor, it don't matter at this stage! Support is the currency here!

#Honestly even before I started writing this I wonder if I *should* ahahhah #Yesterday it seemed like a really prime essay material! #Today? Suddenly call its meaningfulness into question ahahhahaha #But man this work deserves a lot more essays than it's actually getting. It's sad that it doesn't even have enough! WE NEED TO REMEDY THIS! #Me trying to fill the void is truly a 蜀中无大将 廖化作先锋 moment. “An underqualified person answering a call because there's no one better.” #or in Jujutsu Kaisen parlance: I'm fucking Kusakabe holy SHIT #AT LEAST I DON'T HAVE TO SAY “Throughout heaven and earth I am alone"........... #.....until I'm attending a convention as a TYE fan #fumetsu no anata e #to your eternity #tye #fushi #fnae #manga spoilers #Wish Era #buddhism #yes a buddhism tag because fuck it. This is a lecture in and of itself!

[notmoreflippingelves]

Hi! I just read your post about Mateo recently. If I may, can you give me any specific instances in the narrative of the show where Mateo isn’t called out as heavily as they should have? I’m just curious?

During the Shuriki returns arc in particular, Mateo makes some pretty glaring mistakes that I feel like he should've gotten much more flack for (and based on what we see elsewhere in canon, I feel pretty confident that if Gabe, Naomi, Isa, or Esteban at least --and possibly even Elena-- had made these mistakes, they wouldn't have been swept under the rug nearly as quickly as they were for Mateo).

While it's unfair to completely blame Mateo for Carla's manipulating him during the "Rita" arc, I feel like it's reasonable to hold him a *bit* accountable. He did after all blab highly confidential information (on more than one occasion) to try and impress a pretty girl with how clever and important he was. (Something tells me that if any of the others had done likewise, they would've been called out for it. But because it's "beloved" Mateo, we don't even get "wait, you told Rita how to get into your workshop? And you've known her for only a few weeks? What were you thinking, Mateo?") Moreover, he never even apologizes for this or promises to do better/be more careful with such important, sensitive information in the future.

Even more aggravating is his behavior in "The Scepter of Night." Mateo is so eager to play the hero and claim all the glory for himself that he twice (!) disobeys a direct order/abandons the plan and goes looking for the scepter piece on his own. This directly leads to Fiero and Victor finding the scepter piece and (temporarily) stealing it. And it's really only due to luck and very conveniently-timed infighting amongst Shuriki's allies that Elena and co. are able to get the scepter piece back. While Mateo does receive some (brief) criticism, it's nowhere near the level that it should be.

Also noteworthy Elena doesn't really get particularly "mad" at him (especially considering how angry we see her get at other characters even for more minor things) . She's not truly, actually angry at Mateo (and Gabe and Naomi are only a bit angrier); she's just a little frustrated and disappointed at him in the moment. And apart from a (very short) little "do better next time" speech, Mateo doesn't face any real consequences or lingering resentment unlike other characters who do.

When Isa obeys direct orders in "Sister of Invention," she has to face consequences (Elena grounding her). Similarly, Elena holds a grudge against Esteban for days (if not weeks) after he interfered with the Feast of Friendship (a much lower stakes mistake than Mateo's imo). Moreover, it's possible to interpret Esteban's staying behind in Avalor when the others go to see the Norberg Lights as a punishment (either self-inflicted or imposed by Elena) for his actions in the previous episode.

In contrast, Mateo just gets a brief "I expected better from you" speech from Elena and Gabe jokingly assigning him push-ups as punishment (which he immediately takes back when Mateo tries to do them). I'll give Mateo a little bit of credit for actually apologizing this time (which he doesn't always do). But it's still frustrating that everyone is so ready to forgive and forget Mateo's missteps immediately while this same courtesy is seldom shown to others.

I think it's worth directly comparing a few Mateo-centric episodes with a few more similar ones that focus on other characters so that we can see how there does seem to be a noted narrative bias in his favor compared to the others.

Let's start with two "feeling kind of insecure" episodes: "Spellbound" for Mateo vs. "Naomi Knows Best" for Naomi. In the former, Mateo expresses doubt that he's capable of rising to the occasion as royal wizard. No one (except Gabe and he gets over it by the end of the episode) blames him for not having reached his full level of confidence and potential right away and not being able to immediately solve the problem. And Elena in particular (and by extension the narrative) gives him so much validation and support. Whereas in "Naomi Knows Best" (and to a lesser extent "Finders Leapers" and the "Carla-as-Rita" arc as well) the narrative "punishes" Naomi for her feelings of self-doubt. We're told that *if only* Naomi had trusted her gut instincts and stood her ground right away, Elena and co would not fallen right into the trap and that Naomi needs to screw her head back on straight and embrace confidence ASAP to fix her mistake.

When Mateo feels insecure, the narrative gives him every reassurance about how capable and special he is, that he can learn at his own pace, and his insecurity isn't really such a problem after all. When Naomi feels insecure, the narrative encourages her to get over her doubts as quickly as possible because unlike with Mateo, there's "no time" for her to wallow in self-doubt and actually the fact that she even had said doubt in the first place is what "caused" the disaster.

On a slightly different note, Naomi is also called out for taking a little free, fun time for herself in "The Last Laugh" when the group needs her, and yet somehow I have a feeling that Mateo would've been allowed to take a day off if he wanted without any protest. He complains about long hours in "Movin' on Up" and Elena gives him the big royal wizard's chambers for him to relax and unwind in. Naomi asks for one (1) day off to spend with her childhood friend for her birthday , and suddenly it's big drama. (And at the time, Naomi asked for said day off, all Elena needed from her was help doing paperwork. The Team Ash stuff came up unexpectedly.)

Similarly whenever Gabe and Mateo get their little rivalry on ("Spellbound," "Party of a Lifetime," "Captain Mateo" and a few other examples) , the narrative either presents them as equally at fault or Mateo as the only one in the right.

When Gabe brings in Bronzino to train the Royal Guards in magic, it's specifically because Mateo failed to explain how and why he was training the guards in the way he was. If he'd just explained how they were going apply the seemingly basic exercise they were doing to real magic, Gabe likely would've allowed Mateo to continue the training at his own pace.

(Also like. it's super hypocritical imo for Mateo to get annoyed at Gabe feeling impatient/impulsive about their apparent-lack-of progress when Mateo himself is easily the second most impulsive character in the show after Elena.) Mateo feels entitled to keep important information to himself (or blab it to a cute girl he barely knows) even when its no one else's best interest. He's only okay with being "cautious and patient" when he specifically is the one setting the pace. And yet, Gabe is the only one who is called out for his behavior in this episode--even though he might not have acted as he did if only Mateo had trusted him and the guards with an explanation in the first place.

And then there's just a few other "dude not cool" little moments that never really get acknowledged/Mateo never apologizes for. For instance, there a two low-key terrifying Mateo moments in "Captain Mateo" that are not only not acknowledged but are also framed in context as Mateo being just "so funny and quirky". Near the end of "Should be in Charge," Mateo magically gags Gabe so he can't protest anymore about Mateo taking over as leader of the mission. And this is after having already enchanted one of the stationary suits of armor to come to life and fight Gabe. (Gabe admittedly does lightly shove Mateo out of the way during his parts of the song, but that's still a far cry from literally drawing a sword on Mateo as Mateo does via magic to Gabe.)

It's played for laughs (The Grand Council is just smiling happily in the background throughout the scene which is so yikes), so it's easy to overlook what's actually happening. Frankly, it's pretty horrifying that Mateo's natural instinct upon his experience/authority being questioned is to literally attack and then silence. (And attack and silence someone who is supposed to be one of his best friends and closest allies at that!)

Rather than the narrative acknowledging that maybe it's a bad idea to immediately grant power to someone to someone who is so retaliatory against fairly minor criticism, the Grand Council just gives Mateo exactly what he wants and doesn't even offer a "maybe next time, let's not gag or attack our friends, okay?" alongside it. I mean sure Mateo does step down as captain at the end of the episode, but it's very specifically presented as his and Gabe's voluntary choice and not an order from Elena/the Council.

#elena of avalor #eoa salt #it's not mateo that bothers me so much; it's the double standard that nearly every other character is held to while he is not #gabe is the only one who ever seems to call mateo out on his shit regularly #and most of the time; it's framed as petty jealousy and/or gabe being unreasonable #even when gabe is the one talking sense #i feel like i've heard that mateo is one of the writers' faves and dang does it SHOW! #we were owed a dark mateo arc tbh #mateo thinks he's the next alacazar but I don' think it would be all that hard to turn him into the next fiero instead #it writes itself and honestly i would've liked him more that way #instead of just presenting him is as the specialest; cutest; quirkiest magical boy instead #let him go dark for a short time before realizing his mistakes and then have to work hard for everyone's forgiveness #esteban has to sacrifice his life in order to earn forgiveness for an (admittedly huge) mistake he made 40+ years ago #yet it's apparently too much for mateo to get more than the mildest rebuke over a (also big) mistake he made less than an hour ago? #also like whenever esteban or gabe are really proud/cocky or naomi gets single-episode acquired situational narcissism in “my fair naomi” #the narrative absolutely punishes them for it #whereas mateo is free to be as over-confident and braggy and vain as he wants and seldom gets called out on it #because i guess he's genuinely as 'cool and special' as he claims so he deserves the right to brag? #whereas the others' apparently aren't and don't? #anti mateo de alva

[nateriverswife]

I have never seen any author complain about this but i would totally understand if someone would be annoyed that their readers are seeing romance when they intentionally didn't include that.

#i was thinking back to a comment i received and they wrote ''L/Ethe'' which made me realise that some people will inevitably #interpret the story as romantic at some point or with a romantic resolution which spoiler alert (not really) i'm not going to write #that fic is not about romantic love. and after all Ethe will do to L - he would rather be burned alive than being near her #cuz that would be less painful. it's not even going to be ''oh wow yes toxic ship!!'' cuz i am trying to write a realistic story here #and people irl don't want to stay together with someone who treated them like shit for years and ruined their trust in people yk #so yeah. i'm not personally annoyed but if you read it like that. i think you'll miss a lot of the themes i am discussing #i even made Ethe say that L thinks it's just a childish rivalry but it's much more than that so yeah... lmao #in general though. while shipping is totally fine. i think people that look at any story that doesn't have romance as the main focus #like that are not going to get all aspects #this is me being annoying but i think this heavily applies to death note as well cuz you are going to interpret any action as #obsessive toxic love & that takes a lot from the story itself #that's why i also tend to talk more about ''dynamics'' than ''ships'' even when the romantic love is there. #d.exe

[kindlythevoid]

As promised. Memes:

And as promised, ranting:

Okay, so, real talk, I did not actually like everything in this book, but I still fucked with it SO HARD. Like, honestly, I picked up what this was putting down (a little heavy-handedly, but done so well imho???) and the WAY IT WAS WRITTEN????

Like, I did a course on the Aeneid. And obviously it was a Roman mythos, not Greek, but DAMN, CLAIRE NORTH. I could see my translations!!! Written in the vernacular of english!!! RiGHT THERE IN THE TEXXT!!!! I GOT SO FREAKING EXCITED!!! It's just, such little things. The phrasing of a certain line. The odd usage of certain similes or metaphors that go off about people or places. The strange diversions to explain events or people right in the middle of the text before jumping straight back into the story. IT WAS SO VERGIL GUYS I SWEAR.

(i haven't had to translate the greek myths sorry guys and I read the odyssey so many years ago in english many apologies am working off what I got)

And, like, as I said, it was very heavy-handed as it backhanded the greek poets for ignoring the women but, like, she was right??? It was insane guys. It was absolutely insane. And everyone was so nuanced and had personalities and hopes and dreams and backstories and at points I was worried she was going to sacrifice the guys to further the women??? Which, like, I understand the irony, and obv couldn't super fault her for it, but she ended up balancing everyone out so well??? Like the guys were in the background instead but they were still all unique and had different priorities and shit.

Just, this whole book was such a breath of fresh air. Damn.

#as a believer in odypen tho I am a little concerned with how the trilogy is gonna go #but i dont think i can blame her #and honestly i'm not a hundred percent sure if its bc it was thru hera's eyes and if there was a biased narrator #WHICH IS SUPER COOL IN AND OF ITSELF #and obv as a major pjo reader I was eyeing hera with hella suspicion #but obviously this is someone else's interpretation of hera and i honestly kinda fucked with her #like i didn't super like her all the time but she was a damn good narrator #like i didn't like clytemnestra a whoooole bunch like hera but also yeah i could absolutely respect her #like shit this book SLAPPED #I still get so fucking excited about the actual writing itself #it was such a cool blend of classical-writing and just straight up british slang it was so much fun to read fr fr #would recommend if you like feminist books and/or classic greek retellings #i'd have to research to see if any of the things happened in the background of the odyssey or some shit #but overall its a really neat read i think #just yelling into the void #ithaca #ithaca by claire north #meme time #hera #the odyssey

[ur-fav-alien]

Lip Gloss

Steve Harrington shamefully wears girly lip gloss. Actually, he shamefully does a lot of girly things, but you can blame all that on Nancy Wheeler. 

Steve was just so infatuated with how she got to be so soft. It was the one reason he was dating her, because she was so pretty and soft. So naturally, back when they were dating, he asked her what her secret was and after some blissful teasing; she told him. From moisturizers to lip scrubs, Nancy Wheeler educated Steve on how to keep your body fresh and smooth. Naturally, Steve adopted all of these habits. Being the prettiest boy in Hawkins comes with a cost, okay? 

So now, every night before Steve went to bed and every morning before he went to work, he would do this extensive routine that kept his face shining like a waxed car. It was great. No one knew about it until one weekend when Steve had forgotten to hide his self-care products and Billy was over and went into the bathroom. 

“Do you have a sister?” Billy yelled from across the house. 

“What?” Steve was lying on his bed, reading some lame magazine and not even thinking about why Billy might’ve asked that. 

“Do you have a sister?” Billy asked again as he picked up a small jar of something that said ‘body butter’ with the hand that wasn’t currently zipping his pants up after peeing. 

Steve scoffed and stood up off his bed. “No, what would make you think thaa-…” Steve stopped in the middle of the hallway when he saw Billy holding a bottle of face spray that was supposed to hydrate your face in the morning. 

“So I can safely assume that these are all yours?” Billy asked with a smug look on his face. 

Steve bit his lip. He wanted to curl into a ball and explode. Why did Billy Hargrove have to be the one to find out about Steve’s most embarrassing secret? Twice!! Has the man done this, and both times did Steve hate it. 

“Maybe…” he whispered, and Billy’s smug face grew into an annoying smile. 

“I never took you for a pansy.” Billy teased as he picked up a bottle of his face cleanser. 

“I’m not a pansy for taking care of myself.” Steve bit back as he ripped the two skin-care products and slammed them back onto the sink counter. 

Billy spun him around by his waist, pushing him into the marble counter. “No, of course you’re not.” He agreed and smiled lazily at Steve. Leaning in to kiss him slowly, Steve’s heart fluttered with love as his hands hovered over the sides of Billy’s face. “I always wondered how you kept your lips so soft, and now I blame Noxzema.” 

“I actually use a lip scrub I made from honey and sugar.” Steve corrected. 

Billy rolled his eyes. “You’re so lame.” He said before leaning in for another slow kiss. 

And so now Billy Hargrove shamelessly always has chapstick in the back pocket of his jeans, or lip oil in his middle compartment, or some face serum in his glove box. There was always something there for Steve in case he forgot or believed he needed to touch himself up, which Billy thought was never because Steve was perfect in his eyes. And then he would gag himself right after thinking that. 

Steve’s habits didn’t go without teasing, of course. Steve would apply his chapstick and Billy would grab him by the neck and kiss him roughly before complementing the flavor, and Steve would have to reapply the chapstick, only for Billy to kiss him all over again. There were lots of times where Steve would put hand cream and Billy would mock him for masturbating at such a strange time, and when Steve did his nightly routine Billy would always make sure to point out the wrinkles that Steve did not have with a: “You missed your smile lines, grandma. Gotta put more cream on.” And Steve would slam his bathroom door shut. 

And of course, with all these feminine products lying around wherever Billy was, people were obviously going to notice. Like when Max found lip oil and lip gloss in Billy’s middle compartment of his car and hurriedly went to Steve and said: 

“Steve, I think Billy’s cheating on you.” Max whispered at the ice cream counter. 

Steve’s heart dropped because Billy and him had been doing so well and now all of sudden Max was coming to him and telling him that Billy was cheating!? Yeah he flirted with some of the moms at the pool, but that was because Billy was an ass who enjoyed fucking with people, but he wouldn’t cheat on Steve with a fucking mom! 

“What!?” He spit, a little too loud for the privacy of their conversation. 

“Yeah! I saw like lip oil and lip gloss in the compartment of his car.” 

Steve froze. Why did life have to play out this way for him? Why did Billy have to be such a caring boyfriend and let Steve leave his stuff around? Why the fuck did he have to be such a pansy? “Yeah, Max, that’s uh…” He didn’t know how to say this. Really, he could’ve played along with Max and been absolutely shocked that Billy was cheating on him. “That’s my stuff.” 

Max’s face contoured in confusion. “What…?” 

Steve sucked in a breath as he scratched his neck awkwardly. “Yeaah… I use… lip oil.” 

“And lip gloss?” 

Steve shamefully nodded his head. 

Max’s shoulders slumped. “Wow.” She said in amazement. “How is my brother dating you?” 

“I have no idea- Are you going to buy some ice cream?” 

Max stared at him for a second before saying yes and buying some chocolate ice cream and leaving in a daze. Robin opened up the glass dividers. 

“What was that about?” She asked. 

“I…” Steve turned around and leaned against the counter. “I don’t want to tell you.” 

“That’s a little rude, Stevie.” 

“What have I said about you calling me that?” He groaned. 

“That you love it.” 

“Oh, my- shut up.” He turned back around as Robin closed the glass dividers with little girl giggles. 

One thing that Steve loved about Billy was that he didn’t care, that was his favorite thing about his boyfriend. Billy didn’t give a single fuck about what anyone thought of him, and that included people thinking he was weird for carrying such feminine products on his person. Like the one time after the Starcourt incident when Billy, Robin, and him were walking out of a movie theater and Steve’s lips were feeling dry after eating all that popcorn. He started patting down his pockets for his chapstick, but he just couldn’t find any. 

Billy stopped and whipped something out of his pocket and handed Steve lip gloss.

“Oh, thanks.” Steve gleefully took the tube and applied it to his lips. And then a snort took him away from his self care to see Robin staring at the two of them. Steve sighed and dreaded the thought that he had to expose his most embarrassing secret to another person. 

“What?” Billy hissed. “You’ve never seen a man have lip gloss?” 

Steve stared in awe as Billy took the blame for the lip gloss. 

Robin held her hands up in defense. “No, I just think it’s funny.” 

“Taking care of yourself isn’t funny, Robin.” Billy took the tube away from Steve. “You know you would do some good if you took care of yourself every once in a while. Maybe try some eye cream, your eye bags are showing.” Billy shoved past Robin to his car. 

The two friends were standing still in shock, their jaws touching the floor because holy fuck, Billy Hargrove did not just take the blame for Steve’s feminine ways. 

“Hey assholes!” Billy yelled from his car. “Let’s get on with it! There’s a party down at Tommy’s! I wanna crash it!” 

Steve was well aware he was in love with Billy Hargrove, and he was well aware Billy Hargrove was in love with him. But holy shit, did Steve now know that they were in love. Because what other manly guy would pretend to know all about self-care to protect his boyfriend’s self-esteem? 

He barked out a laugh at Robin before jogging away to Billy’s car. Robin soon followed with a defeated look in her eyes.

#harringrove #steve harrington #billy hargrove #BACK AGAIN WITH ANOTHER FIC #harringrove fanfic #look I know we got that whole montage of Billy pampering himself in s2 BUT LET ME HAVE GIRLY STEVE OKAY #The last scene was something random that popped into my head so I wrote this. I just think Steve would go into the whole self-care process. #Billy also takes care of himself but not in the extent that Steve goes because Billy just isn't like that #also I might make this into a post itself but you guys would be okay with longer fics right? Because my other fics are like 7+ pages. #I don't mean to make them so long I just end up getting really into the zone and writing a shit ton. #I could also just post the super long ones to AO3 and see how they'll do on there. maybe...

[scintillatingshortgirl19]

i just have one question which is

what in the actual motherfucking HELL

#halfway thru season 2 and i'm pretty sure this is the most explicitly romantic scene that has happened so far #like if i didn't know better #i would think this was genuinely meant to be a romantic plotline #i mean this is *literal* romcom shit #secretly deleting a man's voicemail in order to ensure that he continues living in your apartment with you?? as bros??? #sure a lot of their scenes have felt flirtatious #but if you filter those scenes through a 'straight ppl writing this in 2005 and most likely without queerbaiting even being on their radar' #you can see how there's a platonic interpretation? #even with the 'we might kiss' scene #the scene itself isn't particularly romantic - it's just the fact that it has that song over it #(in other words it was edited that way but it wasn't really written that way) #but this scene?? it's the song AND the full context #there really is no heterosexual explanation for this one #(though i'm sure house would insist this is all just so he can more easily steal wilson's food :)) #house md #wilson #house season 2 #house s02e15 #videos - house #op

[thegrimreaperisanerd]

Maaan, I'm so bad at spotting nature metaphors, what's your favorite to include in your writing?

unhinged_prosody 🕺

Hi! 🕺

I'm putting this under a read more because I waffled on for a fair bit and it's not even about the base game 😭

So I'm including animals under nature because, well, they are nature - and I personify people as animals a lot in my writing (just in general, not even specific to this fic, i do it a lot about myself too, especially in my poetry)

Because we're all just animals! It can be degrading - depending on how it's done - but not all of the time.

I compare Harry to a dog a lot (nothing new there, there's a couple lines in game that reinforce this) but I think my favourite dog guy description came from one of the Kim chapters:

the captain's father; a man so old he should be retired, but sits at his desk chain-smoking. Something he's done for longer than you've been in the RCM. Maybe longer than you've been alive. As you penetrate the haze surrounding his desk his bloodshot eyes rise to meet your own. He reminds you somewhat of a saggy hunting dog, all lethargy and wrinkles.

Because i have no specific appearance in mind for the man (i.e. hair colour/ eyes/ whatever) as it's unimportant. S'more about vibes 👌

Gotta give a shout out to bird metaphors because they formed the theming of these fics in the first place! The peregrin falcon antique shop, references to ducks and geese across fics, the whole scene with the disabled duckling, the name of the case, "Imprinting", the series title "birds of a feather flock together", i just really fucking love birds.

Lmao anyway, you can tell that I REALLY like a metaphor if I turned it into a mind project (not nature related, but same with the "one man castle" thought project for Kim repressing his emotions)

So I'm dipping back into "Imprinting" because this one metaphor formed the basis of me writing over 250k about two fictional detectives last year...:

PROBLEM: You were a man drowning in the sea of vices. As you gave in to the waves and consigned yourself to your watery grave a gloved hand pulled you from the brine. *He* cradled your baby bird form in his palm and raised you from the ashes of the phoenix: Tequila Sunset. You have well and truly imprinted upon Lieutenant Kim Kitsuragi.

SOLUTION: You were drowning and he gave you a reason to float. It's not so much that you imprinted on him, it's that you follow him by choice. You've shed your baby down-feathers and are more than able to walk on your own now, but do you want to?

BABY BIRD

IMPRINTING

DOWN FEATHERS

THE DEATH AND REBIRTH OF A PHOENIX

BOSH BOSH FUCKIN' BOSH 👌👌👌

But my ABSOLUTE favourite nature metaphor at the moment is the flowers metaphor for Kim's repression. Because when I was a teenager up until my mid 20s (going THROUGH it, not relevant) this was my outlook on love and human connection, too:

CONCEPTUALISATION [hard: success] - Don't plant flowers: they'll only wilt.

CONCEPTUALISATION [hard: success] - Love says 'These flowers were cut so you could buy them. They wilt - already - in your hand and that is *your* fault'.

I am now 27 and in the Springtime of my life, this man's 44 and approaching his own no matter how badly he's trying to beat it off with a stick. When I was in my early 20s, I was fairly convinced I would die wholly unloved (even in the beginning of the relationship I am still in!) Not the case! Healing is possible and I truely believe - or rather I know now - that there is no age cutoff.

This metaphor isn't finished yet, but it represents catharsis 🌱

#Thank you!!!!!! #THIS GOT SO LONG SORRY!! #Anyway yes i really like talking about the writing itself if you're ever curious about Themes and Motifs then hmu #Or keeping sending me weird shit it does make me laugh #Jean anon i've been thinking about you all weekend 😭 #DUCKLINGS THAT DROWN #IMPRINTING #Hey thanks for the ask by the way #typing this all out just snapped me out of writer's block!