Tumgik
#like this probably makes me a bad social researcher but I don't really care because I don't think it should have to be on marginalized ppl
oscar-wilde-thing · 5 months
Text
Four years ago I sat in a psychiatrist's office. I was explaining why a certain Cognitive Behavioral Therapy technique felt impossible.
"If I don't think I know how a social interaction is going to work out, if I don't know the pattern, I can't do it."
The Dr nodded, and we moved on.
A few sessions later, she said she didn't think she could work with me anymore.
Great, I thought to myself. I'm being dumped by my therapist.
"I don't think I can work with you, because I think you're autistic."
I literally felt my world shift underneath me.
She explained more, about social interactions, about hyper sensitivity, about pattern recognition and anxiety and early-life academic achievement. I did end up stopping treatment with her, I don't really remember why. But I held that suggestion in my head.
The end of 2019 was rocky- working retail around the holidays is its own special hell, and my grandmother died in December of that year.
Then 2020 happened. COVID and isolation and protests and my workplace unionizing. Through all of that I was reading, and watching videos, and researching. About how autism and neurodivergency presents differently in girls and AFAB people. How the research is incredibly outdated and mostly focused on white, middle class boys. How getting a diagnosis as an adult, let alone an AFAB adult, is a fight.
I kept trucking along, learning new ways to cope. Figuring out that sometimes what I had thought were anxiety attacks was actually sensory overload. That my penchant for spreadsheets and what I called my "encyclopedic nerd brain" were probably hyper fixations.
It took 4 years.
4 years, 8 more mental health professionals, a mental breakdown, a month in residential mental health care, and 5 more months in acute daily mental health care, but today, at 12:55PM, I was officially diagnosed with Autism.
I'm sitting here at my desk weeping because I'm both so happy and so angry. Happy that there's a reason I feel the way I feel, that there's a reason why the world seems so harsh, that there's a reason why I sometimes physically can't talk and a reason why certain foods and sounds and textures make me want to crawl out of my skin. But I'm also so angry that it took 26 years for anyone to see. That it took another 4 years for me to get any answers. That there are countless other little girls and adult AFABS like me out there who feel like they're doing everything they're supposed to but not getting what the world tells them they should be getting.
My life has changed. Or maybe it hasn't changed. Maybe a door has opened that had never been seen before.
I'm not sure how to wrap this up.
I just know that learning more about myself is rarely a bad thing. And now that I know this big piece of who I am, I'll be able to go forward and learn more ways to exist in this world as an autistic person.
332 notes · View notes
cemeterything · 10 months
Note
is all true crime bad? genuine question. not referring to the very obvious disrespectful ones that are usually brought up when discussing the topic but rather documentaries and things of the sort. I feel like a lot of the documentaries around real crimes I watched bring up issues that aren't really talked about and a lot of the times are covered by institutions/media and also inform people on various things that they probably wouldn't have been aware otherwise so to me they can be very informational. there's also cases where victims of abduction for example have been recognised years later because of media like this which is objectively a good thing so I would like to know a little more about other negative impacts that might not be so obvious. if you have any source I can research on that's also great. sorry to bother!
i think that "true crime" in itself is a nuanced and varied topic and have no intention of tarring everyone who has an interest in it with the same brush, because there are definitely respectful ways of engaging with it that do their best to avoid and minimize harm. however i think that the popular culture depictions of true crime and capitalization on it as a form of entertainment tend to do more harm than good to both victims, who are frequently exploited for "content" and/or have their trauma dredged up for consumption, and consumers/producers, since a lot of mainstream true crime media reinforces harmful stereotypes, paranoia, surveillance tactics, and social divisions, and sensationalizes human cruelty and suffering. not to mention that this kind of approach to and fascination with horrific crimes and unusually cruel and violent criminals may encourage more people to inflict violence on others in order to gain notoriety and fame.
i don't think it's wrong to be interested in these things and to want to understand what makes people do horrific things to other people. one of my hyperfixations is the history of decapitation/capital punishment and its legacy, which is a topic that is fraught with issues surrounding the abuse of some of the most marginalized and vulnerable members of society. i myself am fascinated by it partly because of my own past experiences with abuse and marginalization. being interested in unpleasant things doesn't make you inherently a bad person, and thought crimes don't exist. however it's really important, especially when it comes to topics like this, to be self aware and critical of the information you're given, and to be careful not to be taken in by popular opinion and stereotypes without questioning them, or to get so immersed in your pursuit of knowledge and understanding that you lose your grip on reality and fall victim to misinformation and bias. believing too strongly in your personal ability to recognize and identify criminals and "criminal traits" and "solve" crimes, especially when the justice system is as flawed as it is, is more likely to lead to incorrect assumptions, the persecution of the marginalized and vulnerable, invasions of privacy and miscarriages of justice than it is to help.
476 notes · View notes
just-an-enby-lemon · 1 month
Text
"I... Of course I had a childhood Alice!" Gwen complains, trying not to pout. She had tricked herself into believing that her new promotion into external research would've come with some extra respect from her coworkers. It didn't.
Colin only mumbled something about suicidal ideas and "do you know what you're dealing with" before going back into his usal cutting cabbles and threatining the computers. Sam, well, Sam was actually very enthusiastic about the future results of her research. It was quite nice. She honestly didn't care much about Celia. New people often didn't stay and she had no reason to think Celia would just because she was acting creeply non-affected by the whole awfull job of cursed stories ordeal.
And there was Alice. That one was on Gwen. She should've known better than to expect that Alice would change, likely Alice didn't even know what being respectifull meant.
"A boooring chidlhoold." Alice said, her attention still mostly in her computer scream. Playing solitaire. Somehow Alice managed to find a way to do barely any work and never have any backlog and Gwen had gave up on discovering how.
"It wasn't boring." It really was. Her parents took formality very seriusly and had a tendency to see childrem as small adults. But sometimes they had nice trips and Gwen liked to play office or lawyer. Besides she usually had fun with her cousin, well, when he wasn't using picking her up from school as an excuse to pass by his weed dealer or forgetting her in places. Honestly he was still a better deal than the babysitters. At least for her social life.
Alice raised an eyebrow.
"I was a very well-dressed child." It was not a defense of anything. It was basically a non-sequitor but Gwendolyn needed to protect her family from the insult of having a child with a less than perfect childhood and her mind went blank (probably because of stress. It wasn't really a bad childhood was it?).
"Oh no." Alice said in a ton that was actually sympathetic. "Please tell me your parents didn't force you into formal wear."
It was soo sincere that Gwen sort of broke (and it was just because Alice was rarely sincere and not because the other woman was really attractive in a soft way when sincere).
"My older cousin once told us that if we didn't look presentable we would be switched by an evil regency body hopper." Alice giggled delighted and it was all that was needed for Gwen to keep going. "When I pointed out he was the only one in informal wear he turned to me and told me, as if the biggest secret, that the reason he was always smoking was because the evil georgian tracked bouchards by smell and the weed kept him hidden."
"What a delightfully strange cousin." Alice said. "Maybe your childhood was not all that boring. Maybe it's just you."
Gwen frowed. All the good feelings from before turning into smoke and going slowly away.
"I don't know why I still even talk to you."
Alice opened her mouth, likely to tell another joke. But stopped.
"It was a nice story, Gweeeen, no idea why you told me, specially knowing that now I will want more absurd tales from Tiny Gwen as the blood payement for surviving this place, but it was nice. "
It was an olive branch if Gwen ever saw one.
And even if things never became actually good between them, even if she started yesterday feeling dumb for thinking Alice cared, even if it would make her fantasies of kissing Dyer worse. Gwen took it.
"I have enough stories for it. But don't expect then for free, I'll trade for biscuits, Celia mentioned you have a secret stash."
"Dammit Sam." Alice mumbled but she was smilling.
45 notes · View notes
thegayhimbo · 3 months
Text
Tumblr media
Say "I know nothing about the history of Russia's treatment of Ukraine (the Holodomor being one such example) or what's currently going on between Russia and Ukraine" without saying it. 🙄😒
youtube
For those who can't access the video due to the "age restriction," here is a transcript of the 60 Minutes interview with Scott Pelley interviewing Freed Ukrainian Prisoners of War:
SPOILER ALERT: The following video/transcript contains descriptions of beatings, torture, rape, starvation, child deaths, and human rights violations.
As for "Russia is not continuously bombing all civilian infrastructure and committing a genocide," there have been multiple posts and articles over the past 2 years proving otherwise (including their recent attack on New Year's Eve). This also includes the Russian war crime of Ukrainian children being kidnapped by Russian soldiers, deported to Russian reeducation camps, getting brainwashed, and being used as Russian Propaganda tools:
youtube
Between the 2:27 and 2:37 mark, Isobel Yeung (the narrator) doesn't mince her words when she notes how Vladimir Putin and his cronies are accused of trying to "ethically cleanse a generation of young Ukrainians."
If you've read this far, you can probably come to the conclusion that imtryingsir did absolutely zero research, or even cared enough to follow the last 2 years of news about the Russian-Ukraine War, before making their abhorrently idiotic comment.
So why am I bothering to dignify this with a response when it's clear this person is being maliciously stupid? Because of this post. Specifically, the disgusting little remark they made where they tried to justify why a Jewish woman on social media deserved to be bullied/harassed (which eventually led to the Russia apologist comment above when they were called out on it by multiple Tumblr users):
Tumblr media
Putting aside the gross victim-blaming and thinly-disguised antisemitism (which I'm sure my Jewish followers are deeply sick of at this point), what really gets me is how disingenuous this user is. They don't actually give a rat's ass about what's going on in Gaza: Someone who truly cares about genocide and the deaths/suffering of innocent people wouldn't be going out of their way to downplay/whitewash the genocidal actions of another country (Russia), or making comments dismissing another groups problems/trauma while dehumanizing them, or even straight up wishing for more death and destruction:
Tumblr media
People like this (as well as the so-called "Pro-Palestine" users in the Jewish woman's post who were harassing her) are devoid of empathy. They relish in being cruel and condescending to others because they feel empowered in doing so, and they know they can get away with it without facing lasting consequences. They are doing nothing to help alleviate an already horrific situation, and are just making the world a worse place to live in. I'm sure they'll tell themselves the sweet little lies about how their bullying and antisemitism is really "activism" or "caring for Palestinians" or "Being antizionist; not antisemitic" (while continuing to spew the same bigoted rhetoric that Jews have been calling out as antisemitic for YEARS). At this point, I truly don't give a damn what their excuses are since they will grasp at anything, no matter how flimsy, to rationalize their behavior.
I never thought I'd see the day where a bunch of Leftist/Westerners would embody two of the most loathsome fictional characters in media (right down to their hateful, sadistic, vile attitudes), and yet that is the point we've currently reached:
Tumblr media Tumblr media
To say this has been deeply unpleasant to witness is an understatement. 😒
I talked about this in a recent post about antisemitism from the Left, and I'm going to reiterate something I said: "There is a larger conversation that needs to be had about how selective Leftist empathy and compassion really is. By this, I’m talking about people on the Left who will a.) Only be compassionate/empathetic when it’s convenient for them, or b.) Only be compassionate/empathetic towards people they think are “deserving” of it."
People like imtryingsir only prove why it's important to have this conversation: If you're perfectly okay dismissing/downplaying the suffering of one group of people (be it Jews, Ukrainians, Palestinians, etc) so you can prop up your preferred group of people who are suffering because you think they are more "deserving" of empathy/compassion......................you need to do some serious self-reflection about the type of person you've become.
45 notes · View notes
lloydasspound · 4 months
Text
Tumblr media
Um Pokemon brainrot came back for the 7299292th time. Lloyd edition
Insane person ramblings below cut^_^
I think there are two major routes you can take when attempting to Pokemonize Lloyd. The first is just making him Colress. They are functionally the same character- similar interests, motivations, and morals. AKA generic mad scientist who wishes to create "the strongest machine/weapon/i dont even know", who doesn't care about the violence or sacrifice, arguably works for the wrong side, and remains friendly to the main characters anyway. Like, there genuinely is not much to expand upon there. Just pop out Colress and snap Lloyd into his place and there you go I guess.
(BTW Colress was one of the first characters I was ever deeply obsessed with as a kid. This does not mean anything)
The second route is trying to replace Lloyd's interests with machines into something canon typical that also reflects his role in the series. Unsubtle way of looking you in the eyes and telling you I want him to be a Pokemon Regional Professor so bad because I said so.
(Colress was my original but the chokehold Professor Sycamore has had on me for over a year now......I am not biased at all umm)
While a Pokemon Professor is probably a littleee too goody two shoes and social for Lloyd, it is The role that always implies extreme amounts of research in some dedicated niche. Lloyd can exclusively research man-made/object inspired Pokemon or something! Close enough to robots. Either way, the whole plot of the game is that the Professor chooses a small batch of kids, gives them a strong Pokemon to start off, and then tells them to go collect data, while the kids usually end up changing the world instead. Lloyd's whole role in Code Geass is he gives a strong weapon to Suzaku in exchange for him collecting data, and then Suzaku goes and does fuck whatever with it until the planet is fixed I don't know. Literally the same! And honestly, we just deserve a Pokemon Professor who is a bit of an unlikeable freak.
I do not think Lloyd would care about battling much and I do not think he really cares about Pokemon themselves a whole lot either! But their abilities and possibilities would probably interest him similarly to how he is invested in Knightmares. And even if he acts like he doesn't care, he definitely has a little litter of Aron sleeping in his house.
Anyway code geass pokemon crossover is NEVER going to happen but I think it is silly. There an an Alcremie sitting on his table
23 notes · View notes
jarvis-cockhead · 9 months
Text
Rejection sensitive dysphoria awareness & how I cope
Disclaimer: I don't claim to be an expert, this is advice from my personal experiences aimed to help others who experience RSD, as I have a long term experience with the condition and don't often see people talk about how to manage it. I've had to figure out a lot of it myself so I wanted to share my methods for anyone else who might find them useful :] please if you think you experience RSD or any other neurodivergency do your own research, or ask for a professional opinion. Also please feel free to say so if you think my methods are actually bad/harmful or if you have any other methods, because like I said, this is just stuff I've figured out for myself, I don't claim to know it all!
Rejection sensitive dysphoria (RSD) is, in short, a severe emotional reaction to real or perceived rejection. It's most commonly linked to ADHD however it is likely something which just more commonly develops in people with certain neurodivergencies (I have a diagnosis of autism, for example). It hasn't been researched very much so there isn't that much information out there about what it is or how to manage it, but it's something which can significantly affect your wellbeing and your relationships with others. At times I find it debilitating. I've experienced it for a number of years now and I've spent a lot of time on self awareness and analysing RSD based anxiety. I hope this not only helps others with RSD but helps to spread awareness of the condition- if you think you experience RSD you absolutely are not alone.
The anxiety lens
It can be really tricky to identify which thoughts are real and which are not because the nature of RSD is one which is paranoid and always jumps to conclusions, and the phrase 'what if' is very powerful. One way I've learnt to deal with this is to remember something very important: when anxiety is present it is like a lens you will look through and it will cloud your judgement of what you see. If you are experiencing RSD and are worried your friend is upset with you, you will listen to them/read their messages as if this is true, and this is where your 'proof' comes from. RSD is triggered by perceived rejection, and of course this will be worse and more frequent when anxiety is clouding your perceptions. Reminding myself of this is probably the most useful method I have found to deal with RSD because it follows the RSD anxiety path as far back as you can take it. There are no 'what if's, the anxiety will be making you see things from an altered perspective.
Anxiety sources
Are there any other reasons your anxiety could be worse right now? Stress and hormonal changes commonly exaggerate my anxiety and this frequently manifests as RSD. Identifying this doesn't always make the anxiety go away, but it does give some peace of mind of the likely real reason for why I am suddenly feeling so much worse.
Social exhaustion
I find I can swing into a very low spot very quickly after seeing friends, which is most likely just social exhaustion but because it has come directly after socialising it can feel as if there must be a reason, and the RSD reason is that the social interaction must have 'failed'. I also find this especially difficult with my friends who also experience social exhaustion and also need a period of recharge because this could mean they aren't as chatty as usual, which of course feeds the RSD. Remember that you (and possibly your friend also) are likely just tired, and give yourself time to rest.
The better it is, the worse it gets
A cruel side to RSD I feel is that the more I care for someone, or the more fun I had in a social interaction, the worse my RSD can be. I can also find it hard to understand why someone is friends with me or accept that this is the case, and I get very scared of losing the people I care most about. However more often than no your friends do care about you just as much as you do for them, or they wouldn't be your friends at all. Your friends love you and they will not just abandon you or reject you for no reason, or even if you do make a mistake, because mistakes can be talked through and overcome. The RSD conclusion jump that your friend suddenly hates you is so incredibly unlikely (and if it does happen then that doesn't sound like much of a friend in the first place.)
Help! my friend has disappeared for a day (or longer)
This is never fun, RSD loves it when this happens because there is so much room for 'what if's. You must just remind yourself that it's very unlikely you're the reason they've disappeared, especially when you've not done anything deliberate which would upset them. They really are most likely just busy!
One good way to help deal with this long term is to have strong communication foundations where possible. Let your friend know this is something you struggle with, and let each other know that if there is ever a real issue, you can talk about it. Doing this will give you more room to breathe and more reassurance that there are no issues because your friend has not told you there are. It also isn't really your responsibility to be hyper aware of what you might have maybe possibly done 'wrong', it's up to the other person to tell you if there's an issue. Remembering that you're allowed to not worry about whether you've accidentally done something wrong can take a lot of weight off.
Help! I can feel myself trapped in an anxiety spot/loop
Sometimes while anxious if I talk to a friend I can get trapped in a loop of needing and seeking reassurance, knowing that I'm on the verge of an RSD based breakdown. My best advice for this is to just tell your friend you think you are entering/are in an anxiety loop- I find that exposing the anxiety makes it easier to deal with, while not actively asking for reassurance. Asking for reassurance in the moment is something I try to avoid wherever possible. While it can make things feel really hard and like youre suffering alone, I personally try not to so I can build up my resilience, as doing so can just reinforce the anxiety. Plus while I'm in an anxious state that reassurance sometimes doesn't do much anyway because I'm still seeing things from a perspective of anxiety.
I worry that my RSD will upset my friends or offend them
RSD can make you feel horrible for doubting your friends, and it can feel scary admitting any of these feelings to them for fear that they'll be offended you've thought that way about them, or that you're blaming them for your RSD. But good friends will listen and understand and know this isn't what you intend. To help, approach conversations from the angle of 'my anxiety causes me to feel this way', not that they themselves cause you to feel this way.
Why is this even happening to me?
RSD is suspected to develop from certain sorts of experiences in life, and is more likely to develop in those who are neurodiverse. Identifying what might have caused my RSD has given me a lot of peace of mind and reassurance that I'm not just going mad- these are responses based on past experience.
Conclusion
Managing RSD, from my experience, is a lot of building resilience and healthier thought patterns. It never truly goes away but you can get better at minimising it's effects. Introspection is key to deconstructing RSD and tracing it back to the sources. It's usually never actually about the other people around you, despite it absolutely feeling that way. I hope at least some of my experiences could be helpful to anyone who experiences RSD- best of luck and best wishes if you do :]
43 notes · View notes
Note
Okay hear me out so I was watching the “Hazbin Hotel” series that is streaming on prime video and as I was watching the show I got to thinking? What is the? LOV had a S/O whose quirk is similar to Alastor the radio demon from Hazbin Hotel (S/O has a regular voice, but only uses Alistair radio voice only for show)
and the first time they fought against the heroes or the MLA (re-Destro’s army) and they saw S/O’s transform into there, demon form (because that’s part of their quirk) and the LOV were like “that is terrifying, but also amazing at the same time!” And it made them fall even more in love with their S/O😅
I haven't watched this show to be honest. I remember only seeing the original (which I think is the pilot?) way back a few years on YouTube. I'm hearing the pilot I saw wasn't even canon but whatever, it's all I got to go by haha. From what I can remember, he seemed to be super strong and creepy but also pretty funny here and there. I see things on social media about the show but it's mostly videos of the songs and cosplays. Anyway, wish me luck because I did no further research for this and I'm sorry lol)
Tumblr media
headcanon|scenario|imagine|match-up|drabble
-Impressed but a little scared: Surely Compress will tell you outright after witnessing you in action, that he's impressed (and whispers that he's a little scared). Up until this point you probably didn't display the full ability of your quirk. You never felt the need to and (yes, I'm capping your power) after using it you need to recharge for some days and possibly a week or so. It was a 'use fully only when needed' kind of power. He's not sleeping with one eye open, but he knows if you ever for whatever reason decided to do so that you could eliminate him and everyone around him. The danger never scared him too much. Twice knows you won't hurt him, but he also is careful not to step out of line. It's not like you don't love him as much as he does you...it's just that if one day you decided to turn against the villains then he knows he wouldn't be safe. This is BEFORE he harnessed his ability. Afterward he's a little more secure. Also is more than impressed and proud of you!
-In complete awe: (and yes I know Kurogiri wasn't available for the battle but if he were then you'd get a lot of praise from him) Spinner would have a small jaw-drop moment when he'd seen you pull your power out. He probably didn't know it could be so intimidating! He probably feels a small swell in his chest thinking of the bit of pride he has for you already increasing by the day. Then again, Spinner is proud of you for anything you do no matter what. Also in complete would likely be Magne too. She's going to be your biggest fan even if you were quirkless, but she assumed the opposite considering your voice changing on a whim. Feel bad for everyone else having to listen to her brag about you on a daily basis!
-Doesn't care and means it: No offense but Dabi likely doesn't care all that much. I mean, yeah he's slightly impressed but you won't see him fanboying over you or anything. However, your ability does make him take a second to look over his own. Perhaps he'll ask you to go toe to toe with him one of these days. Just be easy on him! Muscular is more along the lines of 'it aint shit unless you can beat me in a fight with it'. He challenges you just about everyday. He's pretty cocky to be honest. Refuses to admit you could possibly be stronger than him even if it's true. Not to be rude or anything but Moonfish doesn't care what your ability is or is not. All he really cares about it you. Which could both be an 'awe' or 'oh...' moment depending on who you are as a person. He doesn't mean anything negative by it! Just doesn't care is all.
-ACTS like they don't care but actually does: Shigaraki would pretend as much as he wants to but everyone knows he's rather amazed by you. He's always been this way with everything in the relationship concerning you. He's not all that open with you when it comes to how he feels. It's not till later in the relationship that he ends up opening more and more for you. So at the beginning "Yeah it's kind of cool I suppose but it really doesn't concern me in the least bit what power you have. It's about how you use it to benefit us and our organization." Then later it transforms into you being his heavy hitter on the team. He's conflicted between putting you on the frontlines because of your power and wanting to keep you safe near him instead.
11 notes · View notes
thequietkid-moonie · 1 year
Note
I love your work! , It's Amazing! You're a great writer.
If i'm not bothering you May i request an headcanon for Jack the ripper and Tesla with a depressed s/o?
Feel free to decline the request
Jack and Tesla with a depressed S/O
Tumblr media
[ HEADCANONS ] [ Jack the Ripper, Nikola Tesla ]
[ Shuumatsu no Valkyrie / Records of Ragnarok ]
⚠️ TW: depression, mention of self-harm
Tumblr media
Ok, first off all thank you so much for your words dear! Thats make me feel a lot better about my writing 🥺
Sorry for make you wait! And don't worry, you're not bothering at all, you request come in a good time because I need comfort too. I hope you like it and makes you feel comforted! Don't forget to take care of yourself!! ❤️
Tumblr media
Jack the Ripper
It hurt him seeing you feeling so bad, your a really special person you should bright with beautiful colors. Jack know no one can he happy all the time, but you shouldn't feel like this
Jack had encounter the worst of this world since he was a kid, so if there is someone to blame for you feeling this way, he will make sure to end their life nobody mess with his beloved
If you're the type to try to hide it behind a smile thats not going to work with him, he can see your true colors with his right eye, but will respect your decision of hiding it and for a while will just give you some hints that he knows and you don't have to hide it, he is here to help you recover your beautiful colors, even if take all his life he won't give up on you and neither leave you alone
The day you open up to Jack about you depression he listen carefuly all you say, and after he promise you that he will help you with whatever he can, he even suggest getting profesional help (if you're not taking it already, thats it)
He will never make you feel you guilty or bad for feeling like this, he knows you can't helped, instead he will help you at the best of his habilities
If Jack ever hear you make a self-depracation comment/joke he will inmediatly deny it, reassuring you that you're not such thing and offer you to talk about it (if you want)
We know Jack is a gentelman, but he will be even more gentle and sweet with you (specialy in the worst days)
Whenever you get a really bad day (or just need comfort) he will cook your favorite/comfort food (he may not be the best cook, but will try for you), and will offer you to cuddle while he reads for you to comfort you (he won't mind if you fall sleep), embracing you like he's hiding you from the rest of the world
He's always up to heard you vent or just talk to distract yourself
If you ever self-harm or have past scars he will make sure to take proper care of your wounds while reassuring you that he's not mad and you don't have to feel ashame for this. After he will give you sweet kisses (if you let him of course) and offer you anything you want for comfort (maybe some tea or some cuddles)
He's afraid of losing you, and at some point he will expressed it to you, but will remember you that he's by your side and won't leave you alone on this!
Tumblr media
Nicolas Tesla
This take him off guard, this man isn't really used to this kind of situation (he's not really a social person), but he's smart (and loves you a lot) so he inmediatly research all he can about the topic and how to help you
He probably don't enteraly understand what are you feeling, sure he felt lonely sometimes, but not at the extent of depression, so he will prefer to talk to you directly about it (but will be patient and wait if theres something you're not ready to talk about)
If you're the type to hide it with a smile it will take him a while to actually notice it, but the moment he do Tesla get really worried and tell you right away that you shouldn't hide it
If you need to vent he's open to listen. He even offer you to try something to vent, like writing, building something or even destroying something
Now he get the personal goal to invent something that will help you out, something that will make your life easier or just something that will make you happy
He knows pretty well how it feels being lonely, so he don't really likes to leave you alone, Tesla always invite you over to his lab to hang out, but if you dont want to go out he will let you his robot pigeons to keep you company
If he ever hear you make a self-depracation comment/joke he will inmediatly ask you why do you say/think that about yourself, and deny it with compliments
If you need to distract yourself he will rant about his new theory/invention. Also, whenever he manage to makes you smile (or even laugh) with this he will feel so proud of himself! This give him a lot motivation to continue for both of you (nothing makes him more happier that help you feel better)
If and when you have those worst days when don't feel like doing anything Tesla will take a break of his work just to take care of you and making you company. If you try to deny and make him go to do his work he inmediatly deny it No! Non! Nem! Nein! saying that you're as important as his work for him (and even more)
If you ever self-harm or have past scars he will panic a little, his priority right now is take care of it, after make sure your wounds are treated then he will talk with you about it. He's not mad just worried about you. It truly sadden him that you feel the need to do something like this, but he assurge you that he is here to help you out! There is no problem without a solution!
Tesla is afraid of losing you, but he's confident that things won't get worst, he's making sure to take care of you, and he even suggest search professional help, if you already have he offers to company you sometimes
Tumblr media
101 notes · View notes
formulatrash · 1 year
Note
Obviously you don't have to answer if you don't want to, but was just wondering what you think of Lewis' vacation to Antarctica. I've seen a lot of opinions on it and it's made me quite annoyed
hmm, well. so: the bit of Antarctica that he's in is the southern tip of Argentina, not the island that we tend to call the Antarctic. which does somewhat make a difference because that's a place (not many but some) people live not a research station in a desert. there is a lot of tourism to this part of the Antarctic - cruise ships take people there to see it, you can organise trips there as a normal person. so he's not entirely flexing a privilege to do something only he could.
which doesn't, of course, make the environmental and social impacts of tourism in vulnerable regions any better.
for someone who genuinely cares a lot about animals and the environment, Lewis is sometimes really a dork about thinking things through. people shouldn't be that close to penguins and seals and probably a good idea to leave the scant amount of sheet ice alone and not treat it as a ski slope. Tierra del Fuego is often thought about as the end of the world; unfortunately, the climate is actually looking like that.
do I think Lewis is doing it with any malice? no, of course not. and maybe he has been educating himself while he's there. but there are far less environmentally impactful places to do that from; watch Frozen Planet, y'know.
the other factor is that Tierra del Fuego is home to indigenous people who are unlikely to profit from tourism and whose home is affected by it. Mapuche people, the largest indigenous group in Argentina, live there and so do Yaghans and other Fuegans. tourism affects indigenous people's rights to use their land, as well as animal populations and creating pollution and potential energy conflict.
so: there are lots of reasons why holidaying in Antarctica is not great and conflicts with a lot of what Lewis believes. does that make him hypocritical? yes but I suspect in an unaware way; he's sometimes extremely oblivious because he has spent his entire adult life in a very small bubble, which his efforts to educate himself beyond sometimes disguise how much those are things he had to do deliberately, not information that was fed to or came naturally to him.
I am not delighted he's done it. I don't think he intended to cause harm and would be worried by the idea he could have, if it was discussed with him. for someone who advocates conscious living he can be a bit live, laugh, love when it's something he wants to do and to be honest, there's a lot of childish delight at the idea of seeing the Antarctic that would probably enchant a lot of us given the opportunity. there are 200,000 people who visit Ushuaia every year, so there's clearly a market for it.
is it a reason to remember that Lewis, like everyone, isn't some sort of pure figure who can do no wrong? yeah. awhile ago I answered an ask that was something along the lines of 'how can you think Lewis is problematic' and it's like: because he's a Formula 1 driver. because he is a person who is honestly trying to do his best on a lot of things but who is still going to make mistakes. his ultimate priority remains driving a car faster than anyone else on 23 Sundays a year, not educating himself or other people in a mature and informed way and if you expect anything else from him you will be inevitably disappointed.
so: it's ok to be annoyed at him about this and still like or support him. it's ok to think he's the best F1 driver at advocating for things and also just a fucking idiot rich boy with zero thoughts in his brain sometimes. what Lewis has achieved and overcome isn't lessened or negated by the fact he did it while also being Just Some Guy Who Makes Bad Choices Because He Was Having Fun or whatever. blorbos are multifaceted and it's what makes them so incredibly tempting to like, put in a box and tell them no.
37 notes · View notes
thrumbolt · 1 year
Text
So, in November my girlfriend gifted my all the Dragon Age games because our DnD sessions were cancelled. 'Go date some elves there!' - and so I did. I went in completely blind, knew basically nothing about the series (except that you could date elves). So now, a month after finishing the last one, I feel my thoughts have rested enough to voice an opinion™. I'll drop my personal ratings here and elaborate under the cut.
Dragon Age: Origins 8/10
Dragon Age Awakening 6/10
Dragon Age 2 9/10
Dragon Age: Inquisition 4/10
Dragon Age: Trespasser 7/10
In short, I thought DA:O was pretty dope. Very solid adventure rpg fantasy dating sim. The characters are very fun and mostly lovable and the lore is interesting enough even if the art direction was pretty generic fantasy.
I was really surprised just how much they crammed into this game. The several different origins was a huge surprise and very nice incentive to replay the game, though so far I only played as a melf (mage elf). The storyline was engaging enough for me to follow and it makes you travel to all the different origin places, so everyone gets to connect with something in the main plot - smart!
I have to add however that I played as a male character - as I usually do - and I am very glad I did because despite the promise that men and women are equal (and the dominant religion being female centric) the writers did not really manage to capture that as it seems haha. I would've probably given the game a lower rating if I wouldn't have played as a dude as I'm a sensitive snowflake that way. And not even because of the rape as plot device or the brood mothers, but more the casual 'wow a woman with sword wow' stuff. I'll excuse it as 'it was a different time' kinda, but still would ruin my immersion.
Awakening I mention separately as it's kind of a sequel rather than just a DLC. I liked it. It's a nice extra adventure for your Warden character and the companions are very good (though I could've done without Oghren, sorry Oghren fans). I especially liked the Legion of the dead dwarf, she was adorable - and Anders, of course. You can give him a kitty!
So why am I rating it so low? They changed how shit works, don't tell you about it and it makes you miss half the game lol. Idk, it just pissed me off you had to click on background shit to talk to your companions and I didn't notice it until I was already halfway done. It's such a stupid idea, too. Click on this tree to talk to Nathaniel?? Weird tbh. It's especially bad for me, as I am not playing a lot of games (I am a filthy casual) and am not a completionist - also I already know who Andraste is, so why would I click her statue?
So yeah, that's my personal gripe with Awakening. At least it's short enough to replay, so hopefully I will catch all the stuff next time haha.
Dragon Age 2....ahh, I was very surprised to hear that it was so unpopular, several of my friends said they had not played it at all because they heard it was so bad. And I am very confused, because it is my favorite. I can see how it got flack for being on a smaller scale, the dungeons and areas repeat - but honestly, I didn't care much. I enjoyed the smaller scale and the more personal story greatly. I feel it makes more sense for a 'choice' based game anyway, as it lets you tell more stories without problems. And in this instance, a story about a refugee family and a bigger focus on social justice issues just vibed well with me. I can see how it's not everyone's cake I guess, but it's definitely worth playing! I think it has the best companions in all the games. They're all great fun and the dating options are amazing. I personally prefer when everyone is date-able by either gender - it makes me not having to worry and research ahead of time on what character to make (looking at you inquisition) and I can just headcanon for myself who is queer, straight, whatever. Yes, I might still be upset I wasn't able to date Alistair haha in DA:O.
I loved the 3 act structure and longer time period. I liked how people you meet/help in your side quests write you letters or get updates. I just loved how personal it was.
My only gripes with DA2 is the rushed Act 3 (can't even give everyone another gift ;_; ) and how the ending was handled. Chosing between templars and mages - sure, fun. But when you choose the mages, how come 80% of the people you are fighting are mages? Why is Orsino turning into an abomination and attacking *you*? It makes no sense. Poor Orsino. They did him dirty.
But otherwise I had great fun. Needless to say this game cemented my chantry hate lol. Doesn't help I live in a pretty gay oppressing catholic country now, but it felt fucking personal. I cheered when that fucking building blew up. It was cathartic. So I was hyped for the next game!
Which leads me to Inquisition. By the rating you can already see: I didn't like this game. For many reasons. The church dick riding was definitely one of them. But I mean, if you write it well I probably wouldn't have minded to get a different viewpoint (and there was still plenty of critical content in this game like with the former Inquisitor and all), sadly though, for me it didn't work in so many ways.
First of all I had to restart the game after 30 minutes because my girlfriend told me I can only date the elves if I'm a girl. Gee, good to know, or my tripple elf combo would've been ruined.
And I have to say: I liked how un-segregated the whole gender selection screen was. I got to make a pretty boyish looking twink even by choosing female, up to the point I was forgetting I was playing a girl until someone called me LADY Lavellan and ruined my immersion, so....props to that. I also liked the art design? Like all the little character cards, all the artworks just felt like they finally found their own style, kinda. (This was already started in DA2, which I really liked, I feel this series needs it's own, distinct look in some way, so it was nice to see they were trying to). Anyway, nice looks.
But the gameplay immediately felt weird and sluggish to me. It was way too hard even on the easiest setting. Enemies take FOREVER to die, even a stupid wolf or bear takes a gazillion hits. It wasn't fun. Not for me anyway, just tedious.
And the story....I just didn't feel it. It didn't help that you don't even have a proper origin (for a good while you have amnesia even). It made it difficult to even understand my own motivations imho. Playing it as an elf was definitely a bad choice as well, as this whole plot was clearly written with a human in mind. Pretty wild a DALISH elf is even an option. If they kept you as a prisoner, it would've made sense, maybe? But it just feels off to put this random Dalish immediately on top of your organization and calling them the herald of Andraste even though you keep insisting you don't even believe in that stuff haha. A wild ride indeed. Also I screamed at the whole 'Dalish only have 3 mages per clan and just YEET THE EXTRA CHILDREN INTO THE FOREST TO DIE' retcon. It absolutely makes zero sense with how the Dalish were described up to that point (as people who greatly care for their own and also really want to honor and learn about their roots. They know the elves were all originally magical. Why would they have a fucking mage limit. Why would they yeet a child out to die when they already suffer from diminishing numbers? What the FUCK Inquisition?).
The maps were too big, the game is sooo bloated and the main plot for the larger part completely disconnected from everything else (and also, pretty short in theory). Because of this, the pacing was kind of off. The war table....the WAR table. I did not like it. So many things that got shoved there should've been quests, while many of the actual quests should've just been deleted. And apparently my whole clan can just die in a small war table side thing and no one will care. lol
I also did not vibe with most of the companions that much. I liked Dorian a lot, but other than that most were just a lot of missed opportunities. Like, they were ok, but not as great as any of the other games.
Though I feel nothing quite shows the pacing issues of this game like Solas' romance haha. I still can't believe he breaks up with you immediately after kissing you and offering to take your vallaslin. It would've made so much more sense if he left during the ending party ceremony. What were they thinking?
Generally my issue was how a lot of characters just talk at you, not so much with you. You ask them questions, but they hardly ever ask you questions back, even though it would've been a great way to learn more about your characters backstory as well. I think Josephine was one of the only characters who ever asks how you're holding up. In the other games, it is way more interactive.
This resulted in me just never really connecting as much in Inquisition. Felt more like hanging with coworkers than friends. It was also weird how everyone acts like you're achieving great things, when really, none of it is something you do. The inquisition itself, the army, it already exists. Solas literally just points at Skyhold (you do not even have to fight anything to get it) and so on.
I hated that you have an animated main plot cut scene where your Dalish elf asks a human who Mythal is. And of course I really disliked how the mage rebellion was handled. Why do I have to choose between templars and mages AGAIN when, in this game at least, being able to recruit both would've kinda made more sense? Unite against a bigger enemy, bla. I wouldn't have super liked it as a resolution for the mage oppression issue, but at least it would've given that conflict SOME form of resolution.
So yeah. Did not enjoy it that much. Was very surprised to learn how many did and that it won game of the year. Maybe it would've been more enjoyable just on its own, without context, but coming in right after DA2 it was quite the clash in my opinion.
There was definitely potential for a good game. It had good elements. I think they fixed a bunch of issues in Trespasser, which I quite enjoyed. But I kind of am not looking AS much forward to the 4th installment. I'll play it for sure, but I feel the writers just want to do something different with this series than what I enjoy about it.
Overall though I still had great fun! I like Dragon Age. Seeing everyone's oc's is so cute and I will definitely keep on enjoying that no matter what.
25 notes · View notes
wanderintofics · 11 months
Note
Angst seems to be your specialty. I have a hard time doing it myself, but i’d love to hear your elaboration and thoughts on Bruce’s depression.
:) hope you are doing well
hm, i'm probably gonna end up adding to this later cause it requires more thought and research but for the moment
Bruce and depression is interesting because he's such an old character that he was made in a time where depression wasn't really acknowledged yet so the earliest iterations of his character, while often sad and deep in thought, weren't as explicitly depressed. then he was revamped for a more kid friendly audience and got goofy. that being said i think it's always been at least a little bit in the character. you can argue he was always a film noir character and everyone in that genre is depressed whether the people of the time knew about it or not but like, i'm not a film critic i don't know how to make that argument.
i think Batman goes through high and low periods (like any person really) but so long as he's motivated by something or has a goal he's able to successfully combat it. or more accurately, run away from it, distract himself from it long enough to get the job done. it's in the moments he slows down that it creeps up on him and ESPECIALLY whenever he's alone.
the unmotivated aspects of depression come out most in regards to his health, in depressive episodes he can only force himself to do so many things and he chooses the mission so things like eating and sleeping and shaving get tossed to the side. essentially running on low power. it's hard to spot if you don't know him because Bruce is always a little hyper-fixated on something but when it genuinely a low period he stops reaching out to people, get's tired and quiet in a way that immediately makes the people who know him best alarmed.
on an extremely surface level it seems like he doesn't get depressed but that's because he's sacrificing his social life, his relationships, and his health a) regularly so who'd be able to tell the difference and b) you can only tell if you are close to him and have seen him while in a high period where he genuinely reaches out and has the energy to make a greater effort
i might have said a bit about this in a previous ask but a depressed Bruce is easier to care for than an injured Bruce because while he's withdrawn he's not nearly as defensive, he doesn't reach out but he's willing to let someone get closer (so long as they don't yell at him or call him lazy for not taking care of himself) so long as they are careful and slow about it.
his depression is brought on by circumstance and a feeling of failure and inadequacy more than biological miswiring (my fucking beloathed) and so the people around him can get pretty good at predicting when a low period is going to hit. (unless we go into the bipolar headcannon a couple of really good fics gave me and that's a whole other discussion)
Grief and misery aren't the same as depression and he reacts a little differently, grief gets expressed as anger and then an implosion of tears and in misery he has to sulk by himself and remember how bad he is at being alone before letting Alfred or Clark or his kids come in and drag him out of it.
14 notes · View notes
nokingsonlyfooles · 6 months
Text
Reefer Madness Lives
This is not such a hot paper, and the peer review process where it was published is not so hot either. Peer review in general is... Let's be charitable and say it's more for money and prestige than scientific rigor. But, just for basic integrity, you need to operate with a double-blind. CMAJ is single-blind, so their reviewers know if they're up against anyone famous or well-connected who might bring them a lot of attention. And their primary criteria is "importance and novelty." Less delicately, if it looks like it will get a lot of clicks and cites, they'll be pleased to publish it. This is not all that out-of-the-ordinary for science journals, and that's kinda bad.
But a paper saying that pot is gonna poison your children and give people schizophrenia will get a shitton of clicks and cites. It's the number one trending story on CBC right now! And there are live comments!
I need CBD and THC to deal with my PTSD and sleep problems. It's possible that, after being under-treated for decades, I will eventually deal with my underlying health issues enough to sleep unassisted, but I ain't there yet. And ya know what makes it really hard to make it to go to doctor's appointments and get care? Not being able to sleep!
I had a medical marijuana card before, and I could probably qualify for one again if I had to. But A) Do you really want me taking up a doctor's time for this when there aren't enough doctors for everyone right now? and B) Legalized recreational use keeps availability convenient, variety and quality-control reasonable, and prices low. If you are going to inflict capitalism on me, don't kneecap what little benefit a free market is able to provide.
Now, we don't want to get people high without their consent, and children cannot consent to getting high (although some of them do need cannabis products for medical reasons), so for fuck's sake store your shit carefully if you've got kids. But "cannabis poisoning" as they put it, means, "I feel awful and maybe I threw up but I won't die, even if I'm super paranoid and feel like I might." Most people who wind up in the hospital are adults screwing around with edibles who don't know what to expect, and all they need is a nice, patient friend who'll tell them they're fine. This "poison" doesn't kill people. Unlike, say, antifreeze, or children's Tylenol. (Although, I hear Willie Nelson's friend had a bale of pot fall on him one time, so it's not as safe as they say!)
And the schizophrenia thing... People with mental health issues self-select for these studies by choosing to self-medicate. You might also say cannabis use has a strong correlation with PTSD flashbacks - because people with PTSD know it helps and they freaking well try it, and sometimes they still have flashbacks. A psychedelic is not the best choice for schizophrenia, god no, but if you're having associated depression and sleep issues and you haven't been diagnosed yet, you might give it a try. Better mental healthcare and better, earlier diagnoses and treatment will address this issue more effectively than yet another moral panic.
But a certain portion of the population is really invested in "drugs are bad" and "drug users are addicts and addicts are bad" narrative. Like, literally invested. It keeps them in political power and gets money for studies like this and "public health" campaigns that are really thinly-veiled, outdated DARE propaganda.
Even this study, which specifically excluded medical marijuana use, found social benefits to not criminalizing drug use and drug users. No shit. People don't get addicted to something because addiction is fun; they have severe, unaddressed problems and they're doing whatever they can to cope with them, whether that's staying stoned all the time or blowing their retirement fund on Funko Pops. And most people who use drugs don't get addicted. (Also most people who buy Funko Pops, one assumes.) Removing them from society and giving them all criminal records doesn't help anyone.
Harm reduction should be the goal here, as in most things. You will never get it perfect, but you need to take steps towards improving the general situation as much as possible. Sending the War on Drugs (really, the War on Your Own Population) into extra innings after decades of failure is... Ha-ha, well, it's self-destructive addict behaviour, y'all. Maybe you could use some social services to help you deal with your problems in a better way.
5 notes · View notes
scripted-downfall · 10 months
Note
I never did understand that mentality. "Oh, this person doesn't like J*red? Well, let's threaten and throw slurs at this person! That'll make them like him! 😄"
Like, no. That's not how that works.
Also, for a while, I used to have nothing against Jared. No, I wasn't a Stan, but I didn't hate him either. I thought he was a pretty alright dude. And I kinda bought into the whole J2 thing for a while too. Until I started hearing about this shit about him. And at first, I didn't think much of it, it was one story here, one story there, but then it kept. Happening. And then I saw the receipts. And I rewatched convention clips, and this was the turning point for me. It surprises me there's no one talking about this anywhere else. Not Twitter and not Facebook. Or maybe there are, it's just not tagged or trending, which it should be. People need to know about this.
- ʀᴀᴍʙʟɪɴɢ ᴀɴᴏɴ (•‿•)
Exactly! It makes no sense in my mind at all.
For context: I also didn't feel especially strongly about JarPad at first. I saw him in the context of the show and found his acting utterly atrocious --- it became a long-running joke in my family and friend base --- but I didn't really care much about him. As I mentioned, I don't look much at bts stuff anyway. This was then followed by a few of my Sam-critical and JarPad-acting-critical posts, which got me slammed by stans so vehemently that my inbox was full of little else for about a week. (I never really mute posts or block people --- perhaps I should, but I never feel the need --- but I muted a few posts and blocked a few folks during that first wave of b.s. I can't bring myself to regret it, either.) After that point, I got even more suspicious of JarPad's character --- I mean, if a man inspires a fanbase like that (heavy on the bad extremes, light on the moderates, and with a hefty dose of threats), something questionable is probably going on. And then I looked through Tumblr and saw posts about him doxxing service workers, treating people like shit in general, the tattoo debacle, et cetera, and I saw his temper tantrum about The Winchesters, and I just lost any and all respect for the man. (And then his stans had the nerve to be like: "well, it's clear you're just jealous or something, since you clearly spend all your time thinking about him" and I'm just sitting there. Like. Wot??!? I honestly do not think of the man unless I'm watching SPN and dying because of his acting, or if someone brings him up.)
I definitely follow what you're describing though. That's probably the path I would have taken if the stans didn't chuck me into the deep-end of antiJarPad, and I think it's admirable that you paid attention to all the warning signs. (A lot of people I know have... not.) I also very much agree that this information should be wider-spread than it is... I only know what's going on because of Tumblr --- though, I confess, I don't have any other social media (is Tumblr even social media? I don't think so, tbh, but anyway) so I wouldn't know if there's much on there --- and it took some conscious research to find/verify even then.
Thank you for the ask! (Stans dni)
13 notes · View notes
andreabanai · 2 years
Text
Adrienn Banai: The Rat Lover
I didn't want to post about any of this, but this person forced my hand.
I can't let this person run around on this hellsite anymore.
For those not in the know, this person harasses artists into drawing their husbando: a rat character named "Grey" from the children's series "Larva Island". They also force people to draw Grey's grandpa, a female version of Grey named "Greyless", Grey wearing Roxanne's dress from "A Goofy Movie", and plenty of parodies of the opening scene of said movie. Like, they subjected one person to draw that same sequence with different characters like 6-7 times. And the "best" part? They steal the poor victim's art to claim it as their own. And sometimes, they create edits of them WITHOUT CREDITING THE ORIGINAL ARTISTS.
Tumblr media
Her husbando
And I was one of their unfortunate victims. This person is weird as all hell; they ship this rat with Pibby (a character that is canonically from a preschool show), Meilin Lee (A hecking 13 year old girl), and Adrienn themselves. The fandoms they follow are: -Courage the Cowardly Dog -Friday Night Funkin -Learning with Pibby
Turning Red, anything Disney related (Goofy mostly), Steven Universe, Made in Abyss and, most importantly, Larva.
Tumblr media Tumblr media
adrienn, flat out admitting that they steal art from people
It's already kind of weird enough, but then I did more digging on this person. They have a butt ton of accounts on a multitude of social media websites. They have a few on reddit, a few on wikia, one on vimeo, and one on behance, of all places. They have a long history of harassing users, especially on reddit and wikia. They have the most accounts on Tumblr, with five (two of them are inactive.) The second biggest is wikia, with four. Oh, but it gets better. They have uncensored nsfw content on two tumblrs. This is from one of their accounts. I am not going to show you the image, but I'm going to show you the tags:
Tumblr media Tumblr media
I mean, I'm glad that they tagged it as "rule 34", but I'm more surprised about how tumblr didn't purge those posts or ban the user entirely. So, if you see someone with any of these accounts ask you to draw this rat, dump the ask and block em. Hell, even report them if you need to : https://adrienn-banai-09.tumblr.com/ (WARNING, NSFW CONTENT AHEAD) https://adriennbanai09.tumblr.com/ (Not as nsfw as the one above, but still, nsfw) https://andreabanai.tumblr.com/ https://adriennsposts.tumblr.com/ https://adriennbanai-09.tumblr.com/
And Adrienn/Andrea, if you are reading this, I urge you to take a break from the internet and get some help. As I said multiple times, this behavior will not help you make friends. It will only make more enemies. I am an autistic just like you (probably. idk) and I really don't want to put you down like this, but you're already weirding a bunch of people out. Though you probably won't listen to me anyway, since apparently in your eyes the word "no" is just an unspoken "yes". And please don't harass this person or send them death threats. Doing that just makes you a bad person.
I hope this is the last time I talk about this person, because I don't really have the time or the patience to deal with stupid bullcrap like this.
Thank you for coming to my TED talk. The clorox brain bleach is on the right side of the exits.
Tumblr media
I'll answer your questions, because I have done more research. (that other devianart account gave me way more information than I have ever needed. my poor eyes...)
Is it a fetish? The Goofy Nightmare stuff probably. Mostly because it involves transformation. They're also obsessed with body horror and gore, as well as some other stuff that tumblr would probably throw the ban hammer at. (Please don't make me explain that stuff. It's creepy as all hell.) The rat isn't the only character they're obsessed with. They're also obsessed with the Cat Thieves from Courage and Roxanne from "A Goofy Movie".
And is it a language barrier thing or they just don't care? It's both. English is not their first language, obviously. I'm guessing they might also be autistic, which, after looking through their deviantart accounts, seems to be the case.
23 notes · View notes
souryogurt64 · 2 years
Note
Wait, if the girl in gray isn't ashlee, can I have more context on pete and ashlee's relationship? I always assumed he left *her*
emodiedin2009 would probably be better to ask, there are also more Ashlee stans in bandom now than I have ever personally witnessed due to the Y2K renaissance
I honestly don't know that much about Ashlee Simpson in terms of Pete Wentz research, but its because her weird father freaks me the hell out. The book does not touch on it at all and Pete's journals got progressively messier around then, too. I know she was an alcoholic. He talks about it in depth both times he went on Howard Stern and a bit on Playboy. The split has always been described as amicable even though it was kinda bad at first and they ended up settling it themselves after trying to go to court and they're friends now. Ashlee's husband talks very highly of Pete which I think throws everyone for a loop when they hear it.
Even though it ended mutual, it's always been described as her leaving him. They did not officially date for very long at all and were on and off for about a year and a half. She did give birth pretty quickly after the wedding which makes a lot of people wonder if that had something to do with it, but they were at least engaged when they got pregnant. Pete was really obsessed with her before they ever met and she was his celebrity crush; he had a Blender magazine she was in that he jerked off to.
Today Magazine did a really interesting timeline of their relationship (as shown by the tabloids, anyway). There was like a bunch of stuff Pete did because he generally treats women in his life pretty awfully. There was the stripper photograph incident, and it was reported that Ashlee caught him cheating on her in 2009. I would absolutely believe the cheating thing, all of his other exes except Michelle (she has too much class to talk about him lol) described him as a serial cheater and he portrays his character that way in the book. Someone told me once Ashlee has a song about him yelling and throwing things which is also very in character for him.
Ashlee got wasted and tried to start a fight with one of Pete's exes at one point, they got in some screaming fight at Pete's bar, etc. They'd do things like make out onstage or be excessive on social media if tabloids started reporting they were fighting. They would also talk about their sex life in public all the time; Pete gets a lot of heat for the Howard Stern interview but they were like that all the time.
Pete said the reason why she left him was that they grew apart and also because he got extremely depressed over the hiatus and stopped taking care of himself and grew a disgusting beard. Pete has a tendency to very skillfully deflect attention away from when he talks about his mental health by making himself a clown which is what he does there.
In Playboy he mentions this story about how Ashlee went to bed at like 7 to do yoga in the morning and then he would take Ambien and go to bed at like 2am and he almost burned the house down because he was hallucinating and I just think it's a really good example of how they just weren't a good match, and to be blunt I don't think Ashlee was fully aware of the extent of his issues nor was she equipped to deal with them.
I wrote this for the Pete/Ryan essay but I think I'm gonna pull it from the final draft because its sitting at 19 pages without it and I don't think its that relevant and I didn't want it to devolve into more of an insane unhinged gay truther conspiracy than it already is lol but this might give you more context
Later, in 2008, after being asked by Howard Stern if he ever thought he was gay, Wentz would say, “I think that it was…it was a little bit of a shock kind of thing, the way Bowie and Jagger kind of did it. It was kind of like, people are so intimidated and weirded out by this, I’m gonna just freak people out with it. But at the same time, I always wanted everyone to know the equipment down there always seemed a little weird to me.” This interview with Howard Stern predominantly concerned bad-boy Wentz’s new marriage with pop star Ashlee Simpson, and the birth of their son; Wentz’s music career was an afterthought. 
Simpson was born to a Baptist family in Waco, Texas, and religion played a role in the branding of her and her sister’s careers. Simpson was managed by her father, Joe Simpson, a former Baptist minister. Ashlee Simpson’s sister, Jessica Simpson, famously remained a virgin until marriage after receiving a purity ring from her father at age 12, though Ashlee did not do the same. Simpson’s breakout role was on 7th Heaven, and she appeared in forty episodes; the show has been described as “Christian propaganda,” “not-so sneakily [espousing] conservative values,” and “heavy-handed moralizing.” 
None of this information is intended to serve as an indictment of Simpson or insinuate anything about her personal beliefs; it is present in this essay to provide context for Wentz’s comment downplaying his sexuality on the Stern interview, which was undoubtedly conducted with his wife’s professional image in mind; her public image was rather different than that of Wentz, who was often portrayed in 00s headlines as an insane, suicidal, pill popping, sexed up, gay narcissist. In fact, Wentz and Simpson were outspoken supporters of overturning Prop 8; in 2019, Simpson described gay fans as her ”faves…Yaas, queen.” Anyway, to finish up this tangent, Stern would bring on a male caller to tell Wentz he masturbated to photos of him and request he remove clothing; the hosts would also joke about the caller “raping [Wentz]”. I have been unable to locate any instance of Wentz publicly discussing his sexuality following the 2008 Stern interview.
28 notes · View notes
werewolfetone · 1 year
Note
you asked for specific questions so: how exactly was coleridge’s addiction?
Ah, Coleridge's addictions. Okay.
First of all, he definitely had more than one. There was the opium, of course, which he typically took dissolved in brandy as laudanum rather than smoking it. On top of drinking a great amount of brandy whenever he took opium, he also drank heavily without any opium, leading to alcoholism on top of the opium addiction.
The timing of his addiction is something a lot of people get wrong, in my opinion, because a lot of sources will act like he was an addict for his entire adult life--which he wasn't. He did take opium throughout his life, including when he was a child (we have evidence, for instance, of what was perhaps his first experience with it, when he was in secondary school and he caught a bad cold after jumping in a river fully clothed in a fit of his typical Dramatics), but he really started taking it in a way that wasn't just as a painkiller after a period of a long flare up of what was likely a chronic problem (that is its own can of worms, trust me) in 1802. Due to the fact that opium was really the only painkiller they had plus a treatment for a lot of various ailments that it probably shouldn't have been prescribed for, he began to take a lot more of it than ever before during that illness, and combined with depression due to his obsessive love for Wordsworth's sister-in-law. He then wrestled with the problem pretty much untreated for the next fourteen or so years, with it causing various problems in his personal and social life, as well as being either a cause or a symptom of his fluctuating depression. In 1816, after several failed attempts at finding doctors to treat his addictions in a time that didn't understand the problem, Coleridge put himself under the care of James Gillman, who I have written a post about here, and who was on the cutting edge of research into addiction. The problem continued for the rest of his life, though he got a lot better with Gillman's support and it was really only from about 1802-1816 that he was at his worst with the addiction.
In terms of why he took opium and drank, mostly it was as a way of self-medicating. Coleridge definitely suffered from absolutely terrible mental health, which usually manifested in obsessive attachments to people that often blurred the lines between platonic and romantic, depression that fluctuated depending on his outside circumstances, difficulty with finishing projects, and occasional hallucinations and delusions, and he had no way to treat any of it due to the fact that the people of the time didn't understand mental illness. He also suffered, as I mentioned, from some kind of probable chronic illness that might have been due to sleeping over night in a field as a child and that caused him immense pain, and he didn't have real way to treat that either. So he took to taking opium as a catch-all cure, which led to his alcohol dependency as well.
That's a pretty quick overview of it, and there's definitely some things I've left out--the ups and downs of the years when his addiction was very bad, or the ways his friends tried to support him but unfortunately for the most part did not do a very good job--but in terms of just a quick guide to how it was with him specifically, I think I've covered most of the bases here. One more side note that I wanted to add, also, is that when you're reading about Coleridge, if you notice an author being ableist about his addictions, the book probably isn't going to be the best. Both because ableism is bad, but also because in my experience, authors being ableist about his addictions usually don't make the biggest effort to be unbiased. Obviously no historian is unbiased, but if they're going the "Coleridge was a horrible terrible person due to his addictions" route they usually don't even make an effort.
3 notes · View notes