#like sometimes it feels like no one wants to talk to me voluntarily

[bellaveux]

more fuckgirl!wanda x reader , can we have wanda show her protective dom side

OFF LIMITS | wanda maximoff x fem!reader

summary: wanda hates the way everyone is ogling at you, and makes sure to remind everyone that you are, very much, off limits.

content warnings: minors dni please. college au!, fuckgirl!sorority president!wanda, dom!wanda, jealousy, possessiveness, bottom!reader, smut! – mirror sex, semi-public sex, overstimulation, fingering, marking/hickeys

word count: 3.28k

note. writing feels kinda all over the place am sorry,, i went both protective and possessive (they sometimes confuse me while writing loool) but i hope u enjoy it and ty for request!

Wanda was both a woman of contradictions and a force to be reckoned with. On one hand, she was a disciplined and hard-working leader, respected by her peers and admired for her dedication to the sorority. On the other, she was a party animal, a woman who loved nothing more than to let loose, have a good time, and charm women left and right. No doubt was she popular, with everyone from the freshmen to the seniors looking up to her as a role model. Her energy was infectious, and her spirit was unstoppable, as she flitted from one party to another, always with a smile on her face and a drink in her hand.

And her game was undoubtedly unmatched. With the tiniest twinkle in her eye and a sultry smile on her lips, Wanda could make even the most stoic person melt with desire. She was the object of desire for many who crossed her path, making her popularity with everyone on campus legendary, people drawn to her like a magnet. Enjoying the game of love, teasing and tempting those around her, she loved the attention, and always knew how to charm and seduce with ease. Her flirtatious nature was a part of her, an extension of her personality, and it was something that she enjoyed using to her advantage. It was a game that she played with finesse and skill, a dance of words and gestures that left those around her breathless and wanting more.

But while others voluntarily gave her attention, there was only one person she wanted, and that was you.

You and Wanda always had an undeniable attraction towards each other, a magnetic force that seemed to draw you together, no matter how hard you tried to resist. There was a tension between you two, a spark that ignited every time you were in the same room, eyes locking, and bodies leaning in closer. It was as if you shared a secret language, a hidden connection that only you and her could understand, and that seemed to grow stronger with every passing day. And yet, despite your chemistry, you were not together, and it seemed as if you would never be. Much to Wanda’s disappointment, you have always rejected her pursuits and advances. Unlike her, you valued the time you spend with another person, wanting more than to be a fling. You wanted love from someone who adored you, someone who made you feel special, and initially, you didn’t think Wanda could be that person.

Wanda stood at the edge of the crowded sorority party, drink in her hand, eyes fixed on you. The room was alive with music and chatter, but for Wanda, it all faded away into the background as she watched as you entered the room, greeting everyone who came up to you with such gracefulness. Wanda always knew you liked to look good, but God, why did you have to wear something as sexy as that? The black dress hugged your curves in all the right places, the skin on your back completely exposed for everyone to see. Wanda was entranced, her heart beating faster as she felt the pull of attraction towards you. She tried to look away, to focus on something else, maybe on the girls who were already talking to her, but no one could compete with you, the woman who had captured her attention completely, dependably each and every time. Wanda couldn't help but admire the way you moved in that dress, with a grace and poise that seemed effortless. And as your eyes met across the crowded room, Wanda felt a jolt of electricity shoot through her body just right before you smirked and turned away from her, returning to your friends.

And so, she watched you all night, unable to focus on the rest of the people around her, who wanted her attention. She was too captivated by you, like she was under a spell, and couldn’t do anything else but stare.

Soon, she noticed that she wasn’t the only one who saw you. Of course, she wasn’t. Everywhere you walked, between the sea of people, heads turned and eyes followed, as the other people in the party looked on in awe and admiration. Your beauty was almost surreal, a dream-like quality that made you seem like you were from another world entirely. You, like her, were popular in the way that everyone on campus wanted to be with, but no one could quite capture. And Wanda wanted to have the honor.

She watched as all sorts of people came up to you, asking to dance, for your number, and introducing themselves like they even had a chance. As the seconds passed, Wanda’s jealousy grew. You would throw that pretty smile of yours their way as you politely rejected them. Some of them would even become quite touchy with you, and Wanda hated being the one to watch on the sidelines. She wanted everyone to back off, tell everyone that you were hers, a territory no one shall trespass.

And when you allowed a bubbly freshman, dressed in an all black suit, named Kate, to stay a little longer than Wanda would’ve liked, touching you softly down your back as you spoke and drank from the cup she had gotten you, Wanda decided to take action.

“Don’t touch her,” Wanda said firmly as she stood closely behind you, watching the younger woman immediately pull her hand back off of you.

“Wanda,” you warned, glancing up at her, cautiously eyeing her with your sly eyes for her next move.

Kate watched the interaction carefully, seemingly finding it hard to butt in under the sudden tension that Wanda had brought along with her, “S-Sorry… Hi, I’m Kate.”

Wanda said nothing, and instead, she threw a tiny, bitter smile at her before turning back to you, her hand slowly creeping up your waist. You did little to stop her touch, and if anything, you found yourself leaning closer. It never surprised you how good Wanda was at being territorial and overprotective she was when it came to you, and under your facade, you found it attractive.

“Do you think I could steal you away for just a second?” Wanda whispered into your ear, but loud enough for Kate to catch.

You put your cup down against the counter of the bar and smiled artfully, shaking your head at her, “Uh, actually, Kate and I were having a conversation here, so I really don’t think you can.”

Wanda hummed in annoyance, taking a moment to glare at you as you turned back to the other woman. She felt a pang of jealousy in her chest, watching you and this Kate interact as if she wasn’t even there, and she wanted nothing more than to drag you away from her and all the lingering eyes that were currently still on you. At this point, her blood boiled at every little thing everyone did around you.

“Kate,” Wanda tried again, more firmly this time, as if steam was coming from her ears, face almost red with anger. “Do you mind?”

“Oh, uh, yeah, no— of course,” she laughed awkwardly, backing up as slowly as if she had just angered a lion.

And so, Kate left, much to Wanda’s satisfaction, but it did much to fuel your irritation towards Wanda’s actions. And right when she left, another person came up, as if they were in line to talk to you, but instead, Wanda shot them a deathly glare, and they immediately backed off.

You sighed and turned towards the counter, rubbing your temples without even looking at her, “What is wrong with you?”

“I just did you a favor,” Wanda scoffed and folded her arms as you moved away from her. “She wouldn’t be enough to satisfy you, (y/n).”

“Why is sex the only thing on your mind, Wanda? I was just talking to her. Like a normal person,” you tell her, rolling your eyes.

“Oh, come on, you and I both know what she was doing,” she said. “She was all over you.”

She couldn't help but feel possessive over you, and the thought of anyone else touching you or even flirting with you was enough to make her feel sick to her stomach.

And finally, you turned to her and smirked, your chin in the palm of your hands as you looked up at her through your eyelashes, “Mm, and why is that so important to you?”

“You know why.”

You, in fact, did know why. After all the times Wanda has chased after you, trying desperately to get you to accept her advances, you never did, not wanting to be a part of her seemingly long list of women that she played with. No, initially, you decided you’d do the playing, teasing her without any further intentions afterwards, and it only made her want you more. But at this point, you longed for Wanda’s touch, despite how infuriating she can be at times. The undeniable attraction you had towards each other tied you together, and Wanda only wanted you all to herself.

You shook your head once more and stepped forward, bringing your hand up to flatten out her collar neatly, “It’s kinda cute when you’re jealous.”

Wanda said nothing to deny that and instead, she clenched her jaw while savoring your touch, feeling the tips of your fingers graze her neck softly.

She stood close, her heart pounding in her chest as she tried to keep her cool. But you were teasing her with the way you stepped forward, looking up at her with those pretty eyes in a way that made Wanda's frustration grow with each passing moment. It was maddening, the way you played with her, toying with her emotions. Wanda felt a surge of anger rising within her, a fire that threatened to consume her if she didn't do something about it. She tried to maintain her composure, to keep a cool head, but it was no use. Everything you did and said was like a knife, cutting deep into Wanda's heart and making her ache with desire.

Ultimately, unable to take it any longer, she grabbed your wrist and dragged away from the bar, away from every single person who eyed you, through the crowd and into the hallways where she pulled you into one of the many bathrooms in the whole building.

Wanda wrapped her arms around your waist, her front pressed up against your back, holding you close with her lips barely grazing the skin of your neck and her hands running down the sides of your dress. This damn dress. The way it clung to the curves of your body, the fabric draped in such a way that showcased your back, revealing just enough to keep her wanting more. The sight of your bare skin was tantalizing, and Wanda felt a flutter in her chest as she pressed up against you.

“I don’t like the way they keep staring at you,” Wanda confessed as you watched her slowly pepper soft kisses down your neck to your shoulder through the reflection of the mirror.

Your eyelids fluttered closed, reveling in the softness of her lips against your skin, “What are you going to do about it?”

And you felt it — a smirk against your shoulder, making you realize what you had suddenly gotten yourself into. Wanda squeezed your hips with her hands, proudly looking at you through the mirror as if she were savoring the moment she now had you all to herself, in her arms, in her hands.

“I’m gonna remind them that you’re off limits.”

Surprisingly, Wanda was being so gentle, kissing and sucking at your skin softly, marking you, littering plenty of hickeys down your neck and shoulder, and you watched her do it in the mirror. You watched when one of her hands would travel up from your waist to wrap her palm around the swell of your breasts, fondling them eagerly, making you hum a moan in satisfaction. Her other hand found its way down to your thighs, moving slowly under your dress. You couldn’t help but watch again, the sight in the mirror almost making your knees give out, as Wanda moved the hand that was on your breast down to the hem of your dress, bunching up the fabric to pull it up your thighs.

Her fingers finally traced the hem of your panties as she watched your face carefully in the reflection. You looked so pretty like this, practically melting in her arms, lips parted with your eyes closed, as she played with you. After a second of admiring the way you looked, Wanda brought a hand up to grab your jaw, turning your head towards her, before leaning into you for a sloppy kiss, opening your mouth as she pressed a finger to your clothed clit. You moaned into her mouth, giving her perfect chance to slide her tongue into yours, immediately falling in love with the way you tasted. Oh, Wanda just couldn’t wait to have her way with you.

“You’re so wet for me already,” she whispered in your ear, fingers still playing over your clothed sex. “I’ve barely touched you yet.”

“Wanda,” you breathed, eyes closed as you laid your head back against her shoulder.

“No, baby, open your eyes,” she smiled into your cheek as you followed her instructions. “I want you to watch when I fuck you.”

You didn’t know how your knees didn’t just give out the moment she said those words. Not wanting to disappoint, you made sure to keep your eyes open as best you could, watching how her hands moved underneath the fabric of your dress. When you finally feel her fingers slipping into your panties, Wanda moans against your shoulder, her eyes rolling back as she feels the wetness of your pussy. You were practically dripping.

Without wasting another second, Wanda pushed two fingers into you with ease. You moaned softly, immediately clenching around her as she curled her fingers into you, pressing against the sweet spot in your pussy, which she seemed to have no trouble finding.

“You can do better than that, baby,” Wanda whispered, fingers suddenly pumping in and out of you at a brutal pace. “I want everyone to know you’re mine.”

“Mmh–W-Wanda,” you moaned out, holding on to her wrist as she fingered you. “Oh, fuck!”

Her second hand was brought into play shortly after, using it to rub your clit roughly, making you jolt against her, legs shaking, and your slick slowly traveling down your thighs. The sight of you writhing against her in the reflection was almost too hot for you to look at, always turning your head away, only for Wanda to grab your jaw and turn you back to face the mirror. You were tight around her fingers, and Wanda couldn’t help but groan at the fact, staring at you through the mirror as you came undone on her fingers.

You shook erratically as you came, unable to think about anything else but the orgasm she had just given you. That was until you felt her pushing in a third finger into your leaking hole without any warning. You tried to push against her, to ask her to give you a second, but something about the way her eyes looked in the mirror as she stared at you gave you a feeling that she would just keep doing whatever she pleased.

So, you let her, no matter how sensitive you were.

“That’s it, baby,” she groaned. “Being such a good girl for me.”

“Please, please—“ you whined, not sure if you were begging for more or begging her to stop.

The stretch of her three fingers was enough to make you chant her name like a prayer as she fucked you through your first orgasm. She was knuckles deep into your squelching pussy, curling them in a rhythmic pattern against your sweet spot, and it made you wonder how you were still standing. Her fingers piston in and out of you, bringing you to the edge for the second time tonight, making your bones feel like jelly. And finally, you arch your back against her, coming right on her fingers once again, screaming her name out without a care in the world, knowing everyone outside the door must’ve heard you.

But Wanda kept going. She continued to finger you, lost in thought after watching you come twice in the mirror, your cunt gushing so loudly, it’s embarrassing.

“Look how pretty you are, (y/n),” she cooed, using her other hand to grope your tits.

“I- I can’t, Wanda, p-please—“ you whined, gripping onto her tightly, unable to watch yourself through the mirror anymore. “T-Too much, please!”

“But you're so pretty when you beg. Why wouldn't I just keep going and going and... going?”

And so, she does. She fucks you until you can barely stand anymore, when your knees buckle, and she has to hold you up with one arm around your waist and even then, she still keeps going, and you’re sobbing at the overstimulation. You almost nearly fall and curl in on yourself, but Wanda made sure to keep you steady, bringing you to the edge another time, and another… and another.

By the end of it, you laid back against her, holding you up completely as your legs have given out. Your eyes were heavy, threatening to close as Wanda soothed out your dress with one hand, kissing you softly down your neck again, this time over the prettiest purple bruises that littered all over your skin. Her lips were warm, soft, and settling as she kissed you. She took in the sight of you with her eyes locked onto you through the mirror; you had your eyes closed, heavily exhaling, hair ruffled and messy, and yet, you looked like the prettiest mess ever. Her pretty girl.

“You’re so perfect,” Wanda whispered lovingly into your ear, her breath ticking your skin. “I don’t like having to fight for your attention.”

The way she said that last sentence was kind of sad, in the way that it hurt her feelings, and you could only hum in response as you slowly but surely regained your composure, shifting slightly in Wanda’s arms. You always knew Wanda was the jealous type, maybe overly jealous, but you found it endearing how she endlessly chased after you, how she still wanted you after tonight.

“You really don’t even have to, Wanda,” you tell her softly, trying to stand upright, wobbling slightly as you did so, to turn and cup her face with your hands. “You know everything I do is so that you can keep your eyes on me.”

“It works every time.”

You chuckle softly, pressing a kiss to her lips, melting when she smiled into it, “That’s why I do it.”

Wanda took a moment to look at you after you pulled away from her lips. Your lipstick was smudged, spreading slightly down under your bottom lip sexily, making Wanda want nothing more than to kiss you again. And nothing was stopping her, so she did. She was happy, finally being able to have you like she had always wanted and knowing the fact that when you walk out of this bathroom, everyone will see all the marks and bruises Wanda left on you. Because of it, she felt a surge of satisfaction as she pulled you close, determined to show everyone outside just who you belonged to.

That way no one would even dare to try to take her woman again tonight, reminding them that you were hers, and hers alone.

— navigation!

#bellaveux writes! #wanda maximoff x reader #wanda maximoff #wanda maximoff fanfiction #marvel x reader #elizabeth olsen #the scarlet witch #scarlet witch #marvel #elizabeth olsen x reader #wanda x reader #avengers #avengers x reader

[togrowoldinv]

Home Again

Natasha Romanoff x Reader

When Natasha gets home from a mission she needs reassurance that she can relax and trust herself around you again

Note: Some soft Nat for y’all. Enjoy!

Natasha Masterlist 1, Natasha Masterlist 2, Natasha Masterlist 3, Main Masterlist

It’s late in the night when you feel the bed dip next to you. She’s been gone on a mission for almost two months. Now she’s finally home.

“Natasha?” You ask, your voice no louder than a whisper.

“Yeah, it’s me,” she replies. You can hear the exhaustion in her voice. “Go back to sleep. It’s late.”

You roll over and go back to sleep. The next morning when you wake Nat is already up and going. You’re not sure she really ever slept.

After getting dressed, you walk to the kitchen to find her standing at the counter with a cup of coffee.

“Good morning,” you greet her. You go to kiss her cheek and she turns her head at the same time so you accidentally kiss her lips.

“Oh, I’m sorry,” Nat says a little shyly.

“That’s alright,” you say with a smile on your face. You kiss her lips properly this time. It’s quick as not to cross any boundaries. “I missed you.”

“I missed you too, y/n,” Nat admits.

“How was the mission?” You ask as you pour your own cup of coffee.

Natasha hesitates before answering. You know she doesn’t want to relive it.

“It was okay,” she says. Nat shrugs and sets her coffee on the island. “I think I’m going to go for a run.”

“If you’re sure you’re okay,” you reply.

“Physically, yes I’m okay,” Nat answers. That’s what you needed to know. “I’ll be back, okay?”

“Okay, babe. Be safe,” you tell her.

“I always am.”

And with that Natasha is out the door. You’ll give her the space she needs. Sometimes she’s like this after a mission. Things aren’t awkward necessarily but she acts different around you.

You go about your morning activities while Natasha is out running. She runs and runs until she can hardly breathe. The thoughts aren’t as loud when she’s running.

Natasha runs so far that she makes it to town. She sees a familiar bakery and makes a stop inside to get you a treat.

“There she is!” The owner says as Natasha walks through the door. You two frequent the place often. He knows you well. “We’ve missed you!”

“Hey, it’s good to see you,” Nat replies. “Can I get two of y/n’s usual?”

“Of course,” the man replies. He bags it up and hands it to Nat. She reaches for her wallet but he holds up his hand to stop her. “It’s on us. Welcome back, Ms. Romanoff.”

She thanks him and leaves the bakery. On her way back, she tries to work through some more difficult memories of the mission. Her motivation is to get back home to you.

It always is.

Natasha opens the door to your home again and finds you in your office. She knocks softly on the door. You jump out of your chair.

“I’m sorry!” She rushes out.

“It’s okay,” you assure her. “Just not used to you being back.”

Nat nods in understanding. She holds out the bag from the bakery. This time you jump out of your chair voluntarily.

“Is that what I think it is?” You ask her.

“It’s double what you think it is,” Nat replies. She hands you the bag.

“Come share it with me,” you say, gesturing to your desk.

Nat sits on the edge of the desk across from where you sit in your chair. The sweets are too much for her taste really, but she indulges and eats half of one.

“What did you do while I was gone?” Natasha asks, trying to get a conversation going.

“Well, let’s see. I worked, worked some more, watched tv, and spent some time with friends and family,” you tell her.

“That sounds nice,” Nat says.

“It was okay. I missed you more than anything,” you say.

“This time was hard for me too.”

“I know,” you say. “Do you want to-“

You stop talking and simply gesture for her to sit on your lap. It’s something she used to do without your insistence, but her boundaries are different after every mission.

Natasha nods and slowly straddles your legs with hers. Her body falls against yours. You allow her to make the next move.

You breathe a sigh of relief when Natasha wraps her arms around your waist and buries herself into you. Hugging her back, you hold her as close as you can.

"I’m here, baby,” you say softly. “It’s okay. I’ve got you.”

You feel tears on your neck as Natasha cries. You’ve only seen this happen a few times. As hard as it is to see it, the level of trust she has for you makes your heart swell. Not many people have seen this woman cry.

Natasha doesn’t move an inch for over an hour. You hold her for as long as she needs. When she pulls away, she looks into your eyes to see nothing but kindness.

“I’m sorry about this,” Natasha says.

“Hey, no don’t,” you say. “I’m here for you. Always.”

She feels her hands twitch as if she has to touch you, but she doesn’t know if she should. Those hands have caused pain and suffering. You see her internal dilemma.

“You can’t hurt me, Natasha,” you tell her. Her eyes widen a bit. How did you know what she was thinking?

“But I could,” she argues.

“But you won’t,” you reply.

“How do you know?”

“Because you’re you, baby. You’ve always been so gentle with me. These hands,” you begin, taking her hands in yours. “Have only served as a way to make me feel good. To make me happy. To make me fall in love with you even more. I trust you. You know I do.”

“I’ve just caused so much pain and suffering,” Natasha says.

“But oh so much more safety and calm,” you remind her. “I’m not afraid of you. I never have been.”

Natasha moves her hands to each side of your face. When you don’t flinch, she sees the truth of your words. She leans forward tentatively. You wait for her to kiss you.

When she does, it’s the most gentle kiss you’ve ever shared. A ghostly touch on your lips that lingers once she’s pulled away.

“I love you,” Natasha says. “I know I have a hard time saying it, but it’s how I always feel.”

“I love you too, Natasha. And you show me how you love me all of the time. You don’t need to say it for me to know it. I promise,” you tell her.

Natasha smiles softly and presses her head to your shoulder. You kiss her temple and rub her back softly.

“I should probably go so you can work,” Natasha mumbles.

“Stay with me?” You ask her.

“Okay,” Natasha replies.

She stays in your arms and even falls asleep after a while. You spend the entire day reassuring Natasha that everything is okay.

You’re so glad she’s home. And she knows she’s going to be okay as long as she’s with you.

#natasha romanoff x reader #natasha romanoff #soft natasha romanoff #natasha romanoff fluff #natasha romanoff comfort

[bombuni]

Please I LOVE your puppy yunho drabbles 😭😭

Would love to hear your thoughts on puppy yeo 👉🏻👈🏻 I have such a soft spot for this boy but it's so hard to find yeo content 🫠

(possibly how yunho would respond to MC getting another puppy? Not sure if you write poly or not so no pressure!)

-lyra

contains: nsfw, puppy!yunho (in my head he’s a retriever hybrid) puppy!yeosang (doberman duhhh) switch!yeosang (but he’s really dom-leaning in this), switch!yunho, fem!reader, breeding, threesome, biting kink, voyeurism (kinda)

minors dni

I WENT A LITTLE OVERBOARD BUT. i. Thought this idea was so hot. thank u for even asking this bc OMFFG. And Dw I will write enough Yeosang fics to feed the UNIVERSE!!!!

Yunho’s not too happy about having a new guy in the house. He’s much quieter, pushing Yunho’s attempts at conversation away as if he’s too good for him. His nervous eyes follow his every move and his frost-colored, cropped ears pin his location wherever he is.

You swear he’s sweet to you. And Yunho’s seen it, he is. He sits next to you voluntarily, actually has conversations with you, touches you fleetingly.

You tell Yunho it’s only for a couple days. That Yeosang’s owner was traveling, and he needed a place to stay in the meantime. Yunho’s glad to hear it’s temporary, now cheerily spouting hello’s at Yeosang any time he sees him (still ignored.)

Yunho’s not too worried when you leave them alone to run errands one day. Of course he doesn’t want to part from you, but he understands the need for alone time. He doesn’t protest when you leave, but the door slamming shut and the silence that follows makes his stomach drop.

Gosh, sometimes he doesn’t realize how much he really needs and craves you. It’s like his body is so used to having you 24/7, the sudden departure just causes him to wilt and deflate. He sits on the couch, away from Yeosang, somberly. His chin rests in his hands, blankly watching the TV and counting the seconds until you get home.

Yeosang notices. He doesn’t want to say anything, but Yunho’s pouty lips are making something inside him stir. To Yeosang, Yunho is just a pestering pup. Always yapping and annoyingly sweet. He’s not used to being around someone as endearing as him, and he’s mad he’s falling for his tricks. Yunho subconsciously whines while he watches the clock, so used to you listening to his every beck and call.

“Quiet,” Yeosang mumbles, trying to comfort him, “She’ll be back soon.”

Yunho had almost forgotten about Yeosang. He rolls his eyes, “What do you care? You’re just a meanie,”

Yeosang snorts at the nickname, “I don’t. You’re just annoying.”

Yunho takes that as his sign to push more buttons, suddenly throwing himself onto the couch and laying his head onto Yeosang’s lap, “I’m soooo bored, Yeosangie, let’s do something.”

Yeosang grumbles, but makes no move to leave, “Get off of me, mutt,”

Yunho laughs at that, “You’re one to talk,” he stretches his arms casually, as if this is an everyday occurrence, “Why don’t you make me?”

Yeosang stews for a few seconds, pouting to himself because of his predicament. Yunho has forgotten the whole thing, back to watching the boring program selling pretty diamond earrings.

Ah. That reminds him of something.

Yeosang’s hand crawls sneakily from his side to Yunho’s head, making no sound before harshly pulling on one of Yunho’s brown, floppy ears. A yelp comes out of Yunho as his head follows Yeosang’s directions, the sound turning into an embarrassed moan.

Yunho flushes at that. He’s embarrassed because he thought the only one who could pull those noises out of him were you. He feels like a slut for wanting more.

Yeosang is smirking cockily down at him, a smaller blush on his face, but his hand remains on Yunho’s ear, “See? Dirty mutt,”

Yunho’s cock stirs at that. He enjoys the game of punishment, and his voice trembles in anticipation, “‘M not-“

The door suddenly unlocks and it blurs the lines between what’s happening and you. He’s excited at the thought of you finding him like this. He wants to prove to you both what a good boy he can be.

You turn once your bags are put away and Yeosang watches in real time as the perverted smile on your face grows when you process what’s happening.

“My sweet puppy, what did you do to Yeosangie?” You coo at Yunho, leaning on the arm of the couch with a sweet smile.

You’re so sweet and soft and it makes Yunho want to explode on the spot, “N-nothing-“

Yeosang tugs at Yunho again, “That’s a lie.”

You tsk, your hand coming up to trace Yunho’s jawline and god, he really wanted you to touch him already, but that’s not enough. It’s never enough.

“I’m sorry for my puppy’s misbehavior,” you turn to Yeosang, “I think just for that, he doesn’t get to cum.”

Yunho’s eyes widen at that, “B-but I’m good! I’m being a good puppy!”

Both you and Yeosang give him an incredulous look and he knows there’s no way he’s winning. He hardly does with just you.

He whines pitifully, but he sits back and shuts his mouth in obedience. He knows he’s winning with you when you give him another soft, lovesick smile. But, Yeosang just stares.

Before Yunho can say anything, Yeosang is pulling you into his lap and marking you as his own. His lips trail from your jaw to your collarbone, back to your mouth. It’s intoxicating, watching you both lose yourselves to each other. Yeosang licks a stripe between your neck and shoulder and it sends a shiver down Yunho’s spine.

The room is suddenly too hot for Yunho, his hands and skin yearning, burning to feel any sort of touch from either of you. But, it never comes. He sits, whines, and watches as Yeosang keeps his tongue down your throat. He can’t help it when one of his hands flies down to his aching cock, trying to soothe the urge to pound you until you’re full. Like he usually does.

Yeosang sees out of the corner of his eye, “Don’t.”

Yunho’s eyes brim with tears. He’s shaking, trembling, fucking aching, to feel something (you) and he’s being denied. He can’t take it. To rub salt into the wound, Yeosang bites down on the same spot on your neck he licked, making direct eye contact with Yunho. You moan and thrash against Yeosang, your hiss of pleasure and pain hitting Yunho’s nerves like it’s him who’s being bitten.

“S-sangie,” your tone is all too familiar, needy and desperate and ready to be fucked dumb by his leaking cock. Yunho wants to, needs to, run to you and fill you up already, but Yeosang won’t let him.

Yeosang pulls your pants down hastily and as soon as your garments off, your sweet smell fills the room. It’s something Yunho will never get used to and something Yeosang is now newly addicted to.

Yunho doubles over at the intoxicating smell, his heightened senses making it just about x100 worse for him, “Please, I just wanna- please let me-“

Yeosang pushes Yunho off the couch, forcing him to sit besides your head and watch as Yeosang’s cock finally enters you. God, you’re wet and creaming on his cock as soon as he fills you to the hilt. Yunho can’t stop watching as your pussy sucks Yeosang in time and time again, even if he’s throbbing in pain because of it. It’s something he can’t look away from.

Your tits bounce against Yeosang’s harsh thrusts, both of your moans mixing and making a song Yunho won’t forget. You turn to look at Yunho, all fucked out, and your hand comes out to Yunho like a beacon of light. He groans lowly when he finally, finally feels the relief of your hand scratching behind his ears. It feels too good, too appeasing, too delightful to have your approval again that he almost wants to cry.

Yeosang keeps fucking you, the sound of skin slapping against skin filling the room, “What a pervert, fucking leaking everywhere,” Yunho nods feverishly against your hand, not ashamed of the wet spot forming on his sweatpants, “Why don’t you come play with her while I fuck her then?”

Yunho wastes no time in leaning over you and finding his way to your clit. Long fingers spread your juices over you, already familiar with the way you tick. His forefingers rub at your center feverishly, mouth agape and eyes trained on Yeosang’s cock pistoning into you.

You moan and thrash against Yunho’s fingers, all of the attention on you is too overwhelming. Too good.

“Sh-shit,” Yeosang feels you tightening up against him, driving him to fuck you even harder to fill your sweet hole up faster. His voice passes through you like a thunderstorm, soft but fierce with an underlying, dangerous current.

Yunho smirks up at Yeosang, fingers still continuing their quick pace, “You gonna cum? Hmm? Feel how fucking tight she gets?” Yeosang’s hips stutter, his hands shaking against your skin, and god, he doesn’t want this to end, but he really, really wants to take you all for himself and fill you so everyone knows you’re his.

Yunho leans up to Yeosang, hot breath fanning against his ear and sending chills down his spine when his gentle hand runs along the fur of it, “Go on. She wants it all,” the retriever turns to you, “Don’t you, pup?”

You nod but Yeosang doesn’t take that for an answer, “Tell me how bad you want my pups,”

Your hands tremble against Yeosang, “S-so bad, Sangie, please, want you to fill me up.”

The idea of you swollen and heavy with their pups spurs them on. They both let out a shaky breath, before Yeosang fucks you harder than ever before and Yunho leans up to take all of your moans for himself. You can feel his hips grinding against the couch, the wet spot on his pants growing bigger and bigger. He’s your desperate, needy boy like always.

The sight of Yunho desperately and dumbly rocking his hips against whatever he can find and your tits bouncing is almost too much for Yeosang. He whines as he bottoms out inside you, his hips against yours attempting to reach the deepest part of you. You feel him coating your insides white, twitching inside of you as Yunho coos praise at you.

Yeosang is leaking out of you and there’s still more coming. You start to think he might’ve actually filled you to your capacity. Your body’s too hot now, looking down at Yeosang’s cock still balls-deep in you.

Yunho kisses the dreamy look off your face, “Such a good pup, milking Sangie for all he’s got,” his fingers card through your hair, “Say thank you.”

“Thank you, Sangie.” Your voice is trembling. Yeosang pulls out of you and the whine he lets out is completely involuntary. The sight of your cream-covered pussy is enough to get him ready for another round. He can’t get enough of you now, and he realizes why Yunho can’t be away from you for even one day.

You pipe up suddenly, “Yun, you didn’t get to-“

His tail wags frighteningly fast, “Oh no, I did. Twice.”

It’s hard having two insatiable beings tied to you, but you make it work.

#ateez #ateez x reader #ateez imagines #ateez oneshot #ateez scenarios #ateez fic #ateez fluff #ateez smut #jeong yunho #yunho x reader #yunho smut #kang yeosang #yeosang x reader #yeosang smut

[eamour]

all about techniques.

there are so so many techniques and methods that people have come up with to make manifesting easier and more entertaining. so, let’s talk about the most important points when practicing those techniques!

manifestation techniques.

a technique in terms of manifesting is a method to make you experience the satisfaction of your desire within your imagination. it does not only make manifesting easier and more enjoyable for you but it also helps you to shift your concept of self. you can use any technique to help you embody or identify with your desire.

techniques don’t manifest.

the problem with techniques in manifestation (such as visualisation, affirmations, sats, the "i am/void"-state) is that people tend to assign power to these techniques — more power than to themselves.

again, a method is supposed to HELP and ASSIST you. it’s not doing any of the creating-your-reality work, unlike you. YOU are indeed manifesting things into your reality, with or without a technique. remember. you are manifesting at all times, you are occupying all sorts of states throughout the day, making your current state of consciousness manifest. are you scripting for each state which you NATURALLY shift to? no matter what technique you do, its only purpose is to help you create experiences you would like to have mentally. that’s where all manifestations take place first — in the MIND. not because you have written it down on paper.

all techniques are equal.

when i say "equal", i'm not saying that each technique is the same in terms of what you're doing and how you're doing it. no, all techniques are equal because they all FUNCTION equally and guarantee the same results. no technique works better than the other. no technique is either superior, or inferior.

here's the thing: the reason why people say "this technique works so much better and faster for me!" is because they favour it. they enjoy doing it. doing the technique feels natural to them and doesn’t require a lot of effort. it’s not something that they have to bring themselves to do with force — they LIKE doing it. that’s because we are all different. i know people who could write a fucking novel with the scripts they have in mind. then i know people who love to affirm whenever they can because they think it’s convenient for them to do. and then there is me who loves to listen to music and visualise my desired scenes. what we have in common is that we do all these techniques because they suit us and we can choose to try any other technique whenever we want. we aren’t tied to one technique only. sometimes i end up writing a whole list of things that i want to have, accept it as mine, and go on with my day. works JUST as well as visualising.

please, do not …

... force it · for example, the scenes you could visualise when trying to fulfill yourself or let yourself experience a scenario you desire should come to you naturally. the affirmation you would like to use should feel natural to you. a technique is always something you choose to do voluntarily. it isn’t a rule you need to follow. you're not obligated to do this exact technique for this long and that many days, and so on.

... perfect it · when you do a technique, it’s not your goal to do it as perfect and as accurate as possible. you don’t have to visualise a picture perfect scene, nor will you fail to manifest if you miss to affirm the rest of your affirmations-list. you can forget details when scripting, be as detailed or vague in your visual scenes, or only affirm one single affirmation — that’s perfectly fine! your perfect scene in imagination or your affirmations aren’t what makes it perfect in the physical world, it’s the FEELING you get from it. if you can perfectly FULFILL yourself, then it will be perfectly reflected back to you in its physical form. inner acceptance is what creates fulfillment, not the perfection of a technique.

... complicate it · a technique cannot put you into a spiral and make you question your whole reality just because you think you haven’t done it "correctly". there is no right way to do a technique and no fixed way to practice it. do whatever you like and however you like it!

... follow others · now, you can definitely try a technique that seems interesting to you, that has been introduced to you by others or that you think will be enjoyable. nevertheless, a technique that feels normal and natural to others doesn’t have to feel normal and natural to you. don’t commit to doing something because you think or you've been told that this is the technique you need to do in order to manifest your desire.

no have to's, only want to's.

the premise of each and every technique is that you WANT to do it. there is no forcing, no pushing, no "need to" or "have to". it’s personal, it’s something YOU like doing, not what the bigger collective seems to be practicing. this is what i always remind myself of when practicing anything loa related: you cannot commit to something you dont love, you’ll cheat. meaning, you won’t be able to do a technique properly (as in, having and being), therefore won’t change self and remain the exact same.

if you like visualising, do it! if you like affirming all the time, do it! if you like counting your affirmations, do it! if you like scripting, do it! if you do the lullaby method before going to bed, do it! if you like rampaging after you wake up, do it! again, you are the creator and you choose which technique(s) suits you the best.

what to do.

when manifesting with the help of a technique, focus on inner acceptance. accept your desire as factual. make it a present, undeniable fact. because accepting your desire to be true means to identify with it in imagination, therefore you BE or HAVE it. that’s your goal, that’s your priority.

with love, ella.

#loa #law of assumption #loassumption #the law of assumption #neville goddard #edward art #manifestation #manifesting #manifest #manifest it #manifesting it #master manifestor #how to manifest #states #eiypo #everyone is you pushed out #sp #self concept #specific person #spiritual #spirituality #subliminals #law of attraction #void state #i am state #reality shifting #shifting realities #shiftblr #loablr #loa tumblr

[doudouneverte]

Loved it I was the one that requested it would definitely love more Laura feirsinger fics there's none of her and would also love a Sarah zardrasil one.

a/n: your desires are orders...

Kisses

*not my GIF*

Pairing: Sarah Zadrazil x Bayern Munich!reader

Summary: you don't let your girlfriend kissing you back and it starts to get on her nerves

Type: Fluff

Warning: nothing

word count: 1284

---------

It's been a few months now since you started doing that. You and Sarah have been dating for almost a year now, and you both couldn't be more happy. But despite all the love she felt for you, the Austrian couldn't help but be a little confused recently.

Since you were named champion of the Frauen Bundesliga last season, you developed a habit of kissing your girlfriend on the cheek and flew away before she could reciprocate it.

Today was not an exception. You walked into a very excited changing room. Everyone seemed ready for training, which meant you were the last one to leave it after you changed. On your way to the training pitch, you saw your girlfriend talking with Jovana.

You started to walk a little faster to catch them. When you reached them, you surprised the Austrian by giving her an intense kiss a few millimeters of her lips. This action made the midfielder turn crimson red while you acknowledged your fellow striker.

Sarah stayed silent—not too long to be questioned, but just enough to let you flee away before she could say anything. The Serbian's laugh brought her back to reality. "How can you still be stunned like that even if you know it will come?" She asked, making your girlfriend blush a little more.

Those types of things didn't happen just when you were alone. In fact, all the team were aware of that. Some of them even started to bet on how much you could kiss her discreetly before she protested. Spoiler alert: it happened only once, and it was after more than ten kisses.

Of course, sometimes Sarah tried to surprise you and be the one who let you stun, but unfortunately, it was like you had a sixth sense made for her because you were always aware when she tried to kiss you, like this time.

You were stretching when Kathie came to start a little conversation with you. Of course, she didn't come without ulterior motives, but she didn't know that you already knew that. While she entertained you with a chat about the next game, Sarah made her way to you, trying to be as sneaky as possible.

The older Austrian should know that you would know that she was trying something when everyone just stopped what they were doing to look at her.

Some of your teammates wanted to see Sarah succeed for once; they always helped her every time, even if they knew that you would find a way to spot her before she reached you.

The silence immediately alerted you that something was happening, and it didn't take you long to guess what when you noticed Kathie sending a quick glance behind you.

When you felt a hand on your shoulder, you turned around and lowered your body before grabbing Sarah's tights and lifting her, which obviously surprised her. You didn't wait before showering her face with a ton of pecks and kisses, making her giggle and laugh. "Okay, stop! I surrender!" She said between giggles, and you stopped instantly. She properly wrapped her arms around your neck and let you transport her to Jovana and Georgia.

"How can you always know?" The English midfielder asked you when you reached them.

"Because I know her so well." You replied, making your girlfriend pout.

"You should let her get you at least once." The striker said feeling a little bad for all of Sarah's failures.

"Uh, impossible." You said earning a shocking look from your girlfriend. "She made it a competition, and you know how much I hate to lose, even against her." You explained. "And it would not be funny if I voluntarily let her get me." You added before giving a quick peck on your girlfriend's nose before letting her go.

The rest of the training was more calm, which shocked a few people, but they didn't question it.

Not living with Sarah yet meant that you were a little shocked to see a pair of shoes in front of the door after you came back from the grocery store. "Babe?" You called her but didn't receive any response. After a stop at the kitchen, you made your way into your bedroom, where you found your girlfriend asleep on your bed in one of your national shirts from your closet.

The view made you smile. You took a picture and left a kiss on her forehead before changing your clothes and joining her.

One hour later, the Austrian midfielder woke up a little confused before she remembered what happened. She came a few hours ago to surprise you and spent the night with you, but she fell asleep while she was waiting for you. When she heard some noise next to her, she turned her head to find you deeply asleep next to her.

Your cuteness almost stopped her brain for a moment before something popped in her head. She glanced around until she spotted something on your nightstand. After finishing what she wanted to do, she let you sleep and made her way to the living room.

Less than an hour later, Sarah was cooking when she heard the door of the bedroom open and close. Then she heard the door of the bathroom open, and she already started to smile.

"Sarah Zadrazil!" You yelled from the bathroom before making your way to where you could find someone laughed. "What's the hell is that?" You asked her, referring to your cheek.

She didn't reply immediately and laughed for a few seconds, making you lose your attitude.

"Look at you, babe. You're stunning like that." She joked. You wanted to protest, but you stopped when you saw her grabbing her phone.

"What are you doing?" You asked even if you already knew.

"Stay here." She instructed before she opened the camera and took her place next to you for a selfie. She didn't let you react before she sent it to the club group chat.

"You're a child." You said trying to wipe away the lipstick trail on your cheek.

"I know, but you love me." She said, giving a quick peck on your lips. You didn't have time to reply before your phones started to blow up with notifications from the group chat.

My Queen✨: I did it! Linda: yeah finally! G💪: finally! Gwinny: wow congratulations 🎉 Jovi: we need to celebrate it Lina: i thought you were better than that Y/n/n You: i was sleeping 😭 Klara: it didn't change anything. she got you Kathie: i always believed in you Sarah Sam: i thought Y/n was better than that 😑 You: even you sammy 😭 Jill: i'm disappointed Y/n but congratulations Sarah

And it continued like that for almost an hour, making your girlfriend laugh at your low defense. After you washed your face and ate, you decided to watch a movie with your girlfriend.

"I didn't think the girls were so implied into that." You said completely cuddled against Sarah's body.

"Me too, but I'm glad that they are." The Austrian replied. "You know they will not let you live after that." She reminded you, making you grumble immediately.

"You just did it one time." You said a little offended.

"I know, but it's still a victory for me. I'm just better, but it's not a competition." She said giving you one of her brightest smiles.

"Okay, continue like that, and you sleep on the couch." You warned her even if you both knew it was an empty threat.

"Sorry, babe." She kissed you passionately. "I really, really love you. Do you know that?" 

"Of course I do, and you want to know a secret? I love you the same."

#woso x reader #woso fanfics #sarah zadrazil #sarah zadrazil x reader #bayern frauen #bayern fraeun x reader

[lina-linny]

summary: you are in an secret relationship with Wooyoung

Words: 1.5k

I carefully walked through the corridors of the backstage area until I found the right door. I hesitated briefly before pushing the door handle down to prepare myself mentally for the chaos that was likely to come with a job at Ateez.

When I actually got into the mess by opening the door and walking through, I was still anything but prepared for the hectic bustle inside the waiting room.

Wooyoung noticed me first. His face lit up in an instant and he came rushing towards me to embrace me.

"yyyyyyyyyyyy/nnnnnnnnnnnnnn I missed you sooooo much!!!" he wailed as he hugged me. "Woo we last saw each other two hours ago.

" I said softly but couldn't resist pressing him a little closer to me.

"But that was way too long! I really missed you." He didn't say the last sentence so exaggeratedly and I knew he meant it.

"I'm sorry." I mumbled. I couldn't handle these quick switches from fun to sincerity that Wooyoung sometimes made.

"I was only gone because I had something to do," I explained.

"Why didn't you tell me?" Wooyoung sounded really surprised, but didn't move a bit in our embrace.

"Didn't think of it, sorry." I stroked his hairline.

"Do you want to make it up to me?" He asked into the crook of my neck. Now Woo lifted his head and grinned at me challengingly. I sighed inwardly. What was this restless man up to again? Definitely nothing good. However, I really owed him one. So I just shrugged my shoulders. Woo's grin grew even wider if possible.

"You could kiss it good again. Then I might forgive you." Wooyoung stared directly into my eyes, which were widened with surprise, while his face hovered right in front of mine. My gaze slid to his lips. While we were standing there, I had completely blocked out the other people in the room, but at that moment they came back to me like alarm bells.

I squirmed out of Wooyoung's embrace with a bright red head, stuck my tongue out at him and disappeared as quickly as possible.

~☆~

I stared at the hellish mess in front of me. Wooyoung, san and yeosang were lying on the floor. They were making a murderous noise while San and Wooyoung started tickling and kissing poor Yeosang.

But as sorry as I felt for Yeosang, couldn't he scream and cry a little quieter? Besides, it would be more pleasant for everyone present if San and Woo could continue at a more subdued volume. (They would never stop voluntarily anyway. That's why I didn't get my hopes up).

I loved all the boys they were just a bit too loud for some. My migraine from the day before was throbbing in my head and yet I had to smile at the sight of these three idiots.

I had known ateez for 5 years now. I had been with them since the beginning of their career. I work as a make up artist for KQ and loved my job as well as the people I did it with. They were all like a second family to me.

I had taken all eight members of Ateez to my heart, but I was particularly fond of one person. Whenever he teased me with banalities or laughed uproariously about something while clapping his hands, my heart fluttered a little too much.

I had fallen in love with young Wooyoung bit by bit over time. And while everyone just saw us as two good friends, something else developed between us.

Wooyoung's flirting was almost too obvious. When a friend tells you that you can "kiss it good again" while his face hovers inches away from yours, that's not normal.

But if you could still somehow ignore all these clear signs, it was over by our first kiss at the latest. Good friends don't kiss, don't spend hours thinking about how the other person's lips tasted or feel that unbearable tingling all over their body.

Good friends didn't say "I love you" to each other, but we did all that. We loved each other behind closed doors.

Sighing, I came back to reality and made my way to my make up desk. Let's get to work!

~☆~

It started relaxed. Jongo came first. He didn't talk that much. Just let me do my work silently.

Then came Hongjoong. He practiced his rap parts of the songs that Ateez was about to perform. Sometimes he shook me a little, which is why I asked him to be quiet for a moment at the most important parts. As soon as I finished, he started singing again, which made me smile.

Next it was Yeosang's turn. He was also very quiet, but had small conversations with me from time to time. When there was silence, it was never unpleasant but simply reassuring.

Then came Seonghwa. The Korean talked to me the whole time. We had a relaxed conversation and talked about all sorts of things.

After these four members had been so relaxed, I naively assumed that the remaining four would be similarly calm. But I rejoiced too soon.

The next three (San, Yunho and Mingi) teased me incessantly. Obviously the three of them had observed the situation after my arrival and thought it was a good idea to tease me about Wooyoung. I actually knew that I shouldn't take the teasing to heart, but it wasn't that easy. I was bright red and didn't talk while I was doing their make-up. While my lips were drawn into a thin line.

Mingi quickly understood that I was very uncomfortable and quickly dropped the subject, but my hands were shaking slightly as I started to do Wooyoung's make-up. Even though I tried to hide the trembling, Wooyoung definitely noticed how my hands were shaking.

"You look really sexy." he grinned in an attempt to cheer me up and I forced a smile. He fround and took my hands carefully in his, preventing me from continuing with my job.

"Y/n what's wrong?" he asked quietly. He didn't need to ask if anything was wrong he knew it was and he also knew that if he asked if anything was wrong I would always answer that "everything was fine" even if I was dying inside. I wasn't good at talking about my problems but I did my best.

"The others saw us... at the entrance... earlier." I became even redder and wondered whether the rest of my body was still supplied with blood if I had this amount of blood on my face.

"Am I making you uncomfortable?"

"You know you're not making me uncomfortable. It's just... I don't know either... I think I'm afraid people will think I took advantage of my position or something. If they find out you'remy boyfriend." I only whispered the last part but Wooyoung had heard it.

"I understand that you're worried but we both know that you would never take advantage of your position. That's all that matters. And if anyone ever says something like that, you have every right to punch them in the face." His tone was now deadly serious and my heart warmed because he wasn't just dismissing my concerns like so many before him.

"When you're ready I'll tell them all that you're with me and I'm with you, that i love you more than the anything and if anyone makes a stupid comment..." he didn't finish the sentence but it was enough for me. I smiled hopefuly and nodded.

After this i simply continued with the make-up. This time calmer than before. Woo stared at me the whole time but remained silent.

So I turned my attention to his lips. I had chosen the perfect shade of lipstick for them and was now applying it. I was so focused that I didn't notice my boyfriend starting to stare at my lips.

I made the final stroke and took a step back to look at my work, but before I knew it, his lips came closer to me and stopped inches from my own. By stopping he wanted to give me a chance to escape. He wanted me to decide if I was ready for it. I was confused by his actions but I didn't hesitate for a moment.

As I joined our lips our souls merged into one . our lips moved in unison. My lipstick smudged with his but I couldn't have been more indifferent. We both felt this pleasant tingle run through our bodies.

When we broke away, we giggled. I heard clapping and whistling from the corner of the room where the rest of the Members and Staff were sitting. They all beamed at me, which also put a smile on my face.

I looked back at Wooyoung, who was already being teased by san for always making a big show out of everything and that he shouldn't brag about me like that. They both laughed so heartily that it only deepened my smile.

But as nice as the situation was, Wooyoung's lipstick was now officially ruined and I definitely needed to fix it again before he went on stage.

~☆~

I watched as the eight members all made their final preparations. Some checked their in-ear again, others stretched, and even others went over their lines one last time.

Wooyoung did none of this. He preferred to snuggle up to me and ignore the fact that he had to be on stage in a few minutes.

"Woo you have to go! You can't just stay with me."

"And what if that's exactly what I want?  just want to cuddle with my girlfriend." I sighed but had to smile. This stupid boy.

"Come on, don't be like that. You can cuddle with me again in a few hours."

"But that's far too long!"

The manager's voice announced that everyone should get ready. In a minute they were ready to go on stage. Wooyoung broke away from me, grumbling and complaining, and joined the other members.

The music started and the first one walked onto the stage, then the second. Suddenly Wooyoung broke away from the queue, ran back to me and planted a kiss on my rosy lips.

Then he ran straight onto the stage as the last of the eight members. Smiling, I ran my finger over my swollen lips. He was such an idiot sometimes, I thought, shaking my head. My idiot.

#ateez x reader #wooyoung #wooyoung x reader #ateez #wooyoung x y/n #ateez oneshot #boyfriend #kpop #south korea #secret romance

[xappetites]

this was supposed to be a little Price thought but it got away from me and it's 1112 words

warnings: fem!reader who's decided kids aren't the best idea for her, mentions of sex and breeding kink, brief mentions of a disordered relationship w/food

“Are you still planning on children?”

It takes John a minute, in the post coital haze, to understand the question his wife whispers from the bathroom doorway, naked in the easy way of years together.

She stands there, skin reddened in the places he was just holding onto like a lifeline, and she looks at the towel in her hands instead of him. It’s steps, between them, but they turn to ice for John, a little Siberia in the middle of South East London.

“Loaded question, isn’t it, love?”

“You brought it up,” she breaks the frost, moving to settle on the edge of the bed, right next to him. Her towel is warm, he realizes, as she works it over where he’s drying itchy with sweat and cum. Barely wet and gentle on his skin.

And John knows what she means, can still feel the words on his tongue: I’ll fill you, love, fill you ‘till it takes. He doesn’t regret them, doesn’t want to regret them because it gets him there in record time, does the job so well for him that just thinking about them has his cock hardening again to the warmth and the wetness and the subtle pressure of her hands.

But that’s all it is, a fantasy that ends here, when he cums. He doesn’t spend his days imagining his wife pregnant in his daily life. In fact, now that he thinks about it, the thought’s strange, leadens his stomach with an irrational sort of anxiety. He spends too much time away, too far removed from this unstoppable woman, to think of her vulnerable and not feel a certain kind of madness tugging at the threads of his self control.

“Do you want children?”

He counters, buys time, though he knows it’s unfair to twist the question on her. They talked about it, once, before the marriage, when they felt younger and the future seemed so terribly malleable. John said it might be good to have a couple. But he didn’t want to be a Christmas dad, seeing his offspring every four to six months and have them cry in his arms because they don’t recognize a man who’s more thought than father to them.

He’d planned to retire, cut back at least, before he’d consider any children. And now he can’t, not with so much to do. He couldn’t sit by a desk and watch other people forced into the kinda shit only he —and Kyle and Soap and Simon— will voluntarily sign up for. So it’s looking more and more like it might not happen for him, and he’s comfortable with that.

But they’d agreed, back then, on an indefinite but small amount of kids. And now his wife, the one with an actual life and a home where she welcomes him, is not looking at him as he refuses to answer. Not until he hooks his fingers in the crook of her knee and smooths his thumb over her thigh. She sighs at the touch, leaves the towel in favor of drawing nonsense patterns over his stomach.

“I don’t think it would be a good idea for me to have children, John”

He frowns, but waits in silence. There’s something sad hiding behind the fleeting smile she gives him, something guilty that makes him brace himself for movement. The impulse he’s felt since the moment he fell in love with her, to fight for her, against the world. Like he’s an attack dog, built for violent resistance in her name.

“My body feels off, some days, like I don’t belong in it. I skip breakfast sometimes, I leave the metro a station back, for the walk.”

Her voice is soft, but her eyes are unrelenting, now that she’s started. And she rushes through the admission, makes it a simple stating of facts, like making the shopping list.

“I don’t think I can survive having someone else in this body without hating them, and a baby doesn’t deserve that. I don’t deserve that. I’m sorry.”

John’s heart balloons in the quiet of the moment. He can’t help the lopsided smile that tugs at the corners of his mouth, which he realizes isn’t a reasonable reaction. But it’s this, the clarity and the unflinching honesty, why he adores her so completely.

Whatever ache is in the confirmation of closing this particular door, outweighed by the pride of knowing she trusts him with the naked, uncomfortable truths of her. And that, John supposes, is what burns at him and he doesn’t know how to put into words when he talks about filling her up, when he thinks about breeding, in the most primal, basic sense of the kink. He just wants to make himself a part of her, wants to know her to the last little cell and live in the spaces between them.

“So if you want to have children, I think we would have to consider other options.”

That comment brings John’s focus snapping back to her hands, to the way she spins her wedding band, tugs on it until it hits the speed bump of the knuckle, a gesture he isn’t sure is conscious but that telegraphs exactly where her head is at.

“You’re all I want, love. No hypotheticals.”

“John—“

“No,” he catches her hand, pulls it back to his chest. He uses it to anchor himself, sitting up to kiss away whatever objection she’s cooking up. “I don’t say what I don’t believe in, right?”

“Right,” her stance slackens and her body tilts forward so her torso slots against his, a perfect fit.

“Won’t bring it up again, love.”

“I like it,” it’s a mumble against his neck, his jaw, that turns into kisses that follow the line of his beard. “Just wanted to let you know, in case—“

John simply hums, keeps the groan in his throat, the one she likes best; because however tempting her sweet weight is on him, he’s weighing his options for breaching the other touchy subject this impromptu conversation raised, on a cold morning in the middle of his first week home in a while.

“About the eating—“

“I have it handled,” she says, stretching and twisting until her legs end up on each side of him again, "I'm trying."

"Ok. But you'll let me know if you need something from me, right?"

She nods, pulls back form him just to grin like she's misbehaving, or just about to.

"Could I have another round for now?"

And John laughs against her until she's squirming at the feeling of his whiskers on her skin, 'cause how could he ever deny his favorite girl.

#m: cod #r: fluff #captain john price x reader #personal #i'm actually sort of nervous about posting this #cause i feel like the fandom at large has decided Price is a dad™ and the thought of him not having biological children #and by choice no less is an unpopular opinion

[fan-goddess]

10 things I hate about you

Pairing: Ettore x Female reader

Summary: You hate Ettore. You hate him for so many different reasons. The thing you hate the most though, is that you don’t even hate him at all.

Warnings: Non canon Ettore, heavy smut talk though no real smut is mentioned, reader is female no pronouns, talk of masturbation, the box

Main Masterlist is here

Ewan Mitchell Masterlist here

Other Chapters: One, Two, Three, Four, Five

Series Masterlist here

You hate how Ettore never voluntarily talks to anyone. The only time you’ve heard him is with Dibs. He’s said the odd ‘yes’, ‘no’ even a small ‘scuse me’ when he’s cutting in line again. You’ve tried to imagine what he’d sound like saying normal sentences. Though what even are normal sentences now? Usually it includes asking Dibs about tests or saying thank you for the small amount of food you’re given. Still, you try and make it sound like he’s saying all these things in your head. It never sounds right.

You hate how he somehow gives off an aura. It’s a certain kind, one that somehow screams for you to fuck off. Whenever he’s got that face on he’s not approachable at all. Not that anyone even really tries anymore. You’ve possibly seen people attempt at a conversation, but all it takes is a look and their off. He gives off a certain aura that makes it so you wouldn’t want to go up to him even if he was the most prettiest man on the whole ship.

You hate how he stares. Sometimes when you go to look at him, you find he’s already looking at you to begin with. He’s not even a silent starer. You can sometimes feel his stare on you like a heat radiating rash. He doesn’t even make a face when he’s looking which is near the worst part of it. It’s all in his eyes. The eyes which seem to peace apart any living part of you and decide you of your worth. It’s like they hold no true emotion. Like he’s a robot sent by the earth humans to check up on you all.

You hate his stupid tattoos. There’s three of them that decorate his body, and yet they all look near identical to each other. Each of them are triangles. Ones on his neck and the others are on one of each of his arms. You have no idea why they all look near the same, except for some of the inner detailing of it you spotted when you stood behind him. You’ve tried to think of reasons why someone would get the same tattoo multiple times. Once you pondered if he was part of a cult. Maybe he’s apart of the illuminati? That one made you laugh, but then at least the multiple triangles would actually make sense. You don’t think anyone’s ever asked him about them or if they ever did, he’s never told them.

You hate how he’s cocky. He never talked to confirm it, but you know that he knows he’s good looking. You know this, as you noticed near the beginning of your watching, he never had a shirt on. It’s almost worse how when you’re all forced to run for exercise, he runs shirtless. You’re glad he runs at the back cause otherwise you’ll be forced to bare witness to his bare naked sweaty chest. It’s always rare to see him wear a shirt. He knows he’s got a good body and he’s very prepared to use it for his own needs. The other women ignore him but you think you know him better than anyone. Better than anyone’s tried at least…

You hate how he’s always in that god damn box. You can’t even count on both your hands the amount of times the two of you have bumped into each other coming out of the box. It’s not the fact that he alway seems to be somehow hard and horny which annoys you. It’s the fact that when he goes out he looks so pleased with himself with a smirk decorating his face. Like you said before, ‘cocky’. Even when you walk into him from the box, he gives a small smirk and a small apology, “Sorry princess…” and a lingering touch to your arms as he goes past. Maybe he thinks about you in there? It brings a heat to you that you refuse to let yourself extinguish.

You hate how he’s unintentionally funny. When he cut in line once for food and the person he cut protested, he flung his arms out similarly to what a bellboy in a hotel wouldn’t done. It made you laugh slightly though the laugh quickly died when Ettore made eye contact. He didn’t say anything to you. He didn’t attempt to question why you laughed. All he did was carry on the normal routine, the normal routine for him at least… He sits at his table. He says sarcastic things which sometimes brings a smile to your lips.

You hate how Ettore is actually an attractive person. He has a sharp jawline that looks like it could cut glass. He has piercing blue eye you only ever got to see once. In line for food once he stood behind you. You could nearly feel the body beat coming from him and his stupid pretty shirtless body. When you turned aroung you found him already looking at you. His eyes were dark blue. Similarly to the light that shon through the ship when it was dark. The smirk you see when you see him leave the box. It’s like you’re catching him something he’s not supposed to be doing.

You hate how you know what he did to deserve to be put on this ship. You had a free afternoon and Dibs just so happened to leave her door open and the password to her computer on a piece of paper in her drawer. You didn’t want to initially peek at his file. Your curiosity got the mere better of you when your leg started to twitch and your fingers started picking at your nails. Though when you read his file the disgust and regret hit you like a train. You nearly vomited in Dibs’ little paper bin in her office. After finding that out though, you started making connections to things Ettore does. The way he only seems to stare at women. Late at night when you’re supposed to be asleep, you’ve heard footsteps come to the outside of your room and stay there for a while before seemingly leaving after a while. You don’t know if it’s him or not, but the ever since you knew of his reasons for coming here you’ve been more stricter with yourself in your watching of him. If he’s capable of doing what he did on earth, what’s gonna stop him from doing it on the ship with so little people?

You hate how even after saying how you hated all those things about him you didn’t actually hate him. You hated how actually you fantasise about him saying all these things to you. Calling you his good girl as he pounded into you till you begged him to stop from the overstimulation. You hated how you imagined his piercing gaze staring into your soul as he forced you to pleasure yourself in front of him. You hated how you imagined having your face buried into his neck and just seeing a bead of sweat trailing down his annoying repetitive tattoos and licking it away. You hate imagining how cocky he would be in bed, making you beg for him to allow you to cum while you moan and writhe beneath him. You hated how if you ever did have sex with him, you’d be able to admire his prettiness up close. You hated thinking about how he maybe thinks about you in the box, his cock in his hand thinking of ways to take you and mark you.

Though with all this supposed hate going through your head, you have no real idea that he’s thinking the same thing. How he hates that you are the only one who truly excites him anymore. And how he’s this close to truly marking you…

#ettore #ettore x reader #non canon Ettore #high life #high life fanfiction #Ewan Mitchell character #Ewan Mitchell #terrible character but I love the actor #Ettore/reader #ettore fic related

[oftlunarialmoon]

5 Imaginary Play Prompts for Age Regressors / Agere - How to Play Pretend (Agere)

Ciao lovelies! Today I have another Agere post for you all! Sorry that it’s been so long since the last one, but I think you will really like this! Have you ever had trouble deciding what to do with your toys when you’re regressed? Do you feel kind of annoyed because it’s hard to pick a game or prompt to go off for pretend play? Well, I’ve got 5 pretend-play prompts for age regressors to talk to you all about today! Let’s get into this and learn how to play pretend, agere edition!

Imaginative play is a super important and fun part of life. As children, imagination shapes your problem solving skills and provides tons of entertainment. But as we get older physically, even if we��re still children on the inside, getting that inspiration back can be very very tricky. Society is somewhat built to suppress imagination in “adults,” so it’s not uncommon to feel like you’ve “lost your imagination” as you get older. What I’ve found that helps me when I want to begin a session of imaginary play, is something to begin with, like a prompt! In this post, I’ve listed and described 5 of my favorite imaginary play prompts that can be used with toys, stuffies, or even just in journaling or drawing! These prompts are the ones I use most often and I enjoy the most. There’s no ranking here, just five ideas in a random order. I really hope these can help those of you who are looking for a place to start when you’re wanting to voluntarily regress!

Idea 1: Game Show!

This first idea is something I find super fun, and it’s easy to customize it to whatever you prefer. The idea is essentially, set up a game show for your stuffies, dolls, toys, etc, whatever you want to do! You can be the game show host, or choose a toy to be the host and announcer. When picking the contestants, try to give them fun back-stories to affect the game! 

I like using this idea in various ways. Sometimes it’s similar to “Total Drama Island”. Sometimes I frame it as a task oriented game show like “Wheel of Fortune” or “Jeopardy!” Other times, I set it up like a cooking show, similar to things like “Great British Bake Off” or “Chopped”. 

You can also have fun with this by imagining the prizes or even crafting them! Sometimes I like to draw and cut out prizes like huge fake checks (like the ones on TV), or award badges. Other times, I like using a treasure chest as a “grand cash prize!” Adding my own touch to these things is really enjoyable and adds to the experience overall.

My last tip for this prompt is, the more outlandish and wild you make the contestants, the more fun you’ll have! Don’t be afraid to make certain characters fall into reality tv tropes, those sort of things are totally fun in this type of game. 

If you’ve used a prompt like this before, comment below how you set up your game show! I would totally love to hear more ideas.

Idea 2: Deserted Island / Shipwrecked

Okay, so this next idea is something I like doing with smaller toys, so I can give them a big island to explore. I usually pick like 3-5 “characters” who get stranded on a deserted island together and have to figure out survival. Sometimes I have items they brought with them, but not always. This is a fun idea if you like camping or outdoorsy type stuff. It can totally be played outside, but that’s not required. 

A tip for playing this inside: use blankets/towels to add different “zones” of play. For example, I like to use my orange Umaru blanket for sand type things, and blue towels or sheets for the ocean. This is helpful if it’s harder for you to visualize environments like that.

Some other ways to add to this prompt, I suggest having a variety of character types to play with. Not everyone can be amazing at survival stuff, and everyone has their strengths and weaknesses. Giving everyone a different special skill can really help with that too. It’s fun to flesh out team dynamics in that way! It’s kind of like one-person-DnD.

It’s perfectly okay to use pre-established stories too! Sometimes I like to act out scenes from Jurassic World Camp Cretaceous with this prompt, or even have similar concepts to Jurassic Park 3. (I’m a huge Jurassic Park/World nerd, I know, lol!) There’s nothing wrong with using existing stories as a starting point or as a “script” of sorts. Imagination comes in all forms, and using inspiration is perfectly normal!

If you’ve played something like this before during your regression, (or childhood!), please comment below, I’d really like to hear the types of stories you use with your toys as well! I’m a huge fan of sharing concepts and ideas as a community, so hearing from you is always my favorite thing, and totally makes my day!

Idea 3: Detectives

This is one of my fave tropes/concepts in media, when a show has an episode where they have to solve a mystery! It’s super fun to watch and even more fun to act out. The way I like to play this one is usually pretty simple, but then escalates over the storyline. 

Usually, I first pick out what type of mystery is being solved. Murder Mysteries can be good (more on that in Idea 4,) but I also like heists, conspiracies, ancient magic, stuff like that! After picking the type of mystery, I like picking 2 characters to be a “watson and holmes” type duo. Sometimes I bring in more characters to work with them, like random experts that are relevant to the type of mystery, key witnesses, etc. 

One of my absolute favorite things to do in this scenario is adding in obstacles/roadblocks, the more absurd, the better. Art museum was robbed of their most valuable statue? 2 detectives begin the case, but the art museum’s cameras were off that day. Taking witness statements? Only two people saw the suspects, but neither person can see well without glasses, and neither were wearing them. Got a clue leading to an address? Turns out to be an ambush trap, and our detectives find out that this mystery is only the beginning to something bigger! Things like that really add to the story, and you can make them as crazy as you want, because you are the author of the story, so you can just invent any solutions to them that you want. It’s such an enjoyable thing to do. 

A tip for this prompt, I enjoy modeling my detective characters off of Sherlock Holmes and Watson from the books, which means getting to give them funny voices and make them interact in fun ways. But you can make your detectives have any personality you want! Are you more of a fan of CSI? You can make serious policemen! Prefer something like Supernatural? Make them slightly snarky and quippy like Sam and Dean! It’s your story, so the tone is 100% up to you!

Similar to this prompt, you could also use the next idea, which is….

Idea 4: “Among Us” Style Mystery / Murder Mystery

This is something I remember playing very often as a bio kid, and now, as well. Starting with about 8-10 characters, who are somehow trapped within a house, ship, etc. Someone is murdered and nobody knows who did it. People keep disappearing or dying until the suspect is found, and nobody leaves until they know who was guilty. You can set this up to be similar to something like “Clue,” or even more similar to “Among Us.” 

A tip I like for this prompt: select a character who is not guilty, but everyone thinks they are. Have them be super suspicious and mysterious, only to dramatically reveal that they are innocent. 

Another fun tip: if you want a horror movie style thing (think like slasher films), select a character to fill the “final girl” trope (doesn’t have to be female though). This is the last person left alive who must face off against the killer in a dramatic final battle. 

I like adding plot twists to these, because it adds so much fun to the story. Here are some of the plot twists I like to add to these stories:

Someone has an evil twin, they are killed secretly and the twin replaces them until the very end.

Someone in the group is working with the killer.

Someone in the group witnesses a murder, but cannot speak and is in shock. They reveal the killer at the very end.

The first person to die was of natural causes, everyone after that was just everyone turning on eachother.

Nobody in the group is actually the killer, and the house is haunted, and a ghost is causing the deaths.

Nobody actually dies, it’s all an elaborate prank on the sole “survivor” and this isn’t revealed until the end.

Someone in the group disappears and is assumed dead, but reappears at the end to defeat the killer.

These sorts of stories are super fun to make overly-dramatic, and also super fun to give all the characters funny voices or weird reactions to events!

And now…. For the last prompt!

Idea 5: Exploring a New Planet 

Maybe I’m a huge nerd, but I grew up enjoying Star Trek TNG and Voyager. My dad and I would watch whole seasons from DvD box sets we had while we ate flash boiled broccoli in the summer (because it was finally in-season!). My favorite characters were Data (from TNG), and Seven of Nine (from Voyager). A big part of my enjoyment of the show was when they would discover new planets or new life forms! 

When I use this prompt, I typically use Star Trek as a basis for things like the space ship name, crew ranks, protocols, etc. I love having characters fight over the validity of the Prime Directive, and have intense moral debates. But that’s just me kind of being a dork. LOL.

To play this prompt, I suggest setting up an area you want to be the new planet. Laying down a blanket or towel in a fun color to be the surface of the planet, then use anything and everything to establish buildings, farms, etc. Make the planet anything you want!

Next, pick your explorers, I usually default to a group of 4-6. Select a mission leader, a science person, and if you want, a galactic ambassador! 

Now, the explorers can visit the planet, being amazed by each new thing they see. You can have them make “audio logs” of their findings and take “readings” of new life forms! You can even have your explorers meet aliens and learn about new cultures and beliefs.

For extra fun, I like to have a scene or two with my explorers trying the new culture’s food. I use Monster High food props for this, mostly, but sometimes I also like to use playdough or floam to sculpt new foods for them.

You can make their adventure as perilous or as interesting as you want! Your explorers can encounter dangerous new weather patterns or plants, or they can have an enjoyable trip meeting new aliens, it’s totally up to you!

Thanks for all the support from you lovelies! We have a pretty awesome community, and it’s all because of you! Thank you for keeping OFT’s online spaces positive, uplifting, and supportive.

And, thank you again for reading! And most importantly, please remember to stay awesome and love yourself! You are amazing just as you are, and you deserve so much love and support. I hope you all give yourselves the love and kindness that you show others.

See you in my next post, video, or whatever comes next!

#agere #age regression #sfw littlespace #sfw agere #age regressor #sfw age regression #agereg #age dreaming #sfw little blog

[not-poignant]

OMG, I literally found your Astarion/Raphael fic yesterday, desperately looking for something like it. So happy someone else had the same brain worms as me XD

I was wondering if I could pick your brain a bit about what kind of direction you think you will take the fic? I was wondering if you had any plans in your head or if you are just following the vibes so to speak.

Especially with Raphael being in the pairing, I wondered if this is more of a "It turns out they are actually good for each other" kind of thing or more of a "Astarion has to find out what his life is going to be now/get over some things and Raphael will enjoy every second of making him squirm" kind of thing.

In any case, I am looking forward to reading more, thank you :)

Hi hi,

So I guess answering this would kind of be talking about really end-game spoilers, but I also don't have a plan for this story beyond Astarion/Raphael, and 'hopeful ending.'

(I mean I do have more than that, I just don't know how much of that I want to reveal at this stage, when it's only chapter 5, and this story could easily be over 40 chapters long - there's a lot of potential for change and growth that could alter the trajectory of the relationship in a lot of different directions.'

What I will say is that:

I do not consider Astarion giving into a regular non-consensual situation and just accepting it and making painful peace with it, a hopeful ending type situation. Agency is important to me in my characters. Even if he one day decides to voluntarily submit to scenes he doesn't love - that would at least be a choice. Anything done while under contract with difficult consequences will not be where the hopeful ending happens.

It's an Astarion/Raphael story, therefore the hopeful ending will be an Astarion/Raphael ending. That's just how my brain works. It will not be a 'they break up and THAT'S why it's hopeful.' However, the end may not have a conventional looking relationship. And I've written unconventional endings in relationships before (like Stuck on the Puzzle)

For me, a hopeful ending (as opposed to a happy ending) means that we have to have confidence in the idea that Astarion's life will continue to improve and get better even after the story has ended. There's now enough evidence that he has enough enrichment and potentially for happiness in his life, that he won't downward spiral like he has in the same way again. This means he needs - more support, more healing, healthier avenues for communication even if the relationship isn't healthy overall all the time/every second, and some pretty big personal realisations about what he wants in life. Hopeful ending is both 'better than where we found him, but also genuinely, when most people think on the last chapter, they think 'he's got some ways to go in healing, but I really think he's/they're going to be okay'' not just physically, but also emotionally, spiritually, mentally.

Those are the things I'm happy to reveal because that's how I feel about almost all of my hopeful endings. That's what that means to me.

I do think Raphael and Astarion can actually be good for each other, but I think we're missing huge pieces of the puzzle as to why that's true. Because we're missing so much of Raphael's post-death story, because he's deliberately hiding it.

But we'll find out more soon. At some point, High Inquisitor Verillius Receptor will visit, and then we'll find out a lot more, lol.

(Also yeah this story will be long, easily I suspect around 150k in length as a baseline - we're on an emotional journey folks! Sometimes the growth will be healthy, sometimes it'll be negative, we're going in all the directions lmao).

#asks and answers #palmarosa #thespectaclesofthor #raphael x astarion #astarion x raphael #bg3 raphael #bg3 astarion #hopeful ending #hopeful endings #a hopeful ending isn't unequivocally happy #we know he'll still have trauma #maybe he'll even still have grief about things in his life #(of course he will - his life is fucking tragic and running from it constantly isn't great for him) #it's not like 'marriage and kids' and kind of stereotypical happiness #it's more like a sigh of relief #and a feeling of confidence and trust #if i can get those feelings in the readers #like 'oh wow we made it oh he's on such a good path now' #that's the aim #and frankly i don't think any ending where astarion has been brainwashed #into being a happy captive #is a hopeful ending for astarion #even if raphael *is* kinder to him #freedom/agency matter sdaflkfjas #especially for astarion #but he will spend most of the fic under contract

[emilyssky]

War Of Hearts // JJ Maybank

PAIRING: JJ Maybank! x fem!reader

WORD COUNT: 13.7k

GENRE(S): smut, angst, fluff, fuck buddies to lovers

WARNINGS: smut [ praise, degradation, fingering, dirty talk, oral sex, choking, slapping, spanking] , mentions of violence, mentions of blood, swearing, mentions of alcohol, smoking. Jealous and protective JJ !

Author's note:Wrote this last night after finishing season 3, hope you’ll like it :)

SUMMARY: 

You and JJ have been messing around for a few months now until you try to cut it off because of your growing feelings for him that you think are one sided. A series of unfortunate events bring you face to face with unexpected fear and your relationship with JJ when you get caught up in their treasure hunt. 

I've always loved summer. Something about the warm weather, the sun, the ocean, and the salt on my skin made me feel alive. For the most part, I loved my life in ΟΒΧ. Some would say that I was born blessed, that I got both sides of the coin with my mom being a pogue and my dad being a kook but it feels mostly like a curse to me. My whole life I've never been fully accepted by either side. I wasn't t rich and snobby enough for the Kooks and never wild and spontaneous enough for the Pogues. It's not like I was on bad terms with anyone, everyone was friendly enough but ever since I could remember I felt left out, never having real friends. And if I'm being honest, it wasn't the kooks that I was jealous of, something about the pogue life pull me in. It seemed exciting and freeing in a way. When my mom married my dad and had me she knew that she wanted me to grow up knowing both sides. She wanted to offer me the chance to be the one to choose where I belong. She's big on following your heart and dreams and always told me growing up that I'll find my way and that if I follow my gut, the choice is gonna be pretty easy. We lived in Figure 8 but my mom opened a cafe on the south side, wanting to keep in touch with that side of her life. My life is a series of the same things over and over again. I like spending time alone, if I'm not at school or working my shift at the cafe, I'll probably be by the beach, reading or surfing. Sometimes I will go on boat rides with my dad or steal the keys and go by myself. It's not often that I will hang out with the Kooks, in fact, Sarah Cameron is probably the only person that I would voluntarily hang out with and actually enjoy it. And when it comes to the Pogues, everyone knows that it's just Kie and her boys. I'm friendly with all of them, occasionally have chat with or enjoy the waves together but that's about it.

Today is a day exactly like any other; I finished school and came straight to the cafe. It was not too crowded, with only a few regular customers enjoying their usual cup of coffee. I was behind the counter, cleaning the coffee machines, making sure everything was full and ready until I heard them. It's the group of kids that you hear before you see. John B enters first, pushing his long brown hair back as he laughs at something Pope is saying. I like John B, we share a lot in common and have nice conversations from time to time. He's a really fun and social person but this year was a rough one for him. His dad went missing almost a year ago, many people consider him dead by now but John B will not accept it, he still thinks he's alive, somewhere lost at sea. My mom and his dad were close back in the day before she met my dad and moved to figure 8. We used to play together when we were young up until he met his current best friends. My dad offered him a few jobs involving our boat and at the cafe, after Big John disappeared so I've been seeing him around more lately. Pope and Kiara follow right behind him. Me and Kie used to be close, but now our relationship has changed into a few talks here and there, I still consider her one of my closest friends though. Pope is fun. He's one of the few people that talks to me normally and always makes me feel comfortable at social events or parties. And lastly, my favourite pogue follows. JJ Maybank. Me and JJ have an interesting relationship. Teasing, flirting, bickering, that's his speciality with every girl in the Outer Banks, kook or pogue but sometimes I like to think that he actually enjoys my company. He was always the one I was looking forward to see but today he's the one I'm trying to avoid and have been trying for the past 2 weeks. His blue eyes find mine the minute he walks through the door, and a smirk spreads across his face.

"Hey, Y/n" John B greets me, reaching the counter.

"I'm not serving you free coffee." I immediately shake my head, knowing exactly what they want.

"Oh, come on." He frowns his thick brows, fake pouting.

I let a small chuckle at his attempt. "How many times do you think it will take for my mum to notice?"

"One more?" He offers, lifting his shoulders.

I scoff, shaking my head again.

"Come on, your mum loves me anyway." He presses.

"Yeah, but my dad not so much."

JJ places his elbows on the counter, right next to John B, and I immediately look down, continuing cleaning the coffee machine like I was doing before they came in.

"What if I'm the one asking?" He says, leaning in with that playful smile of his that I know all too well.

"Then it's defiantly a no." I fake a tight smile.

"Why so grumpy today princess?" He places a hand over his heart.

I roll my eyes and turn back to John B. He brings his palms together, begging me silently.

I sigh. "This is the last time." I point my finger at both of them.

"Yes!" They high-five each other.

"I'll bring it over." I wave them off.

I lift my eyes to his only for a second, catching the wink he sends my way as he follows John B to their usual table where Kie and Pope are seated.

I quickly fix up 4 iced coffees and walk over to them.

"Here you go."

"You're the best." John B touches my side lightly.

"You're coming next Saturday right?" Kie asks reaching for her coffee.

"What's next Saturday?" I question placing the last coffee on the table.

"We're throwing a party on the beach. It's gonna be fun." Pope explains.

"You're coming." JJ states without looking my way.

"I'll see." I nod at Kie with a small smile before leaving them to it. I walk back to the safety of my counter feeling his eyes burning on my back. The parties here at obx were always good. It's the one time that Kooks and Pogues can coexist in one place without jumping on each other's throats. Well, sometimes at least. It's fun nevertheless, all of us drinking and dancing by the beach forgetting our responsibilities and problems for a little while. I stay behind the counter, doing any task possible to distract myself but anytime I let my gaze fall his way, he's already looking.

"Thanks for the coffee Y/n." John B waves at me as they leave about an hour later.

"See you at the party cupcake." He brings two fingers to his forehead.

"Maybe." I shrug, walking to their table to clean up.

"You know I'll be miserable without you." He yells already out the door.

.  .  .  .

I don't usually work on Fridays, so after school, you'll probably find me at the beach if I'm not locked in my room. I enjoy my alone time. Riding the waves, sitting under the sun with a good book, or drawing in my sketchbook. Today my mind felt a little heavier, so I took my time, and before I knew it the sun began setting. I quickly throw my bag over my shoulder and begin to make my way back, realising that it's almost dinner time. I silently curse at myself for not riding my bike to the beach cause the walk back to Figure 8 seems dreadful. My ears perk up catching the sound of a motorcycle approaching with speed and I close my eyes hoping that it's not him but when I hear the motorcycle slowing down I know that my hope is not coming true. He stops beside me and I stop walking, turning to look at him. His hair is pushed back by the wind, he's wearing a simple white t-shirt with grey cargo pants, and his face is as pretty as always. My eyes narrow a little as I spot a bruise over his right cheekbone and it doesn't take long before I spot all the different marks and scars across his face.

He still forces a smug smile on his lips, ignoring my staring. "Having an afternoon surfing session princess?"

"What happened?" My eyes can't stop studying his face.

"Oh, you know the Kooks had it coming." He shrugs, masking his face perfectly like he always does but I know better.

"JJ." I trail off, my stomach tightening knowing exactly where he got these injuries from.

His jaw tightens. "It's nothing' Y/n. Same old, same old." I shake my head, in disgust. I can't even stand the thought that his dad walks around the OBX freely. He's such a piece of shit. "Get on the bike." He nods behind him.

"It's fine, I'll walk." I tilt my chin.

He scoffs with a smirk. "When will you stop with this whole act you’re putting on?" He waves his hand around.

I change the weight from my right to my left leg, crossing my arms. "I don't know what you're talking about." I keep my face expressionless, ignoring the way his beaten face cause my heart to tighten.

His eyebrows come together and his gaze shifts, dropping the playful act. "You're ignoring me." He states.

I'm trying.

I avoided his eyes cause I know that the more I look at them the weaker I get. It happens every time, I say that I'm gonna stand my ground and then I find myself beside him regardless.

"Look," He clears his throat, eyes moving everywhere. A weird expression takes over his features and I immediately know that he feels uncomfortable. "I don't care why you're pushing me away but can you stop ignoring me for a few hours?" He struggles to speak the words and that makes me a little warm inside. I glance at his bruised face once more, remembering all the times he came to me after his fights with his father. All the long talks we would have in order to get his mind off of it or the times I would sneak him through my window to treat his injuries.

I sigh and silently climb behind him, wrapping my arms around his waist. I feel him chuckle. "Just so you know, we're just talking."

"Sure." I can't see his face but I bet he's grinning.

He took his time, driving aimlessly around the streets of OBX. I don't mind though, I know him enough to know that it helps him clear his head, so I stay silent resting my head against his back and enjoying the ride. The sun has set and the night breeze tingles my skin in the best way. I notice that he takes the familiar route to my house.

"Are your parents home?" He yells, looking behind his shoulder.

"Yeah, I think."

"We'll have to be quiet then." He clicks his tongue.

"Like that has stopped you before." I smile against his shoulder.

"True." He glances at me again, the corners of his mouth lifting.

He parks his bike a block down from my house and he walks quietly around the back while I go from the front door.

"Hey, honey." My mom yells from the kitchen at the sound of the door opening.

"Hey, mom." I enter the kitchen, sneaking my arms around her waist while she chops some cucumbers, preparing a salad for dinner.

"Dinner will be ready soon." She smiles.

"Oh, I'm not hungry, I already ate." I brush her off, walking to the fridge.

"It smells amazing dear." My dad enters the kitchen, dropping his keys on the kitchen table.

My mom flashes a smile at my dad before turning back to me. "When did you eat?"

"I hung out with Kie by the beach and we had some sandwiches."  I quickly make up an excuse, grabbing a water bottle and closing the fridge.

"Just Kiara?" My dad lifts an eyebrow.

"Yes dad," I sigh.

"Honey." My mom scolds him.

"What?" He lifts his shoulders. "I'm sorry that I don't want my daughter hanging around boys that smoke weed, get drunk, and steal shit on the daily."

"Mark." She glares at him.

"They're not stealing anything, dad." I narrow my eyes, sick of him attacking them all the time. "They're not like that, you don't know them."

"Well, some of them are." He continues and I know exactly who he's referring to.

"You're wrong" I shake my head, lifting my hands. " and you're not gonna tell me who I can and can't hang out with." I walk past him shooting him a glare and head up the stairs.

"Y/n." I hear my mom yell but I ignore her and hurry into my room, slamming the door shut and locking it.

JJ's shoulder is rest against the open window, arms crossed in front of him with an unreadable expression. I drop my gaze to the floor, walking to sit on my bed and placing the bottle on my nightstand, feeling a little ashamed for the way my dad spoke about him and his friends.

"I'm sorry for my dad." I feel the need to say.

He moves to sit next to me, forcing a tight smile on his lips. "It's fine, we all know his opinion about the south side."

I move my head, trying to get a better look at him. "Hey, are you okay?"

"Yeah, yeah princess you don't have to worry about me." The nickname tugs at my heart almost as much as his smile.

I reach to touch his hair, pushing them back and toying with the short hair at the nape of his neck. "You know you can talk to me."

His eyes twitch with suppressed emotion, his jaw set with eyebrows frowned. "I know."  I offer him a small smile, not moving my hand. "Can you, like, talk to me?" He asks. His eyes are screaming even though he manages to keep his expression under control. "I want you to take my mind off things, just talk to me about anything." His tone is almost begging.

I bring my knees to my chest, wrap my arms around them and turn to face him. 'What do you wanna know about this time? My weird obsession with serial killer documentaries, my views on feminism, or if I put the milk or cereal first?"

His face breaks into the first real smile today and I feel a little proud. He shakes his head lightly, his eyes not leaving mine before he pulls me by the neck, smashing his lips to mine. It's like all the pain he carries and all the words he desperately wants to say are spoken by the way he moves his lips hungrily against mine. The softness of his mouth contrasts his rough breathing as his hands hold my face, pulling me closer to him. His small groan that echoes through the room and the feeling of his tongue brushing over mine snaps me back to reality.

"Jay," I whimper, pushing at his chest lightly.

His lips leave mine but our foreheads stay together. "I'm sorry." He mumbles, inhaling short, sharp breaths.

My fingers trace his bruises and my stomach twists even at the thought of how his dad created them. I hate how he grew up having to hide all this pain and I hate how he's being treated. "I don't want you to go back to him tonight." I whisper and his eyes snap to mine. "Stay with me."

His face finally breaks, and the emotion in his eyes overtakes his whole expression.

"But we're just sleeping," I lean back, pointing my finger at him. "and you'll have to leave before my parents wake up."

His eyes water a bit but a grin paints his lips as he wraps his arms around me, pushing me back to the bed.

A giggle escapes me. Damn him.

. . . . . . . .

"I'm going with Topper." Sarah touches up her already perfect makeup.

"Ugh." I groan. "What do you even see in him?" I scrunch up my nose. Sarah is the only kook that I can stand to hang out with. And the only Cameron I actually like.

"He's nice." She rolls her eyes at me, holding up two dresses, one yellow and one blue. "Stop being a bitch to him. Which one?"

I tilt my head." The yellow one obviously."

"What are you wearing?" She questions while peeling off her clothes and changing into the short yellow dress.

"I don't know if I want to go." I lay back down on her king-size bed.

"Come on, you love parties. Is it that you don't wanna go or that you don't wanna see a certain someone?" She wiggles her brows at me.

"I'm just not in the mood." I shrug, looking away but she sees right through me.

"Yeah right." She chuckles. "Cut the shit and get dressed." She throws a black shirt on me.

. . . . . 

The beach is full of people, kooks, and pogues dancing, drinking, and having fun. Big barrels of beer everywhere, stands with bottles of alcohol and hundreds of red cups here and there. It's not even midnight and everyone is already wasted. Most of the girls are in their bikinis by now, dancing like there's no tomorrow on top of giant rocks. The minute we enter the party, I go straight for the beer, pouring myself a cup. My eyes silently search the crowd for any sight of his fluffy, blonde hair, or of any of his friends. I spot Kie and Pope taking shots with a few other people and John B just a few meters again, flirting with a blonde girl but he's nowhere to be found.

"Looking for someone?" Rafe says close to my ear, catching me off guard and making me flinch away. He smiles at my reaction.

"What are you doing here?" He's one of the people that rarely joins things like this. He and his friends really don't get along with the pogues, unlike me and Sarah. I try my best to limit my contact with Rafe, Topper, and the rest of their little group but somehow they find a way to be right in my face.

"Enjoying the free alcohol." He lifts the cup to his lips, hiding his smile. "What are you doing here?"

I take a sip of my beer. "I came with Sarah."

He nods, eyeing me up and down. "You look gorgeous as always."

I roll my eyes at his compliment. "Thanks."

"You know," He leans in closer. "you're always cold towards us but when it comes to these pogues you're a fucking angel. Why is that?"

I sigh out loud, not really in the mood to deal with his whining. "Cause I can. " I offer him a smile before walking away, blending in with the dancing crowd.

It didn't take more than 4 cups of alcohol, to find myself dancing between a few half-naked girls, that are probably as drunk as I am. My body has a mind of its own as I swing my hips to the beat of some '00 song. I lost sight of Sarah half an hour ago when she disappeared with Topper, and I joined Kie and Pope and took a few shots before throwing myself between the sweaty bodies, pretending that the fact that JJ is still nowhere to be found does not affect me at all. He's a known player around the Obx, sleeping around, flirting his way through, breaking hearts left and right and I've had my fair share of it. But the game he's playing is a dangerous one, and I'm trying to protect myself the best way I can.

"Shots!." John B yells, throwing his hands in the air, holding a bottle of tequila in his right one. A few girls extend their cups for him to pour them some but I've probably dropped mine while dancing cause it's not between my fingers anymore.

I tap on his shoulder to get his attention. "Hit me!" I yell over the music and open my mouth wide.

"Let's go!" He yells pouring a shot straight into my mouth. The alcohol drips down my chin as I try to swallow, my eyes watering at the process.

"Another one." John B says and taps my chin waiting for me to open my mouth again and I do. All eyes are suddenly on us, everyone is cheering and yelling as I shallow my fourth shot in a row and I feel two hands grabbing me by the legs and lifting me higher. I throw my hands in the air, laughing as the people around me scream louder. My mind is somewhere else, and I let the carefree feeling and numbness that comes with alcohol overtake me. Until I open my eyes. I sober up in a second when my eyes find his. His on top of a rock, smoking with a few other people. A girl leans in towards him, her hand wrapping around him as she laughs at something Pope said but he stays unbothered, his eyes still on me as he lifts his cup my way with a nod and a smile. I nod back not knowing what to do before turning back to the girls I was dancing with. I continue moving to the music but my mind isn't letting me shake him off. Suddenly, the alcohol feels heavy in my stomach and the sound of my heartbeat is louder than the music in my ears. My hand flies to my mouth as I run out of the dancing crowd and as far away as I can from the people before dropping to my knees and vomiting in a bag full of used cups. I feel two hands reaching for my hair as all the alcohol that I consumed leaves my system.

"It's okay, I got you." I hear Rafe's voice over the music that has faded a bit due to the distance. "Here" He hands me a napkin.

"Thank you." I cough out, taking the napkin, and bringing it to my lips.

"Hold on, let me bring you some water."

I wipe my mouth and drop the napkin inside the trash bag.

"Here." He pushes a cup of water into my hand, tugging my hair behind my ear as I take a few sips of the water slowly. "Stop drinking so much Y/n, Jesus."

"I'm okay." I rise to my feet.

"Come on," His hand wraps around my waist. "let's take you home yeah?" He starts pulling me towards the other side of the beach.

"I don't think she's going anywhere with you Cameron." My head snaps to the right, hearing Rafe scoff at the sight of JJ. JJ's eyes twitch when they fall on me, his eyebrows coming together.

"I don't think you have a saying in what she does pogue." Rafe's hands drop from my body as he takes a step forward.

JJ's expression shifts in a second when he moves his eyes from me to Rafe, a smile spreading over his lips. "Oh I think I do," He takes a step forward as well. "And she's not going anywhere with you." His voice drops a little.

"I suggest you take a step back." Rafe doesn't back down.

JJ's eyes darken. "Or what?" He takes yet another step. "Last time I checked you're still nipping at her heels and following her around in case she pities you and gives you a chance."

Rafe lets out a growl, pushing JJ backwards but he just laughs mockingly, knowing he hit a nerve but that angers Rafe more.

I step between them before Rafe can make another move. "Stop acting like five-year-olds." I look at both of them, but they ignore me, not taking their eyes off each other.

"Hey," My hand touches Rafe's chest, forcing his eyes away from JJ. "go back to the party, I'll let you know when I'm ready to leave." I lie, knowing that it's the only way to make him walk away without creating a scene cause trying to make JJ drop this would be even harder. Rafe's eyes narrow, flickering back to JJ. I reach for his hand, softening my tone. "I'll find you." I nod, trying to reassure him.

He nods back, letting out a sigh. "Turn him down kindly babe." He says, knocking JJ's shoulder with his as he walks out.

JJ's eyes are fixated on me. "You'll let him know when you're ready to leave huh?" He says when Rafe's far enough.

"Maybe." I play along, shrugging my shoulders.

His tongue comes out to wet his pink lips, hands resting on his hips as he takes a step towards me. "Is that so?"

"Last time I checked I can go home with anyone I want." I cross my arms, trying not to let my gaze drop to his lips.

"We both know that I would never let that happen." His voice drops, his tone raspier.

"Why JJ?" I tilt my head upwards due to our height difference but that doesn't stop me from taking a step forward as well, only leaving a few inches between us.

His fingers wrap around my neck, catching me off guard. "Come on now princess, let's not play dumb." He smirks.

"I'm not playing dumb. Actually, I'm done playing." I wrap my hand around his wrist, pulling it away from my neck.

Something flashes over his eyes but doesn't stay for long. "Trust me, I'm done playing as well." He mumbles before cupping my jaw with both hands, not letting me escape and in a split second his lips crush into mine. My breath hitches as the taste of weed and beer coats my tongue but I'd be lying if I say that I haven't missed it. It's been a week since the last time I kissed him and since then I've tried to keep myself at a distance, knowing that the more I let this go on the more invested I become, and knowing JJ, it will not end up well If I do. He lets out a low moan as his tongue enters my mouth, colliding passionately with mine. My fingers grab his shirt for support, my body suddenly overwhelmed by the familiar knot in my stomach that begins to build.

"Fuck, I missed you baby." He breaks the kiss, allowing me to take a much-needed breath. I dare to lift my eyes, looking up at him through my eyelashes, only to find him looking hungrily down at me. His hands travel from my jaw, down to the curve of my waist and he pulls my body to his. "You kept me waiting for so long." He breathes out, resting his forehead on mine.

"JJ" My tone begging and warning at the same time. "We shouldn't be doing this."

"You can not name a single good reason for us not to." He says, running his thumb over my bottom lip.

"I can name a few."

His hands drop to my ass and in a swift move, he lifts me off the ground forcing my legs to wrap around his waist. "I'd rather hear other sound out of that pretty mouth of yours." He starts walking away from the party, keeping his hands secure under my thighs and crashing his lips to mine once again. He makes sure we're far enough from the crowd and behind plenty of trees and bushes before stopping and dropping me carefully on the sand. He breaks the kiss, straightening his body and reaching to peel off his white long-sleeve shirt.

"You look fucking amazing tonight." He doesn't break eye contact. "I was hard from the minute I saw you walk in." He leans back down, his eyes roaming over my body as if he hasn't seen it in ages.

My hands reach for the ends of my shirt, pulling it over my head. "Fuck." He dives hungrily into my naked chest. Sucking, nibbling, and biting. He squeezes my boobs between his palms, rolling his tongue over my nipples, making them harder by the second. His wet lips slide down my stomach teasingly as his fingers toy with the button of my shorts before finally unbuttoning it. He drags it down my legs, leaving me in my black panties, exposed and ready for him. Somehow I always find myself in this position as much as I'm trying to avoid it but the sight of him desperately fumbling with his belt as his eyes devour my body is one that I'll never get enough of.

I lift myself onto my knees, lowering my body so I'm facing his crotch. I pull down his shorts along with his boxers freeing his already hard member. A small moan escapes my lips at the sight, my mouth watering. His thumb and index finger reach for my jaw, tilting my head to meet his dark gaze.

"I want your eyes on me as you choke on my dick, okay princess?" He says and I'm aflame from head to toe. He takes his dick in his other hand, pumping it a few times before dragging the tip across my lips, coating them with his leaking precum. I keep my eyes locked on his wild blue ones as I take him in my mouth.

"Fuck" He curses under his breath as I twirl my tongue around the tip. I replace his hand with mine, taking him deeper, the size of him weighing on my tongue. I relax my jaw, allowing almost his whole member to enter my mouth. His hands fist my hair while his hips begin to thrust forward, lightly fucking himself in my mouth.

"You're so fucking good at this baby." He praises me. "Look at you choking on it, that's it." I force myself to breathe through my nose while saliva starts dripping from my mouth down to my chin. He fastens his pace only for a few seconds before, pulling my head sharply back by my hair, his dick dropping from my mouth as I gasp for air.

He groans out loud. "I missed this."

His words sink in as much as I try not to let them. It's always 'I missed this' and never 'I missed you.'

He connects our lips again, tasting himself while he pushes me down on my back. His fingers run over my clothed pussy, and that's enough to make my back arch, silently begging him for more. My body responds to him in ways that I can't explain or control. Just a touch and he has me already panting. He pulls my underwear to the side opening my folds with his middle finger.

"Ugh." I gasp.

"Shit baby, you're already dripping." He whispers satisfied against my lips. His mouth falls to the curve of my neck, sucking on my skin as his fingers begin to rub circles over my clit making tiny moans escape me. Unexpectedly, he slides two fingers inside me, quickly building a fast pace.

"Oh, my god." I shut my eyes, pleasure creeping into my lower belly.

"You respond to me so well princess." He kisses me, capturing my bottom lip between his teeth. His fingers pump in and out of me, making my breath shorter as the pleasure builds.

"God Jay, I'm gonna-" The words die in my throat and the flicker of his thumb on my clit sends me unexpectedly over the edge. My orgasm rushes over me like a wave, my body going numb for a few seconds, gasps and moans leaving my lips.

"That's it baby, ride it out." His pace slows down a bit before pulling his fingers out. He leaves wet kisses along my jaw, making my eyes fly open.

"I want more. " My tone begging with no embarrassment.

A grin overtakes his lips, his eyes shining under the dim light of the moon. "I want you on your hands and knees. " He demands.

My body moves on its own, and before my mind can catch up I'm on all four, my ass on display in front of him. He runs his palms over the skin before slapping sharply my right ass-cheek.

I gasp, flinching forward. "That's for flirting with Rafe."

"I wasn't flirting with-" 

Another slap.

"And that's for ignoring me for a week." He growls. I stay silent as he pulls my underwear to the side again. He strokes my pussy with the head of his dick, dragging it up and down my slit, teasing me.

"JJ please," I whine desperately.

He leans down bringing his lips beside my ear. "Say you're sorry for ignoring me."

I swallow the last bit of pride that's left in me, understanding that my need for him is too big, and knowing that his ego is hurt, I do as he says. "I'm sorry for ignoring, I'm sorry."

"You want me?" He presses, his tone dripping with enjoyment.

"Yes, I want you so bad, please." I push my ass backwards.

He lets out a low chuckle and I hear him rip open a condom, seconds later his head presses against my entrance and slides in slowly. We both let out a groan at the feeling. God, I missed this too.

"Ready?" He asks breathlessly after a few seconds.

I nod my head, allowing him to move his hips. He grabs a full fist of my hair while his other hand stays on the curve of my ass before he pulls out and slams back in.

I immediately gasp when he begins to thrust inside me building a fast and steady rhythm.

"God, you're so fucking tight." He groans. The sound of skin on skin fills the air and my breaths begin to come out short as I arch my back. His dick feels too good inside me, almost heavenly. The way he moves, the sounds he makes, I've missed everything.

"Fuck it's so good." I brokenly moan. His balls begin to hit perfectly at my clit, pushing me closer and closer to my second orgasm. His grip on my hair tightens and pants of air mixed with low growls leave his mouth. I'm struggling to keep my body up as a fucks me harder than ever before and the fire in my belly grows.

"I'm not gonna last long." He mumbles in my ear but the pleasure between my legs is too much, my muscles burn and I squeeze my eyes shut as I let my second orgasm wash over me, euphoria spreading at every inch of my body. My legs begin to shake the sensation too intense as he fucks me through the last of it. His thrusts become sloppier, his nails digging into the flesh of my ass.

He falls forward and I feel his heartbeat on my back. "Fuck, Y/n." He lets an animistic growl in my ear, his body stilling completely as he empties himself inside the condom. Drops of sweat fall from the tips of his blonde hair on my shoulder, while both he and I catch out breaths. After almost a minute he plants a kiss on my back before pulling out slowly. The feeling of emptiness creeps in, alongside with the embarrassment and the realisation of what just happened. I hear him pulling the condom out and throwing it somewhere, while I stay almost frozen. Now that everything is done, I can't find the strength to face him. I lift myself to my feet, my legs still a little weak but I ignore it reaching for my shorts and putting them back on. I keep my back to him and my head low as reach for my top. The sound of his belt lets me know that he doing the same. I feel a tap on my shoulder and I turn around. He holds up my shirt between his fingers.

"Thanks." My voice falters. I pull the shirt over my head and run my fingers through my tangled hair. I feel his eyes on me, burning at the side of my head. I build up all the courage that I can master and turn my gaze to him and it takes one second to regrade it. He stands there, fully dressed, his blonde hair a mess, looking at me with those eyes. Those big, blue eyes that I've grown so used to over the last few months, staring at me with so much softness, analysing. Suddenly, my body is fighting a wave of emotions.

"What?" I ask, my tone almost a whisper.

He clenches and unclenches his jaw, his eyes saying so much but his mouth, not a single word. "I'm taking you home." He states before turning around and walking away back towards the party. I don't fight him, I simply follow him to his bike. Both of us know exactly what's going on, I know he understands what I'm trying to do but he doesn't seem to understand why and I don't bother explaining. I know him. I know how he is, I know how he reacts. I know who he is and who I am. I keep my hands tight around his waist as we make the short way towards my house on his bike. I try to enjoy these last few moments with him. It's always stolen moments like these. On his bike, on the beach, hidden in John B's van, silently in my room, or in my dad's boat. And that's not enough.

.

.

.

.

It's been days since I last saw him. He left me home, with a small nod and a goodnight and I haven't seen him since then. Truth be told, I haven't worked at the cafe at all, claiming to my mother that I have a lot of homework, which is partly true. I've been distracting myself as much as I can with school and studying. Tonight is no different, I'm sitting comfortably in my bed working on my homework for Monday.

"That's it, I'm done with this boy." My dad's yelling interrupts me, catching my attention.

"Honey please, he's going through a rough time." My mom tries to calm him down. "Let me talk to Y/n, maybe she knows something."

"She better not, she shouldn't be hanging out with these boys in the first place." I hear a door slam. I have heard my dad this angry in a long time, but usually, it is always about the same things; either me sneaking around and breaking his house rules or something to do with the pogues. My dad loves my mom and accepts her for who she is but he doesn't get why she still wants to have ties with the south side and most importantly why she wants me to grow up knowing both sides. But what are they fighting about now? What boy?

A soft knock on my door snaps me out of my thoughts. "Come in."

My mom opens the door slowly., entering my room. "Hey, honey." She closes the door behind her.

"What's going on mom? Why is dad yelling?" I ask her right away.

She lets out a sigh and approaches my bed, taking a seat. "Y/n have you talked to John B at all?"

My eyebrows twitch. "Um, no not really, why?"

She doesn't appear mad unlike the way my dad sounded a few seconds ago, instead, her face falls at my answer.  "Are you sure? Have you talked to Kiara or the other boys?"

I shake my head, her questions confusing me more. "No mum, why?"

"Apparently the keys to the boat are nowhere to be found." She finally explains.

"And you think Jonh B stole them?" I lift both my brows. "Mom, come on, I mean I would expect something like this from dad but not from you."

"No, no" My mom shakes her head, reaching for my hand. "No, honey. You know what I think of him, I care about John B, I've known him since he was a child. I wouldn't mind if he took the key and had fun on the boat with his friends for a few days but you know how your dad gets."

"It's always the pogues' fault." I roll my eyes.

"Please talk to him, " She nods. "I would hate for him to lose his job because of something like this. Just ask if he took them."

I nod back. "Fine, I will."

"Thanks, honey." She places a kiss on my forehead. "Goodnight."

"Goodnight mom." I hold my smile until she closes the door. Why would John B take the keys to our boat? He knows that if he simply asked me or my mom we would let him borrow it. This doesn't seem like something he would do but then again, the only people that have access to the boat are me, my parents, and him. I reach for my phone and call John B but the phone rings and rings with no answer. I try a few more times, before trying Kie and Pope, but no luck. I stare at his number for a few seconds before pressing call, mentally preparing myself to listen to his voice after so long but just like the rest of them, he doesn't pick up.

"What the hell? Why is none answering?" .

.

.

I decided to go by the chateau after my morning shift at the cafe. I prepare myself and go over the things I'll say if by chance JJ's there as well but I stop in my tracks when an unfamiliar van comes into view packed outside the house. Sounds of glass breaking, things being thrown around, and doors slamming can be heard as I move closer to the house. I push myself behind a big tree, narrowing my eyes, trying to peer through the open window, when 2 men come into view. Big, muscular, and scary looking. Fear begins to spread through my body.

"You better not be in there boy!" One of them yells as they both throw themselves to a closed door, trying to open it. They kick and punch at the old wooden door as it slowly begins to crumble. Suddenly I see the window on the side of the house opening, and a body quickly forcing its way out of it. He turns around and I immediately recognise Pope's face. Kie follows shortly after with John B right behind them. They begin to run my way as I stay frozen, completely shocked by what's happening right in front of me. Pope's eyes lock with mine, his face taken over by a scared expression probably mirroring mine.

"Guys." He yells in a whispering tone and everyone's heads snap my way. JJ is the last to jump out the window, running behind his friends.

His eyes fall on me, eyes widening. "No, no, no." He mumbles as they all reach me. "No, not now." He grabs my arm just when a gunshot echoes through the area. I gasp, my body numbing with fear as JJ drags me along with them, my eyes not leaving the house as the 2 guys open the door and burst into the room that they guys came out of. JJ pulls me inside the small chicken coop closing the small door behind us. I bring my hand to cover my mouth, my fingers trembling. I look around taking in all of their scared faces. "W-what-" I try to say.

"What are you doing here?" JJ angrily whispers, pulling me by the arm to face him but I don't react.

"JJ now is not the time." Kie snaps at him, fear written all over her face as well. The chickens begin to make noise, yet nothing reaches me. "Do something. " She nods towards the chickens.

"Like what? Pet them?" Pope jokes while trying not to panic.

JJ reaches over taking the chicken in his hands and squeezing his little neck until it eventually stops breathing. I try to take deep breaths but my eyes stay locked on the house as the men get inside the car and drive off. Kiara takes my hand in her, tears wetting her cheeks.

"I think it's clear." John B says. "Come on." He steps out of the coop, Pope and Kiara following him.

JJ moves in front of me, stepping out as well. He extends his hand for me to take. My trembling fingers wrap around it, allowing him to pull me out. 

"What are you here?" He repeats. His eyes look at me still panicked, moving around my face almost fanatically. His hands come up to my face, pushing hair away.

"I.." I try to form a sentence but my mouth is dry. "I was looking f-for John B."

"God." He runs his fingers through his hair, moving around.

"I thought we were going to die." Kie breathes out, holding her hand over her chest. Pope moves to her side and pulls her into a side hug.

"What just happened?" I say still trying to catch my own breath. "Who are they? What did they want?"

John B looks at his friends, and I know that he's silently asking them if he can tell me. He walks towards me. "Hey, I'm sorry you had to see that." He pulls me to his chest.

"Are you in trouble?" I look up at him. "you know that my mom will help you with anything. Just tell me."

"Y/n-"

"You don't have to know everything." JJ says, his hands crossed in front of him, his face suddenly cold.

I move my eyes to him, confused by his tone and sudden energy shift.

"JJ.." Kiara sends him a careful glare.

"Why were you looking for me?"

"Um," I mumble, my eyes still fixated on JJ. "did you take the keys to our boat?"

He closes his eyes, cursing under his breath. "Yeah," he looks at his friends again, all of them looking at me apologetically. What the hell is going on? I'm used to not being involved in pretty much anything when it comes to them, but this is not a joke.

I narrow my eyes at all of them, shaking my head. "Can anyone please explain to me what the fuck just happened?"

"Look Y/n-" Pope takes a step forward but JJ cuts him off, placing a hand on his chest.

"No, she doesn't need to know."

"What's wrong with you?" Anger overtakes my tone. He's acting like an asshole right now. "Do you realise what just happened JJ? Those guys had a gun."

"I know that Y/n." He clenches his jaw, walking back towards me. "but it doesn't involve you, so just go back to figure 8 cause last time I checked that's where you belong." He gets closer to my face and I feel my whole body stiffens at his cruel words. "Stop trying to be a pogue." 

I tighten the muscles on my face, not wanting to let the tears leave my eyes but the unexpected anger overtakes my body and my hand moves across his face, slapping him hard. His face freezes, staying to the right. He has never spoken to me like that. He has never acted this way towards me and I hate it.

"Fuck you dude." I spit, shaking my head. I turn to John B. "Give me the keys." I don't care why they took them and I don't wanna know what happened anymore, I just wanna go home.

"Y/n.." He gives an apologetic look.

"Give. me. the. keys." My tone is sharp as I open my palm in front of him.

He lets out a sigh before dropping them in my palm. I put them in my pocket, not saying a word to him, and turn around.

"Y/n, let me come with you." Kie offers.

"I'd rather not." I say getting inside my car and slamming the door shut. I pull out without waiting for any of them to try and stop me and drive off, letting the tears finally fall. Tears of fear, tears of anger, and tears of hurt. He was right; I desperately wanted to be one of them my whole life but that wasn't the reason why I asked. I don't give a shit what they were doing and how they ended up in a situation like that, but it was serious. It wasn't fun and games, those guys weren't joking around and I care about them. All of them. If they're in trouble I want to help them as much as I can. My mom would understand them and she would do anything to help cause she's a pogue. But I'm not. I'm not and they'll never see me as one. They'll never trust me enough. He'll never let me get close. I know how it is and I thought that I had accepted it but clearly I was wrong cause it hurts.

. . . .

It's been 2 days and yet I'm still on edge. I still look over my shoulder every 5 seconds, and I still flinch over any slightly loud noise. I've been zoning out constantly, my mind travelling back to that day and his words. It still hurts, the way he talked to me but it was the reality check that I needed. Maybe it's time to actually stop and move on.

I wipe the last of the tables getting ready to close the cafe. The sun is setting and I can't wait to go home and relax after a long day. I move to the counter, grabbing my stuff and making sure everything is closed and in order when I hear the 'ding' the door makes when it opens.

"I'm sorry we're closed-" I turn around coming face to face with the 2 men that broke into John B's house.

Their faces hold the same smug expression, satisfied with the clear shock that overtakes my whole body. "We're not here for coffee." One of them says, his voice raspy and low.

My feet move backwards until my back hits the front of the counter. "I-I can't help you then." I shutter.

"Oh but you can," He smirks. "you can deliver a message to John B for us."  I shake my head repeatedly, my chest heavy as I try to breathe. He grabs me by the arm, his fingertips digging painfully into my skin while the other finds my neck, choking me.

"And since words won't do it for them, maybe this will. "The other one says, nodding to his partner with a smirk. The guy releases me and before I have time to catch my breath, his hand slaps me across the face so hard that it sends me to the ground.

"Ugh." It takes me a few seconds for my sense to return, my head heavy with pain and my skin burning. He grabs me by the shirt, forcing me upwards only to bring his hand across my face again. I yell in pain, tears streaming down my face as the taste of blood fills my mouth. My eyes struggle to focus.

He stands straight, looking down at me. "P-Please stop." I beg but he stays unphased, kicking me right in the stomach. Pain spreads through my body, my knees coming to my chest as I cough violently. He kicks me again, and again, his boot finding my face at some point and I scream until there's no strength in me to make noise anymore. The tears won't stop and breathing gets harder by the second.

"Tell your friend that he better give us the compass or else he's next. "He pulls my head up by my hair causing me to whine in pain. He gives me one last evil smirk before slamming it back on the wooden floor and walking away without a second glance at my aching body, his partner following.

I sob violently at this point, trying to keep my head focused and my eyes open but they're getting heavier and heavier, the world starting to spin. I don't know how long I stayed on the floor in and out of consciousness but when I heard my name being yelled my eyes snapped open.

John B kneels by my side. "Oh my god Y/n, what happened?" He says, his voice full of panic. His hands' ghost over my body not knowing where to touch me as he scans the injuries.

I don't reply but a broken sob escapes me.

"It's okay, it's gonna be okay." He slides his hands carefully under my body, my face twitching with pain. He takes me in his arms and walks out of the cafe. "It's okay, you're safe, I got you." he murmurs against my head. He lays me down on the back seat of the twinkie before hopping in on the driver's seat. His hands move fast, his eyes wild, looking back at me every 2 seconds as he drives.

"What happened?" He whispers. "W-who did this?"

I keep my eyes close and try to control my breathing but the pain is too much. "T-those men" The words that leave my mouth are barely audible but he catches them.

His hands tighten around the wheel, before punching it. He looks back at me anger written all over his face, his eyes almost watering. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry Y/n. It's all my fault."

"The compass.." I drag out, causing him to look back at me with wide eyes but everything fades again.

I feel his hands on me again. He takes me in his arms. "We're here." He whispers and I bury my face in his neck. I recognise his house immediately. He takes big steps almost running trying to hold me without causing me pain.

He reaches the house. "Guys!." he yells. "Help!"

"Oh my god, Y/n," Kie cries out rushing to us.

"What happened?" Pope tries to help John B carry me to the couch.

"Y/n." It's his voice that makes my eyes finally open and it's the look on his face when he sees me that hurts more that the pain in my body. A single sharp breath leaves his mouth before he's by my side as John B places me on the couch. I let out a small whine.

"What happened?" He whispers, dropping to his knees beside me. "What happened?!" He yells turning to John B who has his hands buried in his hair, pacing around the room. Kie appears back in the room with a first aid kit.

"Those men, the 2 men that broke in, jumped on her. " He answers.

"What?" Pope says. "Why would they do that to her? How do they even know her?"

"It's the boat, idiots." Kie angrily says passing some ice to JJ. "They saw us jumping inside it to escape them."

"Baby," JJ presses the ice to my cheek, with trembling hands. I can already feel different parts of my body brushing. His other hand comes to my head, brushing my hair back. "Baby, I'm sorry." He places his lips against my forehead. His lips tremble, and he shakes his head, eyes wide full of fear and anger. "You're gonna be okay, I'm here yeah? I'm not leaving you again." He whispers, his voice breaking.

Kie appears next to us. "Jay, let me take care of her." She touches his shoulder. "She needs help and rest."

JJ leaves one last kiss on the side of my face before getting up. "I'm gonna fucking kill them."I hear him growl before he and the boys move further into the house. Kie cleans up all my wounds and takes care of the cuts that I had on my face.

"Get some rest okay?" She smiles a sad smile at me.

"Thanks, Kie." I mumbled before drifting off.

. . . . . .

I shiver, the sudden cold air that hits my exposed skin forces my eyes open, waking me up from my slumber. The living room is dark, not a single person is here except me. I try to lift my body into a seating position, and a sharp but lighter pain spreads around my stomach and back causing me to whine.

I hear a groan from my left and I turn to find JJ's sleeping body laying on the floor. His closed eyes twitch before opening. It takes a few seconds for him to react but when he sees me awake his body shoots up, hands stretching towards my body.

"Y/n," He breathes. "hey."

I rub my eyes with the back of my hands. "What time is it?"

"Um," His hands fumble with his phone. "It's almost 3 am. You fell asleep"

"Hmm," I hum, lifting myself into a seating position. "My parents-"

"Kiara texted them from your phone that you're gonna stay at hers tonight." He says. "Take it easy." He touches my back softly. A sad expression overtakes his face when he sees me struggling to straighten my back.

"Y/n.." He shakes his head and I know exactly what he's going to say.

"It's okay, it's fine." I reassure him. JJ tends to hold a lot of guilt inside. He thinks that he's responsible for anything that happens. It seems like he holds the weight of the world on his shoulders when there's really no need.

"No, it's not." He shakes his hand repeatedly. "It's not. I can't stand seeing you hurt because of me. You did nothing wrong, it shouldn't have happened like this." His eyes drop to his hands that are resting on my thighs.

"It's not your fault." I place my hand on top of his.

"But it is. We stole your boat to escape, they saw that. And then I acted like a dick refusing to tell you anything in order to protect you and keep you out of it when in the end it's you who got hurt." His voice is filled with guilt and anger.

"Protect me from what?" I scoff. "What's going on Jay?"

His eyes soften at the nickname but he stays quiet.

"Why don't you trust me?" I mumble, mostly to myself.

"I do trust you." He defends.

"Just not enough right?" I smile a little.

He closes his eyes. "Y/n, you know it's not like that. You know me."

"Apparently I don't JJ." I raise my tone a little. "I mean I thought I did, I wanted to. I was patient and I was understanding. I listened to you and I was there. As much as you would let me at least." I go on, and all the words that I was holding inside come rushing out. "The JJ I know would not talk to me like that, the JJ I know would not disappear for days, the JJ I know would not keep secrets from me."

"Y/n-" He tries to interrupt me.

"No, I get it, I know my place. " I hold a hand up between us. "I know we're not together but I care JJ. " I admit looking at him dead in the eye. His face falls at my words, jaw tightening. "I liked it when you would climb through my window and we would talk for hours about all the things you guys had done that day and I liked it when I would sneak out after midnight and go on bike rides with you. I liked how we would surf together or how we would lay on my rooftop, looking at the stars talking about all the things we want in life. You were the one that was pushing me to join you in all kinds of things, you would always tell me that I was a pogue deep down." Tears threaten to spill but I try to contain them.

"You were the one that pushed me away," He point a finger towards me. "Since day one, since the first day we fucked, you never wanted me."

"JJ," I lift my hands to my hair, struggling to control my anger. "I was trying to protect myself!"

"For what?" He shoots back, his frustration building as well.

"From you!" His shoulders fall. "I wanted you, I've always wanted you but I know you." I sigh, studying his beautiful, blue eyes that are piercing mine. "I know better than to let myself fall and believe that this is more than it is." I say quietly.

He tilts his head, his eyes never leaving mine. "I tried to stay away from you because I couldn't stand to hold you and know that you aren't mine. Every time I would look at your face, I would see nothing but walls. We would have sex and then you would go back to being cold and wanting to be as far away from me as possible and I honestly get it, people like me don't deserve people like you."

I shake my head in disbelief. "How can you say that?"

"Cause it's true." He chuckles sadly. "Look at you and look at me." He motions between us.

"Stop." I close my eyes, unable to stand the way he views himself, I wish he could see how extraordinary he actually is.

"Y/n, I know." His gaze hardens. "But when John B walked through that door with you almost unconscious in his arms. Your body and face brushed and beaten," He twitches his face as if the image brushes through his mind and physically hurts him. "I lost it. My heart dropped. Nothing mattered but making sure that you were okay and holding you in my arms. The thought that something like that had happened to you," He shakes his head, reaching to take my jaw in his hands gently. "I can't fucking stand it. And I swear to you that I will search the whole island for these motherfuckers and I'll fucking kill them for laying a finger on you." He leans forward, his forehead inches away from mine.

A small smile creeps on my lips at his words, my heart warming instantly.

"I'm sorry about what I said the other day, all I wanted was to protect you and I'm sorry for disappearing on you. I'm sorry about all the lying and the secrets and I'm sorry I can't be what you need and deserve." His eyes move all over my face while his thumbs move gently over my cheekbones.

I bite my lip. "JJ, you're all I want. You're more than enough." I say with my whole heart, wanting nothing more than for him to see himself the way I do. "You're the most incredible person I know and it hurts me that don't see it."

"I don't deserve you." He whispers, his lips ghosting over mine. His breath becomes my breath.

"Shut up." I smile crushing my lips to his. It doesn't take more than a second for him to react, moving his mouth against mine, inhaling sharply as if I'm oxygen. I let out a low moan as JJ's lips started nibbling at mine, demanding entrance that I'm all too happy to grant. It's ridiculous how much I've missed him, the taste of his lips is enough to make all the pain disappear. Everything fades away as our tongues collide, teasing and testing each other. My hands travel to his hair, tugging lightly while he holds my waist carefully. I push myself forwards, sucking on his bottom lip before capturing it between my teeth. I can feel him holding back, he digs his fingers into my skin and releases a sharp breath.

"Y/n," He lets out a low groan, breaking the kiss.

My frustration builds more with each second passing, wanting nothing more than to feel his hands on me. I need to feel him. "What?" I breathe out.

"Maybe.." His eyes fall to my swollen lips, his mouth opening. "Maybe we should take it slow, considering what you went through the last few hours."

I shake my head. "No, I want you." I inch forward wanting to taste him again but he doesn't let me.

"Princess, trust me I want nothing more than to throw you on the couch and fuck you senseless while you scream my name for everyone to hear." He tilts his head downwards, his words making my insides hot and causing my thighs to clench together, hoping for some relief. His eyes big and wild, hungrily staring back at mine while I let my hands explore and touch his face, brushing his hair back and down his neck. My burning desire for his touch has overtaken me completely, my stomach tightens just at the thought of all of the things we could do but I know that he's right, my body still feels beaten and heavy.

"You need to rest for tonight." He takes my jaw between his fingers.

"Will you stay with me?" I'm scared that the minute we leave each other, things will go back to how they were, and what I realised after tonight and after what happened is that I don't wanna be without him anymore. I don't want to be scared anymore cause you never know what will happen.

His face breaks into a soft smile. "Lay down."

His arms felt familiar yet foreign. Like I missed the feeling of falling asleep buried in his chest, his scent filling my senses but different like something's changed.

.

.

.

.

The book that I'm reading has been getting less and less interesting with each minute passing. Maybe it's the fact that it's 10:00 pm and I'm laying in my bed, reading on Saturday night, or the fact that he hasn't called me or even texted the whole day. It's been a few days since the incident at the cafe. After we woke up that day JJ drove me back home and explained pretty much everything, about The Royal Merchant, the compass that they found, and how it lead them to the tape recorder that Big John left for his son. I still can't believe some of the things that happened to them and what they discovered. He made me promise that I won't tell a soul, something I would have done even if he hadn't asked. I haven't seen him since, mostly cause my parents have been babying me none stop. I told them what happened at the cafe, twisted around a little the actual truth, and claimed that the 2 men tried to rob the cafe but JJ and John B showed up. I haven't gone to school or done anything in general for the past few days. I've been laying low and have recovered completely but my mind has been stuck on what JJ told me. Through the days I found myself wondering what they were doing and wishing I was with them.

A knock on my widow breaks me out of my thoughts. JJ sends me a small wave. My head snaps to my door, checking if it's closed before running to open the window. He quickly pushes his tall body through the small opening, stumbling a little in the process.

"Hi" he breathes out, standing up straight.

"Hi," I giggle "what are you doing here?" I scan him with my eyes making sure that he's okay and also taking in the sight of him that I've missed so much.

"I wanted to check up on you." He says, running his hands through his hair.

My hands are itching, wanted to reach in and touch him but I don't know if that is too much. Honestly, I don't know where we stand, all I know is that I've missed him.

His eyes move around my face while he tugs his bottom lip between his teeth. My eyes catch the movement. "Come here." He mutters before reaching forward and wrapping his arms around my waist. I bury my face into the curve of his neck, my eyes closing at the feeling of his embrace.

"I missed you." He speaks so quietly that I almost didn't catch it.

I tighten my arms around his neck, silently responding. I missed him too.

"I was worried about you." I say, pulling away slightly.

"About me?" He lifts his brows playfully. "Come on have a little faith in my survival skills princess."

I slap his shoulder lightly, trying to hide my smile. "What happened? Is everyone okay?"

"Yeah, everyone's fine." He brushes me off. "I'll tell you everything but first.." He cups my jaw with his hands and presses his lips to mine. I let out a surprised sound that dies in my throat before moving my lips against his, responding. I feel him smile into the kiss and he opens his mouth slightly, allowing my tongue to slide inside. He hums as our tongues play with each other, letting his hands fall to my waist. He pulls my body closer to his, forcing me to my tiptoes while the kiss gets heavier. The sound of our lips and our heavy breathing fills the room.

"My parents will hear us." I breathe out.

"I don't care." He attacks my lips again, backing me slowly until the back of my knees hit my bed. He breaks the kiss and gives me a light push causing me to fall on the bed. He stares down at me with a smirk slowly dropping his hands to the bottom of his shirt and peeling it off his body. My eyes take him in, his chest and abs on full display. I bite my lip wanting nothing more than to reach out and touch him. He leans down, wrapping his hands around my neck, forcing my head upwards to look at him.

"Don't look at me like that." He drawls out.

I relax my face, staring at him through my lashes. "Like what?"

He pushes me down completely, my back flat against the bed while his legs are spread on each side of my hips.

He gives me a light slap on the cheek but it's enough to make my back arch and my thighs to clench together. "Don't test me, princess, 'cause I don't give a shit about your parents being just across the hall."

My hands find the bottom of my own shirt, pulling it over my head. "I don't give a shit either."

"Fuck." He dives right into my chest, his mouth nibbling and sucking on my exposed skin. My hands go to his hair instantly, guiding him to my breasts. He wastes no time, unclipping my bra and taking one of my nipples in his mouth.

"Mhh," I moan as he circles his tongue around the hardening nub. His hands hold my hips down when I try to find some relief by grinding my hips to his. His lips travel farther down teasingly, dragging his tongue over my stomach and stopping at the top of my pajama pants. His eyes shoot up, the light and hunger in them challenging me. His fingers toy with the fabric, pulling it down slowly, not breaking eye contact while I lift my hips, allowing him to fully take it off. He straightens up, his hands fumbling with his belt with his eyes glued to my panties. His breathing hardens when I open my thighs exposing myself to him.

"You have no idea how I missed you." He groans, pulling his pants down.

I blink at him with a small smile. "How much?"

His eyes darken, looking down at my figure hard. " Let me show you." He pulls me by the thighs to the edge of the bed and kneels down right in front of my core. I inhaled sharply as he wastes no time ripping my panties off of me. His eyes beamed with hunger, taking in the sight of me. He lowers himself just a little, his hot breath fanning my bare pussy causing shivers to spread through my body. He looks up, eyes narrowing playfully using the tip of his tongue to deliver a soft flick over my clit. My legs twitch slightly, which causes him to smile.

"Stay still princess." He pins my hips down again and drags his tongue over my slit. He groans against me, the vibration shooting through me while he wastes no time diving in and moving his tongue at a faster pace. Heat explodes through my veins, my toes curling at the feeling of his wet muscle absolutely devouring me with no hesitation. He sucks and nibbles, drawing and flickering against my sensitive nerves as I whimper shamelessly underneath him. My hand shoots to his hair, head falling back and my back arching when I feel not one but two fingers slotting into my entrance.

"Oh my god, Jay." I rasp out, my palm covering my mouth.

His fingers start moving violently fast inside me, filling the room with pornographic wet sounds as the heat on my lower stomach builds embarrassingly fast. "Fuck baby, you're so wet." He groans against me before moving his thumb to cover my clit, rubbing circles in a fast motion.

His mouth attaches to my neck, taking the soft skin between his lips. "I want you to come on my fingers baby can you do that for me?" He whispers in my ear.

My body lifts off the mattress, feeling myself climbing higher and higher. "I-I'm gonna-" The words die in my throat as a giant wave of unexpected pleasure crashes over me, my eyes roll all the way back to my head, my mind going completely numb as his fingers keep up the pace allowing me to ride it out.

"That's it, baby," He mumbles against my neck. I close my eyes, still feeling the tingling sensation lingering in my belly. He pulls his fingers out, the aftermath of my orgasm dripping to his palm. He wraps his swollen lips around them, testing me while piercing me with his blue eyes.

He moans lightly. "The taste of you is incredible."

"Can I have a taste?" I nod down to his visibly hard member, that's fighting against the fabric of his boxers as he straightens his back, towering over me. My mouth watering at the thought, hands inching to fill the weight of his throbbing cock against them.

A low chuckle escapes him. "I would die to feel those pretty lips around my dick," He takes my jaw between his fingers. "But there's something I want more right now." He captures his bottom lip between his teeth, reaching to pull his boxers down. His dick shoots up free hitting his stomach, my eyes flicker to the tip, red and swollen with drops of precum coating it already. He pulls the drawer of my nightstand open, grabs a condom from the ones that he left a few weeks back, and quickly rolls it over his dick. He takes both of my wrists in his hands before I have any time to touch him and slams me back down on the bed.

He pins my hands over my head. "Your hands stay there."

I nod, trying to stop the grin of excitement that's forming on my lips. The feeling of need and frustration that only he can make me feel and that I've missed so much overtakes me as he lines his dick in my entrance. His tip brushes over my clit, opening my folds before pushing in slowly.  His forehead falls on mine and we both gasp as he fills me up entirely.

"Shit, princess." He hisses when I nod my head and give him the green light to move which he wastes no time doing. He pulls out all the way before slamming back in, filling me up again with such a powerful push that it causes me to gasp out loud. His hips find a rhythm in no time, attacking me with sharp, deep thrusts that make my breasts bounce almost painfully. His forceful movements draw all kinds of sounds out of me while everything begins to fade. My ears fill with the sound of my own heartbeat and his low moans and grunts as he pushes in and out of me, stretching me out with the size of his cock. I fight to keep my eyes open, only being able to focus on his beautiful face, that's overtaken by a mesmerizing fucked out expression. His eyebrows are drawn together, drops of sweat coating his forehead while his mouth hangs slightly open. He looks breathtaking as he fucks me senseless, reminding me with each thrust that in reality, he's all I want. His hands reach for the back of my right thigh, lifting it a little gaining access to a better angle that allows him to thrust deeper. My eyes roll back, unable to contain the pleasure that shoots from my core, my hands fly to his back, nails dining to the soft flesh, earning a deep grunt from him.

"You're doing so well baby, look at you taking my dick like a good girl." He grabs my neck with his free hands, his pace quickening making the knot in my stomach tighten. I dig my nails deeper, hands tugging his hair while both of our bodies dripping with sweat but I don't care about anything except my second orgasm that approaches.

"Are you gonna come for me again princess?" He teases me, feeling my walls tighten against him. "Tell me how good it feels, and maybe I'll let you come." He demands, tilting his head downwards and tightening his grip around my neck.

I can feel my wall throbbing, tightening painfully around his dick trying to keep him inside as heat begins to spread in my belly. "It feels so good Jay, so fucking good please baby don't stop." My dignity dissolves as tears start to form at the corners of my eyes.

"Tell me I'm the only one you want." His thrusts being to get sloppy, signalling that his own high is approaching. His eyes are wild, and everything starts to feel overwhelming.

"Y-you're the only one, I only want you." I confess, my tone desperate and begging.

He connects our foreheads again, hand dropping to my clit and with a single flick of his finger, I'm over the edge. My back arches, black spots fill my vision, and an almost euphoric feeling pulses through my veins. My brain and body are overtaken with pleasure and I keep my eyes shut as JJ's orgasm hits him just as hard.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck." He buries his face in the curve of my neck, letting his low groans fill my ear. I let him ride it out, ignoring the over-sensitivity that I start to feel. His body freezes for a few seconds as he releases into the condom before collapsing on top of me. I feel his heart drumming in his chest while he tries to control his breathing. I'm still in a state of bliss, ears still ringing and heart still beating fast. We stay like this for a good minute, our sweaty bodies touching and our fast breathing filling the air until he decides to lift himself off me and fall to the side.

Silence overtakes us, letting everything that just happened sink in. He pops himself on his elbow, head resting on his hand as he looks down at me with soft eyes. His hair going in every possible direction, his lips swollen and his neck covered in marks I don't remember making.

I smile at the sight of him.

"What?" His breathing is still uneven.

"You're pretty." I think out loud.

His eyes shift, lips curving upwards. "I love you, Y/n."

The raw emotion is visible as he speaks the words, causing my heart to stop for a split second. The words I desperately wanted to hear and desperately wanted to say for so long. The skin of my cheeks tingled but I say nothing, still processing what he just said.

His face breaks into a smile, unphased by my silence. "Fuck, I wanted to say that for so long." He lets out a breath of relief, pushing his hair back.

I've dreamt about this moment, never actually believing that it'll happen, thinking that just a hookup was all that I would ever be for JJ.

I stare deep into his ocean eyes. "I love you too JJ." I speak the easiest truth I've ever had to say out loud.

His smile grows more, overtaking his whole face and causing his eyes to almost close. I reach over throwing a hand around his neck and kissing him like I've never had before. We both smile into the kiss and giggles fill the air.

"I'm in love with you." He says again, against my lips.

His phone interrupts our moment before I have the chance to say it back again.

He sighs, reaching towards the floor to retrieve it from the pocket of his pants.

"What?" He picks up, keeping his eyes on me. His face drops, eyebrows coming together. "Slow down, slow down." His gaze shifts and I lift myself to a seating position, quickly throwing my shirt on. "Okay, I'm coming got it." His body almost bounces as he paces back and forth, his free hand moving fanatically until he stops right in front of me, ending the call.

His eyes light up and a challenging smile tugs at his lips.

"What?" I ask, completely lost.

"Wanna join me on a treasure hunt princess?" He grins.

"What do you mean?" My face twitches with confusion.

"John B needs me, they found something." He begins to get dressed.

"And what? You want me to join you guys?" I can't help the excitement that spreads over my face. "What do you mean?"

"The guys are waiting for us at Kie's place." He stands up straight, all dressed and ready with his hands resting on his hips. "That's the reason I came here." He bites his bottom lip, trying to contain his smile. "To get you. They guys are okay with it, especially with everything happening with Sarah and John B. " He waves his hands around.

I frown." What's going on with Sara and John B?"

He shakes his head, reaching for my waist. "I'll explain on the way. Are you in or not?"

I look into his eyes, the deepest shade of blue I've ever seen. The eyes that I've fallen so hard for and I would do anything for. The eyes that are now silently inviting me, challenging me, and making my heart beat faster. All my life I wanted nothing more than to be like them, to feel what it's like to live life their way, and even though what happened was the scariest thing I've ever experienced I can't help but give him a small nod.

His teeth make an appearance before he takes my face in his hands, planting a kiss on my lips. "Get dressed then baby, the gold is waiting." He smirks.

I smile against his lips. I guess my mom was right; the choice is pretty easy if you follow your heart.

#obx #obx jj #obx jj maybank #obx jj x reader #outer banks #jj maybank smut #jj maybank #obx fic #obx fanfiction #obx smut #jj smut #jj fic #jj x kook!reader #jj #smut #fanfiction #john b routledge #kiara outer banks #sarah cameron #pope outer banks #outer banks jj

[vro0m]

Brocedes hasnt been brocedes all year. Its just a lot more ovi now. We got a certified nico lewis situation at merc. Toto picking the wrong guy once again. Whats new?

Okay first of all I wanna say this can't be a Nico - Lewis situation. There will never be a Nico - Lewis situation again. But I guess what you mean is there's an open, direct rivalry at Merc again. Which. Yeah sure. That's usually what happens. I'm not surprised it's happening, we mentioned it before.

(long post)

I'm not sure what you mean by 'Toto picking the wrong guy once again'. If you mean in the context of hiring George, I disagree because George is a very good driver. If you mean in the race, I highly doubt Toto is the one making the strategy calls in the middle of things. At the very most, the strategists tell him the options and he might green-light one of them.

They've been having strategy issues for a while now. That's also something we've talked about before. If anything, I'd say the issue lies with the strategy team rather than Toto or George. We've said the bad calls were hidden by the good car performance before but also I do think it's gotten worse. Back when it was announced that Vowles was leaving, I said not directly replacing him was bullshit. They claimed the rest of the department would just divide Vowles' workload between themselves. Toto said they'd been doing it already during the '22 season (when did the strategy issues ramp up? idk). What I said at the time was "someone is going to have to make the final decision on strategy" and "otherwise it's not gonna work". It might just not be working.

One thing I'll give credit to George for is that he's trying things. Hasn't there been a convo in the last few weeks with people (including me iirc) saying Merc is too conservative with the strategy? That they need to stop acting like they're at the front, defending rather than behind, chasing? Also isn't it kinda boring when the team doesn't give the car that's qualified behind a chance and only uses it to support the other? (Also with his quali performances lately, wouldn't that do more harm to Lewis than George?) I guess it's just the way being a fan goes, but I feel like every race weekend I see fans of either driver defending what or complaining about what they were complaining about or defending the previous race, depending on who they're rooting for the most. It's okay when it's their blorbo only (which again : just being a fan).

Anyway props to George for being a driver, and asking for more. That's his job. Sometimes it annoys me ngl. Sometimes I feel like he's acting too entitled during the races. But as I also said before, it's not particularly unexpected from a young driver. Lewis was really not that different in his days lol. They all have a chip on their shoulder and they are all essentially starving egotistical cunts. The older ones might just have learnt to hide it slightly better through the years. Slightly. Is Lewis being more of a team player? On track, probably so, props to him for that. Don't know how long it's gonna last in these conditions though, given that he's also a starving egotistical cunt. Off track, he's complaining very loudly and unsubtly about not being prioritised by the team in a not-so-great way imo. I'm repeating myself yet again but it's not as easy as just saying here's what needs fixing with the car, then claiming they're not listening to him when it doesn't suddenly work. Merc is truly fumbling with the development, and patience is not Lewis' greatest virtue lol. He's clearly getting frustrated with the performance, understandably so. I'm simultaneously pretty sure that's true for the whole team, not just him. So him saying they're not doing their best and voluntarily just not doing what he wants is probably not helping.

I do think that the team is gonna have to find a way to make it work between them two on track before they take each other out or straight up disobey team orders out of hunger or frustration. But well. Do I have to link the essay again? (Sorry for bringing it up 10 times a week.) It's not that easy managing intra-team rivalries and I see some people claiming they should pick a n°1 driver but how? Right now, Lewis and George are on par in quali (8-8). George has less points for sure but you also gotta take into account that he's had four terrible races in the year, not always by his fault (although sometimes yes). Outside of these four races, their results are very similar. This is not a Max-Perez type of gap by far. Lewis is most probably not gonna stay for 10 more years despite what he sometimes likes to pretend, George might. I'm still rooting for Lewis first and everybody else second but if you look at this realistically, it's not as simple as saying to George "look we're betting on you for the future, someday, but until Lewis retires you'll always be a second thought to us. But you know, still stay with us and take it lying down. Toodles!" He's completely right about it, but it's easier for Lewis to say "we're fighting for the team not for driver points" when he's the one ahead in the standings. Because what? You always always have to do better than your teammate. (Again, sorry for bringing it up constantly.)

In some way the issue with both of them is impatience. Lewis is impatient to have a good car again and he's starting to somewhat take it out on the team which isn't ideal. For all they looove saying we win and we lose together, that's not a supportive behavior claiming publicly they're just not listening to him. George is impatient to get track position and to beat his team-mate and he's rushing the racing too much, making rookie mistakes in the process (see Singapore) and demanding sometimes more than his due during races.

So yeah I think they need to rein them both in — one off track, one on track — but also without rejecting all new ideas and all questioning, both when it comes to the car and when it comes to the race strategy. It's not gonna be easy, but it's definitely gonna be very interesting.

#f1 #lewis hamilton #george russell #2023 #2023 japanese gp #essay #vro0m's asks

[renoed]

unintended consequences | s. kaiba

❥ — PAIRING seto kaiba x gn! reader

❥ — SUMMARY you unintentionally set yourself up with Seto and realise that pretending not to have feelings, while you’re simultaneously pretending to date, is very messy

"You need a date and I'm available, it's not a big deal," you shrugged, chewing on the end of a lollipop stick.

"I don't need a date, I'm just expected to have one," Seto let out an exasperated sigh, running a hand down his face, unwilling to meet your gaze.

"From who?" you chuckled, taking the lollipop stick out of your mouth and bending it in half for no reason in particular, "Because I know Mokuba knows you can't get a partner to save your life."

The brunet sighed again, letting his head drop onto the table you were both sat at, "the who isn't important, you should know that by now".

This was the first time you had been willing to go to one of Seto's rich people events, but the implication of pretending to be dating had resulted in him firmly declining. You weren't sure what you were expecting, but you couldn't help feeling slightly disappointed at his rigidness. It made sense, being apprehensive of bringing you into his (practically otherworldly) social sphere just for the sake of keeping up appearances - but, as far as you were aware, rich people only cared about keeping up appearances. And rumours, if Mokuba's constant stream of gossip was anything to go by.

"Well I, for one, think it's a good idea," you hadn't heard Mokuba enter your apartment, his lanky figure coming into view as he leant on the door frame, "people are going to start thinking things if you never get romantically involved."

Judging by the way Seto's shoulders tensed from his younger brother's words, 'people' was much more specific than it seemed. Mokuba brought you into the conversation before you had the opportunity to ask who he was talking about, "don't you think you deserve to go to one of Seto's fancy events? Especially with all the shit he's making you deal with,"

"All that 'shit' is done voluntarily, Mokuba," Seto grumbled, head still planted on the table's surface. He wasn't lying, you had visited Seto once and realised how bad he was at making time to look after himself, so you took it upon yourself to make him lunches, do some of his shopping and other little household chores. Occasionally you got a random call at 3:00 AM asking you to go out and pick up some paperwork from his apartment and take it to the office (or something similar), but he had always made it up to you in some way. You quite liked feeling needed, especially by someone who refused help every time it was offered.

"I mean, I'd quite like the excuse to dress to the nines - assuming that's what happens - but if he doesn't want me to go then that's fine," a little white lie wasn't a big deal, right?

"It's not that I don't want you to go," you heard Mokuba snicker at his brother's sharp reply, "I just don't think you'd like the atmosphere."

"That's true, imagine 100 Seto's in a room— that's what those events are like," Mokuba grinned at you, moving from his place in the doorway and into your kitchen, where he began raiding your cupboards, "I don't think anyone else could pass as your date though, Seto."

The comment sparked a small sense of pride in you at the thought that Mokuba thought you'd be a convincing couple, even if his brother didn't.

The CEO lifted his head from the table, straightening himself out in his seat. Sometimes you forgot that he was tall (due to how much he slouched around you) on top of being handsome, smart and rich. The whole package, one might say.

His eyes settled on yours, gaze strong as his jaw tensed for a moment before he spoke, "it's your choice, you'd be doing me a favour but-"

"I'd love to," you almost slapped your hand over your mouth, embarrassment seeping through you at the display of eagerness, "but you'll make sure I, like, act right, right?"

Mokuba burst into boisterous laughter just as Seto opened his mouth to respond, walking over and slinging an arm around your shoulders as he tried to calm his amusement, "you'll be eaten alive if you talk to all his upper-class friends like that! Like- uh- like, like- um, basically, right? Pffft!"

"They're not my friends, just important people," Seto rolled his eyes at the younger Kaiba, who was still snickering.

"So you're gonna say they're not your friends but not that they won't eat me alive? Who are these people!" you knew these events were important, but would you really be scorned so aggressively for even speaking with the wrong grammar?

After stepping into the extravagant venue you quickly learned that yes, you'd be scorned for everything you did by the socialites surrounding you. If you hadn't been clinging onto Seto's arm then you were almost certain that you would have fallen face-first onto the concrete outside after having been given your first dirty look of the night.

"Ignore them," Seto had lowered his voice, leaning towards you so his lips hovered at your ear, "chances are, every woman who scorns you is simply jealous of where you're stood".

At his hushed voice and extreme proximity, you were once again glad for being on his arm otherwise your knees may have given out.

"Confident, aren't you?"

You would be as confident as he was if you felt you looked even half as good.

You had seen Seto in a suit before, having helped him get ready for some of these events or seeing him arrive at your apartment in need of someone that would listen to him cuss out the people he was surrounded by.

For whatever reason, he had taken the time to wear a waistcoat with his suit and it couldn't be described as anything less than divine. The cotton material was pin-stripe, accentuating both his waist (which you were slightly jealous of, you couldn't lie) and his slender figure, he had also slicked back his hair, although a few strands had fallen loose.

"They don't want me," he whispered back, taking your attention away from ogling at his appearance, "they want the financial security that being married to the CEO of Kaiba Corporation would offer them".

The people that surrounded you, Seto included, seemed to be so sure of themselves and their futures - to be thinking about marriage was almost scary to you, did you even want to get married?

Pulled away from your thoughts, Seto gently squeezed your hand before detaching himself from you, "I ought to make the rounds, do you mind just waiting for a bit?"

You nodded, watching as he strode over to a group of suited men who immediately made space for him in their conversations.

Seto was so different in this setting. You had become accustomed to a man who over-worked himself and came to you in a huff when plans didn't go his way, he played your stupid video games and fell asleep on your couch with documents still clenched in his hands. This Seto held no trace of the one you were used to, eyes sharp and body tense as he exchanged niceties with people he wouldn't even glance at in other situations. It was impressive, really.

"You came in with Mr. Kaiba, right?"

"Oh," turning around (slightly unsteadily) you were met with an unfamiliar face, probably only a few years older than Seto but marked by stress wrinkles and tired, baggy eyes.

"Sorry for surprising you, I just wanted to come and say hello."

You were totally out of your depth, talking to a man in a pristine white-tie suit while you played dress-up as a member of the upper-class.

"Hi," you uttered, forcing a polite smile, "I did come with Seto, yes."

"You know, he's never brought someone with him to one of these events," the man's smile widened, yet any sincerity was lost as he did so, "it's a shame he managed to snap up such an attractive individual..."

Learning closer towards you, one of his hands left his champagne flute and rested on your arm. It felt dirty, as though he were trying to mark you as his own possession.

"Are you just with him for the money? If you are then I'm sure that I could make your evenings much more... exciting."

In an attempt to stop yourself from slapping him, you clenched your fist, digging your nails into your palm and gritting your jaw, "I appreciate your offer, sir, but there's really no need. I-"

"I'm afraid there's been a misunderstanding," a warm hand placed on your shoulder immediately scared away the man's dirty grip on your arm, "a rather large misunderstanding, at that."

When you turned your gaze to Seto behind you, his eyes were glacial as they bore into the older man's, lips ever so slightly quirked up into a deadly smile. His hand shifted from your shoulder down to your waist, pulling you into his chest.

"I think you should leave," he spat at the man, eyes not leaving his figure until he had retreated from the room.

You hadn't realised your entire body was tensed up during the situation that had just occurred but, seeing him leave, you relaxed into Seto, resting your head on his shoulder and muttering out a thanks.

"We can go home, if you want," he offered, his free hand finding a place on the side of your waist he wasn't already holding.

"No, I want to stick it out," you shook your head, stepping away from him and trying your best to give him a determined look.

His lips gently tugged up, clearly holding back a smile, "on one condition: you don't leave my side for the rest of the night".

You didn't bother correcting him that ‘actually, you left my side!’ and simply continued your evening, arms interlinked and smile smug as you swanned past people who thought they deserved to be at Seto's side as opposed to you, some random friend of his.

By the time you and Seto were walking into your apartment, the midnight hour had long passed, building entirely silent except for your creaky floorboards and hushed whispers,

The silence was broken immediately when your front door was closed.

"I can't believe that pig," Seto scoffed, falling onto your couch and undoing both his tie and his top button, "absolute scum."

"It's fine Seto," you assured, rummaging through your cupboards for two mugs so you could make cups of tea, "you were my knight in shining armour anyway, right?"

"I don't want people looking at you like that."

The statement made you freeze, had you not put the mugs down you may well have dropped them on the tiled kitchen floor, "what do you mean?"

"People in that room were looking at you like you were their next meal , I don't- I hated seeing them look at you like that," you weren't sure whether you were more surprised by the confession or the fact that Seto Kaiba stumbled on his words.

"I don't know what you're trying to say, Seto?"

"Fuck," he hissed, closing his eyes to take a breath before standing up and walking over to you, "I don't want to pretend to be an item. Does that make sense? I couldn’t care about any of the people trying to marry me for a business deal or financial security— it’s only you.”

“I’ve wanted you to say that for a while now but, man, actually hearing it-”

You were cut off by Seto’s lips pressing against yours for barely a second. They held a hint of lingering champagne and a cherry lip balm you had lent him months ago and never taken back. It was short and sweet and almost shy, a feeling you didn’t realise Seto was capable of.

A beat passed as he pulled his face away from yours, eyes drifting away and cheeks flushing with a rosy hue.

“You talk too much sometimes.”

[masterlist]

#seto kaiba #kaiba #kaiba seto #x reader #seto kaiba x reader #kaiba seto x reader #yugioh #yugioh x reader #reader insert #seto kaiba yugioh #yugioh seto kaiba #yugioh kaiba #yugioh seto #kaiba yugioh #yugioh kaiba x reader #yugioh seto kaiba x reader #renoed #renoed; yugioh

[slashingdisneypasta]

Oh my lord, I just saw a thing on Pinterest that said: Of course I cum fast- I'm a busy man. I have places to be.

And first of all- hysterical. 10 out of 10. This man will not be shamed.

Second of all, of course- Here are the Horror Men I think would abandon you after cumming themselves VS The ones that would never leave you high and dry like that (Indented):

Warnings: Orgasm denial, selfish fucking/loving

(Most of) These men in this post:

Animal The Cannibal: If Manny calls on him I bet he would go 😅 Sorryyyyy.

Billy Loomis: He likes the feeling of you cumming around him too much for that. Don't get me wrong- he is a pretty selfish lover. It's just that, part of his pleasure happens to come from yours.

Bo Sinclair: Nahhhhh. It's not that he's wanting to be kind to you- he just thinks it's a mark of a sissy if he can't get his lover to cum for him. It's for bragging rights.

Bubba Sawyer: Yeahh... sorry Y/N. If one of his brothers call on him he will ALWAYS go.

Candyman: Look, its not always!, so don't get me wrong- Daniel is a good lover. I'm sure he is. But at times he just... doesn't have the time 😅

Captain Spaulding: Sorry doll, he's got like 3 insane middle aged children running about not cleaning up their messes and he's gotta get on that shit XD

Chop Top Sawyer: If you've got his attention, which you certainly do if you're engaging in sex with him, then he's all yours. He's all for you.

Chucky Lee Ray: He's full of bullshit but he is also quite busy so... take this as you will.

Dr Suave: Ain't nothin' gonna keep him from the face you're gonna make sweet thing... (*Cough* Sweet talker)

Drayton Sawyer: GENUINLEY REAL BUSY!! He'd stay if he could!! Don't sulk though, he'll get pissy at you.

Freddy Krueger: Damn, you're waking up! Well- Goodluck!~ (This asshole)

Harper Alexander: This man is Buckman's bitch- he literally pimps himself out for him 😅 So... yeah... Maybe you could talk to Buckman? Ask him not to call on Harper during the hours of 5-8pm On Friday Nights please??? 😆

Inkubus: Not his style.

Jack Dante: It depends on where his head is. It's hard to keep him in one place for long- if he's got his head in the clouds, his show is on, or he's got 'work to do', he'll literally just take care of himself and then fuck off. (If you manage to hold his attention though he WILL go until you fall asleep and then be there waiting when you wake up again. Stamina for days, I swear).

Jason Voorhees: The chances are, if you've gotten Jason to engage in... the act!!... then its gonna be all about you, anyway. He might not want to cum. It's in his nature to take care of the people he loves, anyway. So it's kinda the other way around, here... but voluntarily.

Jedidiah Sawyer: Too sweet. Plus, without a family shooing him this way and that anymore, he's suddenly got so much more time on his hands! Haha.

Jerry Dandridge: If he's sleeping with you his full attention is on you, and very little will have to power to stop it.

Kieran Wilcox: I love the idea that this too-cool-for-school, bastard guy- has really bad stamina (: So (: Yeah (:

Leslie Vernon: This asshole 😅 He's like sorry sweetie, I have preparations to do, *Forehead kiss*, love you so much, see ya! (He's being genuine, too. This is not a line because he's being lazy or selfish- He gets tunnel vision something fierce).

Lester Sinclair: I swear he hates leaving you unfulfilled, he really really hates it, but sometimes he just needs a little something to keep him happy before going to see his brothers and he doesn't have time to take care of you. He will when he gets back!! He promises.

Max Grief: He just wouldn't wanna leave you displeased. He wants to make you happy (:

Mayor Buckman: This one genuinly makes me laugh XD This man, oh my lord. Someone will knock on the door and he'll be OFF- forgetting in his eagerness to be do Town Duties that he first has duties to you goddamnit!-

Mental Manny: Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhh what a dick. I'm sorry, but a dick appointment with Manny is just that- an appointment. And like any asshole with an appointment book he will decide once he's got what he wanted out of the transaction that oh, sorry, time is up! He has to go preach to some devotees for an hour. Bye sweetheart!~

Michael Myers: You just know he would. He does not care.

Mickey Altieri: Just not a selfish lover. It's equal with him.

Midnight Man: He might think its a game... 😅

Monty Hewitt: Well fuck, who knows what Hoyt might saw off him if he ignores him this time?? Please believe him when he says he wants to stay though, he really fucking does.

Otis B Driftwood: 'I'll go around back and take control, like I always fucken do'- Otis has clearly got a complex for being the Big Man in Charge, yes. And this is part of the reason he will leave you high and dry... the other part though is him being a DICK.

Patrick Bateman: Like Michael, he doesn't care. You can finish up yourself while he gets his keto dinner started.

Pennywise: I feel like with Penny its marathon sex or it's nothin', so yeah you're gonna cum. Do not fear.

Rocco The Clown: No way in hell will anyone ever tear him away from you. Oh, no. He (And I) would like to see them try.

SHERIFF HOYT: BECAUSE HE'S SHERIFF HOYT. HE IS EXACTLY THAT PINTEREST QUOTE.

Stu Macher: Would also genuinely say that 😅 Will answer every beck and call of Billy's and so thinks he's a very busy man. Call him back though and he probably will listen to you. Sorry Billy.

Stuart Lloyd: Okay- this man has probably not had sex for a LONG time- if ever. So yeah- even the muse gets ignored during that time XDD 😅 He~ is~ desperate (:

DBD The Clown: Sometimes he's too tired, which is understandable I suppose, but the asshole part?? He giggles about it. I mean, after that he coughs because he has not taken care of his body, but first he definetly giggles =_=

DBD The Deathslinger: He ain't as young as he once was- you just gotta give him a moment to breath XD Usually. Sometimes he will just smirk at you and leave, though. Cuz he's an EVIL COWBOY.

The Djinn: Not his style- Part 2.

The Man: He just would =_=

The Taxidermist: Like Stuart he is has been very dry for a very long time and he is NOT about to mess up this chance.

Thomas Hewitt: I would say he's the same as Bubba... but Thomas is a little tougher. Unless Luda Mae tried to call him away... you're good. He'll always finish you off before answering anyone else. (And Luda Mae wants grandbabies too much to pull him away XDD )

Vincent Sinclair: Sex is a whole night with him. He will have planned to have the whole evening and through the night without an interruption, so you don't run into any problems like this ^^

Winslow Foxworth Coltrane: Nahhhhhhh. He's likin' what's going on here too much. Not even Otis on cocaine with a gun will separate him from you.

#Horror Villains #Horror Villains x Reader #Slashers #Slashers x Reader #Winslow Foxworth Coltrane #Foxy Coltrane #Vincent Sinclair #Thomas Hewitt #Taxidermist #Walter Harris #The Man (Hush) #The Djinn #DBD!Deathslinger #Caleb Quinn #DBD!Clown #DBD!The Clown #Kenneth Chase #Jeffrey Hawk #Stuart Lloyd #Sheriff Hoyt #Charlie Hewitt Jr #Charlie Hewitt #Rocco The Clown #Pennywise #Patrick Bateman #Otis B Driftwood #Monty Hewitt #Michael Myers #Mickey Altieri #Mental Manny

[9w1ft]

Being a gaylor/kaylor is hard. You speak the closest to truth and then Taylor proves you wrong by doing something opposite to please the hetties. Then you are called losers and liars. One thing for sure that Taylor doesn't care about Gaylors/Kaylors at all. She CONDONES the homophobia and bully towards us. Always has been. After the 1989 prologue, Travlor stunt, always in the past. And will do in future. Sometimes I feel like she hates us so bad and always throws us under the bus. I wonder why we are still here. There is nothing positive about being a gaylor. If she wants to stay extremely closeted and parade her bf as the straightest women alive, then what is the purpose of flagging just to prove us fool on a larger scale. Does our existence bother her?? It doesn't seem that she like us. I just wanted to know from someone experienced.

hm, i dunno. i’ve felt very loved by taylor and karlie!

i think so much of how one might feel is based upon self-imposed rules. if you change the way you expect taylor to act, or how you vocalize how you expect her to act, maybe 75% of the frustration one might have is resolved.

i think condone is a pretty strong word to impress upon taylor. i think people have all gone through enough cycles to see what taylor does and doesn’t do in reaction to fandom behavior but i think a lot of people refuse to ask themselves why she always acts the way that she does, and people also refuse to change the way they comport themselves, but still act the same way while expecting a change to come from taylor.

even in the way you wrote your anon, you’re making a lot of assumptions about why taylor does things, and i don’t mean it as a criticism of you personally. i understand why you write it out like that because i think it’s a popular way of thinking. but i think you’re setting yourself up here. for example, you describe a dynamic of taylor flagging and then taylor bearding. maybe she’s not queer flagging for us, maybe she’s just being herself! and bearding to compensate for that, because for some reason she doesn’t want to be out right now. i think a lot of people say taylor doing gay things is flagging because they’re trying to prove that she’s gay (umbrella term) or that she’s trying to tell everyone that she’s gay. that’s voluntarily setting a test up for people who have hate in their hearts to knock down.

i’m not talking in ideals here. in a vacuum, in an ideal scenario, there are things that would be more “right” or “just” or “fair” for taylor to do — i am just not so sure if it’s wise for people to keep trying the same things and expect different results. especially after songs like anti hero and dear reader were put out in the world. so i dunno, maybe try different things, or change the conditions of your own environment, etc. you have the power to tinker with your own experience of what is going on.

i don’t think this is kind advice for a perfect world and im sorry if i sound cold or heartless. sometimes it pains me to see people set themselves up to be angry so i’m just trying to be a little more practical with my response. i still think there are ways to make this all work for you or anyone personally, but i think it requires you the individual and not taylor to make changes. that’s a choice that’s ultimately up to you the individual to make.

i hope everyone can find a balance that works for them, or a pastime that is a better net positive for their life!

[veliseraptor]

☕️ Golden core reveal and what it means for the two prides of Yunmeng

took a while to get to this because I needed to sit down and take a minute about it. been a bit since I got in my yunmeng shuangjie feelings but that just means it's a good time to get back in them eh

this is one of those things where I'm like...there are so many ways this could go from where it ends in canon, which is one of the things I find so fascinating about it, and why it's so interesting to pick at. because if we're talking about the side of it in canon, namely the fact that Wei Wuxian gave up his golden core for Jiang Cheng, then...that really does detonate a bomb in, particularly, Jiang Cheng's conception of a lot of things. it rearranges the way he has to perceive a whole lot of stuff from before Wei Wuxian died in a very painful way, changes the context of what he thought he understood, and specifically does that years after the fact at the point when he's had a long time to figure out how to come to terms with everything that went wrong.

in the face of tragedy, people like to make sense of it somehow, and Jiang Cheng I think spent a solid amount of time trying to make sense of what went wrong, and when, and where, and why, and came to his own conclusions about all of those things based on the information he had. and part of the way he decided to cope with it is, I think, deciding that his relationship with Wei Wuxian decayed because Wei Wuxian didn't care about him enough to stay; that ultimately Wei Wuxian cared more about the Wen, or himself, or demonic cultivation, than he did about Jiang Cheng (or Jiang Yanli). and he operates with that assumption when Wei Wuxian is dead, and he continues to operate with it when Wei Wuxian comes back.

and then he finds out that whoops! your brother loves you! so much so that he destroyed himself because he thought he had to in order to fix you! and that's, you know, a lot on its own, but it also forces a perspective shift on a tectonic level that rattles Jiang Cheng all the way to his core.

but I think he sort of comes to the conclusion, or at least somewhat the resignation, that it's too late now. things have gone too far and changed too much to mend what's broken, and I don't think he necessarily knows where to start; on the other side of things Wei Wuxian is tired and the reveal rips open some old wounds for him, too (though I think not quite as many; he's not dealing with the same perspective shift). I think he just wants to move on, not in the sense of "doesn't want a relationship anymore" but in the sense of "doesn't want to keep dwelling on the past," and he's in a position where that's easier to do, in some ways, than it is for Jiang Cheng.

I wrote in everyone else is spring bound:

“I told you,” Wei Wuxian said slowly. “It’s in the past, now. You don’t need to-”

“For you it is,” Jiang Cheng said. “For you it’s history, another life, whatever. For me it’s-” Inescapably present. There, inside me, under my heart, sustaining me. “-not.”

and that I think is part of the problem: the disjunction between a Wei Wuxian who wants to leave it behind and Jiang Cheng, who needs to process it.

none of this is to say - I hope obviously! - that there's no way for them to figure it out, or that they shouldn't, or don't want to, etc. etc. just that for all there's an idea sometimes that truth clears the air or whatever and makes it easier for them to approach each other...while that's not not true in this case I think it also in some ways presents its own new challenges.

as far as the other half of the golden core hot potato game...I go back and forth on whether it would help. I don't think Jiang Cheng would ever voluntarily or intentionally tell Wei Wuxian about his choice to sacrifice himself to the Wen; there are a lot of reasons for that but I think one of them is that to him it would feel pathetic and petty, like he was saying "see, I made my sacrifice too, so you should still love me" or something like that. if Wei Wuxian found out somehow...I don't know. I think it would be complicated and messy and painful and very fun for me to read about but I think in the long term it would depend on how Wei Wuxian reacted to that knowledge, and I can see a lot of different ways he might go with it.

wow this got long. well like I said been a while since I got in my yunmeng shuangjie feelings but I've still got em. guess I should go back to trying to finish that fic I was working on. once I can write again.

#conversating #shockingheaven #jiang cheng #wei wuxian #the sad queer cultivators show #aggressively headcanons #opinions meme #lise memes