#like some people i’ve never interested with them EVER but they still asked me if they looked good and i actually had the courage to fix it f
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yes, i'm ready (to fall in love)
── ˚₊✩‧₊ genre: smut, fluff, mild angst
── ˚₊✩‧₊ synopsis: after reader is persuaded into putting herself back out there by long time friend, shoko, she successfully ends up scoring a date. unbeknownst to her, though, the gods have different plans—and one of them seems especially interested in her relationship with ex-husband, gojo satoru.
or in other words: a failed date results in a night of passion amongst former lovers.
── ˚₊✩‧₊ contents: 13.5k words, ex-husband!gojo + co-parent!gojo, slight dub-con (alcohol use), dumbification, overstimulation, vaginal penetration, unconventional form of contraception (pull-out method - don’t do this), pussy eating + one oc for the sake of plot
── ˚₊✩‧₊ note: i know this is really long and most people don’t have the attention span for it but PLEASE give it a chance! this is literally the longest piece of fiction i’ve ever written and i’m really proud of it :(
songs to listen to for best reading experience: donny hathaway - i love you more than you’ll ever know barbara mason - i’m ready partynextdoor - showing you bryson tiller - been that way
After you divorced your ex-husband, and decided to devote all of your time to being a mother, you never really considered getting back into the dating world. Not that you didn’t eventually want to settle down with someone new, but the dating world now was just so–different.
Different in the sense that meeting people organically was becoming increasingly difficult. It wasn’t like how it used to be in high school or college, and it really didn’t take that much effort then to get a man’s number by the end of your outing.
When you were in your early twenties, a brush of your hand on a man’s arm would’ve worked. An ‘accidental’ bump into someone at a grocery store or cafe might’ve ended in a quick lay. Using these tactics today, though, might earn you some weird looks–have–earned you some weird looks.
You’re on call with a friend from college when you begin recounting something embarrassing that happened to you recently. At first, the conversation started out about all of the professors you would’ve slept with (if given the chance), but then, one thing led to another, and she asked you something that made you wince:
“‘How’s your dating life been since, you know, Satoru?’”
There’s a heavy silence from your end, and she almost thinks you hung up.
“I mean, if you want to share,” she splurts, attempting to approach this gently, “I know that after the divorce, I wasn’t there for you like you needed, but I’d like to make up for that–if you’d let me.”
Shoko’s always been like that. Blunt and charismatic, but gentle and zephyr-light in the way she cares for those closest to her. It’s a trait of hers that you admire, because not so many people would care to treat your heart with such fragility.
“No, it’s okay. You can ask, you know, it’s not this secret thing,” you start, sighing before continuing, “it happened, and it was a mutual decision.”
Shoko hums on the other side, “Well, I’m still sorry. I let us go without talking for far too long…”
“Well, I accept your apology, even if it’s unwarranted. Like I said, it was mutual and…there wasn’t really an intense grieving period for me? The only thing that hurt me is that you distanced yourself. I mean, the girls did miss their aunt Shoko…” you say, trying to make her feel bad but not too bad.
“I know, I know, I’m a bad aunt,” she jests, then the tone shifts to something serious. “I think I was just scared because both of you were my best-friends. I didn’t want to ‘pick sides’, but I see now that it was a mutual decision, so I’m assuming you two are on good-terms?”
Again, you pause, “I mean, yeah. Satoru will always be my best friend. We may not be together romantically but he’s such an integral part of my life, I couldn’t do this–all of this–alone.” After you say it, you feel a weight being lifted off of your chest that you didn’t know was even there.
You think nobody would understand if you told them this. You think they’d question how a person could divorce someone who’s supposed to be their best-friend. And with the way you describe it, they’d probably think you were still in love with him. But Shoko’s different, she gets it. Which is why saying it to her came so easily.
“He is a great father,” she chimes in, “but you two rushed into it so quickly, I don’t think either of you had time to discover yourselves after college.”
Although she can’t see it, you smile. Because she gets it. Even if time did place itself in between the two of you, she was there for most of it, when things were still touch-and-go. When things were fresh, and clumsy.
“Exactly, that was our biggest gripe,” you admit, “We didn’t afford ourselves that time to grow, and I think that hindered our relationship. We weren’t husband and wife first, we were parents–and we were young, way too young.”
“You made it, though,” Shoko tries to brighten the mood, “you’re both amazing parents, and I know those beautiful girls that you created are lucky to have you.”
The intimacy of the conversation sends your emotions into overdrive. You quickly realize how much you missed her, how much you yearned to talk to her. To reconnect on this level.
A single tear cascades down your cheek, and you try not to sound like you’re crying when you say, “Ok, enough about that. You wanted to know about my shitty dating life, right?”
It happened last week, the grocery store incident. You were out picking up a few things for dinner when you spotted a cute guy standing outside of the aisle a few rows from you. He was fit beyond measure, in looks and strength, and was wandering around aimlessly in pursuit of red pepper flakes.
Coincidentally, you just happened to be in the seasoning aisle, and like the good samaritan you were, decided to personally hand-deliver it to him.
You wince as you vividly recall the embarrassing ordeal that ensued immediately after.
“Hey,” you peer from behind the aisle, with a bottle of red pepper flakes in tow. “I heard you mumbling about finding this, and you looked pretty lost, so I thought I’d pick ‘em out for you.”
The man’s brows furrow briefly before his lips up-turn into a grateful smile, “Oh, cool, thank you so much!” As quickly as the conversation started, it ends even quicker. He gives you a final nod of endearment before he’s turning around on his heels to resume his shopping.
“God, could he be any more dense? The men today really make you work for it, huh?” you mumble to yourself, pulling the bosom of your blouse down until a good amount of cleavage is on display. “Okay, alright. You got this, you got this. This always used to work, right? Yeah, men love boobs.”
Walking up to the man again, you try a different approach–a bolder approach. “Not to be a bother but I was wondering if I could-”
“Babe? Oh, there you are,” a new voice interjects. The owner of the voice emerges from around the corner and walks up to the man with a cart and a baby in tow. You’re stunned, to say the least. All you can do is stand there and blink in complete and utter dumbfoundment. As you remain in their presence, you take a moment to analyze the woman. She’s gorgeous, and toned. A real model-type broad, with feline-ish features that make so much sense paired with the man who appears to be her partner.
Oh, you think, and apparently say aloud, too. That’s when the woman turns to you, finally acknowledging your much smaller, and much quieter presence.
“Hi, can we help you?” she smiles, and it’s actually genuine. Toothy and perfect, and totally not jealous. You blink once, twice, before gathering your wits to answer her question.
“Yeah, uh, no. I actually, uhm, was helping your h-husband. He was looking for red pepper flakes,” you mutter embarrassedly, and point to the bottle in his hand. Upon further observation, you notice that she isn’t exactly wearing a ring. You find this odd, especially because his not wearing a ring is what encouraged you to pursue him. Carefully, you prod.
“If I may ask, how come neither of you are wearing rings?” The couple gives each other a look, one that makes you feel like the odd man out. A look that is universally known, and without a doubt, could easily be translated to: ‘did this chick really just ask that?’
Still, you smile as you wait for an answer. The woman takes the initiative. “Yeah, we don’t really believe in rings, isn’t that right, babe?” she says so matter-of-factly. You blink again for what seems like the thousandth time, because of all things, you did not expect that to come out of her mouth. Her husband is quick to validate her statement.
“Yeah, we think rings are unnecessary, you know? You don’t need a piece of metal to confirm your feelings,” he says walking to his partner’s side and wrapping an arm around her.
Disgustingly, the two give each other googly eyes before locking lips briefly. You can tell they’re the type to probably share this information with just about any soul who asks. Today, you just happened to be that unfortunate soul.
“Are you married?” she queries, tilting her head against her husband’s chest.
“I was, now we just…co-parent,” you purse your lips, ready for this entire interaction to be over. The woman frowns at your answer, and this time it’s not as genuine.
“Awe, well, I’m sorry to hear that.”
“It was actually a mutual decision,” you quip.
“Okay,” she smiles, widening her eyes at her husband to signal a departure, “well, it was nice meeting you, and thank you for the red pepper flakes.”
The family turns away and heads to the front where check-out is. You don’t even buy the items you intended to purchase, just leave your cart in the middle of whatever aisle you abandoned it and leave the store.
“Oh, baby, you didn’t?” Shoko asks in horror. You nod your head, still forgetting she can’t see you and the way you’re sliding down against the wall.
“I did, and I shan't ever again,” a laugh erupts from your throat.
“I mean, fuck, are we getting old? ‘Don’t believe in rings,’” she mumbles, “Don’t believe in rings, my ass! Is this what the youth are doing these days? Not proposing with rings?”
Now that you think about it, you wonder how that would even work. “Yeah, right? I mean, how does that even work? ‘Will you marry me? But, actually, you should know I don’t have a ring for you, so people will have to guess that we’re together purely based on vibes and energy,’” you mock, in a not-so-great man voice.
Shoko’s laughing so hard by the end of your bit that she breaks the sound barrier, and the sound that makes on the phone sends you into your own fit of laughter. You laugh so hard it seems like a stream of pee comes out. Curse your developed incontinence after motherhood.
“God, you’re so stupid, I can’t breathe,” she says exasperatedly, and you know that on the other side she’s probably keeling over in her bed.
“Oh, please. I bet you haven’t laughed this hard in a long time, bitch.”
“I haven’t,” she cackles. This back-and-forth continues until the two of you settle down enough to continue discussing your (pee-inducing) love life.
“You tried any dating apps?”
It’s a simple and valid question, but it only makes you laugh even harder. You only stop when the other side of the line goes quiet. “Wait, seriously?”
“Yeah, seriously. It’s what everyone’s doing these days! You’re not that old, you know.”
“Shut up,” you kid, “ it’s just that I never considered it. I mean, dating apps feel so impersonal. How serious do people even take it?”
“Sure, there’s people who use it for casual hook-ups and stuff, but a lot of people do come out of it with a relationship. Just don’t knock it ‘till you try it.”
“Oh?” you muse, curious. You wish Shoko could see your face, and the weird little dance your brows were doing. “Shoko, have you used a dating app before?”
The brunette kisses her teeth. “Can’t get anything past you.”
“Never.”
There’s a sense of hesitance but you encourage her to elaborate because ‘she became estranged from you for almost a decade and needed to pay her dues’. Sighing defeatedly, she eventually acquiesces.
“Fine, fine, maybe I’ve…been on a few dates,” she starts, “–and had a few one night stands, maybe more than a few, and maybe even dated a guy that turned into my stalker–”
“Ieiri Shoko! You naughty, naughty girl! Wait, stalker?”
“To make a long story short, I got a restraining order on that creep. Anyway,” she segues, attempting to change the subject, “We should make you a profile!”
For the rest of your phone call, Shoko guides you through all of the dating app basics. She offers her expert advice as you scroll through your camera roll for potential photos to use. You go through about a hundred before you finally settle on five that she really likes.
The one that she tells you to put first is a photo of you in a bikini. It’s a few years old but she says you look ‘radiant’ and that your ‘tits were practically spilling out of the cups’. Plus, for further consolation, she says most people on dating apps are liars.
“Everyone’s got at least one old photo on their profile, doesn’t make you a catfish,” she quips, “just means you’re a nostalgic person!”
“Right…”
The next one is a selfie. You’re smiling big in it, showing your gums, and it’s genuine. Shoko says guys like those types of photos because it shows them that you’re approachable. It also won her over because it’s fairly recent, too.
Out of all your photos, there’s only a select few that were taken within the year. You had to admit to her that you never really took photos of yourself anymore. Satoru took most of your candids. Still, she had a mission. And she wasn’t going to be satisfied until she stuck around to see your first match.
“After the selfie you should put the one of you with the girls.”
The picture she’s referring to is one Satoru also took. You remember that day fondly, and even now, the memories feel like a warm embrace.
about 8 years ago . . .
“Dad, mom, look! Hurry!” Hana, your oldest, shouts. Satoru and you are sitting on a blanket up on the sand dunes with Haruki, who’s trying her best to make a sand castle–to no avail.
“What is it, hon?” Satoru and you rush over to her, snatching toddler Haruki in the same breath. When you get to the scene, a flood of warmth washes over you upon discovering the ‘threat’.
“See, it’s baby turtles!” Hana’s squatting in the sand, watching with pure and unfettered fascination as the hatchlings crawl north to the ocean. When she looks up at you, with eyes so bright, and a smile so big that’s missing two of her front teeth, you want to cry.
“Oh, hon, that’s beautiful,” you gasp, lowering to your haunches so that you can join her. Satoru is about to follow suit before deciding at the last minute to go back to the blanket. When he returns, he snaps a picture unbeknownst to you. Eventually, though, you turn your gaze to him and he captures–what he used to think then–the ‘prettiest’ photo of you.
“You sneaking photos of me?” you squint, pointing at him. He trods closer until he’s standing above you. Then he snaps another. Your head’s tilted up, and you’ve got one eye open, and the other closed because of the sun. He always liked when you squinted like that because it made your nose do this cute little scrunch.
“Yup, ‘cause you’re my muse.”
You’re pulled out of your daydream when Shoko says your name on the other line.
“You still there?”
“Yeah, it’s just…”
“Just what?” she queries, waiting for a response.
“I wanna use it, but my ex-husband took it. It feels weird, you know? And do I want to use a photo of me with the girls?”
“Hon, who cares if Satoru took the photo? It’s still a good photo, and to answer your second question, why wouldn’t you include a picture with your girls?”
“I don’t know, I guess I’m just afraid no one will be interested. Nothing about a picture of a mom with her two daughters exactly screams ‘fuck me’.”
Shoko lets out a small chuckle but you’re being serious. “Oh, sweetie. You’re so cute. Milfs are in these days, I don’t think I’m the one getting old, I think it’s just you!”
“Ha-ha, laugh at the mom,” you feign annoyance, but give her a laugh in return.
“But seriously, please use that photo. Nobody’s going to skip you just because you’re a mom. A lot of men on there have kids of their own, just gotta tweak your settings,” Shoko reassures you.
By the end of your call, the profile is set. You thank your old friend for the previous heart-to-heart conversation, and the time she spent helping you set up your profile.
“Keep me updated, and don’t talk about mom stuff, okay? Now, I’m not saying you can’t talk about them,” she begins, “but show these guys your personality! I know she’s in the closet somewhere hiding next to our old slutty clubbing clothes.”
Then, the both of you say your goodbyes and she wishes you a good-luck on your newly established dating journey. As you lay in your bed, you give your profile a final onceover. Not too bad, you think to yourself.
You ended up using all of the photos she had originally picked out for you. Even the beach photo. To compensate for your old photos, though, Shoko made sure that your prompts were witty and full of personality.
“I’d match me, I think. No, yeah, these are funny. She did a good job.”
The following day, you open your phone to fifty notifications from the dating app. A tingle of excitement shoots through your body from the tip of your toes, to the top of your head. It takes all of your might not to squeal in the office.
“Holy fuck,” you whisper at your desk. The amount of notifications that you initially saw on your homescreen read ‘50’ but when you opened the app, it showed you an overwhelming ‘100’ with a fat plus sign next to it. “Wait, are these all the people who liked me? Shoko’s gonna flip.”
Getting up from your chair, you make a beeline to the nearest bathroom. Not that you have to use it, but so you can scroll through all the potential prospects without your boss seeing you on your phone.
Pulling open the door to the bathroom, you close it shut behind you and lock it. A few minutes pass in the time you’re able to get through about half of the people who liked you. You end up skipping a lot of them. They’re either too young, too self-absorbed, creepy, or just downright not your type.
Some stick out, though. Even trick you into thinking they’re potential matches, but then the other shoe drops–because there’s always another shoe. You’ll scroll through their profiles, and they’ll seemingly have all the perfect traits: intelligent, witty, handsome, tall–and then, boom. You see their ‘don’t want kids’ preference. Every failed match only discourages you more and more.
It’s weird, because your profile preferences are set to ‘have kids’ and you even have a photo pictured with your girls. So why are men liking your profile despite that? After a few more scrolls, you’re just about ready to head back to your desk but then–you have a hit.
Your finger hovers over the ‘x’ at the bottom of the screen, then retracts. The guy’s profile at first impression is miles better than the rest, it’s almost too good to be true. His first photo is what piqued your interest. It’s of him posing for a silly photo with his sons, and he’s got his arms draped around their shoulders.
As you scroll down his profile, you see that there’s even more of him with his children. You take this as a green flag. He wants people to know he has kids, and that he isn’t embarrassed to show them off. You admire him for it.
The last few remaining photos are an amalgamation of selfies and full-body photos. To the average, well-adjusted adult, looks wouldn’t be a deal breaker. But he definitely wasn’t too bad on the eyes, and you were not complaining about that–especially, after the odd men you had to scroll through to get here. In other words, he was gorgeous and still fit despite being older than you (him, respectively being in his early forties).
Checking the time on your phone, you realize that you’re pushing your little ‘bathroom break’. Before heading back to your desk, you decide to respond to his first photo.
You: Cute! Could never get my girls to stand so still for a photo like this now haha :)
Work goes by slower than you’d like, but finishes up just in time when you get a notification from the dating app. You’re a little more excited than you’d care to admit. Tidying up your workspace, you say your goodbyes to your colleagues and head to the elevator. Absent-mindedly, you rush to answer his message but realize it won’t go through because of the elevator’s poor service.
Kazuki: Oh, they’re moody and grown now, don’t be fooled. I can't remember the last time I saw my youngest smile.
You don’t answer his reply until you get home. Actually, you do just about everything but answer his reply: check on the girls, shower, prepare dinner, pour a glass of wine–you’re nervous, and you don’t know why. But you know you should probably answer soon before he becomes disinterested. So you get comfortable in bed with your glass of wine and pull open his chat.
You: Lol, know that all too well. Kids are little assholes, aren’t they?
The speed in which he reads your text is startling, you don’t even have enough time to close out of the chat. Then, he responds.
Kazuki: Hell yeah they are!
Kazuki: Sometimes I want to strangle my youngest. He’s at that age where he’s starting to rebel and question everything. I told him he was supposed to be the ‘easy’ one, but his knucklehead brothers are bad influences on him…Tell me, does it ever get easier?
You: Sounds a lot like my oldest. She used to cling to me like a koala but now she’s the ring leader, and I’m the enemy. My youngest still loves her mama, though (for now lol).
You: And to answer your question, I’d like to think so?
You take a second before continuing your response. Shoko told you to keep the mom talk limited, but this seems to be working for you so far, and he’s genuinely interested in what you have to say. So for once, you’re going to ignore her advice.
You: Kids go through phases. It's our job to reassure them that we’re not going anywhere. No matter how much they push us away or try to, that is :)
Kazuki’s chat bubbles pop up, then disappear. You think he’s deciding on what to say.
Kazuki: I can tell we’re gonna get along great. It’s nice opening up like this, you know? Talking to another parent. If I'm being honest, dating apps have always intimidated me…
Kazuki: People see kids as ‘baggage’, and it really bothers me. My kids aren’t baggage. They’re the best parts of me. And if someone doesn’t see that, then we have no business getting to know each other.
Kazuki: Sorry for getting all sappy. Just felt like I needed to say it.
His apology makes you frown. It feels like a breath of fresh air to hear someone talk about their kids so lovingly, because you feel the exact same way. You’re glad you downloaded the app, and you make a mental note to thank Shoko again later (after you debrief her about this).
You: Never apologize for speaking about your kids! And if we’re being absolutely transparent, that was my biggest gripe with downloading this app, too.
You: I’m so glad we matched each other. I’d like to get to know you more. And I’m hoping the feeling’s mutual?
Kazuki: It’s more than mutual.
Kazuki: Don’t want to get ahead of myself but how do you feel about dinner? There’s a cool high-scale restaurant in the city that I haven’t been to yet. Heard it’s got two Michelin stars despite opening up not too long ago.
The prospect of going on a sit-down dinner date has your stomach in knots. It’s been a hot minute since the last time you’ve done so, but you’re eager to know the man behind the screen on a more personal level. Plus, being treated to a high-scale restaurant with two Michelin stars doesn’t seem too bad either. You’re never one to turn down free dinner.
You: I’d love to, but how soon we talkin’? Gotta see if it’ll align with my schedule.
Kazuki: How’s this Friday at 8 sound? :)
The days leading up to Friday breeze by in a blur. For the majority of the week, it feels like you’re walking on cloud nine. Eventually, the conversation transitions from the dating app to exchanging phone numbers, and since then, the two of you have been texting back-and-forth everyday.
You talk about mundane things. Work, shows, movies, books you’ve recently read, what your kids are up to–but the other things? The other messages are flirty, and sexy, and filled with so much tension that it could cut a rope in half.
In between messages, the two of you have also exchanged a few photos. Nothing risqué or anything of that nature, just random photos of you throughout the day. The last one he sent was a few hours ago of him at work, captioned with: ‘Could this meeting be any longer?’.
You reply to the message with the ‘ha ha’ reaction, in consideration of not wanting to get him in trouble at work (even if he was the one who initiated the conversation). As the days go by, though, you make it a habit to update Shoko every step of the way.
Her first reaction to hearing about him was enthusiastic. That is, until you showed her screenshots from his profile. You vaguely remember her saying something that was meant as a compliment, but came out more like an insult.
“‘Oh, he’s a dad!” was her initial response, “oh, he’s a dad…and he really loves his kids. You’re meant for each other.’”
When you tried to ask her what she meant by that, she changed the subject. Every update since then has earned slightly more positive reactions, though.
Today, you ask her for more advice. Only this time, you’re on video call.
“Shokoooo,” you drawl, “our date is tomorrow! You have to help me find something to wear.” The panic in your voice is so palpable, she can almost feel your shaky hands through the screen. Flipping the camera, you hurriedly pan your phone around the closet.
“Breathe, girl, breathe,” she demonstrates first, before telling you to repeat the same motions. “Take me to that section over there–no, not that one–wait, yep, there.” You amble over to the area she’s directing you to through the phone.
“What’s that black little number right there?” She points. You prop the phone up on a shelf and scour through the section, tugging out a dress you haven’t seen in ages (which has you questioning how she even spotted it because it was pretty far back into the closet). Walking back into frame, you hold the fabric up to your body.
Shoko nods in approval, “That’s the one, babe. Try it on!”
It’d been about a decade since the last time you wore this dress. It’d also been about a decade since you were ever this small. Looking in the mirror, you run your hands over every surface inch, every crevice of the dress, in a newfound sense of appreciation for the adult weight you’ve gained since becoming a mother.
The dress was always stunning but it hugged everything perfectly even more so now. When you walk back into frame, your friend gives you a look of pure adoration. She’s so enthralled that she snaps a few screenshots for keepsaking.
“Thank god it’s Satoru’s turn to get the kids tonight,” she says, “‘cause you’re definitely getting some tonight.”
You roll your eyes, reminding her she’s on speaker phone. “Oh, please. It’s just dinner!”
“Not in that dress,” she retorts, wagging her finger in the camera. While the two of you continue to chat about the details of tonight, a knock on your bedroom door draws your attention.
“Mom, can I come in?” the voice sounds. It’s Haruki.
“Come in, hon!”
After you give the ok, you turn to Shoko and mouth to her to behave. Haruki turns the knob and enters, closing the door behind her. She sees you standing in front of the mirror before you see her, and silently utters a ‘wow’. You’re just about done putting your earrings in when you join her in the other room.
“What do you think, bun? Does your mom look hot?” you spin around, smoothing your hands down the length of the dress. You wait in anticipation for her approval, because if anyone could tell it like it is, it was always going to be a kid. Your Haruki was no exception.
“You look really pretty, Mom. I’m glad you’re going out tonight, I mean, you don’t really have friends so I think this will be good for you,” she elaborates, though you wish she would’ve stopped at the compliment.
Still, it puts a smile on your face to hear her verbalize that she’s okay with you doing something for yourself. You never quite discussed the prospect of getting back out there with your kids–and not even intentionally. It just never felt like the right time.
“You could’ve stopped at the compliment, punk!” you grab her, then wrap her in your arms, “but thank you. Love you, bun.”
“Love you more, mama.” Neither of you make the effort to pull away. Instead, you both stand there. Hugging, breathing, embracing each other’s warmth. You don’t always get hugs this good, so when you do, you savor it. Drag it out until your arms and legs get all tingly.
Or until someone interrupts. Another knock on the door. This time it’s Hana.
“Ew, what’s going on?” Hana feigns a look of disgust. You know she’s just jealous; she’ll never admit it, though. Which is why sometimes you have to force her to participate.
“Get over here,” you scrunch your nose, forcefully pulling her into your tight embrace. She tries to protest but eventually accepts defeat. You squeeze them both until they whine that they can’t breathe anymore. Then you squeeze them some more because this one’s for you.
“My special girls,” you breathe in, taking in all of their love. Soaking it all up so that tonight you have the courage to try again. To allow yourself a love of your own. When you let go, there’s a sniffle from the closet. It totally dawned on you that Shoko was still on the phone.
“They’re so big now, they don’t even know their auntie,” she fakes a sob, blowing her nose into a tissue.
“Mom, who’s on the phone?” Haruki queries with a confused expression etched onto her face. It suddenly dawns on you again that although you’ve been communicating with Shoko again, you haven’t exactly told them.
“Hey, you came in here to tell me something right, Han?” Your attempt to change the subject is poorly done, which doesn’t come as a surprise to you considering deflection has never quite been an ability you excelled at. Nonetheless, the look of suspicion they give you after is fleeting before they explain to you in unison that their father is here.
“Your father’s been waiting down there this whole time and nobody cared to tell me?” you whisper-yell, left eye twitching to emphasize your ill-preparedness. The girls only shrug their shoulders in response, like this was something you were just supposed to know.
“Well, you did force us into a hug and make us do all that Kumbaya stuff,” Hana mumbles under her breath.
“Okay, enough about all that. Are you guys all packed? Where are your bags? I don’t want your dad seeing–”
“You don’t want dad to see your date, right?” Hana raises a brow, all knowing. Sometimes she was a little too smart for her own good. You want to blame that on the private schools Satoru had them enrolled in, but really you just know she’s just a menace in her own right. She learned that from him.
“I agree with the kid,” a voice chimes in. You rush to the closet and grab your phone from the shelf. There’s a huge, shit-eating grin on Shoko’s face. Somehow she’s responsible for this. You don’t know how yet, nor do you have proof, but you know it.
“Okay, thank you, love you, bye!” Before you can hang up, Shoko blurts something.
“Tell him I said hi,” she begins, “–andnottogetahardonwhenheseesyou!”
You hang up the call and roll your eyes, chuckling to yourself because of her idiocy. When you enter the corridor, you hear a faint sound of hushed voices from downstairs. It’s only when you round the bannister at the top, when those voices become discernible and louder.
You stop at the top, and when your eyes meet his, it feels like all the air in your lungs have expelled. Suddenly, you’re hyper-aware of what you’re wearing, and the fabric, and the way it clings to your body. Neither he, nor you, look away–you should, you want to, but you don’t.
And in the time the two of you gaze upon the other, time stops for a modicum of a second. In this second, you and him are the last two souls in the world. At least, that’s how it feels anyway before he breaks eye contact.
You shift your gaze shortly after, and put on a trained smile. Those eyes of his were always so intense. You guess you forgot over the years how easy it was to lose yourself in the crystalline pools of them. Gathering your wits, you resume your movements and saunter down the imperial staircase.
“Hey, didn’t mean to keep you waiting. Sort of lost track of time, but I think the girls are all packed,” you say, your voice coming to a decrescendo upon noticing the way his eyes trail over your frame. They’re unreadable, though. Indifferent, and honestly, you’re not sure how to feel. So, you begin fidgeting uncomfortably with the rings around your finger.
Then, he smiles. It’s eerie and fake. “Not a problem, I haven’t been here too long. But, uh,” he begins ambling around the place, touching random objects around the living room, “Didn’t know you had plans. What’s the occasion? Going out for drinks with your colleagues?”
You furrow your brows, confused with his sudden interests in your plans. It wasn’t really like him to prod. “No, actually,” you rock back-and-forth on the balls of your heels, “i’m…i’m going on a date,” you finish with a pursed smile. He only nods his head in response, still walking around the place touching stuff, messing with the picture frames on the mantle. They’re all crooked now.
“How come this is the only picture you have up of me,” he asks suddenly. You know, that he knows, the answer to that. And he knows, that you know, you’ll indulge in his games anyway.
“The girls wanted them in their rooms. Why do you ask? You want me to go grab them and put ‘em all up around the house?” Again, he doesn’t say anything. Just gives you a final once over before heading back to the foyer to ask if the girls are all set to go.
“Yeah, but I can’t find my tablet, dad. Can I go look for it?” Haruki speaks up. “I thought I packed it.”
Satoru looks at the time on his watch, pinches the crease in between his brows. “Sure, kiddo. Can we make it quick, please?” He throws his hand in the air for emphasis, then points to his watch. Haruki nods, then runs up the stairs.
“Actually, you go on up too and help your sister. You guys are holding up dad,” you turn to Hana and gesture for her to head up with your head. She rolls her eyes, yelling up the stairs for her younger sister to ‘freaking hurry up’.
You and Satoru both turn to each other with wide eyes, laughing at the nerve of those children.
“They get that attitude from you, you know,” you point to him, driving your index finger into his bicep.
“You sure? Their mom’s got a pretty bad mouth on her, too. Or, have you forgotten?” He teases, bending his knees slightly to level his eyes with yours, intruding into your space. The smirk he dons is cheeky, too friendly–too inviting. You want to smack it off of him.
“Oh, shut u–” the sound of your phone chiming interrupts your banter. It’s a message from Kazuki, and you open it while Satoru stands over you. Probably close enough to read the message on his own if he wanted.
Kazuki: Hey, I hate to do this but I don’t think I can go through with tonight.
When you read the message, your heart drops into your stomach. There goes the other shoe, you think, fully embracing your pessimism. Who were you kidding, really? To think that tonight you’d go out and have a good time. Do something for yourself. It was stupidity.
Chat bubbles pop up on the screen. He has more to say.
He has more to say, and you’re fighting the urge to cry–to not shake out of sheer frustration while you’re still standing in front of Satoru. Because nothing would be worse than him seeing you can’t even land a date.
Kazuki: I recently just went through a divorce, and I know that I should have informed you about this before continuing our conversations…Especially since you’ve been so transparent with me about your own divorce and strife.
Kazuki: But if I’m being completely honest, I was scared. I genuinely wanted to see this through, at first. I wanted to forget about my ex-wife for just one night. But I realized I’ve been asking the impossible of myself…I’m still in love with her, and it’s because I’m in love with her that I won’t allow myself to lead you on any further.
Kazuki: I think we would’ve had a good time tonight. It's unfortunate we had to meet under such circumstances because you’re a really lovely woman, and I’m sorry an asshole is standing you up right now.
Kazuki: Take care. I know there’s a guy out there just waiting for his shot.
Satoru takes notice of the way your face drops as you read over the messages. Part of him wants to overstep his boundaries and take a peek at the screen. But he doesn’t. He gives you your space and takes a seat on the couch, waits for you to say something first.
In the meantime, he studies your face. Watches intently as your eyes become glossy the more you scan the messages, watches as your bottom lip catches between your teeth to hold back from crying. He thinks he knows what just happened.
Taking a deep breath, you lock your phone and put on another trained smile, “Well, looks like I’m staying in tonight.” Satoru dislikes when you do that. When you put on a fake smile and overcompensate to make others around you feel better, even when it’s so very obvious you aren’t. He wishes that sometimes you would just be selfish–act out.
And then you continue the façade. It makes his skin itch.
“I was too tired anyway, guess I can just catch up o–”
“Will you stop,” he spits, rising from his seat on the couch to stand. It comes out harsher than he intended, but he doesn’t regret it. You look at him like he’s got two heads as he walks over to the mantle and leans against it. His back is turned towards you, and the palms of his hands hold the crest of it. He uses it as leverage to rock on the heels of his feet. You can tell there’s something he wants to say because of the way his jaw ticks.
Satoru is never one to bite his tongue, so you’re not exactly sure why he’s choosing to be so restrained. If he wasn’t going to spit it out, you were going to poke. “What’s your problem?”
He chuckles at this, rubs his chin then pushes off the mantle to stand in front of you, gets all in your space again. The movement almost sends you back but you hold your ground, tilt your chin up at him and repeat the question. Slowly, this time with more venom.
“My problem? What’s your problem?” He breathes through his nose, his eyes flickering back-and-forth between your own. “Why do you always pretend like you’re not lonely? It’s okay if you were looking forward to having fun tonight. It’s okay to be upset and be mad at the asshole who stood you up!”
With every verbal prod at you, the gap between you decreases. His feet inch closer and closer to your own and force you to retreat farther until your back hits the wall. The coldness of it causes your breath to hitch, and you try to stay calm as Satoru encroaches more into your personal space. Being on the receiving end of his passion was always suffocating, you feel exposed under the intensity of his gaze–even more so as he continues to tear into you.
“Why do you even care?!” you cut him off, eyes wide and veins pumping full of adrenaline. “It’s not your place to be so invested in my life anymore! We’re not together, you don’t have to get so hot and bothered about things going shitty for me. I’m a big girl, and I’m perfectly capable of fighting my own battles.”
By the time you finish, you’re a heaving, shaking mess. He takes this as a sign to withdraw from your space, and goes to sit back down on the couch. When you finally settle your nerves, you join him, leaving a foot of space in between you. There’s an awkward silence, one that wouldn’t have even happened if he just respected your boundaries in the first place. Now he feels like the asshole instead of the actual asshole who dumped you. Taking a hesitant breath, he decides to speak up.
“Look, I’m sorry. I didn’t…It wasn’t my intention to come off so strong like that,” he begins, “I just wanted to let you know that you don’t always have to pretend to be fine. It’s not fair, you shouldn’t do that to yourself.” His eyes wander over to you reluctantly, like he’s scared that if he looks too long you’ll disengage from the conversation.
“It’s okay,” your voice is small, just above a whisper. You want to face him, but you know that if you do, you'll break into a million pieces. So you keep your gaze downward, busy yourself with the stray pieces of thread on the bottom of your dress. “You’re right, you know. I think I just…I think I just tell myself to expect disappointment so that when something bad happens, I’ll know it’s not because I got my hopes up.”
Satoru turns to you, and you can see him frown through your peripheral. Still, you don’t face him because you’re not done talking. But you thank him silently for listening without interrupting.
“Even though you’re right, I don’t appreciate the way you came on so strongly. We’re not married anymore, we’re not a couple–we’re co-parents. So if there’s something I want you to know about that’s outside of the scope of our kids, I’ll let you know. Otherwise, leave it alone.”
Satoru’s face softens. For once you’re being selfish, putting your foot down. This is the side of you he likes. “Okay. I respect that,” he says, “But can I ask you something?” The smile on his face is mirthful, like he’s got something else up his sleeves this evening. Skeptical, you finally face him with a raised brow.
“What?”
“Let me take you to dinner.”
You laugh in his face, even go as far as smacking his arm because you want him to know you found the joke really funny. He doesn’t budge, and that’s when you realize he’s being serious.
“Wait, what?”
“Let’s go to dinner,” he stands up, crossing his arms across his chest. You tilt your head in disbelief. You’re just waiting for someone to tell you you’re on that old reality show punk’d.
“Funny, I just poured my heart out to you and now you’re making fun of me,” you roll your eyes, feigning annoyance.
“I’m being serious,” he reassures, “you’re already dressed up. It’d be a shame for it to go to waste.” His eyes are twinkling with hope, and once again, you find yourself falling victim to their persuasiveness.
Being under Gojo Satoru’s gaze was suffocating.
Giving in, you ask, “So what are you gonna do? Drive all the way home to get dressed?”
The question is genuine, but the bastard just grins. “I’m a little hurt,” he throws a hand over his heart, “don’t you know me by now? I’m a businessman. I keep pressed blazers and slacks on me at all times.”
He swings his keys around his index finger, hoping that the promise of a spare change of clothes being in his car is enough to convince you to say yes.
“I don’t know…” you trail.
“C’mon, let me take you out. I promise you won’t regret it.”
Somehow he was able to persuade you into going out. After he changed into his spare clothes, you ended up telling your girls that there was gonna be a change of plans, and that they’d go home with their dad tomorrow.
Of course, before leaving, you made sure to leave some money on the table for pizza, and you also made sure to drill into their heads not to open the door for anyone except the delivery guy. You knew they knew the drill already, but it didn’t feel right to leave without saying it anyway.
“Be good, listen to your sister, she’s in charge,” you pinch Haruki’s cheek. Hana smirks, nodding her head in agreement with you.
“I will mom, I know,” she huffs, crossing her arms.
“And you,” your finger wags at Hana, her smirk drops. “Don’t provoke your sister, be nice. Act like you love each other, please.”
“Fine, whatever. I guess,” she grabs the knob to the door, ready to kick the both of you out already. “So does this mean the two of you are back together, or?”
Satoru and you turn to each other before answering in unison, “No.”
“Okay, cool. Well, have fun,” she practically closes the door on the two of you, locking it after. Satoru is just as dumbfounded as you are, but then you break into a fit of laughter.
“Those kids, man.”
“Your kids!” you correct, pushing him playfully as the both of you walk down the pebbled pathway. He finds his equilibrium in time to unlock the car and open your side of the door. You pause before ducking inside.
“Oh, how gentlemanly of you,” you jest, “And they say chivalry is dead.”
“How could it be when I’m alive?” He says matter-of-factly, closing your side of the door. He taps the top of the car before sliding across the hood to the other side. Nice to see some things never changed.
When he gets inside and turns on the car, he puts his hand on the back of your seat to back out. The proximity sends a shiver down your spine, and you have to physically refrain from letting your eyes linger on his jaw, and his arms, and the face he makes when he’s trying to concentrate.
You try to dispel these less-than-friendly thoughts by looking somewhere, anywhere else but him. But you can’t, and it’s irritating.
This is the second time tonight you’ve been this close, and it’s only this time that you realize something about him is…different. Earlier, he didn’t really smell like anything, but you quickly notice his smell has changed.
There’s a sort of piney scent coming from him. It’s not strong or obnoxious enough to blind your nostrils, but it’s enough for you to just barely pick up on it. You almost think it was premeditated, that he took the liberty of spritzing some on before walking you to the car. Before you separated, he’d made it a habit to wear variations of woody scents for you. If you can recall correctly, a passing comment you made about the cologne he was wearing that day is what sparked the habit.
Surely, this couldn’t be coincidental?
“You smell nice,” you blurt, filling in the silence.
Satoru glances at you, “Thank you.” You hate that from the corner of your eye, you can see his stupid little smirk growing bigger by the minute. He already had a big ego, it didn’t need to be stroked any more.
“Don’t let it go to your head, though. You usually smell pretty rank.”
“Ohhh, is that so? Guess I gotta start wearing this more often then, huh?”
“Sure, do what you want,” you say, trying to remain indifferent even though you’re failing terribly to hide your smile. When the car approaches a red light, you finally decide to ask the big question. “So where are you taking me?”
“You’ll see,” he glances over, “Just know I’m good friends with the owner, so last minute reservations weren't a problem.”
The rest of the car ride is silent, save for the low hum of the music playing on the radio. When you arrive at the location, Satoru makes sure to walk all the way around to your side of the door again and open it. Immediately after, the two of you are greeted by a young male. He’s wearing a white button down, black slacks, and a black vest with a red tie. Judging by his appearance, you assume he’s a valet driver.
Satoru drops his keys in the driver’s hands, and escorts you towards the entrance. The boy bows and goes to park the car. Looking around, you start to wonder where exactly this place is supposed to be. The area is dark and secluded, and from where you stand outside, it doesn’t sound like there’s supposed to be a restaurant here. You don’t hear any voices, you don’t even see any security or other passerbyers.
Still, you follow behind him like a duckling, only coming to a halt when he leads you to a door taller than the both of you. He gestures for you to back up, then raises his knuckles to blow a strong, single knock. You’re taken by surprise when a set of angry eyes appear behind a slot in the door.
The pair of eyes first scan over you, then Satoru. A gruff voice is second to accompany them, “Where can I get a good drink?”
“I heard the bar down the street is nice,” Satoru answers. The hatch to the door closes, then swings open the door, and the man behind it moves aside to welcome you in.
“Follow me, please.” Once he closes the door, he begins guiding you down the dimly lit hallway. After making what seems like your hundredth turn, you eventually reach a staircase. The man gestures for you to go on ahead, and you think this is him implying where the three of you will depart.
“Thank you,” you say softly, disappearing down the stairs. Satoru isn’t too far behind, keeping a pace between you. As you near the end of the long, narrow hallway, a stream of white light brightens up your whole path. It leads you down to another door like a beacon of light, and when you reach it, you can hear voices, live music, and dishes clanking on the other side. It’s bustling with life. A huge, joyous smile plasters across your face. It’s almost child-like in appearance, like you haven’t seen something this cool in a long time.
Satoru stands beside you and winks. “What d’ya think? Any idea yet where we are?”
“I think this is fucking cool, and hm,” you take a second to mull it over, “are we at a speakeasy?”
“Smart girl. Now come on.” Stepping back, you allow him to pull open the door, and when he does, there isn’t a word to describe the atmosphere of the place you step into. All you can do is stand there in astonishment. Before long, a man walks up to you.
“Welcome, what is the name you reserved under?”
“Gojo.”
Nodding, the host instructs you to follow after him. He leads you to a private seating area, somewhere far in the back that’s secluded from the other patrons. The space is much bigger, and much more extravagant. You know you’re only sitting way back here because Satoru is who he is. And in all the years you’ve known him, his connections were just another party trick in his arsenal.
The hostess seats you, then Satoru, and tells you that a waiter will be with you shortly.
“This is nice, really nice, but is it–”
“Legal?” he finishes your sentence, “don’t worry. It’s a modern speakeasy-style restaurant. There’s nothing illegal going on here, promise.”
While you wait for your designated waiter, your focus shifts from the man in front of you to the man singing on the stage. Up until now, his voice was white noise in the background, but then he started singing a tune scarily reminiscent of your past–and your breath catches in your throat.
If I ever leave you, baby
You can say I told you so
And if I ever hurt you
You know, I hurt myself…
Turning your gaze back to Satoru, you squint your eyes mirthfully in disbelief. You wonder if this is just a funny coincidence, if this is the universe playing her tricks, but you know deep down, that coincidences and Gojo Satoru don’t belong in the same sentence.
You open your mouth to speak, but quickly close it when you see the waiter approaching from the corner of your eye. He greets the both of you with a polite smile, then sets down two glasses of water.
“Good evening, I’ll be your waiter for the night,” he says, placing a menu in front of you, “Can I get you fine folks started off with a bottle of wine?”
Satoru nods, tells him to bring the best bottle of red they have and then gestures for him to come closer so that he can whisper something in his ear. All the while, you sit back in your seat observing, clicking your nails on the table until the server pulls back and bows.
When he departs, you immediately lean in over the table, and ask, “Just how much time did you have to plan all of this?”
Satoru feigns aloofness, taking a sip of his water, “What do you mean?”
You roll your eyes, gesturing at the stage with your eyes. Then, as if suddenly coming to a realization, he goes, “Oh, that? Yeah, I had nothing to do with that. But isn’t it funny they’re playing our old song?”
Now he’s smirking, with his elbow leaning back on the chair, and a gaze so piercing, you’re certain you’ll crumble into nothing unless you look away. So you do, avert your gaze back to the stage and sway calmly.
Is that any way for a man to carry on
Do you think I want my loved one gone
Said I love you
More than you’ll ever know
More than you’ll ever know
“So funny,” you counter.
Eventually, the server comes back with a bottle. “1982 Chateau Latife Rothschild,” he holds it out to present, “Is this alright?”
Despite the years spent with Satoru, and the many elitist events you often attended with him, your knowledge on wine had never surpassed anything but surface level. You knew the difference between good wine and cheap wine was the taste, but your taste buds had grown accustomed to store-bought, so if anything, store-bought tasted like heaven to you. Anyway, though, you nod your head and urge him to pour a glass.
“Thank you,” you smile, before gently swirling the glass and bringing it up to your nose to smell (something you only know to do after being the odd man out at so many company banquets). Satoru waits for you to sip your glass before he sips his. The way you melt into your seat is a silent assurance that you’re pleased.
“This is great, you’re amazing,” you tell the server, who seems pleased by your compliment.
“Glad to be of service, miss. Are you ready to order?”
Dinner goes by smoothly. In fact, it goes by so smoothly, you and Satoru finish the entire bottle of wine. Now you sit at the table, bellies full, faces flushed and sore from laughing, and now you find yourself telling him about the grocery store incident. If you had half a mind (a sober one), you’d shut up right this second to save yourself from the embarrassment. But you don’t. And Satoru’s very persuasive when you’re tipsy.
“Keep going,” he leans in, hand nestled under his chin. He’s completely invested in the story. Actually, as soon as he heard the words ‘store’ and ‘cute guy’, he just had to know more. And you begging him to change the subject didn’t help, not when the sadist in him loved to see you so embarrassed.
“Fine,” you hiccup, “It was so - so bad, Toru.” He doesn’t miss the way you slip and call him by the nickname you’d always reserved for him. It makes his heart race, and god, does he miss the way it sounds spilling from your lips. But he ignores the feeling, and refocuses on your story instead. Which, by the way, was proving to be a task in itself because his eyes couldn’t stop drifting back down to your lips. So soft, so–
“And then she said ‘we don’t believe in rings,’” you whisper, fist coming down on the table. The sound it makes nearly sobers you up, and you realize just how loud you’re being despite your table being secluded from others. Giggling like a kid, you continue, “I mean, how fucking insane is that?!”
“Something as bizarre as that could only ever happen to you,” he replies, laughing along with you, “those people were crazy.”
“The craziest,” you agree, throwing your head back in another fit of laughter. Gradually, the two of you begin to settle down, and once again, you find your attention being drawn back to the man on the stage. Only this time, he’s making an announcement.
“Good evening ladies and gentleman. Tonight I’ve got a special request,” he says, looking out into the audience. Looking at you. “This one’s for a very special lady who, from what I’ve been told, is a great mother that needs to start doing things for herself.”
The singer steps out of the spotlight and hands the note to a server. Your server. Then he begins to sing, and your heart drops into the pit of your stomach. It was your wedding song.
[...] I don’t even know how to love you
Just the way you want me to
But I’m ready (ready) to learn (to learn)
Yes, I’m ready (ready) to learn (to learn)
“Now this one? This one was me,” Satoru leans forward, and you swiftly turn your head to face him. He smiles as he watches your face go through ten different emotions before ultimately softening. It warms your heart to see how incredibly planned this evening was, despite the amount of time he was given to work with. Even so, it kind of scares you–because then that meant this was a grand gesture–that this was his way of saying something. And you weren’t too sure if you wanted to hear it. Your gaze drops to your lap, and Satoru frowns.
To fall in love
To fall in love
To fall in love with you…
“Look at me,” he says softly, but you don’t. “Hey, look at me.” He reaches over the table to take your chin in between his fingers. The touch alone feels electric. Sends liquid hot lightning down the column of your spine. Reluctantly, you meet his gaze, and like always, it’s suffocating. They’re so wide with hope, and so, so gentle in the way they hold you. The longer you gaze upon them, the more you convince yourself it’ll be okay if you surrender to them.
“It’s been years since we’ve divorced,” his voice is shaky, almost strained, like he’s actively thinking how to choose his words carefully, “and when we sat down that night, I thought it was what I wanted, too, you know? And for a while, it was,” he reaches a hand across the table to rest atop your own, “but you gotta know…you gotta know–you’re it for me. There’s no one else on this Earth that I want to start over with. You’ve always been the beginning and end of my story, and I’ll be damned if I let another man start one with you.”
Your heart is beating faster than you can even process what he’s saying. The only thing you’re focused on is not passing out in the middle of this damn restaurant. But then he’s squeezing your hand, and your focus is drawn back to those piercing, pale blues that even put crystals to shame.
“So what do you say?” he says, so softly, so tender. “Can we try again?”
Waiting for your reply, he squeezes your hand again. It’s like your soul is wandering the line between death and the living, and his touch is the tether that brings you back. In the background, the tune of the song sung at your wedding gives you a push of courage.
I don’t even know how to kiss your lips (kiss your lips)
At a moment like this
But I’m going to learn how to do
All the things you want me to
Yes, I’m ready
(Are you ready?) Yes, I’m ready
To fall in love
To fall in love
To fall in love right now
“Yes.”
The walk back to the car is hurried. Aided by both, years and years of built up tension, and the liquid courage currently bubbling in your systems.
The race back to his apartment is even faster. You thank the gods silently that it’s within close proximity to where you just were.
Once you get there, make your way past the doorman and concierge (who both give the two of you a knowing look), go up the elevator, and finally get into his loft–it’s over. Years of restraint, years of pretending, wanting–yearning, come crashing down.
There’s barely any time to close the door before he’s pushing you against it. His lips trail down the column of your neck, then come up to kiss your jaw, until eventually, they find your lips. And when they do, it’s instantaneous–that familiar feeling, the feeling that feels almost like falling.
Once again, for what felt like centuries, you feel again the rush of helplessness. The push and pull of the tide. It brings you down, down, down to the bottom of the ocean floor, and it’s unmerciful.
Kissing Satoru is like being shocked with ten thousand volts of energy. Like all this time you’ve spent not kissing him, has been costing you your life, and he’s the only one who can deliver you salvation. It’s all teeth and tongue for a minute. Messy, and sticky, and nasty. A true testament to the desperation brewing in the pits of both your stomachs.
The sensation of it all has your knees going slack, and that’s when he says–
“Jump.”
Obeying, you do just that. Jump right into his arms, and wrap your legs around his torso like you’ve done so many times before. The way you feel now is the way you used to feel before then, too. Like you were made to fit like this. To be held in his arms like you were molded from the same clay.
Carefully, he adjusts his grip on your body. Keeps his palms planted on the bottoms of your ass, and begins the trek to his room. He struggles a bit getting there because you haven’t stopped kissing since entering the apartment, but he figures it out after a stumble or two (which resulted in a bitten lip and you apologizing profusely through giggles).
“The turbulence up here is crazy, don’t blame me, blame the pilot,” you jest, kissing down his neck to make up for it.
“I’ll make sure to let him know,” he jokes back. As soon as he gets to the bed, he sets you down at the edge of the bed. You try to bring him down to your height but he stops you, wags his finger in your face playfully before using it to push you back into the bed. His fingers start to play with the fabric of your dress, and then his face takes on an indifferent expression. The same one from earlier that night when he first saw you walking down the stairs.
“Can’t believe you were gonna wear this for him…” he trails, lifting the fabric up slowly, eyeing you while doing so, “as if this dress doesn’t mean something.”
Of course, when Shoko chose it, its significance did make you falter–but in your defense, not once did you ever anticipate for him to see you in it. And you especially didn’t expect for him to remember it, the last time you wore it was almost a decade ago.
“I didn’t…” you start, a smile creeping on your lips, “think you remembered?”
“‘Course I did, how could I not?” He says more sharply than intended, taking offense. He takes offense because he spent the better half of the night showing you he remembered. The little things and everything else in between. Couldn’t you see that?
“It was our 4th anniversary. Bought you this dress and fucked you in it that same night. Funny how the second time I’m seeing you in this dress, the circumstances are the same except only this time we’re divorced,” he says, crawling over your body. “Guess I gotta show you just how much I remember.”
With that, he slips a hand under your dress, pulls your panties to the side and runs a finger down your slit. Oh-so-willingly, do you spread your legs for him. It’s almost subconscious, the way your body responds to him. And he revels in it. Lets his fingers work you, feel you, bring you to ecstasy. Then he heightens your pleasure tenfold when he kisses his way down your body, and takes a seat before you on his knees.
Unceremoniously, he pulls your body to the edge of the bed. Takes his time slipping your panties down the length of your legs, then kisses the insides of your thighs, before finally stopping at your mound.
Slowly, he lowers himself to your cunt, kisses your clit softly. Once, twice, three times. The pace in which he’s moving is killing you, to say the least. But you know he’s savoring the moment, making up for all the years he spent not kneeling like this between your legs. So you let him; let him caress you all over before he comes seeking the honey-sweet salvation dripping from your core.
The second his tongue makes contact with your heat, you find yourself clamping a heavy hand over your mouth. “Fuck, Toruuuu,” you drawl, back arching off the bed. Pleased with his abilities, he smiles smugly, using this as an opportunity to push himself even deeper. Up and down, he licks at your slit, uses his fingers in tandem with his tongue to prod at that spongy spot he knows you love.
“Tastes,” a harsh suck, “so good,” another, “better than I remember.”
You know he’s talking, but his words fall on deaf ears. You’re so caught up in your own high, you don’t even take notice of the obscene sloshing sounds coming from your pussy, or the moans you’re making. All you can do is lay there and take it as he takes, and takes, and takes from you.
Soon, you find your orgasm cutting through you like a knife, and you come with a strangled cry that has you biting back tears. Satoru talks you through the whole thing. He lays his head down on your thigh and continues working you with his fingers until you start to shake from the overstimulation.
For a few, you lay and stare at the ceiling. You think you can see the Milky Way–and all the constellations that make it up. It feels like your soul is floating beyond your physical body, and you don’t come back down to Earth until a sharp, stinging sensation brings you back. Did he just?
“Did you just bite me?” you lift your head, peering down to see the evidence. In all its glory, there it was; a red ring smack-dab in the inside of your thigh with teeth imprints. Looking at Satoru, he grins.
“Had to get you back from earlier,” he says, sitting back on his knees. You attempt to kick him with your foot, but he grabs hold of it. Pretending to be wounded, he gasps, “Is this how you treat the man who just gave you a soul-shattering orgasm?”
You roll your eyes, but to your dismay, it only encourages him to continue.
“Fuck, Toru,” he mimics, “oh my god, Toru. You fuck me so goo–”
“Alright, enough!” you manage to kick him this time, laughing as you bring up your hands to cover your face. “Keep carrying on like that and I won’t let you fuck me…” You’re serious in your bite, but he’s smirking. Like he knows you’re full of bullshit.
“Yeah right. You and I both know I make you feel too good.”
Feeling bested, you scoff, though, there’s no real weight behind it. While he begins to remove his shirt, you sit up and replace his hands. He relinquishes control and allows you to unbutton it until the item falls haphazardly to the floor.
He’s so beautiful, you think. Still so chiseled, so perfect after all these years since you’ve last seen him like this. At his most vulnerable. The only difference now is that there are more freckles littered across his skin. Back then, he’d say they were signs of aging, and he’d hate them.
But he’s older now. More mature. So much so that he even winks at you when you trace your fingertips over them.
“They suit you,” you whisper.
“Yeah?”
You nod your head, “mhm.”
Continuing your ministrations, you begin removing his belt. He holds your gaze the entire time it takes for you to unzip his pants and pull them down–and he doesn’t once shy away when you discover the wet spot on the front of his briefs. Slowly, delicately, you remove the soiled item and let it fall down to the floor with the rest of his clothes.
Still looking at him, you take hold of his length and fist him once, twice, experimentally. A dribble of pre oozes from his slit and you bring it to your mouth. All the air in his lungs expel into the air when you lick it off with your tongue, and god, he thinks he could come from that alone.
God, he’s missed you. Missed your touch, your lips–the way you hold him with your eyes like he’s something worth being gentle with. Nothing could ever compare to you, not even his own hand.
As soon as you’re about to take him in your mouth, he stops you. Pushes you back down onto the bed and slots himself between your legs. “No more playing, I’m tired of playing,” he breathes, lowering himself down until half of his weight is on top of you.
Guiding his cock to your entrance, he pushes past your folds with little resistance. The feeling of your cunt squeezing him in has his arms wobbling like jelly, but he musters enough strength somehow to stay up. You, on the other hand, are close to tears.
The more he eases himself in, the more you feel like you’re being stretched open (despite him previously prepping you). If you were being truthful, this wasn’t a complete shock to you. You’ve known that he’s always been big, but something about tonight feels different. Or maybe it’s just been too long since you’ve had something more than just your own fingers.
Even so, you try your best to ignore the burn of the stretch. You throw your arms around his neck and invite him deeper into you, hooking your legs around him so tightly that it renders his limbs useless. For a minute, all you can feel is the weight of him inside of you, and his chest against yours as they rise and fall asynchronously.
“Toru,” your voice is just barely above a whisper, but enough to make the hairs on the nape of his neck stand. “Make love to me.”
Heeding your request, he begins moving. Painfully slow, he unsheathes himself from you until only the head of his cock is inside, then pushes himself all the way back in with force. Again, and again, he repeats this motion. Pulls out, pushes in. Pulls out, pushes in, until he decides to increase his pace and set a steady rhythm.
Every thrust into you is meticulously calculated. Sharp, and forceful, and not once does he disrupt the rhythm. He listens carefully to the sounds you make. Even listens to the way your breath hitches when he hits a spot right. Everything he’s doing is perfect–and it’s to no surprise. Deep down, you know that Satoru knows your body like the back of his hand. He’d know it if you were all old and wrinkly. He’d know it if his soul reincarnated. Hell, he’d know it blind.
“Missed this,” he grunts, burying his head into the interstice of your neck, “missed you,” a kiss to your neck, “missed us.”
The veracity of his words render you speechless. He’s already professed his feelings for you tonight, but it feels even more real now that you’re beneath him. To be loved by Gojo Satoru was a feeling many couldn’t say they had the consolation of knowing. Only a few in his circle could hold that position–but only one person in this world could truly ever know his love to its fullest extent. You.
Satoru continues his mindless rambling, “I love you,” a thrust, “it’s always been you,” another, “was always going to be you.” Leaning back on his heels, he pushes your dress all the way up to reveal your breasts. Now it’s him who sits back and admires this time. As if he were reacquainting himself, he traces the planes and pastures of your chest with an eager hand. He runs it up and over each mound, squeezing and kneading the flesh experimentally.
Then, he dips down and kisses the space between them. Sucks and licks until the skin bruises, and he has evidence to prove tonight actually happened. Eventually, he withdraws from your chest and returns his focus on easing his cock in and out of your cunt.
“So beautiful,” he says, but it’s more to himself than anything. You’re so lost in your own pleasure, he doesn’t even think you can hear him. “Want you to cum on my cock, know you can do it, baby. Know you can,” he grunts, taking your hand and intertwining it with his own. Letting his head fall into your neck, he begins to quicken his pace. Fucks into you with everything he’s got and willing to give.
“Toru,” you finally manage to say, “‘m so close, keep going. Do it - do it inside.”
Do it inside. Do it inside. Do it inside. The thought is tempting, too tempting. It makes his dick twitch inside of you, and he swears if you say it again, he’ll actually do it. But he knows better than to listen to anything you say out of delirium.
“Trust me, sweet girl,” he cradles your face, to which you lean into, “I want to - I want to so fucking badly. But we both know you’d regret it later.”
Whining, your lips form into a pout, and the sight is so cute, he can’t help but to kiss it off of you. Compared to your kiss earlier, this one is much sweeter. Slower. More relaxed. He kisses you with the intent of making you dizzier than you already are, and it’s scary. Even so, you don’t pull away. You allow him to drink you up. Like your lips are the only source of water around, and he’s been quenched for days.
Finally, with a few more thrusts, you reach your climax. The pressure building in the pit of your belly pops like a balloon, and everything goes white. “Toru!” you shriek, arching off the bed and trembling in his grasp.
Using your arch as leverage, he keeps his hands underneath your back and continues to ram into you without abandon. You’re a babbling, wet mess at this point, and your cunt squeezing around him only encourages him more.
“Fuckfuckfuck, ‘m gonna - ‘m gonna,” he curses, balls beginning to tighten. Quickly, he unsheathes himself and fists himself the rest of the way. With an impassioned moan, he climaxes–spurting thick, white, ropes of seed all over your abdomen. Then, falls onto your limp body with a grunt, chest heaving rapidly, and slick with perspiration.
By this time, you’ve settled down enough to form a proper sentence. “That was…”
Satoru huffs, catching his breath. “Yeah.”
Still spent, he continues to lay atop you. And you, having nowhere else to go, let him. The two of you lay comfortably in silence like this for a long time. Just you tracing shapes into his back, and him purring into your neck. Both of you know you should be getting up, but neither of you make an effort to do so. In this moment, time is transcendent. There is no rush to move when time stands still for you.
Soon, that silence is broken.
“I love you,” you say, and there’s no elaboration. Not even a recant. In fact, you say it so nonchalantly, he’s not even sure it was real. You say it like you’ve never been more certain in your life, like it’s the easiest thing you’ve ever had to do.
“Really?” he queries, almost pathetically like the mere idea of you loving him is something unattainable. You look at him like he’s got two heads.
“Yeah, you’re my best friend. I’ve always loved you,” you admit, pausing your ministrations on his back, “I just had to relearn how to love you.” He smiles at this, hums into your neck to keep from crying.
“I’m glad we found our way back to each other,” he mumbles into your neck, “so where do we go from here?”
“From here we take it slow. We’ll learn together what it means to be individuals, and then from there we’ll see where it goes,” you say matter-of-factly, “no more repeating past mistakes.”
“Agreed,” he nods, “what will we tell the girls?”
That’s when your eyes widen and you sit up, forcefully pushing Satoru off of you.
“What did I say, what’s wrong?” he queries, sitting up on the bed. He watches you rummage around the room maniacally, head on a swivel as you run out of the room and return with a purse. You pull your phone out to see a slew of missed calls and messages.
“We forgot to call the girls!” You yell, showing him your phone screen of missed calls. Gojo jumps up to join you, one leg already sliding into his pants.
“Shit!”
Noticing the state of your appearance, you pinch the skin between your brows. “Satoru, I can’t wear this! You got cum all over it,” you groan, pointing to all the splotches of white. He tells you to wait a second before disappearing into his closet, then he comes back with a fist of clothes and throws it at you.
“I can’t wear this either, they’ll wonder why I’m wearing your clothes!”
Satoru runs to you and pull the dress off of your body, “We’ll wash it!” he screams, disappearing again out of the room, and to where you imagine, the laundry room. When he returns, he’s out of breath and panting. It’s only then do you realize how insane he looks with half his shirt buttoned, and his pants twisted around his hips. A giggle escapes your lips.
“What are you laughing at? Chop chop,” he claps, ushering you into his bathroom.
Yeah, you’d be lying if you said you didn’t miss this idiot.
comments + reblogs very appreciated !!!
© arachine 2023
#art by: @yamada_souko (twt)#gojo satoru x reader#gojo satoru x reader smut#satoru gojo x reader#satoru gojo x reader smut#gojo satoru smut#satoru gojo smut#gojo satoru x you#satoru gojo x you#gojo satoru x y/n#satoru gojo x y/n#jjk smut
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asking them stupid questions — all brothers
a/n: having a hard time writing smut atm so here’s some silly headcanons with the brothers. i was really tired when i proofread this so there may be some mistakes.
tags: 2k words, no gender specified, reader x lucifer, mammon, leviathan, satan, asmodeus, beelzebub + belphegor. (belphie’s is a little suggestive).
𝐋𝐔𝐂𝐈𝐅𝐄𝐑
lucifer has had enough.
it’s been a long day and he wished for a quiet night in his office to relax with some tea while overlooking the bills his brothers have riled up.
but he’s quite distracted tonight.
peace and quiet is not an option. especially with you loitering, floating around his office and touching all the trinkets and décor. you’ve never shown interest in them before, but tonight, all of a sudden lucifer’s office is the most inviting place in the world.
“mc?”
“yes, honey?”
“is something the matter.”
there is a painstakingly long silence before you answer. “….no.”
letting out a little sigh, he asks, “are you quite sure?”
you hum with a subtle nod, barely looking him in the eye and he is now certain something is wrong.
“mc, please. if you aren’t feeling well, you can tell me about it. you don’t need to make this difficu—”
“would you still love me if i was a worm?”
“what?” lucifer’s voice croaks.
“it’s just that i felt sad thinking about how you might not love me anymore if one day i turned into a worm and couldn’t turn back into me.”
“mc, in what world would you ever turn into a worm?”
“most likely this one. remember that time mammon accidentally turned me into a sheep in spells class? i was cute as a sheep, so it was okay. but as a worm, i’d be small and slimy and gross. i’d be unloveable.”
“that is enough,” he rises from his chair, speaking with command but still gentle enough to not upset you further. “you shouldn’t think of such things. it is so silly of you to think i would ever stop loving you.”
“luci….”
“if i must spell it out for you, then yes. i would still love you if you were a worm and i would carry you everywhere with me to ensure you’re never lost or hurt. i would need something small and protective to carry you in, but yes. i will always love you.”
𝐌𝐀𝐌𝐌𝐎𝐍
“if there was a zombie apocalypse and i was bitten, what would you do?”
“hah?!” mammon’s face contorts at your random question. “what are ya talking about?”
“i’ve been thinking about that movie we watched….the zombie one. and just wondered what it would be like.”
“gave up on surviving already, did ya?” he chuckles, collapsing onto his bed beside you, his hand resting on your waist.
“no, but i wanna know! what would you do if i turned into a zombie?”
“well….what are the options?” his smirk earns him a playful smack on the chest. “hey! i’m serious. i’ll be so sad that i won’t be able to think straight, so ya need to give me some options.”
“fine,” you pout, scratching your brain for solutions. “i suppose the most humane thing to do would be to kill me. you know, to make sure i’m not forced to live as a mindless zombie eating other humans.”
“okay….”
“or you could tie me up, maybe chain me, and keep me alive by feeding me living people.”
“why would i keep ya around if you’re gonna stink like a rotting corpse?”
while mammon laughs, your brows furrow with annoyance, mostly feigned but there’s a small sense of hurt in there when you think about mammon not wanting to keep you after you turn into a zombie, despite it being completely logical and reasonable.
“hey,” his voice is soft as he leans over and kisses your cheek, “don’t worry. i’d handcuff us together and let you bite me. then we can be zombies together and never be separated.”
𝐋𝐄𝐕𝐈𝐀𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐍
movie night always means one thing, and that’s you and levi curling up with tangled limbs and a hoard of cushions and blankets. a joint blanket burrito with little space between you but that’s a good thing.
the closeness makes it cosier.
tonight, you opted for a more emotional movie. a romance, but romances are always emotional for both of you. that’s why you try your best to stay away from the romantic movies and stick to action packed fantasies or sci-fi’s that are the furthest thing from romance.
but there was a new and popular movie making the headlines and levi couldn’t wait to watch it. you knew watching it was a lost hope, and now you’re sobbing in levi’s arms watching the struggles the love interests are going through to get to each other.
“i’m so glad it wasn’t that difficult for us to be together,” you sniffle, feeling a wave of gratitude take over. “i love you, levi.”
“i love you, too,” his voice trembles and he quietly wipes his own tears.
“hey, levi?”
“what is it?”
“can i wipe my nose on you?”
“what? no!”
too late. you buried your head into his chest, wiping your face clean and covering his favourite shirt in snot.
“gross!”
“i’m sorry. i wanted to get a tissue but they’re too far away. i didn’t want to leave the burrito.”
“it’s fine,” he grumbles, begrudgingly patting you on the head to tell you it’s okay despite ruining his shirt. “let’s finish the movie.”
𝐒𝐀𝐓𝐀𝐍
“would you still love me if i told you the truth?”
satan tries to hide his piqued interest, like he usually does. he likes to come off as the too–cool–to–show–i–care kind of guy but the truth is, he is more invested in this truth than anything else.
he nonchalantly turns the page of his book and with a swipe of his tongue over his lips, he asks, “what truth?”
“that i’m really a lizard.”
well, he wasn’t expecting that.
he watches you intently over the pages of his book. you stop pacing around the library and make your way to him, showing no expression on your face. usually, he would be quite good at reading your face but in all honesty, he can’t tell if you’re serious or not.”
“a lizard?”
you nod. “a lizard.”
“you don’t look like a lizard.”
“that’s because i’m a lizard pretending to be a human.”
“a what now?” he shuts his book, sitting upright from his laid position. he tried his hardest not to give in to your silly but mysterious notion but he is far more interested in your explanation.
“you know about the lizard people, right?”
“i do not.”
“so i just exposed myself for nothing?”
“what in the devildom are you talking about?”
“it doesn’t matter. forget i said anything. if anyone finds out i told you, i could get killed.”
“please tell me that isn’t true.”
silence.
you refuse to even look him in the eye. surely, you are joking. there’s no way you’re really a lizard, let alone it be possible for lizards to be secretly living inside of humans. what kind of conspiracy would that be?
it’s unimaginable, even for demons. but whether the lizard thing is true or he’s falling for a joke, you still need an answer to your question.
“yes,” he pulls you into his side. “i would still love you if you were really a lizard.”
𝐀𝐒𝐌𝐎𝐃𝐄𝐔𝐒
“asmo,” you sing the demon of lust’s name, catching the attention that he would devote to you at any given moment. “can i ask you something?”
“go ahead, my dearest. fire away.”
he winks, hoping it would be something on the more flirtatious side, but instead you fill his mind with a grotesque image.
“what would you do if you could never touch me again?”
he immediately smothers you with a hug. “what are you talking about?! of course, that would never happen!”
“but what if?” you snuggle into him further. “what if you could never touch me?”
he hums, thinking of any solution to be able to touch you again.
“i’d cry,” he says simply. “i’d cry a lot.”
“aww,” you pout. “i don’t want you to cry.”
“and i don’t want to imagine a world where i can’t hold you like this,” he kisses your lips, “where i can’t kiss you like this,” he lifts up your hand and intertwines your fingers with his, “where i can’t hold your hand like this.”
“asmo….”
“i don’t know what would ever cause me to never be able to touch you again, but it would be the end of my world if it came true. i don’t know if i’d be able to live.”
“you’d still be able to see me and speak to me.”
“but not being able to touch you when i see you and hear you is the most painful torture imaginable. but you know what that means, right?”
“what does it mean?” you squeal and his hands tickle your sides.
“it means i need to do all the touching i can now to make up for it!”
𝐁𝐄𝐄𝐋𝐙𝐄𝐁𝐔𝐁
“hey, beel?”
“yeah?”
your quiet voices fill the dark path home from rad. beel always walks you home; be it in comfortable silence or deep conversations, you don’t imagine walking home any other way.
and the quiet air of the evening provides the perfect chance to ask him a question you’ve been waiting to ask all day.
“can i ask you something?”
“sure.”
“if i had five million cheeseburgers and you could only eat them if you slapped me in the face, what wou—”
“i’d slap you in the face.”
“i didn’t even finish my question.” you yelp, brows furrowing in frustration.
“you don’t need to finish it. i’d do anything to eat that many cheeseburgers.”
your feet plant in the ground and beel doesn’t stop walking until your hand which holds his pulls him back.
“are you serious?”
“uhmm….i think so?”
you’re grateful for the fact that he’s rethinking his answer but it was a shock to hear him say he’d slap you so firmly in the beginning. it was a stupid question to ask in the first place, but you never imagined beel ever wanting to hurt you.
he tugs on your hand and you continue walking with him, picking up the pace to get home.
“mc….” he asks. “did i say something wrong?”
his obliviousness to his own words is a harder slap in the face than the slap he promised those five million burgers.
“you said you’d slap me, beel, and it makes me sad.”
“hm….we can go halfsies on the burgers?”
“huh?”
“i’ll slap you and then we can share the burgers.” he promises. “you’d feel bad because i slapped you. and i’d feel bad because i slapped you. so to make it better for both of us, we can split the cheeseburgers.”
you look at him, astounded because you don’t know if his explanation makes his answer better or worse.
𝐁𝐄𝐋𝐏𝐇𝐄𝐆𝐎𝐑
a cuddling session in the attic with belphegor is exactly what you needed after a long, draining day. you naturally made your way up to him as soon as you had some free time, desperate for his warmth.
but belphie had a different warmth in mind with all the kisses he litters up and down your neck.
“belphie, i’m tired.” you whine, but still urge him on to kiss you harder.
“then close your eyes. i’ll kiss you until you fall asleep.”
your heart swarms with the thrill of his words, the promise of being here and showering you with affection even on your worst days.
“is something wrong?” he asks.
“no. why?”
“you’re not falling asleep.”
“that’s because you’re kisses are keeping me awake.”
“they’re meant to help you fall asleep.”
“i hate to break it to you belphie, but they’re having the opposite effect.” you tease.
“is that so?” he nibbles you ear. “what about this?”
you arch into his body, sensitive from his kisses and now the more urgent movements of his lips ignite a fire in your belly. his lips graze you, teeth nip you and tongue swipe over your skin. he sucks hard enough to leave bruises, and kisses softly on every mark he leaves.
“belphie….” the soft whisper of his name catches his attention. “how many ghosts do you think are watching us right now?”
he ceases for a moment, then lifts his head from the crook of your neck. “what?”
“what if there’s ghosts watching us right now? and what if they keep watching us while we….you know….?”
“i never thought of that before.”
“it’s weird, right?”
“definitely. let’s never have sex again.”
#♡ pearl’s writing#obey me#obey me shall we date#obey me headcanons#obey me x reader#obey me fluff#obey me lucifer#obey me lucifer x reader#obey me mammon#mammon x reader#obey me leviathan#obey me levi x reader#obey me satan#obey me satan x reader#obey me asmodeus#obey me asmodeus x reader#obey me beelzebub#obey me beel x reader#obey me belphegor#belphegor x reader
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in like a one person gets one, who would dicks soulmate (platonic or not idk) be? i’ve asked this to several ppl and the answers are usually wally, donna, or jason though i’ve seen some ppl say slade, roy, and bruce.
Anon your ask has literally been haunting me at night. I thought I knew the answer but then you hit me with a Donna!! But between Bruce and Donna, I can't decide so I'll just present a case for both.
Bruce
Bruce and Dick are soulmates on a cosmological scale. The DC universe ordained them to always find each other because they're quite literally a fated pair.
Batman: Legends of the Dark Knight Issue #23
Bruce: The only regret is that I'm out there alone. It felt good having someone at my back, being part of a team...but no sense wasting time wishing for something I'll never have.
Dick: He's cool, dad...d'you think we'll ever see him when we play Gotham?
The universe literally brings them together no matter the circumstances.
Convergence Issue #4
"The bond between you and Bruce Wayne echoes in every reality."
I don't think there's any stronger evidence for Dick and Bruce being soulmates than this.
But if that's still not enough I have more-
The Multiversity: Guidebook
In Bruce's world he lost Dick and in Dick's world he lost Bruce, but still in the end they somehow find each other. In every universe that has Batman, if someone is his partner it's always Dick.
In the medieval ages world-
Batman: Dark Knight of the Round Table Issue #1
The world of "A Christmas Carol" with Ebenezer Scrooge -
Batman: Noël
In a world where Bruce is a doctor at Arkham -
The Batman of Arkham
Dick is always there as his second.
Here's another interesting but depressing fact: In worlds where Dick Grayson has died as Robin, Bruce Wayne has never taken in another Robin.
This is because on top of the fact that Dick and Bruce as fated to meet, Dick means the entire world for Bruce. Like sometimes Bruce will come across a case with a child involved and the first thing he'll think about is Dick.
Batman: City of Madness Issue #2
Bruce's mind and life is literally consumed by Dick Grayson on a cosmologically spiritual level.
Donna
Donna is Dick's soulmate on a twin-sister spiritual level. Dick and Bruce are two halves of a whole, yin and yang. Dick and Donna though are one person. Their relationship is like taking paint and mixing it together to get something new. Like in those comics where two people look at each other and there's a "zing!" and suddenly it's an instant connection. That's them.
Titans (2016) Special 1
additionally:
Titans (2016) Special 1
New Titans (1988) Issue #89
Dick and Donna have no secrets. They're like a jigsaw puzzle, their pieces fall right into place.
He's always there for her-
The New Teen Titans (1980) Issue #38
They're so special and integral to each other that when an evil witch erases Donna from everyone's memories, there is only one focal point for her. One focal person for her throughout the years. Even though he doesn't remember her, Dick literally goes back in time with his future daughter Mar'i to help Donna, his soul-sister-
The Titans (1999) Issue #25
In every. single. moment of Donna's past Dick appears again and again to comfort her and be her pillar from Robin to civies to Nightwing. In the "Who is Donna Troy" Arc, as the story goes from the origins of Donna to the present, it becomes very clear that Dick is her centerpoint.
They're the definition of soulmates.
She knows him better than anyone else and he knows her. She even had him walk her Donna the aisle for her wedding. He was given that honor because of who they are to each other.
Tales of the Teen Titans Issue #42
I...
just-
Tales of the Teen Titans Issue #50
to love like that...
They're made for each other.
#dick grayson#nightwing#bruce wayne#batman#donna troy#wonder girl#troia#robin dick grayson#dc titans#titans as family#cl anon asks#cl asks#thanks for the ask!#koriandr#starfire
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A blurb on spencer with the audio thats like “I always thought you were the most beautiful girl i’ve ever seen” and it’s to reader? :))
love this !! and i don't care if it's such a cliche image, I'm not going to stop
Spencer jumps when you slide the balcony door open. Even with the serial killer caught, you're all still on edge, chilly in the Alaskan spring.
"Sorry, I hope you don't mind me interrupting." You step forward and close the door to stop any heat from the fire escaping inside.
"Not at all," Spencer assures you, smiling softly to encourage you forward.
You stand next to him, looking out over at the hill and evergreen trees, everything with a fresh dumping of snow on it. The sun's just setting even though it's not too far into the afternoon, the sky beginning to turn soft pink and orange.
"Things were getting a bit tense inside." You laugh at the very recent memory of some passionate arguing.
"Prentiss and Morgan?" Spencer guesses. You confirm with a nod. "Hotch should add Uno to the list of banned games."
You laugh at the rare joke from him. "We're not going to have anything left now that Monopoly, Clue, and all card games are banned."
"We'll have to all play chess." He decides, matching his enthusiasm with a grin.
"Then you'll have to sit out so it's fair." You remind him with a smirk.
He pouts at that, not the answer he was after. A comfortable silence falls between you as you watch the sky changing colors. It's really like nothing you've seen before, and it's a nice reminder that there's still beauty in the world.
"It's just wow." You say softly, in awe.
"The stars will be out soon," Spencer notes. "They should be incredible. It's meant to be clear and there's no light pollution here like there is in DC."
"You looked it up?" You wonder. It's sweet, really, and his interest seems to go beyond adding to his vast general knowledge.
He turns to you to nod. "I'm going to come out after dinner to watch them. I've never seen anything like this in the cities I've lived in, and we don't get many cases in such beautiful, remote places."
You hum with your own nod. "You're right. Or..." Your curiosity doesn't allow you to resist the opportunity to segue the conversation. "Many beautiful people, like the deputy that's into you."
You're trying to disguise it as teasing him, at least then you can play it off as being teammates and friends, and you're desperately hoping he doesn't notice that you're tense about his answer.
His nose scrunches slightly. Maybe disgust, maybe excitement. "I wasn't looking."
"Not your type?" You ask, slightly alarmed again. You do share some similar traits with her, so if she's not his type, your chances are slimmer.
"I always thought you were the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen." He says sincerely, knocking the wind out of your chest. "So, no, Y/n, I'm not looking at anyone."
You take longer than you should to get over your shock. "You're serious?"
"Sorry, sorry." He quickly apologizes as his cheeks heat up more than can be accounted for by the cold weather. "That was weird. I didn't want to make you uncomfortable."
"No." You rest your hand over his, hoping to calm his spiraling worry. "You didn't... just thank you. That's... the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me."
"It's true." He reiterates.
Your smile deepens. "Can I come stargazing with you?" You ask. "I promise I won't distract you."
"Looking like that? Impossible." He jokes, flirtier than you imagine. It's like your reciprocation spurs him on. "But I'd love company... your company, specifically. Inviting someone else would be weird."
You chuckle. "Just me and you."
#spencer reid#criminal minds#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid x you#spencer reid x y/n#spencer reid blurb
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Rambling thoughts of various Yuri manga I’ve read
1. Kase-San and Yamada (Morning Glories sequel series) by Hiromi Takashima
notice how Kase’s name is first, which is representative of her being the main one to cause problems in their relationship
If you asked me what my favorite yuri manga was like 2-3 years ago, I’d say Morning Glories and Kase San everytime. Every avid yuri fan has either read or watched Morning Glories because, at the time in 2010, it was groundbreaking, and I stand by the fact that the original series still holds up to this day. It was cute, sweet, wholesome and only had a few obligatory “we love each other but we’re giRLs😳😳😳” moments. Most of all it wasn’t a pseudo-incest-straight-male-porn-pandering-garbage-fest—also known as “Citrus”. Was it cliche at times? Yes, but they all are lol. Did they add to the dumb ass “blonde femme and dark hair masc” trope? Also yes. But it was adorable and it was my first ever yuri so it holds a special place in my heart.
And it SEEMED like it was only going to get better in Kase San and Yamada, the sequel. The girls would be heading to college and the story could theoretically focus on more mature topics while they navigate their new relationship. Keyword: theoretically. Unfortunately, instead of exploring interesting relationship dynamics and storylines, the plot of each story arc boils down to: Kase is insecure because a man breathed next to Yamada or Kase is being completely insensitive to Yamada’s feelings…again…—> ✨miscommunication drama ✨—>big over dramatic apology scene—>boring makeup sex or other romantic gesture.
Literally that’s how every single plotline goes. Kase is so goddamn dumb and insensitive to Yamada’s feelings and Yamada’s a complete doormat who can only stay mad for 0.2 seconds before getting pussy whipped like a spineless ass bitch. And for all that Yamada sacrifices for Kase; her hometown, her dreams, her apartment, what does she get in return from Kase? Oh that’s right; bare minimum romantic gestures and a neglectful partner who can’t even call her “girlfriend” in front of others:
Like I thought we were over this shit. It’s been THREE years of them together, a whole anime production, and god knows how many irl years and we’re going back to “we love each other but we’re giRLs😳😳😳” WHY???
And then Kase later goes onto bet her entire three year relationship over the ugly bitch in the next panel, so now I’m questioning whether or not Kase even loves Yamada with the amount of bullshit she’s put her through. Which COULD be an interesting plot point, but Kase never gets any consequences for her actions and the creator genuinely thinks this is romantic and full of tension so I’m 10000% positive that this arc, just like all the others, will end with some makeup sex and we’ll be right back to step 1. Sigh.
2. Tamen De Gushi by Tan Jiu
Tamen De Gushi’s problems are interesting but it’s NOT because of the Chinese government💀
So today’s dark haired masc and blonde femme of the day are Sun Jing and Qiu Tong, respectively. Their personalities aren’t anything to write home about, if you read ANY high school yuri romance, then you know exactly what happens in this story beat for beat. But, BUT, however derivative it is, I find their dynamic very endearing and down to earth. Idk maybe it’s just the translation, but other yuri stories often have this very inauthentic “anime” vibe to it. Which is to say the characters act very cutesy, overly dramatic, and have this stilted, caricature-esque acting of how the creator thinks teenage girls are supposed act.
However, I’m happy to report that Tamen De Gushi is a breath of fresh air in this regard. The characters and interactions they have are grounded and feel organic, which makes them feel like real people, not aliens pretending to be human. This really elevates the humor in turn, oh did I mention that Tamen De Gushi is super funny? Because Tamen De Gushi is super funny, here’s one of my favorite panels and it’s all because of Sun Jing’s goofy ahh expression:
Like go girl give us nothing
If you’re wondering why I haven’t spoke much about the actual romantic relationship between the girls, that’s because there isn’t one💀 Which, okay, that’s not a fair assessment, they have a ton of romantic tension and they flirt a lot. It’s certainly building to a great romantic relationship, but it can’t quite get there due to legal/political reasons sadly. 😔
Edit: I received new information in regards to what happened to Tamen De Gushi. While I reached my limit for posting pictures, I want to point out that the Chinese government had nothing to do with Tamen De Gushi getting censored, rather it was a dispute between the author and the publishing company. The prior information I received was false and I prob should’ve looked it up more so sorrrry. The fact still remains though that after their big lesbian kiss towards the middle of the story and maybe a few other moments, that’s just kind of it. You’re stuck waiting for something to develop, but nothing really happens. The comic very quickly becomes a collection of slice of life segments and cute pictures that imply a relationship between the girls, but not really ;) ;). Now things are just kind of left in purgatory for the foreseeable future and, well, that’s Tamen De Gushi y’all.
Compared to Kase San and Yamada, the characters were much better, which is not saying much, but without an actual romantic storyline, there’s just not a lot for me to comment on to be honest. It’s really pretty though, look at this art :
3. Beauty and the Beast Girl by Neji
my personal favorite and the BEST yuri I ever read
So next on the list is Beauty and the Beast Girl (I’m going to abbreviate to BatBG from here on) , which I already spoiled my feelings on the matter so this will basically be me gushing about this story for several paragraphs straight, enjoy.
Contrary to what the title suggests, it really has nothing to do with Beauty and the Beast’s story except in name. The main girls are Lily Blind, who is actually fucking blind 💀 and Heath the monster girl. Already I’m happy because instead of blonde femme and dark hair butch, it’s blonde femme and of-course-you-have-purple-hair-and-pronouns masc. Lol, all jokes aside, Lily, unlike her blonde femme counterparts is quite assertive and voices her opinions all the time. In fact, she’s the one who pushes Heath to be more open and communicate with her rather than the other way around. This is, in part, due to the story BatBG is trying to tell. I say BatBG is in name only to Beauty and the Beast because Lily isn’t trying to find the “beauty” within Heath or learning to love a beast or whatever, she’s fine just the way she is and her love for Heath is unconditional. Plus the only thing beastly about Heath is her appearance…which I’ll harp on later, but her behavior is in no way different from a regular human except in very rare, specific moments.
At its heart, BatBG is a story about forgiveness (the creator literally says as much) , but it’s also about the cycle of violence that results from being outcasted and deprived of love. BatBG is set in a world of humans and monsters, where the monsters are outcasted and either have to stay away from human society like Heath or assimilate themselves by hiding away their monster like traits, which is a really queer narrative on top of an already queer story. I don’t want to go into too much spoilers, but sometime before the beginning of the story, Heath in-directly hurts Lily before they ever meet. However, it’s not about Lily needing to forgive Heath, or trying to get over the pain she inflicted upon her, rather its Heath learning to forgive herself and in effect, learning to love herself as much as Lily loves her.
Another big aspect of BatBG is disabilities, Lily Blind is in fact Blind lol and while there are times she struggles with her blindness, she never views her disability as something she needs to be ashamed of and never, ever, blames Heath for it or holds it against her unlike what many, many, many, many other stories end up doing. Her blindness isn’t treated like a super power either, it’s a legitimate disability. She just accepts that it’s a part of her and goes onto say that if not for her blindness, she would’ve never met the love of her life, which I found to be an incredibly profound thing to say.
Now that I’ve gotten this far, I suppose I can add a bit of a disclaimer. So BatBG is waaaaay more explicit about the physical affection between the girls than in any of the previous stories I talked about. Heath and Lily are constantly kissing on, hugging, and almost always flirting with each other, and make no mistake, these girls do be fucking. The sex scenes are never perverted or gross, but genuinely super sweet and romantic, which makes it way hotter imo (huh imagine that🤔). And aside from being hot, it also serves a purpose! Lily’s pretty damn horny underneath all her nice girl antics and while it’s not a major part of her character, it does give a slight edge to her personality and, most importantly, balances out the dynamic between Heath and Lily. It would’ve been very easy to fall into that boring trope where Heath is aggressively horny and Lily is the submissive blind girl, but by making Lily be the one to initiate the sexual encounters, it not only compliments Heath’s more reserved nature, but breaks the stereotype that people with disabilities are pure precious being who couldn’t possibly have sex, which is ableist af btw. Many people think the existence of any sex scenes at all is superfluous, but in BatBG, it truly elevates the story, the characters, and the romance in ways that wouldn’t be nearly as satisfying without it.
Now, with as much praise I gave BatBG, there is one criticism I have, but it’s a quibble really, and it can be explained in a single image:
There is a dissonance between the story and the art, the story says: “Heath is a big, ugly scary monster”
The art says:
And like yes, it can be argued that Heath is simply regurgitating the things bigoted people have said to her, but at no point in the story is this ever challenged or brought up in any meaningful way. Lily is blind so she doesn’t know what the hell she looks like and the other characters aren’t any help either. It’s not a big deal or anything, it just would’ve elevated the story if Heath was actually kinda ugly/more monstrous and not incredibly beautiful because right now it’s giving skinny girl who calls herself fat all the time, and it’s like, babe, who tf are you fooling? 😭
Other than that, BatBG is incredibly profound despite its premise being so deceptively simple and I love it to pieces so …yeah! READ IT.
4. Superwomen in Love! Honey Trap and Rapid Rabbit by sometime
Well, at least there are no blondes
So imma just abbreviate to SiL btw
Alright, let’s get started. The premise is that a villainess falls for the super hero girl and then that plotline is dropped in about 16 pages. I’m not even joking, the villainess falls for the hero, loses her job as a villain and then joins the hero all in one chapter. The REAL plot is actually about a council of evil alien-humans who want to destroy humanity because of generic super villain reason #434: the leader of the aliens is sad and misunderstood :( I’m not even going to lie, I had 0 interest in “X” (the generic ass name of the main villain) and her band of useless lesbians. They did literally nothing in the story except be a nuisance and contribute to X’s incel breakdown at the end. Their inclusion actively made SiL worse because the story has this weird tonal problem where in one breath the villains are portrayed as complete jokes and then you turn the page and now they’re shooting children like girl what💀 And these useless lesbians hog sooooo much of SiL that desperately needed to be given to Honey trap and Hayate to develop their relationship.
When the story DOES actually focus on Honey Trap and Hayate, it’s pretty good, even cute at times, there just wasn’t enough time given to them to flesh their relationship out. As it stands, Honey Trap and Hayate don’t have much of a dynamic, or personality for that matter. Honey Trap’s main gimmick is that she’s extremely horny for Hayate and delulu:
Aside from that, she’s a great value version of Heath, but even a watered down character is better than, like, nothing. All I really know about Hayate is that she’s nice, heroic, likes wearing tacky clothes and ….that’s it. She loves Honey Trap because…………they fought together a few times so why not🤷♀️ I’d say at least that’s better than Tamen De Gushi, but actually it’s not because these grown ass women don’t even kiss , all we get is a love confession and their gremlin love child and that’s supposed to be satisfying I guess.
And the worst part is that SiL has the audacity to pretend the romance was something that it clearly wasn’t:
Girl…yall were “””enemies””” for 10 panels.
Now, it’s stated they have been rivals for a while, but I guess Honey Trap forgot all of that because the moment she sees Hayate’s face, my good sis is pussy whipped for life. And that’s in spite of apparently being the evilest one out of the evil group because Honey Trap has no grudge or baggage toward Hayate. She immediately turns good with no issues and Hayate is only distrustful of Honey Trap for 1 or 2 speech bubbles and then she’s not. Anything else that happened was off screen, which means it didn’t happen. Ironically, the very next entry on this list will do a MUCH better job at an ex-villain love story, but for SiL, there’s just not much going on.
Another reading of this story is to call it a “parody” but…no, it isn’t. SiL isn’t a comedy, yes there are comedic moments that poke fun of the genre, but the rest of the story genuinely wants you to take it seriously. Except it can’t. X and her league of dimwits are boring as piss and they oscillate between Saturday morning cartoon villains and child murderers seemingly on a whim. So I can neither be endeared to them nor take them as a serious threat. Honey Trap and Hayate are there, but I lament on all the potential lost from what could’ve been an amazing relationship.
5. Yamujiburo/Kianamaiart’s Hanamusa webcomic
This one is kind of cheating, but I also don’t care let me talk about hot MILFs💀
So the final entry on this list is a webcomic series by one of my fave artist: kianamaiart! And it’s right here on tumblr so check it out!
I stumbled upon this webcomic a few weeks ago, fell in love and now I want to talk about it. This yuri pair thankfully has no blonde femme in sight and instead features two popular Pokémon characters: Jessie from Team Rocket and Delia Ketchum, Ash Ketchum’s mom. What I love about this ship and the world Kiana creates around them is that it’s a very unconventional pairing. There’s just not many romances where a single mom falls in love with an ex gang member and the best part is, Delia being a mom is a big part of her character and she doesn’t ignore Ash in favor of her new relationship with Jessie. She has time for both and doesn’t prioritize one over the other, which many ppl fail to do even irl so good on you Delia!
Now, as for the romance it self, Jessie and Delia are a unique pair. Jessie’s overconfident, brash, drama queen personality doesn’t automatically put her in the “dominant” role and Delia’s sweet, motherly personality doesn’t automatically put her in the “submissive” role. Their dynamic in the webcomic actually plays out in the reverse, Jessie is the one who gets easily flustered and Delia’s…intense, to say the least:
(But Tbf if Delia looked at me like that I’d be at her beck and call too💀)
This subversion of these tropes creates a fun dynamic for the couple and it’s super adorable to see how their energies bounce off each other in each new situation Kiana puts them in. I also love how both Jessie and Delia inspire each other to live out their dreams and they become better versions of themselves by being together.
And one last thing, I don’t have any smart commentary to go along with this, I just really like this drawing of Jessie:
no thoughts, head empty
Final Thoughts
Soooo yeah, that’s the end of my dissertation on yuri comics. I know I ended up dragging a lot of popular yuri, but it wasn’t my intention to make you guys hate any of things I talked about. These were just my thoughts as an avid yuri fan, so let me know your thoughts as well, especially if you read any of the yuri I talked about. And even though I’m super picky about the type of yuri I read, I’d still love to hear any recommendations. Who knows, it might dethrone the undefeated champ that is Beauty and the Beast Girl.
#Yuri#yuri manga#long post#Anime#manga#lgbt#lgbtq+#wlw post#kase san and morning glories#tamen de gushi#beauty and the beast girl#superwomen in love#hanamusashipping
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How Things Used To Be
I wonder how long it took me to notice that there was something wrong with Nathan. We had been best friends for years, ever since the 5th grade, and we always hung out together both in and out of school. I was hoping things could’ve stayed like that this summer, but it seemed like fate had other plans. Between family vacations and college prep, it seemed like he didn’t have time for me anymore. And to make it worse, whenever he wasn’t doing that, he was hanging out with some other guys who I had never met, and he never even bothered to ask me if I wanted to come with. I know people grow and change, but I didn’t want to see it happen to my own best friend. On the bright side, we’re going to the same college, so I hope I can see him around.
And I did see him. It was the third week of courses, once I was starting to get acquainted with campus life. For once, I was actually being more social, trying to fill the gap that Nathan left. I used this opportunity to start talking to people in my classes and I found that we had some similar interests. I wish I could say the same for my roommate, but he mostly keeps to himself and we don’t have much in common.
Okay, back to Nathan. I was walking back to the dorms after my last class, texting one of my classmates about the homework. I was interrupted when I walked headfirst into another student. I should’ve been paying more attention to my surroundings. I looked up at the giant in front of me, probably 6’3”, before apologizing.
“James, is that you?” the giant asked. The voice sounded very familiar, yet at the same time, different. I took a closer look at him. “Long time no see, huh?” I was surprised when I realized who it was.
“Nate? Woah, what happened to you?” I couldn’t believe that this person in front of me was my best friend. This was not the same Nathan from three months ago during graduation. He was always a bit taller than me, but he had to have grown at least 3 inches. He used to wear glasses, but it seemed like he switched over to contacts.
In the warm August heat, he was wearing a tank top which revealed his newfound biceps for the whole world to see. The tank top clung closely to his chest and I could see his newly-formed six-pack through the fabric. He was wearing basketball shorts that were short enough that I could catch a glimpse of his thighs, which were just as big as his arms. I never knew Nathan went to the gym, and if he did, he never told me. But still, I couldn’t comprehend how he became so huge in just three months, which made me more curious about what he had been up to. A backwards hat fit tightly atop his head with Greek letters on them. Sigma Lambda Chi… Had Nathan really joined a frat? To be completely honest, he looked like he was cosplaying as a frat bro, a far cry from how I knew him.
“Like what you see, bro?” James chuckled, as he flexed one of his arms. He definitely never came across as a cocky showoff, but I was too distracted by his flexed bicep to notice. I caught myself staring for a second too long, before feeling my face turn red hot. Me and Nathan knew everything about each other, but there was one thing I never told him. I was gay. To tell you the truth, I had a crush on him, but I knew I could never tell him to preserve our friendship. But now he looks even better, and he hasn’t made time for me at all. Now he really felt out of my league.
“I’ve been working out a lot lately. I’m glad you noticed.” He still had his signature smile, but it looked out of place on his new body. His face especially looked a lot more angular and masculine. A visible tan glazed over his body like a fresh coat of paint.
“Daaamn! You look great, dude!” To be honest, I wasn’t sure how to feel talking to him again. On one hand, I was happy to see him again, and, admittedly, a little surprised to see him like this. On the other hand, he ditched me this whole summer to hang out with some other guys. It felt so bittersweet.
“If there weren’t other people around, I’d let you…I mean uh, how have you been bro? I know I’ve been busy a lot lately. Sorry about that, dude.” We told each other what we did over the summer, and wow, was his summer more interesting.
As we caught up, I learned more about what he has been up to. Apparently, he joined a frat and he was hanging out with the guys there more and more. He promised that he’d bring me to a party sometime, but I was hesitant because I’m not much of a party animal. That lifestyle just isn’t for me. He also said he was thinking about joining our school’s football team at the request of his roommate, which I found even more surprising because Nathan never played sports in high school. I did track, but I was never that big into sports myself. Our conversation was interrupted as another guy entered the scene.
“Yo, Nate! Finally found you. You seriously need to get better at texting me back, dude. And who’s this dude?” The guy was wearing the same hat as Nate, so I figured he was one of his frat bros.
“My bad, bro. Brett, this is James. We go way back. James, this is Brett. He’s my roommate. We met over the summer and we’ve been hanging out since.”
“Alright, cool, bro,” Brett responded, clearly impatient and indifferent towards me. He dismissed me entirely, almost like I wasn’t worth his time. “You still going to the gym with me or what?”
“Sorry, bro. I just ran into him and we were catching up.” Nathan responded. “Hey, I gotta get going. We should get food sometime. Peace!” I watched as Nathan and Brett walked away in the opposite direction of me towards the gym. As they moved further away, I could hear Brett chastise him about something. This is the guy that Nathan ditched me for? I hope I’m wrong, but he seemed like kind of a dick. I know I was jealous of him for taking up my best friend’s time, but I didn’t trust him. As for me, I returned to the dorm to work on the assignment with my roommate.
The next time I saw Nate was that weekend, when I held up his promise to get something to eat. I tried to ask him about it earlier in the week, but he was doing stuff at the frat all that time. I was at least grateful that he took time out of his schedule for me for once. He mentioned that he normally doesn’t hang out with anyone who wasn’t in the frat, almost like they were some exclusive bro clique that I was excluded from. For once, it was good to hang out with him one-on-one without any of his frat bros getting in the way. I expected things to be like how they were before, but I couldn’t be any more wrong.
It’s not that I disliked the new Nathan, but I felt like we didn’t have much common ground anymore. It was like he was a completely different person. He didn’t seem to care that much about our old interests anymore. He didn’t have time for video games and he just wasn’t that interested in watching movies or photography anymore. All he seemed to care about was working out all day and partying all night. All he would talk about was some stupid stuff he or one of his bros did.
Plus, he told me he switched his major from mechanical engineering to be a personal trainer. It seemed like he just became a total gym bro overnight. The studious and witty Nathan that I loved kinda just seemed to be a stereotypical meathead now. The worst part was that I knew that this was the same Nathan deep down, and he still treated me the same even if he was a lot busier. I felt like maybe I was the problem since he was clearly still having a good time, and I wasn’t. Why do I feel this way?
I felt my mood change as we talked. Eventually, I figured it was time to cut off the conversation and return to the dorm, but Nathan definitely knew something was off. He texted me later that evening, asking me if everything was alright. To be honest, I wanted to make some lame excuse that I was feeling sick, but we’ve always been honest with each other, so I told him how I really felt.
Me: Nate, to be honest, I think I need some time away from you. I don’t hate you or anything, but it feels like we’ve been growing apart and I feel like you’ve become a different person. I feel like when I look at you, I don’t see the Nathan I’ve known for years, but someone else entirely.
I wanted to say more about how I felt about his new changes, but I didn’t want to escalate things.
Nathan: James, I’m sorry you feel that way about me. I felt like we had a good time today. I’ve grown and changed a lot recently, and I’ve realized a lot about myself, but I’m happy with who I am right now. I know I’m spending a lot of time at the gym or with Brett or my other bros, but I still care about you deeply, bro. You might be right though. Hanging out with you isn’t the same as hanging with the guys at the frat.
Me: Do you honestly see yourself as just a frat boy? You’re more than that. You’re my best friend. But now, you have more in common with the jocks from high school than the Nathan I knew. It’s hard talking to you now since all you care about anymore are your gains and partying. You’re nothing more than a meathead now.
Nathan: So that’s how you see me, bro? The reason I had been avoiding you is because I knew that you wouldn’t like seeing me like this. I guess I was right, bro. But trust me, I’m happy like this. I’m a lot more social than when I was when I was with you, and I’ve even become more in shape too. I care about our friendship more than you can possibly imagine, but I guess this is for the best. To be honest, I think it would be a lot of fun if you were here in the frat with me, but I know you wouldn’t say yes.
I didn’t bother responding. I could never picture myself joining a frat. I would never get along with his frat bro friends, especially Brett, who seemed to be the one he was closest with. I still couldn’t believe Nate would choose him over me. I wasn’t sure whether to feel angry, or sad, or disappointed towards him. I felt like he was wasting his life partying when he should be studying. To think this was the person I cared about more than anyone. It was at this point that I figured I probably wouldn’t have my old friend back. Or so I thought.
A couple weeks passed and I tried to move on from Nathan. I always saw him on his story drinking and partying late into the night at the frat house or posting selfies at the gym. He looked like he was fully embracing his new frat boy persona now. If he didn’t still care about me, it would’ve felt like he was doing it out of spite. As for me, I started to hang out with my classmates more and more, and there was even a guy I went on a date with. It was a nice date and I did like the guy, but for some reason, the thought of Nathan lingered in my mind. Even though I hated what he had become, I couldn’t stop myself from thinking about him. I couldn’t deny how much he turned me on. Why was I still thirsting after a stupid fucking frat bro? One afternoon, after I returned to my dorm, I received a text on my phone. To my surprise, it was Nathan.
“Hey bro, can we talk? There are some things I need to get off my chest.”
I didn’t know what he could possibly want with me now. I suppose I can hear him out just so I can see what he wants. I went over to his room further down the hall, and thankfully Brett was not here to ruin the moment. Nate said that he was doing some preparations for some stuff at the frat. When I asked, he didn’t specify what though. It always feels like stuff at the frat is kept under wraps.
“Did you want a drink?”
“Sure.”
“Even if it’s beer?” A mischievous grin appeared on his face. Was he seriously offering me beer? I knew that alcohol wasn’t allowed in the dorms, but clearly that rule didn’t faze him. Obviously he knew how to get his hands on some drinks. To be honest, I had never drank alcohol before, but I figured this would be the easiest way to try it before I turned 21. Plus, it might alleviate the tension between us. Either that or make us fight like two drunkards in a bar.
“Sure, why not.” Nate went to get two bottles for us. I took my first sip and was disgusted by the bitter taste of the beer.
“You don’t like it? Neither did I at first,” Nate chuckled. “After a while, you get used to it.” Nate turned the TV on as we chatted. I apologized about what I said about him last time we talked, but he said it was no big deal. I felt like I was a little too harsh on him. It could just be the alcohol, but I found that I got along with him better than I did weeks ago. As we chatted, my body started to tingle. Was this how it felt like to be drunk?
“Hey, Nate. I feel kinda weird, but not like drunk weird. Is this normal, bro?” I asked. By this point, we both had two drinks each. I didn’t mind the taste of the beer the second time.
“Nah, you’re fine bro.” Nate responded, with a smile on his face. Compared to me, he appeared to be much more sober. “It happens sometimes, especially when you’re not used to it.” I figured he knew best, since he was the one drinking and partying all the time, so I ignored this foreign feeling rushing through my body. I felt as if my body was overheating as I felt my arms and legs throb and pulsate. Sweat was leaking off my armpits and down my forehead. There was part of me that knew that something was off, but it was drowned out by the alcohol. As I took another sip, I felt my arm spasm as I accidentally spilled some beer onto my shirt. Shit, I wasn’t expecting to do laundry later.
“Damn bro, you made a mess. You alright? Do you wanna change your shirt?” Nate asked. I nodded and he quickly went to his room to pick out something for me. It wasn’t the first time I had to wear his clothes. “Sorry about that, bro. First thing I found. Hope it fits you.” It was a stringer tank with Sigma Lambda Chi on it. I bet Nate looked like a walking symbol of the frat wearing that stuff. For some reason, the idea was kinda amusing to me because it seemed so over the top. I wondered how I would look dressed up like that. I’d probably look really stupid.
I stripped out of my wet shirt and changed right in front of him. I caught a whiff from my armpits, and I thought I smelled like a sweaty gym bro. The tank appeared to be a size up and it hung loosely on me. Still, it was better than nothing I guess. Despite that, it had a nice familiar smell to it though. It smelled like Nathan, but at the same time, it had a different flavor to it. He smelled a lot more manly than I remembered. I bet he wore it to the gym often.
Eventually, after my third drink, I went to go to the bathroom. My body was starting to ache, like I had just done a workout with Nate earlier. Workout…Was that what happened earlier? …I think so? Did we work out after class and come back to his place for some brewskis? For some reason, the events of today felt incredibly fuzzy to me. I was starting to forget the reason I was here in the first place.
I clumsily stumbled over my feet which looked bigger than usual. After I took a piss, I looked at myself in the mirror. Something was off, but I couldn’t put my finger on it. I didn’t always look that big, right? From a first glance, it looked like I was looking through one of those distorted mirrors they have at amusement parks. I had to have been really drunk at this point. I chuckled at the figure in front of me. At this point, I almost looked like one of those frat bros! I decided to flex my arms like they would, oblivious to the fact that they already grew just a little bit, before joining Nate on the couch.
“There you are, big man!” he said as he squeezed my muscles. I have been working out recently, I think. “I thought you passed out in there. Most guys don’t last that long for their first time, but you look good enough for another brewski.”
After downing our fourth drinks, the conversation took a different turn.
“Yo, James. I knew you said you weren’t too big on the idea of joining our frat last time we chatted, but how do you feel now, having thought things over?”
I remembered our last conversation. Honestly, I was so drunk that I didn’t remember why I turned him down in the first place. The idea that seemed unappealing to me at the time seemed like it was perfect for me at this moment. I didn’t even understand why I would be so reluctant to join. I needed to join more than anything else. I would do anything to join, even if I had to completely humiliate myself in front of my fellow bros. At this point, nothing was too extreme for me. The fact that Nate was in it was enough reason to join, so we could hang out more like we used to. Plus, I could get to hang out with all my other bros and drink and party whenever we want.
“I’ve given it some thought, and yeah bro, I’ll join,” my voice slurred as my mouth moved before my mind could. I had committed at this point. No backing out now. I’m a member of Sigma Lambda Chi for life.
“Sweet, bro!” He grabbed me on my far shoulder and pulled me close. “I’m glad you said yes, because I have a surprise for you. Close your eyes, bro.”
I closed my eyes as Nate went into his room to grab something. Did I actually agree to join his frat? I’m not sure what’s going on with me today. When he came back, I felt Nate press on my head as his “surprise” fit tight around it. “You can open them now.”
I realized I was wearing the same hat that Nate always wore, with his frat’s letters printed on it. “We’re gonna be matching now, bro. Isn’t that awesome? I know you’re gonna want to wear it whenever and wherever. But you’re wearing it wrong. Let me fix it for you, dude.” He turned the brim around so it faced my back. As my hat turned backwards, I felt my mind fog up and any tension or brain activity screech to a halt. I was unable to realize what I signed myself up for, unable to protest. My conscious mind was drowned out by the alcohol and this hat was like a lock, sealing it away. Not that I was against this, as a wave of pleasure surged through me. I felt my mind slow down, almost as if it was stuck in molasses, as my thoughts began to simplify. It felt good though...
I would follow the example of my fellow brothers. Look like them, think like them, act like them. Almost like a hivemind of bros, you know, bro? By this point, the changes were irreversible. Nate had turned me into another frat bro just like him.
“Everything worked out as planned, bro. You see, when you, my own best bro, told me you didn’t want to join the frat with me, I was actually really hurt. So I talked to Brett, and had him “work his magic”, to help me do to you what he did to me. I don’t like to lie to you, but it’s a frat secret, so now you get to know bro. Like I said, it’s a secret, so don’t talk about this with anyone.”
“Don’t worry about it bro. It’s all…uh…
Fuck dude, what’s the word…water under the bridge? Huhuhu…” I really had to think about that one. I found it harder to articulate and use complex words, as I mainly just spoke in bro-speak. To be honest, I wasn’t really that upset that he lied to me. He did what he had to as a member of the frat. I never stayed mad at one of my bros for very long.
“Now we get to be brothers for life,” he said as he gave me a big bro hug. We clung to each other like two giant masses of muscle. My huge biceps wrapped around his firm back as his did for me. Afterwards, he handed me my fifth drink and we cheered to me joining Sigma Lambda Chi. He laid down all of the rules, what everything was like, telling me about the coolest guys there, and so on. He said he’d bring me to the frat house and introduce me to everyone tomorrow. “They’re gonna love you for sure, bro. I’ve got an eye for cool bros like you.”
As it got later, and we moved on to drink numero 6, I felt myself get very tired as we both passed out on his couch. I woke up a couple hours later, and I looked out the window to see a pitch black sky. Shit, it was almost 10 PM and I had to turn in my assignment at midnight. But for some reason, I didn’t really care right now. I didn’t mind turning in assignments late as long as the teacher still gave me credit. I felt no different from the way I was a couple hours ago, just another Sigma Lambda Chi frat bro, but I liked it. It felt right to me. It was where I, no, where we belonged.
I looked down. Nate’s tank hung tightly to me now. It took me a second to notice my arms…Holy shit, they were fucking huge! I looked awesome, bro. As I admired my new body, Nate was still asleep, his hand on my meaty thigh. Just above that, my dick throbbed through my pants. Fuck, I was so horny for some reason. Eventually, Nate slowly regained consciousness.
“I usually don’t drink this much on a school day,” Nate said, still a little hungover as he rubbed his eyes. We sat in silence for about a minute before he spoke again. “By the way, there was another reason I invited you over. There’s something that’s been on my chest for a while.”
“Go ahead, bro. I can take it,” I responded confidently. My voice sounded deeper and more bro-like than usual, just like him.
“Here goes, dude. I think I like you, bro. Not like you, but I think I like like you. I know it’s hella gay, but I couldn’t stand to see you be so cold to me. That’s why I had to make you a bro like me. I’m sure you’ll love it here, bro. And hey, if you’re not gay, that’s cool. We can forget this shit ever happened and go back to being bros for life.”
At first, I honestly thought I was still dreaming. First, he turned me into a frat boy, and now, he was confessing his feelings to me? How crazier could this night get? For all my life, I thought he was straight. I remembered being glad when he broke up with his girlfriend two years back. I couldn’t stand her. When he joined Sigma Lambda Chi, I assumed he was 100% straight and that he was banging some sorority chicks every night. To think he felt the same way I did all this time.
“Bro, I like you too. When you stopped talking to me, I started to get kinda jealous. I didn’t want to accept you for who you are. But being your bro just isn’t enough for me, bro.” I leaned in for a kiss, my inhibitions still nowhere to be found. It was my first kiss and it was with the person I cherished most. I felt like I was in heaven. I didn’t really care that I was a dumb frat bro like him anymore. I never did. That shit was stupid anyways. But now, Nate fixed our friendship and made us closer than ever. I loved the taste of his lips against mine and I didn’t want it to end but eventually Nate parted our lips.
“Wanna fuck me, bro?” he whispered in my ear. A flirtatious smirk was plastered on his face, and one of his hands was still wrapped around my neck. This was real. I nodded as he took me to his bed. I had never done this before, but I’ve seen plenty of porn, so I knew what to expect. He laid down on his back and stripped naked. I never felt this aroused before. My dick even looked bigger than it used to be. I was so pent up that I felt like I was holding this load in for months. I guess frat bros really are as horny as they say. I lubed up my larger cock before sticking it into Nate’s hole.
My serpent stretched out his tight hole as he had clearly not seen much action down there until now. I pounded his ass as my dick went in and out of him. In and out, in and out, in and out…It was a steady rhythm, my dick was like a metronome. My hands clung to him as I held him in place, pinning him to his bed. My hands ran all over his shoulders, broad and muscular, built like a football player’s. We both felt absolutely euphoric as our deep, masculine moans filled the room. The moans were loud enough that the students on the other side of the wall could easily hear them, but I didn’t care about any noise complaints as I fucked him harder and harder. After half an hour of fucking, he both hit our orgasm at almost exactly the same time. I ejaculated inside his tight hole, my hot, sticky seed flooding his insides as Nate came all over his abs. At this point I was exhausted and still hungover and I basically fell on top of him on his bed. We were both panting and out of breath.
“I knew you were a good fucker, bro.” he whispered seductively as he kissed me. We stayed in that position for several minutes until we heard the door open.
“Yo, Nate! Did you do it? How did it go?” a voice asked, shouting loudly from the other room. I recognized the voice as Brett’s. He peeked into the room, witnessing the two of us cuddling together naked. To be honest, I thought he would’ve been grossed out. Guess I had the wrong idea about him.
“Better than expected, dude,” Nate responded. He didn’t seem to care that we were both naked in front of his roommate and that we just got back from our trip to Pound Town.
“He looks way better this way, don’t you agree, bro? But man, dude, now I know why you wanted him to be a pledge so bad. I was wondering why you wouldn’t fuck any of those sexy sorority babes. More for me, I guess.”
A week passed and by then, I joined the frat officially. Me and Nate started dating shortly after, but none of our bros minded. It didn’t matter if we were gay, we were still brothers. I also learned how Nate met Brett. He was taking a tour of the campus over the summer and he ran into Brett who was recruiting people for the frat. Brett took a liking to him and kinda took him under his wing like some sort of mentor and they started hanging out since he only lived a town away from us. Brett was our age, but he had more seniority and authority because his older brother Brad was very popular within the frat. Turns out Brett and some of the upperclassmen knew how to turn guys into the ideal bros for their frat. They wanted to bolster their numbers to make Sigma Lambda Chi the biggest and coolest frat in the state, with the biggest bros and the biggest parties, and naturally both me and Nate were chosen. Not that either of us minded. Nate joined the football team with Brett and some other guys in the frat, and the rest of us would go watch them play every game. Our section of the stadium was always the loudest and rowdiest, especially when one of our bros scored a touchdown.
Apparently I grew a ton during the night that I was with Nate, but I was too drunk to notice just how massive I had become. It must’ve been something in the beer, huhu. I started working out with Nate and Brett, and sometimes some other bros too. I even ended up changing my major. I chose business because my bros said that it was the easiest shit ever and I wasn’t feeling psychology anymore. I didn’t really feel like thinking much anymore and I found that focusing on education so much was a chore and that I was wasting my college experience. I’d rather be partying and drinking or hanging out with the bros at the frat house, watching sports, playing video games, or playing ball outside. I got to see why Nate grew to enjoy this lifestyle so much, and I was mad at myself for not seeing his point of view sooner.
Three years later, me and Nate are still dating and we’re set to graduate this semester. We’re thinking about getting a place in the city not too far from campus, probably with Brett and another friend of ours to save money on rent. We’ll probably still throw parties every weekend like we used to. College was such a memorable experience and I wish I could live it again. I only have Nate, Brett, and all my other bros to thank for making college awesome for me.
#jock#jock bro#jock tf#jock transformation#jockification#male hypnosis#male tf#male transformation#mental change#muscle tf#dumbing down#dumb jock#dumber#frat bro#frat#frat boy#muscle transformation#muscle#mental changes#nerd to jock#gay tf#gay jock#transformation#reprogramming#dumbification#college jock#personality change
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Opposites Attract
Part 1
Azriel x reader
summary: you’re messy and unorganized, love staying up late and sleeping in in the morning, so what’s going to happen when you’re forced to work with the shadowsinger, the most disciplined person you’ve ever met?
warnings: none!
a/n: this is the most I’ve written in a while but I’m liking how this is turning out. I feel like this could’ve been one part but I don’t really wanna write a 10k word fic so I’ve decided this is gonna be a series. hope you enjoy <3
~●○°●○°●○~
Azriel, by your viewpoint, had always only been the Spymaster, the epitome of propriety, with an excellent work ethic and an affinity for discipline. For that reason, you felt like you’d never get along with him.
You were messy, unorganized and a little clumsy on occasion. This always led to some interesting stories later on and a lot of teasing from the rest of your family. You pretended to be annoyed at them, rolling your eyes at their snide comments and making fun of their flaws in return, but secretly you loved when they let loose.
Azriel, however, never joined in on this teasing, despite the two of you having known each other for well over a decade. You assumed that it was your lack of discipline that irked him and so he chose to stay away but the High Lord didn't consider this before meddling.
it was a Sunday morning when, in your half-dazed state, you made your way to the kitchen for a cup of coffee.
"Y/n," Rhysand called from behind you.
You groaned in response, not bothering to turn around to face him. It was way too early to be seeing people.
He stayed quiet for a couple of seconds, no doubt waiting for a more proper acknowledgement of the High Lord of the Night Court. When he realized he wasn’t going to get it, he huffed and proceeded with what he needed to say.
"I need some reports filed quickly so from tomorrow you're gonna be working with Azriel to get them to me by the end of the month," Rhysand stated.
Your eyes widened, now feeling more awake than the strongest coffee had made you in the morning. You whipped your head around to face the smirking High Lord, knowing fully well this wasn't an urgent task but a way for Rhysand and Feyre to intervene in your love life. The inner circle loved to joke that because you and Azriel were opposites of each other, you’d get along great. It was all fun and games until Feyre got obsessed with the idea of actually giving you and Azriel a try regardless of whether you and Azriel wanted to or not.
“Can’t someone else do it?” You asked. “Why does it have to be me?”
“Because everyone else is busy doing their work. Besides, Azriel will be a good influence on you. Maybe he can teach you some discipline.” That smirk was still on his face and you’ve never wished more for Feyre’s abilities to make animals out of water. You’d love to leave a bear on Rhysand right about now, but unfortunately, he was your High Lord and his wish is your command, so you settled for the next best thing.
“Your shirt is covered in lint,” you side-eyed and walked out with your coffee cup in hand, leaving a gaping Rhysand swatting at his clothes.
At least you still had the day to prepare yourself for tomorrow.
After training, you were in your room having just come out of the shower. Someone knocked on your door and you had a feeling you knew who it was but strongly hoped against it. You made your way to the door and right before you could open it, your foot caught in a shirt on the ground and you fell with a loud thud.
Grimacing, you stood up, rubbing your elbow where it hit the floor. Opening the door, you saw Azriel standing on the other side with a smirk, no doubt because of your fall. Gods you couldn’t even open the door without being clumsy. Meanwhile, Azriel stood his back straight, shoulders pulled back, wings neatly folded and hands behind his back. He looked like the definition of grace.
You truly were opposites.
“Y/n,” he nodded in greeting, ignoring the knowledge of your fall to save you from further embarrassment.
You smiled slightly in return.
“I’ve been informed that we’re working on the reports together till the end of the month,” he stated.
“That’s correct,” you confirmed.
He nodded. “Meet me in my study tomorrow morning at 8,” Azriel said and walked away.
You stood startled for a second before calling after him, “Eight in the morning? Are you serious?”
Azriel turned around with a confused expression. “Yes.”
“Who starts work at 8 in the morning?” You questioned in disbelief.
“I normally start work at 6 but for you, I’m starting late. I’ll see you tomorrow.” He gave a final nod of farewell before turning around and walking away.
You gaped, internally cursing Rhysand for putting you in this situation. For a person like you who preferred to spend nights awake reading, eight in the morning was like the middle of the night. You didn’t know how you’d survive like this until the month's end. Groaning, you shut the door and slumped face-first into bed.
Cauldron have mercy.
~●○°●○°●○~
The next morning came around sooner than you were ready for. You’d set an alarm for 6 so you’d have ample time to wake up, enjoy your morning coffee, take a shower, and be ready for a day of torture. However, when 6 A.M. rolled around, getting trampled by a horse in your sleep sounded better than waking up, so you snoozed your alarm and fell back asleep.
When Mor burst into your room, you woke with a start.
“Good morning, princess!” she yelled, walking in wearing her night clothes still but looking as if she was ready for a night out at Rita’s.
“What time is it?” you gasped, frantically reaching for the clock at your bedside.
Mor jumped onto your bed. “What's up?”
8:02 A.M.
“Fuck!” you screamed, jumping out of bed and running to the bathroom. “I'm late!”
You shut the bathroom door, rushing about your morning routine, brushing your teeth, then hair, and slapping on some moisturizer.
“Relax! He lives in the same house!” Mor shouted from your bedroom.
You rushed out of the bathroom, reaching for the pair of shorts on the floor. “Yes, but we live in very different worlds,” you replied, slipping on the shorts and looking around for a shirt.
Mor lay on your bed, head propped up on one arm, and looked at you with an amused expression.
You threw on a random shirt you found in the closet and started to tie your hair into a messy bun. Mor took in your look and frowned. “Are we sure that top works with those shorts?” she asked.
You looked at her incredulously. “I don’t care about that right now!” you exclaimed. “Where are my shoes?” you went on your knees to look under the bed and pulled out a pair of white shoes you’d kicked under there last night. You glanced at the clock while putting on shoes and cursed under your breath.
“Girl, you know he’s not going to eat you alive if you’re 20 minutes late right?” Mor asked.
“No, but with the amount of lecturing I'm about to get, he might as well,” you sighed, getting off the bed and finally heading out the door.
“Good luck!” Mor called behind you as you headed to the door.
“Thanks,” you replied and rushed outside.
~●○°●○°●○~
Azriel’s study door was ajar so you peeked your head in to make sure he was there.
Azriel was sitting in his chair, head down, looking over some paperwork when you walked in.
“Good morning,” you greeted, going to sit in the chair opposite his. “I’m sorry I’m late.”
Azriel looked at the clock then at you, and said, “You’re earlier than any of us expected, actually.”
You were taken aback slightly by the statement. “Us?” you asked.
“Rhysand, Cassian and I,” he replied. “In fact, you just cost me quite a bit by being only twenty minutes late.”
Now you were straight-up offended. “You three bet that I’d slack off?”
You felt rage towards Cassian and Rhysand for thinking so little of you, but you decided to deal with them later. For now, you were stuck with Azriel for a good eight hours, and those were not going to be easy if you were upset with him the whole time. So, you shook his words off and put on a smile.
“So what are we doing?” you asked.
#azriel fanfic#azriel x reader#acotar#acotar fanfiction#acotar fluff#azriel x female!reader#azriel x you#azriel imagine#azriel shadowsinger#azriel shadowsinger x reader
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Argumentative?
Pairings: Rafe Cameron X F! Reader
Warnings: Soft Rafe (It’s a warning of it’s own), angst, alcohol mention
Author’s Note: I’m so on the fence with Rafe cos like he’s obvs a horrible character, but like he’s such a good character. Like he’s sexy and he’s well-written, I love him. But he’s an arsehole, I hate him. yknow
Summary: You and Rafe never argue, ever.
Despite Rafe’s hard demeanour, and tendency to need the final word at all times, very seldom did you argue in your relationship. For someone living with so much hatred, it was important to Rafe that you never experienced it.
Typically, you got on well. Similar in interest but completely different in manner. He was the talker, you were the listener. You washed the dishes, he put them away. You simply never fought.
Bickering was different, you’d laugh and joke around, poke holes at a bad haircut and so forth. And naturally, with Rafe, jealousy was a large part of your day-to-day life together, but the anger that came was never directed at you. He knew how un-wandering your eyes were, and he knew how beautiful other people found you. Yes, he’d lose his temper at the Pogue looking you up and down, but no, he would never blame you for it. He knew that you were his.
On the other hand, you were never entirely sure that he was yours. He’d never once cheated, or given you any reason to think that he was, but you were aware of his past when your first met. Aware of the elusive Rafe Cameron who was never tied down for long. Self-consciousness crept in quickly after you’d hit the one-year mark.
A trip to the mainland that you’d chosen to accompany your boyfriend on. Simply a few drinks with some potential clients, Rafe was expected to go following his new position in the family company. The insecurity began when he hadn’t initially invited you, it stayed as you realised how many beautiful women were there - each with eyes on Cameron Development’s newest CEO.
You tried to loop your arm in his, an effort to have the eyes turn away, but Rafe didn’t notice. His hands still tightly in his trouser pocket, networking away. Neither he, or the leggy brunette in front of him noticed as you slipped from his side and found the open bar.
10 Minutes and 3 miscellaneous drinks later, he found you. Tucked away and sipping your straw.
“Hey,” he soothes, “Where ya been?”
You look to him, “Here.” you state, plain and simple.
“Obviously,” He tries to jest, “Why did you leave me?”
“I came for a drink.”
“Why didn’t you come back?”
“Why are you suddenly so interested?”
I must reinstate that you never fought, so anything more than some hushed words, or a light squabble, seriously neared separate bed territory. What might have been a heated conversation to some couples, was a raging bullfight to the pair of you. Rafe had so much of that for the rest of his life. He was adamant that it would never happen with you.
“Let's go outside.” He states; much less a suggestion than a direction, and leads you out a back door to one of Charleston’s quiet alleyways.
“Talk,” he ordered, hands on each of your arms.
You shrug, “I’ve nothing to say.”
Rafe kisses his teeth, looking away, “Have I done something?” He asks, a hint of insecurity in his tone.
You can’t quite answer, because truthfully he hadn’t. He’d never given you a reason to feel insecure, you just did anyway. Something about knowing that you were never invited, knowing that if you hadn’t decided you’d come along, he’d probably be off with some other woman.
“I shouldn’t have come,” you finally admit, “I should have just let you get on with it like you normally do. Stayed blissfully unaware.”
His eyes squint, “Y/N, I want you here. I have nothing to hide from you?’
You chuckle, it’s hearty but without an ounce of humour to it. “What? Do you think I’m blind or something?” Rafe stands unmoving, taking in your words, “I see you in there, they eat you up, and you feed into it!”
“How do I feed into it?” He’s strangely calm, anger in his tone, but only a whisper of it.
“You flirt! You smile, you complement, you completely ignore that I’m right next to you. Rafe, you don’t even introduce me as your girlfriend-”
“Because I thought it was obvious!”
“It’s not!” You shout, “It’s fucking not.”
The alleyway is quiet again. Muffled voices and music come from inside the door, and a handful of cars driving down the main road a few meters away provide the only light. You see Rafe’s face for a second as they pass by.
“How can other people see that I’m your girlfriend, when I don’t even feel like I am.”
His hands drop to his sides as he inhales shakily. Not a word is spoken, but tears fall from your eyes. Rafe watches them glide, mouth slightly agape. He stands a second more before pulling you into his embrace.
You’d try to fight it, but that’s the last thing you want to do right now.
“I’m sorry,” Rafe whispers, lips grazing your forehead, “I’m so sorry, Baby”
You want to assure him it’s fine, but it’s not. You were dancing on the grounds of breakup territory, and neither of you wanted that.
“I notice things, Rafe. And you forget that I know your history, I knew who you were before.”
“I’m not him anymore.”
You hesitate your answer, “I know that-”
“Do you?” He asks, pulling away to see your face. His eyes are growing red, obviously fighting back the urge to cry with you, “Because it sounds like you don’t. And I’m not that guy any more, I want you.”
“Do you?”
His words used back on him. Normally he’d continue this argument, fight his way through to victory. Finish the battle with the last word, and full disregard to the other person’s feelings. But, he couldn’t this time. He could never fight with you.
“More than anything.”
Tears fall from his eyes, water staining the silk shirt he wears under his blazer. He doesn’t care, eyes boring into yours, awaiting your words.
"Okay."
#applcrumbl#writing#rafe cameron#rafe cameron x reader#rafe cameron fluff#rafe cameron smut#rafe cameron angst#outer banks#drew starkey
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I Saw Wish
And it was the worst animated Disney movie I’ve ever seen. I have to watch it again before I can get into the nitty gritty details. But I don’t need details to sum it up, because my dad actually said it perfectly as we left the theater:
“It was like someone who didn’t really understand Disney movies tried to make a Disney movie.”
Both the form (the technical arts of filmmaking) and the content (the morals, values, and themes of the movie) were totally horrible.
I don’t know who’s fault it was. Jeremy Spears was in the storyboard room and Mark Henn and Eric Goldberg did some 2D animation. But they must have gotten outvoted, or they must not care anymore.
Because holy cow. Here’s some stuff that’s just off the top of my head.
SPOILERS. Not that it matters, because nothing interesting happens in this movie.
The writing? Terrible. Ninety percent of it feels like the characters are filling time with quirky one-liners that are trying too hard to be appealing, then failing, then taking you out of the movie. The jokes aren’t funny. The characters just respond to each other in conversation to check a one-liner box. The other twenty percent is whole conversations repeating tell-don’t-show exposition that has already been covered, usually twice, in previous scenes. Like if in Tangled, every scene had included some variation of Rapunzel saying to friends and enemies alike, “I have to see the floating lights so I’m sneaking to the castle with this thief who wants a mysterious tiara I hid from him. Don’t tell my mother, she’s a bit overprotective!” Over. And over. And over.
The character motivations are way too broad. Asha? Her dream is just “that everybody around me gets to be happy.” That’s it, in a nutshell. No deeper exploration of that. Nobody asks, “why do you care so much?” Nobody tries to convince her she should look out for herself, and then she proves she was right all along. The King? We are told (not shown) that he doesn’t want anyone else’s dreams to be “destroyed.” But he in no believable way expresses that that motivation is still what’s driving him during the movie—what’s driving him is just a plain old lust for power, no nuance.
By the way, the whole premise of the movie? Undercooked. Half-baked concepts strung together with no definitive meaning. Therefore, it’s not believable. Example: The characters act like the wishes are beautiful—well, actually, no, this movie doesn’t know how to show, so there’s not a lot of meaningful acting—the characters just tell us that wishes are “the most beautiful part of someone,” and that’s why it’s worth going through this adventure to give their wishes back to them. But there’s no proof of that in the movie. In fact, it directly kicks it’s own legs out from under that idea, because it has every character who gives up their wish forget that part of themselves. Asha’s grandfather has forgotten his wish, but that doesn’t make him any less “beautiful.” She, and everyone, still treats him like he’s this wonderful old man who deserves the world, who everyone loves…but why is he so appealing? If he “gave up the most beautiful part of him?” The only character who is changed by their lack-of-wish is the Sleepy-analogue character…who is just sleepy, which is described as “boring.” But nobody else who’s given up their wish in the whole kingdom acts like that. It’s just him. Also, the King acts like it’s so important to protect the wishes from destruction. But what does destroying a wish look like? That actually happens to Asha’s mom. Her wish-bubble is broken, literally, and she just says she feels grief. But like. Why? She never remembered it in the first place; it had been missing from her life for years. Also, what the heck is a wish?! It seems to range from broad concepts like “inspire people” to “fly.” Just “fly,” like a bird. The desire to levitate off the ground is the most important, beautiful essence of one background character. Like, what?! But no character ever has the why behind their wish to make us care.
I could go on and on about that point. Like, think about Disney movies that wrote the book on how to make movies about characters with wishes. If Ariel were in Wish, her bubble would look like “dancing and learning and exploring on the Surface with someone who understands her.” But we believe that that is her real, genuine wish, and that it matters to her, because we are shown why being understood is so important to her. Because it’s missing from her life. There’s a scene where she explores a boat alone, and even her best friend doesn’t get excited about it with her. Her dad won’t listen to her point of view. Her siblings don’t ask her about her life even when they think she’s in love. She wants what she wants because of pieces of her life that we are shown.
We are never shown why Asha’s grandfather is obsessed with inspiring people, so we have no reason to believe it, or care whether he gets it or not. We can’t feel disappointed when his wish is said to “never come true,” like we did when Quasimodo was abused by the people he wished to join. We can’t feel elated when he finally “gets” his wish, like we did when Simba smiles on Pride Rock remembering the same way he used to as a cub and claims the crown with a roar. We don’t have anything to hang on to, nothing to relate to, nothing to grasp and feel with the characters. So we don’t feel, because they didn’t put the work in to help us feel. They just say, “the mom’s feeling grief. Feel grief.” And expect us to do the work ourselves. I have to stop harping on this point and move on.
But The main point of the movie is very broad because of that lazy premise, and it’s barely reinforced by any kind of appealing storytelling. If I had to guess, the point would be “Keep wishing for more even when it’s hard.” But the story they told to communicate that meaning was so unimpactful. Asha doesn’t have a dream of her own that’s such hard work to accomplish! (Neither does her grandfather; his wish is “to inspire people.” And at the end, we’re supposed to see him strumming a guitar and believe it’s inspiring? We were never shown how he worked hard to learn how to play the instrument. Or that he carved it with his own hands, or anything like that. So there’s no meaningful demonstration of working hard for it or achieving your wish even if it’s far out of reach.) And nobody except the king is trying to take wishes away from anyone, and he just does it literally, after they voluntarily give them to him, so there’s not even any impactful demonstration of “don’t let anyone tell you your wishes are dumb or unachievable, or stop you from reaching them.” Even when he takes them away, it’s just because they…could, someday, be used to threaten his kingdom in a vague, really unlikely way. There are so many things you could do with “keep wishing for more even when it’s hard.” For instance; you could say the main character has always been afraid to dream (wish for more), because maybe when she was a kid something wonderful almost happened but ended in tragedy, so she keeps her head down and doesn’t want much because if you don’t dream you’ll never be disappointed. She takes no risks, and has to learn that sometimes trying and failing is worth more than slogging through life all self-protective. I mean, the pieces were right there. She has this line about her dad, and how she wished he would get better but then he died. She has lines about how nobody should have to live with grief?? Then that’s never addressed again! It’s just a throwaway emotion-moment with no buildup or follow-through to tie it to and support that main theme.
The compositions of too many shots were so terrible. Characters got cut off in weird places. One shot has Asha dead center, with her grandfather on the left side of the table and her mother on the right, having a family dinner with a super exposition-heavy conversation that is meant to be emotionally charged. But despite everything else being perfectly centered, half of her mother’s body is chopped off. The movie’s shot like someone’s mom who doesn’t understand technology tried to take a video with her phone.
The charm of the art “style” wears off basically immediately. I know what they were going for. I see the sketch lines and watercolor textures. This is maybe the first time Disney ever failed to accomplish a visual “look” that turned out good. Everything looks dull. Muted. De-saturated. Slightly out of focus, but not in a cool Spider-Verse way. The sets or backgrounds are lazy; at no point does the scenery look complete; big, empty, boring spaces that do not create any kind of “stage” for impactful moments. The rendering looks unfinished. When Asha’s hair moves during her belting of the “I Make This Wish” song, it’s bad. It’s unnatural. It flops in a way that doesn’t make sense for the weight of her hair. The most impactful visual moments come from the villain, and they’re moments when he looks way too unhinged for the kind of line he’s saying.
There is no interesting character development. Asha goes from believing everyone is basically good and their wishes deserve the chance to come true , to….that, again. That would be fine, she could be a static character, if she proved contrast-characters wrong, in a believable way. But she never does. Because no other characters argue with her except the King. And it goes no deeper than “everyone’s wishes are basically good and they deserve the chance to make them true” vs. “nuh-uh, because I get to decide what makes them deserving.” The King doesn’t have any kind of interesting development, either. They don’t expand on his tragic backstory—it consists of one drawing of him near a broken boat, and a few images of the corner burned off of his family taoestry. They never say “King Magnifico wished for _____ and it was taken away!” They literally never tell you what his wish or dreams were, or what motivated him to create the whole kingdom that the movie’s premise sits on. So there’s no convincing sense of progression, how he got this way, why he’ll keep going “so far.”
The pacing is weird. It undercuts every moment that could have any kind of emotion behind it. One minute Valentino is suavely bouncing around, then he’s given a two-second beat to blubber with badly-animated tears that he’ll miss Star—then he instantly gets to have another funny one-liner so we forget he might’ve been sad a second ago. We’re clearly supposed to believe that the King and his wife are devoted to each other, and his turning evil was such a big betrayal, but there’s no time and no impactful evidence for us to believe either of those things. And even if we did, the moment he’s defeated and trapped in a mirror, and begs to be let free, the Queen kind of shrugs it off, makes a forgettable one-liner, and tells them to throw him in the dungeon. And he doesn’t look remorseful. And we don’t even get to assume he’s embarrassed or emotionally devastated that he’s come to this—because the last thing he says is “nooo, the dungeon is so smellyyy!” Like this is a half-baked LEGO short that can’t get emotionally deeper than what an actual 3 year-old’s parents might be okay with.
And that’s the worst offense: The movie is not genuine. It works hard for nothing, and it has no vulnerability. It just uses old Disney standbys to pretend to be vulnerable. Have the music swell and the characters gasp and the songs drip emotion when characters are meant to be saying or doing something emotional.
But truthfully, think of all the Disney movies you’ve ever seen with the hardest emotional moments. The sheer joy of Genie when he realizes he’s free. The anguish when Elsa thinks Anna’s been frozen forever, or when Anna thinks she’s dead. The trauma when Simba loses Mufasa. The longing and dreaming of Ariel when she reaches up out of her grotto. The sense of foreboding when Mother Gothel says “fine, now I’m the bad guy” or the heartbreak in Rapunzel’s eyes when she thinks Flynn has abandoned her, or the shame on Aladdin’s face when Jafar reveals he’s a street-rat, or the horror of cruelty when the stepsisters rip up Cinderella’s dress, or Kala’s tears when Tarzan leaves her in the treehouse, or Sarabi’s tears when Simba comes back, or Mulan’s father tossing aside the sword and token of the Emperor to embrace Mulan, or heck, even just Lilo pushing Stitch in the woods and telling him “get out of here.” This movie has no moments like that. It has moments you can tell that the filmmakers wanted to hit like that—but they don’t.
Because no work is put into building them up. You know how much Simba loves Mufasa, because you’ve been watching their chemistry more than any other character all the way up till he dies. You know how much Mulan wants to please her family because she spends all of Act I desperately attempting to do that. You know Quasimodo believes the world below is beautiful and wants them to accept him because he has interesting things like—talking to gargoyles, convincing us that he’s lonely; building a scale model of the townspeople, convincing us that he sees them in a beautiful way and wishes he were beautiful in more ways than one like them, too.
Right down to the facial expressions, none of them are as anguished, happy, sad, excited, silly, in any convincing way like all of Disney’s other movies. Asha’s “low moment” when she’s afraid her “wish” hurt everyone else (still vague on what that wish ever was) lasts two seconds, she’s not crying, she’s barely sitting with slumped shoulders, and her family barely spend two seconds comforting her. They basically just say, “aw, no, it’s not y fault, it’s the king’s.” And she’s like, “yeah okay” and that’s that. It’s like the animators we’re afraid to animate really intimate emotions on the characters’ faces. The voice actors, too.
And the whole movie is peppered with Easter eggs to past Disney movies. But all that does, if you really know Disney beyond the visuals, is make you think of how hollow this movie is in comparison. How much you wish you were watching Cinderella or The Little Mermaid or something with depth and vulnerability instead of Wish.
#I’ll talk more in an organized fashion later#wish#disney’s wish#wish Disney#wish 2023#critique#spoilers
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SEVEN ROYALTIES
“once upon a time there was a prince, who did anything he could to be with the love of his life” — park sunghoon.
park sunghoon x fem!reader genre: childhood friends to enemies to lovers , one sided love somewhere into the story , heavy angst , fluff ! warnings: character’s death (not a main character) , curse words. (lmk if i missed something pls!) || NOT FULLY PROOFREAD!!
WORD-COUNT ; 5.5K+
NOTE. wow i dont even know where to start! it’s been a real while! i think like more than a month, i’m extremely sorry for being gone, school is so stressful, but i got some time to write now and honestly? i missed it so much!! hopefully you’d like this part and don’t let it fool you, just because i’ve been gone for a while doesn’t mean i’m not continuing this wonderful series!! it was also supposed to be enemies to lovers but i honestly failed miserably and idk how to define it- some mentions of sunoo’s story are dropped here too :)
“why do you always look at me like that?”
“like what?”
“like i’m the most precious thing you’ve ever saw”
a few years into your childhood and you were already been told that you’re going to marry off to someone as soon as possible.
you, being the second princess and the least favorite one, had to deal with a lot of struggles through your childhood.
everyone loved your older sister more, praised her, cherished her, spoiled her, gave her whatever she wants.
you, on the other hand, had to work hard in terms of getting what you wanted.
you always looked up to your older sister, you can’t lie, you definitely understand why she’s getting all the attention to herself without even trying.
your mom is your favorite person, she’s actually your best friend.
some kids have hard time deciding what to answer when they’re being asked who’s their favorite parent, but you definitely know the answer already.
it’s your dad that never bats an eye to you, your mom however always tries to maintain her attention to both you and your sister. you’d do anything for your mom.
as much as you’re happy that you’re at least not a second option in your mom’s perspective, the king is the one who’s more dominant.
you’ve always tried to get your father’s attention, even for a mere second, but he always pushed you away, making you feel unworthy and sad.
at age six, you were forced to go with your mom to one of her friend’s kingdom, your neighbor kingdom.
everyone in royalty knows about the good friendship your kingdoms have, and they’re all surprised it still keeps on going.
royalty comes with a dangerous risk, people will always look at anything you do, and will not hesitate to attack if you happened to do something they’re not a fond of.
your kingdom suffered lots of wars, but won almost all of them.
at the very same day you were forced to go with your mom, you also met the person who finally had all their attention on you, the person who you could rely on no matter when.
“i’m y/n!” you extended your hand out with a smile.
“i’m sunghoon” he whispered and you tilt your head. he wasn’t shaking your hand and you couldn’t even hear him.
“what?”
“i’m sunghoon”
“i cant hear you!!” you shout and put your ear really close to his mouth.
“i’m sunghoon!” he shouted into your ear and you fell down while holding your ear.
“you did that on purpose didn’t you!” you pout and he laughed.
that’s when you realized his cute smile and the little dimples that grew on his cheeks.
he was cute, a cute and shy prince, you could get along perfectly with him.
and you actually did. you spent the rest of your visit just roaming around their castle.
he introduced you his six brothers, they were all very nice and funny, but only sunghoon interested you.
he told you about his interests and you told him about yours.
“i want to learn how to skate!” he said and you noticed his eyes growing in excitement while talking about it.
“it sounds really interesting!” you smiled and cheered him.
“what about you?”
“i actually don’t know” you sighed, “i want my father to pay more attention to me”
“who needs your father when you have me? i’ll be always here for you” he smiled.
“really?” you asked and he nodded, “really”
“promise me!” you held out your pinky and he locked his with yours, “i think promises are stupid, but only for you i promise to never leave you side”
“why are they stupid?”
“because sometimes you regret them, or even forget them, and you cant keep them forever”
growing up with sunghoon was something you could never explain.
having to suffer your father’s comparisons between you and your sister was something, but having to see sunghoon going through puberty was something else. scarier indeed.
the both of you were inseparable, to the point where your parents even started talking about marriage between the two of you when you were twelve.
every now and then in your teenage years, you’d come around his castle, your second home.
whenever you were pissed off with your father or just wanted some quiet, you’d find yourself going back to sunghoon, only he knew how to make you feel ten times better.
“what are you reading?” he asked you.
you were laying your head on his lap as he sat under a tree, it was a peaceful day and you wanted to enjoy some time with him.
“just some fairytale stories” you put your book on your stomach and looked at him who was already looking down at you.
“wishing it was you?” he teased.
you rolled your eyes and smacked the book on his head, “fairytales are the best!”
you returned to read the book while he kept staring at you.
“read for me” he asked and you looked at him, sharing an eye contact.
“hey”
“hm?”
“why do you always look at me like that?”
“like what?”
“like i’m the most precious thing you’ve ever saw”
sunghoon coughed a bit and looked away, “just start reading please, im interested”
“the princess then took the prince’s hand and held it tightly, slowly closing the gap between them and leaning in for a kiss—“
“never mind! i’ll just go sleep” sunghoon threw you off him and laid down next to you.
“you could’ve done that nicely!” you scoffed and he laughed.
he can’t explain it, but something about you makes him feel warm and comfortable. he loves your company more than anything else in this world and there’s nothing he loves more than staring at your gorgeous face.
spending a few years together made him long for you more and more every day that he’s not next to you.
he fell in love with you, and he fell hard.
you weren’t better either, every day without sunghoon for you felt like eternity.
he’s the only person you can see your future with, the only person who loves you for who you are and the only person that has his full attention on you.
you trust him more than you trust yourself and you family members.
on royal events, you’d be acting like a married couple, shooing away the singles royals that wants to catch you.
you belong to sunghoon and sunghoon belongs to you.
“it’s nice to meet you prince sunghoon” one filthy princess introduced herself to sunghoon while you stood by his side, holding his arm.
“likewise, meet my wife, y/n” he said, clearly uninterested in the princess but as soon as he looked over his side and met your eyes a smile formed on his face.
the princess scoffed and went away, finally letting you and sunghoon laugh it off.
“did you see the way she looked at you when you said you have a wife?” you held a hand over your chest, out of breath because of the amount of air you let out.
“please, it was so funny i’ll remember it for long” he nodded and you continued making jokes about everyone around you.
you shared your first kiss with sunghoon when you were fifteen.
“i love cherry blossoms” you said as you walked together with sunghoon under the cherry blossoms.
it was one of your favorite things to do with him, walking through the long road, hand in hand.
“and i love you” he let out.
“what?”
“what?” he repeated after you.
“what did you sa-“
he cut you off with a kiss, your first kiss.
cherry blossoms fell from the trees and the wind caressed your skin.
his lips were soft, locked with your lips. it was perfect, the kind of fairytale you were always wishing you could have finally came true, with the person you loved the most.
when you parted your lips to get some air, both of you giggled and he put his forehead against yours.
“i said i love you” he smiled.
“i love you too”
regardless of the sudden confession, you decided to stay as friends, and when the both of you will feel ready, you’d try it out.
at age sixteen, your mother’s condition started to go downhill. she got sick and had to take medical exams every now and then, ever since then, you decided to spend time with her as much as you could.
“good morning mom! how are you feeling today?” you asked with a huge smile on your face when you saw your mother.
“feeling as usual, nothing new” she gave you a weak smile, “have you eaten yet?”
you shook your head, “i was at the garden after father had his daily complains over me, i needed to take some breathes”
your mother nodded and hugged you, “i’m sorry your father is like that, if being a selfish father was a competition he’d definitely win”
both of you giggled and spent a few hours together.
you never told sunghoon anything about your mother’s condition, every time he’d ask about her well-beings you’d say she’s doing well but she’s too busy with duties, and he’d suspect nothing.
at the age seventeen, your mother’s condition worsened, she had doctors around her all the time.
“hello mother” you smiled.
“y/n! good morning” she tried to smile back.
“how are you—“
“i must ask you something before it’s too late” she cut you off.
“what is it?”
“i’ve been thinking about it for a while, and it might be silly and selfish of me to ask you to do that” she sighed, “please promise me you’re going to marry sunghoon”
“what?” you asked confused.
“he’s treating you well y/n, i don’t think i’ve ever seen you happier than when you’re with him. you’re perfect for each other” she nodded, “i don’t have much time left, hearing you promising you’d marry the man who makes you the happiest, would help me leave peacefully, to know that you’re going to live the life you deserve”
“i promise mom, i promise i’ll marry him but please, you have much time left, don’t say such nonsense!”
your mother hugged you and thanked you. guess it wasn’t so well-hidden that you were in love with sunghoon.
on one of the days your father called you. before walking inside his room you rolled your eyes, what kind of a complain he has now?
“hello father” you looked at him coldly.
“y/n,” he called, “i need to ask you to do something”
“huh?” you looked over him confused, “you never ask me for favors”
“your sister is too busy with her duties, so i trust you with this one” he shortly explained.
“okay,” you nodded, “what is it?”
“i need you to come with me to visit the other neighbor kingdom—“
“but we were never on good terms with them, they’re hybe’s kingdom biggest rivals too!” you cut him off.
“they’re the only ones that can help us with your mother’s condition. we must do anything we can to help her” your father sighed, “they have a son who’s interested in you, they requested to see you too”
you shook your head, “i’m not interested in him—“
“this is the only way to help your mother!” he shout and you backed away.
“what about hybe kingdom! can’t they help in any kind of way?” you argued.
your father shook his head, “they can’t do anything about it, and they must not know about your mother’s condition”
“so going to the rival kingdom and risking your good friendship is better?”
“you’re coming with me and it’s final”
a few days before your visit in your neighbor kingdom, sunghoon came over.
before he went to search for you, he heard two servants talking about something that drawn him to it.
“did you hear about y/n’s mother’s condition?” one of them said.
“it keeps on getting worse, poor y/n! i heard she has to go to the other kingdom to ask for their help together with the king” the other replied.
“i heard they’re the only ones that could help! hybe kingdom knows nothing about it because they don’t want to bother them too much, i also heard the son of the other kingdom is interested in y/n, what about prince sunghoon!”
“poor them, i just hope she won’t end up with their son. i was rooting for y/n and sunghoon endgame”
“agree, i also heard their daughter is interested in sunghoon! this is risky” she shook her head.
“y/n is strong, she won’t marry the son i just know it” they both nodded their heads and sunghoon slowly walked back.
he refuses to believe what he just heard. y/n’s mother’s condition worsens? y/n marrying someone else? he’ll never let that happen.
“sunghoon!” you called and hugged him, “i was searching for you instead of you searching for me”
sunghoon was not responding, he was too deep in thoughts and didn’t know how to stop them.
“sunghoon?” you waved your heads in front of him and he finally came back on track.
“i was just thinking about something” he smiled.
“would you like to talk about it?” you smiled warmly at him.
how could you smile so widely when youre going through all of this?
“it’s not something that should bother you” he smiled and kissed your cheeks.
you spent the rest of the day looking out for sunghoon, he was different today, as much as he didn’t want to show it, you noticed.
the next day sunghoon found himself standing in front of his biggest rival kingdom. he never thought he’d have to step his leg into this kingdom, but he’d do anything for you as long as he could.
“park sunghoon! i’ve never thought i’d witness a hybe royal inside my kingdom!” the king teased.
sunghoon closed his eyes and clenched his jaw, “i need your help and you’re the only one that can help me” he said firmly.
“we’re rivals, why would i want to help you?”
“because i have something you want” he sighed, “i’ll be getting my kingdom sooner or later, i’ll give it to you together with my crown”
“you’ll lose your crown for something possibly stupid?”
“i need you to help princess y/n’s kingdom. the queen’s condition is getting worse. i heard you gave the best doctors that can help her”
the king laughed, “you’re doing this for y/n and not for yourself? what a stupid prince you are!”
sunghoon looked away, fighting the urge not to stab the king and fight him.
“very well, i will help in exchange of your crown”
their agreement was that the king will send his best doctors to help your mother, and as soon as sunghoon will get his crown, he’ll give it to the king. if one of them breaks the agreement, it’s off.
a few days passed, and it was supposed to be your visit day in the other kingdom, except that it got canceled.
“did you tell anyone about this visit?!” your father shout at you and you shook your head.
“how come he sent me this stupid letter saying that if we step into his kingdom he’ll declare a war!”
“i don’t know! i did nothing!” you argued.
“something stopped him, more like someone! i’m going to find out who did this!” your father roamed outside his room, slamming the door harshly and you flinched.
a week passed and your mother’s condition wasn’t doing any better, the doctors told you it was already time to say goodbye but you refused to do so, you refuse to believe you won’t be able to see your mother everyday soon.
everything was too overwhelming and stressful, you decided to go to your second home, you needed some comfort and it’s been a while since you saw sunghoon anyway.
“what are you up to?” you found him in the castle’s garden, deep in thoughts.
“just thinking about something”
“by something you mean me?” you teased and he smiled, not answering your question because the answer is quite obvious.
you then hugged him tightly, and sighed deeply as you rest your forehead on his shoulder.
“is everything okay?” he caressed your back slowly.
“my mom isn’t doing well lately” you finally confessed. you had to let it all out and tell sunghoon the truth.
“she’s sick, too sick. and the last week was such a roller coaster, her condition isn’t getting better and it’s our time to say our final goodbyes, i’m not ready for that sunghoon” you sobbed, “i’m sorry for dumping it all on you and telling you all of this now when it’s late i just—“
“it’s okay” even though he already knew about your mother’s condition, he was so glad that you finally opened it up and told him, “i’m here for you”
he held you tighter than before and whispered sweet comfort words that always knew how to calm you down.
right after you left he thought about what happened.
he made a deal with the other kingdom, the king was supposed to help your mother, how come her condition worsened? something didn’t make sense to him at all.
“sunghoon!” his father called him and sunghoon rushed to the king’s room.
“yes father?”
“you’re getting married to our biggest rivals daughter and didn’t even tell us? are you out of your mind?” he shout.
sunghoon could’ve swore that in that moment his heart stopped beating, “what?” he asked in disbelief.
“the other king sent us a letter! inviting us to your wedding with his daughter! we’ve never been so humiliated, how could you betray your family?” his mother interrupted.
sunghoon shook his head, “there must be a misunderstanding—“
“how come?” the king asked, “your name is written on that letter! and it was probably sent to all the other kingdoms!!”
“what about y/n?!” his mother asked and his eyes widened.
“y/n…?”
“how do you think she’ll feel receiving that letter? huh?”
“no, no! none of this is true! you must believe me!”
“explain yourself then! we’re here waiting!” sunoo, one of sunghoon’s brother argued.
sunghoon sighed, shutting his eyes tightly and clenching his fists, “y/n’s mother, the queen, her condition is getting worse. she’s been awfully sick for a few years already, i overheard their servants talking about how only the other kingdom could help her because they don’t want to bother us. so i went to them myself, i made a deal with the king that he’ll help the queen in exchange of my throne—“
“are you out of your—“
“jay! let him talk” the queen shushed him.
“yes! i was ready to give up my crown if it means i can help her in any way!” sunghoon sighed, “the king obviously did nothing and lied to me! and now apparently im ‘marrying his daughter’ you know damn well that’s never going to happen because i want to marry y/n!”
sunghoon’s mother wiped out her tears and hugged sunghoon, “i’m sorry you had to go through this, you could’ve told us—“
“i didn’t want to bother you too, this story is complicated than you think”
“what about y/n’s mother’s condition?” the king asked quietly.
“y/n said it’s been getting worse, they started to say their final goodbyes” sunghoon whispered and the room became quiet, as a respect for the queen.
“you should go to her, to check on her” heeseung suddenly spoke.
“yeah, i bet she needs someone by her side right now” jungwon added.
sunghoon nodded and with his parents’ approval he went to your kingdom.
he searched for you around and saw you staring at your garden, he smiled for himself and tapped your shoulder.
“hey” he said.
“what are you doing here?” you asked coldly.
“what?” he tilt his head, “i’m here to visit you”
“don’t you have a wedding to go get prepared to?” you scoffed, “go away park, you’re not welcomed here anymore”
sunghoon had been stabbed a few times in his life, but your words hurt him more than ten stabs at once.
“you have to listen to me i—“
“there’s nothing to explain! i got the letter, saw your name on it and it was enough for me to understand this was all a game for you” you shout, “i can’t believe i actually believed your bullshit”
“i hate you, park sunghoon” you spit out, nothing but hate is in your fierce glance at him. he just chuckled, “you don’t mean that”
“oh i do,” you nodded, “and to think that i actually promised my mom i’ll be marrying you” you chuckled in disbelief.
“looking back at that promise, i realize why you used to believe that promises are stupid” you added.
“i’m sorry” he apologized, “sorry isn’t going to change anything, is it?”
“y/n—“
“just get out, please” you were being nice, asking him to leave and pointing your hands to the door although he already knew where to go.
sunghoon didn’t want to bother you, he thought you’d probably relax in a day or two, and he’d be able to talk it out with you.
you can’t just erase all your feelings and delete all your memories after so many years, right?
as soon as he got out he went to the other kingdom, to finally get some sense into that stupid, useless king.
“park sunghoon! so nice to see you my son-in-law!” the king said and sunghoon only wanted to punch his face.
“wedding? with your daughter? son-in-law? you’re out of your fucking mind!” he spit out.
the king only laughed in his face, “why? wouldn’t you like to be my son? i’ll take good care of you”
sunghoon rolled his eyes, “the deal is canceled, you won’t get any crown or another kingdom, fix whatever you did, you ruined my life anyway and you never even helped y/n’s mother”
“oh but i feel like i haven’t ruined your life enough”
“cut it off, we both know my kingdom will finish you once we’ll declare a war”
“what makes you think that?”
“i did” another voice was heard in the room.
sunghoon’s father stepped in and put his hand on sunghoon’s shoulder.
“and i’m afraid i also know too many secrets about you, old friend” he teased, “leave my son alone, and don’t you dare ruin his life again. he did a mistake asking for your help but he did what he had to do”
sunghoon’s father then dragged him out of the kingdom back to theirs.
right after sunghoon left your room, you went out to breathe and relax your brain a bit.
how could sunghoon do this to you? everything he ever said to you, every hug, every joke, was it all a lie to him?
there must be a reason behind it, but you’re too hurt to even care about it. no reason could be enough for you right now.
you decided to focus on being next to your mother, spending her last days together and showing her the brightest side of you, you didn’t tell her anything and she didn’t suspect anything so you just left it be.
three days passed ever since you last heard from sunghoon.
you miss him, you miss everything and anything about him. you needed his comfort the most right now, but you couldn’t bring yourself to see him.
“y/n, sunghoon is here to pay a visit” one of your servants informed you.
“tell him i don’t want to see him,” you sighed, “and tell him to take care” you whispered that line.
you refused to see him in any cost. you’re too angry to even care about his feelings right now. all you could feel is betrayal, and hurt.
in one of the next days, you went out to the garden to read some books and write on your diary.
when you got back inside the castle you saw your mother’s doctors standing with their heads down.
“we’re sorry your highness, we did everything we could” they said and couldn’t even make eye contact with you as their eyes were full with tears.
you froze there for a few minutes, you knew this day would come but could never prepare yourself enough for that. you didn’t want to believe this day would come so fast.
“please tell me i’m dreaming” you told them but they shook their heads, “we’re very sorry your—“
they got cut off when they saw you falling to the ground, sobbing and covering your eyes.
you were crying like a little child who lost their ice cream, refusing to get up and screaming at everything.
the last few days were just about you and her, she taught you everything you needed to know about life and royalty.
“you need to be a good wife to sunghoon!” she smiled.
“mom! he has to be a good husband before that!”
“you’re right! if he’s being mean tell him you’d leave him and take all of his money” she joked and you giggled.
“i don’t need money”
“you don’t, but you do need to annoy him and help him realize he’s nothing without you!”
all of those memories past by your mind all day, thinking about your dear mother, who was there for you when no one else was.
“who’s going to be by my side now, mom?” you asked quietly, “i already miss you so much”
it was dinner time in hybe’s kingdom, all seven brothers sat together with their parents.
“sunoo, we’ve found the perfect wife for you! you’re going to meet her at the ballroom on ni-ki’s birthday!! isn’t that exciting?” the queen clapped in excitement.
“yeah, very exciting!” sunoo tried to sound cheerful, but failed miserably in sunghoon’s eyes.
he pitied his younger brother for being the only one who’s being forced to someone he doesn’t even know.
sunoo explain multiple times to his parents that he wants to marry someone out of love, and that he believes that when it’s time, he’ll meet the one for him. but his parents turned deaf to his thoughts.
“i already met her once, she’s really pretty! the perfect pair for you!”
“your highness” a few servants came into the room and interrupted the dinner.
“is it important? we’re having dinner right now—“
“queen (name) of (name) kingdom is no longer with us” the servants lowered their heads as a respect and the king got up from his seat instantly.
sunghoon’s eyes widened, he was left speechless and froze in his place.
“we’ll be going to pay our respects tomorrow morning together, prepare yourselves” the king said and left the dining room.
sunghoon didn’t know what to do. it has already been a week and he’s been trying to reach out to you, but you rejected him every time.
he sent you letters but didn’t get any back. he was hopeless.
what is he supposed to do now? he didn’t even say his last goodbye to his mother-in-law.
the next day, you received loads of letters from loads of kingdoms, thanking the queen for her service and mourning her death.
hybe’s kingdom however, came personally to comfort you and the rest of your family.
the king and the queen, and six of their children. yes, only six of them. one of them was missing.
park sunghoon didn’t come to comfort you.
“we’re very sorry to hear the devastating news, the queen was the kindest soul we’ve ever got to meet” the king shook your father’s hands and pat his back.
the six sons came to you and hugged you. you hugged them back and broke down. the six sons already became your brothers long time ago, you felt safe around them.
“we’re sorry y/n, we’re here for you now” heeseung, the oldest one said with a comforting smile.
as much as you were thankful for them, you were hoping to see a certain person, a person who didn’t even bother showing up.
it only added up to your anger on him, how could he do that? what happened to always being there for you?
“sunghoon felt a bit sick and unwell today, he couldn’t get up from his bed, he really wanted to come” the queen smiled weakly at you and you returned the smile.
you spent the rest of the day with your six brothers, completely forgetting about your father and sister, they were here to comfort you and be with you.
“sunoo,” you called out, “hm?” he answered quietly.
“is sunghoon really sick?” you asked and he nodded, “i think the news about your mother caught him off guard, he couldn’t even speak after he heard the news”
you pressed your lips together and nodded, “please wish him well, i hope he’ll get better as soon as possible”
“i will do that” he smiled warmly at you.
just because you’re hurt by him, doesn’t mean you don’t care about him. he still holds a big place in your heart.
the next days passed by slowly, you spent most of your time in your room, sometimes even refusing to get out for a whole day.
sunghoon crossed your mind every day. your last words to him crossed your mind every day too.
you said you hate him, but you lied. you love him, you love him too much that it hurts.
you feel too betrayed and hurt by him but it’s somehow the last thing that interests you.
you just need to see him and hug him. but your ego wouldn’t let you.
so you waited for him to fight for you, you knew he’d try again, and again, and again, that’s just the person that he is.
after a while of isolating yourself in your room, you decided to get out and read some books.
that’s what your mom would want you to do, to move on and start a new life.
as you were reading your book, you heard a familiar voice calling you.
“y/n,” your heart skipped a beat. you were too scared to turn around and see the person you were so hoping to see for so long.
“please tell me you’re not who i think you are” you breathed slowly.
“i’m sorry” he let out.
you finally decided to turn around and you met his eyes. it’s been a while since you last saw him, you missed staring at his beautiful face, and his beautiful moles that made his face look ten times better, his kissable lips that always felt soft against yours, you missed everything about him.
“please,” he whispered, “please hear me out this time”
you blinked a few times, still not believing that he’s actually in front of you.
“you didn’t show up when i needed you the most, you betrayed me and lied to me, why would i listen to any of your excuses now?” you argued, but deep down you wanted to hear him so badly.
“y/n please” he pleaded, “just listen to what i have to say, and it’s up to you wether to believe it or not, just please, i don’t want us to break apart without you hearing the reason behind it”
you let out a few tears to fall and slowly nodded, he was right, you never let him to explain himself, you were too selfish and cared about your feeling that you didn’t even care about his.
he told you the whole story from the start, and you were sobbing your heart out.
“i’m sorry,” you let out, “i’m sorry for refusing to listen to you, i’m sorry for rejecting you so many times, i’m sorry for telling you that i hate you—“
“stop apologizing stupid,” he chuckled, “it’s over now isn’t it? we’re even now right?”
“it’s over now, promise me you won’t ever hide from me something like that again” you extended out your pinky.
“but you said that promises are stu—“
“not when it comes to you” you smiled.
instead of locking his pinky with you he cupped your face and pulled you into a kiss.
“i love you y/n, i’m sorry it took me a while to get back to you” he whispered.
“i love you too sunghoon, im sorry for rejecting you multiple times” you giggled.
“finally! get married already and leave this kingdom please!” you heard your sister in the back.
“i’m sorry that my sister can’t be a bit more like your brothers” you awkwardly smiled and sunghoon laughed.
“she’s right though, let’s get married as soon as possible and get our own kingdom” he pecked your lips.
“IN TWO DAYS??”
“well you said you wanted to get married as soon as possible! i already planned everything!” sunghoon’s mother smiled and hugged the both of you.
“can’t say i’m not biased, i’ve been shipping the two of you ever since you both met” the king added.
“are they gonna have babies as soon as possible now too?”
“NI-KI!!!!”
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#enhypen imagines#enhypen drabbles#enhypen#enhypen reactions#enhypen scenarios#enhypen fluff#enhypen headcanons#enhypen sunghoon#park sunghoon x reader#sunghoon imagines#sunghoon scenarios#sunghoon fluff#sunghoon x reader#sunghoon angst#sunghoon drabbles#enhypen x reader
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Beckham II: 1 New Beginning
Please find instagram aesthetic here.
Post here explains how I've wrote it, I think it's quite simple.
This is the first part of my new series and I hope you enjoy xx (3k words)
“Do you ever think about how crazy it is that you’re an icon in Barcelona and yet your dad played for Real Madrid?”
“I try not to think about that. I think that bothers him more than me.”
“Does he have any Barcelona shirts?”
“Of course he does.”
…..
“David, how does it feel watching your daughter play for Barcelona?”
“It’s the best feeling in the world. I’m guessing you were expecting some kind of rivalry but I’ll always support my daughter.”
…..
Barcelona, February 2023.
One down, nine to go.
It was like clockwork in your brain. Training would finish, everyone else would rush to get back into the training room and get back to their everyday life. Yet here you were, on your own, just how you like it. You and the ball. Free kick after free kick after free kick. Ten in total, all from different areas, all with different aims but each one just as equally important in your brain.
Barcelona was a dream. You were here with the best players in the world but you hated letting anyone down. Every little mistake was over-analysed, picked at all because of who you were. At the weekend it was a wonder save which stopped one nestling in the top corner but that didn’t matter. It hadn’t gone in and therefore didn’t meet your expectations.
The expectations you put on yourself, multiplied by that moment four years ago.
You loved your father but many people probably didn’t understand that there wasn’t a gene for taking good free kicks.
Unbeknownst to you, all of this was about to change. “You’ve got a visitor.”
“If it’s another journalist, tell them I’m not interested.”
You couldn’t be bothered with whatever reply the press officer would tell you. It was the same every day. Someone wanted to speak to you, you said no. They came back the next day.
You’d think they’d get bored after four years of consistent turn aways but that was never the case. You did the press conferences, the interviews after games but a sit-down full-length interview was not something you felt like you could ever handle.
So you carried on, resetting the ball in the correct spot. Back to just you and the ball.
For February it was a sunny afternoon in Barcelona, the sun was still shining for the mid-afternoon with minimal wind. Perfect conditions to practice and as your teammates had pointed out you hadn’t needed any more persuasion to get that training vest on, your tattoos on full show. Along with football they were your biggest passion, your phone was full of tattoo inspiration and little doodles you did when you were bored, they were a big part of you and maybe the image you wanted to create for yourself.
You took inspiration from everything, football, the environment, your father. Growing up many would say you were already a carbon copy of him but the tattoos were the icing on the cake. Your mother may not have been as happy about them but they promised to accept all your passions and that included turning up every few months with a new collection of tattoos to show off.
…..
“Maria, is she copying you?”
“You’ll have to ask her. No of course not, I would say we take great inspiration from each other. We’ve got a few matching ones, I’ve done a few on her and she’s done the same to me. That’s kind of what started our friendship.”
“You both have ‘looks can be deceiving’ on your necks, is that true for her?”
“Depends on what you think of her. Maybe some find her scary but you have to find out if that’s true yourself.”
…..
You could hear someone approaching you, watching as you took the next kick nestling it into the bottom corner underneath the imaginary wall.
“Y/N, have you got five minutes?” The unmistakable voice of Sarina. Many people would love Serena Weigman to turn up at their training session, not you. Not now.
Shit. You almost didn’t want to turn around. Maybe if you stayed facing the other way she would leave. Leave you be in the bubble you’d created for yourself, nothing good could come out of this conversation.
But of course the Dutch woman wasn’t going to leave that easily, edging closer to you. “I only want to talk.”
“I gave you my answer a year ago.”
“Lots can change in a year. Five minutes. If you still want me to leave after, I’ll leave.”
Maybe it was worth hearing what she had to say. Nothing could change your mind anyway, you’d hear whatever she had to say and then she could leave.
You knew what she was here for and it didn’t surprise you what came out of her mouth next. “I want you back, I name my squad next week and I want you ready to play for us at the World Cup.”
“And I can’t do that.”
“Why not?”
“The fans are not that accepting, the players don’t deserve to be drawn into that drama because of me.”
“There’s always drama in football.” Maybe she had a point but off the back of the Euro’s success the lionesses have had nothing but positivity from the media and public. “We’ve lost Beth, we’ve lost Fran and I think the players would welcome your experience in that position. It’s your decision but I know deep down you want to prove people wrong and I want to give you that opportunity.”
“Some would say I don’t deserve that.”
“It will be different this time.”
“How?”
“It’s been four years, everything’s changed. We protect you guys, you have support systems in place, we have support systems. It’s not individuals anymore, it’s a team.”
“I made that decision to protect myself.” Almost four years ago you’d sent that letter, asking not to be selected for international duty again. They had no choice but to accept it and when Serena came into the role she approached you but you told her a tournament on home soil was not something you could mentally cope with. Not yet. “Why would now be different?”
“I’ve watched every game you’ve played in the last 18 months. I know you may not see a difference in yourself but I do, the interview after you lost to Lyon showed your spirit, your drive. I need players like you, it won’t be easy but I don’t want something that happened four years ago to stop you showing the world how talented you are.”
You were conflicted. Of course you’d love nothing more than to prove all those who bashed you before wrong, to make a difference on the world stage after winning every trophy you could with Barcelona. On the other hand it was just opening a can of worms you’d hidden all those years ago. Although you were only in Spain it felt like a different world, you turned your comments off on social media and they never came back on. Interviews were a no-go and your former friends were now distant acquaintances.
“Can I think about?”
“Of course you can. Like I said, the squad goes out on Tuesday so I need an answer by Monday. Any questions, I’m coming to the match on Sunday, maybe I can speak to you after?”
“Thank you.” With a soft squeeze to your shoulder she was off, except now you couldn’t focus knowing you were about to make a decision which would change everything.
…..
“You seem distracted.”
In hindsight it probably wasn’t the best idea to accept the dinner invite from Maria and Ingrid but you knew your best friends wouldn’t take no for an answer. The three of you along with Frido were sat at their dinner table, tucking into the tapas you’d ordered from your favourite restaurant and it wasn’t lost on any of them how your mind was elsewhere. Casually picking through your food was a total opposite to the way you usually devoured this.
“Y/N?”
You’d been debating on the way whether to speak to someone about it.
Maybe your dad? He’d gone through something similar but he was in Miami and would only just be getting up.
Your mum? She was the most rational option but she would never understand that pride of pulling on your national shirt.
Your therapist seemed the best option but the earliest session she had for non-emergencies was tomorrow.
“Y/N!” In your own little world you’d even forgot to answer their questions. “Are you alright?”
It could help speaking to them, couldn’t it? “I had a visitor after training. Sarina Weigman.”
“Shit man, I thought you said no.” Maria Leon was your best friend from the moment you stepped foot in that training room, you bonded over everything from tattoos to food. You’d been her wingman in getting with Ingrid and had a mutual understanding of each other’s situations with your respective national teams even if the circumstances were very different.
“She wants me back but I don’t know, this feels different from last year.” If Bonnie, your 5-year-old beagle, adopted 3 years ago to signify a new chapter in your life, wasn’t by your feet they would definitely be anxiously tapping the floor right now.
“They probably feel your absence more because they’ve lost other players.” Frido added some context. “Not that you wouldn’t have always walked into that team but now you definitely would. You’d be their main player.”
“I can see you’re considering it.” Ingrid pointed out. “When she came last year I could see you were like, definitely no, now you haven’t turned it down immediately.”
“There’s no right or way wrong to feel,” Maria tried to comfort me. “Only you can decide if you want to go back there.”
“I miss it.”
“Of course you do.” Ingrid agreed. “You wouldn’t watch all their games if you didn’t.”
“It’s just the fact that I’m comfortable here, I have been for so long and now I’m going to throw myself back into four years ago.” Four years ago when you’d been forced to move away from your club at the time in Chelsea and accept the fact that one mistake had changed everything. “Plus the media attention, no-one wants that in the lead up to the world cup.”
“They were your friends, I’m sure they’d understand.” Frido tried to make you see that side of things. “Shit happens in football but what happened to you when completely over the top of that.”
“I isolated them.” Of course you had friends in the squad at the time, in fact best friends. But as soon as you made the move to America you slowly distanced yourself from them as they did to you. You hated letting them down and completely understood that being associated to you meant unnecessary exposure where perhaps they would not want it.
“So you’ll make friends again.”
You’d changed as well, grown into a completely different person in that time. Your appearance and attitude on the pitch were a distinct opposite to the crippling shyness you had yet to shake off. “Maybe.”
“You will,” Maria assured you. “Plus I think Bonnie told me she wanted a sleepover with me.”
“Oh did she?”
“I’m not swaying you either way but if that’s what you want, I’ll support you all the way.”
“We all will.” Frido added wrapping her arms around you to bring you into her side. “We love you.”
“Thank you, I love you all too.”
“Speak to your dad, maybe even your mum. I’m sure they’d want to help.”
One of the funniest moments in your life had to be watching your teammates introduce themselves to your parents when they came out to watch your first match in the Blaugrana. Watching their nerves dissipate when they realised how down to earth, especially your mother was, when it came to their children. Of course their name brought so much extra attention to you but you couldn’t have asked for a better upbringing.
Maybe it was their words that made you do it but subconsciously you knew the best thing to do was to ring them. So as you got into bed that night, once you got back, Bonnie at your feet watching, you rang the number you’d had memorised for years.
“Hi baby.” His voice almost brought tears to your eyes. Although you tried to be as independent as possible, wanting to be your own person, you sometimes wished you could just go back to spending every night in his arms.
“Hi dad.”
“What’s wrong?” You hated how easily he could read you, how those two words were enough for him to know something was wrong.
“It’s nothing.”
“You know you can tell me anything.”
“I know dad.” Out with it. “Sarina Weigman came to visit me today, she wants me to go and join them in the next international break.”
“And what do you want?”
“I think I want to.”
“You think?”
“I just know that if I do I’m just going to be brought back to that moment.”
“Then you’ll go back to a moment where the referees made a terrible decision. Football fans are fickle you know that as much as I do but you’ve watched it back enough to know that nine times out of ten nothing happens. The commentator did you no favours, Phil didn’t stand by you as he should have and the media hung you out to dry.”
“I know.”
“But as awful as it was it made you the person you are today and your stronger now then you’ve ever been before. If you want to go back then you’ll make it work. I know you will.”
“Thanks dad, now how is…”
,,,,,
“How many times have you watched that tackle back?”
“Over a thousand times.”
“Do you think you should have been sent off?”
“Of course not.”
……
You loved Barcelona, from the moment you stepped through those doors 3 years ago you’d been welcomed in and never looked back. In 2019 you moved to America but your year out there was plagued with depression and homesickness resulting in a lack of game time, when Barcelona came calling it was a difficult decision with your family ties but they had a project, they had a good set up and you knew the onus wouldn’t just be on you. The first six months were still tough, working out Spanish football to both play with your teammates and counter the opposition but by the end of the season you felt at home for the first time in 2 years.
Your role this year had been heightened by the loss of one of your midfield partners in Alexia, but you were adaptable and that’s probably how you found yourself 4-0 up, having just scored a second goal in the second half.
“It’s almost like you’re trying to impress someone.” Mapi whispered giving you a half hug as you walked back into your own half.
“Shut up.”
“I bet she’s panicking that you might turn it down now.”
“She’s got other players Maria.”
“But none of them are you.”
The match stayed at 4-0, some of the youngsters coming on to see the game out.
You’d never been in a team like this, of course you had little arguments and there were small groups within the team, but everyone worked so hard for each other. And with that came the protectiveness, when you joined you were only 21, now 24 and the older ones took you under their wings. You’d been daunted a lot at the fact of playing fellow English players in the Champions League but they’d been your shield for those moments.
It blew your mind when the younger age groups joined you and they speak about that moment. Most of them staying up late to watch it making you feel old. But that meant they came to you for advice a lot of the time. Maybe this time though it was time to get advice from them.
“Hey little one.” Maria Perez was the first one you spotted in the changing room. “You played really well today.”
“Thank you.”
“How are you feeling about being called up?” It was only yesterday that the Spanish squad had been leaked and she was once again in it.
“Excited, another opportunity to prove myself.”
“I like that you see it that way.”
“Everyone should, it’s no different to playing here, as long as you be yourself you can never be disappointed.”
…….
@jillsmithjournalist: Serena Weigman is present at the Barcelona match. No current England players are playing however star player Y/N Beckham scored twice. Beckham has not played for England since she withdrew from selection in August 2019 amid public backlash and a rumoured feud with England manager Phil Neville. Could a return be on the cards?
@newlionesses_x: Surely she can’t just pick and choose when to come back.
@wslfan: Fine without her last year
@england123: Liability for England
@barcelonafan: All you hating on Beckham are crazy, one of the best players in the world and you don’t want her back because of something that happened 4 years ago, grow up. Could tell she struggled when she joined us but this past year she’s been exceptional, people change, mistakes happen (even though she should never have been sent off in the first place)
…..
You’ve known your decision for a long time but you still delayed giving it as long as possible before you could wait no longer. You could see she was the only one left in the hospitality area as you entered, the table she had chose overlooking the pitch you’d just performed on.
This was what you wanted and now it felt only right to give yourself that opportunity again.
“I’ll do it.”
#woso imagine#woso#woso x reader#woso imagines#barcelona femeni#lionesses#engwnt#david beckham#beckham#football
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Part 2.
What if Eddie moved on from thinking Steve and Nancy should get back together when Jonathan came back and saw how they’re actually destined to be together even tho they still have shit to figure out.
I know it’s a popular hc that Eddie and Robin clock each other immediately BUT I still think that as two queer kids in a small backwards town they’re more worried about no one finding out about them so they wouldn’t notice someone else. So worried about themselves that they (like straight people) also fall into the mindset of ‘everyone is straight until proven otherwise’.
What’s the result of this? Eddie seeing how close Robin and Steve are and thinking there must be something there. And because Steve is a little more affectionate than Robin, now Eddie thinks he’s pining after her.
“Why aren’t you and Robin together?”
“It’s not like that. She’s my best friend.”
“I don’t buy it.”
So now Steve has to put up with Eddie constantly going on about how Steve should just ask her out already, what’s he waiting for, she probably likes him back.
It bothers Steve to no end. He wished society had advanced enough to realize that men and women can be platonic friends without having to explain themselves.
A nightmare.
And Steve would never out Robin, so telling him the truth wasn’t an option. And he really wasn’t interested in dating anyone right now, so that was out of the question. What could he do to get Eddie to understand that him and Robin would never happen?
Then he remembered. It seemed so distant but Steve actually tried to tell Robin he liked her once. It was kinda embarrassing to think about now, specially because he saw Robin as nothing more than a friend now. He couldn’t even remember what having a crush on her ever felt like. And maybe he never even had one, shitty friends and shitty parents maybe warped his perception and then he couldn’t see the difference between platonic and romantic feelings. Well, that was for another day. He could tell the difference now. He thinks.
He could just tell Eddie about that moment in starcourt. He would just leave out the part about Robin having absolutely bad taste in girls. Foolproof. Eddie would leave it alone now.
“What? She just rejected you and then you decided to become her best friend?” He looked surprised, like the idea was impossible to understand.
“And I don’t regret it. She’s the best friend I’ve ever had.”
“You’re crazy.” Steve didn’t expect that.
“What do you mean?”
Eddie looked at him and his expression was hard to read. “You’re telling me that after being rejected you didn’t need time away? Just jumped to being a platonic friend? Despite your feelings?” He scoffed. “I could never do that.”
“It wasn’t that hard.”
“Now I know you’re lying. You still like her?”
Steve really tried to convince Eddie that he didn’t like Robin anymore. But no matter what he would say he didn’t believe him.
So Steve gave up.
Now he goes along with it. It’s easier. It stopped Eddie from trying to set them up or whatever.
Except it didn’t.
Now Eddie came up with the absolute great idea of making her jealous. Which was so so ridiculous Steve had to hold back laughter. He didn’t mention how much Robin had heard about past dates. This was beginning to amuse him just a little bit.
“How would I even do that?” Steve asked, curious as to what Eddie would come up with.
“You know? Let me think about this.” He made a show of putting his hand on his chin, contemplating. “Show up at work with some marks on you neck. You know, see how she reacts to that knowledge.” Steve knows how Robin reacts to that. Before Vecna, on his endless quest to find ‘the one’ (what a waste) he had some hookups. One time he went into work with one or two hickeys on his neck. Robin wouldn’t even bat her eyes, just would ask ‘who was it now?’ and then ask if he would see her again. The answer was no. Eddie didn’t know this.
“Yeah well, I really don’t feel like going on a date and hooking up with someone just to use it to bait a reaction. Seems kinda cruel to the other person.” Steve thinks that should be enough to shut this idea down.
“Huh. Maybe you’re better than me because I didn’t even think about that.”
Steve doesn’t reply, just snorts. And he thinks that’s gonna be the end of it. There’s nothing else Eddie can really do or come up with. Right?
Wrong.
“I could do it.” Did Steve hear that right? Huh?
“What?” Steve asked.
“Give you a hickey. It’s no big deal, really.”
If you asked Steve why he said yes. Man, he wouldn’t be able to tell you. He really doesn’t know! It’s like someone possessed him and he was moving his mouth, but it wasn’t him. Maybe it was because he couldn’t come up with a reason not to do it fast enough that would convince Eddie.
They were both sitting on the couch so Eddie just leaned in and started on a spot on the left side of his neck. Steve’s hand instinctively moved to the back of Eddie’s head. One wouldn’t think so based on its appearance but Eddie’s hair was surprisingly soft.
Suddenly there were teeth scraping his neck. Steve let out a noise that he hadn’t heard before. He accidentally pulled a little on Eddie’s hair, he was gonna apologize but Eddie didn’t seem to mind, he just hummed.
“Did you just bite me?”
Eddie pulled back and sneered. “Sorry. I let my impulsive thoughts win.” What does that even mean?
Steve was gonna ask if that did it but then Eddie moved to his lap, straddling him. “What are you doing?”
“Getting the other side?” Makes sense? Honestly his mind was getting a little mushy and was only focusing on Eddie’s weight on him. When Eddie leaned in again, Steve’s hands traveled to rest on his hips. Eddie’s on his shoulders to have leverage, his hips hovering now.
Steve tipped his head back to give him a little more space. With more space Eddie seemed to be satisfied with that spot and moved lower, however this next one was sensitive to Steve, he’s always known that. He was gonna say so but he couldn’t, Eddie was already on it. He let out a breathy sound and gripped Eddie’s hips tighter making him slam back on his lap. He thinks Eddie moaned, he’s not sure tho. “Sorry.” He muttered.
He didn’t think he’d enjoy this.
He did.
Maybe he should put a stop to it.
He hasn’t so far.
It went on a little longer. Some hands wandering. Some sounds uttered. Minds getting floaty.
He knew it was coming to an end when Eddie started leaving kisses to soothe the spots, he trailed until he got to his ear. Which he actually licked. It was probably to make a joke but it only made Steve shiver.
“I think you’re done.” Eddie said. He hesitated a second before climbing off his lap.
Steve knew he looked winded. Eddie tried to look casual but he’s known him for a while and could see that it was feigned casualness.
“Uh. Good.” Lame. Steve is lame.
Mike Wheeler was right because Steve Harrington is lame.
How is he gonna explain this to Robin?
#steddie#steve x eddie#steve harrington#eddie munson#eddie x steve#stranger things s4#stranger things#stranger things 4#steve harrington x eddie munson#I was looking at a burn my flat iron left on my neck#thought it looked like a hickey#then I thought about steddie and hickeys#because of course#my hyperfixation is stronger than ever#every thought I connect to steddie#and then this happened#this is more crack than anything#me thinks#crack#english is my second language#wait guys#they don’t even know they like each other yet#and they do this shit#mer writes sometimes#ficlet#headcanon
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Spar With Me
(Part 2)
Mizu x Reader
Summary: Not much sparring actually happens this time. But you still somehow wind up in an embarrassing position.
Disclaimers: light language, has not been proofread, shorter and way more embarrassing than the last chapter
Part One
Part Three
————————————————————
Some time had passed since the incident between you and Mizu. Neither of you had really said more than two words about it to each other or to anyone else. You said what you needed to and that was that in your eyes.
Although it remained awkward for a while, you two continued to get to know each other despite Mizu’s initial reluctance. He didn’t seem all that interested in talking to you at first, but after a while he eventually started answering back and making conversation.
“So… where did you grow up?” You asked, trying to start up a conversation as you all sat around the campfire that Ringo had set up. The small flames gave you a slight bit of comfort and warmth to counter the freezing cold that almost fully engulfed you. Your eyes shifted from the fire to look at Mizu, who yet again was simply staring ahead.
What was he thinking about? You wondered.
“Kohama.” He answered, then looked towards you. You smiled at the answer before replying,
“I’ve never been there before. What’s it like?” You asked. Normally you wouldn’t ask about people’s past, especially not someone who clearly had a rough one. But alas, there’s only so much you can get from a person without knowing what happened to make them who they are today.
Mizu’s eyes looked towards the fire, his chest moving heavily as he took a deep breath in and released a quiet sigh.
“It’s a nice place, especially this time of year. The people there are…” He hesitated to finish his sentence, luckily he didn’t have to because he had been interrupted by Ringo who came running back with a bunch of ingredients in hand.
“I have enough to make food for all of us!” He cheered loudly despite Mizu’s countless warnings for him to be quiet. You smiled at Ringo before looking back to Mizu who seemed to be lost in thought yet again.
For a man so serious about not getting distracted, he sure did get lost in thought quite a bit.
“Where did you learn to fight?” You asked pretty out of the blue, you didn’t know what compelled you to ask but you did. The man couldn’t help but let out a slight chuckle at your persistent questions. You were probably the most curious person he knew, well second to none other than Ringo of course. You constantly asked him questions, which sometimes he had to admit got a bit annoying, but he couldn’t help but enjoy having someone to actually talk to.
Mizu had gone so long living his life in solidarity that he had almost forgotten what having someone who cared by his side felt like. Last time he had that was well…
He didn’t want to remember.
“I was taken in by a blind man when I was very young. He taught me over the years.” He answered simply. You couldn’t help but absentmindedly scoot closer to Mizu, extremely interested in the fact that he had actually begun sharing parts of his life.
He noticed but didn’t think much of it.
“He made swords for the samurai who came to him but not every man who came left with a sword. He was very particular about who was worthy enough to wield a sword, and there was a reason for it. He even taught me how to make a sword of my own.” He shared, you glanced over to his katana that lay next to him on the fluffy snow. He gently picked it up, his long fingers caressing the outside of the sheath before ever so slightly showing the blade.
It shone a magnificent color, even in the shallow light of the fire, the design on the sword was more than enough to cause you to flat out gawk at it.
Sure you had seen him use the sword, and sure you had used swords of your own but there was a clear difference. None of the swords you used were yours, you were simply being a resourceful fighter when it came to it. Mizu’s sword however, it was clear that this was his sword.
You gently reached out your hand towards the sword, to which Mizu had cautiously pushed it towards you. Your fingertips gently glided atop the unsharpened edge of the blade. The metal was smooth and very cold. It nearly sent a shiver down your spine just by touching it. It didn’t take you too long before you took your hand off and looked back up at Mizu.
“Would you… teach me how to use one?” You asked. He turned to you with what you could almost make out as a surprised expression.
“I thought you already knew how to?”
“I know the basics… but I don’t know how to truly wield one.” You explained, earning a slight nod of acknowledgement from him. However, before he could just get up and offer to spar with you, he looked down and realized he was still drenched in blood. He had gotten into a massive fight not too long before you made camp and you supposed he had just forgotten given everything else going on.
To be fair, you too had stopped noticing after a while.
Without really another word, Mizu stood up and began walking away. He stopped just by some trees before stating , “I’ll be back.” And then off he went into the forest.
You had to admit he was quite an odd man, well other than his eye color and lack of stories to tell. He may have been odd but you couldn’t help but find him even the slightest bit attractive. When fighting, you couldn’t help yourself but to stare and watch as Mizu would masterfully take down several people at a time, all while making it look almost effortless. He seldom laughed or smiled but when he did it was like the gates of heaven had opened upon you just to shine a single beam of light through the form of his smile.
And his eyes. The one part that many people hated about him, yet you found them the most intriguing. His eyes were such a rare and striking blue, sure they came about due to a very upsetting reason, but they were beautiful nonetheless. They complimented his features in a way you couldn’t describe and it was upsetting to you that he couldn’t see just how beautiful you thought they looked.
Oh who were you kidding, you were in real deep when it came to feelings about him.
Ever since the last time you had sparred, you began to feel very different about Mizu. Ever since you had been held down underneath him.
It was such a simple thing really and it very quickly became less important than the true outcome of that exchange. But you still remembered it. The embarrassing yet… warm feeling you got as you stared up at him that fraction of a second before noticing his eyes. And even then that feeling didn’t go away.
He had only pinned you down for at most forty seconds, and yet that was the part that stuck with you the most. It was…
Not important.
None of that was important. You need to snap out of it, he’s not interested remember? He doesn’t need distractions, and you need to stop thinking about him.
You continued to argue with yourself, struggling to take your mind off the man before deciding, maybe you should just take a walk to clear your mind. How harmful could that be? A nice walk through the snow covered forest bathed in moonlight. Sounds relaxing just thinking about it.
You stood up quite abruptly which might’ve startled Ringo had he not already been preoccupied with cooking the food.
“I’m going to go take a walk really quickly to clear my head.” You explained earning a quick nod of approval from Ringo. With that you began to make your way through the forest.
It was just as peaceful as you had assumed it would be. You could still faintly hear the crackling of the fire as you walked in a random direction. You looked up, glancing at the snow covered trees which glittered in the moonlight. A light breeze made its way through the forest, rustling some of the trees and ever so slightly causing some of the snow to fall off of some of them.
You continued on, listening to the crunch of the fluffy snow beneath your feet as there was not much noise happening elsewhere. That was, until you heard the faintest noise of running water.
A waterfall would be a pleasant sight to sit at would it not?
Without thinking, you began to make your way towards the running water, your hands rubbing together to keep yourself warm as you neared the sound. The water sounded closer and closer until you had heard what you thought could be something in the water?
“It’s probably just an animal.” You thought to yourself as you continued to pass by many trees with not even a sense of fear of who or what could be in the water currently. You confidently made your way towards the pool of water, not realizing that you were also making a bunch of noise on your way, you haphazardly stepped on sticks and snow without another care or thought in the world. The only thing on your mind was relaxing by the water.
And there it was, a wide open pool of water with a waterfall. Just like the snow, the water glittered and glistened in the moonlight, giving it a dark blue hue as it rippled from the waterfall. You approached the edge of the water, wanting to merely lightly glide your fingers across the surface but as you had begun to walk towards it you had noticed something not too far from the edge. It was hard to tell what it was from the distance you were at so you walked a bit closer to it so you could possibly get a better look.
Once you had gotten close enough to it, you carefully picked up one of the pieces and that’s when you realized…
These were Mizu’s clothes.
Oh god.
You quickly dropped the piece of clothing right back where you found it, standing up and spinning around and very quickly being met face to face with Mizu himself.
Or… herself?
You tried not to look but your eyes acted before your mind could stop them and you had already seen parts of their body that maybe you shouldn’t have.
What is more important here is the fact that they were holding their sword right up to your face.
“Holy shit Mizu! I'm sorry!” You exclaimed, quickly slapping a hand over your eyes and turning back around to give them even the slightest sense of privacy.
“I just heard a waterfall and wanted to check it out, I didn’t even think about the fact that you could’ve been here and-“
“It’s fine.” You heard them answer from behind you. The sound of their sword being sheathed also gave you a new sense of relief but you continued to face away. “I heard you coming from a mile away and thought you were someone else.” They explained. You nodded, acknowledging that as a valid answer as you continued to face away from them.
“You are just full of surprises.” You said with a laugh, thinking that the situation was quite silly despite being absolutely mortified that you had accidentally breached someone’s privacy so heavily by accident.
Mizu didn’t really make a move or say anything before you continued,
“Your secret is safe with me. And next time I’ll wait for you to be done bathing before I go on my walks.” You joked trying to lighten the situation. You heard a lighthearted huff from behind you, recognizing it as a quiet laugh before hearing Mizu near you from behind.
“My clothes.” She stated pretty bluntly before you finally looked down in front of you, realizing you were pretty much blocking the very narrow path from Mizu to her clothes.
“My bad, I’ll just… get out of your way.” You said, absentmindedly backing up. Unfortunately because you couldn’t see where you were going you had bumped into Mizu as you walked back, causing you to practically leap forward in response.
“Sorry! Sorry, I’m just… bye.” Was all you could manage to say before you very quickly made your way back to camp.
How the hell were you supposed to face her now? This entire time the guy you had a crush on turned out to be a girl, which you didn’t mind in the slightest, but within the same time as that realization you also saw her naked, and then also bumped into her?
Why did you always end up in embarrassing situations, especially with her!
You finally made your way back to the camp, Ringo had just finished up his food as he looked up at you.
“Oh you’re back! How did your walk go?” He asked cheerfully, handing you a bowl of food.
“Kill me.”
#x reader#mizu blue eye samurai#mizu x reader#blue eye samurai#ringo blue eye samurai#blue eye samurai fanfic#blue eye samurai x reader#blue eyes#x gn y/n#x gn reader#gn reader#fanfic#fanfics#fanfiction#blue eyed samurai#I love my wife#unoislazy
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If We Were Vampires (C.S.)
summary: chris learns to look past his fear of growing up for a future with the girl of his dreams
contains: angst, lots of emotions, chris pov, 3rd person, a bit of fluff, some suggestive content, cussing, 1.5k words
“So what, Chris? You expect me to just sit around waiting for you to man up?”
“I never said you had to. If you feel like you wanna go, then go.”
Chris replays the moment over and over again as he lies in his bed, staring up at the ceiling. It’s been a week, and he still can’t figure out what went so wrong. He doesn’t even know how it started. But then again, he doesn’t know how any of this started.
Everybody knows what he thinks about relationships. Or more accurately how much he never thinks about them. There were just a million other things he found more interesting than chasing after some fairytale of finding the one.
But then he met her. She’d come out of nowhere, like a siren in her flowy white dress, and he’d been stuck in her orbit ever since.
He tries to call her again, but the phone goes straight to voicemail. If it wasn’t for his texts going through, he’d be sure he was blocked. Frustration floods over him and he goes to make another call before realizing she is the one he’d normally call when he felt like this.
“God, I feel so stupid.” He says, sniffling and burying his face in her neck.
“It's not stupid. You’re allowed to be sad.” She replies, her voice soothing as she runs her fingers through his hair.
“Over the fucking ninja turtles?” He asks, laughing a bit at himself at how dramatic he feels.
“Over your childhood coming to an end.” She supplies, pulling away so she can look him in the eyes. “You’re allowed to be scared of what comes next.”
He lets out a breath he didn’t even know he was holding as his eyes bounce between her kind warm ones. Somehow this girl he never went looking for has become one of the only people who can talk him off the edge.
He rests his head on her chest, listening to her heartbeat for a while before he speaks again.
“Come with me to what’s next," he requests quietly, a prickle of fear rising when he realizes how much he means it.
She's silent for a beat before she holds him tighter. “If you let me,” she whispers, the slightest tinge of sadness coating her words.
The only thing in his head now is her face. Her face when she lay next to him, wiping away at his tears. Her face when he’d agree to watch one of her lame shows just to see her smile. Her face before she stormed out of his house, her hand swiping over her eyes to fight back any tears. It makes him sick to think of her like that. But it makes him even sicker to know it was his fault.
He wants to go to his brothers’ room for advice but he knows what they will say and he needs to figure this out for himself. Opening up his notes app, he begins a list of pros and cons, making the title her name and typing until his fingers ache. He stares at the list, his vision going blurry with emotion. One side is so much longer, it’s almost comical and he chokes out a laugh that turns into a sob.
There’s only one thing that haunts both sides of his list and it makes his chest ache. ‘one day, I’ll lose her.’
It’s the truth no matter which way he spins it. They might get months. They might get forty years. But one day one of them will be left behind.
Chris closes his eyes, resolve taking hold of him suddenly. He might lose her eventually. But it doesn’t have to be today.
He picks his phone up to send her a voice memo, hoping against hope that she’ll listen and understand. “Hey…I tried calling but…um…I guess you don’t want to talk to me yet. Which I get.” He sighs, annoyed at himself for how bad he’s rambling.
“Listen, I’ve been an idiot. All that bullshit about labels and dating, I didn’t mean any of it. I was just scared. But I’m way more scared of letting you walk away from me. I’m ready to grow up… or at least I’m ready to try.” He pulls his finger up, letting the memo send as he cringes at his stupid way with words.
Shaking his head and letting go of whatever morsel of ego he has left, he records another message. “Anyway, if you think you can give us another shot, please come tonight. We’re still having our craft night. It will be fun. I know Nick wants to see you… and I.. I need to see you too. Let me know.”
Hours later, he’s leaning against the kitchen counter staring at the nonexistent replies in their thread when Matt walks over.
“You alright, man?” He asks, a hint of concern in his tone. He takes a spot next to his brother, peering over to see what has his attention. Matt sighs when he sees her name and places a hand on Chris’ shoulder. “You gotta stop torturing yourself.”
Chris looks up at his brother, trying and failing to hide the shine in his eyes. “I really fucked this up, didn’t I?”
Matt can’t quite find the words for a moment, stunned at the hurt on his brother's face. He composes himself quickly, biting his lip and shaking his head. “It’s going to be okay. She’ll come or she won’t. And then we’ll know.”
As their friends start to pile in and crowd around the table, Chris forces himself to stay in the moment. After his third time of running to the door at a knock and it not being her, he stays glued to his chair, trying to focus on his diamond painting.
He tries feebly to be a good host, making small talk and mild quips about Madi’s technique, but he’d like nothing more than to head downstairs and rot in his room.
Nick catches Matt’s eye, the two exchanging a brief “what the fuck do we do” glance before they head over to him. Nick leans over his shoulder, commenting on how hard of a pattern Chris chose but he just gives a disinterested nod in return.
Determined to make him laugh, Nick starts to go big, starting down rants that he knows Chris will love. He considers it a personal win when he hears Chris’ trademark laugh and places his hands on his brother's shoulders.
Chris looks up at his brothers, knowing despite their efforts to be sly exactly what they are doing, and gives them a small weak smile. He places his phone face down and gives his friends his full attention. There will be plenty of other nights to miss her.
“Must be the pizzas,” Nick mutters when he hears a faint knock on the door. He jogs down and swings the door open, stopping in his tracks when he sees her. A smile of relief breaks across his face and he pulls her into a tight hug, whispering a soft “thank god.”
They go up the stairs together, anxiousness taking hold of her when she spots him across the room. “Hi everyone.” She says quietly, the chatter pausing for a second as they look up at her.
They call out greetings but she doesn’t hear a word because Chris meets her eye, blinking slowly as if he’s convincing himself she’s really there. She wants to apologize. For being late, for ignoring his calls. But there are so many people here so she waits.
He wants to go to her and sweep her up in his arms. He wants to kiss her until they run out of air, make her understand exactly how much he wants this. But there are so many people here so he waits.
But it’s okay. For the first time, he’s confident that they’ve got time. For the first time, he’s relieved with how much time left there is to give her.
Tonight he’ll tell her for the first time how much he loves her. Tonight she’ll tell him back in a thousand different ways, her nails leaving small trails down his back as his skin meets hers again and again. And tonight he’ll watch her chest rise and fall until he can make himself believe she’s real.
But for now, he just breathes out a ragged breath and holds out his arms for her. So she goes to him, settling into his lap and starting a painting of her own. And even if he can’t make this last forever, he can have it now. And maybe it will even be enough.
🏷️: @sttzee @tillies33ssss @miloisdone1 @sstvrnioloo @junnniiieee07 @sturnioloslurps @mrsmiagreer @asturniolos
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I have a flower shop/tattoo parlor maxiel + loscar AU building from a tropical storm into a hurricane in my head so here are some thoughts
+ When Max hires him, this is what he says to Logan’s arrangement: “It is not the worst thing I’ve ever seen. I can make it better.” What he really meant was that Max could make Logan better, but he wouldn’t come to understand that until later.
+ There’s a phone that sits on the back wall of Max’s shop. The first time it rang while Logan was working, he’d mistakenly answered it. He’d watched Max’s face go bleach white from across the shop as Logan answered “Hello, this is Verstappen’s Floral, how can I help you?” The barrage of angry Dutch he’d gotten back in return had shocked Logan into silence, making it easier for Max to steal the receiver from his hand. Now, Logan knows to just let it ring.
+ Oscar is pretty sure Daniel only gave him an interview because their moms are in a book club together. The owner of Honey Badger Tattoos was always friendly and outgoing but he was notoriously possessive about his art. In the ten years the shop has been open, it’s had four employees. Daniel Ricciardo, the founder, Daniel Kvyat, Daniel’s partner who he bought out after the first year, Lando Norris who worked part-time at the front desk, and now Oscar.
“I’ve never had an apprentice before, I probably wouldn’t be very good at it,” Daniel says during his interview. He’d said he liked Oscar’s work and already showed an interest in teaching Oscar more of his signature American style. But the guy was still hesitant, fidgeting with excess nerves. “Just ask Lando.
Lando nods from his seat at the front desk which Oscar can see from the open door of Daniel’s office. “He doesn’t know what he’s doing half the time, I wouldn’t trust him to teach other people.”
Daniel does not look like that’s the support he was going for, wincing at the dry criticism but not arguing.
“That’s fine,” Oscar confirms with a shrug. He’s already done the majority of his apprenticeship under Mark Webber. But when the man decided he’d had enough of the South of France and was selling the shop and moving back to Australia, Oscar had to look for somewhere else to work. “I only have six months left before I can get my certification.”
Daniel doesn’t look very reassured. Oscar can take a hint so he decides to get out before he’s kicked out.
“Hey, it’s cool, mate, thanks for meeting with me anyway-”
“Can you start next week?” Daniel asks, leg bouncing up and down and rocking the desk he’s sitting behind. He sees Oscar’s confused expression and sighs. “I really need more help here.”
“Yeah,” Oscar decides, not looking a gift horse in the mouth. “I’ll text you my schedule.”
And that’s how he starts working for the Honey Badger.
+ “This is a tulip,” Max is saying in French, word draw out and pointing at the multi-colored bulbs. Logan has tried telling him that he’s lived in Europe for the majority of his life at this point and can do his job in English, French, and Spanish but Max doesn’t believe him. At least Logan’s starting to pick up more Dutch.
Logan is rescued from his impromptu language lesson by the bell on the door ringing. He turns towards the sound, customer service smile already in place.
“Hi, welcome to Verstappen Floral, how can I-”
“Oh, it is you again.”
Logan stops and looks at Max who is frowning at the guy who just came in. The man is curly-haired and tanned, with tattoos scrawled over the majority of visible skin. His grin is big and toothy when he shoots it at Max.
“Hey, Maxy, aren’t you happy to see me?”
Logan blinks in shock at the nickname. Even their regular customers don’t get to act that familiar with Max. Logan doesn’t get to act that familiar with Max.
Max crosses his arms, lips pursing. “For the last time, I do not know what these flowers mean. I speak four languages and plant is not one of them.”
“Always a ray of sunshine, aren’t you, Max?” The man asks, unphased by Max’s grouchy demeanor. He leans forward onto the glass counter, certainly leaving smudges behind, but Max surprisingly doesn’t yell at him about it. “Lando sent me to pick up his order.”
Lando is someone Logan knows. He comes in about every other week and talks to Max about streaming and video games that partly goes over Logan’s head. He always leaves with a red and white bouquet, though the flowers change each time.
“Why could he not come get them himself?” Max grumbles, heading in the direction of the cooler where they kept to-go orders. Daniel shrugs and wraps his knuckles against the glass.
"He was late for a meeting or something, you know I don’t ask about his other job,” Daniel supplies. He changes his focus to Logan and the blond is met with the full force of the man’s mega-watt smile. Logan blames his mom’s genes for how easily he blushes. “Hey, you’re the new guy, right?”
Logan opens his mouth to answer but Max is suddenly im between them, Lando’s bouquet in his hands.
“Yes, this is Logan, no, he does not want any of your garish tattoos.”
Daniel pouts at Logan’s boss. He wonders how it doesn’t look strange for a guy who’s at least 30 to be pouting.
“Don’t be mean, Maxy. I wasn’t even going to mention the tattoos.”
Logan racks his brain for tattoo shops nearby. They obviously have a close relationship outside of just Lando. And Lando did say he worked for an artist…
“Oh hey, are you the Honey Badger?” Logan asks, moving his head to be seen around Max’s wider frame. Daniel jerks his eyes away from Max’s, as if he’s been caught doing something he shouldn’t. “I pass by there all the time. Not a lot of shops do American style out here.”
Daniel’s face lights up, looking between Logan and Max. “Max, you hired an American?”
Max sighs, more long-suffering than Logan thinks is necessary. “This is why I did not want you to speak with him. I knew you were going to be weird about it.”
“I’m not being weird!” Daniel argues. “I’m just surprised!”
Max and Daniel have another weird silent staring contest. Logan clears his throat reluctantly and they both snap to him.
“Um, where’d you learn to do that style?”
Daniel looks ready to excitedly burst into the story of his tattooing style and his interest in America, but Max cuts him off by pushing the bouquet into his chest.
“We do not have time for that, these are going to wilt. Take these to Lando.”
“Bossy, bossy,” Daniel murmurs, picking up the bouquet gently. He doesn’t sound annoyed by Max’s demands. Rather amused, actually. He shoots Logan another grin over Max’s shoulder. “I don’t envy you, mate. But hey if you want to talk tattoos, come by the shop sometime.”
“Definitely!” Logan agrees before Max can say anything else on his behalf. Daniel shoots him a one-handed finger gun before turning back to Max. His smile becomes a lot less joking and more sincere.
“See you later, Maximus”
Max loses some of his prickliness, voice soft when he says, “Goodbye, Daniel.”
+ There’s a man talking to Lando at the front desk when Oscar comes in that day. It’s neither of the two Oscar is used to seeing who come talk to Lando pretty regularly. Oscar’s pretty sure one of them’s his boyfriend and the other is his business partner but he can never tell which is which.
“Did you leave Logan alone at the shop?” Lando is asking while Oscar sets his station up.
“Well, I had to do it at some point,” the guy says, his accent reminiscent of German or Dutch. “What is the point of hiring another employee if I cannot leave for a few minutes?"
“Daniel never leaves me alone here,” Lando points out, a tad resentful. Oscar snorts.
“That’s because he has control issues,” Oscar claims. Both of the men look at him, one in amusement and one in confusion.
“Who are you?” The mystery guy asks. Weird, Oscar was going to ask him the same thing. He looks to Lando who makes the introductions.
"Max, this is Oscar, Daniel's new apprentice. Oscar, this is Max, one of our neighbors."
Oscar frowns. "I thought Max was your..." he trails off, leaving space for Lando to fill in the blank. He waves his hand.
"Different Max. This is Max Verstappen, he run's Verstappen Floral."
The new Max is still looking at him strangely. "Daniel does not take apprentices. He says he is a bad teacher."
Oscar shrugs, not sure what to tell him. He doesn't know how he got the job either. Luckily, he's saved from having to respond by Daniel coming out of the back office.
"Oscar, good, you're here, I wanted to talk about-" Daniel stops abruptly when he sees Max standing in the lobby. His entire demeanor shifts when he says, "Max, hey! What are you doing here?"
Daniel is normally a friendly guy, sometimes too much in Oscar's opinion, but he's practically glowing as he bounds over to Max. While Max's expression doesn't shift, his body language opens up to Daniel like one of his blooming flowers.
"I am talking to Lando about our stream tonight," Max answers. "He has not been very forthcoming with the details."
Lando tries to protest but even Oscar can see that it's a lost cause. This new guy showed up and suddenly it's like nothing else exists to Daniel. His boss giggles at nothing and that's when Oscar decides to get back to work.
#my writing#wip#is it a wip? im not sure#i still have more in my head but im sleepy so here#loscar#maxiel#logan sargeant#oscar piastri#max verstappen#daniel ricciardo#lando norris#formula 1#f1 rpf#flower shop/tattoo parlor au#alternate universe
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Never wanted you to hate me
I’ve spent most of my life with the pirate hunter known as Roronoa Zoro. I owe him with my life. He saved me. Ever since then I’ve been helping him. I often will get used as bait to help with the latest bounty Zoro is hunting. But never am I ever at risk of any harm. Zoro always makes sure of that. There been a few times where he actually came close to killing a few guys that he wasn’t hunting because they either touched me or hurt me.
Now we got roped into helping this kid who is very determined on becoming king of the pirates and finding the one piece. Both Zoro and I were trying to rest while Nami was still working on getting the safe open. Unlike Luffy we are giving her space and quiet to work. We have a bet going to see how long it is before she throws him overboard. Finally I heard the sound of it clicking open. I could hear Zoro getting up. “Let me know if there is anything interesting enough for me to get up will you please.” I said. “Or I can drag you.” Zoro said. “Yeah you and I both know that you won’t.” I said. “Whatever.” Zoro said as he squeezed my hips making me laugh a little. “Hate you.” I said. “No you don’t.” Zoro said. “The night is not over yet.” I said.
I could hear Nami let out a frustration sigh. What did Luffy do now. I sat up to the three of them walking in. “The seas are divided into four quadrants. East blue, North blue, West, South. This strip of land that circles the globe is called the red line and this band across is the grand line. A treacherous stretch of ocean with bigger islands, bigger cities, bigger pirates. Flush with riches and ripe for the picking.” Nami said. “And that’s where we’re going to find the one piece.” Luffy said. “I’ve taken out a lot of pirates looking for that thing. What is it? Like a big diamond or something?” Zoro said. “It’s Gold Roger’s treasure. He hid it somewhere in the grand line. All in one piece.” Luffy said. “If you believe the story. I could say the same thing without proof you’re just going off a story.” I said. “See she gets it. It’s a myth. The reason no one’s found it in 22 years is that it doesn’t exist.” Nami said. “Can’t wait to see the look on the two of yours faces when we find it.” Luffy said. “Alright if we find it I’ll eat your hat.” I said. The look on Luffy’s face was priceless. “Kidding. I know that hat means a lot to you.” I said as an explosion went off causing me to jump a little. “Is that the marines?” Zoro asked. “How did they find us?” Nami asked. We all walked out to see a red cloud above us. “This smoke smells weird.” Luffy said. As I started to breathe in the smoke I started to get lightheaded. I leaned against the side of the ship. I fell to my knees then it all went black.
No one’s POV
The smoke was clean as the pirate clown buggy and the crew of freaks climbed onto the small ship. Three of the four people were outside while the fourth was inside. Two males and two females. Buggy walked over to one of the girls. She was laying on her side some of her hair was covering her face. Buggy bent down and gently brushed the hair from her face. “You want us to put her with the others?” One of the crew members asked. “No I have a special role for her. No one is allowed to harm her if any of you so as much pluck a hair from her head even if it’s by accident you’re dead.” Buggy said as he picked up the girl from the ground and started to carry her off the ship. He carried her onto his ship taking her to his living quarters and gently laid her down on his bed.
Buggy went to grab a special outfit that he had been saving. He went to get a female crew member to get her changed. He could be a monster but he’s not that much of a monster. But he did stand outside of the room to make sure that none of the other male crew members tried to look. It was only a few minutes later that the female crew member left. He walked back into his room and over to the girl. “I have to admit that this outfit looks cuter on you than I thought it would have.” Buggy said tracing a hand down the side of her face.
End of No One’s POV
I could feel someone poking me. “Come on now wakey wakey.” The voice said. “Luffy stop poking me.” I said swatting the hand away. “Sorry but I’m not Luffy. Now come on and open your eyes I would like to see what color eyes you have.” The voice said. I groan as I moved my head away. “Come on now I don’t want to have to get mad but I will if you don’t open your eyes.” The voice said. I opened my eyes to see a clown holding me close to him I let out a gasp as I tried to get away but he held on to my upper arms in a very tight grip. “Now don’t you have some beautiful eyes.” He said grabbing me by the chin. I looked around for the others but I couldn’t see them. “Looking for your friends. Don’t worry you’re see them in a few minutes. I just decided that you should have a special role in todays show.” He said. “If you hurt me my friend will kill you.” I said. Which only made him laugh. “Kill me. Your friend can try but they will be the one who ends up dead.” He said. At the same time I started to hear circus music. “Come on now the fans await.” He said as he started to pull me with him.
That when I glanced down and saw that I wasn’t wearing my normal clothes but now a revealing circus outfit. With this guy and how handys he’s being if Zoro gets one look at him Zoro will kill this guy if they didn’t take Zoro swords from him. I could hear the crowd yelling but it sounded off. Like they were being forced to. “Great they messed this up again. I wanted you’re first introduction to go perfect.” He said. I just forced a smile as he pulled me along with him. “No. No, no, no, no. Stop clapping! No.” He said as we started to walk in the ring. I was focusing on trying not to trip with how much my legs were shaking. “It’s all wrong.” He said stepping in the ring using one arm to pick me up by the waist. I look around to see if I could see the others and thankfully I finally could. Just like I guessed I could see the rage in Zoros eyes. Both Nami and Luffy had to put their arms out to keep Zoro from storming over. I shook my head slightly at him to let him know that now wasn’t the best time to attack. “The spotlight was late. You completely missed our entrance.” He said as he motioned for the spotlight to be put on us. It was very quickly put on us. “And where oh where was the dancing lion?” He asked as we walked over to a guy in a lion costume. Which made the guy look away in fear. “Hey I know you. I saw your wanted poster in Shells Town. You’re the clown guy. Um uh binky right?” Luff said. “Buggy. Buggy the clown. Buggy the flashy fool. Buggy the genius jester.” Buggy said as pulled me along closer to the others. “Wow. You have a lot of names. I bet everyone in the east blue knows who you are.” Luffy said. I heard everyone gasp and the hold he had on me was let go. “What did you just say?” Buggy asked. “Just that everyone knows who you are.” Luffy said again.
Buggy rushed over to Luffy grabbing him by the face. “Nose! Are you making fun of my nose?” Buggy asked. “Well I wasn’t. But now that you mention it is that thing for real?” Luffy said as he raised a hand to touch Buggy’s nose. Which Buggy was quick to slap away. “What’s real is I’ve been scheming for months to steal that map from old axe hand moron.” Buggy said pushing Luffy away. He looked to Nami to see if she caught his joke. “Only to find out that I was upstaged by four little nobodies who stole it from right under my no. No! It’s in my head now.” Buggy said letting out a groan. I put my hand to my mouth trying not to laugh. “Hey! I’m not a nobody. I’m Monkey D Luffy. And I will be king of the pirates.” Luffy said. Which made Buggy start to laugh. “Oh! Now that’s funny.” Buggy said. Which made the crowd nervous laugh again but Buggy motioned them to stop. “My bounty poster graces the marquee of every marine outpost for miles. And my menagerie of outcasts and freaks is the most dreaded pirate crew the east blue has ever known.. Expect her. I hope you don’t mind if I take her off your hands because I would like to keep her. I am destined to find the one piece. And when I do. I will be king and she will be my queen.” Buggy said as he looked at me. I could feel the tears well up in my eyes as I looked over to the others. “No you wont cause I’m gonna find it first.” Luffy said. “You? Don’t make me laugh.” Buggy said. The crowd started to laugh. “I said don’t make me laugh!” Buggy said as he turned to look at them. “Alright listen up. I’m Roronoa Zoro. Drop your weapons now, give me the girl back and I may let you live.” Zoro said as he walked closer to Buggy. Which then made Buggy grab me pulling me into him laughing. “Ladies and gentlemen we have a celebrity in our midst. Too bad I hate sharing the spotlight.” Buggy said putting his chin on my shoulder. As again the spotlight was put back on the two of us. “Now maybe we should skip right to the finale.” Buggy said pulling out four knives holding them close to my face. I tried to get away but that only worsen his grip. “My freaks put quite a bit of rehearsal time into this little abduction. And if I can’t reward them with that map I supposed I’ll have to offer them a pound of flesh instead.” Buggy said. I started to think about what he just said. I knew that the pound of flesh wouldn’t come from me since he seems dead set on keeping me.
That’s when Nami stepped up. “Wait. Wait. What if I have something else to offer you? Something more valuable than the map? What if I give you a new freak for your crew? A rare talent. The most spectacular act in all the East Blue. Beside you of course.” Nami said. “Go on.” Buggy said. Nami quickly yanked off Luffy hat throwing high in the air. Which made Luffy stretch his arm to grab it. But as Buggy was distracted his grip on me was loosened. I took that as my chance to try to get away. I tried to run to Zoro but Buggy caught my wrist pulling me back to him. “Try that again sweetheart and I’m afraid I might have to hurt.” Buggy said. “You touch her and I will kill you where you stand.” Zoro said. Buggy looked at him and laughed as he dragged me away.
“Now if I let you go do you promise to behave.” Buggy said. “Yes I promise.” I said. “Good girl.” Buggy said pinching my cheek. Buggy pulled an orange from his pocket and started peeling it with one of the knives and started to eat it. Two members of his crew dragged Nami back as she tried to escape by revealing Luffy’s powers. “What did you do to their town? You destroyed everything!” Nami said. “Not everything. I let ‘em keep their hands.” Buggy said. As the crowd clapped. “Okay. Here end the theatrics. I know one of you three has my map and I’m gonna get it back. What was it you said rubber boy? That it was in a safe place? Don’t look so surprised. I’ve got eyes and ears everywhere. So please make our guest uncomfortable in the green room.” Buggy said. I watched as Zoro and Nami were dragged away but Luffy wasn’t. “I am gonna have a chat with my stretchy new pal.” Buggy said laughing. Luffy looked over to me. “Don’t look at her. She’s not part of your crew anymore now is she.” Buggy said. “I just want to know if she is okay.” Luffy said. “She’s fine aren’t you sweetheart.” Buggy said. “I want to hear it from her.” Luffy said. I was honestly scared to answer what if Buggy hurts me if I do. I looked over to Buggy who smiled. “Well aren’t you a good girl. Looking to you’re future king for approver to answer. Go ahead.” Buggy said. “I’m okay Luffy they or Buggy haven’t hurt me.” I said. “See I told you she was fine. Now where were we.” Buggy said.
I watched as they put Luffy on a rack and made a poor town person stretch Luffy out. The more Luffy was stretched out he began to scream laugh. I wonder how far he could actually stretch guess I might find out. “I want you to think of this like an artistic exercise because pain leads to art. And art reveals truth. But there’s only one truth I need from this exercise. Where is my map.” Buggy asked as he walked over to Luffy. “Truthfully? I’m.. I’m kind of hungry. Don’t circuses have cotton candy?” Luffy asked. I let out a sigh. Not the time Luffy. Buggy laughed then let out a groan. “What could you possibly need that map for anyways? You won’t last five minutes in the grand line.” Buggy said. “I already told you. I’m gonna be king of the pir.” Luffy said. “Boring! Let’s go another ten feet.” Buggy said. The town person did as he was told. “You can stretch me all you want. I can do this all day.” Luffy said. “I’m not asking the right questions. We need to go deeper get you out of your comfort zone. What makes a boy want to grow up to be King of the pirates? Who are you trying to impress? A lost love? An absent parent? Or was it someone that you worshiped? A false idol. That’s it.” Buggy said and yanked off Luffy hat. “Hey give me back my hat!” Luffy yelled. Buggy walked over and placed Luffy hat on my head. I could see Luffy relax a little since I was now wearing his hat. “I used to know a pirate that wore a hat just like this. Red haired Shanks.” Buggy said. “You knew Shank’s?” Luffy asked. “Ginger? Three scars left eye?” Buggy asked motioning to his left eye. So they both knew the same guy. “We served together on a pirate crew when we were about your age. For a time I even thought we were friends. Until he betrayed me. Just like all the others. He wanted to keep ME out of the spotlight! He wanted to keep my star from shining too brightly! Is that what he did to you rubber boy? Did shanks betray you too?” Buggy said. “Don’t talk about him that way.” Luffy said. “Ah. Now we are finally getting to the truth. Stretch him until he breaks.” Buggy said. “Please don’t make me do this.” The town person begged. “I invite you to take part in the splendor that is my show and this is how you repay me? With a no?” Buggy said. “You’ve destroyed our town. Made us your prisoners. Isn’t that enough?” The town person said. “Well maybe you’d prefer it If I threw one of your constituents on the rank instead.” Buggy said as he walked to the crowd. No no no. Quick think of something. “Wait!” I yelled. Which made Buggy stopped. “Yes.” Buggy said as he looked at me. “Pirates like to claim their treasure right?” I said. “Go on.” Buggy said putting a hand under his chin. “You said yourself that I belong to you now therefor I’m technically your treasure right. Don’t you have to claim me so no one else can take me away from you.” I said. “I like were this is going.” Buggy said. “Then do it right now. Carve your initial on me. If I don’t make a sound then you have to promise that you won’t have any of these towns people. But if I do.” I said but couldn’t finished the last sentence. Buggy seemed to think about it for a minute. “Alright fine I agree to your terms now come here.” Buggy said motioning for me to come to him. “Y/n don’t.” Luffy said. “Shut up!” Buggy said. “It’s okay Luffy.” I said as I walked over to Buggy.
When I got over to Buggy he pulled out a knife and started lightly tracing it around my body. “Where oh where should I leave my initial. Oh I know.” Buggy has he moved the knife to my upper right breast. But before he started he kiss me right there. “Now remember sweetheart not a sound because if you don’t someone is about to get tall fast.” Buggy said. “Just do it.” I said. As Buggy carved his initial on me I bit my lip to stop me from crying out in pain. If we get out of this Zoro will definitely make his death a slow and painful one. It only took a couple of minutes before Buggy was done. “Well well sweetheart you managed to do it. But how about next I claim you in a different way.” Buggy said he put a cloth on the wound to prevent blood from getting on the outfit then putting an arm around my waist pulling me into him. “Boogie I’m warning you.” Luffy said. “It’s Buggy! And you’re warning me? Now that’s a laugh. I said that’s a laugh.” Buggy said. As the crowd forced a laugh. Then Luffy managed to free himself. As Luffy got up he glared at Buggy. “Put her down.” Luffy said. “But why? She’s having such great time. Aren’t you sweetheart?” Buggy said grabbing my face. But what he did next shocked and scared me. He kissed me on the lips. It only lasted a few seconds before he pulled away. “Yes. The best Buggy. I never want to leave you Buggy.” Buggy said trying to inmate my voice. The Luffy stretched back his arm. “Gum Gum pistol!” Luffy yelled and punched off Buggy’s head. I let out a terrified scream as I could see that there was no blood and worst of all Buggy’s body was still moving. Buggy’s head landed on a woman’s lap in the crowd which caused more screaming. “Hi. Well well well looks like we have something else in common.” Buggy said as his head returned back to his body. “You ate a devils fruit?” Luffy asked. “The chop chop fruit. So you can slice me and you dice me but I’ll always put myself back together again.” Buggy said as he stripped himself of the coat he wearing. He gently put it around my shoulders. Then I watched as he chopped himself into six different pieces then went back to normal. “Want to see what else I can do?” Buggy asked as he made a motion to his hand. His hand was gone but it tapped Luffy on the shoulder squeezing another bomb like thing that the same kind of smoke from earlier came out. His detached hand punched Luffy in the face and flipped him off. “Luffy.” I said as I tried to rush to his side but Buggy stopped me. “I don’t think so sweetheart. My crew will take care of him.” Buggy said. “What are you going to do to him?” I asked. “I’m going to put him in my tank of doom.” Buggy said.
*Meanwhile with Zoro and Nami*
“So are you and her together?” Nami asked as she was working on picking the lock on the cage she was being kept in. “No we’re not. We’re not together like that.” Zoro said. “Then what’s the deal between you two. I mean I saw the way you acted when we saw that clown had his hands on her. You were ready to kill him on sight. You might say you don’t care about her but your actions when she’s in danger say a different story.” Nami said. “I never said I don’t care about her. Don’t ever say I don’t care about her again. Just because I don’t care about her in that way doesn’t mean I will never care about her.” Zoro said. “Alright fine geez. Then what’s the story between you two?” Nami said. “She reminds me of a friend I used to know. I couldn’t save or protect my friend back then but I can do that for her.” Zoro said. “That surprisely sweet coming from you.” Nami said. “Shut up.” Zoro said. Right then the two of them heard a terrified scream coming from Y/n. Which made Zoro immediately went back to trying to break the ropes. “Hurry the hell up now.” Zoro said. “Yeah.” Nami said as she started to work quicker and picking the lock.
*Back to Y/n*
I watched as Luffy was put in a tank as water slowly filled the tank then I saw seaweed. “Is this seawater?” I asked. “Why yes it is sweetheart. You see if you eat a devil’s fruit you might gain a power like yours truly and rubber boy here but just a few splashes of seawater will take that all of that away.” Buggy said. “Oh.” I said. Come on Luffy wake back up please. I don’t want to deal with him by myself. Yes the towns people are still watching but what if he tries something their too afraid of him to stop him and I don’t know where Zoro and Nami were taken to or if anything happened to them. But I could feel him looking at me. “What?” I asked as I looked to the ground. “You’re scared of me aren’t you sweetheart.” Buggy said. “I’m not scared of you.” I said. “Then how come you won’t look at me.” Buggy said. “You kidnapped me and my friends, you destroyed these people’s town and you’re now holding them against their will. You hurt Luffy. I don’t know what you’re doing to Zoro and Nami they could be dead for all I know.” I said. “Well their not dead.” Buggy said. “How can I believe you. I haven’t got any proof that you would tell me the truth.” I said. “But you did forget to mention that.” Buggy said motioning to where the cloth was. “I did that because I didn’t want you to hurt anyone.” I said. Then I could see Luffy start to wake up. “Looks like Luffy is waking up.” I said. Buggy kissed the side of my head but I couldn’t help but smile just a little. “Do my eyes deceive me or did I see a little smile.” Buggy said. “Just go.” I said but Buggy took Luffy hat off my head taking it with him. I watched as Luffy tried to break the glass but failed. “Don’t bother. It’s seawater. Hardly seems fair. All those wonderful powers rendered useless from a few splashes. Of course you could always give me my map. If you don’t want to die alone in this tank.” Buggy said walking over to the tank and kneeled in front of it. “My crew.” Luffy said. “Your crew? You means the ones that abandoned you? Just like Shanks did. I did that make you sad?” Buggy said. “They will come back for us.” Luffy said as he looked at me. “No one’s coming for you. I already made myself clear about her. She stays with me. Your only chance is to turn over that map and if you do I may have a very special place on my crew just for you. Think about how happy she’ll be to at least have someone she already knows and she won’t have to be around all new people. Ain’t that right sweetheart.” Buggy said tossing Luffy’s hat to the side. I watched as Luffy struggled to get up as Buggy copied his movement. “Never.” Luffy said. “Why not!” Buggy yelled and hit the tank then grabbed his hand in pain. I couldn’t help but laugh.
Which made Buggy glare at me. I just smirked and flipped him off. “You’re an outcast just like the rest of us. A freak, scorned and abandoned! Join me and you can serve the man who will become the king of the pirates. When I have that map I will find the one piece and then everyone will know my name. And they’ll love me.” Buggy said but he at end he looked at me. “You can’t make people or her love you. Just like you can’t make them smile. I’ll never give you that map.” Luffy said. “Well then I guess it’s curtains for you.” Buggy said walking back over to the tank. “No wait Buggy please don’t.” I said standing in front of him. “I’m getting sick of you interfering in my show.” Buggy said as he roughly pushed me away. I landed on my side roughly making me cry out in pain. I looked and saw more water pouring into the tank at a faster rate.
Buggy walked away from the tank and went to pick up Luffy hat pulling a piece of straw from it. “Don’t touch my hat!” Luffy yelled. “What was that? I. I couldn’t hear you over all the drowning.” Buggy said. I slowly got up as I did my side started to hurt. I now saw that Luffy was under the water now. “You want out? You know the price you have to pay.” Buggy said. Luffy smiled and tapped on the glass. I turned around and saw Nami as she threw her staff towards the tank making it crack. If she was okay then Zoro is too then we can leave and I will never have to see Buggy again. The tank started to break more as Buggy looked around. “Where are my freaks!” Buggy said. Then I saw Zoro. “They’re not coming.” Zoro said. “Zoro.” I said as I ran towards him but I felt a hand grab me pulling me back. This fucking clown. “Did I say you can leave me.” Buggy said roughly yanking me around. “I don’t fucking care. I don’t want to spend a single fucking second longer near you.” I said fighting his grip. I heard the glass break and went the amount of water that came from the tank it knocked both of us off our feet. But it was seawater so it should have the same effect on Buggy.
Buggy’s grip on me loosened enough for me to get away from him. I look to see Luffy coughing up the map. I had to grabbed it before Buggy. I got up and rushed over grabbing it. But I was yanked to the ground and Buggy climbed on top of me. “Thanks sweetheart. Because you got me my map I can forgive that little outburst of yours.” Buggy said as he took the map from me. “Screw you.” I said. “Well since your friend is back to watch that sounds like a great idea.” Buggy said pulling me up from the ground. Buggy looked between me and the map laughing and then buried his face in my neck. Both Nami and Zoro walked towards us. “You want a piece of me? Let’s see what you got. You better move sweetheart I would hate for you to get hurt.” Buggy said as he let me go. I rushed over to Luffy. “Are you okay?” I asked as I helped him up. “I’ll be fine. What about you?” Luffy asked. “I just want to leave and never have to see this clown again.” I said. “No.” Luffy said quietly. I looked to see Nami and Zoro being knocked to the side as Buggy put himself back together looking towards the two of us as Luffy pushed me behind him. “Ah. Would you look at that? Somebody escaped my tank of doom. Well I’ll be back to finish you off. Right after I tear apart your sad excuse for a crew.” Buggy said laughing. “You can dump seawater on me and I’ll let it slide. But don’t you ever threaten or hurt my friends” Luffy said as he punched Buggy in the stomach causing a piece to fly off then return making Buggy wink at us. “I’ll find the map can you handle him.” I whispered to Luffy. “Go.” Luffy whispered back. I slowly made my way out from behind him as Buggy pulled out knives. “So you want die first? Be my guest.” Buggy said as he pulled himself apart. I got down until I was out of danger. “Chop chop cannon!” Buggy yelled as the pieces started to fly towards Luffy. I started to quickly look around for the map. “Hey.” A voice said quietly. I looked to see a boy point just off to the side at the map. “Thanks kid.” I said rushing over to grab it. “Nami! The crates!” Luffy yelled. I ran to the other side of the ring helping trap pieces of Buggy in crates. I smiled when I saw Zoro stab pieces of Buggy.
With help from Nami all that was left of Buggy was his feet, hands and his head. “What have you done to me?” Buggy asked. “Cut you down to size.” Luffy said. Honestly Buggy really looked funny. “The one piece will never be yours. You’re just a sad lonely little boy wearing another man’s hat!” Buggy said. “I know exactly who I am. I’m Monkey D. Luffy. And I’m going to be king of the pirates.” Luffy said stretching both arms back. I couldn’t help but smile. “Gum Gum.” Luffy yelled. “Whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa! No no no! Wait. Wait. Wait. Wait” Buggy yelled. “Bazooka!” Luffy yelled launching the rest of Buggy out of the big top.
I breathed a sigh of relief as I ran over and hugged Luffy. Luffy hugged me back. “Found the map.” I said as I handed it to him as Nami and Zoro walked over to us. I pretty much launched myself into Zoro arms as he held me close to him. “Are you okay?” Zoro said into my ear. “I will be.” I said. “Let’s get out of this clown show.” Zoro said as he let me go and started to walk me out. But stopped when Luffy put a hand on his shoulder. “Still one more thing we have to do.” Luffy said as we looked to the towns people. We start to get the people unchained. After I unchained the boy that pointed out the map he hugged me. I smiled and hugged him back.
As a thank you from preventing Buggy from harming them they managed to find me a changed of clothes so I didn’t have to wear the outfit that Buggy had me wear. They also tried to give us a little food but Luffy refused to take it. I was the first one to go back to the ship as started getting things ready to leave. I waved back to the towns people as we sailed away. I knew I should talk with Zoro about what happened to me but I wasn’t sure if I was ready yet. I sat near the front of the ship as I watched Nami fix Luffy hat. “Almost finished.” Nami said. Then she hands him his hat back. “You fixed it. Thanks.” Luffy said with a smile. “Well you said it was your treasure right?” Nami said then walked away. “Is every day gonna be this crazy with you?” Zoro asked. “Shanks always said that if the path to what you want seems too easy then you’re on the wrong path.” Luffy said. “I really like that.” I said. “This shanks guy sounds all right.” Zoro said. Luffy came over to stand on the railing of the front of the ship. “Next stop the grand line.” Luffy said as he pointed out to the open sea. I smiled as I shook my head. Zoro motioned me to come over to him. “Wish me luck Luffy.” I said as I got up. “He’s not mad with you if that’s what you’re thinking he was just really worried about you.” Luffy said. I smiled then walked over to Zoro sitting next to him.
“What to tell me how you got that.” Zoro said. “You saw that?” I asked. Zoro nodded. “He wanted to hurt one of the towns people I wasn’t going to let him do that. They were innocent Zoro. I know that you might have been okay with something like that but I’m not like you. I rather it be me that got hurt before one of them.” I said. “It was still a very stupid thing for you to do.” Zoro said. “He kissed me too.” I said. “I’m definitely killing that fucking clown next time I see him.” Zoro said. I laughed and put my head on his shoulder. “Did you he do anything else to you. I heard you scream.” Zoro said. “Oh that was when we saw that he has similar powers to Luffy. He punched off his head while he still had a grip on me but I didn’t get hurt.” I said. “Not going to lie it was creepy seeing it for the first time. Anything else?” Zoro said. I bit my lip as tears filled my eyes. “What is it? You know that what ever it is that I will never be upset or angry at you.” Zoro said. “I know. After he craved his initial on me he said wanted to claim me in that way.” I said as could feel him tense up. Then he went quiet. “Please don’t go quiet on me. You know I hate when you do that.” I said as I picked my head up to look at him. “I promise to you that next time we see that clown I will kill him.” Zoro said. I threw my arms around his shoulders as I buried my face in next as I started to cry. “It’s okay I got you. You’re safe.” Zoro said as he held me close to him holding me as I cried.
For the rest of the day Zoro didn’t want me to leave his sight even though we on the ship and couldn’t really go anywhere. “You should try to get some rest.” Zoro said. “I’m okay right now.” I said. “I wasn’t asking.” Zoro said. “Alright fine I’m going.” I said as I got up going inside laying down. I closed my eyes and tried to get some sleep. I tossed and turned for what seems like forever before I finally managed to fall asleep.
#buggy the clown imagine#buggy x reader#buggy imagine#opla buggy imagine#opla buggy x reader#opla buggy#kelsee's works#do not reblog unless it's from me
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