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nomazee · 4 years

Text

Slow

ushijima wakatoshi x reader

word count: 3400+

content: soulmate au (matching soulmarks), developing relationship, mild angst, ushijima is just Very Clueless sometimes, weird pacing (i can never get the pacing of my writing right :/ )

(hi hi hi!! here’s the ushijima oneshot i mentioned a few days ago. this was something i started working on a while ago but dropped it momentarily to focus on some other stuff. i ended up rewriting it completely and renewing the concept a bit.

this is sort of a different writing style? but that’s mainly because i wanted to adjust the way i wrote to the way the reader’s thoughts came through. i hope that makes sense? and i hope this is still readable!!

i really hope you guys like this one. while soulmate aus aren’t my most favorite trope, i definitely like the way you can twist it to fit your story and make up new concepts branching from the main idea of soulmates.

i think this is the longest work i’ve made?? i’m definitely pretty proud of it!! i hope my hard work paid off and you all enjoy it :)

ALSO: a very quick note. i use the word “furoshiki” a few times in one part of the story to refer to the cloth that people use to wrap bento boxes. if i misused that term please let me know!! i looked it up to make sure i was using the right word but there’s definitely still a chance that i could be wrong. feel free to correct me on that!!

by the way: i’m posting this from my phone right now so the formatting might not all be there. i’m very sorry about that!! once i get the chance to go back on my laptop i’ll make sure to fix everything :)

happy reading !!)

☾.:°∗★.:☆:.★∗°:.☽

It was common knowledge among those in the Shiratorizawa Volleyball Club that their captain, Ushijima Wakatoshi, prioritized volleyball over nearly everything else.

Even relationships. Even soulmates.

His friend Tendou had laughed mirthlessly when Ushijima first met you, his soulmate. He was there to witness the whole thing, your eyes flitting between the ace’s soulmark trailed beautifully against his wrist and the same mark mirrored on your forearm. You looked enthused to meet him--not overly, hopping-off-the-walls ecstatic, but certainly hopeful enough to elicit a wide smile from you.

“I’m [Last] [First],” you introduced yourself politely, with light hesitance and an extended hand.

Ushijima blinked, looked down at your hand (soft, a red and scabbed cut on your first knuckle, a birthmark on the bony part of your wrist) and then back up at your eyes. He returned the gesture, shaking your hand, giving a polite bow--

--and walking right away.

You blinked in shock. Tendou’s mouth parted in disbelief. His head swung back and he called after Ushijima to no avail. Turning back to you, he gave a short apology and ran after his friend to scold (and tease) him.

Your mind went a bit hazy and in a natural defense mechanism, you tried to convince yourself that you were just dreaming.

You went home. Fell into your bed. Realized you were not dreaming. Cried into your pillow and fell asleep, begrudgingly waking up the next morning and getting ready for school.

---

During lunch, you stayed in your classroom to eat lunch alone when someone at the door told you a boy was looking for you. (You felt a bit pathetic for hoping that it was your soulmate and being disappointed when you realized it was not him.)

You recognized the boy as the redhead that accompanied your soulmate yesterday. Flinching at the memory, you asked him why he was here.

“I just wanted to say sorry, for the way my friend acted yesterday.” His expression was lighthearted and playful, if anything, but you recognized the sincerity of his words. “He tends to be a little… aloof, sometimes. But I promise you it’s not that he hates you or anything, just isn’t used to this. But he’s willing to talk to you again.”

You tried not to get your hopes up too much, and instead look at the reasonable outcomes of this whole soulmate thing. It’s not like you were really expecting love at first sight--lots of soulmates didn’t end up in a romantic relationship. Hell, your parents weren’t even soulmates but they were still very in love with each other. But at the very least, you thought your soulmate wouldn’t just walk away after meeting you.

You took the redhead’s offer, packed up your half-eaten bento, and followed him to his own classroom a few doors down.

Your soulmate was there--you still didn’t know his name--and his head perked up at the sound of the sliding door opening. His expression was stagnant, which dampered your spirits the slightest bit and made you consider spinning on your heel and locking yourself in the bathroom for the rest of the school day.

You sat with the two of them, knees clenched together and gaze focused solely on the bento box resting on your lap. None of you spoke. Tendou’s eyes flitted between the both of you in expectance.

“So,” he spoke up, thankfully breaking the bout of stifling silence. “[Name], you wanna tell us a little about yourself? We don't really know much about you outside of… the very little we learned yesterday, so…?”

Your mouth gaped and closed rapidly, trying to find a good way to describe yourself without either seeming like an interviewee or a self-absorbed rando.

“I’m… [Name]. I’m seventeen… in class one. I’m in the photography club.” There wasn’t much else to say, you thought. You were a very normal person. Maybe too normal to really be worthy of having a close bond with your soulmate, but a small part of you still sort of hoped.

“Wakatoshi, your turn.”

The taller boy blinked into his bento (hayashi rice, you noted. Something you were able to cook, if you tried hard enough) before speaking. His voice was deep and embarrassingly, you flushed at the way it rumbled within his throat.

“I’m the captain of the volleyball team.”

Okay. So. No age. No name (except for ‘Wakatoshi,’ which you only pulled from what Tendou said). Just his club.

With a lump in your throat and a prickly feeling behind your eyes, you excused yourself politely, bowing, and clutching tightly to your star-wrapped bento before leaving the classroom.

You went home. Punched your pillow before realizing you were definitely not one for using aggression as a coping mechanism and instead crying while making a cup of tea. Went to bed and woke up the next morning trying to forget all of the events of the past two days.

---

A week passed. Somewhere within that time, Tendou had exchanged numbers with you as a polite formality, a deeper meaning ingrained in his offer (one that you read as, “hey, I know it must be really disappointing to realize that your soulmate has absolutely no clue what romance is and no ambition for anything but hitting a volleyball, but if you ever wanna talk about it then hit me up!” You couldn’t deny that you still appreciated it).

You took the week to avoid interacting with Wa-ka-to-shi, never texting Tendou and asking to eat lunch with them or even showing up at his practice like some of their fans did (you were a bit surprised to learn that the volleyball team had fans). But you had a breaking point, as you often did whenever it came to your faux-shunning.

You texted Tendou, hoping that you weren’t that unlucky that he was still at volleyball practice and had his phone out for the captain to view.

does he like hayashi rice?

“Read” appeared under your text. You waited for the three dots to appear, which took an unnervingly long time to happen.

yup! how’d u know??

he was eating it when i had lunch with you guys.

ur observant!!

i guess. do you guys have morning practice tomorrow?

yup! starts at 7. fourth gym :) see you there!!

You paused. Tendou was nice. Also very observant. Scarily observant, enough to catch onto what you were trying to do. It made you a bit wary, but to be fair, you weren’t really being discreet in the first place.

Your mother asked you multiple times why you were cooking beef stew at nine PM, far past dinnertime. You were scared to admit that it was for a soulmate, so you instead settled for “friend” and she (very suspiciously) let you be in the kitchen.

You packed the food into four bento boxes. One for your mom, your dad, Wa-ka-to-shi, and you. (You couldn’t help the annunciation of each syllable of his name. It was just so fun to say, so fun to click against the back of your tongue repeatedly. You blamed the affinity for his name on your soulmate bond.)

You went to bed. Woke up extra early. Disregarded the concerned look your parents gave you when you left the house half an hour early with two bentos in hand.

Just as Tendou said, there was the squeaking of the volleyball team from within Gym Number Four. You hovered outside, a text sent to Tendou asking if you were allowed to come in as you awkwardly shifted the weight on your feet.

yup!! we’re taking a break right now. just come right in, i’ll be waiting for u at the door

He was waiting for you at the door, but so was Wakatoshi (you figured you should drop the somewhat-annoying pronunciation of each letter), which threw you into a stammering loop as you blinked between the both of them.

“Good morning.” Wakatoshi greeted you politely, nodding his head at you. You repeated the gesture before extending a bento box to him, with your favorite star cloth wrapping it in the neatest way you could manage.

“It’s for you. For lunch. Or dinner. Or whenever. It’s hay-- um, hayashi rice.”

Wakatoshi didn’t take it. You cringed at the lack of action and a familiar lump manifested in your throat. The stoic boy blinked down at the childish wrap and you found yourself wishing you took a solid colored furoshiki instead of this one.

In a moment of boldness, you shoved the box into his chest where he instinctively reached for it and held it.

“I hope you like it!” You said it louder than intended and flinched at the sudden gazes on you from the other members of the team further into the gym. “Have a good day.”

A polite bow, and you were on your way, cursing yourself for taking the effort to make a decent-quality meal for a soulmate, a boy who barely even glanced at you without his friend giving him the hint to do so.

During lunch, you didn’t feel hungry, and the bento sat untouched on your desk for the whole break. You ended up letting your parents have the leftovers when you got home. Your appetite was gone for the rest of the day.

(Tendou ended up bringing you back your box and cloth the next day, wordlessly apologizing for having to be the messenger of your belongings rather than the person you actually gifted it to in the first place. You took it back with a resigned sigh and a thankful smile.)

---

The morning you stopped by, Tendou rolled his eyes after your departure and he gave his friend a firm, but friendly pat on the back.

“Why are you so awkward, Wakatoshi? That’s your soulmate, you know. You could at least be a little courteous towards her?”

Said man stayed silent, still leering at the patterned furoshiki covering the lunch you made for him--specifically him; the concept sent an unfamiliar fluttering through his chest that he didn’t dare to look into.

“Why would she make this for me?”

Tendou rolled his eyes again, letting out an audible groan.

“I just explained it to you, ‘Toshi! She likes you. You’re her soulmate. You could at least tell her thank you.”

“I will, next time.”

Tendou’s eyes narrowed at that. You seemed like a spontaneous person, from the few interactions you’d had with each other. (That, and the fact that after a week of ghosting your own soulmate you suddenly decided to make an entirely specialized lunch for him.) He wanted to half-joke and say ‘I don’t really know when the next time will be, exactly,’ but figured that may lead into another Q & A With Ushijima Wakatoshi, and instead let the captain simmer in his own contemplation for now.

---

You didn’t know Semi Eita very well. He was in your class, and you chatted a fairly reasonable amount with him, even going as far as to sit and eat with him in the classroom whenever he claimed he was “too tired to deal with his friends in the cafeteria.” As much of a “friend” of his you could be considered, you didn’t know much of him past what he was on the surface.

Nevertheless, you still knew him better than your soulmate. And that petty realization may have contributed to why you accepted his offer for a cafe date.

Semi approached you during lunch one day, not embarrassed in the slightest when he asked you if you wanted to go to a new cafe with him on Friday. “It can be a date, if you want,” he’d told you, eyes flitting to the side momentarily before meeting yours again. “But it doesn't have to be. We can just hang out.”

A bit flustered, you still accepted his offer, figuring a day out wouldn’t do much harm. He smiled at your response, asking you to meet him at his gym after his volleyball practice ended.

You didn’t think much of it. He certainly didn’t pressure you into assuming it was a date, and if you didn’t like it then you could just turn him down for a second date and move on with your single life.

On Friday afternoon, at five PM like he specified over text, you walked into the doorway of the gym, hovering and watching some of the boys clean up any spare equipment left in the gym. You couldn’t spot Semi anywhere, and moved to back away from the door when a familiar voice stopped you.

“[Name].” The sound of your first name coming from the rumble of your voice unwillingly sent shivers through your spine and you chastised yourself for the reaction.

You looked at him, and there he was--sweaty, all dark-hair and olive-eyes and you hated how flustered you got.

You gave him a polite nod and forced your lips into a smile. Despite you not responding verbally, he (uncharacteristically) led the conversation.

“It’s nice to see you here.” The words felt forced, almost rehearsed on his lips, and you couldn’t help the cock of your head in curiosity at that. “The food you made me last time was very good.” A pause, and his eyes turned to the polish wood floor. “Are you here to bring another gift?”

Wakatoshi was straightforward with his question, and at the unfamiliar aloofness you found your ears turning warm and fingers grasping at each other in habit.

“No, um-- I’m actually here to see… someone.”

“...someone?”

“Yeah. Someone.” You didn’t feel like elaborating, and by some sheer luck that you mentally praised the gods for, Semi jogged to your side, changed into his school uniform and a kind smile crossing his face.

“Hey.” He greeted you, turning up to his captain in confusion before focusing on you again. “Ready to go?”

Your eyes were forced off of Wakatoshi’s, and you returned Semi’s expression with a nod. You refused to look the captain in his eyes again, and instead focused on making sure you didn’t trip on the sidewalk while walking with Semi.

---

The date-- hang out-- outing-- whatever you wanted to call it went nicely. You both had pleasant, lighthearted, not-forced conversation over very good coffee and you found it enjoyable.

By the end of the night, while Semi walked you back home, you figured you had to address what you were a bit nervous to address in the first place. After explaining your hesitancy towards calling your hang-outs “dates,” Semi ultimately brushed it off, a smile on his face as he told you he really didn’t care too much and would enjoy just being a friend to you.

You were relieved. A quiet voice deep inside your head told you to not let this poor boy get hopeful when you were still trying to settle things with (read: get over) your soulmate. Regardless of secondhand reasoning, you were thankful he was understanding and also thankful he was willing to be a friend.

---

You found yourself eating lunch with Semi a bit more often than before. It was nice to have someone else’s presence near you while you ate rather than having to sit alone and people-watch through the window of the classroom.

You were startled when Wakatoshi appeared in the doorway of your classroom while in the midst of a conversation with Semi. Noticing your mildly dumbfounded expression, Semi turned around to see where you were looking and looked confusedly at the form of his fellow teammate.

Wakatoshi nodded at him, turned to you, and gave a wave and a very, very subtle upturn of his lips. (Despite the subtlety of the gesture, you had to suppress a gasp that threatened to break past the back of your throat.)

He didn’t make a move to approach you, so you took the opportunity to walk up to him and meet him at the door, unintentionally avoiding the questions Semi shot at you in confusion.

“Hi,” you greeted stiffly. “Do you need something?”

“No. Yes.” Wakatoshi paused, collecting his thoughts. “I was wondering if you wanted to eat lunch with me.”

It was an unexpected offer, one you deemed uncharacteristic coming from the aloof boy. You let your mind overprocess it before cutting off your overthinking and giving him a proper response.

“I’m eating lunch with Semi today. But maybe tomorrow, if you still want to.”

A foreign look of confusion appeared on his face, his brows furrowed together and head tilting slightly to the side. “Are you dating Semi?”

Wow. Okay. Very straightforward. Very sudden. You certainly were not dating Semi, and you didn’t know how he managed to draw that conclusion after seeing you and Semi interact a total of two times in his presence.

“I’m not…? Why are you so worried about that?”

“Because we’re soulmates.”

Your stomach churned in a mix of emotions. You didn’t know how to describe your feelings--it was an ugly mesh of annoyed, angry, confused, and on-the-verge-of-tears. You found it a bit funny that only now he was acknowledging your soulmate bond. It made the prickling sensation behind your eyes only increase in intensity.

“Right. Um, you… you didn’t really do much about that before.” You tried not to call out word-for-word what he did, but figured a jab at it wouldn’t send you into guiltily reflecting on your past actions while in the shower at midnight.

He was silent, avoiding your gaze and finding interest in the cracked wood of the door. Before your subconscious forced you to apologize, you gave a polite farewell and slid the door halfway shut before returning to your seat.

Semi stared at you incredulously. “Are you…?”

“I don’t know, man.” Despite the sudden lack of appetite (yet again! You really were not good at any form of confrontation), you forced yourself to nibble on your food and pushed down the uncomfortable feeling in your stomach.

---

Wakatoshi made a point to run into at any time he saw fit, which was very often. He’d find ways to catch you in the morning and say hi, and always invited you to eat lunch with him in his classroom. Out of courtesy, you often accepted his offer, feeling a bit surprised (and wary) when Tendou didn’t appear to accompany the both of you. Those lunch periods were spent in jarring silence, Wakatoshi slowly eating his food (cutely, you noted before burning that thought into the fiery recesses of hell in your mind) and you eating yours while sweating and hoping that you didn’t look weird when you chewed.

This routine kept going on for a solid week. You didn’t know what to expect anymore. Other than the lunch invitations and morning small talk, he didn’t make any outstanding gestures towards you to try to get closer. You didn’t know if that was good or bad.

One day, during lunch when you’d hesitantly accepted yet another offer to eat with him (ignoring Semi’s teasing look when you left the classroom), he made another strange offer, diverting from the usual discussions of weather, clubs, and schoolwork.

“I have a game soon.” He started off. “I’d like you to come watch.”

You paused, staring into your rice in an empty hope that it’d give you a clue on how to respond.

“It’s on Saturday. At twelve. The gymnasium isn’t too far from here. I’d like to take you to dinner afterwards.”

Oh. Oh. That was unexpected. And you were expecting the unexpected. Then again, maybe you should’ve figured that eventually he may have made some sort of move after waiting a week with bated breath.

Your lips parted, but no noise escaped. You wanted to accept, definitely, but you also wanted to be a little aware of his intentions.

“Um…” You floundered a little bit, “I’ll see if I can make it. But… um, dinner?”

“Yes.” Though his voice was steady and deep as always, you sensed hesitance in the way his eyes shifted away from yours and into his lunch. “A date.”

It was a relief to hear him just say it rather than beating around the bush. You cleared your throat in habit and scratched the skin of your thumb.

“Oh. Okay. That would… be nice.”

He smiled. It wasn’t the occasional tilt of his lips, it was a smile. Stretched lips, crinkled eyes and all. You lost your breath at the sight and a soundless laugh escaped your lips.

“Yes. I think so too.”

It was a slow start. It would take some getting used to. But you were both willing to guide each other, slow and steady.

#haikyuu #hq #haikyuu fanfiction #hq fanfiction #ushijima wakatoshi #wakatoshi ushijima #ushijima #wakatoshi #ushijima wakatoshi x reader #wakatoshi ushijima x reader #ushijima x reader #wakatoshi x reader #haikyuu x reader #hq x reader

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lovenona · 2 years

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HOLY FUCKING SHIT ADELE IM LIKE CRYING. Like oh my god I looked forward for so long to this reunion and you went above my expectations and then PH MY GPS LIKE I CANNOT GET OVER THIS CRUSHING WEIGHT I FEEL. The two star crossed lovers meeting again but their reunion is nothing like the myths or the legends. Just oh my god okay I don’t even know where to begin I was literally yelling the entire time I was reading this new chapter! (1/4)

The parable of the cave. CHOSO god I love him so much 🥰🥰 but okay the whole dream Sequence- geto being the moon and sukuna being the sun- god your mind!!!! At first I know for a fact 💯 that toji is suppose to be the 4th son coming to bring it all down. Or at least I thought so until we get to part 8. And god the way you write angst literally leaves me with a pit in my chest and the urge to yell at both of these characters. (2/4)

God this chapter left me spiraling. I love the way you portray the readers / tojis relationship. It feels as if it was doomed for the start- with toji thinking too big for the dreams he had had reader not thinking big enough. In a way there’s a balance but right now toji is not himself and cannot be the balance that the reader needs. Again you blew me away I can’t believe the odyssey is almost over 😔 Like this chapter left me speechless I feel as though my brain is scrambling to make sense of all the things toji has been though, the unresolved anguish the reader feels about him and the impending doom that is this new captain! I’m most definitely gonna do a little rereading to look over what I missed cause I could not put my phone down. -🥸

[SOBBING AND CRYING] THANK U 😭 i am not exaggerating when i say i am always looking forward to ur hot takes whenever i update and u never disappoint 😭 i was looking forward to writing this reunion from the moment mahito was like Hey in part 2 and GODDDDD i wish i cld keep writing it there was so much stuff i wanted to add that didn’t make it in (read: toji and mc go ‘hunting for boars’ one night, mc and toji staring longingly at each other as they walk on the beach, mc and toji at the old woman’s stall, etc. etc. etc) but i am obsessed with the vibes of their tragic past and their sort of doomed romance and whatever so what can u do (unsolicited odyssey music: the song i played 500 times (no joke) to manifest the flashbacks)

(also CHOSO....i mf love interlude 3 but let me tell u it took me like 10 years to write it because i wrote it, hated it, went on hiatus, and then rewrote completely differently later KSGJSG....but the line in part 8 when u go onto the ship that was like ‘even sound doesn’t echo off the walls’ or whatever was a line from my shitty version of interlude 3 RIP)

as for ur delightful guesswork i cannot confirm or deny anything in the spirit of leaving u all on ur toes but i really like the big brain activity going on here !!!!! we will eventually find out the answers to most of those things tho so sit tight 😌 (i decided not to publish that ask because some of it is pretty darn close so don’t tell SKGJSGS but also i feel that some of it is quite obvious RIP)

and god i know....i am genuinely distraught that there r only 2 big parts left...granted they will both be long as fuck but STILL i have no idea what I'm going to do with myself when it’s all done 😭 this and this r the themes for part 9 tho and let me tell u it will genuinely crush my soul to have to write down what is going to be written every day i ask my brain why we r about to do what i have planned <//3

but anyway thank u for letting me ramble and THANK U SO MUCH FOR ALL UR INPUT AND BIG BRAIN THEORIES 😭 i've been rereading these all weekend it makes my heart SO HAPPY I HOPE U HAVE THE BEST DAY EVER

#[sobs and cries and throws up]#I LOVE UUUUUU #THESE R SO NICE IM CRYING IN THE CLUB #THANK U SO MUCH #IT'S THE SHIT LIKE THIS THAT KEEPS ME UPDATING THIS BEHEMOTH #<3 #CRYING THANK U #letters to adele #the odyssey!#LRE anon #still on desktop so there is No Emoji [sobs]

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theunconcernedembalmer · 3 years

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what’s the issue with elisop? is it just bc you hc aesop as ace? im so concerned by seeing ppl adamantly opposed to mlm/wlw ships but im also genuinely curious about why you dislike it and other lgbt ships so much lol

hmm. that is a strong accusation, n i find it just a bit odd. are you new here? or perhaps you are taking personal offense at my dislike towards a favourite ship of yours and using the lgbt argument as moral high ground?

whatever the case may be, i thank you for asking. if u r truly looking for an answer, its below the cut n it is very very long. mind u these are all my personal opinions n i am in no way policing how others enjoy ships. just in case this wasnt clear; i dont wish to start discourse on this blog, especially since my takes are probably... unpopular.

firstly i would like to address the “disliking lgbt ships” bit, because this has very strong implications in itself. i have nothing against lgbt ships. i enjoy them, even. if the two characters have chemistry between each other, i ship it. however, the moment characterization is broken for the sake of romance, i lose interest. this is generally my stance on ships in general, n this applies for both straight n lgbt ships.

the ships themselves are fine. however, i do have issues with the ship dynamics, so ill let u in on that.

i want to touch on mlm ships in particular; i believe u are familiar with the top/bottom dynamic that is rampant in these kinds of ships? (i wont deny that this dynamic can be found in other types of ships, but for arguments sake i will be focusing on gay ships because i feel that this occurs more commonly here) its such a popular dynamic that is prone to stripping the personality from one if not both characters, only for them to be reduced to being dominant/submissive. for a character to be pigeonholed into a stereotypical category based on... preferred sexual positions? its just downright insulting, never mind the larger more problematic implications of it. top/bottom is not indicative of someones personality, by the way. flattening multi dimensional characters into these stereotypes is so so so insulting.

unfortunately this is The Most Popular portrayal of just about any gay ship around. ive seen it being used everywhere in so many fandoms n it just about becomes apparent to me that ppl come to stories looking for a Ship. not the stories, nor the characters, just a ship. while id like to say theres nothing wrong with that, keep in mind not everyone is just looking for 2 characters that look pretty next to each other. if i ship something, i see interesting n meaningful interactions between 2 characters, which is so often not the case once u bring in the top/bottom dynamic. why is it so popular? because somehow this is what ppl like from a gay ship n hence it sells. ppl want the drama, characterizations be damned. ppl want to see the big kiss that happens in the end, n maybe the sexy parts that come after. characterizations be damned.

so u can say im a little wary of gay ships when they cross my feed. hell, as a joseph aesop shipper i see this trope everywhere n im pretty disappointed as well. small tangent but i feel like this is the reason why zh0ngli n ch1lde is so popular in g3nshin. i try to see the appeal, i really do, but after a long while of analyzing their respective characters i dont think they have as much chemistry as ppl think they do. dont even get me started on how incredibly ooc they make either of these very interesting n unique characters in ship portrayals. all because of the top/bottom dynamic that ppl want to see. i say this for that particular ship, but this is pretty much the case for a lot of ships out there, n the latter part is painfully true even when the 2 characters do have potential between each other. ill say it again im disgusted by the blatant disrespect to the characterizations if all ppl ever want is 2 pretty puppets to mush lips together. cos thats what theyre essentially reduced to this way.

n its so obvious to see when an artist subscribes to this rhetoric, because u can so clearly see it in the way they draw their characters. the “top” generally has sharper features to go with their “dominating personality”, while the “bottom” has disturbingly softer, feminine, dare i say sometimes child like features “to submit”. n thats where the uwu soft gay trope comes from, i believe. which, in case u still dont know, i hate with a burning passion.

so again for ppl with impaired reading comprehension, im fine with ships, including lgbt ones, but the moment u break characterization for the sake of the ship, im not that okay with it. u want to do it for a short crack comic? fine. but if thats the only way ur portraying the 2 characters then im immediately wary of ur content. ill still look at it cos usually the art is really good, but im very very wary. so im not “adamantly opposed”, just very critical of how the ships are being portrayed. if other ppl want to enjoy their ships like that, sure. just dont expect me to join in on something i dont agree on.

now id like to address not shipping “because i hc aesop as ace”. for ppl who are new to the blog (hello there), im an ace in a romantic relationship, so thats definitely not the reason i dont ship elisop. its more of being in a relationship has largely shaped my views towards romance as a whole. even before i met my boyfriend, i hated the romance genre in stories n media. most of it comes off as incredibly forced, especially those love triangles they seem to love putting into teen novels. thats one reason why i stopped reading when i was younger, but i digress.

did i partake in shipping when i was younger? i did. for a gay ship too (if anyone really wants to know, its kurotsukki from haikyuu. at least this was one that i can remember, i was mostly working on my 20 odd ocs for the longest time). i also used to write little short romance ficlets that i never posted anywhere cos i hated (n still do hate) my writing. but writing romance when u dont have experience was really just a way of projecting n probably a way of coping for myself, not that i knew at that time. but after i actually started a relationship with my boyfriend (whom i love n cherish a lot thank u very much), i began to see how much all these have skewed my views towards romance n have actually done some harm to our relationship. the bullshit that the general media feeds u constantly doesnt help in the slightest either.

quick topic shift to elisop in particular (about time, right?). i already stated that i only ship characters if i sense chemistry between the two personalities, n if u have seen the part where i dont ship elisop then u must have seen how agonized i am over not being able to have a concrete personality for eli. that is the main problem i have with elisop: eli does not feel like a solid character to me. n that is a huge problem, because if he doesnt have any defining characteristics besides being mild n nice, then he can be whoever i want him to be. (i have done this in my exorcist comics, i will admit this. n the fact that i can just do that... it really does not sit well with me personally.)

n that is dangerous.

back to young me doing lil ship things. i think its also pretty safe to say when u really do ship 2 characters, chances are u kinda really relate very very hard to at least one of them. that very quickly can turn into projecting, n shipping therefore is not “exploring the relationship between 2 characters” n it becomes “my preferred dating simulator 101″. of course this isnt always the case, but at least it was for me, n subconsciously it might be for lots of ppl too. n since this is ur mental playground, u call the shots, n there is no consequences if u slightly (or even entirely) alter one or both personalities to fit ur desired narrative. n u wouldnt even notice or know, cos ur blind to ur own biasness.

we bring our perceived notions into real life, im sure u know that. so when ur partner does not become that perfect knight in shining armour, or when they get upset at things that u do (which is a very normal thing by the way), n u think (very subconsciously), That isnt what my otp would do, something is wrong here (nothing is wrong, actually its just ur skewed perception of a stable romantic relationship). why wouldnt ur otp do this? because u are both halves of ur otps, there is no hidden secrets between them (apart from the pining part but thats irrelevant), n again they have been altered to fit ur preferred narrative.

a real relationship requires a lot of communication between parties, because newsflash, liking someone doesnt mean that u have to like every single thing they do, they will make mistakes n it will hurt u, n guess what, the reverse is also true. if u do go with absoutely anything that they would do with 0 objections whatsoever, ur not crushing on someone, ur idolizing them, n that power imbalance is detrimental to a relationship. these things are not obvious to ppl, especially when the whole climate is hell bent on getting into romantic relationships by a certain age or some bullshit. communication is key n is pretty much the only way to solve relationship issues, because the other person has a lot that u r not seeing n vice versa. as similar as 2 ppl can be, i doubt u can have 100% the same thoughts on all things. i dont make the rules.

so in ur mental playground u focus on the fluffy parts, maybe there is communication, but rarely is there any meaningful conflict. thats unrealistic, n if u bring that mindset to an actual relationship, thats not going to end well. i say meaningful conflict, because yes, generally u shouldnt have conflicts with ur significant other. but inevitably when ur with each other for long enough, u will realize that there are habits that u must change in order to be with the other person. habits that are harmful to the other person directly, or harmful habits towards yourself that indirectly harm the other person. these are meaningful in a sense that if left alone, it will manifest into larger problems that will harm u, the other person n the relationship as a whole. its meaningful to the relationship.

all these is made even worse if ur neurodivergent. maladaptive coping practices, self sabotaging behaviours, inherent disabilities. all these must be adjusted n addressed. im so incredibly thankful for my boyfriend for being incredibly patient with me when working all these out, n it has not been easy for me to work on myself n all my problems, n im still not done working on them. this aspect is often not explored in romance in general (or properly), n there is a very good chance i would have still been stuck in the unhealthy mindset of “this isnt like my otp, maybe we’re not meant to be”. because loving someone is a choice. no one is made for each other, it is a conscious choice made between 2 ppl to make things work. this is how arranged marriages work, i am told, n i do see the appeal, not that it actually does appeal to me culturally.

special mention to the kurotsukki ship, cos from there i found a very, very good fic that explored their relationship before n after getting together, n it actually showed aspects of this problem in the incredibly slow burn of (at that time) 20+ chapters. it was just one fic (n a very good one at that, i believe it was called Leviticus), but it had a lesson i never thought i needed to learn, n learn it i did, with a lot of help from my dear.

this is also probably the reason why i dont really want to delve too much into romance now. i know its a lot of work, n everything (mostly) that the media feeds u is really false advertising, but ppl eat that shit up n so it remains one of the most popular genres to date. im just very wary that if i do start on a romantic story, i want to be able to show it in a way like that fic did, the truths of relationships, because i dont want to make something that sells, i want to make something that meaningful to me, if a little indulgent. n that also includes being very careful in how the respective characterizations will change in a relationship. almost too careful now that i think about it, but its not something that i mind. i was never one for romance from the start, n now im very careful about shipping because of what happened to me persoanlly.

okay enough about me, lets talk about aesop. in any au u put the character in, the essence of the character must remain despite the change in environment. so lets say we have ur typical modern au. dead mom, check. shitty mentor doing illegal stuff? also check. autistic boy with social anxiety? we’re good to go. all these have implications on aesop as a character, n while ppl are aware of this, again the way they go about portraying it can go, in my personal opinion, very wrong. ppl who immediately woobify aesop completely because he has autism annoy me. ppl who reduce him to uwu soft boi cos he has social anxiety do not know how the disorder really works n as someone who has that i hate it to the core. ppl who do all these for the sake of ship have lost my respect. its insulting.

remember the top/bottom dynamic? not that elisop is completely free from that (even if i dont know much about eli, to put him in either one of those stereotypes feels very insulting to his character. i wont even say anything about doing it to aesop its so upsetting), but its not entirely made up of either. but now i want to introduce another trope i am very wary of, which is “i can fix him”. im sure u guys have seen the meme going around poking fun at this trope (for those who havent, its along the lines of “u can fix him? well i can be his worst nightmare”) n no doubt yall would have seen it n gotten sick of it in some forced hetero romantic bullshit. we have one damsel in distress with a saviour that solves all their problems just by existing n being romo with each other.

remember “my preferred dating simulator 101″? this is not mutually exclusive n from my point of view this is dangerously close to this trope. lets be real, if it was actually a thing that all ur deep rooted trauma magically disappears if someone were to waltz into ur life, we would want it. definitely. no painfully dissecting ur own problems n constantly facing them head on. real life states that this is not the case, but it will not stop us from dreaming. n so this trope is born n lives n will go on.

(finally) pulling aesop n eli into this, at least in my mind, u have one severely traumatized boy with lots of issues n u have this. nice mild guy who can be anything u want him to be. i hope u can see where im going with this, n thats the direction i see some elisop heading towards (i dont read a lot of elisop to be fair). if u came from my eli character talk, i mentioned that it is incredibly one sided. this is exactly what im talking about.

putting it all together in case u havent already, aesop is the damsel in distress, whose problems magically disappear because of elis godly kindness n little to no work on improving himself, n they lived happily n gayly ever after.

can u tell how much that does not appeal to me.

never mind the butchering of character that inevitably happens somewhere somehow, the unrealistically perfect themes n implications of this trope makes me so viscerally uncomfortable. this is, of course, due to personal reasons, n i definitely see the appeal of this dynamic because i would probably have been interested in this once upon a time as well. but as i am now, with everything i have explained up there n everything i have been through, i would politely rather not.

n its difficult to think of another dynamic, because of how little i know about eli apart from him being this saint, which easily makes him a candidate for being aesops trauma panacea. never mind aesop rarely, if ever, does anything for eli as a character in return, n its so damaging to buy into this rhetoric, where a person like this who would solve all ur issues no strings attached exists somewhere in the world. they really dont. a relationship has to be mutually benefitting, or it will be draining n disastrous. maybe u say, Oh its nice to imagine it once in a while. n yeah, i agree, except once in a while is a little difficult to keep track of n that is sort of what happened to me. id rather stay as far away as possible from this kind of unrealistic fantasy, i just got this shit sorted out with myself n my boyfriend.

i have some other reasons, but theyre more personally problematic, so i wont go into them here. but this is mostly n generally why i do not ship elisop romantically. if u do, u do u, and have fun, but again dont expect me to join u. thank u for coming to my ted talk, this took a lot longer than expected.

#mun rambles #its me the mun #unconcerned ramblings #posting this now cos this is a question ive been getting #although this has been worded in the most unnecessarily passive aggressive way possible that i do not appreciate #im wary about all u so called social justice warriors championing this n that liberal idea when all u want to do is stir shit #thankfully i dont have much experience with this but just passively seeing all these ppl run their mouths is getting very annoying #but just know that i will not tolerate any of that bullshit here. because if u really do care about ppl as much as u say u do #then why r u attacking ppl period #ur really just hiding behind a righteous excuse to harm people. thats disgusting. i dont want u here

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koutawoo · 3 years

Note

Hi chan woo (😀). Baby 🧡 🥺 hope u enjoy having him :3

the thing is Hina learned she was gonna die but I think it was in the timeline that she ended up surviving. Chifuyu tho was told he was gonna die, and Takemichi tried to stop it and then he died again probably not expecting it. Must have been disappointing :(

Mikey is just pain made into a character lol

. YES GOODBYE TO KISAKI FINALLY. Wish he had a better reason for all of that lol. WELL LADY I HAVE DRY EYES IT AIN'T GOOD FOR MY EYES TO PUSH IT EVEN THIS MUCH.

I didn't really cry, maybe tears? Not sure lol. I think a happy ending is definite don't worry.

Also I read translations of the character book and Baji's dream was to have a pet shop and I'm... (sir maybe u could survive if u dIDN'T... ). Also this is really random but I miss hq (Kuroo hngh...canon kuroo content hits different. Sorry for the looong ask hngh.

"Hi chan woo" :doubt:

takemichi literally has to go back xxx amount of times bc of all these confounding factors. it's touching, rlly, bc initially he wanted to save only hina, his ex, but after finding family in touman, he's trying to save everyone T__T takemichi's immeasurable disappointment, i s2g, whenever he thinks he did everything right and he's all happy only to learn that smth went wrong UHHNGJHGHG

I WAS SO EXASPEARTED WHEN I LEARNED ABOUT KISAKI'S MOTIVE, LIKE, SIR?? take rejection like a man, omg. when the protagonist and antagonist are both (initially) motivated by... romance. i mean, for kisaki, it definitely turned into smth twisted, pride, obsession, control maybe

it's okay, baji T_T chifuyu's a pet shop owner, u and ur dreams live on

when do u think season 5 is gonna be released?? we're def gonna get tons of nekoma + kuroo content so the wait will be worth it :')

#tokrev spoilers #cognizant anon san #kouta babbles

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milkybunbuns · 3 years

Text

creative!reader with karasuno

w/ Suga, Daichi, Asahi, Noya, Tanaka - gn!reader - part 1

w/c: 979

warnings: none

RAINBOW masterlist!

I think Suga is a really creative person and would be rlly good at cooking cause he’s wife and husband material at the same time

He would definitely encourage you to join him in a cooking session, especially if it’s free, plus, it’s not his fault the advertisement said for couples!

You obviously agreed and the two of you went to the centre the following week

The two of you were beyond shocked when you saw who was leading the class

Miya Osamu

You were about to faint cause you really didn’t wanna see the rivals and how the hec did he get into Miyagi

Fortunately oh ever so reliable Suga caught you before you could fall

And thankfully a professional attitude was kept between you and Suga and Osamu

I mean, at least it wasn’t Atsumu...

The two of you made some onigiris

You failed to even cook the rice since basically everyone just microwaves their food when they’re feeling lazy which is 24/7

Luckily Suga fixed it up for you

You did terribly at making onigiris

You could hear Osamu audibly sigh and face palm, but luckily Suga was there to help you

Fortunately the onigiris didn’t turn out too bad

I mean at least you were good at one thing..

Eating the onigiris

Daichi was accompanying you to the art store cause you wanted some new stuff

It’s almost Christmas so unlimited shopping spree =D

Daichi be holding all your bags for you as you run from one store to another

You were currently running through all the aisles throwing more and more things in the cart

Daichi be sweat dropping as he pushes the trolley while balancing all your bags

This was definitely a much more vigorous exercise for him than volleyball, but honestly he was wondering how you were so full of energy when all he wanted to do was go home and away from the cold snow

As the two of you entered the last isle, daichi thought of a great idea to quickly end this trip

He ran to the end and grabbed a sketchbook, ditching the trolley, and running back to you

You quickly examined the paper and frowned

“Daichi, you seriously know nothing about art, this paper is so thin, how is it meant to hold anything? But don’t worry, I’ll teach you plenty about art when we get home~”

He just made it worse for himself

I guess it was worth a shot?

You were busy drawing all day and had basically been in your room all day, not even going out to have meals and just getting everything delivered to you by ur boyfie which u were rlly grateful for

Lunch was coming around and you were still sketching out designs or smthing

Poor bby was feeling vry lonley

Shyly enters ur room after knocking ofc

Comes up behind you and hugs you

You immediately melt into his hug

I mean, he literally is a soft giant <3

The two of you stay like that for a while before u begin prying him off so u can continue ur work

He wants to be respectful to u but he also just wants some of ur time since you’ve been cooped away all day

So he continues hugging you

And you eventually give in and cuddle for an hour and you shower him in attention :)

It was almost Noya’s bday and you wanted to surprise him w/ something home made since he’d probably like it more than store bought gifts

First u convinced him to take a photo w/ you which was easy cause he’s rlly eager to spend time with u

And then, over the month leading to his birthday, you painted the photo and it was kinda hard to keep away from him

He always came over to ur house after school and the artwork needs to dry but it would be spotted by him

You messed up a few times and there were a few minor smudge marks

Noya became very sus of you since you were rejecting more dates and stuff than usual

You felt rlly bad to see him upset, but u told urself it was for a good purpose

So finally on his b day, you hand him the painting which has sweet words written around the frame

He bursts into tears from joy and hugs you tightly, trying to spin u around like in the romance movies he’s being watching with Tanaka

That failed tho, so both of u fell to the ground

Honestly u weren’t expecting him to be so pouty

“Is that why you haven’t been letting me come to ur house as much?”

“Yeah, sorry bby, I just wanted to keep it a surprise.”

He grinned and held the painting close to him inn appreciation

Tanaka heard that you were going to have a merch store

He wanted to help with the design of the items to appear ‘cool’ as if he wasn’t already cool enough

So he came up with this design of a bald egg with lipstick and a cowboy hat

Honestly, if he wasn’t ur boyfriend, when he handed you his design, you would’ve immediately chucked it out

It was uhm pretty bad, sorry Tanaka

But none the less, you took it to appreciate his efforts and t would be just plain mean if u threw away his efforts like that

So the next week you sold T-shirts with that design

Surprisingly, that design was sold the most out of everything!

So in the future, you forced Tanaka to design more stuff for your merch store

At first he was so pleased

But after a week or so, he realised how hard this job was and how time consuming

So he quit, which you were a bit disappointed about but respected his decisions anyways :D

#suga #sugawara koshi #daichi #daichi sawamura #sugawara #asahi #asahi azumane #haikyuu nishinoya #nishinoya #noya #nishinoya yu #tanaka #tanaka ryuunosuke #karasuno #haikyuu!!#haikyu #haikyū!!#haikyuu

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etherealwaifgoddess · 4 years

Text

Maybe I Am? - Chpt.1

Characters: Steve Rogers x Bucky Barnes

Summary: After meeting in a chatroom Steve and Bucky finally meet up in real life, however Bucky isn’t anything Steve was expecting. Master list HERE.

Content Warning: a very confused Steve, an adorably disappointed Bucky.

Word Count: 3.1k

Author’s Note: Hello lovelies! One of my favorite versions of Steve is the sweet confused Steve, and so I decided to have a little fun with him in this fic. Also, Steve Rogers is a Slytherin and I will fight ya’ll to the death on that one. If you don’t believe me read #10 in THIS article. There will be six chapters total, one posted every evening until we’re done. Hope you enjoy! XOXO - Ash

Chapter One

Bucky stared at Alpine, desperate for more companionship than the fluffy white cat could provide. He’d been stuck inside for the past four days while he got over the damned late winter cold he’d caught. Bucky hadn’t been sick in almost two years so he couldn’t really complain, but he was social by nature and Alpine could only do so much for her end of the conversation. He finally drug himself out of bed, carrying his fluffy duvet to the sofa with him so he could throw on a rerun of The Good Place and fire up his laptop. Bucky logged into the chat site he used to frequent that hosted discussions on all different fandoms from movies to television shows to music. He used to love hanging out online in some of the Harry Potter chats, especially HuffleHaven which he was pleased to see was still active. Bored and not really feeling up to fangirling at a level appropriate for a proud Hufflepuff, he hopped into a punk rock appreciation chat to hopefully find a way out of his bored funk.

WinterBae: so ur a Greenday fan?

AmericanIdiot: What was your first clue?

WinterBae: well i heard the sounds of hysteria

AmericanIdiot: LOL nice. Is that your cat in the profile pic?

WinterBae: yuppp, that’s my girl Alpine

AmericanIdiot: She looks sweet. So, what fandom are you here for?

Bucky flicked over to view AmericanIdiot’s profile and was instantly smitten with the blonde who claimed punk rock was life and he could live on tacos alone if given the chance. He wondered briefly if the pic was real, it wasn’t unheard of for people to use model’s photos instead of their own, and the guy in AmericanIdiot’s picture was definitely model worthy. Tall, buff, and gorgeous; Bucky was definitely interested in more than conversation. Well, nothing to make himself feel better than a little harmless flirting.

xxXxx

Three months later.

AmericanIdiot: I can’t believe I let you talk me into this.

WinterBae: oh come on! it’s not that bad, just let the hat sort you and i’ll let you retreat to your boring punk rock group.

AmericanIdiot: You so owe me for this one.

WinterBae: puhleeeease please please please

AmericanIdiot: FINE. But you still owe me.

WinterBae: whatever you want. Promise :D

[Private Chat Initiated]

AmericanIdiot: Well shit.

WinterBae: was i right??

AmericanIdiot: I hate you.

WinterBae: nope, u luv me. and i told u so ;)

AmericanIdiot: How in the ever loving fuck am I a Slytherin?? I literally help my neighbor with her grocery bags every week! I feel like a puppy kicker now.

WinterBae: the hat sees inside ur soul puppy kicker mwahaha

AmericanIdiot: You totally owe me.

WinterBae: fine. coffee? sunday morning maybe? r u near red hook?

AmericanIdiot: I’m over in Park Slope. So not too far. Wait, are you serious? You really want to meet up?

WinterBae: let’s meet @ magnolia cafe 10am on sunday

AmericanIdiot: But how will I know it’s you?

WinterBae: i’ll wear a red rose tucked in my hair. cuz i’m classy like that lol

AmericanIdiot: Haha. Nice. I can’t wait.

WinterBae: me too :)

Steve closed the lid of his laptop, unable to believe his luck. He was finally going to meet WinterBae in real life after months of witty banter and playful flirting. He pulled on his sneakers, ready to go run out all the nervous energy thrumming inside him, and he hoped he wasn’t getting his hopes too high. Sam had already pointed out several times that he didn’t know a whole lot about WinterBae, not even what she really looked like. Steve maintained he wasn’t shallow and he knew enough about her to know that she was everything he’d hoped to find in a woman. She was bright and funny, kept him on his toes for sure, and had a biting wit that left him laughing harder than he had in years. Steve had been so lonely since Peggy up and left him, moving back to England after eight months of living together. He was finally ready to move on and he hoped WinterBae would be the one to do that with.

Across the bustling streets of Brooklyn, in his little apartment in Red Hook, Bucky was rapid fire texting Nat about his date. She cheered him on good naturedly, happy he was actually putting himself back out there after the disaster that was Brock Rumlow. Bucky was proud that he’d been so smooth in asking AmericanIdiot to meet up, or at least smooth by his own nerdy standards. He reminded himself several times that even if the profile pic wasn’t really AmericanIdiot, he would most likely still be interested. How could he not be after spending the past three months talking to the guy every day? They talked about everything together and Bucky felt like he knew AmericanIdiot better than some of his real life friends. Two more days and he would have a name and a face to put with the amazing, brilliant, artistic guy he was completely head over heels for. Now he just had to figure out where to buy a red rose.

xxXxx

Bucky sat at a small cafe table inside Magnolia Cafe, trying not to fidget with the rose tucked behind his ear. He felt a little silly for wearing it, but also kind of like he was in a romance novel waiting to meet his knight in shining armor. He had worn his very best skinny jeans and a black button up with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows, leaving his assortment of bracelets on display. He wasn’t getting his hopes up, but damned if he wasn’t going to look his best just in case. Nat had insisted on going along, wanting to make sure Bucky’s online friend wasn’t some kind of creeper. The fierce redhead sat a few tables away, poised and ready to strike should the guy make any untoward moves. Bucky loved how protective Nat was, though honestly she was a bit terrifying at times. So he waited, scrolling through Buzzfeed News, hoping that maybe this once luck would be on his side.

Steve was so nervous he was sweating a little by the time he got to the cafe. He wiped his palms on the side of his tee shirt, wondering belatedly if he should have put in a little more effort. All he had was work clothes anymore, even the navy tee he had on was emblazoned with their star logo and the name of their gym underneath. Paired with the only jeans he owned and a lightweight leather jacket, he hoped he would make a good first impression. WinterBae had mentioned being into fashion but Steve had never had an eye for that sort of thing. Nerves rising, Steve hoped he would be able to find WinterBae easily. He knew only that she would have a red rose tucked in her hair, and from a brief mention a few weeks ago about haircuts, he knew to expect shoulder length wavy brown hair. But that was it. Steve reminded himself that he needed to go into this with open eyes, if nothing else he would walk away with a new friend. Someone other than Sam to hang out with, somewhere other than the gym they co-owned. Deep down though, he still hoped for more.

The cafe was dimly lit inside and it took Steve a minute to let his eyes adjust. He scanned the room quickly, taking note of all the women sitting at various tables. Most were with other people, leaving only four on their own, but try as he might he couldn’t spot red roses on any of them. He felt a pang of disappointment but prayed he was just early and not being stood up. He was about to go order himself an Americano to sip while he waited when he heard a rough, masculine voice call out “AmericanIdiot?” in a tone tinged with awe.

Steve turned in the direction of the voice to see a man about his age with a red rose tucked into his shoulder length wavy brown hair. His mouth moved while his brain reeled, “WinterBae?”

“Yeah! Hey!” Bucky felt like he was vibrating out of his skin; he was so thrilled. The blonde god standing in front of him really was the man from the picture, and he looked even better in real life, if that was possible. Brilliant, sweet, and hot. Bucky had hit the jackpot.

Steve let himself be pulled into a warm hug, the man was a few inches shorter than his own 6’2” and fit nicely against his chest. The man. WinterBae was a man. Steve replayed all of their conversations in his head and kept coming up with the same assumption. Steve had never once in a million years thought he was a man. He supposed in retrospect that having a female best friend, a love of clothes, and a cat he called a “fur baby” was not necessarily concrete signs of being a woman, but damned if Steve had even thought twice about WinterBae’s gender. He forced himself to return the hug, happy to meet a new friend, even though his heart was crushed under the disappointment that nothing more would be coming of this meeting.

“I’m so glad you made it.” Bucky told him as they pulled apart.

“Of course. Gotta get my cup of coffee for being tortured by a magical hat.”

Bucky laughed, a rich rumbling sound, “Yeah, a Slytherin would never pass up the opportunity to benefit off the kindness of others.”

“Well at least your poor little Huffle-brain won’t realize what’s going on.”

“Ouch, punk. Those are some strong words from someone who watched Sorcerer's Stone for the first time less than a month ago.”

“It’s your fault I did too, jerk. Uh, you can call me Steve by the way.”

“Steve, nice. It suits you. I’m Bucky. Well, James, but everyone calls me Bucky.”

“Now that’s a story I have to hear.” Steve said with a laugh and let Bucky lead him over to the line for his drink.

They ended up spending two and a half hours talking at their little table at the cafe. Coffee turned into a muffin to split, which turned into a panini and iced teas for both of them. Steve couldn’t remember the last time conversation flowed so easily with someone. Talking to Bucky felt like they had been best friends for years opposed to only knowing each other a few months. They topic hopped relentlessly, never losing each other along the way. Steve found himself laughing so hard his ribs hurt when Bucky spoke about one of his teenage misadventures with his sister Becca.

Bucky was very clearly flirting by the time they finished their lunch; shooting Steve sweet little smiles every so often and pushing his hair back behind his ear coyly. Steve knew he should put the breaks on the flirting, he didn’t want to lead Bucky on, but it was so much easier to just smile along with him. In his thirty years of life, Steve had never once questioned his sexuality. Men had never held any attraction for him, but something about the way Bucky chewed on his bottom lip, the tiny tip of his pink tongue peeking out, had part of Steve wanting to taste that lip himself.

With a cough, Steve shook his head, trying to clear his unexpected wayward thoughts. “I’m sorry, I missed that.” he prompted.

Bucky titled his head slightly with a lopsided smile, “It’s okay. I was just saying that my sister was the one who gave me the courage to come out to my parents. She came out first and seeing how my parents reacted made it a lot easier for me to. She was only 15 at the time, but she always has been a hell of a lot braver than I am.”

“I doubt that. But that’s great you guys are so close.”

“Yeah, she’s been my best friend since the day she was born. Well, other than Nat, but don’t tell her that.” Bucky chuckled thinking back on the loving bickering Becca and Nat used to do when they were younger. “So how did you come out to your parents?”

Steve wanted to die on the spot. A bright blush tinged his cheeks, staining his pale skin all the way down his neck. “I, uh. Well. I’m not. Um. I didn’t, actually. Because I’m not, um, gay.” Please god, let the ground open up and swallow me whole, he prayed silently, unable to meet Bucky’s eyes.

The smile Bucky had worn, waiting for what he thought must have been one hell of a story based on Steve's blush, completely vanished. Along with all his foolish daydreams of dating someone as amazing as Steve. “Oh. I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have assumed.” he finally choked out semi-normal sounding.

“No, it’s my fault.” Steve hastily protested, “We talked so much online and I didn’t realize you were a man.” The wide eyed shock on Bucky’s face made Steve realize he hadn’t made things any better.

“Wait, what? You thought I was a woman?” Bucky asked incredulously.

“Well, yeah. Nothing about your profile or our conversations were very clear and I guess I just somehow jumped to the conclusion that you were. I’m sorry, Bucky.”

Disappointed but not wanting to miss out on a great friendship Bucky forced himself to smile reassuringly at Steve. “It’s okay. No harm done. So you're straight then?”

“I think so.”

That did not help things. “That’s kinda something you know.”

“Yeah, I thought so too. I like talking to you though. A lot.” Bucky was looking at him like he had three heads and Steve just wanted to crawl home and die of embarrassment.

“Okay. I like talking to you a lot too. We can just be friends though, Steve. I’m not going to get my feelings hurt just because you bat for the other team.”

“Thanks. I really am sorry. If I were to ever switch teams you’d be the first guy I call. You’re incredible.”

“Aww come on. You don’t gotta say that. It’s all good, really. Now tell me more about this gym you run.”

Steve sighed, thankful to change topics, “Well, my best friend Sam and I opened it when he retired from the Air Force six years ago.” Steve launched into the story of how he met Sam through the VA where they had both volunteered as teenagers and then years later, they teamed up to start Shield Gym which was now one of the most popular gyms in the city.

The conversation lulled a little after that and Bucky politely refrained from any more flirting. Steve found himself missing the cute little gestures. He couldn’t figure out what the hell was wrong with him but he knew he needed to figure it out sooner rather than later. They parted as friends, swapping cell phone numbers so they could text instead of the message boards and private chats online. Steve initiated the goodbye hug, wanting to test the feeling of the smaller man in his arms once more. It was just as nice as the first time and only added to Steve’s confusion.

Nat caught up with Bucky barely a block from the cafe, pulling him for a tight hug when she saw his morose expression. “Do I need to kill him?” she asked seriously.

“He's straight.” Bucky told her, “Well, he said he thinks he’s straight. Whatever the hell that means.”

Nat quirked a brow at that, not commenting though.

“Either way, back to spending all my nights with you and Alpine. And Becca, when the brat has time to fly out.”

“Maybe don’t write him off just yet.” Nat said carefully, “I saw you two together, it was sweet.”

Bucky sighed, “I can’t do it, Nat. Just let the poor straight boy be slightly confused on his own before he settles down with some perfect human barbie doll he meets at his gym.”

Nat pursed her lips in disapproval but remained silent. She wrapped an arm around Bucky’s waist and followed him home so they could share a pint of gelato and watch a trashy rom-com until Bukcy felt better.

“Shit, Sam.” Steve whined at his best friend back in their gym in Park Slope. He’d gone straight from the cafe to the gym, knowing Sam was working the midday shift. “How did this happen?”

“You made an honest mistake, it happens.” Sam tried to be kind with his words, “But, and I’m not saying I told you so, you didn’t really know as much about this guy as you thought you did.”

“That might have been the politest ‘I told you so’ ever.”

“I am sorry that it didn’t work out though. I know you thought you really falling for this WinterBae.”

“His name is Bucky. And, I don’t know Sam, he’s just as incredible in person. More so, even. I don’t know what to do. I’m not gay. But…. maybe I am?”

Sam set down the bottle of spray disinfectant and the rag he was wiping down the machines with. “Steve, I know you had your hopes up for this guy. But he’s a guy. And being straight, or not straight, is typically something you figure out before your thirties.”

“I know. I know.” Steve groaned, raking his hands through his hair.

“At least you made a new friend, right?” Sam tried hopefully.

Steve shook his head, “Yeah, but it doesn’t feel like enough. I don’t know what to do, Sam.”

“You gotta figure that one out on your own, man. But whatever you do, don’t drag that poor boy through whatever premature mid life crisis you got going on. It wouldn’t be fair to him to get his hopes up.”

“I know that.” Steve fought to keep the glare he wanted to give Sam off his face, “I would never hurt him. I just… I need to think about it, I guess.”

Sam clapped Steve on the shoulder supportively before resuming his cleaning, “You do that. And if you need someone to talk to, I’m here.”

Steve thanked him and then headed out. He had a lot of thinking to do.

#steve rogers #bucky barnes #stucky #steve rogers x bucky barnes #idiots in love #confused steve rogers #gay bucky barnes #meet ugly #stucky fanfic #stucky fanfiction

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dangerliesbeforeyou · 4 years

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my top 10 series of 2019~

aka i gush about shiz i watched this year for waaaaaay too long lol...

i watched a lot of stuff this yr (well... it felt like a lot? there’s a lot more i wanted to watch but i’m terrible at time management lol...) so let’ssss explore that in a ~numbered list~ lol

(spoilers - there’s a lot of gay shit here lol... what can i say, twentybiteen really pulled thru lol)

10 - Stranger Things (series 3)

i know some people didn’t like this series, but i legit thought it was really good lol... i felt it had gone back to the style of the 1st series a lil more? (whereas series 2 had felt a lil disappointing in a way??) & i loved all the new characters introduced (robin is a personal fav, obv), & the whole splitting off into the lil groups was really effective in not just feel like it’s always the same group together, and it also allowed for some interesting character moments!

visually, stranger things always looks amazing! but i thought the whole summer/july 4th vibes really made it especially stunning tbh... as most things on this list, i’ve only seen it once, so i would like to rewatch it at some point (actually wanna do a full stranger things marathon tbh i was trying to explain what had happened in the show to my friend who stopped watching it early in series 1 & it was so difficult to remember exactly what had happened in it lool... )

there were obv things about it that i wasn’t as big on, like the whole evil russian-invincible guy was v cliche and kinda silly, & some of the actions scenes were a bit awkward(?) feeling... but i’m a sucker for any 80′s style media so those things just reminded me of the goonies or some shit lol

9 - Ghosts

actually the funniest & cutest series ever tbh!!! as someone who grew up with horrible histories with the original cast, this just made me immensely happy to see the whole team together again! the humour style is v similar to horrible histories too btw, though i feel they let themselves have a lil more ‘dark humour’ than in that (since this is more a general audience, whereas hh was definitely more aimed at kids tbh... tho they still won a comedy award for it lol! actual legends lol anyway...)

only downside is that it’s only 1 series atm & it’s pretty short... but i know there’s gonna be a new series at some point so i’m v excited for that!! i feel there’s sooooo many places they can go with the concept (i.e. exploring how/when the other characters died (like kitty!!! i need to know her story lol i love her!), maybe introducing another character who can see ghosts?? like a medium/psychic or something/etc ...) but legit, please watch this if u haven’t!!!

8 - Good Omens

this pretty much took over the internet this year lbr lol & tbh i’d def say it was worthy of the praise!! ineffable husbands aside, the main story is super engaging and enjoyable, with some really awesome side characters (& some of my fav character designs in anything ever tbh!!) but definitely the biggest draw was the ‘6000 years mutual pining’ romance which they did so well lol & it was something that was genuinely so lovely to watch tbh!! i also really loved the ending message of the show! i really hope to rewatch this next year when i think it’s gonna be aired on british tv at last????

downsides would be that the plot can be a bit confusing at times? but maybe that’s just me being dumb lol... but i imagine it’s a lot easier to understand if u’ve read the book lol?? i don’t have a problem w/ aziraphale & crowley not being “explicitly” gay or whatnot (i know i’ve seen some people annoyed with this?), since the whole idea of their relationship is so much larger than just them bonking or whatevs lol? (in general i think more media should have less focus on kissing/intimacy as an indication of love/romance... which is something i’ve already talked about lol)

oh, and the title sequence is INCREDIBLE lol i seriously loved it so much!!

7 - Killing Eve (series 2)

finally finished this the other day & it was so good!!! i really love the dark comedic tone of the show tbh & i def feel there was more of it in the 2nd series then the first! i also liked the further development of villanelle & eve’s relationship, which is obv the highlight of the show tbh! there was also a nice lot of twists tbh, though i’d say it was a lil less intense than the 1st series? (overall i’d say i prefer the 1st series, but the 2nd was a fab continuation... btw i also watched the 1st series this yr lol)

negative points are that the plot wasn’t quite as interesting as the 1st series... i think cos the focus of the murders was taken off of villanelle that we lost some of that drama from the 1st? i thought the ghost was gonna be a more integral part but she was kinda weirdly pushed aside once we learnt her identity? & the creepy son dude just annoyed me lol (but i suppose that was the point lol...)... so like yh there were lil things that didn’t engage me as much as the first, but overall i still really enjoyed it lol

this is def fulfilling the hannibal-shaped hole in my heart tbh... (another series i finished this yr...)

6 - Dark Blue Kiss the series

look, it’s no surprise this is on my list lol... i was hella hyped for this series when it was announced last yr, even though my expectations were VERY LOW after kiss me again the series (which, lbr, is a massive mess lol... like it’s My Mess tho)... but for real, this series really exceeded all my expectations... & then some! like i’m legit shook at how good it was ngl! especially morksun’s storyline, which was by far my fav in the show (as much as i’m petekao trash lol...) also, i was surprised by how genuinely pretty this show is! esp in comparison to kma (like i know i keep going on about the goddamn bruise makeup but it is so ugly in kma, but they really did a great job in dbk tbh!)

ok so there’s a lot of flaws lol... like... a lot (i’m already complained a lot so i won’t bore u with that rn lol...) but for real, the thing that i love the most about this is the discussions of coming out/homophobia/general young people struggles/etc etc which is so refreshing to see in these series! like i love that despite the cheesy tropes, it still knows when to be serious & genuine...

5 - He Is Coming To Me

another thai series, i believe this has the same director as dbk? (don’t hold me to that tho...)... legit one of the best, if not the best, thai series i’ve ever seen tbh! so adorable, so well acted, so funny & heartwarming like... legit it’s so good!! i was already excited about it from the trailer, but the way it really delivered on the emotionality, whilst keeping it lighthearted, was truly wonderful tbh! the main actors did a brill job i gotta say, and all the side characters were amazing too (there really wasn’t a character i didn’t like i’d say tbh? i need to rewatch tbh... there’s a lot i’ve forgotten since this came out p early in the year lol)... also, visually it’s so pretty!! i swear the cinematography in these thai series just keeps getting better & better & it def improves the watching experience tbh!

a down point would be that the first ep is a bit slow/awkward to get in to... & i think it def could put someone off? but i’d say to stick w/ it since it just keeps getting better & better! i’d actually say there isn’t really anything else i didn’t like about it ngl? it’s just so good guys... u really need to watch it!

4 - Russian Doll

probs the only series on this list that i actually actively went to rewatch straight away lol (didn’t do a full rewatch btw)... it was SO good for real! i already loved the premise lol (it’s basically groundhog day, which is already such a great film, but they explored those ideas even more in this which i loveeeed) the leads are fantastic, and the story is generally so interesting! plus the editing & song choices are really brill tbh...

my one complaint would probs be that the series loses a lil momentum at certain points (esp later in the series), but it still keeps ur interest, and the ending is really well done too! i know there’s gonna be a 2nd series, so i’m really hoping it’ll be able to live up to this one, and also explore more of the characters/concepts/etc! i’m def hyped for it tbh!

i feel like this series is simultaneously underrated and also v well known lol?? like i know everyone sees that ‘thursday! what a concept’ meme but i feel like i didn’t see as many people talk about it as much as other series this yr???

(for my top 3, i’d say i love them all equally/for different reasons... so the order they’re in is changeable lol)

3 - Gentleman Jack

one of the greatest bbc series of the year, maybe even the decade lol! actually a masterpiece of cinematography, incredible acting, gorgeous costumes, beautiful depictions of love and intimacy, hilarious characterisation & just generally a wonderful series!! like i can’t praise it enough! it’s literally everything i could ever want from a series, and more!!!!!!! like everytime i think about it i just feel like ‘!!!!!’ constantly lol... like... what did we do to deserve such a series for real?? something that i esp loved was that i vividly remember not that long ago w/ people complaining about the bbc for having minor lgbtq characters in things, so to have a actual main lesbian couple series be on prime time bbc telly is kinda mind blowing lol... like.. i know we’ve got a long way to go, but it does make me immensely proud!!

i have no complaints lol... other than - needed to be longer (i think we’re getting a 2nd series right???? i hope so tbh!!)

2 - The Untamed

look, i don’t make 15 piece series’ for nothing lol... this show really got to me ngl... like i knew it was gonna be amazing from seeing tonnes of mutuals start watching it & praising it.. .but ohhhhhhhh boy i wasn’t reading for the angst and heartbreak and just generally how invested i’d be in all the characters lol... like genuinely there’s so much to praise about this show! it may not be as super ‘polished’ as some of the other shows on this list, but it really has so much heart and hard work and dedication put into it which really shows in the final product!

there’s obv issues with it, but i feel like it’s kinda unnecessary to go over them lol? there’s so much more of this series that has brought me genuine joy, the biggest being the fact they were still able to depict a really beautiful, loving and /romantic/ relationship despite the strict censor is truly incredible lol!! like w/ good omens, it just shows what you can do to depict love/romance without having to over-sexualise something...

i feel like i’m saying less for these top 3, but it’s just cos i’ve already gush to high heavens about how much i love them lol...

1 - HIStory 3 - Trapped

you - *pretends to be shocked that this is my number 1*

yeh... no surprises that this is in my top 3 lol... what can i say that i haven’t already screamed about for months??? this series truly surpassed any expectations i could have had for a HIStory series... the story line is complex & pretty well done (it’s not perfect... but nothing is so....), the characters are wonderful & also brilliantly acted! i think the thing that i love the most is that the director wanted to create a series that wasn’t just a cheesy gay series (don’t get me wrong, i loVE cheesy gay series’ lol... ) but also would have a more interesting, well developed & more ‘mature’ story line (i think esp in comparison to other HIStory series’ which are usually school/uni based)... it’s also one of the few lgbtq series i’ve seen that isn’t just about ‘first loves’, and doesn’t place a big emphasis on a sexuality/identity crisis... it’s just so unabashedly a mystery-romance drama, which is just so refreshing to see! & i genuinely hope we can see more series like this, where gay characters don’t need to ‘prove’ themselves in order to be in a series or to be in relationships (which it often feels like, where writers need to explain /why/ characters are gay...)...

phew... that’s a lot of text lol, just like w/ the untamed, i feel like i’ve already talked about the negative points of the series (plot holes, awkward moments, weird editing/sound choices, bad tropey plots), but the positives of this series seriously make it worthwhile, and i’m just so so SO happy this show exists lol...

all 3 of these series have a special place in my heart of inspiring lots of my own exploration of art, as well as writing, which has been really crucial in me understanding what i wanna do with my life (i know that sounds kinda weird, but at the start of the year i really didn’t know what i wanted... and i wasn’t even sure what i was good at lol... so thru these shows i was able to discover a lot more about my own style of working & thru all of them i was able to meet some wonderful new people on here which has made 2019 actually one of my most enjoyable years on tumblr!

this has been an...... interesting year lol... but definitely these shows made it just a lil bit better!!!

Happy new year to anyone who actually read thru this & let’s hope 2020 brings us even more brill shows ~~~

#personal #favourite tv shows #2019 tv shows #long ass post lol... with pics (oooooh... fancy)#i rambled a lot here lol...#if u read thru (or just skim - or even if u just look at the pics lol) let me know which series u agree with?#or what ur fav series r?#there were other things i watched & didnt finish this yr which i enjoyed but decided to just stick to the series i finished lol...#not gonna tag any of the series cos i want y'all to click 'read more' to find out lol...#tho... if ur following my blog i feel it's p obvious what i've chosen lol....#also that ~numbered list~ thing is in ref to jenny nicholson... cos i love her lol #i think this might b the first time i've done this/?? maybe??#idk...#time is an illusion am i right ladies?

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bloodfcst-a · 4 years

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* romance headcanons.

name: kisaragi yufi.

nickname: i’d imagine some would call her kisa-chan or yufi-chan at some point, but i’m pretty sure most just say yufi. give her cute names, y’all !

gender: nonbinary. he/she/they. don’t use ‘ it ’.

romantic orientation: panromantic. she’s of little preference who or what she might fall for. that being said, she’s not a hopeless romantic, and she doesn’t go looking for love. however, she does seek attention, and providing her with it might be one way to get in with her.

preferred pet names: no preference towards pet names. some of her partners are more endearing, and might lean towards sweeter terms. some of her dynamics are more sass or snark ( looking at you, ren ! ), so she wouldn’t be surprised by teasing insults from time to time. the only hard pass yufi has is against ‘ baby girl. ’ even if she has some daddy issues, she’s not actively interested in being reminded of it with names like that.

relationship status: defaulted at single, but there’s a few flirtationships going around.

favorite canon/fandom ship: y’all we hopped from canon a while ago. but.... if i had to pick? leon & yuffie in kingdom hearts. not officially a ship, but their partnership gives me life, moreso than any of the alternatives ( looking at you, yuffentine ). if i had to pair her with anyone from compilation of vii, though ? i’d pick between tseng & rufus.

favorite crossover ship: i love all of my crossover ships on this blog. majima is such uwu energy, he’s so soft with her and would literally murder for her.... not unlike dean ! nishiki’s gone through a lot, he deserves some soft touches...some redemption... ryoji is very sweet, he’s cutesies even if he’s hiding a lot behind his smiles. kaito is very tough big softie man. ren is.... spicy boi & i’m so into him, he’s so dramatic. he’s the closest yufi has to an equal, in terms of dramatic flair & personality & responsibility for a community he cares for. and her friendships are? so solid. so good. so enriching and life-giving. 100/10. i’d like to thank god but also danny & alex. if u have not seen kiryu & tida... ur missing out.

opinion on true love: it’s not something she expects or looks for, but believes in it for other people. yufi’s not above the concept of soulmates; in fact, because she believes in reincarnation, the concept of two souls finding their ways back to each other is entirely possible, and she thinks that’s romantic. but for such a thing to happen to her? she doesn’t spend too much time thinking about it, doesn’t want to be disappointed if nothing works out for her. she has slight attachment issues anyway, finding it acceptable to be vulnerable around someone, so... maybe if someone’s really willing to put in the work, she’d go ahead & commit....... at some point, in her own time. her committing is as close to the concept of ‘ love ’, true or otherwise, that she’s willing to admit to... for her, personally.

opinion on love at first sight: yufi’s skeptical of the concept. figures it would be more temporary infatuation than anything else. but again, she does believe in soulmates, and so the concept of recognizing them would be... the closest she’s willing to admit such an idea might be real.

how ‘romantic’ are they?: she wants to be wined, dined, romanced. take her on exciting trips. she’ll do the cliche, she’ll do the extraordinary, she’ll do the unusual. they can go sparring, go fishing, go gambling. as long as she’s with her loved one, spending time, feeling appreciated, everything goes. yufi’s fiercely loyal to anyone who would show her the respect, attention, and appreciation she deserves.

ideal physical traits: fit, well-kempt, taller than her. no preferences towards slender vs bulky, hair length, body hair, etc. though on the topic of body hair-- it has to be maintained. whoever she’s with must keep attention to their appearance, and recognize that the impression they make also reflects on her. don’t disrespect yufi by looking like trash, essentially.

ideal personality traits: strong-willed. confident-- if not themselves, then in something. to have a strong belief, and to be willing to fight for it. powerful-- could be mentally, physically, either, both. a person with conviction, with fortitude. independent.

unattractive physical traits: someone who shows a lack of interest in personal care. someone out of shape. if the bulk is of muscle ( like kaito & kiryu ), then she’s not opposed. if it’s mainly fat, if the person doesn’t care for health & vitality, then she’s not impressed. unattended dress. for example, if the person is wearing a suit, but their shoes are covered in mud & the pants aren’t pressed & the shirt is wrinkled to shit, then it’s really half-assed and she’s not impressed by their slight attempt to dress well-- goes back to being un-kempt, which to her goes beyond just hairstyles & facial hair.

unattractive personality traits: those without sincerity, compassion, empathy. those who show no ability or interest in perseverance. those who have nothing to be passionate about, no drive, nothing that excites them. people with outlandish personalities that dwarf hers in compasion. those who only live in a facade-- who aren’t willing to showcase who they really are, especially when no one’s looking. people who are irresponsible, unethical, don’t have any concept of a moral code. those who would abuse others and use them as tokens: manipulative, conniving, deceiving, abusive.

ideal date: anything goes, as long as she receives their undivided attention, quite frankly.

do they have a type?: humanoid? that’s about it, really. she’s not terribly picky.

average relationship length: depends on the type of the relationship, the premise of it, the timing as well. yufi’s most acquainted with no-strings-attached and one-night-stands, as commitment’s usually rather difficult with her. she’s not too willing to form connections-- the concept has to grow on her, and she can be a slow burn. if it’s something like... while she’s taking classes abroad, don’t expect it to last outside of school. however, if the person is really interested in staying with her... for a more permanent amount of time ( i.e., has expressed interest in forever and has said or implied as much ), then she’d only stop being opposed to the idea as long as they recognize the potential complications and difficulties and complexities of the situation. she expects most things to be short-term.... she’d be really surprised with long term.

preferred non-sexual intimacy: sitting on someone’s lap, curling up close to them.

commitment level: once she’s involved with someone seriously, then she’s definitely committed to just them. but if they’re not specifically attached to one another, if there’s no mention of exclusivity or things lean more casual, then she’s more open. that being said though, if she’s fond of someone, she’s willing to keep them in her circle for a while as long as the interest is mutual.

opinion of public affection: yufi doesn’t care about being affectionate in public, but she does care about drawing attention to herself. so as long as no one is commenting and if they’re subtle in their gawking, she doesn’t care about who is watching what she’s doing. to that regard, she can be rather bold with touches, caresses, kisses and et cetera.

past relationships?: none to particularly note.

tagged by: @breselin ( i’m sorry this took forever ! ) tagging: y’all. this is a lot to ask of y’all so i’ll just say... whatever u want to share.

#♘ kisaragi .#♝ meta.#long post /

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sturlsons · 7 years

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jaywalkers FAQ + extras

(( spoilers! please don’t open this unless you’ve finished reading pt24 ))

HELLO. first of all, if you’ve made it this far, i want to say thank you for sticking with the kids right until the very end! thank you, thank you, thank you.

as always, my FANTASTIC team: teddy ( @soodyo ) and ksenya ( @fyolette ) without whom this would not have been a thing.

i’m going to ramble a bit about the series here, with some extras and questions like the packaging says! without further ado:

general

≫ jaywalkers tag // jaywalkers fanart tag (excluding teddy’s fantastic work which is in the main tag)

≫ my askbox if you have any more questions // my twitter // my instagram (locked but i’ll accept all requests!)

≫ previous FAQ post

playlists

≫ jaywalkers titles // all the songs i borrowed fic titles from, in order

≫ le petit ____ // a café playlist

≫ god of disc jockeying // a vertigo playlist

≫ raspberry muffins and existentialism // kuroo and tsukki

≫ one thousand three hundred and seventeen // akaashi and bokuto

≫ boxes // bokuto and kuroo

≫ jaywalking

questions

≫ will you be writing more haikyuu!! fic? nope! jaywalkers was my present/contribution to the fandom, and while it’s been a fantastic ride, i won’t be writing anymore! you can now find me in my BTS sandbox.

≫ le petit ____? le petit writer-is-still-an-asshole.

≫ WHO IS Iwaizumi the Angry Review Guy’s EDITOR, DAMN IT. iwa-chan’s editor is The Dog Park. as in, Do Not Approach The Dog Park.

≫ Hinata the Hug Guy? happy as ever! the world always needs hugs; his career is flourishing. his scooter, not so much, but it was totally not kageyama and bobby pin’s fault, okay.

≫ OIKAWA? IWAIZUMI? they couldn’t do it. the condoms were rilakkuma. it set them back by five years in terms of getting their shit together, but they do eventually get their shit together. ushijima has to intervene; i’ll leave you to imagine how that happened.

≫ USHIJIMA? TENDOU? ushijima is very happily uninterested in romance and relationships. tendou clocks this after a few misguided attempts at wooing him. neither disheartened nor disappointed, he instead takes up an elective in literature and vows to become ushijima’s BFFL. it works.

≫ Gecko Tooru? Count Dracula? they continue to be worshipped; they are immortal.

≫ what is kuroo’s reaction to seeing bokuto’s project? they aren’t sure which one of them cried harder, but kuroo likes to think it’s bokuto and bokuto likes to humour kuroo.

≫ what are their careers? tsukki actually ends up landing that actuarial management job, but he also has a double master’s in economics because he’s greedy about education, which eventually leads to him being a visiting lecturer at universities. kuroo works his way up the ranks of a conglomerate to make a place in the executive suite. bokuto is an obnoxiously whimsical fashion photographer whom the industry hates and loves in equal amounts. akaashi is a simply terrifying and efficient engineer with a company the country probably can’t do without.

suga teaches dance, and daichi works at kuroo’s rival company, something he never shuts up about. yamaguchi stays in education the longest, ten years from the day he first started university. he opens up a small clinic of his own eventually, and yachi and gou do the interiors. kageyama and hinata go pro, because what else were they supposed to do, study?

oikawa earns the most out of all of them, which would be just fine if someone knew what the fuck he does for a living.

≫ does tsukki get his headphones back? nope! tsukki progresses to earphones, and kuroo keeps the headphones safe. in a velvet lined box in the bottom drawer of his study desk, first in his campus abode and then in every progressively larger apartment he and tsukki move into.

≫ brah they what OF COURSE THEY MOVE IN TOGETHER. in tsukki’s second year and kuroo’s final year of their bachelor’s degrees. it’s a splendid disaster at first, which is amazing because you’d think they’ve gotten used to each other’s habits by now, but no. kuroo uses approximately thirty hair products and tsukki’s tiny basic colour-protect shampoo bottle is lost among them, much to his chagrin. tsukki has the terrible habit of midnight snacking that personally offends kuroo, who follows a military regimen during the week so that he can drink his bodyweight in screwdrivers during the weekend. they both initially hate someone being in the same bed as them. but they work it out, they work it all out, because they’re kind of embarrassingly in love and refuse to do without each other.

≫ k,, ur o tsu kk ki ,, same. what do u wanna know? ask me anything, i know everything about their lives.

they move in during their bachelor’s degree. kuroo graduates with a master’s in management and companies looking to recruit him before he even sends in his application. tsukki gets a chance to do a one-year master’s program abroad and hesitates to take it because he’s too attached to everyone and everything and he doesn’t want to take off just when he’s gotten everything together. it leads to the longest and worst fight he’s ever had with kuroo (sneering, screaming, sarcasm; everything that they’re so horribly ashamed of later), one that kuroo wins. when tsukki comes back, he thanks kuroo for forcing him to grow, and he gathers kuroo up in his arms, and he promises himself that he’ll never forget this lesson that he’s learned.

when tsukki moves out of his childhood home for good, there’s one final night when he and akiteru are sitting on opposite ends of the couch, watching a movie they both used to love as kids. halfway through, akiteru hunches over with his hands to his face, and tsukki sits quietly, still watching the screen. they’ve never had a single fight for all the wrong reasons, and they’ll never have a single one for all the right ones.

kuroo proposes when he’s twenty-seven and tsukki’s twenty-five. says “i love you so much that it changed my life. will you let me use the rest of it to tell you that every day?” and tsukki’s so busy hyperventilating that he doesn’t even say yes, something kuroo points out when tsukki indignantly sobs “why are you still on the floor? get up!” pay attention, tsukki, you’ll never get your doctorate this way.

(before that, kuroo stumbles through asking akiteru for tsukki’s hand, talking about how he’s been expecting this promotion and when he gets it— akiteru cuts in with a gentle “kuroo, as far as i am concerned, you had my approval six years ago.” so when kuroo gets that promotion, he calls akaashi up because they’re on the same sartorial wavelength, and bokuto is very offended at not being invited to ring-shopping.)

the wedding is fantastic. bokuto brings up the bubble butt video in his best man’s toast, kuroo cries his eyes out, tsukki laughs, there’s a raspberry muffin on a plate in front of the god-knows-how-many-tiered cake. even akaashi cries.

man, they love each other. kuroo the hotshot young managing director bakes tsukki dinosaur cookies in their high-end kitchen and brags about him at fancy business parties. tsukki calls him tetsu and carries him to the car when he falls asleep on the couch during poker night with the boys. no one lives as happily as they do, because no one’s happiness is as hard-earned.

≫ bo .. o k ku a ka ? ? bokuto’s one of those genius photographers who makes it big all of a sudden because his talent is spotted. the problem is, he’s kind of too fucking dense to register his success (ever). one evening he brings home two mcdonald’s happy meals like “keiji, keiji, i scored a shoot with this one magazine”, and akaashi indulges him, smiles, takes a sip of his fanta, says “that’s nice. what magazine would that be?”

“l’officiel!”

akaashi chokes on his fanta.

it’s not all rainbows and butterflies, though; bokuto earns a reputation for being a temperamental photographer, which, well, is entirely accurate. they recruit a personal assistant for him, this girl with a death glare and a high ponytail who takes exactly none of bokuto’s shit. (he never thought he’d meet someone even half as terrifying as akaashi, but life is always throwing new things his way.) he also has to deal with a shitton of temperamental models, whom he complains about when he puts on his reading glasses and balances his laptop on his knees in bed, waiting for akaashi to get in and listen.

bokuto still wears his polos but he also wears glasses now. adult, put-together, just as obnoxious as ever. akaashi’s definitely the more frightening one of the two with his blueprints and ironed shirts, but no one bokuto works with is ever willing to believe that his muse is an industrial engineer. (they are, however, very welling to believe that bokuto met said muse because he took over a thousand pictures of him. one thousand three hundred and seventeen, to be precise. that they are very willing to believe.)

no photographs bokuto takes of akaashi are ever released, despite everyone wanting to see. bokuto pronounces akaashi as the love of his life very publicly, and then spends the rest of his time making sure no one takes pictures of akaashi. vicious, protective, expensive clubs with VIP entries, glitter and glamour yet bokuto still stutters if akaashi says something cutting enough, and akaashi smiles to himself like yep, still got it.

going to the country house with kuroo and tsukki once a month is a ground rule. meeting up with the rest of the gang once a month is a ground rule. being efficient but ridiculous, silly but ambitious is a ground rule. living life to the fullest is a ground rule.

≫ ARE THEY ALL HAPPY? THEY’RE ALL HAPPY. daichi and suga get married first, followed by kuroo and tsukki. bokuto and akaashi don’t even consider it for the longest time; do it almost as an afterthought because the idea of rings is nice. kenma goes into research, iwaizumi goes into journalism, yachi goes into design.

shimizu is as beautiful as ever, michimiya is as whipped as ever. asahi and nishinoya never have more than that one dance at suga’s new year’s eve party, but nishinoya promises to always be ready to fight if someone ever upsets asahi. (himuro and izuki, on the other hand, have several existential crises when granrodeo breaks up and they go into different lines of music production, before they realise that not making music together doesn’t mean they can’t make music together.) gou and tanaka are constantly voted cutest couple wherever they go, and end up getting matching tattoos because no one informed them that’s too corny to be legal. saeko shows up at one point with a hot russian girlfriend, and bokuto gets another pitcher turned over his head for the trouble of asking if said russian girlfriend would like to come to one of his photoshoots. (it’s iced tea, which bokuto considers progress.)

they’re all happy. friends are forever if you reach out, the world is beautiful if you reach out. these kid always reach out. kuroo and tsukki always reach out.

≫ I’M ALL UP IN MY FEELINGS NOW. I’M ALL UP IN MY FEELINGS NOW.

THAT’S A WRAP, FOLKS. i will always be answering questions about jaywalkers, whether it’s headcanons or other extras or behind-the-scenes re: the writing process. like i said, just because this is where i stop telling the tale, it doesn’t mean that this world no longer exists! it always will, and you can revisit it whenever you want.

thank you for sticking with the kids, and with me as i improved! 2016 taught me a thing or two about writing, and i want to show what those things were in 2017, so i hope to see you around for my writing endeavours for the year.

thank you once again! see you.

#jaywalkers #kurotsuki #kurotsukki #bokuaka #haikyuu #eh #fic

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