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inevitably-johnlocked · 3 days

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Hello Steph!!! I was wondering if you or your wonderful followers have recs for me. I'm looking for fanfics with a deep study of Sherlock character. His past, his behaviour etc. Maybe without ships? But I'm ok with johnlock tho. Thanks ❤️

Hey Nonny!! *HUGS*

OOOF Most of my fic recs are Johnlock stories, so I do apologize for that... I DO have a list I put together for "Introspection" type fics, which are essentially character studies or either character so I can use your ask for that list, but I think you'll also find some stuff you'll like on these lists:

POV Sherlock 1st & 2nd Person

POV Sherlock 3rd Person Pt. 1: Fluff

POV Sherlock 3rd Person Pt 2: Hurt/Comfort & Whump

POV Sherlock 3rd Person Pt 3: Angst/Angsty Fluff or BAMF Fics

Fics in “Sherlock’s Voice”

If anyone has something more catering to Nonny's request, please do, but for now, let's see these Introspection fics!

INTROSPECTION / CHARACTER STUDIES

The Moment When by drekadair (K, 509 w., 1 Ch. || TGG Fic, Friendship, First Person POV Sherlock, Introspection, Worried Sherlock) – Sherlock sees John in the pool, and doubts. Set during the end of "The Great Game." (FFNet)

The Hollow Man by HHarris (G, 639 w., 1 Ch. || John’s Chair, Introspection, Sherlock’s Big Feelings™, Post TRF, Angst, Emotional Turmoil, POV Sherlock, Pining / Sad Sherlock) – Still reeling from the apparent loss of his one and only friend, Sherlock returns to 221B for the first time after the events of The Reichenbach Fall.

Five Seconds by xXLadyLovelaceXx (K+, 658 w., 1 Ch. || TGG Pool Scene, Friendship, Introspection) – In the half-second before Sherlock shoots the jacket, John notices something. (FFNet)

Back in the Saddle by grannysknitting (M, 1,577 w., 1 Ch. || Post TGG AU, Donovan POV, Observation / Introspection, Protective Sherlock, Injured John, Case-ish Fic) – Their first return to solving crime after the pool and the explosion. (FFNet)

Upon This Throne by ifonlynotnever (T, 1,773 w., 1 Ch. || Pre-TRF, Angst, Romance, Sherlock’s Mind Palace, Introspection, Imagery, Pining Sherlock, Drug Use, Passage of Time) – Inside Sherlock's mind is a Palace. Inside the Palace are many rooms. Within the largest room is the Throne. Upon the Throne sits the King. (FFNet)

Love and Bombs by Spark Writer (T, 1,780 w., 1 Ch. || Post S3, Romance, Angst, Pining Sherlock, 1st Person POV Sherlock, Introspection, Ambiguous Ending) – Love and bombs aren't all that different, John. In the end, they're almost indistinguishable. (FFNet)

You Can Imagine The Christmas Dinners by johnsarmylady (T, 1,780 w., 1 Ch. || Friendship, Family, Introspection, Fluff, Post-ASIP) – Set the morning after a Study in Pink, John sits and contemplates Mycroft's words. (FFNet)

Hear No Evil, Speak No Evil by PipMer (T, 1,895 w., 1 Ch. || Alternate Universe || Deaf John, Mute Sherlock, Friends to Lovers, Romance, Fluff and Angst, Character Study, Morse Code, Love Confessions) – John is deaf. Sherlock is mute. There are no two people more suited for each other.

Spectrum of Mourning at the Funeral of a Solitary Man by TheBookshelfDweller (T, 1,956 w., 1 Ch. || Angst, Grief, Friendship, Sherlock First Person POV, Introspection) – Because each kind of love produces its own kind of grief, a long-ignored voice tells the story of five mourners of Sherlock Holmes, a man who in the end, was all but solitary. (FFNet)

The Lie-In by KendylGirl (M, 2,000 w., 1 Ch. || POV Sherlock 1st Person, Bed Sharing, Fluff, True Love, Introspection) – Five months after his return, John and Sherlock spend a day in bed. Part 2 of When to Let Go

Study in John by chappysmom (K+, 2,158 w., 1 Ch. || Post-ASiP, POV John, Introspection, Friendship, Nightmares, Caring Sherlock, John’s Limp) – After the events of "A Study in Pink," John lies on the couch in Baker Street and thinks about the whirlwind events of the day. What is he getting himself into? (FFNet)

Coming Full Circle by KCS (K+, 2,358 w., 1 Ch. || Alternate TGG, Friendship, Drama, Violence/Death References, Drugging/Poisoning, Kidnapping, BAMF John, Moriarty POV, Introspection) – Moriarty had John for almost six hours between his abduction and the showdown at the pool - more than enough time to implement a Plan B for his escape should Sherlock call his bluff with the fake bomb vest. (FFNet)

It's All Fine by AkoyaMizuno (T, 2,459 w., 3 Ch. || Post-TGG, Introspection, Mild Angst, Friendship) – Sherlock never asked what happened in the hours between John being kidnapped and the events at the pool. It occurs to him, days after the fact, that he probably should have. (FFNet)

Overture by Kate_Lear (M, 4,435 w., 1 Ch. || First Kiss / Time, Friends to Lovers, Angry John, Introspection, Developing Relationship, Embarrassed / Insecure Sherlock, Morning After, Bed Sharing, Cuddles / Limpet Sherlock) – A short snippet on how John and Sherlock might have got together.

Days Go By by Hummingbird1759(T, 4,454 w., 6 Ch. || Angst, Friendship, Post-TRF, Introspection) – The characters' lives go on after the Fall... sort of. (FFNet)

When Your Belly's in the Trench by Morgan_Stuart (T, 4,743 w., 1 Ch. || PTSD, Character Study, Rescue, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Implied Torture, Trauma, Danger, Drama, Kidnapping/Captivity) – The next time that door opens, John Watson will kill the person on the other side.

Applied Linguistics by what_alchemy (M, 4,837 w., 1 Ch. || Possessive / Anxious Sherlock, Introspection, Bed Sharing, Past John Whump, Est. Rel., Marriage Proposal, Sherlock Loves John So Much, Word Play) – “He wants to shake John by the shoulders, wants to open his mouth and swallow John whole. Wants to marry him.” Sherlock searches for the right words.

Bound Into the Fire by Tara Laurel (T, 6,672 w., 5 Ch. || TEH, Suspense, Hurt/Comfort, Introspection, Bonfire Scene, John Whump, Mary is Nice) – "John sometimes compared Sherlock Holmes to the flaming beast in his mind...Not such a bad way to go, John mused. Being consumed by Sherlock. Dying in his fire. No. This was different. He was burning alive. Not figuratively. Not some flowery metaphor. Burning." There was no two minute stay of execution. "Amazing how fire exposes our priorities." (FFNet)

Victim, Bait, Hero, Friend by KimberlyTheOwl (T, 7,887 w., 1 Ch. || Post-TGG Epilogue, Angst, Friendship, Hurt/Comfort, Introspection, Past Kidnapping / Torture / Implied Rape, Panic Attacks, Worried / Possessive Sherlock, Lestrade is a Good Friend) – Some insights into why John was perfectly willing to throw everything away for a chance to kill Moriarty at the pool. Trauma, ugliness, and finally healing. Some nice supporting work by Lestrade as well. (FFNet)

A Friend Indeed by Sanru (K+, 8,190 w., 1 Ch. || Missing John, Friendship, Drama, Introspection, Possessive Sherlock, Worried Sherlock) – Something has gone terribly wrong with a supposedly simple case. John Watson is missing. While the search for him is proving to be fruitless, it has made Sherlock realize that having an emotional attachment to someone may have its disadvantages but he liked being able to call John his friend. Now if only he could find out what happened to him... (FFNet)

The Skin Over My Heart by standbygo (E, 8,849 w., 1 Ch. || Post-Hiatus, Fake Relationship, Case Fic, Dog Tags, Military, Homophobia, Gay Bashing, POV First Person Sherlock, Friends to Lovers, First Kiss / Time, Declarations of Love, Undercover, Haircuts, Flashbacks, Touching, Pining Sherlock, Hospitalization, Metaphors, Introspection, Hand Jobs, On the Couch, John’s Past, Angst with Happy Ending) – Sherlock and John are still trying to adjust to Sherlock's return from his hiatus when John's friend Bill Murray brings them a case. Someone is targeting the LGBTQA+ members of Bill's unit. John and Sherlock go undercover at the unit, but when they end up having to flirt to flush out the suspect, Sherlock realizes he's in over his head.

Illogical, even. by magikspell (E, 9,119 w., 1 Ch. || Grey-Ace Sherlock, Character Study, Growing Up, Victor Trevor, Romance, First Time/Kiss, Sherlock-centric) – Five reasons Sherlock never believed in love and one reason he does now.

A Is For Aftermath by ElvendorkInfinity (T, 10,567 w., 1 Ch. || Injury / Whump, Hurt/Comfort, Friendship/Pre-Slash/Bromance/Platonics, Hallucinations, Introspection, Insecure / Worried John, Big Brother Mycroft, Alternating POV, Anxious Sherlock, Self-Deprecating, Mildly Possessive Sherlock, 3G Moment) – John is still hallucinating, Sherlock cannot sleep, and Lestrade has a new case for them. But will life at 221B ever be able to return to normal? Epilogue to M is for Moriarty. (FFNet)

Always the sun by Rose de Sharon (K+, 12,377 w., 3 Ch. || Song Fic, Alternate Post-TGG, Friendship/Bromance, Hurt/Comfort, Introspection / Reflection, Injury Recovery, Obsessive / Protective Sherlock, Nightmares, John’s Past, Bed Sharing / Cuddles) – Sherlock ponders about how much his life has changed since John has become his flatmate. (FFNet)

To be loved by Strange_johnlock (E, 12,436 w., 8 Ch. || Post S3, Established Relationship, First Person POV Sherlock, Pet Names, Soft Sherlock, Mild ADHD, Protective John, Captain Watson, Body Appreciation, Bottomlock, Rough Sex, Travelling for Holidays, Introspection, Sherlock Loves John So Much It Hurts) – John is so deeply integrated into the work, both as my conductor of light, and as a great shot with a vicious right hook who tackles men -and women- no matter their size all in my defense. He protects me with all he can without question, and this loyalty is surely more than I deserve. Or: Sherlock is counting his blessings.

holding steady by darcylindbergh (E, 12,724 w., 4 Ch. || Post S4, Love Confessions, First Kiss, Growing Old, Gone Fishing, Mood without Plot, Soft Sherlock, Caring Sherlock, POV John Third Person, Anxious Sherlock, First Kiss / Time, Touching, Feeling Old, Sherlock Worship, Crying Sherlock, Cuddles, Comforting, Introspection, Retirement, Hand Holding, Forehead Kisses, Caring John, Bed Sharing, Emotional Love Making) – Sitting on a thick wool blanket at the end of a rickety dock side-by-side, legs dangling over the edge, a styrofoam container of wet, dark dirt between them, they’re fishing. John knows what this is about. This is about finally figuring it out.

The Velveteen Doctor by Lantean_Drift (M, 12,815 w., 1 Ch. || Angst, Dev. Rel., Introspection, Mild Whump, Taking Care of Each Other) – A series of events that show John just how real he has become to Sherlock – like a bright, brilliant flash of colour in an otherwise greyscale world.

Pattern Behaviour by SilentAuror (E, 14,835 w., 1 Ch. || POV First Person Sherlock, Jealous Sherlock, Pining Sherlock, Introspection, Stroppy Sherlock, Light Humour, Friendship, John Takes Care of Sherlock, First Kiss/Time, Wall Kisses, Fluffy Angst, Happy Ending) – Sherlock doesn't even know why he resents John's dates so much. Until the day he does know. Slight angst, unrequited feelings (but don't let that scare you off!)

Hope for Heroes by Richefic (K+, 16,887 w., 5 Ch. || Post-TGG Fic, Introspection / Flashbacks, Friendship/Epic Bromance, Hurt/Comfort, Worried/Anxious Sherlock, Sherlock Admires John, BAMF John, John Deduces, Fancy Party, John’s Self Esteem, Domestics) – In the final moments of "The Great Game" Holmes hopes he will have the chance to tell his flatmate that he was wrong. Heroes do exist after all and the one in front of him is called Dr John Watson. (FFNet)

And A Doctor by stillwaters01(T, 24,962 w., 6 Ch. || Five and One, BAMF John, Hurt/Comfort, Doctor John, Friendship, Character Study) – It was only when people actually saw John working as a physician that they began to understand: that it wasn’t just about bullets and IEDs and trauma care under fire. That “doctor” actually covered a pretty wide field. And that John was bloody good at covering ground. 5 times Dr. Watson treated others and 1 time he treated himself.

A Quiet Life by DiscordantWords (M, 25,176 w., 6 Ch. || Post S4, Retirement, POV Sherlock, Awkwardness, Established Relationship, Family Dynamics, Minor Character Death, Questionable Parenting Choices, Non-Linear Narrative, 20 Year Old Rosie, Meddling Mycroft, Pining Sherlock, First Kiss, Love Confessions, Angst, Sherlock Whump) – There had been three days of silence and a funeral. Sherlock had the terrible feeling that whatever happened next would depend, entirely, on him.

How To Unfold a Heart by elwinglyre (E, 25,477 w., 7 Ch. || Post S4 Fix It, BAMF John, Mentioned Eurus, POV First Person Sherlock, Case Fic, Fluff, Slow Burn, Topping from the Bottom, 3 Yr Old Rosie, Introspection, Sexual Fantasies, John Worship, Ogling, Hand Holding, Kidnapping, Domesticity, Sherlock Whump, First Kiss/Time, Doctor John, Caring John, Soft Sherlock, Sensuality, Touching, Crying, Love Confessions, Anxious Sherlock, Rimming, Toplock, Fingering, Bossy Bottom John) – To Sherlock’s dismay, John’s return to Baker Street with Rosie is only temporary. Sherlock’s daily visits to Regent Park with John and Rosie illuminate his lost childhood memories and missed opportunities. But with each trip to the park, Sherlock also feels a growing sense of hope. That is until the past horrors return unexpectedly in a cryptic note folded in the shape of a heart. To decipher the message, Sherlock must uncover the nature of the hearts around him, including his own.

To Mend Icarus by AlessNox (T, 28,347 w., 14 Ch. || Post-TRF / Pre-S3 Divergence, BAMF John, Anger, Fighting, Sex, Bed Sharing, Stalking, Case Fic, John’s Past, Introspection, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Crime, Mythology, Darkness) – After a case lands John Watson in court, he tells Sherlock that he is leaving. Not understanding why, Sherlock decides that the only way to learn the truth is to investigate his flatmate, Dr. John Watson. Sherlock finds that coming back is not enough to fix all of the damage that he caused by leaving. A post Reichenbach, post reunion re-discovery fic.

Another Auld Lang Syne by DiscordantWords (M, 30,234 w., 31 Ch. || Post S4, Mutual Pining, Alternating POV, Introspection, Parentlock, Christmas, New Year’s, First Kiss, Past Drug Use, Angst with Happy Ending, Drinking, Sherlock Whump) – There had been years of missed chances.

Lucifer's Gardens by ampersand_ch (E, 32,679 w., 12 Ch. || GERMAN VERSION|| Romance, Friendship, Friends to Lovers, Murder, Poison / Drugging, Mystery, John Undercover, Academic Club, Therapy, Rituals, Jungian Archetypes, Doctors & Physicians, Grief/Mourning, Esotericism, Hospitals, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Love Confessions, John Falls In Love With Another Man, Jealous Sherlock, Crying, Doctor John, Hand Holding, First Kiss/Time, Mysticism, Hugging, Touching) – John goes undercover for an investigation as a favour to Lestrade in a village in Suffolk. The events surrounding the case awaken deep-seated fears in Sherlock. While John begins to come to a realisation of what he needs in Lucifer's Gardens, Sherlock tries to find a way to reach John – in more ways than one.

There's Someone On Your Shoulder by halloa_what_is_this (NR, 41,215 w., 6 Ch. || Pining Sherlock, Introspection, Daydreams, Sherlock Loves John So Much it Hurts) – Sherlock trips and falls head over heels in love, makes a lot of lists and stares, stares, stares.

Triage by scullyseviltwin (E, 51,612 w., 14 Ch. || Character Injury, Introspection, Pining Sherlock, Falling in Love, Slow Burn, Sherlock POV, Toplock) – Sherlock’s mind goes exceedingly, devastatingly quiet and gray-blank. When he speaks it’s through a thick haze, it’s through molasses, he’s so disconnected from the words that it may as well be the unconscious shooter speaking.

Spare Parts by Raina_at (E, 63,497 w., 10 Ch. || 24th Century / Futurism AU || Post TRF, Pre-TRF Relationship, Case Fic, Mutual Pining, Estrangement, Reconciliation, Science Fiction, Reunion, Nightmares, Angry John, Cybernetic John, Emotional Discussions / Heart to Heart, POV John, Scars, Past Drug Use, Forehead Touching, Emotional Lovemaking, Kissing, Apologies, Kidnapping, Rescue Mission, BAMF John, Bed Sharing, Top Sherlock) – Two years ago, Sherlock Holmes jumped off the roof of New London Hospital. Two months ago, he walked into John's clinic as if no time had passed at all. John hasn't seen him since. But then Sherlock knocks on John's door with a case he can't say no to, and while figuring out why the biggest manufacturer or synthetic limbs in the System is going after veterans, they also need to find out whether there's a way to fix what's broken between them. Part 1 of Realigning Gravity

Drawn to Stars by Silvergirl (E, 109,272 w., 60 Ch. || S4 Compliant to TLD / TFP Doesn’t Exist, Sherlock’s Italian Adventure, Sherlock/OC and Johnlock, Jealous John, Mutual Pining, Misunderstandings, First Kiss/Time, Idiots in Love, 3 Part Story, Slow Burn, Inexperienced Sherlock, Bottom Sherlock, Introspection, Multiple Alternating First and Third Person POV, Separation and Reconciliation, Emotional Love Making, Love Confessions via Letters, Angst with Happy Ending) – After the Culverton Smith case Sherlock is clean, working, and looking for a romantic partner—since John has told him that’s what he needs. Shame John didn’t mention he was interested in that role himself, before Sherlock went off to Rome with a gorgeous Italian copper to try to fall in love and become a complete human being. Part 1 of the Drawn to Stars series

Against the Rest of the World by SilentAuror (E, 151,714 w., 20 Ch. || PODFIC AVAILABLE || Post-TRF, Hiatus Fic, POV First Person Sherlock, Present Tense, First Kiss/Time, Big Brother Mycroft, Escaping from Capture, Soft Sherlock, Toplock, Insecurity, Infidelity, Travelling, Introspection, Pining Sherlock, Depression, Fantasies, Yearning for the Past, PTSD Sherlock, Suicidal Ideation) – Sherlock has been away from London for nine hundred and twelve days and counting, and has no idea what sort of reception to expect when he finally returns.

#steph replies #johnlock fic recs #introspection fics #character study fics #my fic recs #long post

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immediatebreakfast · 9 months

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I cannot begin to think about the... Everything that happened in this entry. It's either the death of the sparrows, Seward's unethical ramblings about how the future of science is maybe in his hands, or what could possibly come next.

Or the extreme disregard for Renfield's well being, and health after he completed his experiment. An experiment that shouldn't have happened because this old man's caretaker is far too interested in how he conducts a façade of madness that ends up worsening the mental problems that he already had.

Even if Renfield ate all of the sparrows, and even if I'm sad for the little creatures, what he goes through after he eats them is bad enough.

"The attendant has just been to me to say that Renfield has been very sick and has disgorged a whole lot of feathers." - Jack Seward, july 20.

"Oh yeah doctor that old patient that you have obssesing about for the last few weeks? Yeah he puked a bunch of dead birds, and is now sick." Is Seward going to do something about that, or is he just going to send a cleaning worker to clean up the mess? I don't know, and neither the text answers that. However, I really don't like the possible subtextual comment of Seward not helping Renfield with his physical illness.

And then this:

"I gave Renfield a strong opiate to-night, enough to make even him sleep, and took away his pocket-book to look at it." - Jack Seward, july 20.

The disregard, and violation of Renfield's privacy for "science" was sick. This old man has been coughing up feathers, and dead bird remains for almost an entire day, and the only thing that apparently matters is what is written in a diary. To the point of druggging Renfield without even checking if he was at least less sick than before.

Is Renfield now a patient in only name Seward? Is his well being an after thought to your ramblings about science? How the cage holds the man, and even if he tries to get free from the walls with his mind, at the end of the day there is no escape.

#This entry is too much #How did I not notice how bad it was last year?????#dracula daily #dracula #renfield #r.m. renfield #jack seward #cw: medical abuse

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traumatizeddfox · 22 days

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tw for SA….. i have DID and an alter went back to the abusive environment and j didnt know i was dormant for 2 years and i feel like this broke me. im having flashbacks and nightmares and im terrified by what ive done. i let myself be SA’ed and they druggged me and brought more men in and i have no idea how many hurt me but i was never on contraceptives. im so scared im getting testedt but abortion is illegal where i am i dont know what to do

I’m not entirely sure what the most you can do but are you able to get plan b? I would suggest that, and if you feel safe enough i would do a report or take a rape kit (if it has happened within the last 72 hours) as well. as for the abortion, im not too sure on that since where im from abortions are legal, i would assume that maybe if youre from the usa you can travel to a state that allows them?

I’m so sorry that this happened to you :(

#anon

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circusmania · 2 months

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SIN Chapter 5

▀▄▀▄▀▄▀▄▀▄▀▄▀▄▀▄▀▄▀▄▀▄▀▄▀▄▀▄▀▄▀▄▀▄▀▄▀ Notes: Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 6 Chapter 7 Chapter 8 Chapter 9 Chapter 10

♡ ▀▄▀▄▀▄▀▄▀▄▀▄▀▄▀▄▀▄▀▄▀▄▀▄▀▄▀▄▀▄▀▄▀▄▀▄▀

A heavy blanket draped over my shoulder. I couldn't hear the police sirens anymore.

The police ruled it as a suicide after checking the camera feed and seeing her… yeah…

I don't believe it was a suicide.

Vanessa and Omar were being questioned by the police like I was.

All their questions flew into one ear and out the other. I couldn't think about anything.

I couldn't register her death.

Suddenly, Marcus sat next to me.

Why can't he just let me be?

I didn't have the energy to chase him away.

“How did you know?” I asked, still staring at the ground.

“How did I know what?”

I gritted my teeth before snatching the collar of his shirt.

“Don't play dumb with me! How did you know it was too late!?”

He reached for my hands and slowly brought them down. And then…

He gave me a sympathetic look.

I could feel tears starting to form. Marcus let go of my hands and faced the ground. I did too.

Marcus's hand came to my shoulder, but I moved away.

God, I wish I could reverse time.

All of a sudden, Judy's body was carried out of the school on a stretcher and into an ambulance.

Time slowed as I saw the outline of her body underneath the heavy blanket.

A feeling of déjà vu consumed me.

My eye couldn't produce any more tears, I felt so hopeless.

Marcus hugged me tightly, and I didn't protest anymore.

“Who could've done this? Who… who could've drugged her?”

Marcus stayed silent.

My eyes blurred and went blank a few times. Who could've had this much hatred for her?

Vanessa and Omar came back. They both looked dazed and tired.

“I still can't believe Judy's gone.” Vanessa's voice broke. Omar patted her on the back and looked at me.

“Can I talk to you,” He looked at Marcus, “privately?”

I nodded and jump down from the bench, we were sitting on.

We walked away from Marcus and Vanessa and behind a tree.

“What is it?” I looked at him, “Do you know who drugged her?” My eyes widened with hope.

“No. But, I have a small hunch on who might have done it.” He leaned against the tree trunk and gave a long sigh.

“Marcus…?”

He nodded.

I sighed, “How are we going to prove that he did it? The police already said it was a suicide, and they can't charge him without any proof.”

“Find a way to get inside his house, find anything that the police would take seriously, and report back to me tomorrow.”

“And… what if it isn't him?”

Omar looked at me blankly.

“I doubt it.”

I nodded and he turned around. “Let's go back.”

Before he could walk away from behind the tree, I grabbed his shoulder.

“Wait,” He stopped and looked behind him. “About Judy, did you know she had been drugged already?”

Omar looked at me weirdly, “She hadn't been drugged 'already'. Only… yesterday.”

“Then… what did she mean that this had happened over and over again??”

Omar looked back and didn't say anything for a while.

“Judy… she…it was the only way to break out. And frankly, I applaud her for her bravery. She was a strong woman.” And with that, he left me.

I joined them a few minutes later.

Marcus and Vanessa seemed to be having some sort of argument because she was actively screaming and shouting. Omar didn't say anything.

“Vanessa? What's going on?”

“What's going on is that my best friend is dead, and it's all this fucker's fault!!” She pointed towards Marcus.

Marcus didn't say anything and only faced me.

“Uhm…-”

“Why don't I and you take a break elsewhere?” Omar interrupted me and took Vanessa's arm. “I'm sure your throat is dry from all that crying and yelling.”

Vanessa didn't protest and moved away with him. Omar looked back at me and gave me a quick nod.

Marcus and I were left alone, in silence.

I had to try and find a way to get into his house without breaking in.

I sighed, today has been an awful day.

But, I'm not about to give up on her. I'm going to find out who took that video and drugged her.

I looked back at Marcus, he was looking into the distance.

“Marcus,” He turned towards me, “I… I don't think I'll be able to sleep tonight alone. I would ask Omar, but he's going to be with Vanessa. Could I… possibly… stay with you?”

He tilted his head. “Do you seriously want to? I thought you doubted me?”

“I might doubt you, but I don't have any proof that you did it…”

“Mmm, okay then. Sure. You can stay with me, I'll drive us right now.”

“Now!? But I don't have my nightwear with me or anything!”

“You seem my size, and I have plenty of clothes back at mine.”

Before I could say anything else, two police officers walked up to us.

“You two can go home, expect the school to be off for a day or two, and also be expecting a phone call from us.” We both nodded and watched them walk away.

Abruptly, Marcus grabbed my hand and pulled me off the bench.

“Can't I say goodbye to Omar and Veronica first? It's also only noon, can't I come by your house later tonight?” I gave him a forced reassuring smile.

“Omar and Veronica have already left the school premises, and I don't trust you being alone.”

“Excuse me?? What is that supposed to mean??” I took my hand away, but he only took it back and held it firmer.

“I'd rather we go to my place now, it's good to have a shoulder to cry on and someone to vent to.”

His voice sounded more genuine and gentle, and I was way too tired to refuse. Plus, this might be my only chance to search around his house.

I nodded and he took me to his car.

It was a black 2019 Buick Lacrosse. (I'm a car enthusiast). It looked nice too.

“Woah, you have a nice car. I ride the bus to school, heh.” He opened the passenger seat for me.

“Parent's money.” He got into the driver's seat and started up the car.

We both put on our seat belts and Marcus started to drive.

We both stood in silence for a while as Marcus concentrated on the road. I wondered how he could even see with the hair covering his eyes.

He pulled up to a gas station, mere minutes later.

“I'm just going to pick up some snacks for tonight, want anything?”

I shook my head and watched him get out and enter the gas station.

I took my chance and started to search his car.

I unfortunately only found wrappers and some crumbled scribbled notes.

I unfolded some and realized they were poems.

One said, “I wish that, Across your back, Was a zipper, And that I, Could just crawl in, Forever a part of you.”

Another said, “You can't. I don't want you to forget me. I need you to smile when I haven't talked to you. And I finally can. I just want to be good for you.”

And the most recent one…

Let me in

It's a sin, you say,

Don't listen to them,

I want to breathe you in

Hold you in my arms

I can't stop thinking about you

Why do you have to be so far?

My eyes are blinded by your beauty

My mind clouded with thoughts of you

I can't get you out of my mind

Why can't you just be mine?

Don't make it any harder

Come to me sweetly

Just let me into your world

I will love you sincerely.

It's not that they weren't good, it's just that they were a little...creepy.

I continued to rummage, but didn't find any drugs or evidence that he did it.

Not that I expected it to be that easy.

I waited for Marcus to come back, which thankfully didn't take long.

“Hope I didn't keep you waiting for too long.” He set down a plastic bag at my feet and put on his seatbelt.

I know he noticed the scattered papers that I stupidly forgot to put away.

He smiled and faced the road. He started up the car and continued to drive to his house.

⋇⋆✦⋆⋇ 🏘️🏡🏠⋇⋆✦⋆⋇

He unlocked his front door and welcomed me in.

Something about his house seemed extremely familiar. I didn't like the feeling.

“My parents won't be home for a few weeks, so we have the place to ourselves.”

“You're acting as if we came to hang out…”

He didn't say anything back.

Marcus guided me upstairs to his room and settled the bag next to me.

“I'll go change, help yourself.” He smiled gently and left.

I quickly got up and started to search around. I was looking for anything, anything that could be used as evidence.

But I found nothing.

I gave out an exasperated sigh and fell back onto the floor.

The doorknob jiggled open and out came Marcus.

“Here you go, fresh nightwear for you.”

“Nightwear? It's not even the afternoon - what??”

I looked out the window to see the sun setting.

I swear, it was only just noon.

I took the clothes, hesitantly, and let Marcus lead me to the bathroom.

When I heard his footsteps grow distant, I continued my search in his bathroom.

AND I STILL FOUND NOTHING!!

Where can a man hide drugs besides his room or bathroom???

I groaned and got dressed.

I was about to leave when I noticed something peculiar.

The bathroom had a small window at the end. It falls onto the outside garden that leads to the forest next to his house.

The window was wide and big enough for me to squeeze through too.

“Hey, you okay in there?” I hear Marcus ask from outside the door.

I acknowledge him but don't say anything back, instead, I walk closer to the window.

Hypothetically, if I were to jump out the window, I would most likely break only an arm or a leg-

BANG

Marcus suddenly punched the door.

It shocked me so much that I almost stumbled backwards.

I hurriedly opened the door, “Marcus!? What the hell is wrong with you??”

He quickly hugged me tightly.

“I thought you-” He looked towards the window and dragged me out of the bathroom.

“Never mind that, it's been a long day for both of us.”

We walked back to his room, and we sat on his bed.

He put his hand on my shoulder, and I was immediately overcome with a wave of emotions.

All the recent events flashed before my eyes.

I started to cry again.

Marcus brought my head onto his shoulder.

And that night, I cried onto Marcus di Angelo's shoulder,

Judy's possible murderer.

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Want to read ahead? Click here!

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gardenofshadcws · 4 months

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Whale Weekly Day 58

Chapter 87 The Grand Armada

This is starting off like the geography lessons from Voyage of the Nautilus

I’ve got to hand to to Ahab, this quest may be nuts but his logic is sound.

“NANTUCKET WATER IS BETTER THAN FOREIGN WATER.”

Many whales!

Once again I feel like we haven’t seen the actual characters in this book in eons so seeing Ahab again with his pivothole and his stereotypical sailor speak is really refreshing

PIRATES

ACTION

Icky descriptions of “Asiatics” (Melville’s words not mine) and atheists as bloodthirsty, wld, and inhuman are icky

Oh, the Pequod just escapes. That was anticlimactic.

Back to the whales

You scared them :(

“Queequeg steered us manfully” there he goes agin

The drugg is brutal, poor whales

The mama and baby whales sniffing the boat is actually adorable and I’m crying knowing they’re about to have their heads bashed in

QUEEQUEG PETS THEM AWW

FRISKY BABY WHALE

CRUMPLY FLUKES

AWW

Oh right we’re supposed to be killing them

“unlike most other fish” Ishmael honey

Huh. So that’s how Nemo harvested milk from the sperm whale

Oh god that hamstrung whale, poor thing :(

After all that they only got one smh

#whale weekly #moby dick #moby dick liveblog #books

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ireadwithmyears · 1 year

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Making a Don’t Blame Me edit for the Armorer X Bo-Katan because!!! Leader of an extremely religious cult falls for the girl who has rebelled against following the way ??? this song is so them coated it’s insane. Like literally LORD SAVE ME MY DRUGG IS MY BABY I’LL BE USEING FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE

Also literally why am I like this? Why can’t I just listen to music like a normal person instead of immediately start associating the song with fictional characters

#Bo-Katan Kryze #the armorer #bo katan x the armorer #armorkatan #song association #it’s so them I swear #taylor swift #swifty #don’t blame me #reputation #why am i like this

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suicidesiren · 11 months

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so i got a ?

do u wanna have a slumber party in my basement

do i make your heart beat like an 808 drummm

is my luv ur drug

ur drugg

#kesha #coquette aesthetic #coquette #Spotify

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decaffeinatedcloudkryptonite · 11 months

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7 more minites until the next part pf @kazukazuhas smau drops and I feel like a drugg addoct in withdrawal BC of the later time

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inkdemon-whore · 1 year

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*Smacks down adoption papers* I will be taking Audrey. Hand over the serotonin.

kcjqqjc take da child like drugg

#al #talk #shitpost #i need sleep #but i was workin on a page for the ad #au #eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeah #o

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wheelerssecret · 2 years

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*violence and drugs alert*

Last night I had the most bizarre dream ever

Hopper was totally drugg*d and he took his car and put the city mayor inside of it

He started driving very fast and he was threatening the mayor like "where tf are my drugs???"

And then he took him out of the car and punched him, but he hit him so hard that the mayor was thrown to the sky

And then a helicopter appeared and cut the mayor like in parts, it was brutal, like parts of his body flying in the sky

That was really weird but I just had to tell someone because I really don't know wtf is going on with my mind

And sorry for my bad English btw

#stranger things #jim hopper #hopper stranger things

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biggestofmans · 2 years

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Opinion on mint chocolate ice cream because people keep saying it tastes like toothpaste

???? Tastes like MINT and chocolate CHIP the fuck are people ON? DRUGGS? Shits good! Not toothpaste

#tw drug mention #dream smp roleplay #dsmp rp blog #c!tommy roleplay blog #ask blog #ask

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milkie-yoongi · 2 years

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Yo shoudl I sell yooongi pacifier pictures I can deal them to you sneakily in a private place like we are exchanging fake druggs but the drug is the picture and you can snort it and it will go up your nose and you will make the sound Mordecai made me when it went up his nose like RlrraaaLLATRAAAAAAKAKALLALAAAAAAAARRAAAAARRARAAA

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sinceileftyoublog · 2 months

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Willi Carlisle & Golden Shoals Live Show Review: 2/9, Schubas, Chicago

From left to right: Grady Drugg, Willi Carlisle, Sophie Mae Wellington

BY JORDAN MAINZER

For Willie Carlisle and Golden Shoals, playing live is both an opportunity to share the stories behind the songs and the stories behind the band itself. Both the Fayetville, Arkansas singer-songwriter and Nashville-based folk duo work outside the machinations of the mainstream country scene but are intimately aware of it. Their songs, though, have the perfectly classic country mix of truth and legend, tales of living outdoors and the ills of late capitalism seamlessly weaving the rawness of reality with the showmanship of exaggeration. Their show at Schubas on Friday exemplified what they do best.

Carlisle delivered a triumphant set balancing his new album Critterland (Signature Sounds) with back catalog favorites. Accompanied by guitarist Grady Drugg and fiddler Sophie Mae Wellington (who also showed off her flatfoot dancing skills), Carlisle contextualized his songs with his personal history and ethos. When he started playing music, Carlisle traveled the country with his banjo, sleeping in his van or outside, including in Millennium Park and under the Clark Street Bridge. He busked in Mariano Park; like a tried and true flaneur with a flair for the colloquial, on Friday, he referred to Mariano Park what we Chicagoans call it: the Viagra Triangle. To Carlisle, though, these days, a song like "The Van Life" from 2022's Peculiar, Missouri is less biography and more a recognition of, as Carlisle put it, "the failure of the American left," the crisis of the unhoused, and immoral eviction laws.

Carlisle & Wellington

With so much weight behind his songs, it would be easy for Carlisle to fall victim to overexplaining. However, I found his banter essential, just as much a part of the show as the songs themselves. Take a song like "The Great Depression". Carlisle knows that giving a song that title while adopting even a bit of an old-timey aesthetic conjures thoughts of stock market crashes, John Steinbeck, and Woody Guthrie. To hear that it's really about epigenetics, and the passing down of not just generational trauma but the love of song, was revelatory, and made me appreciate it even more as a folk tune. When Carlisle played "The Arrangements" for his father, his father apparently replied, "I didn't know you knew your grandfather that well." Carlisle clarified that both his grandfather and father were good dads, adding a layer of complexity to it all; as a result of our actions, what we pass down, up, or to the side is not always so clear-cut.

During his set, Carlisle mentioned the paradox of "authentic" country music in 2024: After all, those who claim to be authentic are, as he noted, rehashing the very concept of authenticity. What was more important on Friday was a sense of audience or listener inclusion, true to the spirit of the punk music he grew up on or the folk music he's adopted. Hoedown "Boy Howdy, Hot Dog!" and Gospel-style main set closer "Your Heart's a Big Tent" inspired not just singalongs but stomp-alongs. And a show-stopping a capella performance of Critterland closer "The Money Grows on Trees" quieted the crowd to a state of rapture, save for what will be Carlisle's eternal outlaw chorus. ("Oh, hippies, hillbillies, won't you gather 'round? / A good man murdered, a bad man drowned / The cops are all moonshiners now / But the money grows on trees / Yeah, the money grows on trees.") The stories from an area of Northern Arkansas where, according to Carlisle, rumors fly and can rival network TV, may not be, for lack of a better word, authentic. But Carlisle knows, even on mostly true story "Higher Lonesome", that relying on our memory is not always the best way to be an effective troubadour, or even to get at the core veracity of life.

Golden Shoals' Amy Alvey & Mark Kilianski

Golden Shoals' two members came from contrasting backgrounds, and like Carlisle, they apply a punk spirit to folk music. Fiddle player Amy Alvey, from California, met guitarist and banjoist Mark Kilianski, from New Jersey, at Berklee College of Music in 2008. (Kilianski first picked up a guitar so he could learn Limp Bizkit's everlasting dumbass anthem "Break Stuff".) They started playing together in 2013 and touring full-time in 2016. Each member brings their distinct experiences into the Golden Shoals songs they write and sing. Many of the tunes could be country-folk standards, like Kilianski's rollicking "(Who'da Thought) Thinkin' About The Good Times (Could Ever Make You Feel So Bad)" and weary tale of hitchhiker's luck "Coffee in the Morning". Alvey is a rapt observer of place. On the as-yet-unreleased "Everybody's a Somebody", she sang about the "kind of famous" people in Nashville, squinting hard enough to see whether that truly is Orville Peck and Sierra Ferrell sitting at the bar at the American Legion. Another new song detailed the changes permeating Fredericksburg, VA, a city she's never called home but visited many times. The chosen details ranged from evidence of gentrification to "the Bachmans buried their favorite dog," which, yes, is a reference to the family of Daniel Bachman.

Kilianski

Alvey's "Bitter", co-written with Rachel Baiman, came to light after Spotify ghoul/CEO Daniel Ek basically insinuated that working musicians need to release new music every week in order to compete in the market. Though the irony was not lost on Alvey that the song is available to stream on Spotify, the band found a way to pivot: they've now been selling homemade bitters as part of their merch. It seemed like a metaphor for the night's bill. The music that artists like Carlisle and Golden Shoals make may never again be "popular," and it's not more--gulp--authentic because it's not popular. But it adapts within the hell-world, and finds strength in its own spirit and the reception of those who may find some validity in the stories for themselves.

Alvey

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