Tumgik
#like I’m sorry that you literally have paid no attention for the past year but this isn’t a shock
ashdreams2023 · 11 months
Text
In the shadows
Summary: you’ve always stayed in the back, letting others in the spotlight till he came along and you felt suffocated
Harry James potter x reader
Tumblr media
You got fifth place on the class in potions, it was an achievement but not one to brag about, hermione granger was the top of your year as always, there was no surprise there but the third place person made you swallow a bitter taste.
Pansy had asked for your help this past week and going on with that you thought you could help both yourself and her but no, it ended up with you correcting her homework and explaining basic concepts you’ve literally taken in first year.
By doing so you had little time for your own self and ended up staying up late to catch on then came to class sleep deprived, snape was not pleased with you looking half asleep in his class.
You weren’t terrible of course and it wasn’t like anyone would notice if you failed, except for professor snape.
As you gathered your things from the table to exit the door you felt a tab on your shoulder, you mentally prepared yourself to deal with another case of pansy.
To your surprise it wasn’t her but none other than the boy who lived himself, Harry Potter gave you an awkward smile before he spoke "hey, sorry to bother you but I know you’re smart and I could use the help before I get another troll" you blinked at the boy.
"Why didn’t you ask granger isn’t she one of your best mates?" You said closing your bag and swinging it over your shoulder "she’s the smartest girl in our year I think her help will be more valid than mine"
Harry shook his head blushing "she’s smart yes but…"he looked back at his friends then back at you "since they started dating study sessions just became awkward you know what I mean?"
You paused then felt your cheeks burning "I don’t know if I’m who you should ask though"
Harry sighed "please, I promise I’m a quick learner I just need extra help on our new assignment" you thought about it for a minute, one assignment wouldn’t hurt and Harry didn’t always fail potions, he used to score Acceptable and sometimes an E.
"Fine, meet me before supper in the library"
"Thanks you’re the best!" You inhaled sharply at his words and went to your next glass.
That’s how it began, the most ordinary person in the school started tutoring the great Harry Potter, everyone thought he was just using you but in all honestly, Harry wasn’t that bad of a company.
He paid attention to what you said and participated in research instead of depending completely on you alone to do all the work.
He teases you about being into tarot readings and helps you with DADA "you need to point your wand this way and focus on your target, your smart you can do this" those simple words also did things to you, the way he praised your intelligence and didn’t make fun of you for messing up.
"You did it! You’re brilliant just a perfect piece of work you are" he immediately blushed after saying that, realizing he might have went too far but by the way you smiled shyly at the ground it appeared to have the opposite affect.
"Thank you, you’re a good teacher…" Goodness you were awkward.
By the end of the year you could only hear your heart bounding whenever he’s too close, your face burned and all you could think about is your next study session.
Then Ginny kissed him.
After winning the quidditch cup for Gryffindor she kissed him in front of the whole school and your stupid crush made you want to shout and protest about it but you didn’t, you just couldn’t.
And what made it worse is he skipping your study session together, to celebrate the win…he’s probably making out with his new girlfriend now, why would he care about a nobody like you?
You skipped dinner and on your way to your house’s dormitory you got stopped by him in the middle of the hall.
Your wrist felt so fragile in his rough hand, even with gloves on, his hands stayed quite rough from holding onto the broom for a long time.
"Why didn’t you come to supper or the after party?"
You wanted to cry "….I wasn’t invited." What a lame excuse, he probably thought you’re pathetic.
Harry frowned "you don’t need an invite, anyone can come and celebrate you know we share the password after a win for anyone to celebrate with us before it changes next week" you in fact knew that and you hated how dumb you looked right now.
"What’s really the matter?" God why does he have to ask so many questions like he actually cares? You didn’t want to talk or look at him, it just made you more upset. He refused to let you go when you tried to pull away, your eyes were soon no longer able to hold back the tears. They ran down your cheeks like rivers "please let me go, I don’t want to talk to you right now" Harry’s green eyes softened but he didn’t let you go and instead pulled you closer towards him, leaving inches between your faces.
"Am I the reason your crying right now? Did I say or do something before now that upset you?" You shook your head, this was dumb you should’ve stayed in the library until everyone was done eating then went with your house.
"Liar, I hate liars you know that! Tell me what I did wrong?! I’m confused god damn it!" The infamous potter temper was kicking in and you knew how bad those were.
"It’s stupid…I’m…it’s just that…Ginny" you choked on your words, placing your hand over your eyes in a desperate attempt at hiding your face.
Harry didn’t say anything for a long while which made you believe he was so annoyed with your whining that he’s lost for words, but then he warps his arms around your body and holds you in a tight embrace.
You froze then hesitatingly looked at him, he’s looked down at you with those brilliant green eyes that held so much kindness "I’m sorry…I should have done this from the start" he leaned down and kissed your temple.
You stared at him both confused and embarrassed.
He chuckled " I’m sorry you saw that, I didn’t except Ginny to do that but if you hadn’t noticed I didn’t kiss her back…I don’t like Ginny like that"
Your heart bounded hard in your rib cage "why are you telling me this?"
He licked his bottom nervously "because I like you, like a lot and not just as a friend but like you in the way that I want to do this every time I see you" he learned down and pressed his lip’s against yours and you melted against them.
"Harry I-"
"No, please I’m sorry…I didn’t mean to, can we start over?"
You’ve lived in the shadows of people’s lives for so long that it seemed impossible for you to be a person worth mentioning but Harry, Harry made you feel like somebody, you were standing next him and not in his shadow, for once you were worth more than what you thought you were.
"Yes, please."
866 notes · View notes
neytirisheaven · 4 months
Text
how could i ever compete with that?
warnings: no use of y/n, angst, hurt/no comfort, mentions of child abuse, strong language
regulus black x fem!slughorn!reader word count: 2k part two of “she’s all i wanna be so bad” (part one)
summary: as you wanted, regulus finally confronts you, but it doesn’t go the way either of you planned
notes: YES I’M ALIVE!!! this is literally so late AND I KNOW YOU’VE ALL BEEN WAITING and it didn’t go the way i originally planned for it to go but i think i like it a bit better than part one.. reader may be a bit dramatic but i really enjoyed writing this near the end so i hope you all enjoy!! (ps i’m so sorry in advance (and this is slightly proofread so if there are any mistakes i apologize!)) and for me, at least, this will be posted on thanskgiving day, so for all the people who celebrate thanksgiving, think of it as a thanksgiving gift :)
FOR THE PAST few weeks after the incident with Regulus and his new girlfriend, you haven’t spoken to him once. You tried, but he paid you no mind as he was too focused on his brand new girlfriend. He ignored you every day, and all it did was put a sour taste in your mouth. But you couldn’t get rid of the feelings you still had.
Eventually, though, you gave up. You switched seats with Adaléne in Potions, you bribed a boy on the opposite side of the Charms classroom to swap seats with you, and you stopped eating with him during your meals. He barely even noticed.
You spent all your time in the library with your nose stuffed in some type of book, either studying for your upcoming assessments or filling up your free time with the small bit of entertainment you had left after you reluctantly walked out of Regulus’ life. A bit immature and melodramatic, some would say, but it truly pained you to see him with her every second of every day.
You would be lying if you said you didn’t have a small sliver of hope to gain attention from your best friend—or ex-best friend—but you would never admit that. To anyone.
So, instead, you remained quiet in the presence of silence and the thousand of books that surrounded you, as well as a few other students in your year. 
After a while, you stepped outside the library to find a drink and quench your thirst, but your belongings were left sitting on the table. It only took you five minutes. You only stepped in the Great Hall for a minute and grabbed a Goblet. You didn’t notice that Regulus and Adaléne were gone, nor would you have cared even if you did notice. 
You weren’t even gone for that long.
But it was long enough for you to find the two missing people sitting at the table your belongings were at, and it was definitely long enough for them to be kissing shamelessly.
A scowl crossed your lips before you eventually mucked up the courage to walk over to your table and grab your things, preferably unnoticed by the obnoxious couple.
Regulus recognized your heavy footsteps even with his eyes closed and his lips on another girl’s, just as quickly as he recognized your things that lay on the table opposite of their seats.
Your head was a flurry of anger, annoyance, and agony all rolled up into one. You were hurting just as bad as you were when you first found them all those weeks ago in the Slytherin dungeons, and you had no idea how to make it go away. 
Your heart was beating as fast as the pain was shooting through you, your emotional pain translating into physical pain somewhere in your brain—possibly the same place you came up with the brilliant idea to fall for your best friend, who would never, ever, fall in love with you.
You held your breath in and squinted your eyes shut for a few seconds. Looping your arm through your bag and stuffing your borrowed books into its cotton material, you picked up your papers from your earlier classes and walked away. Your head was held high, and your body radiated confidence, but all you were feeling on the inside was dread and pain. Just being around Regulus and being unable to speak to him (mostly due to your own pride and embarrassment) was enough torture to last you years worth of suffering.
The curly-haired boy pulled away from Adaléne’s touch and sighed into her lips. She took it as a content sigh, but he knew what it really meant. While he pretended like he didn’t notice you hastily grabbing your things, everything about you was flooding his senses.
Your perfume overpowered his girlfriend’s by a large margin, even though he was pressed up against her instead of you. Or maybe he was just imagining it because he wished he was with you instead.
The doors to the library shut with a soft echo, signaling that you’d completely left the vicinity.
Adaléne leaned closer to Regulus’ face to resume their kiss, but he dipped his head away and squinted his eyes shut. Letting out a small exhale, he pushed himself off his seat and straightened the collar of his robe, gently pushing his girlfriend back down when she was beginning to stand up. 
“No, no, stay,” he spoke gently despite the strong fire burning behind his eyes. “You need to study. I just have a headache.”
Adaléne furrowed her eyebrows and began to stand up again. “I will take care of you—“
“Ada, I’ll be fine. Focus on your studies.” Regulus pursed a smile and pressed a kiss onto his girlfriend’s forehead before leaving the library. 
Immediately, he heaved the doors open and followed the faint sound of your footsteps, leading him to the dungeons and eventually, the Slytherin common room. You made it to your dorm room before the boy could catch you, so he used the lost time to his advantage and hurried to his own dorm room.
He could finally make it up to you.
And so, with that thought etched into his mind, he grabbed the bookmark that he had so carefully looked over for the past few weeks and held it gently in his hand. 
Pushing his door open, Regulus flattened his robes against his body and briskly walked to your dorm room, rapping his knuckles against the hard surface of your door. After a few seconds and a bit of muffled shuffling behind the thick material of the dorm room walls, you finally opened the door with glossy eyes.
Those same glossy eyes shot open at the mere sight of the dark-haired boy, your hands immediately coming up to your face to wipe away any stray tears that may have fallen without your notice. “Regulus,” you spoke breathlessly, a shaky exhale leaving your mouth. “What are you doing here?”
Before everything that happened, you would have never even thought to ask Regulus what he was doing at your dorm room door. In fact, he wouldn’t even have to knock. He could’ve just walked in wordlessly, and no one would’ve said a thing; not even your roommates (if they were there).
But things change. They did change.
“I—“ he sighed. “I just wanted to drop your bookmark off. I know it’s your favorite one, so you must’ve been looking for it for some time, yeah?”
You tried your hardest to hide the joy that creeped onto your face once you locked eyes with your beloved bookmark, not wanting to show any drastic emotions in front of the boy you used to call your best friend. “Thank you,” you muttered, taking the green ribbon from the boy’s hands. “Was that all you came here for?”
You could see different waves of emotion wash up on Regulus’ face, holding back the comments that were building up inside of you. 
Eventually, he spoke with great reluctance, “No. I actually wanted to talk to you about some things, if that’s alright with you.” 
Pursing your lips and contemplating how detrimental this would be to your relationship, you ultimately nodded your head and swung the door open a bit more, allowing him into the dormitory with a hesitant expression. 
You both sat on the edge of your bed, your posture perfect and proper, sitting as if you were a robot. You were clearly on edge, and your body language said everything. It made Regulus all the more uneasy, seeing your uncomfortable stiffness fill the room with even more tension than before. All he wished was for you to flop on the bed with a relaxed smile, to go back to when you trusted each other with your lives.
“So,” you began, “what did you want to talk about?”
The boy remained silent for a few seconds, trying to find the right words. It felt like everything was slipping just off the tip of his tongue. “I don’t really know how to say this,” he trailed off. “I, uhm, don’t think Adaléne’s the right girl for me.” He wrung his hands together, a nervous habit he’d been attached to since you were both small children.
A strained laugh slipped past your lips. “I don’t understand what this has to do with me, Regulus. I’m sorry to hear that, but I don’t know what you expect me to do.”
“There is a girl that’s right for me, and I know it,” he began, locking eyes with you. 
You frowned. You knew where this was going, and you didn’t want it to happen. “This has nothing to do with me. I don’t know why you’re telling me this.”
“You do know why I’m telling you this.”
“No, I really don’t!”
“Yes, you do!” He was beginning to become impatient, and you could tell by his voice.
“I don’t!” You bit back in a frustrated tone.
And then, he finally snapped. “I love you! I don’t love Adaléne, I never did! I don’t want her, I want you! I need you!”
His outburst caused a domino reaction, immediately unlocking a new level of rage you didn’t know you had inside you. “You ‘need me’?” You laughed humorlessly. “Is this a joke?”
Regulus’ face immediately fell, “No, it’s not a joke! I would never joke about this—“
“You don’t get to throw away the years we had for a new girl and then expect me to take you in when you come crawling back and tell me that you ‘don’t want her’. I’m not a fucking second choice, Regulus!” You spat, anger bubbling inside you. “You didn’t even try to talk to me or come find me! You just ran off with her because she was your newest toy to play with! You didn’t even notice how I kept trying to keep contact with you! I waited and waited for you to come back and apologize, to tell me that you were sorry for ignoring me! But you didn’t.”
The boy stuttered, shocked by your sudden burst of anger, “I—look—I’m—I’m sorry, I really am.”
“‘Sorry’? ‘Sorry’ doesn’t mean anything! You can say sorry for the shit you did, but it’s not going to fix a thing! You replaced me with the snap of your finger, Regulus! I’ve loved you since we were eleven, and you didn’t even hesitate to leave me for some girl you’d just met!” Tears streamed down your face, but you could’ve given less fucks. “Why was she so much better, huh? What did she have that I didn’t? What did she do that was so much better than everything I did?”
Regulus was left speechless.
“Do you even know what I’ve done for you? Do you even care for the things I’ve done? Do you?” You harshly pushed your hands against the boy’s chest, causing him to lean backwards and fall onto the post of your bed. “Whenever your parents tortured you, I was the one that was there for you! When your father was drunk off his arse every night, and your mother sided with him, I helped you! When Sirius left you all alone with your parents, I stayed with you that whole night! When you came to me with a black eye and bruises all over your body, I tended to you! It was me! Not Adaléne! Me! It was always me!”
Your cheeks were flushed, your chest heaving from the pained speech that you practically screamed out. Tear stains ran down your cheeks and your chin, your makeup now effectively ruined. You took a few deep breaths to calm yourself down before speaking through gritted teeth, “So don’t tell me you ‘love’ me. Because we both know that’s a lie. Now, please, get out of my dorm.”
Regulus knew there was no point in arguing. He ruined your friendship, your relationship, and there was no going back from that. 
So, with a heavy heart, he slowly pushed himself off your bed. He thought twice to ask you if you could still be friends after all this, but only a fool would think such an instance would be possible.
And after one last glance at your broken figure, he walked out of your dorm room, closed the door, and pretended he couldn’t hear the violent sobs that racked your body from the unbearable pain only he could have caused you. 
tags: @thatonegayloser616
114 notes · View notes
leosmasktails · 11 months
Text
By popular demand of @eoncintran & @skye-minecraftyt-blog, and probably some other people, I bring you part two!
(I am so sorry this took forever to finish, I was having so much trouble ending it so I hope you enjoy it!!!)
Part 1
Disclaimer: This is a tickle fic so if you’re not into that just scroll por favor (everything is platonic and meant to be family fluff lmao-)
Warnings: prolly just cussing and a bunch of fluff
Word Count: 1,981
————————————————————————
That Brought Me Back : Part 2
“Okay, Peepaw,” Leo released Casey and cracked his knuckles for dramatic effect.
“Your turn.”
“Peepaw?” Leon snorted at the nickname his younger self had given him. He couldn’t even lie, it was pretty funny.
He needed to stop fueling that ego of his though.
The three teens paused their attack plans, waiting to see how this would play out.
“Yeah, cause you’re old.” Leo smirked at the visible change on Leon’s face, standing up and dusting himself off.
“I’m only like, forty, kid.” Leon shot back and rose to his feet as well, adding to the playful tension that Leo was so clearly wanting to build up.
“See? You’re so old it took you a billion years to do basic math!” Leo dragged on, hitting a nerve in the older slider.
“Okay- First of all, pipsqueak, it took me less than five seconds to do basic math, and second of all, we didn’t really have time to keep track of birthdays in the apocalypse.” Leon stepped forward, firmly planting his foot on the ground.
“Sounds like a skill issue on your part, abuelo.” The teen shrugged, his smug look driving Leon insane at this point.
“We are literally the same person.” Leon stepped forward once more, the younger Leo now shuffling himself backwards.
“So, you mean I’m going to look like that when I’m forty?” A look of disgust took over his face.
“Ooh, that’s gotta sting.” Mikey’s little comment could be heard over the silence that suddenly struck the room.
Casey and Mikey had remained seated on the ground this whole time, eyes darting back and forth as if they were watching a tennis match.
The red-eared sliders paid no attention to the two sitting on the ground, keeping fierce eye contact with one another.
Leon could read what this kid wanted crystal clear. As much as it pained him to do it, he gave in.
Little Leo wanted to start a fight? So be it.
“Alright, c’mere you little goblin!” Leon charged at Leo, sending the boy into a giggle fit almost instantly as he sprinted around the room.
“Noho! Get bahack you balding, elderly mahan!” Leo screamed and began ducking under various obstacles to try to slow Leon down.
“We’re all bald, kid!” Leon huffed as he quickly blew past the obstacles and remained right on Leo’s tail.
For a big turtle, he was surprisingly agile.
Leo never would have expected that being chased by himself would be so terrifying. Now he knew how Mikey and Donnie felt.
Leo had to focus, Leon was gaining on him and he-
“Gotcha!” Leon grabbed Leo by his midsection, a surprised shriek escaped the teen’s lips.
Leon picked up Leo with ease, hoisting him into the air so that the back of Leo’s shell was pressed up against his shoulder. Leo attempted to lean forward and drop to the ground but Leon wasn’t allowing him, holding him firmly in place with his arm.
Leo began to pry Leon’s hand off of his plastron, struggling to lift even his fingers from his shell.
“Whatcha doing up there, huh?” Leon walked back to where they were previously standing.
“Trying to gehet your fat, ugly fihingers off of mehee!” Leo giggled through gritted teeth.
“You’re not in the position to be insulting me, kid.” Leon scribbled his fingers on Leo’s plastron, earning a couple of childish squeals from the younger slider.
Leon grabbed Leo from his shoulder almost like a football, carrying him under an arm as he took a seat on the floor. He expertly pinned his younger self in-between his legs so that his shell was snugly secured. Leo pushed at the older’s knee, struggling to get himself out of the grip and kicking his heels against the ground for more traction.
Leo glanced at the older slider, who was leaning back on his one arm and enjoying watching Leo attempt to escape from his trap with a shit-eating grin plastered across his face.
Leo’s brain scrambled to produce an idea that would get him out of this mess.
He couldn’t think of a quick solution, unless…
His mind went to something that not even his brothers knew about him.
Yeah, that could work…
Leo stopped struggling and moved his hands to a spot on Leon’s thigh, the older slider’s eyes started to go wide.
He wouldn’t-
He did.
Leo squeezed the spot rapidly and Leon scrambled to grab the kid’s hands, his eyes shooting up to see Casey and Mikey’s mouths gaping open in shock.
Leon looked back down at his younger counterpart, who was now giggling sheepishly as he tugged at his hands that were in Leon’s iron grip.
“Alright, Leonardo,” Leon smirked, “Let’s see if you can take what you dish out.” He let go of Leo’s hands and quickly began squeezing the spot that Leo had just exposed.
The reaction was almost instant, high pitched laughter exploded from the younger turtle. He threw his head back and kicked his legs around wildly, his struggle proving useless against Leon as he wasn’t being affected by his movement whatsoever.
“Wait a minute,” Mikey’s brows furrowed at this new piece of information, “Since when was that a spot?”
“Since always,” Leon smirked, “I honestly don’t know how you guys didn’t find out about this one.”
“STOHOP GIVING HIM MOHORE IDEAS!” Leo shrieked, falling into another round of deep giggles when Leon squeezed a little harder.
“Bud, you did this to us, not me!” Leon chuckled, he never realized how contagious his own laughter was.
“CAHASEY! MIKE! HAHELP MEHEEHEE-” Leo managed to spit out through his laughter.
Leon whipped his head to Casey’s direction.
“Casey Jones Junior, don’t you dare.” Leon threatened, glaring playful daggers at his mentee.
Casey’s eyes grew wide at his threat, contemplating what he was about to do.
Casey let a tiny smirk take over his face.
“I’m sorry, Sensei,” the boy winced and looked back at Mikey, making sure they were on the same page, “but it’s payback time!”
The next thing Leon knew, he was knocked over by the force of two teenagers crashing into him, letting out a winded laugh.
Leo was set free upon the impact of his brother and Casey jumping his attacker, rolling away from the action to give himself a breather.
“Get him!” Mikey yelled, immediately going for Leon’s underarms as Casey scribbled the sides of Leo’s shell.
Leon was fighting the laughter that was bubbling up in his throat, not allowing the teens to have the satisfaction of what they wanted.
“He’s using the tactic!” Casey shouted, turning to Leo, “Leo! We need you!”
Leo let a slow grin take over his face, much like the one Leon had worn minutes before.
Leo stood up and menacingly walked over to the older slider, towering over him as he sat on top of his legs.
“Like I said before, Peepaw,” Leo emphasized the nickname, placing his hands on the spot on Leon’s thighs that drove the both of them crazy, “It’s your turn.”
And with that Leo began his attack on Leon, whose eyes widened at the new addition to the onslaught as he bucked and kicked wildly, his giggles coming out choked and gravely.
“Aww, c’mon grandpa! You gotta let it out!” Leo sneered.
“I wouhould- rather dihie!” Leon growled through gritted teeth, unable to fight the growing urge.
“Sensei, don’t say that.” Casey scolded, continuing scratching along his shell.
Leo rolled his eyes.
“Dude, c’mon, laugh already!” He moved his fingers up every so slightly, and with enough force, triggered a response in Leon’s nervous system.
“FUHUCK! GEHET OFF!” Leon’s giggles practically exploded from his chest, the three teen’s faces lighting up instantly, “LEHEO PLEHEHEASE!” Leon managed to spit out.
“Aww, they laugh the same!” Casey grinned down at Leon’s smiling face. He couldn’t remember the last time he had seen his Sensei laugh like this. It was nice.
Both slider’s cheeks went pink at Casey’s comment, leaving Leo too flustered to continue in aiding Casey and Mikey in attacking Leon.
Leo sat back on Leon’s legs as best he could with all of the kicking. He made eye contact with Leon, giving him a ‘better you than me’ look and smirking.
The look alone sent Leon into another giggle fit. Leo broke out into a full on grin, watching as his older counterpart was left in stitches by the hands of the two teens.
As fun as it was, he could tell Leon was reaching his limit. He guessed he would be the responsible leader today.
“Okay, team, we can take a break from killing the old man for now. Peepaw needs to breathe!” Leo sat forwards and grabbed both Casey and Mikey’s shoulders.
Casey and Mikey pulled away from the older slider, sitting back as Leon instantly brought his arm up to his torso to protect himself.
“Sensei? We didn’t kill you did we?” Casey poked his shell, making Leon jump and grab Casey’s hand.
“Cahase!” Leon growled before letting his head fall back to the ground again, unable to keep the dumb smile off of his face.
Leon adjusted his grip but didn’t let go of the kid’s hand. Casey didn’t seem to mind, in fact, he also adjusted his grip to match Leon’s.
“Are you good?” Mikey rested his chin on his arms, placing them on top of Leon’s plastron as a genuine smile painted his face.
“Yeah, I’m okay, Mike.” Leon sighed happily, he couldn’t even lie that he thought about these moments with his brothers more than he’d like to admit. “I would give you head pats but I currently only have one arm.”
“That’s alright,” Mikey closed his eyes cheerfully, “Just being here with you suffices!”
Gosh this kid was too sweet. He never grew out of his sweet side either. Yes, Dr. Delicate Touch made his appearances, but Mikey had always been his cheerful little brother. He knew how to make anyone smile.
“You better be happy I spared you there, buddy, I could have just let them murder you.” Leo jokingly crossed his arms over his plastron, closing his eyes as he nodded.
“Oh, don’t even, you little shit!” Leon propped his legs up, propelling Leo backwards. Leo giggled childishly, rolling to a stop before getting up and resting his elbows on Leon’s knees.
“I’m gonna get you guys back someday,” Leon rolled his eyes fondly, “But today is not that day.” He admitted defeat for now.
“We’re okay with that.” Casey grinned, squeezing his sensei’s hand before letting go.
“Hey, do you guys wanna order a pizza and watch a movie?” Leo asked as he used Leon’s knees to stand up, his stomach growling softly. Mikey perked his head, nodding excitedly.
“Pizza sounds great, little me.” Leon sat up, reaching his arm into the air and making a grabby motion with his hand, “Help me up, will you?”
“I got you, old man,” Leo took his hand and pulled him up.
“Again, not that old.” Leon rolled his eyes, shoving his younger counterpart’s head down.
“Ok what kinda pizzas do we want tonight guys?” Mikey asked, following behind the others as they made their way into the other room.
“Let’s go ask Donnie and Raph what kinds they want, and then we can all have a movie night.” Leon suggested, putting his hand on Casey’s shoulder and pulling him into his side.
“You lowkey be a genius sometimes, older me.” Leo put his arms behind his head.
“Why thank you,” Leon matched his energy, making the other turtles and Casey chuckle as they left the room.
Moments like these made life worth living, and Leon promised his brothers he would keep going for them.
He might have lost himself in the beginning, but eventually, the kids he could now call his younger brothers changed that.
They brought him back.
137 notes · View notes
wayhavenots · 4 months
Note
A commentary track for You will surely be the death of me would be amazing 👀
Thank you!!! :) Below the cut because it got long haha.
You will surely be the death of me
First: This was written for Wayhaven Frights (prompt: dawn) and for Fictober (prompt: I choose you). It's so fun to come back to it a year later! A prompt-related idea I wanted to incorporate but didn't is that Dawn is Avery's middle name.
Second: The title comes from the song Like the Dawn by The Oh Hellos, which is a retelling of the creation of Eve from the perspective of Adam. It's a very pretty song about finding someone who was (literally) made for you, that person lighting up your world like the dawn...even if they will ultimately be your downfall (the line which is the title).
Avery sips from her travel mug as she watches the dark sky fade to navy blue, a promise of warmth and light just over the horizon. But for now, it is chilly on this rooftop. She sets down the drink and huddles into Nate, head tucking into his chest and arms snaking underneath his coat and around his waist. "Cold," she explains.
For once, I actually paid attention to imagery here, Nate being a source of warmth and light just like the slowly rising sun.
She tilts her head back to observe his handsome face—dark eyes gazing back at her, a smile on his lips. She's not sure if she believes him, if she's a sufficient distraction from whatever nightmare left him so shaken this morning. Something from his past, something he’s carried with him for three hundred years. Something he doesn’t want to talk about.  “I’m so sorry for waking you,” he said when he stopped shaking, his smile forced. “But it seems we are just in time to watch the sunrise.” It's the type of activity that wouldn’t have occurred to Avery, despite her proclivity for staring at the sky. Her fascination lies with bodies much farther away—with the exception of Nate, of course. 
I liked the idea of Nate being the one to suggest looking at the sunrise, even though Avery is the one who's always looking at the sky, the one who's always been so fascinated with stars. I think Nate suggests it as a way of trying to salvage the morning after his nightmare, a little bit of a way to apologize for waking up Avery, a little bit of a way to ground himself back in the present.
“There’s this theory about the Sun," she says, to fill the silence. "That it had a binary twin once. Another star orbiting around the same center of mass. They call it Nemesis.” “An evil twin, then," comments Nate, with a smile she hears rather than sees. “For kicking an asteroid into the Earth and killing the dinosaurs, I guess,” she explains. “There’s no evidence for Nemesis. If it was ever close enough to do any damage, it isn’t anymore, and never will be again.” She thinks about his past, still kicking asteroids into his life. Her hands venture out of the warmth to hold onto his, which are linked around her shoulders. “But we know that most stars occur in binary systems, and we suspect that almost all stars started out with a far-away companion. They get closer, or they break apart, leaving single stars. It's a mathematical model that explains some observations, anyway." “Oh, I like that. Like soulmates."
I had a lot of help from Seren about the astronomy here! Since Avery's science is astronomy and I am not an astronomer, I'm always getting these little ideas for astronomy-themed metaphors and I never know if they're total nonsense (and then I ask Seren who is very kind about answering my questions)! In this case, linking binary stars to the concept of soulmates, and then trying to connect that organically to the sunrise by bringing up the Sun's theoretical once-but-no-longer binary companion.
It’s such a Nate thing to say in response to her rambling; she has to smile. “Do you believe in that? Soulmates?” "Yes, I think so. More so now." She doesn't miss the implication in his voice, one that might have sent her panicking not too long ago. "Do you?" Avery doesn’t answer for a moment. It’s certainly a model which would explain, well, this. Them. Feelings she never felt so deeply, like he's the warm soft glow of a brand new day. But there's something sad in that, too. A hundred years from now, she will be long gone; or worse, a memory that wakes him in the middle of the night, alone.
I've changed a lot about how I view Avery and her feelings about love. I used to view her as being afraid of love or not believing in love, and that Nate would change that (but that narrative feels kind of icky to me now tbh). I think this fic and this passage really captures her bigger fear, which is that her love will hurt Nate. It's something she saw happen to Rebecca after Rook's death. Maybe they were soulmates...but maybe that was a bad thing.
"No," she finally decides. "I chose you, and you chose me, and gravity has nothing to do with it."
I'm very proud of this line. I'm not even sure if Avery really believes what she's saying, exactly; she decides. She knows that she wants Nate to believe it, that there isn't anything special about her, that when she's gone he'll be able to move on.
But he smiles to see her looking back at him and angles his face towards hers. Her heart skips a beat. He could keep her warm from light-years away, and she feels lucky to be here in his orbit, if only for a few decades.
Since writing this, I've definitely decided that Avery will become a vampire one day. She never wants to put Nate through losing someone. I really liked writing with this sense of temporariness haunting the narrative, how it turns everything a little bittersweet. But it's occurred to me since then that Avery wouldn't leave it at that, if science has given her a way to stay with Nate forever.
“I can’t decide which theory I like better," says Nate thoughtfully. “Because certainly, I chose you. And I choose you.” He dips his head low to a brush a kiss over her lips. “But, my sweet astronomer, my dearest heart, there could be no other choice.” 
I really liked this bit too. Nate the diplomat finding the common ground between their differing viewpoints, even though (he doesn't realize) it kind of plays into Avery's fears. And being so smooth all the while.
Words rise to her throat:  I am just the beginning for you, Nate.  I think you will choose someone else some day.  I hope that you do.
I'm pretty sure I wrote these lines way before I saw any of the prompt lists or had any corresponding fic idea; I think these lines were just languishing in some Tumblr draft and dying to be used.
But the words evaporate in the heat of the kiss that follows, and she lets them go. There is no use in thoughts orbiting around the inevitable future, no point in casting her eye skyward, when her universe does not need more than him or now.
I think Avery started looking at the stars in part because they were always there, even when her mother wasn't. So she's always looked up and out and away. And it's maybe the same reason she's so preoccupied with the distant future. It's just not in her nature to narrow her focus to the here and now.
But this whole sunrise-watching activity is spurred by Nate trying to shake off the memories of his past.
So in the end here, they kind of meet in the present. Avery sees the beauty in what is close and doesn't worry about what is far away. What she's been looking for out there is right with her now.
2 notes · View notes
wicked-berry · 2 years
Text
ke
You know what...back in 2018, a year after orphan black had ended we were introduced to a new series called ‘killing eve’ by the same network. I was one of the few people who had watched the series from the very 1st ep without spoilers and without a single clue of how exactly they would move the plot forward. Because of that i was genuinely caught off guard with every twist and turn of a masterfully crafted script, an abundant production and of course those stellar performances of sandra and jodie we got to witness the past 4 years. By the end of 1x05 i was hooked and then came 1x08, which really proved KE to be a ‘never been done before’,one kind of a show to me. Really it was nothing like what i had watched before. It subverted all expectations and set the standard very high right from the beginning. All the while a 2nd season was already approved by then, which means they knew they had successful material on their hands (S1 was impeccable, really faultless for me, praise PWB). As of the 2nd season, and after PWB had left, production changed the lead writer every season and as it was expected that has impacted the series a lot. PWB or not they shouldn't had changed the lead writer EVERY season, given that everyone has a different picture in their head of how this could go. The fast pace has always been an absolute advantage of KE that didn't allow you to take your eyes off the screen because you could lose important scenes and clues. Then they added all those dull characters and subplots that took almost half of the screen time and most importantly kept the main characters apart for most of the time and that took half the edge from the show. Season 3 had some good moments but they definitely wasted much time.
      FINALE and s4
I felt from the start they wouldn’t go with more than 5 seasons and that was ok with me, cause i knew they would have wanted to end the show on a high and not stretch it. After the pandemic and the news of a last s4 i was so sure that the time wouldn’t be enough to take care of all the loose ends and my expectations dropped but i was hopeful that after how s3 ended, with villaneve together, they were all set to wrap everything up. S4 started to unfold and i was taken aback by the inexplicable separation of eve and v, the non existant reunion after THE WHOLE SEASON, the infinite amount of lost time combined with the forced plot of the 12. Following all that, came the worst ending i could have hoped for. When it came to the finale of KE i was always prepared for death and destruction and i would definitely take 2 deaths as a dramatic and well thought “bad” ending. If anyone, 4 years ago, would tell me how badly written, executed and butchered the epilogue would be, i would have laughed just as i laughed when the title ‘THE END’ dropped.I am sorry but that was so insulting to all the viewers who actually cared about the series and paid attention to the details. They kind of turned it into a parody. Aside from
the dramatic and depressing scenes, from a narrative standpoint, the writing choices were insane. Not connected, not a single question answered, full of plot holes and rushed. I am still not able to comprehend the thought process they followed that led to this. Its not even the sad part and the last minutes but the complete abandonment of all reason. At last, nothing made sense, i’m in denial and i don't want to believe they chose deliberately this awful ending (at least without the pressure of the production) that literally noone could justify, let alone acknowledge it as “skillful writing”. A degrading end for an exceptional series truly.
66 notes · View notes
crimsonblackrose · 2 years
Text
I’m sorry first off the wisteria...in LA. Like Daniel come on man. How much water does it take to keep those things blooming? I love that Anthony’s first response to Johnny who he doesn’t know is “Kick his ass dad” which by the way Daniel, this is the first time this kid has gotten up other than to see his grandma and away from his game. He clearly just wants to watch you be the badass he knows you are. I love this blood thirsty kid. I love Amanda being like no you idiots even though Anthony is like I don’t know who this is but this is the best morning of my life. I’m sorry wait they’re doing a practice test on Saturday? Miguel why are you even there when you can’t focus? Go home and sleep dude I know they do those practice tests more than once. She called it a family dinner dude. Don’t be jealous of Robby. Also he said he was thinking about the tournament and she swerved to the test. These two kind of suck at communicating...you wonder who creates this. Johnny’s car just keeps getting destroyed by LaRusso’s. The symbolism here is painful. Because it’s a firebird and the whole point of it is that Johnny’s trying desperately to rise from the ashes and the LaRusso’s keep stopping him. I mean that’s only one way to look at it. But ouch. I like that Anthony is like always on his phone except when Johnny is there. And then it’s like here’s a lion he wants to provoke. Hawk went to 1000%. Kid, chill. How did Johnny not hear Daniel say Robby? How much money does Eli have? He’s having someone dye his hair, tattoos aren’t cheap and he’s getting it touched up to match his hair. Johnny fidgeting like he’s on a date. Like he’s been wanting to hang out with Daniel for a long time.
Aisha, voice of reason. Always. Sam, you literally were just caught lying about a car accident. You should be grounded. Just tell your mom you need to let your friends know you’re offline for the time being...aka your boyfriend.  Or like you’d think Amanda would be like yo why does everyone keep calling? Wonder if there’s an emergency. The heart broken “you gotta be kidding me” That Johnny said. T_T Johnny feeling awful but still showing up for these kids. How did Robby even know about the All Valley? I mean I’m sure he knew, but like how did he sign up since Miyagi-do doesn’t have a team. Like why would he even do that? Like did he do that in advance? I thought you had to do so a long time ago and wasn’t like part of the whole plot of TKK3 that you can’t just show up unaffiliated with a dojo? Who let some kid show up and be like I’d like to compete and was like I’m not paid to be here I don’t care, sure kid? They should be fired. Daniel tries to be all humble but he low-key loves all of the attention and I feel like that fits with the movies and the results of him winning and having people come up to him for signatures. Also if Daniel is up on the banners....why isn’t Johnny? Like even for his past two? I don’t get why Johnny doesn’t get any of the same accolades or fanfaire. I mean sure he probably hasn’t been nearly as involved as Daniel, but still. Johnny has a flair for the dramatic. Is it left over from when he learned magic? Who let Robby into this tournament? Like what did he say? How did he prove he could be in this tournament? I want a video of this. I need proof. Johnny may be a mess but he seriously adores these kids. Him yelling good job Mrs. Robbinson and being so concerned about Robby because he doesn’t know if Robby is prepared to be in a tournament or why he isn’t under Miyagi-do 50 years and Aisha is the first girl is really really sad. You know what Xander’s speech reminds me of? Silver’s speech. I know it’s not meant to but it does sound like Silver’s KK3 speech. Aisha and Sam could’ve mended the Cobra Kai Miyagi-do rift. If only she’d picked friendship. You know what, Amanda’s so what if he lied? really shows that Daniel never talked to her about Silver or Kreese. Does that mean he only talked about Johnny? Did he mention the fight to the death in Okinawa? Poor Robby. T_T His sensei abandoned him after he tried to defend him. Hawk is super sensitive to any comments on his features. Get back at Johnny for what? Like I get it. But at the same point...wouldn’t you want him out of your point then? And like the best way to do that is to ignore him? Let him do his own thing. Robby look is like what on earth is this guy doing? I picked him to be my sensei? Why’s he rubbing his hands. Okay bringing someone else to his party is kind of weird. Does Robby mean facing Johnny or Miguel? You would think, okay I’m sorry, but the fanfare they give Daniel “former champion” has to be because he’s never missed an annual meeting right? Like you’d think they’d also know who Johnny is. They both technically have the same amount of first place trophies and are from the same era. Also like how does everyone know him? Because of his ads? Is he a local celeb? If so then why isn’t everyone talking about his freak out at the boba shop? Because surely gossip in LA would be like yo, this guy...Also omg poor Johnny. His son is with his enemy and then shows up and isn’t with his enemy and then bam, last minute is again? If anyone feels like their heads being messed with at this moment it’s gotta be him. Also that dig of someone’s got to be there for him. Dude. Dude. Rude. i That screech when he says no mercy and realizes that this guy is going to badly hurt his son. Man. You took a sweet baby boy who tried to teach you the right thing and made him a little bad. T_T Also the way Miguel just grabs Johnny and keeps him from seeing Robby. Miguel how did you stop him? You’d think he’d be too strong to be swayed. And how like Johnny won but feels awful about it. Despite his students being so happy and proud. </3 Eli I think I will join your gang. Demetri, so accurate but damn. Omg Daniel. Stooopp. You literally said nice things about Robby’s dad and Robby was like Dad’s happy, he apologized, sure my shoulder hurts but you know what I’m disappointed and I’m okay. There’s a moment of healing and pride in Robby. Let him have that but no Daniel’s like I’M PISSED over my dead body. Don’t kidnap this child! I believe this counts as kidnapping. Robby this is where you bury your dead bodies or something. I love this. Daniel. You do realize you’ve terrified this boy by kidnapping him and doing a 180 on Johnny that essentially is over my dead body. He truly believes you’re capable of some dark stuff. The Kreese country show down twang. I can’t. I can’t, I’m dying. Johnny just wanted a quiet night, expected to chat with Miguel and then demons show up. Omg, and Johnny though the was dead. Serioulsy thought he was dead. Daniel: your dad has a lot of demons. Demon shows up: Kreese. Like omg the imagery of him showing up at night with a cigar. Kreese way to be a creep. Nice kick Johnny. Where’d you learn that? Oh the repeat of Johnny going into the glass like Terry did. Has Johnny ever been called honorable before? T_T Now I need him and Chozen trying to become “honorable”. Daniel! Robby is injured wtf why are you having him do all this sanding and stuff?
0 notes
booksandwillowtrees · 3 years
Text
Sometimes I think my parents have a clue about my well-being regarding school and then my mom says something like “You had late assignments this quarter? But why???”.
Mom I’m sorry to inform you but I literally have not been doing well this year.
Or like she was talking about how “some kids must really be struggling with online school” and I went “yeah it’s really hard” and she went. “No, I mean the people who are really struggling with it.”
LIKE I LOVE YOU MOM BUT OH MY GOD USE SOME REASONING HERE.
2 notes · View notes
twelvegods · 2 years
Text
late night stroll
Tumblr media
pairing/s; fred weasley x fem!reader
warning/s; none
word count; 5.2k
summary; a late night stroll ends up with fred weasley discovering a rather rebellious little hufflepuff that promptly turns his world upside down. 
a/n; they call each other miss heartbreaker and mister loverboy affectionally no don’t touch me,,, anw this was supposed to be my fred fanfic’s first chapter but i changed the flow of the story now so it’s an imagine instead. a portion of this was inspired by that one fred imagine where they also bump into each other in the kitchens (i looked everywhere but can’t find it gah)
Tumblr media
the painting swung open soundlessly and a certain flash of yellow darted past, keeping high alert for any noise or movement that wasn't yours. even in your night things, the hufflepuff still sported an immense amount of house pride; bearing a yellow wool sweater and bee striped pajamas.
it had just chimed half past one in the morning at hogwarts school of witchcraft and wizardry and the castle was well put under a deep sleep. if a teacher were to catch you roaming about well after hours and sneaking out of the kitchens, it was inevitable that you'd be in detention for what could possibly be months.
probably even more if filch and that bloody cat of his were the ones to find you. everyone knew just how much he blew things out of proportion.
just like you were doing so now, robes fat and heavy, tied together to form a makeshift sack to carry the dozens of treacle tarts and pumpkin pies you'd been offered by the house elves. you really only visited the kitchens whenever you couldn't sleep, often even to do a spot of homework, and tonight was no different. usually, after a warm cup of cocoa has done its job, you'd find your eyelids grow noticeably heavy and promptly pass out.
but the best thing about being a badger was the spotless record and quite possibly the stereotype that came with it. it didn't hurt either that everybody paid more attention to the blatant rule-breaking gryffindors or the chaotic slytherins who were always looking for a fight with one another.
because of this, the hufflepuff basements were always the least patrolled after the ravenclaw towers. you found a way to always work this to your favor.
you were humming contentedly to yourself as you neared the stack of barrels leading to your common room, mind drifting elsewhere and foggy with sleep. before you could reach the barrels though, you found yourself literally stumbling into someone's chest, a soft 'oof' emitting from the both of you, and you landed flat on your behind, bag of tasty treats clutched tight to your chest to avoid spilling them all over the floor.
immediately, your blood turned ice-cold as the other person reached out a hand to help you up. before you could register the mop of tousled red hair or the freckled face, your head was bowed and you were already apologizing.
"i am so, so sorry, professor! i couldn't sleep and i just—"
"bloody hell, keep it down, would you? if you don't, an actual professor might come 'round and then we'd both be sorry."
you blinked in momentary confusion as you finally faced the stranger, who sported a massive teasing and shit-eating grin on his face. relief flooded your system when you realized you recognized the ginger.
"oh! weasley!"
"...oh?"
"yeah, you're in my year, right? along with your twin?" you wracked your brain for the name that belonged to the specific twin. "...george, was it? and you're fred?"
it was such a miniscule thing to others, but for fred weasley, the action rendered him speechless. it was a rather rare occurrence that he was identified correctly, used to having to tell people—even his own mum—of who he is. and, yeah, this girl might've probably just taken a shot in the dark at it but fred appreciated it all the same.
"uh—yeah, i'm fred."
you had recognized the weasley twin almost immediately because not only were they in your year or in a couple of your classes, but because you'd played against them and their house numerous times in quidditch. they were also known to be ruthless beaters and you could vividly remember a broken arm of yours last year no thanks to them.
you also knew that the twins were practically infamous with the constant pranks and jokes they pulled on just about everybody. there were a number of times that you were warned to stay away from them and the gryffindors entirely if you liked the color of your hair.
"by the way, what're you doing out here after hours?" the cheeky grin made its way back onto his face as fred crossed his arms. he shrugged nonchalantly. "just curious."
"i could ask you the same thing actually." you shot him an identical smile back and made to step around the boy with your robes still cradled against you, but was blocked from doing so once again. at least this time you didn't land on your ass.
you had to look up at the sixteen year old boy who, for some unfair reason, was already a head taller than you. "yes?"
"you're barefoot." fred found himself blurting, glancing down to the girl's toes which were colored a dark yellow color. probably gold if he squints.
he didn't know why he didn't let her pass. something about her intrigued him, probably something to do with the fact that he was in her year and didn't notice her until now. a rebellious gryffindor like him? surely he would've noticed.
you chuckled. "and what of it? it makes less noise that way."
fred raised an eyebrow at this. "quite the veteran, aren't you?"
"quite." you nodded officially, fiddling with your robes, which drew fred's attention. "surprised you haven't noticed actually. i've only been sneaking out every other tuesday."
fred snorted at the joke and gestured to the bundle in your arms. "snacks, i gather?"
you nodded again. "was only supposed to be a cup of cocoa but the elves insisted i take them, said i might get hungry."
you revealed the numerous tarts and pies gathered in your robes and giggled. "they were right, i'm ravishing right about now."
just then, heavy footsteps rounded the corner accompanied by the sound of a clattering lamplight. filch.
fred heard it first and quickly acted upon pure instinct. you barely had any time to react as he pulled you into a secluded alcove that fred and his brother have used on more than one occasion.
"who's there?" filch's voice called out, his cat mewling softly as he stepped into the hall. "i heard voices! show yourselves!"
if anything, fred pressed himself closer to you as you started to breathe heavily with panic. and when breathing like that in an alcove that echoed, it tended to get rather noisy, so fred slowly cupped your mouth as you stared at him with wide eyes. with his other hand, he gestured for you to be quiet and calm down.
they stayed like that for a good two minutes, just silently communicating with their eyes, before filch huffed and walked away, calling out to his cat to follow. but they waited a little more, ears straining to hear that filch's footsteps weren't coming any closer and only then did fred peek his head out to check if the coast was clear.
you peeked out as well before he could tell you to. your fingers were shaking with adrenaline and your heart was beating so fast. but you’ve done this a hundred times before? surely the pace of your heart didn’t have anything to do with the good-looking gryffindor boy in front of you?
fred turned to you, scratching the back of his neck sheepishly. "i think—"
"—we should get back to bed? yeah, yes, definitely." you nodded eagerly. "i think i'll go first."
you waved at him before he called out to you in a confused whisper. "where are you going? we're from the same house anyway so let's head back together."
"i...what?"
"i said—"
"no, i heard you. but... fred, i'm not in gryffindor." you took a moment to bask in the surprise that had fred sputtering like a fish. "i'm a hufflepuff."
you grinned as he glanced at the entrance to the hufflepuff basement a little ways away, speechless.
he couldn’t believe he didn’t piece it together, or see your house colors on your robe when you showed it to him. admittingly, it was a little dark.
at that, you turned away, tapping on the barrels until the biggest one slid open to reveal a short hallway that went down. with fred watching as you turned back around, just before entering, you waved.
"don't you remember breaking my arm during quidditch last year?"
he didn't.
and as he walked back to the gryffindor tower, fred startled with the realization that he hadn't asked for your name. he'd apparently broken some rebellious hufflepuff's arm, who was bloody fit on top of it, and he didn't even get a name.
back in the dorms, george squinted at the light that bled through the now open door as his twin walked through it. he watched fred as he collapsed on his bed face down before george smacked him with a pillow. what the hell was he sulking for?
"where's my pie?"
fred groaned into his pillow and george raised an eyebrow.
"you forgot, i take it?" he sighed and received another groan in response. “what took you so long, anyway?”
fred was saying something but with his face pressed against the pillow, it was just muffled chatter. george smacked him again. “i can’t understand you, you git.”
fred lifted his head, “i ran into a hufflepuff on the way to the kitchens,” and dropped his head back down.
in the dark, george’s face was plainly confused. “a hufflepuff? are you sure?”
fred made a sound that sounded like ‘yes’.
“alright then, what’s her name?”
fred rolled onto his back, staring at the top of his canopy bed. “i forgot to ask. and i think i insulted her by assuming she was a gryffindor.”
george frowned. “and...?”
“and,” fred huffed, sitting up and facing george’s bed in the dark. “apparently, i broke her arm during a quidditch match last year.”
“you’re joking.”
“wish i was.”
“you broke her arm and you don’t even know her name? bloody rude of you.”
“will you two shut it? i’d like to get some shut eye before i flunk transfig tomorrow, thank you very much.” lee jordan huffed in the bed next to fred’s, glaring at them in the dark before turning his back on them. “her name’s [y/n]. i commentated that match, mate. and as a matter of fact, fred, you were very rude. didn’t even apologize, not once.”
lee clicked his tongue and promptly fell back asleep.
fred looked wide eyed at george, who could tell that his twin brother already had something brewing in his head.
“whatever it is, it can wait ‘till tomorrow. i’m going to go to bed now, starving mind you.” george stage-whispered at fred and turned over.
fred just sat there in the pale moonlight filtering through his window, cooking up a plan to see you again. and apologize of course.
and so, for the entirety of the next day, fred weasley would catch your particular head of hair practically everywhere… just before you ducked out of sight.
he’d been tracking you down incessantly since breakfast, even going as far as to send underclassmen after you with an invitation to meet with him, which he has yet to hear a reply from. he didn’t understand why your face grew paler with every note. but alas, the day was only halfway through and that left plenty of chances for fred to cook up some plan to sidle right back to your side.
george and lee were particularly unsettled as to why you’ve suddenly been dropped onto fred’s radar after a chance encounter and why he was so adamant about meeting you. they wondered if he’d found yet another prank victim and could only hope that he wouldn’t have you sprouting a lizard’s tail before the yule ball. but when they asked, their confusion only skyrocketed.
“i want to ask her to the ball.” he shrugged during potions, his concentration focused entirely on the bubbling cauldron in front of him that he didn’t notice the startled look his best mates shared.
“the ball, mate?” lee queried, handing his partner the container of dried billywig stings when he asked for it. he leaned his elbows on the table as he gestured airily at the twins in front of him. “isn’t that a little, you know, coldhearted for a prank?”
“coldhearted?” fred turned, eyebrows furrowed. “why would my asking [y/n] to be my date to the ball be coldhearted? and why would i prank her?”
george tried to read his brother’s expression, only to blink in surprise at what he saw. the bloke was being genuine. “bloody hell, you’re serious? i thought you only wanted to apologize?”
“damn, what exactly happened last night?” lee gaped at the sporadic turn of events.
fred was known for being a little bit of a flirt, dating through girls as fast as hermione reads through books. just last week, he was swearing up and down that he’d go stag, saying he wanted to be the hottest bachelor available for the ladies.
fred just faced the wideye potion they were concocting, lifting a shoulder to shrug. “magic, if i had to guess.”
when his friends weren’t looking, he took the chance to glance across the room to where you stood with your partner, cedric diggory, your potion simmering and finished in front of you. he watched as you idly flipped the page of a thick textbook, talking animatedly about one of the passages with the hogwarts champion.
he watched as you huffed, mocked cedric, and tucked your hair behind your ear, then moved to eye the scar on the exposed side of your elbow, no doubt a reminder of the injury you mentioned that he'd gifted you. he winced at how much of an arsehole he probably seemed last year, where he didn’t even bother to apologize when the bludger he sent for you that ended up winning the match also ending up giving you an oblique fracture.
he knew of the details now because it was the first thing he hounded for shortly after breakfast, madam pomfrey tutting all the while.
he watched, unable to peel his eyes away, as you turned your head and met his gaze. fred barely had time to smile before you abruptly looked away, cheeks pinking. your reaction confused him; why were you acting like you didn’t know him? why hadn’t you responded to his letters?
surely, being tucked in a secluded alcove while evading possible consequences bonded you somehow?
with your face flaming, you stared at the open book in front of you, not quite digesting the text or whatever it was your best friend was trying to discuss with you. mid-sentence, cedric noticed that your eyes had glazed over and glanced towards the back of the room where fred was now openly fixated on you.
“pretty boy weasley’s staring at you again. can't believe he's been at it since breakfast.” he shook his head in disbelief as he nudged your shoulder. “what you did to get his attention, i’ll never know.”
“he calls you pretty boy diggory, too, you know. him and his twin.” you snapped, brows furrowed and cheeks still warm. “and i told you; i just bumped into him last night.”
“i’m aware they call me that, and let me rephrase; i'll never understand.” cedric then gestured at your pockets, stuffed with letters and notes from the particular ginger. “also, a ‘bump’ doesn’t receive that much attention. reckon you made quite the impression.”
you rolled your eyes, waving off his statement. “he’s going to prank me, or stand me up, whichever comes first, ced. i know it.”
“oh? how so?”
“i just do.”
cedric leaned his hip on the table, a mocking smirk evident as ever. “‘you just do’? have you asked him?”
“you don’t just ask someone if they want to prank you, you twit.” you scoffed. “correction; you don’t just ask frederick bloody weasley if he wants to prank you.”
“right, so you don’t just ask fred weasley if he wants to prank or stand you up.” he pointed out, playing along.
“that’s exactly what i said.” you glared at your best friend for making light of the situation.
he lifted his hands in surrender. “just checking.”
the conversation was cut short as professor snape started his rounds of inspecting the completed potions. since you were up at the front of the class, he approached your cauldron first, taking his time to examine the concoction. when he deemed it acceptable, he just nodded and turned his nose up, moving onto the next pair.
the warning bell tolled just as the professor finished his rounds and announced to the class. “to those with potions worthy of my approval, you may collect a few vials from them. hopefully, they’ll help you keep attentive when i’m handing out instructions, unlike mr. henley over here.”
timothy henley seemed to shrink as professor snape sneered at him, but thankfully did not take away points from your housemate. you made a mental note to hand him some of your potion later.
professor snape then turned on the weasley twins, just before you were all to move to your next class. snape eyed fred as he was still looking over in your direction. “and mr. weasley, perhaps not too attentive.”
cedric gave a loud cough, appearing to hold back laughter as your face burned even brighter.
once classes were over, you finally had time to aid cedric in his search for anything that could help him with the second task. you’d arranged to meet at the library all the way across the castle, but you remembered that you owned a couple books on underwater lore so you figured it best split up to take a detour by your dormitory.
you now ducked under the threshold of the main barrel leading out of your common room, the strap of your bookbag still digging into your shoulder from all the books weighing it down despite dropping off some stuff. as you set foot in the hallway outside of the passage leading into the hufflepuff basements, it was there that you found fred waiting, leaning against the column directly opposite you, tapping his foot.
"bit different," he spoke once he caught sight of you, looking up and around the well lit hall. "meeting you here in broad daylight, i mean. must be the lighting."
stopping dead in your tracks, you debated whether turning back was a good idea when he looked up and found you frozen with indecision. too late now. you watched as his face broke out into a smile and he walked to meet you, his long legs making short work of it.
almost as if disobeying you, your lips twitched upwards at fred's shot at a joke. you slowly started walking towards the end of the hall and found him following you. because of that, you walked faster.
"did you need something, weasley?" you kept your focus trained forward, knowing that if you looked him in the eyes, it was game over. you shifted your weight. “i’m in a little bit of a hurry.”
everything was different in the daytime. you were different in the daytime.
he glanced at your shoulder, down to your bag, and, before you could react, lifted it onto his own. “where to?”
you sputtered, reaching for your belongings, but he just ducked out of reach, a wide grin on his face. “honestly, what’s with you?”
he shrugged with the shoulder that wasn’t held down. “you weren’t responding to my letters, so i figured you preferred a more direct approach.”
“you just can’t take a hint, can you?” you sighed, resigned to the fact that this was your life now and that fred was matching your pace.
“if you bothered to read my letters, you’d know that i want you to be my date to the ball.”
“i actually did read them, but you’ll have to excuse me if i don’t plan on being humiliated any time soon.”
fred stopped walking, staring at you like you’d wounded him. “why would you be humiliated if you went with me?”
it wasn’t like you could just keep walking, cedric needed those books, so you paused as well, a little ways in front of him, and crossed your arms.
“i’m sure you’d be a great date if you were sincere, but knowing your reputation, this—” you gestured between the two of you. “—is anything but. it’s just a cruel joke.”
“a joke?” he blinked, his expression turning confused. then realization dawned upon him. “wait, what? no, i’m not—this isn’t—why would you even think that?”
you snorted, all but rolling your eyes. he was really convincing, you had to give him that. no wonder the entirety of the castle fawned over the redhead. he had charm.
“because that’s who you are, weasley. it’s what you’re known to do.”
fred stood in stunned silence while you, seeing the opportunity, took back your bookbag. he let you.
you waved as you turned your back on him and walked away. “see you around, lover boy. don’t forget to report back to your twin that your attempt at a heartless joke failed.”
he just watched you leave without another word.
once you were a good distance away, you all but ran towards the secluded nook at the farthest part of the library, one that was yours and cedric’s particular spot, ever since second year. here, light was dim and noise was at an all time low.
when you reached it, you huffed and dropped the bag—which was practically bursting at the seams now—you’ve been lugging around on the table, taking the seat across from the gray-eyed boy who looked startled to see you.
he stopped flipping through the book on the table and stared at you as you unpacked. “what are you doing here? and where’s fred?”
“hullo, [y/n]. i missed you and thank you so, so much for helping my desperate arse.” you mocked, taking the liberty of greeting yourself when cedric practically ignored the fact that you’d both agreed to meet here. you pulled out a thick textbook, made yourself comfortable, and began flipping through the pages for anything helpful.
“did something go wrong?” he asked after a beat and you looked up, frowning.
“what do you mean ‘did something go wrong?’, he tried asking me to the yule as a joke.” you scoffed, dropping your attention back to the book. “didn’t get very far, though. i saw right through him.”
cedric kept on staring.
you scowled, eyes snapping up. “what?”
he sighed, shaking his head at your cluelessness. “can’t believe you turned down a genuine date to the ball.”
“genuine?” you waved away the term. “you and i both know fred weasley doesn’t have a single genuine bone in his body.”
“let’s see,” cedric smirked, leaning back in his chair, ticking off fingers as he spoke. “he asked for my permission to take you, wrote formal letters asking you out, had them delivered, and even waited for you outside of the common room for a more direct approach, did he not?”
you gaped. “he asked you for permission? why? and why do you know he was waiting for me?”
he nodded. “simple. i just asked him if he wanted to prank or stand you up after potions, even after your protests about that. he was quite nice about it, said he wanted to get to know you better and, i quote, ‘what better way to do so than at a proper ball?’ then i merely suggested he wait you out, knowing how stubborn you can be.”
cedric watched, satisfied, as numerous emotions passed through you. “if that doesn’t scream ‘genuine’, then i don’t know what will for you.”
you sat there in stunned silence, struggling to form words as he leaned his elbows on the table, locked his hands together, and rested his chin on the tops of his knuckles, all while sporting a smug look on his face. “so remind me again why you’re here?”
“oh helga,” you breathed. “i was so heartless, i practically insulted him as i left. i’ve got to—”
you swallowed, your throating having suddenly gone desert dry. “i’ve got to apologize somehow.”
“that’s what he was trying to do, too, you know. for last year.” cedric gestured to your arm before looking back down at the book he was studying.
as if you’d been struck by lightning, you hurriedly tried to pack your things but cedric just waved you off, not even bothering to lift his head. “i’ll take care of that, you go get your man.”
you shot him a sharp look as you brushed yourself off. “he’s not my man, ced.”
he looked up when your steps faded away and watched fondly as you rushed out of the library, shaking his head with a small smile on his face. ever since last year, you and fred had been dancing just outside of each other’s social circles, and cedric knew it was a matter of time before you met.
he knew you’d caught fred’s eye long before today, having gotten to know fred during the summer. he also knew just how much you liked fred, even after the quidditch match last year, as much as you tried to repress those feelings.
“not yet anyway,” he muttered to himself. then he turned back to the stacked assortment of books that were supposed to help him breathe underwater and hopefully not drown him. “now, where were we?”
meanwhile, you’re now hustling up the staircase towards the gryffindor tower, the only place that makes sense at the moment because you didn’t know enough about fred to know his usual whereabouts, or know enough about fred, period. but it seemed like luck was on your side as his towering height seemed to make him stick out like a sore thumb amongst the rest of the students headed back to their common room.
“weasley!” you called, waving your arms in the air like a lunatic and attracting the attention of literally everyone around you. “weasley, hey!”
his hulking figure seemed to slow to a halt, eventually turning around to meet your determined gaze. he had seemed to be in a conversation with someone, but you couldn’t see who because from what you could tell, they were much, much shorter than he was. only when you saw the head of flowing red hair did you figure that he was talking to ginny weasley, his younger sister.
a small smile seemed to grow on his lips at the sight of you approaching him as well as a prideful glint that shone brightly in his eyes when he crossed his arms. “well, well, well, if it isn’t miss heartbreaker herself.”
you finally came to a stand in front of him, smiling in greeting at his sister, who smiled back as she not-so-subtly elbowed her brother in the ribs. he yelped at the gesture and rubbed at his side, giving ginny a ‘what the bloody hell was that for?’ look.
“looks like you won’t be needing any more advice, brother, so i’ll be taking my leave.” she shot you one last smile before walking towards the direction of the fat lady’s portrait.
as soon as she was gone, you turned to fred and blurted out the first thing that came to mind; an apology. “i’m so sorry for reacting the way i did, i should have listened to you, not to mention i was absolutely judgemental towards you—”
you were so focused on getting your own apology out, you didn’t realize that fred was doing the exact same thing at the exact same time.
“sorry about your arm, i knew how much of a jerk i was then, and i guess i should’ve been a little more aware of how i might’ve come across earlier—”
both of you stopped, bringing the somewhat one sided conversation to a halt, and practically tripped over what to say next.
“sorry, what were you saying?”
“no, you go, i interrupted, i’m sorry.”
“it’s fine! i just—”
with a dry bout of laughter, you cut yourself off, running a hand through your hair. fred’s eyes followed the movement. “we’re going in circles.”
fred seemed to pick up his confidence once again. “well, i’d like to dance circles around you, [y/l/n]. at the ball.”
you blinked up at him. “you know my name? i don’t remember telling you.”
“i have my ways.” fred’s grin was wider than the cheshire cat. you rolled your eyes as he chuckled. “right, well, i need to formally and properly apologize for breaking your arm.”
“what, this thing?” you momentarily touched your scar and waved off the statement. “old news, weasley.”
fred then gestured down the corridor, meaning to walk with you, and you did just that back down the steps. “what made you come see me? or change your mind about me rather?”
“cedric. made me realize i treated you unfairly.” you hummed, turning at him with a sorry look on your face. “sorry again about what i said.”
“sticks and stones.” he waved it off, shrugging. “believe it or not, you’re not the first person to react that way towards me.”
“oh, i believe it.” you laughed, absentmindedly touching your hand to his bicep. almost immediately, you felt the muscles flex just beneath your fingertips, and your face flared red. “sorry.”
“s’alright.” he shrugged and offered up the rest of his arm. you took it. “consider this practice for the ball.”
“i haven’t said yes, you know.” you teased, knowing full well you were going with him. you wanted to get to know the guy you spent huddled with in a secluded alcove a little better.
fred seemed to follow your train of thought, a mischievous look crossing his face. “shall we find another alcove and see if i can convince you?”
to anyone else, it looked like another hogwarts couple strolling their way through the courtyard. but to each other, they looked like someone worth getting to know. and who knows, maybe it could develop into something a little more.
but for now, apologies were set and expectations were hammered down. no more judgements were held between the two of them as slowly but surely, they found a safe place in one another.
“hey,” you spoke up after a beat of silence of just soaking up the last of the sunshine before sunset. “you up for another late night stroll tonight?”
“what’s this? a hufflepuff on a rebellious streak?” fred grinned, throwing his arm over the girl he’d eventually come to love. “we’ve barely started hanging out, don’t tell me i’ve already become a bad influence on you?”
you playfully knocked aside the boy you’d surprisingly find yourself growing fond of. “you wish. i was always this badass.”
“i’m so taking you as my date to the ball.” fred laughed, messing up your hair. “whether or not you agree, you’re mine.”
“how very alpha male of you, weasley.” you rolled your eyes and pushed him away, but the small smile on your lips betrayed your actions. was it getting hotter? or was it your face again?
fred watched as you fixed your hair, eyes bright. “call me freddie.”
Tumblr media
1K notes · View notes
jcwriting · 3 years
Text
Written in the Stars
Tumblr media
summary ↬ being soulmates with a werewolf? pretty easy. being jungkook’s soulmate? the easiest thing in the world. there’s only one teensy tiny problem. he doesn’t want to fuck you.
pairing ↬ werewolf!jungkook x reader
genre ↬ soulmate!au, abo verse, fluff, angst, hurt/comfort (this is so fucking dramatic and for what)
word count ↬ 10.4k my hand slipped
warnings ↬ swearing, angst (but with a happy ending bc im a sappy bitch), jk is stupid in love (emphasis on stupid), mentions of violence (very brief and i don’t go into too much detail but just to warn yall), slight nsfw (sex is a big topic for like half of this but not sex is had...i know im shocked too), half of this is background info/setting up the story the other half is finally addressing the summary lolol, jk is kind of an asshole but he has reasons!!!!!
authors note ↬ hello lovelies! here’s a small little thing for you all (laughs in 10k word count). this has been sitting in my drafts for fucking ever and i just needed to get it out there and out of my hands. im thinking about writing a part two where the actual ~*/sex/*~ is had but im still on the fence about that. please let me know what you think! i literally crave your interactions so pls dont be shy,,,,,okay love you bye :)
(ps i was so close to naming this Rewrite the Stars but since this has absolutely nothing to do with The Greatest Showman i didn’t. but i was close,,,,so fucking close)
Tumblr media
You always knew Jeon Jungkook was destined for great things.
It was written in the stars, your mother had told you after he had first stepped foot into your family-owned grocery store. Your mother didn’t have any special powers, she just had a thing for astrology. While you normally shrugged off her random proclamations about divine intervention and planetary alignments, you found that Jungkook was something you couldn’t ignore or chalk up as your mother’s latest tea leaf reading.
From the moment you set eyes on him you knew he was different. While your family held zero claim to any sort of mystical or magical inclinations, you were well aware of those who did. It was no secret that non-humans roamed the Earth in plain sight, even though it had taken humans eons to realize this. After years of savage wars and civil unrest, agreements had come into place and governing bodies were adjusted to accept the changes that had finally been made. But, this was all before your time. You were the generation that was born into the period of peace, the first children to not experience bloodshed before they could walk. The world you knew now was almost a complete one-eighty of what it had been.
Where before those who were not of human blood had to do everything they could to blend in, now could be free of the shadows. Your classrooms had both humans and non-humans in their rosters. Some of your teachers were hybrids. Curriculum expanded to teach humans about a world that had once been entirely unknown to them. One of your favorite teachers was a witch who regaled your tenth grade class with stories of goblin wars, wizard duels, and vampire covens. All tales that you had once thought were nothing but fiction were now anything but.
Which is why, the second Jeon Jungkook entered the grocery store that your parents owned and that you had worked at since you were old enough to speak in full sentences, you knew who he was. You didn’t even question it.
He was a werewolf. A powerful one. You could see it in the way he carried himself. The purposeful strides he took down the narrow aisles, the confidence in his broad shoulders. Humans weren’t nearly as sensitive as their hybrid counterparts but you also paid attention in your classes. Or, perhaps you were more aware than other humans. Never in your life did you have the issues other faced when meeting a non-human for the first time. You always knew who they were without them having to tell you. You just knew.
So, when Jeon Jungkook stepped up to your register with a bottle of water and some raw beef, you didn’t flinch. Didn’t bend under his dark gaze or shuffle your feet in an awkward attempt to break the silence. Instead, you flashed him your customer service smile and rang up his items. He didn’t say a word as he paid, barely sparing you a second glance as he strode out of the store.
“He’s going to be a great and powerful man,” your mother said in that feathery light voice of hers. “It was written in the stars.”
You couldn’t help but agree.
Tumblr media
Jeon Jungkook came into your store everyday for the next month. He bought the same thing every time. A bottle of water and a package of raw beef. The only time he spared you any words was to say thank you or the occasional hello if the sun was shining. Usually, he was alone. Sometimes, he came with a few members of his pack. You liked those days. He smiled a little brighter and talked a little louder when they were around. Especially around Taehyung.
Then, after a month, he didn’t come in. Not for an entire week. From Monday to Sunday, you hadn’t seen a hide nor hair of him. A part of you was worried, so worried that you almost stopped Taehyung in the middle of the street to ask of Jungkook’s whereabouts before realizing how insane that made you look, the other part was chastising yourself for caring. Jeon Jungkook was a customer. Nothing more, nothing less.
The following Monday had come and you had finally stopped glancing at the sliding doors every five minutes. You no longer expected his commanding presence to rock your little world. Instead, you continued your day as if it had been any other. That was, until, Jeon Jungkook stepped through the entrance looking as if he was walking on air. It didn’t take a genius to figure out why.
“Did you have a good heat?” You asked when he stepped up to your register. Jungkook fumbled the water bottle he had been setting onto the conveyer belt before turning to stare at you.
“What did you just say?”
You didn’t shrink under his intense glare. “I was asking if you enjoyed your heat. Seems like you did.”
“How do you know I was in my rut?”
“Oh, is rut the correct terminology? Sorry, they always interchanged them in class, I was never sure what was appropriate.” You shrugged and rang up his items. “It was kind of obvious, though. You seemed pretty agitated about a week-and-a-half ago, then you disappear for a week, and now you’re back looking happier than ever. If it wasn’t your rut then I want to know where you went on vacation because that’s where I’m heading to next.”
Jungkook laughed. That almost made you jump out of your skin. You had never heard him laugh before. It was throaty, it was deep, and it was wonderful. “I’ll be sure to send you the link to the Airbnb.”
“And how do you plan on doing that?”
He smirked. “I’m here every day, aren’t I?”
You tilted your head as you accepted the cash he handed to you. “Clearly, you’re not that reliable.”
Jungkook laughed again. It was becoming your new favorite sound. “My apologies. I didn’t mean to appear flaky.”
“You’re forgiven,” you decided as you handed him the plastic bag of his purchases. Teasingly, you added, “just make sure it doesn’t happen again.”
He flashed you a smile that showed off his sharpened canines. “Don’t worry, darling. I never make the same mistake twice.”
Tumblr media
Jeon Jungkook kept his promise. He showed up everyday, like clockwork. Bought the same thing. Arrived at the same time. The only thing that changed was how he treated you. It wasn’t that he treated you badly before, he had always been polite. But now, he talked to you. He asked you questions and answered yours. More often than not, he laughed.
(It had become your favorite sound.)
For three months, this continued. The two of you had settled into a comfortable routine, something you relied on and expected. Until, he changed that.
Until, Jeon Jungkook asked you out on a date.
“What did you just say?”
“Are you free? Tonight?” You glanced around, almost expecting to see some sort of supermodel posing behind you to explain the absolute absurdity of the situation. “What are you doing?”
“Looking for the hidden cameras. I think I’m getting Punk’d.”
Jungkook sighed and placed both hands on the counter that separated the two of you. “Look at me.” You did. Slowly and warily, but you did. “Does it look like I’m lying to you?”
Narrowing your eyes, you regarded him carefully. He seemed serious. But, then again, do you ever really know someone? “I don’t know. I’ve never actually seen you lie before so I wouldn’t know the difference.”
“Fine. Ask me what color my shirt is.”
“What color is your shirt?”
“White,” he deadpanned. You glanced down at his chest. His shirt was black.
“Jungkook!”
He threw his head back and released a full bellied laugh. Even in your exasperation you couldn’t help but soften a little. “I’m sorry, darling. I couldn’t help myself.” Annoyed, you huffed and spun to face the cash register. Stabbing your finger onto the touchscreen, you ignored Jungkook’s obvious presence on the opposite side of the counter. Until his hand reached around the card reader and grasped a hold of your chin. The warmth of his fingers forced your head to turn to meet his.
“Come to dinner with me.” His voice was nothing but a rumble in his chest, his eyes so black and all-consuming you couldn’t do anything but agree with him. He seemed pleased by your response as his fingers tightened against your skin and a grateful smile flicked past his lips. His gaze darted down to your mouth and your breath froze in your chest.
“Are you going to kiss me?”
Jungkook raised an eyebrow. “Do you want me to?”
“No.” You tried to shake your head but his grip didn’t allow you much movement. He was taken aback by your answer, a small frown tugging at his mouth. You quickly backtracked to fix the situation. “I don’t want our first kiss to be in a grocery store. That’s a new low that I refuse to reach.”
Jungkook chuckled and tapped your chin gently. “Alright, darling. I’ll pick you up at seven.”
Tumblr media
Again, he kept his promise to you. He showed up at your parents house exactly at seven, wearing a button-down shirt and slacks. The tulips he had gotten for you was thrust into your hands the moment you opened the door. Flashing him a genuine smile, you hurried into the kitchen to set them in water while your mother grilled him on his birth time. You were quick to drag him away, practically throwing him towards the car as you waved goodbye.
“Sorry,” you sighed as Jungkook opened the passenger door for you. “She has a…thing for astrology. She’s probably creating your star map or whatever right now.”
“It’s okay,” he responded once he got into the drivers seat. “It’s sweet of her to care.”
You snorted. “She’s delusional is what she is.”
“So, you’re saying you don’t believe in astrology?”
“Do you?”
Jungkook shrugged as he pulled out of your dirt driveway. He looked so damn attractive behind the wheel it was honestly unfair. “Not really saying I do or don’t. All I know is that there are a lot of things out there that are out of our control. If believing in the stars and planets helps you gain some of that control back, I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that.”
“God, don’t talk like that in front of my mother. She’ll want to start dating you.”
He grinned and placed a hand on your knee. “Tell her I’m already taken.”
You didn’t get a chance to respond to that. Not that he didn’t give you one, it was just that you literally had nothing to say. With just one sentence he opened the floodgates of your brain and the amount of thoughts that were flying through your conscious was painful. Anxiety fluttered in your stomach and you pressed your lips together to keep you from word vomiting onto him. No, it was better to keep your mouth shut and let the moment pass.
By the time you reached the restaurant you were a trembling mess of nerves. Were you guys dating? You thought this was just a ‘testing the waters’ date, not a ‘you’re my girlfriend now’ date. Did you have to make it Facebook official? You hated that shit.
Jungkook didn’t comment on your obvious distress, though. He merely placed a hand on the small of your back, ignoring how you jerked in surprise, and led you into the quiet bistro. Nodding politely to the hostess who was practically panting at the sight of him (you honestly couldn’t blame her) and pulled out your chair for you. When he sat down, he started talking. Idle chat at first. Commenting on one of the dishes, asking about the college classes you were taking at your local university. Before you realized it, wine was in your glass and your shoulders were loose. Previous nerves forgotten, you lost yourself in Jungkook. You drank, you ate, you laughed, and genuinely enjoyed his company. Honestly, it was the best date you’d ever been on.
“I have to be honest with you,” Jungkook spoke after he finished his raw steak. “I have an ulterior motive for asking you here tonight.”
“Oh,” you mumbled around the shrimp you had just tossed in your mouth. “So…this isn’t a date?”
“No, it is,” Jungkook clarified quickly around a dry chuckle. He seemed…nervous. It put you on edge immediately. “This is definitely a date. And, also, more.”
“More? What, is this a proposal too?” You were joking. A 100% joking. But Jungkook was staring at you so seriously it made you panic. “Jungkook, if you get down on one knee here I swear-”
“I’m not proposing,” he assured you. “This is something more than that.”
“More?” You parroted. Jungkook sighed.
“Do you know what a true mate is?”
Right there, in that quaint little bistro, on a date with quite possibly the most untouchable man you’d ever met, he explained how you were irrevocably his. His true mate, his soulmate.
Jungkook explained everything in great detail, which you appreciated, because honestly, you had no words. He explained how when he was born, the witch who cared for him told his father that his future glared brightly ahead of him, but only when he met his other half. True mates were rare. Mating was common, the wolves in his pack could have multiple mates or a lifelong one, but true mates were destiny. Someone or something out there had forged the two of you together. You were essentially each others other half. He was made for you and you were made for him.
“But…aren’t true mates only for wolves? I thought it’s impossible for a human to be a true mate,” you asked in a shaky voice once Jungkook took a breath.
“It was supposed to be impossible. Until, I met you.” Jungkook stared at you with a sort of reverence that made your entire body blush. “I have no idea how you are. I’ve spent hours researching. I’ve consulted with members of my pack and others. No one knows why.”
“Are you sure, though? I mean…what if you’re wrong?”
“I’m not.” Jungkook shook his head. “I visited the witch right after I met you. She took one look at me and told me that I had finally found my true mate. She said she’d never seen a future so bright before.”
You had no words for that. For the first time in your life, you were speechless. Jungkook seemed to understand. He let you sit in silence as he paid for the bill and walked you out to the car. The drive back to your parents house was the same. You couldn’t speak. The shock rendered you stupid.
By the time Jungkook pulled into the driveway you still hadn’t spoken a word to each other. You stepped out of the car before he could open the door for you. Walking up to the porch steps in a trance, you didn’t hear him follow you until he clasped your wrist in his hand. Turning to face him, you were surprised to see his brown eyes so big. They practically sparkled in the moonlight and he looked so soft and sweet you nearly melted into the wood beneath your feet.
“Please,” he whispered. “Can you…just - are you okay? You’ve been so quiet. I’m worried I’ve scared you off or something.”
With that voice, it was impossible to deny him. So, you said the first thing that popped in your head. “Do we have to make it Facebook official?”
Jungkook stared at you before bursting into laughter. “Really? That’s all you have to say?”
You blushed and glanced down. “I’m just worried, that’s all. I can’t remember my Facebook password so even if you wanted to change it I don’t think it’ll work.”
“So that’s why you never accepted my friend request,” Jungkook teased. Before you could squeak out a response, he wrapped his arms around your waist and tugged you forward. You kept your arms crossed across your chest but let yourself fall against him.
“Don’t make fun of me,” you whined as you buried your face into his shoulder. He smelled so good, a mixture of pine and spice. “My brain hasn’t worked since you told me I’m yours, so bear with me.”
Jungkook chuckled and gently swayed you from side to side. “Does that mean you’re okay with this? All of this?”
Sighing, you lifted your head up and stepped away from him. Jungkook was not impressed and pulled you back to him. Your heart swelled in your chest and you wrapped your arms around his neck in consolation. “Honestly? I haven’t really processed anything. You’ve had your whole life to come to terms with this. I just found out thirty minutes ago that I’m someone’s soulmate. It’s a lot to take in.”
Jungkook nodded as he tapped his fingers against your hips. “I know. It’s a lot…I’m a lot. I just want you to know that you don’t have to do this. You don’t have to be with me. I won’t-”
Now it was your turn to burst into laughter. You couldn’t believe those words had left his mouth. It was easily the most absurd thing you’d ever heard. “Jungkook, I want to make something very clear. I have no problem being your true mate. That’s not the issue here. Well, there really isn’t an issue. It’s just…hard to believe, I guess. I have to process that this is my new reality.”
“Really?” Jungkook perked up and looked so fucking cute you couldn’t help but cup his cheeks. His skin was so warm despite the cold autumn air that surrounded you both. “You want to do this? Be with me? Be mine?” All you could do was nod. You were so overwhelmed with emotions. The shock was evident, but a piece of you was so happy. You felt whole.
Jungkook’s face split into a wide smile that caused his nose to scrunch up. He wrapped his arms around your waist and spun you around. Squealing, you slung your legs around his hips and held on. Normally, you’d rather die than show this much affection to someone. But, this was Jungkook. Your soulmate.
“So…what do we do now?” You asked once Jungkook set you down. “Is there, like, a ceremony or something?”
“I have no idea,” he admitted as he stared down at you. He had a hand against your jaw and was rubbing your cheek tenderly. “I really didn’t think I’d get this far.”
You scoffed at his ridiculousness. While recognizing you were Jungkook’s true mate was going to take some time, believing that he thought you’d deny him was utter nonsense. “What if…what if we date, first?” You suggested timidly. “I know that sounds kind of weird considering we’re supposed to be the loves of each others lives. But, I don’t really know you all that well. And, I think this is going to take sometime for me to get used to. Maybe we should date, get to know each other, and just learn how to be with one another.”
“Whatever you want,” Jungkook agreed. “We can do whatever you want. Just as long as I have you, I’m happy.”
Tumblr media
Two years passed.
Two blissful, wonderful years. Two years of dating, two years of loving, two years of being Jeon Jungkook’s. It was everything you could’ve asked for and more. You had never felt so loved and cherished in your entire life. He respected you, he took care of you, and most importantly, he was there for you in every sense. Since the moment you met him, you hadn’t been alone. He hadn’t let you. Jungkook knew you better than you knew yourself.
And, it was the same for him. You were there for him when he transitioned into the leader of his pack. You were there when he took over the CEO position from his father and encouraged and supported him every step of the way. You let yourself be loved and in return he let you love him. It was wonderful.
Except, for one tiny thing.
While the emotional aspect of your relationship flourished and bloomed into something beautiful, the physical side remained stagnant. Make out sessions and heavy petting were a norm in your relationship. At first, it didn’t bother you. In fact, you loved that Jungkook was taking things so slow and so seriously. But, eventually, your needs began to grow. You found yourself wanting him in more ways than one, wants that only he could satisfy. Jungkook refused. Every time.
It wasn’t like he refused your every need. No, Jungkook was extremely attentive. When it came to himself, that’s when things got dicy. He had no problem spending hours between your legs, worshipping you until you were crying from the overstimulation. Yet, he wouldn’t let you anywhere near him. Not without lack of trying on your part. The minute your hands went down to his waistband, he pushed you away. Every time you tried to dip your mouth to the obvious bulge in his pants, he lifted you up and kissed you breathless until you forgot your name. It wasn’t until after a year of dating that he finally let you grind on his clothed cock. Even then, he held off until you finished and then walked out with quite possibly the worst case of blue balls. You hated that he did this to himself. The worst part was, you couldn’t understand why.
The one time you had brought it up to him it had resulted in the worst fight the two of you had ever gotten into. It was the only argument that was never really resolved. After the yelling and the tears, all you got out of Jungkook was that mating with a wolf was not pretty. It was extremely dangerous and he refused to put you in that kind of danger. End of discussion. No matter how hard you tried to persuade him or broach the subject, he shut it down. Hard. Eventually, you gave up.
He even spent his ruts away from you. Every three months, he left you for a week. You knew he had a place somewhere up in the mountains and you assumed that’s where he went. You had no idea. There was no point even asking to come along. You loved your boyfriend and didn’t want to purposely give him a heart attack. You hated it when he left. As much as you tried to hide it and convince him that you were just fine, he wasn’t stupid. Being away from him was tough. A piece of you was missing whenever he was gone. And you were only whole again when he returned.
This past week had been one of those weeks. He had left on Sunday for the mountains. He was agitated and clingy, how he normally was pre-rut. Jungkook wouldn’t let you leave his side and you spent most of the weekend on his lap or wrapped in his arms. Not that you minded. When he left your parents house on Sunday night, you’d had to coax him out of the door. Promising him that you’d be okay and that you’d see him next week. It wasn’t until several kisses later did Jungkook finally leave.
While you’d been doing this for two years, it never got easier. More manageable? Sure. But definitely not easier. All you could do was go through the motions. You went to work at the local bakery, came home and helped your mom with dinner, watched TV with your dad before going to bed. Taehyung and Jimin would visit often, threatened by Jungkook to keep you company. While you assured them it wasn’t necessary, you secretly didn’t mind. They made you laugh and made you temporarily forget your boyfriend was miles away from you. Sometimes, if you were lucky, he’d call you to tell you goodnight. But those times were rare. Normally, you didn’t hear from him until Friday or Saturday when he was finally coming out of his rut and returning to the world.
By the time Sunday rolled around, you were a jittery ball of nerves. Not in a bad sense. You were just excited. The anticipation killed you and it took all of your willpower to sit and wait for his text to tell you to come over. Your parents always left you alone on these Sundays, unable to deal with your hyperactiveness and constant fidgeting.
This Sunday was no different. You puttered around your room for the better part of the day. You spent the other part in the kitchen, baking like your life depended on it. Jungkook loved your cookies and you always made sure to come over with at least three batches after his ruts. He always said that was his second favorite part about coming home, after seeing you, of course.
You had just finished packaging the final batch in a glass cookie jar when your phone dinged. You didn’t have to read the message, you knew exactly what it said. Pure joy rushed through your system as you threw on your coat and shouted a hasty goodbye to your parents. Juggling the cookies and car keys, you sprinted to your car. The drive to Jungkook’s was thankfully not long. About ten minutes, as long as you didn’t hit any traffic on the main road. Luck was on your side, though, and you showed up at Jungkook’s house in eight minutes.
Taehyung’s car was in the driveway when you pulled up, which wasn’t odd. Although Jungkook owned the house, the members of his pack were almost always around. While most preferred to travel in their wolf forms, you knew Taehyung and Namjoon preferred cars. Something about being able to listen to their own music without comments from the peanut gallery. You didn’t really understand and didn’t really need to. You had just chalked it up as one of their many quirks.
Carrying the trays of cookies in both hands, you shut your car door with your foot before speed-walking up the stone walkway to Jungkook’s home. The screen door was shut, but the wooden door was swung wide open. You had just reached for the metal handle when you heard it.
A deep, threatening growl ripped through the peaceful quiet and froze you in place. You knew it was Jungkook. While you had only heard it once, you’d never forgotten it. It was when the two of you had attended a party and an alpha from a neighboring pack had cornered you in the hallway. Jungkook had found you cowered against the wall as the other alpha had caged you in. The sound that had left his chest had given you equal parts comfort and fear. Comfort, because he was there and you knew you were safe. Fear, because you could see in the way he bared his teeth and how his muscles vibrated, he had been furious and bloodthirsty.
That’s what you felt now, fear.
Something was wrong. Something was very, very wrong.
From your vantage point in front of the screen door, you could see directly into the kitchen. Taehyung was leaning against the granite countertop and Jungkook was seated at the island. The tension was so thick you practically choked on it.
“Enough, Taehyung.”
“No,” Taehyung snapped, seeming just as angry as Jungkook. “I’m not dropping it. Not this time.”
“Yes, you will,” Jungkook snarled. “I’m not having this conversation with you.”
“Too fucking bad.” While Taehyung was also an alpha, he acted so much like a beta you never really noticed. Until now. “I’m not going to sit by and watch you do this to yourself anymore. Not spending your ruts correctly is only causing you more harm than good.”
“I’m doing things the way I want to, and it’s working-”
“The hell it is!” Jungkook growled at the interruption but Taehyung ignored him. “It’s not working, and you know it. Anyone with two fucking eyes knows it. It’s getting so bad that the pack is noticing, too. Even Namjoon has realized something is wrong, and he’s as oblivious as they come.”
“If they have a problem with me they can take it up with me.”
“No, they can’t. Because you won’t listen. Your head is so far up your ass you can’t even hear yourself anymore. What you’re doing right now is not working. Something needs to change.”
“Like what?” Jungkook spat.
“You know what,” Taehyung bit back. Jungkook was practically vibrating from rage. You knew you needed to go get someone, someone from the pack to calm the two of them down. Things were only escalating, but you couldn’t move. Your brain screamed at you to run but your legs were rooted in place. “That’s is what’s so frustrating, Jungkook. This, all of this, could be solved. She’s right there-”
“Don’t.” Jungkook stood up so fast the chair he sat on flew backwards and hit the wall with a resounding crack.
“Why?” Taehyung threw his arms up in the air. “Why not? I don’t get it-”
“Because I don’t want her!” Jungkook yelled, the force of it rang throughout the house. You had no idea who the she was that they were referring to. You assumed it was someone from the pack. It was well-known that wolves with human mates sometimes turned to other she-wolves to help with their ruts. You figured that’s what Jungkook did whenever he went away for a week. It had bothered you at first, but you knew he had his needs and that they were at a biological level. You refused to make him feel guilty or ashamed for taking care of himself.
“You don’t want her?” Taehyung was enraged. You could tell by the way he straightened his spine and unfurled himself to his full height. Jungkook bristled in response and the muscles in his back strained against the thin material of his shirt.
“No, I don’t!” Jungkook exploded. “What don’t you understand about that? I don’t want her around me. I don’t need her, I’m fine on my own. The thought of having her there when…God - it makes me physically ill.”
“She’s your girlfriend. Above all of that, your true mate. You’re seriously going to deny yourself of her, for what? Just because you don’t like having her around?”
Oh.
That’s when it hit you. They weren’t talking about some random she-wolf. They were talking about you. You were the one Jungkook didn’t want. You were the one Jungkook didn’t need. You were the one he didn’t like having around. As the weight of the words sunk into your mind, you felt your chest becoming tighter and tighter.
Then, you’re heart broke right in half. You dropped the container of cookies and didn’t flinch when it shattered against the wooden slats. The sound unstuck your feet from their position on the porch and your fight or flight system took over. Without a second thought, you turned on your heel and ran.
You didn’t know if anyone was behind you, you didn’t turn around to check. Hands fumbled for the car door as you threw yourself into the drivers side. Pain ricocheted throughout your chest cavity and you struggled to breathe. Your brain was blank, the only thing your mind did was move your body to get you somewhere safe. You had to leave and you had to leave now.
Miraculously, your fingers found your keys and inserted them into the ignition on the second try. A flutter of movement occurred to the left of you but your eyes didn’t let you look that way. Instead, they focused on the rearview mirror as you reversed out of the driveway. Your right hand found the gearshift and moved it to drive. Soon, you were tearing down the street as your ears refused to register the agonized howls that echoed behind as you kept staring forward. Adrenaline pumped through your system and your body shivered in response, the splash of hormones had created a blanket of fake calm over you. The emotions, the pain, the thoughts were swirling inside of you, ready to break free and drown you, but your brain wouldn’t allow it.
It wasn’t until you reached the end of your long driveway that you felt the original spike of adrenaline fade away. Your mother was in the front, tending to the flowers, and looked up when she saw your car fly into its usual spot. She stood up and her face twisted into a frown when you got out of your seat.
“Honey, your aura…it’s concerning.” The blanket was yanked away and the pain crashed over you.
You couldn’t say a word, all you could do was collapse in your mother's arms and cry, cry, cry.
Tumblr media
It took you two days to calm down. The tears had stopped rolling and your shoulders no longer shook from trying to hold your sobs behind your teeth. Your mother hadn’t left your side, leaving your father to answer the door whenever someone knocked. The only person who did was Taehyung and Jimin. Jungkook never showed up.
Well, that was a lie.
Jungkook did show up every morning and night, without fail. But he never came to your doorstep.  Instead, he was in the woods behind your house, patrolling, not daring to leave the protection of the forest. A part of you wondered if he was respecting your obvious need for space or if your mother had paid a witch to set up boundary lines that didn’t allow him to cross. Either way, you were grateful that you couldn’t see him. There was an incessant tugging in your heart to be near him but you staunchly ignored it, which would’ve been impossible if you saw his achingly beautiful face.
I don’t want her. I don’t need her. Having her there makes me physically ill. Those three sentences played in a constant loop in your head, like a horror movie you couldn’t escape from. You were the protagonist who couldn’t escape the maze, but the villain wasn’t kind enough to kill you off. No matter what you did, your brain wouldn’t stop repeating those three sentences. Your mother burned sage, she pressed crystals into your palms, she muttered ritual after ritual, but nothing worked.
You hated how affected you were. You had always told yourself that you would never be the girl who’d get so wrapped up in someone else they didn’t know who they were anymore. Independence was something you prided yourself on, but you seemed to be at a complete loss now. You couldn’t stop the waves of sadness and self-hatred at your depressed state. It was amazing how empty you felt yet so full of pain at the same time. Your mind and heart couldn’t seem to decide which hurt worse; your heart for having your soulmate so obviously reject you, or your brain for trying to make sense of the situation. When did this happen? How did this happen? How had you been so blind as to not see it?
“I don’t think we’re soulmates,” you rasped to your mom on the third morning. It had been the first words you had spoken to her since you had fell into her arms. She looked up from the bundle of herbs she was smoking.
“Why do you say that?”
You stared at your hands that had curled in on themselves. “I don’t make him happy. I-I never realized how uncomfortable I made him. I wish I had known. How did I miss it?”
Your mother tutted gently and gathered you in her arms. She smelled of lavender and wax. “This is good. I’m glad you’re letting yourself have this moment. Let’s sit in this and allow yourself to be embedded here.” But you didn’t want to have this moment. You didn’t want to have any moment and you’ve felt enough to last a lifetime. Instead, you rolled over, let sleep overtake you and tried to ignore the distant howling that rattled your window pane.
By nightfall of the fourth day, you were forced out of bed. Partly by choice, partly by force. Your parents had dipped out to run to the grocery store, despite your mother’s insistence that she could stay. You and your father managed to convince her to leave and you had gotten up to wave them goodbye. Sure, your heart was broken, but the least you could do was kiss them on the cheek before they left. You had turned around to shuffle into the kitchen to try and shovel something down your dry throat when a loud knock sounded at the front door. Hesitating, you carefully peeked through the kitchen window and saw Jimin on your front doorstep, dressed in all black.
Sighing, you stumbled over and pulled the door open. You figured you couldn’t avoid them for much longer. “Hey, Jimin.”
“Christ, you look like shit.”
You huffed out a laugh as Jimin stared at you in horror, not having the energy to be offended. You also knew, in a weird way, that this was Jimin’s way of caring for you. “Yeah. My mother’s covered all the mirrors in the house.”
Jimin nodded as he glanced at you from head to toe. “I want to ask if you’re okay but…” He gestured to your gaunt frame swaddled in a heavy sweatshirt and sweatpants. For the first time in two years, they were your own clothes, not Jungkook’s.
“I’m fine, Jimin,” you heaved a heavy sigh and leaned against the doorframe. “Do you want to come in? I think my mom boiled some tea not too long ago.”
Jimin shook his head. “Can’t. Jungkook would have a fit if I got that close to you right now. I’m already pushing my luck just by showing up.” He doesn’t care, you thought bitterly, and almost said it out loud but you caught yourself at the last second. Jimin wasn’t stupid, though. He knew what you were thinking. “Hey,” he murmured, eyes going soft, “are you ready to talk about it?”
“No.” You shook your head. A wave of sadness washed over you but the telltale prick of tears didn’t come.
Jimin understood. He tucked his hands into his pockets as he rocked back onto his heels. “Are you going to talk to him?”
Letting out a heavy breath, you crossed your arms over your chest. “I know I have to. I just…I just need time.”
“Take however long you need.”
Tumblr media
It was another 48-hours before you finally snapped. While you had spent the majority of the two days that had passed to make yourself resemble a human being, you couldn’t focus. You couldn’t move on. Why?
Because Jungkook wouldn’t leave you alone.
His presence was constant. He circled your house every hour of ever day, the large shadow of him in wolf form darkened the trees behind your house. The howling had stopped but the pacing hadn’t. You hoped he was at least sleeping, but then you got annoyed at yourself for caring. You didn’t know why he was out there, it made no sense. Jungkook’s words were so different from his actions it made your head spin.
But, you needed to move on with your life. You had to. The only way it was going to happen was if Jungkook did too. It hurt. God, did it hurt. Yet, as sad and utterly pathetic as it sounded, you were used to the pain at this point, had resigned yourself to it. A part of you worried you wouldn’t know what to do without it.
Shaking off that depressing thought, you tugged on your rain boots and stepped outside for the first time in a week. The air was heavy with the promise of rain, the clouds low and gray. You tugged the hood up on your sweater to prevent your hair from completely frizzing out before you walked to down the back deck steps.
The backyard of your parents house was expansive. The home you had grown up in sat on top of a sloping hill that your mother had turned into her personal greenhouse. You stepped past rows of raised garden beds and pruned plants until you reached the line where the neatly mowed grass met the twisted ferns of the forest floor. As you had suspected, the ground was scorched with the evidence of past rituals. While your mother hadn’t out right admitted, you had figured someone had come and created a boundary line. It was obviously specific to Jungkook since Jimin and Taehyung were still able to visit. While your mother’s methods were extreme, you understood. As difficult as it was to move on with your life with Jungkook sequestered to the forest, you couldn’t imagine what it would’ve been like if he was within a few feet of you.
With a deep inhale, you sat down on the damp grass and waited. After a few minutes, you could hear the faint sounds of paws hitting the wet earth. The galloping got louder and louder until there was a momentary stretch of silence before it changed to footsteps.
When Jungkook emerged from the trees, you weren’t prepared. Although you knew you wouldn’t be, you still weren’t expecting it to hurt this bad. Your chest squeezed painfully at the first look of his broad form. Technically, it had been two weeks since you two had truly seen each other, the longest you’d ever gone. What hurt the most was how badly you longed for him. You wanted nothing more than to run straight into his arms, bury your face into his chest, and forget everything. Just forgive and give your heart what it wanted. But you remained firmly in place.
Jungkook looked as if he had seen a ghost. Which, to be fair, was probably true since you hadn’t seen the sun in seven days. His normally golden skin was pale and even from where you sat you could see the dark circles bruising under his eyes. Clearly, he hadn’t been sleeping. You hated that you noticed. You hated that you cared. He was dressed in all black and his chest strained against the material of his sweater. His hands were balled into tight fists at his side and the sight reminded you of why you were here.
“Hi.” Probably wasn’t the best start but it was the best you could do. Jungkook didn’t respond so you soldiered on. “I-I know you don’t want to be here, so I’ll make this quick. I just…wanted to apologize. I had no idea I made you so uncomfortable. I’m not sure how long you’ve felt this way about me, not that it really matters, but I wish you had told me sooner. Maybe things would’ve been easier for you, who knows.” You released a heavy sigh and tried to shove down the stone in your throat as you forced the next words out of your mouth. “But, all of that doesn’t matter anymore. I think I understand what you need, now. I know you loved me at one point, but I’m obviously not what you need anymore. And…t-that’s okay - I swear it is. All I want is for you to be happy, Jungkook. And I think, in order for that to happen, I need to move on. We both need to move on-”
“Stop it,” Jungkook broke in with a harsh voice that cut your sentence in half. “Stop talking.”
It felt like he had slapped you in the face. A wave of humiliation washed over you and you visibly flinched. Staggering to your feet, you locked your gaze onto your boots in an attempt to hide the tears that dripped down your nose. “I’m sorry,” you whispered, not expecting it to change anything. You began to turn away but Jungkook stopped you in your tracks, again.
“Wait, no - stop. Stop. Please…don’t go,” he pleaded. When you turned around, his eyes were frantic. Jungkook’s hand was raised from his side as if he thought about reaching out to you but something stopped him. His words were at war with one another and you were caught in the middle, at a loss for what he was trying so desperately to convey to you.
“Jungkook, I’m so confused.”
“I know. I’m sorry. God, I’m sorry.” Jungkook tucked his head into his hands before dropping down into a squat. “This is all wrong. This is all so wrong.”
You knew you should walk away. You had said your piece, it was time to move on, just as you had said. Yet, you couldn’t. It was as if your heart was tethered to him and your body couldn’t handle the pain of walking away. “Listen-”
“I don’t know what to do.” He cut you off but the bubbles of anger that had risen from being interrupted popped once you saw how lost he looked. His tattooed fingers threaded through his hair, allowing you to see the pure anguish that twisted his features. “Whenever I feel like this, I come to you. Because you always know what to do. Any situation, no matter what, you can handle it. It’s something I’ve always admired about you.”
The way he spoke to you now, so reverently and so full of awe, made your head spin. Nothing made sense.  It was such a blatant contrast to the brutality that he had spat out a week ago. As much as you wanted to believe what he said now, those stupid words could not get out of your head. It was a constant reminder that never shut up.
“I don’t know what to do either,” you admitted in a quiet voice.
“Tell me,” Jungkook begged, as if he couldn’t and refused to comprehend what you had just told him. “Tell me what to do, and I’ll do it. Whatever you want from me, I’ll give you.”
You were shaking your head before he could finish. “There’s nothing you can do, Jungkook. Nothing.”
“Don’t say that.” He stared at you, horrified. “Don’t say that to me. Please, there has to be something.”
“What could there be?” You cried. Tears streamed down your cheeks now. “You said it yourself, being near me makes you sick. Why would I stay? Why would you want me to? I refuse to make you uncomfortable anymore - so that’s that.”
“It isn’t,” Jungkook argued back. “It can’t be. I-I can’t lose you, I can’t. I need to make this right, please just let me. Please.”
But, you were tired. You were so fucking tired. You were exhausted of the emotional rollercoaster that you were on that you just wanted to crawl away and hide. All the fight seeped out of you as your shoulders slumped forward. Jungkook saw this and the blood drained from his face. You were giving up, he could see it, and it scared the shit out of him.
“Jungkook, I need to go, okay? I-I can’t do this.”
“No!” Jungkook shouted and shot up to his feet. The pure panic that choked his voice brought on a fresh set of tears that you struggled to hold back. “Just let me explain, okay? I swear to God, after you hear what I have to say, if you still want me to, I’ll let you go. I won’t fight you on it. But, please let me tell you the truth. Give me a chance to make this right. You deserve that.”
You hesitated for a moment. Deep down, you knew you should let him talk. Not because you necessarily thought he deserved to, but because he was right. You did deserve the truth, no matter how much it broke your heart. With a heavy sigh and a quick swipe of your cheeks, you nodded. Once Jungkook was sure you weren’t going to leave, he began pacing. Looking every bit like the wild animal you knew him to be but never got to see.
“Mating with a werewolf is…brutal. It’s intense, it’s painful and it isn’t pretty. It’s essentially a breeding session where I use you as a vessel to fulfill my innate biological needs. It’s not romantic, it’s not gentle. Even for she-wolves it can be too much. The thought of subjecting you to something like that - that type of pain…I couldn’t fathom it. I don’t think you understand just how precious you are to me. The image of you being battered and bruised because of me, something I did…it tormented me, day and night.” He paused for a moment, the pained look in his eyes made you shiver. You hated that he had gone through all of this turmoil on his own, and you especially hated how you never made more of an effort to try and relieve him of it.
“I couldn’t do it. That’s partially the reason I waited so long to tell you that you were my true mate. I knew ruts were something I would never expose you to even though it’s such a huge part of my life, a wolf’s life.” Jungkook looked you straight in the eye, the intensity of his dark gaze took your breath away. “I know the practices other wolves partake in when their own heats or ruts arrive. I know you know them too. But, I need you to understand something. The moment you allowed me to be yours and vice versa, I haven’t had anyone else since. I swear on my life, I’ve spent every single one of my ruts alone. I wouldn’t and I won’t do that to you.”
“Isn’t that painful, though?” Your voice cracked but neither one of you acknowledged it. While your knowledge on ruts were expansive, having done plenty of research since being with Jungkook, you had obviously never experienced one.
“It’s manageable. It’s way more painful for a she-wolf to go through her heat alone than it is for a male.” Jungkook clenched and unclenched his fists as he resumed his pacing. “The worst part is being away from you. I’ve been going through ruts since puberty, I can handle them. But not being able to be with you for a whole week…I hated it. Still do. I dread that three month mark. And as time went on, I became more and more miserable. Being apart from you was almost unbearable but the other option…I never even allowed myself to consider it.
“It came to the point where the pack was noticing. I wasn’t getting the proper pheromonal release from my ruts and it was beginning to affect those around me. Taehyung has been on my ass for months now to get over myself and take you with me during my next rut. Each time I’d give him some excuse, but it was getting harder and harder to justify what I was doing. At first, I was convinced it was because I was protecting you. But you’ve been so understanding and so patient with me and my life, those excuses were becoming useless. Eventually, I think it was because I was protecting myself. I was - am - so scared. I’m terrified that I could hurt you when I’m like that. That I wouldn’t be able to notice or worse, ignored, if something happened to you. Living with that type of fear became debilitating. So, I just kept my mouth shut and kept you away from that part of me.”
Jungkook shook his head and chuckled humorlessly. “Now I know that was the worst possible thing I could do. That I was just hurting you more. What you walked into last Sunday was a culmination of my frustrations that I was refusing to deal with. While it’s not a valid reason, I’m well aware of that, I need you to know that what you heard was not the truth. It couldn’t be further from it. Because the truth is that I’m hopelessly in love with you and the thought of being without you hurts worse than I ever thought was possible.”
It wasn’t the first nor would it be the last time that Jungkook left you speechless. It took you a full minute to process what he had said. Jungkook granted you the silence although he became increasingly more agitated as time passed. His boots scuffed the dead leaves that littered the ground and his pacing led him closer to the ashes that lay before your feet. Then, he’d suddenly stalk off with a growl as he was forced to keep away.
“I-” you cleared your throat around the lump that had found a home there. “I had no idea. This whole time…I thought it was because you didn’t want me.”
“God, no.” Jungkook swore heavily as his muscles bunched and coiled beneath his clothes. “The - the fact that…you - fuck. I’m so sorry. I’m so fucking sorry. That’s not it, that’s not it at all. You’re my dream girl, you’re the love of my life, and I want you every second of every day.”
Maybe it’s because you were emotionally drained and had no mental strength left. Maybe, you needed to hear those words from Jungkook more than you realized. Whatever the reason was, it wasn’t worth trying to figure out an explanation as you sunk to the ground and burst into tears.
Jungkook lost it across from you. Broken whines stained the air as he carded through his hair anxiously. He kept trying to get to you, to try to soothe you. But the boundary was unfortunately doing its job and each attempt was met with failure. Curses were spat out until eventually, he got as close as the boundary would let him and fell to his knees. He began spewing whatever came to mind first, unsure of what to do. All he knew was that you were crying because of him and there was absolutely nothing he could do about it. He thought hearing you cry from your bedroom window was torture, but nothing could compare to hearing you break down in front of him. Nothing. “Fuck, fuck, fuck. I’m sorry…please, I’m so sorry. I - don’t cry, darling. Please don’t. I’m so sorry I hurt you, I didn’t mean to, I swear.”
It wasn’t tears of heartbreak that leaked from your eyes. Instead, it was tears of relief. While your heart had wholly accepted his words as the truth, the logical part of you reminded yourself that the two of you had way more talking to do. This was far from over, but the relief of knowing that he loved you and he was yours…it was indescribable.
You finally lifted your head up and were shocked to find Jungkook’s cheeks glistening with moisture. Your only thought was to comfort him as you scrambled forward to do just that. Instead of feeling his smooth skin against the palm of your hand, you were blocked by what felt like a wall although nothing stood in your way. Frowning, you realized with a start that the boundary worked both ways. Jungkook let out a frustrated growl as he glared at the ashes that was stopping both of you from getting what you wanted. It was silent for a few moments until an idea popped into your head.
“Wait here,” you announced before jumping up and taking off for the house. Ignoring Jungkook’s distressed cry, you ran inside. You yanked your car keys off from their designated hook and quickly typed out a text to your parents to let them know where you were going before spinning around and sprinting back outside. Jungkook was where you left him, although he stumbled to his feet when he saw you reappear.
“I’m going to your house,” you announced, breathless. “No witch is stupid enough to go that far into werewolf territory. If you want to talk to me there, then follow me.”
Jungkook stared at you for a heartbeat until the words you spoke clicked. “Y-yeah. Yes. Okay. I’ll be there.”
With a curt nod, you ran to your car. For the first time in a week, a faint sprout of hope bloomed in your chest.
Tumblr media
It was the longest and shortest ten minutes of your life. The drive to Jungkook’s seemed to last a lifetime but also was over within a blink of an eye. The tears had stopped flowing by the time you pulled your car into his driveway, but you felt the telltale prick in your eyes when you saw him burst from the trees. Your heart ached as his long legs ate up the distance between you two as you wrestled with your seatbelt and threw the car into park. By the time you freed yourself, he was at the hood of your car.
The two of you stared at each other for a few breathless moments. You weren’t sure who moved first, but it didn’t matter as you crashed into each other’s arms. The moment his searing warmth enveloped you, you dissolved into another puddle of sobs. The feeling of his thick arms banded across your back, his torso molded to yours, and his hair tickling your ear, felt so right. Another wave of crippling relief washed over you and you practically melted against Jungkook. But he held you up, just like he always had.
He leaned against the front bumper while his hands were everywhere. Cradling your head into his neck, smoothing over your hips, or running circles over your shoulders. He was crying, you could feel the tears dampening your hair. But you were soaking his shirt so no one was in any position to complain.
“I’m sorry,” you whispered.
“Don’t,” Jungkook hissed fiercely as he squeezed you tighter. “Don’t apologize. This isn’t your fault, not in the slightest.”
“Kook,” you sighed and pulled your head back to get a good look at him. “It takes two to tango.”
“Not this time,” he argued. “You’ve put up with so much. You’re everything I could’ve asked for and more. It was my own fears that got in the way and created this mess. And I’m so sorry for that, darling. I’m so fucking sorry.”
You shushed him gently, running your thumbs over his cheeks to swipe at the dried tears. “I know you’re sorry. I believe you.”
Jungkook dipped his head further into your touch with a pleased rumble vibrating through his chest. He kissed your palm gently, sniffing at your wrist. It made you giggle. “Missed that,” Jungkook mumbled as he stared at you with stars in his eyes. “Missed you. Missed you so much.”
A fresh wave of tears cascaded down your cheeks. You were positive that you looked like a mess, hair in a knotted bun, face red and puffy and you kept sniffling every two seconds. But Jungkook looked at you as if you held the world in your hands. “Missed you too,” you murmured in return. “Please, next time, just talk to me. I may not have the answers you’re looking for all the time, but I’ll always be here to listen.”
“I know,” Jungkook whispered. “There won’t be a next time, promise. If I happen to be stupid enough to put us in this position again, I give you full permission to punch me in the face.”
“I’ll keep that in mind.” You lifted yourself onto your toes to brush your lips against his, dropping back down to your feet when his head chased after yours. “Or maybe I just won’t kiss you for a week.”
Jungkook’s eyes widened comically and he actually looked terrified. “I’d rather you just punched me in the face.” You tilted your head back and laughed. Jungkook tugged you closer and nosed your throat before peppering gentle kisses along the exposed skin. Sighing happily, you tilted your head to allow him better access and rested your cheek on his shoulder.
“I love you,” you said quietly. Jungkook froze for a split second before he sank against you. Squeaking in shock, you scrambled to brace yourself against the sudden weight pressing you towards the house.
“Say it again,” Jungkook pleaded. You couldn’t deny him. Dusting feather light kisses to the shell of his ear, you repeated those three words again, and again, and again. Each time you did, Jungkook held you a little tighter and cried a little harder.
Eventually, you’re murmured promises became softer and softer until the two of you just enjoyed each others presence. “C’mon,” you finally whispered as you started to lift yourself off of him. Jungkook growled and refused to let you move an inch farther. “Kook, come on. Let’s go inside. Your ass must be numb by now.”
“Don’t care,” he grumbled but he at least shuffled forward a bit more so that your combined weight wasn’t squashing his ass against your car.
“You might say that now, but you won’t be saying that later.”
Jungkook grunted at your logic but he at least raised his head and looked at you with the sweetest eyes. “Please tell me you’re staying.”
Giggling, you asked, “do you want me to?”
“Obviously,” he scoffed. “I want you here forever.” Jungkook tilted his head thoughtfully. “Actually, you should just move in with me.”
Christ, this boy was going to give you whiplash. You couldn’t help but laugh. “Jungkook, we just made up. The whole reason we were in this mess is because of poor communication. Don’t you think we should work on that first before anything else?”
“But…we could work on communication all the time if we’re together 24/7.” Despite his pout, you knew he wasn’t totally serious. Although you were sure it was going to come up again.
“Alright, you maniac,” you said fondly. “Take me to bed.” Jungkook’s chest rumbled happily as he lifted you up and wrapped your legs around his trim waist.
It wasn’t a long walk to his bedroom, but the exhaustion of the past week caught up to you and the gentle rocking of his steps lulled you into a serene state. Not quite asleep, but not quite awake either. You were aware when Jungkook placed you on his bed, practically engulfed in his scent. The last thing you remember before falling asleep was the words Jungkook pressed into your hair has he slid in behind you.
“Love you forever, my darling girl.”
Tumblr media
©jcwritings Do not repost, translate, or use my stories without my permission.
LINKS:
masterlist
ao3
TAGLIST:
yzkyzkuniverse
2K notes · View notes
another-stark-sub · 2 years
Text
“Are you in love with him?” - Tony Stark Imagine
Notes: I wrote and editted this in two hours instead of going over my notes. Was gonna be spicy fluffy but it just turned into fluffy, and one of the lines/paragraphs (smth like that i dont remember how long that segment was) is based on/inspired by a fanfic on ao3 I bookmarked. I think it’s debt-free, but I could be wrong.  Anyway, I hope you enjoy, and I’m so sorry im not on here more oftennnnn
- - -
“Of course I am. He’s Tony Stark.” You sighed, a weight finally lifted off your chest. “Who isn’t in love with him?”
Bruce blinked a few times, the confusion evident on his face. “Then, why don’t you tell him?”
You scoffed. These geniuses think they know everything, but they couldn’t see what was glaringly obvious to you. “He’s Tony Stark.”
The perplexed expression didn’t disappear from your friend’s expression. So, you explained further, “It’s already a privilege, beyond that really, to be talking to you, to any Avenger. To work with any of you is an honor, and to be friends with you” -you laughed- “it shouldn’t even be possible for someone like me.”
“Don’t say that. You’re amazing, too.” 
You tried to find any tick, any clue that he was lying. But Bruce seemed to really believe this. “I know I’m amazing.” You shrugged. “I’m great. I love and I care deeply, and I have a stable job. I have a place for myself, and I take care of myself.” You clicked your tongue. “However, you all, all  you Avengers… Forget out of my league, more like off planet.
“And Tony? He said it himself. Genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist. Add superhero, figurehead, public figure, ex-CEO, and savior of the universe. Bruce, I have confidence in myself, but Tony is something else entirely. No one is worthy of him or his affections unless they’re a god or another Avenger.”
It was hard to keep up with the statistical analysis you were trying to run. The literal one on your hologram and the one keeping your view of Tony in check. So, defeated, you sighed and leaned back in your chair. 
Bruce closed his own work and stood across the lab bench. “Weirdly enough, I’m sure none of us Avengers think that way.” After a few taps of his pen against his palm, he added, “Aren’t there fans making posts about you, too? Tony showed me the, uh, Instagram videos.”
You laughed. “Fan edits don’t make an Avenger. Saving the world does.”
He shrugged. “You help us save the world.”
“From inside Avengers Tower on a computer.” You took a deep breath. “Look, Bruce, I appreciate what you’re trying to do. But, I’m not telling him.” You shrugged and brought your statistical analysis back up.
You knew your own worth. You were worthy of an amazing partner and person. Tony Stark, though, was easy beyond that. You had accepted it soon after you realized your own feelings, and while they haven’t dwindled, you knew it was for the best. 
~ - ~
Tony had never resorted to this before. It was never a question of his ability to code. In the past, it was because he didn’t need a program or an AI to do it for him. He could always tell if someone was into him. He knew when Pepper was into him. The moment Rhodey gazed at him back in their MIT days. Every single reporter and heiress and model he slept with, he knew when their thoughts turned sexual or romantic. 
You, though. With you, he couldn’t fucking tell, and he knew it was because of his own feelings. Tony felt intensely for people before. Pepper, Rhodey, that one reporter all those years ago. However, with you, it wasn’t just that fluttery feeling in his gut or the immediate smile he can’t seem to stop when he sees you. It was the comfort he felt when he heard your voice or the softness he could feel in his heart when he saw a picture of you. 
It was like his entire life was full of panic, never resting, never stopping. But when you entered his life with a gentle smile and a quick wit, it felt like he could finally breathe. 
It was addicting. 
“Sir, I have the calculations.”
“Hit me.”
“Speech diagnostics of you and of Ms. (Y/l/n) are similar. Whenever you speak of her, 79.4% is positive and 18.8% is neutral. Ms. (Y/l/n) has  78.9% positive and 17.2% neutral dialogue regarding you. When she speaks of you, her heartrate increases by 4.6%, and similarly, yours increases by 4.1%. When speaking to each other, heartrate initially increases by 7%.”
Tony nodded. “How does this compare to other Avengers? I gush about Banner like a teenager.”
“Well, sir, while you and Ms. (Y/l/n) have high positive dialogue about other Avengers, all of them have at least a 10% decrease compared to each other. And heartrate varies depending on the topic of conversation.”
Tony snapped his fingers. “Am I excluding all non-super friends? Include any agents, co-workers. Pep isn’t an Avenger after all.”
Friday took two seconds and responded. “You and Ms. (Y/l/n) have a significant difference in speech diagnostics when talking about or to each other compared to any other Avenger, co-worker, and friend.”
When Tony remained quiet, Friday added, “Do you want me to repeat the results?”
“You don’t need to, Friday.”
“But you’re not doing anything with the new information. Would you like me to save these findings?”
“Friday,” Tony warned. 
There was silence as the love-wrecked scientist pressed his fist between his brows. Data and cold hard facts said yes, but was it right?
“Sir?”
“Yes, Fri?”
“Would you like me to play examples for you?”
He blinked. “Examples?”
“Yes. Of you and her talking about each other positively.”
It was an invasion of privacy. Tony shouldn’t. 
“Play examples.”
Before his rational mind could tell Friday no. 
“Are you in love with him?”
Tony’s eyes widened. This was too private. It might not even be about him.”Friday-”
“Of course I am.”
“-stop playback.”
“He’s Tony Sta-”
“Playback stopped.”
Tony scrambled. “What? No, wait, go back. Play it.” Screw rational. You knew he was a narcissist. You wouldn’t expect him to hear that and stop. 
“He’s Tony Stark. Who isn’t in love with him?”
“Then, why don’t you tell him?”
“... He’s Tony Stark.”
Tony started to fiddle with something on his desk. “What does that mean?”
Friday answered, “Dr. Banner asked her if she loved you, and she said yes. This means that she’s in love with you.”
Why did he program Friday like this? “I know that. I mean, those two lines. Why does me being Tony Stark stop her from saying something?” Was it the attention? Did you want some sort of normal life away from cameras and international gossip? Maybe it was the Avenging. Having a partner who was always out risking death wasn’t ideal. 
Sure, you could be in love with him. But you couldn’t be with him. 
“Maybe you should ask her.”
There were celebrities who were able to live normal lives. Some paid to have prosthetics for going outside of moved to a remote country to get out of the spotlight. He thrived off attention, but he could give that up. Avenging, he couldn’t give that up, but maybe he could cut back. Take a mission a month instead of one a week. Or maybe take more digital missions. He wasn’t just Iron Man after all. He was a genius, could hack into the Pentagon if he really wanted to. 
“Yeah,” he said. “Maybe I could talk to her.”
~ - ~
The moment you put your bag down on your lab table, Tony said, “You’re gonna be mad.”
You narrowed your brows. “What did you do?” You pressed your palm to your chest. “Oh my god, Peter overwrote my data, didn’t he? Ugh, I know he said he’s great at managing holograms, but really, Tone, you should’ve given him a tutorial before giving him access.” You brought up your holograms to check your data and analysis. 
“That’s not it.” Tony stood next to you as you looked through your files. “I did something that invaded your privacy.”
You tilted your head. Closing the holograms, you took a deep breath and slowly asked, “How?”
Tony flashed an embarrassed grin before sighing. “You’re gonna be shocked, too, so prepare yourself.”
You did not know where this was going at all. What horrible thing could Tony have done? Steeling yourself, you took a deep breath and nodded at him to continue. 
Tony cleared his throat. “Usually, I can tell when someone has feelings for me. People are obvious about it, but you? You aren’t. So, I had Friday do some analysis on our speech patterns. Me, being in love with you, was one of my controls. You and your dialogue regarding me was the main variable. 
“Long story short, I accessed some audio of you and Bruce talking, and you said that you loved me but could never tell me.” He glanced at you. “So that’s why I need to apologize.” 
Your expression didn’t change. No, that wasn’t it. You, at first, looked confused. Now, there was just nothing. No expression. No wrinkled brow in anger of flushed cheeks in embarrassment. Nothing. 
Tony blinked. “You can shout at me now. If you were confused about when to shout at me.”
You licked your lips before taking a deep breath. “Ok, that was a lot.” You pursed your lips then opened it. But, you couldn’t really think of anything to say. You didn’t even know how to feel. “So you know that I” -you pointed at yourself and then at him- “and that I didn’t wanna tell you.” You shook your head. “Wait, do you know why I didn’t want to tell you?”
A broken scoff left Tony’s lips. “Yeah. I’m a mess.”
It was your turn to scoff. “Wait, you’re a mess? That’s why you think I don’t want to tell you?”
“Among other reasons?”
Other reasons? 
You crossed your arms. “Ok, what other reasons?”
Tony looked offended. Still, he listed, “I’m surrounded by cameras, and everyone wants some privacy. Can’t get it if you’re with me. Then, there’s the Iron Man of it all. I went into a wormhole with a nuke. That was also all over the news. Then, there’s the whole daddy issues thing. I’m working on it, but it takes a while-”
He rambled on and on, listing reason after reason, and with each one, you felt tears well up in your eyes. It was a weird mix of heartbreaking, confusing, and enraging. The emotions built up slowly with each word that left his mouth, overwhelming you to the point that you couldn’t even say how it happened. 
But, as Tony paced and talked so horribly about himself, you somehow ended up in front of him with your hands on his cheeks. 
You only realized it when Tony stopped talking and when his breath touched your lips. “What?” he asked. 
You didn’t answer. You kissed him instead. 
It was a hard press of  your lips against his. It was short, and it wasn’t much. 
But by the way Tony gripped the back of your neck and pulled you back for another kiss, you’d think it was his first kiss. You knew it wasn’t. Not just because you knew he had kissed all sorts of people before you, but because he somehow knew how to make you gasp and melt into him. 
While one hand kept you steady, the other trailed down your back and pulled you closer to him. His lips moved fluidly against yours, pushing and pulling, and everytime he moved back, you chased his lips to continue the kiss, because the softness, the passion, the fact it was finally happening, was all too good. You didn’t want it to stop.
Your hands started to move. For someone so rich, his t-shirt was rough when you twisted it between your fingers and pulled it to you. Slowly, you trailed your fingers along the side of his neck. You rubbed your thumb along his pulse point, a reminder that this was indeed real. You were kissing Tony Stark, and- He was pulling away again.
Desperate, you leaned forward, reached around to hold onto his shoulder, and kissed the side of his neck. 
He let out a breathy laugh, and before you could suck on his skin, his stubble scratched your cheek. 
You looked up at him and giggled when his nose bumped into yours. When your giggles turned into a smile, he kissed you again, a soft and short kiss, before leaning his forehead against yours. 
His thumbs rubbed circles into your waist as you lightly scratched the back of his neck. He didn’t say anything. In fact, he seemed busy gazing at you.
“Speechless, Stark?” you teased. 
He laughed. For a few seconds, he just gazed at you, seeming to prove your point. Tony’s hand began to wander, from stroking your cheek to pushing back your hair. “More confused.”
Remembering why you interrupted him, you brought your hands to his cheeks again and held him there so he couldn’t look away from you. “You are amazing, Tony. That’s the reason I didn’t want to tell you.” You shrugged. “You’re too good for me.”
His fidgeting stopped. “Well, that’s not true.”
“Tony, you’re an Avenger.”
“Technically, you are also an Avenger.”
“You’re a genius.”
“Who can’t cook scrambled eggs.”
“You literally saved the universe.”
“After producing weapons of mass destruction for decades.”
You glared at him. 
He glared back. Then, he fought back. “I don’t plan on retiring.”
“Wouldn’t want you to.”
“I have severe PTSD, anxiety, maybe ADHD, all mixed with trauma galore.”
“And I will learn to help you.”
“I couldn’t give you a normal life.”
“I’d rather have you anyway.”
He opened his mouth, but you instead told him, “I’d rather have you than anything. As long as, well, for as long as  you’ll have me.”
He raised his eyebrow. “You sure about that?”
“Positive.”
Tony shook his head with a smile. “Cause, I’d rather have you for, well, how does til you get tired of me sound?”
You laughed. “Won’t happen. But, sure.” You kissed him again.You would’ve kept going, but there was something to settle first.  “By the way, Tony?”
“Yeah?”
“Is Friday recording right now?”
“Friday records everything. It’s in the contract.”
Friday added, “I record everything that happens in the tower.”
“Ok.” You could work with that. “I’ll forgive you for the invasion of privacy.”
Tony beamed, and you couldn’t help your own smile when he did. Still, you continued, “On one condition.” Your own smile turned devious. “I want evidence that Star Spangled Banner took my ice cream.”
Tony burst out laughing. He kissed you again, a deep kiss, and when he was done, he mumbled, “God, I love you,” against your lips.
287 notes · View notes
starshipsofstarlord · 3 years
Note
💕 reader turns into a baby and obsessed with Bucky. Awww 🥺
Infant Issues
Tumblr media
bucky barnes x reader / masterlist
warnings; fluff, morgan definitely being tony’s kid, biting, swearing, spoilers for IW and Endgame, mention of the blip, childish behaviour from adults, terrible humour (I really am sorry), spoiler for WV, mention of age gap, kinda a crossover, an absolute mess 😂
“Morgan?” Bucky frowned, as the girl tried to speed past him. It was not wise for anyone to allow the mischievous child run around the compound alone, she always got up to nothing but trouble, and there was such a glazing in her brown eyes.
She didn’t spare him a glance, instead, she bolted, causing the super soldier to sigh. He would have went after her if there weren’t already footsteps recurring from the path that she had just came from; it was his father. It so happened that there was a bundle of joy in his arms, crying like the sudden crack of dawn.
“What were you going to do, wait another five years to tell everyone about this one, Stark?” Bucky asked with a chuckle, though the cries from the infant muted at the sound of his voice. The child wiggled in Tony’s grasp, trying her utmost to reach out for the vibranium armed hero.
“She’s not my daughter, if she was, I think me and you would be having conversations.” Tony’s words spurred a frown to combust out onto Barnes’ face, and the billionaire sighed, shifting the baby so that the baby was in Bucky’s arms.
The child cooed up at him, her eyes were a baby blue, sure to avert possibly into a different colour once she grew elder. “Look, I didn’t ask if I could hold her, she’s cute, but why do you-“
“Morgan did it.” Tony willingly blamed his own daughter. With her various experimentations, she was definitely taking after him. He’d be sure to keep this one quiet from Pepper, otherwise he was almost certain that he’d be banned from bringing Morgan on expeditions to the compound.
“I though y/n was supposed to be watching her.” Stated the enhanced soldier, cocking his head at the information that he recalled. He promptly remembered you abandoning him half way through training the newbie recruits, because Happy was dropping Morgan off, and you had offered watch over her, despite the associate being there.
“She was, and now you’re going to have to watch over her.” Tony pointed specifically to the child in his arms, and that was when realisation hit Bucky. He gulped, breathing through his nose to calm himself, as all the pieces clicked perfectly together.
This was not just a child - it was you. As he gazed down at you, he could finally see the pouted expression that would fixate upon your face when you paid attention to him when you were drunk, there was a glazing over your eyes as you raised your small and innocent hands, scraping down the stubble of his chin, as you curled further into his arms.
“I am going to kill you.” He steadily spoke, huffing as Sam went to walk past, but stopped himself when he saw the bundle of joy that was content in the brooding soldier’s arms. 
“What the hell! Did you and y/n have a baby or something without telling anyone?” Oh, how he wished those were the circumstances, and if the pair of you were to ever have a child together, then he would be impartial to the idea of doing so.
"This is not my child, it's y/n, thanks to Stark over there." He bounced you in his arms, he even felt a small dribble of spit seep through his shirt, but he didn't mind, not as his icy glare was intently prized upon the philanthropist.
"Hey, it was my daughter's fault, not mine!" Tony excused himself from the blame, holding his palm against his chest, as he received as such. Sam ogled at him for a second, before returning his attention back into Bucky, and little you.
He came forwards, reaching his hand towards you, keening as you went to grasp his. As you did so, a smile broke out upon the man’s face, until it contorted into a sharp frown, the noise of a yelp escaping from his lips. “That little bitch bit me.”
“Language.” Steve rounded the corner, his golden brows raising when he saw the infant contently resting in his best friend’s arms. “Did you and y/n have a baby without telling us?”
“That’s what I said!” Sam beckoned to the blonde, as he averted a strong gaze to you and your normal sized partner. "Until she bit me, it reminds me of that time that I tried to steal her fries."
"I don't see why your complaining." Bucky rolled his eyes, bracing you up straighter so that your forehead was pressed lightly against his shoulder. "I'm the one whose partner is an actual child."
"Yeah, tell me about it." Sam rolled his eyes in reference to how you were beforehand, before Steve cut in, directing his leading tone towards the men that were stood idly by.
"What actually happened?" Tony found his enquiry to be an opportunity to avert the fault from himself; how lucky indeed was it that Steve asked such a thing.
"Technically it's your fault capsicle. Morgan found your prototype of your unsuccessful time machine. As you can see, she turned into a baby, much like Lang. And if you want to push the blame off of yourself, blame these two for their asses disappearing."
"Hey, if I wanted to disappear, I wouldn't have made such a dramatic exit. I'd have just left for my sister's." Crossing his arms, Sam shook his head at the man that was not wearing his iron suit. He was unable to take any responsibility, unless it was for his genius brain wave of creating the true transportation for the time heist.
"Well I'm going to keep that noted for any future repercussions." Oh, how Wilson regretting mentioning that now.
"You left it out, within your daughter's reach." Bucky quirked his brow, as he prepared to head towards the storage of the private laboratory that was shared between the two science bros.
"Technically, that was the big green guy." Bucky vouched not to listen to Stark, instead, he continued to walk, leaving the three other men in his rear view, though for the most part, he could still hear them bickering.
"Maybe we should turn you into a baby, I doubt much would change."
"Maybe we should turn you into a baby, I doubt much would change." Tony mimicked Steve, thus only proving his point. He was certainly a man that enjoyed pressing people's buttons, it was a shining attribute of the once playboy, and god, did it annoy the hell out of Barnes.
As he entered the laboratory, he found the lab to be in a state of havoc. "Hey, it wasn't me this time." Scott laughed, as he used an extinguisher against the frayed machine, that was blubbering sparks from its ruined exterior.
"Smash!" A small green child, wearing glasses that were far too big for him, ran across the room, followed shortly by a child with long blonde hair wrapped up in a red cape, as though it were some kind of makeshift diaper.
"Explain." Bucky bluntly stated, clenching his jaw, as he cooed lightly at your cries that pierced the air. He bounced you in his arms, not quite certain of what he was supposed to do.
In his time, there wasn't exactly an education system to teach the men going to war how to parent, or even care for a child. A part of him panicked; it was you, he hated seeing you cry in general, but now he couldn't attempt to find out the cause for your falling tears.
"Aw is that y/n?" The man half dressed in his ant man suit asked, a bright smile on his face, as he reached out to hold you. To say Bucky was hesitant to pass you to him was an understatement. "I have a daughter, I've looked after a baby before."
"From jail?" The white wolf asked, as he heard a crash exhibit from the connecting room, obviously being the fault of the two most destructive avengers, or at least, their little versions. Being aged down was definitely certification for trouble, everyone knew that.
"Okay I wasn't in there for that long." Scott reassured him, he picked up a bottle of milk from the table, handing it to the metal armed man, whom had never fed a child before. He found himself, cautiously, keeping a watchful eye, passing you over to the former criminal, intently watching every movement that the man made.
Lange simply fed you. "Always thought you and y/n would have a cute baby, imagine its- oh yeah, well after all that stuff that happened with vision and SWORD, we thought it best to destroy any technology that was recovered from the old base. This part survived, and well, I went into its- okay, you don't want to hear the science, but basically Thor insisted he could break it with his hammer, albeit whilst I was inside of it, and it sent energy around the room that turned them into pubescent children."
"I can see that it did nothing to you. And I thought Morgan did it.”
"I was so relieved, lucky I- wait, was that an insult?" Bucky remained primitively silent, and that answered Scott's question. The hero sighed, as you finished nursing, and your arms reached for Bucky, to whom he passed you to. “And I lied...”
He literally blamed a five year old for the screw up of grown men. Tony was going to thrive off this information, whence he knew that his daughter was in fact not the culprit.
"What do we do now?" He was eager to find a cure for this betrothed science. Those whom were responsible for your decrease in age, well, one was running around the compound, and the other, well, he was even younger than Morgan currently.
"You could wait twenty years, I mean you two already have quite a big age gap, and please don't kill me. I'm not sure that Cap would approve, I am a vital source to the team!"
"I'm not going to kill you tic tac. Or at least not at least until we fix these three."
"Phew." Scott wiped his brow, blowing air from his mouth. "Wait thre- oh yeah, the little guy carrying the hammer that is bigger than himself, and the
"Okay, we need someone smarter." Bucky sighed heavily, as he hugged you in thought. "You tried hitting it again with the hammer?"
"Oh my god, I could be worthy!" Gasped Scott, running off to the next room, only to come back limping, a pained expression on his face. "Little Asguardian bastard hit me!"
Bucky contained his smirk, and instead passed you to Lang, venturing into the other part of the lab, finding that Bruce was asleep, a blob of snot hanging from his nose, he could see the hammer in the middle of the room, almost as though it were waiting for him to attempt grabbing the handle, and Thor was-
The minuscule god jumped from one of the shelves, wrapping his arms around the front of Bucky’s neck, as he put all his weight on the super soldier’s back. In all practicality, Thor was strangling him, and Bucky tapped his arm, trying to convince him to let go.
“I know who Noobmaster69 is.” Thor quirked his head, lessening his hold, as he promptly awaited his now older friend to continue. “It’s, its- his name is Wade Wilson.”
“Wilson!” No, gosh no. Bucky stood completely, making sure to keep Thor in the vicinity, he needed him to be so so that he could reverse the affects on the son of Odin.
“Not Sam. Wade.” He had never met the man before, but god did he seem like a dick. When the pair of you were getting a taxi, the driver Dopinder just could not shut up about his friend, who liked to wear red, and had a kink for unicorns.
Wade certainly sounded like a weird one, but right now, his pass time was getting Thor to pick up that hammer. “Where can I find this Wade?” It practically left his mouth as a hiss, if the imagery and proven death supposed otherwise, he’d possibly think it was Loki instead.
“I will tell you, if you pick up that hammer, and hit it against that old machine. Got it buddy?”
“It’s name is Stormbreaker!” Bellowed the norseman, who tried to slide off his back, but Bucky kept a hold of his legs, refraining him from going anywhere. “Get peter to do it, I don’t want to play that game anymore!”
“Uuh, hi Mr Barnes...” That voice, oh he knew it, and the majority of the time it irritated him, he was Tony's little pet. “And, baby avengers?”
“Don’t ask kid.” Peter nodded, as he went to reach for a spanner. “Can you pick the hammer up, are you worthy?”
“Am I worthy?” He wondered aloud, his eyes fixated on the hammer, as he stepped towards it, holding his hand out, and clasping his palm around the handle, it feeling weightless in his grip, as he picked it up without effort. “Oh my god (it’s Robert Downey Junior)!”
“Great, now take it out there, I’ll deal with these two. And don’t do anything yet.” He was certainly feeling like a sergeant, throwing all the orders to the others, Peter complied, carrying the hammer as though it were an empty duffel.
“Can I try?” Instantly, after Peter passing it to him, Scott had such hope, until the force of gravity hit, and it fell on his foot, causing a light scream to ripple through his throat. “Get it off, get it off!”
Peter did so, as Bucky kept Thor on his shoulders, and grabbed a hold of Bruce’s chubby little ankle, dragging him into the other room. “Shit he’s heavy.” He saw that you were sat in the grand spinny chair, making Bucky relived that you weren’t in Lang’s arms as he attempted to have a moment of worthiness.
“What’d you do, go all Winter soldier on his ass and knock him out?!” Half screamed the prodigy of Hank Pym.
“Of course not, I think Thor did it.”
“Oh yeah, blame the kid because I did the same.”
“Put your suit from Stark on kid, unless you want to become a fetus.” Bucky ignored Scott for the moment,
“I got Hope to send her outfit, it will stretch to accommodate you, but I also think it would hug your shape nicely.”
“That was fast.” Muttered Peter, and Bucky shook his head, eyeing the outfit with weird eyes.
“I’m crazy, but not crazy enough to wear that.” Sighing, he grasped it in his hands, walking to the other room to squeeze into it. He noticed you watching, and thus he turned the chair around so that you couldn’t see anything. Little did he realise until he came out, that you had spun it around again, and was giggling. “Don’t laugh at me, or you won’t be allowed to see it when you’re returned to normal.”
A pout settled on your small lips, and it appeared as though you were getting ready to cry again, but before you could do so, a distraction intervened. An uninvited, and confusing one.
“Stop. Can I just say, that is some cruel declaration for the both of you, you’re my fave ship, after me and Hugh Jackman of course, but he doesn’t even know that this version of me exists.” A newfound imposter called out, his arms raised in the air. Leather gloves crinkled as he twitched his fingers, his white eyes freaking Scott the fuck out. “May I join you on this journey? I read about you guys in comics. And can I just say, I want to see these hunks and that hottie all grown up.”
“You want to see me go Winter Soldier on someone Lang?” Bucky gritted his teeth, prepared to murder this man for ever posing such words about you into the open air. Him speaking obviously drew some attention to him though, but it was not his rage that was mentioned, instead, it was his attire- or well, Hope’s.
“Nice suit Buck Buck. Can you do a twirl for me, I wanna see if it competes with America’s ass. Damn, does that man have some buns on him.”
“I know right!” Scott eagerly agreed, earning a smack in the nuts, to which had made him close to crumbling.“You had to use the metal hand, didn’t you.” Whimpered the Ant to the false Wasp, clamping his hands over his goods as he half hunched over. “I thought you often forgot to use it coz your right handed.”
“You’re on my left.” Gross, he sounded like Sam.
“Who the hell are you?” Thor spoke, and it felt familiar on his tongue. It was as though he had asked an enemy the same thing before...
“I, am Noobmaster69.”
“Hi, I’m Peter. Oh, we’re using our made up names, I thought Sam said it was that guy from that tech place.” Peter scratched his head through the mask, providing a small verbal distraction, as Thor willingly set himself free, launching at the intruder, whilst snatching the hammer from a suited up Peter.
“Aaasrrrghh.” He screamed like a true deity of the vikings.
“Thor, no!” Lang screamed, knowing that he’d have to come up with another excuse. The cameras had been fused whence Thor had first struck the hammer in the room, and it abused the guy in the red suit as he went for his legs, attacking the friend of Dopinder.
989 notes · View notes
loostssoul · 3 years
Text
if you kissed me - Rodrick Heffley | 1.9k
Yeah yeah i know i haven't written since a million years ago. and yeah yeah i know this is my first real fanfiction i posted on tumblr. fair warning, i'm not the best writer, i honestly just do this for fun and i'm totally up to criticism because i do want to make my writing better. if this is literally inaccurate, im sorry its been like 5 years since i've read the books. Anyway, I hope you enjoy this fluff-fest that I created in the span of a few hours.
paring: rodrick x reader genre: fluff. lots of fluff
Tumblr media
Credits to the maker of the picture! 15 Days till the Contest | 9:42 PM, Saturday
Plick, plick, plick
My speakers were blasting so loud I almost didn’t hear the sound of pebbles hitting my window.
Plick, plick, plick
I rubbed my eyes and slammed my laptop shut, walking toward my bedroom window. Peering down, I saw a figure a few yards down from my second-story bedroom, looking back up at me. Dark brown, messy hair that stuck up around his face. A red and black flannel, black ripped jeans, and, (of course) a tee-shirt with “Loded Diper” clumsily written on it. A grin spread on his face as he saw my face come into his view, causing me to blush. Rodrick Heffley, Crossland High bad boy, and my boyfriend.
I unlocked the latch to my window and stuck my head out, taking in the cool air and letting the neighbors enjoy the music I was playing (they never did). I looked down.
“Y/N!” He whisper-yelled
“Evening, Heffley.”
“I need to tell you something!”
“What’s so important that you have to scratch my window instead of using the power of modern technology to call me?”
His mouth opened to give me a response, but nothing came out. I smirked, “Come on up.”
I opened the window wider as he climbed the trellis that lined the back of my house. I backed up to my door and locked it. Precautions, my parents liked Rodrick but they definitely wouldn’t approve of him in my room at night. I looked back and I saw him, every feature of him illuminated by the light of my room. His cheeky smile and chocolate brown eyes. He slowly closed the window and walked toward me, brushing a strand of hair out of my face. I still got butterflies whenever he touched me.
“Hey, Spiderman. What did ya climb in here to tell me?” I asked
“I got Loded Diper into a contest.”
My eyes widened, Loded Diper, my boyfriend’s rock band, wasn’t exactly known for being the best. It was mostly known for his mom’s insane dance moves during the Plainview Talent Show. But of course, i'll never say that in front of his face.
“You did?! That’s awesome Rodrick!”
“Yeah! It's a battle of the bands contest, we’re going against two other bands. I really think this is gonna be our big break!” His eyes sparkled in excitement.
His happiness was contagious, he was like a goddamn puppy. I pulled him into my arms. “I’m proud of you Rod.” I muttered and smiled into his collarbone. I felt him inhale the scent of my hair and twirl my locks around his fingers.
“Hey,” he said, breaking the hug. “I’m having practice tomorrow with the band, you wanna come?”
“Sure. I go to every practice anyway, why miss out on this one?” I shrugged.
He chuckled and looked at me. Really looked at me. That’s one of the reasons why I fell for him. It never seemed like it, but he paid attention. We’ve only been dating for 4 months, but he knew me like no one else did, and I knew that in the way he looked at me. I felt his hand cup my face, his thumb rubbing my cheek in small circles. I looked up at him, noticing how tall he was, how close he was. Was I the one who leaned in? Was he the one who leaned in? Did we just do it subconsciously? Did he want this? Was he ready? Was I ready?
The ringing of Rodrick’s phone filled the room. The daze we were trapped in was gone and we separated, our faces red. Rodrick picked up the phone, it was his mom.
“Yeah, mom? Mom...I’m in the middle of something. I’ll do laundry later, ok? Now? C’mon… Alright, fine. Bye.” He hung up. “Sorry, I gotta blast.”
“It’s fine, I’ll see you tomorrow?” I asked him as he started toward my window.
He looked back at me and planted a kiss on my forehead, the farthest we’ve ever gone with physical touch as a couple.
“Tomorrow”
~~✰✰✰~~
14 Days till the Contest | 1:22 PM, Saturday afternoon
“Should we take it from the top?”
Practice wasn’t going so well. I could feel the nervousness, the tension. Drums were slightly off beat, the guitarist’s fingers would fly to the wrong places on the fretboard, lyrics would go all over the place. The contest was two weeks away, and Loded Diper was already feeling the anxiousness. I sat on the floor of the garage, on top of a picnic blanket I found. To Rodrick’s dismay, his mom forced him to let Greg watch band practice, as a form of “brother-to-brother bonding time.” Greg sat next to me, mockingly covering his ears.
“Oh thank god, it's done.” Greg said with an immense amount of sarcasm and uncovering his ears.
Rodrick threw a crumpled-up piece of paper at his head, “Shut up.”
“Both of you, be nice.” I laughed. “I think you guys should take a break for a while, maybe shake off the nerves.”
“Good idea Y/N, 20 minute break everyone!” The lead singer said. Everyone spread out, grabbing a piece of pizza ordered earlier and laying down. Greg ran out of the garage, yelling, “I’m free!”
Rodrick stood up and began gulping down a bottle of water. He wore a black tanktop and black ripped jeans, sweat dripping down his forehead. I ran up behind him and wrapped my arms around his torso. He turned and faced me, running his hands through my hair, lost in thought.
“You ok, Rod?” I asked him.
He sighed, “nerves”
I leaned my head on his chest, “You’re gonna do great, you’ve done so many gigs in the past. Think of this as one of those!”
He smiled at me, “You know what would make me feel a lot less nervous?”
“Oh god. What?”
A really common thing Rodrick did was try to bargain a kiss on the lips from me. It's been an ongoing joke, a meaningless bit he did all the time. I’ll do my homework if you kissed me on the lips. I’ll smile in the picture if you kissed me on the lips. It still hasn’t worked.
“I might be less nervous if you kissed me on the lips.” He whispered to me.
I rolled my eyes, “If that’s what it takes then I think you’ll lose the competition.”
He let go of me and laughed, my favorite laugh. “Worth a try.” He shrugged, going off to join his bandmates and the pizza. But as I watched him smile and laugh with his friends, I lost myself. I thought about the previous night. The way we fit into each other, the closeness, the fact that was so close that I could see my reflection in his eyes.
Maybe I should just say yes.
~~✰✰✰~~
The Day of the Contest
For the past 2 weeks, Rodrick has given me the “kiss-bargain” joke 9 times. Every time, I deflected it with sarcastic remarks, and every time I regretted not agreeing.
I sat on the front steps of my porch, waiting for Rodrick to pick me up. I regretted the jean shorts and plain black tee-shirt I had on, as a cold breeze brushed my skin. I pulled my black leather jacket on, which I painted “Loded Diper” on the back in white paint. Then, I heard it. The echo of heavy metal turned to full blast, and… the faint sound of something big getting knocked over. Oh god, they’re here. The white van with “Loded Diper” written in huge words screeched to a halt in front of my house.
The window rolled down, revealing my boyfriend and his excited grin. “Get in.”
~~✰✰✰~~
30 minutes till Loded Diper preforms
It felt surreal to be backstage, and really exciting. Energy was flowing through the room, as all the other bands talked and played. The rest of the band members seemed excited, full of adrenaline. Except for Rodrick, he’s been nervous ever since soundcheck. His leg was bouncing,he twirled his drumsticks around, drumming them on random objects, and his eyes stared into nothing.
“Rodrick, you want me to do your eyeliner?”
“Huh?” He didn’t take his eyes away from the ground, his voice seemed far away.
I lifted a liquid eyeliner pen I had in my pocket, “Eyeliner. I just did mine, we can match!”
He lifted his head and noticed me. I had my eyeliner smudged, just like he always does during a gig. He grinned, “Yeah. Yeah sure.”
I’ve done his eyeliner many times in the past, and I loved doing it because I had to be as close to him as possible. So I hopped onto his lap, pressing myself close to him, trying to comfort him with my warmth.
“Close your eyes.” I ordered.
As I applied his eyeliner, I could feel his heartbeat against my chest. It was heavy, and fast. I’m pretty sure I would still hear it if I wasn’t as close to him as I was, even though the loud music blasting through the theatre.
“Done”
He opened his eyes, and butterflies flooded my stomach. We were close. Very close. Should I do it? Should I lean in?
Rodrick probably sensed my flustered-ness. He smirked, “Cat got your tongue?”
I rolled my eyes, blushing hard. “Shut up.” I said, playfully punching him.
~~✰✰✰~~
“5 Minutes until Loded Diper performs!” A man exclaimed to us.
Rodrick was as nervous as ever. We’ve been standing on the left wing of the stage, watching the other bands play. It felt like a bunch of Loded Diper copy-pastes. A bunch of high schoolers, weird names, very aggressive playing. But they were still pretty good. Rodrick was biting the nails of one of his hands and tapping his other hand on the wall behind him. I looked up at him and held his hand, stopping it from fidgeting. He smiled nervously.
Now or never Y/N…
“Hey, you said that if I kiss you, you won’t be as nervous. Right?”
He looked at me, wide eyed. He seemed to be trying to compute what I said.
I stood on tiptoe and put his face in my hands. It was that night all over again. Every detail of his face, of him was in full view. His eyes, his eyeliner, his scent, his lips. I leaned in.
His lips were soft against mine, but they were tense, flustered. I was terrified, It was the wrong place, the wrong time. Until I felt one hand in my hair, another on my waist, pulling me closer.
How long was the kiss? A few seconds? It felt like minutes, hours. Sparked ignited. Butterflies flew in my stomach. His scent was the only thing I smelled, his warmth was the only thing I felt. The music faded away. Everything faded away. It was just him and I. Until we broke apart, taking in deep breaths of each other. We wanted more, but Loded Diper was playing in a few seconds.
“Hey, Rodrick.”
“Yeah?”
“If you win I’ll kiss you again”
We both knew I would kiss him regardless.
I didn't edit this because editing is for wimps (just kidding be responsible and edit your work)
please like and reblog because it gives me serotonin and i need that
791 notes · View notes
havenoffandoms · 3 years
Note
Hey congrats on 900 followers! Would I be able to request the touch starved prompt from your list with the pairing Aiden/Lambert please? Love all your writing!
Hello!! Thanks for requesting this prompt and this pairing! I’ve been on a right Lambden kick recently, so I felt inspired. I hope you like it! 
Prompt 13: Touch-Starved
Pairing: Aiden x Lambert
Warnings: None
Prompt List
Lambert was apprehensive about many things concerning Aiden when the two started travelling together. Being stabbed to death in his sleep comes to mind, or having Aiden go all batshit crazy if Lambert dared to beat him at Gwent. Lambert has heard many rumours about Cat witchers in his long life. Cats are batshit crazy. Cats are emotionally volatile. Cats are backstabbing sons of bitches… literally and metaphorically. Cats are bad. Cats are evil, etc, etc. All these rumours circulated in Kaer Morhen long before Lambert even set foot in that ramshackle castle. He was too young to have witnessed the Tournament, but he heard the older witchers talk. Later in his life, when only a handful of wolf witchers were left after the sacking, Eskel gave Lambert a more detailed account of the Tournament.
“The Cats betrayed us, went on a rampage. Killed many wolf witchers in the process. Geralt and I lost many friends that day,” Eskel told him one evening, when the oldest surviving wolf was too far in his cup to notice that he was oversharing. “Radowit’s court mage Astrogarus promised the Cats monopoly on killing monsters within Kaedwen in exchange for attacking the Wolves during the tournament. Turns out Radowit was a backstabbing motherfucker himself. He ordered his soldiers to shoot all of the remaining witchers of both schools in the arena.”
“Lemme guess,” Lambert spoke, his own speech slightly slurred, “pretty boy saved the day?” 
Eskel shook his head. “Fled. Mousesack helped him escape the massacre. Poor bastard never forgave himself for abandonin’ our brothers, but what choice did he have?”
Don’t get Lambert wrong. He’s not saying that Aiden is harmless, far from it. The guy’s lethal with his swords, deadly with a pair of daggers, not to mention a stealthy and clever thief. Aiden is mercurial, hot-tempered and a bit feral when he wants to be, and his morals are at best dubious. Whereas wolf witchers had their emotions beaten out of them at a young age, cat witchers feel too much, too strongly. Lambert’s witnessed Aiden flip tables when peasants beat him at Gwent, but he’s also witnessed the Cat shed a tear after bringing the news to a mother that her son did not survive the ghoul attack two villages down the road. 
Lambert was apprehensive about many things concerning Aiden when the two started travelling together, but the Cat had never ceased to surprise him. The most unexpected trait Aiden has displayed to date is his insatiable need for physical contact. It’s not like Lambert hates being touched - he’s only human, albeit a mutated one, but still human. He enjoys a hug as much as the next person, especially when said hug comes from one of his brothers (or, dare he say, Vesemir) at the end of a long and difficult year on the Path. Lambert has also never begrudged a bed partner a post-coital cuddle session. Aiden’s need for physical contact is… on a whole different level. 
The first time it happened, Lambert almost shoved the Cat off him and sent him packing, until he realised that Aiden was not only hugging him, but clinging onto him. His sharp nails were digging in the soft material of Lambert’s shirt, the fabric creaking in protest under the firm grip. When Lambert looked down, he noticed the pinched eyebrows and tears trailing down Aiden’s face. It wasn’t until a broken sob pushed past the Cat’s lips that Lambert reluctantly returned the embrace, arms wound tightly around Aiden’s trembling body. Aiden eventually settled in the safety of Lambert’s arms, his features softening as he sank back into a peaceful slumber. 
Neither mentioned the previous evening’s impromptu cuddling session, but from that moment one, it was like someone had flicked a switch. Aiden came up with every possible fucking excuse to touch Lambert. Their hands would always accidentally graze each other when they packed up camp, or tacked up the horses. Aiden would bump shoulders with him when they were travelling on foot. If they sat next to one another in a tavern, Aiden would press his leg against Lambert’s, and if they were facing each other, a tentative foot would gently nudge Lambert’s shin and linger there. It’s not like Aiden was trying to hide his intentions, either. They rarely paid for two rooms anymore, because even if they did, Aiden would always end up in Lambert’s bed anyway, arms wound around Lambert’s body like a koala clinging to its mother.
Lambert doesn’t hate Aiden’s need for physical proximity, he’s just… confused by it. Aiden rarely takes any lovers to bed, even though he clearly craves physical intimacy. Lambert is more than happy to cuddle with Aiden, especially when they are forced to sleep under the stars and the early autumn frosts begin to settle over the region. It saves them from lighting a campfire, which may attract the wrong kind of attention to them. That’s all that’s ever transpired between the two, though… cuddling. Lambert enjoys the cuddling as much as Aiden does, but for Aiden it seems to be about more than mere enjoyment. The Cat simply refuses to go without physical intimacy which at times can be… alright, it can feel overbearing, but Lambert’s not about to complain, not when most humans turn away from him in disgust and contempt when he tries to chat them up. 
Over the course of the next few weeks, Aiden almost develops a form of separation anxiety. He refuses to let Lambert out of his sight, going so far as to follow the man everywhere, and that’s the moment when Lambert snaps. 
“Don’t you have somewhere to be?” he asks, his tone hiding none of the irritation he feels at being tailed by this overgrown tomcat. Aiden stops dead in his tracks, his eyes growing wide at Lambert’s words. 
“Huh?” 
“You’ve been following me since this morning… I have errands to run and it’s hard to do that when you’re breathing down my neck!”
Lambert instantly regrets his words the minute they leave his mouth. Aiden’s shoulders visibly sag at Lambert’s comment, his content expression melting into something sadder and the sight tugs at the wolf’s heartstrings in all the wrong ways. Aiden averts Lambert’s eyes shyly, the tip of his ears turning a pretty shade of pink as embarrassment washes over him. Lambert heaves a sigh. Way to act like a fucking dick. 
“Sorry, Aiden. I… I didn’t mean to sound like an ass, but-”
“It’s alright, I… I knew this moment would come eventually.”
“What are you talking about?” Lambert asks, a confused frown etched on his face. Aiden doesn’t look at him when he replies in a voice far too small to belong to the lethal, cocky witcher Lambert has come to know over the past few months. 
“You’re gonna ask me to leave for good. I get it. I… I’ll go back to the room and pack my things.” 
As Aiden turns around to leave, Lambert’s hand shoots out and grabs a hold of Aiden’s wrist. Before Lambert’s brain has a chance to catch up, he finds himself pulling Aiden into a nearby alley, away from prying eyes of judgemental humans meandering the stalls of the midweek market. Aiden looks so unsure now, so vulnerable like this, and it makes Lambert want to wrap the Cat up in warm blankets and cuddle him and forget the world for a while. Instead, he settles on pressing Aiden’s back against the wall and draping himself around the Cat witcher as much as he can. 
“That’s not what I meant,” Lambert breathes in the air pocket between them as he locks eyes with Aiden, “you’ve just been… especially clingy recently. Are you sure you’re alright?”
Aiden averts his eyes once again, but Lambert is quick to grip the other man’s chin and force Aiden to meet his gaze. Even that simple touch pulls a small hiss from Aiden, whose eyes flutter shut as he relishes in the feeling of Lambert touching him anywhere. Lambert purses his lips, eager for an answer. 
“Aiden-”
“Winter is around the corner,” Aiden whispers, his tongue darting out to lick his suddenly dry lips. Lambert’s frown deepens. 
“And?”
His question is met with a pointed eye roll from Aiden. 
“And… wolves return to their dens for winter, don’t they? I was just… enjoying the last few weeks in your company before you leave and never come back.”
As the final piece of the puzzle slots into place, understanding dawns on Lambert. He pulls away from Aiden and the small whimper the loss of contact triggers does not go unnoticed. Something old and fragile aches in Lambert’s chest as the meaning of Aiden’s words sink in. Aiden isn’t just worried about being separated from Lambert for a few months, but he’s worried that Lambert will never come back.The wolf links his fingers with his Cat’s, squeezing softly as he leans into Aiden’s space and rubs his bearded cheek against Aiden’s jawline. The latter quickly melts under the soft ministrations, the soft content rumble deepening into a continuous purr as Lambert nuzzles the crook of Aiden’s neck. 
“Why didn’t you say something sooner?” 
“Yeah, right,” Aiden snorts in response, “cause you’re so good with feelings and shit.”
“Not everyone’s a sappy sentimental bitch like you are,” Lambert teases gently, earning himself a half-hearted slap up the back of the head. “I don’t have to go back to Kaer Morhen this winter.”
Aiden tenses, his soft purring stopping abruptly as he takes in Lambert’s words. Lambert continues to rub his cheek against Aiden’s jaw, his neck, his cheek… wherever he can reach, the action meant to soothe the brewing storm in Aiden’s mind.
“It’s your home,” Aiden offers weakly, “I don’t want… I… it’s your home.” 
“I can send a letter to the old man. Let him know I’m alive. We could find a den somewhere else… an attic somewhere, or an abandoned castle.” Lambert nuzzles the spot right behind Aiden’s ear, earning a pleased hum from the Cat. “Or you could come with me.”
“Sure. Cause that’s gonna end well…” 
“That’s settled then. I’m spending winter with you.”
Aiden pushes Lambert away, their eyes meeting once again but this time, Aiden searches for any trace of a lie in Lambert’s amber gaze. He finds none, because Lambert is one hundred percent honest in his offer. He would ditch Vesemir, Geralt and Eskel for a year to spend it with Aiden… and the thought should scare him more than it does, truthfully. He’s only known the Cat for a few months, and yet… well, maybe Lambert was dreading the winter as well. How about that? It’s not like he felt equally anxious about leaving Aiden, it’s just… fuck off. 
“You mean that?” 
“Mhm. Fair warning… I hate the cold. If I’m spending the winter with you, you’ll have to find a way to keep me warm or I will bite your head off.” 
In Aiden’s defence, he does keep Lambert warm all winter long. Their cuddling finally turns into something more, and from the moment Lambert and Aiden cross that fateful line there is no going back. Aiden becomes insatiable, always seeking Lambert’s body in some shape or form, never letting the wolf out of his sight again.  Lambert may have been apprehensive about many things concerning Aiden when the two started travelling together, but it turns out that all his worries were for nothing. Turns out Cat witchers are still crazy, and feral, and mercurial… a tad possessive as well, something Lambert doesn’t hate... but they’re also the cuddliest sons of bitches on the Continent. 
Lambert can live with that, he thinks. 
Request a prompt.
249 notes · View notes
makeste · 3 years
Text
BnHA Chapter 308: VIBE: CHECKED
Previously on BnHA: Lots and lots of Shindou idk what else to tell you.
Today on BnHA: Tired Nomad Deku rescues Shindou from Muscular, and us from Shindou. Muscular is all “OH BOY I SURE CAN’T WAIT TO FIGHT DEKU AGAIN AFTER HE TOTALLY KICKED MY ASS THE LAST TIME!! I’M SURE THIS TIME WILL GO DIFFERENTLY SEEING AS HE’S HAD ALMOST AN ENTIRE YEAR’S WORTH OF ADDITIONAL TRAINING, AND ALSO HAS SIX FOURQUIRKS NOW, IN ADDITION TO THE CONFIDENCE THAT COMES WITH HAVING EIGHT OTHER PEOPLE’S SOULS CHILLING OUT INSIDE HIM OFFERING MORAL SUPPORT AND ENCOURAGEMENT.” Deku is all, “[kicks Muscular’s ass effortlessly].” Muscular is all, “[gets his ass totally kicked].” I for one am very satisfied with this, and with respect to all, I would like to hereby declare this post a discourse-free zone. I’m just happy to see my son out here making good use of his FOURQUIRKS, and more importantly beating Muscular in less than seventeen pages so we can all go on with our lives lol.
damn Deku since when were you allowed to look this cool
Tumblr media
from this perspective and with the smoke, cape, backpack, and mask more or less obscuring his actual profile, he looks less like a sixteen-year-old boy and more like a grownass man
OH SNAP
Tumblr media
we got a glimpse of this in the cleaned-up scan of 307, but seeing both of his eyes looking so distinctively All Might-esque here is... whoa. I mean we know that his face still looks pretty normal underneath the mask and he doesn’t actually have the black sclera, but still, this is an awesome look. mini-Might
lol Muscular
Tumblr media
you and me both. I mean no offense, but yeah
so Deku is just standing there silently
Tumblr media
typical Deku. tight-lipped and expressionless. mum’s the word. quiet as a mouse. silent as a grave
okay no but seriously this is so weird and creepy though you guys. Deku please say something or else I’m just gonna mindlessly say whatever stupid things come into my head in an effort to make things less awkward
so Muscular is all “I should probably make a cool speech about revenge but Horikoshi couldn’t think of anything good so I’m just going to stand here clenching my fist real slowly”
Tumblr media
“I’m not here to go on a monologue” he says, as he monologues about not monologuing
okay you guys I confess I have only read through/watched the Deku VS Muscular fight once because the arm-breaking is just way too uncomfortable for me to revisit. and so as a result, I have completely forgotten Whatever The Deal Is with Muscular’s eye lmao so let me go look it up real quick
okay so it’s a prosthetic, obviously, and he changes it out according to his mood. that part does sound familiar. I just can’t remember which eye is supposed to indicate which mood. don’t tell me I actually have to go back and reread this shit
lol I’m skimming through chapter 75 now and remembering/realizing that I hardly paid any attention to this the first time around because as soon as I found out the villains were after Kacchan my brain was like “TIME TO FOCUS ON THIS AND ONLY THIS NOW AND FOREVER” and yeah. ah memories
anyway so he started out with the flower-looking eye, and then later on he was all
Tumblr media
which begs the question, how on earth could I have ever forgotten the most ridiculous panel I’ve ever read lmao
anyway, but so after all of that, I'm only just now realizing that this isn't one of his previous eye prosthetics in the current chapter; this is an ACTUAL FUCKING ROCK that he's just randomly shoved into his eye socket fkdsjlk
Tumblr media
so basically (1) I did all of that painstaking research for nothing, five whole minutes of my life wasted THANKS A LOT, and (2) what, and I have never meant this more emphatically, THE FUCK
anyway so now he's leaping at the building that Deku is standing on top of. but he’s not aiming anywhere near Deku though, wtf
(ETA: HAHA YOU BROKE ALL YOUR MUSCLES YOU LOSER.)
...huh
Tumblr media
lmao okay then. I hope those annoying citizens in the building next door are watching this go down and rethinking their life choices
dlkdkljk
Tumblr media
just keep standing there pressed right up against the window, why don’t you. “WHAT’S GOING ON THIS SUPER CLOSE COLLAPSING BUILDING IS BLOCKING OUR VIEW.” well, folks, we’ve long since known there’s a critical shortage of hero and villain brain cells, but what we’re learning now is that civilian brain cells are also in short supply
OH THANK GOD DEKU IS FINALLY TALKING THAT WAS ACTUALLY UNSETTLING AS FUCK
Tumblr media
SO HE’S STILL OUR GOOD, POLITE, WORRIED, CONSIDERATE DEKU UNDERNEATH THAT COOL AND MYSTERIOUS VENEER. for real, thank fuck, because I swear to god if he suddenly started acting like the Dekus in all of the vigilante AUs my interest in this series would have dropped something like 50% lol. just because he dropped out of school and ran away from home and is currently dressed like the physical manifestation of a Linkin Park playlist doesn’t mean he’s not still the WORLD’S BIGGEST DORK okay
I MEAN, THIS RIGHT HERE. THIS IS WHAT I’M TALKING ABOUT. HE’S APOLOGIZING FOR THE DELAY
Tumblr media
PLEASE FIND THE ATTACHED SHINDOU YOU REQUESTED. BEST REGARDS!!!
OH MY GOD WHY IS HE SUCH A BADASS
Tumblr media
something about making bold, confident statements while obscured in smoke?? idk but damn it fucking works
ffjkkl
Tumblr media
more importantly, should you tell him you actually need your copy of Shindou in excel format and not pdf?? on the one hand you don’t want to sound ungrateful, but on the other hand what are you even supposed to do with this
this chapter so far consists of like 50% smoke, but on the other hand Deku VS Kacchan 2 had a lot of cinematic smoke too so who am I to complain
OMG IS IT HIS ARMS
Tumblr media
IDK DID YOU?! TELL ME YOUR SECRETS. PLEASE, AT SOME POINT THIS FIGHT HAS GOT TO ACTUALLY ADVANCE THE PLOT
OHHHHHHH
Tumblr media
IT’S EN’S QUIRK!! OH MY GOD OKAY THAT’S ACTUALLY AWESOME
Tumblr media
I CAN HEAR THE SOUND OF DISCOURSE RUMBLING IN THE BACKGROUND BUT I DON’T CARE LOL. WON’T CATCH ME EVER SAYING NO TO ANOTHER SIXQUIRK. GO AHEAD, BRING THEM ON, I WANT TO SEE THEM ALL but take it easy though Deku. don’t want to give yourself lung cancer or anything
also it’s good to see that in a very real sense he’s not fighting alone. the Vestiges really did mean it when they said they could appear more easily now. this is on a whole other level
so is this whole next page still En talking, or someone else? because whoever it is sure is chatty
Tumblr media
okay, several things
pretty sure it is En, because he keeps saying “I suppose.” for someone who never said two words until one page ago, this guy sure never shuts up. we can’t all follow Muscular’s lead I suppose. oh my god now I’m doing it too
really like the suggestion of Deku using the SIXQUIRKS like tools in an arsenal, because that’s what he’s good at! it’s almost like he’s been training for this his entire life. “you value quirks too much” LOOK HE JUST THINKS THEY’RE COOL OKAY IS THAT A CRIME
where the fuck did all this rope come from
not gonna ask what the fuck that thing is sticking out from the back of his utility belt. Horikoshi will surely explain this
is that a fucking jetpack. I’m sorry Deku were six fucking quirks not enough for you. you can fucking float??? but JUST TO BE SAFE, LET’S STRAP A PAIR OF ROCKETS TO OUR SHOULDERS IDK
-- or wait, is this all supposed to be like a visual representation of En’s metaphor?? OH MY GOD AM I JUST STUPID LOL, DON’T ANSWER THAT. NEVER MIND. NEW LIST!!
rope = blackwhip
jetpack = float
radio = danger sense
and so I’m guessing that this ridiculously phallic thing is supposed to be a flare or something?? and that = the new quirk, smokescreen. well that was a fucking ride lmao we now return you to our regularly scheduled chapter
so now Deku is floating to his heart’s content and thinking that he’ll just sneak up on Muscular and vibe check his ass or whatever
WOOOOOOOO DANGER SENSE YESSSS I LOVE THIS FOR HIM
Tumblr media
okay guys, I'm gonna press pause here for a sec to make a serious note, because I am loving the shit out of this, but tbh I'm having trouble enjoying it as much as I want to because I keep getting anxious thinking about the discourse. I know that a lot of the fandom has very strong opinions on Deku's character development one way or the other, and I want to respect that. but I also really have no spoons to debate this topic at all beyond what I’ve already weighed in on. so if it’s all the same to everyone, I plan on staying out of this discussion, at least this week
anyway! that said, YEAH BOI GET HIS ASS
Tumblr media Tumblr media
VIBE: CHECKED. CURB: STOMPED. HOTEL: TRIVAGO
-- OF COURSE HE’S STILL FUCKING FINE LOL HE CRASHES INTO BUILDINGS FOR FUN IDK WHAT I WAS EXPECTING
Tumblr media
dammit Muscular. how many fucking quirks does it take to beat you?! the annoying thing is that even with all of his cool new powers, Deku is still something of a mismatch against him. anyway r.i.p. to all these poor buildings
OOOOOHHHHH
Tumblr media
you guys have no idea how intrigued I am at the prospect of watching Deku try to play both good cop and bad cop here lmao
anyway so Muscular says he doesn’t know, go figure
Tumblr media
“I’m not here to make small talk or anything” he says as he small talks about not small talking
OH MY GOD DEKU
Tumblr media
are you really gonna talk no jutsu all of these villains from now on?? that last battle really did have a profound impact on you, huh! interesting
you guys he’s really doing it omg
Tumblr media
Deku this guy tried to murder a five-year-old literally just for fun. I mean more power to you, but holy shit you’re really gonna try to defeat Muscular with anger management therapy huh
I MEAN
Tumblr media
WHO COULD HAVE SEEN THAT RESPONSE COMING dlkjslkjk
FUCK’S SAKE DEKU, I KNOW YOU MEAN WELL BUT THEY CAN’T ALL HAVE TRAGIC PASTS KIDDO
Tumblr media
but. I have to admit, I do still like that he tried. probably knew just as well as we did what the end result was going to be, but still. he made the effort in good faith and I respect that
uh oh
Tumblr media
why do I get the feeling Muscular just got a whole lot deader
oh my god oh my god he’s doing the “powering up” stance ffff don’t fucking tell me you can still use your fucking arms here, Deku
BUT MORE IMPORTANTLY WHAT’S THIS??
Tumblr media
okay so basically he’s saying that whatever it was he sensed in Tomura, he doesn’t sense from Muscular. which, yeah, that sounds exactly right. good judge of character here lol
AHHHHAHAHA YESS
Tumblr media
WHOOPS, GET FUCKED I GUESS
WOOOOHOOOOOOOO
Tumblr media
lmao so apparently this is the belated result of Shindou’s attack from chapter 307?? I’ll be damned. good for you Shindou!! I always liked you buddy. please just take my word on that and don’t fact check that statement
okay lol the one tiny bit of discourse I will allow is that it’s bullshit that he just did that with his right arm. like, I’ll fully acknowledge that. that makes no fucking sense, and I demand an explanation from the Great Plot Hole Filler himself. he’s never let us down before when it comes to continuity so I’m trusting him not to suddenly start now
that said, we love to see a rematch against a boring guy settled quickly and decisively within the span of a single chapter. THANK YOU
I like that Deku implies that his power is being a smart nerd who battles villains using the power of ANALYTICS. he basically didn’t do anything except restrain Muscular and wait for Shindou’s attack to take effect while halfheartedly checking to see if he regretted any of that murder and stuff
(ETA: and almost forgot to mention, he made excellent use of all four of his active SIXQUIRKS. it’s like the chapter title said; this is basically him fighting all-out, and it’s a sight to see.)
also, as cool as the mask was, this just feels right. like, we had our fun, now let us see his face, yes good
anyway, I think this was a good start towards establishing What’s Up With Deku Right Now! so if it’s all the same to Horikoshi, I would next like to take some time to explore Why’s Up With Deku. that, and What’s Up With Everyone Else, Especially Kacchan. por favor
462 notes · View notes
seita · 4 years
Text
— you love too easy | hitoshi shinsou (m.)
Tumblr media Tumblr media
pairing: hitoshi shinsou/f!reader
genre: angst, fluff, smut
wordcount: 𝟾𝟹𝟾𝟶
cw: childhood friends!au, roommate!au
tags: unrequited love, pining, toxic relationship (oc x shinsou), brief kaminari x reader, cunnilignus, dirty talk, pet names, praise kink, fingering, size kink, loss of virginity, light virgin kink, creampie, squirting, angst with a happy ending
note: sorry if u like kaminari. i made him a huge douchebag in this. i swear i like him i just needed a character to be,,,,well, a douchebag.
— all your life you'd been by his side. you've loved him since you could remember. you've always been by his side so why did he give his heart away to everyone but you; the one who would treat it right?
Tumblr media
⇦ back to navigation
Tumblr media
© all content belongs to seita 2020. do not modify or repost.  
Tumblr media
He fell in love too easily. You knew that your entire life. He’d give his heart away to anyone and everyone, fully and with everything he had. He loved with every fiber of his being. And it always ended in disaster. 
You couldn’t count how many nights you’d spent by his side rubbing his back as he cried because his girlfriend lied to him, comforting him as he hunched over a toilet after crying himself sick because his girlfriend cheated on him, or forcing him to eat because he got so depressed after she ignored him. 
It was an endless cycle. 
Yet you were always there to build him back up -- to pick up the pieces. 
Ever since the first girlfriend he had in Kindergarten that lasted for 2 days and ended in his tears up to the girl he dated in senior year of highschool who cheated on him with her ex...you were the one to fix him. 
Yes, Hitoshi Shinsou fell in love far too easily and way too hard.
The thought that kept you awake every night, however, was why couldn’t it be you? You were the one who took the best care of his heart -- being the one to piece it back together every time it was broken. He didn’t need to love anyone else. If he just loved you, he would never have to worry if he just gave his heart to you. 
But he never would. 
Because he didn’t love you like you loved him. 
You’d known him since you were babies -- your parents were friends in highschool and it went on well into adulthood. 
Naturally, the two of you grew close -- it was inevitable. Your crush on him developed in childhood -- you two got lost in the mall after you strayed away and he kept you safe and calm until you found your parents, his hand clasped tightly around yours as he let you cling to him. That was the first time you realized he made your cheeks feel warm and your tummy fluttery.
Your parents always joked that the two of you would fall in love and get married. It was nearly impossible for that idea not to be imprinted in your mind. 
Except, it was never an idea he entertained. 
Part of you felt foolish. You were a grown adult with a crush that you’d harbored since childhood -- pathetic, one-sided crush at that. 
The thing was, unlike Shinsou, you’d never dated before. It was never something you desired. Sure, you had confessions and love letters but you’d never once accepted them. You just couldn’t see yourself being with anyone but him.
Upon graduating, the two of you realized how terrible it was to be 18 trying to make it in the adult world. After a few years of fumbling and nearly getting kicked out by not making your rent payments on time, you decided that rooming together would be the best idea. 
It was a foolproof plan; you’d known each other for your whole lives so it wasn’t like you’d suddenly hate each other, you knew he was responsible with his money and you were too, and he was a quiet, chill guy so there wouldn’t be any obnoxious ruckus. 
What you didn’t think about, however, was him bringing girls home. 
“This is Aoi,” he introduced, motioning to the smiling girl beside him, “Aoi, this is _____...she’s my best friend.”
“And his roommate,” you added, holding your hand out politely.
“Oh you...live together?” you didn’t miss the distaste in her tone as she reached out to give you a weak handshake, pulling away as quickly as she could. She immediately wrapped her arms around his and he leaned how to press a kiss to the top of her head. 
Ouch. That made your heart hurt. 
Of course, it was nothing new. This was something you’d been through time and time again. 
What you hadn’t accounted for, was her dislike of you. Naturally, his past girlfriends hadn’t always been fond of you -- after all, you were a big part of their boyfriend’s life. And jealousy was a fickle disease. 
But Aoi’s dislike bordered on hatred and disgust over you. Every chance she got, she was pulling Shinsou away from you with some thinly veiled excuse. It seemed your best friend was none the wiser as well. 
You couldn’t blame him -- he was in love. Unfortunately. 
Aoi’s glares were ice cold, often sending shivers down your spine when she set it upon you. It was uncomfortable to say the least. She was at your place often enough for you to take up the art of avoiding her.
That is until one day when things seemed to come to a head for her. You weren’t sure what  you did but you found yourself cornered in the kitchen one evening while Shinsou was taking a shower -- leaving just the two of you alone. 
“Listen to me,” Aoi spat, arms crossed over her chest, making her look petulant, “You need to back off of Toshi.”
“Uhh...what?” you grunted, looking up from the glass of chocolate milk you were pouring.
“Stay away from him!” she spat.
“We literally live together,” you rolled your eyes, capping the pint of milk, “I can’t stay away from him.”
“You know what I mean,” she hissed, clearly pissed off by your sarcasm. She marched up to you, grabbing your upper arm in a vice grip, her acrylic nails pinching your skin, “I see the way you look at him. I know that look in your eye. You love him.”
Your mind blanked, mouth opening but failing to produce any words. She smirked smugly, stepping back and crossing her arms again.
“I…” your brows came together as you shook your head, finally putting the milk away.
“I knew it,” she huffed, “You can’t take him from me. Toshi is mine so you better remember that. You have no idea what I can do to you.”
With that parting threat, she stormed out of the kitchen back to Shinsou’s bedroom. You felt tears sting your eyes, feeling utterly humiliated by her. 
Another thing about Hitoshi Shinsou is he’s terribly dense sometimes. You had no idea how he managed to miss the horrifying tension between you and Aoi. But he somehow did. 
The three of you sat in the living room -- the two of them cuddled on the couch while you curled up under a throw blanket with your phone open to Twitter on the loveseat. They were watching some movie Aoi picked out that you knew Shinsou hated, but he watched it anyway. The thought made you bitter.
You’d never make him watch movies he hated. That’s just selfish. 
You let out a sigh, catching your best friend’s attention immediately.
“What is it, darlin’?” he asked, the usual pet name he used for you making your stomach flutter. Aoi’s eyes narrowed in distaste at it but he paid her no mind.
“Oh, I’ve just got a bit of a headache,” you mumbled, locking your phone to look over at him.
He frowned, concerned, pulling his arm from around his girlfriend’s shoulders. She whined at the loss, attempting to pull him back but he paid her no mind.
He disappeared from the living room to the kitchen. You could hear the refrigerator open before he began shuffling around the cabinets.
“You’re not slick,” Aoi hissed, keeping her voice low, “Why don’t you just go away. Don’t you think he’d prefer to be alone with his girlfriend? You’re just a third wheel.”
You didn’t get to reply before Shinsou returned, holding a glass of your chocolate milk and a couple pills. He smiled, handing everything to you before taking a seat with Aoi again. She immediately clung to him with a whine.
“Thank you Toshi,” you smiled, popping the pills in your mouth before taking a quick gulp of the milk. 
“Anytime, darlin’” he smiled, turning his attention back to the movie he hated. 
Part of you felt prideful that he was willing to pull himself away from his girlfriend to take care of you. She clearly saw you as competition and you couldn’t deny the giddy feeling it gave you when you proved to her that you meant something to Shinsou. 
You noticed very quickly when Shinsou stopped calling you by his nickname. It baffled you and you didn’t hesitate to bring it up to him.
“Ah, Aoi mentioned she doesn’t like it when I call other girls pet names,” he rubbed the back of his neck in that familiarly anxious way of him. He was avoiding your gaze, further ticking you off.
“I’m not other girls, Hitoshi,” he visibly cringed at hearing his full name, “I’m your best friend. You’ve always called me that.”
He sighed, biting his lip, clearly torn, “Sorry _____,” you frowned at the sound of your name. It seemed so foreign hearing it where he’d usually call you ‘darlin’’, “She is my girlfriend and it’d be shitty of me to neglect her wishes. I want this to work, you know?”
You rolled your eyes, arms crossing over your chest, “This is stupid Hitoshi.”
He sighed, clearly growing annoyed as well, “Look, you’re just my friend, alright? So back off.”
Your jaw fell open at those words, tears already starting to sting at your eyes, “Just your friend? That’s low, Hitoshi. I am not just your friend and you know it.”
He groaned, running a hand through his already messy hair, “You’re starting to sound jealous and clingy, _____. It’s not a good look.”
Feeling that the tears were going to spill any moment, you shook your head and stormed past him, “Screw you Shinsou.”
You slammed your bedroom door, missing the sight of him burying his face in his hands. Hearing you address him by his last name was even worse than hearing his first. 
Things remained tense between the two of you for a week. You had really been hurt by his words. You always thought you meant a lot to him -- that you’d never be the person who was pushed aside for a relationship. You never thought Shinsou would do that. 
As a result, you made no effort to even speak to him. Sometimes you’d pass him while he sat on the couch, Aoi snuggled up to him. Whenever you made eye contact with you, she held this smug, superior look that made you want to clock her. 
You’d never hated a girlfriend of his more.
Finally, Shinsou gave in. He couldn’t stand not having you to talk to. There was this heavy feeling lingering on his shoulders every time he thought about the cold way you called him by his last name. He never wanted to be addressed like that by you. 
There were a series of knocks on your door and you paused, debating on ignoring him. He knocked again when you took too long to answer.
“Come in,” you groaned, putting your laptop aside to give him your attention.
“Hey,” he smiled half-heartedly as he slipped into your room, closing the door behind him. 
“What do you want?” you asked, no bite in your voice.
He sighed, taking a seat beside you on the bed, “I want to apologize for what I said. I know that hurt your feelings so I’m sorry.”
You were quiet for a moment before you sat up straighter, “Hitoshi...I don’t want you to become a different person because of a girl.”
“What do you mean?” he frowned. 
You sighed, “I think she’s a bad influence on you, Toshi.”
He softened briefly at your use of his nickname but it was quickly replaced by a cold stare that sent shivers down your spine, “A-A bad influence? I’m not a kid, _____.”
You frowned, “You don’t have to be a kid to be negatively influenced by another person's toxicity, Hitoshi.”
“You think she’s toxic?” he scoffed, standing up, “You don’t even know her. You’ve barely even spoken to her.”
“Well the bit that I have spoken to her was not pleasant,” you spat, moving to sit at the edge of the bed with your feet on the floor, “I don’t think she’s good for you.”
“What are you, my mother now?” he growled, spinning around to glare at you, “Maybe I was wrong...maybe you are just jealous.”
“How am I acting jealous?” you cried, growing frustrated, “Caring about your wellbeing is jealousy now?”
“Oh get off it,” he groaned, “What’s she done then, huh? Tell me.”
You paused, remembering her threat. But you were so pissed off you couldn’t keep it in anymore, “She’s threatened me to stay away from you. She’s so insecure about our friendship she threatened me over it! Said you were hers and I better remember that. She’s crazy!”
“She didn’t say that,” he argued, eyes narrowed maliciously, “You’re just making shit up to make her look bad now. That’s really low, _____.”
“You asked me to tell you what she did and then you just don’t believe me?!” you screeched, tossing your hands up in exasperation.
“I thought you’d tell me the truth, not make up some pathetic lie!” he shouted, making you flinch. 
“Pathetic?” you breathed, shoulders sagging, “Is that what you think of me?”
He was quiet for a moment, jaw set. He seemed to be thinking his words carefully, which made his next even more painful, “Yeah. I do. This jealousy and lying of yours is pathetic. I get if you don’t like her but don’t make up shit about her,” he made way for the door, yanking it open, “Grow the fuck up, ______.”
You didn’t get a chance to reply before he was slamming your door shut. All at once, your emotions came crashing down and you buried your face in your pillow to silence your sobs. 
Your eyes fluttered open and you groaned, feeling your head pound. A glance out the window showed that it was nighttime. You had fallen asleep. 
You climbed out of bed to your desk to find your packet of headache pills. You let out a sigh of relief as you swallowed them down with the bottle of water sat on your nightstand. Flopping back into bed, you closed your eyes and attempted to relax your body. 
Just as it seemed that you were going to fall back asleep, there was a loud noise from past your door. You frowned, your eyes fluttering open in confusion. 
It came again and it took you a moment to realize what it was. A woman’s moan. 
“Toshi!” you heard her squeal, making you flinch.
“Are you fucking kidding me?” you hissed, feeling those tears come burning their way back. 
“That feel good, baby? Let me hear you,” he growled and your hands flew up to cover your ears to muffle the sounds of her pleasure. 
This was low for Shinsou. Sure, he’d had sex with girlfriends before but he always made sure to keep it down for your sake. Now he was just doing it to dig at you. 
He wasn’t wrong about your jealousy but you knew he thought you were jealous over his attention being taken away. But that wasn’t the case at all. It was because you were in love with him. 
Now he was forcing you to listen to him fuck the girlfriend you literally had a fight over. This wasn’t like Shinsou at all. 
She really was just a terrible influence on him but he was too in love to see it. She was making him into a different person and you hated it. It was happening so quickly. 
As you laid in bed, tears wetting your bed as you hid your head under your pillow, you couldn’t help but think.
The stupid fool really fell in love way too easily. 
Things went from bad to worse astonishingly fast. Aoi was over more often than she had been before. The snotty comments and humiliating words from her every time you saw her and the cold, deadly glare Shinsou set on you whenever you came anywhere near his girlfriend was wearing on you. 
You were unhappy. It was an emotion you rarely ever felt around him -- Shinsou was always the one to pick you up, not put you down. It got to the point where he wouldn’t even respond to your greetings or questions, giving you the complete silent treatment. 
It hurt. 
To escape the suffocating negativity of your apartment, you picked up even more shifts at work. The video game shop became a place you found solace in. 
If Shinsou noticed your absence, he didn’t make it known to you. 
“Will that be all for you today?” you asked, plastering on a fake, customer service smile onto your face.
“Yeah, I guess,” he mumbled, slapping down a few bills to cover the charge, “But I think I’d like to add your number to my receipt.”
You took a moment to look at him. He had blonde hair with a lightning bolt of black through it. He was dressed in black jeans, a t-shirt, and a leather jacket. He was cute, you’d give him that.
“Is that the best you could come up with?” you asked, opening the register with a brow raised.
He giggled, making you smile despite yourself, “I was on a time crunch I didn’t want to miss my chance.”
“Who said you had a chance to begin with?” you asked, passing him his change, “3.14 is your change.”
“Well, I was hoping you’d give one to me,” he shrugged, stuffing the change into  his pocket before grabbing the bagged video game he’d purchased. 
You gazed at him for a moment. He was charismatic and cute. He liked video games just like you. And he’d be a great distraction.
“Sure, why not?” you mused, watching his eyes go wide.
“Wait really?” he gasped, a grin stretching across his face.
“Did you think I’d say no?” you asked. 
“U-Usually I get rejected so…” he shrugged, scratching the back of his head with a cute blush reaching his ears, “Anyway, when’s your shift end?”
“Um...closing time, so about 8:30,” you replied, glancing at the clock. 5 hours left. 
“Sweet, I’ll pick you up!” he grinned.
“I-I’ll have to change though!” you complained, making him pause and shake his head.
“Don’t worry about it!” with those parting words, he bolted out the door, the bell chiming to signal his departure. 
As he disappeared from view, you realized you didn’t even know his name. 
You would come to find he was Denki Kaminari; a college student majoring in graphic design. He had a friend named Katsuki Bakugou who was as loud as he was angry. Eijirou Kirishima was a kind, chill guy who mellowed out the explosive Bakugou well. Mina and Sato, two friends-turned-lovers, were a common source of laughter for the group. 
You were together for a little over a month and a half when he finally asked to meet your friends. Truth be told, the only person you could consider a friend would be Shinsou. You had acquaintances and those you hung real casually with but Shinsou was the only person you’d consider a friend.
Well, you weren’t sure if he could even be called that anymore. 
Eventually, you gave in and decided to bring Kaminari to your apartment. 
“Whoa, nice place,” he mumbled, looking around. 
“You think so? Thanks,” you smiled, leading him towards the living room, “Like I said...things are...tense between me and Hitoshi so…”
“Who’re you?” a familiar voice came from the entry of the hallway. 
Shinsou stood there, messy hair and tired eyed wearing basketball shorts and an oversized t-shirt. His eyes burned holes into Kaminari, who visibly shrunk beneath the heated glare. You took note of how Shinsou didn’t even look at you. 
That still hurt.
“I’m Denki Kaminari,” the blonde replied, approaching Shinsou to shake his hand, “I’m _____’s boyfriend!”
You didn’t miss the shift in Shinsou’s look, his eyebrows perking up ever so slightly. His gaze finally shifted to you before he scoffed from his nose, making you wince. 
“Alright,” Shinsou mumbled, shoving his hands into his pockets before turning his back to the both of you, stalking back to his room with a slam of the door. 
Kaminari winced, “Boy, you weren’t kidding.”
“Yeah,” you sighed, motioning him to follow you, “Let’s head to my room. I don’t know if Aoi is here or not and I don’t care to find out.”
“I kinda wanna meet her too,” your boyfriend whispered, lowering his voice so it didn’t carry to Shinsou.
“No you don’t,” you chuckled, shutting your bedroom door once the two of you were safely inside. 
You sat beside him on the bed, reaching for your remote to click the TV on for background noise. He cuddled in beside you, commenting on how soft your bed was. 
“You smell really good,” he suddenly whispered, nosing at your neck. 
You blinked in surprise, moving your head so he could get a better angle, “Th-Thanks…”
He hummed as you shivered once he pressed a few soft kisses against your neck. It tickled a bit but also sent a strange tingle down your spine the more he kissed. Your heart hammered in your chest and you briefly wondered if Denki could hear it. 
He cupped your jaw, pulling you into a deep kiss. His tongue met your bottom lip, making you sigh against his lips. 
You barely noticed his hand crawling up your shirt until it snuck beneath the band of your bra. The unfamiliar feeling of someone cupping your breast had you pulled away, tugging on Kaminari’s hand to pull him away. 
“W-We shouldn’t…” you whispered, unsure of how to reject him, “W-With Shinsou the way he is…”
Kaminari looked skeptical for a second before nodding his head, “Got it.”
And that was that. 
At least you thought until he began trying more and more. It became common for you to find his hand up your shirt. The feeling made you uneasy, making you realize you really weren’t ready to have sex. Kaminari was your first boyfriend and you weren’t willing to give everything up to him like that.
“Why do you always stop me?” Kaminari asked one day, voice soft and reassuring.
“I just…” you cleared your throat, biting your lip, “I don’t want to go that far yet.”
He was quiet for a moment before smiling and nodding his head, pulling you closer to him with a kiss to your forehead. Your body relaxed, thankful that he wasn’t angry with you like you had feared he would be. 
He began following your wishes, no longer attempting to go past kissing. You were thankful. 
Unfortunately, your bliss didn’t last long because next thing you knew, he was dumping you. Over text. 
You had just got home from work, your feet aching and dread pooling in your stomach at the idea of being home. You were so tired of being scared to come home, it was exhausting. Shinsou was sitting on the couch, eating something he’d made himself for dinner with his back to you. He didn’t even show any signs that he knew you were home. 
Lingering by the door, you pulled your phone out to check your notifications. 
One from Denki made your heart stop -- the preview text already displaying what you feared. Your fingers were trembling as you unlocked your phone to look at the message. 
As you read it, the words grew blurrier until tears began to drip onto your screen -- further obscuring the words there. 
A small whimper escaped your throat, despite the way you tried to choke down any sounds. You quickly scurried to get to your bedroom when a strong hand snagged your wrist. Wide eyed, you were spun around to find Shinsou wearing a frown and furrowed brows. 
“Why are you crying?” he asked, voice stern with concern. 
You shook your head, feeling pathetic. You didn’t like Kaminari that much. Truthfully, you were mostly dating him to get away from Shinsou. But the idea that you were dumped because you wouldn’t have sex was utterly humiliating. Your first real boyfriend dumped you because you wouldn’t put out. 
“You were right,” you sniffled, unable to hold back the sob that tore through your chest, “I am pathetic.”
He didn’t have the chance to even think of a reply before you were escaping his hold to hide away in your bedroom. You haphazardly stripped and changed into your softest set of clothes, deciding you were going to wallow in your own self pity for the night. 
Your humiliation overshadowed the fact Shinsou had shown you the first sign of care in weeks. He had reacted to your crying just as he always had and instinctively moved to comfort you. 
You could hear muffled voices from the hallway, one male and one female. The fact he brought her over after you just had a near meltdown in front of him irked you and only brought more tears forth. 
A sense of anger rushed over you -- you didn’t want her there. This was your house and you didn’t want her there while you were going through it. You had half a mind to go out there and kick her out, maybe Shinsou would let it slide since you were clearly having a tough time. 
What you didn’t expect were the shouts coming from them. You frowned and walked towards your door, cracking it open to listen to their shouting from the living room.
“You’re kicking me out?!” Aoi cried. 
“I’m not kicking you out,” Shinsou sighed, “You don’t live here. I’m just asking you to go home for the night, Aoi.”
“Why should I?” Aoi argued, “Because she’s upset? Who cares!”
“I care!” Shinsou snapped.
Aoi scoffed, “Oh yeah, since when? Last I checked you picked me over her!”
“I didn’t pick anyone over anyone,” Shinsou huffed.
“Really?” Aoi’s tone was dripping in sarcasm, “You haven’t paid her a second of attention since your little fight. I doubt you even noticed how she’s been working full-time instead of part-time. Why do you think that is? To get away from you! Not that I give a shit, but you have been treating her like dirt. So don’t even try and pretend you give a shit, I know you don’t. You only feel bad because she’s crying. Once she gets over it you’ll just come back to me in the end. So just let her sulk by herself, she’s a big girl.”
Shinsou was quiet after that. You were sure he wasn’t even going to respond but you continued to stand there and listen. The apartment was silent, you could even hear the ticking of the decorative clock Shinsou’s mother had given you both. 
“She was right, huh?” he finally whispered.
“Huh?” Aoi replied, clearly annoyed.
“I really did let you turn me into someone else,” he sighed, “God, I’m so stupid.”
“What the hell are you talking about, Hitoshi?” she snapped, growing impatient over the argument. 
“You should leave,” Shinsou said, voice strong once again, “You and I are done.”
“What?!” Aoi shrieked, stomping her foot, “You can’t dump me! Not for her!”
“Get out, Aoi,” Shinsou growled, yanking the front door open.
She scoffed, “Don’t come crawling back to me when you learn she isn’t worth it.”
The slam of the door signalled the end. Silence ensued and you slipped back into your room, letting your door shut silently. 
Just as you expected, there were a few soft knocks on your door. You didn’t reply but he opened up anyway, peeking in to find you sitting on the bed with your head hung.
“I assume you heard all that,” he said, cupping the back of his neck nervously. 
“Yeah, kind of hard to miss,” you mumbled, feeling awkward about sharing this moment with him.
You didn’t look up when he sat down beside you. With a sudden tug, you found yourself wrapped up in a sweet embrace. 
“Why were you crying? Did something happen with that Kaminari dude? Did he hurt you?” his concern brought forth a new flood of tears that you let go. 
“He dumped me,” you whined, clinging to the front of his shirt.
“Why?” he asked, petting your hair softly.
You scoffed, shame building up inside you, “Because I didn’t want to have sex with him.”
Immediately he pushed you back by your shoulders to look at your face, “He dumped you ‘cause you wouldn’t fuck him?”
“Yeah,” you mumbled, avoiding his gaze, “He said he had needs and he wasn’t willing to wait for me to put out.”
“Jesus,” Shinsou scoffed, shaking his head, “What a prick,” he pulled you into his chest again with a sigh, “It’s good you didn’t sleep with him then. He wouldn’t have been worth it.”
“Yeah, I would have regretted it,” you nodded, “I’m not even sad he broke up with me. I just feel like shit that it was over sex. He was my first boyfriend and I got dumped because I wasn’t ready...that sort of feels shitty, you know?”
Shinsou nodded, resting his cheek atop your head, “I understand. It’s like a blow to your self-esteem, yeah?”
“Exactly,” you sniffled, your tears finally coming to a stop as he held you and let you talk, “I didn’t like him enough to sleep with him anyway. Even if I was ready.”
Shinsou chuckled, “Well, I’m glad you’re not heartbroken over it.”
You were quiet for a long moment before you pulled away from him, “How are you? I know you liked Aoi.”
Shinsou frowned, looking at his hands in his lap before shrugging, “I actually don’t really feel anything.”
“Really?” you asked, surprised. Usually he would be in tears by now. But he was right, there wasn’t even an ounce of sadness in his eyes.
He nodded, “All I really cared about was you. I guess realizing what she really was wiped out anything I felt for her. Truthfully, it was probably going to be over soon anyway.”
“Why do you say that?” you asked.
“We just didn’t have good chemistry, I suppose. The sex was great but beyond that we didn’t really share any common interests,” he explained, leaning back on his hands with a sigh.
You cringed at the mention of sex -- remembering the night you sobbed as you were forced to listen to them go at it. Shinsou seemed to notice your discomfort, leaning up straight once more to take your hands in his. 
“I’m sorry, ______,” he breathed, making you look up at him, “I was such a fuckin’ asshole to you. You didn’t deserve that and if you chose to never forgive me I would understand. But I promise I will never let a girl come first again. You’re my best friend, you’re the entire world to me and you will always be here when all the girls leave, I know that. No one can ever replace you.”
His words caused a flood of tears to flood down your cheeks again. You threw your arms around his shoulders, tugging him into a desperate hug. He wrapped his arms around your waist, fisting the back of your shirt with his face buried in your neck. 
“I will always be here, Toshi,” you hiccuped, “I really will. It doesn’t matter if you choose the next 50 girls over me, I would never let you go. I would rather live with you ignoring me and making me cry over not having you at all.”
He sighed, tears of his own falling from his eyes and wetting your skin but you didn’t mind, “I would never ask that of you.”
“You don’t have to,” you whispered, voice trembling. You couldn’t stop the next words from coming, you didn’t even try, “That’s how strong my love is for you, Toshi. I would do anything for your happiness. I’ll let you cry on my shoulder when girl after girl breaks your heart, even though it hurts so damn much because I know I would never, ever let you down like that. I’ll sit with you in the living room while another girl is wrapped in your arms, desperately wishing it was me, because you want me and her to be friends. You don’t even know it but you have every bit of me,” your voice broke as you let out a sob, taking a stuttering breath before continuing, “I never dated because I only ever loved you. You’re the only one I ever want to love. I don’t even care if you don’t feel the same, Toshi, I just needed you to know...I have loved you since we were kids. Whenever your mom joked that we would get married, I used to go to sleep hoping it would come true one day. You’re it for me, you know?”
Shinsou was still, every muscle in his body tense against you. You remained relaxed, relishing in being held in his arms even though it very well may be the last time you would ever experience it. His tears had stopped and you could feel his hands trembling against your back from where he was still holding your shirt in tight fists. 
Finally, slowly, he pulled away. You avoided his gaze, scared of what you may find there. With trembling fingers, he lifted your chin until you were finally forced to meet his gaze.
“______…” he whispered, your voice like honey on his lips, “Is that true? Since we were kids?”
You chuckled through your still falling tears, “Remember that time at the summer festival when I wandered off and you had to chase me? And I got scared because I couldn’t find our parents? When you let me hold onto you and you kept reassuring me that everything was okay…” you shrugged, your voice cracking as you uttered, “I knew I loved you then. And I love you to this day.”
His wide eyes were glassy as he stared at you, mouth agape in his shock. It was so much for him to take in. 
Before you knew what was happening, he was leaning in and pressing his lips against yours. Your vision went white for a second in shock at the feeling. 
His lips were soft and as you began to kiss back, you tasted coffee on his lips. Typical of Shinsou, it was late at night and he was still drinking coffee. The thought made you smile and you wrapped your arms around his neck to deepen the kiss. He cupped the back of your head, a soft sigh escaping him as he moved his lips expertly until you were breathless.
After a long moment, he pulled away. The both of you were panting, eyes lidded as you processed what just happened.
“Toshi…” you whispered, feeling euphoric after kissing him, “I don’t understand.”
He shook his head, cupping your cheek, “All you need to know...is that I love you too.”
You gaped at those words coming from his lips. Surging forward, you pressed your lips against his again. He smiled into the kiss, leaning further against you until you were forced to lay back against the mattress. His body was hovering above yours, held up by his elbows on either side of your head.
He wasted no time in touching your body, years of desperation finally culminating into this one moment. His hand slid beneath your shirt, pushing the hem up to expose the soft skin of your belly.  He paused at your ribs, unsure if you were okay with him going any further. But when you gripped his wrist and urged his hand up to cup your breast, he threw away those inhibitions. 
Thumbing your sensitive nipple, you keened as they hardened beneath his touch. He leaned down a bit more to press his lips against yours. 
You lost yourself against his lips, whimpering and grinding against nothing. Just the fact the man you’d loved for so long was there touching you after years of craving it had your panties soaked. 
“You’re so pretty,” he whispered, breaking from the kiss to kiss down your body. 
You trembled beneath him, watching him with rapt attention as he kissed the exposed skin of your stomach and ribs. Sighing, you let him push your shirt over your head to discard off the side of the bed. He leaned forward, enveloping one of the pert buds in his hot mouth, tonguing at it until you were whining and begging him to give attention to the other one. He did so eagerly, providing a stimulating suck before finally pulling away. His lips were swollen and his cheeks were flushed, the very fact you made him that way was dizzying. 
“Wanna taste that perfect cunt too, baby,” he growled, voice losing the soft, sweetness it once held. 
“O-Okay,” you agreed easily, raising your hips so he could tug the last remaining articles off of your body. 
The second you were bare, his hands were pinning your thighs open. His eyes examined every inch of your pussy -- taking in the juices dripping from your clenching hole. 
“You’re so fucking wet,” he groaned, using his thumbs to spread your folds apart, “so pretty too, god. Look at you...you’re perfect. Bet you’re so sweet…”
“Please Toshi…” you whimper, reaching down to tangle your fingers into his hair.
His eyes fluttered at the feeling, allowing you to pull him to your pussy where he eagerly ran his tongue flat between your spread folds. You gasped, eyes slamming shut as he paused to wrap his lips around your clit for just a split second. The teasing touch was addictive and you suddenly wanted more. 
Shinsou understood what it is you wanted and quickly dove back in for more. Circling his tongue around your clit, your back arched. You wanted to close your thighs against the stimulation but his strong hands kept your legs pinned open. 
He swirled his tongue quickly, moaning before enveloping the bud in his hot mouth. You tugged his hair, crying out his name as you felt a high approaching rapidly. He looked so good between your thighs, eating your cunt like you’d dreamed of for ages. 
Suddenly, he pulled away, licking his lips before sitting up.
“Fuck, tell me babygirl,” he breathed, “You gonna let me fuck this pretty cunt?” you nodded, reaching to push his shit up but he stopped you, looking you in the eyes, “Use your words. Tell me.”
“Yes, please fuck me Shinsou!” you begged.
He grinned, pressing a kiss against your lips before stripping himself of his clothes. 
You almost gasped at the sight of his cock. He was big; long and thick. Subconsciously, you clenched your thighs together in anticipation. 
“You ready?” he asked, scooting to sit between your spread legs. 
You tensed up as he prodded your entrance with the fat head of his cock. He realized how tense you were and ran his hand along your thigh to soothe you, “You good? You can back out anytime, darlin’.”
You swallowed thickly, feeling your cheeks heat up as you looked at him through your lashes, “I-It’s just...go slow?”
He frowned, brows drawn together before he backed away from you a bit, “Is this your first time, sweetheart?”
Licking your lips, you hesitated before nodding. Shinsou sighed, hanging his head to rest against your collarbone. You frowned, “I-Is that bad?” you asked. 
Truth was, you never wanted anyone but him. You never had a desire to have sex with anyone but him. You knew he was the one person you’d never regret being with. 
“No!” he sat up, eyes wide before wrapping his hand around the nape of his neck nervously, “I just wish you would have told me sooner...that was almost bad.”
“Why?” you asked,making him chuckle. He shook his head and pressed a kiss to your forehead.
“Well…” clearing his throat, he looked off to the side bashfully, “My dick’s not exactly the smallest around and since you’re a virgin you could do with...a lot more preparation, you know?”
Your cheeks were ablaze from the bluntness of his words. He didn’t waste another second in bringing his hand to your still wet pussy. 
He sighed, a smile lingering on his lips as he worked his middle finger into your tight hole. Humming, he bit his lip as he slipped his ring finger alongside it. You sighed, eyes fluttering at the mild stretch that came along with it. 
“Feel okay?” he asked softly, working the two fingers in and out of your hole. 
You nodded, “Feels good,” you breathed. 
Your eyes fell closed as he crooked his fingers upwards to touch that sweet spot on top. Your hips jumped at the sensation, ripping a moan from your swollen lips. He smirked, burying the digits deep, licking his lips at the way your juices gushed out from around them. 
With his other hand, he found your clit, circling the bud with his thumb as he worked his index finger into the mix. The added stimulation to your clit made your wall clench tightly and he grunted, imagining what it would feel like around his cock. 
“Please Toshi,” you begged, “I want you already.”
“Thank you’re ready?” he asked, although he already knew the answer. 
And he was right when you whimpered out a pathetic little, “Yes!”
He resumed the position from earlier, his tip pressed against your entrance. It was opened a bit from his three fingers but he knew it was still going to be a tight fit. 
He took your hand in his, lacing your fingers together as he began to sink into your cunt. You whimpered as your walls stretched around him, squeezing his hand. He bottomed out quickly, stilling to let you adjust to being stuffed so full of his thick cock. 
“Does it hurt?” he asked, pressing a kiss to your lips. 
“N-No…” you mumbled, “Just...feels weird.”
He chuckled, kissing your lips again. He could feel you squeezing around him, your cunt unused to having such a big cock inside. The fact he was your first, the one taking your virginity -- tainting your pure body was turning him on more than he ever thought it would. 
He couldn’t even lie and say he’d never taken a cherry before but with you it was different. He felt a sense of pride and possessiveness wash over him; you were his completely. You had given him your heart and your body. 
Burying his face in your neck, he pressed kisses against the sweet spot he easily found there. Grinding his hips against yours, he stirred your insides with his thick length until you were arching your hips to get more of the addictive pleasure only he could bring you. 
He pulled out halfway, slowly sinking his cock back inside with a groan.
“That’s a good girl,” he praised, eyes glued to where your cunt was stretched around him, “Taking me so well, look at that.”
“Feels so good,” you whimpered, clutching the sheets beneath you in your fists.
“Yeah?” he grinned, pulling out so the tip remained only to surge forward and sink his cock into you in one long thrust. Immediately, your back arched and you let out an erotic moan that had his cock throbbing against your walls, “Fuck, my cocks almost too much for you but you’re bein’ such a good girl for me, aren’t you? Taking what I give you...fuck…”
His praise and dirty words went straight to your core. He set a steady pace, making sure to angle his hips up so he could hit your g-spot. The pleasure had your eyes rolling back and you cried out his name every so often, making his heart race. 
“Sound so pretty sayin’ my name…” he groaned, cupping your breasts in his hands as he fucked you, “Pussy’s so tight and wet...I can feel you dripping, you know that? Who would have thought such a pretty cunt could get so messy. But you only get this messy for me, right darlin’?”
“Only you!” you babbled, wrapping your arms around his neck to press your lips against his. He moaned into your mouth, reaching between your bodies to circle your clit, “Fuck! Toshi, y-you’re gonna make me cum!”
“Fuck,” he groaned, “Do it then, sweetheart. Go on, cum on my fucking cock.”
A few more thrusts and circles over your swollen bud had you falling over the edge. Your body trembled and arched beneath him, cunt spasming around him as he worked you dutifully through your orgasm. 
Once you came down, he pulled his hand from your clit and pulled out. You were panting, body limp and relaxed as you let him move you onto your hands and knees. Keeping your face buried in the pillow, you allowed him to maneuver you into the proper position. 
He pressed his hand down on the small of your back, “Arch your back for me, good girl.”
“Th-This is embarrassing, Toshi…” you whispered into the pillow. 
He hummed, gripping his cock to direct himself back into the sweet vice of your cunt, “No reason to be embarrassed, kitten. It’s just me...you can trust me.”
“I-I know...but still…” you whimpered, eyes fluttering as he sunk his cock deep inside. The position allowed him to reach a new depth. 
“Do you want to stop?” he asked softly, running his hand along your spin. 
You hesitated for a second, focusing on the pleasurable sensation of being filled so completely before shaking your head. He grinned, leaning down to kiss your shoulder blade, “Good girl.”
The praise went to your head and you suddenly had a desire to receive more. You wanted to be good for him -- be his good girl. 
You lifted your head from the pillow and cried out his name, fucking yourself back against his cock. He grinned, slapping your ass lighter than he usually would do it -- he wasn’t sure how you would take to it. When he felt you clench around him in response, he grinned. That was something worth looking into it seemed. 
“Toshi…” you whined, reaching back to grip at his hip.
He hummed, slowing ever so slightly, “What is it, kitten?”
“Please…” you whined, feeling your cheeks flush with embarrassment over what you desperately wanted to ask him.
“Please what?” he whispered, kissing your shoulder blade again, “Tell me what you need, baby.”
“C-Call me...y-your goog girl again…” you whispered, immediately burying your face in your pillow. 
He paused, eyes wide before another grin grew across his face. Wrapping his arm around your waist, he pulled you up until your back was pressed against his chest. You cried out, his cock stilling inside you as he pressed his lips against your ear.
“You like being praised huh?” he asked, chuckling when you nodded, leaning your head back to rest on his shoulder. He enjoyed the fucked out look on your face, “Like being my good girl, hm? Such a pretty, sweet girl for me…”
You whimpered, walls clenching around his still cock, “I-I love you Toshi…”
He hummed, reaching down to find your clit. Circling over the bud, you keened, eyes fluttering as your cunt clenched tight around him, “I know you do, sweetheart.”
Suddenly, your walls squeezed, clamping down tight. He groaned, cursing under his breath as he felt your body seize up in your orgasm, trembling and gushing around his cock. He pressed his lips against your shoulder, looking down to where his length was buried completely inside. 
You began to rock yourself along his cock, your orgasm flying to new heights as he never stopped playing with your sensitive bud. 
Suddenly, he watched with wide eyes as your cum squirted out, soaking the bed and your thighs. 
“Shit,” he growled, providing a few quick slaps against your clit, making you squirt just a few more times, “What a good fucking girl you are. Look at the mess you made. You’re so perfect, I love you so much.”
Those words had you clenching once again. That finally sent him over the edge himself. He rocked into you, holding you tight against him. His cock throbbed, spitting hot cum into your sensitive cunt. 
He cupped your breasts, groaning in the throes of his orgasm as he pressed kisses against your shoulder, neck, and cheek. 
When he finally came down, he gently laid you on the bed, pulling his cock out. His cum gushed from your hole without his length to stop it. You cringed, the feeling unpleasant to say the least. 
He got out of bed to go to the bathroom intending to get a cloth to clean you with. 
When he was gone, you found yourself thinking about what just happened. One particular thought was on your mind and when he returned, you didn’t hesitate to voice it.
“W-We didn’t use a condom…” you mumbled. 
He hummed, “Were we supposed to? I thought you were on birth control.”
“I am...it’s just…” you frowned, clearing your throat as you watched him wiped your thighs and sensitive folds free of your mixed cum.
“What?” he sat beside you, fixing you with a steady gaze, urging you to confess your thoughts to him. 
“You were just...dating, you know...Aoi and…” you sighed, averting your gaze from him, “Other girls before.”
He chuckled, laying beside you, “What, you’re concerned I have something?”
“Well no...not necessarily…” you frowned as he cupped your cheek, making you look at him.
“If you must know…” he shrugged before continuing, “I always used a condom with them.”
“Really?” he nodded at your question, “Then...why with me?”
“Because you’re you,” he smiled, kissing your lips, pulling you to lay against his chest, “You’re the one for me, kitten. That’s all you need to worry about.”
Yes, Hitoshi Shinsou fell in love easily. But he never gave those girls his heart. He cried because he thought he could never have you. The truth was, you had always owned his heart. It had always been in your hands. 
Tumblr media
4K notes · View notes