#like I feel like it hits too close and I don’t feel safe posting things

[starkidmunson]

glitter & crimson

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7

It’s both exciting and terrifying to be in Chicago when they arrive Thursday afternoon. This is, unfortunately, very often as close to hometown shows as the band gets to these days. They have the night off, before the show tomorrow, when the band will find out if Steve and his friends actually show up to the gig or not. Despite not having a show, the band doesn’t get the whole day off; Paige had booked a few radio interviews before the gig to drum up attention.

He should have seen it coming when the radio host brought up the TikTok exchange. “So, be honest, have you guys coordinated with Harrington and his friends to get him to your show tomorrow?” 

“Not really. Our manager sent info and Steve gave it a thumbs up, but that’s really been it? But we’ve been busy with shows almost every night, and he’s had a lot of travel games the last few days, so we’ll have to wait and see if he’s able to make it out.” Jeff takes over the answer with ease, probably having predicted the attention.

“Did you really not recognize him, Eddie?” The host goads and Eddie lets himself chuckle.

“It may sound kind of ridiculous, but the genuine answer is yeah. I haven’t seen him in, like, 6 years. And, believe it or not, we didn’t exactly run in the same crowds. We knew of one another, I think, but there were hundreds of kids in our school.” Eddie always defaults to the truth in interviews; it’s the simplest route and leaves less room for people to poke holes in the narrative if he’s just honest.

“Will you guys be going to the Blackhawks game on Saturday?”

“We’ll just have to wait and see, man,” Gareth laughs, and just as quickly as the segment started, it’s over with their own latest hit playing them out of the studio.

A Thursday night off in the city wasn’t the most exciting thing in the world, but the band collectively made a trip to the bar closest to their hotel for wings and a few drinks. One of the guys must have posted something on social media about being out because as Eddie’s walking into his hotel, he happens to check his TikTok to find a message waiting for him.

harrington94 should I take it personally that you guys went out in my town and didn’t ask for recs or anything? 

eddiecc I honestly figured you’d be too busy and didn’t want to bother you.

harrington94 never too busy to show a friend around town. But I do appreciate having a down day, so thanks. 

Eddie wasn’t entirely sure how to answer as he processed Steve’s message. Friends? Is that what they were? Could they even really consider one another that? He ultimately decided not to think too much of it, in favor of keeping the conversation going. Maybe the more they talked, the less awkward the next two nights would be.

eddiecc I totally get it if you want to skip the show in favor of another down day.

harrington94 no backing out on me now, Munson. I’ve finally got the cool card with the Party. We’ll be there, no doubt.

Eddie feels a little smile creep over his face and his ears feel a little warm, but before he can answer that, text bubbles pop up again. He waits to see what else Steve is going to say before he does something embarrassing.

harrington94 now feels like a safe time to confess that I haven’t really listened to much of your music, though, so don’t think I’m rude if I’m not headbanging along with the boys.

That was more like the interaction Eddie had expected from their TikTok exchange. He never expected Steve to know their music and was shocked he even knew their band name when his response had been posted on TikTok.

eddiecc I honestly cannot exactly say I’m surprised to hear this. You never exactly struck me as a headbanger, anyway.

harrington94 i feel like that’s some kind of thinly veiled insult that I’m missing, but you’re not wrong.

The text bubbles appear again, and Eddie waits for him to finish the thought rather than respond.

harrington94 why don’t you text me instead? It feels easier than paying attention to this app I don’t really know how to use.

Eddie was quick to copy the number Steve sent and shoot off a text, weirdly enjoying the exchange the two were having and not ready to call it a night just yet.

__________

A particularly ridiculous meme from Eddie had Steve snorting from his spot lounging across the sofa. The next thing he knew, a pillow was flying at his face. He was able to react quickly enough to block it with his arm, dropping the phone to his chest, before glaring at Robin. She was watching him from the recliner across the living room.

“What the fuck?” He asks, tossing the pillow back in her general direction, more gently than she’d tossed it his way.

“You’re grinning at your phone like you’re setting up a hot date. Please don’t tell me you’re talking to Heidi again.” Robin pleads dramatically, twisting her body in the chair to face him. 

“I’m not grinning at my phone, shut up.” He grumbles, ignoring how hot his neck feels as he blushes. Instead, he picks his phone back up to finish the thought he’d been typing before he’d been interrupted. “I’m just texting with Eddie, that’s all.”

Robin’s eyes widened immediately, and she sprung from the recliner toward the sofa. “Give me your phone!” She demands, grunting as she fell face first into the sofa, missing Steve by an inch. He manuveres away from her without looking up from his phone, making his way down the hall to his room. “Steve, come on!”

“It’s not a big deal! We’re just talking! It’s fine!” He insists, tucking the phone into his back pocket as he turns into his bedroom.

But maybe it was a big deal? Steve couldn’t tell; this was the part he was never really good at. He had a tendency to miss signs everyone else thought were obvious, and he didn’t want to risk making things weird with Eddie if Robin thought he was missing something that wasn’t actually there. The texts with Eddie had shifted from Steve confessing his knowledge of Corroded Coffin was strictly limited to whatever the Party played in the car when he drove them places, to Eddie confessing he knew next to nothing about hockey. It seemed to level the playing field between the two of them, and at least made Steve feel more at ease about the time they’d be spending together between the concert and the game. 

When Steve had asked how the tour was going so far, Eddie had shared a link to an instagram, where fans were finding something to meme from each night of the shows. To which Jeff and Gareth were making memes in response, picking on one another in a way that felt like with some of his teammates. The message that had prompted the most reaction from Steve was the last thing Eddie had sent before Robin threw the pillow; a meme of Eddie looking confused, which Jeff had edited “So he’s not Joe Jonas?” over his head.

In his room, Steve leans over to pick up his charger, but he feels his phone lift free from his pocket. “Hey!” He calls after Robin, who’s sprinting down the hallway, laughing like the menace she is.

“I just want to see what you’re talking about!” Robin says, unlocking his phone. He’s just about to catch up to her, as she slides on her socks into her bedroom, closing the door behind her, right in his face. 

“You’re being a child, Robs, c’mon. Give me my phone back.” He sighs, resting his forehead against the door. He jiggles the handle, but as he’d guessed, she’d locked it behind her.

“Do you like him?” She asks through the door, and he sighs again.

“I don’t know,” He answers, honestly and exhaustedly. “I don’t even know him, you know? We weren’t friends, it’s not like I could tell you anything about him other than Tommy used to buy weed from him and he would stand on tables and yell in the cafeteria.”

There’s a long silence before Robin opens the door, meeting Steve with a little smile. She shoves the phone back into his chest and pats his hand when he takes it from her. “I think this could be good for you. That this could be good for you.”

“I’m trying not to read too hard into it.” Steve mumbles, reaching up to run his fingers through his hair nervously. He glances back down at the screen, to see what while Robin had taken the phone, Eddie had sent another text.

Eddie: How were your games? Are you doing anything special for your day off?

It makes something twist in his chest, that Eddie even cares, and he doesn’t quite know why. It must show on his face, some part of how he’s feeling, because Robin just smiles and nods. Maybe she knows how he feels, part of their weird unspoken telepathy, because she walks further into her room and pats the edge of her bed as she goes.

“Are you going to let me paint your nails for the concert?” She asks. Everything inside of Steve appreciates how she always knows when to give him space to try and figure his shit out on his own.

“Obviously.” He laughs softly, following her into the bedroom to sit on her bed and watch her move around collecting things to paint his nails.

~~~

The following day, Steve spends more time than he would like to admit picking out an outfit to wear to the concert. He can hear the Party starting to get antsy in the living room, even though they’d still be plenty early if they left right now, so he decides to just roll with the white shirt and fitted khakis he’d dressed himself in several hours ago before he started overthinking his choices. He finished the outfit off with a black zip-up fleece and black and white Nikes. 

A final check of his hair had him walking out of his room and into the living room, where chaos erupted.

“It’s about time!” Dustin exclaims, practically bouncing up and down with excitement on the sofa.

“It took you that long to come out looking like that?” Mike asks, but Max just snorts and shoves his shoulder.

“Let’s just go.” Steve rolls his eyes, glancing over at Robin who jingles car keys she’s already holding, before leading the way out of the apartment.

In the car, he shoots Eddie a quick text to let him know they’re on the way. Eddie’s quick to reply, giving the message a thumbs-up reaction. Unbelievably, the Party somehow manages to get even louder than usual once they were inside, and it doesn’t take long for a security guard to find them. They’re led through the back tunnels of Wintrust Arena, and Steve gets a little nostalgic for playing hockey in college. He’s snapped out of it when a girl passes out their pass lanyards and gives each of the Party a voucher for free drinks and snacks. 

“This is too much, really,” Steve protests as she hands him the voucher, but Paige insists with a kind smile. 

“We get this kind of stuff from every venue and rarely get to use it to its full extent. The guys want to do this for you and your friends, just enjoy it.”

The Party loads up on treats at the nearest food station, while Steve and Robin grab beers with Paige. As she collects her drink, Paige hands Steve a palm-sized bag of earplugs. He frowns at them, which makes her laugh. 

“Eddie said this isn't really your usual kind of scene, and these shows can get loud,” she taps her own ears to show she has similar earplugs in. “Should also help prevent headaches or anything else that might keep you off the ice tomorrow.”

“Please, he’s too stubborn to stay off the ice. The amount of migraines he’s played through is outrageous,” Dustin bounds back into the conversation, earning a chuckle from Robin. Steve throws his arm around the younger boy’s shoulders, pulling him just a little too close and too tight. Dustin exaggerates choking noises, flailing around and making a scene, but Steve refuses to let up.

_____

There’s more anxiety than usual thrumming through Eddie as he and Jeff make their way through the arena, to where Paige had said she’d take Steve and his friends for snacks. As they walk up on the group, however, Steve quickly pulls a younger boy with a head full of curls into a headlock. He lets the scene continue for a moment before he nudges Jeff.

“At what point fo you think we should intervene?” He asks with a smile, making Jeff chuckle. Steve, however, freezes, then shoves Dustin away. He turns to give Eddie a sheepish smile, and Eddie can’t help but raise an eyebrow. 

Steve lets out a huff of a laugh, running his fingers through his hair, shrugging and tipping his head in the boy’s direction. “This is Dustin. He’s like my little brother. I’m allowed to pick on him when he’s being a shithead.” Dustin nudges his elbow into Steve’s gut, who’s quick to smack his arm in response. Before Eddie can stop himself, he’s twisting a curl around his finger and biting back a grin. He does, however, make a conscious effort to not chew on his hair. He knows he’d never hear the end of it, fawning over Steve Harrington after a whole 10 seconds.

Eddie offers a hand out to Dustin, hoping Jeff and Paige would let his little tells fly under the radar. Just this once, they seem to, as he greets the Party. “Hey man, I’m Eddie. Nice to meet you.”

“I know who you are, holy shit, man.” Dustin eventually fumbles through, shaking Eddie’s hand and grinning up at him. 

Steve rattles off the introductions for each kid, like a proud mom, and Eddie greets each of them politely, but his eyes keep falling back on Steve. He catches his little smiles and the way he nudges different members of the Party, squeezes their shoulders, ruffles their hair. It’s gentle and sweet and it sends a warm feeling through Eddie’s chest. His smile softens as he watches their interactions. All too soon, Freak leans into the area they’ve gathered in and whistles.

“Shit, guys, we gotta go.” Jeff sighs, and Eddie pats his shoulder before he turns back to the group with a grin. 

“Just hang with Paige and try not to get into too much trouble, we’ll get drinks after?” Eddie asks, looking at Steve, who smiles back and gives a little nod.

As Eddie runs to catch up with Jeff and Freak, he wonders exactly what he’s gotten himself into here.

____

It’s more fun than Steve expects, the concert. The excitement of watching the show from the suite quickly bores the Party, as they realize it’s the same as watching hockey games from a guest box. They eat their snacks and drink some through the openers, but during the break before Corroded Coffin, Lucas and Dustin drag Steve around to the side stage. Robin promises to stay with the others, and reminds Steve to wear the earplugs. 

He’s grateful Paige had slipped them to him as they get beside the stage and he realizes just how loud the crowd is when the lights go down. From where they’re standing sidestage, he can see Eddie, Jeff, Gareth and Freak in a little huddle. They bounce around with their arms around each others backs, before yelling something Steve can’t quite make out. They’re handed their instruments by the crew. As they’re taking the stage, Eddie walks up in their direction and pokes his tongue out at them, before ripping into a guitar riff to make his entrance. 

Despite himself, Steve finds his head bobbing along to the drum beat, and even sings along to the songs he recognizes. It’s hard to take his eyes off Eddie through the whole production. He’s a little ball of energy, bounding around from one end of the stage to the other, bantering with the other guys in the band and drawing the fans into his chaos during talking breaks. During a drum solo, Eddie climbs onto the front of the kit and holds his guitar up in the air over his head. Steve watches, mesmerized, as Eddie holds his gaze for a moment that feels like an eternity but is probably only a few seconds. Eddie winks at Steve, then, before he leaps back into yet another riff. It shouldn’t have had so much of an impact, but Steve finds it kind of takes his breath away.

It’s over before long, and Paige is quick to guide Steve and the boys back to the club box. He smiles as they walk behind Dustin and Lucas, gushing over how great the show was. Back in the box, Steve and Paige agree to meet across the street at Fatpour. He charms his way into using the upstairs as a private room with a signature to the manager and flashes a smile and wave to the few people downstairs who seem to have recognized him. 

The band makes a loud entrance as the Party works their way through appetizers, and Eddie is quick to find his way to Steve. “You seemed to have enjoyed yourself, was it more fun than you expected?” He asks around a grin.

“I never said I wasn’t going to have a good time,” Steve defended through a smile, making Eddie laugh and Steve thinks that might be the best sound he’d heard all night, despite having just seen the concert. Eddie glances around then, locking eyes with a bartender to get their attention.

“What’s your poison?” Eddie asks in the most cliche way, wiggling his eyebrows a little, but Steve shakes his head.

“Strictly on water tonight. Gotta get up early tomorrow.” He says, and Eddie softens and nods. Once their drinks are in front of them, he holds his glass up to Steve in a mock toast.

“To making it the fuck out of Hawkins?”

“Cheers to that.” Steve laughs, clanking their glasses together and taking a sip.

“Any reason you stayed in the Midwest?” Eddie asks, before he can stop himself. “Sorry, you don’t have to… you don’t owe me an explanation.”

“Nah, it’s… a few reasons. Couldn’t go too far without them, and most of ‘em followed me here, anyway. And then the chips fell and I ended up on the Blackhawks and there’s kind of no other team I’d rather play for.” Steve explains, leaning a little closer to Eddie with a smile. “Speaking of; are you ready for the game?”

Eddie can’t help but grin back at Steve and laugh a little. “You know, I honestly have no idea what I’m getting in to here. All I remember from watching games on TV is that it’s violent.”

“Not always.” Steve defends quickly, before showing a slight mercy. “It’s cold in there, because of the ice. You’ll want to wear layers.”

“Layers. Noted.” Eddie stores the information away for tomorrow, suddenly concerned he hadn’t even thought about an outfit for the game before the conversation.

As they talk, Robin appears with a basket of cheese curds but pulls it away as Eddie reaches to take one. 

“What’s your favorite movie?” She asks, and Steve laughs and shakes his head at her.

“Is this a quiz? I’m not good at tests, I flunked out of senior year.” Eddie whines before he stops to think about it. “Uh, well. The answer you’d probably expect from me is Almost Famous, but it’s actually a close second to Dead Poets Society.” 

She narrows her eyes at him but slides the basket in his direction. “I can’t tell if you picked either of those because you thought it was the answer I wanted, or because they’re actually your favorite, so I have to give you curds.”

“They’re actually my favorites!” Eddie laughs around a mouthful of cheese curds.

“Dead Poets is one of Robin’s favorites, too.” Steve offers, and Robin nods.

“Steve will tell you his favorite movie is Risky Business, because he thinks Tom Cruise is hot, but it’s actually Go Figure. You know, the Disney movie about the ice skater who joins her school’s hockey—” Robin is grinning until Steve clasps a hand over her mouth.

“Robin is incredibly annoying when she wants to be,” He grumbles, and Eddie can’t help but laugh at their antics.

“Well, now you’ve got my attention. If Go Figure isn’t your favorite movie, what is?” Eddie asks.

Steve thinks for a moment. “I think Back to the Future feels like a safe answer.” He shrugs, and Eddie glances at Robin to gauge her reaction. She seems to approve, as she gives Steve a soft smile, pats his back, then stands from their table.

“I’ll leave you two alone, I suppose.” She says, leaning close to both of them. “Behave, got it? No funny business before the game.”

Steve flushes and flounders a little, his mouth opening and closing a few times before he just huffs and takes a sip from his water. While Eddie feels his whole face get hot in a blush, he can’t help but laugh a little.

“Is there funny business we could have gotten up to?” He dares to ask, and it’s worth it just to watch the way Steve blushes and bites at his lip. 

“Maybe. But I guess you’ve got to wait until after tomorrow’s game to find out.”

________________________________________________________

Wow! Thank you all so much for the overwhelming support you’ve shown this little idea I had! I might just keep this going as a series, with updates on Mondays (Tuesdays at the latest). This is also double the word count of part 1, oops, lol.

I'm going to try to tag everyone in the replies because I hit the character limit! Tumblr wouldn't take them all, so sorry to everyone I missed, I still love you and appreciate the support!

#steddie #steddie hockey au #steddie rockstar au #rockstar!eddie munson #hockey player!steve harrington #eddie munson #steve harrington #robin buckley #dustin henderson #corroded coffin #stranger things #starkidmunson writes #glitter & crimson

[goosita]

I LOVE your writing I get so excited when you post! Could you write something about rivals taking Billy’s Girl and him going CRAZY till he gets her back? And then the comfort after that🥹

ooo ough oh my god he would go insane like i truly mean he would level an entire city for you if he had to

the moment he finds you in the back of the house, bound to a chair and gagged, his emotions begin a war inside of him. he’s so filled with rage that his hands shake and his teeth with ache in the morning from clenching them so hard. blood is splattered across his shirt, flecks drying on his cheek from the men he’d gunned down and fought just to get in here, and here you finally were.

he lost track of how many rounds he’d fired. all he knows is that he’d dropped several bodies. if he counted, he would realize he’d taken out the entire gang who had plotted to take you and hold you for ransom with the eventual goal to turn in the famous outlaw. there was no way in hell billy would ever let that happen; he’d lay his life down in a heartbeat to keep you safe and sound.

“baby,” he breathes, voice trembling. he rushes over and makes quick work of untying you, releasing the handkerchief tied around your mouth to keep you quiet.

“oh, baby i’m so sorry,” he murmurs, pulling you into his arms. he can feel you shaking like a leaf, but you hug him so tight he thinks his ribs might crack; not that he’d care anyway. “i should have been faster, i should have known sooner that you—“

“shhh, billy. i’m okay. i’m fine, you’re here,” you soothed, clinging to him. he can feel your fingers digging into his back hard enough to bruise. he hopes they do, honestly. he wants any mark you leave on him.

“m’gonna get you home, okay? never gonna let you out of my sight. never, you hear me?” he shrugs off his outer flannel shirt, dressing you in it and pulling you in again to press a long and lingering kiss to your forehead. billy keeps you tucked into his side, leading you to the front door.

“i need you to close your eyes, darlin’,” he says, stroking your hair. “don’t want you to see…any of this. okay?” he doesn’t want you to see any of the trail of gore he’s left. you’re too sweet, too innocent to ever be subjected to the sight of such violence.

you nod and squeeze your eyes shut, but as he leads you outside, the sharp metallic scent of blood hits your nose and you suddenly understand just why exactly he doesn’t want you to see. things had gotten very intense, you knew this. billy was a dangerous man. he had been since the day you met him, but it never bothered you. you weren’t even sure if it bothered you now, when he was so kind and gentle with you.

he helped you up onto his horse and climbed on behind you, slipping his arms around your waist and clicking his tongue to get the animal to turn and head the other direction. after a few minutes, you felt his nose nudge your shoulder.

“you still got those eyes closed?”

you nodded, leaning back into his chest even more.

“you can open ‘em now, pretty girl. nothing bad to see out here,” he promises, kissing your cheek. your eyes flutter open and the sky above is a deep navy blue, clouds just beginning to glow with the promise of a sunrise.

“never gonna let anything bad happen to you ever again, i promise. i’m so sorry,” he whispers. you shake your head and turn to glance up at him behind you. billy stops his horse and drops one of the reins, lifting his hand to hold your chin gently.

“it’s okay, billy. i’m okay. you got there just in time,” you assure him. your eyes scan his face, now noticing the dried blood in a splash pattern on billy’s jaw. the way his bright blue irises looked stormy still, the tension in his body still tight. his thumb caresses your bottom lip, his face softening.

he looked down at you for a long moment before dipping his head, resting his forehead against the back of your shoulder. your violent man, your outlaw, your gunslinger. william h. bonney, billy the kid, wasn’t afraid of anything. that’s what most people assumed; but he was terrified of anything happening to you, his sweet angel. his darling girl who kept him sane.

“billy?” you whispered. you felt him hum, his chest vibrating against your back. “take me home.”

and so he did.

#billy the kid #billy the kid x reader #billy the kid x you #anon #tom blyth #tom blyth x reader #william h bonney

[golden1u5t]

hii!! I love the way you write I was wondering if you could do a fic of Spencer and read based off hozier new song too sweet? (If you want ofc) this is my first time requesting something so I’m sorry if it’s bad 😭

ꨄ pairing: spencer reid x fem!reader

ꨄ genre: fluff? maybe angst.

ꨄ summary: spencer is your dad’s best friend and you’re fresh out of college. what happens when he’s innocently picking you up from a night out with your friends turns into a heartbreak?

ꨄ a/n: okay so i originally was gonna do like post prison reid but then i was like okay so what if i combined post-prison!reid and dbf!reid??? also reader is kinda like sunshine!reader i guess.

“i didn’t really have that much to drink, you know.” you held onto spencer’s arm as he guided you out of the bar, you leaned into him when the cold, crisp air of the night hit you. “i wasn’t ready to leave yet.”

“well, you called me.” he grumbled, moving his arm and wrapping it around your waist to help stabilize you better. he'd be lying to himself if he said he didn't enjoy the feeling of his arms around you and you curled into his side.

spencer fished his car keys out of his pocket and unlocked the car, letting go of you momentarily so that he could open the passenger door. you pulled his jacket from around you and sat down in the car, spencer leaning in after you and buckling you up. he knows you were more than capable of buckling yourself in so he wasn't sure why he did it for you. maybe it was an unconscious feeling of wanting to take care of you, he wasn't sure.

you could smell his cologne and whatever shampoo he used on his hair with how close he was, but he standing up straight and closing the door before you could make out the smell of it. a few seconds later he was in the drivers seat cranking up the car.

“you could’ve called my dad. if i didn’t know any better i’d think you actually cared for me.” you smile at him and turn your body towards him. you don’t think you would’ve been so bold if you hadn’t been drinking but you had the drinks to blame for anything you might be bold enough to finally say to him.

“good thing you know better.” spencer let out a scoff and glanced over at you, his eyes meeting your wide and hopeful ones for a brief moment before he was focusing back on the road.

for the entirety of the drive to your apartment you talked about any and everything that came to your mind and spencer listened to you the entire time without interrupting. when you got to your complex, spencer walked you up to your apartment to make sure you got in safe.

"will you be okay for the rest of the night?" spencer asked as you pulled your key out of the lock and stepped inside your home, he was still standing in the hallway with his hands in his pockets.

"yeah, i think i'll probably watch a movie or something." you set your bag down on the floor and placed your keys on one of the hooks on the wall, turning around to find him still on the outside. "you're not coming in?"

“i don’t think that’s a good idea.” spencer pressed his lips into a thin line and shook his head. he’s only been in your apartment once and that was when he was helping your dad move your furniture in. to him, going into your apartment with you alone would be crossing some line between him and your dad.

you could only roll your eyes at him. you and spencer had only really had a few real conversations since he’d became friends with your dad and every time he always acted like it was a chore to engage in conversation, like you weren’t a full grown adult.

“i’m my own person, spencer, aside from being your friends daughter—oh, and not to mention a full grown adult— and i think we could really be-“

in the midst of your ranting spencer had taken a step forward, and you didn’t even realize until his hands were on your face and his lips were on yours. you hadn’t had time to properly react and before you had the chance to kiss back he was pulling away from you.

“that was- i was so out of line.” he let out a groan as he ran his hands over his face, he took a step back so he wasn’t inside your apartment anymore. your eyes were wide with confusion as you took a step closer to him but spencer quickly put his hand out in front of him to stop you from getting any closer.

“spencer, i don’t think-“

“no, you’re young and naive and- and so full of life, not to mention your dad is my best friend, we’re polar opposites. it was wrong of me to do that and i’m sorry.” spencer rushed out. you weren’t able to get another word in before he was gone down the hallway.

ꨄ another a/n: so this was absolute shit. i guess the rejection is my interpretation of what the song means but idk.

#criminal minds #spencer reid #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid fanfiction #spencer reid x fem!reader #sub!spencer #dom spencer reid #fem!reader #softdom spencer reid #spencer reid imagine #postprison!spencer #dbf!reid #dbf!spencer reid #spencer reid x fem!reader angst #spencer reid angst

[yukidragon]

Sunny Day Jack - Drunk Headcanons

First ramble of the new year. Whoo! I was considering what would be fitting, then I wound up thinking about all the drinking that happens at New Years’ parties and figured, why not go with some drunken headcanons?

Content warning: this post contains talk of drinking, negative experiences with drinking, being drunk, and maybe some smut as well.

Talking about drunk headcanons also gives me the excuse to break out the drunk Jack art drawn by the ever awesome Sauce, since it’s very relevant. Credit as always goes to them for their amazing work and for being cool with me using their art in my rambles about the awesome characters they’ve created.

Isn’t Jack such a cute drunk? Funny how he’s only drunk when MC is though… possibly. After all, pictures like these don’t technically count as canon unless they’re in the game or on one of the official Sunny Day Jack pages, which you can find conveniently listed here.

Speaking of, why not consider supporting the SnaccPop Studios Patreon? If you sign up, you’ll get to see all sorts of exclusive pieces of art and sneak peeks at the lore, as well as amazing audio dramas. It’s well worth joining, in my humble opinion. Just remember to please not share anything privately posted on the patreon. Reposting paid content only hurts the team.

Anyway, back to the topic of drunk Jack, and specifically the teaser art by Sauce that may or may not be canon still.

I’ve talked about this picture before, particularly what it suggests for Jack’s powers, how it probably means he can be influenced by MC’s hormones, and how much he might be affected by MC’s state of being and vice-versa. To summarize, I believe that Jack and MC can sense how the other is feeling, both physically and emotionally, but it’s not quite as strong as the other is experiencing it, and it can be blocked out or minimized. I’ve alluded to it in Sunshine in Hell, as well as some of my short stories, especially the one where Alice is in a lot of pain.

So, as this picture suggests, if MC gets drunk, Jack does too. It makes me wonder though if he broke character and drank alcohol, he could be the one to get both of them drunk instead? The possibilities of these implications, canon to the game or not, are quite intriguing.

Of course, we can’t talk about drunk headcanons without considering what kind of drunk Jack and the rest of the crew might be. As they say, drunk words are sober thoughts, and alcohol does lower inhibitions…

Naturally, it’s kind of dangerous for a yandere character to be drunk. Self-control would be lessened, if not thrown out the window entirely if he’s totally hammered. I think Jack would be a clingy sort of drunk, hanging off his sunshine, shamelessly needing their warmth and reassurance that they love him and need him just as badly. He’s also a possessive and protective drunk, not wanting anyone else near MC. He’d probably insist on carrying them around everywhere even while he’s stumbling, though it’d take one near fall for him to decide that sitting with them in his lap is the better option. He needs to keep them safe, keep them close.

If you think Jack can be clingy normally, he is like glue when drunk, or at least I think so. Even if he was dutifully staying home like MC wanted them, once the drinks hit him through their connection, he’s got to be with them, no matter where they are. Suddenly there’s a clown in the club or party checking to see if they’re okay and wanting to take them home, hanging off them like a big warm blanket while trying to convince them to go and keep them safe from anyone that might take advantage of them.

Once agreeing to leave, Jack would probably forget about any implications or issues that might arise from carrying MC in a crowd of people. Hopefully no one is sober enough to film anything that might complicate things when he’s whisking MC away off into the night. He’s certainly not in any state to really consider consequences.

Well, maybe if they’re lucky any such videos would be assumed to be hoaxes. There’s certainly no shortage of fake “ghost” videos online. Maybe Shaun could use it to promote an upcoming movie…

Of course, if the relationship between MC and Jack is rocky, his desperation is cranked up while drunk. He needs them so, so badly.

Worse, if MC is getting physical with someone else, showing them love instead of him… Jack might not be able to hold back his yandere impulses to make sure that no one steals his sunshine away. He’d certainly have a lot of work to do once sober to convince his sunshine that he was just protecting them from being taken advantage of while drunk, especially if things escalated to outright violence. The level of intoxication, and the intensity of the moment would likely decide how far things might spiral.

Of course, you know me and how much of a sucker I am for my OTP being happy, so let’s swing back around to the fluffier extreme. If MC and Jack are in a relationship, that’s when Jack is drunkenly telling them how much he loves them, and that they should just go home together. There’s not even a token resistance to hold back his true feelings for them. He’s already got them whisked up in his arms, kissing and murmuring sweet words of love. MC is going to have a pretty hard time talking Jack into letting them stay, especially when they’d be more drunk than he is.

Naturally, the type of drunk MC becomes would affect things. Since there are way too many variables there, let’s use that as a segue to how my MC Alice is like when drunk. She’s not the biggest fan of alcohol, disliking beer, and only drinking sweet flavored mixed drinks socially before the breakup with Ian. Even then, it was rare that she got drunk at all.

After the breakup, the idea of drinking scares Alice, especially to the point of being drunk. She almost died after all. As such, the only way she’s getting sloshed in the present day is if she’s unaware that what she’s consuming has alcohol in it until it’s too late.

It’s kind of a shame, as Alice is a giggly, affectionate drunk. She stops caring about people around them and just wants to cling to her partner, giggling between kisses, occasionally gnawing on them or licking them playfully and saying silly things. Ian got quite embarrassed by how overly affectionate she was the few times she got tipsy when they were out with friends, though he certainly enjoyed the attention.

Needless to say, when Alice got drunk after finding out Ian cheated, she was anything but giggly or affectionate. Though the less said about that the better for now. Let’s keep this to fun headcanons, shall we?

Alice is also affectionate to her friends when drunk, telling them that she loves them, giving big hugs and saying what she loves about them. It was very hard on Shaun’s heart the one time he was around when Alice was drunk. She glomped onto him and told him she loved him soooooooooooo much while giggling happily~!

Of course, it was cut into by Ian crying because he was also drunk and thus more sensitive to things, so Alice went over to reassure him that she loved him mostest of all. It was a hard night for Shaun to be the sober driver.

Jack would sadly not get to experience this side of Alice. At least, not under normal circumstances. Knowing she doesn’t drink and isn’t comfortable even drinking a little bit, the moment he felt her get drunk, his protective instincts would kick into overdrive. What if someone spiked her drink? What if they had awful intentions? Even if he found out it was an innocent mistake, probably even a mixup, he would still be very concerned about her.

Well… until Alice latches onto Jack, squeezing him tight in a big hug as she tells him that she loves him. Oh how his heart would feel ready to burst, especially if they’re not together yet at the time. He longed to hear those words from her for so long… it’s just a shame that she’s saying them while drunk. Still, you better believe that his tipsy butt is going to tell her he loves her too. That would send Alice into a fit of happy giggles as she snuggles into his chest, since, let’s face it, her guilty impulses are on full display and his chest has always felt so nice and soft to cuddle.

Jack would be struggling to hold himself back and retain some sense of sobriety, to not ruin things, but it’s so hard when Alice is being so affectionate with him. Yet, he worries that her love for him isn’t the same as the love he feels for her. This is especially true if she was hugging and loving on other friends when he showed up.

Of course, even while drunk, Alice wouldn’t be open to physical contact with just anybody, only those she trusts. Being touched by someone she doesn’t know/trust would result in her fleeing to her nearest trusted friend/loved one to hide behind them, maybe even insisting they protect herrrr, and telling the person who tried to touch her to go away! Shoo! Shoo!

Naturally, if Alice was drunk while she and Jack were a couple, it would be a very strange sight for anyone else there to see her cuddling up to thin air, kissing, licking, gnawing, etc. It’d be even more outrageous to see her scooped up into the air! Hopefully Shaun isn’t there to see it and have his heart broken further. Though if he was around while Alice was drunk, and he was still sober, he would be getting her to drink water and getting her out of there since he knows she doesn’t want to drink alcohol anymore. So he’d be stepping in to help her out until Jack swooped in to steal Alice away from him… again.

Speaking of Shaun, he strikes me as a giggly drunk as well. Though he turns it more into a performance. He’s talking about stories he knows to anyone who will listen. Or anyone who is not listening, since he’d be drunk off his butt. I’m talking grand gestures, booming voice, passion thrown into it as he cries over touching moments in a movie he saw, or what he was directing. Oh, his actors killed it in the beach scene! He’ll tell you all about it, then get interrupted by a different thought halfway through the story, probably something he thinks will be a good idea for another film that he has to scribble onto a napkin. Of course, it becomes a weird scrawl that’s barely legible and makes no sense, but it was certainly exciting to him in the moment!

Of course, Shaun enjoys a good buzz. It makes him want to purr, so it’s a good tell for when he’s getting tipsy. He’s very responsible when he’s the designated sober person, but when he’s ready to cut loose, he’s a tomcat ready to play!

While Shaun is a more bubbly and fun drunk, I think that Ian is the opposite. When he has a nice buzz, he feels pretty good, but when it goes too far and he starts getting drunk… that’s when everything goes downhill. This cropped picture drawn by Sauce makes me think that when Ian gets drunk, that’s when his guilt and self-loathing hits him hard.

Poor guy needs therapy. Also, if you want to see the full picture, which is very NSFW, check it out over on Sauce’s twitter. While you’re there, send them some love for all their amazing art and characters!

I think Ian needs constant reassurance while drunk, especially from his partner. He clings to MC and feels lonely even if they’re a foot away from him. He cries at the drop of a hat, even for silly things like how tragic that is that snakes don’t have legs. Why don't they have legs? It's unfair! He’s going to be needing help not to get dehydrated from all the crying and the alcohol, and his hangover the next day is a bitch.

Needless to say, when Ian and Alice were drunk together, it was a very mushy scene. Ian would be down on himself, then Alice would smoosh his cheeks and tell him to listen to her because he is a prince. Prince Charming! No one else is better. That’d get the waterworks going, and he’d cling to her, crying. She would then start kissing his tears away.

I figure this too also happened when Shaun was around because I’m very mean with the guy and his unrequited crush. Sorry, Shaun, but it’s just too much fun teasing you, haha. Don’t worry though, he’s going to find his own happy ending in Sunshine in Hell with a partner or two who love him more than anything else in the world. Eventually.

On that note, let’s move on to the final love interest, Nick. Nick strikes me as someone who is very smooth when tipsy, but an absolute mess when sloshed. The filter is gone. He’s got opinions, and by God is he going to give them, even if they don’t really make sense. He especially has strong opinions about bad BDSM. That popular book series they made a movie about called, what was it again, 500 shades of fucked up or something? That is not BDSM. That’s abuse pretending to be BDSM. Do you have any idea what that mess has done to the BDSM community and how many people have done stupid things because of it? And don’t get him started on what an awful idea it is to tie someone up with rope from a hardware store of all places!

I see Nick as the type to start recording himself once his inhibitions are dropped. The people need to know! His thoughts have to get out there! His followers need to know the truth! This is why he makes sure that he has to put in several passwords before he can actually upload anything. He learned his lesson that he can’t trust drunk Nick with his socials the hard way. The fans are still making memes and using clips out of context from that embarrassing old video. At least he bounced back from it by joking about it even if inside he’s still dying of mortification.

Speaking of a drunk with complaints, I had the image of Barry really unloading all his grievances when he’s drunk. Fortunately, he knows better than to get sloshed with any of his employees, but if he did, they’d have a hard time escaping from him insisting that he knows what’s wrong with the service industry and customers and how the hell did his latest marketing gimmick fail?! Can’t they see how cute the new mascot is? He paid way too much to the graphic designer! Do you know what artists charge nowadays? It’s highway robbery!

Since we’re going into employees of Yogurtopia, why don’t I touch real quick on the other people on staff who I expanded upon a little in my earliest headcanon posts? Things have changed since then of course, such as the boss having an actual name now. Needless to say, I’m not going with what I came up with for that post, but let’s do a little rapid fire mode with the rest of the employees I want to use for Sunshine in Hell.

Carol is a flirty drunk, which is a big problem if she’s actually in a committed relationship at the time and the person she’s flirting with isn’t her partner. Though I’m sure she’d give her partner permission ahead of time to have sloppy drunken makeouts and sex with her.

Liz isn’t really a drinker so much as a stoner. Though if drunk they would be doodling on napkins and finding the ceiling tiles fascinating.

Susan is underage and isn’t much for breaking the rules, so it’ll be a few years yet before she’d have to worry about how she’d be as a drunk.

I know I haven’t touched on these characters a lot, but I figured why not expand on them when I can, even in small ways. If nothing else, it should make it easier for me to come up with more ideas of what parts they could play in the bigger picture of Sunshine in Hell.

Speaking of my OCs, why don’t I touch on the rest of the King family while I’m at it?

Mama Lycoris enjoys herself a nice glass of wine with good company, most notably her husband, whose name is still undecided. (I’ve narrowed it down to Eden, Seb, Luan, Yuri, or Heliotrope. Picking character names is hard sometimes.) It’s rare for her to get drunk, but when she does, she seeks out her husband, even if she just lost track of him for being out of sight. She’s the type to do the meme where she’s crying while texting them that she misses them while he was just in the bathroom. Once she finds them, she’s crawling in his lap telling them how much she loves him~

Papa King usually is the sober one at a party, embarrassed by his wife loving on them when she’s tipsy. Sometimes Lycoris pretends to be tipsy just to get him flustered. They do occasionally have a glass for a special occasion, like toasting at his anniversary or a special holiday. When drunk, they’re a sleepy sort of drunk, pretty out of it and just off in his own little happy world. They haven’t yet been drunk before though, or even gotten tipsy, as he drinks very responsibly.

Barbie isn’t one for drinking, even socially. Though that’s probably not surprising considering she’s not a very social person. If she did get drunk though, she’d be a mean drunk, eyeballing anyone who looks at her funny and ready to jump into any excuse to fight. It’s probably a good thing she doesn’t drink!

Though, I suppose if Barbie was drunk around Bo, she’ll probably let her dom side out more, ordering him around and getting a bit rough with him. Good thing Bo is a big strong alpha and can’t get drunk due to being an AI, so he’ll be able to take care of his puppy even when she’s gone a bit feral due to alcohol.

Coraline also doesn’t drink, but that’s because she can’t due to medical reasons. It interferes with her prescription medications, so it’s probably best if she sticks with non-alcoholic beverages. If she did get drunk, however, she would probably be similar to her father, being off in her own little world, looking at things as if they were fascinating. She would probably be very keenly interested in holding Elias’ head and examining his neck stump up close, which I’m sure her poor groom wouldn’t quite be comfortable with. He would have to make sure to redirect her focus elsewhere until she sobered up.

Of course, I can’t just end things there. I haven’t gushed nearly enough about Jack and Alice having some drunk shenanigans in a more specific sort of scenario. It might turn into some writing, or it might not, but it’s my post, and I can ramble on longer about my OTP if I want to.

As I said earlier, Jack would be very concerned upon noticing that he’s starting to get tipsy. At first he would probably be confused as to how lightheaded he is, until he realizes that it’s because of his sunshine’s influence. The immediate order of business after that is to find Alice and check to see if she’s okay. With lower inhibitions, it would be hard for him not to worry that someone spiked her drink or something.

While someone spiking Alice’s drink would make for some interesting drama, and a target for Jack to go yandere on for taking advantage of his sunshine… I think I’ll stick with something more innocent for this post and say that there was a mixup with her drink or Alice was unaware something someone brought at the party’s potluck had a high alcohol content until it was too late.

Though if y’all want me to chase that darker and more dramatic plot bunny of Alice getting her drink spiked by some unscrupulous character, and Jack has to save her, do let me know~ ;3

Back to the lighter scenario. While it is intriguing to imagine how torn Jack would be if Alice is loving on him while they’re not together, and she means tells him she loves him in a clearly platonic way, which wrenches his heart… At the moment, I’m more drawn to how much of a cock block it’d be for him if Alice was getting frisky with her affection and turning Jack on, forcing him to hold back his urges and stay responsible even though what he wants to do is take her and fill her with his love until her legs are too wobbly to allow her to stand anymore. He might be tipsy too, but she’s outright drunk, and he’s not going to take advantage of his sunshine in an inebriated state!

Of course, Jack’s first order of business is to get Alice home. It doesn’t matter if they’re in the middle of a party full of people, he’s carrying his sunshine home. Alice doesn’t protest being scooped up by her boyfriend, just giggling in delight before peppering his cheek and neck with kisses now that she’s in range. She also makes sure to tell Jack how she just loves him so, so, so, so, soooooo much~!

Jack does try to be discreet in getting Alice away from the party. He might be pretty tipsy, and his steps a little unsteady, but he needs to protect his sunshine. He needs to take care of her, be responsible. It’s what he’s there for after all.

It’s just a little hard for Jack to focus on walking straight when Alice keeps nipping at his skin. Her giggling tickles his ear too, and it’s hard for him not to melt when she tells him she loves him and that he tastes so sweet.

Having a hardon would also make it difficult for Jack to focus on walking straight. Poor guy. Alice doesn’t think about what she’s doing as she keeps kissing, licking, and nibbling on him, her hands wandering and squeezing his chest despite him trying to gently redirect her attention. He needs her to stop, since he can’t focus, but at the same time he really wants her to continue.

The first order of business once they get back home is to make sure Alice sobers up with some water and food. By the time they’re home, Jack feels like he’s going to go crazy. Like her drunkenness affected him, his horniness affects her, and those playful affections become more lusty as her inhibitions are lowered and the idea of teasing Jack and making him feel good becomes more and more appealing. Eventually it gets to the point that she’s being much more blatant in her teasing, such as tracing his nipples through his shirt with her fingers. Maybe even copping a feel lower down when they’re at the apartment and teasing him about the bulge in his pants.

Needless to say, Jack would be having a very hard time holding himself back. It’d almost be a relief when Alice abruptly nods off due to the alcohol. Of course, he’d have to give himself some real relief, imagining what it would’ve been like if she had sobered up so they could continue. All the while, he’s also swearing to himself that in the morning - provided Alice wasn’t in pain from a hangover - he was going to pay her back for all the love and affection she showed him tonight in spades.

The next morning, Alice is indeed hungover, though not quite as bad as she would’ve been if Jack didn’t have her eat and drink something last night. Of course, Jack is kind and cheerful, endlessly gentle and supportive of her, giving her some painkillers and making her a nice, mild breakfast. She remembers what she did last night and is too embarrassed to talk about it, just thanking Jack for helping her get home.

Though past the embarrassment, fear would slowly build as Alice woke up more and it sunk in how easy it was for her to accidentally get drunk at the party. It was so easy for her to lose control… for something to happen… Jack picks up on her worries right away and reassures her that he’ll always be there to take care of her and keep her safe. He’ll always protect her and make sure nothing bad happens to her. He made sure she got home safely last night, after all.

Jack won’t ever let Alice suffer through anything as awful as the night Ian broke her heart ever again.

Some reassurance and cuddles goes a long way, and Alice is able to let go of her fear and embarrassment to just appreciate how much Jack cares for her and takes care of her, even when the unexpected happens. She melts into his soft and reassuring kisses that soon turn hot and steamy. Suddenly the breakfast dishes are off the table, and she’s the one getting eaten by her very pent up boyfriend.

You better believe that Jack planned to feed Alice then do the deed with her as soon as possible. The moment she shows that she’s receptive to his affection, he starts enacting all the naughty fantasies that he had while giving himself relief the night before, making sure that Alice is the one being driven crazy this time. He won’t rest until she’s begging for him to make love to her. Repeatedly.

Needless to say, if Alice has work that day, she’s missing it. Jack would’ve turned her phone off after sending a text that she’s sick, just in case. There’s no way Jack is letting Barry cockblock him again. Not after he spent a night getting blueballed by a too sexy sunshine that was too drunk to make love to.

Fortunately, in the light of day and fully sober enough to consent, Jack gets to enjoy every inch of Alice, as well as a nice memory of just how fun and affectionate she gets when her inhibitions are lowered. He also has a goal to strive for, to encourage his sunshine to feel freer with him like that when they’re both fully sober so that they can enjoy every second of their lovemaking.

Well, I think that’s a good place to wrap up these drunken headcanons for now. I hope you enjoyed the silliness. It seemed like a good way to start off the year, and it certainly would be a fun start of the new year for these two!

@channydraws @earthgirlaesthetic @sai-of-the-7-stars @cheriihoney @illary-kore @okamiliqueur

#Sunny Day Jack #Something's Wrong With Sunny Day Jack #SunnyDayJack #sdj #swwsdj #Headcanon Ramblings #Sauce-y Art

[intothegenshinworld]

Note: This lil guy named Arabalika is the most OP thing in Genshin. I HAD to write something about him

Warning: Aranara’s

Since everyone liked the last post, I made more

'Protector of World'

The Aranara’s, despite being small, have made it clear that they’ll protect you.

Some are braver than others, but all will stand between you and danger when needed. It’s their mission to protect the forest, but without the world, where can the forest exist? And maybe you like the little bodyguards a bit too much to deny them the idea of ‘protecting’ you.

Well, it’s safe to say you were underestimating them.

One day you were out with a couple of Aranara’s to gather Vasmtri from a nearby nursery. Even outside Varanara you enjoyed the scenery and beauty of the forest, so it wasn’t uncommon for you to get distracted. Even now, you had taken a detour to gather some flowers.

Two small Aranara’s stood next to your kneeling figure in between the flowers. ‘Don’t you want to see the flowers, Arabalika?’ You ask your main bodyguard that stood a bit further away on the hill. His small green body was tense like always, and he holds his small staff at the ready should danger arise.

The green Aranara doesn’t turn around but replies, ‘Arabalika smell too much iron. Not good.’ You hum in response, your fingers are still busy gathering flowers to weave together later. ‘It’s alright to take a break now and then, Arabalika.’ You turn around and smile at him. ‘Don’t you like flowers?’

The Aranara grunts slightly. ‘Arabalika only knows how to protect.’

One of the two Aranara’s at your side hands you a flower. ‘We must hurry before seeds grow into sprouts.’ You grab the flower and smile to yourself. The little creatures never fail to make you happy. ‘I’m sorry, I’ll hurry up so we can leave. We should be close to the nursery, right?’

The other Aranara at your side wiggles closer. ‘Not close, not far either.’ With the flowers in your hand you stand up from your place. ‘World, must stick close to Arabalika.’ Your little bodyguard is in his same spot and you try to reassure him, ‘I won’t leave your side.’

‘Arabalika is not talking about that. Big iron chunk is close.’ As the Aranara ends his sentence you feel the earth rumble below you. The two Aranara at your side huddle closer to your form. ‘Iron chunk?’ You call out to the small Aranara.

‘Don’t worry. Arabalika will protect our World.’ He readies his little staff. ‘Stay behind Arabalika.’

When a giant form walks up the hill you feel your heart skip a beat. His words start to make sense. The ruin guard is the iron chunk. As an attempt to save the Aranara you yell out, ‘Watch out!’ with an outstretched arm you try to reach for him, but the two in front of you shield your form with their own powers, keeping you safe and away from the ruin guard.

It doesn’t take long for the ruin guard to reach Arabalika. There is no fear in his small body as he lifts up his staff. With a swift and steady hit, the ruin guard stumbles backwards, presumably defeated. You blink a few times as you watch Arabalika lower his staff again.

The green shield that formed around you and the other two Aranara’s disappears when the ruin guard fully stopped its staggered movements. You watch your small bodyguard wiggle his body around to face you. ‘Arabalika will protect World. Vana is not safe anymore.’

You remain stunned for a few more moments. You’re slightly concerned that the Aranara took out a ruin guard with one hit,

O well, at least you have a cute bodyguard.

#genshin #genshin impact #genshin x reader #genshin impact x reader #sagau #sagau x reader #genshin impact sagau #genshin sagau #aranara #sagau creator #genshin fluff #imposter sagau #sagau cult au #sagau isekai #genshin isekai #genshin isegau

[batmanschmatman]

It’s interesting to me to see how many people have been saying they feel like [character’s] death was too sudden or too early, and while I agree from a writing standpoint we didn’t exactly have a lot of time with him and they COULD have framed the show differently to give us more, I also think it’s sort of The Point that his death is sudden and kind of out of nowhere.

The air war was incredibly fucking brutal. I’m not saying it was more or less so than what the BOB or TP guys went through because they’re all awful, but it’s a well accepted part of the WWII experience that anything to do with flying planes might have seemed glamorous and cool but was actually terrifying and had a sort of uniquely horrible flavor to it when it came to facing the death of your friends.

(And this isn’t even getting into the stuff happening on the ground when cities became viable targets, but that’s for a different post.)

When Hoobler dies, the guys are there, they see it happen, they can try to help him, and then they know after a point that he’s dying. They can sit with the body afterward and take his stuff to send back to his family. Even in the more fast paced deaths like Rob Oswalt, Sledge and the others can look at his body and have a moment - however brief! - to say goodbye. There’s often no mystery of what happened, you’ve seen the wounds and know they’re dead. And you also HAVE to push it down because you’re being shot at and need to keep yourself alive. 

All of that is real important in the grief/mourning process. Guys in the 100th usually didn’t have that unless someone on your bomber died. You’d go up with your friends, you’d see their planes get hit, there’s nothing you can do besides watch for chutes and hope they survive to be taken prisoner. And then you come back, and your friends are gone, there’s no body to bury or sit with or touch. Their stuff is all still in the barracks like nothing happened. Sometimes you’re not even immediately sure if they are dead or not! You don’t know who those chutes belonged to, or if they made it safely to the ground instead of dying on impact or immediately being caught by the Germans and executed. But your friends are gone and you were powerless to do anything to help them.

And then you get to do it all over again knowing it’s going to happen to other friends or to you and there’s basically nothing you can do about it. How do you cope with that? What does it do to you to feel like your friends just literally vanished into thin air even though the last time you saw them, they were healthy and young and alive? And then new guys replace them, and you have to decide if you want to make friends with them or close yourself off, because these guys are going to die too.

(Oh, and if a member of your crew got badly wounded? You could have HOURS before you got back to base, and you have some first aid training but you’re not a surgeon, you don’t have plasma or whole blood to give a guy to help keep him alive until you make it back. So another horrible traumatic thing you get to deal with. Wounds that could’ve been treatable if you’d been at Carentan or Guadalcanal could be fatal.) 

I’m not saying this show is a masterpiece in storytelling by any means, but… You’re supposed to feel shocked and angry and robbed of the chance to get to know these guys? Because that’s literally how their friends felt. It’s a point Miller makes a lot in the book, and a really vital part to understanding why being in the AAF (or other air forces) was such a meat grinder physically and psychologically for these guys. 

#masters of the air #masters of the air spoilers #history stuff

[the1975attheirverybest]

Education

Lesson #7: Communication is KEY.

A/N: well; you asked for it. It’s here.

Warnings: smut. Also not entirely proof read cuz I wanted to post it today for y’all so…

———

“Amelia?” Matty called out to her from behind the door, resting his forehead against it. “Can I please come in?” He cooed.

He knocked this time, in case she hadn’t heard him, “Amelia, darlin, please let me in.” He listened carefully for a shuffling of feet, any signs of movement at all, but none came. Soon, he began to pace back and forth to alleviate the raging of his heart. “Amelia, please. Open the door- please, I need to know that you’re alright.”

The silence was unbearable. As he paced by the bathroom door, Matty went over the events of the night in his mind, combing through every detail as he remembered it, trying to identify the moment that things went wrong.

He’d spent the entire way to the party wondering if she was going to be there. She’d designed the art work for the album that they were about to celebrate, so he’d hoped that Jamie would’ve had the sense to invite her. It’d gotten difficult to get a hold of her after their last phone call. Which, embarrassingly, he’d been too drunk to remember the details of. He has a vague recollection of talking to her, touching himself, alone, in his hotel bed, listening to her moan on the other end of the phone and wishing that she were eighth there with him. But he doesn’t remember much else. The texts were sparse and far between after that night. She wouldn’t pick up whenever he tried to FaceTime her. He’d written it off as time zone issues. It wouldn’t be the first time that his friendships or relationships were affected by his itinerant lifestyle. As he’d learned the hard way, over the years, nothing beats being in the same room with people. No matter how good distant connection is.

He’d spotted her soon after arriving at the event; seen her standing with a group of people that she doesn’t really like. He knew she was too polite to excuse herself from the conversation, so he figured if he inserted himself into the group, he could help pull her away.

If he was being honest with himself, his escape to LA was anything but effective, he’d thought about her every night while he was there. Even when he met up with his hookup. He was ashamed that he’d close his eyes and think of Amelia every time that another woman touched him. Try to remember what she sounded like. How good she felt wrapped around him the last time that he’d fucked her. How good he felt being with her. It took everything in him not to call out her name in another woman’s bed.

So, of course he’d been eager to finally see her again. But was that so wrong? Is that what hurt her? Was he pushy when he asked her to go into the bathroom with him? Did she not want to? She did hesitate, briefly, but he thought it was just because it was an entirely new thing that she’d never done before. And that was the whole point of their arrangement. He was meant to make her feel safe to try things out and figure out what she liked. Gain confidence to do things with other people. How’d they get from that to here?

Matty slid against the bathroom door crumbling yo the floor. “I just want you to know I’m right here, okay? I’m gonna stay right here. I just- I don’t know how to- I don’t know what to do right now, but I’m still here. I haven’t left you. I’m not going to.”

He ran his hands through his hair, attempting to breathe, deeply, and collect himself. Patience has never been a virtue that he possessed, though. “Oh, fuck this.” He mumbled before standing back up and banging on the door. “Amelia, please! Open this fuckin door! At least make a sound so I know that you’re okay in there. I can’t be out here thinking that- that you’ve hit your head against something and need- need- fuck! open this fuckin door!” He banged on the door repeatedly, more aggressive this time, as his patience wore thin.

His hands hurt from knocking against the door and his chest felt tight with worry. He won’t take this anymore. “Right, that’s it, then. I’m getting something to unlock this door with.”

With a 4 minutes YouTube tutorial, a butter knife, and one of his credit cards, he finally managed to open the door without breaking it.

“Oh, Amelia…” his heart sunk when he saw her, sobbing on the bathroom floor, her whole, naked body shaking. The sight paralyzed him for what felt like an eternity. His worst fear had come true. In trying to protect her from the hurt of the potential ill-intentions and miscommunications of complete strangers, by offering to be the person that she could experiment on, or with, he’d somehow wound up hurting her himself. The worst part is that he had no idea what he’d done wrong.

This moment wasn’t about his self-pity and indulgent guilt, he’d feel his feelings later on. Right now, he needed to be there for her. He ran into the room to grab the first thing he could find — his own shirt— and brought it back to wrap her up in, carrying her in his arms. His heart pounded against his chest, terrified that he’d make a wrong move and fuck this up, even more, so he narrated every single step he took, waiting a moment to give her the chance to object.

“Gonna just put this on you, so you don’t catch a cold…alright?” She said nothing. “I- umm- wanna get off the floor?” Again, nothing. “Well- I’m going to pick you up now, okay? If you want me to stop, just- say…say something.” “Bringing you to bed now, unless- well, unless you want to be sat somewhere else.”

She made no effort to protest or to stop him, so he took that as permission and proceeded, slowly, gently, as lightly as he could. His delicate touch and strong arms were a far cry from what was going through his mind. Matty held her in his arms as she wept into his bare chest. With every breath she took, every sniffle, and every tear drop that fell from her face onto his skin, his heart broke over and over again until he thought it couldn’t possible hurt any worse- and then it did.

When he felt her finally go still, her trembling breath calm and even, he looked down, and saw that she was asleep. Should he be relieved that, at least, she wasn’t crying anymore? Or should he focus on thr fact that, whatever he’d done had caused her to cry her eyes out, literally, to the point where she could no longer keep them open? He didn’t have it in him to move her or disrupt the first moment of peace that she’d had all night. So as his body went numb underneath her weight, he replayed their night in his mind, yet again, silent tears running down his face.

***

It was 3 am when Matty awoke from a dreamless sleep. Amelia was now fully wearing his shirt, all buttoned up, and clinging to his body, her legs intertwined in his, her cheek against his stomach, as she slept. The lights were turned out all the way, so she must’ve woken up at some point and walked around the hotel suite. When he stretched out his arm to feel around for his phone, he felt a water bottle on the nightstand. At least she’d had some water. That’s a good sign. Or was he desperate for anything to convince him that she was alright? Did he not deserve to feel relieved yet? Would he ever? He felt weak looking down at her. He wanted to kiss her forehead, to take her pain away, but he had this unshakable feeling that he’d break her, hurt her, cause her harm, if he ever touched her again.

In the morning, his body felt cold without Amelia pressed up against him. He had one text on his phone. It hurt his eyes to read it before they’d blink away the sleep. Mia ❤️: had to leave for a work thing. I’m okay. Thank you.

This was the worst news that he could’ve woken up to. He slammed his head harshly against the pillow, a loud cry tore through his chest.

***

“Matty?” Adam stood in the doorway, smiling, as he watched Matty sprawled out on the floor, arranging his son’s toys in some sort of circle, mumbling to the kid as if they were engaged in a serious conversation. “It’s been a while, what’re you two up to?” Adam walked over to them.”

“We’re creating toy rankings” Matty said matter-of-factly. “You know, like the Premier League tables?”

Adam giggled, Shaking his head. “Okay; I know the baby can’t be THAT entertaining and I’m his dad. So, who or what are you hiding out here from? And why couldn’t you do it at your own house?”

Matty glanced at Adam briefly before returning his attention to the army of toys. “Not hiding.”

“It’s Amelia, isn’t it?” Adam sighed loudly, joining Matty on the floor and instantly taking his son into his lap. “What’ve you done this time?”

Matty ceased his fiddling, cocking his head in shame. “I- erm…I- maybe didn’t pay attention when I should have.” Saying it out loud began to help piece together the situation in his head. “She- was trying to let me know that- that she wasn’t alright. I completely missed it.”

“Don’t sound much like you.” Despite Adam’s concern, he put on a cheerful demeanor to keep his boy happy. The contrast between his face and his words gave the conversation an eerie feel. Marty found it mildly distressing, if fatherly and admirable.

“I know. I fucked things up. Badly.”

“Well, have you apologized to her?”

“I- I want to. I just….can’t look her in the eye. And…..well, if that’s how I feel - Can’t imagine how she must feel.”

Adam said nothing for a long moment. When he spoke again, Matty hadn’t expected him to still be on that train of thought. “Let me ask you this: do you and Amelia ever just….hang out?”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean, like, not for sex. Just- for the sake of hanging out.”

Matty rolled his eyes, insulted by the implications of the question. “Of course we do. All the fuckin time. We went to see a film not too long ago, and, she came to see the set when we were working on the designs for tour. She stayed at mine one night cuz she was too drunk to go home…..” Matty paused, catching his breath, “do you need the dates and times as well? The fuck is ‘do you hang out?’ What kind of question is that!”

“Matty,” Adam looked him straight in the eyes, noting that, by his defensiveness, Adam must’ve hit upon a sore subject. “this all happened before the two of you started….well, fucking. Have you spent any time together as friends since then?”

Matty’s lips instantly parted, he was about to respond with “of course we have! What a ridiculous thing to ask!!” But, as he thought about it, he realized that Adam was right. He and Amelia were no longer really friends. His expression shifted from offended to embarrassed.

“It’s not like you’re incapable of maintaining the friendship.” Adam consoled him. “You’ve slept with friends of yours and kept them as friends before. So, why won’t you do it with Amelia?”

“I-I don’t know. It’s not on purpose. The time has just not been right recently. It’s just the way things have been going. I’ve just been busy. You know this. Band stuff.”

“So you have time to fuck her, but you don’t have time to hang out with her?”

Matty winced unable to bare hearing that about himself. “Well, not when you put it like that….She came to me and asked for this! We made an agreement- it’s not like that! You’re making me sound like a fuckin creep.”

“Go.” Adam nodded towards the door. “Go on, go apologize to her. I gotta get this little man ready for bedtime, anyway. Uncle Matty’s gotta go.”

***

Amelia was stunned when she answered the door, “Matty, what are you-“

“May I come in?” He spoke too quickly, nerves taking over him.

It was late. Plus, Matty never came over unannounced. So, with some confusion and concern, she let him in.

“What’s all this?” She pointed to the bags in his hands.

“We’ll get to that in a minute.” He waved her question away, his eyes scanning the apartment that he’s been to countless times before, with new found novelty. Anything to avoid eye contact. “Wanted to- erm…” he stuttered, still looking around. “how- how’re you feeling? You know, af-after the other night?” Matty stumbled over his words. He’d imagined this conversation going differently in his head. He’d even practiced his words on the way over here. But now that he was standing in front of her, certainty and practiced delicacy had left him. He was terrified. “You left before we could talk…”

Amelia led the way to the kitchen, with Matty trailing sheepishly behind her. She helped him set down the bags l in the kitchen while she considered his question. The answer was too complicated. She shrugged. “I’m okay….I think? I don’t know. I don’t know how I’m feeling. One minute I’m fine, and the next….” She was surprised to feel herself get so emotional so quickly.

All Matty could think was. you did this. You hurt her. You’re the reason she feels this way. He wanted to pick up one of her kitchen knives off the counter and pierce it through his own heart.

“Let- let’s sit down somewhere? Is that alright?”

Amelia’s brows furrowed. It wasn’t like him to be so uncertain. “Sure.”

In the living room, the sat on opposite ends of the same couch, Matty nervously fiddling with the sleeve of his jacket. “So- I think….I think I know how you’re feeling and why it happened. Would you like to hear it?” He looked up at her, briefly.

She smiled nervously. “Sure- I mean, any ideas would be better than no ideas.”

“I think, well, I think we pushed you too far in the bathroom. I was a bit more aggressive than normal.” Matty’s voice got caught in his throat, so he paused, collecting himself. He was determined not to make this about himself and his feelings. He mustn’t speak unless he’s sure that he can control his tone.

“Y-yeah. I mean, I guess? The- umm, hair pulling, and the whole bending over thing…you being demanding. We’d never done any of that before.”

Matty nodded, “go-go on. It’s good. It’s good to hear you say these things.”

“Not sure what else to say.” She shrugged. “I mean, I liked it. All of it. It was just…a shock. Like, too many new things at the same time, you know?”

“Mhm…keep- keep going.” Matty was positively trembling.

“Ummm….I don’t know. That’s it I guess? It was just overwhelming for a moment. But for some reason it made things better. Like- when you told me to fade away from you and bend over? At first- I panicked-“

“Can I ask why?” His eyes shot up, meeting hers.

“Oh, gosh. This is embarrassing.” She mumbled under her breath. “Cuz- cuz I couldn’t see you. I like seeing your face. I like being able to tell that you were happy with me. That I was doing what you wanted me to do.” Her face turning read, she smiled. “But- the panic, it made the orgasm even better. I didn’t hate it, necessarily….it was just…a lot.”

Matty was tongue tied, his thoughts spiraling. He couldn’t find a beginning or an end to anchor himself to.

“Matty? Are you with me?” Amelia attempted to meet his gaze. “Honestly, I mean it! It didn’t hurt or feel unpleasant. I just-“

“Yeah, well, we’ve talked about this happening in theory.” Matty finally regained his footing. “Remember when I told you to read some shit about ‘subspace’ ? I think…..the excitement, the pain, the pleasure, the anxiety- perfect storm. A cocktail of Adrenalin and endorphins to push you over the edge.”

“Oh.”

“Would explain the sudden inability to speak…the overly emotional state, the….eagerness to do more.” Matty listed all the indications that he recalled her showing.

“Can I ask….Is that- umm….would it also happen to be why everything felt so…strong? Like lights and noises and stuff?”

Matty’s heart ached in his chest. He was sure that kitchen knife stab would be easier to take than this. “Fuck me…..yes, yes it would explain that as well.” He closed his eyes, willing the tears to stay where they are. “Anyway, so, I think, all of that, then throwing that new restrained position on you…demanding that you get me off…it may have been a mistake.” He ran a hand through his hair. “Not ‘may.’ It was a mistake. Definitely. It was my mistake. And I’m- I’m sorry.”

Amelia didn’t know how to feel about this new revelation. She was glad to have an explanation for how her body and her mind had felt, not to feel so helpless over her emotions, but she had no idea what to make of any of it.

“It gets worse.” Matty confessed. “Once you’d safe-worded, i- I should’ve done more. Been better. Taken better care of you.”

“Oh. No…matty you did good. I felt okay. I mean, not really, I was feeling entirely disconnected from my body, but-“

“Yeah that’d be the subspace psychology…”

“Like afterwards. I felt okay waking up the next morning. Just….confused and embarrassed.”

Matty laughed. “So…not okay.”

She smiled at him, “it’s really not that bad, looking back on it now…”

“I was scared. I owed you better. But I was scared that I’d hurt you. I suppose I- didn’t want to admit to myself that I’d missed all the signs. Let it get to a point where you had to tap out. And we hadn’t umm….we hadn’t made a real plan for what happens if you do tap out. I mean, we have our aftercare routine for afterwards….but, I should’ve anticipated that we’d both be in a completely different headspace if we stopped suddenly.” He shrugged. “I got lazy on you.”

“Matty-“

“I did! It’s true. I got complacent. Comfortable. Things were going so well that I didn’t think anything bad could ever happen between us. So- so I was less prepared!!! Even though im always on you about always being prepared. And speaking up. Fuck- what a hypocrite.”

“Matty, don’t say that!”

“I’ve failed you. And I’m so, so, sorry, Amelia.” Matty finally burst into tears. But it didn’t feel enough. He wanted to get on his knees and beg, bow down to her and tell her how much she didn’t deserve his negligence. How much he wishes it were the other way around.

Allowing himself a moment of release, Matty quickly wiped the tears from his eyes and jumped to his feet. “Anyway, erm….the bags in the kitchen. I- I brought some things that we could- I mean, if you’d allow me- and I completely understand if you’d rather not- to make it up to you….take care of you the way that I should have that night. I’ve bought some things. So we could see what you might like to have on hand for emergencies like that. That is….uhhh- if, of course, you’d ever let me touch you again.”

Amelia smiled. “Yeah, I’d like that very much.”

***

“Okay, and then…once you’re calm, well, I guess I’d wanna check for injuries or something.” Matty was running down a new checklist he’d created to ensure that not a single detail is ever lost on him again. “But, since, I’m days later now, and we didn’t use anything that could hurt you….I’ve drawn you a bath, so, if you’d go in there, and- You enjoy that while I get you some food and water.”

“You’d leave me?” Amelia’s voice sounded needier than she’d intended. “By myself?”

Matty was stumped. It was a good thing they were running this rehearsal. “I- erm…had assumed that you’d want some space.”

She shook her head passionately. “No, no! Not at all. All I wanted, that whole night, was you.”

Matty stood there, blinking rapidly, staring at her face. “Okay, then. I’ll sit by the bathtub? Keep you company…”

She stepped forward, hesitantly, decreasing the space between them. “Please get into the bath? With me?” Matty could tell, by the blushing in her face, that this wasn’t easy for her either. “Want you to hold me, please?”

Matty nodded, silently, and began to undress.

***

“Here, you can uhhh…you can have this to wear.”

Amelia looked down at his extended arm and the t shirt that he was offering, chuckling heartily. It was that old ragged brown t shirt that was not so oversized when he’d first bought it. “You love that horrific thing. It’s like your favorite, for some reason.”

“Yes, and you hate it, but it is my favorite, so….now, it’s yours. You know, to wear on days like that. For- I don’t know. Comfort? Not to be so presumptuous as-“

“Shut up and hand it over before I set it on fire or something.”

***

In bed, Matty wrapped his strong, thick arms around her, squeezing her tight, breathing in her hair. She held onto his bicep, her hand tiny in comparison, stroking his arm, up and down, running her fingers over his tattoos. This, she thought to herself, must be the safest place on earth.

With considerable effort, Amelia wiggled within Matty’s tight grip, turning around so she was face to face with him, wrapping her arms around his neck, and pulling herself closer to kiss him. For the first time ever, Matty was stiff to her touch, his lips passive. It wasn’t long before he pulled away, slightly.

“Amelia- what….we shouldn’t.” He whispered despite them being completely alone.

“Matty, please?”

“I don’t want to hurt you again.”

“You’re not going to.”

“It’d be wrong. To- to take advantage. You’re vulnerable right now, and-“

“So are you.” She placed a kiss to his cheek, smiling faintly as she watched his face grow red.

“It’s my job to protect you- we agreed, I’d be a safe trial. I-“

“Please, I need you. I didn’t get to make you feel good last time. Please? Don’t want you to get into the habit of treating me like glass, I’d hate that.”

When he said nothing in return, she kissed him again, and this time, he kissed her back, his arms easing their grip on her, hands lowering to grab her bum. She moaned softly, smiling against his lips.

Matty hovered over her, now naked, body dipping his head to leave gentle kisses all over her.

“Stunning, you are.” He kissed the space between her breasts; her eyes fluttered shut. “Perfect.” He kissed her a little lower this time. “Gorgeous.” He was halfway to her belly button. Her hands naturally moved to hold his curls between them, her breathing quick and shallow, more desperate the closer that he got to her core.

“So good for me,” he mumbled against her skin, his breath raising goosebumps all over her, which did not go unnoticed by Matty.

He grinned, reveling in his power over her body. “Gonna make you feel so good, darlin,’ I promise.”

“Oh, Matty…” she whined, “please do.” Her neck strained against the pillow; her entire body jolting when she felt Matty’s mouth, suddenly, at her clit. “Fuckkk! Yeah….”

Matty growled, smiling to himself. He forbade his other senses from feeling anything but her. His eyes shut, his ears focused only on her melodious sounds. A zealous worshipper, every breath he drew was all her, taking breaks only to kiss and nib the insides of her thighs, his armpinning her down, firmly, as she writhed and shook. Not even her reflexive pulls at his hair could deter him. He was determined to give all of himself to her.

“Sorry, erm…” he smiled, shyly. “Condom.”

She felt his sudden absence sorely, whining out and calling for him to hurry back.

“I know, I know. Sorry, love.”

She heard him wince and shuffle onto the bed and knew that he was back.

“You ready for me?”

“Mhm, please, please, I need you.”

Matty had to restrain himself from instantly pulling her into his arms to ravage his insatiable lust for her, reminding himself that he wanted this to be gentle, soft, precise, slow.

She felt the slow pressure and opened her eyes to watch him throw his head back in pleasure, a long and drawn out moan leaving his lips.

“Fuuuuckkk mee- Amelia. So, fffuckin good. So tight.”

Matty’s chest rose and fell rapidly as he began to thrust into her, soon finding his rhythm. Once he’d given himself a moment to adjust, his finger was back on her clit, gently stroking it the way he knows she needed.

“Ohhh my god, Matty…” she whimpered.

“I know, my love. I’ve got you.” He leaned forward, taking her hands in his and intertwining their fingers together. He laid on top of her, his chest pressed into hers with the full weight of his body.

“You feel s-so good.” He cried out, the overwhelming pleasure bringing tears to her eyes.

Matty kissing and sucking at the skin underneath her ear put her over the edge. She gasped, incoherently repeating “I- I’m gonna- cum…but it’s - it’s too much.”

“It’s okay, it’s okay. I’ve got you, darlin. Let go, it’s gonna feel g- oh my god- good.”

He felt both her hands squeeze his tightly and knew that she wouldn’t hold on much longer.

With a loud cry of his name, she gasped sweetly into his ear, and he felt her clench and gush around him, trembling as she came undone.

Matty himself couldn’t hold on for much either, her squeezing him tightly through her orgasm, sent his own waves of pleasure on the heels of hers, his head falling to her shoulder, he moaned softly, his eyelashes tickling her skin.

Matty thought he’d heard her whisper “I love you” into his ear as the rush of excitement flooded his mind.

***

Neither of them had the heart to be the one to pull away first, so they remained in that intermingled state, basking in the afterglow of that release, nothing but the hot air, and their rapid breathing mellowing out, in the room around them.

Amelia swallowed harshly, her mouth feeling dry even as her body glistened with hers and Matty’s sweat.

“I love you.” She said more clearly this time.

He couldn’t have mistaken her words this time. And if he had any doubt at all, the feeling of her heart beating furiously against his, after it had just calmed down, was unmistakable.

Matty remained perfectly still, his mind blank. It was it racing so quickly that it was impossible to hold onto any thought? He couldn’t tell the difference.

“Matty? I love you.” Amelia spoke again, helpless to stop herself. Now that it was spilling out of her, it was as if the floodgates had opened. She loves him. She loves him. She loves him….

#matty healy fanfiction #matty healy fanfic #matty healy smut #matty healy fluff #matty healy angst #matty healy x y/n #matty healy x oc #matty healy x you #matty healy x reader

[theywhowriteandknowthings]

The Princess And the Duke | Chapter 10: Pandemonium

Summary: Things go from bad, to worse, to utter pandemonium Word Count: 7k Warnings: strained family relationships, abusive parent, threats of physical harm, abuse, mild violence, language, strained friendships, violence, gun violence, stalking, pining, angst. Author's Notes: We're almost at the end! There will be an epilogue (or 6?) after the final chapter is done, but the journey is reaching it's end friends. Two more chapters to go, will The Princess and The Duke get their happily ever after? Co-written by the marvellous @angelofsmalldeath-codeine Follow @vi-notifs and consider buying me a coffee if you enjoy my work! AO3

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The smell of coffee lures you awake. You open your eyes to find the light from your windows muted by a sheet over your face. You frown, still weary with sleep as you try and gain your bearings.

The sound of your cupboards opening and closing beyond your bedroom door makes you freeze, there’s someone in your apartment. The sound of someone humming a tune carries through the door and it hits you.

Dave.

You wrestle yourself out of your sheets and check your phone, it’s almost ten in the morning and you rub your jaw as you check through your messages. Multiple missed calls from both Pete and Ash, your group chat has been renamed a few times, ranging from “Bitch, are you alive?” to “Please contact us, babe.”. You scroll through the messages before typing a response.

You: I’m fine, Nancy’s in jail. I’m safe, Dave slept on the couch cuz the door’s busted. Don’t say a word, Pete. I’ll keep you posted. Please don’t come over, I need space. I mean it.

You watch as both of them start to type, the little bubble appearing next to both of their names. You throw the phone onto the bed before heading to the bathroom. You shower and get dressed; you hold Dave’s hoodie in your hands for a moment. It still smells like him, at least you think it does. You decide against it, you stuff it under your comforter before pulling on a plain black one instead.

“Dave?” You call through the door as you hover over the doorknob.

“In the kitchen,” Dave calls back through the apartment and your heart twists at the sound of his voice, at the thought of him making you coffee in your kitchen.

Before you can lose yourself to the fantasy of domesticity with Dave, you break the spell. You pull the door open and it’s worse, so much worse. He’s there, hair dishevelled as he stands with his back to you. His dress shirt is creased, sleeves rolled up to the elbow as he works the coffee machine. His tight slacks hug his pert ass too well and you want nothing more than to walk up and wrap yourself around him from behind.

“Morning,” you say meekly as you remember how he stopped you from taking things further last night. You want to tell yourself it wasn’t a true rejection, you felt it in the way he kissed back, you want to believe that he was as desperate as you. But the moment he turns to look at you, your heart shatters.

“Morning,” he responds, his voice low as he glances at you for a second over his shoulder before turning back to the coffee machine.

“You don’t have to stick around,” you say as you linger in the doorway, “I can handle the maintenance guy, it’s fine.”

“I promised I’d stay and help,” Dave says as he turns around, two mugs of coffee in his hands.

“I don’t want to keep you, I’ll be fine,” you say a little firmer this time, you can feel the grief welling up in you as he looks at you. His expression is cold, so neutral it can’t be anything but a practiced mask.

“If you’re not comfortable with me being here, I can go,” Dave says as you notice his jaw tick to the side a little, “I’ve already called the security firm and their guy is on the way.”

“That would probably be for the best,” you say as your voice breaks, “Thank you.”

“If you need anything, just call,” Dave says as his mask slips, his shoulders sag and he looks at you, dark eyes betraying the sadness behind the mask.

“I will,” you confirm as you force a smile, you want to say more but you know if you do you’ll probably cry.

Dave nods curtly before placing your coffee mug on the counter, he drains his own with a grimace. It’s clearly too hot to have done that comfortably. He lingers for a moment before striding over to the door. He has to force it open; the doorframe so badly damaged it really did have to be jammed shut last night. He pauses, looking as if he wants to say something else, but ultimately decides against it, flashing you a sad smile before disappearing into the hallway.

You pick the mug up from the counter, taking a tentative sip of the hot liquid before retrieving your phone from the bedroom along with your laptop. You settle down against the armrest of the loveseat before emailing the Bar admissions office.

It’s going to be a long day of explanations, citing police reports, and endless email chains to get your application back on track.

~*~

Dave lets out a frustrated sigh as he sits back in his desk chair, glaring at Resnik as the smaller man seems to shrink away from Dave’s scathing gaze. It’s Friday morning, two days since Nancy decided to break into your apartment. Two days since he’s heard from his subordinate that should have been checking in at hourly intervals.

Furious doesn’t come close to describing what Dave is feeling right now.  

“So,” Dave says calmly, “Do you want to explain yourself?”

“I was just getting some more pictures, you know, surveillance and all that,” Resnik splutters as his beady eyes flit to the blinking light of the card reader attached to Dave’s PC.

“Surveillance?” Dave repeats as he turns one of his monitors around aggressively to face his subordinate, “What were you surveilling here, Resnik? Huh?”

Resnik squirms as he’s forced to look at the pin-sharp image of you bending over in yoga pants. It’s from the start of your run with Pete yesterday, there’s no mistaking what Resnik’s lens was trained on.

“I fucked up, boss,” Resnik says as he aggressively scrapes his fingers against his chin, unable to offer any other excuse than that.

“Fucking pathetic,” Dave snarls as he turns the monitor back around, “You’re off the PI job, Ari’s taking over, get out of my sight.”

“But-,” Resnik starts to protest but Dave shoots him a look, his dark eyes flashing with rage like nothing Resnik has ever seen. He opens and closes his mouth a few times before scurrying out of the office.

Dave pinches the bridge of his nose as he counts back from twenty in his head. The stress of the target, of Nancy’s freshly served divorce papers on his desk, and your safety is wearing him thin. The only thing keeping him sane is the knowledge that you’re safe, for now.

He picks up his cell phone and dials Kovac’s number, it rings twice before Kovac’s gruff voice sounds in his ear.

“Maintenance guy just left, fucker wouldn’t paint the new doorframe,” Kovac grumbles without so much as a word of greeting. Dave likes that about Kovac, no bullshit.

“Noted, I’ll sort something out,” Dave says, hoping he can smooth things over with you soon, “Let me know when you’re done.”

“Yes, boss,” Kovac says flatly before ending the call.

Dave spends the next few hours looking over the CCTV footage from the chase. Scrubbing back through minute by minute as he tries to find where the target slipped away. He’s been reviewing the footage obsessively. Practically not moving from his chair and barely eating. He tells himself it’s just the job, but he knows some of it has to do with you. The way you looked when he rejected you is burned into his brain. It haunts him to know he hurt you, even if he knows it was the right thing to do.

His stomach gurgles, snapping him out of his thought spiral and he sighs. Having skipped breakfast and now, lunch it seems, Dave is ravenous. He’s about to give up and get something from the break room vending machine when he sees it. Something he hadn’t caught before.

The flash of police cars in the background of one of the final moments of footage before they lost the target. Something worries at the back of Dave’s mind as he brings up a map of the area on his other monitor.

“Son of a bitch,” Dave curses as he brings up the CCTV footage from outside your building. He watches in horror as a lone figure makes his way into the frame. The dark-haired man lingers at the edge of the taped off crime scene, Nancy is being hauled out unconscious as the target lifts his head up and looks directly into the lens of the camera.

Dave scrambles to pick up his phone, desperately trying to get through to you, but each time it goes to voicemail.

“Fuck!” He roars into the empty room as he throws his phone down.

He has to calm down, there’s no guarantee the target was there for you. It has to be a coincidence, there’s no way there’s a target on your back. He settles back into his chair, hunger forgotten as bile rises in his throat. He continues to watch the recording, hoping beyond hope that the target moves on when Nancy is carted off.

The police car leaves the scene and Dave’s jaw goes tense as he watches the next thirty minutes play out. He watches as he arrives at the apartment, the target stays exactly where he has been the whole recording. Waiting.

To Dave’s dismay, it’s only when he watches the recording of him escorting you out and away from the scene that the target leaves. There’s no mistaking it now.

You’re in danger.

~*~

The small hole-in-the-wall establishment is quiet as you drum your fingers on the top of the lacquered bar. You scroll through your phone as you wait for Ash and Pete to arrive. You’re already regretting the decision to call Ash. It’s too soon, you’re too angry with them both. You tip back the last of your whiskey as you check your phone for any new messages. Nothing.

The last two days have dragged, you’ve barely left your bed. The moment the security guy had left, you’d locked up and shut down all your devices. Between crying and sleeping far too much, you made the decision to meet with Ash and Pete.

You’re about to leave when you notice a fresh drink being placed in front of you. You look up to the bartender who points to the other end of the bar.

“Gentleman insisted,” he says with a smile before being called over by another patron.

You turn to look at your admirer and you smile politely at the man. He’s a little older than you, around Dave’s age if you had to guess. He’s well dressed in tight black slacks and a loose fit white shirt. His buttons are undone to expose the cleft of his pecs, there’s a smattering of dark hair there that makes your stomach flutter. He has a kind face, dark green eyes that sparkle in the low light of the bar. His dark hair is short and parted to the side.

“Thanks,” you say with a kind smile, “But I don’t take drinks from strangers.”

The man smiles wider at this, nodding knowingly.

“Smart, I don’t blame you,” he says with a dazzling smile, “You just looked like you needed a pick-me-up.”

“That obvious, huh?” You say with a grimace as you turn on your stool to face him.

“Not obvious per se,” he says as he takes a sip from his drink, “But I had a hunch, what with you being here all alone. Mind if I join you?”

“Not alone, just painfully early for friends who are notoriously late,” you say with a snort as you hail the bartender.

“Sounds like you need better friends,” he says with a raised brow as takes a seat next to you, “Making a gorgeous woman like you wait seems like a crime.”

“You flatter me,” you say as you feel the praise prickle pleasantly under your skin, “But they’re good people.”

The conversation lulls but you can feel the stranger’s eyes on you as you scroll through your phone. You’re browsing reels on Instagram when you feel a pair of arms grab you from behind. You panic, shoving back as you practically catapult yourself off the stool. You scramble to your feet and back away from the bar with wild eyes. You’re ready to swing at your assailant, adrenaline pumping through your veins.

“What the fuck?” Ash’s familiar voice snaps you out of your haze. You look up to see Ash and Pete looking at you in horror.

“Jesus, Ash!” you say with a heavy sigh of relief, “Don’t sneak up on me like that.”

You notice the smirk on the stranger’s face as you scold your friends. There’s something else simmering under the surface there, but you’re not paying attention to him anymore. You’re smoothing down your pants as you look at your friends.

“You, ok?” Ash asks as she looks you up and down, no doubt she can see the way your shoulders slump and your eyes are glassy and bloodshot. Pete gives you a sheepish smile.

“Not really, come on, let’s get a table,” you say as you gesture further into the bar. As you turn, you hear the sound of a phone camera shuttering, but you dismiss it.

The three of you sit down in a booth, Pete and Ash taking their place opposite you. If it hadn’t already felt like an intervention, it does now. A waitress comes over and takes your drinks order before leaving the three of you alone once more.

“I see you’re really leaning into the sugar daddy angle,” Pete remarks as you take your seat, nodding towards the guy at the bar. Your jaw ticks to the side as you ignore him, Ash shoots him a look and you feel a little less tense seeing her on your side.

“Thanks for meeting with us,” Ash says, “How are you doing?”

“Not bad considering my mother broke into my apartment and threatened me with a hammer, whilst demanding I admit I was fucking Dave,” you say with a shrug, too tired to beat around the bush.

“She did what?” Ash asks incredulously, “Why didn’t you call us?”

“Because after Wednesday I wasn’t sure I’d get the support I needed, let alone that you’d take my side on it. Somehow it would have to be my fault, right?” You say, the venom dripping from your tongue, and you look at them both in turn.

“You know we wouldn’t have pinned that on you,” Ash pleads but you shake your head slowly at her.

“Do I? The last few weeks have me questioning everything, Ash,” you sigh as you see your phone screen light up. You grit your teeth as you see it’s a message from Dave. Pete’s eyes flick to the screen and you’re grateful for the nickname attached to Dave’s contact.

“That’s not fair, we’re just worried about you,” Ash argues but you turn your gaze to Pete.

“Is that what Wednesday was, Pete? Concern? Because it seemed like it was all about judging me, not being concerned about my wellbeing.”

“I was concerned, the man was able to track you down on our night out. Ash told me he kept hounding you even after she took you home after that too.”

“He wasn’t hounding me,” you say as the hair on the back of your neck stands up, “He texted me once to make sure I was ok.”

“He’s creepy, babe, he’s your goddamn stepdad, and you are fucking him,” Pete says with a scowl, and you notice Ash flinch next to him. 

Your blood runs cold as you realise Ash has been talking to Pete about everything behind your back. You wonder how much she’s told him. It makes you feel sick, for all Pete’s judgement and scorn, you have always been able to confide in Ash. Or so you thought.

“You told him?” You look to Ash, your heart breaking for what feels like the hundredth time this week, “Ash, I told you about that in confidence, next you’re going to reveal you gave Nancy my address,” you scoff, but the look of shame on Ash’s face gives you pause, “You didn’t? Did you?”

“Of course not!” Ash blurts as her eyes go wide, “I only talked to Pete because I was worried about you, I’d never do that to you.” Ash says as she holds her hands up in a show of surrender.

“And yet you told Pete, behind my back,” you retort, the hum of adrenaline in your veins makes you twitchy as you look to Pete. He physically shrinks back as he meets your gaze.

“Is this why you went so hard at me on Wednesday? What gave you the right to ambush me like that?” You ask incredulously.

“You’re not known for making good choices with men, hun,” Pete argues meekly, and you have to bite your tongue, “I was just trying to make you see how fucked up this is.”

“That’s rich coming from you, Pete,” you scoff as you shake your head, “I’m not the one proposing to a guy that ‘drives me crazy’,” you emphasise the phrase with air quotes, “Because he doesn’t answer your every obsessive text and call. Can you not see the irony there?”

Pete opens and closes his mouth a few times before scowling at you. Ash is looking at her hands, her shoulders slumped, and you almost feel bad for her. Almost.

“So, which one of you decided to go full-Nancy and pull this intervention type stunt, huh?”

“That’s not what this is-,” Ash starts, her eyes wet with tears as she looks at you.

“Then what is it? Tell me, because I certainly don’t see it as anything else.”

You sit there for a moment, desperately trying to process everything as neither of them come up with an answer for you. You see your phone light up again and you snatch it up before standing. Something is wrong if Dave is messaging you now, there’s no other reason for him to break his promise to give you space. You’re once again reminded that Dave seems to be the only who never violates your boundaries.

“Where are you going?” Ash asks as her eyes plead with you.

“To the bathroom,” you snap as you meet her gaze with a stern look, “Is that ok? Or do I need your permission to pee?”

She shakes her head, looking down as the drinks arrive and the waitress obscures you from them both. You stride towards the bathroom and pull out your phone, ducking into a stall and locking it behind you.

Your eyes go wide as you see multiple missed calls from Dave, accompanied with a string of texts that make your blood run cold.

Duke 🎷: Get out.

Duke 🎷: Please, get out of there.

Duke 🎷: * Duke 🎷* sent a photo.

You open up the attachment and you see the back of your head as you walk over to Ash and Pete at the booth. There’s a banner caption on the bottom half of the image that makes your blood run cold.

“She’s beautiful, shame if anything would happen to her.”

You clap your hand over your mouth to stifle a cry as you realise the man at the bar had taken a photo of you. You slump back against the stall as you try and collect yourself. Your phone rings once more and you answer without hesitation.

“Dave?” You whisper, your voice faltering as you fight the urge to cry.

“Are you ok? Has he hurt you?” Dave’s voice is frantic on the other end of the call, which only makes your heart beat faster; it only cements the fact that you’re in serious danger.

“No, he tried to buy me a drink, I didn’t take it,” you say as you clutch the phone tightly in your hand, desperately trying to stay calm.

“I think you understand who that is right? Yes or no answers only, we can’t trust the line with specifics, ok?”

“Ok. Yes, I do, I understand who he is.”

“I need you to slip out the back,” Dave’s voice has lowered, adopting a calmer tone as he takes you through the next steps, “I’m in a silver sedan one street over, don’t run, but I need to get you out of there now. Do you understand?”

You nod, forgetting for a moment that Dave can’t see you.

“Hey?” Dave says your name and it’s like a slap to the face.  

The name jolts you back to the present and the sound of the bar outside the bathroom fills your ears as you take a steadying breath. Your heart is hammering in your chest as you force yourself to focus.

“I’m here, I’m on my way,” Your voice is more level than you expected, and you slowly make your way out of the stall, “Stay on the line?” You ask as you slip towards the back door of the bar.

“Of course, I’m here.”

You keep your eyes fixed on the bar as you walk backwards out of the bar, you feel the push bar of the back door on your palm as you hold the phone to your ear with your other hand. You hear Dave hiss on the other line as you watch the stranger chuckle to himself at the bar.

“What?” You ask, morbidly curious to what the stranger had clearly sent to Dave.

“He’s sent me another photo of you, just get out of there, ok?”

You lean back slowly, depressing the bar as gently as possible, there’s a small voice in the back of your mind hoping the door isn’t alarmed. The soft clunk of the door opening luckily isn’t loud enough to reach the bar, but the moment you’re across the threshold a siren sounds loud in the street behind you.

The stranger’s eyes flick up at the sudden sound and his glowers at you as he immediately launches himself in your direction. You slam the door behind you, heart in your throat as you try and remember where Dave said he was.

“Dave, where are you? He caught me leaving, he’s coming.”

“Turn right out of the alley, I’m waiting on the street. Go!” Dave barks as you hear an engine roar to life.

You break into a sprint, thanking your foresight to choose flats instead of heels tonight. You her the slam of the door crashing into the alley wall behind you, but you don’t turn back. You hear an angry shout behind you, and you almost pitch forward onto your face as you hear the gunshot that follows, so close behind you.

“Are you ok? Where are you?” Dave’s voice is frantic in your ear as you break out onto the street.

“I’m ok. I see the car,” you pant as you charge towards the silver sedan idling at the curb. You yank the door open, checking at the last moment that it is actually Dave in the car. His dark eyes are blazing with emotion as he checks you over briefly before driving off.

“I heard the gunshot, were you hit?” Dave asks as he focuses on the road ahead, eyes flicking back and forth as he scans for any apparent danger.

“I don’t think so,” you say with a shaky breath as you tentatively scan your body, hands drifting over your torso as you confirm, “I’m ok.”

“Good,” Dave says with a grunt as he cuts off a semi-truck. His shoulders are tense as he drives, his jaw is tight, and his knuckles are white from exertion from gripping the wheel so hard.

You slump back into your seat, your body buzzing with unspent energy as the adrenaline high courses through you. You sit in silence for a while as you watch Dave wind through the streets of Austin. You realise too late that he’s already overshot your apartment building by a few blocks. You’re heading out of town.

“I didn’t know you were in the bar,” Dave says through clenched teeth as he pulls the car into a parking garage a few blocks over from your place, “Not until he sent the photo.”

You furrow your brow, trying to understand what he means.

“Dave, what are you-?”

“I wasn’t following you, I wanted to give you space. I’m sorry but he forced my hand,” Dave turns to you with anguish behind his dark eyes.

It’s only then your brain catches up through the fog of adrenaline and fear. You remember that you pushed him away, needed him to give you space after he rejected you.

“I understand,” you say as you look away, the bitter sting of rejection burning under your skin once more as you replay the way he stopped your advances.

“Where are we going?” You ask as you realise you’re on the I35 out of Austin.

“Your apartment isn’t safe, the only place I can keep you safe is back home,” Dave says, and you can hear the agitation in his voice. You’ve never seen Dave like this, he’s so utterly unflappable, but now, it’s painful to see him so panicked.

“Home,” you nod, gathering yourself for a moment before slumping back down in the seat. The word rolls around your mind like a marble, rattling around as you try and gather your thoughts.

Neither of you say another word until you’re pulling up into a hauntingly similar parody of the day Dave brought you home from the airport all those months ago. An empty garage, no cherry red Escalade, but no red mustang either. It’s eerie.

Dave hovers at your elbow, head on a swivel, as he closes the garage door. He guides you down into the basement, hovering behind you, but not quite touching you as you descend the steps. The moment your feet hit the bottom step, it’s like a switch flips.

Tears come unbidden as you feel your knees go weak. You hear the sound of Dave arming a security system in the background as you feel the floor shift from under you. You fall to your knees and sob, your chest constricting in waves as you let out the frustrations of the last few months.

You hear the heavy thud of Dave’s knees hitting the floor next to you, followed by a barely concealed hiss.

“Hey,” his voice is low, soothing as you feel him hovering next to you, but he doesn’t touch you, he keeps his distance as you sob, “I’m here.”

But you don’t want him to keep his distance, you’re tired of the distance between you. You look up with bleary eyes and it takes you less than a second to close the gap between your bodies. You wrap your arms around him, awkwardly clinging to his kneeling form as you cry into his shirt.

“I hate you,” you sob, “I fucking hate you.”

Dave stiffens beneath you for a moment before wrapping his strong arms around you, pulling you tight against him as you choke through your anger.

“Do you know what it’s like, Dave? To be so sure of something that it physically hurts when you can’t do anything about it?” You ask, it’s rhetorical, and he knows it, so he only holds you tighter.

“I did everything right. I kept my distance, I tried to forget about you, forget about us, but I can’t Dave.”

“I know,” he whispers and something about his admission – his honesty – breaks something inside you.

“I can’t keep doing this, Dave,” you say as you pull back enough to look up into his eyes, they shine with tears as they regard you with something akin to remorse, “I can’t keep loving you if it means that all I do is hurt.”

“I know,” he repeats, a single tear tracking down his face as he tries to blink them away.

“I wish I had stayed in New York,” you snap, it’s cold and you don’t really mean it, but there’s a grain of truth to it, “I would have been miserable, but I wouldn’t have this hole in my chest. I wouldn’t have fallen so hard for someone I can never have.”

Dave doesn’t say anything to that, tears falling freely now as he bows his head.

“Did I ever actually mean anything to you? Beyond being collateral damage and sex?” You ask, it’s an unfair question but nothing about this is fair anymore. It’s never been fair to you.

“Of course, you did, you still do,” Dave says solemnly as he meets your gaze, “I love you.”

It’s like time stands still as you look up into his eyes, they glitter with more tears as he brings a hand up to cup your cheek. You lean in without hesitation as you search his face for any hint of deception.

“You mean that?” You say, voice barely more than a whisper as you plead with whatever deity that is listening that this isn’t some sick joke.

“I’ve loved you for some time,” Dave says with a sad smile, “I can’t keep pretending I don’t, it’s killing me.”

“It’s been killing me too,” you say as you place your hand over Dave’s holding his hand against your cheek, “But why tell me now? What changed?”

“You mean the hitman coming after you notwithstanding?” Dave allows himself to laugh bitterly at that and you can’t help but smile, “Nancy filed for divorce from prison, got her lawyer to serve me papers this morning.”

“You’re joking?” You laugh, a genuine, throaty bark of a sound as you shake your head, “She really thinks she’s got it all figured out, doesn’t she?”

“Hubris, thy name is Nancy,” Dave says with a sigh, “Once this is all over, once the threat on your life has been neutralised, we will have time to talk this over, talk about us, about what you want.”

“I want you,” you say without hesitation and the way Dave’s lips curve up makes your heart clench, “I will always want you.”

“I want to hold you to that,” Dave says as he leans forward and presses his forehead to yours once more, the contact makes you shudder, “But we can’t rush this, you can’t rush this. Once we’re on the other side of this, and once the divorce is finalised, we can do this right.”

“Ok,” you say, disappointment poisoning the moment just enough to make you focus on the danger at hand, “But I mean it, Dave,” you say as you pull back to look up into his eyes once more, “I love you.”

“I love you too,” he says, and you see the flicker of emotion in his eyes, the way they dart to your lips for a brief moment.

“Can I kiss you?” You ask, preparing yourself for rejection, but it doesn’t come.

Dave leans down, his lips slotting over yours as his hand moves from your cheek to the back of your head. You sigh as you melt into the kiss. You fist the collar of Dave’s shirt as you lean into him.

It’s different from the other night, his lips pull gently at your own as you feel the stirring of something more than lust or desire in your chest. You stifle a soft whine as he pulls your bottom lip between his own. Heat flares in your core as you savour the heat of his mouth on yours.

You pull back, fire coursing under your skin as you look up into the warmth of Dave’s gaze. You’re both smiling, Dave’s cheeks are dimpling, and you lean forward to kiss him again.

The sound of the doorbell jolts you both out of the moment and you look at Dave with wide eyes.

“It’s ok, it’s Kovac, one of my trusted colleagues, and friends. He’s here to look after you for a while,” Dave explains, a blush creeping over his face as he realises, he didn’t fill you in on the plan.

“How long is a while?”

“A few days,” Dave says as he places his hands over yours as they cling to his shirt, “A week at most, I promise.”

“You’re going to kill him, the guy from the bar. Aren’t you?” The question slips from your lips effortlessly, you’re not naïve. You’ve noticed the absence of police presence; the way Dave hasn’t so much as called anything in since you left the bar. None of it was above board, you just know it.

“Yes,” he says, his face hardening a little as he meets your gaze, “This isn’t something that will go away if he’s put behind bars.”

“Then finish it.”

Dave’s eyes go wide at the conviction in your voice, but whatever he’s about to say in response is cut off by the furious buzzing of his cell in his pocket. He answers it with a snarl.

“Kovac, I’m coming, let yourself in,” he barks down the phone before ending the call.

Silently he eases himself onto his feet, a groan escapes him as one of his knees makes a nauseating pop. He holds his hand out to you, and you take it, letting him pull you up onto your feet.

“You have to stay down here, no matter what, ok?” Dave says as he looks over his shoulder at the basement stairs.

“What about-,” you begin to protest, you’ve got nothing of value on you, no laptop, no clothes.

“Ari, one of my other guys,” Dave interrupts, “Has a go bag for you, he’ll drop it off with your laptop and other essentials later this afternoon. Take anything you need from my drawers, use the bathroom, whatever you need, it’s yours.”

You bristle a little at the way you feel like you’re being handled, but you realise that’s exactly what’s happening. You’re an asset to be protected, there’s a very real danger out there wishing you harm.

“I’ll check in regularly, and Kovac will do anything for you, I mean it. I trust most of my men with my own life, but I wouldn’t trust anyone but Kovac to protect you.”

“Fine,” you say, trying to quash the petulance bubbling beneath the surface, “But Dave?”

“What?”

“Come back to me.”

It’s not a request, he knows it too well, but he pulls you against his chest, holding you tight.

“Nothing on this earth will stop me coming back to you,” he breathes as he presses a soft kiss to the crown of your head.

“I’ll hold you to that,” you say as you bury your face in his chest before reluctantly easing out of his embrace as you hear heavy footsteps on the stairs. You look up to see the same hulking man who fitted your security alarm.

“Dave, that’s-?”

“I told you,” he says with a sly smile, “I wouldn’t trust anyone else to keep you safe.”

You look to Kovac, and he shrugs, his face set in a smug smile as he and Dave give each other a nod of acknowledgment. Your heart flutters at the interaction, a weight lifting from your shoulders as you realise the extent of Dave’s commitment to keeping you safe.

~*~

A few hours later, Kovac answers the door as you’re sat on the L-shaped sofa in the basement. A rerun of ‘Parks and Rec’ is playing on the TV but you’re not really watching, until Duke Silver appears on screen, and you can’t help but smile.

There’s a poisoned irony at the way your group chat with Ash and Pete keeps blowing up, asking you if you’d gone home with the DILF at the bar. But you’re too dazed to care, you’ve muted the chat now, instead staring into the middle distance as you try and bring yourself back to the present.  

“Hey,” Kovac’s low rumble startles you as he rounds the sofa with a duffel bag on one arm, a plastic bag filled with takeout containers in his other hand, “Ari brought your laptop and some other stuff, Dave ordered takeout and some beer.”

“Thanks,” you say with a weak smile, “I’ll sort the bag later, just dump it on the sofa.”

“Sure,” Kovac does as he’s told, dropping the bag gently on the sofa cushion before setting the plastic bag on the coffee table. He goes to leave straight away, and you stop him.

“There’s way too much food here. Do you want to join me?”

Kovac hesitates for a moment before shrugging and taking a seat on the floor opposite you. You smirk at the gesture but don’t say anything as you start to unbox the food and Kovac pops a beer and offers it to you. The two of you eat in silence for some time.

“So, you and Dave,” you say, curiosity getting the better of you, “How’d you two meet?”

Kovac chews slowly for a moment, as if contemplating how much he can actually say.

“Marines,” he says as he takes a swig of beer, “Served with him from start to finish, good man.”

“He is,” you say absently as you watch the credits roll for the episode and you immediately skip to the next one, “Thanks for staying and eating with me,” you say as you drain the last of your beer, “I appreciate it.”

Kovac shrugs and continues eating without missing a beat as he eyes you up and down.

“It won’t be long before you’re out of here,” he says as he gestures around the basement with his free hand, “Dave doesn’t fuck around when it comes to people he cares about.”

The statement, no matter how crude, has your chest constricting with joy. Of course, you want to believe that Dave cares about you – that he loves you – but to hear it from Kovac is vindicating. It makes everything feel a little more real.

“I don’t doubt it,” you say as neutrally as possible as your lips curve up into a smile.

You sit in silence for the rest of the meal until Kovac excuses himself, taking the dirty dishes and takeaway containers upstairs. He refuses to let you help, assuring you it’s safer if you stay in the basement.

You’re suddenly very tired, the events of the day catching up to you finally. You give your armpits a tentative sniff and grimace at the smell. You haul yourself up from the sofa and shower.

By the time you’re showered and dressed in a pair of Dave’s sweatpants and one of his hoodies, Kovac is back. He sits on the sofa, watching you re-enter with an unreadable look on his face.

“Sit,” he says as you approach the opposite end of the sofa to him. There’s an object on the coffee table, covered in a cloth and you realise immediately what it is.

“Is there a reason you’re looming menacingly over a gun?” You ask, trying to ease the tension in your gut with a bit of levity.

“Dave asked me to give it to you,” Kovac says bluntly, “You know how to use it?”

He unfolds the cloth to reveal a silver Colt 1911 and you nod slowly, already reaching for the pistol.

“I grew up in Texas,” you say with a shrug as you inspect the utilitarian firearm, “I’ve handled bigger and meaner guns than this in my time.”

“Good,” Kovac nods, “Have you ever shot someone?”

The question throws you a little and you slowly shake your head.

“I’ve never had to.” You say.

“I hope that doesn’t change,” Kovac says solemnly, and you look up to see a flash of emotion in his blue eyes, something like remorse, “But if you need to, don’t hesitate, not even for a second.”

You eject the magazine and pull back the slider to expose the breech. You nod slowly to yourself, the whole process something second-nature to you normally. The threat looming over you makes everything feel surreal, disjointed.

“I promise,” you say as you depress the slide release and re-insert the magazine before flicking the safety on, “Thank you.”

Kovac simply nods, seemingly happy with your reaction before he stands and makes his way to the stairs.

“I’m going to keep watch upstairs, I hope you get some rest,” he says without turning before ascending the stairs.

“Night,” you call after him absently as you turn back to the television. Parks and Rec is still playing but you aren’t in the mood to mindlessly watch TV. You turn it off and head into Dave’s bedroom.

You place the gun on the nightstand, the cold thud of the metal on the wood surface loud in your ears. You slide under the sheets, and for a brief moment you’re lost in the familiar scent of Dave. The fresh, spiced smell of his body wash and the unique musk of simply him envelop you as you burrow into the sheets. Your eyes flutter closed, and you let out a soft sigh as you try and relax.

It could have been seconds, or hours since you closed your eyes when suddenly you’re jolted awake by the harsh blaring of an alarm. You check your phone, but the device lies silent, the display lights up as you move it, it’s just gone 4am.

You blink away the sleep as you see Dave’s desktop PC screens flashing violently, red and white as an emergency alarm blares through his speakers. Your stomach drops as the CCTV feed pops up in a new window.

There, on the doorstep – gun in hand – is the man from the bar, smiling up into the camera lens.

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#The Princess and The Duke #TPATD #Dave York Fanfiction #Equalizer 2 #The Equalizer #reader insert #x reader #Dave York fic #Dave York fanfic #pedro pascal characters #pedro pascal character #pedro pascal character fic #Dave York x Reader #Dave York x OC #Dave York x OFC #Dave York Apologist #Dave York did nothing wrong #Dave York Pit #pedro pascal #fanfic #ao3 fanfic #dave york #theywhowriteandknowthings #vi writes

[rinsaint]

hi! (idk if ur accepting requests rn-sorry 🥲) i would like to request part 3 of the pervy haikyuu boys with bokuto, tendou, oikawa, & mattsun! (IDK HOW MANY U DO SORRY ;-; ) (also i really like ur writing style, its really good<3)

ft. bokuto, mattsun, oikawa !! part 1 part 2

cw. Oblivious reader, dirty thoughts, nonconsensual, anal, peeking under readers skirt, jerking off to readers photos, stealing readers panties, breeding, blowjob, coming in mouth, teasing !!

BOKUTO: Bokuto is known to be innocent and naive. And you bet he uses that to advantage. Slinging his arm around your shoulder and ‘accidentally’ brushing his finger tips against your tits. He gives you a smile and apologizes but really, he isn’t sorry. He would give anything to feel your tits in his hands. To play and suck on them. To pinch your harden buds and to hear your moans slipping past your lips. If your back is feeling tense, expect him to come to your aid! He would massage your back and occasionally would travel his hands down to your ass. Brushing his hands slightly against it. He loves to go out with you on windy days, mostly because when you wear that cute little short skirt of yours, he gets a glimpse of your pussy lips through your panties when the wind makes your skirt lift up. And you don’t question him walking behind you all the time because last time you did, he responded saying that he just wants to make sure you’re safe. But the only reason why is to look at your ass as you walk. Which leaves him imagining his cock slipping in and out of your ass, watching as you grip onto his bed sheets begging him for more.

MATTSUN: I have this huge feeling that he definitely jerks off to your photos. Like he seriously cannot get off without thinking about you or looking at pictures of you. this slick mf steals a bunch of your panties. And when i say a lot, a lot. You have to buy a new pair every week because it goes missing. He likes to put his cock against your panties when he jerks off. He likes to cum in them and he can’t help but think about filling you up, and when he’s done, make you put back on your panties and watch as you walk outside, his cum dripping onto your panties, down your legs. Everytime you suck on a lollipop he can’t help but imagine you sucking on his cock. Your spit dribbling down your mouth, as you engulf his thick and very long cock in your mouth. Gagging when his cock hits the back of your throat repeatedly. He definitely stares at your tits a lot. And he makes it so obvious too like he does not care if you catch him. Likes to take pictures of you. Again if you are wearing a skirt, and you two are out having dinner or lunch, he would take out his phone and snap a few pictures under the table of you. If you ask him to take pictures of you so you can post them, he definitely takes a few and zooms in and takes some pics of your tits and sends them to himself.

OIKAWA: This man is so freaking freaky. Doesn’t try to hide it either. He teases you a lot. Steals a bunch of your stuff. The first ever thing he stole from you was your chapstick. He would put it on at home and would moan because he’s basically indirectly kissing you. That is the very reason why he likes to share drinks with you. Sharing straws, spoons, ect. He would give anything to feel your soft lips against his. He likes being close to you a lot. Having his arm around your neck to feel against your breasts, having his arm against your waist to slightly brush the tip of his fingers against your private. He gets hard around you a lot. I mean, how could he not? The way you drink that bottle of water and the droplets drip down to your chin which leads to it being on your chest. It has him wishing it would be his cum dripping down your chin. Definitely jerks off to you. He can’t help it. You just look so fucking sexy he can’t help himself. When you go to the beach, god he gets painfully hard. The sight of you in your cute bikini or bathing suit has him clenching his jaw and his dick jumping through his trunks. He can’t help but put the towel over him and play with himself as he gives you a small wave as you continue to play in the water. And god, he feels like he can just come on the spot when you run to him telling him you’re gonna go to the bathroom. Your tits bouncing up and down. And he can see your harden nipples through it and it has him swallowing his spit.

#[ ☆ ] — anons !! #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu smut #haikyuu hcs #haikyu smut #haikyu x reader #bokuto drabble #bokuto smut #bokuto x reader #bokuto kotaro x reader #mattsun smut #mattsun x reader #matsuwaka x reader #matsuwaka smut #oikawa smut #oikawa x reader #oikawa x you #oikawa toru smut #oikawa toru x reader

[ejlovespie]

Uncomplicated

Pairing: Stefan Salvatore x fem!vampire!reader

Summary: Things get a little heated when you offer Stefan to drink from you… 

Words: 1.1K (This went a tad long for a drabble...whoops!)

Warnings / Tags: 18+ vampire biting & blood sharing / mild smut / touching / implied sex 

A/N: @akshi8278 Thank you for participating in this game of mine and thank you for following my blog and reading/sharing my work. You were one of my first followers when I started posting a few years ago and every time I see your handle come up, it makes me smile. <3 You have made a big impression on me and have pushed me to keep writing. I appreciate you so much and hope you like this little fic. :) xoxo -EJ 

P.S. This is my first Stefan fic *squeal!* I loved writing him! 

“I’m sorry, Y/N but no. Absolutely not.” Stefan is shaking his head at you, jaw tight and lips set in a firm, unhappy line.

You whine and put on the best, biggest, puppy-dog-eyed performance you have ever given and it's Oscar worthy because you’re desperate to get Stefan to agree. When he finally looks at you, his hazel eyes go dark as he shakes his head at you. Mentally digging in your heels, you hit him with the main point of your argument again. 

“Stef, please. It’s perfectly safe and you’ll get more drinking from me than you will with any innocent woodland creature. Plus, I’ve heard all the talk. A lot of vampires do this all the time and I really think this is your best option here. I'm just asking you to try it. Please?”  

Wearing dark jeans, boots, and a tan long-sleeved henley, your best friend is standing stiffer than his ‘hero hair.’ With the sleeves pushed up to his elbows, you try not to stare at his muscled arms crossed over his broad chest. Stubborn, you mimic his stance and stick out your bottom lip in a playful pout until he rolls his pretty eyes at you and drops his arms. You’re currently squaring off in the sitting room of the Salvatore house. If you could feel any fluctuation in temperature, you might shiver at the slight breeze coming in through the open window or warm from the heat coming off the fire in the harth. Stefan finally sits, his daylight ring glinting from the light of the fireplace as he pours both of you another drink. Accepting the offered glass, you study the bourbon decanter on the coffee table and take a sip. You both sit in tense silence for a long moment before you break it.

Your voice comes out softer than you mean it to when you ask, “Just tell me why. Why are you so dead-set against this? Why won’t you even try? Is it me? I know it’s kind of an..intimate thing but..would it really be that bad?” 

Stefan sighs. It’s prolonged and heavy with exasperation. Closing his eyes, he throws back the rest of his drink like it’s an Olympic sport before setting the glass down on the table in front of him.

Turning his body to face you, he says, “Y/N..you don’t know what you’re asking..what you’re offering. I know you’re trying to help but this could complicate our relationship. Blood sharing is..uh..personal and the others that do this all the time are couples.”

Heat creeps up your neck and cheeks from his low words and direct stare. You understood the implication of what he was saying but you didn’t care. Stefan’s health and wellbeing was more important to you than an awkward moment in your long-standing friendship. Making the decision to put him first, whether he saw it that way or not, you set your glass down before bringing your wrist to your mouth. Stefan begins to argue again but you ignore his protests as your fangs elongate and you bite into the vein inside your wrist. Looking at Stefan, you hold it out to him and wait. Your chest tightens at the sallowness in his skin and the sunken, purple bruises under his eyes. Guilt sours your stomach. You waited too long, let him starve himself too much before finally gaining enough courage to offer this to him.

With parted lips, Stefan stares at the small trail of bright red blood dripping from the wound on your wrist down your extended arm. After a moment, a soft sound escapes his throat and his eyes begin to shift from human to predator.

Scooting closer to him on the couch, you bring your bleeding wrist a little closer to his face and murmur, “Stop fighting me. Please, just take it. I’m a vampire, not a human. You’ll be able to stop.” 

Unable to hold back from the temptation any longer, Stefan grabs you, gentler than you thought possible with how starved he was, and brings your open wound to his lips. He hovers there for a second and locks eyes with you before finally biting into your torn flesh. You both groan quietly as the first drops of your blood fall onto his tongue. It doesn’t take long for the blood flow to increase and you moan softly as Stefan begins to drink feely from you. Heat pools in your belly and time slows to a crawl as your best friend's strong arms pull you, soft and pliant, into his lap. 

The room is filled with the soft sound of the crackling fire and the low, needy sounds coming from both of you. You melt into each other and it doesn’t bother you that you’re closer to Stefan than you’ve ever been before. It doesn’t bother you to have his hands rubbing along your arms, waist, neck, and collarbones. The feel of his touch is divine on your skin, setting your body ablaze. The smell of Stefan’s spicy cologne, aged bourbon, burning pine, and your blood mix until you feel dizzy and intoxicated. You want more. 

Eyes heavy, your free hand moves up to touch and explore Stefan’s body as he feeds from you. More heat pools low in your belly and suddenly you desperately want to be on the receiving end of this exchange. Blood may be blood but each person smells and tastes slightly different and dark, needy desire has you thinking dirty thoughts about your best friend. Adjusting on Stefan’s lap, you press your center into his growing erection. The movement is equivalent to dumping ice water on him as he is catapulted back to reality. 

He pulls your wrist from his bloody lips and looks at you with wide, shocked eyes. Speechless, you both stare at each other for a long moment. The air is thick with tension and your body still sings with curiosity and lust but you smile softly up at Stefan. He looks so much better, his color is slowly returning to normal and the bruises under his eyes are much less prominent than they were a few minutes ago. Reaching up, you touch his cheek gently as the wound on your wrist heals itself and closes.

In a breathy, slightly shaky voice you say, “Better, much better.”

Stefan stares down at you cradled in his lap, his now steely erection still pressed to your core. With eyes full of emotion, and a voice full of gravel, he states, “I’ve dreamed of you in my arms like this for so long..Are we complicated now?”

Smiling brightly, you bite your bottom lip gently and move your hips to create more friction against Stefan’s lap. He sucks in a sharp breath and you reply, “No, never.. but I hope you take me upstairs to bed an–” 

With inhuman speed and strength, you’re picked up, carried, and tossed into Stefan’s silken bedsheets faster than you could finish what you were about to say. 

#stefan salvatore #stefan salvatore x reader #stefan salvatore smut #the vampire diaries #tvd fanfiction

[turtletaubwrites]

Gone Too Far ~ Part 20

Pairings: Zoro x Fem!Reader, Sanji x Fem!Reader, Robin x Fem!Reader, Sanji X Robin

This is part 20 of the Series 'We've All Got Needs,' linked below:

Word Count: 4411

We've All Got Needs Masterlist

Ao3 Link (Ch. 10 of We've All Got Needs cont.)

Summary: The crew splits up to enjoy time on Water 7. Then everything goes wrong. Can your crew hold together when it's being torn apart?

Rating/Warnings: AFAB!Reader, She/Her Pronouns for Reader, 18+ Only, MDNI, Reader-Insert, Swearing, ANGST, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Polyamory, Pet Names,

A/N: !!SPOILER WARNING!! Spoilers for the anime for the Water 7 arc. I'm sorry y'all, I had to write it, so please have my tears. This part is rough, but I swear there will be breaks ahead. Plus, I hope you enjoy the extra smut scenes from the missing month, an extra sweet and smutty one will be posted tomorrow! 💜

You grumbled as you got ready for the day, wanting to stay in bed with Robin for the next week.

“Come, botanist. Let’s explore together.”

That stopped your grumbling, and you followed her out on deck. 

Usopp was hugging the mast, and you left Robin’s side for the first time to go pat him on the shoulder.

“You took great care of her, Usopp.”

“Thanks, Y/N. I know all the tinplate patches don’t look like much, but they bring back a lot of fond memories.”

“Why don’t you keep some of them? You can make something cool out of them, like a decoration for the Merry.”

Usopp broke out into a grin.

“That’s a great idea! But don’t tell Luffy, he still wants me to make him a statue.”

“Ha, you have my word.”

“Hey, Needy.”

You had started walking back to Robin, but Zoro’s voice carried over from the bow of the ship. Your body already itched to be close to her again, but you walked toward your swordsman as he leaned over the railing. 

“Hey, babe.”

Zoro stared down at you for a moment, before reaching an arm toward you. Stepping toward his warmth, you let him pull you into a hug.

Outside of sparring, you hadn’t had much time with Zoro since you’d been so focused on Robin getting better. A twist of guilt hit your stomach, but you breathed through it. 

It’s only been a few days, and she almost died. 

Still, part of you had started to worry that he was upset. It’s been a couple months now since you first started seeing each other. Zoro hadn’t had any more blowups recently, and it seemed like things were going well. 

The calm didn’t feel safe though. You wanted to believe that if he was harboring any resentments or pain that he’d come to you, talk to you about it. But he hadn’t brought anything up. It made you uneasy sometimes. 

Knowing that a lot of that fear was your own trauma from past relationships, you fought not to project it onto Zoro. 

I just wish he’d talk to me about his feelings. 

You pulled him tight against you at that thought. At the three little words that you were too much of a coward to say out loud, even after all this time. 

Afraid that you’d scare him away. Afraid that he didn’t feel it too. Afraid that he’d never examine his own feelings enough to know if he could feel it or not. 

Those thoughts made you feel sick, and you knew most of it was your own shit. You didn’t want to think about him that way. 

But no matter how clear you got your mind on those thoughts, you still felt too afraid to tell him. 

“I’m glad she’s okay,” he whispered against your temple.

“Me too.”

You took a deep breath in, still trying to convince your body that it was true. That she was okay. 

“Are you gonna… spend the night with her again?”

You pulled back, searching his eyes.

“Why?”

“I, uh…”

He frowned at you, and you tried not to roll your eyes. 

He’s trying to tell me what he needs. He just doesn't have enough practice yet. 

“Would you like some time with me tonight?”

Zoro looked away from you, but nodded.

“Yeah, I’d like that.”

“Now look who’s needy,” you teased, winning you a playful grin from him as he picked you up. Then he stopped, setting you back down as he looked out across the bow. 

“Hey, I think we’re there.”

Most of the crew ran up, shouting as you all squinted to see the island. 

“He’s right, I can see Water 7!”

Luffy’s excited words had you covering your eyes from the sun, until you could see the island coming into view. It was massive, built of gray stone, huge numbered gates surrounding all sides. Everyone was speechless for a moment as a giant fountain came into view, spiraling water into the air, towering in the center of the island. Canals flowed down, spilling back down into the ocean. 

You squeezed Zoro’s arm before making your way to Robin, loving the way her face lit up at the sight. 

Holding her hand, you laughed as you sailed through the town. Everything was floating. Instead of streets, people took small boats led by strange fish creatures across the water. 

The crew found a place outside the city to dock, and you watched your swordsman furl the sails. His strong arms were mesmerizing as he pulled the rope, but your breath caught in your throat as the mast started to crack. 

“Are you trying to break the ship,” Usopp yelled, as everyone panicked.

“No! All I did was pull the ropes like I always do. Holy shit, if the Merry’s falling apart this easy, we’re lucky we made it here at all.”

Ice sank into your stomach at Zoro’s words. You knew it was bad, but the mast seemed like it was barely holding on to the ship now, swaying dangerously overhead. 

Nami took charge, declaring that Luffy and Usopp accompany her to turn in the reference letter to have the ship looked at, and to trade in the gold from their last big score. 

“I guess I missed my chance to go with them,” Chopper pouted as he watched the group head toward the city. 

“You can come with us later if you like.”

Hearing Robin’s voice still gave you shivers. 

“Really? Can we go to a bookstore?”

“Yes, of course.”

“That sounds great,” you agreed, reaching for her hand again. “I wonder if they have a nursery here, I'd love to see what plants they have available in a floating city.”

You rushed to give Zoro a kiss, then ran after Robin and Chopper as they left the ship. 

A small part of you felt bad for not searching the ship to kiss Sanji goodbye, but it was quickly drowned out by Robin’s laughter, and the feel of her arm around your waist while you followed Chopper. 

~

The city was bustling, street vendors hawking wares, while citizens laughed and bartered. The people were almost strangely friendly here, even to pirates. 

Sometimes a little too friendly.

That thought got stronger the more you and Robin were showered with compliments as you walked past. 

“This town is full of Sanji’s,” Chopper noted, and it left you and Robin in a fit of laughter at the thought of your amorous lover. 

A lot of the townsfolk were wearing painted wooden masks, and you stopped by a vendor to take a look as Robin reassured Chopper that they were just masks, not monsters. 

“It seems the people here take the sea train to San Baldo Island where they hold a costume carnival every day.”

You tilted your head at Robin, while Chopper asked how she could know that. 

“The people walking by are talking about it.”

“And you hear everything they say?”

You tried not to tense your hand in Robin’s, hoping she would answer his question. 

“I can’t help it. Ever since I was young, I’ve made it a habit to keep a critical eye and ear on my environment.”

Her tone toward Chopper was sweet and light, but you felt yourself going still. 

What has she been running from? Why is she so scared?

“Look at that, I think we found your bookstore,” Robin observed.

Chopper ran forward, talking excitedly. You knew public spaces were difficult for him alone, so you found yourself reaching out for him. He shifted into his massive human form, and you raced forward to join him, dropping your hand from Robin’s for a moment. 

“Hold on, Chopper, we’re coming.”

You followed him through the doorway, seeing that he was already perusing the shelves, and that no one seemed to be bothering him. 

I’m glad everyone here is so friendly.

Robin hadn’t joined you yet, so you stepped back outside.

The street looked the same. Vendors, customers, people in masks. 

Ice cold fear shot through you. 

Where’s Robin?

“Chopper! We have to go.”

“But, Y/N,” he said, a pile of books in his large arms. 

“Robin’s missing!”

Panic raced through you, and you saw Chopper’s eyes fill with concern as he left the books on the counter. 

Chopper shifted into his reindeer form, and you yelled her name as he followed her scent.

She’s okay, she probably just got distracted.

What if Aokiji came back? What if he took her?

What if she’s hurt?

Robin didn’t answer your calls, but you kept trying until your voice got hoarse. 

~

“I’m sorry, Y/N, it’s like her scent just vanished.”

“What do you mean vanished?”

“I don’t know, it just stopped,” the note of panic in Chopper’s voice as he explained wasn’t helping your speeding pulse. 

“Hold on…” 

Chopper lifted his nose to the air, and hope gripped your chest.

“There’s something else over here. I know that smell.”

Racing to look around the corner, your hope dropped when she wasn’t there. Instead, you found Sanji.

He was sitting on the edge, looking out to sea with a pile of groceries beside him. 

“Sanji! Have you seen Robin?”

Chopper's hooves clattered on the stone as he caught up to your frantic steps. Sanji frowned at him.

“I just saw her. It seemed like she ignored me, and she was walking with a large person in a masked outfit. I thought that was you in your human form, Chopper.”

“It wasn’t m-”

“She’s missing, Sanji!”

You gripped his arm, watching him take in your features, your panicked eyes. He gestured behind him, looking around the area.

“I followed her over here, and it seemed like she just disappeared.”

“So did her scent.”

Your ears were starting to ring as they spoke, and you pulled away, shouting her name. 

“Angel, hold on!”

He clambered after you, grabbing the groceries as he and Chopper followed. 

Your voice was cracking, and your breaths were ragged. 

Sanji dropped the bags again, wrapping his arms around you. 

“We’ll get her back, Y/N. We’ll always get her back.”

They convinced you to hop into a boat while you continued to call for her around the area, before heading back to meet with the rest of the crew. 

You noticed Sanji and Chopper had started speaking in hushed tones, and you were able to pull yourself together enough to start listening. 

“I hope she’s alright. I feel uneasy.”

“Do you need an examination?”

“No, Chopper, it’s not like that. It’s what the admiral said, all that terrible stuff he said about Robin’s past…”

Your voice was raspy and empty as you interrupted.

“Protecting this troublesome woman leads to nothing but regret.”

They turned to you, brows tensed in concern. You kept going. 

“He said that every group she’s ever been a part of has been destroyed, everyone except for her.”

You glared defiantly at them, anger bubbling in you. 

“But I don’t care about her past. I don’t care what he said.”

Sanji gripped your knee while Chopper nodded.

“None of us care, sweetheart. We’re going to get her back.”

~

“The Merry can’t sail again.”

You couldn’t understand Zoro’s words as Chopper and Sanji started to argue. Your fists clenched hard, nails digging into your skin as you tried to make sense of everything.

“It just seems so extreme, it's our same old Merry, we’ve traveled with her so long.” 

Sanji’s emotional words brought you into the moment, only for Zoro’s calm, unaffected voice to make your mind go sickly still. 

“You just answered your own question. Human beings get stronger after hardship, but ship’s wounds just pile up. The shipwright said her keel is broken, she won’t even make it to the next island.”

Chopper started to cry, and you almost sobbed as you watched Sanji touch the top of his hat to comfort him. 

“We need to find Ro-”

“Hey, everyone!”

Nami’s frantic voice interrupted your plea, and you watched her climb onto the deck. She was carrying a large briefcase, and was dripping with sweat and tears. You ran to her, fresh panic flooding your veins.

“Are you o-”

“Usopp’s hurt! Some assholes called the Franky Family stole most of our money for the Merry, and they- they…”

Everyone surrounded her, all speaking at once while you moved her hair out of her face, taking the briefcase from her trembling arms.

“Where’s Usopp?”

Chopper’s serious voice broke through Nami’s staggered breaths. You felt like your world was spinning as the boys set out to find him, and to go after the pieces of shit that hurt your friend. 

Zoro’s face was inches from yours, his hands gripping your arms. 

“Stay here with Nami. Protect the Merry. Okay, Needy? You need to stay here. Protect that money so we can get a new ship.”

Nami gripped your hand while Sanji kissed your temple. 

Zoro’s eyes burned into yours. 

“Promise me, Needy.”

“I promise,” you managed to whisper, voice still shot from yelling Robin’s name. 

Nami’s palm was clammy in yours as you watched your crewmates head back into danger. 

Why is this happening?

~

It felt like years had passed when you finally saw the five Straw Hat boys walking home, Luffy back with his crew, and Chopper’s human form carrying Usopp’s bloody, limp body.

You sat on deck against the unstable mast, and tried not to scream at everyone.

We need to find Robin. 

“Angel, are you okay?”

Sanji was crouching in front of you, soft eyes searching yours.

“No.”

His lips pursed as he nodded, and he looked like he was about to speak when Chopper yelled.

“He’s awake!”

Relief moved through you for your friend as you followed the crew inside. But you caught Sanji’s eyes, and knew that he was still thinking about your missing archaeologist too. Reaching for his hand as you went through the door, you caught the sound of Usopp crying out. 

“This wouldn’t have happened if I was strong like you guys. It’s all my fault, I’m so ashamed of myself!”

Even covered in bruises and bandages, Usopp lurched forward, catching Zoro off guard as he wrapped his arms around one of his thighs. Zoro seemed to panic, flailing a bit, unsure of what to do as Usopp wept against him. 

Tears streamed down your face. You knew all too well the fears of failing the crew because you weren’t strong enough. 

“It’s not that big a deal, alright. Calm down.”

Zoro squirmed as Usopp still clung to him, and you rushed forward, rubbing Usopp on the shoulder until he let Zoro go. He clung to you now, and you didn’t know what to say. You just held your friend, letting your own tears fall quietly as he kept sobbing in your arms.

“I lost the money, what are we gonna do about the Merry?”

“You need to rest, Usopp, or you won’t get better,” Chopper pleaded, the threat of tears in his voice. 

Luffy was finally able to calm Usopp a bit, declaring that they would find that asshole, Franky. 

“Besides, even if we can’t get our money back, we still have a hundred million berry, so don’t worry about it!”

You thought the vein in Nami’s forehead would pop when she scolded him. The crew had lost two hundred million berry on Usopp’s watch.

Poor Usopp. This is awful.

The thought of what a shitty day it was brought you back to Robin, and you almost screamed to get everyone to focus on her. But Usopp’s hopeful voice made your stomach twist in knots. 

“Is Merry gonna be okay? Can we get her fixed with the money we’ve got? There’s all these awesome shipwrights, you talked to them about it, right?”

Luffy glossed over the pain, smiling as he broke the news. 

“Uh, yeah, we did. But we decided to get a new ship instead. The Going Merry has taken good care of us, but it looks like our journey has to end here. But look, there’s a bunch of great ships we can still afford,” Luffy said lightly as he showed Usopp a catalog from the shipyard.

Feeling the pain from the silent crew with the captain’s choice, the look in Usopp’s eyes made your heart break. 

You watched him build himself up again, trying to convince himself that it was a joke. 

Until he looked at all of your faces, the truth evident. 

“Does it mean we don’t have enough for the repairs? Is it because I lost the money?”

“Usopp-”

You tried to move back to him, wanting to reassure him, but Zoro’s firm hand on your shoulder stopped you. 

Usopp was yelling at Luffy now, demanding the truth, and you’d never seen Luffy’s face like this. Not when looking at a friend. 

His teeth were clenched as he held his words in, sweat beading on his brow. Until he started yelling back. 

Zoro moved past you then, stepping in to stop the fight. You caught eyes with Nami, your pain echoed in hers.

“I don’t see what I’m doing wrong, he’s the one saying all this dumb shit.”

Nami broke in to stop Usopp, begging him to calm down and rest. 

“Who cares about me? How can you all just sit here when he's making jokes about getting a new ship?”

Luffy was shaking now as he started to yell back.

“I’m not joking about anything, this was a hard decision for me too!”

“Oh yeah, I feel really sorry for you,” Usopp growled, before grabbing the ship catalog out of his hand. “Already window shopping for a new toy!”

You gasped as Usopp slammed the pages to the ground, wishing this nightmare would fucking end so your crew would be safe and happy again. 

“Are you trying to pick a fight with me, Usopp?”

He kept yelling at your captain, demanding to know that it was his fault for losing the money, his fault for failing the Merry. 

Luffy finally said the words, the painful words that none of you wanted to hear. But you hoped it would stop the fight. 

“The Merry can’t be fixed.”

But that awful truth didn’t stop the fight. Usopp denied, and accused, and bartered. Then he demanded.

“Don’t give up on the Merry!”

Hot tears stung your cheeks as you stood frozen. 

More yells and accusations toward Luffy felt like whips snapping in your face, almost making you flinch with each swing. 

Sweet Chopper moved toward Usopp, hoofs quivering as he reached out. 

“I know you’re upset, but you need to calm down.”

“Not until we settle this, I won’t let you take the Merry away from me! You’re ignoring your crew, ignoring your friends. I can’t believe that’s the kinda captain you turned out to be.”

Usopp had stood and grabbed Luffy by the front of his shirt. He wasn’t listening to any of your voices as the crew pleaded with him to stop. 

“I thought you were better than this!”

“You’re not being fair, Usopp-,” Nami tried again, before Luffy flung out his arm for her to stop.

“You stay out of this. It was my call. We’re getting a new ship whether you like it or not.”

Usopp was sweating through his bandages now, dark spots of blood showing through some of them. You didn’t know your friend could make a face like the one he had right now. You felt like you were going to throw up. 

They kept screaming, and you couldn’t follow the words anymore as you watched in horror. Sanji tried to step between them, but Luffy pushed Usopp to the ground, yelling in his face. Nami cried out, and you tried to run forward, but Zoro stopped you again. You almost screamed at him. 

Luffy’s next yell pierced through it all.

“Fine, if you don’t like the way your captain does things then why don’t you get-”

Sanji’s leg was so fast as it spun, launching Luffy straight through the kitchen table, shards of wood and dust flying. You gaped at your cook, rage and sweat dripping from him. 

“This is going way too far. What the hell is wrong with you? If you don’t watch it you’re going to say something you can’t take back, so calm down.”

Sanji was shaking now, breath ragged, and you felt your lips quiver at the anger in his eyes. 

Luffy crawled from the broken pieces of the table, and apologized. You felt a breath of relief, before Usopp tore it away. 

“If you’re gonna throw away the Merry, might as well throw me away too.”

Sanji tried to step in again, but then Usopp laid out his own fears before the crew. You felt raw, aching. You wanted to reassure your friend, but how could you, when you felt the same way he did about being weak?

“It’s not like it was before. You’re all too strong for me now. You can’t even trust me to guard our money. You don’t want weak people on your crew do you?”

Nausea flooded you, your own guilt and shame at your weakness making you hate yourself in this moment. 

“I’m leaving the crew. This is goodbye.”

It’s only a matter of time before something like this happens to me. Maybe I should follow Usopp. Maybe he's right. 

Most of the crew lurched forward, calling for him until he shut the door. Part of you was screaming to join him, to leave the crew before you could fail them, before you could hate yourself for failing them. 

“Luffy, what are you doing, go after him!”

Nami’s frantic voice kept pleading with him, but he stayed down, eyes dark. 

“Fine, have it your way then.”

Nami ran out the door, Sanji and Chopper following. You heard the three of them calling his name, but you couldn’t get your feet to move. Luffy and Zoro stayed, their silence heavy. Finally, Luffy stood, moving outside. You ached for him, finally free to follow.

Usopp’s voice carried over from the shore, and you grabbed Nami’s hand. 

Please, Usopp, please come back.

“I challenge you to a duel, Monkey D. Luffy! At ten tonight. If I win I'm taking the Merry, and I’m leaving.”

The silence on deck was deafening as you watched Usopp’s limping form move toward the city.

Robin’s still missing. 

You hated yourself for it, but thinking about Robin was the only thing keeping you from falling into self pity. The only thing keeping you from leaving the ship in shame along with Usopp. 

So you dug through her quarters. She was so private, and you felt sick as you searched for any kind of clue for where she might have gone. 

You could hear Nami pleading with Luffy through the thin walls to apologize, and talk things through. 

“It’s gone too far already.”

You shivered at Luffy’s tone, and kept on your hunt. 

It wasn't long before you heard your boys screaming at each other, and you sank to the floor, too spent to try to stop them. 

I’m worthless. I can’t protect anyone. I can’t do anything. 

Nami tapped lightly on the door, calling your name softly. 

“Y/N, it’s ten.”

Swallowing your self pity, you followed your friend to the deck again, watching Usopp’s silhouette against the city lights as he moved closer. 

“Listen up, I don’t want any of you leaving the ship,” Luffy called over his shoulder.

You grabbed onto Chopper’s small arm as he started screaming, crying for them not to fight. 

But nothing would stop them now. 

Usopp started pelting Luffy with all different types of ammo, and you couldn’t hear what they were saying over the waves, and Chopper’s cries. 

You thought Luffy was going easy on him at first, letting Usopp hit him, but soon you saw your captain jumping off the ground in pain shaking off what looked like caltrops. 

Then the air around Luffy was filled with flames. Luffy made it through the smoke, and you almost screamed as you saw him pull his fists back. But before he could make contact, Usopp kept shooting star after star, and you watched your friend, the sniper, hold his own against your captain.

For a while, at least.

Luffy was looking wrecked, and you felt a twinge of disgust in yourself that you felt proud of Usopp for hurting him so badly.

This is horrible. 

Then Luffy pulled back again, and this time, his fist hit. You sobbed as you clasped your hand over your mouth. Usopp swayed for a moment, and you could see more blood draining from him even from a distance. 

You fell against the railing, barely holding yourself up as Usopp collapsed. 

“At least it’s over now.”

Zoro’s steady voice made your head whip around, finding him looking as he usually does. Stoic, seemingly unmoved. Your mind was too filled with pain to think clearly, and then Sanji’s voice broke through. 

Chopper was crying, trying to jump off the ship to help Usopp. Sanji was holding him trying to stop him and you wanted to scream. 

“I’m a doctor-”

“He’s not a part of our crew anymore.”

Chopper shifted into his human form, but Sanji tackled him. You sank to the ground as you watched everyone fall apart.

“Chopper, it’s bad enough that he lost the fight. If you pity him now, you’ll end up hurting him even more. He knew this is how it might end when he challenged Luffy. We need to give him dignity in defeat.”

“That’s such bullshit,” you growled, voice cracking. You might have yelled if your voice wasn’t shot.

Sanji glanced back at you with pained eyes. Chopper used that moment to break away, running off the ship toward Usopp’s crumpled body. 

Pulling yourself to your feet, you went to Nami, clasping your cold hands together.

Luffy made his way back, his head lowered under his hat, and you let out a sob at the pain in his cracking voice.

“It’s too much.”

Zoro didn’t even turn to face him as he took a breath.

“This is what it means to be captain. You can’t doubt yourself. If you lose your confidence, then who can we have faith in?”

Emptiness filled you as everyone stood silent. Then Zoro had to say the last words, the truth that twisted like a knife. 

“Usopp can never return to the crew.”

Thank You for Reading! 💜

TurtleTaub Fanfic Masterlist

We've All Got Needs Masterlist

Part 21

Tag List: @astheni-a | @ferns-fics | @heilee | @iamn1ya | @ghostfacefricker6969 | @onlybassoon01 | @apothicgloom | @slyhersophia | @cyberaestheticals

A/N: I'm sorry 😭😭😭 We won't be sad forever! I hope you enjoy the sweet and smutty extra scene with Sanji tomorrow, I'll make sure we have a good mix to get us through all this angst 💜

Buy me a coffee ☕🙏🏼

#sanji x reader #nico robin x reader #zoro x reader #one piece fanfic #mine #Fem!Reader #Reader Insert #poly fanfic #nico robin x fem!reader #one piece x reader #nico robin fanfic #sanji fanfic #zoro fanfic #x reader #turtletaub fics

[littlenahsstuff]

Liar

Amanda Young x Reader

Warnings: blood, gore, angst, betrayal, choking, sad with a happy ending, slow, mentions of character death, self harm, blades, anxiety, longer fic, pov shifts kinda, also it’s mainly Amanda’s pov just cuz

Summary: you find out Amanda is a serial killer the hard way, by falling into a trap she made. You survive but does your relationship?

A/n: suggestions are welcome as long as they’re nice, also not proofread

Amanda missed another one of your dates because of her job, which, you don’t know anything about. You were hoping she was just some high level agent if you were being honest. It would explain the natural muscles and bad-assery that was your girlfriend. That’s also why she keeps getting cuts and bruises you tell yourself.

You at least knew that they weren’t from self harm, they were too scattered to be from that and you can somehow tell when Amanda hides self harm scars. It’s like a sixth sense, telling when she’s in danger.

You got the feeling more than you’d like too, but it was a little different when it was caused by Amanda herself. She seems more satisfied with herself sadly.

You just want your precious girl to be happy and safe, even if it’s only been a couple of months she’s your entire world. It just kinda happened but at this point in your life Amanda was the only person you talked to other than the occasional phone call from an old friend once a year. You were just floating right now with Amanda being your rock to tie you down and you, hers.

You convinced her to go on anxiety medication. Well, she refused to get a prescription (she can’t go to the doctors after Dr. Gordon) so she kinda shares your prescription both well aware that’s not a good idea but it does seem to help her and you would do anything for her.

The downside is you aren’t taking your prescribed amount and your next appointment to try and up the dosage, so one pill does the trick for both of you when you split it in half, is months away. You yourself are falling, you can feel it. You keep telling yourself that you gotta just wait it out and take it one day at a time for Amanda.

Right now you’re driving home from work in the rainy city. Your apartment is not Amanda’s yet but what little free time she has away from work is spent there so it might as well be.

A particular bolt of lightning hits a little too close for your liking and the booming thunder after it chills you to your bone. You don’t feel so good.

You try to just focus on what’s ahead while steadying your breathing. Traffic is light on the outskirts of the city, the small complex is right on the town line in a small patch of woods next to one of the parks.

You hate outside dark, outside dark is open and anything could surround you on all sides. You run up to your floor and flick on the lights but to no avail the darkness still remains. Your stomach is tight as a knot at this point, really wishing the owner allowed candles or that you had remembered to buy more batteries for the flashlight.

You grumbled to yourself, thinking you should just go to bed early. So feeling your way through the pitch black apartment, you stumbled a total of three times and now have a stubbed toe. It was a great fucking night that’s for sure.

Your bed offered little to no relief on your aching post-work back but the exhaustion was taking over rapidly. You shuffled a little to get comfy but then heard a creak of a floorboard.

“Hello?” You called out. Nobody answers, why would they. “Mands is that you? Come on you know how scared I get babes. Not the time to do this shit,” no response and yet another creak. You were still though, it couldn’t have been the bed which never makes much sound anyways. You sat up now and try to train your eyes to the darkness, no moonlight was there to help.

You frantically open the drawer to your dresser and procure a weapon Mandy gifted you for protection, boy were you great full now. You couldn’t tell where the thing or person was so you waved it about hoping it would get them.

Your eyes started to adjust and you saw a figure in the corner, once it realized you could see it, it lunged forward at you, sticking you with what you assume was an anesthetic by the lightheaded feeling making it hard for you to push them off. Your screams were muffled with a hand, you tried to bite them but it felt like you were swimming in syrup. Eventually everything just stopped as you lulled backwards.

The figure swooped you over their shoulder and took you out of your apartment, stuffing you in the trunk of a car pulled of to the back of the building.

Amanda’s POV:

She really did feel awful that she had to cancel another date, she knew that whenever she did you just stayed at work later in hopes to distract yourself. She knew you understood but if you knew what was really happening she’s not sure the understanding would still apply.

John called her in with a special request, no details were given about this person and she wasn’t even the one to kidnap them. All she had to do was come up with a new trap. She thought it was like a test to see if her engineering skills have gotten better as well as her “moral” compass. John always was better at tinkering than her and John had found out about her previous unwinnable games so this was most likely just a checkin to see if she would deter again from the purpose.

She blames herself, if she didn’t get all trigger happy with the traps she wouldn’t be missing another date night. She triple-checked to make sure this game was beatable but not too easy, John doesn’t like it when they are too hard orrrr to easy. It was a comfortable in between but definitely still very much challenging. Whoever plays it would have to give up a lot of blood to live if they aren’t careful. It was a solo game, that’s all that was required for this one.

She really hoped that this would be done quick. So while the trap might have been beatable, the timer was set to go off probably fifteen minutes before it should. Good luck to whoever plays this, she hopes they’re pretty bad or else the guilt will eat at her for the rest of the month. Sometimes John picked stupid targets that didn’t do anything bad necessarily as much as he believes it with his “solid” ideals. Maybe after John dies she can hand everything over to mark and move far away from this hell city with you. As much as she wants to, she needs to take care of John for the time being. He’s practically her father at this point.

With the trap finally finished she hands it over to Mark who’s been oddly quiet in the corner. He had a smug expression nobody liked, he was up to something.

“Hope you didn’t make this one unbeatable,” he laughs. He never cared if they were or not before so she’s a little put off, assuming he’s just teasing her for her screw up with John.

“Yeah, yeah,” she mutters and turns around to pick up her stuff. She just wants to get home to you so bad.

“Hold up,” Mark stops her, “John wants you to watch live with him. She groans in response.

“Fine let’s get this over with,” and with that they leave.

It was the same old set up, a rusty building. She definitely didn’t like the idea of having to get a tetnus shot. She hates needles, preferring to sedate people using chloroform or with blunt force to the back of the head.

She split ways with mark, her going to the observing room where John was already.

“Hello Amanda,” he croaked smugly.

“What is with you and Mark, you guys act like you just got the president?”

“They certainly are important but no, they are not the president. I can’t wait to see your work on them, I’m sure after our talk this trap will be exemplary?” He tilts his head upwards. She awkwardly laughs, his questioning gaze makes her slightly uncomfortable.

“Should be,” she mutters.

“Well then let’s begin.” She turns on the cameras to see marks back covering the kidnapped. She yawns but when he moves away it cuts off with a choke. She really hopes her eyes are deceiving her, she still can’t see much of the face but everything else looks exactly like what you were wearing this morning. They really need better cameras but money is tight in the Jigsaw business.

“So, I didn’t ask before but what’s the name of this one?” She starts to panic, please don’t say your name, please.

“I thought you’d recognize Y/n?”

Everything shatters, she doesn’t know what you could have possibly done to deserve this so she assumes it’s her fault for going against orders.

“John please, you and I both know she doesn’t deserve this. She isn’t cruel I would know she tells me everything, I put a tracker on her all she does is go to work!” She’s pleading for your life right now.

“I know, this is for you though. Even if she has done nothing she lacks the understanding you and I have of our message. The only way to understand is through this method. If she doesn’t make it out than she’s not worth it anyways, she didn’t fight hard enough for you.” His explanation makes sense but what happens when you don’t. She already knows you’d fight for her as hard as you could, she doesn’t need proof of that. And honestly she was content on hiding this part of her life from you forever.

Oh god, you must have been so scared, your about to be terrified when you wake up. She’s torn, she could get you and risk everything, Mark would kill both of you anyways and John might let it happen too. She has to painfully wait it out.

“I can see your worried, rightfully so, this is good. I promise. We do good for the world, and I’m doing good for you.” She wants to strangle him but she just breaks down sobbing. She sees you moving on the monitor in the corner of her eye and her breath hitches; you’re awake.

Mark had left the room and made no attempt at sticking around. He probably went home like the two of you should have.

She didn’t want to watch but she needed to see how you progressed. There was a collar on you’re neck that squeeze a millimeter tighter every five minutes, which originally would have killed you in an hour but she adjusted it so it gave you forty-five minutes. It’s incredible how cruel life can be. She threatened somebody’s life more just to get to you but now she might not get to you because it’s you who might die.

There was no audio but she could see all of the panic by the way you tensed, she would hate herself forever. You were not completely an idiot, thankfully. You checked all around you immediately and then found an envelope eventually in your pocket. The next thing you found was the tape recorder taped on the underside of an old table.

She had no idea what it said or how helpful the hints would be. She always debriefed John on how to disable the traps because his favorite thing was to record those tapes, so she let him. Her stomach jolted when she remembered your device cut into your neck as well. It wouldn’t draw blood until the thirty minute mark but blood loss was an added motivator to get the player to hurry up. She could tell you wanted to throw up when you heard something specific on the tape. Most likely that you would need to mutilate yourself more to find the key hidden inside your body. She had no idea where mark put it but she did know that your entire body had to be cut so you wouldn’t be able to tell exactly where it was put in your body just by looking.

You were then most likely searching for something sharp to preform the painful process of self-mutilation. She knew that the key would be put somewhere easily accessible at least given the time limit. You found a knife behind a pipe and you stared at it.

You hesitated, now what not the time for contemplation, Y/n.

She saw you sit on the ground and feel around for any foreign objects under your skin, when you paused and then continued to feel a specific spot right over your heart she went whiter than she had been.

“I didn’t tell him to put it there,” John muttered. He wasn’t worried for you but maybe a little for Amanda’s sanity. He thought she would be handling this better, he had to remind himself that this was in her best interests. He needed to make sure you were perfect for his little girl.

She just stared blankly at the screen. It had been 25 minutes already, you had just enough time to gauge the key out but you were looking worse for wear and had to be very careful with the cutting. You now had your shirt off and we’re biting down on it as the blade sliced your skin where the cut already was. You were shaking, barely managing to get the key.

By the time you got it out it was only 2 minutes left which you used to unlock the death collar. You threw it with whatever might you had left to the other side of the room.

When the timer was finally up the collar snapped tightly together. You where bleeding everywhere, but still stood back up to greet Billy the Puppet as he wheeled in to the now open door. Again she had no idea what he was saying to you but you looked right at the camera and ran out the door. She could hear your footsteps come closer to her room.

You burst in with a newfound strength and yelled as well as you could with a sliced neck,

“Amanda are you okay, oh my god I was- are you hurt? Oh-“ you stopped and looked around her, John was still there but what really confused you was that she looked not only completely fine, but that there were monitors with the room you were just in on them.

“Before you go allow me to explain,” John spoke up, “you my dear have been chosen to help revive humanity. What that was, was a test. You passed and now appreciate life. Amanda here did not know about you, however, she did make the trap. If you join us then, you too, can spread an appreciation for life.” Your eye twitched and you looked back and forth and back and forth and then collapsed.

Amanda ran to catch you, this was from blood loss and probably you finding out she was a serial killer as well as working with the man who now not only gave her trauma but you too.

You knew how fucked up that ordeal made her, you know how badly her nightmares still are. What you didn’t know was that even though she’s mentioned feeling more alive and slightly grateful that she herself would become the thing that she feared.

“She passed. I’m gonna patch her up, she just needs time,” Amanda sniffled, tears finally poured down her face. You were still here, she would never let you go again. She dragged you out of there and back to her room where all her medical supplies were, and she started to patch you up, kissing each stitch despite it getting her bloody too.

When she was done she laid you to rest and started to come up with things to say to beg you to stay when you inevitably break up with her. She doesn’t know if she can let you go but she realizes it’s ultimately your decision. She’s already hurt you so much.

Twenty minutes go by when you awake to Amanda holding your hand. Your eyes aren’t open but you desperately wish that none of that was real. The aching and stinging pain coursing through you was a dead giveaway that this was real. You peeled your eyes open to a greatfully dim room, Amanda’s room.

“Your awake,” she states.

“Were you gonna tell me if the Jigsaw killer didn’t put me in that situation?” You asked. She didn’t want to lie anymore

“No… but I wanted to forget about it myself. I just wanted to spread the message until John- the Jigsaw Killer died. I was gonna runaway with you so we could live happily. I would never miss a date night again and yeah, you wouldn’t have known about that but I couldn’t lose you. I never wanted this at all, I just didn’t want you to leave me. I will never ever hurt you again. I technically owe John my life and in the process of repaying him he treated me like a daughter more than anyone before. I know you know I’m sick but it’s so much worse than that, I care about you both so much. I would have gotten you out of there but the man who put you in there, Mark, would have killed you anyways. I know I am a sick person, I will never pay enough for this but please don’t leave me, please! You are the only thing that makes me feel normal and sane. You can leave when your better if you must. But if you are willing, we can work together, the idea is insane but you and I are proof that it works. I want to live life again and live it with you please.”

You look at her and your eyes gloss over, you have no idea what the hell to do but as much as you hate it she’s all you’ve got too. Everything is screaming at you to just run away to the hospital and get their asses arrested. Everything.

Except your heart.

You fought to live for her, you could have waited for death rather than living through this trauma but you fought to see her again and when that puppet told you she was here you had the exact same look of horror still plastered on Amanda’s face. He’s right and you know it, you want to live more. Maybe you’re more fucked up than originally thought.

“Okay” you say

She tilts her head afraid to ask you to continue so you do for her.

“I can’t leave you, but I don’t want to be a part of this idea for awhile,” you wince, “I need time to think that over but I know that after everything I still just wanna be held by you. I’ll stay…” you pause, “I don’t forgive you right now but if you ever lie to me again I will leave faster than that stupid puppet can wheel into a room. I know you wouldn’t hurt me on purpose, but it’s going to take a bit till I can trust you again.”

She finally lets go of a breath she’s been holding in since she met you. You’re gonna stay with her even though you know everything and went through it.

You’re staying.

“Yes, now come on into the bed I’ve had an insanely long day.”

“Anything for you”, she replies, kissing you softer than ever before.

#amanda young x reader #the pig x reader #amanda young #saw #saw franchise

[doki-doki-imagines]

Bunny boy

Michael Kaiser is the winner of this event! Go under the Read More to see the meaning of some phrase/words

If the post won't show up this time too I promise I won't care. Maybe

TW: Probable OCD for Michael, panic attack, angst with happy ending, happy for real don't worry

“Please don’t go” Michael almost whines, something you never dream to hear from a football superstar of his caliber.

Thankfully you do, it’s not like you had to do anything better at home, and seeing a football superstar beg you wonderfully strokes your ego.

This decision reveals to be crucial for Michael’s health. It takes you a look at his pupils, his ragged breath, and his latex-covered hand clenching almost desperately your arm, to understand that the situation was going downhill really fast.

Meanwhile, Michael’s brain couldn’t work anymore, the breath of the people at the local giving him goosebumps, some people sneezing, others coughing, he can literally see the particles flying in the air. The shirt he wetted before, now clutching on his body feels like a strait-jacket; who knows how many people drank from that bawl that he spilled on himself earlier.

Intrusive thoughts invade his brain, he can’t think of anything other than all the illnesses these commoners are going to give him; how could he act so carelessly?

Michael let go of your arms, he pulls away like someone that just touched fire, he looks around searching for the nearest bathroom, but his eyes are already full of tears, as much as he looks left and right he can’t see anything other than one room full of ‘walking bacteria’ and he just needs to escape.

He tries, but he falls on his right knee, legs giving out, Michael’s mind so dizzy that he doesn’t even notice how hard he hits the ground.

And nobody cares. Not a single soul called for help. Or cared enough to ask him if everything is okay.

You never thought such a small local could contain so much shit.

“Michael, can you hear my voice?”

You crouch down next to him, but at a safe distance, in case you need to avoid being hit. Michael replies with a hum, it is enough for you to go on.

“Michael I think you are having a panic attack, am I right?”

A nod between shivers.

“Please Michael don’t curl into a ball and look at me.”

Thankfully he listens to you and stares straight into your eyes (or you think so, his mind must be so fogged right now to see clearly)

“Now I want you to breathe in through your nose and breath out from your mouth, can you feel the air going in? How it goes from cold to hot? Can you?”

He follows you, his breathing still going a little too fast to be normal, but at least he looks calmer than before.

“Now close your eyes and concentrate on the flow of the air, use your diaphragm to breathe, can you feel it going down your torso?” and he nods “Okay keep this going, just listen to my voice and concentrate on your breath, everything else doesn’t exist, just you and me”

It takes a dozen minutes for Michael to be finally able to breathe normally, to look fine, then he slowly opens his eyes, your face the first thing he sees in his field of vision; to say the truth you are the only one he wants to look at this moment.

“Want to hold my hands? Look I just cleaned them, still smell like soap if you don’t believe me” You say, voice barely a whisper, warm and soothing

Michael accepts, not without giving a sniff first (like you didn’t notice it, he is a terrible actor)

“Can I get a hug too?” he says with a bold smirk, but his tired eyes told you the truth and with fake annoyance you accept.

“You should also pet my head, and try not to touch the ears, they are made of latex, you know? Really delicate” Michael dares to ask, maybe it is easier to do when his face is hidden behind your shoulders.

“Do you also want a butt slice? Aren’t you asking a bit too much!?” You reply back so fast that Michael got taken aback.

He pulls up to look straight into your eyes, hands now gripping your shoulder, the tremblings from before completely vanished, and then Michael bursts laughing, one of those ugly, loud, but sincere ones. You can’t help but laugh along with the guy in your arms, noticing how different his eyes look right now, a wonderful shade of sky blue, smile shining so bright even in this dark room (and are those dimples? You are a lucky bastard Michael), his chest still wet from the beverage he spilled on himself earlier making his chest shine so bright and your eyes just wander ‘till they stop to look at his erect and perfectly shaped nipp-

What the hell are you doing? Don’t make the arrogant bastard you just helped in a bad moment notice how attracted you are to him.

Too bad. It is too late.

“Schatz, I know I’m hot, but if you keep staring I may think you want to eat me up”

You fool. Your soft heart and your (newfound) Wendy syndrome just signed your demise.

Because Michael is endlessly handsome, too much for his own good and you noticed him after the first step in the local. Sadly you also noticed how dramatic and eccentric he is and just avoided him, trying to blend with the moldy walls, avoiding his teasing glazes, hoping you won’t be picked; sadly you also noticed the many heated glances he sent your way, making you warm and tingly all over.

“You wish blondie. Did you hit your head earlier? Something is wrong for sure with your sight”

Michael laughs, but this time is sneering and you feel like it’s the right time to dig your own grave.

“Maybe I did, you look beautiful right now”

Internal screaming. Panic. It feels like someone stabbed you, but the person stabbed you with some dumb shit like a cupid arrow that makes you all warm and the person is a beautiful blonde German dressed like a bunny that is now in your arms, looking like he wants to devour you.

You squeak and push him away, finally standing up and putting as much distance as possible.

Michael is still on his knees, looking at you with predatory eyes, looking for a weak point to target and attack, licking his chapped lips like a tiger ready to feast upon his prey; you are the bunny, all trembling and with a speedup heartbeat.

Thank God he doesn’t say anything about your poor state, he dusts his leather pants and stands up too, just now you notice how big he is in comparison to you, a fact you notice even more when he stands a breath away from you.

“Anyway I need to repay you, come to my hotel room”

“What?”

“Yes, I can offer you something to drink, why that sour expression? Don’t tell me you hoped for something more Häschen ”

“Shut up! I’ll go home-“ why is he looking at you with that knowing smile, just stop “ -alone! You are not welcome!”

“If you don’t want to come with me, at least give me your number” What an impudent guy! But… was it really worth acting high and mighty when deep down you also know you are interested?

“At maximum my Insta” You tell him, but the smirk on his face upon looking at your profile made you question all of the life choices that took you to this moment.

“Deal accepted Häschen. Can’t wait to take you out, maybe next time dress better than tonight though”

You want to scream at him, throw something, but you are just left there, mouth gasping like a fish, while Michael leaves the local, waving at you with his latex-clad hand, shaking his behind more like a happy dog than a bunny.

Who were you trying to fool? After all, you already missed his presence; ohh you are so intoxicated by Michael. For sure it won’t be easy to hide your crush when you’ll meet again.

“Do you also want a butt slice?” = link ik it's Italian only, but the expression is too good not to be spread around

Schatz = Treasure

(edit)Häschen = "little bunny"

#bllk imagines #bllk x reader #blue lock imagines #blue lock x reader #michael kaiser x reader #Everyone had a theme and Michael was angst

[qpenpals]

First of all, support Shubble and support all victims (which is a statement that while said a lot, seems not be followed as frequently, however i hope those who read this abide by it)

Second, I don’t support wilbur soot/william gold, and I don’t think that anyone should after this.

Third, while this situation is not about me, i have feelings and opinions about it that i would like to share, but even if you don’t read anymore,

Please watch shelby’s vod, and maybe try checking her content out, because while i don’t frequently watch her, i enjoy her streams and maybe you will too! her new hardcore series sounds great :)

This is quite long, but honestly this is kind of just for me to collect my thoughts, however if you read to the end thank you<3 im touched :)

ALSO ABUSE TRIGGER WARNING

Alright, so I have loved wilbur soot’s content for a very long time, 4 years or so. I watched the streams and listened to his music from the start. His content is entwined with many of my fond memories.

Earlier today, I had a breakdown over this whole situation, because, as I’ve been quite busy with school, my job, and other assorted things in my life, I found out about this morning. I had woken from a nightmare about my previous abuser. Who i will be talking about a lot more of as they really impacted my views on this situation.

However this nightmare had left me in a fragile mood, my girlfriend was still sleeping and i didn’t want to wake her, so to comfort myself i went to read one of my bookmarked fanfictions, this fanfiction, while i dont remember the title is one that i’ve found comforting for a very long time, so much so that when im stressed my partner has it saved to send to me so i can calm down.

It was a fanfiction about quackity and tubbo, wilbur soot was mentioned maybe 5 times, and the author had deleted it.

This caused me to try and find out why, so i went to their page and they had posted a temporary fic explaining what had been going on.

My first reaction had been disbelief, I then went to research everything. It was a lot to process.

I watched shelby’s vod. Before this i had mainly been disconnected from what i had seen, taking it it but not with any of my own feelings or thoughts really, just processing.

Shelby’s situation hits really hard for me because a lot of it mirrors my own abusive relationship of a few years ago. The wording Wilbur used against her, sounds like what my old partner would use against me. His actions, such as her having to clean and taking care of food, and amenities, were things i had to experience.

Abuse TW:

My old partner would physically abuse me through biting as well, he would claim that he just liked knowing i was his, and yet, like shubble, if i ever used our safe word, which happened so fucking often, he either wouldn’t listen, bite down harder on my neck, or fucking smile at me before letting go.

This got to the point that multiple times he had drawn blood from my neck, that i still have scars from today. And as i watch Shubble talk about her story which is ever so close to mine, I wonder that if I had watched this before, maybe i wouldn’t have stayed in that relationship.

I proceeded to stay in this relationship for 2 years before i realized how much harm he was doing to me, because i truly believed he loved me, because of all the lovebombing he would do.

End of Abuse TW:

And yet i felt pain aside from sympathy or memories, when learning of this, as the content Wilbur had put out had actually helped me out of this relationship, his music was pretty much all i listened to the months of healing after i got out and it helped, the art is good, and yet the author is one i cannot respect nor support in anyway now that i am aware.

i’d suggest watching this tiktok by @lasmanburg that really explains my thoughts and feelings on this

https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZTL1tb5Wg/

Right back to the content. I don’t believe that we should throw it all away, i don’t think that people should be deleting their art, fanfiction, or anything based on Wilbur. Because in the end it’s all art that we have created and interpreted and though the man who inspired it is horrible, all that has been made does not reflect his actions, but instead love and creativity from vast multifaceted community.

One can continue their writing and work because they are the ones creating it, not him, and besides most interpretations of him stray quite far from the source anyways

I think that one can continue to engage in his content as long as one does not directly support him, such as pirating his music, but personally at least right now listening to his music which brought me so much comfort-makes me feel sick. So think i’ll be taking a step back.

I don’t really know how to end this, i just needed to get my thoughts out honestly. I have therapy in an hour. I hope all of you who’ve made it to the end have a wonderful day and drink some water. I wish shelby well, and i’m glad she has been able to share this situation. And with that, I must now leave :)

#lil summary in the tags #alright so basically i don’t think people should delete their works based off of wilbur and that as long as one does not support him direct #engaging in previous content is okay #however i will likely not be posting about him anytime soon #also go check out #lasmanburg #because their videos have really helped me put my thoughts into words and i think their content is pretty swell #also if they are currently reading this hello! i hope tagging you isnt a bother #and if you’re uncomfortable i will remove it! #wilbur soot #william gold #shubble #tw abuse #i speak! #wilbur situation