#like I definitely did when I first saw legolas

[undreaming-fanfiction]

Established Steddie, they have been living together for over a decade, did their best to heal their wounds from the Upside Down and learn to enjoy life again. It's not easy but they do it.

When the Lord of the Rings movies come out, it's actually Steve who suggests watching them to Eddie. He really tries engaging with Eddie's passions, but his focus is not the greatest when it comes to books. That doesn't mean he doesn't listen to Eddie ramble about them though - he knows all about hobbits, second breakfasts, the culture of smoking in the Shire...Eddie admires a lot of characters from the books, but ever since experiencing the Upside Down fuckery, he actually admits that the hobbits had a point. Good food, even better company and good tobacco? What else does one need? It also inspires Steve a few years later to prepare a full day of hobbit-inspired meals for their trilogy marathon when the extended editions come out. But this is about their first time watching the movies.

They both go to the movie theater excited. Steve is familiar with most of the characters, including Eddie's self-admitted crush on Aragorn. And Steve can see why, he can see so much good in all the members of the fellowship. After the first movie, he's wiping his eyes because Boromir deserved better. Eddie has a lot to say about what was lost in adaptation, but Steve knows Eddie loves those movies and would cut off his only remaining nipple before missing the next ones.

The Two Towers have Steve rooting for the ents and he feels strangely touched about how everyone underestimates Pippin, yet it's him who gets the ents to march. He really can't pick a favorite character. He can't wait for the third movie.

They go to the premiere of the Return of the King with Eddie. They secretly hold hands in the last row, and Steve watches the ride of the Rohirrim with bated breath. He clenches his hand in Eddie's when Theoden gets gravely injured, but then Éowyn is there and...oh.

He is staring slack-jawed at the scene. Éowyn's large, terrified eyes, the towering frame of the Witch King. Her posture was fearful, crouched, but still she faced him. And something surfaces in his head, something he's long forgotten.

He's unusually queit when they come back home, he still loves the rest of the movie, almost cries at "my friends, you bow to no one,", then definitely cries at Frodo leaving the Middle Earth. But there is still that something and Eddie can sense it. When they're falling asleep together, Eddie finally asks him. And Steve's had enough time to process what he felt.

"When Éowyn faced the Witch King...it reminded me of what it felt like. I mean, for the first time. I know it's stupid because saw so much unnatural shit, but...it's the first time that I have hard time forgetting," he admits quietly. "She reminded me of me in 1983 so much. I had no clue what I was getting myself into. I thought I'd do the right thing, but then I had a gun pointed at me, they both had blood on their hands...and then it appeared."

Eddie doesn't speak, he only holds Steve closer.

"It was so tall. I remember that petal-like mouth, those teeth, but mostly...I remember the crippling fear. I felt absolutely terrified. I couldn't move. There was even a moment when I thought of running away, but...I couldn't leave them there. Seeing someone go through something similar and being praised for being a hero...it makes me think. I used to be so ashamed for freezing in that moment. For even considering running away. But Éowyn...she was like me." There's awe in his voice and warmth, relief. "She had no idea what she was getting into. She froze. She didn't do everything perfectly and gracefully like Legolas or something, but when it mattered...she did what she had to."

He holds Eddie tighter and asks, almost shyly: "Will it offend you that I think she's my favorite character? Not Aragorn or Sam?"

Eddie just shakes his head and drops a kiss to Steve's hair. "Nah. She suits you well. And you're both amazing."

And if it becomes a silly endearment in their household, that Steve is sometimes called the Shieldmaiden of Hawkins? ("I'm not a maiden, Eddie!" "I'm not calling you a shieldboy or shieldbachelor, Steve!") Then Steve feels a hint of something that he thought he'd renounced, but now, for the first time he feels it's deserved - pride.

#steve harrington #eddie munson #stranger things #steddie #steddie drabble #lord of the rings steddie #not proofread I'm sleep deprived af

[applegreenrunnerbean]

Oh Boy I've just come up with an exceptionally Cursed headcanon:

It's Gimli and Legolas who bring Maglor to Valinor

Maglor comes across Legolas and Gimli on a beach, desperately trying to make a boat based on their collective memories of Cirdan's ships. Gimli asks why can't they just ask the Men who, you know, definitely have boats, but Legolas is like No, It Has To Be Elven To Get There.

And Maglor has Boat-Related Trauma, but he's admittedly curious that Legolas is determined to take a dwarf with him. So he stays around to keep an eye on them, staying hidden of course. But like, Legolas is a tracker, he's from the Forest Known For Good Trackers, and definitely learnt stuff hanging around with Aragorn, so he definitely notices Someone is watching them. And Maglor, of course, notices that he notices, and then they're playing like a bizarre game of chicken as Legolas tries to spot Maglor, and Gimli is Fully Convinced Legolas is just going a bit nuts from their boat-building efforts.

Of course, in the end its Gimli who somehow provokes Maglor into revealing himself, maybe by speaking Sindarin with a semi-Feanorian accent, as he was taught by Arwen, who was taught by Elrond, who was brought up by Maglor himself? Legolas quickly captures Maglor - he's been waiting for this opportunity for WEEKS - and Maglor could probably escape if he tried, but his magic is fading, and he is so tired.

Legolas, of course, realises who Maglor is, but has to explain to Gimli, and his explanation is tangled in the two positions of "The Feanorians are scum and deserve everything they got" of his childhood, and "Yes they did bad things but, really the Doriathrim should reinforce their glass houses if they want to throw stones" of Elrond (and subsequently, Arwen, Aragorn, and most of "modern" First Age historians).

Gimli is confused, but he gets the gist that Thranduil's people hate Maglor, and that's a good enough recommendation for him (Gimli is never anything but unfailingly polite to Legolas' kin, much to their frustration).

Maglor becomes their 'prisoner' - mainly because Legolas is worried that if he turns up in Valinor and tells Elrond he saw Maglor and let him get away, he'll want to sail straight back again - and is tied up with a rope made by Galadriel that Legolas was saving for a special occasion. Maglor and Gimli communicate in a mixture of Sindarin and Westron (of course Maglor, the most linguistically inclined of Feanor's sons, would have at least picked up the new language in his millenia of wandering). Gimli is quite pleased to meet an elf who doesn't have any anti-dwarfism at all, and they get on quite well.

Despite previously mentioned trauma, Maglor is able to make some useful suggestions towards the boat-building effort - he has already made this journey the other way once, of course, and has been hanging around the coast for literal Ages. He makes all sorts of arguments as to why he shouldn't be taken with them - that he doesn't deserve it, that Valinor should not be cursed with his presence, that he will be a burden on them. When Legolas and Gimli have one of their many discussions about how, exactly, they are going to convince the Valar to let Gimli stay, Maglor argues that taking him with them would hinder their cause, as the Valar are still no doubt wroth with him.

At which Legolas looks at Maglor with a very sly smile and declares, why of course Lord Maglor, what an excellent idea! You shall serve as an excellent distraction so I can smuggle my dwarf in. Maglor doesn't have the heart to explain that that's not really how it works, in the face of Legolas' optimism (and it is so nice to meet an elf who is optimistic, who laughs and loves without fear). And, he justifies to himself, if his coming to Valinor can help these two in some way, then maybe his inevitable Casting Out by the Valar will be worth it.

So they set sail in the most peculiar-looking craft, which is part Cirdanian ship, part Mannish fishing boat, part Alqualonde swanship (Maglor is doing his best to ignore the irony). Maglor is mainly in charge of navigating, while Legolas does most of the actual sailing, and Gimli reminds the pair of them to eat and sleep, and tells Maglor stories of his people, of the reclaiming of Erebor (with interjections from Legolas who was actually there, thank you very much Gimli, and the Mirkwood elves had good reason to distrust Thorin in the end didn't they? (a very loud argument ensues, in which Maglor has to take over the helm, and is fully prepared for them to turn around to take Gimli back to Middle-earth, and is extremely surprised when, the next day, Gimli and Legolas tearfully apologise to each other and are back to being as sickeningly Married as before)), and of the War of the Ring.

Maglor has managed to stay relatively abreast of general goings-on, via eavesdropping - he tried to drown himself several times when he heard of Celebrimbor's fate, but Ulmo wouldn't let him - but it is different to hear first-hand accounts. He tries (and fails miserably) to seem impartial when ever Elrond is mentioned, and laughs, properly truly laughs, for the first time in Ages when Gimli tells him of Galadriel's gift to him.

They come in sight of Tol Eressea, and Legolas and Gimli are overjoyed that it worked, while Maglor is extremely anxious. But he senses Ulmo's presence in the water around him, and is calmed by it. He doesn't know if his understanding with Ulmo will extend to him being allowed in Valinor, but he appreciates it all the same. They aim for Avallone, not Alqualonde (for obvious reasons) but a wind blows them off course, and they end up landing (definitely not crashing) on the shores east of Taniquetil.

They are met by Manwe, who is not amused. Legolas is defiant, and Maglor is resigned, but it is Gimli who manages to talk Manwe round, speaking so eloquently and persuasively, in Sindarin, on not just his behalf, but Maglor's also, that Manwe, with some gently prodding from Ulmo in wave form, relents. He says Gimli can stay, though reminds him it is not indefinite, and when it is his time he must go to Mandos; and declares Maglor's fate shall be decided by the Noldor themselves, as the Valar have learnt not to meddle in Eldarin affairs when they are not wanted.

Manwe turns into the wind and leaves; and then a boat turns up, landing much more gracefully than Legolas', containing Elrond, Gandalf, and Finrod. The reunions are very emotional: Finrod surprises Maglor by wrapping him in a fierce hug, before letting Elrond take his turn. Maglor is ridiculously apologetic to Elrond, who declares him forgiven, and calls him atar, which makes Maglor break down in tears. Legolas and Gimli are saddened to hear the Hobbits made their way to Mandos a few decades ago, but are glad to see Gandalf and Elrond once more.

Then Finrod, very apologetically, says that he is technically here to arrest Maglor, but, on medical grounds (looking pointedly at Maglor's scarred hand and general state of dishabille) he can be released into Elrond's custody, immediately. They return on the ship (not Legolas', which is in bits) to Tol Eressea.

Later, when he's improved somewhat physically and mentally, Maglor is tried in the 'new' judicial system in Tirion (trial by jury has been used by Finarfin's justice department for good few millennia now, but its still considered 'new' for elves). He is, of course, found guilty of various war-crimes and acts of murder - though not of kidnapping, as Elrond convinces his blood-parents not to press charges, by threatening to never speak to them again.

However, the judge (carefully selected from the post-First Age elves, so as to be unbiased as possible) commutes his sentence, declaring Maglor's self-imposed penance enough, but that he must work to pay reparations to those he harmed. This is after Gimli gives evidence, in an impassioned and beautiful speech describing how Maglor was when they found him, how much physically and mentally he was suffering. The speech is so good it goes down in legend as a great piece of oration, made even more remarkable in that it was spoken by a dwarf, who could not call on an innate oratory power as elves do when public speaking.

Gimli goes on to have a fairly illustrious career as a diplomat and public speaker in Valinor, so much so that Manwe convinces Namo to delay bringing Gimli to Mandos three times, so as to not upset Valinorean politics. Gimli is celebrated as Carpalaure by the Noldor long after his passing.

#wow this got very long #silm #maglor #legolas #gimli #gigolas #valinor politics #silmarillion #gimli being a really good politician is one of my pet headcanons

[scyllas-revenge]

Tolkien ask game!

Thank you @ass-deep-in-demons and @hippodameia for tagging me! This turned out absurdly long and I apologize in advance.

How old were you when you read/watched LOTR for the first time: Watched the movies when they came out- I was 8 for the first one. Read the books at 11

Favourite LOTR character: Boromir, Eowyn, and Sam

Books or movies: I love them both in different ways! But I definitely engage with the movies more than the books

Favourite movie: Fellowship of the Ring. Favorite book is The Two Towers

Which location in Middle Earth would you want to visit most: The Shire! And Rivendell! And Minas Tirith! And Edoras! And- can I just go on a road trip to see everything?

Favourite scene: I have so many! Sorry in advance:

The Fellowship on Caradhras (book), with Legolas being a little shit and running off to find the sun while the text will not let you forget for a single second just how strong and beefy Boromir is

Sam in Shelob's lair (book)

Eomer and his men coming to the rescue in Helm's Deep (movie)

The Rohirrim riding to Gondor's aid at the Pelennor fields (also movie)

Faramir's flashback (extended edition), I wish we could have seen more of him and Boromir together

The bit from The Hobbit- yes I got out my book to find the scene- "It was at this point that Bilbo stopped. Going on from there was the bravest thing he ever did. The tremendous things that happened afterwards were as nothing compared to it. He fought the real battle in the tunnel alone, before he ever saw the vast danger that lay in wait." I loved that scene as a kid. I practically had it memorized lol. I'd never read a story that described a story that way, and it had this great larger than life feel to it

Shoot if I'm getting books out to reference things I may as well dig up this one too- in The Two Towers, one of the Nazgul flies overhead, and it's so dark that only its shadow is visible overhead, and Tolkien says "The stars fainted before it" which was such a simple line but aaaaah! I liked it so much when I first read it that it made me want to become a writer. The drama! The symbolism! The imagery!

Favourite quote: I'm sorry. I'm so bad at narrowing down my favorites!

Sam's speech in Osgiliath

"Look! The king has got a crown again!"

"I love him. He's like that, and sometimes it shines through, somehow. But I love him, whether or no."

"They have a cave troll" (yes I am basic as hell)

The entire conversation between Aragorn and Boromir in Lothlorien

What Middle Earth race would you want to be: oh god I want to be a hobbit I just know it would lower my blood pressure and cure my anxiety and clear my skin. I just want to bake a lattice pie and put it on the windowsill of a round window :(

Favourite LOTR ship if you have one: Farawyn is great of course. I'm also getting more and more into Boromir/Theodred. Although tbh I'd ship Boromir with any human who stands still too long

Tagging @sotwk and @marsharmonicorchestra and @brigwife and anyone else who wants to play!

[mischieffoal]

LotR Musical: round 2

This is just a stream of consciousness, and I won't pretend it's a review or anything, it's just extra thoughts I had the second time I saw the musical. This is from September 20th, I've also just posted my notes on 4th October's show

Pre-show

Picked up friends along the way - we were all cloakèd this time! I saw Kelly and told her I loved her Instagram takeover!

Sadly raining, But! The pre show was still done, just indoors!! Met and chatted to Legolas, and Bilbo, and LOBELIA and I gave her a SPOON. Loved that they came upstairs to talk to us, it was well done for what is clearly a back up option. They still had fun dancing and playing hoopla etc downstairs on the stage

New cast member joined literally last week (Zara Naeem) and she just looks so natural and like she's always been there! R described Rosie as "the most wonderfully hobbit like person" (round face, amazing hair, and sheer energy at Bilbo's party)

I really love the ringle dance at the beginning, I think I am even more impressed by it and how tight everyone's choreo is because they're mostly dance moves I know from ceilidhs etc. Also very fun and not sure if intentional or just in character that someone in one of the 5 hand stars ended up facing the wrong way

I absolutely love knowing who they all are now. Aragorn and Arwen were dancing together!! And Pippin is often in the background of the next few scenes, playing her mandolin. I am now so much more cognisant of the foot tap greeting like I loved it last time but now I know how it's done I'm obsessed

Bilbo introduces the story with the “tell us a story” but it's clearly meant to be self-deprecating. Bilbo disappeared into the carved doors, and there's entire smoke, lighting and sound effects that don't happen outside that make it magical in a different way!

Act 1

I'd forgotten that after the party Frodo just... stands by himself in Bag End for a bit. He's burning papers - I wonder why. Just standing and thinking to himself - sings "road flow past your doorstep". Sam comes in, has a chat, then Rosie enters as well, and they're off to the ivy bush (apparently a phrase meaning ‘in secret’??). They are clearly inviting Frodo along, and Frodo is clearly not wanting to third wheel them, but as E said, they are trying to make it obvious that this is a tricycle, Frodo! He doesn't go with them. They foot tap goodbye. 

Frodo carries on reading things, then hides what he's reading when Gandalf knocks...?? Frodo protecting Sam from Gandalf is very cute and also gorgeous parallels to Sam protecting Frodo from Gollum just before mount Doom

Sam packs Mrs. Bracegirdle's plum cake - this man is always thinking of rations unlike anyone else in the entire musical (also E did eventually come to like Mrs. Bracegirdle's ever growing bakery but was at first incensed because "Bilbo makes his own plum cake!")

I love Merry and Pippin. So much.

The elves' lighting is just gorgeous and wonderful and I love how obvious the elf moments are and the clear differences between Rivendell elves and Lothlorien elves, and that Legolas is different again from both of them (it helps with important character status but also that Mirkwood (the northern forests) is a different group of people). However. We couldn't see the elf speaking to Frodo for shit (too high up). Sitting at the back of the balcony was definitely better for comfort but we did miss anything high on the back of the stage

I LOVE Saruman's line "a Dominion of light"

E pointed out that no one has mentioned that Hobbits are a different species yet. Barliman's opening different doors is absolute nonsense if you don't know they're tiny. Bill Ferny being racist is helpfully telling the audience that they're not human. I loved watching so many different characters this time! I was definitely trying to see everything I could, and I loved seeing extra things, but I'm glad I'm going again so I can truly sit back and enjoy it more calmly

Glorfindel is played by Folarin, a bald black dude. Incredible. 

Arwen's song of hope is called "lullaby" in the score, so she's diegetically singing it to Frodo, whilst Aragorn watches on. At the council - the rotation is SO COOL I noticed multiple characters who spoke as they reached the point where they were facing the audience. Insane detail to do 

Star of Yarandil my beloved. Arwen's HANDS they are just ALL OVER THE PLACE. She gives each member of the fellowship a blessing, and she lingers looking at Aragorn as she goes on to bless Boromir... also the hand movements. Damn. She's casting spells/blessings with her song and hands, and the whole ensemble then picks it up as well. They're VERY precise - literally each finger is doing something different, and they all do it in unison

Holy shit quick change - the fellowship finish star of Yarandil at Rivendell with Elrond, he leaves, then comes back on practically immediately as Saruman. I continue to be very attracted to Elrond/Saruman. They both stand very upright, but they have such different affects that they're just so clearly different characters - how?!

Frodo's face. So many emotions. My god that man. Thank you Samwise - so I'm wiser than a wizard? Extremely epic burn. Gimli's song isn't long enough!! I really appreciate it but it doesn't get enough time to shine! 

The songs really aren't musical songs - no character development or plot moments or emotions boiling over into song. They're just people singing songs. Here is a song I'm going to sing you about a story that is completely irrelevant, whilst some other characters have conversations about an entirely different bit of exposition. And that's what Tolkien is all about.

Yeah, compared to Gollum's death, Gandalf's death is sadly underwhelming

The Lothlorien elves do bird calls and Legolas calls back to them!! Hurrah for the stiff necks of elves and dwarves. Why did the movie cut this. Pippin is adorable. E also thought Legolas was in love with galadriel. Musicals out of context, y'all. Loooove the bollywood dancing here. Pippin is SO in character ALL of the time. Her facial expressions and how she dances - she's followng the choreo precisely but it's still clearly PIPPIN. They all sing with their characters voices as well, which is actually i think very hard and you don't really notice it because it's so seamless, whereas it's so easy to be dragged out of the story by singing not matching speaking voice. Galadriel's songs are a bit less fun when you can only see her legs... 

No Anduin we go straight to Boromir. Realised that there's no real explanation of the ring’s power over him, he just seems like an arsehole. I think that's why it's key that Frodo is shown more obviously corrupted, otherwise there's just no reason to like him. The three hunters are so so sweet with his death. Quick stormy music afterwards, including evil piccolo we love it

Act 2

Interval, still very rainy alas. I love Gollum so damn much . Ent moot is not actually plumbing, it's specific pipes they've added. I really really liked the scene with Denethor but it just wasn't dramatic enough. Needs opulence and significant lighting and timing and stuff I think. But I like the bones of it. The *words* of a king are healing. I love the 4 of them fighting together it seems so desperate but hopeful. Fucking love Saruman dude

Now and for always is about how hobbits don't like change. In the stories, they come back from their adventures and everything goes back to the way it was. That won't really happen here. Sam sings it to Frodo when he's stressing about destroying the Ring and losing the elves. Gollum joins in the chorus whilst hanging *upside down*. It feels so meaningful when Frodo joins in

God Aragorn and Arwen"s duet is so hot, they're so in love with each other and in each other and they kiss and yesssss (but also imagine aragorn just singing the harmony to himself alone in a room somewhere)

So Frodo decides to take the ring,  runs away to shelob's lair. Shelob doesn't get enough time to shine. She's wonderful and we don't see enough of her. Also Sam's final stab is a brilliant piece of blocking but didn't even get a second to land.

Sam saves Frodo, helps him better takes the ring to stop his burden. Isn't at all affected. Frodo wakes up, Gollum returns, they say thief, they all fight, Sam gives in and gives the ring back, then Gollum attacks. Sam protects Frodo so hard, don't talk to me or my friend ever again. God I love him. 

Wonder (again we can't see her singing) is a combo last battle build up, Mordor walking, last battle into mount Doom. Legolas and Gimli promise each other if they don't die today :) four orcs fighting. Sam hoists Frodo on his shoulders and carries him through and it has SO MUCH WEIGHT. Denethor is killed. One of the orcs is playing the trombone

Once again, I LOVE gollum's fall. Frodo and Sam put their waistcoats on as soon as they get out of the volcano before they even collapse! Aragorn fucking caresses Frodo. Our lives are forever entwined or some ridiculous romantic thing

I love Rosie!!! She's coming next time! Also who's Galadriel should she be worried

"You love the morning and my love is given to the evening" (apparently this is a Gimli and Eomer line) "But I thought we'd do it together" Fucking tear my heart out why don't you.

Sam is the aro friend when their best mate gets a girlfriend. He didn't realise what Frodo meant to him. Didn't realise Frodo didn't realise it. But I thought we'd do it together. Sing a duet and break my heart, yeah

Also now I've heard it more the dance version of now and for always is a banger 

Post-show

And then after! We spoke to Aoife! Folarin! He said that I gave Lobelia a spoon! We took a photo and he signed my art! Aaron! Peter! Matthew! Aaah!! Everyone on the train home is still insane about it all!! Hobbit step goodbyes!!

#lotrm #tolkien #lord of the rings musical #lotr musical

[foralleternityidiot]

SHIPPER TAG GAME

tagged by @negrowhat

1. What ship were you completely obsessed with when you were a teenager, but now you don't care anymore?

Hmmmm. I wasn’t the biggest shipper as a teenager and all the ships I did obsess over still own my fucking soul. I ship for life.

2. Which ship would you consider your first one?

That’s a toss up between Monica x Chandler (Friends), Mulder x Scully (The X Files), Cory x Topanga (Boy Meets World), and Rick x Evie (The Mummy) I can’t remember which came first because they all were pretty simultaneous.

3. Your first fanfic belonged to which couple?

Romione. Although I remember dabbling in writing fan fiction in a spiral bound notebook at the age of 14, it was always sort of self-insert non-romantic LOTR character building. My first actual fanfiction (reading and/or writing) was Ron x Hermione when I was 19.

4. Do you remember the first couple you saw a fanart over?

100% LOTR… but I don’t remember which pairing. Probably like Frodo x Sam or Legolas x Gimli, but I didn’t get into MM shipping until I was a full blown adult about to finish college.

5. Did you ever get into ship discourse?

Somewhat when I was in the Glee fandom but that fandom was a clusterfuck of ship discourse. I pretty much lived on the corner of fuck off and leave me alone.

6. Did you used to have any no-otp or have it currently?

Maybe? But I didn’t really care too much about looking at anything outside my own ship OR I was a multi-shipper. So I don’t really remember a specific notp. I’m sure there were some though. There was so much trash in the glee fandom, I’m sure I hated something.

7. Who were the couple in the last fanfic you read?

I haven’t touched a fan fic in over 10 years so (I should get a chip!) the last one I read was likely Klaine. Holy shit wtf time has flown.

8. Currently, do you have any OTPs?

Approximately 1.9 billion. Oh you want names? Well Hualian (TGCF), Wangxian (MDZS) and most recently Ranning (2ha) are the top three out of the 1.9 billion. Remember, I collect ships and keep them in my heart for all eternity.

9. Is there any couple that, to this day, you are extremely mad about not getting together?

Sam x Jack (Stargate SG1). It’s somewhat implied but my god I still yearn.

10. Is there any ship you used to dislike but now you think they are kind of interesting?

I didn’t dislike Cory x Shawn but I didn’t really get it back in the Girl Meets World hay day and it wasn’t even on my radar at all during Boy Meets World. (Remember, I’m old and the internet was not what it is now during my youth so I didn’t even know about the Cory x Shawn ship for literally decades). Sometime after GMW ended and tiktok became popular there was a resurgence of BMW popularity and a lot of CxS analysis that opened my eyes. I enjoy the ship now but I’m still Cory x Topanga 4eva.

11. Do you have any ship that, in the past, was considered normal but now you would be cancelled over?

Tbh not really. I used to be pretty boring. I definitely have some in the present that would though. 🤐

12. What was your favorite crack ship?

There were so many in the Glee fandom but I gotta go with Sebastian x Cooper just because it brought two of my friends together in a RP group and they ended up actually getting married. Ah… memories. I’m gonna tag @believesinponds in this post for the nostalgia.

13. Who is the couple you read more fanfics of?

None. But if I did it would absolutely be wangxian or hualian. Don’t fucking tempt me.

14. What most of your ships usually have in common?

In the past: Canonical.

Now: Canonical and Queer.

15. What do you absolutely hate in a ship?

Im gonna keep was Eboni wrote because it’s spot on: “Miscommunication and the noble idiocy trope.”

I'll tag @believesinponds @linameka @ommited-miscellaneously @ipromisedthesunset @kennyomegasweave @youdontnohme

#tag game

[forerussake]

Shipper tag game

I was tagged by @dual-domination :DDD thanks!

What ship were you completely obsessed with when you were a teenager, but now you don't care about anymore?

Okay so this whole tag game is gonna be interesting, bc i'm not actually that much of a shipper. I don't really care about shipping for the shipping itself, if that makes sense. I care about the characters and their dynamic, and ships can be interesting for what the characters may or may not bring to each other. Anyway, that was all meant to preface that I don't remember if I really strongly shipped anything when I was a teenager... At the very least I don't think there's one I don't care about anymore. Most of the things I shipped as a teen would have been tolkien ships, and I still carry a great fondness for those even if I'm not an active creator in that fandom atm.

2. Which ship would you consider your first one?

As said above, likely something Tolkien-related?? Maybe Glorestor? I remember reading fics about them but I don't remember actively shipping them. Perhaps Finarfin/Eärwen, that is the earliest ship I remember caring about in a way that I might consider shippy??

3. Your first fanfic was about which couple?

Neither the first fanfic I ever attempted to write (sth about Legolas that I wrote with pen on paper when I was like 10) nor the first serious unfinished attempt (about Thranduil taking up the crown in the aftermath of his father's death) nor the first one I ever published (The Last Son, a character study about Finarfin) are about couples at all... My first one that is about a couple though is Broken, about Turgon and Elenwë, but that is not 'shippy' at all.

4. Do you remember the first couple you saw fanart of?

In Tolkien fandom circles, that will probably have been sth like Gigolas or maybe Glorestor, but I don't remember. The first I have active memory of is Angbang :D

5. Have you ever gotten into ship discourse?

No. I try to stay far away from that...

6. Did you use to have any NOTP or have one currently?

Maybe? There's definitely ships I don't care about, even ones that the rest of the fandom is all about, but there's very few ships I actively avoid. The only thing I actively filter out of my AO3 searches atm is anything that ships Ye Zun and Shen Wei together. That's just not for me... But that is what we have the exclude tags button for, so others can enjoy what they enjoy and you can too :) I also avoid the Pingxie tag like the plague, bc I've seen one too many people in the fandom have bad opinions, but I wouldn't call them a NOTP. It's more a 'missing a third party (namely Pangzi)' kinda deal for me xD

7. Who were the couple in the last fanfic you read?

My mind immediately went to Weilan, but then I remembered that actually it's Zhubai <3 Both are a very likely answer to this question at any given moment.

8. Currently, do you have any OTPs?

See above! Weilan for sure, and definitely also Zhubai (and the extended polycule in the whole of and i will make a silence for you, for which I am eternally grateful to mumble and Sam) <333

9. Is there any couple that, to this day, you are extremely mad about not getting together?

No. As I said before, I'm not really a shipper. I don't consume media in that way. The story is the story, I don't see a reason to get mad about it. If you're unhappy with canon, you throw it in the trash and start writing AU fanfiction. It's not that deep.

10. Is there any ship you used to dislike but now you think they are kind of interesting?

Nah.

11. Do you have any ship that, in the past, would've been considered normal but now you would be cancelled over?

Idk, I suppose some people these days would cancel me over my RPF ships? I've also read a lot of Tolkien fanfic back in the day with ships that the modern purity-police would probably like to put me on a stake over (Celegorm/Curufin(/Finrod), maybe Silverfisting (when we still had the collective guts to call it that) and such.) Look, I was there for all the Yuri On Ice ship wars (that I didn't participate in, mind you), don't @ me with your anti bullshit. Fiction is fiction. Reality is reality. Go touch some grass.

12. What is your favorite crack ship?

I don't think I have one. Crack is not my fanfic genre.

13. What is the couple you read the most fanfics about?

Weilan probably ranks high by now, as does Zhubai. I've read a lot of Silverfisting and Curufin/Finrod in my day. I've read everything that was in the Finarfin/Eärwen tag up until a couple years ago, but that is a rarepair (even though it's canon... that's what you get when your OTP are only mentioned by name 3 times in the whole entire book). Xiyao and Nielan and 3zun are probably high on the list as well. I don't know who wins it, bc I only started keeping track of my reading habits with bookmarks in the past couple years so I have almost no data about the amount of fic I read before my Guardian days.

14. What do most of your ships usually have in common?

Uuhm, often there's something potentially fucked up about the dynamic. Some friction. A certain level of codependency or otherwise unhealthy attachment is interesting to me (how do they work through that? can they?). Most important though is just the deep affection they have for each other. I'm really big on like, choice and consent and free will. When characters could've chosen to part, and it might have even been easier for them to try and let go, but they decide the pain is worth it and they want to work on themselves and the relationship to make it work? When they love each other so much it dwarfs all else, but they still make the active choice to be vulnerable and share that love? That's my jam :)

15. What you absolutely hate in a ship?

Why do we have to end on a negative :(((( hhhm, okay i guess the lack of the above. I hate the soulmate trope with a passion, because so often it erases the element of choice from a relationship. "These characters were meant to be together" okay that's cute but do they want to be? I dislike it when a ship is written in such a way (either by the canon author or by fans) that it takes away the agency from the characters. I'm all for characters living for each other, but there must be meaning behind it. It can't just be fate. It has to be choice. For that matter, when a fandom collectively decides one ship is the way to go and all else is wrong and sucks, that is when I jump ship, because that ship is sinking.

Thanks again for tagging me, this was fun!

Tagging: @pangzi @lucientelrunya @programmedradly @the-marron @lunarriviera @scaredysap @mjsakurea @elenothar @lynne-monstr @aredhel-of-doylkien @thedaughterofshadows if you want to <3

#tagged #shipping #tag game

[tathrin]

i’m so in love with your AU, especially the parts where Gimli is being influenced / hearing the whispers of his ring!! i love hearing Gimli’s inner workings and thoughts as he’s further being corrupted. im not sure where I got the idea that dwarves are more resilient to the influence of the ring (not sure if this is from canon or fanon or just vibes ach) but it’s really fascinating to read your story with the thought that dwarves are resilient (ESPECIALLY GIMLI!!! the knight in shining armour who in the movies literally immediately tried to destroy the ring) and seeing just how far gone Gimli has gone to justify the corruption to himself. its like Gimli is an unmoveable rock and his ring Knows This, so it has chipped away at him slowly, until he withered away and has become something unrecognisable. given what it took for legolas to recognise gimli fully and completely (him taking off his ring) it seems this is already in effect!! but somehow though despite the corruption and the pain going on here i still Trust gimli, isn’t that insane? 😅 it’s like yeah he’s definitely being influenced by evil energy and yeah he’s committed war crimes but also he’s Gimli so that’s okay 🫶 no but in all honesty i feel like how legolas did first seeing him, couldn’t recognise him at first but once i did i flinched back in fear at the dark lord of erebor i saw!! (but also i just feel like when it comes to gimli i cant lose hope!) maybe he snaps out of the evil influence, maybe he falls further into its hold!! who knows what’s gonna happen in this AU? cant wait to read more! <3 (also many apologies for the HUGE chunk of text 😅)

Oh my gods don’t APOLOGIZE for this, I am flailing over it. I am writhing on the floor making happy screams. Thank you ahhhh I am so glad you like it, thank you! And I’m going to respond by rambling my ass off at you, so I hope you don’t regret it too much ahaha. But like. yes! Gimli IS the knight in shining armor! The unmovable rock! The incorruptible pillar! But now...

Well, now I have to justify a dark take on him in this weird-ass AU idea that bopped me on the head out of nowhere lmao. So I’m going to just gush my thoughts out at you incoherently, and see if I can A: get them a little more concrete in my head and B: see what you think! (This is what you get for engaging with me I’m so sorry. You stuck your finger through the cage and now I’m gnawing on it excitedly lol.)

You’re right about Dwarves and the Rings btw, the original Seven Rings couldn’t corrupt the Dwarves the way they did Men (no Ringwraithdwarves lol) they basically just gave them Severe Goldsickness, iirc. But! it’s not gold that Gimli wants! Over him gold shall have no dominion. So that wouldn’t be a very viable way of getting to his heart, silly Ring. So basically where my head went was, the Rings work by corrupting a person’s goodness not by just like. mustache twirling mwa-ha-ha evilness, right? They get to you by offering you what you want, not what the Dark Lord wants; that’s how they hook you, anyway, and then it shifts and drags you down with it into what It wants...but that’s how it starts.

With Frodo, the way the Ring got to him was through him showing Gollum mercy, basically: the whole “I won’t kill you, but if you attack me again you’ll be thrown into fire!” thing. Sure it was wearing him down all along in little ways, but that was where the Ring got its final major defining “in” with him. With Boromir, it was “hey do you want strength to defend your city?” and yeah, of course he does! Who wouldn’t? That’s a viable desire!

So with Gimli, Durin’s Ring has really been working with not a lot so far, tbh.

It’s certainly been enacting influence! Twisting, corrupting, cajoling; chipping away, as you said. A year ago, he wouldn’t have been able to bring himself to do X...but a year ago, he had to do Y. And doing Y makes doing X easier to bear; that’s how corruption works. And the Ring has certainly been working hard. But it just hasn’t been able to get much of a grip.

Because Gimli is compromising his sense of right and wrong for the sake of the greater good, sure; but that was less about the Ring on his hand luring him in than it was about the fact that all of Middle-earth has been conquered by a Dark Lord, so there are no good choices left. Do you defy Gondor and watch your people be slaughtered on the altar of your pride? Or do you bend your knee and try to keep them alive as best you can? Gimli chose the latter, and that’s led to a terrible (and slowly corrupting) struggle, because he has to side with evil “for the sake of his people” and accept, allow, and sometimes even order evil things done, and there’s no good way off that road to hell once you start walking it (especially in Tolkien) — but he hasn’t really needed (or wanted) the power of the Ring. Yet.

Now all of a sudden here’s Legolas in chains before him, and elves are the one thing in Middle-earth who don’t get the option of “bend your knee to the bad guy and live, or defy him and die” — for them, it’s just die. And of course Gimli doesn’t want to stand back and watch Legolas die. But maybe Gimli can save him! He’s the Lord of Erebor! He has a Ring of Power! He should be able to do something to save him...right!?

And that’s how the Ring is (finally!) getting its big “in” with him here.

He’s already compromised himself so much, he thinks; he’s already got so much blood on his hands, spilt to save his people. He’s watched children in Dale starve, because he doesn’t dare give them food the Dark Lord doesn’t think their people have earned. He’s watched Mirkwood burn and stood behind his walls and done nothing. He’s let elves be worked to death in his mines. He’s accepted a Ring of Power, and all it’s done has been to leave him even more powerless than before. He’s stood back while good people were executed, because nothing he said could have saved them and daring to try would have only made more trouble for the people depending on him. He’s pledged his allegiance, and that of his people, to a monster for the sake of making sure the dwarves who rely on him live to see another day. He’s already damned. So what else does he have to lose?

Well. Legolas’s life, as it turns out. And if the Ring can save him...well.

Gimli is such a good, strong person. He’s never wanted power for himself, or lordship, or anything like that. He just wants to save people, to protect them. And just like with Boromir, the Ring is going to offer him the power to do that, and that might be what pushes him over the edge from slowly damning himself by making the best of increasingly bad choices...to falling off the edge into total darkness.

But we’ll see! I have no idea where this story is going to go, so maybe it’ll be a story of salvation! Or maybe it won’t. We get to find out together. Yay?

#you have the best insights into gimli #i am gnawing on my fingers to know what you think ahhh #galadrielspeaks #gimli #gimli dark lord of erebor au #lotr #lotr au #my writing #gimleaf

[reputationdamiano]

hi!

could i request a damiano imagine where the reader is insecure/ has an ed? in need of smt sad 2 read

smaller than this

pairing: damiano david x reader

warning(s): tw ed, body dysmorphia, insecurities, self hate, one or two curse words

word count: 1081

a/n: i have struggled with that type of things too, i mean i was never diagnosed but i definitely have body dysmorphia. i think now it’s better with eating but the self-hate hits hard often ��� sorry for writing this 10 months after u send that request! but here it is!

i also want to thank lovely @bidet-and-legolas for proofreading, ily 🫶

i wish i was smaller than this

you were standing in front of the mirror, staring at your body with disapproval. you saw all of your flaws clearly. thighs bigger than the rest of your body, their upper part covered in stretch marks. one look at them and you didn’t want to eat for a week.

i can’t go out dressed like this. no way.

you headed back to your room, removed your shorts and threw them on your bed. then you took out a pair of material trousers.

having been on the verge of tears for so long, you finally broke down. what was wrong with you? despite all the restricting you did for the past ten days, it seemed that you haven’t lost even a pound of fat from your legs.

you had the urge to measure every part of your body and compare the results to those of supermodels. you would sell your soul to be skinny. but there you were, with a bmi of 19.5, which was a healthy one from the medical point of view but to you, your lower body was awfully fat. you sniffled. how was that even possible?

get yourself together and be more consistent. eat less, workout everyday. you won’t reach your goal if you give up now.

these sick ideas have been in your head for a few years, waiting for the right moment to come out. like now, when it was summer and you stayed in rome with your boyfriend damiano before his band leaves to continue their summer tour.

it was easier at the beginning of your relationship. you spent your time getting to know your boyfriend instead of worrying about the number of calories in your dinner. later, during colder times of the year, you were preoccupied with your job projects, plus the temperature outside wasn’t encouraging you to show your legs to the world.

going back to your so-called ‘diet’, which in reality was strongly restricting your intake, made you feel like you had control over something in your life. you patted yourself on the back every time you talked yourself out of eating. damiano had been too busy to notice. in fact, he didn’t know about your eating disorder in the first place. you were in treatment before you even met him so he couldn’t have suspected that you were relapsing.

you decided to get up to change into different clothes and redo your makeup that was destroyed by all that weeping. just as you finished getting ready, damiano came in. you took a deep breath.

i must keep him out of this.

“hi, y/n” he said and hugged you. “are you ready to go?”

“hi dami. yes, let’s leave” you forced a smile onto your face. he took your hand and you got into his car. that day damiano planned to take you out on a date to make up for how little time he had spent with you lately.

your favorite album was playing but all you felt was stress because this surprise date may include eating.

damiano asked you about your day and shared new info about the tour but your mind had been on one thing: how to eat as little as possible without being suspicious.

you noticed that you were slowly driving out of the city. at some point your boyfriend turned left into an old country road.

where the hell are we going? you thought.

you didn’t ask, however, because you already reached your destination: a completely empty beach by the river. the sky was pink without a single cloud on it and the view was breathtakingly beautiful.

damiano stopped the car

“and what do you think?” he asked, grinning.

“it’s such a beautiful place, wow” you replied, in awe of your surroundings.

“far from the city, just for us” your boyfriend added while taking out a blanket and a basket full of food out of the trunk.

a basket full of food?

oh no, not this

you started to panic. damiano quickly unfolded the blanket and made a comfy place for you to sit.

you didn’t see anything healthy and low in calories to eat, except for a few fruits. grabbing one, you hoped that damiano wouldn’t notice how little you would eat tonight.

“y/n, please have a piece of brownie, it’s your favorite” he said, looking at you softly.

“i’m not hungry, thanks dami” you said, trying to sound as convincing as possible. “i ate at home”

i’m so screwed up but he can’t know about this

“but there was nothing much in the fridge” your boyfriend pointed out. he was already worried and suspecting something.

fuck. i’m doomed

“y/n, what’s going on?” damiano enquired.

“nothing, why?” you said but your voice was shaking. you weren’t such a good manipulator as you thought.

you were at your wits‘ end.

“y/n, you know you can tell me everything” damiano didn’t give up on the conversation.

you felt like you had a lump in your throat. in that moment, you knew you had to tell him.

your boyfriend was looking at you, waiting for your answer.

“um.. i…” you couldn’t finish the sentence because the tears started falling down your face.

damiano took you in his arms. his embrace was your ultimate comfort.

he’s the love of my life, he deserves to know

“damiano, there’s something you should know about me… i have problems with eating” you opened up and told him the whole story, from your first struggles in high school and treatment to your most recent relapse.

“amore, you’ve been through a lot. i admire your strength. please remember you’re the most divine and gorgeous person in my eyes. i wouldn’t change a single thing about you, you’re perfect” damiano whispered. you were cradled in his arms like they were your safest shelter.

“nevertheless, you need to seek professional help. i’ll arrange everything for you, i promise. we’ll get through this together” he stopped speaking to kiss you slowly and softly. all of your negative thoughts disappeared during that wonderful moment.

“and remember, you deserve to eat no matter what, okay? i’m going to check up on you everyday, beautiful. i adore every piece of you and this will never change”

“dami, you mean everything to me. i’m so sorry for all that has happened” you said

“there’s no need to apologize y/n. you complete me. i’ll never let you go”

taglist: @ethanesimp @zuzamy @mywritingonlyfans @kirstansworld @gretavanfleetlove @otaculo @bieberhoodforever @kyliesalvatore @dont-let-me-drown-in-you @bidet-and-legolas @hopelessromantic727 @ilwiwbysmv @lovelymaneskindays @grzybowysyn @butkutee

masterlist

you can add yourself to my taglist here

reblogs and comments appreciated 🤍

#catalina writes #catalina’s imagines #tw ed #tw insecurity #måneskin #maneskin #maneskin fanfiction #maneskin fluff #damiano david fluff #damiano david imagine #damiano david fanfiction #damiano fanfic #damiano david headcanon #damiano david x reader #damiano david #maneskin headcanons #maneskin x reader #maneskin fandom #maneskin imagine #damiano maneskin #maneskin fic #maneskin fanart

[potatounderthemountain]

Hello! I have a request for some LOTR headcanons :)

How do you think the Fellowship (+faramir and boromir of course because they're my boys and I hate seeing boromir be left out) would react to seeing a really pretty girl, as in a 'love at first sight' kinda situation? The kind of person who seems so pretty and interesting that you need to go up and talk to them, if not just to compliment them. How would each of them handle it? Would they compliment, flirt, stand there awkwardly?

I once saw a girl wearing a suit and she was so pretty that I literally couldn't move. I just stopped right where I was and stared at her because I couldn't look away. It took 3 days to recover from lol

Anyways, I'd love to see your thoughts on this! Have a great day, keep up the good work!

Hi, sorry it took me forever to reply but definitely!

How the fellowship would fall in love at first sight

Aragorn

Is entirely taken aback

“a ranger caught off his guard?” yes most definitely

Hesitant to approach her at first, but trusts his heart enough to do so. 

Oddly more quiet than usual around her

Introduces himself very seriously

Probably makes some remark about the night sky

Doesn’t necessarily flirt as much as he just makes conversation

Will get totally flustered if the girl picks up on it and starts to flirt with him

over all, very chill and put together

Legolas

His ears blush when he sees her

But he isn’t entirely caught off guard

Not awkward in the slightest, as per usual

Shows his interest by staying close to her physically, and protecting her while on their journey

Probably won’t have much to say, but the look in his eyes and the time spent close to her says it all

Gimli

Very confident

even a bit over confident you might say

Not flustered or embarrassed, but very straight foward.

“Mi’lady, I couldn’t help but notice your gracefulness and striking beauty. I know you don’t know me, but I couldn’t leave here without telling you so.”

His assertiveness could almost be seen as... charming?

Still very respectful

Boromir

Also rather confident

But also a little flustered 

Is not afraid to approach her and say how he feels

But also might trip over his feet while on his way to do so

Still very charming though

Faramir

Finds himself staring quietly, almost like he’s fallen into a trance

Will find a quiet and subtle way to approach her

Or honestly might just continue to stare and never actually do it

But if he did, he would probably start a conversation first 

and then move on to the compliments

also very charming

Frodo

Not very confident

extremely shy

doesn’t want to confront his feelings

Sam has to push him to approach her

Not as awkward as he thought he would be

Shows affection by spending quiet time with her

Finds himself smiling for the first time in a long time

Sam

Is staring from a distance

Does not want to approach her whatsoever

Would rather just stare dreamily 

Frodo catches him staring

Sam denies everything but starts blushing

Frodo quite literally shoves him in her direction

Sam tries to make small talk, stumbles over his words, somehow begins blushing even harder

But it works because she things it’s adorable

Merry

Is hesitant about his feelings, but only for a moment

Decides to seem as impressive as possible

Tries to talk about a deep, academic topic

Totally messes it up

Luckily she thinks it’s adorable and they start talking about ordinary things

Pippin

Talks to Merry about it first

Merry gives him a pep talk to boost his confidence

May have boosted it a little too much

“Do you believe in love at first sight? Or should I walk by again?”

“Sir you’ve walked past me like three times already.” 

#LOTR #lord of the rings #lotr fanfic #aragorn #legolas #frodo #gimli #boromir #faramir #samwise gamgee #merry brandybuck #pippin took #the fellowship of the ring

[iamthecomet]

coooommmeeeeeeeetttt

i saw your reblog- you’re a lotr fan?!

those are my all time favourite movies. like, nothing tops that trilogy for me. i can quote a major monologue from every movie i am insane over them! they are a go to with my family, i used to curl up with my parents and we’d watch the extended editions, my uncle would put them on when he babysat my sibling and i. oh the memories 🥹 i rewatch them every couple of months. and i sob when i finish return of the king. every. damn. time.

i don’t actually have anything substantial to say, i just love finding more Tolkien nerds lol. i did a book report on return of the king in eighth grade and i own a replica of arwen’s necklace!

anyways, i hope you have a lovely day/night/whenever you see this 🖤🖤🖤

YES! I love LOTR. I know probably every line to the original trilogy. and I also cry every single time I watch ROTK. I saw it for the first time when I was like 9 or 10 (right after it came out) and it changed my entire brain chemistry and I have never recovered. I was majorly obsessed with Legolas for several years. He was all I thought about. LOTR was definitely the first fandom I wrote fanfic for (and did anything with). I posted it on FF.net when I was like...11 (people did not like it, big surprise there) but it all just means so god damn much to me still. I read the Silmarillion last summer which was not super fun, but really rewarding.

We can talk about LOTR literally ANYtime you want. My partner suggested watching the trilogy again the other day and now I can't get the need for it out of my head. So I'll be doing that very very soon. They're such comfort movies for me. ♥

#comet comments #pulling teeth #not ghost #lotr

[galadrielspeaks]

Tagged by @tathrin thank you!!!!

Share the first lines of ten of your most recent fanfics and tag ten people.

Don’t have ten? No problem! Share one you love.

Quite a few of these are from drafts that are almost complete but I am waiting until Spring Break / Summer to finally have some time off school to focus on finishing them, so you are definitely getting a sneak peak at some fics! I even have a line from the 'Shroom Incident' fic I finally started writing (but I wont say which it is ;)

These aren't ranked in any certain order, here we go!

“Bold of you to ask a Dwarf to drop his pipe! But brave you have proven yourself to be.” [Unreleased]

“For all the knowledge and wiseness of Dwarfs, you’d figure they would understand two things can co-exist at the same time.” [Unreleased]

“I wish I could say your work is perfect for his final resting place, but perfection would be my arms holding him into eternity." [x]

“You do not know the fear I had of forgetting your features, in the face of the eternity of these halls.” [x]

“I personally would think that the very first thing I thought you of importance was to not wet the bed, but to each their own.” [x]

Legolas stumbled in between the elves as they began their journey, completely unaware of where they were taking him- but excited to be going nonetheless. [x]

Suddenly, the spectators became aware of just who these two creatures were: centuries old royals who lived through events that mortals regard as legends- and they were about to fight. [Unreleased]

Legolas figures his Father must have been like this before he was born- or perhaps even further back- back when Oropher was still here and the light shone brightly through the leaves, before the darkness had truly touched his home and his Mother still roamed the woods. [Unreleased... but not for much longer ;) ]

He made eye contact with the Elf-Lord over Glorfindel’s shoulder, speaking in Sindarin. “You never did like to fight your own battles. Very well. Shall we dance?” [Unreleased]

“You will die if you stay, Gimli!” ... “And you will die alone if I don’t.” [Old Draft of a LONGGG AU that I worked on for a while and eventually discarded but... I have an emotional attachment to it and refuse to delete it... Let me know if you want to know more about it!!]

Tagging anybody who hasn’t already been tagged yet who writes as well! I wanna see what you guys got!!

Off the top of my head I can only think of @lesbianhaleth (I may be confused but I could've sworn I saw you do this already but if not, here's a tag :D )

#tag game #fics

[dunadaan]

uuuuuguguhhhh i hit the biggest snag in my grey company fic yet, which i KNEW would be a big headache but not this big.

i love the lotr films and the books but i like the films a little more- there’s a lot more breathing room and things are slowed tf down. The books are almost non stop action and travel (except when they rest for a month or two lol), and then as soon as they leave lorien they literally never stop moving and it is SUCH a big pain in the ass. (more under the cut if anyone wants to hear the ramblings of a mad woman)

in the books, pippin looks into the palantir, finds out about MT. they all ride like fucking mad men, but gandalf takes pippin to MT, theoden and GC retreat to helms deep. aragorn looks into palantir at helms deep and sees the black ships, and realizes elronds words- they have 10 days before MT falls maybe. theoden leaves first, to arrive at edoras ---> dunharrow but takes the “mountain paths”. aragorn and co and GC leave at dawn. “and while theoden went by slow paths in the hills, the Grey Company passed swiftly over the plain, and on the next day in the afternoon they came to Edoras, and there they halted only briefly, ere they passed up the valley, and so came to Dunharrow as darkness fell.” (ROTK 765) everyone pretty much knows what theyre doing, and gets it done without waiting. aragorn gets to dunharrow first, goes through paths, theoden arrives like a day or two later or smth im too lazy to delve further.

in the films though the palantir scene is delayed until after the return to Edoras with everyone and they even get a party! yay! the GC deserve a good party! especially after the shit theyve just been through lol. so the morning after pippin gets fried by the palantir, gandalf has a little meeting to tell everyone what happened. also the whole bit with Theoden being like uhm...what do we owe gondor...bitch! idk if i’d keep cuz it’s just so ooc but i get why they have it for the films they need that conflict and delay. but anyways, gandalf tells aragorn about the ships, presumably from what pippin told him about what he saw in the palantir, rather than aragorn looking into it himself. or maybe the brief moment he touched it aragorn did see it but w/e. anyways. but he doesnt tell him about the paths, elrond does (elrond is 100% cut sorry lol)

so like everyone has to sit on their ass in edoras while waiting for the beacons after Gandalf gets there (which btw fucks up my timeline so severely i’m wondering if i shouldn’t even bother with my calendar anymore bc i want the film pace in the beginning, shit NEEDS to slow down and they need a fucking break!!!!!! the GC asses are sore!!). the issue is this-- Aragorn knows he must “follow the river and look for the black ships” but not how. They all stay in Edoras sitting and farting and they all go together to Dunharrow once the beacons are lit, rather than separately. And then Elrond comes (don’t even get me STARTED on this scene i love elrond but it makes NO SENSE!!) and tells him hey. use the ghosts. not the women that could probably fight if anyone gave them a chance lol. and THATS what spurs aragorn to go through. and then legolas spouts the prophecy of malbeth which excuse me, why does he know, mirkwood bumpkin.

so now I have this dilemma of information- it’s a matter of when its given, not the information itself. The Grey Company’s whole purpose is A. to aid Aragorn in the hour of his need, at his own (subconscious) behest, and B. bring the words of Elrond to him: Bid Aragorn remember the words of the seer, and the Paths of the Dead. Why would Aragorn and the GC pause at Edoras to party if they know to go that way? If they’re back at Edoras, they don’t know that MT is the next target because Pippin only looks then, not when they’re just outside the Fords of Isen. So are the words nonsensical until they learn from the palantir? I would say maybe they don’t know quite yet where the paths are, but Aragorn in the books definitely happens to know, and in the films he stumbles on it by going with Theoden. I dont think Aragorn could rest much if he knew the words of GC, he’d be mulling them over for a while and then just leave w/o Theoden like he does in the books to get there faster once he did know....maybe we can pretend the info was lost, or Aragorn doesnt mention it until they get to dunharrow to theoden...? who tf knows. its 2am though and my brain is mush and my desk is strewn with maps and timelines and the books so. perhaps a thought for tomorrow

#the big grey company fic #im literally just thinking out loud sorry it helps me brainstorm solutions #im sure there is a way to solve this but rn my brain is like melting #and anyways my whole outline is literally me having multiple diverging solutions #listing them all and then not choosing one and just continuing on LOL #cuz its better to get it all down for the extremely rough outline of events and then go back/make a new doc when ive narrowed stuff down #blending the books and the films is really hard ok i get why they cut the grey company and it makes sense and was for the best #but i dont forgive them for it...

[boardboxes]

there is nothing I wouldn’t give to be a hobbit living in the shire eating 7 meals a day and going to parties all the time

everybody always like “ohhh I wanna be an elf they’re so sexy and cool” sure but they’re miserable and lame, so I’m gonna be a chubby hobbit wearing no shoes and living it the fuck up 24/7

#no shade to tyril hes sexy and cool but used to be a brat #why would anybody want to be an elf #like I definitely did when I first saw legolas #and miss Galadriel #but then I thought about it and being a hobbit seems like a ton of fun #small and rowdy

[anaveragebibliophile]

All For Him

Young!Legolas x Thranduil x Wife!Reader 

Summary: Lord Elrond comes to Mirkwood to ask a favor of his oldest friend, Thranduil. However, the stoic, unyielding king isn’t as willing to follow through on the request because of the danger it will put his family in. 

Honestly, when you stumbled into your husband’s study that morning, you didn’t expect to feel so puzzled and flabbergasted. You didn’t anticipate Thran’s summons to be anything more than a request for information about Legolas (which you were happy to provide), a question regarding supper, or an idea for date night. So the last person you expected to see was Lord Elrond, the ruler of Rivendell, arguing with his trusted confidant and friend of many eons near the balcony. 

“Thran, what’s going on? Is everything alright?” you queried as you stepped into the room, incisors biting into your lower lip. 

“Queen (y/n), what a pleasant surprise,” Lord Elrond replied, consequently ending the argument, as he walked over to take your wrist and place a chaste, respectful kiss on the back of your hand. “My sincerest apologies for not seeking you out sooner.” 

“That’s quite alright, Elrond. You know that. I too wish I had known you were here earlier, but I unfortunately got sidelined. We took a short walk in the gardens this morning, all three of us, when Legolas ended up tripping on a very small rock. Thranduil and I tried to utilize the open--and what we thought was a safe--space as a way for him to grow more comfortable walking without our help. That strategy worked well for us. Until today. None of us had seen the ant-sized pebble roll over his tiny heel, making him lose his balance and unknowingly place his hand on a grounded bee’s stinger to stabilize himself.” 

“My goodness! How is he doing?”

“As well as can be expected. As he got himself up, he whimpered a little bit which isn’t normally like him. Even if he takes a tumble, he’ll usually still maintain his normal demeanor--sweet, timid, and smiley. But once we saw his palm start to swell up, we knew something was wrong. Thran rushed him to the healer, who was more than willing to keep an eye on him. Ever since then, he’s been given herbs to reduce the swelling and irritation at the site of the wound as well as water to keep him hydrated. Thank you for asking.”

Once you finished sharing that traumatizing experience, you looked over to your husband, whose face was devoid of color. Out of the two of you, he had been the most panicked over Legolas’ well-being. ‘Is he breathing?’ he’d asked. ‘What if he has a reaction to the toxins?’ he’d wondered. ‘What if we didn’t get him to the healer’s quarters in time?’ he’d said, voice cracking under all the emotions. Unfortunately, the man is an aggressive worrier who feels the most stress when he’s involved in a situation that’s completely out of his control. His son inadvertently getting stung by a bee? Yeah, definitely an event that drove your husband up a wall. 

“He’s doing fine, Thran. He and I cuddled in his rocking chair for about twenty minutes before he fell asleep. Before that though, he did want me to tell you that he loves you,” I said, trying to soothe him as best as I could given the circumstances. 

Even though Legolas is still quite young and not fluent in Sindarin yet, he does have a few sentences that he likes to use every now and again. His favorite though is ‘gi melin’, the Sindarian version of ‘I love you’. Anytime he’s reunited with you or Thran, he’ll smile so wide (with his one tooth showing itself off) and almost shout the words out (as if you won’t hear him clearly without that extra pizzaz). Both you and your husband agree that it’s probably the sweetest thing your little leaf has ever done (and Legolas is the epitome of sweet). 

“I love him too. More than life. Which is why I cannot allow Sauron’s ring and its company to enter Mirkwood. I am sorry, Elrond, but my answer is final. You will not be able to change my mind on the subject,” your husband said. 

“Sauron’s ring? So young Frodo is alive then, is he not? I heard about your daughter saving him from the hands of the Nazgûl but wasn’t sure of its veracity,” you mentioned.  

“Yes. He is recovered and wishes to continue on the quest to destroy the ring at Mount Doom. However, we are trying to avoid the company’s traveling in the open at night and are looking for places for them to seek refuge. I am trying to convince Thranduil to offer his kingdom, but it seems that that has been more difficult than I originally presumed. He fears for your safety and Legolas’ too much.” 

Speaking of Legolas, a soft knock on the door soon presented you with the little leaf in the arms of his nanny, Elva. 

“Legolas, darling, what are you doing up so early?” I asked, my lips perking up into a small grin. 

“Ada, Nana!” he blubbered, pointing to us. “Gi melin, gi melin, gi melin.”

“I apologize, Your Majesties. As you can see, the prince woke up a bit early from his nap. All of the maids attempted to keep him occupied in his chambers, but it was no use. He only wanted to see his nostairi (parents),” Elva explained. 

“That is quite alright, Elva. I have not seen enough of him today. Thank you for bringing him to us,” your husband responded, moving over as Legolas reached out for him, and, once in his arms, began snuggling into his chest. “Hello, iôn nîn. I hope you slept well.”

“How’s his hand, Thran?” 

Your husband took your question as an opportunity to lightly pull Legolas’ right arm out from where it was hiding in front of his stomach. “It is still a tad swollen but not too severe.” 

You let out a sigh of relief. “That’s good to hear.” 

“Nana, gi melin,” your son whispered behind your husband’s robes. 

“Oh, my sweet boy,” you responded, lightly running your fingers through his hair and down his back. 

Watching the interaction ensue, Thranduil softly smiled down at the two loves of his life. The first one--his wife--who taught him the beauty behind exuding kindness, positivity, and light. The one who guided him back to the meaning of life. And the second one--his son--who embodies all the genuine goodness that his wife bestowed upon him in their early years together. He’ll never know how he got so lucky, but that unknown answer will never prevent him from being grateful. 

“Ada, gi melin,” your son quietly hummed as he lifted himself up to kiss Thran’s cheek. 

“Iôn nîn, gi melin as well. Very much.”

But then the unthinkable happened. Your little leaf turned his body away from Thranduil to look at Elrond. “Gi melin!” he shouted, a smile creeping up his face (with his lone tooth on display). 

“Well, I cannot say I am not shocked,” the lord responded, just as confounded as the rest of the group. Although Legolas was a very empathetic elfling, the reality was that he only shared that sentence with two people: his parents. So his sharing that sentiment with another-- a person he doesn’t spend every day with, let alone see once a month--was very odd, yet exciting in its own way. In your mind, maybe this was a sign that he was feeling more comfortable around his parents’ trusted friends. Maybe he saw the camaraderie in the room and felt soothed by it. Maybe he was no longer experiencing such debilitating episodes of timidity.   

“It appears he has taken a strong liking to you, Elrond,” you responded. “And now that you know the depth of his affections, are you truly going to permit an evil, dark presence permeating Mirkwood’s halls?”

He pondered that question in no time at all before saying, “No. I will not be the one to put this child at risk. Perhaps Frodo and his company can stay a few extra days at Rivendell. It really is not a problem.” 

At that declaration, you and Thranduil humbly nodded (hiding your smiles as best you could because this was a serious matter after all). “Thank you, my friend. Your concern for our son is much appreciated and will never be forgotten.”

“I know you would have done the same for me had I been in your shoes. Legolas deserves to be safe and comforted in his own kingdom without his parents having to worry about whether the ring will wreak havoc and harm him in the process. Besides, I want to return to Mirkwood in a few months’ time and still be on his list of love.” And everyone, including Legolas, giggled at that. 

#Thranduil #thrandolas #thranduil x wife #thranduil x oc #thranduil x reader #the hobbit #LOTR #sauron #babylegolas #legolas #love #theHOBBIT #battle of the five armies #Desolation of Smaug #the fellowship of the ring #quest #frodo baggins #gandalf #lord elrond #family #parenthood

[gossip-girl-of-middleearth]

Imagine helping Legolas deal with a sprained ankle

It was all your fault, so Legolas would say.

“If you hadn’t had been so reckless, I wouldn’t have had to jump down from the boulder to assist you with the orc,” he’d complain regularly, from his position forcibly laying down in his sleeping pack with an elevated foot.

Whenever he’d try to rise again to bicker louder with you, a tending Aragorn would push him down again with a hand to his chest.

It was funny the first few days, you couldn’t lie, but now? Well, now it was just sad.

Legolas prided himself on his athletic ability, that much was obvious to you and the rest of the Fellowship early into your journey.

He’d regularly prance ahead like a young foal, or walk across snow with a smug smirk on his face. He was the strongest member there, and never let anyone forget it. This is also why he took injury the worst out of everyone.

It wasn’t, in all actuality, technically your fault. You needed help with an orc, yes, but Legolas timing his jump wrong and spraining his ankle had nothing to do with you.

Alas, he was gaining cabin fever from his immobilised state, therefore anger was bubbling in his chest—directed at you. You didn’t take it personally, but it was starting to wear down on you.

The walks through the days were slower, as Legolas would limp along with a homemade walking stick, fashioned out of a long branch.

Whenever he’d notice you or someone else looking at him over his shoulder, as he bared his teeth in wincing hurt, he’d quickly glare and push on harder.

You’d softly shake your head, but look away regardless.

It was unnatural to see an elf in such a state, like roses freezing over. Even more so, it was unnatural to see Legolas so grumpy. He was quite light-hearted at the beginning of the journey—you remember making a mental note that he’d probably be one of the best to hang around with due to so.

Alas, his sprained ankle and no doubt self-inflicted embarrassment brought the deeply rooted competitiveness out within him.

You were all sat around a fire tonight (save for Boromir and Gimli, who were off scouting the area), like many other evenings—laughing and pulling rabbit meat off of a skewer.

Legolas was a few yards away, pouting in his sleeping bag. You had brought his food to him a few minutes earlier, but he turned you away and claimed he wasn’t hungry.

“You’ll need sustenance to heal, little elf,” you laughed, trying to humour him.

All you received was a gruff grunt, and, “Don’t tell me how elves heal—I’m quite aware of my own race, thank you very much.”

You heard Pippin hissing through a wince, and bared your own teeth in cringe as you turned on your heel and headed back towards the campfire.

“Pay him no mind,” Aragorn said, leaning across to you. “Elves, especially the Mirkwood strain, are very prideful folk. He’ll come to his senses once his foot heals.”

“I can’t imagine it’ll heal anytime soon if he keeps pushing himself every day like he’s doing,” you pointed out.

Aragorn sighed. “That is entirely Thranduil’s blood coming out in him.”

“Remind me to never step foot in Mirkwood then,” you grinned.

Aragorn gave a toothy smile back, and bonked his skewer with yours in a “cheers to that” motion.

You could feel Legolas’ eyes burning into the back of your head, but paid it no mind. You didn’t dare glance over your shoulder, lest Mordor freeze over.

The rest of the camp continued on in low chatter, that is until Boromir and Gimli came rushing back—completely out of breath.

“What is it?” Aragorn asked right away.

“Orc scouts,” Boromir answered, wiping the sweat from his brow. “Thirty, give or take, approaching from the west.”

The camp looked around at each other quickly in fright, before Aragorn jumped into action. Rising to his feet, he grabbed his sword and dictated everyone else to do the same.

“We’ll meet them half way and use the element of surprise,” he said.

Legolas began rising to his own feet, though, a great deal of strained effort was noticeable on his end.

“I’m coming, I just need to get my bow,” Legolas announced, barely able to move the foot resting on a sleeping pack.

“No, not you, mellon nîn,” said Aragorn, upholding a hand and motioning for Legolas to lay down again. “Please, stay behind. Though your valiance is admirable, you will only get in the way of this fight. Rest, and fight when your ankle heals.”

Legolas’ face contorted in hurt, and you imagined this was the first time the athletic prince had ever been sidelined.

You all stood around in misplaced guilt, fiddling with your swords and avoiding eye contact with Legolas.

Finally, the elf’s jaw set, and he forcibly fell back down into sheets—turning over and pulling the covers up over his shoulder.

“We can’t leave him vulnerable,” Sam pointed out, whispering quietly as to not anger Legolas further. However, you could see his pointed ears twitching back, and knew he heard every gut-punching word.

Aragorn nodded, and turned his eyes to you. The hobbits had to stay under the protection of Aragorn, and leaving Frodo and the Ring out of sight and alone behind in the camp simply wasn’t an option.

Aragorn gestured between you and Legolas discreetly. Understanding his words, you dropped your shoulders and sighed.

“I’ll stay back and tend to the camp,” you announced.

The rest of the Fellowship gave you an apologetic look, before running off into the forest towards the orcs.

You were soon left with the silence of the camp, save for the angered breathing of Legolas and the crackling of the dimming fire.

Stood there unsure of what to do in the awkward space, you continued fiddling with the pommel of your sword, and looked at Legolas.

His back was rising and falling quickly—clearly infuriated with the whole situation. You felt bad for him, you really did, but you were still unsure of how to approach him.

Looking down to the fire again, you saw untouched skewers of meat, and arrived at a resolution.

With the food in hand, you walked over to the prince. He could hear you coming, and with every crunch of your boots on the foliage, his eyes twitched.

Sitting down beside his back, you placed a hand on the broad of his shoulder and shook him gently. “The rabbit smells really good, and has that beautiful, slightly charred smoky taste. Seems a waste to not eat it, no?”

“Not hungry,” Legolas grumbled.

“You need to heal your ankle, Legolas,” you said again, this time sterner. “You need to ea—”

“Not. Hungry.”

Thinning your lips, you shook your head down at Legolas in disappointment. “Legolas, I know you’re upset with me regarding your ankle, but holding a grudge isn’t going to—”

He swiftly turned over in his pack, and stared at the dimming fire.

“We need more firewood,” he said, glaring at the dying flames.

You followed his line of sight, and noticed he was indeed right. However, you recalled the orcs and what Aragorn expected of you.

“We’ll just have to wait for the others. I can’t leave the camp to fetch more, and I definitely can’t leave you vulnerable to—”

“Ugh! I’ll do it myself!” Legolas exclaimed. He rose swiftly and tried limping out into the woods with clenched fists and squared shoulders.

“Legolas!” you called, quickly grabbing your sword and cursing under your breath. “Wait! You shouldn’t be on that ankle!”

But he was already marching on.

Heading a few strides out into the forest, Legolas went farther and farther to find the best firewood. You ran behind him, surprised he could go so far for someone who was injured.

“Wait!” you yelled again, finally jumping out in front of him. “Go back to sleep, Legolas. Now.”

He merely glared at you, and stepped around your form—pushing on.

Groaning in frustration, you turned around and pulled on his shoulder. “I’m serious, Legolas! There are orcs out here at the moment, and I need to stay by the camp!”

“Then you can go back,” Legolas growled, forcibly shoving your hand off of his shoulder. “I don’t need to be babysat by you.”

“No,” you agreed, “but you do need my help with your ankle!”

Grabbing the bottom of his cloak, you started pulling him back towards the camp.

“Let go!” he shouted, digging his one good heel into the ground and pulling his cape back—initiating a tug of war between you both.

“No!” you denied, pulling the cloak again. “You’re coming back with me, and that’s final!”

“NO!” Pull. “I’m helping by getting firewood!”

Yank. “You’re not helping at all! You’re putting me in a tough situation instead!”

“It’s not your problem!” Tug.

“Yes, it is!” you exclaimed, pulling the cloak one more time. “It is my problem, because you’ve become a HUGE problem for the entire Fellowship!”

Upon pulling one last time, Legolas lost his footing and tripped, causing you both to fall down.

You each groaned in pain as your backs were sprawled across the foliage. Legolas was the first to sit up, but immediately yelped in pain as he did so.

He held his ankle tight, and bared his teeth as to stop himself from crying out.

“It’s worse,” he whispered, avoiding your eyes. “My ankle—I think I hurt it more.”

You stared at Legolas in horror, as he clutched said sore ankle. You sat up next to him, and ran a finger along it.

He jolted immediately, and fought back another cry by biting down on his bottom lip.

“Dammit, Legolas…” you cursed, furrowing your brows and shaking your head. “Why couldn’t you have just listened to me? You need to rest.”

Upon glaring up at him, you were taken aback, for there were unshed tears in the elf’s eyes. He was clearly holding himself back from letting them fall, as he sniffled and studied his ankle.

“Legolas?” you called softly, reaching a hand up and gently directing his chin to face you. “What’s going on with you?”

Letting the first tear fall, and swallowing the lump in his throat, Legolas spoke up in a quiet voice—finally unbottling his emotions.

“I’m supposed to be the athlete,” he said, studying your eyes before looking down again. “I was always the best in training. I’ve pushed myself through rain, mud and more, because I’ve always been the best. And now? Now I can’t even fetch firewood for my friends...”

Sympathy overtook your eyes, as you suddenly understood the elf.

“You still are the best here, Legolas,” you promised, trying to catch his eyes as he averted them. “A sprained ankle means nothing in the grand scheme of it. You are, without a doubt, the strongest one of us here. None of us think differently of you simply because you’re hurt.”

“But I feel so useless!” he exclaimed, letting a few more tears fall. “My friends are out there right now pulling their own weight against the orcs, and I’m stuck here crying on the ground because I can’t even walk.”

“But you will walk again,” you assured him, turning his chin once more. “And when that day comes—which isn’t too far off, mind you—those orcs will wish they hadn’t ever left Mordor.”

You laughed brightly for a moment in afterthought, earning a smile from Legolas.

“What?” he asked gently.

“Do you remember how you took that cave troll down in Moria?” you chuckled again, thinking of the memory. “You scaled atop the darn thing and shot two arrows into its brain!”

“Three…” Legolas sheepishly corrected, now grinning in a shy way.

“Three,” you annulled, grinning back up at him. “Trust me, Legolas. Your friends think nothing less of you than pure amazing talent. Don’t let it eat away at you.”

Legolas nodded to himself for a moment, before another sheepish grin formed on his lips. “Speaking of eating…are there any of those rabbit meat skewers still left back at camp?”

You smiled warmly, and helped him up.

He tentatively accepted your aid, and slowly wrapped an arm over your shoulder, as you helped him limp back to camp.

“C’mon, athlete. Let’s get you some food.”

#Legolas x reader #legolas x y/n #legolas x reader imagine #legolas x you #lotr x reader #lotr x y/n #lotr x you #the lord of the rings x reader #lord of the rings x y/n #lord of the rings #lotrdaily #lotr movies #the hobbit #elves #hobbit #legolas #silmarillion #mirkwood #lotr shitpost #legolas greenleaf #lotr imagine #lord of the rings imagine #lotr Legolas imagine #Legolas imagine #Tolkien imagine #fellowship x reader #fellowship x y/n #fellowship x you #the fellowship of the ring

[jazzapples3]

So I saw a post by @bilbobagginsbrainrotblog with one of those iceberg things for lotr:

and I've decided I'm going to try and Explain the iceberg so here goes:

"Read the Hobbit as a kid": where it all began. Good children's book though.

"One does not simply walk into Mordor lol" classic Boromir meme from that infamous scene in Fellowship of the Ring, though the accompanying still is usually from the part where he is talking about the Great Eye.

"The Peter Jackson LOTR trilogy": how most people get into LOTR, and the most well known of adaptations.

LEVEL 2:

"Did you know that when Viggo kicked the helmet he broke his toe": the most quoted behind the scenes movie trilogy fact, commonly used tongue in cheek on r/lotr. During the scene in Two Towers where the three hunters find the piled pyre of Uruk corpses, Aragorn kicks a helmet and screams. He had actually broken his toe kicking the helmet and the scream was real.

"1977 the Hobbit animated": not actually Ralph Bakshi, it was a TV film by Rankin/Bass. Though more faithful an adaptation (the bar is quite low), it does come away with a higher dwarf death rate. I do remember it having an 'interesting' Gollum design.

"Knows how to say phrases in Elvish": look I know some stuff like 'mae govannen', 'hannon ie', 'ada', 'estel' etc, but languages in general are not my forte. If you hear enough elvish you are bound to pick something up.

"Read The Lord of the Rings books": if you read the Hobbit this is bound to happen at some point. Classic adult high fantasy, but no longer as easy reading as the Hobbit (though nowhere near the level of the Silmarillion).

"I think its in the Silmarillion": as mentioned above, Silm is not easy reading (it bears much resemblance to read epic poetry, which JRRT studied. As there are lots of references in LOTR to previous ages, it is fair to guess that they must be found in Silm somewhere, if not in the Appendices.

"Plays of has heard of LOTR online": an MMORPG by Daybreak Game Company, is generally viewed as good. I've never been into MMORPG's myself but have at least heard of it. As far as I know, its still running.

LEVEL 3:

"Has read the Silmarillion": ...am currently in the process, as it is by far one of JRRT's densest works, and his study of the epic cycles definitely shines through in the style. Recounts the making of the world, the War of the Silmarils in the First Age, and some of the Second Age. Is generally viewed as a hard read.

"How could they cut Tom Bombadil": Tom Bombadil was a character that appeared in the Fellowship of the Ring book, encountered by the hobbits in the Old Forest outside of Buckland. Of indeterminable age and origin, he contributed the fact that the Ring was effectiveless on a person with nothing to desire. Later, in the Council of Elrond, it was suggested to send the Ring to him, but that was quickly shot down. Most of his lines were given to Treebeard in the films, along with the part with Old Man Willow.

"Ralph Bakshi animated Lord of the Rings": a 1978 film quite endlessly screenshottable, and again shafts Glorfindel in favour of Legolas. Never actually finished telling the story, as it didn't cover the events of ROTK. I do believe that another film was made by a different company that covered the ending? Or am I creating false memories?

"Can translate all elvish used in the movies without subtitles": as previously mentioned I am horrible at languages but this is defintely possible as JRRT did not pull any punches in creating languages, and elvish (both forms) are able to be learned. Though, you can just do as I do, and just memorise the translation and look clever later.

"Holy shit Aragorn is 87": as a Dúnedain (Númenorian descent) Aragorn as a lifespan greater than that of other men (I think he ended up living to +200 years). At the start of the books, the timeline of events makes him 87, but he turns 88 on his birthday March 1st when he meets Gandalf the White in Fanghorn Forest (so the film is slightly off the mark here).

"Legolas only says three words to Frodo the whole trilogy": actually what he says in the films is 'and you have my bow' which is 5 words, but this is one of those 'Luke I am your father' situations where the quote is misremembered. Aside from that this is true.

"Stephen Colbert probably runs a Tolkien blog he could be any of us Oh God": the TV guy Stephen Colbert is very famously a Tolkien Nerd (tm) so this would not surprise me.

LEVEL 4:

"BBC audiodramatisations": a 26 part radio drama series produced by BBC 4. Fun fact: Ian Holm (plays Bilbo in the Peter Jackson films) is Frodo in this.

"Tom Bombadil was Tolkien's reader-insert": Tom Bombadil is a very mysterious character in Fellowship of the Ring, which much speculation as to who, or what he is, since Tolkien refused to elaborate. It's fun to see the very read scholarly arguments on Wikipedia, but it is stated that the character was inspired by one of JRRT's son's dolls. Perhaps this is what the iceberg is referring to? Please tell me if you know something more, I'm going insane.

"Vill you vear vigs? prank interview": Dominic Monaghan (who plays Merry Brandybuck) prank called Elijah Wood (Frodo Baggins) posing as a german 'interviewer' Hans Jensen, asking all sorts of off-the-wall questions, including the infamous 'vill you vear vigs?' This interview is freely available on Youtube.

"Is this Quenya or Sindarin?": Elvish as a language is split into two distinct forms: Quenya (the language of the High Elves, which is spoken by the Noldor and the elves in Valinor), and Sindarin (the language of the Wood Elves, spoken by the Sindar and presumably the Avari, those who lived in Middle Earth). They both use the Tengwar script of writing though. Sindarin is most commonly spoken, as in the First Age King Thingol of Doriath banned the speaking of Quenya.

"Has read Lost Tales and History of Middle Earth": The Book of Lost Tales and The History of Middle Earth is a collection of 12 volumes on legendarium lore spanning the history of Middle Earth and Arda. Like the Silmarillion, this was edited and published by Christopher Tolkien, though if you have read all 12 volumes of this, I have massive respect for you, since I've only managed to source two of the volumes for myself so far.

"Bro Elrond needs a break": damn Elrond has a backstory. Dad is absent, later becoming a star, his mum jumps off a balcony in the sack of Sirion and turns into a bird, not coming back, his murderous foster dads leave and don't come back, his wife is tormented by orcs and leaves to Valinor early without him, he leaves his kids behind in Middle Earth when he sails, one who he'll defintely never see again... damn.

"STRONG opinions on Feanor": on r/silmarillionmemes, there are two flairs for Feanor; 'Feanor did nothing wrong' and 'Feanor did everything wrong'. Dude was a pretentious prideful arsehole who kinda fucked up a lot, but he did have the balls to challenge Morgoth and call out the Valar, so opinions are up to you.

LEVEL 5:

"Can recite the Lay of Lúthien from heart": if you mean the Lay of Leithian, this is an unfinished poem published in the History of Middle Earth vol 3, detailing the story of Beren and Lúthien, also told in prose in the Silmarillion. If you want to try and memorise it, be my guest, though it is 4200+ verses.

"Can quote the entire trilogy from heart": a tall order but this can probably be done? Valar help the soul who tries it though.

"Favourite character is someone who is never seen of mentioned in the films": I'm sure the Silm fandom has your back. Maedhros deserved better.

"Sauron was once a hot guy": Sauron (or Mairon I guess) used to be super hot. After the fall of Númenor, where Sauron had basically orchestrated the entire fall, the Valar forbade him from ever taking a fair form again (or as I like to call it, revoked his sexy privaleges). Now he is not allowed to be super hot.

"Differentiates Finrod, Fingolfin, Fingon without issue": if he's blond, nice and friendly looking, and is maybe singing, its Finrod. If he's dark haired with braided in gold, maybe with a harp, or hanging out with Maedhros, its Fingon. If its neither, it Fingolfin.

"Has watched LOT but everytime Sam takes a step... 9hr long video": its an edit where everytime Sam takes a step he says 'its the farthest away from home I've ever been'. You can imagine why its so long.

"owns at least one replica sword or would if able": god I wish.

And there you have it! Am I making a video? Possibly not, but this explanation is here anyway. Hope you enjoy!

#lotr #the silmarillion #the hobbit #lord of the rings #if anyone spots any glaringly obvious mistakes please tell me its currently like 10 at night and considering i got up at like 5:30 i am so #out of it