#like I am aware that I'm talking in a some kind of privileged position here bc I don't know if I'd say the same if I was asian for example

[my-mt-heart]

Maybe I should clarify something that seems to be getting in the way of communication? Yes, this is a fan blog and people are expressing their personal opinions—everybody is entitled to theirs and I'm not trying to silence anyone, but to me and MT (please, correct me if I'm being presumptuous in speaking for you here) it also resides in a murky hinterland where we need to be aware of our professional personas/reputation. It's a public forum, so I'm focusing on certain talking points over others. That doesn't mean I'm blind.

(Also, sometimes, thoughts live in the spaces between words, not unlike coins and cookie crumbs underneath the cushions of a couch.)

"I understand the mission, what's helpful and what's not. But completely ignoring and dismissing his part in it all ain't it."

@satireplz, I'm neither dismissing, nor ignoring the man's flaws. (I'm well aware of them.) It's just not a productive conversation in this particular context. He's not running for public office, nor does he decide if the spinoff gets canceled, so it'll just fuel the current wave of 'misunderstood white men' who complain about being persecuted. We don't need someone going on a 2 am rage tweet spree about being bullied out of all his privilege and for media to pick that up and run with how unhinged fans are. Being the headline would be counterproductive when we want to draw attention to mistreatment of both employees and consumers.

AMC needs to change their practices. All executives need to be vigilant regarding their behavior and decisions: they affect real people and their livelihood. That's where we can have an impact right now.

@mmbangel:

"The facts are AMC loves Norman & they will do anything for him and he had always wanted his own spin off. The move to France has been very beneficial for Norman & trying to paint him as some victim is bullshit."

AMC is a business set up to make money, so their primary motivator is financial gain, not love. If the studio can make a profit out of Norman, it will. If he won't give them enough of a return, they'll invest elsewhere. He's a commodity. AMC has also had a massive overturn of personnel in the last year and working for the company doesn't make you part of a hive mind. Most of the key execs have moved on from their positions and Gimple doesn't love Norman or any of the other actors or the writers.

He isn't blameless, but there's no spinoff and probably won't be regardless of where Norman lives.

"If you love Melissa as much as you claim you wouldn't want her anywhere near Amc, Norman and Gimple. They treated her like trash and as if she wasn't important to TWD or the fans."

I don't want anyone anywhere near Gimple, but Melissa, as a competent adult, can choose for herself what she wants to do. It's difficult for female actors in their 50s to get work. It's a humiliating process if you're not a select few, coming mainly from film. That's also being treated like trash. Regardless, it's not for me to tell Melissa what to do and I think MT's collective just wants to give her the option to choose what she wants.

"People are upset because if NR and AMC treated the women tied to this spin-off as disposable….it does not speak well of them."

@cool-avaspuppies, I agree with you, but I think it's also important to remember that AMC isn't a monolith (even if they may seem like the Borg) and the people who oversaw the TWD franchise are no longer at the company. That gives a window to having some kind of impact on working conditions and the creative output that gets greenlit. Like you said, it's currently more important to target the people in power if we want good programming that is mindful of both its audience and the people working on the production.

If anyone minds being mentioned by name when I quote or address topics they've raised, please let me know and I will respect your wishes. I'm not here to hurt anyone's feelings. Just trying to work out where our common ground might be. :)

[SF]

I feel like I haven’t been successful yet in explaining why I’m always so diplomatic so thank you for bringing that up. It is a safeguard when you work in an industry where reputation and relationships are everything even if I’m confident nobody knows who I am. But also? It comes down to principles for me. We’re all human beings behind our handles and/or TV personas, so I think we all deserve to be treated that way. Getting publicly attacked, harassed, or threatened by people who don’t know you can be extremely damaging and I would never want to subject anyone to that when I know there are blind spots (not that I am fully blind either). That is a far cry from believing someone can do no wrong or hasn't done anything wrong.

I think we’ve been pretty successful finding common ground by showing our appreciation for Melissa, not to be confused with trying to force her into something she doesn’t want to do, and also loving Caryl, so that’s what I tend to focus on. 

#caryl #caryl fandom #caryl spinoff #carol peletier #melissa mcbride #darylneedscarol

[existentialteaparty]

WHAT THIS IS:

hi there! if you're here, you probably have existential anxiety. in this modern world of constant data and news, it can feel like we're trapped, unable to do any actual good. and maybe that's true, honestly! but in an attempt to encourage you to try, i created this blog to post easy, really EASY ways to be a better person. but not like gO tO BeD fOr 8 hOuRs, but hopefully little things that may inspire you to be creative

like saying "thank you" to the bus/train driver when you get off. if you don't do that, i highly suggest starting. not in the tone of like, 'wow you're so mean to them omg', but genuinely you feel more connected to your community. a stronger connection to community means a stronger connection to yourself, as you perceive yourself as kinder (because uh you are being kinder, even if in the most small way). in trying to get better mentally (or increase self-esteem), any small detail can matter. it paints the picture of ourselves in our minds. but this one is also so easy! and it applies in any situation really. just say "thank you" to people in general. or don't if you hate talking to people, and pick another one on this blog that suits your personality!

to become kinder, we have to also practice self-kindness. acknowledge your own personality, your own anxieties, your fears, your desires. maybe you have a lot of climate change anxiety: i will suggest easy, sustainable tips that will help ease that (not like 'omg go 100% trash free lolz' but 'it's okay to keep/not immediately replace clothes that have holes/stains!').

and for every one that i post, some of us will go "well duh! why would you ever not do x, y, or z?" but the point is that we vary on the spectrum, and these ones are ones which can be easily lost/not found as we fall into depressive or anxious holes. i will happily take suggestions!!!! if i only think of them they will all be around one "height".

ALSO. some (all probably in some capacitiy) will require privilege. but i think that's the point. this is meant for us privileged people , the ones who are aware of however much we have. how i am able to sit in my college apartment and worry about the state of the world from a comfortable position, but im not privileged enough to be Heard on a genuine level (i'm not a citizen so i feel this note immensely).

ALSOOOOO (if you read this far, wow ily kiss): if you DOOM SCROLL. if you already worry so much about the world and your existential depression/anxiety is obstructing your day, please proceed with caution! we have the possibility of being triggered into a rumination. this is only meant to be an aid, a way to approach ourselves kindly, a means to see Ourselves and the World in a more positive way. To Create hope. (we all go through bouts of existential sensitivity, so be aware of where you're at in the moment)

#introductory post #existentialism #philosophy #existential depression #existential anxiety #climate change

[saint-gerard-of-arc]

Weird question but it's been on my mind and I have no friends. How critical do you think you need to be of the media you consume espically when you're into things from like the 80s where alot of questionable things weren't called out as much?

I mean, very critical, I think? Like you have to be aware of the context of when and where those things happened.

That reminds me of two videos I saw, that oddly enough both involve Mötley Crüe and stereotypes of asian people: one was a commercial about this Asian guy playing as a mad scientist of some sorts with a very thick and cartoonish accent who invented a machine to predict if an album was gonna sell or whatever the fuck, where he'd make listen Shout At The Devil to some boomers and if they hated it, that'd mean it's gonna be a hit (I mean, solid point but could've gone without the very racist stereotype ykwim?), and the other is when Nikki and Vince hosted Headbanger's Ball back in... somewhere in the early 90s? I forgot the year specifically, but that doesn't really matter. Point is that Nikki was going on about how Vince is very fluent in Japanese and I immediately thought "no wait that's so cool--" but I forgot that we were in the 80s/90s and Vince was just yabbering making incoherent noises trying to imitate an asian language I guess and I was legit facepalming bc it was so cringey and stupid and wrong oh my god and I was like "pls just shut up"🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️

But at the same, that's what the 80s were all about, I guess? Like everything I've seen from that decade is extremely exaggerated and cartoonish (I might be a little biased bc all I've seen from that period are Crüe/hair metal mv lmao) so I just kind of accept it for what it is, bc even though a lot of the things that were done back then are questionable, there's not much we can do about it now, what matters more is that we moved on and improved as a society from that point. Like, when you consume media that are from a time period so different from the current one, I think it's important to both know when to turn off your brain so you can enjoy it without a care because in that precise moment you need a distraction but at the same time turn it on again when it's necessary to be aware that it wasn't perfect and some of the things said and done weren't good.

Like, you can enjoy a literature classic but also be aware that it might have some racist or sexist stereotypes: you have to both recognize it's a good story but also that it has its short comings due to the context and time it was written in. You have to be critical about the things you love, otherwise you'll never be able to face how reality is, which is made not of black and white, but rather shades of gray

#witchy's ask booth #mötley crüe #sorry I feel like I rambled a lot lmao but hopefully I got to the point!! #like just recently I was talking w andi about that shit they did with two girls and they stuck the phone... inside... of one of them??? #and I was like dude why do I love them again? they were so fucking disgusting #so just so you know that I'm not completely blind to their antics lmao I actually try to find as many nasty stories as possible about them #so I can be revolted and in disgust towards them #unfortunately 1) I still love them 2) they weren't the only ones doing nasty shit #80s band are the ultimate proof that cancel culture is useless and doesn't make any sense #like I am aware that I'm talking in a some kind of privileged position here bc I don't know if I'd say the same if I was asian for example #however the crue having lowkey highkey misogynistic lyrics never stopped me from enjoying the songs #even though all in the name of and its crippling p*dophilia kinda makes me uncomfortable lately when I hear the first line #but damn I remember when I was at the age nikki talks about in the song and I was like fuck yeah this is about me #so???? idk do I condone it? absolutely not #do I wish I was that teenager they talk about in that song? absolutely yes #was I aware back when I was 15 that this is very wrong? yeah kinda but I didn't really care. it was more enticing if anything #so I don't know dude we all have our contradictions #that's what humans are made of

[syntheticavenger]

Que Sera, Sera

I reached 10K.

10K! That's a big deal to me. Especially as someone who came over from AO3 and wanted to explore more interaction. And for a while, I enjoyed it. Loved it. Cranked out fics like no one's business because it was fun.

But I've stopped having fun.

Three users have had a parasocial interaction with me on here in the past months. If you don't know what that is, here you go. When I set my boundaries, I was threatened, told they would self-harm, delete, etc. if I didn't talk to them because I was 'their friend' and then a malicious rumor about me being a minor was spread - which was untrue. The worst part? People reblogging it without asking me if it was true. Thankfully, it was a non-issue after a while but I was blocked by a lot of people - and I had my age in my bio the entire time. That's how widespread the sheep mentality is here.

To top it off, I've continuously had my ideas stolen and been ignored when I fought back. Sometimes in casual discord chats and in conversations with people. Did I make it a huge deal? Nope. I messaged those who did it and some took it down and others... doubled down and kept them up. I prefer to keep it between myself and others. I was dragged in a vague post about stealing a sentence and many of my former mutuals took a side or stayed silent, choosing 'neutrality' and then ignoring me in the process. People have shown me again and again who they are in this space and I'm extremely grateful for the ones who I do keep close on here. I'm aware of an ask that has been circling around about work being stolen. I haven't posted it because I don't want the drama.

In the past when I've brought up my work being stolen, there is no listening. Only deflection that it was a 'mistake' or 'a coincidence'. A mind is already made up without even hearing me out? That's telling. If it was me and a familiar sounding sentence in two completely different fics? Raked across the coals, that post reblogged by the same people who stole from me prior. And I am tired of people rushing to defend these people. I wouldn't do, mutual or not. Wrong is wrong.

I am exhausted.

The toxic positivity of only uplifting your 'friends' and not others who are struggling to have their work be seen, reblogged, etc., was and still is performative and I'm not talking about me. The refusal to call out the blatant racism under the soft chiding of 'be kind' does nothing. I don’t even post some of the disgusting racist anons I get because there is no point in giving them any sort of attention.

Speak up about the blogs that are deleting because of racist anons and harassment, having their work stolen and the general bad treatment with people demanding updates and forcing their opinion on a story you’ve written, that comes from your own heart and brain. Let's go even further. Let’s talk about the harassment in general but staying silent because as long as it's not you, you’re good, right?

The continued abuse of black and POC writers on here is tiring. The consistent silence of the mistreatment is infuriating. The one person who inspired me to write was Jen and she got sick of the BS here and deactivated and went back to AO3. Do you know how frustrating that was for me? To know that even if her work was amazing, she'll only receive racist comments and harassment, barely any reblogs and no real engagement except for a few measly reblogs of her black authors masterlist.

Performative.

I enjoy writing for my mutuals and my anons, hands down. That's why I'm still here. I'm going to let that be enough.

I wanted to do a challenge but at the moment, I'm mentally exhausted with the blatant gatekeeping (which in itself is hilariously pathetic), silence with harassment when it isn't your friend groups, the continuous harassment of black writers (especially in the CE fandom - which is hilarious in its own, considering my own experience) and the increasing fragility of some writers on here when they are called out on their own privilege.

I'm not here to police your ways of interacting. But I am here to make sure my space is curated for myself.

And right now? Some of you don't fit in this circle.

So.

Snip, snip.

To my amazing mutuals and anons, I'm here. Just trying to balance out my personal life outside of here that has gotten much better now that I am not entertaining as much toxicity from this place. I see your asks and I'll be responding as my mental health allows. I see every single note and it makes my heart so happy.

I am protecting my little slice of peace at the moment. It's a nice place to be and I'll have a challenge up when I don't feel like burning this blog to the ground every time I log in.

Let this also be known that I'm posting this to get this off my chest and to not let this weigh me down.

Do not take this as a sign of weakness that I'm keeping it professional.

[incorrect-ikevamp-quotes]

hi I'm back again. Anyways; as always you don't have to answer if you don't wish! How do you think the residents would react to a young Pureblood MC? (I'm talking about young like a minor.) With that Gen Z in a nutshell personality. Obviously no romantic feelings, just in your opinion how do you think they'd react? all of my questions are just "coincidentally" oddly specific aren't they, totally

Oh shit whaddup I love the idea of Gen Z MC!!! Young pureblood it is, here we go! I’m going to be moving from the assumption that they’re like Comte/Leo; very sympathetic to humanity and sometimes have existential crises (trauma babeyyyyyyyyy). As such, I’ll also be assuming she’s not super close to her family given she rejects the larger vampiric hierarchy/superiority paradigm, memes and modernity, all that jazz

I hope this fits the bill! c:

Under a cut bc is a lonnnnnnng boi~ Click after Napo to see everyone else’s! No explicit triggers that I’m aware of, but if anybody sees anything I missed feel free to let me know

Comte’s reaction:

Absolute baby, he has decided this is his grandchild--no he will not change his mind or take constructive criticism. Get’s ESPECIALLY concerned when he starts to see signs of that “nothing in life matters 😎” nihilism, but doesn’t pester them about it or becomes naggy. Growing up he had similar issues with the prospect of eternal life surrounded by creatures with a mortal lifespan, so he doesn’t judge. He’s more like nah we all hit that vibe, let’s see if we can get their mind off it c: I feel like Gen Z really understand and appreciate the importance of culture and art, so I feel like they would bond a ton over trips to museums/plays/concerts! Invites them to tea time if he ever sees them particularly silent (ah yes, repression) or particularly tired, and does his best to ensure their safety without being intrusive (has briefed the men to escort/accompany her as needed, though Sebas usually does it).

If he sees fangs out around baby he will thrash the shit out of the perpetrator--unless it’s an accident. No excuses. That’s a child. Doesn’t give a FUCK if they’re another pureblood even with all the arranged marriage bullshit. He said what he said. (Remember that biting between vampires or vampire + human relations is considered something that’s only done between intimate partners, so he is having none of that for a minor)

Leonardo’s reaction:

Also certified granddad, but he’s the one that enables shenanigans and is just like “oh worm” when it comes to the existential dread (it’s a Tuesday). At first though Leo is basically that meme like: (Stupidman = Leo, Maddie = MC)

Not all purebloods are necessarily dangerous, but most are either incredibly indifferent to the plight of others (especially humans) or actively range from like playing social mind games to being sociopathic murderers/etc. the list goes on. As such, Leonardo is suspicious to no end until he sees that the kid really doesn’t have any ill will in her. She jokes with Sebas (they quote vines on the daily) and works with him normally; even when Leo asks Sebas he’s just “????? bro she’s just my kouhai, thanks for worrying tho”. One day he’s tasked with escorting her to grab groceries and assorted things for the mansion, and she freezes in place before bolting across the street. Turns out she saw a kid trip in the road and fall, and a carriage was moving fast from the other side--it likely wasn’t going to be able to stop. She scoops up the kid and holds them close, and when the parents try to thank her profusely she just seems more uncomfortable with the praise than triumphant. She didn’t want the kid to get hurt. If she could do something about it, it was as simple as that.

From that point on they’re hella chill and hang out together, usually just bonding in silence. If they’re an artist, he’ll offer them pointers and technique manuals--will help however he can. If not, they’ll just be reading together in the library now and again. If she falls asleep, he’ll tuck her in and watch over her (cue red eye meme when the door opens, but then it’s just Vincent so he c:). He’ll often pay close attention to her eating habits to make sure nothing’s amiss with her health since she’s still a growing pureblood. If she struggles with what she is a lot (given she’s sympathetic to human beings) he’ll synchronize his Rouge drinking with hers to make sure she doesn’t starve herself ;-;. Even if she’s just forgetful about drinking/eating, he’ll do what he can to make her life easier (that’s how he shows his affection uwu)

He will, of course, also tease her about being a baby until she kicks him in the shin while Comte sighs and tells him to knock it off with a smack upside the head

Napoleon’s reaction:

Not granddad energy, but you better believe he’s in a weird territory between sheer admiration and “I am your older brother now, eat your vegetables” “But I don’t even need vegetables” “Eat your vegetables and I’ll take you to a crepe shop” “............deal” 

Basically it’s unlikely MC is super close to her siblings or even has any (pureblood children are a rare feat) so she’s like......wary, but then she just ???? this is.....kinda nice? Just having somebody that cares in a chill way, but still fully encourages her to throw men across the street if they’re hurting women/children (high fives her every time). He’ll often invite her to the swordplay lessons with the kids alongside Isaac’s teaching; she’s free to join in the learning, or honestly just hang out with people closer to her age (he’s v concerned about her having friends that she can relate to and talk to freely). 

Protective in a subtle way, like Leonardo. Escorts her places and helps her carry groceries without fail when Sebas is running other errands. She becomes his crepe shop cover buddy whenever he has an intense hankering for sweets: “wanna go to that crepe shop around the corner” “you’re just too chicken to go alone, fool” “do you want crepes or not nunuche” “............BOKBOKBOK” “aight that’s it **gives her a noogie**” (they go anyway and have a marvelous time rating the crepes from best to worst, they got a whole list goin’) 

Glares Arthur down if he so much as LOOKS in her direction

Mozart’s reaction:

Mozart is just the “what is with this sassy, lost child?” meme. Doesn’t dislike them, but they are just not remotely threatened by his haughty disdain by any extension. And he HATES IT. The MC is always just “Okay, boomer” and he just ?????? He doesn’t know what it means but it’s openly dismissive, so he mad.

Like idk if y’all know this meme, but it’s the same energy as:

It’s only when he notices she’s always punctual and careful with his requests that he starts to warm up. For example, she makes him a mocha by combining the way he likes his coffee and hot cocoa to perfection when he falls asleep at his piano. (She feels bad for him after Comte explains because--though he’s got a stick up his butt--he’s clearly distressed in his new surroundings ;-; Plus, the kind of perfectionism Mozart exudes is an extension of internalized shame, and when she begins to see that she really shifts her approach.) As such, he begins to soften to her presence. He begins to see that she isn’t indifferent to his existence, it’s more that she sees no need for intimidation and believes admiration is earned (basic respect isn’t a privilege, it’s a right). When he figures that out, he stops being so barbed and terse--starts to relax. Offers to let her stay and listen to his pieces if she wants, and she’s honestly touched given his clear struggle with vulnerability. Cuddles with Schelm at the window as he plays, and they become good friends. 

As a result, Mozart becomes fiercely protective despite her sturdier nature as a pureblood and has hissed venom at Arthur about the fact that she is off fucking limits. Doesn’t leave her alone in the same room as the other men unless it’s with Jeanne or Comte; he don’t trust like that.

Arthur’s reaction:

Sweating a lot at the sudden collection of baleful eyes sticking to his back everywhere he goes, but figures he brought it on himself to an extent. That being said, he can’t really get a word in edgewise given she just walks away when he tries to engage in conversation or compliment her.

Tough nut to crack this one, but he doesn’t let it discourage him. The only way she’ll give him the time of day is to play chess--and she kicks his ass soundly every single time. He’s fascinated by her extensive analytic ability, but she keeps silent about her strategies and thinking. Dazai and Theo always love to watch him get his ass handed to him, but he considers it a really interesting experience; it gives him insight into her mind, no matter how much she tries to hide. Patient, efficient, brutal--this kid has seen some shit, probably.

It’s after that point he just concedes she probably won’t let him in, though it doesn’t diminish his curiosity about the future; and perhaps traces of dread. What does the future look like for both her and Sebastian to be that stoic and aloof? It worries him...

Vincent’s reaction:

Vincent is v v impressed by her sense of self, and honestly sees a lot of Theo in her. She’s a little more reticent than Theo, but she has this same commitment to protecting the vulnerable and penetrating through the lies/shitty convictions of others. She is not a person who bends easily, but even so there’s a quiet kind of gentleness to her: she always chats to him v calmly, asks if he needs anything and is doing okay, doesn’t get impatient when he drops things or forgets his apron for the laundry. I think he would respond very positively to her presence, even if it wasn’t intentional. He just brightens up like a little sun and asks her out to picnics for fun; he has no greater intention than enjoying her smile and silly antics (he doesn’t always understand the references, but the way she executes it with so much dry wit--like Theo--makes him laugh). He just feels the warmth of family/familiarity around her ;~;

Ironically, they’re both exceedingly concerned for the other because they’re too self-sacrificing jkashlgdks like this is 100% a case of “I can’t let a young lady risk getting hurt” “Vincent I’m literally indestructible please just let me do this” “But it still hurts” “But I don’t want you to scar--” (This conversation extends so long that the author felt it would be more beneficial to add an etc. here). 

He admires her and trusts in her abilities more due to the nature of her maturity, treats her like a cherished friend and sometimes younger sibling (not condescending but very indulgent; gives her the last of his sweets for example, or pats her on the head when she’s feeling gloomy--more of a wholesome puts her first). But make no mistake, he will throw hands in milliseconds if she gets ganged up on or can’t handle a threat--he just lets her handle most things bc she’s capable~

Isaac’s reaction:

Torn. Because on the one hand, she’s very serious and conscientious about her work--doesn’t want to inconvenience or trouble anyone--and he relates to that heavy.

HOWEVER.

She’s also got insanely chaotic energy when the mood strikes, so when Dazai starts doing his random shitfuckery you better believe MC is upping the ante. (I’m talking AH. ENSLAVED MOISTURE. levels). So Isaac essentially oscillates between thankful for her fortitude to bashing his head against a table for every second he knows her.

In all seriousness though, I would see Isaac as being pretty concerned. Like Vincent, they’re both self-sacrificing to a fault--and he doesn’t want that for her, especially given how young she is. Often tells her not to overdo it or to ask for help if she looks overwhelmed, though it’s not condemning; he says it softly with a neutral look on his face. (He considers it a Certified Mood^TM). He just wants to give back all the care she puts into helping around the house. He doesn’t feel right watching a kid work so hard without reminding her that she should find time to have fun and live for herself too. There will be plenty of time when she’s older to get serious.

He has a fairly easy time interacting with her because of his experience with kids; he takes her seriously (when she’s not clowning) and treats her autonomy with respect. If anything, she’s probably the protective one. She knows he’s an aberrant so she pays laser attention to when he’s suffering and brings him Rouge (not scared because she’s stronger than him and not human lmao, and she sees no need to put Sebastian at risk). When that uni pres pesters him, she goes cold and angry and asks the man to step off when she sees him start to downspiral. They’re essentially on equal footing (he has more life experience, she has more bodily strength/confidence). They're just chill and kind with each other (babies of the mansion, beloved by all).

Theodorus' reaction:

Because he is a manchild, he will be chill/generally indifferent until Vincent starts being indulgent with her (bro-con). He won't be violent or anything like that, but he will pout a storm and try to verbally shoo her away. Because she's a woman, intelligent, and likely a feminist--this will become hilarious because she will not remotely take him seriously. She will just ignore him or roast him in seconds before moving on with her day. Otherwise he doesn't care much because he doesn't have time to play babysitter (unless there's no one else to help).

At the most, he'll make sure she's safe and use the excuse that Vincent would be upset if he did anything less. If she likes/loves dogs and plays with King while she's there, he'll soften up and thank her for taking care of him. If she makes hella pancakes, he'll be the proudest about it--ruffling her hair. If she protects Vincent in any capacity, he'll be torn between jealous, grateful and impressed; he likes a kid that can hold their own and take responsibility within their abilities.

So their relationship is v much like a chill uncle with their niece; fond, but not necessarily super close or spend a ton of time together. He has his priorities, but he won't be an asshat (mostly).

Jeanne's reaction:

Jeanne is confused on so many levels. He doesn't dislike her spunk he's just staggered by her level of sheer reckless, righteous rage. (And he's a bit wary in the face of another pureblood as a potential enemy) but after a bit more time around her he relaxes. She's fairly simple to understand when you get to know her; cares about others to a fault, existential dread, overworks herself. Stays watchful, but he just treats her like the younger kids that Napoleon brings by the weapons shop when they need armor for practice. It can get a little funny because he’ll just be like “uhhhh uh kids like sweet stuff right? Here have some of the macaroons somebody brought by earlier, I don’t like ‘em that much anyway.” And she just “??? Thanks???” He doesn’t mind being around her, just doesn’t really know what to say so they often fall into comfortable silence after exchanging small talk. She likes that he isn’t complicated; what you see is what you get with Jeanne. It’s nice not to have to keep her guard up every second of the day,

When he sees her feeling particularly down, he’ll take her to that little field of white lilies behind the mansion during a full moon night. The silver light seems to make the petals emit an ethereal glow, and she makes him a flower crown in thanks. He listens kindly if she wants to talk, and if she doesn’t--that’s okay too; he’ll just give her a head pat.

Honestly he finds a lot of relief in the fact that she's a pureblood, because he feels less nervous about her being fragile or her getting fatally hurt when he’s not around. Will still be very gentle with her and protect her when she’s in proximity

Mission Status: Fucking Wholesome

Dazai’s reaction:

Big brother time? It’s big brother time!!!! He instantly makes it his subtle mission to look after her, though he’s v lowkey abt it. She takes one look at this depressed mofo climbing in through the window and just goes “aw yeah, this guy FUCKS” and they become besties at a glance. They basically make a game out of who can be the most absurd whenever they’re in the same room. Comte and Leo find it utterly hilarious, Napoleon is digging a grave for Isaac in the backyard (we all know his heart won’t be able to take it. Mozart is probably next. A moment of silence for our fallen.)

I just imagine them like that one post (@/acoolguy):

Dazai: You ever have to shake your leg because there’s a rock in it? MC: That’s your bones Dazai: Every day I learn some more

He’ll always share treats with her and brings her along for walks if she’s feeling wanderlust; he knows how hard it can be, how restless the heart becomes so far from home. He does his best to distract her with their ongoing jokes, but one day it starts raining very suddenly while they’re out. He rushes her under the nearest tree with broad, broad leaves and settles his haori/overcoat over her head. He looks incredibly serious as he looks to the sky--almost glowering at the dark clouds gathering, He doesn’t look at all like his usual fun-loving self in that split second, even though he’s back to his good-natured chirping “Guess we’ll just have to wait out the downpour. MC, are you cold? I should have been more careful.” She shakes her head and shares the coat with him, holding it out insistently until he relents. Their hands brush and she notices they’re freezing, but she doesn’t say anything. She seems to sense he has a lot on his mind, and leans her shoulder against his. The silence feels fragile; she doesn’t want to risk shattering it--shattering him. It is often said that it is an act of great courage to wipe away someone’s tears. But it can also be an act of great gentleness to turn away, to pretend one cannot see them fall (whether visible or not).

One day, after MC returns to her own time, Dazai returns to his room to find two shadows hanging from his window. Though a little crude--they’ve obviously been made by a beginner--it’s clear what they are. Rain ghosts. (Sebastian later explains it was MC’s wish that he have them, and Dazai only smiles very, very gently in response.)

Shakespeare’s reaction:

MC gets one look at him and knows something’s off. She can’t quite tell what it is, but he doesn’t feel like the rest of the family. She can sense something behind him, something lurking; but she can’t quite place it. (Comte has mentioned before that purebloods can sense each other, so I imagine MC knows right off the bat he isn’t a normal sired vampire--she just doesn’t know enough to identify exactly what it is.)

That being said, she is sus. He keeps talking like some kind of weird ass court jester/fae, and she hated his work when she had to do it for school (only enjoyed the Hamlet memes because, let’s be real, that shit is uproarious). When he tries to coax her to see Vlad with him, she says “'Sblood, do you think I am easier to be played on than a pipe? Call me what instrument you will, though you can fret me, yet you cannot play upon me.” And he just freezes in place before he starts laughing. Considers their battle of wills well-played, and warns her not to go out alone--doesn’t bother her again. Though sometimes enjoys listening to her conversations with others for good roast material. (No he is not taking notes, no this new chara is just fire and feral for no good reason--nothing to do with MC)

Sebastian’s reaction:

The l o r e, MC. Give him the forbidden pureblood lore. Will be incredibly curious and ask about what vampires are like outside of the mansion, for science of course. If he senses discomfort though his questions will die down completely--it’s not his intention to make her uncomfortable. He’s just curious! 

Despite his stoicism he’s actually a very, very understanding and warm person.  Will listen to any teenage jadedness or hopelessness with fond patience, recalling the days he was similar. He’ll offer what advice he can. He’s not one to be preachy, but if he sees someone at a loss, he’ll offer what he thinks might be a productive direction for them. Given her removal from her home and parents--even though she’s already well into high school--he’ll sympathize deeply with her position. Will be a firm but gentle guardian (hello Mansion Mom #2), offers her candy every time she does a chore exceptionally well or offers assistance without prompting. She’s sus and takes it reluctantly at first, but after she tries one in private secretly loves them. Sebas is just silently “you like krabby patties don’t you, squidward”. If she’s honest, she’s comforted by the sense of normalcy and care he gives, the harmless joking and easy respect for others (unless otherwise provoked).

When she finds out about his hobby considers him to be a Fucking Nerd^TM and wants to shove him into a locker, but in reality is endeared by how much he genuinely cares about the men. She thinks it’s a harmless fascination, and she senses the oddest...ephemerality about him. Because of this, she becomes pretty protective; he’s a human and he’s too nice for his own good. While she identifies in one sense, she worries in another. Pureblood are sturdy, but humans can’t necessarily sustain that kind of constant self-giving for long...

Also bc my tag game too strong adding it here: #i love the prospect of pureblood MC trying to bring Sebas and Napo together #MC: bruh i got this #Sebas, full of gay panic: wait, MC nO--

Meme tl;dr in the tags also for your enjoyment! I’m sorry this one took a little longer than most to finish!

#asks #ikevamp #ikemen vampire #ikevamp headcanons #ikevamp napoleon #ikevamp mozart #ikevamp leonardo #ikevamp leo #ikevamp arthur #ikevamp vincent #ikevamp isaac #ikevamp theo #ikevamp jeanne #ikevamp jean #ikevamp dazai #ikevamp comte #ikevamp saint germain #ikevamp shakespeare #ikevamp sebastian #gen z pureblood mc #i had a lot of fun writing this! I hope this met your expectations friend! c: #comte and leo: uwu grandparents #mozart: okay BOOMER #napo: HAHAHA shithead siblings i love it #arthur and shakes: wouldn't you like to know weather boy. 'where are your parents??' (parts one and two) #vincent and isaac: BRUH S A M E S I E S #theo: **meme voice** 'is there anything worse than a rapist?' BOOM 'a child.' 'N O!' #jeanne: endearing but out of touch uncle while dazai is WOOOOO LET'S DRINK BLEACH uncle #sebastian: ah yes ty for the modicum of brain cells and competence that also shatters gender norms my good bi bitch #**Gilligan's cut to MC and Dazai wearing sunglasses and matching hats that read 'i put the (me) in disappointment'**

[outrunningthedark]

Hey T, hope you're doing alright. I've been following your blog for a while and love the posts you share and getting your view on things.

So talking about ableism and disabilities. I'm neurodivergent, like all treated like "special but slighlty disturbed child" before and IDK if it was just a quirk of mine, or ableism in the end but... Like I always used to read a lot and I read about disabilities and disorders, and every time I was super impressed and intrigued. Like I remember when I was 7 I read about a blind little girl who knew how to tie her shoes even though she never saw them, and I was so impressed, I challenged myself to learn how to tie my shoes blind. I closed my eyes and practiced until I learned. I tried to learn Braille, and I've learned some ASL before, bc every time I read something I was like "that's so cool" and I wanted to be as capable as those people. Like I said, it could've been just a quirk, bc I practiced how to read upside down and sideways without moving my head at all, I practiced writing with my left hand. I often tried doing things with one hand bc I was like "what if I didn't have a second?". I wondered all the time how I would cope if I were physically disabled, and I wanted to practice and learn how to do all the things disabled people could. Like I know I had thoughts about "what if I had to use a wheel chair or crutches" and I was upset about my arms being "weak" and idk if it was actually a conscious thought but I ended up having more strength in my arms than legs. But I generally liked to learn a lot. Like, I was reading national geographic with 7, and I learned all cats and dogs breeds, and I knew details and quirks about different kinds of wild animals. I had my mother buying me history books about ancient times. And generally, I have always overhtought everything. I was the silent (selectively mute) kid who thought about things for an hour before saying anything, I had a whole phase where I refused to walk on grass bc I didn't want to kill any bugs I couldn't see by accidentally stepping on them, y'know. I never wanted to kill the mosquitos even if I had 100 bites at a time bc I thought about the mosquitos life. Y'know?

And I know this is kinda obnoxious, bc here I am, able bodied and going all "I, I, I," with my privilege of not needing to use those capabilities, but still being able to perform them, and having the option to learn and choosing it. And this is really just a very selfish ask and question and I'm sorry, I just kinda wanna soothe my own conscience I suppose, which is... Pretty terrible. It's just something that I was always worried about. Even back with 7 years I hid what I was doing, only did it when no one was looking, bc I was afraid it would be disrespectful or come across as if I was ungrateful for my abilities.

But do you think it comes from a place of ableism?

Bc if so, I would like to unlearn, I'd like to be able to engage with disabilities in a positive way.

Thank you, hope you have a nice day!

You want to know something? More and more lately I find myself ashamed that I, a person with both a sense of a sight and hearing, have never attempted to learn sign language beyond what they taught me in preschool/kindergarten...and Braille? I...don't think I've ever actually seen it up close? (At least, I can't recall.) Having a disability, no matter whether it's physical, developmental, intellectual, invisible, etc. SHOULD make us more aware of the struggles others in our community face, especially when those struggles highlight our own privileges. I will say I don't know if everyone with a physical disability would agree that the things we do to survive are "cool" because not all of us view our limitations or alternative methods as something to celebrate. Some people hate the body they were born into, and that's okay. Some people hate having to do things differently, and that's okay, too. I don't believe you mean any harm in your views, but "that's so cool!" is inspiration porn type of phrasing, so try to be aware of when you're thinking that way and instead of saying it's "cool", realize *why* they're functioning that way, *why* you don't HAVE to. I also don't believe your thirst for knowledge comes from a bad place, and it's good that you understand there's a chance you might one day end up physically disabled. Our community is pretty split on whether "this could be you one day" is necessary when trying to educate about ableism. On the one hand, yes, able-bodied people need to realize that physical disabilities can happen at anytime to anyone regardless of age, health, gender, sexuality, race, religion. The disabilities themselves do not discriminate. It's the people around us who decide whether our lives have value based on additional factors. On the other hand, warning the able-bodied that they could "end up like this" makes it sound like the worst case scenario, like having a physical disability is something to fear. I definitely would not ever try to test out a wheelchair or walker or crutches, etc. if you don't have to because at that point you're treating our mobility aids like a prop, and we haaaate that. (I know you didn't suggest you would. That's just a general PSA for anyone reading this.) Let me point out, however, that "worrying" about not being strong enough to use a mobility aid correctly is not worth your time. If it happens, it happens and you'll learn what to do. I've been using mobility aids from the age of two, and I didn't come out of the womb with upper body strength or a brain that *knew* how to use them. It took lots of practice. It took lots of energy. It took lots of tears, if you want the truth. But when I didn't succeed, I tried again. And again. And again. I kept trying until it was ingrained in me because this was (and is) my key to survival. You're not there yet. You may not ever *need* to get there. It's okay. But do continue to acknowledge other forms of disability and recognize the advantages you have just by being (physically) able-bodied, much like I do as someone whose biggest struggle is not being able to walk on my own. There's plenty of disabilities I do not have to deal with and I don't take it for granted. TL;DR Don't beat yourself up. The fact that you're willing to ask questions shows you've got more courage than most able-bodied folks who avoid the topic altogether.

#anonymous #tina speaks

[inessencedevided]

The Untamed, episode 48 - watching notes

I've got more tissues prepared because Yunmeng bro feelings always hit me HARD and that's where I left off last time

I find it kinda sweet that lwj is defending Wen Ning

It makes so much sense for Jiang Cheng to immediately bring up his old resentment cor the way his father treated then up. It really all goes back to that. The feeling of being always second best, both to his father in comparison to wwx and to wwx in comparison to lwj. And while wwx sacrificed his core because he thought of himself as inferior to Jiang cheng (not in skill but in worth), to Jiang Cheng it comes off as him once more playing the hero :/

All in all THESE IDIOTS NEVER LEARNED TO PROPERLY COMMUNICATE

Also the way Jiang cheng says "then what am I?" Reminds me a lot of the way he grieved for his core

You know what fucked me up most during this whole conversation?

Because that's it. He can't! 😭

He still loves wei Wuxian and he can't understand why wwx never chose him. Why he chose to protect lwj and the wens when he knew it would endanger their clan. And from that perspective, I get it. I feel like to Jiang Cheng, his clan is everything. It's only natural. He is the (future) clan leader and he was raised that way. It was always going to be his responsibility and at the same time, he always had this very clear cut role in their society.

But wei Wuxian? He loved their family and he did feel at home at their clan, but he was still very much an outsider. Madam Yu hated him, people kept calling him a servant when it suited them and told him to mind his place as such when he spoke up. He could emphasize with the outcasts of society because he himself never truly left that outsider status behind either!

Which left him and Jiang Cheng in opposing positions with no way of understanding the other's point of view

... while still loving each other

😭

Because all they were in the beginning, was two boys being brothers 😥

Which leads me to the conclusion that, once more, the true enemy of this story isn't any single person, it's society.

Okay, sorry that this essentially turned into meta. That's probably not what you're here for, but as thus show comes to an end, I have FEELINGS and THOUGHTS and I need to get them out 😅

I have another rant in my head on whether or not I think wwx was right in transferring Jiang Cheng his ckre without telling him, but I'm holding that in for now 🙈

That I'm sorry. From BOTH of them. 😭

THAT'S GROWTH!!! 😭😭😭

Wei Wuxian saying that it's all in the past now made me cry. So. Much. Because it's an ending. It sounded to me like he wanted to wipe the slate clean. No promises. No betrayals. Start anew. And ... I'm not okay 💔😥

Hey Nie Huaisang. Welcome to the party :D

Um ... what's happening?

Are they ... burning?

Jin Guangyao played with fire and got burned or what kind of metaphor is this?

I'd be about as good as nie Huaisang at hiding my reaction in that situation, tbh ^^

This is the weirdest hostage situation I have ever seen, with everybody just running around sind no one even guarding the hostages

The hell is in that tomb? 😳

Wait ... nie Mingjue was the headless corpse? And okay, the head is obviously seen back on here but ... how did it get there so quickly and WHY is Jin Guangyao surprised?? Wasn't he in possession of the head??

I.am.confused

Poor Huaisang :'(

And poor Jin Ling. He's learning quickly just how fucked up his family is 😬

*dramatic thunder in the distance*

👆 favourite trope of mine :D

It's an oldie but a goodie

Wwx understands something I don't ^^

Also nice to know that even when they're both without powers lwj will still protect his husband 🥰

Okay, so ... someone put the body there. The same somebody who orchestrated everything else

WHO??

Omg, I love how wwx plays at Jin Guangyao's paranoia by essentially manipulating him as he did others and then turns to lwj, with a little shrug and a half smile like

CAN I PLEASE GET 50 EPISODES OF THESE TWO SOLVING MONSTER OF THE WEEK MYSTERIES TOGETHER? 😭

So they FINALLY thought it was a good idea to actually restrain their hostages. Genius!

Wait ... Su She has that hole curse, too?

OHHHH

He was the one who cursed Jin Zixun???

I hadn't even thought about the fact that that was still an unanswered question! 😱😱😱

Jgy telling wwx that they were always going to end up on opposite sides is SO interesting and betrays a level of self-awareness I would not have afforded this guy

The thing is, su she raging at lwj for this is really the wrong address. Not because what he says isn't at least partially right (lwj was born into privilege and there is a stark disparity in how clan disciples and peripheral disciples are treated), even in the lan clan, but not BY lan Wangji. He's the guy who knelt before his uncle and let himself, the sect leader's son, be punished alongside the servant's son.

It's fascinating to see Jin Guangyao's mask fall

And his view of wwx is even more fascinating

He deliberately used wwx status as an outsider to society in combination with his impulsive and righteous character to further his own agenda of setting his own status as an outsider

It's like the ULTIMATE Slytherin vs. Gryffindor story line 😁

Also SOCIETY IS THE VILLAIN!!!

I'm not gonna lie, Jin Guangyao nakes some good points. Not saying he's not a terrible person or that he's not responsible for his own actions, but still he's successfully identified a lot of systematic problems in the cultivation world 🤷‍♀️

... and then proceeded to horribly exploit them for his own benefit *sighs*

Very sneaky, Wei Ying. I don't know what you're doing it, but good job getting him to keep talking

Xichen really be regretting all his life choices right now

It breaks my heartba bot, knowing that they really did bond that first time they met. And Xichen believed in him ever since 🥺

As sorry as I feel for him, I'm pretty sure it's going to get worse 🙈

OH MY GOD WWX CAN CONTROL GHOSTS BY WHISTLING ALONE NOW?

That is simultaneously SO cool and SO creepy! 😱

And kinda hot

On a related note, I realized that wwx is basically a Necromancer Bard and now I really wanna play one

Ohhh, the sword ghost!

😳

Isn't Xichen without powers right now?

No!!!

Puh, su she didn't kill him

But now I'm confused how lwj can use his powers

Ohhh

He's got the stygian tiger amulet?

I'm missing some crucial bit of plot here because I fo not know how he could have gotten it

I mean ... Xue Yang had half of it right? So ... is it this piece?

HE PLANNED THE WHOLE THING ALREADY BACK THEN??? 😱

Or ... not the whole thing? I feel I'll have to watch the show again just to discover what Jin Guangyao even knew and when 🙈

The way jgy looks at Xichen, there us real affection and regret in his gaze :(

Still I did not see THIS coming

He does care for Xichen, doesn't he? Who always saw the best in him. Never once treated him as below him for who his mother was.

But I dont think lan Xichen will give him a second chance right now, tbh. Just from the way he acted, he looked like his trust was irreparably shattered 😥

Meanwhile...

Wwx is tired of your monologueing :D

I apologise for the weird mix of stream-of-cosciousness musings and half-formed meta musings 😅

Also all the typos ...

(And who sent the letter and hit the body??? 😭)

@sweetlittlevampire @fandom-glazed @elenirlachlagos @allhailthedramallama @luckymoony @kyrrahbird @i-love-him-on-purpose

Tomorrow I'll watch the jast two episodes and ... I can't quite believe it 😔

I'm just happy that I'm reading the book now and still got so much to look forward to there, otherwise I think l might draw out this show even longer

#the untamed #sophie watches the untamed #wei wuxian #wwx #lan wangji #wangxian #lan xichen #jin guangyao #jin ling #jiang cheng #nie huaisang

[thisiskatsblog]

Hi Kat, I'm feeling sad and sort of mad here so I might rant, I'd like to know what you think I don't know if you're gonna post it or answer it to avoid controversy and negativity in your blog but I appreciate you got to read it bc I needed to vent, tysm in advance...

I see so many people hating on Harry because he said "clothes are fun" without "making any social statement about it and that he doesn't recognize his privilege of wearing what he wants cause he's rich and famous" and can I just say that it's because of that same privilege he's so influential and has helped so many queer fans to be who they want to be, he's using his privilege for good and also, I hate when people try to force activism out of everyone...

I understand being critical but activism should be genuine and intentional. It just seems to me that they're people from the q community who had an agenda against him before this interview got released, sometimes it doesn't even seen this is about social justice. I've seen the most cruel and hateful comments wishing for him to be miserable and unsuccessful (that's not happening anytime sooner, honey, go off)...

And they don't really know him, they don't know he does more than waving flags and putting stickers on his guitar, he has donated to non-profits, spent money on queer artists, he protested and signed petitions for BLM, he has helped fans to come out, he does have talked on social issues, they're just looking for a reason to be mad tbh...

He might not get too deeply political because he has stated that politics divide people and that is 100% true. He has INDEED recognized he is privileged on a RS interview and that he just wants to show people he sees them and he's here for them. Everybody does activism in different ways, and Harry's certainly isn't performative, he's not obnoxious about it but he's not tone deaf either, he's self-aware.Honestly, I don't understand what this people want?...

If they see this cis boy speaking on gender issues and gender expression on a Vogue interview and talking about trans/nb/gnc people who are opressed then they may fill Twitter with comments like "he doesn't do anything for us, why is he talking about it? he's not our icon" but if he doesn't do it then he's pandering? Do they want an ally who leads a movement and speaks on issues or an ally who does acts of service for the movement and doesn't speak for it? I don't understand, idk if I will..

Finally, no one should be a certain sexuality to be allowed to break gender roles, yes, straight people do have privilege even when they dress androgynous but they shouldn't be cancelled for that...

Now, entering hypothetical (basically confirmed) field, can we talk about how problematic is accusing a closeted person of pandering? If someone have ever told artists like Bowie or Mercury to "stop profiting of queer people" while they weren't out in the public eye, then no one would have paved the way for other men to express themselves, break toxic masculinity and help other gender non-conforming kids. Kids like Janelle Monaé, Billy Porter, Lil Nas, P!nk, Sam Smith and yes, Harry Styles.

(that was the end of my rant btw, it was like 8 asks, I think, hope nothing got lost, sorry for the length but this people literally want Harry to fail because of freaking wearing a skirt and not getting too political about it and I was certainly not having it)

----------------------- Hi anon,

They all arrived! 

I’m glad it helps you just to be able to vent, without expecting to be published, so anyone who needs a vent: do feel free to use the service of my inbox 😊

I will publish because I think you are making a few interesting points.

It’s true that Harry can do the things he does because he is privileged – and I completely agree with you that it’s a good thing he is using that privilege to the fullest and thereby changes things for the better for other queer people.

On the other hand, I do understand the frustration of queer people who are less privileged when they wish he would recognize that privilege. It isn’t true that in this day and age anyone can dress the way Harry does on the cover of Vogue, and it could make his “statement”, which in itself is positive for queer people, all the more powerful if he recognized it and expressed his wish for that to change. To me, it’s a question of gradation. Wearing a ruffled dress is really good and changes lives; saying that you wish everyone had the freedom to wear that dress in the way you now have that freedom is even better and raises awareness of intersectionality (when you are LGBTQ and poor, being LGBTQ is more difficult than when you are LGBTQ and rich).

I don’t think Harry is the kind of person you’d need to force activism out of, I do see him as someone who has been activist as well as political on many occasions. Maybe not as political and activist as I’d like him to be, maybe not in the way I would be in his position, but definitely committed to the same causes that I find important, and not afraid of using the position he has to influence when he feels comfortable to do so. I wish he’d been more vocal on a great number of occasions, but I agree with you in that you cannot look at your idols in music and simply expect them to be fervent and perfect political activists. Art can be activist, but it doesn’t have to be, you cannot expect it to be.

Furthermore, I think Harry definitely has some privilege that he’s shown to be unaware of, and I’ve also seen him take things in, learn, change his position (see the RS interview you also mention), and become more vocal politically. In other words: Harry is human.

I have not seen the criticism you are talking about, and it seems there have been various different ones, so I won’t be going into them, some seem more valid, others are not. In any case I would be very hesitant to put it all aside as “queer people who had an agenda against him” or “they’re just looking for a reason to get mad”. That thinking may put you at ease, and stay on your side of things, but it won’t help the conversation. I think it’s important when you’re on two sides of an argument, to try and understand where the unmet need is on the “other” side.

Since I haven’t seen the original arguments, I am not completely clear on this – but it seems that the common thread in your understanding of the criticism he receives is that Harry’s ambiguous identity (while having amply suggested he may be not cis/straight, he hasn’t been straightforward about it) makes it possible for people to criticize him both ways.

I agree with you that you do not need to be queer to be allowed to break gender norms, and that closeted people should not be criticized for breaking gender norms and paving the way, to come out themselves, and for others. But I do see where the frustration on the other side comes from – I don’t think it’s necessarily evil willed towards Harry. What I see, a strong wish and urgent need to have out and proud role models who do these things; and – guessing that a lot of the people criticizing him suspect he is indeed closeted – an enormous frustration that closeting still happens, and about the mixed messages Harry, as a role model, may implicitly gives to queer kids in this way. It’s okay to dress outrageously and challenge norms but it’s not okay to be explicit about your identity and orientation, do keep that vague. I personally feel extremely frustrated about that, even if I also believe this is outside Harry’s will.

“We don’t talk enough, we should open up, before it’s all too much…”

Anyway, long story short anon: I get you. And I think I get the other side too. In the end we all choose whether we want to see the glass as half full or half empty. And I’m siding with you that it’s half full, and with the critics that I wish it were completely full, but then again with you that you cannot really fault Harry for that not (yet) being the case... But it’s okay for it to be said: I wish the glass were full.

#i hope that addresses it all #this was a long ask #ask #anonymous #coming out #gender #vogue #harry #Anonymous

[gg-astrology]

hiii!! i'm that hannah montana but seokjin agenda anon, tell hi to your friend!! the lvl of my satisfaction is impossible to describe, thank you for your service. and yes, you've fulfilled my request!! i really appreciate your efforts, it was on point!! can i request more bangtan things?? only if it's alright with you :| can you do the same ranking for them from ' i'm rich 3$, wine and dine me' to 'i have a rolled blanket as my pillow' *cough* jk *cough*. from that to a simpler lifestyle? thk!

Hey there!! 💕❤️💕 Welcome back!!! 💕❤️💕💕❤️💕 slkskjnsdkjns she saw this and im really glad u like it!! 💕❤️💕💕❤️💕 

U can! 💕❤️💕Me and my friend really like your questions because it’s very thoughtful and fun!! 💕❤️💕 

EDIT: My friend said they interpreted this question differently into ‘how complex vs simple’ their lifestyle is and!!!!!!!!!! maybe we’ll edit and add it in anon if u send in another ask I’ll ask my friend if they want to answer?? I’m sorry!!!!! My 2nd house sun immediately: Wealth  

Please send us more questions, but maybe not this one bc it’s about their personal lifestyle/how they live (+ not their personalities or what they’ve shown us) and it may be treading on 1. making assumptions about their personal life in which we’re in no authoritative position to commentate on  

2. we can obviously talk about how we view them and write commentaries on how we feel/what we think, but there’s also a line where we have to acknowledge people might see us as credible information/authority in our own rights when it’s out in public/shared to an audience 

3. what they’ve shown us clear boundaries between public figures and their audience might be wiser 

4. acknowledging our position of power + influence to the community rather than ignoring the fact that our words have sway will help us in the long-run by making conscious, thoughtful choices on what we could give/bring to the fan/outside community as well. 

I hope this makes sense?? 💕❤️💕 I hope it’s ok if I mulled it over last night and thought I might not – it might not be the best idea to talk about it/put it out there?? 

Please don’t feel bad at all!! 💕❤️💕I really love your questions and I actually wrote as I tried to figure out how to do this (literally just disclaimers before I realized oh maybe there’s no way to do this properly and I shouldn’t??) – I don’t want you to get out of this ask empty-handed, so if it makes it any better – I’ll publish my working through below the read more and you might see what I was working out as I try to answer your question?? 💕❤️💕 

Long commentary on BTS privilege, social inequality + wealth disparities in the real world (disclaimer for this ask?)  +  Working Outs and Why It Didn’t Work ⬇️

Note: From here on below is me writing my thoughts down as I tried to answer the ask, I hope that – even though I couldn’t answer your question – this is a good answer in other regards either way? Hopefully? 

Just a disclaimer note on BTS and this topic as well: In my head I’m immediately going into commentary about social inequality, wealth disparity and how poverty + classism exists in real life. 

Just a quick tangent, but real people suffer from this issue. Our society have consequences when it comes to wealth inequality + the ability to afford basic human amenities (healthcare, living/housing, food, education, transportation, disabilities etc.) 

Even when they’re relatable, BTS are billionaires who knows their position is privileged. Lets - make that clear for a second.  

They still do their best in variety shows where they have to compete/entertain the audience. What I’m trying to say is. I’d rather not ignore/make note that there’s a difference between being privileged, being aware of these issues and still preferring simpler lifestyles for themselves. Than being ignorant and completely insensitive/unaffected from the matter. They’re still privileged, let’s make that clear. And thus, as relatable as they are to the public/audience, they benefit from the social/economical/political power they have given by those around them (their audience, accessibility medias and production).  

In the context that is related (i.e. army joking that BTS fights over ramen) – BTS have never once shown that they’re unaware of their wealth + privilege, even it was a joke – the thing that is missing is the context –  they’re usually seen competing in BTS run/gayo, but it’s produced to let them showcase their dynamic and chemistry  - the prize (commodities/money) was never actually the main focus. 

A highly competitive game with members who know each other well - is actually what these shows are about. 

BTS doesn’t glorify their own wealth, nor have they acted as if they are poor in order to gain relatability or sympathy from the audience/masses (looking at armis 💜 who does this. delete armi 💜) 

It’s a part of why they have fans and why people like them. They’re able to sell products + contribute to relief/charity organizations and advocate campaigns.  Whilst they are in position of privilege compared to others - they’ve never not acknowledged that they could afford to do so for reasonable personal requests (i.e. safety on flights and in airports, security in their home, equipments to perform/produce with, reaching out to audiences that usually never has the opportunity to connect with them despite liking them for a long time, etc.)

I think it’s just important to note - for those who are armys and those who are looking at it from the outside - that this is what we see and why we’re talking about this. 

I just want us to acknowledge that they’re privileged and their lifestyle choices are personal, I think that’s what I’m doing here. 

So, commentary on social inequality of the world we all live in + BTS privilege in all this/disparities. check.

This is going to be disgustingly generalized to an incredible amount because we don’t have houses – to be completely honest, within the context of the question having houses is exactly what we need for these types of answers. 

From a technical stand-point, not having houses when we’re talking about specific contexts within a person’s life (basically why we have so many houses - for different contexts) – will make this reading terribly vague and misleading as well. 

Actually, should we do this at all.. because simply saying oh Taurus/Libra placements would want materialistic things to show x, y, z is incredibly misgiving and is like a blanket statement. Without houses in question, there’s no specification on what it is used for or what kind, or what type of actions/manifestations these signs are going to have in order to express themselves.  

Planets in signs can only do so much to talk about the energy that is being produced – placing them in houses and context, gives them manifestation that doesn’t simply exist in a vacuum by itself.

All placements in a chart make up a cohesive picture of what it is used for, when and where. With only the how/why (placements) — the best I can probably do to answer the question is just explain how it could possibly manifest and why/what reasoning it may have to express itself that way.

While that is something I could? probably talk about. It… just doesn’t answer the question in a way that’s satisfying. This question is really good… and there’s a way to get there and give it the answer it wants. But.. with what we have, it’s a disservice to answer half-right and do a poor job overall, than to actually give the full answer.

Hnnnfghfnhgn there’s also.. some disclaimers on personal life for idols/public figures and how this might.. be almost assuming or intruding on that territory? From a glance it isn’t like it’s not something they’ve not shown us publicly or told us about. But they also didn’t advertise it, and what they do with their personal life/lifestyle– is that something we (as fan) are in anyway, shape or form, capable or have any voice to talk about as if we know what they’re doing? Does that? make sense? 

Like, intruding as in - do we have any authority to tell them to get a pillow or stop drinking wine or something like that. Speculate, on what restaurant they go to/how $$$ it is, or does things that are privileged, things that aren’t going to han river to bike, etc. Can we really pick and choose certain choices they choose to do with their lifestyle, while being completely separated from reality of their other?

Idk.. this is getting complicated.. but maybe sticking to things they are proud of and does talk about openly/happily in their public and professional persona might be better… considering that they should have? a modicum of personal life back to themselves? we could at least do that and choose to respect them right… thats? hm. what’s right.

Fine wine and dine, lavish restaurants and other personal choices on their expenses and love for/lifestyle… maybe.. its for the best if we leave it to their own authority and discretion, over their own private/personal life and what they choose to share with people they know/care for/love. 

I think the end all of it might just be: can I imagine them coming to say to us “army, you know how I am right? I’m like this in my personal lifestyle/choice” – and of what they could say, I don’t think that’s something they may be willing to share without their explicit consent, nor can I imagine it right now if it’s about messy habits or a flaw they may have. So hm. 

The question addresses simpler lifestyle too – we don’t have authority to commentate on JK’s pillow choices, but being exposed like that suddenly might not be something he’s entirely comfortable with or would advertise to others as well? Not to mention, they all seem to not advertise anything that is outrageously privileged that would smack anyone in the face – they’re pretty sensitive to keeping things personal, private, under-wraps. Even when they choose to eat at a well-known restaurant, it’s not in bad-taste or done frivolously. In a way, they all tend to keep a simpler lifestyle about them to not let their wealth + privilege get in the way of their work + connecting to us, focusing solely on what their skills are + performance and music. 

Simply going by that.. is it wise to talk about something we might just choose to show decency/a modicum of respect for the idol’s privacy maybe.. uhhdfjgnn i!!!!!!!!! there’s thoughts and feelings and im just trying to let it out so it makes sense and then i can navigate between it and see what i can do/the right way to talk about it (if it exists)!!

God.. I guess there’s.. no way I can possibly do this?? Considering if I think about it from all sides – I can’t approach it technically, without houses. I literally can’t answer this question, it isn’t about choice because answering this question is directly asking about the houses. So I literally can’t answer correctly. I also can’t – or well, I don’t think the moral issue is ok here when I think further on it. Consequences are inevitable with all posts/production, but optimizing it so that it affects people positively and minimize damage to others is always something to check through. This may not be a good idea, just to do. So maybe not. 

Hhndndhnndf ok,,, gotta,,, write something for the introduction so it makes sense.

Note: I did go through this, edit and write some additional paragraphs to make it make sense. But I hope this? gives you insight or some thoughts to my working process and what I consider/go through when I make these posts as well? Thank u for ur time, I hope it isn’t too disappointing ;;  let me know what u think/how u feel anon I’m sorry I couldn’t do this question but please let me know if you’re ok or not!!!! 💕❤️💕💕❤️💕

#anon #asks #bts asks #idol asks #bts astrology #astrology asks #hhhHhhhHHhhHHHh me disappointed in myself #me with a 2nd house stel: Wealth?? #now that i think about it #im so sorry i might've misinterpreted the q and?? #pls dont feel bad :((( or sad :(( at all #this is basically just a wealth + privacy + no houses agenda #and yes its also an eat the rich agenda

[yoon-ity]

i'm anon from earlier: i don't actually mean to trivialize your experiences by, i suppose, kind of hypocritically criticizing Your wording. i apologize for that. my ask was more coming from a place of... a lot of these people are young, and only have their own experiences to inform their words, and while you don't have to hold their hand or baby them, i do think you catch more flies with honey in some of these cases. esp when we might not know their own identity and ideology surrounding it /1

i know i got heated too. it IS important to talk about sensitivity esp rn: my ask comes from more of a place of practicality, and bit of a bleeding heart bc i know how it hurts to hear harsh words, even and esp when they make good points... and i think it can be hard to be heard, if we're all yelling. and it just. hasn't felt good watching all the fighting. i'm sorry again for kind of jumping down your throat there, i hope this better explains my POV. i hope you have a better day, take care /2

No of course you didn’t “mean” to, no one “means” to do anything, but your intentions behind what you decided to say yesterday doesn’t matter to me. I don’t care what your intentions were, your actions still trivialized me and my family’s experiences as minorities. I acknowledge your apology, but I don’t accept it at all, and nothing will change my mind on that. Of course you didn’t know my race or sexuality or whatever my mother had to go through as an Asian woman, but would you have even apologized to me if you didn’t know of these experiences? 

You wanted me to apologize to someone because I was upset about them comparing rarepair shippers to the struggles of minorities. You told me to move on from this as if they didn’t just compare people getting hate messages to the oppression and racism my mother has to experience, to the struggles of other races. People are dying because of their color of their skin. It isn’t just some fucking random anonymous hate. People have lost THEIR LIVES just because they existed. These are not the same, and the fact that the rarepairers were compared to minorities was disrespectful. 

If I was a cishet white man, would you even consider sending an apology regarding your hypocrisy? If I was just standing up for minority groups if I was from a position of privilege? 

The answer is no, you wouldn’t. You feel bad because I shared with you the struggles my family had to go through. You told me to block and move on and act like Jay didn’t undermine the struggle minorities like my mother go through. Even if I wasn’t a minority, why should I just ignore how they tried to make that comparison? It’s a disgusting belittlement of the struggle minorities go through on a day to day basis. 

I will not accept your apology. Your intentions do not excuse your actions, and I will not see it as such. 

a lot of these people are young, and only have their own experiences to inform their words, and while you don't have to hold their hand or baby them, i do think you catch more flies with honey in some of these cases. esp when we might not know their own identity and ideology surrounding it

First of all, you phrase this as if they are a child and I am an adult. Let me get this straight for you: TimeturnerJay is an adult. I am a minor. We are both writers. They are literally older than me, and most likely has more experience than me concerning life and figuring out their identity/ideology. I shouldn’t have to be the one to have to coddle Jay’s needs. 

Not to say that Jay should be holding my hand or babying me, but my point is: they are an adult. They should know better, and should know of the current political crisis. They knew what they comparison was implying, and they still said it anyways. 

Here’s the thing though. They can go and compare their experience as a minority to whatever the fuck is going on with the rarepair shippers, but the way they phrased/worded it was extremely belittling for other minorities that have been oppressed, especially regarding race, because I was informed that Jay was comparing their experience as a member of the LGBTQ+ community to what is happening to the rarepair shippers. 

Again, they can compare their experience to that all they want. I don’t care. My problem is that they said, “You’re systematically hunting down and persecuting a minority of your group.” And when Nabbbal called them out for comparing fandom shippers to the actual oppression of minorities, they then said that they were aware of what they said, and that they weren’t going to apologize for their comparison. Nabbbal asked them to rephrase it and to reword it. Jay has not reworded it, and they have not responded to Nabbal since. 

We both have every right to be offended and hurt by this, but I know Nabbbal was just pointing it out. Personally, I was hurt by this, and only replied once I wasn’t in an extreme place of anger. Yes, I used harsh words, but that does not mean I was angry in the moment that I wrote my response. 

If I wrote my response to Jay when I was angry, it would’ve been nonsensical at best, and even more so rude and offensive at worst.

Jay has said they knew what they were saying, knew the implications of this, and has not apologized or reworded it upon the request of a minority. 

i know i got heated too. it IS important to talk about sensitivity esp rn: my ask comes from more of a place of practicality, and bit of a bleeding heart bc i know how it hurts to hear harsh words, even and esp when they make good points...

Do not compare me to you. 

You got angry at me because I called someone a bitch and you told me to get over myself. I was upset because someone wanted to compare these rarepairers to the actual oppression and struggle of minorities. We are not the same, do not act like our anger came from the same place. You told me to block Jay and move on from this, as if they weren’t trivializing the experiences of minorities, intentional or not. Just like you did to me yesterday. 

I’m not going to coddle you for being a bleeding heart because chances are you’re older than me too. I don’t care about your sensitivity, nor do I care about anyone else’s. You are a stranger to me. Even if I do know you, you are hiding your identity by being anonymous. I don’t know you. 

If you can’t handle hearing or seeing harsh words, then you should not be participating in discourse because not everyone is going to coddle you and your bleeding heart/sensitivity. 

I am not an empathetic or sympathetic person. I am not going to empathize or sympathize with you because you can’t handle a few harsh words on the internet that wasn’t even directed at you. 

Stop trying to explain yourself to me. You’re phrasing your words and talking about being a bleeding heart and framing yourself as if you didn’t trivialize and belittle my experience as a minority too. You are as much as an asshole as I am, but at least I have the balls to own up to it. 

Whether intentional or not, you’re doing the exact same thing Shane Dawson did when he would tell people he was an empathetic all the time. To deflect and manipulate people into think that he was a kind, sensible person who could do no wrong, which is how he managed to get away with so much, for so long. 

You are doing the same thing to me by “apologizing” for your actions with excuses. What am I supposed to say or react to this information? What was your reason for telling me this in the first place? It makes no sense, especially since you came back to me to apologize and explain yourself. Which I never asked you to do. Again, you came to me, apologizing and bringing up all this bleeding heart stuff and how you just can’t stand to see that. 

You saying that turns it back to me, and would then, theoretically, lead to me apologizing to you, despite the fact I have no will or reason to apologize to you. You disrespected and trivialized me and my family. I called you out. End of story, yet you’re telling me things that would make some other people apologize for no reason. 

and i think it can be hard to be heard, if we're all yelling. and it just. hasn't felt good watching all the fighting. i'm sorry again for kind of jumping down your throat there, i hope this better explains my POV. i hope you have a better day, take care /2 

You are under no obligation to witness the discourse. It’s just like you said, you can just block and ignore it. So here are a few questions you should ask yourself, anon. 

Why did you not block me and immediately ignore it? Why did you think that you were in a position of power to tell me what to do, while not having to do the exact same thing?

Why did you attack me, and then immediately apologize the next day when I told you my mother almost died? That she could be assaulted at any point because she’s Asian? 

What exactly are you apologizing for and why? Are you apologizing for you hypocrisy or are you apologizing because I called you out for doing the exact same thing Jay did?

Why did you feel the need to tell me you had a bleeding heart and that you’re sensitive regarding other people? 

If you didn’t feel good watching all this fighting and yelling, then why did you proceed to do the exact same thing to me? 

Are you trying to explain yourself to me because you feel like I genuinely misunderstood you, because you weren’t thinking straight, or are you explaining so you don’t seem like that much of an asshole? 

Once again, your apology is not accepted. You disrespected me and my family’s struggles, while hiding behind your screen while being anonymous, no less. And your apology to me was STILL anonymous, while still being riddled with excuses (bleeding heart, not wanting to see people fight, sensitivity, etc). 

Do you think that matters to me? An apology from a complete stranger that I will never know who disrespected and belittled me and my family’s struggles? Who tried to tell me what to do? You came to me and told me what to do, while ignoring your own advice, and CONTINUING to ignore your own advice even after you had some clarity.  

I never asked for your POV, I never asked for an apology, yet you still gave them to me anyways. 

I am not your friend. I do not know you. Do not phrase your words like we are. 

Do not contact me again. Any further asks and messages from you will be deleted. 

#aprici's angst train #discourse #anon #anonymous #i never even attacked you personally as far as i know lmao and yet you still disrespected me LMAO the audacity

[inkognito97]

Wow, I'm so excited about self-harming Obi-Wan. Can you please continue this one? What if he would try to do this to himself again? Or no?

@blastwaveinsideofme

Also, WARNING! Self-harm is for a lot of people a serious and sensitive topic. So, I advice you not to read, if you have any kind of problems concerning this topic.

Obi-Wan was glad to be back at the temple again, back home in his own quarters. Anakin had his own rooms, he was sharing them with his Padawan, but Obi-Wan still resided in his former Master’s old quarters, a privilege of being a Council member. Despite the years that had passed since Qui-Gon died, there was still something of him that had remained behind in these familiar rooms.

There were of course his plants that Obi-Wan had kept and taken care of, there were some old photos and even some belongings that had once been owned by the tall and long haired man. Yet, Obi-Wan had also made sure to change the rooms, making them his. He was his own man after all, not a copy of his former Master.

A tired and nostalgic smile appeared on his bearded features. He carelessly hung his robe over a chair, got rid of his boots - leaving them near the entrance - and then brought his travel back into the larger bedroom. He put it on the ground, while he sat on the large bed. It was still the on Qui-Gon had used, therefore it was a little larger than the usual human standard. Obi-Wan didn’t mind, not when it reminded him of many nights he had spent here with his Master resting next to him, or curled around him. 

When he had became the man’s Padawan, they had not gotten along, not with Xanatos’ shadow lurking over them and Qui-Gon HAD hurt him a lot of times, there was just no denying it. But they had warmed up to each other, began carrying for each other, so Obi-Wan had not seen how MUCH the older man had actually cared about him, not after he had almost killed himself. After this incident, he had often crawled into his Master’s bed, sometimes just needing his calming presence close by and sometimes actually craving physical contact. Qui-Gon had never pushed him out, not even when Obi-Wan had been sick with the flu. As a result, Qui-Gon had also caught it, but he had not been mad at his Padawan, not at all. 

Obi-Wan let out a sigh and let himself fall back onto the bed. He gazed up at the ceiling for a few moments, lying half on his bed, with his feet still standing firmly on the soft carpet and his arms outstretched. He didn’t want to move, but he knew that his bones would protest later, if he did not. With another sigh, he rolled and moved until he was lying on his side, arms outstretched and his face halfway hidden in a pillow. His blue-green eyes came to rest on his bared wrist, were the remains of his past were forever present.

The ginger haired Jedi closed his hands into tight fists and then shut his eyes just as tightly, slipping into an old memory…

Obi-Wan was not sure what to think. He should maybe be happy to be allowed to finally leave the healer’s wing, but he wasn’t. He did not want to return to the place that was supposed to be his home, but was the setting, where he had almost died, by his own hand. 

Neither did he want to be supervised like a toddler. He had made a mistake, he knew that and he was not stupid enough to try again any time soon, or was he. He unconsciously bit his lip. He should definitely stop thinking like this. Had it gone after the healers’ will, he would not be returning to his quarters anyway. He would be put into a cell like room, with soft walls and nothing with which he could hurt (or entertain) himself. Obi-Wan had once seen such a cell up close, during a failed negotiation mission with his Master. Speaking of which, the man had not yet said a single word to him, not since he had spoken to the healers. The Padawan guessed that he was running their words through his head, though he could not be sure, not with the bond closed. A precaution from the healers.

Suddenly Qui-Gon stopped walking and only his instincts saved Obi-Wan from running into the man, who was already tipping the Code into the lock next to the door. The door slit open and they entered, discarding their boots at the entrance. Then, the older Jedi more or less stirred them towards the living room and nudged Obi-Wan to sit onto the worn out looking brown leather couch.

The Padawan did not look up, his gaze rested solemnly on his folded hands, without really seeing them. A sigh escaped the older man and he tiredly rubbed his nose.

“Obi-Wan… do you have any more… blades, in your possession?” his mood was not readable through his voice.

The ginger haired teenager tilted his head and then, he shrugged.

“I need you to be honest with me, Padawan,” there was a certain edge to his voice.

“I don’t know,” he knew his voice sounded monotone, but he did not care. All he wanted, was to be left alone. He did not want anyone else to prod him for answers he did not want to give, he did not want Bant to stick her gills into this, he did not want Garen or Reeft to try to cheer him up and he certainly did not want to talk to Siri either. He also did not want any healer to ask stupid question. “Are you alright? How are you feeling?” He was totally fine and feeling awesome of course, why else would he have cut himself open. Stupid healers and their mindless questions and not to forget the few Masters who had come to visit. Obi-Wan had ignored all of their questions.

The only one, who had not yet tried to ask after the why, was Qui-Gon Jinn. A part of Obi-Wan, the biggest part of him actually, believed that the man simply did not care enough to ask. Another, smaller and hopeful part - even though it had grown smaller and smaller since the beginning of his apprenticeship under the infamous Master Jinn - wished that the man would understand his need for privacy.

“Alright,” he sounded exhausted. “You will stay in my bedroom until I am sure that there is nothing in your room… I have to look through your personal things though.” He waited for any kind of reaction, an acknowledgement or perhaps the wish to do it together, but nothing came.

“You DO realize that… what you have done… is wrong?”

“Why?”

“Excuse me?” he sounded genuinely taken aback by the one-word question. Had Obi-Wan looked up, he would have seen that the man’s gaze was puzzled.

“Why is it wrong?” he challenged. “Who says it wasn’t the will of the Force?”

“Was it the will of the Force?” Qui-Gon asked worried.

Obi-Wan shrugged.

Under normal circumstances, Qui-Gon would have gotten frustrated with his Padawan’s behavior, but right now, he was only worried. There was something greatly wrong with the boy and he needed to find out what it was, in order to make it better, in order to make Obi-Wan feel better. The Jedi Master had still not gotten over the shock of finding his Padawan bleeding on the floor of his own bedroom, with his wrists slid open and his eyes already glassing over. He would never forget the desolate look in the boy’s eyes, nor the endless hours of waiting and hoping that the healers would win the fight for his Padawan’s life. It had been a close call, Qui-Gon was very much aware of that. He had almost felt his Padawan, he would not do so again.

“Well…” the bearded male cleared his throat, “you are going to see the mind healers from now on, also, regular check ups within the medical bay are required also.”

For the first time since the incident, there was a real reaction from the boy. His displeasure was palpable in the air that surrounded him and Qui-Gon would have to be blind to not see it.

Silently and in the privacy of his own mind, Obi-Wan cursed all the healers in the Jedi temple. If they truly thought he would open up to one of them, they would get a big surprise. There was no way he would speak a single word with them, no way.

“Ok… is there perhaps anything else that you need, that you want?” Qui-Gon asked hopefully. Perhaps he could reawaken his boy’s spirits with this.

“Yes,” Qui-Gon waited impatiently. Blue-green eyes finally looked up. “Leave me alone.”

The Jedi Master blinked. He should have expected that. “Very well, you may go to my bedroom, stay there until I say otherwise, or I will lock the door, understood.”

Obi-Wan nodded, then he stood up and walked to the privacy he so craved. He ignored the pair of icy blue eyes that followed his every move.

Obi-Wan came back to reality and pushed himself onto his back, his arms still outstretched. He was staring at the ceiling again and he realized that this was the exact same position he had taken, all those years ago, when he had first entered his Master’s bedchamber. He had stared at the ceiling than too, but his mind had been empty then.

Obi-Wan hummed in thought. Even in this early stage, he had have a lot of luck, even though his Padawan self had not thought so, of course not. His Padawan self had actually hated Qui-Gon during the first few weeks, until the man had been called to a mission and had left him behind. 

Needless to say, the healers had taken the opportunity and Obi-Wan had found himself drugged and sometimes even bound. The latter being the case, when they were short on personal. When they had enough people, he had been watched 24/7, even while taking a shower or going to the fresher, it had been highly unpleasant to say the least. Thankfully it had only been two weeks till Qui-Gon returned and literally saved him. He had never seen the man so angry before, even in his drugged stayed, he could still remember the long haired man’s anger at finding his Padawan kept like an animal and in a drugged state.

What followed, had probably been the worst days in Obi-Wan’s whole life. Fourteen days had seemingly been enough to actually get addicted to the medication he had gotten. Obi-Wan was no fool, he knew that the healers had wanted to make him feel absolutely nothing, no emotional at all, mostly because they had hoped to make him more compliant with the mind healers. For them, he had just been an interesting project. Too bad for them that his drugged self had been worse than his - at that point - depressed normal self.

A silent tear slipped from Obi-Wan’s eye into his beard. The things he had done and said to Qui-Gon during his cold withdrawal. He knew he had hurt the man. Hell, he had even said, “I hate you!” directly into his Master’s face, while the man had pinned him down onto the bed, wrestling the sharp knife out of his hands. Obi-Wan could not remember, from where he had obtained the knife, someone must have given it to him, because his old Master had made sure that such things were far out of his reach. Obi-Wan had no idea, who it could have been. But he knew for a fact that Qui-Gon had found out.

The days after, he had refused to eat or drink, to a point, were it had gotten life-threatening. Even the older Jedi’s threats to take him back to the healers or to Force feed him, had not made him eat.

It was only when, one quiet evening, Qui-Gon had slipped under the covers and literally wrapped himself around him and told him, how much he cared and how much he worried, that Obi-Wan had finally given in. He had also stopped hating his Master then. It had been the beginning of his healing phase, though he had never told the assigned mind healers a single word, Qui-Gon had been enough.

In the here and now, Obi-Wan was almost asleep, only on the edge of dreams and awareness. Something held him back and he had no idea what it was. Suddenly, a warm feeling passed through him. It was awfully familiar, though Obi-Wan could not place it and it was, as if someone had kissed his cheek. An invisible burden had been taken off from him and it was enough to push him deep into the lands of dreams and wishes.

Had he opened his eye however, the ginger haired Council member would have seen the smiling blue form of a long haired Jedi, who had died a long, long time ago…

#star wars #obi wan kenobi #qui gon jinn #force ghost #force ghost qui-gon #self harm #past self harm #padawan obi-wan #memories #trauma #depression #healers #they are idiots in this one #hurt/comfort #dealing with depression #protective qui-gon #qui-gon is awesome #prompt #blastwaveinsideofme

[words-writ-in-starlight]

UM HI. So I'm the one that sent the ask about the magical gf things and I have a confession. I already knew it was from your magical book and was kinda subtly hoping you would talk about it?!?!?! I"M SO SORRY but like I said I'm so invested in this crap and would read the entire frikin thing. ALSO I LOVED THE EXCERPT. And now I'm leaving before I disgrace myself any further.

WAIT NO DON’T LEAVE

SO HERE’S IRONY FOR YOU: you came in and didn’t want to bug me so you asked in like a sideways way, BUT I DIDN’T WANT TO BUG YOU, so I didn’t talk about it.  (I’m a mess, I’m sorry, y’all gotta be explicit about this stuff because I have no self-confidence.)

BUT ON THAT NOTE let’s talk about perceptions of sex and romance in Alleirat?  Like?  I’m into it?

Earth is where the trouble comes from

So you know the code of chivalric love, where like the fair and pure maiden is adored from afar by the knight and on the one hand it’s kind of cool but on the other hand it’s predicated on the fair and pure maiden who can’t reciprocate or even really acknowledge what’s going on?  I like that first half but the second half bothers me like FUCK so I made a better version.

In Alleirat, sex and romance are considered linked, but not intrinsically so–having casual sexual partners is fine as long as your partner is aware and good with it, and sexual experimentation is considered normal (even expected) between the ages of like 16 and like mid-to-late twenties.  (People who are like ‘I am gay/straight and I am EXCLUSIVELY gay/straight and I have never experimented with another gender’ are considered weird and kind of to have missed out?  Like, they’re thought of as…having skipped an important life stage?  Societies Are Problematic, is my point here.)  Monogamy is common, but not mandatory, and conditional monogamy (which I’m about to get into) is pretty normal.

So, the courtly love arrangement, which is called amuniasa.  Like, say that you are a woman and you work closely with another woman, and you fall in love with her.  And you’re very much in love with her (commitment is Serious Business in Alleirat and cheating is considered an actual crime) and you tell her as much.  Now she has two options.  Either she can take you up on it and you can attempt a relationship, or she can acknowledge the honor you’re doing her with your feelings and declare herself amiasa, or ‘the beloved.’  Then you have the choice to remain committed to her as amdri (the lover).  Some basic rules of amuniasa include:

Amuniasa is generally given the same level of importance as marriage, and there are a very short list of reasons that are considered valid to dissolve it.  

Amdrin and amiasan are permitted, but not required, to engage in other romantic and sexual relationships.  It is common and accepted for someone to have both a spouse and an amdri/amiasa, although it’s not frowned upon if someone devotes themselves wholly to their amiasa.

Brenneth’s right-hand during their previous stint in Alleirat (Krei The Tree Lesbian’s mother Torei) was Brenneth’s amdri, and never took another romantic partner during the remainder of her life.  Brenneth and Torei are held up as sort of the Platonic ideal of devotion and amuniasa.  (Krei’s coloring also suggests that her father looked like Brenneth, but she never met him.)

The amiasa has a limited period of time to change their mind (often one year), and leading your amdri on with hints that you might one day return their feelings (or with sex) is considered incredibly cruel and dishonorable, and is a valid reason to dissolve the relationship.  (Your amdri is functionally off limits for sex for this reason.)

Hassling your amiasa and trying to force them to return your feelings is not permitted and is a valid reason to dissolve the relationship.  It can also get you arrested, sent out of the city, or placed under what basically sums up as a restraining order.

It is standard for the amdri to give gifts to their amiasa, or to perform great deeds in their name if they’re in a position to do so (also a thing that Torei is considered the ideal of).  Alternatively, an amdri might cook for their amiasa or perform another kind of service, like braiding hair, tending children, etc.  This is because Alleirat views service and gift giving as a mandatory core of every romantic relationship (…this extends to orgasms), not because the amdri is viewed as in any way subordinate or servile to their amiasa.  The amdri considers it a privilege to perform service and give gifts, and the amiasa recognizes the honor being accorded to them.

It’s actually not common for amdri and amiasa to continue working closely unless it’s necessary, as it’s believed that this is unfair to the amdri.  They interact largely socially and on their own terms, to the extent that the amdri is comfortable with–this might be several visits in a week, or the amdri might travel quite a distance.  (Torei is considered an outlier, as she took a position as the captain of her amiasa’s guard and proceeded to live, work, and spend all her time with Brenneth for four years.  …there are songs about Torei’s devotion and selflessness and disregard for her own pain, is what I’m getting at here.)

It IS common for your amdri or amiasa to know your children, if you have any, and is generally considered their de facto guardian in the event of a disaster.

It is NOT UNHEARD OF for someone to executively decide not to even try to have a relationship and act as an amdri without telling their amiasa.  This is generally because they believe they have no chance with the other person and that their attention would make their amiasa uncomfortable, such as a man falling in love with a lesbian, or someone falling in love with someone aromantic.  This is considered fine, but it also means that you have no formal claim on the other person.

This can also be because they have a terrible (justified) guilt complex and believe that the other person could never reciprocate as a result of four years of mutual attempted murder.  Not that I’m in any way vagueblogging about any of my characters here.

ANYWAY THIS HAS BEEN A PRIMER ON LOVE AND ROMANCE IN ALLEIRAT, PLEASE FEEL FREE TO ASK OTHER QUESTIONS.

#worldwalker #original work #brenneth #crispin #krei #torei #torei and brenneth are like serious shit in alleirat #like #there are songs about torei's devotion to brenneth #brenneth discovers this and is horrified #also torei was a terrible/wonderful mother depending on whether you ask krei #(torei do not take your baby onto sparring grounds and yell at recruits with your baby on your back) #(it socializes them weird) #anonymous #asked and answered

[aphrodicted]

Hey could I get a reading? Just wondering about my love life. Am I really ready? I feel like I've done the spiritual work but then set backs happen and I think I'm better off single so I can handle my career, spirituality, whatever else stressful thing I'm working on. Also, what kind of partner will he be? Thank you :) ADF 😊

Hello, ADF! How are you?

About your love life: Eight of Pentacles, Page of Cups, The Emperor, The Magician, The Chariot, King of Wands, Page of Pentacles, The Hermit, The Judgement, Five of Cups.

You are ready, but I feel you don’t finish trusting yourself or your abilities to achieve that love life you want to have. You yourself constantly stop your progress, so I would recommend continuing to work a little more on yourself. If you still feel that it is not the time, then it is not. You will know when and who is the one to start paying more attention to your love life. However, the cards seem to have a message for you beyond telling me whether or not you are ready for a romantic relationship.

My cards talk about a friendship that can turn into something romantic in the future. A young person (adolescent) as a future suitor appears twice in your reading. The cards describe a young, warm-hearted boy you might meet. This person is in your circle of friends. He is a traditional person in terms of love, elegant and charming.

Therefore, my cards ask you to be attentive to your friends, as your next partner could be among them. I don't have much information about him, but I can tell you he is younger than you or is your age. The signs that stand out the most in your reading are water signs (cancer, scorpio and pisces) and fire signs (leo, sagittarius and aries). These could be in the birth chart of your next partner. If you don't know this guy, he will soon appear in your life, although it will take a while for the relationship to progress until it becomes somewhat romantic. Possibly because of the shyness of your next boyfriend, although his decision and desire for you will help a lot so the wait is not too long. However, if you already know this person, you don’t have romantic feelings for him now, but you will have them in the future. I mention the two options, since my cards don’t clarify whether you know him or not, although they do mention towards the end of your reading the entry into your life of an unexpected joy that this person could be.

You are in a privileged position right now. You will soon understand the power you have over your life and how your decisions affect your life. In the end, it is you who can manifest everything you want, so you have to find a way to make it more comfortable and effective for you. Luck is with you and you will be able to undertake whatever you want. Everything will be fine, so you should not worry excessively. However, you must be prudent in making decisions and not do it impulsively. Luck is on your side, but that doesn’t mean you can do things without thinking or taking into account the feelings of others.

The cards also mention a trip you could take in the future, so this trip may be related to your love life. However, I think this trip has more to do with your studies or your work than with your love life, since the cards talk about the need to change your work environment or, if you don't have a job, your place of study.

Your next boyfriend is defined as someone serious, formal and young. In some situations he can be somewhat traditional, although he is charming and willing to listen to the opinion of others. A very sincere boy, although very cautious when making decisions regarding the relationship and his couple because of his shyness (it is difficult for him to express himself and communicate with you) and his desire for your relationship to last over time. He's a guy who can sacrifice things to make your relationship work, so he'll expect the same from you. He will see you as that person he has always dreamed of being, since you meet all the requirements that he was looking for in a partner. For him, you are his dream come true.

Your next partner wants a formal relationship with you from the beginning. And he will do everything possible to win you over and make it clear he wants a lasting relationship with you. If you don't know him, I don't think it will take long for him to start courting you after your first meeting.

However, the cards recommend to you trust more in the people who will appear in your life. I don't know why, but my cards describe you as someone somewhat distrustful of others and that can hinder your relationship. Also, if at any time you feel lost regarding your love life, a good solution is to ask your parents for advice. My cards talk about the "collaboration" between parents and children, so I understand that my cards recommend you to seek advice and shelter from your parents or those people you consider to be your parents. They could give you light on those topics that you don’t know about love or personal relationships.

Finally, you must be more aware that both your achievements and your failures in your love life or in your next love relationship are also your fault. Avoid blaming others and not analyzing where you have made a mistake and what you need to fix so those mistakes don’t happen again in the future.

Good luck, angel!

If my reading resonated, consider leaving some feedback, or tipping me here on Paypal!

#tarot readings #ADF

[anangryally-blog]

I'm very pissed off.

I learned a lot about patience and empathy when I was young.

I remember my mom pulling imaginary patience out of her heart and tossing it to me when she could tell I was low on it. She would toss it across the room and even though it was invisible I could actually feel it working. I’d go from emotional to stable with just a few handfuls. Real, live magic. Of course now I understand it was a placebo effect. This understanding, though disappointing, has given me the confidence to understand my emotions and do my best to control how I react to them. I’m not always good at taking the ‘high road’. I do not always choose to be calm. I argue. I get emotional. Typically I do what most people do - I make a decision and my pride glues me to it no matter how right or wrong it is. The tragedy of being human. But often I struggle to commit to a single belief or side because “what if I’m wrong?” Shouldn’t we all be asking that question? I want so badly to do what’s right but what’s right for me can be wrong for someone else.

At least I know that much.

I’m not sure what to say right now about everything happening in our country. It’s very difficult to remain composed, smart, and thoughtful when you’re simultaneously outraged. I can’t picture my moms handfuls of patience being thrown in my direction and I find it impossible to see the other side. I think I’m right, but what’s right for me might not be right for someone else.

Right?

I’m not so sure anymore. Sometimes there IS a right and a wrong and no grey space in between.

I got labeled a liberal or a democrat or a hippie or whatever else I’ve been told I am because of my focus on people. Had nobody ever thrown those labels at me I’d be hanging out somewhere in the middle. When my dad was a State Representative I’d hear him talk about all the political drama amongst the other reps. He would bring up controversial bills they were going over. Sometimes he’d talk about one and I’d think, “I don’t know what the issue is there, that one seems pretty great.” The republicans are for that one. Oh. “I don’t know what everyone’s whining about with this one, it seems very helpful.” The democrats are for that one. I see.

Sometimes politics obsess over money. Sometimes politics obsess over people. Lately it seems to be obsessing over the need to choose one over the other. This is where my composure gets a bit lost. This is where my label gets put on me. I am a dirty dirty liberal because I choose people. I will always choose people. I sincerely do not understand how I could be wrong here.

I have never been in a position where someone told me I couldn’t do something, until recently when some of my rights became threatened because I am a woman — a rant for another time. Can I get married to the person I love? Yes. Can I go to school? Yes. Can I see a police officer and know he or she will protect me? Pretty confidently. Can I travel the world? Yes. Even despite speaking only one language? Yes.

What would I do if anything in my life was taken from me from a total stranger?

…What would YOU do?

Call me overreactive, but I would be So. Fucking. Angry. If a stranger told me I couldn’t do something that had absolutely nothing to do with his or her life I would want to hurt that person. I would feel violent. Protective. Confused. Misunderstood.

I have the privilege to say, “fuck you, this is my life.” I have the privilege to not NEED to consider these questions. I have the privilege of knowing my family is safe and happy.

I could choose to be silent during times of injustice. I have the privilege of making that choice even though I’m aware that not everyone around me has the same comforts.

But I don’t choose to simmer down.

Because I’m not a piece of shit.

I’m a fucking human and so are you and so are 7 billion others. Seven. Billion. Seven billion adorable, tiny babies have been brought into this world and cried and laughed and grown up.

Not a single one of these 7 billion asked to be here. Not a single one requested to be born into any particular life.

Call me a crazy, illiterate, liberal bitch but my brain cannot grasp how some people think it’s FINE to fuck with another persons life FOR NO REASON.

And don’t give me a single “reason” that has to do with money or a book or petty personal preferences, because if it doesn’t directly affect the roof over your head, the clothes on your back, or the people you love, then it doesn’t fucking matter.

I am sick of being patient, calm, cool, collected, composed, indifferent, and peaceful. I am sick of saying, “Oh woah I’m sorry I forgot to fact check that part of this issue. I didn’t realize it was going to be so detrimental to your livelihood to let a gay man marry the love of his life. I didn’t realize saving boat loads of drowning children from Syria was going to make your house too crowded. It must have escaped me that all your efforts toward helping EVERY kid have a good life is compromised now because so many of them are being aborted. I can’t believe I forgot to think about the effectiveness of a wall while I ignorantly considered putting my tax dollars instead toward free education for all the non-aborted kids. I’m out of line, I’ll go do some more reading.”

Enough of that.

Fuck you guys. Seriously fuck every single person who thinks any of the inhumane things Donald Trump and his supporters are doing is okay. Fuck every single person who has the audacity to say “Liberals want free handouts” as if none of you have ever needed any kind of support EVER in your lives. And if you’ve never needed support then it means you were given hand outs PROBABLY FROM WEALTHY RELATIVES.

I don’t have any patience left because I am educated. Has anyone ever taken a history course? Has anyone ever been taught that history repeats itself? Does nobody care about the parallels between Hitler’s agenda and Trump’s agenda? Has anyone researched psychology? Does anybody know about the Stanford Prison Experiment? Did you comprehend the results and what they told us about human behavior? Have you heard of the phenomenon the “Bystander Effect”?

I don’t have any patience left because I am empathetic and I don’t live in a magical little bubble all by myself. I don’t separate my humanity from the humanity of another human because read those words and recognize how fucking absurd it would be to do that. It’s important to me to occasionally think “what would I ACTUALLY do if I were in their shoes?” Because I am a liberal bitch who is on the right side of history and I’m definitely not going to see a side that promotes oppression and regression.

I don’t have any patience left because I am American and I fucking love what my country was meant to stand for. Remember the statue of liberty? Do you remember where she came from (hint, she is not made in America)? Do you know what she stands for? Remember how we got here? You know how fun it is to go on ancestry.com and find out all the different countries your great great grandparents came from? WE ARE ALL IMMIGRANTS AND REFUGEES. Do you know the difference between the words UNITED and DIVIDED. Guess which one we chose to put in front of our country? UNITED. Remember?

I don’t feel comfortable living my happy life day to day anymore when so many people are affected by the political corruption. Do our politics not reflect our ethics? So many people keep telling me to forget about the politics. Stop worrying, Have hope. Don’t get so mad at the people you love for supporting different things.

I’m not pissed off at people because they are republican. I’m not pissed off at people because they voted for a candidate they thought would give us palpable, necessary change. I’m not pissed off that people are protective of our borders and of our economy. I’m not pissed off that we keep an eye out for terrorists. I’m not pissed off that people don’t want their hard earned money to go to someone else.

I’M PISSED OFF BECAUSE PEOPLE ARE OKAY WITH HURTING OTHER PEOPLE. I’M PISSED OFF BECAUSE PEOPLE ARE PRETENDING SOME OF US ARE SOMEHOW BETTER THAN OTHERS.

I’m not angry about politics. I’m angry about ethics. And I don’t give a fucking shit if we are related by blood or if we have known each other for twenty years or if you volunteer at the animal shelter on the weekends. I don’t want anything to do with anybody at this point who thinks it’s okay that our president is not-so-slowly following in the footsteps of a man who gave us our largest genocide in history. I don’t want anything to do with anybody who thinks it’s okay to prevent me from getting birth control or from stopping an unwanted pregnancy. I don’t want anything to do with anybody who thinks it’s okay that racism is still an enormous issue. Nothing that’s happening right now is okay. And me trying to understand how that escapes so many people is like trying to justify slavery, the holocaust, rape, murder, child abuse, and everything else that we KNOW is wrong. There is no grey area in there. This isn’t a situation where we ponder the different sides. This isn’t about economics or politics.

I don’t support violent protests. But I don’t support silence either. I don’t want terrorists here. But I refuse to label 5 year old Syrian children as terrorists.

I don’t tend to be an extremist in any way except that right now I’m extremely protective of the people around me who don’t have my same privileges for the dumbest fucking reasons in the universe. I am unapologetically at a zero tolerance point right now. I am in FULL ally mode. I will not choose to live my life regularly because I get to. I am going to utilize my position to be here for all the people around me as best I can. I’m not going to stop complaining. I am not going to dramatically move to Canada because I actually want to make America great again, but for real this time and not on Trumps hateful agenda.

This is a terrible time for our country. And if you don’t see that, open your fucking eyes. And if you’re okay with that, remove yourself from my life because we no longer have any reason to be connected. You are supporting a divided frame of mind and the only part of that I support is you dividing yourself from me.

And if you’re scared or pissed off or confused or trying to figure out how to help, I’m here doing the same thing, always available to talk and find solutions.

I might not be able to create any huge difference, but I’m an ally for refugees, minorities, women, LBGTQ, everyone! My eyes are open always when I’m out and about and I am more than ready to stand my ground for both myself and my peers. I stand behind what I believe in and I’m done being patient.

So if you must keep asking when we will accept this presidency or when we will calm down or why I am still up and arms about everything or how on earth I can shut people out for mere politics, understand that to me and many other people in this country (and also the world) this is about ethics. And we won’t go away until it stops.

This will be in history books just like all the other shitty, unethical events our country has dealt with. Which side of history will you choose to be on?

#politics #ethics #opinion #history #right side of history #ally #human rights #7 billion #refugees #fuck Trump #impeach trump #empathy #allies #united #America #rant