#like GOD i would change so many little order things if given the chance

[moonlit-imagines]

Headcanons for being another displaced Padawan with Cal Kestis

Cal Kestis x jedi!reader

warnings: angst, STAR WARS JEDI SURVIVOR SPOILERS

a/n:

prompt:

you and cal went way back

like, jedi padawan back

so after the purge, about five years later, you guys reunited by chance. thanks to cere junda, no less

and, god, seeing someone so familiar after trying to get by on your own, someone who knew the feeling of the trajectory of your life being thrown off before you were ready, that wasn’t easy to come by

“you’re here” -cal

“i’m here” -you

“we survived” -cal

“just barely” -you

cere was delighted that the two of you could have lifted each other’s spirits so much, which was very much needed in desperate times, as you two were just given a very important mission by a former jedi master in your order

you and cal kicked some serious ass together, helping one another relearn old lessons your masters had taught during your youth

“i think running across walls was the hardest thing i was ever taught” -you

“it took me forever to get that right! i could only get two steps in before i plummeted to the floor!” -cal

you shared a lot of stories and emotions during travels, in private

and not all of them were positive, but this was the first chance you’d had in five years to face these emotions, to air out your feelings

“do you miss the clones? i was so fond of our battalion, they were always so kind to me” -you

“i think…i think that was the worst part. the people who defended us in battle, gave me pep talks before training, always there, that same face at every turn suddenly behind the blaster that was meant to put me down” -cal

“i miss them” -you

cal and you had your missions together…and separately. you’d be on one planet and he on the other, trying to race the empire and inquisitors to the holocron

“it could happen all over again” -you

“it could be the key to saving the galaxy” -cal

“or we’d be creating a generational tragedy” -you

“so would the empire” -cal

“you’ve got me there” -you

cal gifting you ponchos from his travels (lol)

“any chance you like pink?” -cal

“well…” -you

braving zeffo alone while you knew cal was somewhere far more dangerous, you had a bad feeling about it

but your teachings from the order were always the same, no attachment. mission first, feelings second…no, last

but on cal’s adventure, he found merrin, a nightsister from dathomir

you hadn’t seen any nightsisters since ventress, which did happen to make you feel a bit off

“cal…you sure?” -you

“trust me, y/n. things have changed. merrin is just like us” -cal

“cal told me much about you. another survivor. a pleasure” -merrin

you and merrin grew quite close actually

she was truly spectacular, and swapping stories with her was sort of educational

“wait…the jedi responsible for the nightsister genocide? you said lightsabers, plural? how many?” -you

“four” -merrin

“two green, two blue?” -you

“precisely. how did you know?” -merrin

“hang on, no way—” -cal

“my master killed him shortly before we were split up…when the clones turned” -you

“grevious? really? master kenobi finally got him?” -cal

“who is this ‘grevious?’” -merrin

“general grevious, he was a separatist general—a cyborg. he wasn’t a jedi, he stole lightsabers from his kills. he ordered the attack on your home” -cal

“i’m so sorry, merrin” -you

you three were still healing from many scars, but doing it together was much more achievable than trying alone

it was a wonder you even made it to fortress inquisitorius

you, cal, cere. all three of you fought like hell to save those kids.

now, cal and you, you two had much different perspectives than say, cere or trilla

displaced padawans. little guidance. cal was barely old enough to even be a padawan learner, but times were desperate and the order called upon the youngling to start quite early. you were in a similar boat. it made you two see eye to eye better than most

trilla, a padawan with much more training and insight, one who was failed by the order that she was most loyal to. failed by her own master.

cere, a devout jedi master who failed many people who were counting on her. who lost herself to a side of herself that every jedi is supposed to fight.

and just before any resolution could come of all of you together, the famed and feared darth vader showed himself

and the sinking feeling you felt before he arrived froze you

“what is it, y/n? y/n?” -cere

*ominous breathing sounds*

you shook off the feeling, fleeing instead

cal and you were split up when you swore vader made a point to hold you back

“run cal! get out of here!” -you

“y/n l/n, i was hoping i would see you” -vader “where is obi-wan?!”

“i thought you were dead” -you

“is that what he told you?” -vader

“you’re going to kill me to get back at him? i haven’t seen him since the purge, anakin! i left!” -you

“there is no anakin!” -vader “did you leave, or did he leave you?”

“are you just going to let cal get away?” -you

“he can’t get far” -vader

“my journey is not important to you” -you

“you are like me, y/n. obi-wan failed us. these inquisitors are weak, impressionable, disposable. but i know how you think. i know how he thinks. i give you the opportunity to join me. fight with me.” -vader

“i saw the holotapes, anakin. i saw what you did to the younglings and i will not let you do it again. we are not alike, obi-wan did not fail me. i took a page out of ahsoka’s book, i found my own path. and it is not beside you.” -you

“this is not over, y/n. i trust you’ll find your way out” -vader, force pushing you off a ledge

you did find you way back out and merrin was quick to save you before going back for cal

you were left completely unharmed, as well, which was quite the surprise to everyone else

“what happened back there, y/n?” -cal

“nothing i’d like to relive” -you

cal nodded and let it go, focusing on the holocron floating before you all

your mind kept replaying memories as they discussed what to do with it

memories of anakin’s massacre. vader’s speech. younglings you couldn’t save. luke and leia somewhere across the galaxy. the inquisitors.

“destroy it.” -you

in one quick swipe, cal took his lightsaber to the glowing blue cube. no questions asked

and from there on, it was no longer about the order. you remembered why you left in the first place. the purge, the politics, your master couldn’t contain himself. your troops turned their blasters on you. everything you were taught was bantha fodder. and you were just a padawan

it was now about disassembling. scaring the people in power while giving the little guy some hope.

“this is a much better gig than obi-wan playing by the rules” -you

“from what you told me, him and anakin never played by the rules” -cal

the name made you shudder, but you pushed past it

“well, anakin was known as the rulebreaker. obi-wan always tried to reel him in. but, i’ve noticed a rule or two that master kenobi had bent” -you

“anakin has a padawan too, right?” -cal

“he did. she was also a rule breaker. when she left the order, i almost followed her. last i heard, she went to mandalore with half of the 501st. i, uh—” -you

“right…” -cal

you were still haunted from the encounter on nurr. still hadn’t told cal and it was eating you up inside.

but the fighting made it feel better

dismantling, stealing, helping

and then merrin left. and cere. and greez settled down. and you and cal were just two makeshift jedi knights with your tragic pasts and your need to keep your place in the galaxy

and keep each other close

but not too close

those rules you followed, the one’s obi-wan followed, you threw them out a long time ago. the jedi order was corrupt. you examined each council master postmortem and decided that they were all flawed despite their rank. you hated them for it.

but decided the one teaching you would follow would be to lose hate, a step to the dark side.

you didn’t really even know at this point, what was the difference between right and wrong anymore

cal and you continued fighting. joined up with saw gerrera. never left each other’s sides

which…sparked feelings you’d never really been taught or told how to deal with

only aversion, really. but it wasn’t like you didn’t really talk about it

“i don’t really see the problem with it. look at everything else we do, that’s not exactly the jedi way” -you

“it’s dangerous” -cal

“love is dangerous?” -you

“attachment is” -cal

“i figured you already had attachments. we were all a crew before this” -you

“i let them all go” -cal

“and you’d let me go?” -you

you began constantly questioning these ways and trying to fight for a new future with cal, without pressing too hard

but it was hard to ignore those feelings and harder to constantly be denied by your old life

and it was harder when the new crew always teased you two

“come on, kestis. if you don’t, i will” -gabs

“yeah, just go for it. who’s it hurting?” -bravo

“i’m just not ready to go there” -cal

you were more bothered than you let on

but you always put the mission first

up until your trip back to coruscant

“this is just a reminder of how little it all matters now. there’s no one left.” -you

“that’s why it matters” -cal

the intensity of this mission made it so it was just the two of you again

and maybe that would spark something…but you doubted it

taglist: @alwaysananglophile // @locke-writes // @sweetheartlizzie07 // @queen-destenie // @captainshazamerica // @ravenmoore14 // @gabile18 // @sweetjedi // @retvenkos // @swanimagines // @randomfandomimagine // @dontyousassmeok // @dindjarinsspouse // @zoeyserpentluck // @summersimmerus // @scarthefangirl // @sheridans-dynamos // @lady-violet // @simsrecs // @xoxobabydolls // @ruvaakke // @simp-legend // @evilcr0ne // @thedarkqueenofavalon // @your-local-simp0 // @elenavampire21 // @pheonixfire777 //

#cal kestis #cal kestis x reader #cal kestis imagine #jfo #sw jfo #star wars survivor #star wars x reader #star wars imagine #star wars #jedi fallen order #jedi fallen order x reader #jedi fallen order imagine

[wispforever]

Some thoughts on Itachi

So, I've seen a lot of comments circulating about my tags on this post, and I'm intrigued at the interest. I didn't expect it, as I see much more pigeonholing of Itachi's character than honest to god analysis. No hate- I'm no stranger to Kishimoto's writing. Some of his characters were unfortunately butchered or never given the chance to be developed properly, and Itachi is most certainly no exception. That said, I like to grant him a bit more nuance than I see on most blogs. I think people get a little wrapped up in the supposed "moral implications" of exploring how Itachi was also a victim of the system, as well as someone who victimized many people. But it's silly to equate character analysis and context consideration with condoning genocide.

I have a good laugh every once and a while at the metaphorical gymnastics people do in order to stay in the good graces of a bunch of internet trolls who are just Waiting for any opportunity to tell you you love murder and think it's delicious just because you made a post exploring a character's background. Media is grey; it's layered and wonderfully complex. There are many wrongs and rights in every story, and many wrongs and rights within those wrongs and rights. That's what I love about Naruto. Often times it's really too much like real life. Instead of people being black and white, right or wrong, bad or good- they're usually in a tough situation, trying their best and falling short, don't have all of the information, acting with good intentions or acting on what they believe will bring about a lesser evil, and then end up hurting others.

But it is much easier to assign blame and move on. A so-called bad person will always be the perfect scapegoat for issues bigger than them. In Itachi's case, the fascist government in the Leaf. It's easier to say Itachi could have just refused and decided not to be involved, than to recognize that like almost every other character in the narrative, he was under extreme duress, living in a military state. He was a child whose existence, along with all the other children and adults in the Leaf, was only valuable as long as he could serve as a tool for the war machine in the shinobi world's fucked up political system. And saying this is not the same as saying he was not capable of better decisions or that everything that he did thereafter or in general should not be read critically or subject to hypothetical consequences. It is the same as a saying his actions cannot be fully understood without complete context, and the themes of Naruto will never come through if every villain is just "evil" with no further nuance. And it would be boring too LOL

That said, I love to think about Itachi's situation back then. The ages in Naruto are a bit muddled, a little inconsistent, subject to change and interpretation, but Itachi was a child when he murdered everyone in the Uchiha compound. Most sources say he was 13. It should go without saying that someone so young isn't capable of the same decision-making or critical thinking as say, a 30-year-old, someone whose brain is finished developing and has much more experience on Earth.

Itachi's experience at this point in his life is informed by his age, and it's obviously informed by his childhood, as he has no other place from which to draw conclusions. Itachi grew up in a warring state. He saw people die and was subject to extreme violence in his formative years. To make matters worse, he was taught that war was inevitable and the only thing he could do to guard against it was kill others before they got the chance to kill him (threaten the village). Thusly, Itachi internalized at a very young age that what was in his power was to minimize damage (to himself, to his village, and to the world). What was not in his power was to stop this violence entirely (by adopting a critical mindset and going against fascist powers).

A part of this I think people often forget is that Itachi has absolutely nowhere to adopt this mindset FROM, as even though his father and the other members of the Uchiha clan seek equity in the Leaf, if they were to overthrow the Hokage and create a new system, it would still presumably center around the same ideals (minus, of course, the oppression of the Uchiha as a group). Fugaku is the head of the Uchiha clan at this time. As someone who imposed near impossible performance-related expectations on both of his sons, and withheld love and affection whenever they came up short (so often that it was at the cost of having any considerable emotional bond with either of them), there is absolutely no good reason to believe that Fugaku would reform the Leaf using a non-fascist ideology. And if he did, there is no good reason to believe that he would be some kind of visionary LMAO

This is important to remember because when it comes down to Itachi's decision to either kill everyone in the Uchiha compound and his family, or be part of the coup that would overthrow the Leaf, some people treat it as though it's a choice between fascism and non-fascism, which it most certainly is not. And if it was, Itachi, as a child who had grown up immersed in this ideology, would not be able to appreciate the difference. This context allows us to understand further what Itachi was really weighing in that moment. Accounting for his young age and limited worldview, the only valuable difference in this moment to Itachi was the amount of bloodshed that he would "allow" to happen. Essentially, he sees the options as follows:

Either give in to Danzo and kill everyone in the Uchiha compound, or facilitate a coup where the current government is (hopefully) overthrown and risk starting another war.

Here, Itachi pauses. He has known war. He knows how it affects children, adults, families, and whole nations. The peace he's living in currently is bought with blood, but it's the only peace he's ever known. The alternative is horrifying. And a war in this context, Itachi likely thinks, would be his fault, as he has now been put in the position to "prevent" it. Danzo and the whole shinobi system have groomed him into thinking so. Itachi, at age 13, cannot understand that there would be no war; it exists only as leverage for Danzo's argument at this point. His sensitivities are being played on.

Fugaku, though he is not the same as Danzo, offers about as much help as he does (that being none). Fugaku has no interest in avoiding war; if a war breaks out, it's justified because it will still mean his clan will no longer be living in oppression. This idea is valid, as fascist systems and discrimination can only cease to exist when we rise up against them; unfortunately, this most often calls for righteous violence, as the oppressive powers will not be moved with peaceful shows (not to mention they are willing to go to extreme lengths to avoid losing their hold on the people they have crushing power over, i.e. the Uchiha massacre). But Fugaku has no words to explain this to Itachi, who fears the worst and further fears being responsible for the worst. All he does is act as if it's a moral failing that his 13-year-old son is unwilling to stage a coup, which he believes could mark the abrupt end of a peace that's only just begun.

That said, let it be known that Itachi does appreciate this situation with SOME nuance, though it isn't of the kind that might have enabled him to see he was being manipulated. He at the very least understands that Danzo is a warmonger and oppresses those he fears (the Uchiha). He understands that the rights of his clan have been sorely disrespected, and that the issue needs correction. He understands the anger of his friends and family. This is why it takes him much deliberation before he can even come close to making a decision. He plays both sides right up until the end, listening to Danzo, as well as Fugaku and Shisui, paying attention to the current atmosphere in the Leaf as he tries to decide.

It is something he doesn't want to do. Here's where I get to the part I put in the tags of my drawing.

In this situation, it's almost worthless to write an analysis about Itachi's feelings at this time, his understanding of what was actually going on, his loyalty to his clan or his loyalty to the Leaf, because really, he could not grasp it. He was never prepared for this. He never knew he would be asked to make a decision he could only understand as "your family or the world?"

Itachi was put in a position that had no happy ending. There was no decision he could make that would not hurt. That could not result in a cataclysm that split him right down the middle. There was no version of this story that a 13-year-old could carry out thinking "I have done the right thing."

And that's the important part. Both sides asked him to make this decision, and so both sides are guilty of placing an immeasurable pressure on a child who should never have been put in such a position. Regardless of ideology, regardless of price, regardless of oppression or loyalty or devotion or any other thing- someone else should have made this decision for Itachi. Someone else should have been responsible. An adult, at the very least. Someone who COULD understand the implications of both options. Someone who COULD go forward and appreciate the evil of fascism and know that a coup was necessary. Itachi was never capable of such a thing. If he made the "wrong" decision, than every child who can't explain to you what a fascist government in a military state looks like and explain what the difference is between a hate crime and resisting a hateful power, is also wrong. Here is the nuance. These are things a 13-year-old in this universe cannot be expected to understand unless they are taught. And Itachi had no teacher. Quite the opposite. There were only forces pressing him from both sides, saying "choose."

Had his father done this for him, had Shisui been in this position, had any other adult Uchiha acting as a spy been put to this task, it would be a much different narrative. But of course, it had to be Itachi, who Danzo knew he could manipulate. It had to be a child, someone skilled enough to do the job, but inexperienced enough, afraid enough, to be willing to sacrifice everything they had to see the mission through. Someone you could whisper "greater good" to and have them hand over their well being on a plate. Someone who didn't understand they had the power and strength to destroy the system threatening them.

On a narrative level, Itachi exists to illustrate this point. How young people are systematically indoctrinated to serve a greater purpose, be it under a specific government, religion, or otherwise. We see it in real life fascism, in real life cults. There's no mistake. It isn't an accident that Itachi's story begins like this.

Which brings me to the rest of his life. The reason I drew the picture in the post referenced at the top. Itachi's character is a bit of a mystery the rest of the anime. Be that because of bad writing or an intentional omission, his motives, thoughts, and opinions are largely left ambiguous. However, there are still a few moments that interest me as far as the implications of his development.

When Itachi first comes back to the Leaf village, he faces Kakashi. On the one hand, this could simply be a narrative tool- the big bad meets the big good. He takes Kakashi out of commission! The first rogue shinobi we see who is able to defeat the pillar of the Leaf, the Copy Ninja, and without even breaking a sweat!

On the other hand, I find the brutality of Itachi's attack very intriguing. Again, it could be the tough guy act, but he's able to keep three jonin busy easily using standard genjutsu (with the help of Kisame). It wouldn't be a stretch to say that using the tsukuyomi is overkill, and at a considerable price, we learn later.

Why then would Itachi, who has been shown to have excellent battle intelligence, who is strategic to a fault, be willing to jeopardize his health among other things just to... scare the Leaf? Make sure Kakashi wouldn't be a nuisance in the future? Sure, the last one would make collecting Naruto less complicated, but they dispatched Kakashi easily enough, and surely Jiraiya, who Naruto was with at the time, would pose a bigger problem than Kakashi.

It doesn't make strategic sense, which makes me wonder if Itachi has a special animosity toward Kakashi. Being his superior in the ANBU before the Uchiha massacre, someone who was willing to conduct surveillance of the Uchiha compound without question, Kakashi could have become a symbol of the indifference of the Leaf for Itachi. He could very well have been a reminder of the inoperable position Itachi was put in when he was still a child, and Kakashi, of course, was an adult. Another adult who did nothing. Noticed nothing. Did not help Itachi.

And while I'm certain that Kakashi would have taken severe issue with the goings on in the Leaf at that time, judging by his reaction when he finds out the truth in Shippuden, Itachi knows him only by what he did then. Facilitated surveillance of the Uchiha compound, was a supportive superior, but nothing greater. A bystander whose compassion, while well meaning, was entirely unhelpful.

I don't think it's far fetched that Itachi fucking crucified Kakashi because he was so angry at what being in the Leaf did to him. At some point, as he got older, he realized how terrible it was. He realized there were people like him. Children who were "born killers". Pawns in the game of the shinobi powers.

After leaving the village, Itachi joins the Akatsuki, who are also seeking peace through war (another story). He is supposed to spy for them, but doesn't follow through in any enthusiastic way (that we're shown). He works alone for quite some time, or else with a group (briefly he was shown with Conan and Kakuzu). He is partners with Orochimaru before he's expelled from the Akatsuki. He is partners with one of the Seven Swordsmen of the Mist. He grows up and meets many people, sees lots of stories unfold. He learns that he isn't in a minority. Many shinobi are just like him.

And then, as an adult, he is partnered with Kisame, who he finds excellent camaraderie with because of their similar backgrounds. We see in this relationship that he understands what happened to him and what he did enough to acknowledge that, while neither of them are monsters, as many people say, they are human. And humans make mistakes. Humans are complicated. Wrong and right and wrong and right. They understand each other, and Itachi understands more clearly what the world puts these children up to. What it forces shinobi to become. That it isn't all his fault, but he still did it. And so he is responsible. He appears to be able to live with that.

But when he returns to the Leaf, those feelings bubble up. He hates the Leaf. He hates that system. He hates what he did. Maybe he even hates being a shinobi, how his excellence was weaponized, how being an Uchiha doomed him and his clan. And for what?

Itachi is played as a character who is only sensible, only logical, only interested in practical things, has nothing to express. But the way he behaves toward Kakashi in that moment bares all his grief and anger. I just like to think about it. We have so few moments where we get to see Itachi genuinely. The fight with Kakashi, the Sasuke/Deidara fight, his thoughtful moments with Kisame. Just makes me wonder what could've been if Itachi's story had gone a little differently.

Anyway, if anyone would like me to expand on any points or has additional thoughts, feel free to hop in my ask box or leave a comment. Thanks for the interest, I love to talk.

#this is wisp #itachi uchiha #analysis

[whumpshaped]

cornered animal

u guys r such a hivemind. i can respect that. i hear u loud and clear

masterlist bingo card

tw vampire whumper, vampire whumpee, lady whumper, conditioning, dehumanisation, begging, sadistic whumper

"Please, leave me be," Helle said shakily, backing away from their sire as she kept advancing on them. "Have I not complied with all of your requests? Have I not been perfect?"

Lady Marie laughed, a soft sound, almost fond. "Oh, perfect is a very strong word to describe what you are. It is true that you have improved in certain areas, and you are getting better at following orders. But perfect? Perfect is a long way off, pet."

"I am trying my best." Desperation was evident in their voice, and in every move they made. Their room wasn't the most spacious, if it could be called a room at all. Their back soon hit the wall, and they realised they had nowhere to run. "Mistress, please, you really have no reason to torment me further. I understand. I do. I, I apologise for my inability to serve you better, but I will improve more, and you shall have a perfect servant in no time. I promise. Please."

"I have been promised many things in life and death alike," she said thoughtfully, coming to a stop outside of arm's reach. Thank god. "Not many of them kept, now that I think about it. And you, pet, are a practised liar; one of your many great talents, one might say."

"I would not dare lie to you, Mistress," they said hastily. "There was a time when I thought I could fool you, and that time is long past. I know my place, now. You– you have made it very clear." They pressed into the wall even more, and they felt a sudden surge of empathy towards the humans they had been hunting for the past decades. They were all but cornered animals in Lady Marie's world, whether alive or undead didn't matter one bit.

"So why do you think I came to visit you, then?"

Helle didn't know. They wished they had, but they were wrecking their head for any little transgressions they might've committed and coming up empty. "I, I honestly do not know, I thought I was doing an adequate job! If I made a mistake, it was out of ignorance, and I can do better if you tell me how. I am eager to do better for you, Mistress, please, give me a chance. One chance without punishment. Please."

"You are not thinking about the right things. Let me give you a hint, pet: you have done nothing wrong recently that would be deserving of a punishment. Now, try again."

Their head was spinning. They were too stressed to be figuring out Lady Marie's motivations, especially given how unpredictable she could be. If they hadn't made a mistake, then why, why was she in their cell? Why did she have that bloodthirsty smile on her face, why did she look at them like they were prey, why did she come at an hour that usually meant cruel whippings and silver pressed against their tongue?

"I do not– do not have the faintest idea, Mistress," they choked out. "I apologise. I have made so many mistakes in the past, punishments are all I can recall."

"Endearing," she teased. "Well, that all changes tonight! Tonight, you will learn a lesson other than atoning for past actions."

"N-no punishment?" they asked hopefully.

"None at all, dear pet." Despite saying that, her thrall soon came into the room, carrying the silver tipped whip that made their breath hitch.

"No, wait, Mistress, please, I have done nothing wrong, you said it yourself! You said there would be no punishment!" Their panic came back in full force, and they grabbed onto their shirt protectively, ready to hiss and bite and claw at her if she tried to take it. They hadn't made a mistake. No whipping was in order.

"And I am no filthy liar. This is not a punishment, pet." She gestured to the floor, and they dropped to their knees like a puppet on a string. They had done this so many times. This was a punishment, this was how punishments started, she was going to torture them, burn them, whip them bloody. "Tonight you shall learn that I expect unconditional devotion. Sacrifices without any rewards in exchange. Your pain without having done me wrong. That way I know you truly are loyal to me."

"I am," they sobbed. "I am, I am loyal, I– that is why I made no mistakes, that is why I am so careful to serve you to the best of my abilities, that is why–"

"That is why you will take whatever I give you." She glanced down at their shirt, and they couldn't, they couldn't bring themself to take it off and subject themself to another night of agony, not without any reason, not when they hadn't even been expecting it. They thought they were okay. "Will you not?"

Their tears felt especially hot against their permanently cold skin, the only warmth they were allowed to feel anymore apart from the fresh blood they were so rarely gifted. They stared at the whip in her hand, trying to will their trembling hands to comply with her orders and failing. "Please..."

"You see, this is why these nights are so crucial in training arrogant little servants like you. All of you think I should be satisfied with your shallow cooperation, your... performance of obedience. But as soon as serving me becomes a touch more difficult, you are all eager to flee." She stepped closer, and their hold on their shirt tightened even more. "Unconditional devotion is so much more than you could even comprehend right now. But you will learn. I am here to make sure of that."

~

taglist: @whumpsday @the-scrapegoat @hidden-dreamland @dismemberment-on-a-tuesday-night @delicateprincepaper @whumppmuhw @florissimps @nicolepascaline @oliversrarebooks @the-cyrulik @pirefyrelight

#at my beck and call #whump #whump writing #helle #lady marie #vampire whumper #vampire whumpee #lady whumper #conditioning #dehumanisation #begging #sadistic whumper

[rickgrimeswifey]

Ok hi! I was thinking of like a carl x reader situation where the reader and carl have had very clear feelings for each other and were together at the prison, but once they got to Alexandria he slowly drifted towards Enid and away from reader (that was so badly explained omg)

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A/n: Ahh oh my god, I really went all in for this one. This one is really sad so just be ready for that.

Category: Angst, angst and angst. Little fluff here and there.

Pairing: Carl Grimes x fem!reader

Season: 3-5

Warnings: Mother passing while giving birth, violence, just a little kiss, cursing, verbal argument

Word count: 3.7k

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She had arrived at the prison with her mother and she was only thirteen. Her mother was pregnant, she guessed that was the reason why the leader here decided to take them in. They were about to send them away when his gaze landed on the quite large baby bump, the guy had a look Y/n had never seen before on his face. It was terrifying but when he saw that her mother was expecting his eyes softened and Y/n could swear she saw him tear up. She later found out it was because Rick's wife had died while giving birth the day before.

The first time she saw him, he was freshly heartbroken. His mind wasn't in the right place. His mother had just died, he needed someone but refused to reach out to anyone. Carl was convinced he could make it out here himself, he was mad at his father for killing Shane, who was like an uncle for Carl. He was a huge part of his life even before the outbreak. Back at the farm Rick had just shot him and now his mother was dead. He was just feeling so many different things at once and didn't know how to cope.

She found him very interesting and wanted to be able to give him comfort that he refused to be given. It was clear that he didn't just let anyone in, or was just some kind of facade he put up? In her eyes he seemed so tough and brave, Carl seemed like he wasn't afraid of anything or anyone. Still he wouldn't have a full conversation with her, he just talked to her when it was necessary or when his father ordered him to. Y/n tried to get him to befriend her and understand him but Carl wouldn’t let her in. She just never found the right time.

She hadn't had the time when they were at war with the governor because Carl was determined to protect and help this place at all cost. She saw when he shot that boy from Woodbury who was surrendering. It would be a lie if she said that it didn't scare her. From that moment on she feared him, not to the point where she couldn't talk to him but enough that she would watch her mouth.

Y/n succeeded with getting on good terms with Carl when the people from Woodbury were getting settled at the prison. The energy around the place changed a lot when they won and offered a place to stay for the remaining people of Woodbury. It wasn't their fault that their leader was sick. Carl also changed, maybe he felt like he could finally relax.

The two of them bonded, exchanging stories about school before the outbreak, telling other stories about trips with their families and secrets. They became close friends who could talk about anything. It was around the time that people started getting sick that Y/n realized she was developing a crush on Carl. Though she didn't have much of a chance to talk with him during this time when people were dying here and there. She was more worried about her mother who was pregnant furthermore was due in three weeks or so.

Everything was going fine until her mother started showing symptoms of the flu, everything in Y/n's mind started spinning. This meant that both her mother and the baby were at high risk of passing away. Hershel was always by her side explaining how this would pass and that her mom would survive this. Y/n had already lost her father a couple months ago, her mom couldn't leave as well. She just couldn't.

He was wrong though, her mom went into early labor while being extremely sick. Almost too tired to push, she gave it all she had. When the newborn human came out of her screaming and crying, the others noticed she wasn't moving anymore. Hershel put his index and middle finger on her wrist where he was supposed to feel her pulse, but nothing from her was heard or felt. Her breathing had stopped and her face was pale. Y/n had been sitting outside all this time listening to her mothers cries of pain as the child was pushed out of her body, how she gathered all the strength she had while being sick and continued on pushing. She had Carl beside her who saw how hard this was for her so he decided to grab her hand hoping to provide some comfort, she looked his way and smiled softly. When Rick came out of there with tears in his eyes she didn't want to believe it.

"I'm sorry..." he said as he tried his best not to cry.

She let go of Carl's hand then slowly stood up and looked into the cell, seeing her mothers dead body on the bed. That image was going to haunt her forever. Y/n didn't even think twice before she turned around and sprinted out of the prison. She got out in a matter of seconds, she ran onto the grass and fell down, too weak to keep going. She screamed out in agony while crying her eyes out, her mother was now gone, forever.

The next week went by slowly, the group wanted her to name the baby. It was a boy, but Y/n didn't want to see him yet. She wasn't ready. That was until Carl came into her cell where she was laying on her bed just like she had been all week. She didn't turn her head to him, she didn't move or do anything. She was just simply too tired.

"I know how you feel," Carl confessed softly. "I promise you it'll get better..."

"No, it won't." She mumbled shortly, before squeezing her eyes shut to avoid the tears starting to flow at the thought of her mother.

"Yes it will, I know it may not feel like it now." Carl said. "You made me feel better, I shut you out when you tried to talk to me because I was feeling just as you are right now. But I promise you it gets easier."

She sat up at his words, so she had succeeded with getting him to let her in early on? Y/n never thought he was listening to her at that time but turns out he was.

"It felt better when I first saw Judith... after I lost my mother." He sighed looking down at his shoes. "Let's go so that you can say hi to your baby brother." Carl reached out his hand for her to grab but she just stared at him. "Please?”.

Y/n took it, she would never make it out of this cell alone anyway. When she walked down the stairs to where the baby was on a table she felt an ache in her heart. It hurt a lot when she saw his face, he looked exactly like their mother. Everyone had always said that Y/n looked more like her father but this little fella was the exact image of their mother.

"He's sweet isn't he?" Beth asked, smiling sweetly at the infant.

"Mhm..." Y/n hummed quietly in agreement, unsure of what to do next.

After a minute of silence from her side she picks him up. Instantly supporting his neck, careful not to hurt his tiny fragile body. Y/n begins bouncing him a little looking into his eyes. She smiles at how he wriggles in her arms and doesn't even notice the tears forming in her eyes.

“Dimitri...” she blurted out.

Beth, Carl, Rick, Hershel and Maggie all looked at her since they were the ones standing around the baby.

“That’s his name?” Rick wondered, with a soft tone careful not to upset Y/n even more.

“Yeah...” she breathed while staring at the tiny man in her arms. “We had this thing about Greek mythology in school, Dimitri means follower of Demeter. And it was believed that Demeter, one of the twelve Olympians, was the goddess of agriculture. Who had the power to control harvest and fertility.” Y/n explained.

The others looked at her in awe and confusion. She had picked it since it was a miracle that the baby had even survived, if he could survive that then maybe he could bring some extra luck to the food growing outside. Considering that they weren’t doing the best at the moment, besides in this world you’d always need extra luck with agriculture and harvest.

“My mom always had many problems with getting pregnant, she always wanted me to have siblings but her and dad had so many problems getting me into this world that they gave up. He’s a miracle, meant to be here. Maybe he’ll bring more luck to the seeds we are planting outside.”

Rick smiled at her, grabbing his belt. “I’m sure he will, Y/n.”  

Over the next weeks she bonded with her baby brother, she wore she would protect him forever and never leave his side since she was the only family related by blood he had left. That lasted until the governor came back and the prison fell. Y/n was placed on the bus where Maggie, Sasha and Bob also were, meanwhile Dimitri was with Tyrese, Mika, Judith, Lizzie and Carol. She freaked out when she realized he wasn’t on the bus, thinking she’d never see him again. Carl, Rick, Daryl, Glenn, Beth and all the others were nowhere to be found either. Hershel was dead, the governor had killed him. That fucking bastard always had to ruin everything. He was dead now though, so he couldn’t hurt them again.

Chaos broke out on the bus, people died, dead people rose and the only ones who got out of there were Y/n, Maggie, Sasha and Bob. They were now left to fend for themselves. Finding food, shelter, water and everything else. Maggie was barely hanging on, not knowing if Glenn or Beth were alive. Bob was trying to see the bright side of things meanwhile Y/n and Sasha were worried for their own sibling. A couple days passed and Maggie and Glenn found each other in a long tunnel. Glenn had found some new people and their names were Tara, Rosita, Eugene and Abraham. Now that they were reunited the group was focused on finding the rest.

The group had found a map where something named ‘terminus’ was supposed to be ahead of them. A sanctuary for all, as it said on the sign. Eventually they arrived, at first it seemed fine then out of nowhere everyone was forced into a type of container that you’d have on boats. Not knowing what was going to happen to them, they just waited and tried to come up with a plan to break out. After a while a miracle happened, the door opened and more people stepped in. Glenn went forward to get a good look.

“Rick?” he asked.

“You’re here.” Rick said relieved.

He tensed up when he got a good look at Tara, sending her a look of confusion and a death glare. Maggie noticed and spoke up.

“They’re our friends, and helped us along the way.” She explained, pointing out the four new faces.

Y/n didn’t hear Daryl and Abrahams chat since she was way too focused on something else, it was him. It was Carl, he was back. She grinned at him and he returned a smile back. She quickly took some steps forward and wrapped her arms around him.

“I thought you were dead.” He whispered in her ear, voice full of relief.

She put her head on his shoulder and sighed, now she just needed to find the rest of the people she loves. The group made up a plan to get the hell out of here and it worked. They left terminus a burning mess. While they were at the other side of the fence watching the tank that had just exploded, burn, admiring their win, Carol stepped out from behind some trees. Her face was full of mud and she was carrying Daryl's crossbow, Rick's revolver and MIchonne's sword that she had found inside. Daryl immediately ran and threw himself into her arms.

After that Carol led the group to a small cabin in the middle of the woods, Carl and Y/n walked hand in hand not wanting to risk getting away from each other again. They were reunited, the best person in the world Y/n knew was with her again. Carol and the rest of the group reached the cabin where Tyrese was found with Judith on one arm and Dimitri on the other.

Y/n let go of Carl's hand and ran to her baby brother. She took him ever so gently from Tyrese, immediately kissing his forehead and holding him securely in her arms. Now she could breathe again, having all of her loved ones at the same spot, knowing they were okay, Well, everyone expect Beth.

The group soon found a priest in the middle of the woods, he’d screamed for help and Carl insisted on helping him. His name was Gabriel and it turned out he had a church filled with food and supplies. The group was happy that they had shelter and celebrated this with a large dinner of plenty of different canned goods. The church echoed with happy laughter and smiles beamed on everyone's faces.

Abraham had revealed that he wanted a group to come with him to Washington where Eugene was going to save the world. When they asked him how he’d always say it was classified. But the group was still willing to help and Tara, Glenn and Maggie agreed to come with them. They would together work as a team to escort Eugene safely.

Everything was going great until the terminus people kidnapped Bob and ate a part of his body, Carol and Daryl went missing. Everything was chaotic. After getting Bob back he revealed that he was bit, this broke Sasha. Soon enough though the group managed to make up a plan to trick the people there. Those people were killed by some members of the group, then Daryl and Carol came back. They knew where Beth was and that’s where the group was headed next. A hospital that was still running in the middle of the city, it was quite an impressive achievement. Anyhow, Beth died, when Y/n, Carl, Maggie, Abraham, Glenn and some other people got to the hospital Rick came out and behind came Daryl with Beth laying dead in his arms. Maggie screamed and cried out, losing her last blood related family. Out of the hospital Noah came, he was a young boy who was a friend of Beth. He was a very kind kid.

Noah talked about this little place he had stayed at with his family when this thing started so the group went to check it out. They wanted to see if it was still up and running. It wasn’t. In that little neighborhood, they lost Tyrese. The group was so tired, everyone was passing and they weren’t getting anywhere. Carl and Y/n hadn’t been talking as much, no one was talking a lot. Everyone was feeling hopeless and frustrated.

They were on the road a long time before Aaron welcomed them to Alexandria. That’s where it happened, from the moment Carl saw her, Y/n knew he wasn’t hers anymore. She tried to talk and hang out with him but his eyes were glued to Enid. He’d probably gotten bored of Y/n, found a new more exciting girl. It hurt a lot, the person she loved the most was treating her as if she never existed. If he could just leave her this easy... did he ever even love her? Ron was in a relationship with Enid but Carl didn’t see that, the only thing he saw was right through it. It had been a week and Carl constantly talked about Enid and how he wanted to get to know her more and how amazing she was every time he was around Y/n. One day she was so fed up she snapped at him;

"You do know she has a boyfriend, right?"

"What?" Carl chuckles out of confusion.

"Enid, you do know she's got a boyfriend?" She asks again, rolling her eyes.

"Who?" He scoffs.

"Ron? He is your friend too, right?” She looked at him with wide eyes, he couldn’t possibly be this blind. “My god, you are such an asshole.” Y/n groaned.

“Me?” Carl scoffed again. “I haven’t done anything?”

“Seriously?” Y/n provoked. “You’ve been a giant douchebag ever since we fucking got here!” She raised her voice at him.

He looked at her like he was lost, mouth agape and eyes filled with confusion. Y/n crossed her arms over her chest that was rising up and down rapidly.

“Why do you even care?” he asked sincerely but you could tell he was getting irritated.

“Because you’re being a dick to Ron” Y/n yelled just earning an eye roll. “He’s your friend and you’re just fucking him over!”

“What do you know about mine and Ron’s relationship?” Carl stepped into her face.

“I know well enough to not be completely oblivious to the fact that he won’t like this when he finds out!” She screamed into his face. “You know what? Go fuck yourself Carl...” Y/n mumbled before going towards the door to his bedroom.

She was about to turn the doorknob but turned to look at him. “It’s so fucking tiring to hear you talk about that chick Enid all the fucking time.” She growled at him through gritted teeth. “Enid is so cool! Enid is amazing! Do you know what me and Enid did today? Enid this, Enid that!” Y/n mimicked him angrily.

Carl crossed his arms and looked at her daringly. “So what? Can’t I talk about people with you now?”

Y/n scoffed at his response, she couldn’t emotionally do this right now.

“Don’t you get it?” She yelled and went towards him, throwing her arms out furiously. “You have been a complete ass to me ever since we got here! Goddammit Carl!”

“What do you have to do with any of this?” Carl barked at her.

“You’ve just been complete ignoring me and thinking about Enid since you first saw her!” Y/n barked back. “I’m your girlfriend and I love you, more than she ever will.” She admitted hearing her voice and heartbreak saying it out loud.

His eyes immediately changed, looking at her with regret and pity. Carl wanted to reach his hand out to her as he saw her tear up. Y/n’s heart painfully twisted in her chest.

“You don’t even love me do you...?” She whispered.

Carl reached his hand out to touch her but she backed away immediately. “Of course I do Y/n.” He said softly.

“No, you don’t...” she cried. “Say it out loud then...” Y/n sniffled.

Carl sighed before breaking his gaze off and looking down onto the floor, putting his hands in his front pockets.

“Oh my god...” her hand shook as he brought it up to cover her mouth. “You don’t love me.”

He didn’t say anything, just stared at the floor, listening to her short sobs.

“Did you ever love me?” Y/n mumbled.

When Carl didn’t answer and just stared down onto the floor ashamed she felt a pit of anger rising in her stomach.

“Say something asshole!” She yelled before she shoved him backwards by his shoulders.

Y/n felt her heart shatter into a million pieces when Carl looked up at her and saw the look on his face. He didn’t love her, by the looks of it he never did. What the fuck was happening... this couldn’t be happening, this was a nightmare and Y/n needed to wake up. She slowly backed to his door and when she felt the door knob in her hand she ran out of there sobbing violently while she ran down the stairs. Michonne caught her in the door wondering what was wrong but Y/n just pushed past her.

“Carl!” Y/n heard her yell as she ran down the streets of Alexandria, until she entered the house where she lived with Glenn and Maggie.

She ran up to her room and slammed the door. Y/n heard footsteps come up the stairs before a knock on her door was heard.

“Y/n...? Everything okay?” Maggie stood outside the door, wondering softly.

“Go away!” Y/n sobbed.

“Honey...” she said with pity. “Please talk to me-”

“No!” She snapped. “I don’t need your pity or your sympathy!”

The few weeks after that Y/n just stayed in the house, not wanting to go outside and face the world. She hadn’t told anyone what was wrong, just shut everyone out. Carl just told Michonne that they had a fight, not what it was about. Therefore when Maggie came into the kitchen one afternoon and asked if Y/n thought it was a good idea if Enid moved in with them, she just looked at her getting incredibly upset again.

“No.” She answered shortly despite the anger growing furiously fast in her.

“What do you mean, no?” Maggie asked, confused.

“I meant no. I don’t want her here.” Y/n just growled at her.

“You know what?” Maggie snapped. “I’m losing my patience with you, you’re gonna tell me right now what the hell happened!”

“Why don’t you ask Carl?”

“He won’t tell anyone, just said you guys had a fight but it was clearly something more than that.” Maggie explained.

Y/n scoffed. “Yeah well he’s good at not telling one things.” She stormed out of the house, knowing if she went to her room Maggie would just have followed her.

She heard Maggie call angrily after her but didn’t care, she hated this place. At least at the moment, she hated everyone and everything. It felt hopeless, like no one understood what she was going through. Y/n walked to the little sitting area in Alexandria where she saw Carl and Enid giggling, kissing and playing around. She felt sick to her stomach and also like her whole world fell apart right in front of her. He never looked that happy with her. What was it she did wrong? What did Enid have that she didn’t?

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#The Walking Dead #twd #twd carl #carl twd #carl grimes #carl grimes one shot #carl grimes angst #carl grimes twd #carl grimes fluff #carl grimes x y/n #carl grimes x reader #carl grimes x you #carl grimes x fem!reader #carl grimes imagine #carl grimes image #carl grimes the walking dead

[thesugarchanotaku]

So i need to get something out of my system and off of my chest real quick. This post will contain heavy spoilers and is basically my take as to why Satoru Gojo is a very tragic character which isn't really shown in the manga so let's go. (Please ignore spelling mistakes I am basically just ranting. Also this is my personal opinion and opinions may differ but that's alrighty)

Seeing the latest leaks made my cry nearly hysterically and I think a lot of people can understand me here. The reason why is more than just Gojos death. Satoru Gojo was a really beloved character of mine. Not my all time fav but I think I valued the impact he had on the people around him.

Gojo despite often being shown as somewhat ignorant or above everybody else is a truly caring person.

- he cared about riko enough to ignore the order he was given to bring her to tengen what ever it would cost. He would have abandoned that damn mission, if she told him that she wanted to stay alive!

- he cares about Suguru Geto so much that my chest hurts every damn time these two are shown

- he looks after his students! And despite his teaching methods being a little extreme sometimes he knows what they can truly take on.

- he cares about is fellow sorcerers like nanami or yaga.

Just to name some examples. And exactly the people from his teenage years were all shown in his "after life" scene. This shows how much the time with them affected him. And even tho Yaga was with him for a longer time, yaga was drawn in his younger years style. Same goes for nanami

Gojo is basically stuck in this TWO year timespan where he got to know Geto, shoko, yaga, nanami, haibara and even riko and her friend. And you know why? Because this was the only time in his life where he could truly be a teenager, a childe, just satoru!

I imagine that his upbringing was pretty cold and structured. Thanks to the fact that former six eyes user were killed you can understand that they tried to protect gojo at all cost but listen! This kid grew up so damn lonely. Then he finally meets other people, gets friends and even finds a person in Suguru that is strong enough to understand him! everything goes south!

Suguru Geto is Gojos save space. He doesn't need to protect Geto all the time, to play his assigned role as "the strongest". If Satoru and Suguru were together he was just a normal teen, not the god damn "chosen one".

The moment Geto breaks away from him his world shrinks back to what it was from the beginning. He tries to find fulfillment in teaching and protecting his students so that they can have a normal life (like he said in jjk0). He doesn't want them to grow strong but lonely because he himself knows how its like.

In the latest chapter he said it himself how strength makes you lonely. And its true because people assume that you can look after yourself. You don't need friends who have your back but him wishing that Geto would have been there to pat his back just kills me. It shows how deep his feeling for geto were and how highly he thought of him as his "best friend". This man was nearly thirty and had maybe two happy years in his life! It breaks my heart.

He was just a teenager when he had to witness a girl he was supposed to protect, being killed, his friend dying, Geto leaving him and him failing at a mission he was not supposed to fail at.

Gojo Satoru is a man with depth that is not always shown, a man that despite the loneliness he felt tried to change the world for his students and a man risking it all just for them. Just for them to have a small chance to be happy. A chance that neither he nor his soulmate Suguru Geto ever head.

Him not being able to achive this goal (as of now, a girl can dream) makes him truly tragic. Him always trying to do the right thing for the people he cared about and in the end still failing makes him tragic.

And him still being lonely despite so many people around him who look up to him and love him makes him tragic.

Satoru Gojo was truly an amazing character. You will be missed and you deserve the world.

I will go back and cry myself to sleep now.

RIP (if this is final)

#jjk spoilers #jujutsu kaisen #gojo satoru #geto suguru #i am crying #jjk 236 #jjk manga spoilers #jjk manga leaks #riko amanai

[thewertsearch]

Asks Comp 13/4

I think he's behind that door. The platform bears his symbol, and it's his final chance to show up in-game.

The best theory I have is that Bilious Slick is the god of Sgrub, and he only appears to a party of Players who have truly proven themselves. Given that Sgrub's endgame involves the creation of a universe, his role probably relates to this in some way.

Maybe he's the one who grants the Players the 'seed' - or whatever else is mechanically required to alchemize a universe.

The thought has occurred to me, too! I've been skimming some old posts while writing asks, and a couple of things have stood out to me.

We still don't know who the pen pal is. I'm still convinced he has something to do with Grandpa Harley, and my best guess is that he's someone who contains Grandpa as an alchemical component.

The session monitor in Skaianet's lab has a new meaning now. Every single one of those sessions could spawn a universe. And it's been implied that every planet with intelligent life will eventually spawn Sburb sessions. If you do the maths, it's clear that each universe should spawn billions of sessions. Just how many 'children' does each universe produce?

Ooh, yes, let's think about the implications of all this on my 'sonas!

If we assume that the kidsona was on comic-canon Earth, then she's in the universe created by the Zodiac trolls. The universe that she and the trollsona could create could be a completely new one!

...that is, if they create a universe at all. There's nothing saying you have to use that grist on a universe, and they might have other plans...

I was actually thinking about Tinkers when I made that post!

I read Worm a couple of years ago. In retrospect, it would also have made pretty good liveblogging material, although probably not quite as good as Homestuck. There's some great stuff in Worm, but a lot of what I really like about it doesn't show up until close to the end.

I initially assumed that the Psychic Double Reacharound was a contingency plan that she'd prepared earlier, since she couldn't possibly have come up with something so elaborate in the heat of the moment, while bleeding out on the ground.

But then I remembered she came up with the Sollux/Mind Honey plan seemingly on the spot, and now I'm not so sure. God damn, Vriska.

This is genuinely super flattering. I hope the inconsistency isn't too much of an issue - and, yes, I note the irony of saying this immediately after a four-month hiatus!

If was clear from early on that things in Homestuck weren't always what they seemed. Hell, sometimes they're not even what we're shown.

We have to assume some of what we're being told is true, or else we wouldn't have a story - but we always have to remember who's telling the story.

[Lol I love this fic. lots of **GIANT** spoilers tho, just because of the nature of the fic. For example, big ones starting at 16, 55 and 57 - C]

Recommended, and does apparently contain spoilers - but this is one I'm particularly looking forward to.

It's kind of a funny question, isn't it?

From Davesprite's perspective, he did change the future - his future. John died, but he 'changed things' - and now John's alive, even though he was dead 'before'.

But if you zoom out a little, you can see that this change was predetermined by the Alpha Timeline, which always depended on these events. Davesprite changed the first-order future - but the meta-future was always set in stone.

The Medium's timeline is so weird, isn't it? Its retroactive existence is difficult to puzzle out.

I don't think you could see the history of your Land by travelling back before you entered. All physical evidence of that history is there, but it's generated in a single instance when you Enter, and can't be accessed. It's analogous to read-only-memory.

After all, John, Rose and Dave are in the past with respect to LOJADE, but they're never going to see its 'history' - and Jade's Entry isn't going to insert it into the Medium retroactively. It won't have been 'there all along' when John was flying around earlier on his jetpack - it'll only ever have been there from Jade's Entry onwards.

As for getting into Earth's past, I think Karkat had it right, when he described the kids' original universe as 'a set of points to choose from'. You can't get into Earth's past by time-travelling around the Medium, but that doesn't really matter, since you can open portals into any point in its history, as long as you have the gear.

They're fascinating questions, aren't they?

Pre-Exile, she was the Tradition Wrangler - a Prospitian lawyer who struggled to interpret the Medium's archaic laws!

DD is a man of action, and I'm sure he approves of any Player who acts decisively themselves.

Plus, I'm sure he can emphasize with Aradia's situation. After all, it sucks to be bossed around by someone whose motivations make no goddamn sense half the time.

Common Terezi W.

True - she didn't need to hold her there for long. The laser pointer thing is a better analogy, blinding her almost instantly. I don't think it's any less fucked-up - it's more like a different flavor of fucked-up.

That's a pretty impressive robotics feat for Equius, actually. I wonder what Aradiabot is actually made of?

Tracing the source of alchemy gear is one of my favorite Homestuck 'minigames'.

Hivebent's art is fantastic! I really see why the comic blew up around this time. It's really coming into its own, stylistically. Of particular note is the art of Make Her Pay, and the art accompanying Aradia's final monologue. I can't wait to see more!

Gamzee is just too high to be rendered in a less symbolic manner.

Sollux is broken, and probably another mutant. The Sgrub trolls don't seem surprised by his level of power - but considering their circle includes other absurd espers like Aradia and Vriska, they probably aren't the best people to ask about what's normal.

Damn, I wish we could have seen more of Alternia. I know some of the spin-offs dig into this, but I hope we get more in canon, too.

Terezi's dream self is blind, because that's the version of herself she identifies most with. There's very little doubt in my mind that your dream self would reflect your self-perception in other ways, too. Skaia is clearly an ally - thank you, king.

You could imagine a Player whose dream self changes after they realize - or conversely, a Player whose dream self cracked their eggy loking thign. I'd be surprised if there weren't many fanfictions where this is a plot point - and depending on how things shake out in the comic itself, I'm not ruling it out.

In asking about magic, Kanaya really does start to sound like the young child that she is. It's easy to forget, but heartbreaking when you remember.

A few people have talked about this, so I added all of my 'immediate reaction' posts to the liveblog tag! I think it got them all - other than LOLCAT, which I missed and will add now - but if there are others, let me know!

I guess Matespritship isn't explicitly described in terms of romantic love. It's described as a close analogue of human romance, which is 'rooted in strongly positive emotions'. I've been assuming, based on that, that Red Romance is effectively interchangeable with the human concept of romantic love - but I suppose that's not necessarily the case.

I do think you're hitting on a very good point, here, too, which is that the quadrant system itself is described as something that trolls need. I think the 'need' for these categories is enforced, artificially, for the benefit of the Empire. It wouldn't be the first institution to pull something like this.

Either way, it'll be interesting to see how the troll/human ships end up shaking out. It's going to be a challenge to merge their respective relationship frameworks. The best solution, of course, is for them to experience their own relationships without any cultural baggage, but I don't think I'm just speaking for myself when I say that that's easier said than done!

#asks #full liveblog #act 5

[tathrin]

✏ 🐺 ⚠ 📚 please! :D

Answers for this LotR ask-game.

✏ rewrites: here's a pencil, which ONE thing in the novels/films are you changing?

Oh gods, just one? Ughhh that's hard. Okay, even stretching the definition of "one thing" to the utmost limit to be an entire character subplot...I'm still torn between Give Arwen An Actual Coherent Plotline (which I think would do the best thing to fix for the movies) and Show Legolas And Gimli's Friendship Arc (because that's at least something that just gets largely overlooked-and-glossed-over with the occasional flicker of lip-service paid to it at random rather than being an absolute cluster-fuck of incoherent half-assed thoughts that stumble all over themselves without any actual fucking resolution/explanation like the Arwen Stuff). Much as I would personally like to see the latter, I think if I were actually given the chance to change one thing, then it would be the Arwen Situation just because that's such a fucking MESS and it really needs fixed.

If we're going with literally just one single thing, then: Denethor burns to death on the pyre instead of running like three fucking miles to the end of the city what the fuck.

🐺 GROND GROND GROND: which of the battles is your favourite to watch? is there a combat scene in particular that you enjoy?

The Battle of Helm's Deep. As much as it bothers me that the elves are there without any plausible explanation, and especially that they just fucking disappear from the entire plot as soon as it's over, it also looks so damn good to watch! And my irritation is mitigated by the GRIN that I absolutely cannot stop from breaking out over my features every single time I hear "that is no orc-horn!" and see the look on Théoden's face when Haldir walks in (and the smug little grin on Legolas's face too because let's face it, he doesn't get to be a little shit in the movies the way he is in the books and that is a crime) as well as by the absolute fucking BEAUTY of that battle itself, not least of all the heart-wrenching scene where Haldir dies. THAT MUSIC OH MY FUCKING GODS AM I RIGHT!? Gods, even when you're watching it as critically as possible and picking-out the bits where cause/effect break-down and narrative order was shuffled in ways that don't make logistical sense and picking up on the minute little errors and inconsistencies...it's still so damn fucking good.

(btw I know I cannot be the only one who noticed, but since it seems that many of the little details that the early movie-fandom used to talk over obsessively in the 2000s have fallen out of common knowledge in more recent years...who else desperately wants to see the footage of the cut where it's Legolas who hauls Gimli out of the water after the wall is breached, rather than Aragorn? Because it's Legolas's hand that actually pulls him up, but then the footage cuts to Aragorn helping Gimli away...but it was Legolas whose hand pulls him out of the water, Legolas who yeeted himself down the stairs on an orc-shield to get to Gimli, so why don't we get to see the rest of that!?)

PJ, the Extended Editions are godsends don't get me wrong...but could we have ALL the deleted footage sometime? Pretty pretty please with elevensies on top?

⚠ fucking buckleberry ferry: from the clip of Dom and Billy discussing the one swear word they could theoretically get by censors, which line would you change?

I honestly don't know, because I don't know that that would actually do anything to add to the weight of things? But a very soft, "oh fuck" when Théoden sees the Nazgûl flying towards him, perhaps!

📚 boxset: how were you first introduced to Middle Earth?

My little brother actually read them first, and he made me read them. I think I was in eighth grade? Give or take a year or two.

Our mom had a collection of "classic novels" that she'd gotten from some kind of book-club some years back, so we had copies of all four books on the "fancy shelves" in the living room next to all the "real literature" and boring biographies and stuff, so I read nice pretty leatherbound editions first, with lovely maps and illustrations, and I think that added to the "weight" of the story in a way, because none of my other fantasy/sci-fi books ever merited such treatment so it made them feel special.

But it also made me leery of reading them tbh, because I'd spent my whole youth being told that the books I liked were crappy books that just Could Not Compare to the Worthwhile Literature that real readers liked (and which were, imo, usually shit). So I'd actually ignored LotR my whole life because it was on the Fancy Book Shelf so I assumed they were also crap. But my brother insisted that I suck-it-up and read them anyway, and that I had to read all of them and not just The Hobbit and call it a day (he knows what a stubborn, contrary person I am, and that it was A: going to take several thousand words for me to give them a fair chance and also B: the Hobbit alone wasn't going to blow me away) and I was reluctant, but he persisted and I did and oh boy was he right. Then like one or two years later, we found out they were making movies so of course we had to re-read them so we'd be ready and I think we both read them at least a dozen times between then and the release of Fellowship, to the point where mom eventually bought us each our own paperback copies so keep us from pestering each other lmao.

(The Silm took a while. I had to literally trap myself on a train freshman year of college with nothing else to do in order to get through that one the first time shhhh.)

#lotr movies #middle earth asks #lord of the rings #me #arwen #legolas #gimli

[lyntergalactic]

lyn reads triple zero - finale

by which i mean i finished it last night and i have Thoughts

first off, it was a decently enjoyable book when i managed to turn off my brain. solid 3 stars. there's a lot of good here that i actually really liked, it's just... unfortunately balanced out by a lot of bad that made me want to throw my phone across the room.

so here we go. thoughts, in no particular order:

1.) i genuinely love the characters. even ones like kal who i hate as much as i love. i can see why people who don't do more than a surface reading like him. personally, i love how crunchy a character he is and how all his many flaws make him this unintentionally complex character. i just want to pick his brain apart.

i could ramble on about everyone but it's a lot of "these feelings i already had about these characters have been reinforced like crazy" which basically means i'm fascinated by all of them, want to get all of them therapy, and also want to write all the fic where they get to have healthier relationships lol

2.) there's a lot of yelling in tcw side of fandom about how the clones should get chances to act like the dumb college age kids they are, and they get to in this book!! i think some of my favorite moments were when the boys were egging each other on and giving each other shit. especially that fi and sev bit with the ladder, at least until sev hurts himself. like how fucking dumb is that but also how fucking typical of 20-ish year olds?

3.) fi is gay. fi is so gaaaaay. there are so many little points in his narration where it's like "ah, yes. he is absolutely attracted to [X] person" but beyond that, his whole little subplot about feeling like something in his life is missing? wanting a normal life and a girlfriend, etc? it's juxtaposed against etain and darman so much that it comes across like fi is in love with darman and just doesn't realize.

yes, i have a new ship. yes, i'm going to write horribly angsty fic for it. why do you ask?

4.) etain and darman are cute when KT isn't pushing her weird ass heteronormative agenda. though my aroace ass literally yelled at my phone "YOU'VE KNOWN HIM FOR A CUMULATIVE WEEK AND CHANGE, YOU DON'T LOVE HIM YET" when they had their first lil heart to heart and slept together that first time. but, again, they're young 20-somethings who might die at any time, i can forgive them that.

shit, i can even forgive etain's whole pregnancy thing--to a point--because she's a dumb kid who is going through a crisis of faith. (more on that specifically in a sec) but jfc kal's reaction to it all was--idefk. he's absolutely right to be furious with etain. what she did was stupid in the first place, not well thought through, and she's putting a hell of a lot at risk by going through with it.

but everything else about his reaction was just--dude. what the actual fuck. and 60% of that is his clinging to his bizarre conservative mando ideals while 40% is his utter disdain for the jedi and i just--UUUUGH.

5.) every time the jedi came up in narration. every. fucking. time. i wanted to scream. i know KT has terrible opinions on them. i've read most of the other books!! but oh my god it was especially bad.

do i think it would be interesting for etain and bardan to have crises of faith because of the war? absolutely. in fact, it even makes sense that they would!! but the way KT goes about it is just fucking baffling.

which is really highlighted by that one conversation etain has with ordo where he says "nah, you've got a worse life than i do because i was adopted but you were given away to strangers by your parents" and i'm just

THE FUCK DO YOU THINK HAPPENS TO NON-JEDI KIDS WHEN THEY GET ADOPTED, ORDO???? THEY'RE GIVEN AWAY TO STRANGERS BY THEIR PARENT(S).

there is just. so much. so much about the jedi that's so wrong and that if it was written rightly should've fucking changed entire character interactions and plot and it infuriates me.

6.) everything about the mission is just. plot holes all over. if i take it at surface value and treat it like a bad action movie that's just here for entertainment i'm fine, but the second i stop to actually think about how this whole mission is happening i'm just--that's not how this works. that's not how any of this works. how are you all not dead???

but, you know. whatever. i can deal with it. there were highly entertaining moments. i literally cackled out loud when fi told kal that he and sev planted explosives in the one dude's car and kal was like "... the car i was in?? FI." and i'm real intrigued by bardan as like... the commandos' Q figure. it's highly entertaining.

7.) i have A Lot of Opinions about the weird ass brand of masculinity KT's characters subscribe to. but one thing i appreciate is that her male characters cry and aren't thought of as less for it. it's one bastion of good in a sea of blegh.

8.) i mostly stopped capping bits as i got sucked in but i did nab this bit which made me laugh and is a good bit to end on. (i forgot what my other points were gonna be; work distracted me lkajsdf)

fi as a musical fan is my new favorite headcanon. i don't care if grease doesn't actually exist in the gffa.

also i need a crossover with mass effect where he and garrus exchange sniping playlists.

#lyn reads repcomm

[soulsxng]

Sort of a continuation of these two worldbuilding posts from a little while ago:

One thing I didn't go into very much on either of them, was that there's one sort of subsection to the first type-- the "bound" gods, so to speak. As such, this subset of deities is effected by the same symptoms as those gods that are tied specifically to one realm.

These are the ascended deities.

Ascended deities are those who were not born as a god. Though they can be born as any species really, there are a few that are given the opportunity more often than others. Examples of this being kistune, Sumydans, and some types of elementals, to name a few!

Anyway, these gods became what they are today by passing a series of trials, and ultimately gaining something called a God Seal from it.

The trials differ depending on the individual, their species, and the kind of god they intend to become, but many of them involve proving their strength, wisdom/cunning, resilience, character, etc. They also usually require the individual to decide what their purpose will be as a god, and-- in order to form their God Seal-- choose some part of themselves to give up.

Darrow, for example, gave up his ability to change shape-- something that is fairly iconic for a kitsune and Inari-- and allowed that to make up the form of his God Seal. Unless he decides to let go of being a god, or the power is temporarily granted to him by another being, he'll never be able to use it again.

Now for the God Seal itself. What it looks like depends on the individual, but it is almost always kept on the deity that owns it, or hidden somewhere that they frequent. If this seal is stolen, not only does it give the holder of the seal power over the god it belongs to, but if it's kept far enough away from said god for long enough, it'll disperse. Thus causing the god to return to what they were before becoming a deity.

The time and distance is determined by what the deity gave up to form the God Seal in the first place. Again, using Darrow as an example, he can be within about 1500 miles of his God Seal and not have the time limit come into play. If he's outside of that 1500 miles, he would have about 5 days to retrieve his seal before he lost his powers and returned to being a kitsune.

If the God Seal was destroyed, it would almost always result in the deity that owns it dying. There's a small chance that it may leave them severely wounded, and likely disabled to some degree instead, though that's pretty unlikely. In this case, they would lose their powers and godhood, as well as whatever they used to create the seal in the first place. They would never be able to ascend again after that, either.

Moving on to tying themselves to a realm. With ascended deities, there's a bit more of a competitive aspect to things. After all, sometimes a being becomes a god, and there's already another overseeing the same/similar domain in the realm/area they're from. And a lot of gods really don't care to share their space or followers with others more than they have to.

Because of this, ascended gods will sometimes invade the realms and territories of other ascended. Usually a challenge is issued before any actual fighting (or whatever else) begins, but not always. Either way, the goal is always the same-- to obtain the opposing deity's God Seal.

There was a time that these challenges were extremely cutthroat, and a lot of the stolen seals would never be returned. Or worse, would be destroyed. Now, however, there's more of a system in place that prevents a lot of unnecessary cruelty and bloodshed. If ever there's an ascended god that becomes known for destroying, or not returning seals after a challenge, they're usually quickly targeted or closely watched by the other ascended gods.

When an ascended god is kicked out of their domain, they have the slightly longer amount of time to find a new one than they would have to retrieve or get within range of their God Seal. Without a ream, the seal means little to nothing, essentially.

#[Worldbuilding] #(Forgot I hadn't really mentioned the ascended gods before! #I was looking for a post I thought I'd made about them before #because I mentioned God Seals in Eleare's little write up #but I couldn't find it! #and realized that I didn't actually write it like I thought I had #So here's this with a whole rundown on a few different things concerning them)

[ramblingkat]

Ghosts of Future Change

Look, more AU_gust. How do I get Solo Leveling/ORV/Leveling with the Gods theme fic from Artist’s Muse? No idea, but you get to enjoy it now. 

Fandom: Bleach

Characters: Kurosaki Ichigo/Urahara Kisuke, Unohana Retsu

Prompts: Pandemics and Epidemics, Artist’s Muse

Summary:  The world changed when portals to other dimensions opened. More than monsters came through. Sickness and change did as well.

Ghosts of Future Change

Ichigo’s back itched. Badly. He was only vaguely aware of what was going on around him, his brain feeling sluggish. Being sick sucked, even more given that he knew he was only part way through the illness. Right now, he was in the middle of a round of Changing Plague. What was going to come next was worse. But he sort of expected to be hit by it eventually. All Talents seemed to be catching it eventually. But he knew the worst was to come. The Changing Plague was called that for the mutations it brought to those who caught it. 

Honestly, it was a surprise it took this long for some sort of illness to come through one of the portals.

The world had changed when portals to another dimension had opened up, like so many different stories he had read while working on keeping his Korean up. Web novels had been a good way to help Ichigo keep what he had learned fresh and in his brain. 

It had been a little eerie how accurate some of those had been. Portals opened to dungeons and other realms, some that burst out swarm after swarm of monsters that needed to be wiped out. Kisuke had been fascinated, after they had made sure all their important people were alive. Ichigo had expected Kisuke’s mad science brain to explode with delight. When he had first met his cousin Yoruichi’s best friend, Kisuke had been in a collection of hard science classes and doing his best to break reality then. Having something else beat him to it just seemed to challenge the blond. 

Ichigo had fallen head over heels for Kisuke when Yoruichi had introduced the pair of them when Ichigo had needed a photo shoot model for an art class. He had been lucky that the blond had felt the same way. So they were together already when the first dungeons appeared, and they had both developed Talents that made fighting in said dungeons a surprisingly fun and profitable endeavor. Besides being excellent at fighting, getting into these alternative realms had given them both an outlet that they both enjoyed. 

Kisuke had invented whole new devices to take measurements, including a few that several governments had bought in order to rate and organize their dungeons. So the pair of them never had to work again, but they both still did a lot of exploration. 

Ichigo had never thought he’d get the chance to do such a thing in his life. He had expected to keep up his language studies, be a translator, and live in Tokyo his entire life. Maybe taking vacations around the world and taking amazing photos with the cameras Kisuke got him. 

Then the dungeons had appeared, and Ichigo had gotten the chance to explore places no human had ever seen before, taking videos and bringing them back. Another thing that Kisuke had created for him, drones that followed them and took videos. Ichigo would take that and set to work on what he wanted to release. He never hid danger, but there was a strange beauty to the dungeons. Especially when he got images of Kisuke or himself in combat. 

All in all, the dungeons only seemed to make Ichigo’s life better. 

Then the Changing Plague came. 

Those who had developed Talents were affected first, but it spread to those who never even developed a spark of magic. One out of ever five Talents developed a high fever, most falling unconscious for a period. They’d wake up, sluggish but aware. Then they’d collapse again, a second fever raging through their system. Depending on how strong they were, they would make up with some sort of physical changes. Mostly some sort of animal aspect, though not always a natural one. There were quite a few who developed something mythical. The stronger one was, the more likely they were to become something from stories.

Or dungeons. 

Ichigo was now in that period between fevers. He was still sluggish, and he wanted to scratch all over his body, but the young man resisted the urge. There was the sound of something odd in his room, and he forced his eyes open. Was still dragging from the first round of the fever, and he dreaded what was going to happen next. But he didn’t recognize the sound and that made him paranoid.

Opening his eyes, he realized that the noise was the sound of scales sliding against the wood flooring of the bedroom he shared with his partner. Blinking, it took a moment for him to realize it was Lady Unohana, a former teacher for Kisuke and one of the greatest healing Talents to have been discovered. He had heard that she had recovered from the Changing Plague, but he had not realized just how much the woman had changed. Yoruichi, the only person he knew personally so far who had been sick and recovered, had developed feline aspects, but nothing close to the level of Unohana’s change.

She looked human from the waist up, but then her body flowed into the great body of a serpent. Some sort of constrictor, Ichigo was pretty sure, given how thick the body was, but his eyes drifted back up to meet Unohana’s as the woman leaned over him. 

“Good morning, Kurosaki-san,” she said calmly, moving to help him sit up a bit. “I see that you have rejoined us. I have some things for you to drink.” She held the first cup to his lips. “You’ve been sweating, and I’d like to rehydrate you in a more natural method.”

Drinking what the woman gave him, Ichigo let his eyes roam around the room. Once she pulled the cup away, he asked. “Where’s Kisuke at?”

Unohana gave a soft hum as she collected a second cup. “He’s currently sleeping in another room. He’s come down ill as well.”

“Fuck,” Ichigo muttered, pretending not to see the slightly disapproving look from Unohana. She was scary enough without looking disappointed with him. “I had hoped….”

“Hope is fine,” she told him. “As long as you accept reality. Now, how do you feel?”

“Sore,” Ichigo said. “Itchy.” Then he yawned, blinking sleepidly at the woman. She just made sure that he drank the second cup of what seemed to be broth. “How is he?”

“Feverish. He’s about a day behind you in regards to the illness,” Unohana said briskly. “Shihoin-san is watching over him. Thankfully she’s already recovered herself. Watching the pair of you is not something I can do.”

Honestly, Ichigo was surprised to see her here at all. As the top healer of Japan, she was in high demand. But she had pretty much raised Kisuke, so Ichigo could understand while she at least stopped by for a visit. But he found himself relaxing as he knew that Yoruichi was watching over Kisuke. 

“One more cup,” Unohana ordered, and Ichigo managed to swallow that down as well. Now feeling rather full, he let himself sink down as Unohana pushed at his shoulders, pulling the blankets back over him. 

“Rest, Kurosaki-san. You’ll need that energy.”

Eyes feeling heavy, Ichigo didn’t fight with her, letting himself drift off yet again.

***

Ichigo grinned as he was looking at the video the drones had gotten from the newest dungeon. Watching himself and Kisuke run through and take down monsters was always enjoyable. Plus, well, Ichigo just liked seeing Kisuke fight. The man was sex on legs when he was killing things.

Even when those legs ended with a pair of delicate cloven hooves. Not that Ichigo could say much, given his own feet were scaled and clawed now. Waking up with dragon bits along his body had been a shock, but Ichigo had rolled with it. At least he and Kisuke had the scaling along their backs in common, though where Ichigo’s were golden in shade, Kisuke’s ranged from crimson to black. They even shared new head pieces in common. Ichigo’s were more horns, protruding forward from his head, where Kisuke’s seemed more like antlers curling back over his head. 

Also learning how to deal with tails was new. Yoruichi was going to cash in on the favor of finding them new pants sooner rather than later, Ichigo was sure of it. 

But he was busy putting together some new photos to post from the latest dungeon run. He found images where they were in very similar poses, both pre and post sickness. Then, after changing the opacity of the new images, he layered them over the old. So the new looks were ghosts of horns and tails over the old images, the hint of wings on Ichigo’s back. A view of the future to come.

Smiling, because doing any photo editing with Kisuke as the subject always made Ichigo smile, Ichigo set it up to post.

Maybe he should go see if Kisuke was up for another proper photo shoot. Ichigo loved the look of the scales down his partner’s spine, and definitely wanted to make other people jealous that he got to lick them and they didn’t. 

#hurt/comfort bingo #au_gust 2022 #Bleach #Kurosaki Ichigo #Urahara Kisuke #Unohana Retsu

[tamerajedwards]

I am really really enjoying being a grandma. 💕 I really goofed up being a Mom. I was a young divorced Mom at age 27 raising two little girls ages 3 and 5 all alone until they were grown. Their Dad had them on weekends and Wednesday. I was working two and three jobs without a college education, gone all the time and my parents stepped in and helped me raise them. I felt so bad, so guilty, and like a huge failure. I was out searching for love, instead of being a super Mom. I failed at being at their softball games and other activities because I was trying to rebuild my life. I was blind to what was really important in life. I wonder if my children will ever forgive me for my shortcomings. But I have been redeemed by my Heavenly Father. Praise God! He has thrown my sins into the sea 🌊 of forgiveness and they are no more. Now I must forgive myself and let go. I did what I could at the time. Life was extremely difficult for me and for them. Oh how I wish I could go back in time and change so many things but I can’t. Time marches on and waits for no one. The beautiful thing about that is that we can learn from our mistakes. Life is one big classroom. We learn every day until our graduation day as we exit earth to enter heaven.

I have a daughter that reminds me that I let her down years ago when I continually failed to buy her scholastic books when the order paper came home. I didn’t even make it to book fairs where children absolutely love to buy books and other fun trinkets. I actually LOVE ❤️ to shop in there too! I’ve always loved buying books. Yesterday as I was able to be my granddaughters third grade teacher for the day I gave her 30.00 to spend at the school book fair. At first she would not accept my money. I thought “ahh you’re being stubborn like you’re mother!” Then I asked her why and she said she wouldn’t take the money unless her brother was able to get some too. I said, “Of course I’m going to give him the same amount of money to spend.” I showed her two ziplock bags with their names on them and the money for books. I plan on giving my other grandkids that go to a different school the same amount. It made me cry, because I desperately needed them to take the gifts from me. You see giving is such a gift in life! It’s so important to not reject and take away from the blessing when someone wants to give to you. I actually love to give more than receive. It blesses my heart. Lately I’ve been sending money to people with cancer. Usually ones that are young parents with kids and the families are struggling with losing one parent.

So I’ve come full circle. God had given me a chance to be the greatest grandmother I can be. By giving them my time and love 💕. He even gave me the finances to spend on them. Believe me, I have to pray that in because there are 9 of them. Ha! God is amazing! Oh what freedom we have to be forgiven! What a beautiful thing to be redeemed. Second chances are beautiful. He has cleared my pathway and sharpened my vision. Getting older isn’t so bad after all. There is beauty in wisdom. I love 💕 you all. Blessings Xo T

[rouladimsstuff]

Goodness vs Evil.

Although I don't like writing the last word and with a capital, I have to... Anyway.

I believe it's not about religion as if I can say Jesus vs Satan or is it? Hm... I'll change right away my mind, and I'll stay on this thought firmly and steady.

I'll tell you a little story to make you understand.

Long ago, there was an old lady who was uneducated but she was very very kind. She went to the church to lit a candle, to give honor for Saint Marina. (The living of Saint Marina says that she beat the devil).

And the poor old lady felt pity and mercy for the evil spirit and lit a candle for him too. And she prayed to God to forgive him.

Late at night, she went to sleep and saw in her dream, the Satan himself, threatening her that he'll harm her badly and in an arrogant and selfish attitude he told her that "Jesus should bound on me and I should forgive him".

The poor woman as you can understand, woke up in tears and fear and promised to herself that she would never ever do such thing again.

I could tell you more stories, but not now, perhaps another time.

So, what is the conclusion of the story? That we should be very careful, that people who have arrogant style and selfish attitude must be avoided and I'll go deeper.

If we're calm we can give solutions to our problems and if we are angry we create even more problems than we already have.

Any kind of attitude that makes our soul feeling stressed and angry, it's from evil spirits.

And any kind of attitude that has inside understanding, comfort, patience it's from the angel spirits.

I understand that it's not easy to put in a box our bad side, but if we think that all kind of emotions that upset our heart are from Satan and his followers, there's always a solution. A prayer can help a lot, plus Jesus said that His path is narrow and if we want we can follow him.

He has given us many elements to see, watch and learn in order to help us but it's up to us what side we'll choose.

Light or darkness?

Perhaps you'll think that darkness is stronger and able to endure. You are right.

Do you want prove about it? The answer is simple. We can light the darkness but we can't darken the light, that's, why it's more powerful.

The good behavior, deeds, the kindness always win. A bad and selfish behavior is avoided.

So let's try to be better and put in a box the one who the only one thing that he wants is to terminate us. Because if he had the chance, he'd transform earth to hell.

Darkness, dirt, dust and desperate shouts who still call for help since once, by accident, lost souls's screams have been heard...

So, stay alert and try to see things in a different way... In God's way.

[the-faultofdaedalus]

i have not seen the loki trailer and don’t know shit abt it aside from “involves time-travel?” and the wishlist is either a) K A M A L A (i think loki causing problems on purpose at a high school is very fun and also KAMALA) or b) agent carter cast cameo and jarvis gets to hit loki in the head with a cricket bat like in that one ragnorok comic

#litterally favorite loki moment in comics. period. #also its just so good in general bc pepper is just like. ok. fuck this fuck you i WILL be canceling the apocolypse single-handedly today #and i love Her #i do fuckin entirely forget the name of that comic tho so rip. #god i just love kamala so much. so much. #unpopular opinion but what if CW had been like. CW 2 (bring in the inhumans from aos bring in carol bring in kamala) #set up SO much shit and also!!!! kamala!!! #also HEY THEY COULD ABSOLUTELY DO LOKI IN THE MS MARVEL TV SHOW #OR VICE VERSA #god please. please. #ESPECIALLY IF THEY'RE DOING TIME-TRAVEL SHIT #BC OF HOW KAMALA WORKS #MMMMMMMM #man sometimes i feel like im WAY too big-brain for marvel #like GOD i would change so many little order things if given the chance #also just. j a n e t #SHE DESERVED TO BE IN PHASE ONE YOU CANNOT CHANGE MY MIND #JANET VAN DYNE QUEEN BEE OF MY HEART LIGHT OF MY LIFE FOUNDING AVENGER #she deserved better than to show up soely in flashbacks and EXTREMELY briefly in amatw #also i am still mad that they just swapped tony and hank's villans. like why. #like on SOME level i get ultron as tony's just bc like. hes the ai guy but also ultron as he ended up isn't. that. #and the ghost thing as like. quantum bullshit. whatever. #but like!!!! og comics ghost is tony's villan! hank made ultron! fuckin why would you change that! #MARVEL YOU INTRODUCED ROXXON IN AGENT CARTER AND THEN DID NOTHING WITH IT #WHY COULD YOU NOT HAVE DONE SHIT W/ GHOST THERE #i think main mcu should take more shit from the tv shows tbh #i just. i just want someone to acknowledge that aos exists. at least once.

[riceybaby]

all about you #2 🤍 - the proposition

synopsis: a meeting with your manager leaves you with lots to think about, and lots to do.

Exactly one week. One week until the album you’ve poured your heart out into gets released, one week until your pain is no longer yours, but the worlds to interpret and shape into their own cathartic healing. You had learned pretty quickly after the first album that release week is pure mania, from signings to interviews to performances, you don’t get a chance to rest. And that is why nights like these, just you and the girls, are your absolute favourite. Away from the flashes of the cameras and the prying eyes of the fans, you just get to be yourself, talking about things any ordinary girls in their early twenties would.

“No it’s no fun when they do it like that,” Rory says, “missionary’s boring, doggy is where it’s at. He can pull on your hair then, otherwise he’s just pulling you at some random angle.”

“Yeah but Ror not everyone wants to be railed into oblivion with every kink under the sun, some of us are vanilla”

“You, Lottie? Vanilla? From what I could hear of you and Reece last night that was not vanilla.”

“Oh god no that wasn’t but I’m just saying it’s nice to be vanilla sometimes, I don’t need to be suspended to the ceiling while getting spanked with a fucking cucumber or something to enjoy it every time.”

“Who the fuck is spanking you with a cucumber”

The girls continue their conversation as you answer your phone, having heard it chime a few seconds ago. You look down to see a text from your manager.

“Greg wants to see me tomorrow”

“What about?” Lia says, stretching over to change the tv channel.

“Not a clue, normally he’d say?”

“He’s probably given you another interview, miss ‘breakout star’, front and centre”

“Oh shush, I’m only in the news more at the moment because my boyfriend decided his dick would be more comfortable in some other girl. You know, would have been nice if he could have told me.”

“No, it just means some other girl is faking it now rather than you”

“Amen to that”

————

“Y/N! There you are”

You walk into Greg’s office, iced coffee in hand. This meeting is your first errand of the day, before an interview later and then you’ve got the evening to yourself.

“Hey! So..what ‘big things’ do we have to discuss?”

“Remember when we signed you? You were a wide eyed girl who said she’d do anything to write and perform”

“…yeah”

“Well, this is anything. Too many of you are single. Lia’s fresh off a breakup like you, and so Lottie is the only one in the band who’s actually in a relationship. We’ve got to think about your potential here. If you were to be in a relationship with a famous guy, not only would it mean that you would be seen as even more unattainable, and therefore more wanted, but all eyes would be on you. You’re the hottest ticket in town right now, and a new A-List relationship? Well then you’d be on fire. It’s release week, we need as much as hype as we can get.”

“So you want me to fall in love within the next week? That’s kind of a tall order Greg.”

“No. You wouldn’t actually be in love with the guy, we would just make it seem like you are, stage a couple shots of you guys kissing, give a little quote to the press, maybe a red carpet appearance here and there, and then as soon as the albums doing well, you can drop the act. This could be make or break for the band. Your future depends on this album doing well.”

You were furious. Didn’t he have faith in you guys? He’d been in the studio, he’d seen the pure talent, passion and hard work that had gone into every beat, synth, and lyric. But he thinks that you cementing yourselves is going to be dependent on some guy you don’t even know. “Absolutely not. I don’t want to look back in 50 years and wonder if we made it because of us, or because of a relationship. We’ve got the talent, this isn’t necessary, and I’ve got an interview to be getting to.”

“It’s the way of the industry Y/N, you know that. Of course you have the talent, but people don’t care about that until they care about you. This, this would make them care about you. I put my faith in you, don’t make me regret that now if you’re not willing to go all in.”

“…You promise this is worth it?”

“Absolutely.”

What harm could it do? You’d be seen with some guy for a couple weeks, people would get talking about you and then they’d become interested in your music. Once that happened, they’d see the real you, and love you for your art, not for some false pretence. You might as well give it a try.

“So who’s the guy I’m supposedly dating”

“You might know him, Mason Mount? He’s a footballer, plays for Chelsea with Reece. It’s the perfect fit. We can say you met through Lottie, and he’s got a good boy reputation that alongside your good girl reputation is going to be pure dynamite for the tabloids. It would bring in a whole other audience of people who are interested in him, and are now going to be interested in you.”

You knew exactly who he was on about. You’d been with Lottie to Stamford Bridge a couple of times and every single time your eyes gravitated towards him. There was something about that smile that made him seem like the purest person alive with the most mischievous intentions.

“So, you in?”

“…I guess so.”

#mason mount #mason mount fic #mason mount fanfic #mason mount fluff #mason mount imagine #chelsea fc fanfic #chelsea fc imagine #england nt fic #england nt imagine #england nt fanfic

[dammitolly]

Loki Imagine: "Starting Now"

tw: rather large age gap, swearing, major angst

fluff, angst

Loki x Stark!Reader

You were seventeen when you met Loki Laufeyson. And you must admit... you had a bit of a crush on him. He was being kept prisoner by S.H.E.I.L.D, his power too great and his blood lust overpowering. You found him... interesting.

It only took a couple of tries before Nick Fury found out you were spying on Loki. You would study his mannerisms. For a god, he was quite... human. But, that was before there was a code put on the door, one that was made to keep you away from him.

It had never been explained to you in detail exactly what Loki had done, and you were too busy doing other 17-year-old things to turn on the news. So, Banner kept you as distracted from the trickster god as possible, showing you anything and everything he could in the lab. But, you would occasionally see Loki being escorted to and from his cell, peering into the lab... grinning at you. You couldn't help it, you wondered what he was like... you'd also wondered what those beautiful black locks felt like through your fingers. But those thoughts were just fantasies... ones that would never come true.

You had never been close to anyone capable of that before, capable of killing. Let alone someone who had wanted to do it. But you were a fool... a child. You didn't understand Loki, you didn't understand what he'd done. Not that anyone had bothered to clue you in.

After things got out of control, Tony, your father sent you back to New York where you would stay with Pepper and train for the next three years. Where you would learn how to help your father. Learn how to be an Avenger.

You were nineteen when you saw him again. His hair had gotten longer and his face had aged, but the biggest change was that he was no longer considered an enemy of the Avengers. Now, he was simply accompanying his brother to the compound.

It was almost noon when you first woke up and began making breakfast. It was your day off and you were going to do your favorite activity: sleep.

"My, my" a velvet voice said from behind you, "look who grew up."

You didn't need to turn around to know who was speaking. You grinned and continued to smear butter on your toast. "For the God of Mischief, you really aren't very good at sneaking up on people."

You turned and threw the butter knife, it pierced the wall right above his head. He stood with his eyes wide, his shock was unjustified. For one, if you had wanted to hit him you would; two, he had to have known what you had been doing all these years, what your father required of you.

You took him in as he sauntered through the kitchen, leaning against the bar. He was in desperate need of a haircut, the black locks fell to his shoulders. He wore his traditional solid black suit, not a hint of color. Not even his signature forest green.

He looked tired... as if it had been not two years but twenty. Age had gone well with him though. He looked mature, as though the youthful pranks had stopped a long time ago, like the power-hunger had disappeared.

You smirked, "You've gotten old."

"Two years isn't that long, Y/n." He reached over his head and yanked the knife out of the wall, leaving a small hole. Pepper would kill you for that later. Worth it.

You took the knife from his hand. "It is when you're getting old and fat," you retorted.

Loki chuckled, "You are your father's daughter."

You rolled your eyes, "Did you need something? Or do you enjoy seeing the mental agony you inflict upon me?"

"Actually, I was looking for your father."

You pointed your knife towards the elevator at the other end of the room, "Lab. Lower level. You should be familiar with that wing." The wing he had been kept prisoner in. The wing you had strolled down almost every day when you were seventeen just to catch a glimpse of the handsome prisoner.

"Thank you, darling," he replied as he strolled over to the elevator. He smiled and gave you a wink before the doors slid shut. You rolled your eyes.

Darling? Absolutely not.

Dinner was the most awkward thing that you've ever been forced to sit through. The fear of Loki and his manipulation loomed over the table like fog. Steve was watching him like a feral animal that would attack at any second. As if he were a venomous snake ready to strike at any given moment.

"So," Thor cleared his throat awkwardly, "Y/n, your father tells me you've been training in New York. How's that going?"

"It's a lot of work but it's a nice way to spend time," you said through a bite of mashed potatoes. "Right now I'm focusing more on science so I can help Bruce and dad. But Natasha is really wanting to do more combat training with me."

"Y/n fights now?" Loki asked, grinning at you.

You shrugged, "Not much, but I could definitely kick your ass."

"Could you now? I suppose we'll have to put that to the test, won't we Miss Stark?" Loki said with a wink.

Natasha laughed, "Y/n is a bit too soft right now. Once she gets over her fear of actually hurting someone I think she'll be an excellent fighter."

"The knife she threw at me this morning must have been an expression of that fear."

"Y/n Stark!" Pepper said from the other end of the table, "You did not put that hole in my wall."

"He was annoying me!" You said defensively.

"He annoys everyone, you don't see Tony throwing silverware at his head."

"No he just blasts him to hell with his suits," you deadpanned.

Pepper looked at Tony. "You see where she gets it? I told you seventeen was too young for training. I told you that the violence would rub off on-"

"Can we not argue at the table, please?" You said, looking back and forth between your father and Pepper.

She rolled her eyes, "Fine. But you're going to fix that wall young lady."

"Fine," you sighed with a roll of your eyes. You caught Loki grinning at you from across the table and went back to picking at your food.

"Here I was thinking we were going to have a civilized dinner," Loki chuckled.

Cap scoffed, "Civilized?"

"Cap," your father said with a warning tone.

"What?" Steve said defensively, "I'm just wondering where a murderer gets off saying anything about being civilized."

"That's rich coming from you," Loki retorted. "Do I need to remind you of all the innocents you killed in Sokovia? So many lives sacrificed in the name of doing the right thing."

"Brother!" Thor snapped.

"I'm just trying to level the playing field," Loki grinned. "If I'm going to be put on trial, perhaps everyone else should get off their high horse as well?"

"We have never been on the same level, Loki." Steve snapped, "You tried to conquer this planet. You lied, manipulated, stole, killed innocent humans. All because you wanted a power trip. That wasn't Sokovia, we thought we were doing the right thing, all you wanted to do was the wrong thing. All you wanted to do was kill."

"You speak as though I don't have the ability to change," Loki leaned his elbows on the table. "Isn't that what being on this planet is all about? Second chances?"

"Not for murderers," Steve spat.

You didn't know Loki well... but to the extent that you did know him, you knew that when he was embarrassed he also got angry and violent. But not this time. Loki was the picture of serenity and calm as he stood from his spot at the table. "I see how it is," he muttered, "I suppose I should have just stayed... gone."

With that... he left.

It was 3 AM by the time you left your room again. For no other reason than to break into Thor's cookie stash. He was convinced it was your father that had been stealing from him... wrong Stark.

You prayed that nobody would find you digging in the pantry for two reasons. One: Thor would kill you for stealing his snacks; two, you were in your underwear and a tank top. Anyone other than Pepper seeing you in this state would be humiliating.

But, of course, you can never get what you want. Behind you, you heard soft footsteps padding their way into the kitchen.

"I didn't realize you'd be awake," the masculine voice said from behind you. You turned and saw Loki, shirtless in low-hanging black sweatpants. You did your best to force your eyes away from the dark trail of hair below his belly button and into his pants.

As your eyes met his, you could see the light blush on his cheeks. Fuck, he'd caught you staring. He cleared his throat, "I just thought I'd make some tea. For some reason, I don't sleep well in Midgard."

"Perhaps it's all the memories," You muttered as he stood next to you at the counter.

"For christ's sake, Y/n," he slammed his mug down onto the counter, "I am not that person anymore, you know that."

"Do I?" You turned to face him, "You killed innocent people, Loki. You killed children-"

"I know what I did," he sighed, putting his head in his hands, "I'm trying to fix it. I want to be better than I was."

"Loki we can't just trust you," the tea was long forgotten at this point, the water had probably gone cold, "not after what you did."

Loki huffed and yanked the butcher knife out of the block, placing it in your hand. He wrapped his hand around yours and put the knife to his chest, only a little pressure would need to be applied in order for it to tear his skin.

"Loki, what are you-"

He shushed you, "I am literally putting my life in your hands. I want you to see that I am done hurting people, and if you killing me is how to prove it, then so be it."

You tried to pull away but he pulled you back in with enough force to make your knees buckle. You weren't looking at the knife against his pale, muscular chest. But his blue eyes that were begging you to acknowledge his sincerity.

Your grip on the kitchen knife loosened. It clattered to the floor as you wrapped your arms around him, pressing your face into his warm chest. "I don't want to hurt you," you whispered.

You felt him sigh in relief, "I don't want to hurt anyone either. If anyone here is willing to trust me, I want it to be you."

"Why me?"

He pulled away and cupped your face in his hands, "Because you are the first truly good person I've met on this planet. You give me hope, Y/n." He pressed a kiss to your forehead.

"You don't have to be that person ever again, Loki," you kissed his Adam's apple gently, "I promise I will help you through this."

You felt him lean down slightly, wrapping his arms around your waist to pull you up to meet him. You immediately felt your breath hasten. You had been fantasizing about this moment since you were in high school... and now it was about to happen. Loki, God of Mischief, was about to kiss you at 3 AM in the kitchen of the Avengers compound.

Before you could take another breath, his lips were against yours. His lips were soft like you'd always imagined they'd be, and his mouth was hot like the rest of him. He groaned into the kiss when your tongue brushed against his. You raked your fingers through his hair.

He parted his lips from yours in order to lift you onto the counter, standing in between your legs, his hands trailing up your sides.

"Wait, wait," you gasped as you pulled your lips from his, "How do I know you're not about to use me?"

Loki smiled and tucked some stray hair behind your ear, "I'll never lie to you, my darling. I'll be good for you... starting now."

You pressed your forehead against his and kissed the tip of his nose, "Starting now."

#loki x reader #loki laufeyson #loki x you #loki imagine #stark!reader #mcu #marvel cinematic universe #marvel imagine #marvel #avengers fanfiction #loki fanfiction

[genshxn]

@/datonecanadianartist asked:

A Zhongli x reader where the reader is a chaos magnet like Bennett, but unlike him they refuse to get any help and finally Zhongli tricks them to help them? Many thanks friend!

i hope this is something like what you had in mind :,D

it’s also a little long lmao-

【ｚｈｏｎｇｌｉ】

chaos magnet s/o refuses to get help until they get tricked (ft. Chongyun)

warnings ; haunting

There was only one other person you had heard of who had your level of bullshit, and it was some poor kid who lived in Mondstadt. Apparently the events that would follow you were on par with what he’d experience.

And more often than not, your partner Zhongli would get caught in the cross fire. Treasure hoarders would always know where you are. Zhongli would just send them flying with his monoliths, however. Or maybe you’d get hit in the head by an incoming bird, also knocking into Zhongli in the process. Either way, it’s always a little messy in the end.

He was more concerned for your safety than anything. You miraculously don’t get hurt amidst the chaos, but he isn’t sure how long this is going to last. The last thing he wants is for you to get hurt.

He’s tried to get you to do all sorts of things to try and get rid of this abysmal luck of yours. He’s bought about 30 different charms supposedly imbued with energy to repel bad luck. You refused to carry any.

Another time, you walked into your bedroom with him looking like he was about to start some kind of ritual, just waiting for you to arrive. You scrambled back out the door, not having a bar of it, and he had to chase you for a very long time before he finally caught you.

So those didn’t work.

Zhongli was wandering the streets of Liyue one day, simply wondering what else he could do to try and cure this ailment of yours, if it even was an ailment.

His mind wandered to something Hu Tao was prattling on about to do with mischievous ghosts causing trouble for people in their daily lives. He had overheard her talking about this in passing the other day. Perhaps this was something going on with you.

So he sought the help of an exorcist.

Except given his current track record, no way in hell was he going to be able to get you to sit down and stay still for the exorcist to do their work. So he’d have to come up with a plan to keep you in one place.

"My darling, tonight is a beautiful night in the harbour. Would you perchance go to dinner with me?" He asks you. He hopes he’s not being too suspicious to suddenly ask you to dinner out of the blue.

“Oh, yeah sure. I’ll go get ready.” You say, getting up to get changed into something a little nicer. Your hesitation likely would have come from the fact that he asked you so suddenly. He doesn’t blame you.

When you finally emerge from your room, you look lovely. He really wonders how you always look so good. But a little part inside him feels guilty because what he has planned may ruin your clothes slightly...

You make your way to Third Round Knockout where Zhongli had already made a reservation. The two of you sit and decide what you’ll order. He wants you to eat first before he potentially ruins your evening. Zhongli casts a glance beside him, where the young, blue haired exorcist was sitting eagerly. Zhongli previously told the exorcist his plan. The exorcist was to look like another customer for the time being until Zhongli gives the signal to begin the ritual. Zhongli would take care of keeping you in place so you don’t escape anywhere.

The two of you enjoy a lovely meal together, but you couldn’t help notice that Zhongli has been looking a little fidgety the entire time.

“Are you okay? You’ve been acting suspicious all evening.” You say, finishing your last mouthful of dessert.

Zhongli exhales and opens his eyes to meet yours. He looks very guilty. “I’m sorry for this, but it’s to help you.”

Before you could question what he meant by that, a stone structure had snapped around your waist and arms, keeping you in place. It wasn’t so tight that you couldn’t breath, but you certainly couldn’t go anywhere either.

“Zhongli, what?!”

“Chongyun,” He says. A blue haired youth in white attire jumps up from his chair and quickly summons six talismans in a hexagon, which then fly out towards you.

Everyone else in the surrounding area looks at you. There you were with a stone containment and talismans attached to your head.

“Evil spirit be purged!” The exorcist slams his fist onto his palm and the talismans all quickly dissipate. With a harrowing scream from an unknown source, a weight feels like it’s been lifted off your shoulders.

“Wow! That was my first proper exorcism!” The boy exclaims. An exorcism? You were being haunted?

“What?!” You suddenly cry out. People suddenly look over in your direction.

“Ah, so my theory was correct,” Zhongli says to himself. “It was a malicious spirit following you around.”

“A ghost?”

“Yes. It was quite a potent one too. It managed to resist my pure yang energy enough to not run off in my presence,” The exorcist happily explains. “I don’t know how it got attached to you, but that should be the end of whatever harm it was causing you. Very well, I’d best be on my way now. My services are free of charge!” He says as a final note and walks off, barely containing his excitement of his first proper exorcism.

“Oh thank the gods, I forgot to pay him,” Zhongli mutters under his breath.

“Can you let me go now?” You ask.

“Oh! Yes, right. My apologies.” With a wave of his hand, your rocky constraints dissolve back into the earth.

“Right... Now what the hell was that?”

“I suppose I do owe you an explanation. It wasn’t fair of me to do something without your knowledge, but I had enlisted that exorcist on the chance that there was a ghost causing your abhorrent luck. Such events simply aren’t natural... But it turns out it was true. I’m very sorry for doing all this behind your back. I just don’t want you to eventually get hurt one day. The circumstances you could find yourself in could be perilous, and I don’t want to see the one I love suffer so often. It feels selfish since you didn’t want to do anything, but—“

You cut off Zhongli by placing a finger on his lips. “You don’t need to apologize so much. Thank you for looking out for me. It means a lot to me.” You pull him into a hug. The poor guy looked sad from guilt, so you have to show him he’s not in trouble. “But I won’t be able to have anymore crazy stories.”

“I think you’ve had enough for a life time for now.” He replies.

#genshin #genshin impact #genshin impact x reader #genshin x reader #zhongli #zhongli x reader #zhongli imagines