#lgbt advice

[justinf83]

#beats radio #atipycal #im high #lgbt advice #giulia nassa #f-able #rocks #marry me #kol x davina #dancing

[rocksandaces]

Repeat after me:

Labels are not rules

Labels are not promises

Labels are not fixed

Labels are not necassary

Labels were created to be helpful, if they are not, you can get rid of them and do what you want

#lgbtq #asexual #ace #queer #aroace #aromantic #label #micro labels #lgbt advice

[weeby-monster-the-bastard]

just a little trans vent

TW: phalloplasty, dysphoria, SH

so i was just doing some research on transgender-affirming care and was like "huh isn't there one that is bottom surgery?" so I researched about it and I'm getting mixed results I don't have very bad bottom dysphoria most of the time but I don't want a v#gina I started to get freaked out about how long it will take and the scar I would have from my arm or thigh and I was looking at the results it seemed 'ugly' to me (not saying you are wrong for getting one if you are happy with how it looks great I'm happy for you ^^) it just looks like a meat tube not even like it looks like the actual cis thing so I am worried if I get it I will regret it but I want to make a full transition I'm just so stuck between the two either get it and regret it if it doesn't go well or suffer feeling not enough of a man its just so terrifying for me since I couldn't handle that scar even so since I have so many SH scars that I think they would deny me even if I really wanted it since both my thighs and forearms have scars all over I just need advice I feel stuck and alone

#lgbtq #transgender #pride #lgbt #ftm #trans guy #trans #demiboy #transmasc #trans surgery #advice #lgbt advice

[uncanny-tranny]

Hi, I'm just wondering, as a transmasc gay guy, how do l help ppl respect me better? I would love to get on T and have top surgery (it was banned in my state for everyone on medicaid, so l can't). If you have any suggestions I would love to hear about it.

I'll be honest, I think it really depends on different factors and what you want from each relationship.

Some things that can help is to ask yourself:

What would I want a stranger to know and respect? An acquaintance? A friend? A close friend?

What does respecting me look like, and what would I be most comfortable with? Is this impacted by how close I am with somebody?

When I answered these questions myself, it became a lot clearer to me about my own comfort levels and how I felt best respected. So, for instance, a stranger isn't going to be told by me about my sexuality because I'm not comfortable with that (and, hell, even really close friends aren't given that level of intimacy often). I use sexuality as my example because I am more sensitive about it than being a guy.

Sometimes, the most respect will come from people who don't know your entire life story, and I think many queer people are so caught up in almost "proving" that they deserve to be respected that they tend to overcompensate. I don't fault anybody for this, but ultimately... You can only do so much "for" other people when it comes to respect that you can't be blamed if somebody sees that you want to be respected and they choose not to do that. It hurts, and it's scary, but it also isn't your fault.

I think it also depends on who you are trying to help in terms of understanding you, your comfort, and your needs. Some people will need to have a level of trust in order to relate, and some won't need your whole life's story in order to understand. When it comes to social exchanges like this, I think it's best to try understanding the other person, too, because their own experiences will impact their own threshold for understanding others.

I don't have a ton of those social scripts because this is highly interpersonal and impacted heavily on your own cultures, norms, and the overall attitudes or stereotypes that may (or may not) have about queer people. I do genuinely want to guide others, but I want to do so in a way where you can easily and without guilt discard what won't work for you. I seek to inspire, not to dictate.

I tend to see the most success from doing the above, so to simplify:

Understand your own comfort levels

Differentiate those comfort levels based on your relationship with others

Understand that you are not responsible for how other people ultimately do or don't respect you

Have strong, clear boundaries whenever possible. In the event that somebody doesn't respect you, have a plan for either addressing it or not engaging with them

Remember that you have inherent worth and deserve to be treated well

I really hope that maybe this gives you some ideas. Again, I don't want to tell you what to do, just inspire you to think about your own comfort and sense of safety. If anyone has ideas, feel free to share<3

#ask #long post #queer #lgbt #lgbtq #lgbt advice #frankly i think this applies to many different queer folk

[nnationaltreasure]

hi. i’m once again questioning my sexuality and could use some insight from the aromantic community.

i am wondering if i could be aromantic due to the fact that the idea of falling in love makes me cringe. but like, i also yearn for love and i feel desperately lonely all the time. i’ve had relationships before (in my teen years (yikes)) and sometimes i find myself like.. thinking about that. i wish i had someone to like… be physically close with in a non sexual way. but the actual thought of meeting someone and getting to know them (romantically) and falling in love and navigating a relationship makes me feel extremely uncomfortable and anxious. i love reading about romance and it physically hurts sometimes to read about two people being so deeply in love and i also do believe in love at first sight in some cases but like … idk. it’s different when i picture myself in any of those situations. but like could that be aromanticism or is this just my anxiety

do you, if you identity as aromantic, ever yearn for love?

i know this is something i have to figure out for myself but like. it would help to hear other people’s stories and feelings. thank you

#aromantic #aroace #asexuality #lgbtq community #lgbt advice #am i aromantic? #i am asexual btw

[idcyaz]

🫡.

#gwlg #girl who likes girls #lesbian #lesbian submission #lesbians #girl who loves girls #gay #gay girl #girl who kisses girls #lgbtq #lgbt blog #lgbtq community #ask me anything #asks #send asks #advice blog #lgbt advice #advice #ask me stuff #confession #confess

[bra1nwashed]

i asked an aro blog about this a while ago but they still haven't responded, so i'm just gonna go ahead and ask on my own blog. i've been trying to get more of an education of aromanticism and its spectrum, so i've been questioning a few things.

first of all, i know a person can be aro and still desire a relationship. however, it is possible to want what would come with a relationship, correct? examples being kissing, cuddling, sex (for alloaros), etc. this would still be considered aro, would it not? also, what would the relationship be called? i personally feel like girlfriend and boyfriend indicate romantic relation, but could still be used. but what about friends with benefits or something?

second, are there restrictions on labels? and if so, how many and what are they? can you consider yourself (on the) aromantic (spectrum) but not be a hundred percent sure all the time? i commonly wonder if maybe attraction i'm experiencing is romantic, and then i feel guilty and sick at the thought that i've been telling people a lie about me for so long. but if i don't know, or don't understand, or can't distinguish the attraction, i can still say i'm on the aromantic spectrum, right?

#aromantic #aro #allosexual aromantic #alloaro #lgbtq+ #questioning #romantic identity #lgbt advice #aromanticism #aromantic spectrum #arospec

[asexual-in-distress]

Hello! I am fellow asexual in crisis rn. I don't have anyone to seek help to. And came to internet for that. I hope i won't be bothering you or anything. Feel free to ignore this ask. I've come here today to seek suggestions from you about this situationship I'm in rn. I'm not good with words so I'll just go straight to the point.

I'm a 20 yo bi romantic afab seggs impulsed ace and never had any sort of romantic relationship. I am involved in this fun community since June and i met someone this july. We have only met 3 times since we live quite far away from each other, and planning our next meet next week. We've been talking and playfully flirting with each other since day one. And somehow on our last hangout we became closer, and flirting became more serious and deep. And now it's literally clear we like each other. That's not actually the problem though. I'm pretty open about my sexuality. And I'm pretty sure he knows it.

The problem is after talking to him in a romantic sense I don't want to carry on with this. I don't want to get involved with this situation. There's nothing wrong with him. He's a sweetheart gentleman. I just don't know why but the "butterflies" i used to get a few days ago seems like a burden rn. As if, The idea of being in a relationship repulses me. I've been thinking if I'm aromatic or not for quite some time now. Got rid if that thought because i like the idea of falling in love. Now that I'm getting something similar I don't think I like it..

But i think he's getting way too attached with me and idk how to deal with this situation. I'm not experienced enough nor do i have anyone who would be able to understand my troubles. I'm not even sure if it's about aromantisism or just me being terrified of the idea of love.

Hey! I’ll try to help I’m any way I can. First off I am no expert and have only been in one relationship myself so take my advice with a grain or salt. That being said let’s get into this.

I know it sounds a bit cliche but have you tried telling him that you don’t want a relationship? Being honest about that before things go any further is a wise move. If you have, and that didn’t cause him to back off, that’s a red flag. Him not willing to back off on the pursuit of a relationship after you have set a boundary isn’t someone you want to friends with.

Also noting what you said about liking the idea of falling in love. Liking the idea of something and actually feeling or pursuing it are very different things. I honestly have been struggling with my romantic orientation for a while and am also boarding on biromantic and aromantic. So I can understand it’s difficult to figure out.

With that said. Hopefully people in the comments can add a bit more advice and experience to the discussion. I hope this helped even just a little. And good luck!!

#lgbtqia #lgbtq #alphabet mafia #ace positivity #ace pride #asexual #aroace #asexual pride #biromantic #relationship #lgbt advice

[burningaceofspades]

Petition to protect Net Neutrality, which is your freedom of speech on the internet. Directly this has actively censored queer people and has on the Internet since 2018, ban visual displays of sexual and showing your sexuality. On top of that, even if you are a person who does not like prostitution, this also makes prostitution and conversation around prostitution censored. Which is directly dangerous for the prostitutes and makes it where they and people advocating for them can't properly fight for their rights (you can't if you can't even talk about the injustices you face). Sex workers deserve rights, spaces to talk, and opportunity.

Sex work will never be gone, it is a valid means of income and supporting yourself, the very least we can make it safer for them to work. As it is a job, and even dare call a self-employed business if someone is going through themselves (or working with people close to them) and not a pimp. (Pimps/Traditional Pimps can be really dangerous and we don't support them at all. Pimps do/can protect their workers in the dangerous cities, but a lot of pimps aren't pimps to protect prostitutes and a lot of prostitutes get hurt or in worse situations because of them.)

https://chng.it/KZTgDswFLQ

#queer stuff #net neutrality #human rights #civil rights #petition #united states #self employed #censorship #anti censorship #the backrooms #lgbtq #lgbtqplus #lgbt nsft #lgbt advice

[tripleadisaster]

A question for my fellow AFAB trans people (transmasc, non-binary or something else):

If you are planning to get top surgery, already had it, are just thinking about it, or not thinking about it at all: how would you describe how you feel about having boobs?

A bit of context: I myself identify with agender/non-binary and am at the start of my journey to get top surgery one day. So I am talking with a psychologist specialised in trans related healthcare, and naturally get questions like "how do you feel about your boobs", "how did you feel when you got your first period", etc.

But since avoiding feelings (probably because I grew up just thinking I was the weird one/outlier in feeling not at home in my body) is easier than actually dealing with them I'm having some issues translating this to my psychologist.

So the best thing I could think of was what I heard when I was a small child: that there were people who would get an arm/leg/other limb amputated because it was so to say "not a part that belonged to their body". And that felt a lot like how I feel about having boobs, I hate it, and they don't belong on my body.

Needless to say I found out right after saying that, that this was body dismorphia, and that it was pretty much considered to be a mental illness and that amputations because of body dismorphia rarely happened.

So now I am wondering how other people would explain this feeling, mostly out of curiosity but also because I am now questioning my own identity again since I feel like a lot of people expect me to transition FtM but that doesn't exactly feel right either.

Anyways, I doubt this will get a lot of answers, but I hope y'all can help me out a bit. Thanks in advance!

#trans healthcare #agender #nonbinary #transgender #questioning #lgbt advice #lgbtqia #lgbtq

[charizardfiresworld]

If you support lgb and think that we should remove transgender people from the lgbtq+ acronym, you're not a lgbtq+ ally.

Transgender woman of color are the reason why we have our rights today. People like Marsha P. Johnson gave their lives so that the gay and lesbian community could have the rights we have today.

People like Silvia Rivera fought every single day, attending and organized protests, facing police brutality, all for gay liberation.

During the stone wall riots, most of the lgbtqia+ community didn't even so much as thank the transgender community for giving us our rights, instead they cursed them off the stages, and didn't even accept them into gay bars. It was years before we started giving them the acceptance we see now today.

Transgender violence, especially violence against trans women of color is still incredibly high, and right now the transgender community needs us to fight for their rights in the US. We are facing transgender genocide, and now is not the time to abandon our own community. They fought for us, now it's time for us to fight alongside them.

#nonbinary #enby positivity #enby things #transgender #lgbtqiia+ #lgbtq #lgbt representation #lgbt advice #lgbtq community

[the-one-eyed-seer]

Don’t let conservatives convince you there’s no other queer people in your area. Yes, even in small towns. Yes, even in the Midwest. Yes, even in Appalachia. Yes, even in those rural pockets of the North. Yes, even in Alaska. There’s other queer people out there, even if you can’t get to them, even if you don’t know who they are

#lgbt advice #lgbtqia #positivity

[thetopichot]

I have seen some cisgender people confused who are lesbian, gay, or straight when it comes to dating nonbinary people.

So hi, I'm Louie & I'm a fem nonbinary person! I also have a boyfriend who is straight but I'm gonna help clear up things (hopefully).

☆ミ Disclaimer ☆ミ

Please take my words with a grain of salt because every experience is absolutely different & this is my own personal experience including my own interpretation of it as well. Please don't use this as like full evidence & do ask around people who are also in a similar spot to gain a little more of a idea. I'm not responsible for what you do. Please don't sue me. Thank yewwww :3 - Louie

Being in relationships are complicated. They always will be but you can always make things less complicated by just asking & having a conversation about it with your partner!

My boyfriend, let's call him "N" for the rest of this for convenience, loves me for who I am. However, N does struggle using my preferred pronouns (They/Them) but it doesn't mean he loves me any less. He still tries & that matters because it shows that he cares & respects my identity. This information is also kinda new to N since I told him before we started dating (Which was not long ago). Everyone's experiences is different so I'm just sharing mine to give you a bit of a example.

I was scared of telling him that I was nonbinary because I was really scared of him not loving me but I was wrong because he loved me anyway.

However, this may not be the case for everyone. People tend to be a bit more accepting of someone being of someone's sexuality than someone's gender which sucks. It's also scary as well when you fall in love with someone that potentially harm you with that information especially when you're closeted. So when it comes to telling someone you're apart of the nonbinary spectrum, people make it even more complicated than it should be.

Telling someone you love that you are not a girl or not a boy is hard because of the multiple consequences that come from it & we wish it was just a simple "I understand :]" but it's not.

So I'm gonna tell you what you can do if they don't accept you:

Break up

Which kinda sounds very harsh as hell but it's one of the many truths that you gotta handle. You cannot force someone to accept you because not everyone is going to. You are going have to just move on which is not easy for anyone. You should never change who you are for someone. Relationships should make you feel safe, welcomed, & feel like warm home that you can always come to when needed comfort.

However if your partner refuses to provide you that & neglect your identity that makes you "you"? Then you gonna have to find someone else that will love you for who you are.

Now the cis people in the audience lemme tell you something:

If you are uncomfortable with dating a nonbinary person, that's 100% okay as long you're respectful of their identity.

This doesn't make you a dick. People in the comments are definitely gonna come at me for this but like I said "my opinion my rules" & if you don't like it, find someone else to listen to. No one should force you into a relationship that you're uncomfortable with. Everyone in that relationship should feel like a equal not a slave to a relationship that you're not happy with. However, this is no excuse of you being a asshole.

Be respectful to someone's identity.

"If I accept their identity & continue this relationship with them, does this make me gay/straight?"

It depends how you see it. In my opinion, if ya straight, then you're straight. If ya gay, then ya gay. Dating a nonbinary person doesn't change your sexuality but if it does make you uncomfortable, that's completely up to you. That's how I see it.

"How can I help my nonbinary partner feel comfortable?"

First of all, that's what I like to see & it's always good to assure your partner that you're there for them. Second of all, you can always ask your partner what's wrong & if you're not sure what to ask, some nice neutral questions would be:

"What can I do help you?"

"How can I help you?"

Otherwise, do what you can to help your partner. That being asking other nonbinary people about their experiences or just using the information found on the internet. However, take everything with a grain of salt.

In conclusion:

Please make nonbinary people feel accepted without being a dickhead. Make sure they have space to make them be safe for who they are because they are people out there that hurt, harm, kill people like us. So the least you can do is just make me feel like me.

- Louie

#the cat speaks #ramble #rambles #nonbinary #lgbtq #lgbtqia #enby #relationship advice #relationships #non binary #lgbtq+ #lgbt #advice #relationship #lgbt advice #once again #please take this with a grain of salt #not every relationship is like mine #please do research #please ask fellow enbies #relationships are complex #but thats okay #as long as there is communication #thanks

[rocksandaces]

Some of yall may find it useful

I recently found the best way to respond when people (esp older relatives) ask me about marriage and relationships or just my personal life in general and give their advice.

"why don't you find a boyfriend?" "but what for?"

Because people can't actually give you a reason why you need a romantic partner in your life. Or why any of the ideas they try to push on you is good.

I hope it helps someone who is also sick of having conversations about your personal life on family gatherings

#asexual #aroace #lgbtq #lgbtpeople #lgbtqplus #lgbt advice #aromantic

[queer-shit-posts]

You never, never.. listen N E V E R assumes someone likes you. Your heart lies to you, your heart sends wrong signals to your brain…. You need to sure them like you, not assume

Ok? Ok

#lesbian situationship #situationships #lgbt advice #lesbian advice #how prevent a broke heart

[runa333]

Kinda random buttttt

I'm AFAB, and I've been using the non binary label for a while now. It just was more simple to explain to people.

But honestly.. I don't feel like that label even makes me comfortable anymore.

I know exactly how to describe my gender.

I don't care about my gender assigned at birth, but I want to be called a boy. I want to be a boy but I wouldn't transition because mainly it scares me but also my dysphoria isn't bad enough to make me feel like I need to. If I were to wear a packer and if I keep wearing my binder, I feel completely fine and I feel masc enough. BUT I want to dress feminine, wear make up, cute skirts, all while looking like a boy. Like a femboy kinda! But I don't know if I can call myself trans because I don't want to transition, and I don't care what my gender assigned at birth is. I just want to be called a boy, use he/him pronouns, and dress/express like the stereotypical female.

But I don't want to talk about it because when I have in the past, people say things like "well, just be a girl, if you look like one that's what people are gonna call you anyways." I don't want to make people mad or make me feel like my gender isn't valid, so I've just been using the non binary label. It's simpler than explaining all that..

But at the same time, I want to just be myself.

Does anyone else feel this way? Like even if it's the other way around or in any shape similar. I know this whole post is probably pretty confusing, but I just want some help. I don't have anyone to really talk to about this..

#lgbt help #lgbtq community #lgbtqia+ #non binary #enby struggles #trans pride #transgender #transgender pride #trans problems #lgbt advice #lgbt pride