#let the mechanics my beloved have fun

[the-last-teabender]

It's been days but I'm still thinking about how someone basically asked Neil Gaiman for passive permission to use AI for writer's block and he was like "I recommend having a friend instead"

and a lot of people were like "lol yeah but your friend was Pterry" and SURE. POINT.

But the majority of friends I consult when I have writer's block are not prolific beloved authors. And many aren't authors, period.

The story I just sent in to an editor? The friend who got me unstuck is a mechanic by trade, a writer once in a while for fun. He's also known me for half my life, knows what kinds of stories I like to write, and knows what makes an entertaining story for the readership I was writing for (since he's part of it). The whole second half of the story - the good part - came about because of his suggestion. You can read it probably later this year and let me know if he was helpful, but I'm pretty sure you'll agree that he was.

Your consultant for writer's block doesn't have to be The Late Sir Terry Pratchett to be worthwhile. A friend who knows you and enjoys a good story will still help you infinitely more than an algorithm whose only chance of knowing anything about you is if it was fed one of your stories.

#and randomthunk is one of my go-tos for writer's block also #the swan and the flame is largely down to her #again a few words of suggestion that worked because she knows me and my nonsense

[harrywavycurly]

My beloved @harrywavycurly ! I’m on anon because I’m shy. 🫣 Will we get a lil bonus chat of Eddie waking her up after her nap and setting her straight that he doesn’t hate her?? Your fluff gives me the will to live. (Obviously it’s fine if we don’t, I just know you sometimes post extras and I was curious!)💗💗💗

Hiii babes!! Awe no need to be shy but I totally get it!! I can gladly give you a little conversation with them when she wakes up from her nap! You’re so sweet and I hope you enjoy💖

-find all things One Night Stand Eddie here✨

“Eddie?” “Yeah?…oh you need help getting up?” “No I was just seeing if you were home…so..uhm I’m ready to hear…whatever the fuck it is you wanted me to hear.” “Okay…uh well…for starters I’m sorry if I made you think I hate you…I don’t…not at all.” “That’s good…I don’t hate you either.” “Good that’s good…uhm and I…I uh am sorry I haven’t…tried to get to know you more…I’m gonna try to be nicer.” “I uhm…I’ll try to be nicer as well…I’m sorry I can be…mean it’s just…a defense mechanism I’ve had since I was little…” “i get it…people fucking suck and it’s easier to be mean to them before they’re mean to you…trust me…I get it.” “We can just uh…start fresh maybe? Just try to be friends and stuff.” “Okay…well uhm I’m Eddie Munson and I don’t know if you know this or not but I’m actually having a baby soon…” “really? Girl or boy?” “Girl…her name is Dorothy Anne Munson…her mom and grandpa actually named her.” “They have great taste…” “Yeah…yeah they do.” “So Eddie Munson…what are you doing tomorrow night?” “Uh nothing?” “Would…you like to see the new Halloween movie with me?…Michael is kinda my favorite out of the big four.” “Big four?” “Yeah? You know…Michael Jason…Freddy and Ghostface..the big four.” “Is that actually a thing?” “I mean I think so? It’s what i call them…so uhm…yes or no to the movies? Don’t feel all obligated to go just because I’m carrying your baby and all.” “You’re so annoying…yes I’d like to see Halloween with you.” “Cool…oh uhm you know…there’s nothing uh going on…between Steve and I right?” “Oh uh I didn’t…think there was anything going on…between you two…but thanks for letting me know.” “I just thought maybe that’s why you get so upset when I hang out with him…it’s always just us hanging out and watching the kids…that’s it.” “You like the kids huh?” “They’re growing on me…Mike is a little annoying but Dustin and Max are fun.” “Yeah Dustin is…entertaining to say the least.” “Not to cut this moment short but uh…can you help me up? I really have to pee.” “Oh shit yeah yeah here….there…you go…uh lunch is ready by the way.” “Oh thank god I’m starving…oh Wayne said you can come to dinner…i called him before falling asleep.” “Oh…nice…are you okay with that?” “He’s your dad Eddie…of course I’m okay with it.” “Okay..uh well I’ll be in the kitchen do you want me to bring your lunch to you in bed or will you sit and eat with me on my ugly ass green couch?” “I will sit in the ugly couch…”

#one night stand convos #eddie munson slow burn #eddie munson enemies to lovers #eddie munson au #eddie munson x pregnant!reader #eddie munson x y/n #eddie munson x you #eddie munson x you fluff #eddie munson x reader fluff #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson x fem!reader #eddie munson x fem!reader fluff #eddie munson series #eddie munson social media au #Eddie Munson #my little dungeon master baby

[zeonomicon]

I gotta ask: I've been craving G1 Soundeave having his buttons played with, either SFW or NSFW, I just *shakes fist* I need them to be pressed. Soundwave my beloved <333

Wonderful ask, I see you are a fellow person of culture. Shout out to Soundwave, gotta be one of my favourite stim toys.

Since the pairing wasn't specified, I went with a Cybertronian reader.

Answer under the cut, mostly SFW but suggestive.

G1 Soundwave x Cybertronian!Reader

It was nice to have moments like this with just the two of you, when Soundwave had a chance to take a break from his multifarious duties keeping the ship running and neither of you were being roped into the latest of Megatron's grand plans to take down the Autobots once and for all. You were reclined on the berth with the TIC in your lap, playing some pre-war song he'd kept in his databanks while you caught up on a holonovel you'd become engrossed in. You hadn't been paying much attention to the lyrics, captivated by the story unfolding in your datapad, but as a few lines caught your attention you decided to play it back to hear the last verse again. You snaked your arm around Soundwave's waist, feeling for the raised surfaces of his buttons, and Soundwave stiffened a bit; you supposed in surprise. You pressed his stop button, then your digits found the narrow-angled edge of his rewind button and you held it down for a few seconds before pressing play. Each button lit up energon magenta when you pressed it. Soundwave's buttons were quite satisfying to press, offering a little resistance and making a pleasing click once activated.

Soundwave's servo had gripped your knee while you fiddled with his buttons, but now he laid himself against you with his backstrut to your chassis and his helm on your shoulder, leaving not much room for you to pick up your datapad and read again. You didn't mind, content to enjoy your lover's music for a little while. You moved your servo, intending to set your datapad aside, but he placed his own servo over it quickly. Curious. Experimentally, you stroked his play button with one digit, feeling the texture of the raised symbol, and then slowly applied pressure, holding it just before its active position. Soundwave's cooling fans clicked on.

Emboldened, you held down the rewind and fast forward buttons at the same time, causing the music to stutter and skip before smoothing back out as Soundwave corrected the contradicting inputs internally. He pushed up into your touch keenly. You pressed all of his buttons at once, then alternated quickly switching between each of them in random order, deriving equal gratification from the sheer fun of playing with him as from the way Soundwave arched and shifted in your hold, vents growing shallow.

You pressed the record button and moved in close to him, winding your arms about his chassis and running your digits up the smooth glass. Soundwave let out a whine filled with static when your digits left his buttons, but then you found the eject button on his shoulder and his visor brightened in anticipation. You splayed your servo over his chest compartment and pushed, the spring mechanism attempting to propel the tape deck open only to be met with resistance. He pressed himself even more firmly back against you to give it room to open, but you pushed it shut with a click, holding the button down. Soundwave's visor flickered. "Release it."

"Or what?" You massaged his compartment, pushing hard with your thumb just above his lower hinge to keep it closed, your digits stretching to mess with the buttons on his abdomen again, playing back Soundwave's melodious sighs and the hum of cooling fans.

"Or Soundwave: Will press your buttons."

#Zeo Writes #Requests #Anon Ask #One Shot #Soundwave x Reader #Cybertronian Reader #Reader Insert #Suggestive #Kibbleplay #Ish #Soundwave #Transformers G1 #G1 Soundwave #Transformers #Don't worry Soundwave is using a special Cybertronian tape that doesn't erase when you record over it #I actually have a whole plethora of headcanons for how Soundwave's buttons work

[yanderes-galore]

Could I Request a yandere arkhamverse harley quinn concept? -🎂

Sure! Writing Harley Quinn could be fun :) This felt a bit everywhere but most of my fics are me just letting my thoughts flow without planning so I hope you enjoy ^^

Yandere! Arkham! Harley Quinn Concept

(Primarily Arkham Knight)

Pairing: Platonic -> Romantic

Possible Trigger Warnings: Gender-Neutral Darling, Obsession, Stalking, Violence, Manipulation, Anger issues, Grief, Kidnapping, Drugging/Gassing, Breaking and entering, Forced companionship, Delusional behavior, Clingy behavior.

Harley could work as a romantic or platonic.

Like... as a platonic she seems like she'd be really bubbly and act like a friend.

A psychotic friend but... somewhat of a friend.

As a romantic she'd be about as obsessive with you as she would be with Joker.

One thing that Arkham/Injustice Harley share with each other is their independence from Joker.

It's just that they deal with it differently.

Injustice Harley becomes a hero after the death of Joker.

While Arkham Harley commits to crime in the name of Joker.

This version of Harley actually gets more insane at the passing of Joker instead of better.

Harley would be a very dangerous yandere in general, but this universe may just make her worse.

Her obsession with someone new most likely starts sometime around Arkham Knight if she sees you in a romantic sense.

If she sees you in a platonic sense I imagine it could be whenever but for now I'll focus on Arkham Knight.

Harley is a yandere who feels she needs to be dependent on her darling.

If she sees you as a friend/ally then she sticks around you as she feels you'll ease her through her grief.

Which is strange as if anyone else tries to ease her grief she snaps at them.

Here's some backstory between you, up until Arkham Knight.

The friend route would make more sense if you "knew" her when Joker was alive.

Harley no doubt first had platonic feelings towards you, that's how her yandere traits would start due to her being with Joker.

She stalks you for a bit then breaks into your home.

She acts like you two are friends and is really bubbly and overly excited towards you.

While you barely know anything about the crazed woman who keeps breaking into your home, she feels she knows everything about you from just watching you.

No doubt spills about you towards the Joker.

She tells him she's found a new friend and that they simply must be involved with their plans.

Your "friendship" with Harley is very one-sided.

She somehow manages to find you and even drags you with her places.

At least once you've been a hostage for one of her and Joker's plans.

The entire time she's acting like it's a fun thing for you two to do.

"Mr. J said I could bring you to meet him~ I bet we'll have so much fun!"

You did not.

Despite your fear and forced compliance, she trusts you and soon you may even get used to being a target of her strange obsession.

Hell, maybe soon you convince her you'll be her "friend" if she just visits and doesn't pull you into any of Joker's plans.

She agrees... and never leaves you alone.

You and Joker are the ones she loves the most.

So when she loses Joker, her beloved, she only has one other person to cling to.

While you contact the police and Batman of Harley's obsession towards you, Harley realizes she needs the comfort of her beloved friend.

It's at this point Harley can stay a platonic yandere or split into a romantic yandere.

Harley would hunt you down, even if you moved.

When she does? She'll send her goons to pick you up and drag her to her little base she's made for herself.

It disappoints her that you may no longer be in your old home, but she'll find you.

You don't need to hide from her!

The moment your conscious you look so confused.

Only to see Harley staring with a grin.

"Hey there! Been awhile, hasn't it? Safe to say I think I've missed you...."

Harley would use her darling as a coping mechanism.

Like an old friend, one you never wanted, she sobs and rants about the loss of Joker.

The whole time you're tied to a chair and hoping Batman comes fast enough.

Then over time she'd shift the topic of her rants to you.

She rambles to you about how you've always been there and how much fun you two have had in the past.

Then maybe the conversation dips into romantic territory... her mentioning how she feels things for you without even meaning to say it.

The idea of her having romantic feelings towards you strikes fear in your gut.

Unfortunately, it's not your say if she has romantic intentions with you or not.

If Harley continues to just see you as a friend then she plans on making you her second in command.

Even if she liked you as a crush she'd take a similar route, although it changes over time.

She's physically clingy and often wants her darling beside her.

Harley would also find some sort of "fun" nickname to call you all the time, smiling the whole time.

If Harley held romantic feelings towards you... imagine if she tried to make you her new "Joker" in this universe?

She may try to get her hands on Joker blood, gas, or even some chemicals to force you into her new love.

Oh, Puddin'... you may be unwilling now, but she'll show you that you can be wonderful for each other.

Harley in this universe truly can't forget about her Joker.

She also adores you.

Why should she have to choose between the two of you?

Why doesn't she just have both?

Harley in this universe definitely seems like she'd brainwash and drug you into the next Joker.

The moment she sees traits of him in you melded with your normal personality, she's in love.

Ohhh, now she has you both!

She's never been happier!

While you're panicking as your personality feels split due to Joker... Harley is holding you and kissing you with happy giggles.

"Oh you're everything and everyone I love! Now I have you both once again... we... I can be happy again!"

By this point something is telling you to reciprocate the affection but you struggle with what to do.

Harley becomes fully dependent on you after this, simply happy she has her two loves in one.

Maybe you'll even let the whole Joker personality take over?

Then you'll be a ruler of crime.

This isn't a life you wanted.

But as the Joker's presence within you grows... you begin to enjoy it.

Then maybe you'll begin to reciprocate Harley's feelings.

Then you'll be everything she's ever wanted.

"I love you, Puddin'...!"

#yandere dc #yandere dc villains #yandere arkhamverse #yandere dc arkhamverse #yandere harley quinn #yandere arkhamverse harley quinn #yandere arkham knight

[choclatecoveredlove]

“Pumpkins!!”

sorry for forgetting about tumblr lol,,

synopsis: carving pumpkins with the dormleaders

dormleaders x reader

Riddle

wait let him just check that it comply with all the rules

luckily it does

he’s still kinda hesitant tho thinking about what his mother would say

but he pushes away the thought seeing how excited you are

riddle honestly sucks at carving, he get the insides everywhere and carves a really unsettling face which he intended to be cute

he carves like 10 more pumpkins until he makes a halfway decent one (he just wants to impress you!!)

he ends up having a lot of fun!! it’s one of his favorite activities!!

“Darling look at this one! Do you like it? It’s definitely the best one so far! Not better than yours though.”

Leona

you woke him up from his nap for this???

he rolls back over and ignores you

you will have to drag him and beg him to get him to even touch the pumpkin

eventually he gives in and puts a little effort into carving a pumpkin

it’s really really basic and he made a huge mess that poor ruggie will have to clean up, but hey, he did it!

now you gotta make it up to him with cuddles

“Can’t believe you woke me up for this. You’re definitely gonna make it up to me later..”

Azul

he does not like the mess

but he trusts the process

but he’s honestly really good at it though!!

he doesn’t talk during the whole process bc he’s concentrating, he’s gotta get it perfect!!

does pretty, intricate designs which he displays around the lounge!!

floyd broke one of his pumpkins and azul tried to kill him

azul has still not forgiven him

“Hmm… okay done. What do you think? Thank you, I think i’ll put this one by the bar.”

Kalim

you came to the right man!!

he’s so pumped!!!

he’s never actually done it himself before, servants were the one who decorated for him

he makes such a mess (poor, poor jamil) but he’s having fun so it’s okay!!

he’s carvings are a little weird looking but over all they’re very cute!!

he keeps the seeds so jamil can cook them and they can be a snack for later

“ This was so fun!!! Can we do it again some time?”

Vil

he’s kinda hesitant

like he wants to because he knows it’ll make you happy but also,, messy :/

eventually he caves and does it anyway because he cares about you more than a little mess

he makes such pretty ones!! they’re carved with flowers and hearts and one with a poison apple

he surprisingly doesn’t make that big of a mess (especially compared to kalim and leona lol)

he gives them to you to help decorate ramshackle with because you have no decorations

“What do you think beloved? Thank you, you can have it. Perhaps it will make ramshackle look more festive.”

Idia

he doesn’t understand the appeal

he would rather just make you a mechanical jack o lantern then actually touching a living thing and making a mess

but ortho tells him he’ll have fun so he begrudgingly goes along with it, complaining the whole time

he, unsurprisingly, is pretty good at it (and he knows it)

like leona, idia also makes you make it up to him afterwards through both video games and cuddles

“Ughhh I wanna go back to my room already.. can’t believe both of you talked me into this.”

Malleus

OVERJOYED you asked him to do this with you!!

malleus honestly doesn’t care if he makes a mess as long as he ends up with a good final result

btw he is a MASTER at pumpkin carving!!

he makes like whole scenes with shading and stuff

he also decides to carve his fellow dorm members, which he gives them as presents (sebek bawled his eyes out when he saw his)

he also carves you with like extreme detail but he doesn’t give it to you, it’s for his eyes only

“Thank you again for inviting me to join you, love. I hope we get to do this together again next halloween.”

#still have 13 matchups sitting in my drafts #smh #twisted wonderland x reader #twst x reader #riddle rosehearts x reader #leona kingscholar x reader #azul ashengrotto x reader #kalim al asim x reader #vil schoenheit x reader #idia shroud x reader #malleus draconia x reader

[peachymilkandcream]

My Husband, My Monster|Part 9|William Afton x Wife!Reader

(A/N: We're getting closer and closer to the end of this series, I'm still not sure how many chapters it will end up being but for now we'll keep pressing forward! Hope you enjoy and comment to be added to the taglist!)

WARNINGS: noncon, dubcon, manipulation, domestic abuse, yandere themes, forced marriage, forced pregnancy, stockholm syndrome, violence, mind breaking, misogyny, etc.

============================================

Thankfully the next funeral William had to go to wasn't that of someone he cared for. Now it was Henry's turn to feel the pain and loss he had, poor little Charlie, dumped in the alley, strangled but with no suspects to be found. What a sob story. But when his child died the world didn't care for the innocent life snatched away too soon, no they cared about the chance to drag down his name and his life's work. My how different they were.

Granted it had been William's own fault, his drunk escapades rendered him useless to think. Therefore Henry found the body before he could bury in launch an investigation. So far he couldn't be linked to anything, the cameras outside of the building had always been sketchy at best. And it could have been any old tie that killed her, his was normal enough if they found any fibers it couldn't be linked to him. He was free. Although he couldn't shake the uneasy feeling that Henry suspected it was him. Their relationship was never good, but now it was on a new low. Glares and whispers replaced civil conversation, they were both biding their time.

============================================

Months passed, Charlie's death had been officially branded a tragic random act of violence and the case was closed. Law enforcement after some time give up when it's not an open and shut case. Millions of tax dollars for this kind of justice. William didn't mind, lazy cops meant more fun for him.

His home life had never been better. His beloved wife was developing nicely, and she seemed to have come around to his behavior. She let him control more and more aspects of her life, where she went, how she dressed. The list went on and on. Her showing pregnancy also helped to limit the amount of time outside the house she could spend. And since his true personality of absentee husband did nothing to control her moods his newest role as caring husband who dotes on his pregnant wife seemed to work wonders on her pliable mind.

His son was still a handful, haunted by what he had done to his brother. Michael had gotten into a habit of sneaking out to find distance from the space that once held his younger sibling, it was driving his mother sick with worry. With a child on the way the less stress the better, so William agreed he would talk to the boy and try to ease his guilt. Trips to the now closed diner that killed his brother had it's intended effect. Michael, seeing the dried bloodstains and rotting animatronics plagued his mind with nightmares. Nightmares that they were coming after him now, William could hear him crying in his room with terror, lights left on so they couldn't come to get him. He learned to stay indoors in the dark.

The Afton family was growing and thriving, William had intended for them to forget at least a little of their recent loss, he wanted to be the bearer of their sorrows, so they would love him as much as he loved himself. They were flying high and nothing could bring them down.

==============================================

"Scrapping Spring Bonnie?" The outrage was impossible to conceal in his voice. "That was my character, he's what started this whole business!"

"We already have another Bonnie, so your suit doesn't fit William." Henry didn't even give him the decency of eye contact.

"Then he can be a floor animatronic, you can't just get rid of the original mascot-"

"To tell you the truth William parents are afraid of it, since that suit and Fredbear had the same mechanical system parents are hesitant to bring their kids near so there's not a repeat of the accident."

"My son has a name, Henry. He's not just "the accident"."

Henry holds his hands up calmly and apologetically. "Alright, I'm sorry. What tragically happened to Evan makes parent's warry to trust our animatronics."

"The kids loved it!"

"True but they can't if they're not coming since parents are so concerned."

"So what, I'll just hide away in my office like you from now on?"

Henry scratches the back of his head. "About that-"

"You're joking-"

"Listen William, out on the floor your behavior is...eccentric. And I think it's too much for the kids."

"I'm a partner to this company shouldn't I have a say what I do?"

"Technically William I own most of it. I could buy out your shares in an instant."

"So you get to push me around."

"I hate that you word it like that but yes."

William scoffs. "I can't believe you."

"Believe what you want." He turns around in his chair. "I'll expect that suit to be in parts and repairs by the end of the day."

William storms out, fuming with rage. How dare he? He was just reacting to his dead brat. Children mean so much to him yeah? Well lets see what he'll do next. For weeks that insatiable thirst for blood plagued his every sense. No longer. He'd oblige that craving, indulge that urge. If William couldn't run the restaurant like he wanted, he'd burn it to the ground.

============================================

Choosing the victim wasn't hard. Birthday parties at the Pizzeria always meant a lot of commotion and confusion, the little blonde girl just happened to be all on her own. He recognized her, Henry had given the girl and her family permission to hang up missing dog posters in the door window since he cared so deeply about children's happiness. The stupid girl even gave him bait with which to lure her into the backrooms.

Henry wasn't here today, no one would notice the security cameras being tampered with. They wouldn't see him putting on his favorite suit since the parts and service camera busted months ago. It felt like home, smelled like home. He remembered the first time showing his wife his disguise and how she had laughed at "how adorable he was". Now she was at home caring for their newly born Vanessa, probably hoping he had a good day. Good, he had become very fond of the woman he vowed to spend eternity with. He'd hate to lose her over something like this.

================================================

His approach started subtly, just another mascot approaching a seemingly depressed child to cheer her up. He put on his best cartoon voice and offered her a balloon animal dog.

"Hey there miss, I couldn't help but notice your frown. What's wrong? Parties are no fun if you're sad." It was corny and made him cringe, but it always had a response with the kids.

"My dog, he's missing."

"Aw, well I am so sorry to hear that. But wait, is that your dog in that poster?" He points, a part of him wishing this was over so he could at least talk like an adult.

She nods, making him grin under the mask. "Good news! I think I saw that same dog in the back of the Pizzeria."

The way her eyes light up almost causes him to laugh, so gullible and naïve. Believing everything anyone says, she almost deserves it coming. "Really!?"

"Come with me!" He offers his large hand, having her take it as he slowly and surely leads her into the parts and service room, keeping his grin hidden and excitement in check.

Once there in the dark she looks around curiously, waiting for her dog to jump out of nowhere. When it didn't happen she looked up at him confused. "Mister, where is my dog?"

The knife plunging into her stomach severed all further questions. Her mouth hung agape in shock and horror as he repeated the action again and again. Not stopping until he was satisfied with his work.

When he was finished, a smile carved into her face, a wave of panic washed over him. What now? What about the body? Where wouldn't they look? He couldn't get lucky a second time.

His thoughts raced and raced until he spotted Chica, in for some routine maintenance with her chest cavity wide open. Perfect for a little girl.

With the body carefully hidden, William allowed himself a chance to enjoy his work and to revel in what he'd done. Nothing beat a high like this, he had to keep chasing it. But what could he do in this moment? Another kill would be too hasty.

His thoughts wandered until they finally came to his wife, knowing that she would be willing to feed until this high wasn't enough anymore and he needed his next rush. And then the one after this.

William stared at all of the parts and machines around him, Henry's pride and joy.

"Just think old friend." He said to the silence. "Now your precious machines are as corrupted and foul on the inside as you."

Tags:

===========

@fandomreader @n3r0-1417 @2pacl0ve

#my husband my monster #william afton x reader #william afton x you #william afton x oc #william afton smut #william afton #steve raglan x oc #steve raglan x you #steve raglan smut #steve raglan x reader #steve raglan #five nights at freddys #five nights at freddy's #fnaf movie #fnaf

[buddhamethods]

10 BL Characters I Want Carnally

AKA I'm just a person with two keen eyes and dubious morals when it comes to enjoying media so don't take it seriously, I'm here for a good time.

Thank you @sndrys for tagging me! This was an eye opening experience putting this together. As it turns out I might have a type (ew).

1) Guy from Bake Me Please (2023)

The sole reason for me creating this list! Look, I dropped Bake Me Please almost immediately because it just wasn't for me BUT I've been lowkey watching through my dash. And let me tell you, my fingers gain consciousness and hit reblog everytime this baby's face pops up because...well...LOOK AT HIM. He is beautiful and he should get the guy (hehe get it) in the end idc.

2) Yok from Not Me (2021)

Yok is such a beloved character and for good reason! He is sexy, he is gay, he sets buildings on fire and steals cops' wallets on accident because HOW WAS HE SUPPOSED TO KNOW THAT GUY HE WAS STALKING WAS A COP??? I love you Yok, never change.

3) Palm from Never Let Me Go/ OurSkyy2 (2022-23)

The anger I felt for all the injustice and mistreatment our beautiful Palm had to face in this show took literal years off my life. It's rare for me to get this passionately protective over a character and yet here we are, in the Palm Protection Squad headquarters. Even Nueng is on the watchlist!

4) Tonhon from Tonhon Chonlatee (2020)

Not to out myself as an enjoyer of silly goofy times , but I did have fun watching Fish Upon The Sky and Secret Crush On You, so OFCOURSE I thought I would like this one too but GOD was it rough. Did I still finish it? Yes. Did I fawn over PoddKhao pairing and have been quietly praying for some kind of reunion ever since? Also yes. Was I foaming at the mouth barking everytime Tonhon AKA Podd was on my screen? I'm not gonna comment without lawyer present.

5) Tew from My Dear Gangster Oppa (2023)

Speaking of Tonhon Chonlatee...AH! Ai Long Nhai (TC's spiritual prequel of sorts) was sure...something. And by something I mean I saw Meen and decided I will never speak ill of men ever again, feminism quite literally left my body. And then a year later My Dear Gangster Oppa came out and guess what??! MEEN IS THE GANGSTER OPPA! Dreams really do come true, kids.

6) Wen from Moonlight Chicken (2023)

(or Tian from ATOATS or Mueang Nan fron FUTS). Mix...I will eat you. Always so dewy and healthy and sparkly-eyed. But Wen from Moonlight Chicken is something out of the realm of my imagination. The sex appeal? The maturity?? The gentleness??!! Somebody sedate me before I say something I will not be able to justify in court.

7) Vee from Love Mechanics (2022)

He is a pretty bisexual who makes the most abhorrent stupid decisions known to men and then weeps and suffers for them WHAT MORE DO YOU NEED? Once again, is the show flawless or even remotely coherent? Absolutely not. That being said Vee brought me so much joy by being stupid I'm forever grateful.

(also YinWar are so back GO WATCH JACK AND JOKER TRAILER)

8) Prapai from Love In The Air (2022)

To a certain extent I've enjoyed every MAME show I've watched. To do that you need to possess the rare ability called "I abandoned every shred of moral integrity to gawk at hot men". And Prapai? MAN is this bitch hot. Tall dark handsome? Check! Bisexual on a bike? Check! Stubborn and annoying? CHECK!

9) Xiang Hao Ting from HIStory3: Make Our Days Count (2019)

*incoherent wailing and sobbing* IM NOT EXPLAINING SHIT ABOUT HIM LEAVE ME ALONE

10) AlanJeff from Pit Babe (2023)

My newest obsession! I refuse to separate our local senior citizen and his favorite prophetic mechanic. Both of them are hot as shit in their own way. Alan is a sexy dilf with so much weight and responsibility on his shoulders it's a miracle he retained his optimism and youthful awkwardness. And Jeff is a prickly baby-cow-baby-deer eyed baby that is so touch starved it's actually a little funny. SO I GUESS ALANJEFF SANDWICH IT IS.

(don't be shy tag yourselves besties <3)

#tag game #bake me please #bake me please the series #not me #not me the series #never let me go #never let me go the series #my dear gangster oppa #my dear gangster oppa the series #moonlight chicken #history 3: make our days count #pit babe #pit babe the series #love mechanics #tonhon chonlatee #love in the air #love in the air the series #blacked out and tagged every show oops

[resident-gay-bitch]

kinda a niche au concept but i think a lot of people will get it but also it’s so random lol: corroded coffin friendship / steddie / buckingham / more lol

okay, my dad watches car shows all the time like the car sos shit, and i don’t really like them, but i’ve always enjoyed one: Counting Cars. the main mechanic is like a metalhead and they’re all kinda punky and alternative and just a bunch of metalhead dads pimping out old cars and shit.

henceforth, the au idea: how are you seeing how our beloved eddie might fit into this?

SO say CC got big enough to be known kinda western globally or whatever, maybe bigger idk i don’t care but anyway. maybe they were a one hit wonder in the 80/90’s or whatever.

but they stopped playing because they all kinda wanted to settle down and stop partying and wanted to buy houses and not have to tour all the time or whatever right. say gareth met a girl and got married to her and they had a kid on the way, jeff and grant wanted to settle down and live a cosy steady life together, eddie was just so fucking tired of being front man idol or whatver. and they all just wanted to get back into the mechanic shop - maybe they all apprenticed at thatcher tyers or whatever in hawkins when they were younger.

whatever the reason, they’re ex-famous band who are pretty ficking rich and love working on cars and shit. so they open a shop and start fixing up cars. they get a lot of rapport because of their name; the shops called corroded cars or something similar to the band name. eddie runs the place because it’s mostly his passion and he impulse bought the shop himself whilst drunk one night and then they were all just like okay yeah let’s do this lol.

maybe one night they’re all chilling at gareth’s place for “family” dinner and after dinner they’re just watching telly and a car show comes on and then they get the idea to start a show!!! so they do!!!

eddie’s the main guy, obviously. he’s always been the drama queen confident one so he runs it all, and it’s His shop anyway. eddie is the idiotic, loveable, idiot but he’s also just a cool down to earth alternative guy who headbangs whilst working on engines and REFUSES to cut his hair.

i think jeff would be the head painter, graphic artist,. i feel such an arty vibe from him ya know? i think that would be his area of expertise. the audience would love his general calm vibe but also adore how easily he puts everyone in their place in a second and is so secretly sassy.

i think argyle would be the airbrush guy and also works in paint / design. he’s Definitely not always high and is just funny like that… definitely. his niche opinions and random curiosities keep the audience captivated.

gareth would be the detailer i think. he’s got a sort of perfectionist vibe and he’d always have a go when eddie brings in a car or a bike he’s just been fixing the motor of or whatever and there’s grease stains all over the doors and shit. the audience would love their banter.

grant would be the bike shop manager, he’s got a strong interest in motorbikes and that’s his area of expertise. he’ll spend hours perfecting one part of the body of a bike and eddie adores his dedication every fuckinf time.

jonothan would be the tech guy. he finds ways to update old cars to help them run smoothly whilst feeling authentic in the drive. some of the tech he pulls out is next level and everyone in the shop will spend an entire episode gushing about this one feature in a car he added that makes it feel like a spy car or something.

Nancy!! she’d be the behind the scenes manager. eddie hired her about one month into the buisiness when he realised none of the CC guys could / or wanted to do the books and shit. she’s smart as hell and a total hard ass when it comes to their aloof attitude and carelessness, but she’s also good fun and a total girlboss. eddie relies on her to keep the shop afloat, he’d be lost without her. she’s a fan favorite because she’s the only one who can attempt to put eddie in his place and acctually succeed. anyone goes and tells eddie he needs to think about the budget before he goes spending, he won’t even listen, she gives him one look and tells him no and suddenly he’s sheepish and nodding and walking away like a child who was told they can’t have a cookie. she’s in charge of all the books / finance / accounts / all that stuff!

(also, people are having a hard time figuring out if she’s dating john or argyle, or weather those guys are dating eachotjer, or if they’re all dating, or if None of them are dating)

Chrissy!! she’s adorable. a total fan favorite. she’s their receptionist and is currently taking an engineering course part time in college, finally taking the initiative to do something She actually wants to do. her sweet demeanour pulls customers and watchers in, and her determined attitude is what makes them stay. she’s like pure sugar, but so insanely smart. sometimes she’ll come and watch everyone as they work and if it’s not busy they’ll teach her different things and let her try. everyone loves the episodes where chrissy gets to try and fix things or paint things or learn things!

ROBIN!!! my girl! ugh! she’s TOTALLY an iconic mean lesbian okay. she’s always got banter with the guys, and she’s so cool calm and clllected, insulting them all the time. the girls in the audience go crazy when she’s onscreen in just a wife beater tank and got them gay girl muscles out! she works close with eddie on motors and shit but she’s also the project scout. she looks for new things for them to try and brings these ideas / cars / bikes / whatever else over to eddie to get out into the show! but the audience loves her even more when they see her totally awkward dorky side come out the first episode where chrissy comes over and watches robin work. they’ve never seen robin drop a spanner so much! chrissy is the only one who can fluster robin like that. the audience is rooting for their romance.

and the steddie! so robins totally uber rich best friend likes collecting old cars. and she’s been trying to get him on the show for a while because he has Such cool cars but he’s never needed fixing or pimping. until he goes and buys another one and it just won’t run and it’s all beaten down but he just HAD to buy it because it was his dream car as a little kid or something. so he comes on the show with his car and - well, the main reason he’s been avoiding it because he actually used to crush on lead guitarist and vocalist eddie munson back in the 90’s - eddie obviously being the face of the show greets him with nancy and robin and they talk about his car and eddie gets Flustered!

robin has a totally hot best friend whos So ficking queer And knows heaps about cars and is standing so close, shoulders touching with eddie as he shows pictures of his collection on his phone and eddie pretends he’s looking at the cars and not steve’s ring adorned hands.

steve is also highly protective of his cars and so he hangs around whilst they work on his ride. he and robin are so chatty and bitchy together and the audience love it. and eddie can’t stop Staring!!

by episode three of steve being featured in it people are posting shit trying to notify steve and robin that eddie is so gay for steve!

and then steve’s car is done and done and then he leaves the show. and then a couple of episodes later robin approaches eddie and whispers - but the cameras are right there - to eddie asking if he has been perving on her best friend and it’s So funny to everyone cause eddie’s kinda terrified and she’s threading to burry him alive if he hurts her steve and- eddie goes red when he realises that robin just confirmed he had a chance with steve.

anyway. suddenly steve has Many more appearances on the show :)

and obviously robin and chrissy get together!!’

and no one ever finds out about the love triangle between nancy jon and argyle (they’re all polly)

anyway. i just think that’s cute.

#fic idea #steddie au #mechanic eddie #buckingham #corroded coffin #fluff #counting cars #modern au #eddie munson #stranger things #steddie #stranger things 4 #jay writes #jay talks #steve harrington #robin buckley #jeff stranger things #grant stranger things #gareth emerson #nancy wheeler #chrissy cunningham #jonothan byers #argyle stranger things #mechanic robin #rockstar eddie #car guy steve #car guy eddie

[mooshs-crack-headcanons]

My go to plan as soon as I get totk:

Get through the tutorial area (probably in the sky then need to get back on to the surface)

Go to hateno. See if the zelink living in the hateno house together fanfics were real.

Check out something specific relating to the art book leak. (Not describing or sharing the leak so don't worry about spoilers from me! :)

Find a horse that at least looks like the one I had in breath of the wild, my beloved baby boy Romeo who can do and hasn't done nothing wrong ever in the entire 6 years of his life (he kicked me off a cliff four separate times):

Go to Gerudo desert because out of all regions it's the one I'm the most interested in seeing the state of post Ganondorf resurrection(?) murderous pissy fit.

I'm going to build me a big fuck off Zonai tractor.

Zelda. I need to know if she's alright, I would like to find out this earlier on but that's probably going to be found out through story and I really do want to take my time with it.

I need to see what the hell is happening with this korok with a backpack:

Speaking of the koroks, uhm... korok forest is gone. I definitely want to check that out. (Sorry this picture so so fucking blurry with how it's zoomed in but the forests gone)

I need to find out if I can glue two Royal claymores together (or an equivalent) to make a big fuck off abomination claymore that does double claymore damage that looks like this:

Go back to eventide. I wonder if they added something there. It seems like something thats a no brainer to do.

Check out what the fuck is going on with the labyrinths I can't find the screenshots now but I remember seeing some of them floating with the sky islands at some point.

If if I can find a sky island resembling at least a little bit of skyloft. I feel it in my bones that Nintendo would pull that type of shit. Or not because this is also Nintendo.

Documenting literally every even hint of a zelink moment in the entire game so I can make several posts gushing over it in the future.

Take lots of screenshots! I actually played breath of the wild on wii u and never on switch so of course I never really had that screenshot or recording capability so I finally can really go all out in this game.

The dragon that is 10000% a fucking Gleeok on the bridge of Hylia I've already determined is going to be the first overworld boss I fight. 🙂 I can't wait to fight it with only five or so hearts 🙂

Amd finally since amiibo support is confirmed and costumes are too - the artbook actually confirmed it but I don't really think that's a spoiler because it's a very obvious mechanic to bring back than just having them be used once only for the paraglider skins you get that was officially confirmed here below so I can't wait to get my ocarina of time and twilight princess gear back that I can wear for the whole game!

Over all I just really want to have fun in this game and really it looks like it's going to deliver. I can't wait to sink hundreds if not thousands of hours into and I REALLY REALLY hope it can at least fix a lot of it's predecessors issues, especially with how it executes it's story. I keep saying it, breath of the wild *had* the potential to be one of the best zelda stories ever but it was done so extremely poorly trying to tell it, majority of it is just ruined. I sincerely hope Nintendo has learned their lesson from that and actually let the Link/you the player actually play throughand experience the games narrative instead of just... having it exposition dumped onto you over and over in flashback cutscenes as stuff that's already happened and can't be changed. I went having this game with very low confidence it was first revealed in 2019, but the more and more I keep seeing it now the higher my optimism gets and I actually genuinely hope this game is really good.

I'm actually wishing the best for it and desperately hope it doesn't disappoint. We've all waited so long, and now we have only a little bit more to go.

#the legend of zelda #the legend of zelda tears of the kingdom #tears of the kingdom #zelink #moosh gives his dumb opinions #moosh's shitty edits #moosh's screenshots #non request related

[tiredlilguy]

The Flags Origin's HC's

because I think about them a lot. there's probably some things that don't make sense here, or rather "out there" takes, but since the Flags are all squished into 70 pages let me have this... also it's hc's, so all in good fun ^^ (chew on this while i continue working on requests in the mean time), also sorry this is kinda angsty

also if you want to see my other hc's then look here

Pianoman (my beloved):

came from a family who was already Mafia, his parents and the generation before them and so on so forth, were Mafia

wore a family ring that the oldest child wears as a symbol of his families dedication to the Mafia

sort of think of it like a generation by generation kind of deal: the oldest has to take up the "family business"

his family had different specialties in what they did, Pianoman specifically became an artisan in crafting supernotes, but his family all had their own different talents

because of his success of almost becoming a mafia executive, his parents chose to retire peacefully and take care of all of his younger siblings

his parents can retire peacefully out of respect with no harm because their legacy is so well-respected

he's the oldest in his family, since birth had to deal with the pressures of "being the oldest", which made him a perfectionist in his own craft

100% Japanese, mainly because the family just deals with generational upbringing; though if he married someone of a different ethnicity that was in the Port Mafia, then that wouldn't be a problem so long as his spouse is PM

when he died, the second oldest took his place, but not for a while because his family heavily grieved his death (but because of their legacy, still tried to make up for their loss)

Lippman:

was a child actor, spent a lot of time away from his family to do films/work on sets/etc.

his affiliation with the Mafia didn't happen until way later in his acting career

had a back alley deal with a man that involved blackmail in order for his cooperation - was saught out because he was so good with words (the Mafia found out he wrote a few of the screenplays himself)

could not hold a gun up until after his first year of being with the Mafia, was Pianoman's partner until The Flags were formed

half European, has an older sister; when his family found out he was Mafia, they sort of distanced themselves from him

often treats Chuuya like his own brother sometimes because of his situation with his family

when he died, his family didn't bother to attend the funeral; but one day upon visiting Japan, his older sister visited his grave and left a note

the clean up after his death was a mess... the Port Mafia was accused of killing him and Chuuya had to witness crowds of people false-blaming him for his own friends death

Iceman:

Italian, grew up in a Mafia family in Italy (his father was the don), but was considered the weakest link

still though, his family cared for him very deeply, and despite being Mafia, he always tried to do the right thing (didn't kill until he was with the PM)

at a younger age, he was more of an observer; would witness how his family/the people that worked for his family worked technique wise

his family actually didn't want him to be a mafioso, and was glad to know that he didn't have any particular interest in it either (they wanted him to live a normal life as a citizen)

one night, his home was bombed and his family, friends, coworkers all died in the explosion; he was the only survivor

was being hunted down because he was the only survivor, snuck into Yokohama and made a deal with a man to join the Port Mafia

(this is already in my previous hc's but) after the explosion, his ears were permanently damaged and he's slowly growing deaf: was teaching the flags sign language

he was really happy with The Flags, and at that point when they were fully established, he knew that if he was going to die, it'd be around them

Albatross:

Blasian; grew up in an average family, but he himself got interested in mechanics at a young age

his family didn't approve of his interests, saying that it was rather dangerous, but his father always indulged him

dad is a retired air-pilot and used to teach Alb a lot of what he now knows

in high school, had a job as a mechanic, but told his parents he worked in a library (they did not believe him, but they also didn't bother to check either); he also had pretty bad grades

the mechanic he was working for happened to be with the PM and offered Alb a job as his apprentice for a much higher pay

his mentor was getting quite old and wanted to retire, offered the job to Alb because he saw the potential that Alb had and wanted him to succeed

his mentor was sadly assassinated during a job, and so Alb became the Mafia's wheelman

Alb covered all of this up by confessing that he was a mechanic (but didn't tell them he was with the Mafia) and then got promoted to working for the government

when he died, his parents had to sort of bit by bit discover everything that was going on behind their backs (but they couldn't be mad)

Doc:

grew up in an orphanage and is completely unaware of his own family origins, but he's Japanese

was the orphanage nurses assistant and would often observe how injuries worked; eventually started taking care of his peers injuries himself

did quite well in the schooling that the orphanage taught, and they offered for him to take a test to go to med school (he succeeded)

had his normal doctor school in Japan at age 18, then after that was offered a full scholarship in North America to get his doctorate (we already know he graduated top of his class)

is not actually interested in God and if anything, wants to spite him: that stared his need to save people, but somehow ended up killing a few on the way (though not being caught)

when he came back to Japan to go find a job, he got a deal with the Mafia and took it because he thought "well, there's a lot of death in the criminal underground... so, yeah"

when he died, Chuuya didn't think anyone would come to visit, but upon visiting their graves the next day: he found piles of bouquets of flowers from the orphanage and his fellow classmates from the US

#enjoy the partial angst :( #bsd the flags #bsd hcs #bsd heacanons #bungou stray dogs #bungou stray dogs heacanons #pianoman bsd #lippman bsd #albatross bsd #doc bsd #iceman bsd #the flags bsd #bsd stormbringer #stormbringer #mono writes

[sehtoast]

The Art of Worship (Homelander x OC Smut)

18+ | 2.6k words | Webweaver, gore, dismemberment, display of a corpse, blood, face fucking, choking, rooftop sex, p in v sex, blood as lube -- yes, you read that right, multiple orgasms, Homelander is his own warning, spidersona oc | Fic Directory

Homelander was fucking furious. 

Rage and indignance burned in his gut, igniting a flame that scorched anyone and everyone that dared cross his path or, worse yet, cross him outright. 

The only person safe from him was Benjamin.  His sweet little Benjamin. So calm and collected, patient and kind in the face of this– this slight.  This brazen fucking insult. 

Vought wanted publicity. Demanded it. Spectacles and events, mountains of money, free advertising from all the social media hype. Of course they'd want to pit their beloved Spider-Man against Webweaver, just as they'd done with A-Train and Shockwave. There was money to be made. They’d dangle his precious little spider over a lion’s jaw for a penny if the opportunity came about.  What did he expect?

They were to have a bundle of competitions, each one specially designed to determine who was the better Spider. 

Who was more fit for The Seven. 

Of course Homelander had gone nearly ballistic when he found out. 

Benjamin, though… He simply wasn’t taking it seriously.  Subject to rants and raves every morning and night as the competition neared, the bug simply always said, “It’ll be what it’ll be.”

But this couldn’t be.  Homelander wouldn’t fucking stand for it.  He didn’t believe for a second that the wall crawler would leave him were he to lose his place on the team, but to see someone else sit in his seat?  To tolerate some airheaded jackass, some cheap fucking knockoff thinking he was better in any capacity?  Absolutely not.

He wasn’t going to allow it.

He’d worked himself into a frenzy by the time he tackled his lover’s competitor out of the sky.  Completely consumed by rage, by fear and anxiety– but, more than anything, the burning need to protect.  He zips through the city, dragging Webweaver’s face across building after building, smearing pulp-like blood across the surfaces.  

“Did you really think,” he sneers, “I’d ever let someone like you into The Seven?  That I’d let you replace Spider-Man without putting my fucking foot down?”

He can hear the whimpering.  There’s still time to play, he decides, as he lands upon a skyscraper with two antenna towers that would be just perfect for what he had in mind.

He drags Webweaver’s limp form between the two, fiddling about with his hands and wrists to figure out how to fire his webs.

Imagine his surprise when it turns out to be a mechanism rather than the organic method by which Ben produces them.  No bodily-intent needed to make sure the webbing’s consistency and tension would be just right.

With a roll of his eyes, Homelander begins to craft his masterpiece.  He’s seen his little spider do this tons of times; so, really, how hard could it be?  He works, eventually deciding it’s far more convenient to remove Webweaver’s arm than to lug his dead weight around.

Once it’s perfect, he has his fun.  Picks him apart piece by painful piece, starting at the legs.  Webweaver is in and out of consciousness as Homelander dismembers him, but what fucking fun it was to see the look of horror on the face of the thorn in his side when he snapped that first length of bone and ripped his flesh clean off.  

“Like picking the legs off a bug,” he mocks.

Homelander mounts each limb in the web, creating a work of art piece by piece, topping it all off with a dripping, mangled, decapitated head.  He doesn’t even bother pulling the mask off– it’s shredded perfectly.  In his satisfaction of a job well done, he can’t help but feel his work of art is enough to rival Da Vinci’s Vitruvian Man.  Surely, after this, he’s an artist in his own right.

When he arrives home to find his Benjamin waiting on the couch, he has to stop the bug from attempting to drag him into the shower.

“It’s a surprise,” he tells Ben when the origin of the viscera is questioned.  “C’mon, I made you something!”

The look of abject horror on Ben’s face when they land on the rooftop tickles a mote of fear in his gut.  He’d done this just for his little spider.  Declared him the victor before the competitions could even begin.  Painted the city red just for him.

“D’you like it?”  He asks, the mixture of excitement and anxiety stirring in his gut.  “I did it for you.”

Ben’s chest rises and falls with each heavy breath.  He plucks at one of the tight strands of webbing, listening to the twanging vibration as he takes it all in.

At first he’s scared.  It’s like seeing an alternate version of himself in that web.  If things were different, would Homelander have done this to him?  He doubts it, but… somehow, some way, it stirs something in his core.

Homelander had killed– no, slaughtered a man for him.  It wasn’t even the first time John had killed for him, but this..?  This was something else entirely.  This was more than protection, more than retaliation.

It looked like a fucking offering to a beloved god from their most devout follower.  The care and creativity that had gone into it… Benjamin would be a liar if he said there wasn’t something alluring about the fact Homelander had done this.

In fact, the more he thought about it, the more his horror was replaced with something else entirely.  Something wicked.

He turns to Homelander, who stands there looking like a kicked puppy.  Ben had spent too long in thought, and his poor, darling Johnny began to feel rejected.

“John?”  He whispers, drawing his blood drenched lover’s gaze away from the ground.  “You did all this… for me?”

With big, blue, scared eyes, Homelander nods.

It’s as if Ben’s body moves on its own.  Each step forward barely registers, the hands rising to Homelander’s face are numb to sensation, cupping his cheeks as if they had a mind of their own.  Before he can even realize, Ben is leaning in to take Homelander in a searing kiss, gasping and breathing in lungfuls of the iron-laced air and each of John’s little breaths.

He can taste the blood on Homelander’s lips, and something sinister rears its head inside.

“You,” he gasps between kisses, tongue laving into John’s mouth for more, “are so…”

He backs Homelander up against one of the antenna towers, taking a fistful of his suit, other hand gripping his red-stained undercut to angle him deeper into the kiss.

“So fucking hot,” he breathes as they separate.  

A sick grin spreads across Homelander’s blood splattered face.  That swell of pride bubbles within him once more, particularly when he sees just how bloody his little spider’s lips had become from their kiss.  More than pride though, he feels himself twitch in his pants.

Benjamin looks gorgeous covered in that worthless fuck's blood.

He grips him by the jaw, pulling the web-head back in for another kiss, slipping his tongue between his lips.  Homelander takes him fiercely, overcome with a deep, desperate hunger that demands appreciation for his work of art.  

How goddamn thrilling to not hear a single complaint as he tore the t-shirt clean off Benjamin’s body.  He spins the bug, pressing his bare skin to the cold metal, relishing the opportunity to be had in his gasp.

He takes control. 

“Mine,” Homelander growls as he marks Benjamin with more blood.  He extends a hand, catching a few dribbles from the stray limbs above, moving back to claim his territory.

With a red right hand, he paints his name over Ben’s chest in big, bold letters.  The crimson blends with the leather of his glove, appearing as if his very essence was what smeared onto his little love bug.  He finishes it off with a bloody grip at Benjamin’s neck, leaving behind a perfect print.

“So, you like my handy-work, huh?” He smirks, trailing the tip of his nose up the corner of Ben’s jaw.  Homelander hears him gulp in response, feels those hands grasp at his forearms, and all he fucking wants is to put him on his knees and mmm… 

He has such delicious ideas in mind.

“Maybe you should show me how much you like it.”

The glint of excitement in Ben’s eyes doesn’t go unnoticed before the web-head is falling to his knees, just like he wanted.  What a fucking sight he was to behold, too.  The way he nuzzled against Homelander’s clothed cock before undoing his belt.  He mouths over it and, despite barely being able to feel it through the fabric and cup, John’s entire lower region twitches in excitement.

He sighs in relief when his cock meets the cool night time air, engulfed in heat near immediately as Benjamin swallows his length.  Throat training the boy had been the best decision in the world, truly.

“Ohhh…” Homelander leans his head back, stained hands threading through those unruly chestnut locks.  “That’s it– fuckin’ take it.”

John grinds into Ben’s mouth, burying himself deep and staying there until that hot, needy throat clamps down around his cock in a gag.

“Ah, ah, ah,” he tuts.  “Hold it.”  He hears the sound of Benjamin sputtering below.  Homelander looks down with a grin.  “Thaaaaat’s it, keep it in there.  Atta’boy, Benny.  My little spider– mine!”  Homelander pulls out to the tip, watching his precious Benjamin choke and gasp, grinning wickedly at the threads of saliva still connecting them.

He tips Ben’s head back to gaze up at him.

“I’m going to fuck that pretty mouth of yours, and you’re gonna behave yourself.”  He orders.  In the background, faint drips of blood can be heard splattering against the ground.  “Show me just how grateful you are that I saved your bacon, babe.”

Ben nods obediently before swallowing him once more.  Homelander swears he sees stars once that tongue swipes his tip, and galaxies as he sinks further inside.  He begins to thrust, hand directing Ben’s head with each motion to maximize his bliss.  

He really likes the sound his little spider makes every time the head of his cock beats the back of his throat.

“Fuckin’ whore,” he chuckles through his teeth.  “You couldn’t wait to suck my dick when you saw what I did for you– I just know it. You wanted to thank me so bad!”  

Homelander pushes in until Ben’s lips are wrapped around the base of his cock.  He holds there for a moment before setting a faster pace, thrusting blissfully into that hot, wet mouth that was just so perfect for him. 

“You wanted to get on your knees the second you saw it,” he continues. “You know I deserve this for protecting you. Fuck… suck that cock, baby.” 

He tilts the bug’s head back to rest against the metal frame, admiring the tears painting his cheeks and those gorgeous swollen lips.  When the hands gripping his thighs clench, he pats Ben’s cheek sweetly.

No, he thinks to himself. This is my masterpiece.

He gives his little spider ample opportunity to breathe once more as he pulls out, gripping his cock to smear spit and precum across his lovely little Benjamin’s face.  

Van Gogh only wishes his brushes stroked such beautiful swirls.

When that tongue juts out to beg for more, John wastes no time at all in burying himself all the way in one smooth motion.  This time, though, he leans down to grasp Ben's neck.  With a light squeeze, he’s overwhelming even himself– and yet he still fucks into that impossibly tight heat.

Ben’s eyes water even more, and he grips Homelander’s thighs with all of his might as he fights his gag reflex.  He can’t breathe, he can’t speak, and the hand squeezing his throat is pressing perfectly against his carotid arteries. 

His vision swims into blackness.  

Over the deafening thrums of his own heartbeat, Ben hears Homelander cry out his release, feels him thrust forward impossibly closer, pushing his head back against the metal frame with each motion.

“Good boy, good– ah!  Good fucking boy!”

He’s buried too deep to spare even a taste of come in Benjamin’s mouth, and the bug fights to not pass the fuck out from lack of oxygen.  By the time Homelander pulls out, Ben's almost confident he’s turned at least a few shades of purple if his desperate, heaving gulps of air were anything to go by.  He slumps onto his side before rolling onto his back, uncaring that he now lays in a puddle of his rival’s blood.

The sky is clear and the moon smiles back at him, but there’s no time to bask in it when his jeans and underwear are being dragged off his body by his voracious lover. 

Homelander spreads Ben’s legs with little patience before plunging into his cunt, groaning through clenched teeth as the soft, velvety walls practically pull him in.  Beneath him, Ben whines and squirms.

“Too mu– w-wait a sec!”

But he doesn’t care.  Not when that heat beckons him forth all the more and consumes him whole.  He ruts without care, fucking into his little spider like an animal.  Fuck, maybe that’s exactly what he was, all bloodstained, fangs bared, eyes swirling red in his frenzy.  Each snap of his hips caused them to slide around in the slick remains of Benjamin’s foe.

His little spider looked so fucking perfect in a halo of vengeance.

“Mine,” Homelander snarls, nails biting into the softness of Benjamin’s hips.  Below, his little spider whines and keens, eyes rolling back despite all of his attempts to steady his vision.  His pussy lips are parted like flower petals, and thrusts at just the right angle cause his swollen bud to slide against Homelander’s cock.  The more Benjamin writhes, the more blood stains his body.

He’s a sight to behold, especially once one of his slicked hands reaches between them to slide over the base of Homelander's cock.  Each stroke drags a little more of the thick liquid from his fingers and each glide of his cock becomes smoother until Homelander realizes just what his little love bug had done.

Benjamin used the fucking blood as lube.

A thought that, as soon as it fully manifested in Homelander’s mind, had him thrusting harsh and deep before spilling his load inside his lovely little Benjamin.

“Fuck–” he mewls, rutting through the waves, cock twitching with every little spurt.  “Oh fuck, fuck, fuck… You little fucking slut!”

Ben had hardly realized what he’d done.  In truth, he just wanted something to ease the friction.  Wet as he’d been, he just needed more– and, without that godsent bottle of lube usually within arm’s reach at home, he had to take what he could get.

By the time Ben opens his eyes, Homelander is engulfing him in a kiss that is far more tongue than lips, and he’s only able to whine once he feels his love start moving again.  This time, though, John is a little slower, a little more gentle.  Enough that Ben found himself falling over the edge of bliss without fear of being fucked through the roof.  As he came apart, so did Homelander.

Again, and again, and again. Each round requiring more and more of the crimson liquid to keep things comfortable.  

By the time they finished, the rooftop had dried and the corpse no longer dripped.  Both Ben’s clothes and John’s suit were completely ruined, but a naked journey home is much less humiliating when the sky is the path taken.  They looked like a scene straight out of a horror movie, drenched from head to toe in dried blood.

Homelander holds Benjamin tight in the shower.  Trails his fingertips over the bruises on his throat, on his hips and legs.  He wants to apologize, but he earned this.

Instead, he kisses him– softly, this time.

“I’m never letting you go.” He states firmly, as if that’s all the explanation he needs to give for everything he has or ever will do.  “I’m never fucking letting you go.”

Benjamin, on wobbly legs, leans his weight against his beloved Johnny.

“I love you, too.”

#homelander #homelander x oc #homelander fanfiction #homelander smut #the boys #antony starr #the boys fanfiction

[sucantslay]

Meiyuu Deshi Kairou analysis. I'm losing my sanity...

Hello @hypn0sssss, just wanna let you know, I've been working off my ass to research this song like...more than 30 minutes but then in turn into a whole week long.

It was fun though ( I really need a rest but my brain said just do it! )

BUT, ANYWAY, here are some important information you should know before getting into this song analysis.

If you don't know, this is an event song, it connects with an event story about a VR game, yes, a VR game. It was introduced to Mika by Makoto and Sora. And later on, became the inspiration for Mika's song.

This is related to Mika's character, so if you know nothing about him, you can learn more from some sources out there or have a quick check at my post

3 . I'll mostly put the lyrics in word form. I really want to put all the translation pictures here but since Tumblr stop me from having more than 10 pics in a post...I can only put some.

4 . Most of this is my personal analysis. Pls tell me or put on the sources if you want to put it somewhere. Also, since it is a PERSONAL thing, the lyrics might not mean like that to you, but it is to me. You are free to have your own idea of this song however you like.

Alright! Let's get started!!!

For the theme of the song, Mika is using the VR game as his base, so it understandable that some words might be a little lead into the mechanical aspect.

The story for this song is about a mechanical god who ends the story/ the world abruptly. It very interesting when the song did not only successfully portray the theme of mechanical but also the theme and story of Valkyrie itself.

Oh my dear Mika, you are really something of an artist, aren't ya?! It the time when Mika finally step up and going his own art more then waiting for Shu order!

The name of the song "Meikyuu Deshi Kairou" which means "Labyrinth Electronic Corridor"

With some lines mention classic songs

(this line got repeated 2 times)

"Ode to Joy" or in other words "An die Freude"

You must have known it as Beethoven's most significant work, Symphony No.9, a choral symphony.

Since the name isn't being written in another name until you start digging deeper, you'll find something eles, lies in these words they had chosen.

It was origin from a poem written by a German named Friedrich Schiller and was used by Beethoven in his Ninth Symphony.

But the version that Beethoven used is the revision of the poem. Yet Friedrich himself didn't like that version at all, he viewed it as a failure.

Why? Because Friedrich made that poem for his dear beloved ( longtime friend and partner ) Christian Gottfried Körner, who inspired him to write the poem.

He stayed "of value maybe for us two, but not for the world, nor for the art of poetry"

I SWEAR TO GOD, WHEN I READED THOUGH WORD, NO THING APPEAR IN MY MIND AS FAST AS MIKA AND SHU DID.

His performance and his dear partner in art. Did I mention that Friedrich made a whole verse for Christian on his birthday.

( uhm, ok, that's enough! Let's move to the next one for now before I can't keep this mouth shut. )

Some lines in the poem go like this:

"Rescue from the chains of tyrants, Magnanimity to the villain too, Hope on the deathbed, Mercy in the high (law) court, Even the dead shall live! Brothers, drink and agree (with me) That all sinners shall be forgiven And hell shall be no more."

The "Ode to Joy" old name was "Ode to Freedom" / "An die Freiheit"

Then there came "Libera me" ( "Deliver me" )

Which also has an interesting background related to the Catholic Church. "Libera me" originated from a song named "Office of the Dead" which had been sung as a service prayer for the death.

The text asks God to have mercy upon the deceased person at the Last Judgment.

And it fits the theme of the song well! Because as I said before, the song is about a god who wants to destroy the world in sudden.

So "Ode to Joy", "Libera me" can be seen as the voices of humans who denying the god choice, the choice to turn the world back to dust.

( Note: The line in the song is not being sung by Mika or Shu, but by voices in the background. It becomes more noticeable when considering the fact that none other Valkyrie songs have these "background voices" at all )

The next two lines both sing an indirectly about the old Valkyrie.

"Ah, the melody sinks into overwritten myths"

The old Valkyrie had been sunk down to the deep by the play of Fine.

"Come, it is the time to open the floating corridor that full of electrons"

But it was the story from a long time ago, now, we taking a different path, to the new corridor, a new path to the future yet we're still unable to predict. Accidentally we lead ourselves to the door of destruction. ( It can also be seen as the god in this play had opened the door of doom, ending the world in sudden )

Ah, yes, once again this song mentions the use of the classic poem.

This "Song of the Bell" had nothing to do with song or symphony, which gives us more clues and confirms the truth about "Ode to Joy".

Surprisingly, "Song of the Bell" is also been written by Friedrich Schiller.

"Ode to Joy" was written in 1785, while "Song of the Bell" was written in 1798.

The poem talks about the bell, how was the bell made, by what, and with what tools and techniques they used to make it.

I have a belief that the "love and punishment" part of the song lyrics has other means than taking from the "Song of the Bell". Yes, the poem did mention "love" as a part of the story where a couple has known each other since they were kid.

Wedding bell and allocation of roles is the part when the bell acts as a wedding bell.

To later on, mention death: Death knell upon the decease of the woman where the bell has an earnest purpose and tolls in accompaniment to a funeral

But there is no mention of crime or punishment.

So go back to the lyrics where they sing: "Reflect the song"

Reflect...which means there is a connection but not really is about the poem. It was more about Valkyris, the love had turned its back on them. Their art, their joy, their peaceful life as 3 small people in an unpopular Unit was now a punishment, pulling them down to the ground.

Nazuna left, Valkyrie broke, Shu is no longer himself.

To Mika, if not a punishment then what could this horrifying scene had been?

We can also see this in the human's eyes. If "Ode to Joy", "Libera me" was all human ( in the theme ) talking about, then this line is the begging for the god to rethink his decision:

"Please, don't you see, this beautiful planet is our everything. Is our beginning and our ending. We may suffer, but we are happy, and that makes living a meaningful thing."

noticed how Mika uses "Each other" not just "Other" which points to both Shu and Mika.

In their era of being a "not so happy" unit since the war ended.

They have gone so far and now look back at themself. Such action of shame, the days when we are still nothing but a nameless Valkyrie.

You can also look at it in the MV theme way: ''I wish this world would disappear.'' As the god of mechanical no longer feels the need of humans exiting.

As the next lyrics go:

"Behind this veil of anonymity" (Shu line)

"The ghosts of the dead-" (Mika line)

"Are dancing in the underground till the end of the trial" (Shu line)

There are two things I need to point out in detail here:

Firstly: The meaning of these lines seems to me as if they're talking about their trauma. Behind this veil is the old time, the old ghosts, look, they are all here, never left until we start open up with them. Until we learn how to heal ourselves from the brutal injury of war did we be able to make them leave

Secondly: Mika once again mentions death. It was Mika's own thing, if you don't know, death kinda became a thing that fond with Mika's style. Lots of times, we can see Mika associated with death ( mostly in the old song. )

In his 'In the Shadow' outfit, which had a deep connection with butterflies.

Butterflies are a symbol of the representative soul of a deceased person. In that outfit, Mika is represented by a blue butterfly, what was the meaning of that symbol?

A symbol of the soul who passed is nearby!

So, by now you would be questioning: "Why are there so many signs about death from Mika?" Well, glad you asked.

This all came down to the fact that Mika was being a doll in Valkyrie. Nazuna was also a doll himself, but he break free and Mika didn't.

Mika is dying from the inside, becoming the soulless, as he loses what support to belong to him. He sells it away, sacrifice it for the wish of making Valkyrie great again.

"Surrounded by faceless choirs, there's stand the lonely soloist So, let's sing out loud to those who have no place to go, here's the truth."

Sung by both Mika and Shu.

In my belief, these lines are dedicated to them, the Valkyrie that got injured after the war. They got no hope, not thing to relied on.

Shu got a bad representation, lost his mind.

Mika also had to suffer from the event but he's trying his very best not to become a burden to Shu after Nazuna left.

That was the moment when Mika became more doll-like than how he was before.

We stood together, yet loneliness filled inside our souls. Becoming the "soloist" singer without notice.

"Sing to those who have no place"

They're telling themself, their pitiful past self that the daunting world is now no more.

We now have a place to stay, a home to be in, we've got our back.

Ok, ok, here it comes, MY FAVORITE LINE!

LIKE, THERE ARE SO MUCH TO TALK ABOUT, I CAN'TTTTT

Ok, I can actually do that now ( since this analysis is already long as hell )

This line makes a connection to another line, which is:

"Here's the truth" - "Audience, please come"

"To the New World"

Isn't simply just about the god and the humans, it carries two meanings.

One is the literal, a sore thumb that sticks out the most to me: IT ABOUT THE VALKYRIE NEW ERAAAAA.

They maybe not yet healed, not yet prepared themself for the world outside, but they're now more happy than ever.

Shu is trying his best to understand Mika.

Mika is trying his best to become something of his own, escape from the realm of a soulless doll.

"Dancing with full bloom"

Like, uhm *raises eyebrows*, full bloom, full bloom you said?

The last time ( the first time Shu appeared in the game main story ), Shu said: "I am counting the days until we bring our blossoms together to make "Valkyrie" the most beautiful bouquet in the world."

And now ya said that you're FULL BLOOM? That can only mean one thing, they have finally found their meaning of art.

They may not "bloom" to the world but "bloom" to themself. Becoming different. They changing, they learning, and they are growing.

"where 0 and 1 dancing"

Yeh, you already know what I'm going to say. 0 and 1 are binary code or we usually call it "computer language" / bits.

0 and 1, is what this theme song is about. The mechanical god, the new world of mechanics. "0 and 1 dancing" is "The god is speaking".

Like, 0 1 then 1 0, 0 1 then 1 0, where 0 and 1 will change their place to make a byte, a string of bits, representing the god language.

And, it is just me or do I get the feeling that this goddess who wants to destroy a world in rust has his reason, he has a feeling that leaving the world like this, isn't a good idea.

Even if the humans are begging him to stop, he did not listen.

Because, in some of the next lines, we got this:

"A play that crueler than dream" (Shu line)

"With everyone's prayers" (Mika line)

"Everyone will remember it" (Shu line).

"Above the Surface world that full of selfishness and egoism" (Mika line)

The god see human as this selfish and only care for what they want most then how others feel.

"This lost child of the era, is confused by the fragile waves" (Mika line)

"So let's come and come into a new world trapped in 0 and 1" (Shu & Mika line)

Is about Valkyrie, IT ABOUT VALKYRIE. *Gone crazy at this point*

If you didn't know, Valkyris wasn't that used to the new system after the war. The DreamFes system made by Eichi, yeah, that one.

They skip school and most of the time do their show outside of school until Eichi himself steps in and threatens them to rejoin the school and accept the DreamFess system.

They were lost. Lost of the modern world, and still stay in the old era. Shu never wants to go back and join the DreamFes for once because how much he hated Eichi, and how much the war hurted him, yet, they return, make a change that not even Eichi can imagine of.

"Lost in their own tears, and still..." (Shu line)

"Falling away..." (Mika line)

They did, however, losing against Fine, and still...this was not the end.

THIS WAS A MARK FOR THE NEW BEGINNING.

That they're now known to DreamFes, open their mind and continue their journey.

That why the next line of the song came with a stronger beat. Bam! We are now reborn, we are now continue to blooming up on this world of hidden beauty. We'll find it and make art out of it!

"Scrutinize, lament, and let your own foolish schemes drive you crazy" (Shu line, it kinda fit Shu too)

"And now, ask yourself here and now." (Mika line)

"Is there an omnipotent being to be ruled?" (Both)

"And do you believe it?" (Shu line)

"Do you believe it?" (Mika line)

"Do you believe it?" (Both)

I think these lines are pointing to Shu and how he've been since the end of the war.

Scrutinize mean: examine or inspect closely and thoroughly.

While lament mean: a passionate expression of grief or sorrow.

After the war, Shu was cave for perfection even more than he was before, he wish to not made all that mistake again or else he might lose Mika too.

He drive himself crazy, then look back what happened, he started to ask questions.

He was so into perfection, he loses the meaning of art it self. He put himself into a jail, said that, this was all for the work of art, but it wasn't.

People are being harm for his actions, Mika wasn't getting any better if he keeps acting like this. Reckless and madness drive him away from the actual beauty in art that the old Shu was fond of.

So, he ask himself. If art is freedom, why so gaol...

"Is there an omnipotent being to be ruled?"

And realizing that, will he continue to be like this. Do you believe in such form of art that not bring happiness and joy?

For the bloom of Valkyrie, must we sacrifice our little life for the victory Shu wanted.

Also important element needed to be mention: Last Lament.

Meiyuu Deshi Kairou was released in 2023, and Last Lament which is also a Valkyrie song was released in 2017.

And in the song, there was this line: "It fine if we reach the brink of our dreams and rot forgotten."

"We'll use the flames of passion on us, to show them that we can melt even despair."

But, but! In their newest song ( from the Trip albums)

Shukufuku no Library

We can see, Shu is now accepting the future and wish for joy to Valkyrie then only to successfully reach their dream as soon as possible:

"Is it only success stories that are now illuminated by the love that shines down from the heavens?"

"No! An unfinished adventure stories is also a foolish memoir that's also precious."

"Come on, let's play the lovely poems of our lives and gently store them in the library of blessings."

Return, return, let's us get to the next line:

Ok, Ok, I love that they put both Friedrich Schiller work into one line!

"A play that's crueler than a dream" (Mika line)

"Everyone inside this veil wishing for something" (Shu line)

The god talk about everyone wishes, seeing their foolish little small wishes yet never to be turn into reality because the god already had their own plan for them.

It also Shu, talking to himself that even if life is cruel, everyone has their little dream.

"In the face of the myth of the Perfect world" (Shu line)

But Shu dream was too far from reality, can that Perfection he wished for really have a way to get?

From here on, the line repeat itself:

"confused by the fragile waves" (Shu line)

"This lost child of the era" (Mika line)

"So let's come and come into a new world trapped in 0 and 1" (Shu & Mika line)

But this time, Shu has become different, Valkyrie has changed! The lost child had found their way out of that jail!

"The labyrinth corridor, love is a Perfect world" (The back choir?)

And yes, he did be able to found out, love is the best way to a world he's wish for, no more madness from now on, only love and joy.

And maybe, just maybe, the goddess in this song also did.

Thank you for your time! Reading this.

It late now, and my ears...oh god...it had been listen to Meiyuu Deshi Kairou non-stop ( I remember like 8/10 of the goddam lyrics *cry and laughed at the same time* )

Also, one last thing...

In the 3D MV, noticed how Mika move, yes, he still keep that flexibility of him, but that not just a represent for a doll, Mika now turning it in to his own style of dance.

While Shu do art in a perfect and nicely organizing way.

Mika go for a chaos way that both resemble the old him and use it to make the new him.

In the last moment of the MV, Mika...I don't know if he forget or that is simply how the MV plays out, but there was a moment like this:

Mika when: Look at my Oshi-san!!!

Shu: Mika! Back up! You're supposed to be standing next to me.

Mika: Can i?

Shu: Yes. Yes you can. You're no longer a doll, but a human, a partner who place is staying next to me and performing art together.

Mika: Oh...I'm not fulling understand that, but ok! I'll try to stay next to you from now on!

( this is me, writing that out of thin air, the conversation may not be real, but the meaning are. Mika may be a little confused for suddenly got set free from being a soulless doll, he need his little time )

Thank...for reading...my dear ValkyrieP... I need a rest and a cup of coffee I guess *die*

#ensemble stars #mika kagehira #kagehira mika #shu itsuki #itsuki shu #valkyrie enstars #Meiyuu Deshi Kairou #Meiyuu Deshi Kairou analysis

[shares-a-vest]

💖 Fic Writing Review 2023 💖

I was tagged by @penny00dreadful @rocknrollsalad @cranberrymoons and @unclewaynemunson Thanks everyone! You all smashed it in 2023. Here's to more words wording and fun fandom times with our faves.

Tbh, it took me a good month minute to work out how to do this, seeing as I don't post much to ao3 (something I intend on mending in 2024). I'm very much going with the 'feel free to show whatever stats you like' aspect of the rules.

But before all that, I'd like to use this post as an opportunity to acknowledge everyone who enjoys my writing. I kinda just fell into writing in this fandom and discovered that I love it!

I'm also sending love and appreciation to my beloved moots and everyone in the stwg discord server. Here's to another year of creating, sharing and interacting 💖

This fandom really is my happy place a lot of the time, a much-needed creative outlet and a space where I can talk to people who let me be my silly little old self.

I have so much I want to write in 2024 (including some in-the-works stuff listed below). One goal I know I have in 2024 is to write what I'll temporarily title, 'The Origin of Joanie Munson'. I would really like to knuckle down and write a looonnnggg fic this year that would tell that story.

Anyway, enough of me talking, I'll stop before I get too sappy...

Top 5 Posts by Notes:

Wayne and Claudia to Steve's Rescue

I'm Dating Garfield

My Prince

Eddie gets stuck in Steve's shower after the power goes off

Eddie Munson: Sparkly Vampire Boyfriend

Proudest Work & Reflections:

Wayne and Steve get hearing aids: This post was very much inspired by my pop's ongoing struggle with his hearing aids. HoH Steve is a beloved headcanon of mine so I was happy to receive so much love for a little ficlet that came from a very real place.

Steve spends Father's Day with the Buckleys: If there's one Steve trope I will write, it's Steve Has Bad Parents™. I always find myself writing this trope and getting Steve all sad and angsty as a personal coping mechanism/outlet for irl Dad Stuff™. I was a pile of goo over the tags and comments saying this ficlet resonated with readers! We really are just out here projecting onto our blorbos to get through shit.

Joanie Munson's First Word: I love my Joanie Munson AU. And one thing I love writing into it is Wayne being a doting Grandpa. It was a WIP for quite a while and I remember waking up at like 3am, unable to sleep and bam I finished it, proving that sometimes it's worth letting something linger in the drafts until the moment strikes.

My Fandom Events in 2023 (I did a sprinkling of others, but these I completed/worked on consistently):

Spicy Six Fanworks Challenge SPRING and SUMMER

Steddie Week 2023

Steddiemas

Upcoming Works & Events (aka, next in the pipeline):

Spicy Six Fanworks Challenge WINTER

Clarkson Mixtape Fic

STWG Hozier Project

Tagging some precious moots (plus those above) to send my love and good New Year vibes to! @thefreakandthehair @tboyeddie @steventhusiast @imfinereallyy @hbyrde36 @spicysix @momotonescreaming @withacapitalp @farahsamboolents @hellion-child @sidekick-hero (also feel free to do this tag game too if you'd like/haven't already!)

Rules: Feel free to show whatever stats you have. Only want to show Ao3 stats? Rock on. Want to include some quantitative info instead of stats? Please do this. Want to change how yours is presented? Absolutely do that. Would rather eat glass than do this? Please don’t eat glass but don’t feel like you have to do this either.

#lily talks #writing wip #tag games #pinned post

[linka-from-captain-planet]

Florrickology, Part 5: Counsellor Desiré "Fuck It, We Ball" Florrick

Back in Part 1, I alluded to this fascinating aspect of my beloved's personality. I have had much to say about her overarching actions re: her role in the story, but it's time to focus on the details of what she actually does and how she actually handles the challenges she faces of the course of the three acts.

What is so interesting about Florrick is that she's presented as character who would be fully Lawful Good: careful, methodical, a planner... but IS she?

Again, it's important to emphasize that Florrick is a background figure. She's a quest-giver and a story-mover first, and a character last.

As I mentioned in previous installments of Florrickology, what she actually says and does isn't as important as the impression they leave the player with; you aren't supposed to read too much into her literal lines/actions, but rather take them at pretty much face-value and move on with the game, because they mostly boil down to a) moving the plot for more important characters/events and b) video game mechanics.

But as a background character propagandist and Florrick's first and #1 simp, this creates a playground of fun stuff to play with that is actually rooted in canon, because even if you aren't supposed to read into these things, you can and I did.

In Part 1, I said:

I'll have more to say about Desiré "Fuck It, We Ball" Florrick and her personality in another florrickology post, but the long and short of it is that this woman is not afraid of shit and sashays into every situation fully confident in her ability to charm or steamroll it to her liking. "She is used to getting her way", indeed.

Let's dig in deeper, encounter-by-encounter.

"She is used to getting her way" is straight from the dialogue file for the first Florrick encounter conversation, which along with "She should come off as no-nonsense but good" is the only description of her in the files. These definitely set the tone, because what's the first thing Florrick does in the game?

Command the player to assist with search and rescue. She's not really asking, even if she does phrase it in a civilized manner. As far as she's concerned, she's calling the player up (on borrowed authority, as she's only an advisor, not a duke herself) for a mandatory civic duty... even if they're not even Baldurian, or even from this plane of existence. If you think about it, unless Wyll is with you, it makes 0 sense to agree to anything she asks (especially if you don't yet know anything about the overall plot), and all this is an insane thing to ask of a random stranger who just happened to stop by.

I love this because not only is it insane, it's assertive. It's asking for forgiveness, not permission. It's the door-in-the-face technique. It's being so self-assured and confident that she is correct and others will comply because she is correct that it doesn't even occur to her that anyone would refuse. From her perspective, it's probably a small ask considering what she would be willing to do, and proceeds to actually do, for the sake of the greater good and the survival of Baldur's Gate.

My first play through I had literally no clue what the fuck she was talking about, was only tangentially aware that "Baldur's Gate" was an actual place and not the place I currently was, and had not yet synthesized any information about the overall plot, but of course I was immediately like "never arguing with a woman with big brown eyes... whatever you say gorgeous" and would have immediately run to """moonrise towers""" if I had any idea where it was. So needless to say it worked on me.

This blisteringly self-assured and balls-to-the-wall approach to handling every situation follows her throughout the game.

Depending on how you progress through the Act 1 map, she may be the first character who tells you details about Moonrise Towers, the center of this hot new cult on the block, swallowed in shadows so perilous that they can only be attributed to nefarious powers at work... so obviously, she's just like "anyway, I'll see you there."

And then she literally runs off with her ragtag group of surviving Fists, thong and all. No further planning. No correspondence with contacts in the city. It IS the next step in handling this matter in her estimation, which is true and correct, so that's what they'll do.

Fuck it, we ball.

When you meet her again in the Last Light Inn, her Fists have completed a reconnaissance mission to Moonrise (maybe she went with, considering her famously good scouting skills) and determined it to be unassailable, which indicates she considered storming the tower as an option, despite presumably already having rendezvoused with the Harpers who informed her that the tower was guarded by cultists, zombies, and an immortal undead general. (You also find her mid-argument with a Fist, putting him in his place as he questions her authority and she is NOT having it.)

On speaking with her, she promptly voluntells the player's party to investigate the tower further, while she returns to the city to appeal to the council for reinforcements, specifically newfangled Steel Watch units. Then for some reason, she drops this fairly baffling line:

Baby... what the fuck do you mean?

Does she mean she half-expects to die trying to transverse the shadow-cursed lands, which she's already done with no issues (presumably sheltered by the radiant glow of her gorgeousness)... or does she know or suspect there's something up with the council, which she's never indicated before? I think I missed something in this convo due to being distracted by beautiful she looks in this lighting, but if I didn't, then I guess she's possibly referring to getting past the Absolute's army parked in the way to the city, but regardless...

Fuck it, we ball. It's what she decided to do, so it will be done.

The next time you meet her, she's like a completely different woman. Defeated, head hung, demoralized, just waiting in her cell for execution. She can't escape for Video Game Reasons, but realistically... she definitely could, as a level 11 wizard. She just chooses not to, because as she says herself, she already lost. She failed, and the city will fall, and there's nothing worth living for.

It's shocking to see her in this state because it's so discordant with her previous behavior: head high, spine iron, barking orders.

So, good thing she bounces back immediately! This is again a Video Game Mechanic, but I do find it very in character that her response to even the "I'll beat your ass" rescue option is basically "You're totally right, giving up wasn't very cash money of me."

I've had much to say about the last real Florrick encounter, and how much it sucks ass, but it really is the biggest Fuck It, We Ball moment in the game, because you have to consider:

Florrick knows the player and/or Wyll have killed the avatar of a god. And she confronts them anyway, ready to fight and definitely ready to die. She's already fugitive marked for death; she's already determined that with Ulder fallen, the city is doomed.

Might as well die like she lived, right? Might as well take a mother fucker down with her, right?

All of this subtle chaos and insanity is super fun (also hot) to me because it's like... what is this woman's actual deal? Combined with what I pointed out in Florrickology Part 3, where Wyll implies it's somewhat routine practice for her to up and kill would-be assassins and also scout the wilderness for danger, "moving the plot" and "video game mechanics" add up to one hell of a woman. How does she come off as such an uptight, level-headed person but sometimes act like 5 raccoons stuffed into a distractingly sexy dress?

Truly an icon of a character for us modern-day corporate girlies who just get a little squirrelies sometimes.

Women can truly do it all!

#probably will have to edit and repost this one later #brain full of stardew valley but I wanted to keep some momentum #florrickology #counsellor florrick #ball so hard university

[gabessquishytum]

when shy warprize hobussy first came up you mentioned clit piercings and. yeah we need to come back around to that. because imagine! dream's having so much fun with his new prize and his pretty pussy. so obviously hob deserves some nice new decoration! and he has such a lovely big clit already, it just seems like the logical choice to make it stand out even more.

dream knows the piercing itself will be painful for hob -- he wants hob's clit itself pierced, after all -- but he holds hob while the piercer gets everything ready and promises a reward if hob's good. and he is, of course he is, hob wants more than anything to be good for dream, so he lets dream spread his legs wide and he holds perfectly still and he... maybe discovers he likes pain more than he thought he did, because he very nearly comes, but he's a good boy and he doesn't and he holds still!

(his reward is getting to lounge around in dream's quarters for a few days. which is exactly what he needs, considering the only way for him to be comfortable is lying down with his legs spread wide, but he... misses being kept in front of the court. more than he really wants to admit)

and of course, dream is so attentive while hob heals! he's ordered the very best healing salves available to make sure hob heals quickly and cleanly (and if he asked for a few extra ingredients to encourage hob's clit to grow even bigger, well...) and he insists on applying them himself. which means a few times a day hob is laid out and subjected to a very thorough but very slow massage of his clit. he's maybe losing his mind a little.

and then, of course, once the piercing is all healed? dream connmisisons quite a collection of jewellery for his favourite pet, and he loves picking out a new piece for hob every morning. he especially loves the big, ornate pieces -- heavy gold and dangling gems, perfect for tugging on hob's clit and making it as obvious as possible to anyone to looks at him. and for making hob aware of his clit as every step he takes sends the gems swinging. dream likes to have hob fetch things from elsewhere in the throne room on those days, just to watch him walk around. and then, some days he just wants to keep hob close. those are the days when he attaches a leash to hob's piercing. he's already thinking of how he should have hob pierced next.

-🐈‍⬛

Oh my beloved 🐈‍⬛!!! Once again you've hit the spot <333

I am just so obsessed with the idea of Hob with his lovely big clit decorated with heavy jewellery. It tugs and stings, and swings between his legs whenever he has to move, and he just makes the cutest little noises when the jewellery is pulled or played with. He's such a loud, whiney little pet, but Dream knows that Hob is secretly pleased with his new ornaments. He's allowed to play with his jewellery if he's a good boy, and Dream keeps catching him tugging on the piercing even though it makes him squeal with pain. Poor little darling just can't resist how good it feels.

It's the perfect way for Dream to show off his wealth and generosity. Whenever visitors come from foreign lands, they see Hob’s pretty clit decorated with thick golden chains and studded with rubies, and they know that Dream must be sooo rich. The visitors are encouraged to come up and play with Hob’s big puffy clit, tug on his jewellery and generally make him squirm.

Obviously the highlight of the day is when Dream gets to leash Hob and parade him past the entire court as they head off to bed together. Sometimes Hob stumbles or slows down just for the pleasure of being dragged along by his throbbing, aching clit <3 and then when they get to Dream’s chambers, he'll lovingly switch Hob’s piercing out for something more suitable for bedtime. A nice big pussy plug with a locking mechanism that connects to the clit piercing via a chain. Hob is soooo cute and whiney as Dream fucks his arse and totally ignores his poor neglected pussy.

Hob will have to keep working hard if he wants to earn an orgasm! But if he's very well behaved during his next piercing session, Dream will certainly reward him. Dream is currently thinking of piercing his navel next - he'll put a nice big bar piercing in, like an arrow pointing the way to his cunt. Just to remind Hob of his true purpose in life as Dream’s precious sex pet <333

#🐈‍⬛ anon #the sandman #dreamling #nsft #warprize hob

[endwithajadestrick]

Who Is Fucking In Star Wars? A Non-Comprehensive List

So in honor(?) of the DDoS attack on Ao3 preventing us all from mainlining slash fic, I've decided to go horny on main and list off my opinion about 3 traits of all Star Wars characters. Our beloved Galaxy Far Far Away is a usually (tragically) chaste place, which may lead us to ponder about our faves:

Do they even know what sex is?

Have they ever actually HAD sex?

Are they any good at it?

We will not be including characters who are minors in this list. Obviously. Judgements are based somewhat on the lore, but really more on vibes. Perhaps it goes without saying, this will be lightly NSFW.

This is probably gonna take a while and stop feeling like a good idea halfway through. Which of your exes does that describe? Let's Go!!!

Starting with the big three:

Han Solo

Always begin with an easy one.

Does he even know what sex is? Yes, unlike a surprising number of people in this galaxy, Han knows how to do the do.

Has he ever had sex before? Sure (but not as often as he wants you to think). Do you, uh . . . maybe wanna get out of here and come back to his ship? She's called the Millenium Falcon.

Is he good at sex? Look. It's not going to be good the first time. He's gonna keep insisting that he "knows what he's doing," but you wish he would just let you explain what you like. He needs to be girlbossed around a little bit. And it is mostly girls for him, though the occasional guy and non-binary being has mounted that loading ramp too. His bedroom does smell kind of funny.

Luke Skywalker

This one may be controversial for some people.

Does he know what sex is? Nope. Farm boy didn't go to schmool. Skool? Am I saying that right? There were no copies of Our Bodies, Our Selves lying around the rebellion base, and you better believe the Sacred Jedi Texts did not include some kind of version of the Kama Sutra. Han wasn't gonna draw him a diagram either; that would be too embarrassing. This man is not learned in the pleasures of the flesh.

Has he ever had sex? Also no. He got into some light over-the-clothes action with Biggs Darklighter when they were teens, but nothing ever went any farther than that.

Is he good at sex? I'm sure a real earnest effort would be made, but we'll never know, will we. Because he DOES NOT KNOW what sex is.

Princess/General Leia Organa

Does she even know what sex is? Oh, absolutely. This woman was treated to an actual formal education. She probably even got a nice, progressive version of SexEd that talked about pleasure and consent and not just all the weird diseases you could get--assuming the Empire didn't nix that sort of thing on Alderaan, which, honestly, they might have.

Has she ever had sex? Of course. And despite being a princess, she's not that precious about courtship either. Casual flings are totally fine and normal.

Is she good at sex? Leia is mature but, like her hairstyles, can be a little tightly wound. Once you get over any initial awkwardness, though, it's sure to be a fun flirty time.

And this is Star Wars, so sooner or later we have to address--

Chewbacca

--the aliens of it all. Welcome, monster fuckers! It's not even weird in this universe!

Does he know what sex is? Chewy is canonically 234 years old as of TLJ, so I'm going to give this a definite yes. Also, he hangs out with Han Solo and all the doors in this universe appear to be panel-controlled. There are no door knobs to stick a sock on; he's SEEN some things.

Has he ever had sex? Again, 234 years old, and Chewy has never seemed like a wallflower. This is also a yes.

Is he good at it? Maz Kanata seems to think so? I don't pretend I have the predilections/imagination to get the appeal (though I honor those that do), but I'm gonna take a swing and say, yes, Chewbacca is a good lover. Solid stamina, surprisingly tender after-care.

Lando Calrissian

Does he know what sex is? Yes, and not just on a mechanical level. If anyone in this universe HAS read the Space Kama Sutra, it's Lando.

Has he ever had sex? He has. And he doesn't keep a list of all his past sexual partners because that would be cras. But he COULD tell you about each of them, names, dates, locations. But he won't. But he could.

Is he good at it? Surprisingly, yes! He may come across as a guy who is all talk, but Lando is an artist at heart and the democratically elected President of Consent. He has mood lighting set up and a tastefully curated playlist. The atmosphere is fun, the oral is enthusiastic. When you're done--wow!--there's a mini bar right near the bed. And would you like to borrow a silk robe?

Your magical evening will not prevent him from cheating you at cards later, though.

Obi-Wan Kenobi

Does he know what sex is? No. He learned once, but has since memory-holed the information. Otherwise he might accidentally experience some pleasure from the stick up his bum.

Has he ever had sex? Many beings have made valiant efforts to claim this beautiful man as a conquest. All have failed, but there was much exquisite yearning along the way.

Is he good at it? Hypothetically? Alas, my heart wants to say yes, but my head says no.

Padmé Amidala

Does she know what sex is? Look at this dress. This dress is a CHOICE, a ruthless tactical decision made by someone who definitely knows what sex is.

Has she ever had sex? Yes, but her taste in men--oh, honey.

Is she good at it? A pillow princess if there ever was one. You will be doing all the work.

Anakin Skywalker

Does he know what sex is? No.

Has he ever had sex? Yes.

Is he good at it? . . . and I know those answers seem contradictory, but it's true. This is a man who has had normal, consensual adult sex. However, baby boy's brain is full of more holes than a colander. He is dummy thick actually in the head region. He is incapable of retaining complex thoughts such as the nuances of sexuality.

That said, he is a creature of pure instinct and, like, yeah, the lovemaking is pretty hot.

Mace Windu

Does he know what sex is? Yes.

Has he ever had sex? No.

Is he good at it? If it ever happened, which it won't? No, and Mace is possibly the only Sammy J character for whom this holds true. It would be strictly procreative missionary. No fun allowed.

Yoda

Does he know what sex is? Yes, he is aware. Knowledge is this little frog man's burden; Yoda is too in touch with the Force, the life energy of the universe, not to know. He WOULD not know if he could, but he has had to settle for just ignoring the information.

Has he ever had sex? You know I am genuinely stumped on this one. On one hand, he is the perfect ascetic Jedi sage. On the other hand, a nine hundred year lifespan is a long time . . . anything could have happened to this lilliputian enigma.

Is he good at it? Size matters not.

The Mandalorian

Yeah I know his name is "Din Djarin." Shush.

Does he know what sex is? I'm pretty sure this guy thinks that babies are found, not made. He does not know what sex is.

Has he ever had sex? I don't care what season one implied about Mando and that toothsome twi'lek, it's never happened. The helmet doesn't come off and the trousers don't drop.

Is he good at it? And here's the tragedy of it all, right? Because we know that underneath that impenetrable layer of beskar lies such a man. I don't even care if he's an ace, as seems plausible. Just the chance to look him in the eye would mean worlds.

Finn

Does he know what sex is? Negative, Ghost Rider. It's not something the First Order teaches their child soldiers, and the Resistance, like the rebellion of old, has bigger fish to fry. Poe wants to explain it to him, but feels like he has a dog in that race and it wouldn't be right.

Has he ever had sex? Men, women, and other beings are lining up around the corner for a shot at this man, but he only has eyes for one woman, and she in turn may be legitimately the only person in the galaxy who does not pine for him. Hang in there, Finn! Maybe one day she'll become emotionally available.

Is he good at it? While we have seen Finn makes some selfish moves along his journey--mainly because of, y'know, all the trauma--he has done a lot of growing and is an essentially generous spirit. This gets a yes.

Rey Skywalker

Does she know what sex is? Not in either The Force Awakens or The Last Jedi, but before Rise of Skywalker Leia explained it to her. She's the future of the Jedi after all, and this is basic stuff, goddammit Luke!

Has she ever had sex? Hmm, what's that? Sorry, she's super busy right now with, like, destiny and stuff.

Is she good at it? Rey seems to pick most things up fairly quickly, so you have to imagine that would hold true for l'amour as well, except that she'll also be a bit of a try-hard. Do less, sweety. Really, it's fine.

Lightning Round

Asajj Ventress

Yes, yes, and it depends on the answer to one question: do you enjoy pain?

L3-37

It Works.

Cinta Kaz

Yes, yes, and not just good but so good it will politically radicalize you.

Karis Nemik

No, which is a shame because you know that he would have made sex-positive feminism and queer theory a huge part of his manifesto.

Count Dooku

Gay, and pulled legendary numbers of exquisite vintage ass across the galaxy. It's the real reason Sidious traded him in for simple, pussy-whipped Anakin. He just couldn't take it anymore.

Luthen Rael

Hope you like role-play.

Armitage Hux

Yes, it's true; this man has no dick.

Qi'ra

Yes, yes, and good but maybe in a dangerous way? Like drugs, it's possible that you--maybe even most people--could have a healthy, well-adjusted relationship to it. But there's a chance also that it will alter your brain chemistry, fundamentally shift your priorities, and ruin your life. The only way for sure to be safe is not to try it, not even once!

The Bendu

The One in the Middle. So in this case, would that be, like, the taint?

Reva Sevander

I mean, do you like it freaky? How freaky do you like it? There are levels to this sort of thing, and you, through no fault of your own, may not be ready for this ride.

Cassian Andor

Cassian Andor fucks.

The Armorer

I tried to get a read on this one, and all I picked up was radio static. We'll never know. We'll just never know.

Rose Tico

Rose appears naive at first, but she's actually quite worldly and will rock yours.

Bo-Katan Kryze

I daresay more than 2% of us want her to sit on our face. Ms. Sackoff was really lowballing it. Bo does not know what sex is, however, and is rarely in listening-mode, so that's a hurdle we'll have to overcome.

But it's more than 2%.

Poe Dameron

Yes, yes, and does it even matter? It would be an honor just to be considered, sir.

Hera Syndulla

Whatever Lola wants, Lola gets. Apparently what Lola wants is an inexperienced, sexually repressed Jedi hotty. In this way, she is the true queen of Star Wars fandom. Captain our ship, Hera!

And Finally:

Kylo Ren

I do not understand the hold this man has on some of you--which is fine; you don't need me to understand it. He does not know what sex is, he is so horny and angry all the time. And sure, maybe you CAN fix him by completing his education. Blessings, angels. Live your fantasy.

Just promise me you'll use protection? And I don't mean a condom, I mean body armor.

#star wars #luke skywalker #anakin skywalker #the mandalorian #han solo #leia organa #padme amidala #obi wan kenobi #din djarin #kylo ren #rey skywalker #star wars finn #cassian andor #yoda #mace windu #the armorer #bo katan kryze #cinta kaz #reva sevander #hera syndulla #the bendu #qi'ra #lando calrissian #chewbacca #l3 37 #rose tico #armitage hux #luthen rael #count dooku #karis nemik