#lee hyunjae angst

[zzoguri]

safe haven (how much longer do we have?) ➵ jacob bae

jacob bae x reader, slight lee hyunjae x reader

you can only hope for more tomorrows with jacob.

genre/warnings ➵ strangers to lovers, heavy angst with a happy ending, touch of fluff, afab reader (no-gendered terms), lowercase intended, apocalypse au, hurt/comfort (both physical and emotional), depictions of grief, descriptions of gore/blood, use of guns, allusions and discussions of suicide, minor character deaths, hyunjae is your ex, changmin and kevin appearance :'), elements of the last of us (don't support neil druckmann!), mostly written in past tense (because u're remembering!)

word count ➵ 6.2k words

inspired by ➵ “anaheim” by niki, “are you happy?” by @wavesmp3, “love wins all” by iu, episode three of hbo's the last of us, and “you’re gonna carry that weight” quote from cowboy bebop

a/n ➵ my life changed forever reading shawna's piece. thank you for letting me write a piece based on your work (if you haven't read it, go check it out!) just like you, i am a sucker for apocalypse aus :')) hope i did justice to your beautiful work. anyway, love wins all coming out yesterday was a miracle because it's definitely made for this fic </3 thank you to @heemingyu and @deobienthusiast for betareading a bit of this! if you enjoyed reading, please do reblog and leave feedback!

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time was the one thing that occupied everyone’s minds. it held value, something that shouldn’t be wasted, and people revolved their lives around it.

questions flew around with every tick and tock—what day is it today? when’s your next doctor’s appointment? how long has it been since you’ve last seen your friends from high school? until when does this meeting last? 

as the hands of the clock continue to rotate, the calendar pages would flip along. birthdays were celebrated with every revolution as candles on cakes were lit up, awaiting the puff of celebrants as they wished for their desires. holidays were ones to look forward to; people dressed up to celebrate periods of the year that mattered to them while others slept in until noon. and days were spent counting down until graduations, where caps with tassels would fly to the expanse of blue and orange as cheers and sobs sound throughout.

but now, no one keeps track of time. clocks stopped moving and calendars weren’t produced annually. once the surge of the infected took over, grabbing on humans, taking them away from the lives they’ve lived, everyone ran like they were running out of time. with every second that passes, people are ridden with possibilities of how they might bid farewell to life itself—would it be through the hands of the infected or their own?

now, only one question echoes within their minds: how long do we have?

yet, the clock continues—tick, tock, tick, tock. it keeps going, and going, and going, like how everyone expects it. while everyone seemed to let time go, you still kept track of it all: birthdays, holidays, a graduation you never had.

the outbreak hit two years ago on the day of hyunjae’s graduation. cheers turned into screams. white togas and diplomas were splattered with red. the lively became lifeless.

you remember hyunjae’s hand in yours, fingers gripping you as if you were his life, as you charged out of the gymnasium, legs keeping up with the speed of his. you darted off to nowhere as images of the infected tearing people apart took up every block, all the way from skin to bone.

and while it was a rush of tragedies, hyunjae was the only hope you had.

“keep your eyes on me,” he glanced at you, eyes off the path as he met your gaze. “don’t look at them. only look at me.”

it was impossible to ignore the wails that filled your ears, but you would repeat his words—his soft-spoken voice—to drown them out.

by nightfall, you and hyunjae found yourselves in a motel room, skin cleaned from blood splatters and dressed in clothes that engulfed your figures, and in each other’s arms on a twin-sized bed. the duvet that wrapped around you two is thin, not at all keeping you warm for the night, but the warmth of hyunjae was enough to provide you a sense of security—stability amidst the ever-changing world.

he whispered into the crown of your head, words meant to dispel your fears, all while you sobbed into his shirt. there was nothing that he could do but stay strong for you.

and for a few days, that room acted as your safe haven. the time spent within those four walls is the life you imagined your future with hyunjae. it would’ve been in a two-story house with a garden where a singular orange tree stands, lounging on the couch as you played movies to fall asleep to, but all you had was an old room with a carpeted floor with unrecognizable stains and a bathroom unable to fit two.

yet, you would choose this over anything. even if it meant eating instant noodles for every meal or sleeping on a mattress that ruins your backs, you would choose this if it meant hyunjae would be with you.

still, time continues to move. hyunjae knew that you both couldn’t stay in that room or else the infected may reach you. so when you both went to bed on that last night, you outlined his features from the space between his eyebrows all the way to his lips, and you spent that time memorizing his warmth to carry with you for the rest of your life. you could only hope that he stays with you until the end.

after a month passed, you and hyunjae met changmin, an injured boy who only wanted to live. at first, hyunjae was hesitant to take the stranger in, but you wouldn’t allow yourself to live with the idea of abandoning someone in need. in a world where the infected have taken over, it only seemed right to help out others, save them from a fate they’re not ready to meet.

what started off as a pair turned into a trio. you’ve learned more about what it takes to survive in this life. long gone is the need for money to buy necessities; you need to scavenge if you want to live in an infected-ridden world. thanks to changmin, you and hyunjae got to learn about how to find supplies in every building that you pass on the journey.

but it’s not enough to know where to find food and bullets. hyunjae decided that it was only right to teach you how to use a gun. with every morning that came, you two spent hours learning how to hold, reload, and fire.

“don’t worry,” he told you as his chin hovered over your shoulder. you both stared at the tin can situated on a stack of boxes only a few meters away. “you won’t have to worry about fighting alone. i’ll be here with you.” as you exhaled, your eyes zeroed in on the target. “now, shoot.”

six months have passed, and you were happy that you were still a trio. changmin became your best friend over that time. his laughs were enough to shine glimmers of hope onto you. you were glad that you decided to help him off the ground and tend his bullet wound that day.

until you found yourselves retreating from the horde of infected.

time moves at a constant speed but it can become swift if it decides to. when you and changmin reached the doors leading to safety, you remember seeing hyunjae fighting off those who were once like you, bullets firing at their heads. you remember your screams, telling him to run to you—go to where it’s safe—so that you can keep having tomorrows with him.

yet, hyunjae glanced at changmin, nodding at him before his eyes met yours. you watched how his mouth moves, a soundless three-word phrase leaving him before the doors shut before you. you would’ve pried them open but changmin kept his arms around you, holding you back from letting the infected reach you, from letting hyunjae come back to you.

the wails that left you are enough to attract the infected. if only the infected were to burst through the doors, grab onto you and bring you to hyunjae, then maybe you would stop crying. yet, changmin dragged you away. you never saw him as your best friend after that.

a month passed, and you still refused to talk to him. the boy tried to strike up a conversation with you, trying to earn your laugh like he used to, but he was only met with a cold shoulder. with every brick he put, you smashed your sledgehammer against it, dispelling any hope he had in rekindling his friendship with you.

the two of you learned to live in silence, fighting for survival while dealing with the loss of the one who would always bring you both to safety.

until you came across another boy who pointed his gun toward you. his defensive demeanor reminded you of hyunjae, and you wondered if this was his doing—his reincarnation. but before he could pull the trigger, changmin saved you from meeting your fate.

somehow, the duo had turned into a trio once more. you still refused to talk to changmin, but would eavesdrop on the conversations he shared with the stranger. you learned that the new addition is named jacob.

but even the stranger wasn’t enough to fill the void that hyunjae left. with every nightfall, when the soft snores of the two boys filled your ears, tears streamed down your face as sobs threatened to spill out of your mouth. the palm of your hand wasn’t enough to muffle your weeps. behind your eyelids, hyunjae’s last words to you play on repeat—the ones he failed to say, the ones you’ll never hear again.

maybe if you didn’t leave that motel room then he would’ve still been with you, arms finding their place around your waist as he trails kisses all over you. if the outbreak didn’t happen, then maybe you would be living in that two-story house with him. maybe you would wake up to a glass of freshly squeezed orange juice by the bedside table and the warmth of his lips on your forehead. and maybe you could finally tell him yes before he slips the silver band on your finger—you could’ve grown with him until your hair turns grey.

the weight you carry never got lighter with time. the void continued to consume you whole with the goal of ripping you apart. as another month passed, another life was lost—not to the infected but to the raiders.

“changmin, you have to stay with me.” those were the first words you told him since hyunjae’s death. crimson continued to spill out of his abdomen through the gaps between your fingertips in the same way tears flow out. “jacob! find gauze, betadine, anything!” you never glanced at the stranger, keeping your gaze on your best friend whose eyes continued to droop.

still, changmin caressed your face, thumb wiping teardrops. as he slowly entered territories that you both knew he would never escape, he grinned at you one last time. “i missed hearing you. i’m glad you’ll be the last thing i hear.”

but you tried to tell him that you couldn’t be the last voice he heard. it should’ve been with someone he can imagine his future with, maybe in a two-story house or a cramped flat in an apartment complex. he deserves more tomorrows in the same way hyunjae did.

but time continues to move. it took him away from you in a matter of minutes, slithering away without a second thought and no regard for the value of life, and all you were left with was his temple—still, lifeless. as you sobbed into his shirt, still holding the wound, the warmth of jacob’s hand stayed on your back, moving along with your wails. 

now, you carry the loss of two. it never got easier with time.

jacob still sticks with you. it only seemed right. stay strong in numbers as you wander off to nowhere, grasping at the loose ends of survival.

two weeks have passed. you and jacob got used to the new dynamic; while he goes hunting and you’re tasked with scavenging, you both played your roles in combat, ready for any raid or horde. when night would come, you both took shifts, keeping watch while the other got some shut-eye.

until that one evening.

you recall the sounds of wood crackling from the fire. it stood strong against the breeze—burning, shining—surrounded by greens that latch on browns. hues of amber cascaded over your skin, painting you with warmth—it’ll never compare to the one you craved. your eyes drifted to jacob who sat across from you, his eyes trained on the fire as he rubbed his palms together. perhaps he craved the same type of warmth you longed for.

“we used to be three.” his eyes snapped towards yours. “before you came, we used to be three—changmin, me, and—” it rose in you like bile, wanting to escape but never leaving. “we were three then.”

you glanced at the fire that continued to burn. “we met changmin a month after the outbreak, spent six months together until—” the claws of the void struck against your throat, holding you back from sharing with the stranger what your life was before he came. while you never found the right words to say, jacob never pushed, letting you say what you wanted to share while filling in the blanks on his own. 

“i resented changmin after what happened.” you moved your gaze to jacob whose eyes never left you. “refused to talk to him. refused to forgive.” and you remember how you hesitated, taking a deep breath in before sputtering out the next sentence. “refused to accept.”

nine months ago, the outbreak didn’t happen. nine months ago, you were attending hyunjae’s graduation. nine months ago, you two were imagining your tomorrows—together, for eternity.

and those nine months fractured all hopes and dreams; the glass is now littered with cracks, ready to burst into shards.

“but i think about the last time we saw changmin,” the image of him sitting in front of you all frail, treading the line between life and death, flashed in front of you; it’s quick but strong to remind you of what’s lost. “and i wish i could’ve learned how to forgive during those two months.”

but it was an impossible request. how could you ever forgive a boy you’ve known for only six months for taking your future away? how could you forgive a world that took him away? how could you forgive and live?

and still, you did.

you left it at that. they were enough. so when you told jacob that you’ll take over tonight’s shift, he never asked to hear more. instead, he laid near the campfire as you keep an eye out.

and once enough hours have passed, you allowed yourself to sob like other nights. the breeze that passed through branches reminded you of changmin; rustling leaves imitated the giggles of the boy you’ve only known during the apocalypse.

the wind that grazed against your skin should’ve been a nuisance, but the warmth of the fire wrapped you up like the duvet in that motel room. and you don’t complain—it’s the only part of hyunjae you have left.

the heat was enough to last you the night, but the chill of reality sent you back to the void.

that night, jacob listened to your sobs. not one of you got enough rest for the journey.

another two weeks went by. you two got into a better groove of the routine; instead of hunting and scavenging in silence, you and jacob found yourselves talking more about your lives before the outbreak. you learned that he was born the same year as hyunjae, and he shared that he had plans to pursue music.

“if the world finds a cure to this mess, you have to promise me that you’ll get me front-row tickets to your first show.” it was a joke. in what world could there be a cure for the infected? but the wishful thinking of what could be—what could’ve been—is all you had left.

still, jacob promised you that.

that night, you two stayed in the living room of an abandoned house. instead of lighting the fireplace, candles were placed on the coffee table. they shined in the middle of you two, you who stayed on the couch and jacob who sat on the mattress lying on the floor.

“where were you?” his eyes met yours. “on the day of the outbreak, i mean.”

he leaned back, hands resting on the mattress before he looked once more at the wax that continued to melt. “it was my graduation.” it hit you like a sudden downpour on a sunny day. “i was next in line to go up on the stage until the infected came.”

and when you said the name of the university, his gaze met yours as his shoulders stiffened. “m—my hyunjae.” it’s the first time you spoke of his name, and the sight of jacob’s eyes widening over it was enough to speak for himself.

“i—i didn’t know,” he whispered, but his words were loud enough to shatter glass. “i only spoke to him a few times. he spoke of you with so much love.”

your heart skipped beats; it should’ve been enough to send you off into the same territories where hyunjae and changmin now stay. your mouth turned dry as jacob’s voice morphed into radio silence.

before you knew it, the two of you left the information to hang in the air as you tried to drift into slumber. the clock continues to tick. minutes turned into hours; time moves like it usually does once more.

yet, you were stuck in the same gymnasium, fixing hyunjae’s toga as you scolded him about how wrinkled it’s become—hey! you’ll go up on stage soon. we can’t take pictures of you like this. despite your words, he smiled at you before grazing his lips on your temple—his silent way of telling you the three-word phrase.

in a split second, you were off the couch. you barged out of the house, clutching your chest as the knot constricted your throat, and your feet dragged you off to nowhere. every sound has turned into a buzz—only the voice of hyunjae being the one clear thing amidst the hysteria.

before you knew it, you stood before a horizon of green. it takes only one step into the woods, alone with no protection, for you to meet your demise. you would’ve charged into it in the same way you would’ve charged out to save hyunjae that day.

all it takes is one step, and—

“what are you doing?!” a pair of hands gripped your shoulders, spinning you around until you were face-to-face with the last form of life that you know of. his breaths were short as his fingers dug into your arms. “you can’t just rush out in the middle of the night! i woke up worried sick.” his eyebrows knitted in frustration. confusion. distress. 

the voice was caught in your throat. how does one begin to unpack the baggage they’ve learned to carry? when the items they bring are revolting, rotten, repugnant, how does someone not feel shame about showing all the tattered-up objects? how do you learn to open up to someone you’ve only known for three months?

your hands trembled; you’ve carried the weight of it all for too long.

in that split second, your nose met the juncture between his chin and shoulder. the material of his shirt against your cheek allowed you to bathe in what you miss—the hand of changmin that once caressed your face, the lips of hyunjae that lingered with every kiss. all the moments that you hoped time would freeze just for you lives in the boy you stick with for survival.

all it took were jacob’s hands to rest on the lower side of your back for the tears to begin their stream. the sobs spill out. for once, they weren’t muffled like those other nights. they sounded throughout the space that surrounded you two. you allowed yourself to drop the baggage only for a few minutes.

jacob took you back to the house that night, allowing you to sob about all that you’ve kept under the wraps. when sunrise came, you found your legs mixed with his as his arms remained wrapped around you, and your ear pressed against his chest. the sound of his breathing is the one reminder of what a safe haven is. 

half a year went by. jacob still stays by your side. the baggage got lighter.

it should’ve been the same routine; jacob goes off to hunt while you scavenge, and you’ll take turns on the night shifts. but that night shifted something between you two—stolen glances, quiet giggles, linked fingers.

two months have gone by. the moon shined through the trees, their shadows cascading on an abandoned cabin that you and jacob decided to stay in for that night.

it should’ve been the same set-up as other nights spent in abandoned houses; you’ll sleep on the couch while he sleeps on a dragged-out mattress. instead, he sat with you on the couch, your back resting on his chest along with his hand staying on your arm. 

a lit candle rested on the table; its amber tones painted the jacob’s skin—close to the fruit tree that stands in your lost future.

“what would you do if there is a cure to this?” you watched how his fingers danced across your skin, calloused from plucking guitar strings or wielding a gun. 

jacob’s chest rumbled against your back as he hummed. “what would you do?”

a giggle left you as you looked at the boy. “i was the one who asked you first!”

he shot you a grin as his hand slipped into yours. the candle continued to burn; it did a poor job of giving you light and warmth that night. but he did it all—one smile. one exhale. one indication to show that he lives.

“travel, maybe? or i’ll go back to writing music.” you nodded at his plans before looking back at the light source. “what about you?”

“i don’t know.”

there was no point in going back to university after such a catastrophe. if anything, the year spent surrounded by the infected, fighting for survival, has shown you that there’s more to life than the perpetual cycle of working a nine-to-five.

so…

“i would settle down if i could.” the wax continued to melt. “i think i’ve seen enough of the world. for once, i just want to stay home, indulge in my hobbies, live the life that i want.”

his breath grazed the top of your head. “with someone?” and suddenly, you became aware of it all—the heat that emitted from his palm, the movement of his chest against your back, the gravity of his question.

the words get caught in your throat. your heartbeat rang in your ears. for the first time since hyunjae’s death, you considered it. 

“with someone.”

before you knew it, his hand caressed your cheek. you were forced to meet his eyes—they glistened with devotion. he leaned forward, his breath grazing your skin while you held in yours. you didn’t miss how his gaze flickered to your lips before he met your eyes once more.

then, he held back. it’s a choice, one only you can make. but when your eyes shut, it’s a quiet plea—a silent yes.

his lips met yours. 

the warmth that blossomed in your chest wasn’t like the one in that motel room. not like the embrace of the one you’ve lost. it was one of all seasons—changing with the weather, bringing comfort throughout the everchanging times.

it’s a perpetual cycle of fighting for survival. you’ll endure through it all.

a month passed by, and you came across another boy on the journey. he’s named kevin, and he told you of a safe haven located in the town that you and jacob grew up in.

for a moment, it was an internal debate—should you go back to where the downfall started? can you go to where the memory of hyunjae still lives?

but one glance at jacob was enough to settle it. the three of you embarked on your journey.

you remember that day. it was a walk with the goal of finding a car to make the journey back an easy one. the heat of the sun prickled against your skin, but you still kept your arms crossed.

“are you two together?” kevin asked, causing you to whip your head towards him. your eyes met jacob’s for a split second—confusion, dejection—before they landed back at the stranger who kept his eyes on the path you took.

“no, we aren’t.”

for the rest of the journey, it was quiet.

sundown came, and you found yourselves in a convenience store for that night’s shelter. jacob was in charge of taking the night shift, allowing you and kevin to rest up. when the stranger went off to sleep on the makeshift bed, you were left alone with jacob.

you watched how he cleaned his gun with a rag stained with dark splotches. the moon gleamed through the window—it cannot compare to how jacob shines.

you needed to get some sleep is what you tell yourself. with one spin, you were about to make your way to where you’d sleep for that night.

“are we really not?” you halted in your tracks. you couldn’t look at him. “did it mean nothing?”

not a single answer left your mouth. your eyes remained straightforward, refusing to meet his gaze.

the warmth vanished with a lack of an answer. instead, it was replaced once more with the cold—the void—that attempted to consume you whole.

and when a scornful chuckle left jacob, you knew that you’d burnt the bridge. you walked away, leaving him to do his job, bidding farewell to the closest form of a safe haven.

two weeks went by, and another goodbye had to be done. kevin stood in front of you two, a grin on his lips while tears streamed down his face. his arm was out, revealing a bite mark. the veins near the wound had already turned black. he would’ve turned in a few hours.

“go out.” those were jacob’s first words to you since that night in the convenience store.

you remember the last thing you told kevin before you left the room—you’ll get to your safe haven. the sobs that spilled out of him are ones you’ll never forget. and when you shut the door behind you, it took 20 seconds until you heard a gunshot. 

the weight got heavier once more.

another two weeks went by, and you and jacob found yourselves standing in front of the remains of a safe haven. the fences were torn down. streaks of dark red littered over pavements. not a single sight of a soul lived.

still, you two trudged your way through the town, all the way until you reached jacob’s house. like others, his was abandoned. the cream walls were littered with red strokes and vines. when you both entered, you didn’t miss how jacob’s eyes lingered on a photo hung on the wall—a picture of him, his brother, and his parents.

you gave him all the time he needed to explore, to sit with the mess, while you stayed in the living room. as you sat on the couch that had gathered dust, you caught sight of a bowl of plastic produce that rested on the coffee table. it held a variety of fruits whose paint had chipped: watermelon, chestnut, and fig.

but amidst the crowd of old, torn-down, plastic fruits, a pear and an orange leaned against each other as grime collected on them. once your hands reached out to the fruits, you pulled them apart—a mess of green and orange stained the two.

he came back to you in 30 minutes, eyes glistening with tears. yet, he only gave you a nod, and you two went to another house. 

you then stood in front of your old house with jacob by your side. weeds grew in the front yard, and the wooden exterior has turned a few shades darker. silence settled between you two. 

to be back in a place you grew up in, where all your memories live, is a process—a grieving one. being face-to-face with the damage brought by the infected can only remind you of what you had and could’ve had.

and once you made your way to your childhood room, you were reminded of all your hopes and dreams before the outbreak. dust rested on top of books. the laptop on your desk had no charge. potted plants have withered.

when you approached the picture frames found on your table, your hand darted out to a photograph of you and hyunjae. there was no occasion when that picture was taken—the fact that you two were together was enough for it to be remembered. memorialized.

as you made your way back down the stairs, you saw jacob crouched in front of the console table with eyes. trained on photographs. “was this your high school graduation?” you approached him and saw the picture he was referring to, you who stood beside hyunjae with a big grin as his lips were on your temple.

“yeah,” you said as you crouched beside jacob. “we knew each other back when i was a freshman.” your fingers trailed on the wooden frame, gathering the dust before flicking it away. despite your efforts, it was still covered in grime, but you didn’t mind. 

“and you stayed together since?” all you did was hum. “did you find anything up there?”

for the first time since you entered your old house, you looked at jacob and he met your gaze. your eyes trailed his features. the eyes that speak of a thousand words. the lips that once kissed yours.

and it hit you like the gunshot that filled your ears, the breeze that rustled the leaves that one night, the doors that shut close. it was 20 months since the outbreak happened, 13 months since you lost hyunjae, and 11 months since changmin told you his last words—but it was also 13 months spent with jacob, choosing to survive with him. 

“yeah.”

you found a lot of things within those four walls. there were books you once read growing up, stuffed toys you slept with, and the one picture of you and hyunjae; they’re the remaining pieces you have left of a life that was good.

you would’ve kept it all, rebuilt the life that was ripped away by the hands of the infected—

“but nothing to hold on to.”

they’re memories, ones you’ll carry with you, but ones worth moving on from. 

“oh,” he said as his eyes still held your gaze. “okay.”

and with one exhale, you said, “let’s rebuild it, just a place for us two.”

it was a whirlwind of emotions in jacob’s eyes, ones you can’t identify. for a moment, you thought he’d say no. maybe he decided that 13 months was enough. one more day with you would be too much, and—

“okay.” when his hand reached out for yours, linking fingers with you like all other times, you gave him a small smile.

when you and jacob stood up, you made your way out of the house, off to find a place just for you two—a safe haven to last you many tomorrows with him.

a month passed. the safe haven was rebuilt; the fences stood strong with electrical wires and barbed wires, and the town was cleaned of all remnants of grime and blood. the two of you took up different tasks ranging from cleaning, cooking, building, and maintaining the haven.

but while you were okay with a knife, accidents did happen. “fuck!”

“what happened?” you remember how jacob came rushing in, only to see you pressing on the skin around the cut on your finger.

before you knew it, you were sitting down with him as he wrapped gauze around the wound. “jacob, it’s just a cut. i’ll be fine.”

“still, i don’t want you getting hurt.” you watched how his eyes were focused on treating your finger. “i’ll be in charge of cooking now.”

you shook your head. “no, i like to cook. i want to cook for us.” his gaze then met yours, his filled with worry while yours filled with determination. they flickered back to your finger, and his hands busied themselves with covering it up.

once he was done, his hand continued to hold yours. you remember the heat of his thumb as it drew patterns on your hand. he’s etched himself onto you.

his eyes met yours once more, and he said, “okay, just let me help out.” all you gave him was a nod.

another month went by, and you woke up to the sound of gunshots. you remember how hazy your vision was that night, fresh from sleep but panic coursing through your veins. and when you looked beside you to only see an empty spot, you didn’t think twice about rushing out of bed.

when you exited the house, you saw jacob holding his gun, firing at the people who attempted to tear down the haven’s fences. “jacob!” when he looked back at you, you caught sight of the crimson that poured out of his abdomen.

another gunshot was fired, grazing jacob’s leg, and he fell to his knees. you ran to him, reaching out to rest your hand on the wound as you began to sob. “fuck! you have to stay with me.” with his arm resting around your shoulders, you dragged him back to the house.

you set him on the table and moved his hand to hold where he was shot. “hold it.” you rushed to where the medical supplies were stored and gathered whatever you could hold. when you got back, you saw how blood continued to spill out.

you got to work, focused on trying to patch him up—making sure he stays. “you can’t go. i won’t let it happen.” and while your hands busied themselves with treating the injury, you remember how jacob’s hand caressed your cheek, thumb wiping away the spilled tears. 

“in the basement, there’s a piece of paper that has all the codes. if you ever—”

“no, you’ll be okay.”

still, he continued to talk. “if you ever forget the codes, you can always look at the paper. don’t forget that you need to always check the water system every two days, and—”

“jacob!” you croaked out his name in between sobs. “you’ll be okay. you have to, okay?” the more he went on about what to keep in mind, the baggage got heavier. “i can’t do this without you. i won’t allow it.”

because 15 months ago, you would’ve bid farewell to the mayhem. 13 months ago, you hoped for time to drag you away. 12 months ago, you would’ve walked into the forest. but it’s been 22 months, and you were still walking on this earth, choosing to live amidst the chaos—so long as jacob was with you. 

and when you leaned your forehead on his, eyes closed, you felt his breath graze against your lips. “i need you.”

all it took were three words from you. “okay.”

it’s been two months since that happened. the safe haven was rebuilt once more. you and jacob fortified the defense system, hoping they’ll be enough to keep any infected and raiders out. all that matters is that you two were protected—safe—from the chaos.

now, you sit on a couch as you flip through the pages of a book you didn’t have time to read before the outbreak. when all responsibilities vanished, you were able to find enough time to do things you couldn’t do then.

you were ready to get yourself sucked into the world of the novel, but jacob came into the living room with his hands behind his back and a small smile on his lips. “do you remember what you made me promise you before?”

you frown at him, confused, until he shows you an acoustic guitar. “oh my god, you found one?” you put the book on the coffee table.

he takes a seat beside you, body facing towards you as he rests the instrument on his lap. “here, first-row tickets to my first show.” you almost laughed because this is no stadium or club, but a home—one you built with him.

it takes only one smile from him for you to hold it back.

“any song requests?” he strums on the guitar strings, perfectly in tune. it’s almost as if he tuned it before coming to you.

a hum leaves you as you rest your head on your hand propped on the couch. “whatever you want to show me.”

it takes him a few seconds, fingers fiddling with the strings, until he figures out what to play. when he sings out the words—dearest, darling, my universe—you melt like the candles you lit up those nights. as he continues to play a song of a world in hysteria but a love that endures, that’s when you realize what you’ve had all this time.

time is the one thing that occupies your mind. it holds value, something that shouldn’t be wasted, and you learned to revolve your life around it.

it takes you two years to figure out that life doesn’t end after the outbreak—and 17 months to realize that your safe haven is not a two-story house with an orange tree in the garden but the boy in front of you.

when you lean closer to him, his fingers falter, messing up the chords. your hand reaches out to caress his face as your eyes flicker to his lips. you don’t miss how jacob holds his breath, how he stops playing the guitar, how his eyes look back at yours—it’s a slurry of warmth, tenderness.

“i love you.”

all it took was a three-word phrase from you for him to close the distance.

the warmth that spreads within you is like the one you experience in the abandoned cabin. but now, you’re full of hope—a reason to stay—in an infected-ridden world.

now, only one question echoes within your mind: how much longer do we have?

an eternity is what you hope.

perma taglist ➵ @deoboyznet @kflixnet @blankjournal @winterchimez @miusgirl @jenoscafe @sweet-unicorn-world @vernyangel @mosviqu @stealanity @deobi0412 @blue-rainydays @maessseongs

#works of moni #deoboyznet #kflixnet #bjnet #k-labels #the boyz #jacob bae #the boyz x reader #jacob bae x reader #the boyz fluff #the boyz angst #jacob bae angst #jacob bae fluff #lee hyunjae #lee hyunjae x reader #lee hyunjae angst #lee hyunjae fluff

[viastro]

dynasty | lee jaehyun

ミ★ synopsis: as the university’s part-time librarian, you didn’t expect to develop a relationship with the guy that likes to skip lecture in order to take a nap in the library instead. and as the bad boy of the university, hyunjae had never crossed paths with you until he started sleeping in the library—so he can’t explain why you’re so familiar to him.

ミ★ genre: reincarnation!au, badboy!hyunjae, librarian!reader, angst, some fluff, some humor

ミ★ warnings: major character death, depictions of violence, mentions of blood

ミ★ word count: 20,800

ミ★ pairings: hyunjae x gender neutral reader

ミ★ notes: happy very belated birthday to my soulmate and best friend, @sunlightwoo​ this oneshot took me an incredibly long time to write and it’s quite ridiculous how long it ended up becoming... but i really hope you love it <3 i love you so much gina, thank you for everything <3

ミ★ taglist: @sunlightwoo @junjungsunwoo @woozisnoots @w8nuzone @miyuuraiura @sbnchaos @mybbtaeyong4thewin​

“Please. You can take me, but not him. He has nothing to do with this.” You beg the soldier, falling to your knees without a second thought as you plead. The commander stares down at you, and you watch as the corner of his lips quirks upwards in amusement. 

“Oh, Midnight.” He says in a sweet tone, and your eyebrows furrow in confusion, only for your blood to run cold when you see his hand wrap around the gun in his pocket. 

“How bold of you to think that I would have mercy on a thief.” 

You gasp awake, the sound of the gunshot ringing in your ears as you blink up at the ceiling. You’re drenched in sweat, making you recoil in slight disgust as you groggily sit up in your bed. You look out the window, seeing the sky that’s still full of stars, signaling that you have a long time until you need to wake up for your lectures in the morning.

You shake your head, reaching up and resting a hand over your forehead as you let out a shaky breath. 

“What a weird dream.”

You push the cart full of books down the aisle, looking through the shelves to see where to place the book in your hand. A quiet, ah, escapes your lips when you discover its place, and you quickly put the book back in its rightful spot on the shelf. Smiling to yourself, you push the cart out of the aisle to head back towards the front desk.

You glance over towards the study tables, seeing the familiar groups of faces of students who enjoy going to this library to study. You slowly come to a stop when you see an unfamiliar body slumped over one of them, and you frown slightly at the sight. Looking around, you see no one even sparing a glance towards them, and you bite your bottom lip. You tentatively walk over, and gently knock your hand on the table as a means to wake them. 

Only to blink when they don’t move at all.

Pursing your lips, you step around so that you’re standing where their head is facing, and you pause when you finally lay eyes on the man. 

His eyelashes are long, resting beautifully on the tops of his cheeks as he breathes softly. From the slope of his nose, to his pretty cupid's bow—you find yourself in a state of awe at the beauty of this man. There’s also the smallest inkling you feel within your chest as you stare at his sleeping face, and you wonder why you can’t help but think he looks a bit familiar.

“I’ll let him sleep.” You say quietly, thinking that he must be rather tired to have decided to take a nap in the University library. Turning around, you walk away from the man and go back to your cart. You push it to the front desk, and plop down into your seat behind it. Letting out a breath, you turn on the computer to begin a new round of solitaire.

“Dude, where were you? I was saving the seat beside me cause you said you’d come to lecture today.” Juyeon asks when Hyunjae walks up to him sitting on the bench. He lets out a yawn and shrugs his shoulders, scratching the back of his neck as he replies, “I didn’t wanna fall asleep during class, so I took a nap in the library instead.” 

Juyeon’s eyes soften a bit at the news, “You still having trouble sleeping?” 

Hyunjae nods his head, adjusting Juyeon’s backpack strap for him as they begin to walk out of the quad. He looks off to the side with a sigh, thinking of how he suddenly went from being able to have a dreamless sleep, to having sleepless nights due to dreams that he can never remember. 

“I think you should go see someone so that they can prescribe you something. The melatonin gummies aren’t working for you, so this would be the next step.” Juyeon says, and Hyunjae purses his lips at the thought of having to take sleeping pills just to get a good night’s rest. 

“It happened randomly, so I’ll probably be able to sleep normally at a random time too.” Hyunjae reasons, and Juyeon frowns at his friend’s stubborn nature. He nudges his shoulder, and Hyunjae lets out a chuckle at the blonde’s concern for him. 

“I’m okay, Juyeon. This’ll pass.” Hyunjae tells him, and Juyeon just lets out a sigh of defeat as he just nods his head. Hyunjae places his arm over Juyeon’s shoulders, glad that he has such a good friend by his side. 

“Now that you’re done acting like a mother,” Hyunjae begins, and Juyeon scoffs at the term. “You wanna go to that party Haknyeon and Eric are hosting tonight?” 

He watches as the corner of Juyeon’s lips quirk upwards at the mention of a party, and he knows he’s got his best friend interested. As they begin talking about the plan for tonight, Hyunjae tries to ignore the heavy weight of exhaustion settled over his shoulders.

“Hi Kevin.” You greet your coworker as you walk past the desk to clock in. He gives you a smile, happy to see you after having not been scheduled together in a while. “Yn! I missed you.” 

“Missed me? You just missed working with me since I put away all the books for you.” You tease with a grin, and he immediately begins to protest as you laugh quietly. While the two of you talk, your attention is caught by someone walking past the front desk with his airpods in his ears. 

You take notice of the bags under his eyes in the brief glance you get of his face, and your eyes widen when you suddenly recognize him as the guy who took a nap on one of the study tables from the week before. 

“And that’s how I got Jacob to curse for the first time. Was definitely something I never want to experience again, but I’m glad I scratched it off the bucket list.” Kevin finishes as he scans another book, looking up at you to catch your reaction, only to see you distracted. His eyes follow your gaze, and he almost chokes when he realizes just who you’re so distracted by. 

“Don’t tell me you have a crush on him too.” He whines, and your head snaps back towards Kevin. “Huh?”

He gestures in the direction the guy went, and you raise an eyebrow, “Do you know him?” 

Kevin just gives you a deadpan stare, and you blink, wondering if you asked the wrong thing. He chuckles and shakes his head, handing you a book to place on the cart. Taking it from his grasp, he begins to explain, “I can’t believe that you actually live under a rock.”

“Hey!”

“He’s my friend, and he’s well known at our uni cause he’s a handsome ass bitch. Some students like to call him a bad boy since he drives a motorcycle and doesn’t really talk to many people outside of our friend group, but I really think he’s the farthest thing from that.” Kevin explains with a giggle, and you find yourself wondering how you never knew any of this information when you and Kevin are besties at work.

You glance over in his direction, finding him fast asleep over one of the study tables once again. There’s an indecipherable emotion that tingles within your chest as you stare at his slumped over figure, and you question why you’re so intrigued by a man that you’ve never once shared an interaction with.

“What’s his name?” You ask in a soft voice, choosing to ignore the thought in your brain as you turn back towards your friend. He looks at you with a knowing smile, and he just lets out a breath as he hands you another book.

“Hyunjae. His name is Lee Hyunjae.” 

It’s a few hours into your shift when you begin putting the books back into their respective places on the shelves. This is probably your favorite thing to do while working at the library because you’ve always enjoyed organizing, and this is the epitome of that. 

Pushing your cart to the next aisle, you briefly look up towards the study tables, only to blink in surprise when you find Hyunjae still fast asleep on the table. Glancing down at your watch, you see that it’s already 6 o’clock in the evening. 

“He’s been sleeping there this whole time?” You murmur as you look at him from the bookshelves. Pursing your lips, you glance around, seeing a few students minding their own business as they study at their own respective tables. You look back in his direction one more time, before letting out a breath and pushing the cart in his direction.

You wonder why you’re so entranced by him, a man you’ve never met nor spoken to once in your life. Since the day you saw him asleep in the library for the first time, you felt yourself gravitate towards him, and you don’t even know why.

Is it because he’s handsome? Because you found it funny that he had come to the library just to sleep? You’re not sure.

But as you bend down so that you’re eye-level with his sleeping face, you still can’t figure out the answer. 

Standing back up, you reach out and gently tap his shoulder. When he doesn’t even shift slightly, you bite the inside of your cheek. You gently tap his shoulder again, “Excuse me? Sir?”

You watch as his eyebrows furrow at your voice. Moving to tap him again, you stop when his eyes slowly begin to open. He blinks tiredly, confused as to what’s going on around him as he gets used to the light flooding his vision. Letting out a quiet yawn, he turns his head in your direction, only to pause when he realizes there’s someone standing beside him.

His gaze slowly trails up towards your face, and he feels his breath get taken away when he locks eyes with you. Your eyes sparkle underneath the light as you look at him with a small amused smile, and he can only blink at the sight as a question suddenly comes to mind.

am i… in heaven? 

“Hi, I’m really sorry to have woken you up from your nap. It’s just that you’ve been sleeping here for the last three hours, and I feel like you would be much more comfortable in your own bed.” You explain, warmth flooding your face as you speak because oh God you’re shy. He can only stare at you in silence, making you wonder if you made the right decision as you look back at him with increasing anxiety. 

He blinks, before looking down at the table where he’s been sleeping this whole time. He lets out a quiet chuckle, reaching up and running a hand through his hair as he stands up from the chair. He picks up his backpack and throws it over his shoulder, looking back at you with an apologetic smile. 

“I’m sorry about that.” He says, and you immediately raise your hands towards him and shake them. “No! It’s okay! Really, I just woke you up because I would rather you be comfortable in a bed rather than an old wooden chair and a table.” 

His eyes bore into yours, and you can only look back into his as the sound of your own heartbeat floods your ears from how handsome he is. You watch as a small smile forms on his face, and he reaches out towards you with his hand. 

“My name is Lee Hyunjae.” 

Glancing down at his hand, a soft laugh escapes you as you reach out and take hold of it. Looking back up into his eyes, you smile as you say, 

“My name is yn yln.” 

Hyunjae feels his heart pang against his chest when your name leaves your lips, a lump forming in his throat as he stares at your smiling face. Not wanting to appear affected, he gives you a grin and the two of you let go of each other’s hands. 

“Well, it was nice meeting you, yn.” Hyunjae tells you, and you nod your head with a warm face. “It was nice meeting you too, Hyunjae.”

And with that, you watch as the “bad boy” of the university turns around and walks away. Your eyes follow him until he’s out of sight, and a breath escapes you as you lean against the table. You raise your hands up to cup your warm face, thoughts running a mile a minute as the whole interaction continues to play in your head. 

While Hyunjae stops at the back of the library, resting his hand against the wall as he sucks in a shaky breath. Tears flood his eyes as he stares down at the ground, trying his best to hold them back. 

He doesn’t understand why he felt such a large feeling of sadness wash over him when you had said your name, or why he’s fighting back tears as he stands outside of the library. 

All he can really make sense of is that you have a beautiful smile.

“Jaehyun!” He turns at the call of his name, smiling brightly when he sees Hyunjun hurrying towards him with a loaf of bread he bought. He reaches out and wraps an arm around his friend’s shoulders once he’s close enough, ruffling his hair with his hand. “Did you make your move?” 

Hyunjun immediately shoots him a glare, nudging him in the stomach with his elbow. “No. I don’t know why you’re so fixated on me and the baker’s daughter.” 

“Cause it’s obvious that you have a crush on her.” He teases, to which he receives another jab to the stomach. He clutches his side, wincing in pain at Hyunjun’s sharp elbows as his friend chuckles. 

“We just did the usual, talking casually as she got me the loaf of bread I ordered. Nothing special.” Hyunjun explains with a soft smile, and he lets out a disappointed breath. “Tsk, thought I taught you better.” 

“The only thing you’ve taught me is that I should get better friends. Then again, I should’ve expected that the librarian who talks to books would be strange.”

“Hey! You know that books are precious! Take that back!” 

“No!” 

He’s about to put Hyunjun in a chokehold when a shoulder bumps into his own, causing him to take a step back. With a frown taking over his features, he turns his head to glance back at the person who bumped into him. His eyes slowly trail up from the ground and up their body, stopping at their lips when they begin to say:

“I’m sorry—”

Hyunjae blinks his eyes open, turning his head and squinting towards the sunlight that’s managed to peek through the sliver of his curtain. He lets out a groan, groggily rubbing his face as he sits up in his bed. Running a hand through his hair, he looks at the time and sees that it’s 8 am. 

“Four hours of sleep.” He murmurs, staring tiredly at his clock as he thinks of his schedule for the day. He has calc at 11:30, bio at 12:30, then he has that class he always skips at 1:30. Raising his hands up towards his face, he shuts his eyes as the growingly distant memory of his dreams play behind them. Lowering his hands, he lets out a sigh.

“Why do they feel so real?”

“Why are you at the library when you’re not even working today? It’s Friday, wouldn’t you rather be out having fun?” Kevin asks with a grin when you walk up to the counter. You shrug your shoulders, “Maybe because I’m a student that likes to study here? Besides, you know I’d rather hang out in the library.” 

Kevin chuckles, the sound making you smile as he gestures towards the study tables. “Whenever you feel like taking a break, come over here and talk to me. I’m on shift until 6.” 

You give him a thumbs up, “Of course! I’ll talk to you later.” 

After bidding Kevin goodbye, you walk towards the study tables in hopes that there’s one that’s empty. You do a quick scan for an available table, only for your eyes to stop on a familiar sight.

Hyunjae’s laid over the surface of a table, head resting on his arms that act as a pillow. His backpack is placed in the seat beside him, no laptop or journal taken out and on the table either. 

A small smile forms on your face as you make your way over to where he’s seated. Biting the inside of your cheek, you slowly bend down so that the two of you are face to face. Your eyes roam over his features, and you quietly wonder how he can sleep so soundly over an uncomfortable surface like this. 

You’re about to stand back up when his eyes slowly blink open, and you’re rendered frozen in place when his eyes bore into yours. 

“Yn?”

You quickly take a step back, nervous chuckles escaping you as he tiredly sits up from his original position. Rubbing his eyes, he looks at you with a curious gaze, “How long were you watching me like that?”

You blink, “Oh, you know. A couple seconds or so…” 

Hyunjae gazes at you for a moment longer, before a small smile forms on his lips. Shaking his head, he covers his mouth to let out a yawn as you awkwardly stand in front of him. You suck in a deep breath before gesturing over to the two empty chairs in front of him.

“Can I sit with you?” 

The two of you stare at each other for a second, with regret slowly inching up your throat the longer you wait for his answer. Clenching your fists at your sides, you’re about to tell him that you’ll find another table when he finally responds, “Yeah, of course you can sit with me.” 

The corners of your lips tilt upwards, and you nod your head. Stepping over to the chairs across from him, you pull out the seat and sit down. Putting your bag down in the chair beside you, you pull out your laptop and open it up, preparing to get to work.

Hyunjae quietly watches you as you do this, admiring the way the sunlight peeks in through the windows and hits your face as you reach for your headphones. He wonders why you had chosen to sit with him when there were other tables that are also only occupied by one person. 

“You’re not working today?” Hyunjae asks right before you’re about to put in an earbud, and you nod your head. “Today’s my day off, but I still need to write an essay.”

“For what class?”

“Multicultural History. I was given a specific timeline and I basically just need to write about it for seven pages.” You explain with a sigh, watching as the latter cringes at how much you need to write. A small giggle escapes you at his reaction, and Hyunjae’s eyes sparkle at the sound. 

“You can continue your nap, I just didn’t feel like sitting alone.” You tell him with a smile, and he nods. Moving to rest his head on his arms, he stops right before he closes his eyes and looks back at you. You tilt your head at his sudden pause, only for warmth to flood your face when he says,

“Whether you’re working or not, you can always come sit with me.” 

And with that, Hyunjae lowers his face into his arms to take another nap. While you just sit there in shock, letting his words sink in as you stare at the pretty man with warm cheeks.

It’s a couple of hours later when Hyunjae finally wakes up, and he slowly blinks his eyes open as he sits up properly in his seat. Running a hand through his hair, he starts to yawn when your voice quietly greets him, “Good morning.” 

He looks at you with an amused look in his eyes, and you grin back at him before glancing back at your laptop screen and typing away. Stretching his arms over his head, he gazes at the clock on the wall and sees that it’s now 7 pm. 

He turns back to you, and reaches out and taps the top of your laptop. Halting your typing, you pause your music and pull out an earbud, “Mm?” 

“Are you hungry? It’s around dinner time.” Hyunjae asks, and your eyebrows furrow. Your eyes dart down to the time on your screen, and you blink in surprise when you see that it’s already 7 at night. “Oh shit.” 

He chuckles at how you sound when you curse, having only heard you be soft spoken in the times the two of you interacted. You give him a smile and reach a hand up to scratch the back of your neck, not realizing how long you’ve been working on your essay. 

“I didn’t know that much time had passed.” You mutter shyly, and Hyunjae nods his head in agreement. Pressing your lips into a thin line, you gently shut your laptop and slip it into its sleeve, before beginning to pack the rest of your stuff. 

Hyunjae watches you quietly as he stands up from the table. A question comes to mind as he throws his bag over his shoulder, and he lets out a breath while he looks at you. “Do you want to go to the convenience store together?” 

You physically halt your movements right as you’re about to put your laptop into your bag, and slowly turn your head towards Hyunjae. “Heh?”

A small smile forms on his face at your reaction, and he tilts his head to the side, “Should I take that as a no?”

Your eyes widen and you immediately lift your hands up to him, “No!” 

“No?”

“I mean, no as in, no you shouldn’t take that as a no.” You panic, and Hyunjae bites back a laugh. Blinking your eyes, you let out a quiet cough and promptly place your laptop in your bag, before zipping it up and throwing it over your shoulder. “R-Ramen, shall we?” 

Hyunjae nods his head, amusement dancing in his eyes as the two of you walk side-by-side to the exit. You glance over towards the front desk, seeing that Kevin has long been replaced by your other coworker since he got off an hour before. 

“Damn, Kevin left already.” Hyunjae points out once you both reach the doors, and you nod as you each walk out. “He got off at 6, and now he’s probably going to be petty with me since I didn’t take a break to go talk to him.”

Hyunjae chuckles, already imagining what the latter would complain about. “Sounds like Kevin.” 

A comfortable silence falls over the two of you as you head in the direction of the convenience store. Your eyes look over the scenery of the trees and the remnants of the sunset as you smile softly to yourself, while Hyunjae takes small glances at you, wondering how he can feel so comfortable walking in silence with a person he hardly knows.

“Did you finish writing your essay?” Hyunjae asks you after a moment, and you turn to him with an embarrassed smile. Rubbing the back of your neck, you let out a sigh, “No, not yet. I still have to write two more pages and then edit everything.” 

“You sound disappointed by that.” Hyunjae points out, and you nod your head with a slight pout to your lips. 

“I just wish I was more productive. Normally, I would’ve been able to finish writing seven pages easily, but I guess I was having an off day today.” You explain with a chuckle, but it slowly dies out when you don’t receive an immediate response. Turning your head to glance at the pretty man, you find him looking at you with a small smile on his face. He lets out a low whistle and turns away once he realizes that he’s just been staring, and you look down at the ground.

“I think you accomplished a lot during the time that you were working on it, so don’t be too hard on yourself for those last two pages.” Hyunjae tells you, and you bite the inside of your cheek at his words. There’s a sense of comfort that fills your heart, overtaking the slight disappointment you had originally felt. 

Turning to him, you let out a giggle as you ask, “How about you? How was your nap?”

Hyunjae blinks at the question, before laughing quietly and nodding. “It was alright, felt nice knowing that I had someone to protect me while I was sleeping.” 

He pauses after the sentence leaves him, and he tilts his head as he questions why he feels so weird. It’s only a second later when a brief memory suddenly comes to mind,

He lays on the grass, looking up at the blue sky as the heat from the sun lays over him like a warm blanket. Feeling a pair of eyes on him, he lets out a quiet chuckle, “Mm?”

“What?” The voice asks, and he smiles to himself, knowing that they’re trying to play it off as if he didn’t catch them. “You were staring.” 

“I was just making sure you were safe.” They respond, and he laughs. 

“What! What’s so funny about that?” 

“Why would there be danger in this field of grass that’s far away from the city? Trust me, I’ve been going here since I was a child. No one knows of this place except you and me now.” He explains, only to hear a quiet chuckle in response. Turning to glance at them, their features remain a blur as the sun appears from behind their head, rendering their face unrecognizable. He blinks when their hand suddenly reaches out and rests on Hyunjae’s head, gently patting his hair as they say in a soft voice,

“No matter where you are, or where you go, I’ll be by your side to protect you.” 

Hyunjae sucks in a sharp breath once the memory disappears, making you turn towards him with a look of concern on your face. His eyes are wide as he stares down at the ground while the two of you walk, and you notice how pale his skin has become. 

You stop walking and gently grasp his wrist, making him halt his movements. “Hyunjae, are you okay?”

He turns his head and looks back at you, just to find you looking at him with worry etched over your features. Biting the inside of his cheek, he tries to shake off the initial shock he felt when the memory came to mind, as this has never happened while he was awake. 

You watch as he finally gives you a smile, acting as if everything’s okay as he answers, “I’m alright, just remembered that I have to work on homework tonight.” 

You stare at him for a moment longer, before nodding your head and letting go of his hand. The two of you aren’t close enough for you to ask him more, and you can already see that he doesn’t want to talk about it further. “Understandable. It’s kinda like a jumpscare.” 

He chuckles and smiles in agreement as you begin to walk again, completely dropping the topic of whatever it was that bothered him. When you draw closer to the convenience store, you can’t help your curiosity as you turn to him again, “Why do you sleep in the library almost everyday? If you don’t mind me asking.” 

Hyunjae doesn’t look surprised at the question, since he expected that you would probably ask him at some point. However, he doesn’t answer it until the two of you reach the entrance to the store, and he pulls open the door and holds it open for you.

Giving you a small smile, he finally responds, “I don’t really care for my technical writing class.” 

Hyunjae heads towards the library with a little skip in his step, heart feeling warm in his chest as he thinks of seeing you again. The last time he saw you was a couple days ago when the two of you went to the convenience store together, since he didn’t need to go to the library due to it being the weekend. 

“So you just go to the library to skip class and take a nap?” You ask with a hint of disbelief in your gaze as you step inside. Hyunjae nods his head with a quiet chuckle, closing the door and walking beside you towards the aisle of ramen. 

“Why don’t you just go back to your apartment and take a nap then? The library tables can’t be more comfortable than your own bed.” You say as you reach out and pick up a shin ramen, and Hyunjae just shrugs his shoulders. He picks up the neoguri ramen, feeling a slight weight over his shoulders as the real reason why he goes to the library remains in the back of his mind.

“I find that sleep comes easier at the library than it does at home.”

Just as Hyunjae’s about to push open the doors to the library, he lets out a yelp when his backpack is suddenly tugged from behind, yanking him backwards. 

“WHAT THE FUCK?!” Hyunjae exclaims when he tries to glance back, only to be dragged away from the library and down the steps. Once they’re at the bottom of the stairs, the person finally lets go, and Hyunjae turns around to start shouting at them, only to stop.

He lets out a sigh, “God damn it, Juyeon.” 

“We’re going to class together, whether you like it or not.” Juyeon says with a big smile. Hyunjae groans when Juyeon wraps an arm around his shoulders, beginning to bring him in the direction of their building. 

Hyunjae steps out from under Juyeon’s arm and points towards him, “I’m not going. I have my daily nap to attend to and that is much more important than technical writing.” 

Juyeon squints at Hyunjae, making the latter look away and over to the library to avoid eye contact. The blonde continues to analyze his friend, before letting out a sigh of disappointment and shaking his head. 

“Instead of taking you to class, should I take you to the hospital to finally get sleeping medicine instead?” Juyeon asks, a stern expression on his face. Hyunjae just presses his lips into a thin line, “You sound like a mother.” 

“Would you rather have Sangyeon scold you? You can hardly sleep at your own apartment, you skip class, and go to the library not to study—but to sleep.” Juyeon says, making Hyunjae glance down at the ground. Juyeon stares at him for a moment longer, before looking away and running a hand through his hair. 

“I’m just worried about you.” 

“I know, but I’m fine. I’m not even failing the class either! I’m just going through a slump right now, but I should be able to sleep normally after it’s over.” Hyunjae explains earnestly, hoping that this will appease him so that he doesn’t have another thing to stress about. Juyeon reaches out and pats Hyunjae’s shoulder, “Okay, but you’re still going to class with me.”

“Oh hell no.”

“Professor is having us choose our partners for the group project that’s due at the end of the quarter and I need you there.” Juyeon says, before wrapping his arm around the back of Hyunjae’s neck and beginning to drag him towards the building of their classroom again. 

“But—”

“No buts! It’s just for today, the professor needs to know that I have a partner so that I don’t end up working with some stranger.” 

Hyunjae fails to come up with an excuse to skip this lecture and go to the library instead. He lets out a sigh of defeat as he gets dragged away, knowing that he should at least attend this section for the sake of his project. Taking a quick glance back at the library, he bites the inside of his cheek at the thought of you possibly waiting for him.

I’ll go see you later, yn.

You push the cart full of books past the aisles, looking at the study tables as you walk by, but failing to see that familiar slumped over figure. Pursing your lips, you shake your head and turn into the non-fiction aisle.

“Why do I feel a bit disappointed? I should be happy that he went to class.” You mutter, picking up a book and placing it into its designated spot. Doing a quick onceover of the shelf, you catch sight of a book that’s not meant to be in this aisle. 

“Why would someone put Frog and Toad next to Stephen Hawking?” You ask yourself as you reach out and take it out of the shelf, only to lock eyes with someone in the next aisle. You blink in surprise, only for a smile to immediately take over your features when you recognize them.

“Lee Hyunjae!” You whisper-shout, and he waves at you with a grin. He holds up something in a plastic bag, and you raise an eyebrow at him, before gesturing for him to come into your aisle. Giving you a thumbs up, he disappears from sight and appears by your side a few seconds later.

“Where were you?” The question falls past your lips without a second thought, and you just as quickly turn around and slap yourself on the forehead. Hyunjae bites the inside of his cheek to hold back his laughter, watching as you eventually turn back around to face him with an embarrassed grin. 

He leans against the shelf, a smirk on his lips when he asks, “Were you waiting for me?” 

“No!” You exclaim, only to flinch back when you receive a few shushes from those who are studying. You do a quick bow in their direction, having forgotten that you’re in a public library as you turn back to Hyunjae with regained composure. “No. I just noticed that you weren’t at one of the study tables.” 

“Ah.” Hyunjae says, and you let out a breath of relief. 

“So you were looking for me?” He teases, and you press your lips into a thin line. He lets out a quiet laugh and waves his hand at you to signal that he’s just joking around, before lifting up the bag that you now realize holds a container of takeout food. 

“What’s this? Are you having dinner here? You know that you can’t eat in the library—”

“It’s for you.” Hyunjae interjects, and you stare at him, mouth still open as the rest of the sentence remains lodged in your throat. He smiles, “I got you some kimchi jjigae since I know that you won’t be getting off shift until past dinner.” 

You continue to stare at him in shock, unable to formulate a response since you’re still trying to digest the fact that he went out of his way to buy you dinner. He reaches a hand up and waves it in front of your face, causing you to snap out of your daze.

“O-Oh God, sorry. I just… I can’t believe you got me food.” You laugh softly as you stare down at the bag of take out, and he grins. 

“I didn’t want you to have a late dinner.” He mutters in response, and you look up into his eyes. The two of you stare at each other in silence for a moment, with warmth flooding your face, and Hyunjae wondering if you can hear how hard his heart is beating against his chest.

“Thank you.” You say, and the corners of his lips quirk upwards as he nods. Without a second thought, he reaches out and grasps your hand, making your eyes widen in surprise. He lifts it up and faces your palm towards the ceiling, before repeating the action with your other hand. 

Before you can ask what he’s doing, he gently plops the bag of takeout into your hands. You look down at the container, then glance back up at his face, just to see the warm smile resting over his features as he stares into your eyes.

“Eat well, okay?” 

After nodding your head, he gives you one last grin, before turning around and walking out of the library. Your eyes trail after him, and once he’s out of sight, you glance down at the bag of takeout in your hands.

You let out a happy sigh, “He remembered that I work late tonight.”

“Why would a librarian have to work late at night?” A voice huffs from the next aisle, and Hyunjae chuckles at them. Taking a book off the shelf, he sees the back of the person’s head as they glance up at the other books. “Cause I’m the son of the family that owns this library, and that means I have to make sure all the books are in their designated spots.” 

“Pft. Still doesn’t mean you need to work late hours.” 

He turns the book over in his hand, and grins down at the cover. Letting out a breath, he walks over to the aisle the person’s in and stares at the back of their head as they’re crouched down to look at the books on the bottom shelf.

He lifts up the book in his hand, “Read this book.”

“Is it the bible?” They ask, making him roll his eyes. 

“Pride and Prejudice.” He answers, and he watches as they turn their head slightly. 

“Do you think I’d like it?” He stares at them for a moment, before chuckling and waving the book in his hand. “I wouldn’t have told you to read it if I didn’t think you wouldn’t like it.” 

They let out a soft laugh, a sound that makes his heart warm. 

“I guess I should read it then.” They say, before finally beginning to turn their head to look at him.

Hyunjae blinks his eyes open, a furrow to his brows as he slowly sits up from the table. He glances around the library, seeing that the afternoon sky had already turned dark during the time he was asleep. He sighs, “The dreams are haunting me even when I’m not at home.” 

Letting out a yawn, he turns his head just to find you putting a few books away in one of the aisles. A small smile forms on his lips, and he tiredly stands up from the table to walk over to you.

You quietly hum to yourself as you put another book onto the shelf, feeling a bit excited for your shift to be over since you’re hungry. You spare a glance in Hyunjae’s direction, expecting him to still be fast asleep over the table, only to blink in surprise when you don’t see him.

“Where’d he go?” You quietly ask yourself, moving to step out of the aisle and walk over towards the study tables when a hand suddenly grasps your wrist and spins you around.

You suck in a breath of surprise when you end up face to face with an amused looking Hyunjae. He takes a onceover of your features, watching as your initial shock slowly melts into shyness as you suddenly begin to avoid his gaze.

“Were you looking for me?” Hyunjae asks with a grin, and you bite the inside of your cheek. “Maybe.”

He chuckles and lets go of your hand, allowing you to finally breathe properly as you take a step back. Sucking in a few deep breaths, you shake your head and turn back towards the shelves with a shy smile. 

“How was your beauty sleep?” You ask as you reach for a book on the cart, to which Hyunjae takes it and places it into your hand. Giving him a grateful smile, you turn back towards the shelf and place it in its spot. 

“It was alright.” Hyunjae lies, but he notices the way you glance back at him with disbelieving eyes at his answer. He picks up another book and hands it to you so that you’ll look away from him, “It was.”

“I didn’t say it wasn’t.” You say in a sing-song voice as you place the book onto the shelf. Hyunjae squints at you, “Your eyes speak more words than you vocalize.” 

You purse your lips, wondering when the two of you became close enough for him to be able to read you so easily. Shaking your head, you’re about to turn towards the cart again, only to pause when the spine of a book catches your eye.

“Lee Hyunjae.” You murmur, and he raises an eyebrow. 

“Full naming me now, hm?” 

You chuckle, reaching out and taking the book from the shelf. You briefly flip through the pages, remembering how much you enjoyed this book when you were in high school. 

“Do you like books?” You ask, and Hyunjae pokes his tongue into the inside of his cheek at the question. He leans back against the shelf, “Not really, why?” 

“I just found my favorite book, and I wanted to ask you to read it.” You explain as you skim through one of the paragraphs, a small smile forming on your face. Hyunjae tilts his head, “What is it?” 

Shutting the book in your hands, you turn towards the pretty man and hold the book up towards his face. The cover of the story reflects from the light, and Hyunjae feels his heart stop when he reads the title.

“Pride and Prejudice.” You answer with a soft voice, watching as Hyunjae’s eyes get a faraway look to them as he stares at the old book.

He lifts up the book in his hand, “Read this book.”

“Is it the bible?” They ask, making him roll his eyes. 

“Pride and Prejudice.” He answers, and he watches as they turn their head slightly. 

“Do you think I’d like it?” He stares at them for a moment, before chuckling and waving the book in his hand. “I wouldn’t have told you to read it if I didn’t think you wouldn’t like it.” 

The memory of his dream flashes past Hyunjae’s eyes as questions flood his brain. He wonders what kind of a coincidence this could be, how this could possibly happen as he stares at the familiar cover of the classic story. 

At his silence, you glance at the book in your hand, before turning back towards him with an embarrassed smile, “You don’t like it?” 

Hyunjae blinks out of his daze, eyes meeting yours as you stare at him with concern written over your features. He shakes his head, reaching out and gently taking it from your grasp, “No! I just spaced out, sorry. I’ll definitely read it though.”

“Are you sure? You don’t have to read it if you don’t like reading—”

“It’s your favorite book, of course I have to read it.” Hyunjae cuts off, genuineness dripping from the sentence as he looks at you with fond eyes. You bite the inside of your cheek, warmth flooding your face as you nod. “Okay, tell me if you like it.” 

And Hyunjae stares at you for a moment longer, quietly wondering what his dreams mean as he nods his head with a smile that fails to reach his eyes.

“Of course, yn.”

“Why am I coming to the library?” Juyeon asks as he gets dragged up the steps, to which Kevin just huffs out a breath. 

“Cause I need you to see this.” 

“I have a class soon, though. Why not show Hyunjae? He’s probably already at the library considering this is the class he skips.” Juyeon points out when they enter the library. Kevin bites his bottom lip, bringing Juyeon over towards the bookshelves so they can hide properly as he mutters under his breath, “Cause he’s what you need to see.” 

Juyeon raises an eyebrow, “What?”

Kevin peeks past the bookshelf to make sure they have a good view, before tucking his head away. Turning towards Juyeon, he places both hands on his shoulders, making the latter squint at him in confusion. 

“Kevin…”

“Shh.” Kevin says as he maneuvers Juyeon over towards where he was standing, “Just look quietly.” 

Juyeon gives him another look, before peeking his head past the bookshelf, only for his eyes to widen in disbelief. 

Hyunjae’s seated at a study table, but he’s not sleeping like he always said he does. Instead, he’s talking to the person sitting across from him. 

Juyeon watches as Hyunjae smiles softly at whatever the person said, and his mouth drops open in shock when his friend even reaches out and pats their head fondly.

“No fucking way.”

“Yes fucking way.” Kevin says.

You look at Hyunjae with nothing but warmth in your eyes when he retracts his hand, and he can’t help but smile at the sight. Shaking your head with a quiet giggle, you glance at your laptop screen to see the grade of your essay staring back at you.

97/100

“Ah, I can’t believe they liked it that much.” You mutter, and Hyunjae scoffs jokingly. Looking up at him, you see the furrow to his brows as he points towards your laptop. “Of course they liked it that much. Don’t underestimate yourself, yn.” 

You attempt to fight the smile from forming on your face, but you fail. Turning away, your eyes fall on the bookshelves, only to blink in surprise when you see two heads peeking out. 

“Kevin?” 

“Oh shit.” Kevin breathes out when you make direct eye contact with him, and you squint at him. Hyunjae sees the change in your demeanor as you look away from him, and he turns towards the direction you’re staring in.

“Lee Juyeon?” 

“God damn it.” Juyeon states when Hyunjae sees him, and Kevin turns towards his friend with a frightened expression. “Should we run?” 

“Aren’t you on shift?” 

“I’m still on break for like, 15 minutes.” 

“Word.” Juyeon says, before nodding his head and sprinting to the exit with Kevin. You and Hyunjae watch as the two disappear from sight, and you let out a quiet chuckle when you hear the sound of the doors closing.

“I hate them.” Hyunjae deadpans, making you snort in response. Turning back towards your laptop, you gently close it and pack it into its sleeve. The black haired beauty watches you quietly as you do so, admiring your features with a hint of a smile.

“Do you wanna do something to celebrate?” He asks, and you look up at him with a raised eyebrow. “Celebrate what?” 

“Your grade.” Hyunjae responds, and you tilt your head. You had never celebrated getting a high grade or test score before since you’re usually busy, and you didn’t think it’s that big of a deal. However, with the way he’s looking at you with a proud expression, you find your heart swelling with pride. 

“Should we?” You ask with a growing smile, and he grins as he nods. 

“We should.” 

It’s only a few minutes later when you find yourself staring at the death contraption that Hyunjae uses as his vehicle of transportation that you slightly regret saying yes. The pretty man notices the apprehension in your body language, and he chuckles to himself. 

“What’s wrong?” Hyunjae asks, turning around so that he’s leaning back against his motorcycle and facing you. You gnaw on the inside of your cheek, before shyly pointing towards the bike, “Are we using this to get to the restaurant?”

Hyunjae spares a glance towards his motorcycle and nods his head, looking back at you with a grin, “Of course.”

Your eyes widen at his answer, and you immediately turn around to start walking back to the library. Hyunjae laughs and steps forward, grasping your wrist softly and spinning you around so that you’re facing him again.

His breath gets caught in his throat when he finds your face inches away from his own, having underestimated how close you were when he spun you. Warmth floods your face almost immediately at the close proximity between you two, unable to breathe as the two of you just stare at each other.

Hyunjae clears his throat after a moment and lets go of your wrist, and you quickly take a step back from him as you awkwardly cough into your elbow. Fighting back the blush that’s flooding his face, he reaches out and grabs his motorcycle helmet, before turning and holding it out to you.

“Do you trust me, yn?” Hyunjae asks, and you slowly nod your head. He smiles softly and wiggles the helmet towards you, “Then trust that I’ll protect you.” 

You don’t move to grab it, still feeling unsure of what to do as you stare down at the helmet. He lets out a breath after a moment, before shaking his head and stepping close to you again. Your eyes widen when he reaches up and gently places the helmet on your head for you, a smile escaping him as his fingers graze your chin while he buckles the straps.

“Don’t know how to put on a helmet?” He teases, to which you slap his arm in reply. He smiles before patting the top of your head and turning around towards his motorcycle. You watch as he throws one leg over, and glances at you as he starts the engine.

“You wanna walk to the place with the helmet on?” 

You squint at him, “You wouldn’t let me walk alone.”

Hyunjae stares at you for a moment, before nodding his head in agreement. Rolling your eyes, he laughs and pats the back of the seat. “Come on, you told me you trusted me.” 

You purse your lips, before letting out a sigh and stepping up to the motorcycle. Resting a hand on his shoulder, you carefully lift your leg up and place it on the other side of the bike. Hyunjae grins proudly and revs his engine, eliciting a squeal from you. 

“You might wanna hold on.” Hyunjae tells you, expecting you to argue with him. However, he’s shocked when you almost immediately wrap your arms around his waist, and he bites back a smile as a blush forms on his cheeks.

“Drive safely.” You say in a soft voice as you shut your eyes tightly, and the pretty man chuckles in response. 

“Anything for you, yn.”

Hyunjae steps out of the library with a tired sigh, making sure to lock the door behind him before walking down the quiet street.

The small thrum of disappointment lingers in his heart after having not seen them today, and he quietly wonders why they didn’t visit. Looking around, his eyes gaze over the closed shops as he walks.

“You! Stop there!”

His head snaps back when he hears the shout, and his eyes widen when he sees a figure dressed in black run out from around the corner and in his direction. The entire lower half of their face is covered in black silk, acting as a mask to hide their identity.

“Midnight.” He mutters when he realizes just who they are. The bandit that strikes at night, taking money from those who are well off and later giving it to the less fortunate communities. He’s never seen them, having only heard rumors about them, almost as if they were just a myth. 

But when he locks eyes with them, he notices their eyes widen in shock, and he tilts his head when he realizes.

Their eyes are familiar. 

Before he can open his mouth to say their name, they’re already running past him, but not without grabbing his wrist and yanking him backwards with them.

“Run!” Their voice exclaims, and he doesn’t need to be told twice. 

Removing his wrist from their grip, he quickly intertwines his fingers with theirs and ends up pulling the two of them forward. 

“Since when could you run fast!? Don’t you just take care of books all day?!?” Their voice rings out in surprise, and he lets out a scoff. 

“There’s much more shocking revelations that have occurred tonight!” He responds as he abruptly yanks them into an alleyway that he knows leads to a shortcut to his house.

“Do you workout in your spare time or something?!” 

Hyunjae just laughs and glances back at their covered face, “We have a lot to talk about, y-“

Hyunjae gasps awake right before he learns the name of the figure he’s been dreaming about. Letting out a groan, he rolls over in his bed and picks up his phone to check the time. Biting his bottom lip, he puts his phone back down and reaches up and covers his face. 

“Who are you?” Hyunjae whispers, feeling haunted by the mysterious figure he’s been dreaming about for months. 

Heaving a breath, he slams his hands onto his bed and stares up at the ceiling with a tired expression. The exhaustion weighs heavily over him, but he already knows that he won’t get a dreamless sleep if he attempts to sleep again.

“I guess I’ll make coffee.” Hyunjae murmurs, before rolling off of his bed and leaving his room. He walks past the bright clock that displays the time, but he chooses to ignore it.

He doesn’t want to get reminded that it’s only 3 in the morning. 

“So, anything for them, huh?” Kevin asks with a teasing smile, and Hyunjae just shoots him a glare from across the table. He reaches out to bonk his head with the book, only for Jacob to block it from hitting the blonde’s head. 

“No bonking.” Jacob states, and Hyunjae lets out a huff. Juyeon walks in from the kitchen holding a bowl of rice, and he raises an eyebrow at his friend’s squinted eyes.

“Are you that upset that you can’t see yn today?” Juyeon teases, making Hyunjae snap towards him. 

“Why is everyone teasing me about yn!?”

“Cause you’re in love with them.” Kevin responds, causing Jacob to let out a giggle and Juyeon to grin knowingly. Hyunjae lets out a sigh at their antics, pulling out his phone to see if he’s received any messages, just to put his phone back down when he sees texts from people he could care less about. 

“Damn, you got a shit ton of admirers.” Juyeon points out when he sees a glimpse of Hyunjae’s unread messages, and he shrugs his shoulders. “Don’t really care about them.”

Kevin leans close to Jacob and places his hand over his mouth to whisper in his ear. Hyunjae looks up to find the blonde staring directly at him as he whispers quite loudly, 

“It’s cause he only cares about yn~”

Hyunjae presses his lips into a thin line, before shaking his head and taking some rice from Juyeon’s bowl. Placing some into his mouth, he mutters, “I hate it here.” 

The sound of the door opening gathers the four’s attention, and they all let out a noise of greeting when Sunwoo walks in. The redhead grins and says hi, but a concerned expression takes over his features when he lays eyes on Hyunjae. 

Hyunjae blinks, “What?”

“Did you sleep at all last night?” Sunwoo asks as he sits in the seat beside him, and Hyunjae shakes his head with a pitiful smile. “Only got three hours, but that’s the norm.” 

They all exchange a glance before turning back towards their very sleep deprived friend, and Juyeon bites the inside of his cheek when he gets a better look at the dark bags under Hyunjae’s eyes. The black haired beauty sinks into his seat at all the eyes on him, and waves his hands towards his friends. 

“Guys, please. I’m used to it, don’t worry about it.” 

Just when Juyeon’s about to reply, a foot kicks Hyunjae in the shin, causing the latter to let out a shout of pain as he doubles over. Sunwoo’s eyes widen, and Jacob immediately asks if he’s okay, to which Hyunjae just lets out a quiet cry in reply. 

“Underestimated how hard I kick.” Kevin murmurs, which Hyunjae overhears and lifts up his head to shoot him a glare. Kevin gives him a sheepish smile, “Sorry about your shin, but—”

“There should be no buts in a good apology—”

“But yn’s studying at the library right now. Alone.” Kevin cuts off, and Hyunjae blinks at him with his mouth wide open. Jacob and Sunwoo exchange a glance before looking at Juyeon, who just has an amused look in his eyes.

After a moment of silence, Hyunjae places his hands on the table and stands up from his chair. He takes a look at his four friends, before giving them a grin and pointing towards the door.

“I-I’ve gotta, ya know, go…” 

The four share a look, one that basically says, get a load of this guy, before turning back to him and sending him a wave. 

“Have fun!”

“Drive safe.”

“Take them on a date after!” 

“Sleep well.” 

Hyunjae chuckles at their different responses as he slips on his shoes, shooting them all an excited smile as he waves his hand at them. 

“Text you guys later.”

They watch as he leaves the apartment, and Juyeon lets out a breath when the door shuts. Sunwoo turns towards the blonde, nudging him with his elbow to gain his attention. 

“You’re really worried about him, huh?” Sunwoo asks, and Juyeon nods his head. Turning to glance at the door, he purses his lips at the thought of how dark Hyunjae’s eyebags have gotten. 

“Ever since he began to go to the library, he’s started sleeping even less at night.”

Hyunjae walks through the entrance of the library, a smile threatening to form across his lips as heads in the direction of the study tables. Poking his head past the bookshelves, he glances around the library, looking for your pretty face.

He pauses when he sees not your face, but the back of your head as you’re slumped over the study table you’re seated at. He raises a hand up and covers his smile, holding back a laugh as he walks over to you quietly. 

He pulls out the chair perpendicular to you, and carefully sits down as a means to not make any noise. He grins at your sleeping face, not even acknowledging the dried drool on the corner of your lips. Biting his bottom lip, he scoots in a bit more and places his arm onto the table, before laying his cheek onto it so that he’s facing you.

His eyes trail over your features, and he quietly wonders how a person can be so painstakingly beautiful as he stares at your sleeping face. After a moment, Hyunjae feels himself beginning to grow more tired as he looks at you, and he struggles to keep his eyes open.

“Ah, they fell asleep again.”

Hyunjae opens his eyes when the beginning of the dream flashes behind his eyelids, the exhaustion weighing heavily over him. He fights to keep himself awake as he looks at you, for the sake of not having another dream again.

But he fails.

“Ah, they fell asleep again.” He murmurs as he walks up to the wooden table after putting back the last book on the shelf. Letting out an amused chuckle, he sits in the chair perpendicular to them and rests his cheek onto the surface of the table.

Staring at their sleeping face, he quietly wonders to himself why they’re able to sleep so well on such a hard surface. Pursing his lips at how uncomfortable he is, he adjusts himself so that his cheek is resting on his arm, now feeling a bit more comfortable.

Looking back at their face, his eyes trail over their features. From their eyelashes, to the slope of their nose, and to their lips.

“What a beautiful sight.” He whispers. He blinks in surprise when they suddenly begin to stir in their sleep, and he watches silently as their eyes begin to open.

Hyunjae jumps awake, feeling startled as he stares at your sleeping face. Panic floods his chest when he sees your eyebrows furrow and you begin to stir, but before he can sit up, your eyes slowly blink open. 

And his heart stops.

The visual of your eyes boring into his merges with the one from his dream, and suddenly all the memories of his past dreams with the faceless figure slowly become memories of you. He sucks in a breath and abruptly stands up from the chair, staring at you with wide eyes as you rub the back of your neck tiredly while you sit up. 

“Hyunjae, what’s wrong?” You ask when you finally take notice of his shellshocked appearance. He doesn’t respond though, just continuing to stare at you while his heart beats against his ears the longer he stays there. 

There’s no way, Hyunjae thinks to himself when your eyes grow with worry.

There’s no way that it’s you.

Your eyebrows furrow in concern, and you slowly stand up from your chair, “Hyunjae, are you okay?”

When you attempt to walk over, he quickly steps back and knocks over his chair. The loud thud of the chair rings throughout the quiet library, gathering the attention of other students as they look at what’s going on between you and the bad boy of the university.

You gulp, “Hyunjae?”

He blinks at you, before stepping past the table and sprinting out of the library without another word. Your mouth drops open in shock as you watch him leave, and you flinch when the sound of the door closing rings around the quiet space.

“What happened to make him react like that?” You ask yourself quietly, unable to forget the shock in his eyes as he looked at you. Biting the inside of your cheek, you gently pick up the chair that he knocked over and push it back into its spot. Walking back over to your seat, you sit down and stare at your open laptop. 

But you can’t find the motivation to continue what you were working on.

“Jaehyun!” He turns at the call of his name, smiling brightly when he sees Hyunjun hurrying towards him with a loaf of bread he bought. He reaches out and wraps an arm around his friend’s shoulders once he’s close enough, ruffling his hair with his hand. “Did you make your move?” 

Hyunjun immediately shoots him a glare, nudging him in the stomach with his elbow. “No. I don’t know why you’re so fixated on me and the baker’s daughter.” 

“Cause it’s obvious that you have a crush on her.” He teases, to which he receives another jab to the stomach. He clutches his side, wincing in pain at Hyunjun’s sharp elbows as his friend chuckles. 

“We just did the usual, talking casually as she got me the loaf of bread I ordered. Nothing special.” Hyunjun explains with a soft smile, and he lets out a disappointed breath. “Tsk, thought I taught you better.” 

“The only thing you’ve taught me is that I should get better friends. Then again, I should’ve expected that the librarian who talks to books would be strange.”

“Hey! You know that books are precious! Take that back!” 

“No!” 

Hyunjae’s about to put his friend in a chokehold when a shoulder bumps into his own, causing him to take a step back. With a frown taking over his features, he turns his head to glance back at the person who bumped into him. His eyes slowly trail up from the ground and up their body, stopping at their lips when they begin to say:

“I’m sorry—”

“Sir, there’s no trace of Midnight.” His attention is grabbed by the soldiers coming out from the alleyway a few feet away, and he raises an eyebrow at the mention of the night bandit. He turns back towards the person who bumped into his shoulder, and he notices the slight smirk on the corner of their lips as they stare at the ground.

“Are you okay?” He asks them, and their head snaps up towards him, and he feels his breath get taken away when they lock eyes with him.

“I should be asking you that, but yes, I’m alright. Are you okay? I’m sorry for bumping into you, I was in a rush.” They explain, but he can’t seem to get over the sparkles in their eyes as they look at him. A small smile appears on his lips, and he waves a hand at the pretty stranger in front of him.

“Don’t worry about it, but since you bumped into me, can I ask what your name is?” Hyunjun slowly raises a hand up to his mouth in shock at Hyunjae pulling a move, to which the latter elbows him in the stomach as a sign to stop. 

He watches as the corner of the stranger’s lips tilt upwards at him and Hyunjun’s antics, and he feels relief flood him when they reply,

“Yn, my name is yn.” 

You glance back when you hear the sound of growing footsteps behind you, and you know that the soldiers are heading in your general vicinity to search. Looking back at the handsome man before you, you give him a wave, “I have to hurry home, but it was nice meeting you.”

You quickly step past him, but pause when a warm hand gently wraps around your wrist. Biting the inside of your cheek, you glance back at him, just to see a hopeful look in his eyes as he stares at you. 

“Not going to ask for my name?” He asks with a small smile, and you try to fight the warmth that’s threatening to flood your face as your eyes bore into his. Tilting your head, you grin at him, “Alright, what’s your name?” 

His smile widens at the sight of your own, and he gently slides his hand down from your wrist to encompass your hand. You blink in surprise, internally thinking of how bold he is, while Hyunjae’s just trying to ignore how hard his heart is beating against his chest as he gives your hand a squeeze. 

“Jaehyun, my name is Lee Jaehyun.”

He lets go of your hand after telling you his name, and your arm falls limply to your side. Nodding your head, you raise your hand up and wave at him again, quietly hoping to see him again as you say, 

“I’ll see you around, Lee Jaehyun.” 

He watches as you turn around and walk down the street until you’re out of sight. As soon as you’re gone, he collapses onto Hyunjun, and his friend laughs loudly at his behavior while repeatedly slapping his shoulder.

“You menace! You can’t just collapse onto me after you elbowed me in the stomach while talking to them!” 

Hyunjae grips onto Hyunjun’s arm with a chuckle, “Hope I taught you how to properly flirt with the baker’s daughter for next week.”

“Shut up!”

Hyunjae dusts off the books that were returned, standing behind the counter of the library in case someone walks in. He places the book onto the cart of clean books, before reaching for the next book to clean. As he’s about to grab the rag, the sound of the door chime captures his attention. 

“Hello, welcome to Utopia Library…” He trails off when he looks up to find you standing at the entrance, a shy smile on your face as you quietly shut the door behind you. Once the door’s closed, you tentatively raise your hand up and wave at him, “Hi.” 

Hyunjae blinks, before raising his hand up and waving back at you, “Hi, yn.” 

You glance around the library as you step further inside, having walked by the building so many times but never entering it. Hyunjae watches you with stars in his eyes, and he feels his heart stop when you turn your head to look at him. 

“You work here?” You ask as you walk up to the counter, and he nods his head with a small grin while he gently cleans the book in his hand. “Yeah, I guess you could say that.”

You raise an eyebrow at the answer, “What does that mean?” 

Hyunjae just shrugs his shoulders and places the book onto the cart. You watch as he pushes the cart out from behind the counter, and heads towards the bookshelves to start putting the books back in their spot. You squint at him, “Jaehyun, what did you mean by that?” 

And Hyunjae grins, turning to you with a teasing look in his eyes that makes you even more curious about what he’s hinting at. He gestures over towards the front counter again, and that’s when you notice a framed family painting on the wall behind it. 

You blink, before turning back towards the handsome man in front of you. You stare at him for a moment longer, and he lets out a laugh when your mouth suddenly drops open and you point at him. 

“You own this library?!” You exclaim, and he shrugs his shoulders as he places a book back on the shelf. “Kind of, it’s more of my parents’ than me. I just work here on days when they’re too busy.” 

You slowly nod your head in understanding, before glancing around the library with genuine curiosity in your gaze. He looks away from the bookshelf for a moment to check on you, and he lets out a grin when he sees you peeking your head into the different aisles. 

“You can go look around if you want, just holler if you need me.” Hyunjae says, and you turn to him with a furrow to your brows. “But this is a library.” 

Hyunjae tilts his head, “It is.” 

“So I’m not allowed to yell in here because it’s a library.” You deadpan, and the pretty man blinks at you. He slowly raises a hand up to his forehead and turns around for a quick second to mutter, 

“My god, they’re so cute.” 

He turns back to you and gestures around your surroundings, “We’re the only ones here, so there’s no worries of you disturbing anyone who’s reading.” 

Your mouth forms an ‘o’ shape, and he chuckles at your reaction. You quickly shake your head as if to snap out of your trance, and give him a thumbs up as you point over to the other aisles. 

“I’m going to explore.”

“Have fun~” Hyunjae tells you, and you smile at him with a nod of your head. He watches as you skip off to the next aisle, and he grins. Turning back towards the cart full of books he needs to put away, he lets out a soft laugh. 

“Why am I so endeared already?” He asks himself quietly, before beginning to put the books back on their shelves.

Hyunjae jumps slightly when the sound of a book slamming against the counter rings out from behind him, and he turns around to find you staring at him with a furrow to your brows. He blinks at you, having expected you to be asleep at one of the tables like you usually are. 

“Yes?” He asks, and you respond by lifting up the book you had previously slammed onto the counter. Once he lays eyes on the cover, he lets out a quiet laugh and shakes his head. “Did you like Pride and Prejudice, yn?” 

“I cried.” You state, and he bites back a snort as he places the pen down onto the table. He turns around so that he’s now facing you, and leans onto the counter so that you can explain what you thought of the story. “Well, go on.”

“I didn’t think I’d like it as much as I did, but it was actually quite beautiful.” You begin, and he watches as your eyes begin to sparkle as you retell all of your favorite scenes in the story. There’s a point in your ramble where you lift your hands up to express how frustrated you were at some parts, and Hyunjae giggles.

The two of you have known each other for three months now, with you going to visit the library everyday so that you can see Hyunjae. When you first started coming, you would look around the library and bombard him with questions about the books and his daily life. When you started to become more comfortable, Hyunjae began to notice how tired your eyes have always looked whenever the two of you talk. 

What started with you always talking to him throughout your visit, became Hyunjae leading you towards the tables where you can go and take a nap, until eventually you would just make your way there naturally. He had even brought you a small pillow from his apartment that you can use to lay on for your naps. 

He gave you Pride & Prejudice last week, and he wondered whether or not you would actually read it. Unbeknownst to him, you started reading it on the first night he had given it to you.

“There was a scene where Mr. Darcy had flexed his hand after helping Elizabeth into a wagon because he was so overwhelmed with his love for her, and I—never mind. I’m rambling too much, sorry.” You say, looking away shyly after you stopped yourself from continuing. Hyunjae tilts his head, reaching out with a pen to gently poke your forehead, making you frown and swat it away. 

“What was that for?”

“Don’t feel like you have to apologize for being excited. I love listening to you talk, whether it be about the smallest things.” Hyunjae tells you, and your breath hitches at the genuinity dripping from his voice. Blinking, you raise a hand up and scratch the back of your neck as warmth floods your face, “O-Oh.” 

Hyunjae grins, “You can tell me. I’ll always listen.” 

Biting your bottom lip, you suck in a deep breath before looking back at him again. Placing your hands onto the counter, you fiddle with your fingers as you continue. 

“I just… I thought it would be nice to have someone love me like that. For someone to react like they had just held a star after they simply grazed against my hand, like I’m the most precious thing in the world to them.” 

The silence of the library falls over the two of you after you finish explaining your thoughts, and you bite the inside of your cheek as you wait for Hyunjae to speak. Your eyes burn holes into your hands as you wait, not wanting to look up at the pretty man for the fear of what his expression may look like. 

After a moment, you slowly glance up at him, only for your heart to stop when you find his eyes boring into yours. You let out a nervous laugh, continuing to fiddle with your hands out of anxiety from what he could possibly say. 

“What if someone already did love you like that?” Hyunjae finally asks, his voice shaky as he awaits your answer. You blink, wondering what he could mean as the two of you stare at each other. 

“I don’t have anyone in my life who could.” You answer slowly, searching his eyes for any emotion that could tell you what he’s possibly thinking. However, he turns away before you could look any further. He lets out a breath, placing a book into the cart and pushing it out from behind the counter. 

“Maybe you should rethink that.” He tells you with a small smile, before heading over towards the bookshelves. Leaving you standing by the front counter, a furrow to your brows as you watch him walk off in confusion. Pursing your lips, you briefly glance down just to find the book on the table, and your eyes widen slightly.

“Jaehyun!” You shout, picking up the book and looking in the direction he walked off in. You blink in surprise when you don’t see him, “Jaehyun?” 

“In the back aisle!” His voice rings out, and you let out a breath of relief, before heading in the direction you had heard him call out from. You glance down each aisle until you finally see him putting away the books, and you walk up to him and tap his shoulder. 

“Mm?” He replies, not turning to look at you since his attention is solely focused on making sure he’s putting the books in their designated spots. 

Pursing your lips, you hold out the book from behind him, making sure it’s now in his line of sight. You watch as he halts his movement and stares at the cover before saying, “You forgot to bring this book to put it away.” 

Hyunjae lets your words digest, before the corner of his lips tilts upwards. He gently moves your arm away from his face, and reaches down to grab another book to place it back on the shelf. 

“It’s yours. I gave that for you to keep.” Hyunjae says as he pushes the book into its spot. You just stare at the back of his head, letting it sink in, before your eyes widen. Without thinking, you reach out and grab his wrist, making him turn around to face you so that you can look him in the eyes.

“Yn—”

“Don’t you need this book? Doesn’t it have a special place on one of these shelves?” You ask with wide eyes, and Hyunjae can only stare at you as warmth floods his face. When he doesn’t respond, you gently shake his arm, making him snap out of his trance and blink at you. 

He quickly takes his wrist out of your grasp and places it behind his back, quietly wondering to himself if you can hear how loudly his heart is beating within his chest. Letting out a shaky laugh, he shakes his head, “We have at least three copies of Pride & Prejudice aside from that one, so that’s why I’m giving it to you as a gift.” 

You can only stare at him in disbelief, knowing just how precious and rare it is for someone like you to own a book like this. Swallowing the growing lump in your throat, you muster up a small smile as warmth crawls up your neck, “Thank you, Jaehyun.” 

And he smiles and nods at you, “Anything for you, yn.” 

With that, you watch as he turns and pushes the cart to the next aisle. Your eyes follow after him, and you watch through the shelves as he picks up the first book on the cart and places it in its spot next to the others. 

What you fail to catch is Hyunjae gently rubbing the part of his wrist that you had held, his heart still managing to thump loudly against his chest as he fights back the smile that threatens to take over his features.

Hyunjae yanks you into his apartment and quickly shuts the door, turning the lock on it as you head towards the windows and pull the curtains. The two of you move fast, making sure no one will be able to peek inside as you rush into the bathroom to change out of your outfit. 

Hyunjae lets out a breath once he’s sure every window is covered, and he falls back onto the chair as a new wave of exhaustion falls over him. The sound of the door opening catches his attention, and he glances over to see you step out of the bathroom, no longer clad in the dark attire you were wearing previously. He watches as you place your folded clothes on the kitchen table, and he stares at the black silk that you so delicately put on top. 

He stares at you in silence as you avoid eye contact, gently tapping your finger on top of the chair as you feel his gaze burn holes into the side of your face. Biting the inside of your cheek, you finally glance over at Hyunjae, and you let out an awkward laugh to try and ease the tension.

“So… you run fast, huh?” You ask, and Hyunjae just raises an eyebrow at you. He gestures towards your folded clothes on the table, before resting his hand on his knee, “And you’re Midnight, huh?”

“Damn it.” You mutter under your breath, unable to change the subject from acknowledging the elephant in the room. He rests his chin on his hand, “You know that you’re the most wanted criminal, right?” 

You let out a quiet chuckle, nodding your head as you glance at the pretty man with a smirk, “Of course.” 

Hyunjae just stares at you quietly for a moment, wondering how he didn’t piece everything together soon. From the moment the two of you first met, you were hiding from the soldiers but had run into him. During the day, you fall asleep the moment your cheek rests on your arm at the library, and you hardly come to visit him at night as you always claim that you’re busy. 

“Are you going to turn me in now that you know?” You ask, breaking the latter away from his thoughts. He notices the hint of fear in your eyes as you await his response, making him wonder what’s going on in your head as you look at him. 

The corner of his lips quirks upward, and he glances down at the floor as he lets out a sigh. Your heart leaps into your throat, trying to decipher what his smile means as you try to come to terms with the fact that you’re going to be executed if the pretty librarian you’ve gotten to know over the months turns you in.

“Why would I do that?” Hyunjae asks, making you pause. Your eyes widen and he has to bite back a laugh as you repeatedly point towards your Midnight outfit before pointing back at yourself. Biting the inside of your cheek, you walk up to him and rest your hands on the arm rests of his chair. 

“Why wouldn’t you do that? I’m a dangerous bandit who steals from the rich, willing to do whatever it takes to get my prize. There’s a bounty over my head that would not only pay off any debt you have, but have you set for the rest of your life. Anyone else would take the chance, so why not you?” You ask, eyes wide as they search his own. Hyunjae looks back into your eyes, seeing the fear and panic clear as day as your heart beats loudly against your chest.

He chuckles quietly, and your eyebrows furrow in confusion. Letting out a breath, he tilts his head and leans in closer to your face, making your breath hitch from the sudden realization of the close proximity between the two of you.

“You’re a bandit who steals from the rich to donate to the less fortunate. You like to bother the son of the town’s librarian by taking a nap at one of the reading tables. You don’t like to read, but you listen to the librarian go on a tangent about the recent book he read. You always tease the librarian for his job, but you complain whenever he works late hours because you’re worried for him.” Hyunjae says, making you blink in shock. He gives you a small smile, reaching up and gently patting your head like you’re a precious flower, when in reality, you’re the most wanted criminal in the country.

“Why would I turn in someone who’s doing all this for the greater good?” Hyunjae asks, before leaning back into his chair. You finally suck in a deep breath once he’s no longer inches away from your face, and you take a step back and grab the arm of the couch. 

Biting your bottom lip, you tentatively ask, “So… you’re not going to turn me in?” 

“No.”

“And you’re just going to act the same as usual?” 

“Pretty much.” 

“So everything will just be normal between us? Aside from the fact that you know my secret?” 

Hyunjae nods his head with a quiet chuckle, “Yes, yn. Everything between us is going to be normal.” 

You let out a breath of relief, finally allowing yourself to sit down on the couch as the memory of what happened within the past hour all flows past your eyes. Hyunjae watches as you cover your mouth with your hand when a yawn escapes you, and he grins to himself. 

“You can sleep in my room.” Hyunjae tells you, and your eyes widen at the offer. 

“No! It’s okay! I can probably head back to my own apartment now, I bet there’s no soldiers—” The sound of boots stomping against the pavement outside captures your guys’ attention, and you slowly melt back into the couch when you realize there’s no getting out of this situation. 

Hyunjae chuckles and gestures towards the couch that you’re seated on, “I’ll sleep here tonight, you take the bed.” 

You immediately stand up and shake your head, “No! This is your apartment so you should sleep in your own bed. I’m the guest—”

“Which is why you should sleep on the bed. It would be rude of me to let the guest sleep on the couch.” Hyunjae interrupts, and you squint your eyes at him. After five months of knowing each other, you’ve come to learn that the librarian is incredibly stubborn, even more stubborn than you are. 

And that’s a feat in itself.

So, you regrettably trudge over in the direction his room is. Hyunjae bites back a laugh at how slumped over your shoulders are at the loss in the argument, and he walks over to the closet to grab a blanket for the couch. 

“Jaehyun?” 

The black haired beauty turns his head when he hears you softly call his name, and he feels his heart stutter within his chest when he sees the shy look on your face as you stare at him by his bedroom door. 

“Yeah, yn?” 

You give him a small smile, “Thank you.” 

Warmth flushes up his face as he looks at you, and he quietly wonders if he’ll always react this way whenever he sees you smile. Biting the inside of his cheek, he nods his head at you, “Sleep well, yn.” 

And with that, you turn around and enter his room. When the door shuts behind you, Hyunjae continues to stare for a moment longer, before letting out a sigh and closing the door to the closet. He walks over to the couch and lays down, unfolding the blanket and laying it on top of him as he stares up at the ceiling. Only one thought comes to mind as the exhaustion slowly begins to hit him, and he can only let out a quiet laugh.

You really have no idea how much he loves you.

The sound of the familiar knock pattern on the door makes Hyunjae hurry over from the kitchen and immediately open the door, allowing you to stumble in as he quickly closes it and makes sure it’s locked. Almost like it’s an instinct, he rushes around his apartment and makes sure to close every curtain so that no soldiers can peek inside and see you.

Once he shuts the last curtain, the sound of quiet groans makes him turn his head in your direction. His eyes widen when he sees you tightly clutching onto your thigh, blood dripping onto the floor as you cry out in pain.

“Yn!” 

You bite your bottom lip when Hyunjae immediately kneels down beside you, first aid kit by his side as he carefully cuts off the fabric that’s covering your leg. 

“I got shot when I was running.” You mutter, letting out a quiet cry when he starts to wipe away the blood surrounding the wound. He carefully looks at your leg and feels a bit of relief when he sees that the bullet went straight through. 

“It’ll be okay, the bullet didn’t get lodged in your leg. I might have to give you stitches, but it should be easy.” Hyunjae explains, making you raise an eyebrow even through your pained state. He reaches out towards the first aid kit and pulls out a needle and thread.

“For a librarian, you know far too much on how to care for someone who got shot.” You state, and he just shrugs his shoulders at you while cleaning the gunshot wound. “Read a lot of books about war and medicine.” 

“Thought you liked books like Pride & Prejudice.” You say, and he rolls his eyes at you. He holds up the needle and hands you a pillow that he grabbed from the couch. You tentatively take it from him, and he gives you a sad smile. 

“This is going to hurt really bad, so if you want to scream, do it into that pillow.” Hyunjae tells you, and you bite your bottom lip at how serious he is. Nodding your head, you raise the pillow up to your face so that you won’t have to look at what’s about to happen. 

“Just tell me when you need a break.” 

The next hour is filled with you screaming into the pillow while Hyunjae mutters numerous apologies the whole time he stitches up your thigh.

“I wish I never got shot.” You state after Hyunjae’s finished stitching up your leg. The two of you are laying on the floor of his apartment, staring up at the ceiling as an ice pack rests on your thigh. He glances over at you, “Who’d you steal from this time?” 

After Hyunjae found out your identity, he made you promise to come hide out in his apartment whenever you find yourself in that type of situation again. Little did he know how often this would occur. It happens so much to the point that the two of you ended up creating a knock code so that he would know it’s you in front of his apartment.

You chuckle, “The big tuna company. I heard that they have a large safe in their office, and it ended up being true. I left about half of the money I found there..” 

“Do you have it with you?” Hyunjae asks, suddenly realizing that you came here in a hurry after getting shot. You nod your head and gesture over to the bag of money laying by the door, and the librarian blinks at the sight of it. “I’ll drop it off in the morning.” 

Hyunjae turns his head back so that he’s staring up at the ceiling, feeling the worries pile over his shoulders after the events of tonight collapse onto him. Biting the inside of his cheek, he glances at you, seeing you blinking tiredly up at the ceiling.

Clenching his fist at his side, he musters up all the courage he has to blurt out, “Why don’t you stop being Midnight now?” 

You pause at the question, quietly wondering what led him to asking such a ridiculous question. Pursing your lips, you turn your head to see him looking away from you. You sigh and look back at the ceiling, “Why should I stop?” 

“Because it’s dangerous.” 

“The families in the villages not being able to afford anything to eat is much more dangerous than me stealing a few measly coins from those who are rich.” You drawl, and Hyunjae sits up to look down at your unbothered expression. 

“Yn, you’re the most wanted criminal in the country. Everytime you steal, the soldiers are closer to capturing you, and one day I won’t hear your knock on my door.” Hyunjae says, concern laced in his voice as he stares at you. 

You shut your eyes and let out a breath, “Jaehyun—”

“Yn, you’re not listening to me. When they get their hands on you, they’ll kill you—”

“I’m not afraid of dying if that means these people can eat, Jaehyun!” You exclaim, now sitting up and looking back at the librarian before you. You falter slightly when you see how watery his eyes are as he stares at you, and you suck in a shaky breath when you realize how worried he is. 

Glancing down at your lap, you continue, “I can’t just keep living normally while knowing how unfair the system is. The rich get richer, and the poor get poorer. Why should I live comfortably while there’s people who can’t even buy a grain of rice to eat?” 

Hyunjae can only stare at you as tears flood your eyes the more you explain. He knows that you’re right, that it’s not fair. He’s seen the children who beg on the streets, and he’s always given them extra food and change he may have, but that’s it. He’s always admired Midnight, having never heard of a bandit who only steals from the rich and doesn’t even keep the wealth. 

But he can’t imagine losing you. 

“I don’t want you to die, yn.” Hyunjae mutters, now feeling more lost than he did before. You let out a quiet laugh at his words, and he slowly looks up at you, watching as a tear falls past your eye and trails down your cheek. Giving him a small smile, you reach out and take hold of his hand, encasing it in your warm hands as you stare into his eyes. 

“I’m not afraid of death, but I promise that I won’t die.” You say, feeling the weight of your promise in your chest. Hyunjae doesn’t respond, instead lifting up his hand and tenderly wiping away the tear that’s escaped your eye. 

The corner of his lips quirks upwards when you lean into his touch, and he whispers, 

“That’s a promise you can never break, yn.”

Hyunjae walks to the library, the setting sun painting the sky in different shades of orange and pink. You had left early in the morning to give the village the money you had taken, telling him you’ll be back in the evening. 

“I won’t be back until tonight. Will you be here?” You ask as you throw your bag over your shoulder, stumbling back a bit due to your injured leg. Hyunjae’s eyebrows furrow a bit in concern, knowing that you shouldn’t even be walking yet because of your stitches.

“Are you sure you need to do this today? Your stitches—”

“I’ll be fine, I swear.” You cut off, and he just presses his lips together into a thin line. Giving him a small smile, you reach out and nudge his shoulder, “I’ll come visit you tonight so that you know I’m okay, just tell me whether you’ll be here or at the library.” 

Hyunjae just sighs, and points in the direction of the library, “I’m closing tonight.” 

“Then I’ll meet you there.” You say, and he musters a smile even through the deep pit in his stomach. 

“I’ll see you tonight, yn.”

He reaches for the keys in his pocket when he turns the corner, only to pause when he sees a couple of soldiers waiting by the entrance of the library. His breath hitches and he immediately hides behind the wall, sneaking a glance over to see what they’re doing.

“Are you sure the Lee family is involved? They just own the library here.” 

“There was a trail of blood that led to Lee Jaehyun’s apartment last night, and Commander Park managed to shoot Midnight in the leg before they got away.” 

A hand suddenly clamps onto his shoulder in the middle of him listening in, and he turns his head to find a soldier standing behind him, staring at him with a small smirk to his lips. 

“Come with me, Lee Jaehyun.”

Hyunjae sits on the floor of the library, surrounded by three soldiers who have been ordered to watch him after the two hour long interrogation. There’s dried blood on the corner of his lips, and his stomach is bruised from the multiple times the soldiers began to beat him for not answering their questions.

He rests his head back against the bookshelves and looks out the window, seeing that the moon has already risen into the sky. He quietly prays to himself that you won’t come, that you were held back by the villagers to stay for one night. 

“Let them live a long life.” Hyunjae whispers under his breath. His eyes slowly begin to shut as the exhaustion begins to take over, but he’s suddenly whacked in the head with so much force, all he can focus on is the pain in his head as he lays on the floor.

“Don’t fall asleep, Lee. You don’t deserve that luxury when you aided the country’s most wanted criminal.” The soldier hisses, and Hyunjae just sucks in a shaky breath as he blinks his eyes.

“You…” He begins to croak out, catching the soldiers by surprise. He slowly turns to look at them, and he feels warmth begin to dribble down his head as he shoots them a glare. “You’re slaves to the government. Living a life so blindly that you’re willing to close your eyes and arrest whoever they tell you to without a second thought.” 

“Midnight is a thief.”

“Midnight is a thief that gives back to the poor.” Hyunjae snaps, trying to blink away the blurriness to his eyesight so he can continue to glare at them. The soldier who whacked him earlier clenches the gun in his hand, before taking a step forward, “You’ve made a big mistake opening that mouth of yours—”

Hyunjae flinches back when they raise the butt of the gun in the air, knowing he’s about to black out on impact. 

But it never comes.

He slowly opens his eyes and looks up, just to see a figure dressed in black holding the soldier’s wrist in mid-air, having stopped him from punching Hyunjae in the face. The soldiers’ eyes widen, “Midnight.”

You smile behind the silk mask, “Yes, that’s me.” 

Hyunjae watches as you suddenly deliver a hard kick to the soldier’s stomach, sending them flying backwards into the bookshelf. You unarm the two other soldiers with ease, removing all the bullets from their guns and promptly fighting them like it’s the easiest thing in the world.

How are they able to beat three soldiers up when they just got shot in the leg last night? He wonders to himself.

Hyunjae rolls onto his back and stares up at the ceiling, blinking tiredly as he listens to the shouts of pain occurring around him. Nausea and exhaustion flood him, and he feels more confused due to the hard blow that was dealt to his head. 

“Jaehyun!” 

He blinks at the voice, and squints when a figure appears over his face. He stares at them, unsure of who they are as the light shines behind their face. 

“Lee Jaehyun! Get up!” Hyunjae’s eyes widen when your pretty eyes become visible, watching as you shout at him.  He blinks at you, “Yn.” 

Your eyes are watery as you look at his dazed expression and the blood dripping down from his head, and you bite your bottom lip at the fact that this is your fault.

“Jaehyun, you have to work with me here. I have to lift you up and get you out of here before they wake up, okay?” You explain, and he slowly nods his head. You reach behind and support his neck with your hand, carefully lifting him up from the floor and bringing him towards the exit of the library. 

“You shouldn’t have come…” Hyunjae mutters as the two of you leave the library. You shake your head, bringing him into the alley to hide from the light posts as you think of different places you both could run to.

“You dummy, why wouldn’t I have come?” You ask, tears falling past your eyes as the two of you walk. Hyunjae just lets out a tired chuckle, and you give him a look of disbelief, “How are you laughing in a situation like this?!” 

“I had it under control.” Hyunjae breathes out as the two of you walk towards the tunnel, and you can’t help but snort at his words. He grins at your reaction while trying his best to not lay all of his weight on you, and you shake your head. 

“Jaehyun, I’m so sorry.” You tell him, and he waves his hand at you. “There’s nothing to apologize for.” 

“This is all my fault. I shouldn’t have ever told you I was Midnight—”

“Yn, let’s talk about this when I’m not bloody and being half dragged by you because I’m pretty sure I have a concussion.” Hyunjae mutters, and you bite your bottom lip, but relent and nod your head. The two of you enter the tunnel, and he grimaces in pain when his head pounds. He glances down towards the ground, only to squint when he sees the blood coming through your black pants. 

“Yn, your stitches—”

“It’s fine. You’re more injured than I am.” You say through your gritted teeth, ignoring the pain in your leg as you adjust your grip around Hyunjae. “But yn—”

“Well, well, well. Who knew Midnight’s lover was the town’s librarian?” Your blood runs cold at the all too familiar voice heard from behind you, and Hyunjae glances at you with fear in his eyes. Biting your bottom lip, you mutter, “Jaehyun, start slowly inching towards the exit of the tunnel. I got this.” 

His eyes widen with panic, “Yn—”

You quickly shush him, before letting go of him and turning around to face the soldier, seeing the gun held up towards you and Hyunjae. You step in front of the pretty librarian, before letting out a smile, “Commander Park! So lovely to see you again.” 

His lips quirk upwards into a smirk, “How’s your leg holding up?” 

You shrug your shoulders, ignoring the throbbing pain in your thigh as you try to appear nonchalant. “Just fine. Not like it was the first time I got shot.” 

Silence falls over the tunnel, and you feel your heart race as you try to think of a way to get Hyunjae out of this. There’s only three of you, and it would be two against one. Except for the fact that Hyunjae most likely has a concussion and can barely walk, while you have ripped open stitches from the bullet hole in your thigh. 

“You ready to die, Midnight?” Commander Park asks you, and you give him a grin. 

“I don’t know. Are you ready to get beat by the bandit you haven’t been able to capture for the last two years?”

You watch as the soldier’s eyes turn into slits at your words, and he puts his gun back into its holster on his hip. He tilts his head at you, before suddenly rushing forward with newfound rage. 

Hyunjae can only watch in horror as the two of you begin to fight, with the soldier pulling out every punch and kick, and you dodging each and every one of them with ease. You pull your hand back and uppercut Commander Park, grinning when he lets out a howl of pain as he clutches his nose. Your satisfaction is short-lived, however, when the soldier takes the opportunity to kick you in the stomach, sending you flying backwards and landing on your back. 

The wind is knocked out of your lungs on impact, and you desperately try to suck in a breath as you stare up at the dark tunnel. You’re finally able to breathe in when an excruciating pain takes over the slight relief you felt, and you let out an ear piercing scream. Glancing down, you see Commander Park slamming the heel of his boot into your gunshot wound, and you grit your teeth to try and hold back your cries of pain.

“You’re going to jail, where you’ll be tried and hung for your crimes.” He tells you with a shit-eating grin, and you let out a scream when he digs his heel in deeper. He bends down and rips the silk mask from your face, revealing your true identity. He lets out a scoff at the sight, throwing the mask to the ground as he eventually gets off of you, stomping on your mask as he walks away. Tears fall past your eyes as you try to hold your leg, and you shut your eyes tightly at how much it hurts.

“Jaehyun will accompany you. And since he aided in your hiding, he will be tried and hanged as well.” Commander Park explains after sparing a glance at Hyunjae, and he squints when he notices the librarian has drawn closer to the two of you. Your eyes snap open at his words, and with as much strength as you can muster, you sit up and crawl closer to the soldier. Biting your bottom lip, you fight the pain as you stand up from the ground, and look into Commander Park’s eyes.

“P-Please. Not him, I forced him. I threatened him to hide me in his apartment, it was all me.” You beg, and he raises an eyebrow at the sudden shift in your demeanor. You look up to see him staring at you with curiosity and satisfaction in his gaze, and you gulp as you clutch your thigh in pain.

“Please. You can take me, but not him. He has nothing to do with this.” You beg the soldier, falling to your knees without a second thought as you plead. Commander Park stares down at you, and you watch as the corner of his lips quirks upwards in amusement. 

“Oh, Midnight.” He says in a sweet tone, and your eyebrows furrow in confusion, only for your blood to run cold when you see his hand wrap around the gun in his pocket. 

“How bold of you to think that I would have mercy on a thief.” 

Time seems to come to a slow when Commander Park takes the gun out of his pocket, and aims behind your head. You can’t seem to move any faster to grab the gun from him, let alone stand up so that it’s pointed at you instead. 

The sound of the gunshot rings in your ears when you’re finally able to take the gun from his grasp and point it towards the soldier, shooting him without a second thought as the ringing in your ears grows louder. 

You breathe heavily as you stay in that position, gun still pointed towards the dying Commander as you stare at him with wide eyes. Your heart hammers against your chest as the weight of your actions slowly begins to settle.

“Yn…” You suck in a breath and turn around, only for your heart to drop when you see Hyunjae laying on the ground, hand over his stomach as the blood begins to pour out. The gun falls from your hands and onto the pavement, and you quickly crawl over to Hyunjae, ignoring the excruciating pain in your leg as you grasp at his arms.

“L-Let me see.” You stutter, and he shakes his head at you. Your hands begin to shake when you see the blood trickling through his shirt, “Jaehyun, let me see.” 

He blinks tiredly at you, before removing his hands from his stomach. You let out a quiet gasp when you unbutton his shirt, seeing so much blood that you can’t even tell whether or not the bullet went through cleanly.

“I-I’ll lift you up and take you to the hospital, all you have to do is keep pressing on it, okay? I can carry you.” You explain as you grab his hands and press them into the bullet wound. Hyunjae just stares at you as you panic, watching as more tears form in your eyes as you tell him your plan.

“A-And when you start to get better, we’ll leave. We can escape to a new town so that no one will know who we are. I-I’ll stop being Midnight and we can find work to help pay for our food and housing, I promise.” You sob, and Hyunjae can only look at you with tears flooding his eyes. Biting your bottom lip, you reach out so that your hands are under his arms, “I’ll help you up now, okay? You can lay all your weight on me, it’s fine.” 

“Yn.” 

“No, really. I’m strong, and you know it too. This will be a piece of cake!”

“Yn.”

“Jaehyun, didn’t you see me beat all of those soldiers? I can carry you—”

“Yn!” Hyunjae shouts, promptly putting a stop to the hope you were clinging onto so desperately. Your bottom lip quivers as you look at the beautiful man before you, and you shake your head at him. “Jaehyun, it was all my fault. This is all my fault. I should’ve never gone to your apartment—no. I should’ve never bumped into you in the middle of the street—” 

“You’re the most beautiful thing I’ve ever witnessed in this lifetime.” Hyunjae murmurs tiredly, the smallest smile on his face as he looks at you. Your heart stutters in your chest at his words, and you feel panic seize your heart when you realize how pale he’s become. Shaking your head, you frantically try to wrap your arms around him to help him get up, only to let out a cry when your injured leg buckles and you fall to the ground. 

“Lee Jaehyun, get up!” You scream, but he just continues to stare at you with nothing but love in his eyes. You let out a sob as you try to help him get up again, just to fall to your knees a second time. He shakes his head, and reaches out and tiredly cups your face with his hand. 

He gives you a smile, “I have something I’ve been meaning to tell you, yn.” 

You bite the inside of your cheek, wondering how he can still manage to smile at you like this. Blinking away the tears that are blurring your vision, you say, “What is it?” 

Hyunjae strokes your cheek with his thumb, and he feels warmth flood his heart when you lean into his touch. He watches as a tear falls past your eye, and he quietly confesses, 

“I love you.” 

And you let out a cry, one that’s filled with so much regret as you look down at his bloodied stomach. You reach up with a shaky hand and rest it over his, glancing back up into his eyes as you tell him, 

“I love you too, Lee Jaehyun.” 

The smile that takes over Hyunjae’s features is so heartbreakingly beautiful after the three words leave your mouth. He quietly wonders what would have happened if he had been honest about his feelings from the start, would the two of you just be talking about sweet nothings in the library like usual? Would you be safe? Happy?

He strokes your cheek one last time as all the memories he’s made over his lifetime begin to flash past his eyes, but he tries to focus on you kneeling right before him. You’re crying. You’re crying so hard that you’re gasping for breath as you speak to him, but he can’t seem to hear a word that you’re saying no matter how hard he tries to listen.

The memories slowly begin to morph into all the memories he made with you, and he smiles to himself at the visual of your laugh, your sleeping face on the table at the library, and your beautiful smile. He lets out a breath when one memory flashes past his eyes,

“I’m not afraid of death, but I promise that I won’t die.” You say, feeling the weight of your promise in your chest. Hyunjae doesn’t respond, instead lifting up his hand and tenderly wiping away the tear that’s escaped your eye. 

The corner of his lips quirks upwards when you lean into his touch, and he whispers, 

“That’s a promise you can never break, yn.”

Hyunjae smiles at the memory, and with his last breath, he mutters, “You didn’t break your promise.” 

Hyunjae gasps awake, sweat dripping from his body as tears fall past his eyes at a frantic rate. He looks at his surroundings, seeing the posters and photos adorning the walls of his apartment’s room, no longer the dark and cold tunnel he was just in. He slowly sits up from the bed and glances at the time, seeing that it’s 11:35 in the morning. 

He fell asleep at midnight yesterday. 

This is the first full night of sleep he’s gotten in months. 

He raises his hands up and grasps at his hair, tears continuing to fall as the sobs begin to wrack his body. His shoulders shake with each sob he lets out, eventually raising his hands up to cover his face as a means to muffle the sound of his cries. 

He just saw his whole past life flash before his eyes, and he wonders how this could’ve possibly happened. He was never one to believe in things like reincarnation, let alone fate. 

But how come he met you again?

He sucks in a breath, looking out the window as the sunlight peeks in through the blinds. The sound of his quiet sobs fill the room, and he blinks when he hears the sound of his phone go off. 

Turning his head, he reaches out and picks up his phone from the table. Unlocking his phone, his heart jumps in his chest when he sees the preview of the text, and he quickly taps on the message.

yn: hyunjae, it’s yn. i got your number from kevin

i hope you’re doing okay. i’m sorry if i did anything wrong.

i hope that you’re getting plenty of rest in your comfy bed! it’s a lot better than the hard study table at the library.

i…

nevermind hehe

just… sleep well, okay?

i’ll be at the library from 2-10 today if you do plan to stop by ^^

Slamming his phone down on the bed, he practically jumps off of it and sprints to the bathroom to start getting ready. 

Fate, soulmates, whatever it may be—Hyunjae’s only sure of one thing. 

He’s not going to lose you again.

You push the cart through the aisles with a heavy heart, having felt awful since Hyunjae left the library two days ago. You’re still unsure as to what made him react like he saw a ghost when he saw you, let alone what made him run away from you.

You just hope he’s doing okay.

Letting out a sigh, you push the cart towards the study tables, and you feel a twinge of pain when you don’t see him at a table. Biting your bottom lip, you shake your head and move to the next aisle, taking out a book from the cart and placing it onto the shelf.

It’s when you’re about to grab another book that a hand suddenly wraps around your wrist, and your eyes widen in shock when you’re spun around. You open your mouth to protest when you’re pulled into the stranger’s embrace, but stop when he breathes out your name. 

You lean back, just to find Hyunjae staring at you with pure relief in his eyes as he holds you in his arms. Heat rises up your neck as you look at him, and without another word, you take a step forward and reciprocate his embrace. He holds you tightly within his arms, his breathing turning a bit shaky the longer he holds you. 

“Hyunjae, I won’t ask you what happened, but are you okay?” You ask, voice muffled by his shoulder. He simply nods his head, refusing to let you go for the fear that you’ll disappear. 

“Yn.” 

You turn your head slightly, “Yeah?” 

Hyunjae sucks in a breath, and without a second thought he says, “I love you.” 

You freeze in his embrace. Warmth floods your face as his words sink in, and you gently peel yourself away from him so that you can look into his eyes. Your arms remain wrapped around his waist as you search his eyes, trying to see if this is just a prank he’s pulling. 

You blink, “What?” 

Hyunjae just gives you a small smile, “I love you, yn.” 

He watches as the corners of your lips slowly begins to quirk upwards into a shy smile, and you glance down at your feet to try and hide the dumb look on your face. Hyunjae can only stare at you with a hopeful expression on his face, and you bite the inside of your cheek, before looking back up into his eyes.

You smile brightly, “I love you too, Hyunjae.” 

Tears flood the black haired beauty’s eyes at your confession, his heart beating loudly against his chest as he feels nothing but happiness and pure relief in this moment. Your eyebrows furrow in concern when a tear escapes past his left eye, and you reach out and cup his cheek with your hand, stroking away the tear with your thumb. 

“Why are you crying? Are you that happy to be dating the university’s librarian?” You coo with a teasing smile, and Hyunjae can only chuckle softly. He nods his head, leaning into your touch as he tells you honestly, “I’m just so happy to have met you.”

You feel warmth flood your chest at his sweet words, and you let out a breath. Looking away, you glance over to the study tables to see a vacant seat. Biting back a grin, you turn back towards Hyunjae and point over to it. 

“You wanna take a nap until my shift is over?” You ask, and he scoffs, eliciting a quiet laugh from you as he rolls his eyes. 

“What if I told you that I got someone to cover your shift for today?” Hyunjae asks, tightening his hold around you with a cheeky grin. You raise an eyebrow, “Why would you do that?” 

“So I can take my beautiful partner out on our first date.” He answers with ease, and he bites back a laugh at how big your eyes become at the newfound label. Blinking your eyes, you cough into your shoulder and promptly begin to look at everything but your boyfriend as you ask, “And who would be covering my shift?”

“I would!” 

You jump at the sudden intrusion, turning your head to find Kevin standing by the cart, a bright smile on his face as he looks between you and Hyunjae. You let out a quiet gasp when you realize that you and Hyunjae are still hugging, and you quickly let go of him and take a step back. His arms fall to his sides, and he laughs with the blonde at how shy you are.

“You called him here?” You ask as you point at your friend, and Hyunjae nods his head. 

You turn to Kevin, “And you would just gladly take my shift?” 

“Anything for the power of love, yn.” 

You blink at him, unable to find words when a warm hand gently wraps around yours. You glance back to see Hyunjae smiling at you, and he gestures towards the exit with his head. 

“Let’s go, yn.” 

Biting your bottom lip, a smile takes over your features as you nod your head. Without another word, Hyunjae sends a wave towards Kevin, before pulling you forward and running out of the library. 

You let out a laugh once the two of you break through the doors, and with newfound courage, you pull Hyunjae forward and run towards the parking lot. 

You feel him remove his hand from your grasp, and before you can look down, he’s quickly intertwined his fingers with yours. You squeal as he pulls you forward, and he glances back at you for a brief moment. 

Your eyes sparkle brightly as you look at him, and your skin is glowing underneath the warm Spring sun. You let out a laugh, one that’s so full of happiness and life that it brings an ache to his heart when he turns back. 

He smiles, “Yn!” 

“What!?” 

“You ready to ride the motorcycle again?” Hyunjae asks with a grin, and he glances back to see your features have dimmed slightly at the mention of the vehicle. He lets out a loud laugh, one that makes your eyes brighten again as he pulls you forward. 

“Where would we go?!” You ask, and his eyes get a distant look to them as he’s reminded of a brief memory. 

“No matter where you are, or where you go, I’ll be by your side to protect you.” 

Hyunjae can only giggle, feeling nothing but content as you both lay underneath the warm sun. He tilts his head up and looks at you, seeing you squinting at him for his reaction while patting his head. 

“What are you going on about?” Hyunjae teases, and you scoff. You retract your hand from his hair as a sign of protest, but he quickly reaches up and takes hold of it, causing you to halt your movements. 

“Even though I don’t know what could be so dangerous, why don’t we protect each other?” He suggests in a soft voice, making you glance down at the pretty librarian again. He watches as you blink at him, not knowing that you’re struggling to respond due to the fact that you’re so focused on his hand holding yours. 

“What?” You manage to choke out, and he grins at you. He lowers your hand back down to his head, before letting his arms fall back to his sides. “I’ll protect you, and you’ll protect me.” 

You roll your eyes, “How can a librarian protect me?” 

“You know, I’m stronger than you think I am.” Hyunjae tells you, and you smile softly as you look away. You gently begin to pat his head again, looking around at the long grass as you allow this rare moment of pure peace to become ingrained in your memory. 

“What if I was arrested,” You begin, and the pretty man looks up at you with a raised eyebrow. 

“Why would you be arrested? All you do is sleep at my library.” Hyunjae jokes, and you remove your hand from his hair to swiftly flick his forehead, eliciting a squeak of pain from the latter. Letting out a shaky breath, you continue, “As I was saying before I was so rudely interrupted, what if I was arrested? Would you bail me out?” 

Hyunjae nods his head almost immediately, “Of course.” 

You blink, “Really?”

He nods like it’s the easiest answer in the world, “For you? I would do anything, yn.” 

Hyunjae lets out a breath once the two of you make it to his motorcycle, the memory still fresh in his brain as he reaches out and picks up his helmet. 

“You still haven’t answered my question of where we’re going.” You pout, and the pretty boy just lets out a small smile as he gently places his helmet over your head. Buckling the straps together underneath your chin, he looks into your eyes as he says, “If you keep pouting so cutely like that I might have to kiss you.”

Your eyes widen at how bold he is, and you quickly lift a hand to cover your mouth while the other hand reaches out and slaps his shoulder. He lets out a laugh at your reaction, waving at you to signal that he’s just teasing as he throws a leg over the motorcycle. 

He turns to you once he’s settled and extends his hand, to which you shyly take it. He helps you onto the bike, and you wrap your arms around his waist as you rest your chin on his shoulder. “Will you tell me where we’re going now?”

Hyunjae chuckles and nods his head as he revs the engine of the motorcycle. He looks up towards the sky, and he can’t help but feel warmth flood his chest at the fact the two of you were given a second chance. 

He smiles softly at the memory of the grass field as he quietly answers,

“To a place I used to know.”

#lee jaehyun x reader #lee hyunjae x reader #hyunjae x reader #ficscafe #the boyz x reader #the boyz imagines #the boyz scenarios #the boyz fanfic #the boyz fic #the boyz fluff #the boyz angst #the boyz oneshot #lee jaehyun #lee hyunjae #hyunjae scenarios #lee hyunjae fluff #hyunjae fluff #lee hyunjae angst #hyunjae angst #lee hyunjae oneshots #lee hyunjae scenarios

[hcuyk]

OUR INFERNO | CHAPTER ONE

SYNOPSIS ✧ despite being your greatest archnemesis/rival/enemy/frenemy/whateverthefuck he was, hyunjae had always been by your side. that changed when your boyfriend was brought up, creating a newfound rift in your whateverthefuck relationship with hyunjae

PAIRING ✧ rival!hyunjae x fem!reader

GENRE ✧ high school au, enemies to fwb, angst, smut, fluff(?), humor(?) (these mfs bicker a lot), pining

WARNINGS ✧ 18+ MINORS DO NOT INTERACT — cheating, profanity, mentions of physical fight/bruises, underaged drinking, obsessive/possessive hyunjae : NSFW TAGS :  outdoor/semipublic sex, dubcon recording, spit/drool/tears, oral and fingering (fem receiving), penetration, scratching/ripping, humping, minimal praise, degradation, sub!hyunjae for 0.002 seconds, petnames (princess, good girl, babe/baby, slut)

WORD COUNT ✧ 19k

⋮≡ [ OUR INFERNO EXCLUSIVE ] @deoboyznet @flwoie @sanaxo-o — fill out the form or comment/send an ask/dm to be added!

. . . . . . OUR INFERNO M.LIST ✩ next [ TWO ]

⋮≡ [ PERMANENT TAGLIST ] @armysantiny @stealanity @zzoguri @nyujjan @tinisprout @the-kpop-simp @sunwoosberrie @winterchimez — fill out the form or comment/send an ask/dm to be added!

THE BOYZ MASTERLIST | NAVIGATION

AUTHOR'S NOTE : in honor of my three years of officially stanning the boyz on this very day, let's celebrate with my smut debut and writing comeback 😋 enjoy my loves

PART ONE: CHASING THE SPARK (THE FIRE TETRAHEDRON) — fuel, oxygen, and heat | CHAPTER ONE

“Genuine question.”

“Shoot.”

“Who the fuck does Hyunjae actually think he is?”

Unphased by your up-and-coming rage rant, Kevin resumed snacking on the protein bar he had brought with him. He tossed his free arm over the camera equipment and backpacks sitting next to him on the bench, watching you stride back and forth within one of the many hallways in the recreational center. 

“Well, he is your boss.”

“No, he’s the student executive producer,” you corrected, your legs unwavering as you kept a consistent pace to release your frustrations. Kevin shrugged and tossed one leg over the other, staying relaxed despite the hot fumes emanating from your upright and angered figure. You paused momentarily to look him in the eye. 

“Emphasis on the student,” you clarified.

“Emphasis on the executive, Y/N.”

Baffled at how he was defending your greatest archnemesis (well, more like your greatest frenemy), you ignored his rebuttal and started pacing again. Your steps slowed as you envisioned the sensations you experienced just minutes before, back when you, Kevin, and Hyunjae were at the indoor pool to report for your school’s broadcasting channel. Technically, you were the one reporting and filming while Hyunjae was the subject of interest, and Kevin was there for physical support. 

Chills latched onto your skin as you remembered what it felt like to have Hyunjae’s bare torso looming over you, his eyes peering over your shoulder to glance at your footage. While staring at the camera, his gentle, irregular breaths would continuously hit your skin. Water from the pool would trickle down his hair and into your shirt, reaching your backside. When it happened, you could barely comprehend Hyunjae’s ‘advice’ and instead focused on feeling every cold droplet travel through the crevasses created by your spine. You winced at the thought of that happening again, yet somehow you could still hear his irritating voice near your ear, telling you all the reasons why your B-roll of his lap swimming was ‘trash’ and ‘unusable.’

For a moment, you stood there in the hallway frozen, unsure of how to move, before realizing you were just reliving a moment from earlier and that Hyunjae was still in the locker room changing.

“I’m going to make a complaint,” you declared, turning back towards Kevin for his encouragement. Alternatively, you were met with the sight of your best friend completely failing to conceal his judgment and disapproval towards your suggestion.

“Against Hyunjae? You gotta be kidding, right?”

“Yes,” you answered confidently. “Wait, I mean no, I’m not kidding, but yes, against Hyunjae.”

Kevin eyed you skeptically, trying to decipher why you felt threatened enough to report someone like Hyunjae. You may not have spent all your previous years in high school with an affinity for Hyunjae, but it wasn’t like you hated him either—not in the way you truly loathed others. If that were the case, you wouldn’t spend nearly every day with him, bickering until the sun chose to set.

“Sure, maybe my B-roll was trash, I can attest to that, but that does not give his bitchass the right to not only shit on how ‘awful’ I was doing, but also yank the camera out of my hands and delete all the footage I got because they weren’t ‘perfect enough.’ What kind of psycho is that?” You glanced over at Kevin, trying once again to get him to back you up, but the most he gave was a slight nod. Everything you were spurting was half-mindedly being decoded because he had ended up placing more significance on inhaling protein. Regardless, you continued.

“And you would think, hey! As the student executive producer of a high school broadcasting team, he would understand that no! I indeed do not record half-naked people swimming in a pool, whether it be for a career or a hobby. He should also at least have the decency to not swim seven hundred miles per minute while I’m recording. Of course I’m not going to catch up, especially when he barely told me how he wanted things to be recorded? Isn’t he fucking insane for that? Not to mention all the goddamn splashing because of how fucking long his limbs are—”

“You’re explaining this like I didn’t witness the whole exchange,” Kevin grumbled.

“And you would think he knows, right? That Mr. Executive-slash-Captain-of-the-Swim-Team should either be more considerate when, A, he’s kicking water in my direction when he’s swimming or, B, station me away from the edge of the pool? Just a thought, but fuck me, I guess.”

“Well yeah, but the—”

“Also! Not to mention the camera has the fucking ability to zoom in, so why was there even a need for me to stand by the pool anyway?” You scoffed at the absurdity, almost tempted to cackle like a villain because of it. “The least he could do was tell me how to record it or find a way to adjust and compromise without occasionally soaking me with water on purpose, which I know damn well he was—”

“That’s just how-”

“We have a tripod, for god’s sake!” you exclaimed. By now, Kevin had given up on providing you with his input. He opted to rest against the wall, finishing up whatever he had left of the protein bar, and occasionally would roll his eyes.

“But even then, who the fuck wants to see him swim anyway? We’ll probably only need like…what? A minute of the footage for the B-roll? So why the hell is he treating it like it’s about to be nominated by the goddamn Oscars for Best Picture? He just loves to nitpick and control me like a fucking puppet—”

“Keep talking and you’ll potentially strain your throat,” a new voice interrupted.

You jerked around to find Hyunjae, the culprit of your rant, exiting the locker room with a small duffle bag that contained both his swim gear and his school clothes from earlier in the day. His brown hair was only halfway dry, some strands still stuck to his forehead as he approached where you were pacing.

You halted in your path and stared him down. Hyunjae immediately caught onto the mood you were in, and instead of being shocked or hurt, he grinned.

“You.” 

Your attempt at threatening him with one word made Hyunjae laugh.

“Hey, I’m just looking out for you.”

“Oh here we go again,” Kevin mumbled, tossing the wrapper of the protein bar to the side. He pulled out his phone and went on TikTok, deciding it was more worthy of his attention than listening to you two banter—something he had been experiencing for well over five years.

As a mutual friend of yours and Hyunjae’s since middle school, Kevin understood the frenemy dynamic better than either of you. Eventually, over the long years he had known you both, he learned to leave you two be. 

“What about me, though? Are you going to try and tattletale on me?” Hyunjae feigned sympathy as he gave you an exaggerated pout, tilting his head like a puppy’s. “C’mon. I’m just doing my job.”

“Sorry, but I don’t remember ‘being a dick’ being listed under the requirements for your oh-so-important position of power.” You huffed at him and crossed your arms, choosing to face elsewhere as you rooted the soles of your feet to the ground.

Hyunjae furrowed his brows, his eyes never leaving you, as he addressed the third party within the shared space.

“Kevin, was I being a dick, or is Y/N exaggerating?”

Kevin glanced up at his phone and scrunched his nose at Hyunjae in annoyance.

“Don’t even try to bring me into whatever…this mess is.”

“No, tell him,” you demanded, now looking at him. Your glare was enough to burn Kevin into ashes, but it was nothing compared to Hyunjae’s gaze piercing into your back. Knowing that he never looked away made you shiver, hating how fixated he seemed to be—and seemingly without reason too.

“Listen, I wasn’t being a dick. I was treating you the same way I treat everyone else. I’d honestly argue that you’re just narcissistic and think everything is about you when—”

“Oh wow, thank you for admitting that you’re a dick to everyone else!” You tossed your hands up for dramatic appeal as you spun back around to look at him. He scoffed, but his demeanor was quickly shadowed by a smirk that appeared on his lips, testing you with the arch of his brow.

“Oh really? Do you see anyone else complaining?”

“I’m complaining,” Kevin muttered.

“People don’t complain because they’re scared of you, Sherlock,” you retorted. At this point, Hyunjae had already caught onto your bullshit of making evidence up, and it was why this exchange ended up lasting for as long as it did. Nevertheless, his ego continued to build the more you spoke.

“You’re not scared of me?”

And you keep falling for the bait.

“Why should I? You’re nothing.” You approached him and pressed a finger into his chest, taunting him as you stared straight into his eyes.

Suddenly a competition seemed to have materialized because now you both were locking eyes, too stubborn to look away. 

“One day you’ll wake up and realize your position doesn’t mean shit. You take it too seriously and make everyone’s job your job when this should be a learning experience for the rest of us.”

“And who exactly is ‘us,’ babe?”

You narrowed your eyes at him.

“Don’t call me that–”

“And it’s also starting to sound like jealousy to me.” Hyunjae’s eyes finally shifted, but instead of looking away from you like you initially wanted him to, you trailed his line of sight down to your lips. He eyed them shamelessly—technically making you win the unspoken eye contact competition, but at what cost? “I won’t believe you until I receive firm evidence and testimonies from the other students in the club, then maybe I’ll consider your concerns. Deal?”

What you despised most was how well Hyunjae knew and provoked you to get under your skin. He was a raging flame, making your blood boil from both irritation and excitement. You couldn’t pinpoint exactly what it was, but after nearly six years of banter with Hyunjae, you knew damn well you enjoyed every second of it. It was like a nonstop competition, and you were always on the edge of winning.

Maybe it was also because you were so used to him constantly being above you. He was the president of the student council, the swim team’s captain, and specifically the one who snatched the executive position away from you in the broadcasting team, yet somehow you were still able to compete at his level of arrogance and egotism. 

Even though you may never be able to top him in the foreseeable future, you at least knew how to match his fury—his fire, with your own.

“You’re pathetic.” You took a few steps back to gain some distance while his eyes flickered back up to yours. He bit his lip playfully, his smile only growing even wider.

“Woah, Y/N. Exposing my degradation kink so soon?”

“I-...you- w-what?!” you sputtered, your jaw falling slack as Kevin’s head snapped up, staring at the two of you in disgust.

“Get a room—!”

“I’m going to make sure you get degraded from your position, you freak!”

“Not exactly how that word works, princess, but I’m glad you’re at least passionate.” His cooing made you want to slap the living shit out of him, your eyes protruding from their sockets are you glared. 

“Are you fucking bricked up or something right now—?”

“Hey guys,” a woman’s voice called out. Your heads turned to look at the end of the hallway, catching one of the recreational center’s workers waving in your general direction. She pressed her lips together and smiled, attempting to be as professional and understanding as possible. “I’m sorry to interrupt, but is it okay if you guys turn it down a notch?”

You and Hyunjae both nodded and whispered apologies, feeling like kids who just got scolded for shoving paintbrushes down the drain. Fortunately, the worker’s smile radiated genuine warmth and consideration, providing you some sort of reassurance that you guys weren’t too much of a disturbance (even though you guys totally were).

“You two are the most childish fuckers I know,” Kevin deadpanned, finally shoving his phone away as he switched between looking at you and the man by your side. His eyebrows bunched up.

“And apparently horny too.”

“I would move across the country if it meant I never had to see him again,” you grumbled, striding back to the pile of equipment to pick up your backpack and the bag with all your reporting necessities (boring script, stationary, and a couple of notebooks shared with all the broadcasting students to collect notes and inspiration in). 

“Hello? I’m still here.”

“Look at that. He already misses me.”

“I’m going to hurl,” Kevin unnecessarily announced, and Hyunjae’s face soured.

“Ew.”

“Exactly. That’s how you two make me feel whenever you guys are together.” Kevin got up on his feet and grabbed the wrapper to shove into one of his pockets (no littering, kids) before outstretching his limbs dramatically. 

“I swear I developed back pain from always listening to you guys bicker.”

“Or, hot take,” Hyunjae interjected, “maybe it’s because you’re always sitting with your back arching forward like it belongs in the Arches National Park–”

“Yeah yeah, shut the fuck up.” Kevin waved him off with his hand and rolled his eyes. “I came here to help carry stuff, not listen to your bullshit.”

He picked up the bag that contained the camera and passed it to Hyunjae. He offered to hold one more thing, but with only his backpack and the tripod left, Kevin didn’t see much need for his friend’s assistance. 

Kevin then faced you, his face stern and rid of emotion.

“You too, Y/N,” he stated seriously. “None of this ‘he said this,’ ‘he said that,’ ‘please fuck me’ bullshit from you either.”

You gaped at him, arms wrapped tightly around the crew’s bag.

“Now why the hell do you think—”

“Zip it.”

Without giving you much of an opportunity to continue, Kevin sped off in front of you, ready to leave the building. You couldn’t even look at Hyunjae as heat rushed to your cheeks, struggling to trail after Kevin’s speedy steps.

Despite carrying heavier items, Hyunjae caught up to you with ease. You wanted nothing more than for Hyunjae’s feet to either slow down or speed up tremendously, but of course he purposely chose to walk by your side, attached to you by the hip.

“He sees it,” Hyunjae sing-songed. “Everyone sees it.”

“Sees what?” you snorted, oblivious to what he was indicating.

“That you want me,” he replied nonchalantly.

The moment you two stepped outside the doors of the center, you stopped to face him, trying to confirm what exactly he was implying.

“You can’t be serious.”

Hyunjae, who also stopped with your steps, shrugged.

“You’re the one in denial.”

Realizing that he was serious, you felt every muscle in your body tense up.

“Hyunjae,” you stated firmly. “I have a boyfriend, remember?”

Instead of receiving something witty from Hyunjae like normal, his relaxed facial features suddenly scrambled into one that expressed remote shock. His lips were slightly parted, eyes searching yours for any hint that indicated you were lying or messing around with him, but you were serious.

The aggressive playfulness from earlier had evaporated faster than boiling water, and you watched as he became stilled. Your heart started pounding, anxiety creeping up within you due to not being able to read Hyunjae like you normally do.

“Since when?” he asked. His voice was quiet, his tone firmer, and by now, Kevin was already by his car, too far from the two of you to understand what was going on. Hell, even you could barely understand what was happening.

“Earth to Hyunjae?” you joked, nervously laughing in an attempt to eliminate the newfound tension looming in the atmosphere. “It’s always been Jiwoong, remember?”

For a moment, Hyunjae could feel his mouth drying up. All his thoughts were held captive in his throat, and his lips remained parted as if they weren’t meant to collide at all. He stared at you like you had just teleported in front of him.

“Y/N,” he stated calmly, “he cheated on you.”

Your initial response was to get defensive, claiming that you already knew that because hell, it was your relationship, but then your brain acknowledged the true elephant in the conversation.

“How-...how the hell do you know about that?”

“I- You know word just-…That doesn’t matter. What matters is why in the world—”

“It was a mistake, okay?”

“A mistake?” As Hyunjae’s brows raised, so did his tone. “You know, people—decent people, don’t make mistakes like that.” 

Seeing how Hyunjae was gritting his teeth, how his eyes were locked on yours, built up a foreign frustration within you. Something about the way Hyunjae was behaving felt like he was trying to control you. 

All the rage from before had now returned, yet this time, there was no more leniency from you—not when Hyunjae was being more condescending than he had ever been.

“You know nothing, Hyunjae, so frankly, I really don’t care about what you think about my relationship with my boy-”

“You’re still with him??”

“Look,” you snapped. “Just because you have the luxury of crushing my hopes and dreams on a daily basis, it does not give you the right to dictate what’s wrong or right about my love life and my decisions. Understood?”

And just like how you always are, Hyunjae refused to shut up.

“How is it dictating when it’s common sense to dump a shitty person?” He dropped the bags onto the ground, and not once did he look away from you. “He’s never treated you well either, and you know that—”

“It’s not your decision to make,” you repeated. You could feel the three key elements of creating a fire stir up within you. You had the fuel, the oxygen, and the heat, and Hyunjae was the chemical chain reaction that would set it off. “How dense can you fucking be to not back down?”

“He cheated on you,” he reasserted, and there was a rage in his eyes that you had never once encountered. “He’s done so many shitty things, and he hasn’t changed–”

“Again, none of your fucking business–”

“And I’m pretty sure I saw—”

“I am not going to repeat myself-”

“Can’t you just listen to what I-”

“Drop it.” You were seconds away from yelling at him, ready to unleash all your anger because never once has someone threatened your love life—Jiwoong, the man you considered your soulmate. Your flame had officially engulfed his, and all Hyunjae could do was stare at you in disbelief and disappointment.

Turning to look away, you gazed up into the sky and scoffed, not understanding why tears had begun to pool up in your eyes. At the end of the day, Hyunjae meant nothing to you—you didn’t even consider him a friend.

After moments of experiencing what it was like to be suffocated by a tension so unbearable, you eventually found a way to ground yourself. 

“I can’t blame him, you know,” you whispered, using the back of your hand to wipe away your tears. “We were angry. He just–...he needed an outlet, and at that time, that outlet happened to not be me, okay?”

Hyunjae stared at you, his mouth desperate to say something, anything, to make you see what he sees—a relationship that isn’t meant to be. That you didn’t deserve to be treated this way. Maybe you were no more than an acquaintance to him, but he knew you have always deserved better. 

“He isn’t someone worth fighting for.”

“And that’s none of your business,” you scowled.

“It isn’t right—”

“Stay in your fucking lane, Jae.”

Hyunjae clamped his mouth shut, and the sight of you completely breaking down tore him apart. Possibly it was all the years you spent together growing up, constantly arguing, yet he knew he was always one to look out for you.

You sucked in a cheek, gnawing at it as your chest urged for you to forgive him, to apologize for lashing out without much notice, but in the end, you prioritized your pride over him.

Not only was Hyunjae’s persistence a stab to your heart, but you suspected that Kevin was the one who told him. By spilling your secrets, it was as if Kevin saw the knife that impaled you and yanked it out of your chest, causing you to bleed to your death.

“I’m done with this conversation,” you muttered, dropping the bag in your arms to the ground by his feet. Your plans had changed to you walking home alone, wanting nothing to do with the other two boys for the next hour or so.

When you turned around to walk away, you knew Hyunjae was going to try and say something. You knew him best whenever he was at his worst, so you spun around to face him for the last time that day to cut him off.

“Never fucking cross that line with me again, got it?”

And with that, you left. 

//

Kevin apologized to you the morning after.

He normally drove you to school, and you debated getting into his car when he showed up. Thankfully you chose to do otherwise because the second you stepped inside, Kevin was apologizing profusely. He talked about how anxious he was all night when Hyunjae told him what happened, and he wouldn’t have known what to do if you didn’t forgive him. Obviously you did, and the rest of the car ride was spent with him explaining his side of the story.

According to Kevin, he only told Hyunjae about how you got cheated on because it seemed like Hyunjae already knew. As Kevin recalled the whole scene, you two assessed the signs, such as how Hyunjae didn’t provide any sort of reaction when Kevin dropped the news. In fact, it had seemed like Hyunjae had brought it up to Kevin instead.

Regardless, it became the last of your worries because all that mattered was that you were back to being on good terms with your best friend.

But avoiding Hyunjae felt like lighting a match in the rain. 

It was your agonizing reality for the next two months, and although you could argue that you had gotten closer to your boyfriend during the supposed ‘Hyunjae Drought,’ you were still plagued with him being everywhere around you.

He was in all your classes, and you never truly processed the extent of how involved Hyunjae had always been throughout high school with you. You weren’t on the swim team, but you were stuck with him during meetings for both the broadcasting team and student council. 

Yet it all felt so different.

Unless he was called on, Hyunjae would talk much less unprovoked and would never look at you during meetings. When he would address the entire team, he would glance at you for a split second before looking elsewhere, no longer watching you like a hawk.

You had also gotten quieter because without Hyunjae to banter with, you recognized that you barely had friends in any of those classes either. 

There was no longer a fight between your flames, and you two kept as much distance as possible. You were thankful that there hadn’t been an instance that interrupted that, such as being forced to record more B-roll with him, and you could only hope that the rest of your senior year would remain the same. 

Then you would never have to see him in college.

Now you were back to being the mediocre student that faded into the background. People knew your name at best, but none have ever tried to become your friend aside from Kevin. No matter how involved you tried to get, the closest you were to anyone was a classmate. 

Hyunjae had always overshadowed you too, and for the first time in years, you were detached from his fumes—yet somehow, some way, the smoke from his fire would remain in your lungs, continuing to suffocate you even more than it had before. It didn’t give you that breath of fresh air of new friends or a better life; instead, it helped you realize that you didn’t matter. It was a miracle that you even scored Jiwoong as your boyfriend.

But then that begged the question: why did Hyunjae bother spending his time ridiculing you?

From the very beginning, you had always meant something to him, and you couldn’t pinpoint how or why. When there was no competition in academics, he treated it as if there was. Every time you ranted, he would listen, whether it be about him or something else. Even when you talked about how your chicken from the cafeteria was burnt, he would give you his own before calling you stupid for not noticing until you sat down.

He never shrugged you off like you were nothing or shut you down because your emotions were invalid. He entertained you each time with ease, and most importantly, he knew when to respect your boundaries. Hyunjae was probably the most mindful person you knew and could often tell when you were distressed or needed another form of reaction from him.

He knew when to stop.

Yet when it came to the one instance involving Jiwoong, he crossed the line multiple times. Why?

“Hyunjae isn’t here today.”

“Huh?”

“Didn’t show up for a single class.”

Kevin watched you play with your food with a fork, rolling the cold, barely spherical peas around and into the stale rice.

“That’s not like him,” he replied.

“Yeah.”

“I wonder why.”

“I wonder too.” 

After the driest possible conversation in existence, you sighed and dropped your fork into your tray.

“I need to stop forgetting to pack myself lunch. This shit makes me lose my appetite, I swear. We should call the police and tell them the food they’re serving is illegal and a disgrace to this country.” 

“Keep it away before I lose my appetite too.” 

You didn’t react nor respond to what Kevin said, letting the conversation rot as you pouted at your food. The cafeteria was unusually louder today, making it easier to space out into thought.

Kevin took out his sandwich with a wide grin and started eating, grateful he never had to deal with what the school was feeding thanks to his mom, but eventually his eyes shifted over to you. You were unmoving with your gaze locked onto an empty spot on the table, so after moments of debating between asking you what’s wrong and ignoring you to devour his lunch, he opted to set his sandwich aside and stared straight at you.

“Why are you thinking about him?”

That was enough to garner your attention, your head snapping up to stare at your best friend like he was the craziest person you knew for mentioning Hyunjae, much less suggesting that your mind was wrapped around him.

“What?”

“Hyunjae. With his perfect attendance, a day without him should be a blessing, yet you brought up how he didn’t show up today and then moped harder than anyone I’ve ever seen mope. You should be over the moon, dancing on the tables and stealing people’s food, not-...” Kevin waved a finger at you, “whatever this is. You seem out of it.”

“Well it’s not because of Hyunjae, I’ll tell you that,” you snorted. Your eyes fell back down to your tray, and the more you looked at it, the more nauseous you got. You scrunched your nose. “If anything, it’s probably because of this shit food.”

Kevin rolled his eyes before tearing his sandwich into halves. You perked at the sight and ogled the half Kevin taunted you with. You were about to thank him and take it into your possession before Kevin jerked back his arm, making you whine.

“Throw away your food, then I’ll give you it.”

“Fine,” you grumbled. As Kevin returned to his delicious, most scrumptious, packed lunch you had ever seen, you picked up your tray and walked it to the nearest trash can. As you dropped the whole thing inside, you heard your name being called.

“Y/N!”

You whipped around to check to see who it was and smiled at the sight of Eunseo waving at you. You wouldn’t consider her a good friend, but you knew her well enough since she was the vice president of the student council.

She ran over to you with a stack of paper in her arms, relieved to have caught you. 

“Y/N, hi! I’m so glad I found you. I was scared I wouldn’t because of how packed it is.”

She flashed you her usual glowing smile, and you noticed that she was a bit more giddy than usual, making you question why she was choosing to talk to you in the first place. All your conversations normally took place before, during, and after student council meetings, so this was slightly out of character.

“What’s up?” you asked. As you looked at her, you noticed how her outfit was slightly more put together than it normally was. She had on a cute top that suited her chest perfectly and a skirt that you had never seen her wear. 

“Your outfit’s really cute today.”

“Really?!” Her bright demeanor then faded into concern. “Wait, is it too noticeable or out of the blue? Is it bad?”

“No, no. Not at all!” you reassured. “It’s just the right amount of perfect.”

“Great! God, that means the world coming from you. It’s because!...” She stopped to glance around, making sure that no one was eavesdropping, before taking a step closer to whisper. “It’s because I was finally asked out on a date by my crush!”

She could barely contain her excitement, holding back a squeal with her bottom lip latched between her teeth. Her sunshine-like energy made you grin.

“That’s great! I’m glad you’re making progress.” Your eyebrows pinched as you tried to recall the last time Eunseo had updated you about her crush. “You’ve been pining after him for so long—whoever ‘him’ is, anyway.”

The question of who Eunseo liked had always gone unanswered. She never told anyone, not even the ones who knew her best, but she loved gushing about her mystery crush to everyone she knew. All people really knew, you included, was how down bad she was.

A part of you wondered if it was someone you knew—someone pretty like Juyeon or well-known like…Hyunjae.

“Oh, I wish I could tell you, and maybe I will if things go really well and we become official!” She squealed and hopped in her spot, unable to resist giving you a half-hug with her free arm. “This is so exciting, Y/N!”

“I’m really happy for you.” Your smile was genuine until you thought about why she was looking for you, starting to doubt that she called you over just so she could tell you about her date. 

“I’ll let you know how it goes, swear. But! That aside, I also have something for you.”

You knew it.

Your brows raised, and when you didn’t catch on, she gestured to the papers in her arms with guilt.

“I know this is kind of a dick move, and I’m really really sorry, but I promised to put up fliers for prom today. My date is right after my last class.” Her frown had deepened, and for a split second, you found yourself sympathizing with her because who wanted to let down such a cheerful personality, especially when this was life-changing for her?

“So you want me to do it?”

“Exactly! Please, that would be great. It shouldn’t take too long, too.”

You thought about how you would have to give up an evening of playing on your switch or extra time to study for an upcoming exam, but you knew it was your duty as secretary to help out whenever needed.

Not to mention that it would also make you a decent friend not to hold Eunseo back from her soon-to-be love life despite her poor date planning. If you were in her shoes, you would have wanted her to do the same for you too.

“Sure,” you accepted. “Why not?”

“You’re the best, seriously!” She handed you the fliers as she began to fill you in on the extra details.

“I already told Mr. Barajas that I wasn’t feeling well and that you were going to do it, so he said it all worked out and to not worry about it,” she rambled, happy to give the extra weight (both literally and metaphorically) to you. “I just printed these out, so everything should be perfect to go. Oh, and don’t worry about any extras! Just set them on Barajas’s desk when you’re finished. Hyunjae will also be in 142 with tape ready for you.”

The mention of the forbidden name nearly made every cell in your body halt. 

“What?”

Eunseo tilted her head at you, confused, before finally realizing.

“Oh crap, I forgot! I’m so sorry, I really did forget you guys weren’t on good terms. I hope it’s okay that he’s helping you out. I mean, he’s supposed to, but it was meant for him and me to do it together, not you two, so…God, I’m really sorry Y/N.”

Before you could even react to the newfound information, she continued.

“I really have to go now. Thank you again! I promise I’ll make it up to you!” And with her rosy pink cheeks and a stunning shade of red on her lips, she basically skipped away and waved goodbye to you with a smile, so you reciprocated it with an awkward one of your own. 

When she turned her back, your smile immediately dropped and you sighed heavily.

“Have fun on your date,” you mumbled, your eyes falling to fliers in your arms. As you skimmed the one on top, you noticed it was to promote going to prom while also including a big QR code to vote for who should be your school’s prom king and queen. You expected it since it was the last meeting’s topic of discussion, but what you weren’t aware of was who were listed as nominees.

There were eight names listed under ‘Prom Court,’ and while you expected Hyunjae’s, Eunseo’s, and your boyfriend’s names on it, your jaw nearly hit the ground at the sight of your own. 

//

With every passing class period, your anxiety would kick up a notch.

The dread of talking to the face you had been avoiding for two months engulfed you, and it caused you to develop the urge to ditch your current class to go hunt for Jacob, the student council’s historian. You wanted nothing more than to dump the stack of fliers into his arms, and knowing Jacob, he wouldn’t ask any questions. Hell, you were certain that if you asked him nicely, he would do it for you because of how naturally sweet and endearing he was.

But the guilt of ditching your secretary duties kept picking at your skin, and besides, all you had to do was treat Hyunjae like a colleague. That should be easy, right?

As you suffered through the last few minutes of class and your teacher’s incessant ramblings about the upcoming exam, your thoughts drifted over to what would happen the moment you stepped into room 142.

Hyunjae hadn’t shown up to a single class all day, yet he was expected to set up fliers after school. As your thoughts snowballed, you arrived at the baseless conclusion that maybe Eunseo wasn’t aware that Hyunjae was absent today, therefore someone else (like Jacob) would take over. 

Suddenly, your back had straightened with feigned interest in your teacher’s last few words. Something about Jacob being there instead of Hyunjae had excited you; it felt like you were free and that the universe was listening to your prayers. The gamble of seeing whether it would be Hyunjae or Jacob (or literally anyone else) had your right leg bouncing, eyes on the clock, and when the bell rang, you shot up from your seat, backpack over your shoulders and fliers in your arms, before dashing out of the classroom.

You sped down the hallway to 142, Mrs. Zhang’s room for Chemistry, bug-eyed, before having your delusions crushed at the sight of Hyunjae’s stupidly large height leaning against one of the counters. Your feet stood glued to the ground by the doorway, your eyes locked onto him. 

Covered from head to toe in sweats, Hyunjae was immersed in whatever was on his phone, scrolling through something as his brown curls peeked out from inside his hood. Without any hint of him acknowledging your presence, your shattered hopes slowly began to rebuild.

Maybe if you were quiet enough, you could sneak out with the tape and do everything on your own, avoiding him at all. Actually, scratch that. You didn’t even need the tape. All you had to do was go to another teacher’s room, steal their tape for half an hour, and then return it with ease.

The plan was effortless, and you mentally smacked your forehead for not thinking of it earlier. Right as you were about to execute it, your backpack slammed against the doorframe as you turned on your heels. 

“Nice try.”

You groaned out of embarrassment (and slight pain) and forced yourself to turn around. Hyunjae’s phone was now face down on the counter, and his arms were crossed over his abdomen. His face remained stoic as his eyes met yours, wielding a tension you didn’t recognize.

Now that you could properly look at him, you noticed a few details that you hadn’t before, such as the small tear on his lower lip and the bandaid on his cheekbone. If you looked long enough, you could catch light patches of purple across his skin, and the sight hindered all your thoughts, your brain too occupied with piecing together how he ended up like this. 

“What happened?” you blurted, your gaze shooting up from his lips to his eyes.

Hyunjae staggered at your suddenty, but he managed to keep himself stilled, his brows pinching. 

“What do you mean?”

Even if Hyunjae didn’t mean to, his question became an invitation for your unfiltered thoughts to spill out of your mouth.

“You didn’t show up for any of our classes today,” you began, “but now you’re here? For some stupid fliers? You’re barely dressed properly like you normally are, your hair isn’t straightened, you look pale, Jae, and what’s up with the bruises or the bandaid on your cheek–”

“Are you seriously psychoanalyzing me?” he asked with a scoff. There was no humor in his tone. Instead, it looked as if he was irritated, perhaps even more than you were. 

Hyunjae barely met your eyes, and his arms closed himself off from you. 

“What–?”

“You’re evaluating me like I’m some sort of lab project, Y/N.”

“No, no I’m not,” you rejected. “I’m just saying things are a little off.” You kept your eyes firm on his, even as he pushed himself off the counter with his phone and made his way over to you. “And you know, you really can’t blame me for being somewhat worried when one, you don’t show up, and two, you look like a whole mess—”

“Just hand over the fliers—” he interrupted, gritting his teeth as he outstretched his arm in your direction. You dodged him by turning your body 180 degrees and stood your ground.

“What happened?” you repeated, this time more firmly.

Hyunjae looked at you, a blank expression on his face, before turning back around to grab the roll of tape left on the teacher’s desk. When he returned, he shoved it into your arms while simultaneously stealing half the stack. You protested with an exclaimed ‘Hey!’ yet he didn’t bat an eye and skimmed over the contents of the flier on top.

Bothered by his lack of response, you frowned and made sure to block the doorway, refusing to let him leave until you received answers.

“Why are you acting like this? Pretending that I’m not even—”

“I’ll do upstairs, you do downstairs,” he muttered.

“Did you get into a fight? Why weren’t you here today? Why are you here now—”

“You’d think you’d know,” he finally answered, pushing past you like you weighed none less than a feather.

Your brain had fully malfunctioned at that point, unable to decipher what he meant as Hyunjae walked off to the nearest staircase. As his footsteps echoed down the hall, you thought about what he was implying yet came to no resolution. Did he assume that you were caught up in your school’s latest gossip? Or that you were the main admin for his biggest fan page on Instagram?

The idea made you snort, and you scowled bitterly at his childish attitude. It wasn’t like you were a complete stranger intruding on his personal life—hell, you felt like you deserved an explanation because of how you were forced to do this with him. 

As you stormed off past the remaining lingering students to the nearest bulletin board, you questioned how you were going to do this on your own. 

You had put up fliers countless times in the past few years yet never alone. Luckily, you had a general idea of where the fliers should go when it came to the school’s hallways, but as you approached your first destination, you struggled with ripping off pieces of tape while holding the stack at the same time. It would’ve been easier with a partner by your side, one who either did the tape ripping or placing of the fliers, but you weren’t desperate enough to fall into the role of a helpless princess in need of her pretty (useless) prince. 

After some trial and error, you found a method that consisted of setting the stack on the ground occasionally so you could rip off pieces of tape. Then you would slap said pieces of tape onto your wrist, having them readily available as you put up a few fliers at a time.

Although slightly time-consuming, it was working well and kept you at a steady pace until you heard crashing footsteps behind you from afar. Without paying any mind to it, you bit back your curiosity in order to focus on the wall in front of you, but then you made the mistake of taking a step back, bumping into the person who was sprinting. 

You lost your balance and fell forward before catching yourself shortly after. However, the fliers had already flown out of your arms, scattering across and down the long hallway.

Ready to curse out the offender for running down the hallway, you were surprised when you saw that it was Eunseo behind you, pouring out apologies while a loopy grin was smacked onto her face.

You steadied your anger and told her it was okay, getting down onto your knees to collect all the fliers. Her ‘sorry’s could only go so far with her smeared lipstick, a dazed gaze, and her hair holding the mold to someone else’s (presumably her crush’s) hands in them, but you still excused her, knowing that she was over the moon right now.

“It’s okay, Eunseo, I promise.” You forced out a chuckle as you crawled to scavenge for the ones that flew a few feet away.

“I really didn’t mean to,” she pouted, but it was shortly followed up with bubbly giggles. “God, Y/N, can you believe this? Oh, it’s going so well! I think I love him, I do.”

“Good for you,” you grumbled, hoping that she didn’t hear it as you continued to move down the hallway, hating how far the fliers had escaped from you. You also hated how she just stood there without intent on helping you at all. 

“I have to really go now. Got volleyball practice soon, but I think I’m seeing him tomorrow too!” She waved you goodbye.

And just like that, she continued running off. 

You stared at how you were only able to collect half the mess, hating how Eunseo had somehow managed to delay you even further from being in the comfort of your bed. You were also salty at how her date was taking place at the school, wishing she could’ve dragged him around while she taped stuff up before getting dick-downed of some sort.

Deciding that she and her business weren’t worth your time, you continued to pick everything up as quickly as you could, wanting nothing more than to go home.

When you finally finished collecting every last flier, you were prepared to get back into the groove of things before feeling your phone vibrate in the side pocket of your backpack. Wondering if it was something important, you took it out and beamed at the idea of it being a new message from Jiwoong.

Dating him felt like falling in love with him all over again whenever he texted. Your heart would pound in your chest when you thought about him and explode whenever he gave you his attention and time. You were addicted to him, especially knowing that he was yours after liking him since middle school.

So to say you were disappointed was far worse than an understatement. It was from a number you hadn’t saved yet always recognized and undoubtedly remembered by heart.

Of course it was Hyunjae.

You had Hyunjae’s phone number due to previous class projects and group chats, but you had never once saved it because you thought he was undeserving of being a contact in your phone. Nonetheless, with how the years have passed and how much his number infiltrates every group chat you were in, it was only fair that your brain had unintentionally memorized all ten digits.

The message he sent consisted of him saying that he was done with the fliers, and you rolled your eyes. Even after the way he treated you earlier, he still chose to let you know and brag about how fast he was. 

You shoved your phone away vigorously, ready to return to your slapping-fliers-on-walls duty, before perking at the sound of footsteps behind you once more.

Automatically assuming it was Eunseo or another student staying after for a club or sport, you were stunned when you heard his voice. 

“You’re not even halfway yet?”

In no fucking universe are you turning around; not for him.

“Go gloat somewhere else,” you snapped. The next flier you taped up was nearly slammed onto the wall, but Hyunjae was left unphased by your sudden outburst. He stood next to you and remained quiet, even when you left to place the next flier a few feet away on the opposite wall.

When he didn’t follow, you sighed out of relief, yet somehow you couldn’t help but peek at him, eyeing his hands that were tucked into the pockets of his sweatpants. He was staring straight at the lopsided flier you had put up, and when you decided you had enough of peering at him, he was back by your side.

 “What are you doing?” you grumbled. He was the one who pushed you away, yet now here he was, glued to your side like how he was two months ago. 

“You’re taking too long.”

“I had a mishap,” you explained, “but that’s none of your concern.” The lines on your forehead bunched up, and you waved him off, bending down to place the stack on the ground. Figuring it wasn’t weird at all, you continued your method of ripping off pieces of tape and slapping it onto your wrist.

And Hyunjae was totally judging.

“You can’t be serious.”

“Just go home.”

Despite being on the ground and sitting on your heels, you could physically feel the heat on the back of your head due to his eyes burning a hole into your skull, and for a split second, you knew exactly what he was thinking.

“I can do it myself,” you explained. 

“What are you even doing?” 

“Can you just go?” You picked up the stack once again as you rose to your feet, doing your best to avoid whatever look was on Hyunjae’s face. He was probably stifling a laugh or keeping his expression smug, but when you did cave and peek, his face was still solemn, his eyes on your wrist with concern.

“You’re struggling.”

“Thank you for your observation, Mr. Obvious,” you retorted.

“Let me do it.”

Taken aback, you whipped your head over to his direction.

“You’re kidding.”

“You don’t even want to be here,” he reasoned through gritted teeth. “Just go, and you can thank me later.”

“Thank you?!” Appalled at his audacity, you couldn’t help but laugh out of disbelief. “Seriously, Hyunjae? You want me to thank you for stealing my job? Again? You can’t be fucking serious.”

“Because you can’t take any criticism ever, or in this case, any form of help, so just let me do it.”

Hyunjae was eerily calm about the whole ordeal, his energy far from matching yours.

“I do take help,” you refuted. “I just don’t take yours, and neither do I need it, too.”

“You’re so goddamn stubborn.” And within a blink of an eye, he had managed to snatch the stack of fliers from you. 

“Hey!” you yelled, feeling as if it was deja vu from earlier (you really needed to step up your defense), and reached out to take them back, but he was quick to turn his body, shielding them from you.

“Give me the tape and go,” he urged, emotionless. The Hyunjae in front of you now was someone you truly didn’t recognize because the Hyunjae you knew would have made fun of you and held the fliers above your head, teasing you for being so weak.

Yet he stood still, creating a barrier between you and the duty that was forced upon you. You didn’t want to be here anyway, yet you were so insistent on making sure Hyunjae wasn’t stealing your work again. You weren’t incapable, and you hated how he always managed to be faster.

Even now, he was miles away from being playful with you, and yet he still had a way to shove it in your face.

“Hyunjae, I swear—”

“Give me the tape, and you can run off to your little boyfriend waiting for you by the entrance.” 

Your lips parted at his words, eyes wide as you worked to comprehend his words. You questioned how he knew about Jiwoong’s whereabouts, how he knew that Jiwoong was waiting and that you didn’t, but knowing that he was serious, you reluctantly gave up and dropped the roll of tape on the ground, forcing him to pick it up. 

You were sick of constantly arguing with him, and even if he was lying about Jiwoong, at least you would be away from Hyunjae. There was no point in fighting for your dignity anymore, not when Hyunjae’s narcissism was insufferable.

By walking away with heavy and quick strides, you hoped he felt humiliated by how poorly he was treating you—how he had always treated you like this.

As much as you wanted it to be true, you hoped Hyunjae was lying just so you had more evidence against his self-absorbed and shitty personality, but alas, you found Jiwoong standing precisely where Hyunjae said he was.

Regardless, all stress and frustrations had lifted from your being, and you called out to your boyfriend with a smile that would make your cheeks ache in minutes. 

“Woong!” You waved your hands with a small bounce in your steps as you rushed over to him.

Your boyfriend’s head shot up, surprised to see you. His utter shock quickly switches to one of sheer happiness, tucking his device away before opening his arms for you.

“Hey, baby!”

You tossed yourself into his embrace, hugging him tight after pressing a quick kiss to his lips.

“What are you doing here?” With your face in his neck, your voice came out muffled, and it made Jiwoong laugh.

“Had to stay after to discuss my grades with a teacher, then I decided to stay back a bit for you.” He cooed and kissed the top of your head, holding you incredibly close. When you pulled back, his hands had moved from behind your backpack to your hips instead, holding them as you stared up at him.

“You were waiting for me?” you asked, eyes wide with stars in them.

“Of course I was, baby.” 

You were radiating, feeling happier than ever. The last time you saw Jiwoong was a week ago, and with your clashing schedules, you two very rarely get the opportunity to make plans. Your hands rested atop his shoulders, and when he pulled you in for a kiss, you smiled.

But then it fell.

Something felt off.

//

If someone were to inquire Hyunjae about who his heart belonged to, your name would be his answer—whether he intended to say it or not. 

Hyunjae had always been considered the school’s favorite. His intelligence may not be up to par with others, but his authority was what made him a prominent member of your high school. Some blame it on his looks, but most were aware enough to know that wasn’t the case.

Hyunjae knew how to think on his feet, and his problem-solving skills outwitted everyone within his grade level. Reaching tranquillity had never been an issue for him, allowing him to be levelheaded while making decisions. He emitted an aura that made classmates truly listen to him and the ideas he shared, and overall, it made him a great contender to lead every group and organization he was in. 

Additionally, Hyunjae’s heart was what won over most people. His lack of vulnerability seemed to be his only flaw, but it was an obstacle he could overlook when it came to empathizing with others. By actively being involved in the community through volunteering and holding fundraisers, everyone could recognize Hyunjae’s devotion to hope for humanity. 

All these traits were what led Hyunjae up onto the pedestal and the public eye, a household name for all families in the district. Titles and awards naturally gravitated towards him throughout the years, resulting in him winning the vote as president of your school’s student council and enough scholarships to provide him a full ride at most universities.

It was safe to say that competition against Lee Hyunjae was sparse, and you were no different. 

Your grades would teeter around his standard, hence how you two collectively ended up in the same classes, but aside from that, you had nothing else that could compare to what he was capable of.

Except for one thing; your fury.

There was an inferno inside you at all times, and instead of your body shielding off your heart with steel, people around you would come to find out that your heart was the reason for that large blaze of fire, possessing a passion unlike any other. 

Hyunjae had never once seen a peer with as much fight as you. It was a trait only you encapsulated, one that you weren’t afraid to express. You stood up for yourself and your beliefs, and it was easy to pick fights with him when he had been troubling you from the very moment you two were assigned to sit next to each other in seventh-grade algebra. 

Hyunjae yearned for you ever since, his only want being your attention. You gave him the drive to succeed in high school and thrive in his senior year, and he was positive that he wouldn’t be doing this well without a reason to show off in front of you. He wanted your praise, your acknowledgment, but he loved the chase the most. 

Unfortunately, that was the exact reason he ended up here.

The chase was what made him fall for every part of you, wanting nothing more than your lips on his and the ability to have you by his side at all times, but it was also what landed you with your current boyfriend.

It was like his life was a video game with God giving him the hardest difficulty setting by making sure you were obsessed with someone undeserving of all that he wanted. There wasn’t even a chance of you two possibly being friends in your eyes. Meanwhile, Hyunjae would argue that you two had more chemistry than any other couple in your class, but that hope was crushed, shredded, and stomped on when he found out you still devoted your love to Jiwoong.

Regardless, it didn’t change who you were as a person. Your heart was still just as large and beautiful, and your drive to succeed hadn’t lessened. The bickering never faltered, and it wasn’t like Hyunjae was opposed whenever you expressed disgust at the thought of him being turned on because of you (and that was because he found the idea of you thinking about him hot—yes, his expectations were that low). 

So it was why after two months of almost zero to no contact, you treating him as if those months didn’t exist created the largest dilemma he had ever faced. He spent the next week thinking about your intentions and why you seemed to care so much, specifically right after when Hyunjae had willed himself to believe that he meant jackshit to you. You effortlessly toyed with his heart, leaving him in everlasting misery, while you seemed to do completely fine.

What was a typical and ideal lifestyle for you was a nightmare and tormenting hellhole for Hyunjae. He didn’t just crave the warmth and comfort from your undying flames.

He wanted to burn.

Insanity engulfed him on the days spent without you, leaving him to wonder why you had to make things extensively worse by pointing out his absence or how he had put less effort into his hair. Why did it seem like the concern you expressed was genuine? Why pretend that you cared for him as much as he cared for you?

He was going insane—so insane that he drove to a college party with three other friends in his sedan on a Wednesday night. 

It was being held by a fraternity he and his friends were far more than familiar with thanks to Jongin, an upperclassman he met in his sophomore year and remained friends with since then. The beginning of the senior year marked the origin of parties and hook-ups in weak sporadic attempts to get over you. 

At this rate, Hyunjae could argue that he was more experienced than half of the current college freshmen class. Getting girls in bed was the easiest part; the hardest part was forgetting about you. From what was a method created to move on from you became one that prepared him for when you wanted sex with him. 

But with your constant longing for Jiwoong, Hyunjae made sure that this party would be different.

Although accustomed to having sex with various women, Hyunjae had never been one to drink. This was a fact about him that raised brows, specifically Jongin’s when he first tried urging Hyunjae with a drink, but tonight he vowed to change that. He was normally their designated driver, but when Hyunjae informed Sangyeon of his plan, the elder was more than delighted to remain sober so Hyunjae could get a taste of alcohol.

“Hey, man! It’s about time!” Jongin exclaimed the instant he found out about Hyunjae’s willingness to drink, pulling a fresh bottle out of the cooler specifically for his friend.

“That’s what I told him!” Sangyeon projected his voice over the music, giving Hyunjae a supportive pat on the back.

Hyunjae rolled his eyes at his friends’ remarks and thanked Jongin for the beer, hanging around by the counter as the three conversed and caught up. The two laughed at the way Hyunjae’s face scrunched up at the taste, Sangyeon shoving him lightly with the claim that Hyunjae was being overdramatic. 

With his earlier mindless decision of tossing on a mesh long-sleeve shirt over his black tank top, Hyunjae had attracted another partygoer by his side momentarily after his first sip. She wrapped her arms around one of his and inserted herself into the conversation with hopes of getting Hyunjae in bed by the end of the night, and crazily enough, he considered it for a moment before feeling his phone vibrate in his back pocket.

Normally it would be something he’d ignore, but it remained persistent, signifying that he was receiving a call. He didn’t know who would be calling at this hour—well, aside from Minghao and his usual complaints about Hyunjae partying as a high schooler on a school night. 

After setting the glass down on the counter to grab his phone, any urgency to intoxicate himself as quickly as possible vanished the very second he saw your name glowing on his screen. With an awkward retraction of his arm and a forced cough, Hyunjae excused himself and answered the call.

“Hello?”

With music pounding inside his ear canals, it was expected that he couldn’t hear anything you were saying. He navigated through various crowds to reach the entrance of the house, his heart replicating the booming vibrations from the loudspeakers as he prayed that you wouldn’t hang up on him.

“Okay, I…I should be free now,” he stammered after stepping outside. The sudden stillness of Mother Nature was a drastic change from the party scene, coercing him to focus on his racing heartbeat and the anxiety accumulating in his tightening chest. He was breathing heavily, both from pushing through people in a rush and also because of you. 

You never failed to render him weak and helpless, leaving him like a puppy longing for their owner’s guidance.

There was a silence, but he could hear your gentle breaths hitting your phone.

“I need a ride.”

Hyunjae blinked, his body tensing up, as the many thoughts in his brain scrambled to make meaning of what you meant. However, it didn’t matter because you hung up shortly after, leaving him alone to revel in your words.

Your bluntness and suddenty made Hyunjae malfunction, his thoughts leading him to question if he had even heard you correctly. Rarely did you ever reach out to him, and what could you need him for? Especially after lashing out at him and ignoring him for two months? Of course, there was that one day a week ago when you two were forced to talk together, the day he was given a one-day suspension, but you two returned to treating each other like strangers like it was natural.

He stared at his phone in hopes of receiving more information, that you’d perhaps call again to reconfirm or say you had the wrong number. He felt like he was dreaming—that the person he had wanted for so long needed him for once, but he couldn’t help but also believe that this may be the beginning of another nightmare. 

But it was you, and Hyunjae was willing to risk it.

After checking his call logs to make sure he wasn’t hallucinating, he rushed back into the fraternity house, thankful he didn’t proceed with drinking any more than he did. 

He found everyone exactly where he had left them (the girl included) and announced his departure. The girl made sure Hyunjae knew how disappointed she was, but that was his last concern as he grabbed the beer bottle and handed it to Sangyeon, giving him a pat on the back.

“Drink up and find an Uber.”

“No fucking way you’re leaving us this soon, man.” Jongin shook his head in disapproval, his forearms resting against the countertop.

“Another time, I promise, yeah?” Hyunjae started walking away, waving to them as his heart continued to thrum in his chest.

“He’s lying,” Sangyeon snorted, taking a swig before bidding Hyunjae a bitter goodbye. “You owe me!"

Hyunjae ran out of the house, his legs making quick and long strides as he ran to his parked car down the block. His newfound adrenaline made him think about what he was sacrificing to be with you. Was leaving the party and betraying his friends worth spending even a second with you? What if you were asking him to drive you and your boyfriend somewhere? Could his heart even deal with being used like that?

But as much as Hyunjae hated it, he knew he was making the right choice. The self-respect he had for himself was buried six feet deep beneath the surface of the earth when it came to you. 

God, he really hoped he wasn’t hallucinating.

For a split second, Hyunjae truly debated what he was doing after getting into his car. He was already driving, but he didn’t know where to go. Luckily, it didn’t take you long to send him a text with your location, and it was a place he was familiar with. 

It was a park that he often frequented as a kid since it resided by his old neighborhood, and he was thankful he knew exactly where to go because he knew he would’ve definitely crashed the car while pulling up your location on his GPS. Hyunjae was doubtful it was the alcohol in his system making his fingers shake and his mind uneasy. He blamed you for his hysteria, one that had developed over years of endless longing. 

Luckily the drive wasn’t long thanks to the roads being mainly void of other vehicles (and maybe he did speed a few times, but he considered it justified). Before pulling into the parking lot, he spotted a lone figure curled up on a nearby bench. A small weight had been lifted off of him, relieved it was just you, and he parked aimlessly while his eyes rested on you.

You seemed unphased by his added presence, your arms unmoving as they stayed wrapped around your legs. The bench you were sitting in was facing away from the parking lot, but with his headlights illuminating the view in front of you, you certainly had to know he was there. 

In an ideal world, Hyunjae would leave his car, join you by your side, and, if he was lucky, he’d pull you into his arms and hold you close against his chest. He wanted to be there for you in whatever way he could, but he ended up being a deer in headlights, too afraid to make the wrong move and lose you again.

He sat there for a minute, watching you, and as soon as he received the confidence to reach for the handle of his door, you were up on your feet. His fingers paused midair as he traced your movements, his arm eventually falling to his side as you approach his car. 

Despite how slow his mind was working, Hyunjae knew to unlock the car right as you opened it (he would’ve died out of embarrassment if he had forgotten), and neither of you greeted the other.

Without any explanation from you, Hyunjae refrained from staring at you like he normally would, but your outfit made it incredibly difficult. It wasn’t much, just an oversized long-sleeved shirt that reached your thighs, but it was far from the usual clothes he’d seen you wear, like jeans and a nice-fitting blouse. For a moment, he believed you had no pants on, but then he knocked some sense into himself, realizing that you were probably wearing shorts that were hidden.

While Hyunjae attempted to keep his composure and respect your boundaries, you were eyeing him shamelessly, once again analyzing every detail about him. Beads of sweat pooled up on the back of his neck, and his hair was straightened yet fuzzy. As your eyes trailed downwards, you noticed how the mesh hugged his biceps, catching every crease that defined his muscles. He was quiet, his index finger resting against his lips. 

Where did he even come from?

And why was he so quick to listen?

You held back your tongue from dumping out your thoughts, knowing your questions would end up unanswered like before. Your body instinctively rested against the divot between the car door and your seat, keeping your distance from Hyunjae. He was meant to be a stranger, perhaps someone you loathed, yet there was an odd comfort that encased you from him just sharing the same air as you.

You cleared your throat, turning your head to look away when he flinched and snapped his gaze towards you.

“Drive.”

Your demand was no louder than a whisper, but Hyunjae picked it up effortlessly and was already backing out.

“Where to?”

“Anywhere.” Hyunjae raised a brow at your answer, and you buried yourself further into his seat, directing your gaze out the door. “Just-...anywhere, Jae.”

The nickname had his throat tightening and his chest leaping, nodding in your direction as he drove on autopilot. With no destination in mind, he strolled through familiar roads, his fingers tapping against the wheel. 

You stayed silent, creating a tension that was unbearably thick, yet none of you felt the need to leave; neither of you wanted to leave the other, even if it meant having to deal with the looming elephant in the room (or in this case, Hyunjae’s car).

After spotting the recreational center from afar and its empty parking lot, he instinctively pulled in. There wasn’t a proper explanation for why he decided it’d make a great destination, especially when it was the place that created a rift in your relationship with him, but it felt right.

It was empty, open, and serene—a perfect place to stay as the moon shined.

Hyunjae stepped out of the car after parking in the middle of it, and when you didn’t follow, he moved to your side and opened the door. He was hesitant but took the risk of offering his hand to you, a warm, nervous smile on his face. He wanted you to know he was there to listen, to be there for you, because, Lord, he would hand you the world if he could.

“I’m not in the mood for walking,” you mumbled, but Hyunjae shook his head.

“We’re not going to walk, I promise.”

Your eyes flickered up to his briefly, skeptical of what he had planned, but ultimately caved. You ignored his hand, and he pulled it back with regret. When you stood there, your eyes on the sky, he closed the door behind you and guided you to the hood of his car.

Without a second thought, he sat on top of it and gestured for you to do the same.

“I sit here all the time. Helps me think.” He leaned back against his windshield, his hands holding the back of his head as he kept his eyes on the sky. When you didn’t move, he started to feel stupid, wondering if you two were better off in the car, but then you joined him. 

You copied his position, staring upwards as your hands rested over your abdomen. 

Hyunjae opted to keep to himself, deciding that he didn’t want to make this worse for the two of you. Instead, he fixated his thoughts on the stars in the sky.

There were only a few, but it was a rare sight due to the constant air pollution in your city, so he considered it a miracle. You, on the other hand, were spacing out in thought, and Hyunjae could tell through his occasional peeks. Without much control, his eyes started tracing down your arms. They then landed on where the hem of your shirt rested, now looking at your bare thighs.

Feeling as if he just reverted back to being the shyest virgin in the country, he gulped and immediately looked elsewhere, trying to get you off his mind despite you being right next to him. His racing heart was all that he could hear, and now he wondered if you could hear it too—if you knew how much you affected him.

And your voice broke the silence.

“How long have you known?”

Okay, maybe his brain did fall out of his skull because Hyunjae had no idea what you were talking about. He turned his head and caught how you stared up at the sky. Your eyes were glossy, holding the reflections of the whole galaxy within them. They sparkled, and for a beat, Hyunjae had forgotten your question, too infatuated with your beauty. 

His silence resulted in you turning your head, gaze meeting his, and that was when he noticed the tears.

“About Jiwoong and Eunseo.”

Your light, your flames, his burning desire; all were gone in a flash.

Your voice was delicate, and Hyunjae knew that with one move, he could break you.

Directing his gaze heavenward, Hyunjae sighed and brought his arms down to rest over his chest. Somehow he was able to feel all the pain you were experiencing, his heart twisting while his stomach churned and sloshed around in his body. He thought about how to respond as he chewed on the inside of his lip, questioning if he should answer at all to avoid hurting you.

But you asked, and as always, Hyunjae delivered.

“I don’t think I ever really knew until last week,” he explained, “but I could always tell.” Suddenly, the fight from a week ago had resurrected, and Hyunjae was forced to relive it all.

The hallways were empty when Hyunjae left the broadcasting room, a backpack strap slung over his shoulder while the other dangled behind him. He was in the middle of scrolling through his emails when he picked up on the sound of Jiwoong’s voice around the corner. 

His footsteps halted, and Hyunjae caught Jiwoong’s fatal words.

“How does tomorrow sound?”

Eunseo’s squeals followed after, and Hyunjae stood motionless.

At first, Hyunjae had no thoughts circulating in his brain, but after hearing their lips collide, he started coming up with solutions, such as interrupting or taking a video to send to you. Unfortunately, before he could act on either of them, he heard footsteps dashing off, practically skipping, as the two bidded one another goodbye. 

Hyunjae couldn’t pinpoint the reasoning behind his upcoming actions, but he knew how to describe how he felt. 

Anger was the first and only emotion to surge up within him, his fingers instinctively balling up into fists. His muscles had tightened while a forest fire ran rampant through his veins, causing his blood to boil. 

Then with quick strides, Hyunjae shoved his phone away and made a sharp turn around the corner, tossing his backpack on the ground after spotting Jiwoong against the lockers. The latter had a dazed look on his face, his lips curled into a smirk as he typed away on his phone, but that was changed once he looked up at the sound of Hyunjae’s backpack crashing against the ground in front of him.

There wasn’t a second in between Jiwoong’s face of surprise and Hyunjae’s arm being raised, and before Jiwoong could react, Hyunjae’s fist had slammed into his jaw. 

It was a blur from there, but Hyunjae knew he had won even after authorities dragged him off Jiwoong’s body. He had received a few jabs in return, but it was nothing compared to the black eye Hyunjae gave him.

The fact that Jiwoong managed to cover it up with makeup the day after was a miracle, and no one in the school knew about the fight since it happened after school. Hyunjae wanted it to stay that way, but a selfish, cruel part of him wished that everyone knew how sick your boyfriend was.

Well, now he was unsure if he was still your boyfriend. 

Hyunjae turned his head back towards you, his cheek meeting the cold metal of his car.

You pursed your lips at his response and nodded slowly. If it were any other day, you wouldn’t have believed him. There was no universe where you’d choose to listen to Hyunjae over Jiwoong, but after a week of investigating and getting your head out of your ass, you found out on your own terms, and all the pieces made sense.

“I didn’t mean to.”

Hyunjae’s voice jerked you out of your thoughts, and as you adjusted to look back at him, you were surprised to still find him staring at you.

“I’m not a violent person, Y/N,” he whispered, an enduring hope lingering in his eyes. He wanted you to believe him, and for once, you did; you truly understood the man you hated most.

“I know, Jae.”

Hyunjae eased at your words, and the two of you fell back into a more comfortable yet aching silence. His fingers drummed against his abdomen, and after a while, he got sick of looking at the same four stars, so he closed his eyes, focusing on enjoying the light breeze instead. His heart was still racing, but it was less alarming. Regardless, he hated knowing that he potentially contributed to how much you were hurting right now.

Maybe if he had done something to prevent it earlier, whether it be telling you as soon as he found out or keeping completely out of your business so you could live in bliss, or, if he wasn’t so scared, he could’ve asked you to be his far before Jiwoong had. Maybe it wouldn’t have changed much, but Hyunjae would never know since he never tried, and now he was going to beat himself over it because now you’re devastated over losing your boyfriend and it was potentially his faul—

You laughed.

Hyunjae snapped his head towards you, his brows raised at your sudden change in mood—but it wasn’t the type of laugh he expected. Your laugh was one filled with pain, and he watched you shake your head, trying to refuse the tears that were rapidly welling up in your eyes once more. You sniffed and wiped the tears away with the back of your hand, choosing to look in the opposite direction because the last thing you wanted was for Hyunjae to see you vulnerable.

“It’s stupid,” you murmured. “This entire thing is stupid. I’m so fucking dumb.”

His lips parted to interject, to tell you that you were, in fact, ‘not dumb,’ but he clamped his mouth shut, knowing that his words probably wouldn’t help. From what he’d learned in the past, you liked it least when he tried telling you otherwise, no matter the situation. 

“I should’ve known. I did know. The whole world knew. Even you knew, but it makes me think, was Eunseo just flocking around, flaunting to everyone that she had a crush on my boyfriend and managed to win him over? I just—I…I don’t know-...” You paused to catch your breath, beginning to choke on your tears as your chest shook, “I don’t know what I did wrong, you know?”

You shut your eyes, allowing the pain to engulf you. You knew fully well that your punishment was to deal with the pain, but you felt like you didn’t deserve it—that you deserved none of this. Why was this a penalty for being in love?

It was humiliating having everyone witness the reality you shielded from yourself, choosing hope and love over the truth. 

“I just never felt more stupid in my life, and I feel even more stupid knowing that I still love him.”

Hyunjae sucked in his lips, gnawing on them as he bit back all his feelings, from his brain shredding to his heart weeping.

“I love him so much that I would let him do it to me all over again because I keep thinking he’d be better. I know he can be better, so why-...It’s just- Why do I do this to myself?”

Tears cascaded down your cheeks, each one leaving behind a trail for others to fall. They started pouring out of you rapidly, soon sobbing at the heart-wrenching pain of being betrayed by everyone in your life, Hyunjae included, because why, out of everyone, was he here for you when he should be the last person who cared?

You always wanted Hyunjae to be the antagonist of your life story, to have him as your biggest enemy and threat, so why was everyone else but him hurting you? Why was the villain of your fantasy taking the role of your knight in shining armor?

And yet, as much as it pained Hyunjae to process all your emotions, his mind wasn’t running correctly; he had you alone for the first time in months. He wanted nothing more than to pull you in his arms and whisper words of comfort in your ears, knowing you deserved it more than anyone, but he also wanted to shake you awake and slap you out of your misery, praying that you’d forget about Jiwoong; that right now, you being vulnerable was his chance to swoop in, to set whatever you wanted him to into flames, as long as if it meant you’d end up okay. 

You sat up because if you lied down any longer, you would’ve started drowning in your own tears. Your sleeves were soaked, and he sat up alongside you, figuring that he should do something about it.

Hyunjae got back onto his feet and stood in front of you. He barely knew what he was doing, but that didn’t stop him from replacing your sleeves with his cold, clammy hands over your cheeks. There wasn’t a time that Hyunjae could recall where he had been this gentle with someone, and when you didn’t push him away, he tilted your head up to look at him.

Even with tears running down your cheeks, you looked angelic as ever. 

Each droplet mirrored a star from the sky, and your eyes sparkled as they stayed locked on his.

“Take me,” you whispered, and Hyunjae’s whole world stopped. 

“...What?” Hyunjae had only intended to wipe your tears away with the pads of his hands, perhaps whisper something along the lines of him being here for you for the night (and the rest of his life, let’s be honest), yet your first words were—no, he had to have been hallucinating.

Your hands trembled as they reached for his wrist, and although you were severely broken, the grip your fingers created was firm.

“Please.”

Like a moth to a flame, Hyunjae admired how pretty you looked, your lips plump and eyes wide, and he wanted nothing more than to take you into his backseat and treat you the way he’d always wanted to, especially after hearing your pleas, but he knew better. You both knew better. 

“What exactly are you implying?” he asked, feeling like you had just inhaled all his oxygen and left him breathless. 

You released his wrist and opted to hold onto his sleeve, tugging on it as you tried to get him to understand you.

“I want it to hurt, Jaehyun.”

Your tears were gone, and there was a hint of dominance in your tone that would’ve had him dropped to his knees in front of you. You were also one of the very few who resorted to calling him Jae, and now his actual name. He favored Hyunjae, but after hearing ‘Jaehyun’ from your lips, his preference had completely made a turnaround. 

But Hyunjae worked to collect his thoughts, fully aware that this was wrong and he’d have to be the bigger person here. As much as he hated himself for giving up the perfect opportunity to have the girl of his dreams, he couldn’t ignore the large concern over your current mental state.

“You’re not thinking straight, Y/N,” he reasoned softly, his fingers reaching up to brush your hair out of your face, and for a second, Hyunjae swore he felt the alcohol kicking in—or perhaps it was you instead. The thought of being able to have you right now, to touch you and press his hands over your skin, to have you as his for just this night, was so intoxicating that he was seconds away from foaming at the mouth.

“I don’t need to think straight. I don’t want to think at all.”

Everything felt hotter and tighter, but he kept his composure, though with his eyes dropping to your begging lips and then your delicate fingers, he knew he was beginning to lose whatever was left of his sanity. 

But he also knew you were using him; you had to be. There was no other explanation. It was only minutes ago when you professed how you continued to feel about Jiwoong—that your heart still belonged to him, and Hyunjae was allowed nowhere near it. He was your backup, your second option, yet that happened to be better than nothing, right?

Especially when he could have you right here, right now. 

“You’re using me.”

Your expression didn’t falter.

“Then say no. Make us go back into your car and drive me home.” Your hand dropped from holding onto his sleeve but that was so you could wrap your arms around his neck, slowly bringing yourself closer to him. His cheeks were flushed as his mind flooded with possibilities of what could happen. Never had you ever wanted him, and he’d been dreaming of a moment like this for years. Your tear-stained cheeks, your pouty red lips—he wanted all of you.

“But you won’t,” you whispered, your breath hitting his skin. Your eyes landed on his lips, now craving him as much as he craved you. You needed a release, an outlet, to justify Jiwoong being better than Hyunjae. Hyunjae was worse in every way possible, and you wanted him to prove that to you. “You’d do anything I’d say, wouldn’t you?”

“What makes you say that?” Little did you know Hyunjae was crumbling inside, completely melting as his fingers grew weak at the idea of your lips on his. His hands, although wary, traveled to your waist, feeling your curves before trailing his hands down to your hips to grip them.

“You love me, don’t you?”

His heart stuttered, all words caught up in his throat, but he knew there was no defending himself—not when he was practically drooling at every move you made; he was hyperaware of the hand playing with the hair on his nape, the way your lips nearly hovered over his, and how your tears glistened under the moonlight.

His entire existence was confirmation of your words, and you knew it.

“You’d do anything for me, Jae. What’s stopping you now?”

There was a stillness as you two stared at one another. He swallowed and pulled slightly back.

He knew better.

“You don’t want me.” He was brokenhearted, a part of him understanding that you’d never be his, yet he wanted you in so many ways, wishing to have your mewls fill his ears and the smell of sex staining his clothes. The bulge in his pants was forming and pressing up against the tight confinement, making him groan. 

He dropped his head downwards, his forehead leaning to rest against yours, as he closed his eyes and did his best to regulate his breathing—repeating in his head and out loud, again.

He knew better.

“You’re using me.”

You both knew better.

Yet with your lips ghosting his and your eyes half-hooded, you were prepared to give into the dark side.

“And I say take advantage of it.”

Hyunjae dived and pressed his lips onto yours, hunger driving his every movement. There was no stopping when he felt your lips curling up into a grin, his hands shifting to wrap around your torso to drag you closer. His heart burst at how perfectly his lips molded with yours, and it seemed as if there was fire shooting up into the sky and exploding—they weren’t fireworks, and the explosion was far bigger and more dangerous. It lit the entirety of the sky, the moon and stars included, into flames, a desire unlike any other.

Your left hand pressed firm against the back of his neck while the other traveled through his hair. Meanwhile, his hands had snuck beneath your shirt and felt for your lower back. Heavy breaths left the two of you as desperation crept through your veins, dictating your every movement. 

The cold touch from his hands ignited your nervous system, every sense activated and overstimulated by Hyunjae as you released a breathy moan into his mouth.

You didn’t want him, but fuck, you needed him.

When you would pull back, his lips would chase yours, and you two fell into an endless cycle. He couldn’t even fathom how you were pulling away for air when you were his oxygen. Maybe you weren’t oxygen itself, but the fumes you emitted had already replaced his need for air, deluding him into believing that you were what he needed to stay alive.

You were suffocating, toxic, and destructive, and he wanted more. 

After retracting from the kiss for the nth time, you turned your head to hold Hyunjae back from continuing. You both were panting, your cunt soaking, and he stared into your eyes like a puppy awaiting their next direction.

“Good boy,” you praised, and he laughed lowly and sheepishly, dropping his head as he processed what happened and the idea of it being potentially over. 

“You’re lethal,” he breathed out.

“And you’re pitiful,” you spat. There was a playful grin on your lips, but those words ignited something within Hyunjae. He raised his head and cocked a brow at you, questioning your genuinity. 

Just minutes ago you were crying over a guy that treated you terribly, and yet here you thought you had the authority to call him weak.

Perhaps he was; he was falling deeper into your pitless trap, enticed with every movement of yours, but he knew for a fact you weren’t any better than him.

You both were sick in the head for falling for people that treated the other like shit, yet your drive, your fuel, to win over the hearts of the people you loved was so strong, and it made you two unstoppable. 

Hyunjae would punch Jiwoong all over again if he could. 

Without a second thought, Hyunjae ducked his head down and ruthlessly attached his lips to your neck, eliciting a gasp from you. He kissed your skin fervently, his fingers teasing the rim of your shorts, and your hands shifted to hold onto his shoulders for support. You found yourself tossing your head back, providing him more room to do as he pleased, that if Jiwoong were to see you with marks on your neck, then maybe he’d want you back. 

“Bold of you to call me pitiful,” he grumbled, sucking onto your neck until a blot of purple began to form.

“But it’s true, no?”

“You’re just as bad, Y/N.” He licked a stripe up your neck and over the mark, and the sensation made you cringe, disgust itching at your skin due to being covered in his saliva, but you wanted more of it. You wanted Hyunjae to treat you like you were nothing, to treat you worse than Jiwoong ever had, so you could direct your blame over to Hyunjae instead of your unknowing boyfriend.

You turned your head and slotted your lips with his again, already addicted to how perfect they were for you. Hyunjae knew the exact way to kiss you, to keep you on your toes, as your slick pooled up in your underwear at the mere thought of Hyunjae touching you.

The kiss was eager, a fight for control, and when Hyunjae didn’t surrender, you raised your knee, forcing your thigh to brush up against his crotch.

He gasped at the sensation and pulled away, bangs hanging over his eyes as he looked down at the sight. You teased him by keeping your touches gentle, but you made sure to keep your leg moving. Nothing intrigued you more than seeing Hyunjae beg or rut against your thigh, further proof of how pathetic he was for you. You gained a sense of ego knowing that he could have any girl in the world, that he has had every girl, and yet he would always come back to you. Now that you had him, it would be harder for him to return to a life without you under him, moaning his name.

You wanted to be his downfall. 

Your nails latched onto the mesh, taking note of how easy it would be to rip the material, before pressing your thigh firmly up against his dick, making him jerk.

“You’re-...oh my god, Y/N,” he gasped, breathless. His eyes meet your devious ones, how you were basically Satan himself, and somehow, someway, he wouldn’t ask for anything different. “You’re playing a losing…a losing- game.”

“What more do I have left to lose?” There was some truth in your words as vulnerability struck you. Your leg then lowered as you regained a slight sense of reality, realizing that you were forcing Hyunjae into being your selfish source of relief. You hated Hyunjae, sure, but you knew this was the last thing he deserved—to use him when he’d been nothing but accommodating to you.

And your sick and twisted plan was that after this encounter, you’d leave him to rot.

Hyunjae didn’t deserve that at all. 

But Hyunjae was already too far gone, too intoxicated, to even consider the repercussions of how he’d end up after this. The loss of contact with his crotch was what had him picking you up from his car, the tips of his fingers digging into your thighs, as he led you to the backseat. 

Your eyes widened, your senses fully back, but you made him like this, and you were going to pay for it. Although scared for about what’s to come, the anticipation had you drooling, your lips pressing fierce kisses onto his skin while he opened the door with you in his arms.

He laid you down gently and crawled over you, keeping you trapped between his arms.

“This is what you wanted, right? For me to tear you apart until you can run back to Jiwoong and justify how poorly he treats you?” 

Your brows bunched up at his words, your legs getting antsy being under him. There was no answering him, not when Hyunjae already knew how you were going to respond.

He brought one of his hands into your shorts and made the aggravating decision to slide his fingers over your underwear, depriving you of contact with his fingers.

Yet even with your underwear being a divider, he found your clit with ease and immediately started rubbing circles into the bud, making you buck your hips with a whine. The friction of the cloth was something you were unfamiliar with, and lord did it mess with you. 

“You want me to treat you how he sees you? Worthless and undeserving of respect?” He flicked your clit and kissed your jaw. “If that’s what you want, that’s exactly what my princess is going to get.”

“Fuck,” you moaned, using your hands to push onto his shoulders and force him down. The drive to ride his tongue was strong, and if he kept teasing you, you would have lost it.

“I know you inside and out, Y/N. I know you better than him, and this is how you treat me.” He sucked in a cheek but ultimately decided to comply with what you wanted. He pulled off your shorts yet left your underwear on, and his brows raised. He wasn’t sure how his fingers had missed the texture of lace, but what you were wearing was certainly lingerie.

You looked down to see why he stopped, and when you realized why he froze, heat rose to your cheeks.

“I wanted to feel pretty,” you whispered, shutting your eyes after turning your head. It was embarrassing, now that you thought about it, but Hyunjae’s heart soared, and he wanted nothing more than for you to know how ethereal you looked.

But he shoved the feeling away, allowing his frustrations to get the better half of him. 

When he pulled off your underwear, he cooed at how your essence oozed onto the material and raised the undergarment into the air, waiting for you to look.

“Did I do this?”

His mocking tone kept you from looking, but your curiosity got the best of you. You were met with the sight of a large wet, dark patch on your underwear, biting down on your lip as you looked at him with wide eyes. If you thought about it, you couldn’t remember the last time you felt like this, or if there ever had been a time when you craved someone this badly. 

He tossed it to the side and his hands massaged your thighs, keeping them spread open so he got a proper view of your core on display for him. The sight truly stunned him, reminding him that this was you he fantasized about and replicated with other girls—no one else.

“Do you normally take this long?” you rasped, tossing your head back against the seat, and Hyunjae rolled his eyes.

“I do you a favor, and this is how you treat me.”

“A favor is a stretch—”

Hyunjae plunged two fingers into your mouth, having them press firmly down against your tongue. He latched onto your jaw and pulled your head forward and up towards him, having your eyes meet his.

“Remind me, Y/N, who was begging for this?”

He dropped your head back down against the seat before you could even respond and used whatever saliva accumulated in your mouth as temporary lube, figuring that your slick would help him with stretching you out. You grunted at the impact, feeling helpless, as Hyunjae finally inserted his fingers inside of you. 

Hyunjae’s fingers were enough to have your eyes rolling, but it was the ring that he wore that stimulated you the most. You weren’t aware that he was even wearing one, yet the cold band against your raging wet heat made you whimper and desperately grasp for his hair.

“Jaehyun, please,” you begged. 

He chuckled and kept his movements slow, forcing you to fuck yourself onto his fingers weakly. When you did, he was in awe at how stunning you looked, how you seemed to be in your own world, and how you were enjoying him. By curling his fingers, a moan was pulled from your throat, making your eyes open as you looked at him. You continued to pool around his fingers, your voice weakly begging for so much more than his fingers and the cold air that brushed against your skin. 

Never had you felt more vulnerable, but Hyunjae never once made you feel like you were doing something wrong, making you cling desperately to him. You forced his face down into your crotch and jerked at the feeling of his nose brushing up against your clit.

“Shameless, aren’t you?” he commented, laughing lowly, but you were too out of it to care. 

“Shut the-...F-fuck, oh my god.”

Your whines had gotten more incessant the more useless he became, his fingers now completely stilled inside of you as he watched you roll your hips with a cheeky grin. He wanted to drag this out for as long as possible, knowing fully well that he could last all night. 

When he took out his fingers, you were yanked out of your bliss and nearly begged for him to put them back in, but before you could get a word out, he had replaced his digits with his tongue. Your slick was dripping onto his lips, and as he dragged his wet muscle up and down your folds, he made sure to collect a small puddle of you onto his tongue to eventually swallow, wanting to savor you. 

“Oh-...Oh my god, Jae—” Your orgasm was approaching, unsure of how it was here so soon, but you recognized the signs from the coil in your chest tightening to losing every sensation to the man beneath you. You rocked your hips continuously onto his tongue, and his thumb attached to your clit, making you see stars with how rapid his movements were. 

He pulled his face back and forced his fingers back into you, and the final curl was what made you reach your peak, your hips in the air as you cried out his name. 

As you came down from your high, you caught a glance of the way Hyunjae was looking at you; to him, you were otherworldly, and it was a sight he’d never forget. He wondered if Jiwoong ever saw you like this, if he ever made you feel this way, and suddenly his admiration had soured and contoured to something of darkness, rid of any empathy as he now looked at you with some form of disgust. 

“All this for me, and you still have the fucking audacity to choose him.” 

The mention of Jiwoong had your eyes wide open, tears reappearing at the mention and while being in your most vulnerable state. Your legs shook from the aftermath, feeling too weak to continue, yet Hyunjae seemed to have other plans.

Instead of shoving his fingers back into either of your mouths, he hovered over you and made sure you saw the way he dragged his fingers around your abdomen, drawing aimlessly over your skin with your essence before dragging a hand up to your breasts, massaging one of them as his other hand rested by your waist.

“Tell me, Y/N, did you buy this for him and never got to use it? That’s why you’re wearing it now with me? Am I your sloppy seconds?”

There was a slight growl under his tone, and while you shook your head subconsciously, he worked to remove your shirt, wanting a better look at your bra, before being met with a necklace you had been hiding; one with Jiwoong’s name.

And Hyunjae took no time breaking it from your neck.

Your jaw dropped, and you snapped out of your daze by sitting straight up, yet as you were about to yell at him for breaking your necklace, he shoved three fingers back into your pussy, shutting you up by having you moan at the intrusion. 

“It looked cheap, anyway,” he muttered, forcing his mouth against yours momentarily to nip on your lower lip, tugging on it so your focus remained on him. 

“That was—he’s mine,” you forced out, gasping at every thrust he made with his fingers, your sweet spot being abused as your hands latched onto his shoulders. You made sure your nails dug into his skin, wanting it to hurt, before pulling onto the mesh, wishing for it to tear. 

“He’s not yours, princess. Tell me, how can you say that when his dick has been up other girls?” With his free hand, he grabbed your face and made sure you were staring straight at him before shoving it to the side. 

“You need to fucking wake up and realize that you can dream all you want about how he’d react if he saw you hopping on my dick, but guess what? He wouldn’t care.” Hyunjae pulled out his fingers and left you alone in the backseat. 

You sat there, a wreck and vulnerable, as you tried to catch your breath. You lay back on your forearms, curious eyes following his every movement.

“There’s a reason he hasn’t left you yet,” Hyunjae explained, opening the front door to his car to grab a condom and his phone. He tucked both into his back pocket before returning to you, bringing your lips to his before continuing to talk within the kiss.

“He’s stringing you along so you can boost his ego. He knows you will always be there for him, and you allow him to use you like that?” 

You wrapped your fingers around Hyunjae’s neck, squeezing it before pushing it away to keep your distance, your frustration starting to grow.

“I’m beginning to think you’re all bark and no bite, Jaehyun,” you muttered, and with whatever strength you had left, you pushed him against the seat and got into his lap. Without hesitation, you started rocking your hips over his clothed dick, hoping your slick would seep in so he could feel you.

He hissed but allowed you to do as you pleased, his grip tight on your hips.

“I-...I think…if you asked me, you’re the one who’s projecting. I’m the one in a relationship, and you’re just a side piece.”

The speed of your hips increased, and Hyunjae felt ecstasy on the tip of his tongue, the confinements of his pants physically paining him the more you continued.

“You’re jealous, Jae. Just admit it.”

You pulled at his hair, loving the absolute control you had over him at that moment, but in one languid motion, Hyunjae managed to push you back down, this time with your stomach against the seats. You could feel your bodily fluids sticking to the nylon, and with how hard Hyunjae was pressing down into you, you were barely given a chance to move. 

With one hand on your lower back, he kept you still as he took out both his phone and condom, making sure to place both on top of your bare skin.

“What’s there to be jealous of when you’re here under me? You want to be fucked stupid? Fine. Don’t fucking complain when you want me to be the villain.” You lurched at his words, refusing to let him win, but you were completely unable to do much damage as Hyunjae kicked off his pants and boxers while still keeping his weight on you.

He then picked up his phone and pulled up the camera, making sure to take a photo of you in his car before clicking record and tossing the phone onto the ground, hoping it was close enough to pick up on your sweet noises. 

“Make sure to be loud for me, yeah? I’m sure Jiwoong would love it if I sent that video to him.”

“You wouldn’t fucking dare,” you bit back, your hand reaching out in an attempt to grab the device, but Hyunjae was quicker to grab your wrist, pinning it behind your back. 

“I wouldn’t because I know how to appreciate what’s mine.” Hyunjae released his hold on you to roll on the condom, giving you the opportunity to move and take his phone as you pleased. To your dismay, there was no more effort left within you, only an ache to feel Hyunjae inside you. 

“He appreciates me,” you mumbled, trying to convince yourself otherwise as you waited.

“Does he record you? Jerk off to your moans every night? Because I would, Y/N, just for you.” His voice was now by your ear, and when you turned your head to look at him, he pulled you into another hungry kiss, his dick now grazing against your hole. 

“You’re fucking insane,” you bit back into the kiss, and he grinned against your lips, guiding his dick into you as he spoke.

“Psychotic, just for my princess.”

Venom laced his voice, dripping menacingly, and the insertion of his tip had you grasping for something in front of you, anything, and it was only then that you were able to process how thick his cock was.

“Can you take it?” he asked, his voice slightly softer than before. When you gave him a curt nod, he continued pushing in further. Maybe lube should’ve been an option, but you were so wet for him that it didn’t matter, knowing that the stretch probably would have hurt regardless. 

“Fuck, fuck—he really doesn’t know what he’s missing,” Hyunjae gasped, his head resting against the back of yours. It was better than anything he’d dreamed of, better than any girl he imagined, because it was you, and your body was made for him.

“When was the last time he fucked you?” He was fully inside of you now, and when you didn’t answer, he decided to take it as a sign to move. With a firm grip on your waist, he pulled out just to slam back in, making you yell as you clawed at the seat, wishing there was something to bite on as you endured the pain that was quick to morph into pleasure. 

Every glide pushed you further into the car, your forearms occasionally hitting the door, as his hips moved vigorously, working up to a pace that had you moaning without pause. Tears were flowing down your cheeks at the overwhelming pleasure of being manhandled—of being Hyunjae’s rag doll when he was meant to be yours, and your body seized up, being worked up to your orgasm once more with how precise each thrust seemed to be. 

He adjusted to raise one of your legs to his hip, giving him a new angle to pound into you as he worships you with his dick, and you shook out of pleasure, whining as you saw white and reached your second orgasm for the night. You pulsated around his cock, strangled moans ripping from your throat as tears mixed with your drool by your chin.

And Hyunjae showed no signs of stopping.

He made sure to press your face down against the seats, wanting every liquid to fall and stain his car, giving him something to remember you by.

Oh, and there was the recording too.

While kneeling inside of the cramped car, he slowed his movements and inclined his torso towards you. In one swift motion, he wrapped his arm around your neck and pulled you up, locking you inside his elbow as he forced you to look into your reflection in the car window.

“Look at you, the school’s favorite slut. What happens if the recording drops? The whole school would know you’re mine, wouldn’t they?” He pressed his chest against your back, the mesh rubbing against your skin as his lips remained near your ear, forcing you to listen to every word.

You limped against him, your flames completely burnt out, and your fingers tugged onto the mesh around his arm, successfully ripping it after some time, but Hyunjae seemed unphased. In fact, it turned him on even more knowing that he had you locked in, that you were his.

“Look at your pretty cunt taking me in so well. It was so wet for me, wasn’t it? It still is. And guess what? You’re in my car. You belong to me, and my good girl is only now just finding out about it, isn’t she?” 

“I-I’m…I’m not-...not yours,” you retaliated, creating red angry marks into his skin with your nails as you endured being used, stifling your moans as you looked at how wrecked you were, how bare you seemed to be compared to Hyunjae. You were much more of a mess, from your hair to the bruises on your neck. Your pussy kept tightening up around his dick, convulsing occasionally with every hit toward your g-spot, and you held onto Hyunjae each time. 

Your head drooped down, thinking about how your heart ached for Jiwoong, yet the rest of your body was meant for Hyunjae.

“Whose fucking dick is inside of you right now?” He scoffed and pulled on your hair, forcing your head back up so he could directly speak into your ear. “Wake up, Y/N,��� he demanded. “You’re mine.”

He dropped you back onto the seat like you were nothing, leaving you completely helpless, your throat void of any words as your eyes closed and met the back of your skull, too fucked out to communicate. You tried reaching for the door handle, just something to hold onto, yet you couldn’t.

“You tell me I’m pitiful, that I’m basically delusional when you’re going to be the reason my car will smell like sex for weeks.”

Your face was forced back into the puddle of liquid you created earlier, being shifted back and forth against the seat as if you were made for his dick and not vice versa.

“It’s crazy how pathetic you are, how willing you are to break yourself down in front of everyone just to have him. That-...fuck…that you’re so convinced he wants you and you two are soulmates.” He dragged his fingers through your hair and grabbed your roots. “You called me, you wanted me, and I have you right now, moaning my name, and you have nothing.”

Something about his words kept bringing out your orgasms, each thrust adding to the pleasure immensely. You didn’t know how much you could handle—afraid you may pass out from how much he was using you, from his tight grip around you to his dick hitting inside of you mercilessly.

Hyunjae whispering ‘I won, Y/N’ was what had you losing it, your high this time ending up stronger than the rest. You were fully crying now, and yet he continued as if you were nothing.

He peppered your shoulder with kisses and had the slight decency to slow his pace, but he also took note of your sobs.

“Don’t tell me you still want him,” he began rambling, his lips still on your shoulder. “Don’t tell me after this that your heart still belongs to him, because if that were the case, I’d make you call him right now. Say you wish it was him instead of me, and that he’s the love of your life while you’re stuffed with my dick. You’d like that, wouldn’t you?”

You could no longer think, and what you hated most was how reactive your body was—how you were just able to come for the third time, but Hyunjae’s dick solely being inside you snapped some other straw you weren’t aware you had, finding that your last high was incoming. 

Hyunjae had picked up the pace by then, and by knowing your body incredibly well, he reached down to your sensitive clit to relieve you. You both knew your fourth was arriving, and you held on tight to his arm.

“J-Jaehy- hyun, I’m—”

“Mine.”

You cried out, your entire body shaking, and Hyunjae pulled out, immediately releasing onto your back with a guttural moan after yanking off the condom. He was forced to catch his breath, watching you float in and out of consciousness.

Your eyes were closed, struggling to breathe through your sobs, and Hyunjae consoled you with a kiss on the back of your shoulder. 

“You’re mine, Y/N, whether you like it or not.”

He then pressed a kiss to your cheek before leaving to grab paper towels from his trunk. You were heaving, still shaking, and left alone as a mess in his backseat, yet with him gone, you felt even more useless, wanting him back by your side instantly. You weakly cried out for him, your nails dragging against the seat in hopes of being in his arms soon, and maybe he was right.

Maybe you were his.

OUR INFERNO [ M.LIST | TWO ]

NAVIGATION — THE BOYZ

© https://hcuyk.tumblr.com/

#OUR INFERNO | lee hyunjae #deoboyznet #hyunjae #the boyz #tbz series #hyunjae smut #hyunjae fluff #hyunjae angst #hyunjae x reader #the boyz imagine #the boyz fanfiction #the boyz scenario #lee sangyeon #jacob bae #kim younghoon #lee hyunjae #lee juyeon #kevin moon #choi chanhee #ji changmin #ju haknyeon #kim sunwoo #eric sohn #the boyz smut #tbz hard hours #tbz smut

[winterchimez]

Read Your Mind | Lee Hyunjae

SUMMARY: both you and Hyunjae had a mutual agreement to begin this whole friends-with-benefits relationship from the start, but now his contradicting actions and behaviour make you question what you both truly are at this point.

PAIRING: fwb Hyunjae x f!reader

GENRE: angst, suggestive

WARNINGS: kissing, making-out, arguments, unrequited love (like the first ⅔ of the fic, but there's a happy ending folks 🥹), mentions of s*x

WORD COUNT: 3,661

A/N: i've been jamming to sabrina carpenter's read your mind lately, hence this fic was born! special shout-out to my fellow sabrina enthusiast @heemingyu for hyping me up throughout the process & reading it through for me as well 😭🫶🏻

update!! this is now part of emails i can't send fwd: series (collab with @heemingyu) ✨

You slammed your laptop down shut as soon as you saw that the clock on the wall struck at half-two. Not wasting any time, you quickly packed all your belongings into your backpack and left the lecture hall immediately. 

Oh, how you’ve always dreaded long lectures like today, which lasted for approximately three hours since your lecturer insisted on finishing up the modulus before letting you off for the long weekend ahead. 

As you made your way out of the hall, you were immediately joined by your group of friends, who were quickly catching up with you, telling you how there’s this new Korean BBQ restaurant in town and how you guys must try it since there’s a limited promotion going on there. It was a Friday night—of course, you had to agree. 

That was until your phone from your back pocket buzzed. 

You took out your mobile and quickly scanned through the notification that just popped up on your screen. 

🎁: Hey, meet me at my place tonight at 8pm? The usual.

A long exasperated sigh left your lips as soon as you saw that message since you knew what it exactly meant.

And how you have been doing it constantly for the past 6 months without anyone besides you two knowing about this whole deal. 

Your friends clearly noticed how quickly your facial expressions shifted and began asking if something was the matter. As usual, you brushed them off and told them how your family issues had come up again and that you wouldn’t be able to join them for the night.

Using your usual pouting facial expression to convince your friends that you’ll definitely make it for the next one, you hope that it will indirectly tell them how you feel sorry about it and stop making them pressure you with more questions. 

Waving them goodbye, you turn your heel in the opposite direction, making your way to the destination that your so-called friend has been expecting you to be.

Closing your eyes, you took in a deep breath before you eventually mustered up the courage to head to where you had to be. 

Here we go again.

You were now on his lap, straddling his waist while his grip tightened around you. Both of you were having a steamy makeout session, lips exploring each other’s like there was no tomorrow, while both of your hands began touching one another, which increased the arousal that you both were feeling at that moment.

Finally, after a while, he gives you a little moment to have a breather while he travels down to your neck and begins leaving a trail of kisses all the way down to your collarbone. Once he got there, he began sucking it a little too hard, one that you knew would definitely leave a hickey behind, and you’ll definitely need to use your handy-dandy concealer to cover them up the next day. 

His hands begin travelling up to your chest, where he begins squeezing one of your breasts, which is where he gets an elicit moan in return, turning him on for the next move he is about to pull. 

“Can I… take your clothes off, Y/N?” 

“Go ahead, Jae.” 

The next thing that happened was that both of your clothes were scattered throughout the floor, and you were now lying in bed with Hyunjae hovering over you. Both of your lips are now reconnected, tongues intertwining with one another, leaving no room for a breather. 

Just as you thought things would get a little spicier, the male suddenly stopped in his tracks. 

“No.” 

“Hyunjae? Is everything alright?”

“No. I’m sorry, Y/N. I can’t do this anymore.” 

Hyunjae then gets up and sits on the bed, and you follow by sitting up next to him. Gently placing a hand on his shoulder, you looked at him with the look of concern and sincerity in your eyes. 

“Care to share about what’s going through your mind?” 

Hyunjae sighed deeply before furrowing his eyebrows as he stared off into the ceiling. “I’m not sure, Y/N. I know we both agreed on this from the start. But lately, I just don’t feel like this was the same as before.” 

It was true. You both began this whole friends-with-benefits situation because Hyunjae had recently broken off with his ex, and he was feeling slightly lonely. Both of you were only coursemates and nothing else. Eventually, you both got close with one another when you were assigned to be lab partners in one of the subjects within the course.

You noticed how Hyunjae wasn’t as goofy and bright as he was previously, and you decided to check up on him and asked if anything was the matter and if you could at least extend a helping hand to him. Initially, he was reluctant to tell you the truth. After a period of time, he made the deal and spat out what had been bothering him for so long.

Making it clear that he was heartbroken and needed a company, you somehow convinced him that you could do that if he desperately needed them. Though both of you had made it clear to one another that he would not envision you as his ex whenever you did the deed, he merely needed company to satisfy his sexual desires. Adding to the fact that neither of you would fall for each other. You were more than happy to do that so long as you both did not break each other’s boundaries. 

Things started out fine in the beginning, and he started to feel better and presentable at lectures, which made it seem like everything was working out fine. In return, you got to expand your knowledge on romance since you have never had a partner in the past 22 years of your life. In other words, it was kind of a win-win situation for both parties. 

However, you have begun to notice how things have changed from all of your recent makeouts with the male himself. There was this awkward tension in the air, contradicting what you both had agreed on beforehand. There are multiple times—like tonight when Hyunjae suddenly breaks off the kiss and tells you both how you guys are done for the day.

Something was bothering him, and neither of you knew what it was all about because the male himself did not understand his emotions. 

Every time this happened, he felt guilty about it and constantly apologised for everything that had happened. 

But tonight, something was different. 

“I’m sorry, Y/N. But I think I really need some time alone to myself.”

“Yeah, it’s fine. I’ll just go to bed-” 

“I’ll walk you home, at least.” 

Oh. 

This was the first time Hyunjae asked you to give him space. Usually—even during the recent not-so-good makeout sessions, he would always insist that you stay for the night, reassuring you that his flat is way safer than going back home with the dimly lit streets at night. 

But this? It was something you had least expected to happen, though you didn’t question the male as you could tell it wasn’t the right timing to do so. 

Instead, you just nodded and quickly packed away your stuff before the both of you were ready to head out towards the front door.

The entire walk back to your flat didn’t take that long—it was about a five minute walk, to be exact. But what made this whole short-distance road feel like an eternity was how neither of you spoke a word throughout the whole journey. You could tell Hyunjae wasn’t in his right mind, his face was pale. Hence, you decided to just wrap your arms around yourself and walked close by next to him, respecting the peace and silence for now. 

As you reached your flat, Hyunjae didn’t say much and rather just muttered a simple “goodnight” before he smiled weakly and turned his heel back towards the direction of his residence. 

Whatever happened tonight, you knew that something had changed between the both of your relationships. 

This went on for an entire week. Ever since that fateful day, you’ve noticed how Hyunjae slowly returned to his previous self, where he always seemed so lonely and gloomy. He was quiet for a few days, but the usual message came in, and you find yourself back at his flat two days later.

However, it ended up the same way as it did, pausing suddenly when you both got down to the climax and decided to call it quits before walking back home once again. 

The cycle then continued. He would tell you that he needed to be alone and work on his thoughts for some time before eventually typing down the usual that would keep you busy and occupied with him throughout the night. You would return to him every time, knowing how you’d be left feeling confused and unsatisfied with the entire ordeal.

Yet, your heart yearns for the man, and you’re always hoping that you’ll at least be able to ease his pain and loneliness, even in the slightest bit. 

But tonight is when you decided that enough was enough and would confront him about it. What exactly was bothering him? Or rather, if he was actually getting bored of your company.

You needed to know. 

“Hyunjae, I’m here to talk.” 

When you replied to the male with your usual messages, being the gentleman he was, Hyunjae welcomed you immediately at the front door when you arrived. The usual deal would be that the two of you would get straight down to business without having much say, to begin with. Tonight was when you decided that this would not work out, and you both have to come to terms with one another before things go straight downhill. 

He looked at you with a surprised look, where you could tell that he was definitely taken aback since you were usually the quiet one and would let the male take control of everything. A deep sigh left his mouth, and he invited you into his living room, where you both sat on the couch, distancing ever so slightly from one another. 

You hesitated for a moment before you decided that it was the right time to put together the right words to ask the male what exactly had been going through his mind for the past weeks. 

“What exactly am I to you at this point?” 

It seemed as if the male knew that the day would come when he would eventually have to face the question he had been avoiding for so long. In the beginning, he has always seen you as a good friend who would understand his point of view of where he was coming from and how he deeply appreciated the help you were willing to give him.

But lately, he has been having second thoughts and has begun questioning himself about what he truly felt about you.

Are the both of you still in this whole friends-with-benefits situation? Or even, are you both still good friends at this point? 

It took a minute or two for the male to speak up finally, and what he replied was something that had never once crossed your mind. 

“I fear that I might be crossing the line, Y/N.” 

“And why is that?”

“Honestly, I don’t even know myself.” 

This uncertainty back and forth has really started to get on your nerves, and the fact that you came here tonight to clear the air proved nothing at all. Hyunjae wasn’t sure of his emotions, yet you were desperate to know his point of view. 

Frustrated, you stood up from the couch and raised your voice slightly, facing the male to express your frustrations throughout the past week.

“Hyunjae, you keep telling me that you always needed some time alone, and yet you always want me back by the end of the day. If we’re not going to do this like how we have intentionally started with, then we’re both just wasting all of our time, really.” 

“Y/N, I thought that we could just be casual about all of this-”

“Casual?” You scoffed. “You never were my best friend to begin with. We are just lab partners, and I was merely concerned about your well-being, so I decided to help out a little.”

“And because I love you.” You choked. 

Hyunjae’s eyes widened upon that statement, and he was about to refute it until you managed to fire back again.

“Have you perhaps fallen in love with me?” 

Hyunjae? In love with you? That can’t be. Both of you agreed upon the rules at the start that all of this was merely helping one another out, and there was no room for falling in love with the other party at all. 

You knew that you had already broken the rule from the start, but it didn’t matter to you as long as you were aware that Hyunjae was getting all of the necessary help and support he needed. But with what Hyunjae has been going through lately, he knew that it was why he had begun to see you differently and how he could not touch and feel you like before. 

The question was if he was ready to move on from his ex. With your help, he should have gotten over it and begun to take things a lot easier, right?

If only your theory were right. 

“I’m sorry, Y/N.” 

That was enough to tell you that all of the efforts that you have put in over the past few months have gone down the drain that easily. 

You were getting teary-eyed, and you began stomping towards the front door, wanting to escape this suffocating environment that you were in. 

With one final sigh, you fired back at the male once more. “Why the fuss, Hyunjae? If you just say you wanna be mine?” 

Just as quickly as you opened the door, you were instantly gone. Tears begin pooling down your face as you take that long, dark, dimly light road back to the comforts of your flat.

Is it that hard to just admit you have feelings for me, Hyunjae? 

Back at Hyunjae’s flat—he was standing there still, fingers running through his hair in a frustrated manner as he took his phone and dialled the only number he knew who could knock in some sense of mind at this hour. 

“Sangyeon-hyung, I messed up real bad.”

You have never felt so dead over the next few weeks ever since that incident at Hyunjae’s flat. Neither of you has spoken a word to one another or even come close to having eye contact at all.

It was tough when you were both assigned lab partners for your chemistry subject and had to talk to your advisor to have your partner physically changed for the rest of the year. It was tough coming up with plausible reasons as to why you wanted him to be switched out with someone else—but ultimately, your request was approved. You were now paired with one of the girls from the class with whom you were not too familiar with, but that was fine by you so long as it wasn’t him. 

Obviously, your efforts did not go unnoticed, and the male eventually tried his best to reach out to you again. But every time you managed to get a slight glimpse of him walking your way, you have always done your best to keep yourself occupied or even walk away to avoid starting up a conversation with him. 

You even tried blocking him off of all of your social media and on your contacts list—he was already swarming you with calls or messages, trying to just talk to you or even apologise for what happened. But honestly, you were just not ready to hear whatever he would say to you, especially when you fell for the man before you started this whole friends-with-benefits relationship. 

I have been such a fool to think he would eventually love me back. 

It was a quiet afternoon when you decided to spend the rest of the day finishing your assignments before the final exams were due in about a week. The library has always been your comfort place to be on campus. Not only can you take a little breather from all the chaos on campus, but you also could take a little nap in between, especially during times like this when you’ve always pulled an all-nighter and your sleep schedule was all messed up. 

Standing up from your seat, you decided to walk down towards one of the halls to get some textbooks that would be helpful as your source of references for the current report you were typing on your computer. 

The peace wouldn’t last long, though, as you felt a presence behind you that you had avoided for the past month. The cologne was what gave his identity away, you would’ve recognised it immediately without a doubt because you used to spend the nights with him all the time. 

You tried your best to ignore the male, constantly trying to fidget through the shelves until you finally grabbed enough materials to return to your table. 

That was until he decided to grab hold of your arm, and now you were left with no escape and choice but to come face-to-face with the person you have been avoiding at all cost. 

“You don’t have to say anything, Y/N. But please, at least, hear me out for a few minutes.” 

Taking in a deep sigh, you laid your head down and looked at your books before muttering to the male. 

“Five minutes.” 

He then lets go of your arms and straightens his back as he clears his throat to finally muster up the courage to tell you what has been trying his best to tell you over the missed calls and messages. 

“First of all, I’m an idiot. I messed up so bad, Y/N. I know I shouldn’t have done nor said what I did back then-”

“Cut to the chase, Hyunjae. I have no time to waste.” 

“Listen. I haven’t been able to look at you the same nor touch you the way I did before because… I am starting to care a lot about you, Y/N. I’m not talking this from a friends-with-benefits stance, but rather as a friend.” 

You scoffed. “So this is what it’s all about? Coming here to apologise and tell me you have changed? I have to laugh if that’s what it is, Hyunjae. Look, if you are sneaking up on me just to tell me that you need me back to do whatever shit that we used to do, then I’m sorry, but I’m done with that phase.” 

He now grips both of your shoulders, trying to knock some sense into you. “No, Y/N. I’m not seeking a sexual relationship with you anymore. I’ve been a jerk not to notice how, during this whole time, I have begun to care a lot about you because you mean more to me as a friend.” 

“And because I have fallen in love with you, Y/N.” 

No. 

No way, it can’t be. Hyunjae has made it clear how he only needed company back then, and he was nowhere near or wanting to begin a new relationship after how messed up his and his ex’s one was. You’ve got to be hearing things, maybe your lack of sleep lately was the key to this. 

“You don’t, Hyunjae. You don’t love me. I was just merely a company for you.” 

“That was before, Y/N. But not anymore.” 

He now takes a step closer to you as he pins you against the bookshelf. 

“And I’m going to make myself clear, miss Y/N. I can now confidently say that I am ready to start anew and begin this new chapter with you. The old Lee Hyunjae that you have known is now gone, and I am willing to spend the rest of my life with you as your boyfriend.” 

Tears began forming in your eyes, and you had to try so hard to fight back the tears and respond to the male. 

“I can’t read your mind, Hyunjae. One day, you told me you needed space and to be alone, and the next thing that happened, you came back to me saying you wanted me back. I do not enjoy this joke in the slightest bit, Hyunjae.” 

He notices how your tears are on the verge of streaming down the beautiful face he has longed to yearn for over the past month, and he now closes the gap between you two, lips now brushing against one another.

“Then let me prove it to you.” 

He shuts you up by placing his soft, gentle lips against yours, and with that, the tears that you have held back for so long begin pouring down like there’s no tomorrow. 

He rests one of his hands around your waist while the other seemingly rests on your right cheek, slowly catching each drop of tears as he wipes them away. 

Oh, how badly you have missed this—the familiar sensation, his cologne, presence, and the soft, luscious lips against yours. 

Both of you were kissing one another as if it was just like the first time you both had done it—tongues were now intertwined, and neither of you were planning to let go anytime soon. 

“Hyunjae—God—Don’t—Stop.” You said in between the kisses as you tried your best to catch your breath. 

“Never planned to do so, Y/N.” 

As he breaks off the kiss and travels down to your neck to nibble and leave a trail of kisses behind, he whispers into your ear before continuing the deed. 

“You may have fallen for me first, but I have fallen for you harder.”

masterlist

taglist: @deoboyznet @kflixnet @k-films @flwoie @hokupi @zzoguri @kyusqult @tinkerbell460 @cheonsafics @sulkygyu (join my permanent taglist here!)

#deoboyznet #kvanity #k-labels #kflixnet #k-films #the boyz #tbz #the boyz x reader #the boyz x imagines #the boyz scenarios #the boyz fanfic #tbz scenarios #hyunjae #lee hyunjae #hyunjae x reader #lee hyunjae x reader #hyunjae imagines #hyunjae scenarios #hyunjae angst #hyunjae suggestive #the boyz angst #the boyz suggestive

[stealanity]

playlist one , the boyz ( lsg to kvm ) :

ꕤ lee sangyeon ,

someone

⠀

[ 7:02am ]

[ 5:12pm ]

[ 6:14am ]

⠀

ꕤ bae jacob ,

summer love

birthday cake

melatonin

co-lover

white lily

⠀

ꕤ kim younghoon ,

corny jokes

reassuring hands

kinda miss you

i didn't forget

⠀

[ 1:02am ]

[ 2:45am ]

⠀

ꕤ lee hyunjae ,

suffocating ( written serie , discontinued )

this special look

stay

waffle

loser, lover

crazy

too late

only for practice

⠀

[ 9:32am ]

[ 4:35pm ]

[ 10:37pm ]

⠀

ꕤ lee juyeon ,

his s/o waking up in the middle of the night

cute little intruder

bad day, but good boyfriend

daydream

terrible idea

the bet

cold hands

risky

sick of you

⠀

[ 5:34pm ]

[ 10:45pm ]

[ 7:52pm ]

[ 8:57pm ]

⠀

ꕤ moon kevin ,

bad words

the little prince

⠀

[ 3:37pm ]

[ 11:23am ]

⠀

. . . link to maknae line !

#⠀stealanity : the boyz masterlist⠀ #the boyz #the boyz imagines #tbz imagines #the boyz scenarios #tbz scenarios #the boyz drabbles #tbz drabbles #the boyz timestamps #tbz timestamps #tbz #tbz x reader #the boyz x reader #tbz fluff #tbz angst #tbz reactions #the boyz reactions #the boyz angst #the boyz fluff #juyeon imagines #lee hyunjae imagines #sangyeon imagines #younghoon imagines #kevin imagines #jacob imagines #lee juyeon #lee hyunjae #bae jacob #moon kevin #kim younghoon

[sungbeam]

𝐜𝐢𝐫𝐜𝐥𝐞𝐬

nonidol!lee hyunjae x f!reader

6.7k words (my hand slipped, sorry), fluff, angst, low-key e2l, ex friends 2 implied lovers?, low-key rich kid au, swearing, drinking and drunk talks/crying, a shitty situation, a bitchy ex gf, uhh very low-key hurt/comfort?, lots of mentions of pizza and soft drinks, THE PLOT IS SO RUSHED IM SORRY I CRAMMED.

a/n: requests now closed! whew,,, what a doozy 😭 im sorry if it feels rushed bc it low-key really was such a rushed and ambitious plot on my part. to the anon who requested it, ik it's not exactly what u asked for and im sorry ><

The pizzeria was like your second home. Maybe it was your home, but you weren't sure if calling a pizza place your home was the best word. It acted as your bubble away from academic responsibilities, family obligations, and anything else you wanted to forget. For the past three years of your college career, you made this place your comfort spot, while also picking up some spare change.

Your friend and co-worker Dae bumped her hip with yours as she passed by you with her hands full of empty plastic cups to refill. "Your group of banshees just walked in," she mused, slipping past you to the fountain drink machine on the bar counter.

Your head perked up and watched the front door on the other side of the room open to let a wave of your friends in. Dae liked to joke that your friend group consisted of a bunch of "banshees" from how loud they could be. You couldn't blame her at all; it was hilariously accurate. On a bad night, the group's volume could reach levels of a nightmare baby being birthed from the Devil's anus.

"Yn-ie!" Chanhee and Jacob waved to you as the group of five made their way through the tight spaces between tables.

"Hey, guys," you greeted them. "You're so lucky a group just left." You nodded toward the circular table in the back corner where your friends often made their home. It was big enough to seat seven—ten, if you squished—but it was almost always for you and your friends.

The pizzeria's owner and your boss, Mr. Moretti, usually didn't mind your friends occupying the space. You were pretty sure he was glad your friends were hiding themselves away in the back. (Not because of the merriment, just because of the noise. Some customers just wanted pizza and a quiet night, and you could respect that.)

"Waitress! Waitress!" Changmin screeched, waving one of his hands around like a lunatic.

You came up to the table with an unimpressed look on your face, and Kevin wrestled his neighbor back into this seat. "Okay, so Changmin doesn't get to eat tonight," you drawled and braced your hands on the backs of Sunwoo and Chanhee's chairs.

"I was just wondering how long it takes for someone to get service around here," Changmin jested. He feigned one of those pompous brushes of his hair, mocking one of the rich pricks who had come in here last month thinking that the RIGHT TO REFUSE SERVICE sign didn't apply to him. Changmin broke into a lopsided grin at your arched brows. "What? I think I'm funny."

Your eyes widened in a silent 'Can you believe this guy?'

"He's sugar high because someone let him get to the cupcakes," Kevin directed his flat gaze to his counterpart, Jacob.

Jacob's hands lifted in innocence. "What? No one was eating them, and he said he was hungry."

"Okay, drinks, folks!" You clapped to regain their attention. You did, after all, have other customers. "What're we feeling tonight?"

A chorus of drink orders flew up into the air—coke, iced water, Sprite, lemonade—and you nodded, stepping away to grab them those very beverages. Your friends had all been here enough times to know exactly what was on the menu, so while you stepped away briefly for their drinks, they could deliberate and get back to you as soon as you returned.

Like a well oiled machine, you delivered them their drinks, and Kevin doled out the lineup for tonight.

"You know, I was thinking of painting my nails black," Kevin said as he finished off the order. He held his hand out in front of him, inspecting the state of his bare nails.

Sunwoo straightened in his seat. "We should do it together, hyung!—I mean… you could probably paint my nails. I dunno if you should trust me with one of those thin ass brushes."

"You're right," Chanhee chimed in, "we shouldn't."

You snickered to yourself as you left your friends to their own devices and pinned their order sheet to one of the clips hanging in the kitchen window. There was a set of plates set out on the window sill, the bill reading for table three, and you picked it up to take over to them. Dae appeared next to you, tightening her ponytail, and grabbed the dishes for table four right beside it.

With both your hands full, you departed to deliver your respective orders.

As you set the dishes off food down onto table three, you heard the telltale swish of the door opening, and night air flooded into the room. On instinct, you straightened with a smile to greet them. "Hi! Welcome—" your voice died on your throat, and when his eyes locked with yours, you stuttered, "—in. For how many?"

Lee Hyunjae brushed a hand through his blond hair, his other arm wrapped around the shoulders of a girl who was unfortunately familiar to you. A couple of the guys with him, you recognized, too, but he was the one who had made you trip over your words.

One of them with jet black hair and kind, feline-like eyes, lifted four of his fingers in a wordless signal.

You nodded, lips set in a firm line, and gestured to the open four-seater at table eight.

You tucked your empty tray beneath your arm, mentally thanking anyone who was listening that his party was seated in Dae's section and not yours. Thank god for odd numbers.

Dae was swift to chirp out her usual cheeriness to the newcomers, and you scurried back over to the register to cash a table's check. As you did so, your eyes flitted up toward Hyunjae's table. He glanced over at you periodically, looking away whenever you were already looking at him.

What the hell was he doing here? You wanted to yell, scream. Out of all the places, out of all the nights, out of all the times… how long had it been since you last saw him, you wondered to yourself as you let the bitterness seep into your bones and meld with the marrow. It was a feeling you knew all too well.

You strode over to table seven to set their check down on the edge of the table. Everything in the pizzeria was so close together; it was near impossible not to catch the words being exchanged at table eight.

"—don't understand why you chose this dump, Hyunjae." That was the girl, the one who's face made you want to throw something at it. Her name was Kyla, and the last time you saw her in person, she had just become Hyunjae's girlfriend.

Sometimes you questioned how they even managed to stay together so long, but then again, people like them deserved each other.

"Eric just wanted pizza, babe," drawled the blond, his arm casually draped over the back of her chair.

The two others seated at the table consisted of the man with jet black hair, and another with a medium-toned brown hair peeking out of a gray hoodie. The latter said, "You guys'll love this place! Their breadsticks are literally the fluffiest things in the world."

A smile curled onto your face at that comment. Now that you thought about it, you'd seen him around before.

You slid over to table one and began stacking the dirty dishes left behind by customers who had gone. Table eight's conversation continued.

"Is it normal to be able to see grease in the air?" Kyla gagged, her nose wrinkling in disgust. She soaked in the close quarters of the restaurant with little appreciation.

The other third wheel at table eight, the one with black hair, lifted his eyebrows. "It's cozy in here, Kyla."

"Yeah, just give it a chance," Hyunjae chimed in.

You brushed past their table to grab table seven's check and hustle it back over to the register. You met Dae at the counter, her hands once again full with cups that needed filling.

A grunt left her lips. "Table eight," she began.

"Yeah," you agreed. "Sheesh."

Her head turned to you over her shoulder. "You know 'em?"

"Unfortunately." You pursed your lips. "It's been awhile," you amended. "I only know the couple at the table—enough to say, good luck, girl."

Dae made a face, but she pulled her shoulders back to solidify her posture. You always admired her work ethic and her customer service skills. As fellow waitresses during many a dinner rush hour, you both had to deal with your own handfuls of difficult people. At this point, it wasn't difficult to sniff them out from a mile away. There were some days you just wanted them to yell at you and get it over with.

Just as Dae left to go drop off drinks, your friends' order hit the window sill. You tucked the finished bill for table seven into your apron pocket and grabbed the trays to set on the table for your friends.

"You look like you're about to gnaw my fingers off, Jacob," you teased with a twinge of nervousness.

The man grinned at you, with teeth. "I'm hungry."

"Valid." You backed away from the table, and the carnage began.

You laughed, ducking your head, as you left your friends to their feast. You arrived at table seven and wished them a good night—

"Do you not have cherry coke? Isn't that, like, a universal fountain drink?"

You glanced over to see Dae's mouth twitch just slightly, but gave nothing else away. "No, we only have regular Coke and Diet Coke; I said that earlier, miss."

Kyla stared at her as if she'd just gotten her puppy revoked. "But they both taste like ass."

"You can have a fruit punch instead," Dae offered.

"But I don't want fruit punch."

You saw that the other two boys at the table fidgeted nervously. They were making eyes at Hyunjae, urging him to do something.

He seemed to lift his gaze to yours at that exact moment and you wondered what he saw in them. Something shifted in him, a silent acceptance of surrender.

The next thing you knew, he was leaning into the conversation. "Ky, you can just get a water or something and then we'll go get a drink after this. How does that sound?"

She threw a look over at him. "I really just want a cherry coke, Hyunjae. If I have to be forced to eat at this place, then the least you could do is get me a cherry coke."

Okay, that was enough.

"Is there a problem here?" You asked, sidling up beside Dae. You saw her loosen up out of the corner of your eye.

Kyla opened her mouth to retort something, but she halted abruptly. Her head cocked to the side, eyes narrowing, like she was trying to figure something out. You knew the moment she recognized you. A slow smile curled onto her mouth. "Oh my god… Yn Ln. Mommy and daddy kick you out or something? Why are you working at this dump?"

You were certain your eye started twitching.

Hyunjae grappled her shoulder. "Kyla."

"This is gold," she chirped. "Wow, I didn't think anything good could come of this dinner, but—" she sneered, "wow. You look awful."

"Takes one to know one," you said with venom dripping from your words. "We have a right to refuse service, ma'am, so if you don't quit badgering my friend and me, then I'm going to have to ask you to leave."

She didn't seem to catch your drift. "No. Get me. A cherry coke."

You suppressed every urge to fuck this girl up. To Dae, you murmured, "Can you cover my tables?"

"For sure, girl," she said, giving you a reassuring clasp on the shoulder. "Should I call Moretti?"

"No, I think we should be fine—"

"Wait until I tell everyone I know about how absolute ass this place is," Kyla ripped you back out into reality. She had her phone out now, and Eric, the guy in the hoodie, was reaching across the table to stop her.

You weren't allowed to touch her, you reminded yourself. You could do this with just words. No matter how much it killed you to not sucker punch her stupid, pearly whites in. "I'm going to have to ask you to leave," you told her through gritted teeth. "Either you buckle down with your regular Coca-Cola, or you get out."

"How about—no."

All breath dissipated from your lungs when you felt the carbonated liquid dumped in your face, the blocks of ice just missing your eyes. The entire establishment seemed to freeze with you.

You scoffed, slowly wiping the soda from your eyes and shaking out your arms. You couldn't seem to form coherent speech.

"What the fuck is going on here?" You recognized Kevin's hardened voice behind you, his hand squeezing your shoulder to tell you he was here.

As Kyla and Kevin dueled it out, you found Hyunjae's eyes again. To his credit, he seemed horrified and apologetic, his mouth parted in shock. But then again, he didn't have much credit anymore in your book.

Your hands fisted. You wanted to yell at him to get out. It had been a decent evening, a good evening, before he and his like came in and threw a drink in your face.

You didn't want to address the burning bitterness that coursed beneath all the annoyance and anger—out of everything, why didn't he say anything? Why didn't he try harder to help you? Why was he with her when he could be with y—nevermind. That didn't matter.

Even now, your back still ached from when he'd last left it stabbed.

"Are you okay, Yn-ie?"

You realized that Hyunjae and his party had gone now, and the shop patrons were slowly going back to whatever they had been doing before. Chanhee appeared before you with a couple napkins from the dispenser on the table, and Dae rushed over with a massive roll of paper towels. Your other friends had flocked over, too, to help clean up and also attend to customers while you pulled your shit together.

You gave a nod, finding your voice to tell them so. Your gaze casted briefly toward the front door where you knew he wouldn't ever be stepping back into.

You told yourself that was a good thing.

It was late when you finally pushed out of the back doors of the pizzeria building. Your car was parked out back with many of the other employee cars; it was just a lot more convenient and a lot less traffic. It had been a couple days since the fiasco with Kyla and Hyunjae, and you hadn't heard or seen him once since then.

That was a good thing. It was supposed to be a good thing. After all, why would he suddenly reappear in your life now? What purpose or what significance did that have?

You were going to try and forget about him again. Your life was plenty good without him, and yet…

"Yn."

Speak of the Devil. You swore under your breath as you nearly tripped over the curb. His voice was haunting, as was his presence, his whole silhouette. You'd once found a home with all those things—with him.

You and he stopped beside your car. "What are you doing here?" You asked him.

Hyunjae had his hands shoved into the pockets of his leather jacket. "I, uhm," he began, "I wanted to say sorry."

"Sorry?" You parroted. The word was sticky in your mouth and it clung to all the wrong crevices.

"Yeah, for the other night." He clasped the back of his neck. "I… I broke up with her, by the way."

Your eyes widened at his words. He broke up with Kyla? A part of you wanted to pump the sky and jump up and down—finally. Fucking finally! But there was another part of you, the rational one, who yanked you back to Earth and smacked you in the head to think about it. Three years of dating that girl, and just now he decided to break up with her? What was the tipping point? There was no way he didn't know she acted like a spoiled brat all the time.

What was so good about her anyway? You thought you had understood at the time—she had more money, more connections. Her parents were old money rich, not entrepreneurs like yours. It was stupid to think that was the reason, and you couldn't afford to go down that rabbit hole of methodology again.

"So?"

Your singular word seemed to slap him in the face. "So? I—" Frustration flickered across his face for a split second. Now he knew how you felt.

You couldn't wait for him to say anything; you had so much to say to him. "Listen Jaehyun," you said plainly. "I don't know what you want from me. You broke up with your girlfriend? Good for you. You're sorry for the other night? Okay. I don't know if you expect me to grovel and praise you for owning up for once—"

"Okay, what?" He cut in. "First of all, I don't expect you to grovel or praise me or whatever. Second, what do you mean 'owning up for once?'"

"I mean it exactly like I said it." You clenched the strap of your bag in your hand. Crazy how your car was literally right next to you, but you couldn't get into it. Your feet were glued to the street, and a part of you wanted to know how this ended. "The last time I saw you, Kyla laughed in my face, and you encouraged her. You dropped me like our years of friendship meant jack shit to you. I don't know what you're trying to pull, Jaehyun, and I don't wanna know."

Hyunjae leaned his head back, eyes closed for a second. "Yn, it's so much more complicated than that."

You stuck your tongue in your cheek. "That's such bullshit, and you know it. You don't get to come back and tell me this." There was a shakiness in your voice now, and you knew you had to get going or risk yelling. "That's just not fair."

"I know it's not fair."

"Good."

"Fine," he bit out. "I don't even know why I'm here."

Your hand found purchase on the driver's side door. Say something. Give me a reason to stay. "Maybe your sense of guilt has finally returned and your brain wanted to make amends."

He rolled his eyes, and it felt like a stab in your chest. "I'm going to leave now."

"Thank god." The words tasted sour in your mouth and you realized that he hadn't given you a reason to stay; in fact, it had been the exact opposite.

You both went your separate ways again. When you clambered into your car and watched him walk away through your rear view, it dawned on you that the entire conversation had been one massive circle. You wanted to hear him out—of course, you did.

You used to know him, after all. You used to know him so well. And perhaps that was why you hadn't just now.

"We need to talk."

A pair of hands slammed down on your desk and you nearly fell out of your chair. You tugged your earbuds out of your ear to give whoever this was a piece of your—

You frowned. "Oh. It's you."

Hyunjae frowned back at you. He was wearing a jean jacket today, hair styled presentably. He didn't have to look so good in this lighting, but you supposed even the sun liked to favor him. "Yes, it's me. Can you get up so we can—" He nodded out toward the library window beside you, "—talk?"

"So you want us to jump out the window?"

"You are so annoying."

Your smile was saccharine. "Not as annoying as you."

It had currently been around fifteen hours since he showed up at the back alley to confront you with that sorry apology. You'd woken up this morning less mad and more sad… smad. Sure, you were smad. It seemed that a night of sleep hadn't deterred your ex-best friend from talking to you, and you couldn't decide if that was a good or bad thing.

"You don't even go to this school," you told him in a pathetic attempt to wave him away without actually waving him away.

"This is a public campus, Yn." He pulled out the seat across from you before you could protest. "I don't have to go to this school."

You scowled. The organ in your chest was beating awfully fast—you really hoped you weren't about to get in a screaming match with him here of all places. "What do you want, Hyunjae? You can't just show up everywhere I go unannounced."

"I don't do that."

"I'm starting to think you're obsessed with me, actually."

"Will you just—"

"Heya, Yn." Relief flooded through you at the sight of Changmin and Sunwoo walking up to your table. The former narrowed his eyes behind his dark-framed glasses. "Everything okay?"

You flipped your notebook closed and swiftly packed all of your items up. "Yeah, perfectly," you said. Hyunjae didn't follow as you stood up. "Bye, Hyunjae."

As you walked toward the library exit, Changmin and Sunwoo converged on either side of you. "What was that all about?" Sunwoo asked, his head peering behind you at the boy who was no doubt still sitting at the table. "Why is he here?"

You shook your head and pushed out onto the university grounds, propping the door open for your friends trailing behind. "Dude, I have no idea. He dropped by on my way out of work last night—"

"He what?"

"It wasn't even a productive conversation," you told them. You didn't know where you were going, but you turned around to face them as you walked backward along the path. Maybe you shouldn't have just left him there. "I don't even know how he knew I was at the library."

Changmin's mouth quirked downward. "Isn't this like… kind of creepy? What's with him anyway?"

"Yeah, Yn, how do you know him?" Sunwoo chimed in.

You sighed, face scrunching up as you thought about where to begin. Swiveling back to front, your friends clung onto you—both physically and to your words. "Our parents loathe each other, because they're business rivals, but Hyunjae and I went to the same schools when we were kids and we became friends."

It had been the two of you against the world—best petty friends. That first time his parents had driven him over to your house for a play date, the looks on both yours and his parents had been priceless. It'd been a wonder that they'd let you continue with the play date. From that point on, however, you both became friends for life, all despite the odds.

At least, that was how it had been.

Three years ago, just before both of you were going to begin your college careers, he had pretended that everything between the two of you was nothing more than dumpster fire. He ended up with Kyla, he became a jerk, and you'd spiraled. Had it been something you'd done? Had it been you? Did his parents open his eyes to your families' petty rivalry and get him to turn on you? That was what it had seemed like.

You'd survived, somehow. You had friends now—good friends, nice friends, un-petty friends. (But Hyunjae had been that person for you, too, once upon a time.)

You found yourself in your apartment at six in the evening the next day, staring at a half-drunk glass of wine and a crossword on your coffee table. You'd snatched up one of the newspapers in the lobby to busy yourself with in an attempt to take your mind off thrown cups of coke, bitchy ex girlfriends, and bitter ex friends.

It hadn't worked yet.

A knock on your front door drew your focus away, and you dragged yourself up from the couch to see who it was. Something panged in your chest at the face on the other side of the peephole.

You ripped the door open. "Do you want a restraining order?"

Hyunjae stood on the other side looking a little less put together than yesterday, but still more put together than you. "Yn, can we please just talk?"

"How do you even know where I live?" You asked him, not moving from the threshold, and thus, leaving him no room to come in.

"I literally helped you move in three years ago," he said, blinking. Oh. "Now, can I please come in?"

At least he was saying please, you reasoned with yourself. Begrudgingly, you let him in.

His shoulders seemed to deflate as he slipped inside, and he left his shoes on the show rack by the front door. Once you'd replaced all the locks, you swept past him to your kitchen area. "Want a drink?"

"Uhm, sure. Yeah, thanks."

You came back to the couch with another glass and poured him some of the red.

The two of you sat on the couch beside each other with a comfortable amount of space in the middle. He picked up his glass and chugged the entire thing, while you finished off your own glass and reached for the bottle. It felt so strange to be in his space again—or at least, for him to be in your space again. You didn't know if the jittery kick in your heart was from nervousness, excitement, or both.

What more did he have to say to you?

When you topped your glass off again, Hyunjae refilled his own.

"What do you want from me, Hyunjae?" You asked him for what felt like the hundredth time within the past week. You didn't have the heart to look at him now, the alcohol making your brain buzz and your chest heavy.

He nursed his glass, elbows braced on his knees. "I'm sorry," he said, clearing his throat when his voice came out rough. He fidgeted with the collar of his shirt. "You're probably so fucking tired of me, but I just… I knew I had to make things right."

You tugged your legs onto the couch and tucked them under you. "Why? Because you broke up with your girlfriend for throwing soda in my face?" For a moment, the thought amused you. Out of all the things to break up with Kyla for—out of all the things—it'd been over Coca-Cola.

Hyunjae swallowed down his wine. "No, that's not—that's not why I wanted to break up with her. I mean, part of it, of course. She'd disrespected you and your friend and the workplace."

His words and their sincerity drew your eyes to him on your left. His head hung, but you could see the glazed look in his eyes, dulling out those pretty, mahogany irises of his. He looked like your Hyunjae for once, not the one who had appeared in the doorway of the pizzeria with his arm around a girl who didn't appreciate him or anyone.

"And I'm sorry for that," he continued. "I'm sorry I didn't do more to prevent that from happening."

You stared down into the dark stillness of your wine glass. "Well, it wasn't exactly your fault," you said quietly.

You heard him huff, "Yeah, sure." He lifted the glass up to his lips again, and you did the same.

"The little altercation was recorded and posted online," Hyunjae suddenly said. "And when my parents saw, they pretty much backed out of the partnership between our company and Kyla's parents'. They didn't let me break up with her before because of the contract or whatever, but after that PR nightmare, they pretty much cut ties for me."

He took another swig, and you found yourself really looking at him this time.

"I was and have been an asshole to you, Yn," he said. "And it's no excuse, but it was… I was just trying to make it easier for both of us."

The wine was penetrating your defenses. Or maybe that was his story. But either way, the stinging in the corners of your eyes led to a watering of your vision, and everything was getting blurry. The lights, him, your whole view of the situation. His parents hadn't turned him, but shackled him instead.

"I thought," you began, lifting a hand up to wipe your eyes dry, "you hated me."

Hyunjae raised his head, shaking it, then hanging it again. He drank. "I couldn't hate you. I tried—I tried to make it easier to see you differently, but… Yn, you were my best friend." His voice broke at the end and he swallowed. "I thought about you so much these past few years, and it was so hard to get through it without you."

Your heart was sinking fast into your stomach and you could feel it hammer against your bones. You'd thought about him too much, as much as you loathed to admit. The man who you felt had simply thrown you away… how pathetic was it that you couldn't stop caring? But now, the lens was widening. Maybe your feelings weren't so unique.

Both you and Hyunjae moved at the same time, arms raising to drain your glasses of the last bits of wine.

You told yourself it was the wine that was making you want to cry, but when you and Hyunjae looked at each other, his eyes were lined with silver. He sniffled, setting his glass on the coffee table. "I'm sorry," he whispered, biting his lip when emotion made him screw his face up and turn away from you.

You put your glass next to his and clambered over the sofa to wrap your arms around him. He turned his face into your chest and sobbed, the sound coaxing a crest of emotion out of you, too, and you held him and rocked him through the oncoming waves.

It was the wine, you thought. God it was the wine. It had to be the wine.

But your best friend was here in your arms, where he belonged, you liked to think. He was home.

You curled your hand over the back of his head, your cheeks damp. "'m sorry they forced you into that relationship," you rasped. The bitterness was sweeping back in a different color. "I wish I knew."

He sniffled. "They threatened to do something to your parents' company. I couldn't—I couldn't let you and them get involved."

The confession stabbed through you. You had no idea what his parents had told him, and made him do, for the sake of business. You had no idea how unhappy he was, and god—you wished you'd known. Maybe things wouldn't have come to such hurt.

Hyunjae pulled himself away from you and wiped his eyes. "I think after all that shit, I'm a little fucked up."

The both of you shared a watery laugh, the space that had originally been left between you, nonexistent.

You cupped the sides of his face. "You made it though, and you've been so strong, Jae."

His bottom lip trembled. "Can you ever forgive me?"

"Yeah," you nodded. "Yeah, I forgive you." How could you not? And it was the wine—you swore it was the wine—that had you leaning forward and pressing a kiss to his hairline. His eyes fluttered shut as he leaned into you, his hand reaching up to cover your hand with his own.

"I like you a whole lot better than her," he murmured.

"I'd hope so," you mused, patting his cheek. "You deserve to have someone so much better than her."

He gulped, eyes searching your face. "You think so?"

"I know so."

Your heartbeat stuttered when he leaned forward slightly. You could smell the wine on his breath as it fanned over your skin. It felt as if the world slowed in that moment—the lights were dimmer, his eyelids low, lips shiny and plush.

And then he blinked, energy and alarm and… something else in his expression. He pulled out of your hold and his ears turned bright red. "I should go."

Your lips parted. "Wait—"

He practically leapt off the couch and banged his knee against the wall as he hobbled into his shoes. "Damn—I—" he opened the front door, pausing over the threshold. You didn't know why he was leaving; you wanted him to stay. Why, why, why was he leaving? "I, uhm, I've overstayed my welcome."

The door rattled as he closed it behind him, as if to tell you to not follow him out. You were left on the couch alone again, two empty glasses of wine, feeling stripped.

What the hell was that?

"And he just… left?"

You nodded, sweeping the apron around your waist over the hook in the back room of the pizzeria. It was late when yours and Dae's shift ended, as per usual. The shop was pretty much closed, leaving the two of you and two of the cooks who usually closed up the establishment when you both left.

For the entirety of your shift, you had been turning over yesterday's events over and over again. "I don't know what I did wrong, y'know? Maybe I crossed a boundary or something? I dunno."

Worry gnawed at your stomach as you recalled what happened to Dae. You both stepped out of the back of the building to head to your respective cars. It was dark out, as it usually was, with a few street lights along the road that you and Dae stuck to while walking.

As you approached your car, you noticed Hyunjae standing beside it with his hands tucked in his pockets and his head turned toward you. Rather than the sourness you'd felt for him at the beginning of the week, the feeling twisting in your chest was sweeter, but bitter still.

"I'll see you tomorrow then," Dae said to you softly with a gentle nudge of your arm. She walked ahead of you and passed by your car to get to hers, leaving you to confront the man plaguing your every thought for the past week.

You swallowed as you made your way over to the driver's side door where he was standing. "Hey."

Hyunjae gave a slight bob of his head. "Hey."

"Did I do something wrong yesterday?" You asked him, earnestly, searching his face for any hint as to why he had left so abruptly.

"No, it wasn't your fault—it definitely wasn't your fault," he told you. He sucked in a breath, carding a hand through his hair. "I had an epiphany of sorts."

"An epiphany?" You furrowed your brows.

His cheeks had flushed slightly, and he couldn't exactly meet your eyes. "I thought it was just the alcohol clouding my judgment, and in combination with all the emotions, and I just—" he shook his head. "It's probably not important, but…"

You bumped your elbow with his. "Jae, you're here. It probably is important."

A small smile curled up onto his face. "Y'know," he began, finally lifting his head to look you in the eyes, "she would have agreed with me and brushed me off."

You knew who the "she" he was talking about was. You frowned. "She was never good enough for you, Hyunjae."

"I know." He sighed. "I just wanna be enough for you though now."

Surprise lit across your face, and you could feel the butterflies in your stomach start to take flight. You couldn't think coherently with his words, and you were probably reading into it too much. The two of you had been away so long that you probably forgot how to read him; there was no doubt that something changed over the past three years, right?

When you failed to find a reply, he shifted slightly, his body facing straight toward you. "I've had a lot of time to think, and the whole time I was with her, I just kept comparing her to you." He stepped closer to you and his hand reached out to tentatively take your fingers with his. "She never measured up; maybe that made me even more bitter for ruining our friendship."

You met his eyes. There was that glimmer of the rich brown like what you'd seen last night. (Your Hyunjae was present and accounted for.) "What… what are you saying?"

"I'm saying that I," he said, fully taking your hands with his, "would like to start over on a slightly different note. But if you don't feel the same, we can start wherever you're comfortable with."

It would be different, you realized. But it would be a good different, right?

You found your voice, curled your fingers around his in the space between you. "Okay."

His smile slowly widened, his eyes squinting into upturned crescent moons. "Okay?"

You nodded, returning the expression. "Let's start over on that different note."

The pizzeria was as alive as usual. It was warm, smelled like tomatoes and cheese and bread, and it was still your home away from home. You had just finished your break and were tying your apron back on when Dae bumped her hip against yours as she passed by with a tray of dirty dishes.

"Your banshees just got in," she said, before disappearing through the kitchen doors.

Your gaze went to the door where you found your five friends, and the additional three, who were filing in altogether. You made eye contact with one person in particular, his smile softening into something fond at the corners of his mouth. He lifted a hand in greeting, grabbing everyone else's attention as they said their hellos to you.

The eight of them made their way over to the round table in the back corner, piling into the chairs around it.

"Waitress! Waitress!" The hyena-like sound set off an alarm in your head and you came over to the table to give Changmin a stink eye. He grinned innocently. "Oh yay, it worked."

You gave him an unimpressed look. "You sound like a chihuahua."

"Joke's on you, I think chihuahuas are cute," he huffed, leaning back in his chair with his arms crossed over his chest.

You braced your hand on the back of Hyunjae's chair, the other one gently patting the top of his head. He acknowledged your greeting, his hand reaching up to cover yours on the chair back. "What's to drink, y'all?"

A chorus of beverages rang out, and you mentally counted the few repeats and the singles. You promised to be right back, and left to go grab them. As you went, you could hear your boys start up a lively debate about the multipurpose properties of the lemon. You wondered if that was what they had been bickering about on the car ride over here, and you heard Eric say something about lemons for cleaning; Juyeon just said lemonade; and Changmin said for inflicting "more pain." (No, you didn't want to know.)

When you returned to their table to pass out your drinks, you went around, leaving Hyunjae for last. You set his cup of coke in front of him and he passed you a smile.

"You're not gonna dump that on me, are you?" You asked, eyes narrowing playfully.

He grinned. "As long as you don't dump me, we're good."

Sunwoo made a face from across the table. "Yuck, get a room!"

Chanhee smacked him upside the head. "At least they have someone to be yucky with."

"This feels familiar somehow," Kevin pondered aloud. "Like déjà vu."

Jacob shrugged. "Maybe in another universe. I dunno, it seems like something we would have said to Sunwoo at some point."

"Hey!—"

You were halfway through a laugh when Hyunjae caught your attention, twisted around in his chair to smile up at you. "What's up?" You asked him.

His eyes, you could never get sick of his eyes. They glistened in the lighting here. "Nothing," he said swiftly, "I'm just… happy to be here." With you.

You understood, and you caught his hand on the back of the chair and gave him a little squeeze. "I'm happy you're here, too." It seemed that some things were just meant to come full circle.

tbz m.list

permanent taglist: @flwoie @vatterie @seomisaho @hqrana @ja4hyvn @tinkerbell460 @kaaimins @hyunjaespresent-deobi @otterly-fey @zzoguri @floatingpluto @winterchimez @ethereal-engene @gyulfriend @polarisjisung @jaehunnyy @shakalakaboomboo @loveliestfelix @bless-311 @zhaixiaowen @leaz-kpop-life @amourdsr @pxppxrminty @kqyutie @sseastar-main @kxthleen14 @fluorescentloves @mosviqu @justalildumpling @jaerisdiction @super-btstrash-posts @jundundun @http-gyu @mvvnsseul @outrologist @vernonburger @maessseongs @kflixnet @ericlvr

#deoboyznet #kflixnet #bjnet #the boyz x reader #lee hyunjae x reader #hyunjae x reader #the boyz oneshot #the boyz angst #the boyz imagines #the boyz drabbles #the boyz scenarios #the boyz fanfic #hyunjae drabbles #hyunjae angst #hyunjae imagines #hyunjae oneshots #hyunjae scenarios

[loverseon]

SOUL SWAP .ᐟ masterlist coming soon ᯓ★

pairing female reader x ???

genre royal au, fantasy, kinda mystery ish

synopsis you wake up in a bedroom thats not your own. curtains that arent your own, bed thats not your own. a life thats not your own. no one around you seems to take you very seriously when you try and explain that youre… not exactly who they think you are. but hey, who are you to complain when everywhere you look theres a handsome man who wants you?

word count tbd (around 30k+)

warnings angst, fluff, themes of death, suggestive (tbz being sexy what can i say) cursing, slow burn, gradual pairing reveal, will add more tags as we progress

teaser one moodboard playlist

part i. the dream of the golden bedroom

part ii. the hero of the first water

part iii. the saviour of the fallen

part iv. the master of the wild

part v. the commander of the gods

part vi. the ceremony of the conqueror

part vii. the end of the beginning

part viii. epilogue: the princess of stars

a/n shakes u by the shoulders ohhhh its happeninf its happeningg

#the boyz #the boyz au #the boyz angst #tbz fluff #tbz au #tbz angst #tbz #royal #kpop au #fantasy #the boyz fantasy au #the boyz fanfiction #the boyz fanfic #tbz fanfic #tbz smut #the boyz smut #tbz fantasy #tbz royal #the boyz royal #lee sangyeon #jacob bae #kim younghoon #lee hyunjae #lee juyeon #kevin moon #choi chanhee #ji changmin #ju haknyeon #kim sunwoo #eric sohn

[from-izzy]

[02:04] | tbz lee jaehyun | hyunjae

» ​PAIRING: tbz lee jaehyun (hyunjae) x fem reader​ » TROPE/AU​: friends 2 lovers (mentioned from backstory!), non-idol au! established relationship au! marriage au! » GENRE​: fluffy fluff, slight angst (?), ​husband hyunjae, he's super patient and understanding, hurt/comfort, wedding vows (it's so cute, i love it) » WORD COUNT: ​3743 » ESTIMATED READING TIME: ~14 mins » WARNINGS (lmk if i missed anything!): mentions of pregnancy, insecurities, mentions of a broken family/childhood (reader's side), proofread once

my second timestamp story! thank you for all the love on the first one! (pst! it's sunwoo! 🦝) hopefully, this one lives up to your expectations! (if there are any uwu). sorry for my weird, unscheduled, random posting times > <

shoutout to my mum who (i bet) went through a lot to make sure i would grow up well. thank you for always reminding me that you don't regret having me and loving me with all your being. love you mumma! 💗

navi/masterlist!!

You remembered when you tucked yourself into bed alone after reminding Jaehyun to come to bed soon. He was so close to finishing his work that you didn’t want to force him out of his zone, understanding that he would feel more peaceful if he finished it sooner even if it meant ruining his internal body clock a little bit for it.

Opening your eyes and taking a deep breath in the calming darkness, you smiled at the arm that rested across your now flat stomach. During your whole pregnancy stages, especially when that wicked pregnancy pillow put a physical barrier between you and your loving husband, he would at least reach out and hold your hand (or particularly your stomach bump), a huge downgrade from how his chest would completely be on your back and he hushes you asleep with his soft snores. 

You knew as soon as you turned your head to the right that Jaehyun managed to finish his work, a neutral smile on his face as compared to the slight pout and the subtle crease between his eyebrows as he sometimes grunts in his sleep from the past few days. An affectionate gaze falls upon your eyes when Jaehyun grunts and scoots over to your side of the bed, his unconscious mind telling him to move closer to his wife after he throws the pillow away to the other side of the room in excitement as soon as your new family arrived home three days ago. You chuckle at the way his right hand past the top of your stomach to hook your waist and pull you closer to him. Now half awake, Jaehyun made himself comfortable by burrowing his nose and lips into the crook of your neck and you immediately looked up towards the ceiling to let him do so.

A satisfied hum comes out from the man beside you, “This is nice.” He brushes the warm skin of your neck with his colder nose and his soft lips press multiple kisses from your jawline to your right shoulder.

“Jae.” You chuckle at his playful nature, “Go back to sleep, hm? You have work tomorrow.”

Jaehyun groans at the grim reminder. He’s been at home ever since you came back home, using up some of his leave days to take care of you and your newborn child. He was about to use it all but you stopped him, convincing him that you’re able to take care of yourself and your child, moreover to save those days in case a ‘real’ emergency does occur. Every day and every moment, you look at your husband who you treasure so much and you can’t help but think about how much you love this man with all your heart, mind and soul.

“Don’t remind me of that, bubs.” Finally opening his eyes, he relied on the subtle moonlight that seeped through your curtains and looked at your side view with ‘that’ gaze. 

‘That’ gaze that reminds you every day that you’re worth it for you. ‘That’ gaze that he kept even after ten years of meeting each other. ‘That’ gaze that was plastered on his face when he went down on one knee to propose to you. ‘That’ gaze that was present when he read his wedding vows and wiped the tears on your face when you read yours. ‘That’ gaze (mixed with immense happiness and excitement) when you told him you were pregnant. 

It holds many meanings and you were sure that the list would continue, building from all the blessed experiences so far.

Only chuckling at the way that he pouts cutely at you, you turn your body to face him, creating a small gap between you both as you press a peck on his lips, “Thank you for using your leave days to take care of us.”

“Of course, I would.” Jaehyun shook his head slightly to validate his point, “You both are my whole world. I can’t afford to lose you or baby.” It was the way that your eyes slightly pooled with tears that he replaced the pout and shushing the soft whimpers that left your now shaky lips, “Hey…what’s wrong?”

Your once small cries amplified drastically and Jaehyun’s eyes widened in shock, quickly pulling you into his embrace. He slips his left hand under your neck, bringing your tear-stricken face into his chest as you sob in his arms. Jaehyun comfortingly whispers sweet nothings into your ear, patting your head and pressing occasional kisses on your forehead. You stayed wordless for a while, enjoying the company and how close your entire body could be now after you gave birth.

“Catch your breath. I’ll be right here.” Jaehyun reminds you between your tired gasps for air, “I’ll always be here next to you, waiting for you, loving you more and more with each passing day.”

You couldn’t do anything but just nod, your heart melting at the sincere words, “I’m scared.”

“Of what, bubs?”

“Like,” You started, audibly voicing out the thoughts that have been swarming and eating you alive inside and out, “what happens if I mess up?”

It isn’t the first time that you had this kind of conversation. The very first time was when the adrenaline from your system was drained after announcing that positive pregnancy test to Jaehyun. You voiced out your worries as an upcoming parent, worried that you would accidentally pass down your problems, anxiety and worries to your child. Out of everything you want the most in the world, all you want is for your children to grow up without your traumas and problems affecting them because that’s not the kind of life that they deserve. Of course, that’s unrealistic. Children are indeed a slight depiction of their parents and how they would act around other people outside the family says a lot about how their parents raised them.

You can just imagine a situation where your anxiety takes over, you crouch down to be eye level with your extremely young child, giving them a lecture about what they should or shouldn’t do, extending that talks to both extreme sides of ‘what if’s and how they should just be more careful, less daring and---

“Jae, promise me that you’ll make sure she doesn’t grow up like me.” It was a desperate plea, almost as if you would walk out of their lives in the next second. The anxiety completely took over your body as you clenched Jaehyun’s shirt in your fist as a physical response, looking up at him desperately and Jaehyun’s eyebrows crashed together, “She doesn’t deserve that, Jae. Those silent cries, hating everyone around me, feeling like no one loved me and wanting to just end---”

“Don’t.” It was stern yet it still held a lot of patience and love. Jaehyun smiles sadly at the words that he has heard multiple times but even so, he would never stop reminding you of all the things he loves about you. He would never stop hugging you, holding your body and pulling you towards him, giving you all his love and company, “Don’t say that about yourself when you’re the reason why I wake up happy every day, bubs.”

“But Jae---”

“You know,” He whispers into the silent yet wavering night. Jaehyun takes a deep inhale of the air, tilting his head to rest his chin on the top of your head, “I was so scared of losing you as time went on.”

You calmed down, shutting your eyes as you focused on his heartbeat to pull you back to the present time. Jaehyun just smiles at the slightly open door of your room and he reminds himself of his newborn child on the other side of their bedroom door. When you hummed confusingly at his words, your husband just nodded, “Why were you scared?”

“Well,” If it wasn’t for the fact that your face was hidden into his collarbone, you would be able to see the blushing mess that Jaehyun was. A deep red blush was on his face, spreading to his ears; but you did feel the warmth on his neck as you kissed his skin delicately and it made Jaehyun more of a mess, “of course if it didn’t work out and you didn’t feel the same way, it would become awkward and even though we were such close friends, I knew that if I was rejected, I wouldn’t be able to spend as much time with you anymore. I really could’ve lost you.”

You never really knew this about Jaehyun. Whenever you asked about the day that he confessed to you to be his girlfriend, he only talked about his plans and how your mutual friends all pushed him to confess to you. You also told him about how the same mutual friends pushed you to confess back to him, yet you were a coward that you became used to telling yourself that if you ever ended up with Jaehyun, it would only hinder him in life; because who would love a broken girl when they could love a perfect one instead?

And so when he confessed, asked for a chance and promised to love you dearly after two years of mutual pining, you didn’t realise that time flew by so quickly that on the sixth year when Jaehyun kneeled and asked for your hand in marriage two years ago, a sudden hit of ‘reality’ (or so you called it) crashed into you. 

You really did find love when you thought for the longest, most tiring and hardest times when you didn’t think anyone would love you as you are. Seriously, how could anyone love you when you were still so stuck between believing and convincing yourself that you are enough? 

“I knew I had to take a chance,” Jaehyun continues his thoughts, “because when I closed my eyes and realised that if I didn’t at least try to make you mine, you might just completely slip from my life. Selfishly as well, I didn’t want to see you smiling in another person’s arms and kissing that person every time you wake up and go to sleep.”

The thought of you two doing just that ever since you moved in together five years ago suddenly made you blush and you couldn’t help but let out a string of complaints. Jaehyun just laughs (and quietly lets out a sigh of relief) when you finally release his shirt, wrapping your small hands around his bigger build instead, “I’m sorry that I didn’t realise that you went through all that.”

“No, it’s alright.” He reassures you again for the nth time in the last hour, “I have you now. You are all I ever wanted.” Pulling away and reaching to cup your wet cheeks, his thumbs swipe your almost dry cheek, offering you that familiar warmth that only he could give, “It’s all worth it in the end.”

“Really?” Another tear managed to slip out of your eyes and you couldn’t help but stare at him apprehensively as the devil inside your mind managed to manipulate your thinking, “I’m such a high-maintenance person, Jae…I really wouldn’t blame you if you wake up one day and decide to just…” He shakes his head throughout your small speech, knowing the similar words that you would say to him once in a while, “leave…” It came out quieter than you thought, maybe because he already knew anyway, hence saying it again and again, the red-horned creature in your mind rejoices as your childhood traumas reminded you of how worthless you are to the world.

Usually at this time, Jaehyun would rebut your words immediately but the silence had your heart dropping and for a while, you thought that you had taken the words out of his mouth. Jaehyun kept his tired stare and suddenly you were aware of your dry mouth as you waited for any sort of words from your husband. He removes the hand that was on your cheek, reaching behind to grab his device from the bedside table, “Hold on, okay?”

For a second, you really thought this was it for the both of you. During these moments of much-needed comfort, Jaehyun has always given you his undivided attention but now as the blue light reflects on his squinting eyes, you couldn’t help but let the tears flow down your eyes once again. Did he finally give up on me? Were the only thoughts that swarmed your mind as you watched how his thumb scrolled and colours reflected on the smooth surface of his dewy skin, “Jae?” Time made you desperate for a response and you were about to clench on his shirt again when he let out a small ‘aha’ and played the video on his phone.

You recognised the scene on his phone immediately without looking. The familiar scene, cheers, whooping and excitement radiating off the background noises had you sobbing again. Jaehyun sets the volume, puts his phone back on the bedside table and gives you his attention again, “My mum was sorting videos on her phone when she came across this and sent it to me.” He presses a comforting kiss on your lips and calms your shaking body, “I’m sure you remember this right?”

You just nod and Jaehyun pulls your face into his chest once again, letting the sound from the video consume you both into your worlds.

“As soon as you stepped into those classroom doors, all eyes were on you and undoubtedly mine too.” You were already starting to tear up just from the first few sentences, “Ah…I only just started…” You scanned your next words, just sniffling from the longer sentences that you didn't know how to not cry to while the audience let out words of encouragement and small laughs. 

Your soon-to-be husband steps towards you, kissing the side of your head, “Should I go first?”

“Do you mind?” You laugh, feeling embarrassed. 

“Not at all.” Jaehyun takes out his paper from his suit, taking the microphone from you, “I already knew this would happen guys.” He announced to the audience and you rolled your eyes jokingly, “Ok…I’ll start.”

You knew very well that your eye makeup was most probably ruined and you looked some sort of a mess at the moment so you couldn’t help but stare down at the floor. Jaehyun gives you a quick kiss on the crown of your head, swooning the audience with his romantic gesture making him chuckle before clearing his throat and starting his vows.

“I remember the day I walked into that classroom on my first day of school. No doubt, I didn’t want to be there. Not just at that school or at that classroom: I just didn’t want to be in Seoul. The sudden move because of my dad’s work made me leave all the memories I had in Incheon in a month and as an innocent young child who was already happy with everything, I didn’t want to leave.

Alas, even my mother told me we had to go and that’s when I knew that moving was inevitable. School work was already hard as it was and I had to move to a big city where I knew no one, having to start all over again from the ‘Hi. My name is Lee Jaehyun. I hope we’ll get along well.’ really made me reach the peak of my mood swings during puberty.”

Jaehyun alternates his eye contact between you and the audience who reacts to the groom with happiness, and laughter as some of his closest friends give him encouraging, funny body language. He points them out and the said friends complain whilst the audience just laughs at the group of boys on the side of the stage. However, it was how you finally raised your head and laughed along that made Jaehyun join in as well.

“For the first few weeks, I didn’t make an obvious effort to fit in. As you know, I joined clubs and did after-school activities. Studying was still my priority at this point but even that became so mundane and boring that I crashed and burnt out after a while. But maybe, the burnout was just what I needed because that was how I first met you. Had I not cried in the corner of the library in the ironically ‘health and wellbeing’ section, would you have even spoken to me? Would you have crouched down and tapped on my shoulder to ask if I was okay? Would you have sat down next to me silently as you read your book, waiting for me to answer your question?

The answer is: yes. Or at least I would like to believe so.

Why? Because no one will fully ever understand how much I love you. Maybe if it wasn’t that day in the library, I would’ve met you later. How much later, nobody knows and nobody will ever know because I’m about to marry that girl who made my day so much better in the library. But what I do know is that no matter when, where, why or how we would’ve met, I would have still fallen in love with your smile, your pout, your laugh, and the way you cutely complain about how I mess up your bubble tea order,” Jaehyun gives you a cheeky smile and you just scoff with a smile on your face, “the way you would cry in my arms when you had a bad day, the way you would drop everything when I have a bad day, the way you would try your best to stay awake until I’m done with my other priorities. 

But bubs, I hope you’ll always know that you’ll forever be my first, most top priority.

Even as we fight, cry and shout at each other words that we don’t mean, I hope you’ll always be able to go to sleep thinking that I’ll still love you. I’ll still be right by your side when your insecurities come by and pass. I’ll always remind you that you’ll always be enough no matter what you do. Your best will always be enough and I hope I’ll always be that person who can be your safe, happy place.”

No doubt now that you’re sobbing and when you look at your parents sitting down not far from the stage, your heart does clench a bit as you’re reminded of your childhood. Seeing them cry over Jaehyun’s words does seem a little bit strange to you as they never really minded your words whenever you were struggling with life. But then you remind yourself of what Jaehyun said to you a few seconds ago.

“I know for sure that you’ll always be enough for me.” Jaehyun continues, taking your mind off your parents as he looks at you understandingly, “I love you and I know I’ll continue to love you until the day I take my last breath. I’ll take care of you even when you’re not sick or feeling well, cherish all of you and be there for you even after death because I love you so much, sweetheart.”

The recording ended there and Jaehyun relished in the way that your body stopped shaking, your arms around his waist securely and your breathing back to normal. He knows instantly that you feel better just from those small actions. He also didn’t miss the smile that grew on your face even though you were literally cuddled up against his body, “So,” the deep whisper from your husband only made you push your face even further up his body, now burying your face into his collarbone, “I just want to tell you that she will grow up beautifully just like her mother. Also, we’ll get through this together. Parenting isn’t supposed to be a one-person job after all.”

Nodding and burrowing yourself into the crook of his neck, you appreciate the way his words reminded the devil in the back of your head as it stomps off in defeat. The words supported the angel that finally won and it replaced the red creature, kicking the red light away to replace your body with a calming, soothing feeling that soon takes over your whole body, “I love you, Jae.”

“I love you too.” The warmth of the night overpowered the chilly night and the two of you held each other so lovingly that the weight of your eyelids eventually became too heavy for you to hold. Jaehyun waits patiently until sleep fully takes over you, fighting his yawn from escaping his mouth. Quietly, he just continued to stroke your exposed waist delicately, kissing your lips one last time before reminding you once more, “Always.”

It’s all very fortunate that your mind is now at ease and that you both were able to sleep after. But parenting duties call about half an hour later when cries are heard from the other side of the house and both your eyes open instantly. You were the first one to untangle your body from Jaehyun and you looked over to your husband who was still stirring himself awake again for the second time of the night as you both sat up on the bed, “I’m sorry.” You kiss him on the lips, cradling the back of his head and pushing his chest back down on the bed, “I’ll get her. Get back to sleep, Jae.”

“No no, I’ll go.” You disapprovingly groan at your husband who managed to push his sleepiness aside and sit up once again, his head hanging down in exhaustion, “Wha---bubs.” Instantly, you pushed him back down on the bed, pulling the blanket over up until his chin.

You adamantly tell your husband to try and go back to sleep. Jaehyun fakes his nod and closes his eyes, an idea popping up in his head as he plots to joke around with his wife. When you swing your legs over to the side of the bed, ready to stand up once more, Jaehyun quickly hugs you from behind, pressing a kiss on the back of your ear where you’re the most ticklish and sensitive. 

You froze at his actions and even though his sleepy voice was still evident, you could also hear all the love that he could offer you in this world with his playful tone, “Race you there, bubs.”

Jaehyun called in sick the next day.

navi/masterlist!!

tags (send a dm/ask if you would like to be here!): @deoboyznet 📢❤️ @k-labels 💙🤍 @k-films 🤎🎞️

#deoboyznet #k-labels #k-films #hyunjae x reader #hyunjae the boyz #lee hyunjae x reader #hyunjae fanfic #tbz hyunjae #the boyz #hyunjae fluff #hyunjae angst #the boyz x reader #hyunjae imagines #the boyz x you #hyunjae tbz #the boyz fanfic #tbz #the boyz imagines #jacob bae #younghoon #hyunjae #lee jaehyun #tbz x reader #tbz imagines #tbz scenarios #tbz angst #tbz fluff #tbz fanfic #the boyz angst #the boyz fluff

[lovesickheize]

in front of the river ⊹ ࣪. ｡༻

lee juyeon (the boyz) x gn!reader angst

they met in front of the river.

he stayed there forever.

⊱ ─────────ஓ๑♡๑ஓ ───────── ⊰

wc: 1110

tw: uhhhh all my fics are kind of triggering, but i dont think this is as bad as the other two,, the only thing that could be considered triggering is the mention of a suicide, but there aren't any details about it.

he was sitting on your bench.

your. bench.

it wasn't yours, but it was yours. the place you visited whenever life didnt treat you well. the past few months had been really hard for you, every day you sank deeper into the anxiety that had been torturing you. so your visits to the bench in front of the river were getting more and more frequent. noone really sat there, which is pretty normal considering it was a single bench in the middle of nowhere in front of old houses and apartments.

so why was he there?

that's what you thought to yourself, staring at the man that was sitting on your bench.

"take a picture, it will last longer." his deep and raspy voice echoed between the not so well-maintained buildings.

"you're sitting on my bench." you replied, refusing to reply with sarcasm. you were too invested in your misery to have energy for that.

he didn't reply. he didn't even turn to look at who had been staring at him. you weighted your options and decided against letting him have his way. he was the intruder after all, that bench was your home in a way.

so you sat next to him, your eyes admiring the reflection of the moon and the stars on the water. "why are you here?" he asked you.

you turned your head to his direction, a confused look on your face. "i come here often." you answered, not wanting to start a conversation, just trying to take in as much of the landscape in front of you as possible. "i know. i've seen you. why do you come here so often?"

it was getting serious. you turned your whole body towards him, hugging your knees that were between you and the boy. "it feels safe. silent and isolated, a great place for bad days." you told him. "why are you here, though?"

"i'm always here." he replied, lifting his arm and pointing at a rooftop with his finger. "i go there on bad days. and i can see you coming here and sitting for hours on this bench with your headphones on and a coke zero next to you. it felt kind of comforting to have someone around that seems like they are on the same page as me. so i decided to come here and wait for you. ask you what's wrong."

your painted with confusion face softened up, after hearing the boy talk. he had a really beautiful voice. "i'm juyeon." he murmured.

"y/n." you whispered back.

"can you take me there?" you continued, your eyes on his. he stood up, taking your hand in his and intertwining his fingers with yours. it didn't feel weird. it made you feel,, safe?

you followed him, your jacket and coke on your other hand. you noticed there were no stairs to actually get on the rooftop and paused. "wait, how do we get there?". "just trust me." the boy you now knew was named juyeon told you.

he unlocked the door of the building and showed you the stairs, chuckling at your weirded out face. "hey don't judge me, i'm not the person who decided to hide the key under the doormat!". he said, while placing the key where he found it.

you laughed at his words. his hand made its way to your mouth in seconds, "shhhh, what if they hear us?". you nodded and he removed his hand from your face. he ran to the stairs, dragging you with him and suddenly you found yourself on the rooftop.

the black haired boy walked to the other side of the rooftop, jumping above the short walls that separated the buildings. he helped you get over them and the two of you found the perfect spot on the next building's rooftop. he took of his jacket and put it on the concrete, patting it for you to sit on.

"put yours on, it's going to get cold soon." he whispered and looked at the river, avoiding eye contact with you. you smiled at how thoughtful he seemed, even though he was practically a stranger. you did as told, sitting on the jacket that was carefully placed on the floor with your back resting on a concrete cube that was probably someone's attic.

juyeon turned around and sat next to you, his eyes never meeting yours. "it's beautiful." you said, your voice so low that it almost seemed broken. a couple of tears ran down your cheek, your tiny whine audible in the complete silence for the the boy next to you to hear it.

juyeon looked at the tears escaping your eyes, his hands going on your face to dry them before he realised it. you looked at him completely taken aback, melting into the boy's touch, as you felt his hands cupping your face and his attention being fully on your tears. now it was your turn to look into his eyes, trying to read his soul. unconsciously you leaned in, until your lips were on his. he didn't pull back, giving in the subtle movement of your lips.

the kiss was slow and passionate. something about kissing the black haired boy on a rooftop under the stars made you feel less dead inside.

the kiss was followed by subtle touches, both of you exploring each other's bodies under the dim light of the moon.

you don't remember how you fell asleep, but you woke up just when the sun was noticeable but not enough to indicate it's the next day. juyeon wasn't there, but his jacket was. you got up and looked around, not seeing any trace of him around.

a sudden feeling of sadness took over your body. you removed your own jacket and put on his black one, leaving yours on that spot. maybe him finding it would give him a reason to come meet you again and take his back.

you never saw juyeon again. it was like he stole your firsts and left you, but it didn't really feel like he left you. even though you knew him for a day -or like,, a night- it felt like you knew him for years.

you still visited your bench quite often, since life hadn't gotten any better. sometimes you even went on his rooftop, always getting a very deep feeling in your whole body that you couldn't explain.

as you were walking down the one-way street to reach your bench a couple days later, you caught a sentence of the radio show playing in a car that was waiting for the traffic light to turn green.

"the black haired boy that was found dead in the river remains unident–"

#tbz #the boyz #deobi #juyeon #lee juyeon #younghoon #hyunjae #sangyeon #jacob bae #changmin #chanhee #kevin #haknyeon #sunwoo #eric sohn #theb #the boyz fanfic #the boyz smut #the boyz fluff #the boyz angst #the boyz fan fiction #the boyz oneshot #the boyz imagine #Spotify

[itsbeeble]

Merry Bad Ending

Summary: He'd been sent to protect you, to guide you, and keep you on the path the fates had set for you. He knew he couldn't get involved with you, it went against everything he was taught. But he can't help it, can't help but love you no matter the consequences.

Genre: Angst, fluff, Guardian Angel!au, Soulmate!au

Pairing: Lee Hyunjae x fem!reader (feat. oc, Eric, Sunwoo, Sangyeon, and I think that's it)

WC: 8.5k (I'm sorry)

WARNINGS UNDER THE CUT

Warnings: mentions of religion (mainly Christianity); hurt and kinda comfort; age gap (I'm sorry. Reader will be 24 and Hyunjae will appear 25 but is actually a couple thousand years old); major character death; illness; honestly there isn’t a ton of romance it’s just kinda sad (there will still be some); mentions of death; violence; minor injuries; threats of death (Hyunjae gets violent); illness (LOTS OF IT); alcohol mentions and consumption; Idk let me know if I missed something; brief mentions of kind of bad home life; rude friends; swearing; MINORS DNI 18+

Listen to Merry Bad Ending by The Boyz if you want idk

A/N: yall i'm sorry this took so long and I'm sorry if it isn't my best work. I didn't really wanna do anything too romantic for this one, so there's no spice this time bjghsugs. I hope you enjoy it either way!

~

Hyunjae remembered when he was first assigned to you. You were both young—  at least, you were. You’d been seven at the time, young, curious, and ready to learn about all the cruel things the world could throw at you. He’d appeared to you in the form of a 25-year-old man. Tall, fluffy brown hair, and a pretty face. He looked so young, and he enjoyed the attention that was drawn to him. He enjoyed seeing the human population watch this young man walk by in black clothes, soaked by the rain as if he hadn’t a care in the world. They weren’t aware of who he was. They didn’t know that he couldn’t feel the cold, couldn’t get sick from the rain that was slowly falling from the clouds above them. It always rained when a Guardian began their assignment. Some religions take the rain as a sign that God is angry with them, but only a few know the truth. 

This storm is a goodbye, as the angels will not see their Father or their brethren for a long time. Not until their assignment is fulfilled. Nobody knows where they will be until they are finished. No one except for their Father. Hyunjae hadn’t seen his brother, Sangyeon, in over 600 years. He has no idea where he is, and no idea if he is alive. All he knows is that he is assigned to a bloodline and that he has to care for them all until there is no one left. That can take anywhere from 100 to 1,000 years. 

A crack of thunder overhead. 

Children run to their yelling parents as rain begins to pour down. 

He walks slowly, watching you in your little violet jacket and black rain boots. You sit on the mulch, playing with trucks and ignoring the way your little body is shaking from the cold. Hyunjae sniffs, pushing his sopping wet hair behind his ear as he opens the umbrella in his hand and holds it over you. You don’t notice at first, so focused on that old, yellow toy truck that was covered in stains and rain and all sorts of things that would have your parents yelling for you to put the toy down and play on the swings. 

Parents. That’s right. Your parents. They should be here with you, why aren’t they here with you?

“Who are you?” You’re looking at him now, big eyes full of curiosity and caution. Good. Your parents at least taught you not to trust strangers you meet on the street. 

Hyunjae takes a moment to think. Should he introduce himself yet? Should he tell you his human name or the name his Father gave him?

“My name is Hyunjae,” he flashes a smile at you. Angelic, stunning, everything an angel should be. Your mouth parts in awe. That dopey little lip part that children get when they’re stunned by something. “What are you doing out here all on your own, little bug?”

“I’m waiting for my mommy. She said she would be here soon!” You smile brightly and continue playing with the truck. Hyunjae frowns. 

“When was that?” You shrug.

“I dunno. Before school.”

“And…when was school?” You scowl at him.

“You sure ask a lot of questions, Mister Hyunjae.” Your lack of trust is amusing. Hyunjae crouches down, making sure that the umbrella stays over your head.

“You don’t ask enough, little bug.”

“Why are you calling me a bug?” You turn towards him finally, crossing your legs and folding your hands neatly on your lap. “Bugs are gross, Mister.” He laughs and you crack a smile. 

“Bugs aren’t gross, silly.” He lifts his arms, his hand palm-side down. When he flips his hand over, there’s a butterfly on his fingers, fluttering its wings and waiting to fly. “At least, not all of them. This butterfly is fairly beautiful, don’t you think?” 

Your eyes are wide with amazement, and he watches you try to do what he did. 

“How did you do that!?” You cry. “That’s so cool!”

“Maybe one day I’ll teach you, little bug.” He pats your head, and you beam at him. The butterfly drifts from his finger, and Hyunjae shifts so you can’t see the small, beautiful creature struggle to reach the large oak tree behind you. 

~

You’re nine now. Two years, and yet somehow he’s never seen your parents. He’s watched every day as you leave your house and trudge down the busy sidewalk to get to your school two miles away. He walks where no one can see him except you, and he watches you look at him out of the corner of your eyes. Hyunjae sees the curiosity and the annoyance whenever you see him, and it couldn’t make him more amused. 

“Why are you always following me?” You ask him one day. He’s standing beside you while you swing, giving you a little push here and there. People can see him now, and the mothers are cooing about what a nice young man, playing with his niece. He rolls his eyes at them. 

“I’m not following you. You just happen to be going everywhere I need to be.”

“Are you sure? And why haven’t you changed at all?” You ask him. He just smiles. “And also, why couldn’t anybody see you when we were at school? I was talking to you and Eric and he thought I was crazy for some reason.” You stop your swing and kick the dirt with a pout. Hyunjae crouches beside you and puts his finger under your chin to lift your head. There are tears in your eyes, and he frowns at that.

“Why are you crying, little bug?” You don’t speak at first, your lip trembling and your eyes shining. Hyunjae lifts his hand, and when he flips it over there’s a butterfly. A monarch, just like the last time. He holds his hand out for you to hold the small insect, but you just start sobbing. The butterfly, now startled, flutters off toward the road. He watches as a car zips by the poor creature, and he doesn’t see it fly away. When he looks back at you, you’re trying to wipe your tears. 

They don’t stop, and he wraps a hand around your shoulders, pulling you in for a tight hug that you find yourself returning. He feels you shaking against him, feels the tears starting to soak into his crisp black button-down shirt.

“Y/N,” he says your name in a quiet yet stern voice. “I can’t help you if you don’t tell me what’s wrong.” You sniffle against his chest and he sighs.

“I don’t wanna die like mommy.” His body goes rigid and you pull away from him. 

“What did you say?” He breathes out. 

“I don’t wa-wanna d-die like m-mommy.” You hiccup and Hyunjae’s eyes become dark with an emotion you haven’t seen before, and he can only pray to his Father that you never have to. 

“You aren’t going to, little bug.” He promises. “Not if I can help it.”

~

That night he speaks to his Father. He finds himself alone in the park, sitting on the same swing you had when you spoke to him. 

I don’t wanna die like mommy. 

You’d been so afraid when you said that, and he couldn’t help the twinge in his heart. Sometimes it was hard to be a Guardian. You weren’t allowed to stop the fate of your assignment. You weren’t allowed to change details. You could only sit and watch and turn your eyes away when things got bad. Most angels turned their emotions off like a switch, only acting as if they cared for their assignments until it was done. 

Hyunjae couldn’t do that. He had promised Sangyeon that, no matter the cost, he wouldn’t turn them off. He intended to keep that promise. 

“You asked to see me.” 

A voice around him. Not in front, or behind, or on either side. It surrounds him as if it was the water in a lake he’d submerged himself in. He flinches at the sound but doesn’t raise his eyes.

“It’s good to see you, Father.” No response, so Hyunjae continues. “Why didn’t you tell me anything about my assignment?”

“You knew everything you needed to know about the girl. Nothing else matters.”

“She’s only a child, and she’s terrified of dying like her mother. How can that be what the fates have intended for her?” Hyunjae keeps his voice level, but his hands are beginning to shake with anger. 

“Are you questioning your abilities to continue this assignment?”

“No, Father.” Hyunjae shakes his head and sighs. “I’m just…I want to understand why you did this.” There’s a warm feeling across his shoulders, and he feels his body beginning to relax. There’s a comfort in his Father’s shadowy embrace, one that he cherishes no matter what he feels for Him. 

“You will understand when you are both ready. For now, proceed as you were. There is still time.” Hyunjae’s eyebrows knit together and he raises his head at last. The warm embrace has vanished, along with the overwhelming presence that had accompanied it. 

“The hell do you mean there’s still time?” He mutters, rising to his feet and taking a few steps forward. “Time for what?”

~

Hyunjae watches as you celebrate your sixteenth birthday with a few of your close friends. There’s a smile on your face while you cut the cake and open presents, but he can see something weighing on you. He can see the emotions rolling off of you in waves, even when you smile brightly at him. 

A storm rages outside your house, and Hyunjae can only imagine what is happening in the heavens above him.

“Are you two dating?” He hears one of your friends ask, but you vehemently deny it. You claim that he’s far too old for you, that he’s just a family friend that’s in town for a while. One of your friends side-eyes him and he raises an eyebrow. He does admit that, in his black attire, he does look mildly intimidating. He understands where she’s coming from and why she’d be suspicious of him. 

Hyunjae doesn’t acknowledge her otherwise, keeping his narrowed eyes on you for the rest of the night. As a Guardian, he should be able to gauge some idea of what you’re thinking and feeling. He should be able to gauge your health status, whether you’re sick or not. He senses nothing from you. 

He senses nothing and that’s terrifying.

“You okay, man?” Eric is beside him, gazing curiously at the older man that he’s almost positive hasn’t aged a day in seven years. He’s the same height, has the same broad shoulders and chiseled jaw, and his eyes haven’t formed the wrinkled lines many 30-something-year-olds have. He still has that smooth, unblemished skin that looks perfect always.

“I’m fine,” Hyunjae tilts his head to the side, gazing at the younger boy. He eyes the little acne scars on the young boy's face, the dried strands of his bleached hair, and the lankiness of his limbs. He knows the boy will grow into himself. He knows the fate of nearly everyone in this room, save for you. Guardians can’t know their assignment’s fate. They can only guide them down the path they deem correct. Everyone else, though? Their fates are open for practically everyone to see. 

Eric, for example, falls into a downward spiral when he’s twenty-five. Mental health is his downfall, and he never recovers. 

The girl that gave him a dirty look won’t make it past her second year of college. Poor child.

“What’s your skincare routine?” Eric blurts out suddenly, and Hyunjae raises an eyebrow. “I just— your skin is really smooth and I really just want to know what your routine is. I have a lot of, uh, blemishes?” The more Hyunjae looks at the young boy, the more nervous Eric seems to get. Hyunjae smiles at this, smiles knowing that he is, in fact, superior to the human race in more ways than deemed important. 

“Just basic cleansers, some moisturizer. Face mask here and there.” Eric nods quickly, foolheartedly believing the lie, and Hyunjae can practically see him making a list of things he needs. 

“Thanks, man. I appreciate it.” Eric claps Hyunjae on the shoulder, grimacing at the solid impact and the pain that shot up his wrist. “Maybe I should get your gym routine, too. Shit, you’re built like a goddamn brick wall.”

“You shouldn’t swear too much,” Hyunjae sniffs and kicks himself off the wall. “Never know who might be watching over you.”

~

When your friends leave, you finally allow yourself to sit, and Hyunjae watches as you put your head in your hand and just sit at the small dining room table. The small waves of emotion are becoming tsunamis, and though he can’t tell exactly what you’re feeling, he knows that you’re upset by something. He knows that there’s something wrong, something that he can’t figure out. 

“Little bug,” he sits down next to you, his large frame practically dwarfing yours. “Can I tell you a story?”

You look at him, your eyes heavy with emotion. You try to smile, but he can see how difficult it is and places a hand on your shoulder. 

“You heard of God, and of Adam and Eve, and Lucifer, and all of them. You’ve heard the Bible stories and learned of the angels that fought against the demons.” You nod and he proceeds. “Have you heard of the angels that stood alongside them? Not the ones that were deemed threats, or ones that everyone could see. Ones that protected them, and guided them along their fated paths.”

“What, guardian angels?” Your eyes are curious again and he smiles. “I mean, I’ve heard people talk about them but I’ve never seen them in Bible stories or anything like that.”

“That’s because they aren’t in the Bible,” Hyunjae explains. “God made it clear from the start that these Guardians weren’t to inform their…people of their existence. Guardians were to play alongside the children, befriend the adults, and take the form of whatever they found their people needed.”

“If they weren’t supposed to be common knowledge, why do you know so much about them?” You ask, and Hyunjae shrugs. “And why are you telling me this?”

“Such a curious little bug,” he nudges you and you crack a smile. A real, beautiful smile that warms every inch of his body. “I’m telling you this because I want you to know that even if it doesn’t feel like it, there is somebody watching over you. Someone is here to protect you, keep you safe, and ensure that you’re happy, even if it doesn’t feel like it sometimes. I want you to know that maybe your guardian angel is closer than you think, lingering out of the corner of your eye. Just out of sight when you turn your head.” 

From his pocket, he pulls out a little box wrapped in violet paper. There’s a bow on the top, black and satiny. Your eyes widen when he places the box in your palm and squeezes your shoulder. 

“Open it.”

“You didn’t have to, Hyunjae…” He just shrugs. 

“No, I didn’t. But I did.” You smile and gently do your best not to rip the delicate wrapping paper while opening your gift. Despite your efforts, Hyunjae watches you wince at the small tear in the paper. 

“You don’t have to be so careful,” he tells you, “it’s just paper.” You shake your head.

“Purple is my favorite color, you should know this by now Jae.” He just sits back against the couch cushion and lets you open the jewelry box he’d gotten you. You look back at him with a confused pout and he just gestures for you to open it. 

A necklace. Thin silver chain, and a pendant attached. 

A butterfly made of delicately crafted wings. There are jewels attached to the butterfly, creating the wings and the eyes. 

“Diamonds?” Your eyes narrow and he feels his heart sink a bit. Did you hate it? “Jae, how did you afford this?”

“Call it a family heirloom,” he lies. “My mother’s.”

“Your mother had a brand new diamond necklace just hanging around the house, and you gave it to me instead of giving it to your girlfriend?” You turn fully toward him and scowl. “Lee Hyunjae you shouldn’t have gotten me a gift so expensive.”

“Why not?” He challenges.

“I’m not worth this much!” It’s his turn to scowl.

“You know that’s not true, little bug. You’re worth far more than you know.”

~

Hyunjae hovers over your shoulder, watching you bite at your nails while you write your essay.

“I still don’t understand why colleges make you write these things.” His fingers wrap around the back of your chair and you roll your neck. Your head brushes against his abdomen and you flinch away. 

“They want to know about us, what makes us good candidates. Now can you read this and make sure it sounds like a sob story?” He rolls his eyes when you push him into the chair and take his position. 

You’d written about your mom. About how she got sick when you were little, and about how your dad was basically never there. You wrote about how you would walk yourself to school every day, and walk yourself to the nearby park until your sick mother could get you. Often, you would be at the park until the sun went down and the street lights would come on. 

“This is sad,” Hyunjae takes a pause and your eyes shoot to him nervously.

“Good sad or bad sad?”

“Good. Let me finish reading.” You nod and he turns back to the computer screen. 

Halfway through the essay, he sees something familiar. 

You’d written about him. About how he helped you stay alive through those hard times. How he, this mysterious man that claimed to be a family friend, was the only consistent person in your life. How he helped you grow into the woman that he’d convinced you was real, and that you didn’t have to struggle through life on your own.

“You called me your guardian angel?” His lips twitch into a smile and you laugh nervously. 

“I— I just meant that— that you were always there for me, y’know?” You spit out quickly. “You kept me on the right path, even when I started going astray.” Hyunjae’s smile grows and he lifts himself out of the chair. 

“Little bug, I didn’t do anything. Every choice you made, every path you chose, that was you. I was just a bit of moral support,” he denies, even though he knows you’re right. Although, you don’t need to know that he’s literally your guardian angel. You don’t need to know that yes, he was guiding you through the motions. He kept your boat from capsizing from even the most dangerous waves. 

He can’t take all the credit for your success, even when it was due. 

Still, you squeeze his shoulder and place your chin on his shoulder while he reads. His hands are beginning to shake, and he isn’t quite sure why. 

“What do you think?” You ask, and he feels your breath brushing against his ear. His skin grows warm. 

“I think it’s very well done.” He starts to rise from the chair and you take a few steps back, sitting on the mattress of your bed. He crosses his arms, steeling his body so you can’t see the shaking of his hands, the sweat on his neck. “I think these colleges would be foolish to not accept you.”

“You think so?” You’re hopeful, and he smiles, walking toward you until he’s hardly a foot away from you.

“I know so, little bug.” Your body goes rigid when you feel his lips against your forehead. Your cheeks go ablaze, the heat spreading down your neck. It’s the first time he’d shown this kind of true affection toward you, and you aren’t quite sure what to do with it. 

He’s still smiling when he pulls back, laughing to himself when he sees your stunned expression.

“You keep working, I’ll go make some food.”

~

You were twenty-one when Hyunjae finally gave up on stopping you from going to parties. For years he’d forced you to stay home, to “not waste your time getting shit-faced with a bunch of nobodies who couldn’t give less of a shit about you”. He’d caught you a number of times when you tried to sneak out the window of your dorm room, sitting in the tree you were going to climb down in a flimsy skirt and some heels. He’d stopped you from sneaking out the main doors by waking your RA. Anything you could think of trying, he somehow already knew and was prepared to stop you.

“I’m just keeping you safe,” he’d say with a smirk and a shrug. “Besides, you won’t have to sneak out in a couple of years. Just hold off a little longer, focus on your studies, and hang out with your friends at a cafe or something.”

“What am I supposed to say when they ask me why I keep ditching them?” You stomp your foot, and Hyunjae raises an eyebrow. 

“Tell them your guardian angel said no.” You think he’s kidding, that he isn’t taking you seriously, and that he’s mocking you. He isn’t, and he wishes he could tell you that but he could be killed.

When he finally does let you go, he comes with you and Eric, playing along as your chauffeur and as a guest. You’re a bit too excited, and Eric has to calm you down before Hyunjae puts the car in park. He can see you looking at him out of the corner of your eye, eyeing him up and down. He’s smirking. It isn’t as if he’s dressed up, at least no more than he usually is. A white tee shirt, a leather jacket that’s been left unzipped, some black pants, and black boots. No change from his usual colors, just a bit more style to fit in more with the college kids. 

Nobody would question a 25-year-old at a college party. Half the men in the frat were nearing that age anyway, and Hyunjae’s lip curled in disgust when he saw one chatting up a freshman, just barely out of high school. 

He feels your arm looping through his, and his gaze turns back to you. You’re talking with Eric, and he sees your arm also looped through his. You want to keep them both close, at least for a while. Hyunjae’s eyes narrowed at the young boy. Since high school, he’s put on some muscle and cleaned up the acne he’d been so worried about. He’d have no problem finding someone to settle down with, and he knows the Guardian watching over Eric is pleased with this.

“…don’t you think, Jae?” You look up at him expectantly, your eyes glittering with excitement. You don’t know he has no idea what you said, and he doesn’t plan on you finding out so he smiles and nods.

“Sure thing, little bug.” 

The music is overwhelmingly loud. Not nearly the loudest party he’d had to attend, but nonetheless he hated every second he was in the disgusting house. You and Eric had peeled off in another direction, somewhere across the room and he was on the landing, leaning on the banister with a half-empty red cup in one of his hands. Every time he takes a sip from the plastic cup, he grimaces at the disgusting taste. Human alcohol had become more and more disgusting as the years dragged on. Every time he was dragged to an event, such as this one, he prayed to his father that the drinks wouldn’t get any worse. And, every time, his prayers went unanswered. 

“Hey,” a girl appears at his side and he doesn’t even spare her a glance. “What’s a handsome man like yourself doing at a party like this?” She’s too close for comfort, her clothing too revealing for his taste. He scoffs, ignoring her. She keeps talking. “You seem a bit too old to be going to lame frat parties. Shouldn’t you be at a bar or at a club?” Now he looks at her, his eyebrow raised. She smiles, her lips colored ruby red and her eyes flashing with mischief. 

“I go to the university.”

“My point still stands.” He sighs, returning to leaning over the banister. You’re talking with a man now, and he picks up bits of your conversation. 

My name’s Sunwoo.

Y/N.

What’s a pretty girl like yourself doing at a party like this?

Humans, similarly to their drinks, get less and less creative with time. Recycling the same useless tactics over and over again until someone is desperate enough to fall for it. 

Sunwoo twirls a piece of your hair around your finger, and Hyunjae’s teeth grind together at the way you swoon. Of course, you would be one to fall for the stupid comments and greetings. Of course.

“You seem awfully close to that girl.” Hyunjae rolls his eyes.

“What’s it to you?”

“You should be careful.” Her finger is trailing down his arm now. “You never know what sort of evil will catch up with the two of you.” His body goes rigid and his head snaps to the side. 

Her eyes are boring into his, red meeting gold. She’s still smiling, her hand still trailing up and down his arm. Hyunjae bites down on his tongue, rising to stand straight. 

“What are you doing here?” He hisses. The demon beside him just continues to smile. 

“I’m a warning. Someone sent me to warn you, Guardian.”

“Who sent you?” He yanks his arm out of her grasp, and she sighs. 

“I can’t tell you that, Guardian. But you should be careful. They’re watching, waiting. Soon enough, they will take one of you. They don’t care which.” The demon begins to back up, and Hyunjae follows. To anyone around, it may look like she’s seducing him. Bringing him to one of the bedrooms upstairs. 

“Why should I believe you?” 

“Your brother did.” She shrugs and Hyunjae’s breath hitches. “In fact, he sends his regards from his assignment. The man he was assigned to recently got married and his wife is now pregnant. You should be proud of them.”

“Why do you know Sangyeon?” 

“I told you, I’m just here to warn you.” 

She’s gone before he can respond, disappearing into the crowd and no matter how he strains his neck, he can’t spot her anymore. But he sees you. You’re alone now, and Sunwoo seems to have found a new interest in a pretty girl by the “bar”. He walks over to you, shoving through the crowd and ignoring those who snap at him. 

When your eyes lock on his, that warm feeling returns to his chest. All thoughts of the demon have disappeared, and now his mind is consumed by you. Protecting you, caring for you, being with you, having you. 

“Jae?” Your voice is soft, barely audible even with his superior hearing. Your eyes are wide, staring up at him. Your hand is wrapped around his jacket, holding tightly. “Is everything okay?” He isn’t sure what comes over him. Maybe it’s the thought of someone hurting you. The thought of losing you. Maybe he’s scared of failing his assignment. Maybe he’s scared of failing you. He isn’t sure, but whatever it is has him drawing to him, his hand tilting your head up. He can hear and feel your heart beginning to pound. Hyunjae feels your grip on his jacket tighten, feels you beginning to stand on your toes. 

You’re inches away from him, the two of you tucked into a darker corner of the party with not a soul watching the two of you. His hand is still loosely gripping your chin, the other holding your waist. Your skin is warm to the touch, almost too warm. He watches your eyes, the way they begin to flutter shut and the way you almost seem to lean into him. 

His lips brush against your forehead, and you flinch against his touch. He goes to pull back but you keep him close, holding him against you. The two of you don’t move for a while. You just stand in that corner, holding each other as if you’re afraid the other will let go too soon.

~

You were just barely starting your third year of college when it happened. Just barely starting to live when your life was ripped out of your hands. 

See, the thing about illnesses is that sometimes they take time. Sometimes they are slow acting, and you don’t see them until late in the victim’s life. Sometimes, if you’re lucky, you don’t get symptoms at all and are able to pass away peacefully. Sometimes those slow-acting illnesses begin to show, but treatments work quickly and they’re able to be stopped. 

But sometimes, on certain occasions, that isn’t the case. Sometimes illness strikes out of nowhere, sinking its teeth into the nearest unsuspecting victim. It latches on, feating until there is nothing left but a shell of the person that once was. 

You were linked up to monitors, needles sticking in your arms, and a number of nurses and doctors standing around your bedside. 

Unconscious.

That’s how Hyunjae found you. You were unconscious, and your skin was pale. Your eyes were sunken in. A doctor tries to make him leave, but there was something in the Guardian’s eyes that had the older man stumbling over his words and averting his eyes. 

It was a look of unfathomable rage. Like he had more power inside him, and such contempt for the world that he could cause more damage than the wrath of God. 

Hyunjae walked forward, pushing past the nurses trying to protest. In the reflection of one of the monitors, he could see his eyes. They were gold. Not just little flecks, not a shade of yellow that televisions tried to excuse as gold, but pure, vibrant gold. The anger in them darkened them, but anyone who looked into this man’s eyes was struck with awe. With amazement, confusion, and horror when they, past the screaming voices in their mind that told them death was imminent, realized how much danger they were in.

“What happened to her?” The doctor behind Hyunjae stuttered over his words again, and Hyunjae turns around. When he spoke again, it was as if there were millions of voices speaking all at once, overwhelming the medical professionals. “What. Happened. To. Her.”

“We…we aren’t sure yet,” the doctor breathed out, lowering his gaze to the floor. “It— she was brought here by a young man. He said that she collapsed in the middle of a presentation. It could be nothing, we just want to make sure.”

“If it was nothing,” Hyunjae hissed out and there was a swell of triumph when he sees the fear in the doctor’s eyes, “she would not be here, would she?”

“N-No, sir, I suppose not.” The doctor whimpered. 

“Fix her.” The order was clear, and the doctor knew without saying that his next phrase was not a threat, but a promise. “Fix her, or I swear on thy God that I will kill each and every last one of you. I will kill you, and I will kill your families, and I will kill anyone that you have even passed on the street if that’s what it takes for you to comprehend the importance of this.”

“Calm yourself, Hyunjae.” A hand on his shoulder, and he feels something inside of him jolt. His heart, maybe. He can feel it beginning to pound, can feel his lungs empty of air. “We don’t need any accidents today.”

For a moment, he just stands there frozen. He doesn’t know if he should turn around. Doesn’t know if he should react positively or negatively. Hyunjae’s heart is pounding, and for that moment he stands frozen, the fear and the anger begin to kick in.

“Sangyeon,” Hyunjae breathes out. His brother is smiling when he turns around. He’s smiling, and healthy, and he’s alive. “You’re…you’re here? But— but how did you— how are you—”

The doctors have left the room, and he can hear them whispering amongst each other. They’re debating calling the police, or just leaving him be. Someone picks up a phone, and Sangyeon pulls Hyunjae to the side, ducking into an empty hospital room and shutting the door. 

“How are you here?” Hyunjae hisses, pushing his brother back against the wall. There’s pain in his voice. Fear, even. There’s no possible way that Sangyeon could have found him. Guardians can’t track each other. They have no way of finding each other when on assignments. 

“You have to know the truth.” Sangyeon doesn’t push his younger brother away, just lets himself be shoved against the wall with a strong hand digging into his chest. Something warm is beginning to burn against his skin, and he bites down on his tongue to numb the pain. “Someone had to tell you, and it wasn’t going to be our Father.”

“What are you talking about?” Hyunjae pulls his hand away when smoke begins to rise from under his palm, tightening his hand into a fist to cool himself off. “What truth?”

“About this assignment. Didn’t she warn you?” The door behind them opens and closes, and Hyunjae whips around. His hands are glowing, radiating with heat that begins the catch on the fabric of the bed next to him. The woman— the demon he’d met just a year prior stands with her body leaning against the wall. She’s dressed in a nurse’s garb, his lips curled into that same smirk that he’d dreaded. 

“I tried, but your father must be a very convincing man.” Sangyeon smiles sadly, beckoning for her to join him. She tucks herself under his arm, practically wrapping her body around him. A lump is forming in Hyunjae’s throat, and his vision beginning to swim. 

“What the hell is going on?” Sangyeon frowns, taking a step toward his younger brother. Hyunjae takes a step back. “Why are you…brother, why are you with this creature?” The demon scoffs. 

“Creature? I would hardly call myself a creature, you stupid Guardian—”

“Hye-Ri,” Sangyeon interrupts, “that’s enough. Let me talk.” Hye-Ri’s lips purse and she takes a small step back. The older angel sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose. “Jae, I need you to listen to me very carefully. Everything Father has told you up until now has been a lie.” Hyunjae bites his tongue, fighting the urge to argue with his brother. He might not believe Sangyeon, but he will not disrespect his brother. “He’s told you that this is just an assignment, that you need to guide her down the right path until she passes, is that correct?”

“Yes.” He keeps his response short and Sangyeon nods.

“He lied. This isn’t an assignment. This is a slaughter.”

“What are you talking about?” Hyunjae asks. “A slaughter?”

“Her mother wasn’t supposed to die,” Hye-Ri informs him, and his eyes narrow on her. “Sangyeon here was the woman’s guardian. She was supposed to live a long, fruitful life, but your Father fed her a disease. An angelic disease.”

“The same one Y/N has now.” Sangyeon nods and Hyunjae exhales heavily. “You said this was a slaughter?”

“Y/N is…different from what you’re used to. I’m sure you’ve noticed that you can’t get a reading on her. That you can’t quite understand her like you can other people.” Hyunjae just nods, and Sangyeon continues. “That’s because she’s a Link.”

“A what?” 

“Think of Links as soulmates,” Hye-Ri explains. “Links basically latch onto an angel, guardian or not, and link them to the human realm. Not a very creative name, but it does the trick.”

“Stay on track, Hye-Ri.”

“Right,” the demon nods, “your Father isn’t sure where it started, or with whom, but he intends to wipe out any and all links he can find.”

“But…but why does he need to do that? I mean…it can’t be dangerous to have a— a soulmate, as you called them.” Hyunjae gnaws on his lip, folding his arms over his chest.

“Father has never truly loved the human race as he claimed he did,” Sangyeon says. “He despises how we, the Guardians, grow close to them. How we grow attached to them. He fears another rebellion, should one grow too close to an assignment. He fears that the Links will be the very root of his angels betraying him. That his angels and these Links will produce heirs that are powerful enough to take down even himself.”

“So Y/N…” Hyunjae’s voice is trembling more than he’d like to admit. “She’s my…she’s my Link? My soulmate?” He receives a sad nod from his brother and tilts his head back to look at the ceiling. 

“Father saw you growing attached. He knew that it would only be a matter of time before you began to break the rules he’d set in stone.”

“But I haven’t…I haven’t done anything. I’ve kept myself under control, nothing has happened!” Hyunjae protests. “It isn’t fair to me, and it isn’t fair to her.”

“I know.” Sangyeon wraps his arms around his younger brother, feeling Hyunjae’s body shake with rage and fear, and pain. “I know, little brother.”

~

A crack of thunder shakes the building, and the pounding of rain fills the awful silence of the hospital. It’s surprisingly quiet for this time of day, but nobody would ever say that out loud. 

Hyunjae is in your hospital room again, his head lowered and his foot tapping against the ground. A nurse enters the room, flinching when she sees him. Her body remains tense the entire time she takes your vitals. 

“Is she getting better?” He asks before the nurse leaves. There’s a moment of silence before he looks up at her. She looks afraid, but there’s sadness in her eyes.

“No. She’s not.”

The door shuts again and Hyunjae lowers his head back down. The beeping of machines begins to overwhelm him. It’s constant, and he begins to wonder if you can hear it too. If you can hear what’s going on around if you’re screaming for someone to hear you and see you and listen to you. 

When the door opens again, he knows who it is.

“Have you been here the whole time?” Eric is breathless, his voice hoarse and strained. 

“I have,” comes Hyunjae’s monotone response. 

“Has she woken at all?”

“No.” Hyunjae looks up again, resting his face against his laced fingers. “No, she’s comatose right now.” Eric’s face twists with pain, and Hyunjae barely flinches when the young boy’s hand collides with the concrete wall. There’s an ugly crunch, and he watches Eric bite back a scream. His knuckles are now bleeding, and his hand already going from red to purple. 

“Fuck.” The boy hisses quietly, cradling his fist to his chest. Hyunjae scoffs out a laugh.

“That was idiotic.”

“I know.” Eric sits beside the Guardian, squeezing his eyes shut and willing away the pain. Hyunjae eyes the bloodied and bruised fingers and rolls his eyes. 

“Give me your hand.” Hyunjae holds out his own hand, palm facing up, and Eric shoots him a look.

“No offense, you’re hot and all, but I’m not into you.” Hyunjae bites his tongue again and continues to hold out his hand.

“I’m not into you either. Glad we’re on the same page. Give. Me. Your. Hand.” Eric slowly stretches his arm out, placing his fist into Hyunjae’s outstretched palm. There’s a soft glow and a few cracking sounds. Eric’s face goes pale, watching his fingers snap into place as if they had never broken. The blood remains on his fingers, and he wipes them with a tissue.

“How the fuck did you do that?” Eric asks, gazing at his fixed hand in amazement.

“I have a number of tricks up my sleeve, kid.”

“Is this the same thing that keeps you from aging?” Hyunjae hesitates before he responds. “And don’t try lying to me. I’m not dumb. At first I just thought your skincare was hella good, but after twelve years of you not aging past twenty-five it kinda gets obvious that there’s something up.”

“You’re not afraid?” Hyunjae asks curiously. Eric shrugs.

“Unless you think I should be, not really. You’ve protected Y/N our whole lives, you’ve done nothing to make me think I shouldn’t trust you. I don’t know who or what you are, but I trust you.”

“Interesting.” Hyunjae sits back in his chair, leaning his head against the wall. “So if I told you I was her guardian angel, you’d believe me?”

“I mean…I guess?” Eric shrugs. “Unless, for some reason, that’s a lie?”

“No, it isn’t. And this isn’t a human disease.”

“What do you mean it isn’t a human disease? Like…this is from Heaven?”

“Mhm. Given to her directly by Father dearest to spite me.” Eric’s jaw drops open a bit.

“God wants to kill my best friend?”

“You pick up on things fast.” His head snaps to the side and he hears Eric hiss in pain. When Hyunjae turns his head back, Eric is sitting quietly, eyes trained on his best friend. “Are you glad you did that? Did that make you feel better?”

“Yeah, a little bit. Keep talking.”

“She’s what we call a Link. She is, essentially, my soulmate.”

“Ew, age gap much?” Hyunjae snorts, his lips curling into a smile. He’d expected Eric to be less accepting of all of this, but apparently, he’d underestimated the boy. 

“My Father, God as you call him, doesn’t necessarily approve of Links. He wants to eradicate them all. He gives them diseases, angelic diseases that have no cure in any world. Not in Heaven, not in Hell, and certainly not here. Any medications given are just prolonging the inevitable.”

“So…She’s just…gonna die?” Eric asks, and Hyunjae gives him a pitiful look. “Is there anything that you can do? You’re her soulmate, there’s gotta be something. True love’s kiss?” The Guardian shakes his head and Eric lets out a shaky sigh. 

“My brother is…trying to find something. Anything that can help her. We just have to be patient.”

He isn’t entirely sure who he’s trying to convince, himself or Eric or both. He knows that these attempts are futile. He knows that he can’t save you like he’d promised you so long ago. 

I don’t want to die like my mommy.

I won’t let that happen.

~

“We need to consider that she might not wake up.” Hyunjae stares down at the doctor, his hands shaking and his eyes narrowed. “It’s…it’s been two years, sir.”

“I don’t give a damn how long it’s been,” Hyunjae snarls, standing over your comatose form. Protecting you. “We aren’t pulling this plug. Not now, not ever. Do you understand me, Doctor?”

“Sir,” the older gentleman tries to plead, “I understand your frustration but… you need to face that she would be better off just…going on her own terms. Keeping her alive, in this state where she has no control over her bodily functions, where she can’t communicate with us or feel the things that we can, it isn’t good for her or for you.”

He knows the doctor is right. He knows he’s just prolonging the inevitable, he always has. But he can’t let go of you yet. It’s too soon. He hasn’t had enough time with you. Hasn’t had enough time to talk to you, to take care of you, to love you, cherish you, adore you. He hasn’t had time to show you the world, as he’d wanted to for so long. He hadn’t had time to tell you the truth. 

Although, at this point, the truth is…unfortunate. His wings had been stripped from his body, his and his brother’s. His rights as a Guardian have been removed. Anything he could’ve used to save you…there’s nothing left. He has Fallen, but he couldn’t be more proud of it. He doesn’t have to hide himself anymore, doesn’t have to fear the man he once called Father. 

“Hyunjae,” Hye-Ri stands at his side, her eyes tired. “You know the doctor is right.”

“Shut up, Hye-Ri.” The young demon snarls. Hye-Ri doesn’t snap at him this time. She looks sad, almost pitying him. Sangyeon stands at the door, his arms crossed over his chest. “You don’t know what you’re talking about. None of you do.”

“Lee Hyunjae,” Sangyeon says sternly, “use reason. I understand you’re upset, but you need to understand that your soulmate is suffering and that you are being selfish.”

“Am I not allowed to be selfish?” Hyunjae cries. “Even now that I am finally free from God’s hands, am I not allowed to be selfish for once?” Hye-Ri leaves the room, her eyes lowered to the ground. Sangyeon steps forward. Hyunjae moves even closer to you. 

“You are allowed to want things, little brother,” Sangyeon speaks softly, so as not to anger Hyunjae further. “You are allowed to want her. You are allowed to crave more time with her, but you cannot have her like this. You know that.” For a brief moment, Hyunjae wants to scream. He wants to throw the vase of flowers that sits beside your hospital bed, he wants to tear this building down until there’s nothing left but a pile of bricks. 

But he doesn’t. He stands there, gazing down at you and brushing his thumb across your cheek. Your body is cold, and when he touches you, you don’t so much as twitch. His hand drops to his side. 

“Get Eric. Get the doctor.”

~

The first thing you notice when you wake up is the beach in front of you. You’re laying in the sand, water washing up to your ankles. The sun is warm on your skin, but you aren’t sweating. In fact, nothing about your situation is uncomfortable. You’re at peace, more comfortable than you think you’ve ever been.

The second thing you notice is that you’re in nothing but a bathing suit and a beach cover. You don’t remember changing into this. In fact, you can’t seem to remember anything after the party.

“You’re awake,” you turn your head and you begin to smile. Hyunjae is dressed in a simple tee shirt and shorts, two classes and a bottle of champagne clutched in his hands. He’s grinning at you, and you rise to your feet.

“You’re wearing something other than black, I see.” You tease him. He lets out a laugh, and you think it’s the most beautiful thing you’ve ever heard. 

“Hilarious, little bug.” He nudges your side, guiding you to a nearby table with two long beach chairs sitting side-by-side. “Come have a drink with me.” You follow him, the beach cover blowing behind you a bit. Your hair isn’t quite tussled by the wind around you, just brushed over your shoulders. Everything is perfect.

Too perfect.

Hyunjae takes a seat on one of the chairs, gritting his teeth when he removes the top of the champagne bottle. 

“I always get nervous opening these things. Far too dangerous for their own good if you ask me.” You sit beside him, and he side-eyes you. “I got you your own chair.”

“What if I want to sit next to you?” You challenge. He pauses, and for a moment you think he looks…sad. That moment passes quickly, and he’s smiling again and laughing to himself. 

“I won’t stop you then.” He takes one of the glasses and slowly fills it with the bubbling alcohol before passing it to you. You thank him quietly and briefly turn your gaze to the ocean. 

“Have you ever seen water so clear?” You ask, half rhetorical and half curious. He hums.

“Once or twice.”

“I didn’t think Heaven would have beaches this nice.” Silence behind you, and you turn back to Hyunjae, still smiling. He’s staring at you, his body completely frozen. You can see his body shaking, the liquid in his glass sloshing up the sides. You take the glass and the bottle from his hands, setting both on the table beside him. Tears are beginning to wet his cheeks, and you reach forward to wipe them away. 

“I didn’t…I’m so, so sorry little bug.” His voice cracks and the tears keep falling. 

“Jae, you knew it would happen eventually. I did too. That’s just…I just got the shit end of the stick in this life.” You slide closer to him and he lets his eyes close. “Besides, did you really think that I believed you had really good skincare? For almost twenty years?” 

Hyunjae wraps his arms around you tightly, pulling you as close as he possibly could. You let him hold you, you let him whisper his apologies, and his regrets, and his whispers of I love you, I adore you, I’m sorry this happened before I got to show you the world. You just smile, running your fingers through his hair and rubbing his shoulders. 

When he pulls away from you at last, his cheeks are red and stained with tears. You’re still smiling, assuring him that everything is okay. 

“So,” you raise the two glasses of champagne and hand him one, “what are we toasting?” Hyunjae shakes his head, his smile returning.

“Whatever you want, little bug. Anything you want, I will give you.” You hum, kicking your legs a bit and digging your toes into the sand. 

“Anything, you say?” You wiggle your eyebrows and while he laughs, you know that he means every word. You know what he doesn’t have the strength to say yet. I am yours. You are mine. I will cherish you, adore you, and love you how I should have when you were alive. “Fine then.”

“Have you decided?” He turns toward the beach and you do the same, leaning your head on his shoulder briefly. You feel him flinch when you press your lips to his shoulder blade, where you can feel his wings once were. 

“I have.”

“So?”

“To merry bad endings, and to you for going against what you’d been raised to do, for believing in me and in your brother.” Hyunjae smiles, tipping his glass to yours. A small clink echoes across the beach.

“To merry bad endings.”

~

TAGLIST: @hyunjaespresent-deobi @just-here-to-read-01

#itsbeeble #itsbeeble masterlist #kpop #kpop imagines #kpop angst #kpop fluff #the boyz #the boyz x reader #the boyz imagines #the boyz angst #the boyz fluff #the boyz hyunjae #lee hyunjae #lee hyunjae imagines #lee hyunjae x reader #hyunjae x reader #hyunjae imagines

[zzoguri]

UPDATED AS OF SEPTEMBER 14, 2023, 6:30PM (GMT+8)

requests status ➵ slots are closed!

how to request ➵ send an ask following the format: "tbz member + one song from the list + possible scenario you want (not required)" and you will receive! if you're looking for a certain scenario, please be as descriptive as possible! please keep in mind that the song you pick will have a determined genre linked to it.

ex. "jacob + must be love by laufey + possibly reader just doing their own thing and jacob is just admiring, only for this scene playing out to be his realization of him falling in love"

guidelines/reminders ➵ i have every right to deny a request if i believe i cannot fulfill it or if i'm uncomfortable writing it ➵ please don't expect me to be speedy with requests... there is a chance i may not fulfill it LMFAO so don't come into my asks fully expecting smth ➵ most requests will be <10k and will most likely be focused on a certain scenario or two ➵ i will not write yandere or majorly toxic themes! but i will write fluff, suggestive/smut, and angst depending on the song you choose teehee! if you're worried that i may deny your request, just send it and i'll let you know if something about it is something i'm not comfortable to write about ➵ only writing x readers! ➵ requests won't be done on a "first come; first serve" basis!

a/n ➵ happy to announce that i am officially opening requests! yup, i thought that to beat my silly writer's block, i can start doing some requests for the time being. it's also my way of celebrating 200 followers!! i'll be opening limited slots for the time being. however, if i decide that i want to keep doing more requests, i may accept more later on.

song list ➵ and july by heize & dean ➵ apple cider by beabadoobee ➵ apple pie by lizzy mcalpine ➵ arms unfolding by dodie ➵ as long as it takes you by keshi ➵ backburner by niki ➵ bad by wave to earth ➵ bawat piyesa by munimuni ➵ calla by wave to earth ➵ cheese & wine by dpr live ➵ cherry wine by grentperez ➵ chocolate by day6 ➵ clementine by grentperez ➵ cologne by beabadoobee ➵ disconnected by 5sos ➵ everything has changed by taylor swift ft. ed sheeran ➵ hall&oates by yerin baek ➵ i like you by day6 ➵ in what world by lizzy mcalpine ➵ intertwined by dodie ➵ laputa by dpr live ft. crush ➵ let you break my heart again by laufey ➵ loner by yerin baek ➵ lowkey by niki ➵ maps by raffaella & hippo campus ➵ ocean floor by wave to earth ➵ old with you by grentperez ➵ on the drive home by niki ➵ one last time, please by dodie ➵ only by day6 ➵ opposite by sabrina carpenter ➵ pancakes for dinner by lizzy mcalpine ➵ pasilyo by sunkissed lola ➵ paubaya by moira dela torre ➵ pour up by dean ft. zico ➵ put my hands on you by dean & anderson .paak ➵ pwede ba by lola amour ➵ right here by keshi ➵ san francisco by 5sos ➵ second best by laufey ➵ simple season by hippo campus ➵ somebody by keshi ➵ soren by beabadoobee ➵ take off all your cool by sabrina carpenter ➵ text me by dpr live ➵ the 1 by taylor swift ➵ tornado warnings by sabrina carpenter ➵ treacherous by taylor swift ➵ tuesday by hippo campus ➵ valentine by laufey ➵ waste the night by 5sos

#zzoguri works #the boyz #the boyz x reader #tbz #the boyz imagines #the boyz fluff #the boyz scenarios #the boyz angst #the boyz smut #the boyz suggestive #the boyz drabbles #the boyz drabble #the boyz oneshot #the boyz oneshots #the boyz scenario #the boyz imagine #lee sangyeon x reader #jacob bae x reader #kim younghoon x reader #lee hyunjae x reader #lee juyeon x reader #choi chanhee x reader #kevin moon x reader #ji changmin x reader #ju haknyeon x reader #kim sunwoo x reader #eric sohn x reader #sohn youngjae x reader #new x reader #q x reader

[cobiehaven]

Heartbreaker — Kim Sunwoo

SYNOPSIS; sunwoo broke your heart but why does he still act like nothing happened? you dared to ask him but you knew you were going to have to find out the truth at some point, right?

PARING; persistent!sunwoo x heartbroken!reader, ft. changmin !!

GENRE; just angst. only angst. all angst.

WORD COUNT; 2.1k

TAGS/WARNINGS; persistent!sunwoo, heartbroken!reader, depressed!reader, bestie!changmin, caring!changmin, changmin works for door dash LMFAOOO, mention of suicide, reader has a love hate relationship with sunwoo, story with no valid conclusion.

AUTHORS NOTE; i’m not gonna lie- i teared up thinking about how sad this was. im sorry if i didn’t execute it the way that i thought it in my head. i hope you all see the kinds of feelings that im feeling through this story, a lot of them were based on how i felt in my own personal experiences.

you don’t know how long it has been.

how long its been since you looked at your phone or how long its been since you’ve gotten out of bed.

when was the last time you took a shower or made yourself a proper meal? the most you’ve done is probably get up to pee.

but with the lack of nutrition, it was even hard to do that sometimes.

depression was not something to take lightly. everyone knew that. especially if it was mixed in with heartbreak.

it could really mess up somebody.

and that was exactly what you were experiencing.

the same kind of messing up.

to sum up the unfortunate story of your disgusting break up, it was an understatement to say you hated your ex-boyfriend. three weeks ago, he cheated on you. and that was something you were not going to tolerate with when you and him had been in a long-lasting relationship of 2 years. you had gotten sent a picture by someone who had went to the same party as sunwoo, that night. in the picture, he was kissing another girl. you don’t know why you were so surprised, he’s always had people around him all the time. both girls and boys were attracted to him wether it was platonic or not.

you suppose the reason why you feel so broken, is the fact that he always gave you a reason to believe that he would never do such a thing to hurt you.

there was never a time that you felt unloved when you were with him. he always made sure to make time for you even when he, himself, was at his worst. he knew you like you knew the back of your own hand. he knew exactly what you order at all of your favorite restaurants, he knew what your favorite comfort food was when you finished watching a sad movie, he knew just what to do when you stayed home in bed because of how bad your cramps were. he knew what the size of your clothes were and always made sure to get them one size bigger so the both of you could wear them back to back. he always made sure to leave his cologne out on the bedside table so you could give yourself a little spritz of it whenever you missed him more than anyone else. and he always made sure to be there for you when you were having a rough time.

the day you found out he cheated on you, you cried for as long as your exhaustion could take you. when he came home that night, you didn’t have the strength to say much to him. he asked you over and over what was wrong, what he could have possibly done to make you sob to the point of bloodshot eyes.

you told him to get out with no explanation. he knew what he did yet you still don’t know why he acted like he was still innocent.

you dare to ask him about it, though.

once he packed all of his things with you watching from afar, he gave you one last saddened look before locking the door behind him.

those eyes stuck with you. you couldn’t forget the amount of worry and sorrow that was behind them. but even so, you weren’t even sure if you could look at him the same anymore. no matter what he did to try and make up his mistake to you. you could barely even look at your phone without drowning in the anxiety of seeing his face pop up on your lock screen.

suddenly, your thoughts were interrupted when you felt a strong vibration come from your phone, across the bed. you knew exactly who it was and you didn’t dare to look at your phone. but no matter how strong your will was, you gave in to the pure curiosity of what he had to say this time.

sunwoo:

y/n, i know you’re reading these.

please

just respond? let me know how you are

i’m worried.

it’s been weeks

none of your friends have seen you either

i keep asking every day but they know as little as i do

i know i’m the last person you want to talk to and we don’t have to talk about what happened, but please at least say something to let me know you haven’t completely given up.

i know you better than anyone else

you stared at the messages. you contemplated wether to text back or not. although you were curious as to what he had to say, it didn’t delve deep enough for you to bring up the courage to respond.

thank god your read receipts weren’t on.

putting down your phone again, you sighed and rolled over. you had forgotten to check the time but you were certain it was at least mid-day by now. everyday around this time, you battled with yourself to get up and do something productive. but your lack of motivation won every time.

luckily, today didn’t feel as bad as the others. usually you would be swimming in exhaustion.

you silently dragged yourself out of bed, using the little strength you had to rake through your heavily knotted hair and brush your teeth. you desperately needed a shower but you weren’t sure if you were up for that. the longest you’ve gone without one was probably 5 days. you were thankful that your hair didn’t get greasy easily.

the next thing you did was order food. door dash was probably the closest to being your best friend nowadays. you were certain that most of the groceries in the fridge had gone bad by now, as the last time you went shopping was with sunwoo a week or two before the whole incident. even if there was something good in the kitchen to make, you probably wouldn’t even be up for that either. you were also thankful that sunwoo left some of his backed up money behind because without it, you’d probably be hospitalized by now.

gosh, you loved being the emotionally broken one.

maybe this was a sign to start going to therapy? you sighed. it would be a nice thought if you didn’t hate the idea of talking about your problems to a random stranger.

you flinched when you heard your phone buzz violently on your bedside table, looking over at the device and rolling your eyes when it was sunwoo. again.

sunwoo:

please answer..

okay, maybe you did feel bad for ghosting him. something told you that this message was much more meaningful than the other ones. that maybe he was actually sorry.

you sighed for probably the millionth time that day, trying to build up the courage to actually send a message back.

you:

you sure have a lot to say

sunwoo:

oh my god.

you answered!

you:

im not dead if that’s what you thought was going on.

i wouldn’t give up that easily.

you definitely thought about it.

sunwoo:

how have you been?

why haven’t you come to school?

why haven’t you been talking to your friends?

why was he so persistent? he knows you don’t want to talk to him. it gave you a headache. you were really starting to wonder why you were still heartbroken over this man.

putting your phone down after leaving him on delivered, which seemed to be a common occurrence for you now, you were happy to see that your food arrived peacefully. what you weren’t happy to see was the person who delivered it.

it was one of your school friends, changmin. one of the ones who would definitely have been curious to know how you have been for the past few weeks. since when did he start delivering food?

“y/n? how long has it been? i’ve been texting you!”

you were going to be honest.. you haven’t even been looking at any of your messages unless they were from your parents or sunwoo.

which you only responded to your parents.

“aren’t you here to give me my food?”

“right,” he quickly took the money you had in your hand and shoved it into his pocket, handing you the bag. “uhm.. i know you might not want to hear this but people are really looking forward to seeing you back at school. we’re all worried about you and sunwoo.” this spiked your interest.

“has sunwoo not been at school?”

“he has. it’s just…”

“what? it’s just what?”

“he’s been with another girl everyday since you’ve been gone.”

you should have expected to hear that. it was the whole reason you were upset at him in the first place. the whole reason you couldn’t bare to even step outside anymore. it was probably the same girl he kissed in the photo.. you were angry. furious at him for cheating on you, asking you if you were okay, texting you every day all while he was still seeing someone else. granted, you both have broken up but still.. it hurt.

you fought to hold back tears at the thought of him loving up on someone else behind your back even though he wasn’t yours anymore.

but you failed.

changmin dropped to your side as you cried into his shoulder. your knuckles turning white from how hard you were gripping onto his thin shirt. you wanted nothing more than the ground to open up and swallow you whole. the same common feeling you felt for the past 3 weeks.

you cried for a while, your friend not making any effort to move or get back to his job. his only way of comfort was dropping whatever he had left in his hands and hugging your frail body. he frowned at how thin your body had gotten since he last time he saw you.

“can i stay for a while?”

“don’t you have a job?”

“you were my last delivery.”

somehow you didn’t believe that but you nodded anyways. feeling much more comfortable with him now that he knew exactly what your situation was. he comforted you enough to try and move you to the couch, taking the food with him.

“i’m not hungry anymore..” your appetite was ruined now. “you and i both know that you need to get something into your system.”

well, you couldn’t argue with that.

you both sat in whimpering silence as he helped you with your food, being with you the entire step of the way from feeding you to going back to laying down in the comfort of your bed. “y/n, i think that maybe you should actually have a talk with sunwoo,” changmin frowned at your tired state. “i don’t even think i could handle listening to his lame excuses,” you spat with rising anger.

“i know you have a lot of negative feelings about the whole thing but i really think it would help you to get over it if you just made things clear with him.”

“he doesn’t deserve my time.”

“but i think you deserve his.”

you didn’t want to think too hard about whatever kind of point changmin was trying to get across to you, but the more he said something about how your life is literally turning out to be the worse for yourself without confirmation from sunwoo, the more you started to realize that maybe he was right.

but still, you just couldn’t shake the feeling that maybe. just maybe. you could find it in yourself to get over him without an explanation as to why he cheated on you.

“i’ll think about it.”

he nodded, tucking you into bed and doing all of the basic needs for you like plugging in your phone and turning the lights off before finishing throwing away all of the trash and dirty dishes you had laying around the room.

“will you think about coming to school tomorrow?” he asked on his way out of the bedroom.

“will you be there?” you asked, lifting up your head from your pillow to stare at him in the doorway. “only if you are,” he smiled, to which you faintly gave him one back.

he gave you one last look before closing the door behind him to leave you in peace.

almost just like before, those eyes seemed to stick with you the entire night.

.

.

.

THE CONCLUSION

sunwoo:

the picture you received that night wasn’t real.

it was fake.

i’m so sorry that was that had been bothering you all of this time.

if i had known sooner, i would have made it clear that i would never cheat on you with someone else!

the girl i am with now, i swear it’s not what it looks like. i know you have heard things about her and i.

but my relationship with her it’s only platonic! i promise.

she wants me but i want you..

i still think about you

i still worry for you

i still care for you

and ill still do whatever i can to make it seem that way

i love you.

© cobiehaven 2023

#cobiehaven #tbz #the boyz #tbz sunwoo #kim sunwoo #sunwoo angst #tbz angst #lee sangyeon #tbz sangyeon #jacob bae #tbz jacob #kim younghoon #tbz younghoon #lee hyunjae #lee jaehyun #tbz hyunjae #lee juyeon #tbz juyeon #kevin moon #tbz kevin #choi chanhee #tbz chanhee #ji changmin #tbz changmin #ju haknyeon #tbz haknyeon #eric sohn #tbz eric

[hcuyk]

[ 18+ ] . . . . . . . . OUR INFERNO MASTERLIST

⧉ OUR INFERNO // elaborates the complexities within a relationship—the spark, the blaze, the pain. your love with hyunjae is a never ending fire; it's something so strong, so beautiful and powerful, that it suffocates you both into believing that your relationship would last, only for it to go down in flames ( ☄︎ )

╰ · · FROM THE BACK TO STRANGERS COLLECTION

› 〉 PAIRING // nonidol!hyunjae x fem!reader

› 〉 GENRE // varies every chapter : includes but is not limited to — high school au, college au, single dad au, enemies to fwbs to lovers to strangers to fwbs to ????, potential bad ending, smut, fluff, angst

› 〉 WARNINGS // varies every chapter : 18+ MDNI : includes but is not limited to — excessive profanity, cheating, toxic relationship(s), underaged drinking, these two are corruption itself : NSFW TAGS will vary and be stated in every chapter

˖⋆ STATUS ☆ ONGOING

˖⋆ STARTED ☆ 041424

⋮≡ [ OUR INFERNO EXCLUSIVE ] @deoboyznet @iloveu143 @flwoie @sanaxo-o @blue-rainydays

˖⋆ LAST UPDATED ☆ 041424

˖⋆ WORD COUNT ☆ 19k

⋮≡ [ PERMANENT TAGLIST ] @armysantiny @stealanity @zzoguri @nyujjan @tinisprout @the-kpop-simp @sunwoosberrie @winterchimez @mamuljji @prodsunwoo — lmk if you're a minor/uncomfortable with nsfw and i'll remove you from the taglist for this series!

||| ⧉ . . PART ONE: CHASING THE SPARK (THE FIRE TETRAHEDRON)

— —|— — i. FUEL, OXYGEN, AND HEAT

(일 ✧ 0001) — 4/14 — 19k

despite being your greatest archnemesis/rival/enemy/frenemy/whateverthefuck he was, hyunjae had always been by your side. that changed when your boyfriend was brought up, creating a newfound rift in your whateverthefuck relationship with hyunjae

— —|— — ii. THE FOURTH COMPONENT

— —|— — iii. CORRUPTION’S AFTERMATH

||| ⧉ . . PART TWO: LETHAL INCARCERATION (THE REIGNITION)

— —|— — i. SMOKE INHALATION

— —|— — ii. ASPHYXIA

— —|— — iii. VICIOUS TEMPTATION

NAVIGATION | THE BOYZ MASTERLIST

╰ · · AUTHOR'S NOTE : vae's nsfw debut let's hit it | lovely credits to my beta readers — @drunkdrazed @winterchimez @stealanity @simpforsunwoo

© https://hcuyk.tumblr.com/

#OUR INFERNO | lee hyunjae #deoboyznet #the boyz series #hyunjae fluff #hyunjae smut #hyunjae angst #tbz hard hours #the boyz fanfiction #the boyz au

[winterchimez]

Jealousy | Lee Hyunjae

pairing: idol Hyunjae x f!reader

genre: fluff, suggestive, influence of alcohol, jealousy is a disease

warnings: CONTAINS MAJOR SPOILERS FROM THE CONCERT SO PROCEED AT YOUR OWN RISK! (i highly suggest you watch the con first if you are unaware of what has caused us fandom to be traumatised 🫠)

word count: 1,404

a/n: so basically this whole idea came to me because of that PARTICULAR performance from Zeneration world tour that shall not be named for the sake of my insanity 🙃 i wrote this in one sitting, it's barely proofread so i humbly apologise-

21st May 2023. 

Time flew by quickly and it was already the last day of your best friend’s concert tour that was held in KSPO Dome, one of the largest and infamous grand venues where world-renowned artists have performed at. 

To say you were proud of your best friend, Hyunjae, would have been an understatement. You knew how much he and his group have been through for the past 6 years to get to where they are now. And now they were already onto their second world tour.

When your partner in crime practically got you free tickets for 3 days straight, how could’ve you said no?

Everything was planned out towards perfection. You were truly in awe of the entire planning process of the tour, from the stage set-up to the costumes, and of course to the flawless performances. 

One thing that you couldn’t have expected was how your bestie literally shed tears as he sang Horizon on stage. He wasn’t the type to bawl his eyes out, let alone let out all of his deepest emotions, even during your friendship. Heck, you were the one who always needed a shoulder to cry on, and he would be your best listener and comfort person, to say the least. You couldn’t help but to feel heartbroken seeing his vulnerable side on stage. 

But that wasn’t what surprised you the most. 

Certainly, nobody told you that he would be stripping on stage in front of 15,000 audiences. 

That made your jaw drop. And you just couldn’t get it out of your mind. 

As you made your way backstage, you greeted everyone along the way, from staff members to dancers, to the members, and eventually, towards your best friend. 

Being the goofy guy that he was, he headlocks your head in between his muscular arms and ruffles your hair, basically begging for compliments to be said about him. 

Of course, you gave the usual sweet words of praise that he always loved to hear, even complimenting him for his entrance during the opening till how he basically nailed every dance move in each song.

Except that you avoided talking about that particular performance. 

You felt like you weren’t your usual self, and you just couldn’t be as carefree as you usually were towards him. What was this emotion you were feeling? You have no idea. 

One thing you knew was that you practically avoided him like a plague during the after-party. 

Even though he was the one you’d always sit next to whenever you’d hang out, you couldn’t help but stick to the 98z gang, you always were close to them being in the same age group. Multiple times your friend has tried to get you back to where he was seating with Sangyeon and Haknyeon, but you tried by all means to seem like you couldn’t hear him or were too distracted by what was going on at your table. It was an after-party after all, there’s bound to be loud music, drinking, cheers, and games. 

A few times throughout the night your friend actually stood up and made his way towards your table, seemingly trying to physically pull you towards his, but every time you just found the reason to leave the room, saying how you’ve drank too much and needed to use the bathroom a little bit too often than usual. 

Eventually, the male gave up and decided to give you some space. You breathe in a sigh of relief, thanking the heavens that he was finally leaving you alone. Perhaps you really needed it, since your brain was still mentally processing what happened during that particular performance. 

Your group of friends were kind enough to let you stay at the hotel that they’d booked for the night, insisting that it was too late and dangerous for you to be travelling back to the apartment on your own. If you were given a free getaway place for the weekend, you of course had no reason to decline.

It was around 12am when you decided to let the members know that you’d be retiring to your room, that was until you heard a ding sound from your phone. 

It was a message from the person that you’ve been diligently avoiding. 

🎁 Hyunjae: Let’s talk. Meet me in front of my room. I will be waiting. 

You contemplated whether you should even accept his request, because hey then all of your efforts of avoiding the man has then gone to waste. But thinking about it, you’d actually feel worse if you left him all alone waiting for you to not show up.

In the end, you chose to be a good samaritan instead. 

You made your way towards his room located on the 12th floor, and sure enough, he was leaning against his door, arms crossed with his head down, and you swear he looked… annoyed? 

Whatever he was feeling, the goofy clumsy friend that you were accustomed to was gone. 

Slowly making your way towards him, you couldn’t help but not look him right in the eye. Instead, you muttered a soft “Hey, what’s up?” towards Hyunjae. 

Before you knew it, he was grabbing hold of your wrist and dragging you into his room, where he slammed the door shut and pushed you a little too aggressively against it. 

What was this? You have never seen such a side of Hyunjae before. Was it because of the influence of alcohol? Because you were certain he had a little too much to drink than he usually does. 

“Why are you avoiding me?”

“W-what? What’s going on Hyunjae-”

“Answer my question, Y/N.” 

You gulped. He seems… mad. Or is he not in the right mind because of alcohol? You couldn’t tell. In fact, you were a bit terrified by the current demeanour he was presenting. 

Just as you were about to think of a potential convincible answer, Hyunjae pins both of your arms above your head, and his gaze immediately darts down towards your now exposed neck. 

“If you’re not gonna tell me, then I’ll make you.” 

Without warning, he started leaving trails of kisses down your neck, sucking each spot and you couldn’t help but moan at the pleasure. God, he knew what he was doing, he was a master at this. Your knees began to feel weak, as he pushes one of his legs in between yours, which made you let out a gasp. 

Were you just gonna tell him the truth this easily? After all your efforts of avoiding him throughout the whole night? But if something wasn’t done now, god knows how long he is capable of doing- 

“I can’t believe you actually stripped on stage.” You blurted out all of a sudden which made the male stop his tracks.

It took a few seconds for Hyunjae to connect the dots, but when he did, he gave you the biggest smirk you’ve ever seen in all those years of being his close friend.

“Funny. You’re jealous.” 

“I’m not.” 

“Oh sure you were, that’s why you couldn’t look me in the eye and basically avoided me like a plague.” 

This time, he leaned his face closer to yours, till both of you were merely inches apart, as he fixed his gaze upon your lips this time. “You could’ve just told me, Y/N.” 

And there it was. Next thing you knew both of you were kissing. God, you have had so many fantasies about making out with your best friend, but not like this. 

The kiss was rough and breathless. Hyunjae practically gave you no time to have a breather in between, and that was when he suddenly lift you up where you practically wrapped yourself around the man as he lays you down onto his bed. 

In this heated moment, both of you were evidently taken over by lust, as you both began to undress one another. Before you could do that to the male though, he stopped your hands that were holding onto the hem of his shirt. “If you really want to see what’s underneath, you gotta work hard for it, sweetheart. Pleasure me.” 

That alone has left you stunned. Seeing this as an opportunity, he leans close towards your ear and gave you the most sensual whisper you’d ever expected to hear from him. 

“That reveal during Thrill Ride performance? Was specifically done just for you.”

a/n: the fact that i wrote this fic based on that particular stage clearly shows that im not okay HAHAH I'D JUST BURY MYSELF IN THE CORNERS OF MY ROOM FORGETTING THAT I ACTUALLY WROTE THIS GOODBYE-

masterlist

#the boyz #tbz #the boyz x reader #the boyz imagines #hyunjae #lee hyunjae #lee jaehyun #hyunjae x reader #tbz scenarios #tbz au #the boyz scenarios #the boyz fanfic #hyunjae imagines #hyunjae scenarios #hyunjae au #hyunjae scenario #the boyz angst #the boyz fluff #the boyz suggestive #the boyz zeneration

[stealanity]

[ lee hyunjae ] ꕤ loser, lover

word count : 1,524 genre : roommates au, enemies to lovers, angsty, a lot of crying, jealousy, hyunjae is a real asshole a/n : this is a repost !

as long as you can remember, hyunjae always played with your nerves. since you had the misfortune to find yourself being his roommate — with no chance of being able to fix it, your relationship is total chaos. he who was previously the man you dreamed of — in other words, your crush, had become your worst nightmare. every day, and even every minute, he manages to do something he knows will make you boil inside : like leaving all his dishes in the sink, or putting the garbage bags in front of the door, leaving a note on them, saying to to take them downstairs because he was too lazy to do it himself.. or unplug your computer before you have had time to save your work.

like yesterday.

situation that got you a sleepless night, strong coffee fuel to make sure you stay awake and finish your 15-page essay on time — even if the end result was catastrophic, causing you an unstoppable stream of frustration's tears. you still returned your work to your teacher, after staring at the clock, during the whole hour of class, which indicated that you hadn't slept since more than 24 hours. when the bell finally signaled the end of this exhausting day, it took you a few minutes to get motivated, lifting your weak body from your chair to notice, after putting your nose outside, that it was raining. a lot.

and obviously, you didn't take an umbrella with you.

reaching out to the sky, a few drops burst in the palm of your hand, extracting a weary sigh from you, before walking nonchalantly to your building. you had the impression that nothing of this day could be worse : between the tears which rolled down your cheeks all alone, mingling with the incessant raindrops which lashed your face, and the incomplete and surely atrocious homework you had returned, nothing worse could have happened — until a car passes by you and speeds right through a large puddle of rain, splashing you from head to toe. rubbing your face to try to remove the water that was streaming on it, you found that your makeup had run down your cheeks, depriving you of all hope of remaining worthy on this dreadful day.

all you wanted was to go home.

after a few long minutes of walking, you cross the threshold of your apartment, remaining motionless for a few seconds in the entrance, until you hear a mocking laugh. of course, hyunjae was here, and your condition obviously made him laugh. « you really look like a wet dog. » — after his sentence, you kicked off your soaked shoes and coat, walking slowly through the apartment, wishing to ignore him, until he pushes you back with his fingertips. « you're not going anywhere soaked like this, » he began, taking on an expression of disgust, « you will mess everything up. »

when you felt tears welling up in your eyes, you lowered your head slightly, clenching your fists tightly with the sole purpose of controlling your growing urge to hit him. « not like you're the one cleaning. » — you had the strength to say, despite the cracking of your voice. pushing him aside to go to your room, you were held back by his hand which gripped the hood of your sweatshirt. « you should repeat it louder, i didn't hear it right. » — ignoring his sentence when you finally felt the tears rolling down your cheeks, you sniffled lightly, which caught his attention.

« oh my god, you're crying? » he said, openly mocking you, and you felt your heart break slightly inside your chest. he kept crushing and playing with it, stomping on it, not caring how you felt — only focusing on his little person. but today you had enough, your mood and your warm heart was now cold as ice, and you didn't want to put up with his behavior anymore.

« you're a loser, y/n. » — this sentence made you twirl around, now finding you face to face with his mischievous angel face, and you hurriedly pressed your index finger against his chest, not noticing that his eyes softened at the sight of your face stained with ruined makeup and salty pearls escaping from your eyes. « enough jaehyun, i'm tired of this. i can't handle this anymore, i'd rather live outside than have to put up with you another second. this day was catastrophic and it's all because of you. you deleted my essay, you kept me up all night, broke my heart and i'm even sure it's raining because of you. stop breaking everything you touch, and above all, leave me alone. i don't want to have you near me anymore if it's for you to keep trampling on me. i have enough. »

suddenly, you felt nothing but warmth.

a soft warmth immersing itself in your body, as if you found yourself wrapped in a huge blanket. apart from the fact that it was actually two arms. you couldn't believe your eyes, and you wondered why hyunjae kept you all against him right now — but you were far too tired to react, letting your body melt against his, camouflaging your crying face against his chest. your desperate little hands clung to his top, coaxing a smile from him as he tenderly stroked your wet, messy hair. hyunjae couldn't help but find you adorable even when you looked like a huge mess — and it was when he saw the dark circles under your eyes and the tears running down your cheeks, that he realized he had gone too far. he had to stop resenting you for some stupid reason.

« it's been so long since we did this. » — he whispered close to your ear, making you nod slightly. truth be told, you felt like you couldn't remember the last time you were in his arms. looking up at him, coming face to face with his black pupils exploring your face, he finally spoke again : « i'm sorry. for everything. i'll make sure i don't cause you any more trouble. »

camouflaging your face against his muscular chest again, your fingers slightly released their grip on his t-shirt. « why do you hate me so much? » — sadness could be heard in your voice, which caused hyunjae's heart to tighten in his chest. he didn't hate you, he was just mad at you for flirting with his best friend, instead of him. « i don't hate you.. it's just.. i wanted you, but you chose someone else, » a sigh left his lips as you frowned, « i guess i think jealousy made me act like an asshole. »

« wait, what do you mean you wanted me? » — you say, pulling away slightly from him, finding your face a little too close to his, without really realizing it. a slight rosy tint painted hyunjae's cheekbones, who nervously scratched the back of his neck. « well.. » he said lightly chewing his bottom lip, « i really like you, but you were just hanging out with juyeon all the time. »

this time it was your turn to laugh at him, giggling as you crossed your arms against your chest. rolling your eyes as you stick your tongue against the inside of your cheek, you finally confessed to him : « yea, to talk about you. idiot. » — a faint 'oh' escaped the barrier formed by his lips, feeling dumber than ever. he could have avoided this kind of situation from happening, avoided seeing you and making you cry, but he had decided to act stupidly, guided by his ego of a wounded man and his misplaced jealousy.

taking a step forward towards you, now finding his torso pressed against yours, he naively slipping his hand into yours. « so.. does that mean– » he started, until you cut him off, « that i like you too? yea, that's what it means, loser. » — a stifled laugh escaped his lips, happy to finally find again your annoying character that he liked so much. approaching his face to yours slightly, he slipped his free arm around your waist, keeping you close to him, in the warmth of his arms that you loved so much.

« does that mean i can kiss you? »

rolling your eyes while wrapping his body in your free arm too, you pretended to think before answering : « i mean.. you should probably kiss me, yeah, before i– » and this time it was up to him to cut you off, pressing his warm, comforting lips to yours. he kissed you like it was something he had been waiting to do for a long time, bringing his lips to yours in a sweet and passionate exchange, picking up the previously trampled pieces of your heart.

and between the warmth of his arms, and the passion of his kisses, you finally felt like you came home.

thanks to hyunjae, your beloved enemy loser.

#hyunjae imagines #hyunjae drabbles #hyunjae scenarios #hyunjae timestamps #lee hyunjae #the boyz #tbz #the boyz imagines #tbz imagines #tbz scenarios #the boyz scenarios #the boyz drabbles #tbz drabbles #the boyz hyunjae #tbz hyunjae #lee hyunjae imagines #lee hyunjae scenarios #lee hyunjae drabbles #lee hyunjae timestamps #hyunjae x reader #tbz x reader #the boyz x reader #hyunjae angst #hyunjae fluff #tbz angst #tbz fluff #the boyz angst #the boyz fluff

[stupidkyupid]

𝐏𝐔𝐒𝐇𝐈𝐍’ 𝐍 𝐏𝐔𝐋𝐋𝐈𝐍’ - 𝖼𝗁𝖺𝗉𝗍𝖾𝗋 𝖾𝗂𝗀𝗁𝗍𝖾𝖾𝗇 ！

－ 𝖲𝖨𝖬𝖮𝖭 𝖢𝖮𝖬𝖤 𝖧𝖤𝖱𝖤 𝖡𝖴𝖣𝖣𝖸 ．．．

𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠 : treblemaker!hyunjae x newbella!fem!oc

𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞 : pitch perfect au, smau, romance, humour, drama, fluff, angst, college au

𝗉𝗋𝖾𝗏𝗂𝗈𝗎𝗌 | 𝗆𝖺𝗌𝗍𝖾𝗋𝗅𝗂𝗌𝗍 | 𝗇𝖾𝗑𝗍

𝐬𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐬 𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 | 𝐣𝐨𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 ! (𝗈𝗋 𝗃𝗎𝗌𝗍 𝖼𝗈𝗆𝗆𝖾𝗇𝗍 𝖺𝗌𝗄𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗍𝗈 𝗃𝗈𝗂𝗇!)

𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 : @simpinghrs @zwiehe

comments and reposts are appreciated + my asks are always open!!

𝐚 / 𝐧 : once again i cant make anything look sincere but i swear this is their final mini breakup

#hyunjae x reader #hyunjae #hyunjae x oc #hyunjae fluff #hyunjae angst #lee jaehyun #lee jaehyun x reader #chanhee x reader #eric x reader #jacob x reader #ju haknyeon x reader #juyeon x reader #kevin x reader #q x reader #sangyeon x reader #sunwoo x reader #younghoon x reader #the boyz smau #the boyz angst #the boyz headcanons #the boyz x reader #the boyz fluff #the boyz fanfic #the boyz au #the boyz imagines #the boyz reactions #the boyz #kpop smau #smau #kpop au