#lauren makes shitty edits

[lopez-richter-fangirl]

The Tin Can Bros have launched a kickstarter to celebrate their 10 year anniversary with SEVEN new projects, and they need our help!

Read on to find out how:

This is Brian Rosenthal, Corey Lubowich and Joey Richter

You may know them from Team Starkid, or you may know them from their own group the Tin Can Brothers (creators of projects such as Spies Are Forever and the Solve it Squad), formed in 2014. To celebrate 10 years, they’re raising a goal of $200k in order to stage seven projects

They’re currently a week into their campaign and have raised almost $50k with 675 backers. But they still have a way to go! And to help, we need to spread the word

TINLIGHTENMENT PROMO SCHEDULE:

Saturday 10th - The Great Debate

What is it?

A live comedy game show featuring Joey, Brian, Corey and special guests pitted against each other to win a debate. It gets silly!

How will I be able to see it?

Live shows in LA (and potentially other places!) throughout the year, digital tickets, and eventually some ‘episodes’ on youtube!

What can I share?

If you’ve been lucky enough to see past great debates on Patreon, talk about favourite topics and moments!

If you haven’t, share moments and clips from the first public great debate livestream happening on Thursday! (I think - if plans are changed then they’re doing a terrible job letting me help them)

Talk about guests! They talked about a Dropout crossover which I know people have been asking for with Starkid. I don’t know what that is but tell the people that do!

Tuesday 13th - Gross Prophets

What is it?

A brand new comedy musical featuring Joey, Brian and Lauren with music by Ali Gordon and Angela Parrish (shitty broadway! https://youtu.be/AZ-bOPiDqo8?si=F6guq3Pk_lOkCB5B)

How will I be able to see it?

Live shows (some workshop-y) in LA leading up to a run at the Adelaide Fringe, with digital tickets and eventual youtube release

What can I share?

We don’t know a whole lot about this project yet, but we do know it’s got a great cast and creative team - talk about those people!

That it’s going to Adelaide!! Australia is frequently in the top backing countries on kickstarters, and those people finally get a chance to see a TCB show live!

Theories on what the show might involve!

Saturday 17th - SIS at the Fringe

What is it?

An Edinburgh Fringe run of the fucked up Scooby Doo parody, with the original cast!

How will I be able to see it?

Live shows throughout the entire Edinburgh Fringe run in August, or a digital ticket!

What can I share?

This is an existing TCB property, so talk about what you love from the original! Share art, gifs, edits, anything!

That it’s going to Edinburgh! As above, UK fans have been desperate for this for ages, now’s our chance! Make sure people know about it!

Tuesday 20th - Spy Another Day LA and London

What is it?

A live concert screening (Hollywood Bowl meets Rocky Horror!) of Spies with most of the original cast for LA and TCB plus Lauren for London!

How will I be able to see it?

A live show in LA in Spring (likely April) with a digital ticket option, and a live show in London in early September following their SIS fringe run

What can I share?

Like with SIS, anything and everything you love about the original show! Angsty fics, art, memes, it’s all good

Joe Walker. To me personally he’s just A Guy, but some people are still shocked to be learning he’s doing a show again! Get those OG fans to support this!

That it’s going to London. I need Joey doing a passable to decent depending on how much he’s practiced English accent in London! And again, an opportunity for one of the highest backing cities to see them LIVE

Saturday 24th - TCBoB at 54 Below

What is it?

The songs from their musical This Could Be on Broadway in concert at 54 Below in New York City, with Joey, Brian, Lauren, Esther, Bryce and Clark, plus more performers to be announced!

How will I be able to see it?

Live in NYC in November, with a digital ticket option

What can I share?

The first workshop only got a digital ticket release but if you caught that, share favourite parts! And the soundtrack is available, so talk about how fucking good the songs are

The fact that it’s an opportunity for people to hear these songs live!

Tuesday 27th - Intelligent Life

What is it?

A reading of TCB’s queer sci-fi comedy TV pilot

How will I be able to see it?

Live in LA in early Summer, or by digital ticket

What can I share?

Like with Gross Prophets, this is a brand new (to us) project so we don’t know a lot! But we do know it’s gays in space! We love space gays

Remember, these are just ideas. Share anything you personally are excited for and think other people might be interested in! The aim is to make sure people are aware of these projects, what they entail and why they need to happen! Any other way you have of getting the word out about the projects and the campaign in general is valuable!!

Join our discord for more ways to help or to ask questions! https://discord.gg/4VNEBzpA

And if you’re hearing about all this for the first time, check out the campaign! https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/tincanbros/tinlightenment-world-tour

#i’ll probably share a lot of this info again when it comes to the promo days #cause this is a lot to read lmao #just wanted to get it all out there #tinlightenment #tin can bros #tin can brothers #tcb #starkid #team starkid

[xchaotic-foxx]

Just an appreciation for one of my fictional crushes. Someone who will never exist. One of the characters that @scytheaudio created. A man who I'm obsessed with.

MOTHER FUCKING CREED AND I DON'T KNOW WHY. He's stolen my heart and my brain. I can't go one day without thinking about him, I literally draw him on all my class work. I want him and need him. I LOVE HIM BUT HE DOESN'T EXIST😭 FUCK YOU SCYTHE, YOU MADE ME FALL IN LOVE WITH A MAN. THIS STUPID FUCKING BLONDIE WITH HIS NICE OUTFIT AND SWEET VOICE. I COULD LISTEN TO HIM ALL DAY AND NOT GET TIRED. He's so wonderful and is such a great character. In all seriousness, Lauren did great with design like she's done with all Scythe's characters. I could go on for hours irl about how much I love him and why but I don't have enough time nor battery for it lmao. Sure he MIGHT possibly have a drinking problem (mentioned in the newest episode of war of the witches. Or I might be dumb) and I'm not going to say "I can change him" but like... HE'S SO FINE THAT IT MAKES UP FOR IT. I'd get possessed by a demon on purpose just for him to save me 😔

Fuck you Scythe/j

(edit)

I want to chain him down and do his skincare. I want to be his shitty little house husband with a tight little fucking apron I can dramatically take off so I can hug him without getting him dirty!!! I WANT TO PLAY WITH HIS HAIR AND MAKE HIM LOOK SO STUPID! I want to plant kisses on his face as I feed him my shitty brownies! I want to help fix his tie and have one of those book moments where I'm just holding it and we make loving eye contact expect he'd ask what the fuck I'm doing. I want to have that cute little love that isn't perfect but it's love! I want to cuddle him close as I hold floofster also and watch bad soap operas while eating fast food! I WANT HIM TO HOLD ME WHILE IM SICK! THIS WORLD IS CRUEL, I'LL GIVE MY SOUL FOR SOME OF SCYTHE'S CHARACTERS TO BE REAL! PLEASE! 😭😭😭😭😭

(it's obvious that I'm sleepy, so night night)

#scythe audio

[scilessweetheart]

HI LOVE i have a goofy idea: bop or flop family trip/vaca edition

you can ignore this or make it into something completely your own. if you decide to do the standard bop-or-flop perhaps you could add a third secret option for spice. the world is your oyster and this post is your blank canvas

bop or flop:

road trip

gas station stops gas bathroom AND food stops (even better than a bogo!) cracker barrel (an American Treasure) no shoes on in the car you're on aux vs. someone else is on aux (a person of your choice) driving through the Middle Of Nowhere driving at night vs. during the day driving on highways/interstates/etc vs. taking back roads listening to FM radio vs. aux eating pungent food in the car driver's seat, passenger seat, or backseat (outer) or backseat (middle seat) the quintessential family argument

if you don't hate this i will gladly send more. i'm oscillating between bored and existential crisis BUT BUT most importantly pls enjoy your time & don't let me distract you from living your Main Character Moment <3

my god your MIND. i have never received an ask so catered to me specifically and i love you for it. no clue if i did it right tho. for the record, i’m borderline american midwest, which should explain a lot about my road-trip preferences. so first, either or, so if you read any of this please compare notes.

gas station food or drive thru. gas station bathroom or roadside. cracker barrel or golden coral or (insert preferred full stop meal). shoes on or shoes off. you on aux or someone else. Middle of Nowhere or city driving. night driving or day driving. interstates or back roads. FM or aux. eating pungent food (regret) or eating pungent food (pride). driver or passenger princess or window or middle. family arguments or passive aggressive.

now. i have separated this into two groups: answering as myself, and then answering as whoever is unlucky enough to be driving with me. because the result is very different. i literally end up just talking to myself but i thoroughly enjoyed this so thank you for the prompt :)

FOR ME

gas station stops: bop. i will get a slushee and an extra large soda and will be at peace for life.

gas station bathroom: for everyone involved - flop. simply disgusting. almost would rather roll the dice and pull over to the side of the road, but am not quite there yet.

cracker barrel: bop. i fuck up some cracker barrel for real. i also would like to know how you just knew i stopped here on road trips.

no shoes in the car: BOP. i’ll slide off the walmart birkenstocks and curl up into a ball in the backseat and be dead to the world.

me on aux: BOP. anyone else: FLOP. why would i tolerate music i only lukewarm care about when i could be the DJ of my own coming of age movie. (the size of the flop is dependent on who it is. lauren is the only one who comes close to being a bop. sorry bae)

driving in the middle of nowhere: bop. the adhd kicks in and i just like to zone out and focus on my current maladaptive daydream, so i’ll be set for hours and a barren wasteland of corn is the perfect white noise.

night driving: BOP. day driving: BOP. i have catered playlists to both scenarios and therefore am prepared for any situation.

highway driving: a surprising bop. i like being able to flip on cruise control and just follow the road. HOWEVER. backroads: bigger bop. because pretty <3

FM: flop. see aux cord.

eating pungent food: flop. i get car sick and food smell makes it worse.

driving: bop. passenger princess: less of a bop. window: the most bop. middle: massive flop. i can’t explain beyond this.

family arguments: bop. now you all are trapped with me and my shitty opinions.

FOR EVERYONE ELSE

gas station stops: flop. they make me have to piss every half hour which adds a good amount of travel time.

cracker barrel: flop. once i got so sick on a road trip from chicken and dumplings we had to pull over so i could throw up off the highway.

no shoes: flop. when we do pull over, it takes an hour for me to find both shoes and put them on.

me on aux: flop. anyone else is indifferent. i’m self aware enough to know i’m insufferable when i pull up spotify.

middle of nowhere: apparently it’s a flop from what i’ve heard, but i don’t know if i believe that.

night vs day driving: apparently night is a flop? people can’t see as well and get tired. once again, how do you not enjoy the empty.

FM: indifference. as long as i’m not on aux, no one else i know cares.

pungent food: bop. no one else i know seems to have a problem with it >:(

family arguments: bop. mine loves them. let’s release all the pent up tension 15 minutes into the drive and hope the awkward goes away by the time we get to our destination.

#lauren <3

[watatsumi-island]

@bladesappreciationweek Pls accept this shitty last-minute edit, I just had to make this. 😩😔💀

Inspired by @choicesarehard 💀

#Im laughing at my own dumb fucking joke ahahaha #ignore this luvs #blades of light and shadow #playchoices #pixelberry #choices #tyril starfury #tyril x mc #bladesaw #blades appreciation week #lauren makes shitty edits #lauren moments 😛

[blaithnne]

SERIOUSLY SADIE HOW THE FECK ARE YOU SO GOOD I LOVE LAUREN AND I LOVE HOW YOU DRAW HER (also yeee Tontu flunfy)

AHSBDIABDKDNFJDNFOJDIDJFODBWKDHRIEBWIEJDJD????

BRO MY HEART I CAN’T-

#dude I was having a kind of shitty day and this made me smile so much you are so SWEET 😩 #I’m very glad people like Lauren HDBDJDBJF #and making those screenshot edits are really funnn #and I’m pretty proud of the last one! #there’s a few things I don’t like ofc #like I think some of the lie art is too thin #and Lauren’s hands are W e i r d #the Hilda hand style is so hard to get right iswtg #THANK YOU AGAIN #pikablob #ask

[sunlightnstorms]

a bananaaaaa

#lauren lopez #joey richter #ashley skidmore #team starkid #tin can brothers #tcb #cod #choose our destiny #video #on todays episode of Maggie Makes Shitty Edits With Imovie On Her Phone #i was thinking about cod today #and this specific moment always gets me #also it is most definitely 1am right now so DONT JUDGE MY POOR DECISIONS

[mikecardenmpreg]

hello and welcome to another installation of “lauren’s shitty life” hosted by me, your host, lauren (and if you follow me on twitter, sorry i won’t shut up about this it’s only that it’s affecting my entire life)

you may or may not have gathered from my “trying to cover it up with humor” posts that i have gallstones. they are, in fact, making my life a living hell. it hurts to eat. and i really like eating. these last 8 or so months (or however long who fucking knows anymore) have been just one drawn out game of russian roulette: food edition. me after every big meal:

so i had a particularly bad attack at my friends’ place last week. it was far from my first attack so i knew the drill but it was a really intense one. catch me on the floor writhing and agonizing, like i do when you eat too much at a friends’ place. they posited a fun little theory: perhaps these pains weren’t just heartburn like i had been claiming, but maybe something i should probably see a doctor about. i thought. hmm. you guys might be right. and then did nothing about it because i was too weak from the agony in my ribcage to even speak or breathe. nearly passed out on the drive home because i could not get enough oxygen to my brain because expanding my chest region was almost impossible. probably should have gone to the er for this but

so naturally i had another attack the very next day. i was extra bummed about this because for once in my life, thanksgiving hadn’t been a total shitshow and i was excited to tell people about my totally average, drama-free thanksgiving! cue the writhing.

commence rapid fire googling while also rapid fire writhing on the floor! “searing pain upper right side ribcage” gives you about 100,000 results of “your fucking gallbladder you fucking moron”. and i went oop. woke up my parents at like midnight to complain and they go “call the advice nurse”. yeah. midnight on thanksgiving. someone’s definitely gonna pick up. also i can’t breathe because it hurts. thanks for that.

called the advice nurse the next morning and they scheduled me for an a video appointment with the first available doctor. let me tell you. i already had two things going on that day: had to take my car in for service and also it was black friday record store day. i could not take the day off. it was not allowed. so i spent my whole day bouncing between [where i work] and [nearby city where my car gets serviced] on the busiest shopping day of the year while also waiting for my video appointment with an unknown doctor about something kinda scary. not a fun or productive day for me. 

the doctor ended up booking me an ultrasound appointment because she came to the same conclusion i did: gallbladder’s haunted. but as it was friday afternoon, i had to wait until monday morning to go in. fun, productive weekend for me! i love being in purgatory. meanwhile, i’m deprived of my favorite fucking activity: stuffing my god damn face. i LOVE eating. i LOVE LOVE LOVE eating!!!! sunday night i had what was probably my last fried chicken sandwich for a very long time. it was good. but i didn’t enjoy it because it was overshadowed by guilt. 

went to the hospital before work on monday to get my ultrasounds. highlight: totally confused the ultrasound tech by wearing men’s deodorant despite being a woman. she wouldn’t stop talking about how long she’s been single and how the smell of men’s deodorant sends her. the poor girl. anyway that’s completely unrelated. she pretended like she couldn’t read the ultrasounds and sent me off with a “maybe.......don’t eat?” really reassuring girl.

my results came in later in the day (again, not a productive work day for me) to reveal i had two gallstones. my doctor asked me how i wanted to proceed. i was like. girl. you’re the doctor. you tell me. i sent her back a very long email about the last however many months and the severe pain i was in and the family history and the whole thing. this, by the way, coinciding with my fucked up back is hilarious. 2020 had its kiss for me. anyway. she emailed me back with just “surgery referral sent”. okay. 

surgery calls me to set up a video appointment with a PA. they do not tell me the point of this appointment. i do not care, but am pleasantly surprised how fast this is all moving. my video appointment gets scheduled for thursday, one week and one day after my initial “oh fuck” moment. the video appointment goes well. the PA tells me about my options but also says that two of the three options are basic horseshit and the only real option is full-on gallbladder removal. i’m chill with this. i’m done. just take the fucking thing out. we discuss diarrhea for too long. i ask how long recovery might take. he doesn’t have an answer because it all depends on how they have to extract the stupid idiot bile sack. the appointment ends on a less than hopeful note: someone will call either that day or the next to schedule surgery but it might be a wait before i can get in. i’m like, okay, that’s fine. i can wait a bit. it’s been 8 or so months. what’s a few more weeks?

well. i have another gallbladder attack that night. it lasts 8 hours. eight. fucking. hours. can’t sit. can’t stand. can’t lay down. can’t do anything but suffer. i eventually fall asleep around 4:30am. i wake up at 10, just in time for general surgery to call and tell me, i shit you not, that someone will be calling me soon. i cannot go back to sleep. i have to go to work. i am exhausted and frustrated and angry that i’ve just had my third gallbladder attack in 8 days. i probably should have gone to the er. definitely should not have eaten dinner.

no one calls me until 3:30 in the afternoon. and when they finally do, it’s to tell me they cannot schedule my surgery. they are fully booked through january. i am put on a waitlist in case someone cancels their surgery and i can be squeezed in. because this surgery to remove my defective gallbladder is considered “elective” and not “emergency”, i have to potentially wait at least two months. my gallbladder feels like this

and i have to wait two months because it isn’t an emergency. 3 gallbladder attacks in 8 days and it’s not an emergency. my digestive system is not functioning properly anD IT’S NOT AN EMERGENCY????? if any single person felt the way i did after eating, this would not be deemed elective. my body is not working. i cannot eat without fear of pain. i have already lost a noticeable amount of weight because i’ve been avoiding food. i need it out. it need it out!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i left work early, cried all the way home, got home, cried some more, fell asleep, woke up, and ate the saddest dinner: one quarter cup steel cut oats with honey and cinnamon. untoasted, unbuttered sourdough bread. unsugared tea. water.

this is my life for the foreseeable future. is this a good time to mention that my absolute favorite food is curry? a nice hearty, spicy, yogurt-y curry. and here i am. thinking about the plain white rice my gallbladder is gonna make me eat for the next two months.

i’m so hungry.

[beeblebouse]

Trans Beetlejuice headcannons? :3c

these are near and dear to my heart, so fuck yeah!

- lawrence beetlejuice shoggoth was born as lauren beetejuice shoggoth

- beej comes out to juno after he’s about 14 in breather years. this does not go well at all, and is one of the huge points of contention between them. (the only reason she calls him lawrence in front of the maitlands and deetzs is because it would make her look stupid, as bj passes so well.)

- bj comes out to lydia first, sometime after he returns from the netherworld after he leaves after the whole killing juno thing. in return, lydia comes out to him as trans. (he definitely cries a tiny bit and vows to Destroy any that misgender his sister bffff)

- (also just want to slip this in since i gave bj’s full name pre & post transition - lydia anne deetz was born logan andrew deetz)

- beej (accidentally) comes out to the maitlands next, as they walk in on him without a shirt on and see the surgery scars. (i don’t know how a demon would get top surgery, but i’m assuming the netherworld would have an equivalent, as i see it more like the cartoonverse where the netherworld is an Actual Liveable Society)

- they both take it in stride, and assure him nothing will change between the 3 of them. (except it does, because they all have the hots for each other, and end up in a relationship. sorry, i don’t make the rules, that’s just How It Is)

- he eventually tells charles and delia once he gets a bit more comfortable, and they both thank him for telling them.

- charles is unfazed due to having experience with lydia, and delia had some trans friends growing up, and so knows how big this is for him to be telling them.

- after coming out to everyone, beej gets a lot more relaxed with his clothing style, and starts sleeping shirtless again, seeing as everyone Knows.

- beetlejuice makes really stupid jokes when giving himself t-shots. (again, don’t think this would technically work because he’s Dead, but eh) he has many dumb names for t, and basically just starts memeing whenever he gives himself the shot.

- even though he’s a shape shifting demon, he still gets bad dysphoria days.

- at first, it’s usually lydia who helps him through these, and they usually end up cuddled together under a bunch of blankets, surrounded by snacks, watching crappy horror movies.

- once he starts dating the maitlands, they occasionally join the pile. however, they know that lydia understands it a bit more, and they make sure to give them Quality Time.

- the maitlands have their own ways of helping bj with bad days, though. they make sure to call him more masculine pet names, and they’ll lay in bed with him and compliment him on his masculine features when it’s too bad for him to even feel like getting out of bed.

- delia and charles usually leave it up to lydia and the maitlands in these days. however, they do tend to call him “mr. juice” on these days, and delia will compliment what he’s wearing wnd how masculine it is. (it may seem trivial/kinda stupid, but he Appreciates it a lot.)

- even though they’re shitty days, he really appreciates what everyone is doing for him.

- on really good days, he’ll show photos of him growing up. lydia usually joins in, and they’ll laugh at themselves pre-transition.

- pride is not ready for these two. they’ve definitely gone Full Feral at a bunch of parades, and they certainly will fight and transphobe/homophobe they come across.

- someone found out about lydia being trans, and tried to blackmail her. let’s just say beetlejuice gave the kid a night they’ll never forget. the kid was sadly still alive the next day, although they did apologize to lydia and never mentioned it again.

- bj has definitely run around the house yelling “WHERE’S MY DICK” as loud as he can whenever he misplaces his packer.

- edit: credit to the person who submitted the ask, @rustybutterknife , for this amazing edition: beetlejuice definitely has bad dragon packers. (if you don’t know what they are, google them at your own risk.)

- beej doesn’t have bottom surgery (yet) because he’s just a bit,,,, iffy about it, and he doesn’t typically have a huge amount of bottom dysphoria, and so just hasn’t gotten it.

- pride gear everywhere year round. however, the house is basically converted into one big conglomeration of pride flags during the month of june.

- at the end of the day, he couldn’t be happier. he has a family that loves and supports him, and would have his back when juno (eventually) came back.

i really hope you like them! some of these were based off of my experiences, so i hope you don’t mind lol. (i may try and make some doodles based off of these soon, but i have to see if i have time rip.)

thank you for sending in the suggestion!

#beeltejuice broadway #beetlejuice the musical #beetlejuice musical #beetlejuice bway #trans beetlejuice #beetlelands #goldenrat #headcanon #lydia deetz #trans lydia #barbara maitland #adam maitland #charles deetz #delia deetz #catch me projecting #like a clown #because i can

[arinaco]

Pidge - the heroine with Schrödinger problems

Translated and edited by @Nadezhda932

I think it's worth saying a few words about Pidge, because as far as it seems no one ever spoke about the problems of her character. Actually, even her creator, Lauren Montgomery, after the release of S8 with greatly changed original script began to insist that Pidge was fine and had no flaws. Although Pidge's problems were voiced by Keith in the first episodes of the series. This is absolute indifference to everyone who is beyond her personal circle of people, everyone she doesn't like or cares. “You can’t leave everyone to the mercy of fate for the sake of personal desires!” - says Keith, who, with all his teenage issues and egoism, is a very responsible guy (that very trait which will help him grow to the Black Paladin over time). “I really can!” - Pidge answers confidently.

Pidge is a supporting character, but her problem was announced almost immediately. Why? Because she is the favorite character of the main screenwriter, Lauren Montgomery. A good screenwriter knows that a hero without flaws and problems is of no interest to anyone. You know, there is an interesting point in that Lions (with the exception of White and Black) are in many respects opposed to each other. And if the first and most obvious coupling is Red and Blue, then the coupling of Yellow and Green is in the background and remains invisible, although it was also shown quite early. The Yellow Lion is a self-confident rock, a support for others. The strongest and most massive of all. If Blue is the one who consoles and wipes away tears (healer in game terminology), then Yellow, as a powerful shield, will take all the fire upon himself (tank). Do you need to be reminded of what happens if a healer or a tank falls in a game during a raid on Boss? It’s shitty, despite the fact that they have the lowest attack in the group.

The first appearance of Yellow is marked by the fact that he stands between the Blue and the enemy as a shield.

The Green Lion is ... an extravagant scientist, shallow and fidgety. This one will not protect anyone, but will crawl anywhere and achieve her goal. She doesn't have a powerful attack, but she has a trick. In game terminology, she would be called an assassin-horn, the most insidious class (that's who exactly from the ninja clan ...). He is an even greater loner than Red - who, although selfish, is held by Black, as his right hand. The Green Lion is on her mind, her motives are not always understood by others, but she doesn't want to be understood. 

It's funny that the paladins always used Green to sneak past the Galra imperceptibly

Paladins reflect their Lions. Hunk, despite his fears, immediately stood up for the inhabitants of Balmera, simply because if not him, then who? He is the person who is ready to stand up for the first comers if he sees that they need his help. It doesn’t matter: Galra, humans or some new unknown race. Hunk is a born negotiator, he knows how to understand people and is always ready to make contact. And Pidge is... his exact opposite. She was ready to abandon everyone who depend on her, for the sake of saving her father. What about establishing contact with strangers... it's not something that she can't do, she simply doesn't want to. She always says what she thinks, not caring how much it hurts others. Do you remember how she said to Allura something like: "Your father is dead, but my one is alive"? Can you imagine how painful it was for Allura to hear this?

Allura couldn't have done that. And it’s a pity, in S6 it would be very useful to her.  

And this is her problem. This is a problem for many children spoiled by their parents. After all, these are the roots of Pidge's behavior. Let's recall her childhood. Katie is a special girl from a special family: brilliant scientists, not like everyone else. Because of this, she had conflicts with her classmates - but on the other hand, the family itself nurtured and cherished her, assuring that it was good to be special. “You are exceptional and that’s wonderful" - they said. Forgetting that there's nothing remarkable in the inability to communicate with peers in a normal way. And that surely the conflict was not only one-sided - sorry, but Pidge isn't made of sugar. No wonder her entire company in the Garrison consisted of Lance and Hunk - VERY flexible and patient ones in communicating with other people. Blue and Yellow paladins, remember. But the problem was ignored, it was solved by stroking the daughter on the head. The girl was cherished, the girl was spoiled. The girl is a genius, which means that everything is excusable to her. The girl abandoned her mother without hesitation and fled, for the sake of the mythical opportunity to save her father and brother. Think about it: what it was like for this unfortunate woman? The husband and son went missing, and the daughter followed them. And not for a day, not for a week. For months and years.

Pidge didn't think about it. Pige didn't want to think about it. And this is a problem that remained unresolved. You know, a person’s character is revealed when he or she doesn't need to hold the face. When he or she isn't obliged to establish good relations, when this person is the master of the situation. And the authors directly showed us how deplorable the situation is with Pidge. Do you understand what I'm talking about? I'm talking about the very scene when the issue of giving of Lotor to Zarkon was being decided.

Stop the planet, I’ll come off... quiznak, it's all the same in the entire universe.

There is something very significant in that Lotor then stood in front of the paladins without a helmet, face to face. More precisely - eye to eye. Since this is very important. Stormtroopers in Star Wars, Galra soldiers in VLD series, and even quite real death row in modern China - they all have their heads covered. At least the eyes. Because it depersonalizes a person. No personality - no empathy. You can abstract from it, you can stop considering this man alive. He's not the same person as you, which means that there's nothing wrong with his murder. That's why the scene where an inanimate robot takes off his helmet and turns into a person with eyes - windows into the soul - is always very important in any motion or animated picture. He is now a person. He is alive. You need to step over yourself to raise your hand on him, and his death is no longer something insignificant for the plot. And now a little girl of 14 y.o. screams almost with foam at her mouth, demanding that this living person - completely dependent on the decisions of the paladins - must be put to death.

I need to say, the rest of the team was slightly shocked too.

Didn’t you have a jump in your soul? No thoughts about Christian values, psychological barriers to killing a person. Well, you know, about things that should seem to matter in our culture. I understand that Pidge wanted to save her father. But I absolutely can't accept how easily she was ready to kill Lotor, who completely depended on the mercy of the paladins and didn't show any aggression towards her. Like, "if I didn’t shoot him myself, but through third parties, everything is normal"? The hands ard clean and conscience too. After all, the latter snores sweetly. Of course, you can say about the enemy, and that there's no place for compassion, but you're the paladins, not unprincipled Galra. You're the good guys. Or not so good anymore? Even from a position of profit and simple logic, the Galra prince could bring much more benefit in war than a scientist with an industrially backward (from the point of view of the universe) Earth. But what benefit, what compassion we're talking about. "Give me dad back!" and that’s it. As a result, the paladins didn't even think of giving Lotor at least some (!) chance for the rescue. They didn't come up with at least some plan. They stupidly decided to give him to Zarkon, knowing that for Lotor this was a one-way ticket, and knowing that with a high probability Zarkon would deceive them - that is, Lotor's death could be in vain. Bayard was given to Lotor by Kuron, after Haggar ordered to activate the third phase. Haggar didn't want Lotor's death. And this is a big problem, actually. Because Haggar-Honerva herself showed how dangerous a brilliant, but unprincipled scientist is. But if Honerva became so because of quintessence, then Pidge is a direct result of improper upbringing. Alas, in this series this problem wasn't solved. Because the entire story arc of Pidge in S8 was cut out. What was this arc? The realization that not the whole world revolves around you. That not only your interests matter. That you can objectively be wrong with others, and you must be able to admit your wrong. Simply put, the Pidge's arc must be connected to two figures: The first figure is a figure embodying one-sided attachment for Pidge. Love without bestowal, as it often happened with the love of parents to Pidge herself. The second figure is an absolutely alien person for Pidge who is not in the circle of loved ones. Pidge was often rude with such people, and she must realize how wrong this behavior was. Who are these figures? I think the answer to this question is not difficult: Lance and Lotor. Pidge got used to the fact that all the people who are not indifferent to her revolve around her. In particular, Lance and Hunk. But in his chase for Allura, Lance began to move more and more away from his friends. They ceased to be Garrison Trio from the first seasons, who used to do everything together.

Nothing unites people like a joint escape from the cops... at least it used to unite.

For Pidge, this was very unusual. And very hard. Especially the moment when Lance, with the help of his "retinue", invited Allura on a date. Now they're not a company of friends - Hunk, Pidge and Lance. Now Lance is with Allura, and they're somewhere on the side. Pidge feels that for an important person she is now in second place. And she really has a hard time feeling it. She's used to take care of loved ones, and she continues to take care of Lance. But she has to personally face what you feel when your care isn't appreciated and remains unnoticed. When your love is taken for granted and never comes back. She's in the place of her own mother, whom she so easily abandoned, ignoring the fact that her mother might worry about her.

Does it hurt? Yes. But it's necessary. Alas, this part of the plot was never developed. There's nothing to talk about Lotor, remembering the events that I described above. Do you remember the paladins apologizing to him? No, you don't, because it never happened. And Lotor - oh, such a bad guy - forgave them and pretended that everything was fine, just an everyday matter. Lotor is used to the fact that people around him treat him like a piece if crap. He forgave the generals, forgave the paladins. He forgives everyone, what a vile bastard he is. But since the entire arc of justification or redemption - no matter - of Lotor was cut out, the whole arc of Pidge was cut out too, the arc where she realizes her wrong. There's no awareness of wrong - there's no rethinking of oneself as a person. No growth, no development. Pidge remained convinced that everything she had done was right. And it's just awful, because the children see it. They see and find something close to themselves in Pidge. And they see the message - yes, that’s right, that’s okay. Then these children will grow up and some of them will become not a small Pidge, but a big Haggar. And it won't be funny at all.  

#voltron pidge #voltron #vld #vld pidge #pidge

[sunsetsover]

your thoughts on last nights ep?

fuck!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! that’s literally my only thought. just like… fuck!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! u know???

like i was just completely blindsided bc i had mostly convinced myself callum was gonna be the duff duff so i was not expecting much in that aspect but then he came back within like?? the first ten minutes?? so that alone had me like !!!!!!!!! but then there was just that heavy moment where they’re literally just looking at each other and then ben swept everything off the desk and That Happened and i felt the emotional equivalent of missing a step on the stairs, u know what i mean?? like my brain was just like lauren what the FUCK is going on and i’m like bro i don’t KNOW… like genuinely it took me a good few hours just to recover from the shock of it all…. but tbh i’m still not over ben wrapping his arms n LEGS around callum and making all those little noises like jesus christ

and then there was that super sweet moment in that second scene where ben is all cheeky like ‘u know there are easier ways of getting a discount on a motor, don’t u?’ and callum is just so obviously Enamoured n they tell each other they’ve missed each other but then reality came crashing back down when callum asked him why he broke up with him and u see ben’s walls come down and callum isn’t stupid he sees it too and was probably lowkey expecting it to happen but it doesn’t mean it hurts any less esp when ben says it was a mistake bc callum knows in his heart that what they have is as far from a mistake as u can possibly get :-( 

but there was this one moment in that scene where callum said to him ‘you can talk to me’ and you can SEE ben considering it just for a moment and callum knows it too bc he sits up straighter and leans forward as if he’s preparing himself to hear whatever it is ben is gonna tell him but :-( ben doesn’t :-( bc he’s trying to protect callum :-( n it’s just so sad i’m heartbroken for them 

but THEN ben had that scene with louise that well and truly went for the jugular like both max and tilly absolutely SMASHED it (tilly has killed this whole sl tbh and it’s a piss take that they’re giving her this kind of material RIGHT before she’s leaving) i felt like i couldn’t even breathe and it was just so heartbreaking bc louise is absolutely losing it and then u see ben start to lose it too (bc he said, didn’t he? that if callum came back it would break him? and within hours it already was) and i’m just so fucking mad at phil bc he is so clearly not at all bothered abt what happened but not only that, he doesn’t care abt his kids. like we all knew that already but it’s just like…. look at what he’s done to them… all bc he couldn’t handle the fact that sharon fucked someone else like…. he’s fucked them BOTH up and then as soon as he got what he wanted, he didn’t even give enough of a fuck abt them to notice that they’re breaking down. like it wasn’t until lisa pointed it out to him that he even noticed louise was losing her shit, and same goes for kathy telling him that ben wasn’t coping either. like he doesn’t even care enough to notice, and he LIVES with both of them now. it just fucking infuriates me he’s such a shitty dad and i just. want them all away from him. prick.

but yh that scene broke my fucking heart again, and then it broke again in that scene w louise and lisa and just god…. it was so hard to watch like she’s so clearly cracking up and all phil cares abt is not ending up getting arrested like….. i hate him sm man i can’t wait for lisa to get louise out of there she’s going to be so much better off :-(

i also ADORED that scene in the cafe where it was like ash/habiba/lola/jay/tina/kathy all talking abt mo bc it was just a silly little breather between all the drama but it was so fun and they’re all characters i really like so i loved it n i hope we see more scenes like that bc they’re fun

so yeah overall i think the whole ep was amazing tbh like in every aspect i really enjoyed it like the acting slapped the writing slapped the whole energy slapped n i hear the same guy who wrote last night’s ep wrote tonight’s too so i’m very excited to see it!!!!!!!!!!! can’t wait for to be completely fucked up once again!!!!!!!

💖💖

EDIT: the mick and shirley stuff too!!! i forgot abt that!!!! they killed it!!! danny dyer esp like i feel like he’s so often comic relief and it’s easy to forget what a good actor he is so i really didn’t expect that scene at all and it threw me for a loop... like in hindsight it was a really heavy and intense episode tbh but it was all so good

#eastenders #ballum #anon #question

[ghostsontelevision]

ok black friday official review SPOILERS under the cut. hopefully they fixed it so cuts work on mobile but if not uh. scroll fast i guess.

okay to start off? the songs? bangers. jeff blim really said every song on this soundtrack is gonna slap. i don’t think there’s a single song i disliked? wiggle is a standout, feast or famine rules, adore me rules, hell even the little song becky and tom sing when they’re looking for hannah is just. insanely good.

angela does a REALLY good job as lex, like she embodies this shitty disillusioned teen so well and she and kendall have great chemistry as sisters. she and rob also have really good chemistry, i love the bit where he goes “oh i guess i forgot cuz im just SO stupid” and she like, laughs and pushes him off, they have a lot of cute moments

(side note: i know with tgwdlm the theories as to why paul and emma never kissed was either lauren doesn’t like to kiss onstage or the lang bros don’t like making people kiss onstage, i think with black friday we can safely confirm the langs have no issue with making people kiss onstage LOL)

tbh all the acting is stellar as expected, i haven’t seen enough people talking abt how jaime kills it as sherman, so i’m gonna say that jaime kills it as sherman.

for something everyone’s been saying: lauren as linda monroe is SO good. i saw some people saying she was written confusingly, which i didn’t get at all? she seemed very straightforward to me. but yeah she was a delight every time she was on stage, it didn’t hurt that she got two of the best songs.

the running bit with gerald was good without ever seeming overdone, implant the way linda says “cinnabon” into my brain pls

i also really liked becky! i thought we got a lot of well written female characters this time around. i thought she balanced being a genuinely loving and empathetic character with also being the only character to have done a non-black-friday-related murder. her killing linda was very satisfying, i liked their dynamic

if becky becomes the new charlotte and i have to sit through 20 million “starkid unpopular opinions :)” videos talking abt how becky sucked and was annoying i’ll riot. charlotte and becky defense squad

i can’t just go through praising every character lol but also dylans return to starkid is worth the hype. it feels like he’s grown leagues since twisted

(hey langs? is literally ANYONE in hatchetfield happily married or is everyone either divorced, widowed, or being abused? are paul and emma going to have to invent good marriages?)

(wait mr. davidson and his wife are good nvm)

(i hope in the black friday verse mr. davidson communicates with his wife abt his needs in the bedroom)

the plot was pretty good, like things made sense and all that. i was a little worried abt an ensemble cast but tbh it’s really not that bad, like everyone’s easy to keep track of and no like, character development feels rushed or anything

tbh the only things that bothered me were lex never finding out that ethan dies (tho i get that there just wasn’t time for it since she and hannah don’t reconnect till the end) and that i personally wasn’t crazy abt the president segments? i would’ve rather just like, had mcnamara undercover at the mall and he like, finds hannah or lex and that’s when he explains everything. maybe wiggly shows up when like, hannah falls asleep or something, we’ve already implied she has a connection to the black and white so just push that more.

(tho tbh then the whole wiggly’s connection to america -> made in america doesn’t happen, so maybe the presidential scenes are a necessary evil who knows. tbh i liked the entire black and white bit)

(also starkid finally includes a fuck america song that makes sense in the narrative hell yeah)

i think the langs are pushing a like, everyone dies at the end of every hatchetfield show kind of thing, which is why it’s really heavily implied everyone gets nuked at the end, but i think you could’ve gotten the same tone by just emphasizing that wiggly mania is ALL over america, and we don’t know if any other place survived, if wiggly found another person to come through, etc. like you don’t need ww3 on the horizon to make it bleak

idk just imo ending act 1 with characters we’ve never seen before seems like a weak choice

(the obama impression was fuckin good tho)

also i’ve never been so confused by an act 2 opener but as soon as i realized what was going on i was delighted

santa claus goes to high school > workin boys do not @ me

(honestly its funny as hell to me that the langs probably KNEW santa claus goes to high school was coming when everyone was losing their shit over workin boys like. could yall demand a full musical of something that isn’t a 2 minute joke pls)

oh my other plot nitpick is why did becky have that syringe but i’m willing to handwave it as she came here straight from work and accidentally left it in her pocket

i liked the tgwdlm callbacks, some of them felt a little gratuitous but overall they were good. the SHRIEKS of joy when emma mentions hidgens were hysterical.

overall it was really good! i think tgwdlm is still my favorite just because the plot feels a little tighter but honestly black friday might surpass it on the strength of the soundtrack alone. its absolutely in my top 3.

OH ALSO THE CHOREOGRAPHY after my initial watch i put the digital ticket on a few times while i was drawing just to get the most out of the 72 hours i had it and i always stopped what i was doing to watch that one lauren-james-robert bit in deck the halls of northville high. you know the one.

anyways it was good 9/10

EDIT: also i forgot but i... think the langs forgot abt the lgbt character? rumor has it mcnamara had a monologue that got cut where he confirms he had a husband but it didn’t make it into the show so idk. maybe it’ll be in the youtube version

#black friday spoilers #bf spoilers

[watatsumi-island]

*Chuckles* We're in danger.

#Now of all times my editor stops working AGAIN. #Anyways. #*Clears throat gently* #IF THEY CANCEL BLADES I WILL DO MORE THAN JUST LEAVE THE APP #I WILL SHOOT SOMEONE #playchoices #choices #pixelberry #blades of light and shadow #blades of light and shadow 2 #blades 2 #open heart #bolas #oph #lauren makes shitty edits #tw shooting mention #lauren moments 😛

[ruinedthatfriendship]

I Hate You, Love Demi

A/N: In which Demi writes a lot of letters, which inevitably fall into the wrong--right?--hands. Still don’t love this one even after miles of edits but oh well. Here you go.

Demi sat cross legged on her bed, the blank book open in front of her, tapping her pen absently against the paper. It had seemed like the perfect idea when her therapist had suggested it. God knows she had so many things she was always wishing she could shout at him. But now that she actually had a book dedicated to the things she’d never said, her mind was blank.

“Have you thought about writing letters?” her therapist had asked. Months after the whole thing blew up, she’d finally confided in the woman about her affair with Simon. About what it had really meant to her. About the way she still couldn’t get over it.

“I’m sure you had a lot to say to him, Demi, and it doesn’t sound like you got a chance. Get a book,” she suggested. “Write what you wish you could tell him. It’ll give you closure.”

Demi smiled a little at the memory of her session this morning. Her therapist was a wonderful woman, generally of a very calm disposition and there to support Demi through some of the worst moments of her life without batting an eye. This morning, the look on the older woman’s face had Demi wondering if she was about to take the next flight to London, just so she could punch Simon Cowell in the face.

And maybe that was a place to start, because she certainly shared the sentiment sometimes.

Demi uncapped the pen, ran her hand down the page to crease it and keep the book open, and scrawled out a message, her handwriting shitty on purpose--it reflected the mood.

Dear Simon, it read, with his last name hastily crossed out. I hate you.

The following morning, she opened the book again, turned to the backside of that first page, and added an addendum: Dear Simon, I really wish I could hate you.

It started with just a few sentences, here and there. In the moments where she once would have tweeted at him, she picked up the book instead. When she woke up alone in a bed that was too big for her with the last remnants of her dreams slipping away in the daylight, she wrote out what she wished she could scream.

Dear Simon,

I dreamed about Maddie last night. And I thought it would make me feel better if it wasn’t about you but I think I just miss you more. I want to hate you so much. I still can’t.

~

Dear Simon,

I’m eating breakfast. Slowly. But I’m eating. I don’t want to. Everyone on Twitter was talking again and they’re right, I am so fat. I really just want to throw up. So I’m going to write this and be mad at you instead. It’ll distract me.

I’m not really mad at you.

See? I kept my promise. Even if you’re not around I still came to you for help.

Why was it so hard for you to keep the promises you made me, Simon? Huh? I don’t get it. Actually I do. It’s not like I was really good enough for you. Lauren is really pretty, you know. I hope you’re happy.

~

Dear Simon,

The new album is out tomorrow. I can’t believe how much work it was to go through my notebook and pick songs to record that weren’t about you. There weren’t very many of them. Stone Cold is for you, though. Are you going to listen to it? Do you even still care? Would you know what it was saying if you heard it?

Eric is a beautiful baby, Simon. I’m happy if you’re happy.

~

Dear Simon,

Wilmer and I broke up. I’m still crying. I think I just broke his heart, I don’t know what to do. I feel like shit.

Mostly I just feel bad for not feeling that bad. He’s right. I wasn’t in love with him. He said he didn’t want to compete with someone who wasn’t even here. I wanted to tell him it wasn’t true but I couldn’t just stand there and lie.

I think I want to hate you again.

~

Dear Simon,

Maybe they’re right. Maybe you do only fall in love once.

~

Dear Simon,

Today I am four years sober. And I have to acknowledge that you’re a big part of that. You helped me save myself so many times. And even when you haven’t been here, it’s been your voice in my head telling me it’s okay to pick up the phone if I need to call someone. The truth is you’ve always been with me, and I think you always will be, because you don’t just forget someone you loved the way that I loved you, and I think I’m okay with that.

You taught me so much, and gave me so much. I’m grateful for the laughter and the nicknames and the late nights--and early mornings, and lunch breaks--and your hugs and your kisses and your love, for however long I had it.

Thank you for everything. I hope I’m still making you proud, and annoyed, every time you hear about me. I take my job as your little brat very seriously, you know.

~

Dear Simon,

The way that I love you.

I can’t lie to myself, I never stopped.

You are, and always will be, the single greatest love story of my life.

Love, Demi

~

Dear Simon,

I’m still a little stunned to have heard from your people. But here I am, over the Atlantic, coming to sing. And I know it’s a good move for ratings but I can’t help but wonder why you didn’t pick someone else. I know I’m not the only star you could have asked to come on BGT.

Is it stupid of me to hope that maybe a little part of you wanted to see me again?

I’m not going to lie, I’m really fucking nervous.

Still… can’t wait to see you again, Si. Even if it breaks my heart.

All my love, Demi

Fighting to quell the nervous butterflies still twisting up her intestines, Demi focused on the clouds flying past her window, sliding the leatherbound book back into her bag. She was going to see Simon again. She was going to sing for Simon again, with a setlist that nobody really knew was all written about him in the first place.

She hadn’t lied in her letter, she really was excited to see him. That didn’t mean she wasn’t also terrified. And she didn’t feel nearly so bold and brash about the possibility of getting her heart broken as she’d made it out like in that last line.

Lost in her thoughts, Demi didn’t think twice about passing off her little bag of essentials off to one of the assistants on her team when the woman held her hand out, let herself be swept off to get ready without sparing a second thought for any of it.

She brought the book of letters to London because it was practically a nightly ritual to write something to him, but it certainly wasn’t on her mind all the time. It never even crossed her thoughts that putting herself, and Simon, and that book, in the same place for the first time in years might not be a good idea.

She was here to perform. She was here for her career, she was here to put on a show. And if she happened to throw on a little extra makeup and a more form-fitting outfit for her act than usual, well, so what? She had to at least casually show him a little bit of what he was missing.

It was a rather split-second decision to sing ‘Never Been Hurt’. She hadn’t planned it, it hadn’t even really been on the table as an option when they’d talked about what she was going to sing.

But this was maybe going to be her last chance, her only chance to see Simon again. There was no guarantee she’d ever sing for him again. There was next to no chance she’d get to see him personally today, not when he had to manage the rest of the live show and she was leaving London in the morning.

If this was her only way to communicate anything to him, one last time, what did she really want to say? And she wasn’t mad anymore. And she didn’t hate him. And her heart was still broken and probably always would be a little bit, but it was worth it to have had him at all. And he was always going to be the greatest love of her life. No matter what had happened between them in the past.

So this would be her last little vow to him. That she was strong and fierce and independent, and her decision would always be to love him, no matter what. No matter how strong she was, she couldn’t fight that.

I love you for the good and the bad and the home you gave me and the shirts I still have and the jokes and the teasing and the really good orgasms and who you are underneath everything and I am going to burn this stage up for you. What did she have to lose?

Still, Demi waited for her cue with a death grip on the microphone in her hand. Please, please don’t let me be making a huge mistake, she prayed.

And then the set parted for her to walk through, and she slapped on a performance smile, waving once at the audience and hitting her first mark on the stage without once tripping in her heels, the first words falling from her lips. Here goes nothing.

She tried to find Simon at the judges’ desk, but he was silhouetted in shadow with all the lights on her, and she couldn’t quite tell if she was actually looking at his eyes. Oh well. Close enough. “My heart’s on the front line, I’m not afraid,” she belted out, putting as much power as she could into the line.

“I will love you, like I’ve never been hurt.”

The crowd was cheering for her the whole time, but at this point she really only cared for the approval of one. “You fought through the darkness and brought me back to life,” She wouldn’t be where she was without him. She didn’t like to put responsibility for her recovery onto someone else, and it certainly wasn’t all him. But in so many ways, Simon had saved her.

“I will love you like I never, like I never heard goodbye, like I never heard a lie,” Demi stopped in the center of the stage, her body tilted so she was angled right in front of him. Her voice dropped from the powerful range she’d been singing in, falling to a gentle promise. “Like I’m falling into love for the first time.” Every day, all over again, whether she wanted to or not.

All of the judges stood when she finished, catching her breath and smiling with a few little waves to the crowd, but she still couldn’t read Simon’s face. She couldn’t tell what he was thinking, it had never been her strong suit, and his face now, while playing politely for the cameras, was completely closed off to her.

And then she was being ushered offstage and there was nothing more she could do and he was gone again and her temporary bravado abandoned her entirely, leaving Demi with a familiar, heavy weight in her stomach. But what had she expected? He would just leave his girlfriend, publically walk up on stage and declare his love for her? Was she delusional?

She walked into her dressing room a bit angrily, fighting to detach the clip to her earpiece from the back of her outfit, and froze with her hand on the doorknob as she took in the scene.

“What--what is going on?”

Her assistant, the one she’d given her bag to, was pacing the room and looked on the verge of breaking down completely. And the book she should never have brought to London was sitting out, conspicuously, on the middle of her makeup table.

“Why is this here?” she asked as casually as she could, shutting the door behind her and crossing the room to pick it up. Maybe she was overreacting, maybe it was a coincidence, maybe nobody had read it.

“I think I made a mistake,” her assistant whispered, tears sparkling in her eyes.

Demi raised an eyebrow. “Which is what?” Usually she was so much more friendly with her team. But she was about to have a panic attack herself, she should never have written this stuff down, what if she ended up in a gossip magazine?

“I-I was looking for your eyeliner,” the woman stuttered, hiding her head in her hands. “It fell out, I didn’t--I mean,”

“You can’t tell anyone,” Demi said flatly.

“That’s not--I just saw his name in it.”

Demi’s eyebrow raised. “That’s all? Look, I’m not mad, I just--”

“I thought it was...like...for him or something I don’t know what I thought!” she wailed, her face pinched in genuine anguish and fear as she looked at Demi. “Demi, I’m so sorry, I gave it to him, I--”

Demi’s entire body went numb. “You gave this,” she said with a strange calm, “to Simon Cowell?”

“He brought it back,” she whispered lamely, collapsing onto the couch. “I don’t know if he read it. Demi, I-”

“Of course he read it, it’s Simon,” Demi returned, annoyance creeping into her voice. Her emotions were a mess that she couldn’t begin to untangle, embarrassment and fear and an inexplicable tendril of hope and relief that at least now he knew.

And in the middle of it all, her assistant was sitting there crying on her couch. That at least, was a problem Demi knew how to fix. She wasted no time in walking to the girl to give her a tight hug. “It’s fine,” she said softly, a note of weariness in her voice. “I’m not mad about it, you didn’t know. Just don’t say anything about it, and we can forget about the whole thing.”

The woman sniffed and nodded resolutely. Looking over her shoulder while she continued to hug her, Demi made a frustrated face at the wall. Well, if nothing else, her flight out tomorrow morning was early enough that she could quite literally just escape the country before there was any chance of having to see Simon again. Ever again. If the sheer embarrassment of the whole situation didn’t just kill her first.

***

Demi sighed heavily, shuffling barefoot through her hotel room with nothing but a long tshirt on and a toothbrush still stuffed in her mouth. The jetlag and the adrenaline of her performance, and seeing Simon again, followed by all of that nonsense with the damn book was catching up to her, and she just wanted to crawl in bed and crash for as long as possible before her flight.

A soft knock on her door startled her, and she let out a muffled groan around the toothbrush. She loved her team so much, and did appreciate everything they did for her, but couldn’t it wait? Whatever it was, surely it didn’t need to happen right now?

Wearily, Demi opened the door, not bothering with her state of undress. Then, hastily, she yanked the toothbrush out of her mouth before dropping it entirely, a blush already reddening her cheeks. “Wha-what are you doing here?”

Simon looked uncharacteristically uncertain as he stared at her, his eyes flicking over her habitually while Demi yanked the hem of the tshirt down, shifting his weight in the hallway. He was still wearing the dark sweater and jeans he’d had on at the live show, and it didn’t particularly look like he’d been sleeping much.

“Simon?” she prompted cautiously.

He started slightly, finally meeting her eyes. “Can I come in, doll?”

“Uh-huh--yeah,” she stuttered, feeling exceedingly stupid as she moved aside and held the door open wider for him.

She was being ridiculous, he’d seen her in far less before. He’d seen her with a toothbrush before. Even reading that book wouldn’t be the first time he’d heard an ‘I love you’ from her. They’d done this all before.

And that was the problem, really. Before. Before everything went to hell and her heart got broken and he became a father and they lost each other.

“Demi, I--”

“I’m sorry--”

They both stopped, smiling awkwardly, and Simon nodded to her. “You go first.”

She looked down at the plush hotel carpet between her toes, avoiding him. “I just...I heard about the, uh, mixup with one of my things backstage today. I wanted to apologize. She didn’t mean to, and, uh, if I made you uncomfortable…” she trailed off. Part of her wanted to just say, it was a therapy exercise! But she didn’t want to imply that he’d sent her back to therapy.

“Forget about it, Dem,” he said simply, and Demi tried not to feel hurt. It was good he was brushing it off, right? But some part of her still wanted him to acknowledge her words, still wanted him to sweep her back off her feet. Be realistic, Demetria.

“I just wanted to give you this,” he was saying, and she blinked, watching him extend an envelope to her. “I thought you should have it.”

She cocked her head to one side, curiosity overtaking her as she accepted the slim envelope, their fingers just barely brushing in the transaction. Demi, it read on the front, in his familiar handwriting.

She looked up at him uncertainly. “What--do you need me to open this now?” It had to be a contract or something. Something about her performance, something for the show, hell, maybe even an NDA after that stupid book.

Simon shrugged. “If you like. Fair’s fair.”

Demi made a face at his cryptic reply, scowling slightly. He could still frustrate her as much as ever. “O..kay,” she said slowly, belatedly realizing she was still holding the toothbrush in her left hand. She discarded it carelessly on the bedside table, before slipping her finger beneath the seal and ripping it open.

Instead of a contract document, or any other kind of formal paperwork she was expecting, Demi pulled out a simple lined sheet of paper, folded in thirds and covered in his familiar handwriting. Apprehensive, she glanced over the top of it as she unfolded it. “Simon, what--” she trailed off as her eyes caught onto a few random words, and she hastily started reading, not daring to hope.

Demi,

Someone asked me about you in an interview today. I didn’t even answer the question, i didn’t know how to begin to explain.

I can’t call my son a mistake, darling, I know you’ll understand that. But if there were a way for me to take everything back and still have Eric, I’d do it in a heartbeat.

I know it ended so badly. I know how much pain I caused you, believe me. I’m so sorry, Demi, and if it’s worth anything I’m not really happy either. I don’t have an excuse, and maybe it’s better this way.

I never loved her, Demi, I still don’t. Lying next to her is just a reminder of unpleasant memories so I’m here instead, writing words to you that you will never see.

You were the brightest angel in my life and I have no one but myself to blame for losing you.

You’re three years sober today, and I couldn’t be more proud of you. You have always been stronger than I could comprehend and you amazed me every single day, brat, not least by your ability to be the most annoying person in the room.

I love you so much, baby. And now it’s time for me to let you go.

Simon

Demi slowly lowered the letter, her lips wobbling as tears spilled over her eyes to roll down her cheeks. “Simon,” she choked out, unable to say anything but just his name.

She met his eyes for an instant, full of more emotion than she thought she’d ever seen, and then he crossed the distance between them in two short strides and kissed her hard, sliding one hand into her hair and holding her like he thought she was about to evaporate.

She pushed herself onto her toes, cursing her shorter statue, and let the letter fall down between them as she wrapped her arms around his neck in return, her tears still falling and getting his cheeks wet too.

His tongue brushed over her lips and she parted her mouth for him, her soft sobs fading as the kiss turned into something more passionate, something she’d been missing for so long. Simon’s hands moved down to her hips to lift her as she wrapped her legs around his waist, and for once in her life Demi didn’t even stop to worry if she was too heavy for him. She had always been beautiful in his eyes, perfect just as she was.

He threw her down on the bed and she squeaked softly before bursting out into soft laughter, holding her arms out for him to join her, sitting up to help him pull the t-shirt off her head.

“I’ll give you one of mine,” he muttered against her lips, discarding it into a corner. Demi just laughed again, running one hand down his chest to find the button to his jeans while the other slipped into his short hair.

“Shut up and make love to me, Simon,”

***

Demi had never regretted an early flight more than she did that morning. But there was nothing for it; if she didn’t get up someone would come looking and maybe it was better this way. Maybe they still needed some space to figure out what they were now.

But he looked so absolutely peaceful sleeping there, and she was utterly at home with his arms wrapped snugly around him. Biting her lip, she started trying to wiggle out of his embrace, but he only shifted against her sleepily and hugged her tighter.

Demi sighed regretfully. “Simon,” she whispered. “Si, I have to go.” She propped herself up on one elbow, yawning widely, and laid her hand on his cheek, trying to wake him up enough to reason with him. “Simon,”

She’d forgotten how much he hated getting up in the morning. “Simon, you have to let me go.”

“No,” he returned clearly, and she wondered if he was actually awake and just being obstinate on purpose. Then he mumbled, “Love you,” and she figured he was probably still asleep, probably thought she was just trying to slip out before she had to face the morning after.

“Simon,” she begged. If she wasn’t up and out the door soon, her team would come looking. And they would find him, and there would be hell to pay. “I have a flight,”

“No,” he returned again, and she huffed in irritation, resorting to forcefully pulling herself out of his hold.

That did wake him up, and he sat up blearily, blinking around the still dark room and looking at her with a hurt expression on his face. “Where are you going, baby?”

Demi winced, wiggling into a pair of leggings, and pouted at him. “Back to L.A. My flight is really early, Simon, I’m sorry.”

She watched his face shutter off and he laid back down, slinging an arm over his eyes and proceeding to ignore her, obviously hurt and trying not to show it. Demi’s heart broke all over again, and she climbed back up onto the bed on her knees, still wearing just a pair of leggings and her bra.

“No, Simon--stop it--” she paused to pull his arm away from his face. “I agreed to that flight before I knew I was going to see you, I can’t justify changing it now, I’m not trying to leave you--”

Giving up, she just leaned down to kiss him, trying to convey all of the feelings she couldn’t explain in the touch of her lips to his.

And when she sat back, satisfied for the moment, and went back to getting dressed, he was well on his way back to sleep. She smiled at his silhouette in the bed, shaking her head, hating to leave him there but still feeling lighter than she had in years.

Looking at the chaos left of their room after last night, she stifled a quiet giggle to herself, struck by sudden inspiration.

Demi grabbed one of the hotel pens out of a container with glass beads, uncapped it, and opened to a fresh page in that leatherbound book that had ended up doing so much for their relationship.

And then she slid a shirt on over her head, grabbed the bag that was hers, blew one last kiss back in his direction, and shut the door behind her.

And when Simon finally woke to the sunlight streaming into the room, confused by hazy memories of a conversation with Demi in the early hours of the morning, the first thing he saw instead of her face was that book on her pillow, propped open with the pen still on top.

Simon --

I’m so sorry to have to leave but I can’t really explain why I’d need to change my flight.

If you notice something’s missing, well, you did say I could have your shirt. Come to L.A. when you want it back. Until then, this book is yours.

All my love,

Your Demi

#dimon #demi lovato #simon cowell #fanfiction #all the letter writing #just for the record #i wrote this way before that one movie

[dent-de-leon]

Because I’ve gotten countless asks and shitty replies on all my posts about this, I’m addressing it right here and now--why I still ship sheith and it’s not “dead,” here we go:

So, let’s get started with the dreaded ages thing that always comes up, just get that out of the way. According to the guidebook, they were 18 and 25 respectively at the start of the series. Shiro hasn’t aged in the astral plane. Since, you know he’s been dead. And it's more or less implied that Shiro has been gone for months, and then they meet Lotor and there's the whole time that conflict plays out, then we fastforward to after he lays low and keith says "Lotor hasn’t been seen for months.” We can infer that more or less a year has elapsed since Shiro’s death/disappearance. Adding in the two year time skip, that puts them at about 21 and 25 respectively. You know, a completely reasonable age difference. 

There’s literally nothing indicating Keith was adopted by Shiro period. You realize the guy was probably like 19/20 around that time, right? No 20 year old is out here going to college and thinking ‘hey, why don’t I adopt a teenager?’ I should know--I sure as hell aren’t. You barely feel like you can take care of yourself and a houseplant at that point, let alone a whole other person. 

People claim that Shiro had the “power” to send Keith back to the home because he was his guardian?? That’s not the case. He vouched for Keith, which is how he ended up in the garrison in the first place. When Keith tells Shiro to just throw him back in the home, he’s referencing something said by the other officer only moments before--the only reason he’s here is because of Shiro. One word from Shiro, and literally the whole thing’s off. Keith has very limited options here, and he knows it. 

Shiro seemed to be a recruitment officer sent to Keith’s school to look for new cadets. We can tell because Keith isn’t in the cadet uniform in that shot--he’s in a school setting in plain civilian clothes. Shiro is standing at the front of the room in his officer uniform, and it seems that the teacher is introducing him as a kind of guest speaker. Then there’s the flashback where he and Keith are standing beside Kogane’s hoverbike, implying that Shiro saw his skill as a pilot firsthand and was determined to get him in the garrison--to secure him a better future. Krolia’s thanks to Shiro is in relation to what we already know--that Shiro was there for Keith when he had no one, that he led him down the right path and changed his life for the better. His “guiding light,” as the show runners have said. 

But then they got older, and it’s very clear their relationship changed. The two are equals from the start of season 1, that much is obvious. Now that Keith is older, he’s able to protect Shiro in turn. In fact, more often than not, he’s shown to be the one caring for Shiro instead of the other way around. He’s the one always running to Shiro’s rescue and saving him from certain doom. Some people are so stuck on the flashback, but it’s painfully obvious that he’s no longer a child--after the time skip, he’s been explicitly referred to as a man. I think Keith looked up to Shiro a lot when he was younger, but now that he’s so much older and they’re closer in age, now that he’s had all this time to ruminate on it--there’s clearly something else there.

And Shiro sees Keith in a whole new light in turn, which is clear when he’s so thrown off by seeing older Keith. “Lance is right. You have changed.” I don’t understand how people can acknowlege two characters can change without their relationship evolving in turn--these have always been dynamic characters, nothing is static. It’s like how people claimed Allura was still annoyed by Lance and wanted nothing to do with him after she explicitly said she enjoyed his company. You can acknowledge that characters’ relationships are subject to change, that they can grow and develop and be organic, and move on. 

People latch onto the brother line and insist I can’t read, but then promptly ignore the fact that Kuron was completely unmoved by it. The thing that actually breaks through to him, that yields a very gutting, visceral reaction--that’s Keith’s breathless admission of, “I love you.” He also looks completely shocked by it, which doesn’t make any sense if this was coming from a familial love context that he was familiar with. 

In this season, sheith also covered a number of timeless romantic tropes reserved for a character’s love interest. The same exact tropes that fans praised as High Romance when they presumed it would be in relation to k/l, but then immediately backtracked to “oh,, it’s just familiar!!” as soon as those plot points were given to sheith instead. Shiro and Keith’s relationship is also shown to directly parallel Kogane and Krolia, as well as Zaggar--both canon romantic relationships. Not to mention the very noticeable korrasami parallel. You know, as if their relationship was designed to be interpreted as romantic. 

This is also literally the one and only declaration of I love you in the entire series, something not even explicitly romantic couples like Keith’s parents or Zaggar have shared. It’s completely unique to Shiro and Keith’s relationship, and holds just so much gravity to it. This isn’t even taking into account that distinctly romantic variations of “love” were used in other dubs, such as the Japanese aishteru. 

Nevermind that it’s common for someone that’s gay to refer to a close friend of the same gender as being “like a brother/sister” to avoid confessing their true feelings. Hell, I’ve done it before. And I’ve seen so many other LGBT people express relating to that aspect of Shiro and Keith’s relationship, that it’s a struck a cord with many other fans like me. 

When you’re talking about wanting LGBT rep--rep that Lauren and Joaquim mentioned they have been working towards and fighting for since the beginning--but then you willfully ignore and tear down the one relationship that’s been built up like that, when you understand that they might not have been able to get the explicit rep they wanted but still demonize the subtle hints of it, when you make actual LGBT fans feel like shit for identifying with this sort of narrative--you’re really missing the point. 

You know what else is very telling? That this was the one episode Joaquim directed himself--he cared so much about Keith and Shiro’s dynamic, he wanted to just go all out and really made the episode his. That’s how much this episode--this dynamic between Keith and Shiro--mattered to him. Here’s some commentary on it:

Marc: “Speaking of credits we’re not used to seeing—Joaquim, you wrote an episode!”

Joaquim: “I did!…Super excited. You know, it’s one of those things that I wanted to do for many, many years now, and finally got to an EP position. I said, ‘Guys, I’m just gonna write one of these things. And, you know—I’m emotionally attached to both Keith and Shiro, and had some ideas on how that episode could play out.”

Marc: “So you’re the one that has to decide how the battle between Keith and Shiro pans out.”

Joaquim: “Somewhat. Along with a consortium of awesome writers, and Lauren, board artists—yeah.”

Lauren: “Everything in animation is teamwork, but it was definitely Joaquim’s brain child. 

Joaquim: “…when you’ve gotta go back and do painful story edits on scenes that you wrote, it feels like somebody’s limbs are getting cut off.” (source)

Let’s also not forget the brother line has been used for a number of relationships that still became canon--Aang and Katara, Ed and Winry, Ginny and Harry, ect. And lastly, before you still want to call me a monster, let’s not forget that the staff supports sheith in a romantic context, and has since the beginning. They also are more than happy to talk about their intimate relationship. But I mean, of course,, the staff must hate us for this, right? Surely, they never intended for this relationship

to be interpreted as

potentially romantic,,

And sure, it could be that sheith will never be canon--or that it will to some degree, but not explicitly--either way, there’s literally no reason to demonize other fans for shipping it. Especially when the staff themselves have always supported it. If you think you need to take the time to comment on every single sheith post that “they’re only brothers!! You’re disgusting!!!” ect, don’t expect the staff to ever support or even tolerate you, becuase you are the reason both they and the fans are feeling alienated, you are the ones continually harassing the staff for just wanting to have fun. Besides, Shiro and Keith already have “the closest relationship” in canon--Joaquim’s words, not mine--and they love one another. Literally nothing can take that away from them, and if LGBT fans see themselves in these characters, who are you to lash out at them for it? 

#sheith #voltron spoilers #shiro #keith #voltron

[liketonybutwithane]

Guys, I haven’t written anything in nine(ish) years. My will to write has been all but squashed out of me.  

But then Good Omens happened and I’m having all these little brain children that are probably some of the same ones the rest of the fandom are having, but if there’s something I have learned in life it’s “if you don’t write it down, you’re gonna forget it!”

So yeah, I wrote these down. 

HP!Good Omens

Aziraphale is a Syltherin pureboood with a distinct interest in muggle theology that he only indulges at Hogwarts

When he was young, his paternal aunt fell in love with, courted and married a Muslim muggleborn witch and she is the one who cultivated his interests. Having no one else to confide in, she told young Aziraphale about her love and how her family studied and followed the 'lord of the skies.' Aziraphale has copies of the Torah, the Qur'an, the Tripitaka, and both the King James Bible and Catholic Bible in his school trunk (the covers are transfigured to look like older spell book editions).

Aziraphale isn't technically allowed to communicate with his aunts, but he does it anyway. He's never understood with the big deal was. Aunt Ophelia basically raised him; why shouldn't he be allowed to speak with her whenever he wants?

He routinely writes to his Aunts Ophelia and Hafiza - they send him presents at Christmas and he always remembers to (with the help of Crowley) convert his wizard galleons into muggle money to send his Aunt Hafiza his donation for her mosque at Eid al-Fitr.

Crowley is a half-blood Hufflepuff. A bundle of sass and snark wrapped in a crispy coating with an ooey-gooey soft-hearted center and a loyalty streak that rivals the length of the Thames river.

Snake animagus Crowley, just imagine - Pseudechis porphyriacus, the red-bellied black snake. He's just so proud of his animagus form!

Raised by a partially-practicing Catholic muggle and pureblood witch, Anthony "Just Crowley!" Crowley knows his catechisms and (most of the important) saints but not much else. He still manages to impress Aziraphale with his St. Christopher (patron saint of travelers) and St. Albert the Great (patron saint of students) medals.

Crowley adores Herbology and Charms. He gets good marks on his Care of Magical Creatures O.W.Ls and of course, nearly gives his Professor a heart attack when he asks if he could raise a basilisk for extra credit?

He keeps to Aziraphale's side when he has rows with his parents. He tells his mum about the glassy hard stares the Slytherins give him when he walks to classes with Aziraphale and knows deep in his heart that Aziraphale is catching all kinds of hell for siding with "that loud-mouthed Hufflepuff who can't pick a side." 

I just have a lot of feelings about Hufflepuff!Crowley and Slytherin!Aziraphale.

NOTE: I know next-to-nothing about Islam or Catholicism and googled and wikipedia’d what is referenced here. If I am wrong or flubbed something, I beg of you, please correct me! Thank you!

~

Ballet&Ballroom!Good Omens

~ Crowley = a danseur working hard to keep his place in [Europe's equivalent to Julliard?] BUT also struggling in keeping himself alive and housed by working the only way he can think of and using his skills

He works as an under-the-table exotic dancer 5 nights a week

He is cheated more often than not by the shifty club owner but it's still more than he could make anywhere else so he keeps his mouth shut and takes the money

He dances as a female persona; his gorgeous lace-front wig (only one or two shades off from his natural hair color) and lace and silk lingerie are some of the most expensive and well cared-for things he owns (aside from his dancewear, obviously)

He only dances - no private shows, no client requests, nothing that could possibly compromise his identity and thus his place at school

~ Aziraphale = a fair-to-middling ballroom competition dancer from a wealthy family who accidentally trods on his partners toes once or twice but always apologizes profusely

Naturally, Aziraphale has no rhythm. (He knows the mechanics and kinesiology of the ballroom dances but can't make his limbs cooperate.) The only way he is as good as he is now is because he learned to keep time with iambic pentameter in his head. Mostly Shakespeare, but he hasn't told a soul - and he probably never will.

He enjoys dancing. He can keep time by retelling himself the great works of Shakespeare or Milton or Chaucer. It’s his dance partners who he finds lacking. They are haughty and pinch-faced. This should be fun! 

For some possibly (hysterical? ungodly? trippy?) reason [omg, Gabriel is totally shitfaced in the men’s room , Aziraphale ends up at Crowley’s club and that goes about as well as expected, what with the blushing, stammering and exaggerated averted gaze. That is until he first glimpses Crowley (as his dancer persona) and, as a student of kineisology and someone who has fought tooth and nail to control his own limbs, is floored by the mastery of control and discipline the dancer on stage displays over their body.

Aziraphale is mildly besotted, to say the very least...

~ 

High school!Good Omens

This is just me wanting to have Nanny Ashtoreth and Brother Francis play parents to Aziraphale.

Aziraphale is the only child to missionary-religious-scholars. They were less interested in raising the child and more in there efforts of spreading the ‘word,’ so Nanny and Brother Francis in essence raised him.

Mostly Aziraphale dealing with benign neglect from his biological parents and Crowley dealing with hardships and grief from either shitty foster homes or being some kind of scholarship student in a boarding school for old-money families. 

(I know, I always put Crowley in shitty situations! I’m sorry!)

~ 

I really wanted to write a fic where God chooses to inhabit a human to express Her approval of Aziraphale and Crowley.

At first, Aziraphale was a little cautious of the street performer taking up residence across from his shop. But she simply sings (quite well, mind you) and plays her instrument from roughly 10 to 5 every day then goes about her way.

The song I really wanted to focus on is Sinners by Lauren Aquilina. [x]

Like:

Aziraphale is sitting with Crowley in companionable silence and the lyrics drift over him. And he listens.

Then he feels the need to get up and look out the stop door. There, he sees it. Faintly, through the shine of sun beams and dust motes and drifting London smog, are wings. Multitudes of feathers and shining eyes and Aziraphale can't look away. His eyes slide to look the woman in the face and he can feel tears begin to creep from crease of his eyes to trickle down his face.

Her voice rumbles through him, as gentle and powerful and awe-inspiring as it had been at the wall, "Aziraphale." He can barely catch the breath he doesn’t even need.

And the woman glances up from her instrument and Aziraphale gasps. She smiles as though she heard him. The woman strums one last note on her instrument, inclines her head in a gracious nod and then is gone.

Crowley appears from somewhere behind Aziraphale, and asks what's gotten him so upset. Aziraphale splays a hand over his own chest, above his pounding heart, and sighs tearily. Then he half-turns and crushes Crowley in a tight hug. "Nothing. Nothing at all, my dear."

#crowley #aziraphale #good omens #good omens au #ballet!good omens #ballet au #harry potter!good omens #harry potter au #high school!au #slytherin!aziraphale #hufflepuff!crowley #ineffable husbands #they belong together in any universe #god ships it #ballroom dancer aziraphale #ballet dancer crowley #exotic dancer crowley #awkward aziraphale #im horrible to crowley sorry #maybe i'll write these #maybe not

[samtheflamingomain]

survivor: edge of bullshit

I’ve been a Super Fan of Survivor since I was 6 years old and the first season aired. I actually re-watched season 1 for the first time since I was 6 a while ago.

But I want to talk about season 38, which just wrapped on Wednesday. 

If you’re even remotely aware of the Survivor fandom, you know the reactions to the winner are mixed at best. Spoilers ahead.

I was firmly in camp “Rick will win” as well as “Rick SHOULD win”. There’s a lot of reasons why, but because he didn’t win, I won’t get into it too much.

Chris won. He’s the only Survivor winner to play only 11 days of the game. He spent the other 28 days sitting on his ass doing literally nothing.

This season’s twist was “Edge of Extinction”. After you’re voted out, you can go to this tiny spit of an island with very little food and absolutely NOTHING to do, with the hopes you’ll get back in the game at 2 points: when there’s 13 players left, and when there’s 5 players left.

Rick won his way back into the game at 13, and Chris, who was voted out THIRD OUT OF EIGHTEEN, came back at final 5, making it final 6. 

I have 3 major problems with his win, but first let’s get something out of the way.

He played the cards he was dealt. He made every move he needed to make to win. Yes, he spent 28 days on EoE, but that’s the twist. It was the theme of the game. He had no control over it. If you were voted out and got back in, you’d have done what you needed to do to convince 13 jury members that you deserved to win too. If you don’t think he deserved to win (and I don’t think he did), that’s a problem to take up with production, fucking up the season with this twist.

But, and this is extremely important, he was GIVEN an immunity idol at FINAL SIX. That, to me, is unforgivable. Why production thought this was a good idea is beyond me. You won your way back into the game, that should be reward enough.

ALSO, he didn’t really need that idol. Rick was a massive threat that everyone had been trying to get rid of for nearly half the game. 

Secondly, Chris is the SOLE reason that Victoria was voted out. He came back from EoE, joined the final 5, and told them straight up that the jury (those who lost their chance at getting back in the game) that Victoria was going to get their votes. This led to her being voted out. I truly believe that if that didn’t happen, she would’ve won.

Finally, Kelley told everyone at EoE that Lauren had an idol. Chris used this knowledge to get her to flush the idol on him when he knew he wasn’t in danger of going home anyway. He played her, and the only way he could’ve done that is because Kelley is a fucking dumbass. Lauren had NO PART in her being voted out, yet the first fucking thing she said when she got to EoE was “Lauren has an idol”. Fuck. Her. 

(I’ve always hated Kelley Wentworth from the first time she played. She’s a terrible player with absolutely no concept of strategy, and if you think otherwise, you’re a complete idiot who doesn’t pay attention. Bitch walked home with an idol in her pocket TWICE. She is not a competent player and I don’t understand why she’s been brought back three fucking times. I hope we never have to see her again.)

Again, Chris played with what he had. And I do believe that, if it had been anyone else who’d gotten back in the game, they too would’ve used all the info they gathered on the Edge to their advantage. So again, it’s a matter of hating the game, not the player.

This season was an absolute mess. The edit was terrible, the finale was entertaining but unsatisfying, and, in the end, I couldn’t tell you a single fucking thing about Chris. Because he was only onscreen for, literally, 4 episodes out of 14. 

I realize that the editors must’ve been losing their minds when it came to how to piece together this season. But they fucked up, bad. They gave ten times as much screen time to the losers that didn’t even make final 3 than they did Julie, Gavin and Chris. And of that final 3, Julie and Gavin had waaaay more screen time than Chris.

Here’s how they should’ve done it: EoE ends at the merge, OR, final 8 or final 7. To bring back this guy nobody remembers in the finale, in ONE EPISODE, was a massive error, and it will easily put this season in (at least my) bottom 15. 

I don’t put a lot of stock into Edgic (the concept of trying to determine the winner based on how visible and positive their content is, how many confessionals they get, etc.) but it has been largely correct in seasons past.

If I had to guess, less than 10% of people who watch Survivor religiously would’ve guessed Chris would win. And for casual viewers? They probably left the finale going “who the fuck is Chris??” and I wouldn’t blame them one bit.

It was very entertaining television to watch Rick. But when he made final 4, I knew he wasn’t going to win. I couldn’t possibly have forseen Chris giving up his immunity at final 4 to defeat Rick at fire - I thought Gavin would beat him - but I have to admit, being the first survivor to give up final immunity and then winning fire... that’s one helluva move, and I’d argue, one that made him the best of the final 3.

Gavin played a solid game. It was pointed out that he almost always voted correctly, and never received even one vote against him in 39 days. Julie, sorry hun, but you were an emotional wreck and an absolute goat. You made 0 interesting moves and you’re a very annoying person to watch. That’s why you got 0 votes at final. And FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, “Etsy Shop Owner” is not a fucking job. You are a mother who makes shitty crafts. (In case it’s not obvious, I have no respect for her game whatsoever.)

I’m glad Gavin did get some votes; if it’d been a runaway for Chris I’d be pretty pissed. I’m already kinda salty that he did win, because of the simple fact that he ONLY PLAYED THE GAME FOR 11 DAYS. I’d actually have been more satisfied if Reem had won the challenge and then won the game, because at least she has a vibrant personality and stayed on the Edge for an astounding 33 days.

But I think my biggest problem is this: last season, David vs. Goliath, a David won. Just like the myth. Perfect for encapsulating the theme of the season. Then, encapsulating the theme of THIS season, an EoE returnee won. If a Goliath had won last season it would’ve been unsatisfying. 

But this season, if a non-returnee had won, it wouldn’t have negatively effected the twist of the season. In my opinion.

The one thing that completely ruined this season for me was giving Chris an idol at final 6. And if I’m being honest, Rick probably ruined his own game by giving Chris back his half of the immunity idol. Yeah, they had a relationship, but this is a game, and Rick should’ve seen that giving Chris immunity at final 5 was a mistake. Look at all the winners past: a lot of them did a good amount of backstabbing. And I have absolutely no doubt in my mind that, if Rick was sitting at final tribal, he would’ve won with 13 votes.

I’m not saying he was robbed - he sealed his own fate - but because there were 16 people left in the finale... it screwed things up. 

Anyway, I’ve rambled enough. Even though I thoroughly hate the theme of season 39, let’s hope it’s better than the carnage we witnessed this season.

Stay Greater.

#survivor #survivor 38 #edge of extinction #sam