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moonlightdreamzz · 5 months

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FOR LIFE — Choi Yeonjun

SUMMARY ✰ You don’t want to bother your ex-boyfriend, Yeonjun, but in the midst of intense heartbreak and questioning why the ones you love always leave you, you have no choice but to invite him over to help you make sense of it.

GENRE ✰ Ex!Yeonjun, Firstlove!Yeonjun, ANGST

🎧 �� For Life by EXO

You swipe down on your phone to check the time, which reads 10:00PM.

Your lower lip is practically bleeding from how hard you're biting it, all because of the nervousness you feel as you hover over Yeonjun's phone number. You know you shouldn't reach out to him, even though the last time he saw you, six months ago, his lips planted a delicate kiss on your forehead and he assured you that you could call him whenever you need him.

It’s selfish though, is it not? To interrupt whatever peace he’s gained since the two of you broke up, all because you haven’t been able to find your own? A year and a half has passed, and based off of the scraps of his life he’s allowed you to have through social media, he seems so much better off. He’s constantly traveling, glowing, and you know him—he’s way too beautiful and perfect to not have replaced you by now.

“Fuck it.” You utter. With a shaky thumb, and a quivering voice, you press the call button. You have no clue whether he’ll pick up the phone for you. All you know is that more than anything, you need to hear his voice, and as your first love, and the only ex you don’t absolutely despise, he’s the only person qualified to assist you in this moment.

You’re sitting on the floor in-front of your bed in fetal position, rocking back and forth to the sound of the phone ringing. After three rings, it stops, and so does your heart for a second. Did he send you to voicemail? He probably did. I mean, you would've sent yourself to voicemail if you're being completely honest.

“Hello?”

His voice is clear and unwavering, and now you're frozen in place. Your mouth opens and then closes repeatedly, but words refuse to come out of your mouth and you aren't sure why.

"Hello? Y/N? Maybe she called by accident." He mutters. You hear him getting out of his chair in his studio, the squeaky sound instantly reminding you of all the times you curled up into his lap, content as long as you're with him, but silently wishing he'd give it up for the night and take you home so the two of you could sleep.

“Um, it’s me. Me, as in Y/N. Wait—you know that already.”

You start to relax a little when you hear his consoling chuckle that he uses when you're amusing him. “You don’t think I deleted your number, did you?” You don’t have to see him to know that his left brow has raised teasingly.

“Well it has been a long time.”

“It doesn’t matter how much time has passed. I told you that you can call me whenever. I’m always going to care about you.”

You know he’s a saint—everybody does, but it still catches you off guard every time. His tone is so genuine, and you can hear his the confident smile he’s wearing on his face. He knows he has you feeling all warm and fuzzy inside, holding in your squeal of excitement that you would totally let out if he wasn’t still on the other line.

“Thanks.”

“Is that all you called for? To hear my voice? I didn’t know we were allowed to do that.”

Your eyes shut, and without regret, you slap yourself on the forehead. God, why is he still so good at taking your breath away? “No.” You sigh, “I just—I really just…ugh.”

“Take your time.” He coos.

“Yeonjun.” You wine, a shy hiccup escaping your throat.

“Okay, I’m sorry. It’s just so easy to tease you. What’s wrong?”

“If I’m being honest, I’m a mess.”

“You’re not a mess, Y/N. Don’t say that.”

Had this been a few months ago, you’d stop him right there, asking him if you’re truly not a mess, why didn’t he stay? But that would ruin the mood, wouldn’t it? You hate how quick your emotions change. You were happy to hear his voice—enjoying your nostalgic back and forth, but now your entire body feels icky and tears are welling up in your eyes.

“Well something isn’t right, because I keep giving my all to people and they keep sucking the life out of me and leaving.”

Silence.

“Can I come over?” He says. You don’t know whether to be surprised or not. You know him—he probably felt a rush of guilt from your subtle, but sharp words. Guilt is what you believe kept the two of you together as long as you were. You really don’t know the truth, because all he said when he broke up with you is the cop-out “I’m too overwhelmed” instead of saying what it really was.

“I mean—yeah, of course. But you don’t have to. You actually can hang up and pretend I never called if you want. This is weird anyways for you I’m sure.” You force a laugh to try and lighten the mood, and he mimics you.

“I owe it to you. I’ll be over in like thirty minutes.” Is all he says before hanging up.

The room suddenly feels both emptier and warmer after Yeonjun's promise to come over. You take a deep breath, a mix of relief and apprehension settling within you. The rhythmic ticking of the clock becomes more pronounced as you gather your thoughts, realizing the gravity of what you've just set in motion.

After what seems like an eternity, a soft knock interrupts the silence. You hesitate for a moment before getting up, your legs feeling like jelly. You open the door, and there he is, Yeonjun, with that familiar reassuring smile.

"Hey," he greets, his eyes reflecting genuine concern.

Ah, there it was. The paralyzation of your mind and mouth whenever your orbs greeted each other. It didn’t matter how long you prepared your words, everything always disappeared when he was in-front of you. What did you invite him over for again?

You manage a nervous laugh, realizing the irony of the situation. "I think I invited you over to... discuss life, or maybe just to remind myself what it feels like to have someone who understands." You slowly back away from the door, which allows him to step in. Flashbacks of him being nose to nose with you try to creep in, but you’re still fighting.

Yeonjun smirks, his eyes holding a playful glint. "Well, I'm here for both, and anything else you need. Discussing life is kind of my specialty."

The room settles into a comfortable quietude, filled only with the soft hum of distant city sounds. Yeonjun's presence brings a warmth that transcends the physical space, as if the air is charged with the shared history between you two.

"Can I sit?" Yeonjun questions softly. He refuses to look at the couch, and you wonder if it’s because he can’t help but be reminded of every kiss, touch, and comfort the two of you have shared on its worn cushions.

You nod, giving him permission as you try to read the emotions flickering in his eyes. He chooses a spot on the floor instead, perhaps opting for a neutral space that doesn't carry the weight of history.

The silence stretches for a moment, both of you enveloped in your thoughts. You can't help but steal glances at him, the playfulness from earlier replaced by a quiet contemplation. The ghost of a smile tugs at his lips, hinting at the shared nostalgia.

“So.” You utter.

“So.” He repeats.

“I uh—you’re my first love.”

"I know," he replies softly, a mixture of understanding and a hint of regret in his voice.

"My first... everything," you remind yourself in the moment, the vulnerability in your words echoing the raw emotions that brought him to your apartment tonight.

Yeonjun shifts on the floor, adjusting to the weight of your confession. "I remember," he says, his tone gentle. "It's not something you easily forget."

A bittersweet smile plays on your lips as you recall the shared moments that shaped your past. "You left, though. You left me wondering what was wrong with me."

He looks down, his fingers absentmindedly tracing patterns on the floor. "Y/N, I didn't leave because of you. It was me, my own issues. I didn't handle things the way I should have."

Your eyes meet his, searching for sincerity in the depths of his gaze. "But it felt like I wasn't enough. Just like now, with someone else. I keep wondering if there's something inherently wrong with me."

Yeonjun sighs, a heavy exhale that carries the weight of shared struggles. "Y/N, it's not you. You're not the problem. Sometimes people leave not because of who you are, but because of where they are in their own journey. It took me a while to understand that."

You take a deep breath, the truth settling in your chest. "I just wanted you to know... why I called you tonight. It's like history repeating itself, and I needed someone who understands."

Yeonjun's gaze softens, a silent invitation for you to share your story. The weight of unshed tears lingers in your eyes as you begin to unravel the painful narrative of your recent past.

"It's Yuta," you admit, the name carrying a bitter taste on your tongue. "He came into my life when I was convinced I was done with relationships. Said all the right things, made me believe there was something real between us."

Yeonjun listens, his expression a mix of empathy and concern. You trace invisible patterns on your palms, a feeble attempt to anchor yourself in the vulnerability of the moment.

"But the moment I started to like him, he turned distant, hot and cold," you continue, your voice cracking slightly. "It was like he played this game, and I didn't understand the rules. One day he was all in, and the next, he acted like we were strangers."

Yeonjun's jaw tightens, a subtle display of the protective instinct he still holds for you. "He doesn't deserve you," he says, his voice carrying an undercurrent of anger.

The pain in your chest intensifies as you delve deeper into the tangled web of emotions. "I thought I was over these insecurities, that I could move on. But it hurts, Yeonjun. It hurts to feel like I'm not enough, like no matter how hard I try, someone will always find a reason to leave."

Tears threaten to spill over, and you look away, hoping to hide the vulnerability etched across your face. The room feels suffocating, a reminder of the cycles of heartache you find yourself trapped in.

But the echoes of Yuta's actions linger, reopening old wounds and casting shadows on the love that once bloomed in this very room. The irony of finding solace in the person who was once the source of your joy is not lost on you, and the weight of it all presses heavily on your shoulders.

In a desperate attempt to redirect the overwhelming emotions, you turn to Yeonjun, your voice trembling. "Why did you leave, Yeonjun? Was it me? Am I too much, too clingy? Not pretty enough? I need to understand."

Your words spill out in a frantic torrent, the questions forming a chaotic symphony in your mind. The room seems to close in as you anxiously await his response, fingers twisting together in a silent plea for clarity.

Yeonjun's eyes flicker with guilt, a deep-rooted understanding of the pain he once caused you. "Y/N, it's not about you. It never was. I had my own issues, my own demons. I ran because I was scared, and I didn't know how to face them."

"But why?" you press, desperation lacing your voice. "I need to know. I can't keep replaying scenarios in my head, wondering what I did wrong."

He runs a hand through his hair, a gesture of frustration. "It's not about you being too much or not enough. You were everything. It's about me not being enough for myself."

Your heart pounds in your chest, the words sinking in but offering little solace. The uncertainty gnaws at your sanity, and you're on the verge of a breakdown without even realizing it. The fear of inadequacy, the fear of repeating the same cycle with Yeonjun that you did with Yuta—it's all too much to bear.

"I just wanted to be good enough for you," you admit, your voice barely above a whisper. "I wanted to be enough for someone, anyone."

The room hangs in a fragile balance, the unspoken emotions swirling between you and Yeonjun. The weight of your insecurities crashes against the fragile walls you've built, threatening to break you down completely. As you grapple with the echoes of your past and the uncertainty of the present, you find yourself caught in a storm of emotions, hoping that somewhere in this chaos, you can find the answers you so desperately seek.

Yeonjun's frustration simmers beneath the surface, a storm gathering in the calm of his expression. His eyes, once warm, now reflect the turmoil within. He takes a deep breath, his words measured but carrying an edge of exasperation.

"Y/N, I need you to understand," he begins, his tone low but intense. "You didn't make it easy for me to leave. In fact, you were the hardest person to walk away from. But being around you, it felt suffocating."

Your heart skips a beat, the words hitting you like a punch to the gut. "What do you mean?"

He runs his hands through his hair, a gesture of frustration. "You're perfect, Y/N. An angel. I'm not. I never was. Being with you highlighted everything I wasn't. It was like standing next to a light so bright, I couldn't help but cast a darker shadow."

His confession hangs in the air, the weight of his words sinking into the very core of your being. The truth, raw and unfiltered, leaves you speechless.

"And you," he continues, his eyes never leaving yours, "you attract darkness, not because there's something wrong with you, but because you're so full of light. Some people, like Yuta, and every guy before him, they weren't ready for that light. They wanted to take your good energy and use it to mask their own dark souls, leaving you with the shattered pieces."

Tears blur your vision as the truth unravels before you. The ache in your chest deepens, the realization settling in that the very qualities that make you extraordinary are the ones that others find intimidating, overwhelming.

Yeonjun's frustration morphs into a deep sense of regret, his eyes pleading for your understanding. "I wasn't ready for you, Y/N. I was too consumed by my own darkness. It's not about you being too much. It's about me not being enough for someone as pure and good as you."

There’s a silence that’s so sharp, it’s suffocating.

"Why don't you hate me?" he questions, his gaze searching yours. "After everything, after being the first one to abandon you, why don't you hate me like you seem to hate everyone else?"

In the dimly lit room, as the shadows dance across Yeonjun's features, you find yourself captivated by the familiar lines of his face. The subtle play of light highlights the contours, and you take a moment to appreciate the details that you've come to cherish.

His eyes, deep and expressive, hold a universe of emotions that have both comforted and challenged you. You remember the times they sparkled with laughter, the warmth that enveloped you in moments of shared joy. Now, in the quiet of the room, they reflect a mixture of concern and care, amplifying the intensity of your emotions.

You look at him, a myriad of emotions playing on your face. "I honestly don't know, Yeonjun. All I know is that you're the only one I can't get over. The one my mind always takes me back to. I love you, and I don't want to, but I do."

The weight of your admission hangs in the air, and you can feel the vulnerability of your heart laid bare. Yeonjun's eyes widen slightly, registering the depth of your words. His silence carries a mixture of surprise and understanding, and in that moment, you wonder if your hearts are resonating in the quiet space between you.

"Y/N, I never wanted to hurt you like this. Knowing that I'm the one you can't get over, despite everything, makes me feel a thousand times worse."

"Yeonjun," your voice trembles, "is there any part of you that still loves me?"

For a moment, Yeonjun hesitates, his eyes flickering away from yours as if avoiding the intensity of your gaze. The air seems to thicken, anticipation mourning. Finally, he meets your eyes again, his expression a mix of sadness and resolution.

"Y/N, I..." he pauses, choosing his words carefully, "I've loved you, and a part of me probably always will. But it's been a long time, and I've had to accept that you deserve more than I could give you. You deserve someone who won't hurt you, who can give you the love and stability you deserve."

Your doe-like, teary eyes lock onto his, seeking the truth that you've been denied for so long. You can sense the sincerity in his words, and even though the truth stings, there's a part of you that appreciates the honesty you've yearned for.

"Thank you for being honest with me, Yeonjun," you say, your voice barely above a whisper. It's a bittersweet acknowledgment, a painful acceptance of the reality you've been avoiding.

Yeonjun's inner monologue swirls with conflicting emotions as he observes you, the ache in his chest almost palpable. As he maintains his gaze on you, his internal struggle remains concealed behind a veil of remorse. While he acknowledges his shortcomings and the belief that he doesn't deserve you, there's a tumultuous storm of conflicting emotions within him.

I want to kiss her. The thought echoes in his mind like a persistent whisper, each word resonating with a desire that threatens to consume him. As he sees the pain in your eyes, the longing to comfort you intensifies. He imagines the taste of your lips, the warmth of your embrace—familiar sensations that once brought solace and joy.

To fall into her, to sob into her chest. The yearning is raw, a deep ache that transcends physical touch. He imagines the release of tears, the vulnerability of exposing his soul to you. The safety he once found in your embrace feels like a distant memory, and the realization of the chasm between them intensifies the pain.

I wish I could be toxic. The admission lingers in his thoughts, a confession he's never dared to voice. The allure of toxic patterns, the chaos that might temporarily numb the pain, has crossed his mind. But he refrains, acknowledging the destructive consequences it would bring to both of you.

I don't want to disappoint her ever again. The final realization echoes with a profound truth. The fear of letting you down, of causing more pain, holds him back from laying bare the entirety of his emotions. His commitment to your well-being, despite the internal chaos, remains unwavering.

You're too caught up in the sound of your heart breaking to notice the whirlwind in his mind.

Once again, the room falls silent. Neither of you knows what to do or say. Lost in your own thoughts, you both stare through each other, searching for a way through the emotional haze.

Breaking the silence, Yeonjun takes a step closer, his hand reaching out to tenderly caress your cheek. The warmth of his touch sends a shiver through your body, the sensation a paradoxical mixture of comfort and ache. "Goodnight," he murmurs, his eyes holding a depth of emotions he's yet to articulate. "I hope I helped, even a little."

As he turns to leave, the gravitational pull of his departure becomes palpable. The door seems both a physical and emotional barrier, and it's in this charged moment that you act on an impulse you can no longer suppress. Your hand reaches out, grasping his arm, pulling him back towards you.

His eyes widen with surprise, and before either of you can fully comprehend the situation, your lips meet in a kiss that holds the weight of shared history and unspoken desires. The kiss is a magnetic collision, a dance of emotions too long confined. Yeonjun responds immediately, the barriers crumbling as he embraces the intimacy of the moment.

In the heat of the moment, Yeonjun lifts you effortlessly, your legs wrapping around him as he carries you towards the bedroom. The physical and emotional boundaries blur as you lose yourselves in the shared journey, an exploration of a space where the weight of the past can be confronted and, perhaps, rewritten.

Behind the closed bedroom door, the air crackles with intensity as the kiss deepens, becoming a language of its own. Yeonjun's hands explore the familiar landscape of your body, each touch igniting a spark of desire that had long been dormant. The warmth of the room mirrors the heat between you, and as your bodies meld, the boundaries that once confined you seem to dissolve.

With a gentle urgency, Yeonjun lowers you onto the bed, the weight of his body pressing against yours. The layers of clothing become obstacles, and with a shared understanding, you begin to dismantle the barriers that separate you. The room becomes a haven for rediscovery, a sanctuary where past wounds are soothed by the tender exploration of each other's skin.

As you both lie together, catching your breath, the room feels charged with unspoken feelings. In the quiet aftermath, Yeonjun looks into your eyes, and in that moment, you sense a promise of healing and a new beginning. The heaviness of the past isn't gone, but it feels a bit lighter, as if the shared vulnerability and intimacy of the night have carried some of the weight away.

As the stillness settles over the room, a soft plea escapes your lips, breaking the quiet. "Stay, just for tonight," you murmur, your eyes reflecting a vulnerability that has long been concealed. "I want to feel loved, even if it's just for a little while."

Yeonjun, his gaze holding a mixture of understanding and remorse, sighs. The weight of the unspoken hangs in the air, but there's a tenderness in his eyes that speaks of shared pain. In that moment, he reaches out and brushes your braid from your face, his touch a gentle reassurance.

"I can stay," he says somberly, a promise laced with the acknowledgment of the complexities between you. "Just for tonight."

#txt #yeonjun #kpop black reader #txt imagines #yeonjun imagines #txt angst #tomorrow x together #txt yeonjun #kpop ambw #kpop imagines #txt scenarios #kpop x black reader #Yeonjun imagine #yeonjun angst

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xikerhunt · 10 months

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Xikers reactions to you falling asleep.

Ik its been a while but I'll try to post more 🥲

Minjae

This boy would find you so cute and not wanna wake you up. Putting a kiss on your head and rubbing circles on your back to comfort you, your a heavy sleeper so when he pulls a blanket over your body you don't wake up. Just sleep peacefuly.

Seeun

He would poke your cheek with his finger to annoy you but you were a deep sleeper so he would get upset when you didn't even move a muscle but soon just leaves you alone to sleep and eventually falls asleep with you.

Sumin

Sumin would be talking and notice that your not responding or moving. He would just look down and smile seeing you asleep in such a cute way with your lips slightly parted and your head on his shoulder.

Yujun

He would be blabbing about something that happened yesterday and when I tell you that he wouldn't even notice your asleep till after he has had a whole conversation with himself. Then he would look down to see you asleep and smile then kiss your cheek.

Junmin

He would be watching tv then hear soft snores coming from you. When he looks down he sees you asleep with a little drool coming from your mouth. He just laughs and takes you to your bed to sleep comfier.

Jinsik

He would blow in your ear trying to wake you up cause he wants your attention. You would just hit his chest softly earning a chuckle from him then fall right back to sleep making him pout and kiss your forehead.

Hunter

Hunter would notice that your not moving much and think that your either sleep or dead but he hears the snores so he lets you sleep while he hugs your body and kisses you on your head softly.

Junghoon

Would literally fall asleep as soon as he sees that your asleep, pulling a blanket that just sits on the couch over the both of you, the movement would wake you but you fall back asleep when he hugs you tight.

Yechan

Would act like a little baby and want your attention. Kissing you all over your face. "Babyyyy" he would say with a pout but soon just lets you sleep knowing that your a heavy sleeper and that he couldn't wake you if he tried.

Hyunoo

Hyunoo is the type to give you a peck on the lips before falling asleep aswell because of the sleepy atmosphere. He would hold you in his arms not wanting to let you go.

#hunter xikers #kpop ambw #xikers fanfic #kpop #xikers x reader #xikers tricky house #xikers imagines #yujun xikers #sumin xikers #xikers fluff #hunter #minjae xikers #ff #xikers seeun #jinsik xikers #junmin xikers #hyunoo xikers #yechan xikers #junghoon xikers

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hoonsangel · 3 months

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paring: yang jungwon x reader

genre: angst (look…. im sorry.)

wc: 1.02k

a/n: i have no excuses its been a year since i updated this account and i swear haven’t abandoned red card i just lost inspo but it will be coming back soon :(

Convenience. That's all this was. Just convenient.

At least that's what you both called it. He was always there and so were you. Catching the others stare across a room, an intentional touch of the hand, a swift text, was all it took for your agreement to activate. To be there, whether that’s as a listening ear or a fix you would come running. You always told yourself you could quit if you wanted to. You didn’t need him and he didn’t need you. That was the deal, if either of you felt like this was no longer a deal of convenience, it ended. You were sure it would never be you. The life of an idol was too busy you had schedules, tours, and practice. How could it work? You’re sure he felt the same way, maybe even 10x more. He was the leader of his group risking everything for convenience would be stupid. you couldn't blame him. Passing him in the company halls was torturous enough with the longing glances. Your members had started to notice you looked far off at practice when you were usually the most focused, a perfectionist. They would talk to you and tried to gauge your mind but it was futile when all you responded with were “ I'm fine” “It's nothing” and “I'm just tired”. You tried to tell yourself again it wasn’t the fact you hadn’t seen him in weeks. That you missed his smile, the way he held your hand, the look in his eyes as if you were the only two in the world. It wasn’t that, you were sure, so you kept practicing putting that feeling into the choreography. This comeback was important, your group still had to prove themselves to the company. You didn’t have time to get caught up on a boy.

Your group members left reluctantly pushing you to go home with them and get rest but you refused. You reassured them you’d practice for another hour and head home. That was the plan. Seeing a familiar face wasn’t, you heard his group leave a little after your own. You were sure he went with them. There was no reason for him to stay. And just like before you fell into his embrace. You were stronger than this, there was no way you were submitting this easily. You pushed his arms down taking the chance to finally see the face you had wondered about -- daydreamed about. He looked different. You weren’t sure how or what but one thing was the same. The look in his eyes was the same; it made you feel as if it was only the two of you in the room. The one that made you realize this was no longer convenient for you. It was burdensome. The thought of not only bringing down your own group but his as well because you couldn’t handle this just being a passing moment in your life.

You had the words, you thought about exactly what you’d say to end this doomed affair. But as you stared into his eyes nothing but tears filled your own. Sinking down to the practice room floors you let your tears flow freely. Everything you had held back came rushing forward. You feel the soft palms of his hands touch your face. He wipes away the heated tears staining your cheeks. You keep your head down knowing if you lift your head you’d break even more. “We can’t keep doing this” you finally push out

“What? Y/N look at me.” shaking your head you continue “No, Jungwon I broke the rule…I broke it so long ago.” “Y/N-” You could hear the pity in his voice and it hurt, it hurt so badly you wanted to rewind time and take your words back. Oh how you wish you never said anything but you know this was the best outcome for the both of you. “I’m sorry, I know I promised. I'm sorry, I'm so sorry. You were crying harder than before. You thought about all of your secret rendezvous, never daring to go further than a long embrace. If you think about it seems you both were always too afraid to blur the line anymore than you already had. The silence was long, suffocating. Your tears dried up leaving you with a dry throat. You're not sure how much time passed, you weren’t even sure if Jungwon was still there. Refusing to possibly make contact with him if he was. You were sure you’d sit there in the stuffy practice room forever if it meant you wouldn’t have to face him. He broke the stiff silence “How long?” his voice as soothing a you remember it “What” you croak out still hoarse from crying for who knows how long

“How long ago did “this” stop being an agreement for you”

“Wonie- Jungwon-”

“Please Y/N just tell me”

“I'm not sure…since the beginning? Near the end? I'm not sure. Why can’t you just let me go?”

“I don't want to let you go. Why should I.” His voice is still as stable as ever “can’t i be selfish for once?”

You looked at him for the first time since the start of the conversation “What aren’t you getting? Jungwon, feelings are involved somewhere they never should have been. It’s not worth it.” You blurted. You tried to ignore the hurt in his eyes. Jungwon always held all his emotions in his eyes. It was easy to tell when he was happy, angry, sad, and concerned. You loved it but right now you wished you couldn’t see how your words affected him. Maybe it would give you more backbone.

Regret instantly filled your body as you watched him stand to his full height and leave the room. He said nothing. The sting of your words hit you. It was really over. You’re not sure how long you stayed there that night or how you went home. It was a blur. How you wish the memories of his hurt face would be too. But it sat there every time you closed your eyes. You were reminded of how you caused his pain.

#yang jungwon #jungwon x reader #enhypen ambw #kpop ambw #jungwon #enhypen angst #jungwon angst #enhypen

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nirvanawrites111 · 11 months

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Ummm Hwa with a grill?? Baby listen i need me a lil hood gangteez fic / smutty oneshot with a black reader in mind. Where the black atinys at?? Also, MDNI pls and thank you.

#seonghwa #ateez atiny #ateez x black reader #ambw smut #ambw bwam #kpop ambw #seonghwa x black reader

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neosculturestechnology · 1 year

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[#] 𝐒𝐄𝐗𝐓𝐀𝐏𝐄.

𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: 𝐩𝐰𝐩, 𝐟𝐢𝐥𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐠, 𝐜𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐦𝐩𝐢𝐞, 𝐩𝐞𝐭 𝐧𝐚𝐦𝐞𝐬.

word count: 0.9k

𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: 𝐣𝐮𝐧𝐠 𝐣𝐚𝐞𝐡𝐲𝐮𝐧 𝐱 𝐛𝐥𝐚𝐜𝐤!𝐟𝐞𝐦!𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

The male was rather anxious and he didn't understand why, all of this was nothing new to him. He guessed the anxiousness came from waiting for you to walk out of the closet. He knew you'd look good in the new lingerie he brought for you, and he wanted to fuck you in it now.

"I feel like a child on Christmas morning, waiting to unwrap a nice present," he joked, patting his lap.

"Well you told me to build the suspense..." you shouted from the closet.

"Alright... Then I have an idea..." his voice trailed off.

"Why don't we film it? Film this..." it was quiet for a bit. Where'd he get this idea from? You had your doubts, but it didn't sound too bad.

"Okay," you took a deep breath in and out.

Jaehyun grabbed his phone and opened the camera. He pressed record and waited, "whenever you're ready baby!" he shouted.

That feeling when your heart is beating out of your chest. Kind of like a cartoon show. Slowly, you walked out of the closet seductively. Sending shivers down his spine, he zoomed in on every part of your body.

All of this wasn't new to him, but he got excited every time you wore lingerie. To him, it suited you very well. There were times where he just wanted to rip it off you and buy you a new set. There were times where he just wanted to see you walking out of the closet naked.

"You're making it hard for me..." he trailed off, lying down on his back.

"Will I make it harder if I did this..." there was a small grin on your face as you began to climb on the bed slowly.

Looking at you through the camera was amazing. If only you could see how hot you looked to him, making him lose his composure.

"I just want to fuck you so bad..." he mumbled, watching you climb on top of his body.

"How bad do you wanna fuck me?" you whispered, sitting right on his dick.

"This bad..." he whispered back, slamming his dick against your clothed pussy.

"Fuck..." you muttered, closing your eyes.

"You were being bold not to long ago... What happened?" and he did it again, this time he placed his phone on the tripod. Propping it up so that he could place both of his hands on your hips.

Lifting you and down on his throbbing cock while you whimpered made him smirk. His lips were now on your neck, placing soft kisses against your skin. But that was just a distraction, because his hands soon lowered to your pussy where he began to rub over your thong.

"Let me hear your whimper..." he mumbled against your neck.

A finger slipped right inside of you, causing a loud 'fuck' to leave your lips. Yet it wouldn't take him long to stick another finger in, thrusting roughly in and out of you. Hearing you whine his name only made him speed up his pace, "I want you inside of me..." you whined, craving his dick inside of you badly.

"Is that why you're cumming so quickly?" there was his grin. He was feeling cocky and once he was feeling cocky, you two would be fucking for hours.

Jaehyun slowly took his fingers out of you, and stuck them in his mouth. The same hand that was near his mouth, made its way towards his dick. He began to rub the tip against your soaked pussy, while you whimpered. Before he could actually start, he grabbed his phone. This wouldn't be a sex tape if he wasn't recording with his actual hands. One hand held his phone while the other held his dick.

Zooming into his dick near your pussy, he slowly thrusted into you. A faint 'fuck' left your lips while he began to thrust himself in and out of you at a slow pace. God, just hearing your moans made him go crazy.

"Something about those moans babygirl..." he trailed off, looking down at you. God you were so beautiful.

His pace began to quicken as your moans grew louder. Sticking a thumb inside of your mouth, his thrust were rough. Slapping against your pelvis, "fuck Jae..." you moaned, while he pulled himself up.

"Get up for a sec..." he trailed off, and you knew where he was already going with this.

You got up and put yourself on all fours. Without letting you know, he slammed himself into you. One hand gripping your ass and the other recording, "Shit baby... I don't think I'll last very long..." he moaned, giving your ass a smack.

When it came to Jaehyun, he became aggressive and rough during doggystyle. This is usually where'd he use majority of his energy and finish inside of you in missionary. Every time he thrusted roughly inside of you a loud 'fuck' left your lips.

"Look at how nice your ass looks on my dick, fuck babygirl..." he groaned, squeezing your ass.

The pace was slowing down, which meant he was ready to cum and thankfully you were too. He removed his dick and watched you turn back onto your stomach, where stuck his dick inside of you again. He had a few more rough strokes in before the two of came together.

"Damn..." he made sure to record the cum dripping from your pussy, "you're so fucking beautiful..." he added, before he stopped recording.

"I can't believe I agreed to that..." you trailed off, getting up from the bed while he walked behind you.

"You better hide that shit good before one of your crazy ass fans leak that shit Jae... And I ain't playin' either," you pointed your finger at him, giving him a stern look.

"I will babe. I will..." he trailed off, terribly hiding his smirk.

⌨ ◠ ⌗stfu tori is speakin' ;; ❞

jaehyun is so fine... like words cannot describe what i want him to do to me fr...

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hatelangdon · 2 years

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Black girls deserve to see themselves in soft aesthetics too. We like Royalcore, Matcha dates, picnics, soft dances, book shopping with our lovers, and even more! We want to be embraced. That's the types of content I'm making <3

#kpop x black reader #black kpop stans #black kpop fans #AMBW #kpop ambw #black tumblr #black fanfiction

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xunolic · 2 years

Text

ten dates: unmatched! (l.cn)

𖥻 . . pairing: non-idol!chan x fem!reader

𖥻 . . wc: 17.9k

𖥻 . . au(s): exes to enemies not really(?) to lovers; rom-com, angst, smut

𖥻 . . summary: once you and chan broke up, you decided to be cordial enough to stay friends with him. however, you’ve finally moved on and are taking on dating again. as you beg chan for advice, you should've known he’d grow tired of it.

𖥻 . . warnings: explicit language, alcohol is mentioned a ton, explicit sexual content, unprotected sex (wrap the willy silly), chan says “pretty girl” quite a bit, he also has a pretty big gratification kink.

a/n: minors do NOT interact! also, reader is race neutral. i finally finished! this was proofread quite a bit, yet there might still be mistakes :\ feedback and reblogs are greatly appreciated! i hope you all enjoy! :))

date one.

it was an ordinary saturday night. people in their early 20s would be out, getting drunk with pals, clubbing with the right people, having one-night stands, yet here you were, decked out in a tight dress and uncomfortable heels in a fancy restaurant with the worst date. the man you got to know on tinder was not who he presented himself to be in real life… obviously. the man, yoon jeonghan, that was supposed to be focused on you had his intentions set on a poor waitress that was oblivious to his advances. it wasn't that he was focusing more on her, it was more so he wasn’t being interested in anything but her, a weird infatuation of sorts. he spared you a glance once or twice, his eyes widening with shock once he, what you assumed, remembered why he was at the restaurant in the first place.

“so have you found anything you wanted yet?” he finally asked, clearing his throat, looking at you with disinterest. it irked you that someone who had invited you out had wasted your time bringing you out of the comfort of your home just to neglect you. once he spoke, you could do nothing but scoff. you stood grabbing your bag as you tucked it under your arm.

“yeah, i want to get out of here. thanks,” you walked away, your red stilettos clicking on the marbled floors. jeonghan sat there confused before standing up to walk after you. you were slightly shocked he had come after you, thinking he wanted nothing to do with you.

“hey!”

“please leave me alone, i’d like to get home n–”

“–you had a cocktail so you know…”

you let out another exasperated scoff, “fuck off.” of course he wasn't coming after you, he’d come to ask for money after that poor excuse of a date.

you stood at a nearby bus stop, tugging your phone out of your small clutch, dialing the number of someone you knew would be there for you during these types of times. it rang twice before you heard the soft voice of your ex, the sound bringing a small smile to your face. “chan.. come over, i’ll order food and whatever drinks you want, just– just come please.”

he had told you that he was hanging out with vernon and seungkwan at some run-down lounge and you opted into going to them. you toed the heels off your feet asking for the address and once he told you, you realized how close you were. you rushed to the location finding him with a hand in his pocket, his other wrapped around the phone he held to his ear. chan had persuaded you to stay on the phone with him until you made it to the lounge, which you argued against, but he didn't take no for an answer.

“i’m here,” you informed through the phone from a building across the street from the one he was standing at. he looked around before his eyes landed on you. chan could've sworn his eyes flew out of his sockets by the way he gawked at your appearance. he’d always thought you looked beautiful in red and wasn't he a smart man to think so. he let the phone drop from his ear as you ran over to him. “hi,” you muttered.

“bad date?”

“please, don't remind me of it,” you chuckled, walking past him to walk into the lounge, smiling as you caught sight of vernon and seungkwan sitting at a table in a near corner of the place.

“woah, i didn't know it was this type of gathering,” seungkwan laughed, standing from his seat to hug you. you hugged him back but pulled away from the hug just in time to steal his seat in the booth beside the wall. “you sly woman.”

you shrugged with a cunning smirk, waving at vernon who was in front of you before you watched chan slip into the seat next to him. seungkwan grabbed the seat beside you, waving over the waiter whose eyes lingered on you for longer than you liked. the stares he was sending soon made you uncomfortable as you shifted in your seat, catching chan’s attention. seungkwan looked toward you as if asking what you wanted, but before you could respond, chan spoke to the male.

“she’ll get a long island iced tea, thanks,” chan said, not sparing the waiter a glance as he looked your way, noting the way you were staring down at the table. “seungkwan, give y/n your jacket.”

you looked toward chan, but his attention was focused on his drink. you felt the jacket cover your shoulders as you looked at seungkwan, saying a quick thank you before glancing back at your ex. he was talking to vernon about something that was too muffled to catch.

if there were three things you learned while being in a relationship with lee chan was that precious things shouldn't be taken for granted, relationships aren't a fairytale, and dating would definitely not last forever no matter how great you acted in front of people. it wasn't that dating him wasn't the best time of your life, it was more like, as weird as it sounds, arguments were a common thing with you two even if you thought being with him was the best. vernon was usually an accomplice to each argument, sitting there until one of you stood up and he had to jump in to calm you both down. you never intended to argue in front of vernon, he usually came to sit in on them making sure neither of you was bold enough to break the other's neck.

chan was a sweetheart, not only to you but to everyone around him. and that smile, dammit that smile of his could melt anyone’s heart. even when you both got out of the cookie-cutter honeymoon stage of your relationship, he still took you on dates, gave you massages, and calmed you through fears of yours, through those two years he was truly the love of your life… or so you thought.

the breakup was messy, probably the messiest you'd ever been through. miscommunication after miscommunication led to both of you lashing out for the final time. vernon wasn’t there to separate you two, he wasn't there to force both of you to come to your senses, and he wasn't there to stop chan from slamming the door of your apartment in your face as you yelled out words you didn't mean. you remember sobbing in your room, alone, with no one to contact. you wanted to call seungkwan, but since he was close friends with chan you knew he'd be there for him instead of you.

you hated lee chan at that moment, you hated the world, as dramatic as it sounded, you hated yourself. ever since that night, you grimace at the way both of you acted that night. it was never talked about again for some reason even a year later, vernon and seungkwan were nonetheless confused when they saw you hanging out with chan again, laughing and giggling together. since it was never brought up, you both spent that time working on yourselves, cliche? maybe.

you finally decided to take on dating, not realizing how hard it was without being in high school around the boy you found attractive. it was the real world where you were forced onto dating apps to talk with random men who varied from sweet to “send nude” guys.

as the waiter sat down your drink, you found a slip of paper underneath the drink as he gave you a wink before walking off. chan caught the wink and looked down at the table, rolling his eyes at the slip of white paper that he knew had the other guy's number.

you picked up the slip of paper, ripping and crumpling it as you stuffed it in your bag. chan gave you an unnoticeable smirk before sipping on his drink.

“okay so, when a guy acts like you don't exist when he’s the one who invited you out, what're you supposed to do then? he's the fucking jerk right?” you asked the group, eyes training on the second glass of liquor you had creating a water circle underneath it.

“absolutely! see, sometimes, dudes can be garbage. take him for example,” seungkwan pointed at a random man who was sleazily brushing up on a woman near the bar. “you can tell she's uncomfortable, right? but guess who doesn't take the hint? him!”

vernon nodded along with seungkwan, taking a shot of vodka, squeezing his eyes closed at the taste. all of you had a substantial amount of alcohol which left you tipsy enough to tell them almost everything that happened on the 30-minute date you went on.

“dating really does suck… i don't know if i want to go through that shit again.”

“you'll be back on one, chan, on the other hand, my guy went on one date, hated it, and never went on one again,” vernon pointed out, leaning his head back against the backrest. chan looked at his hyung, the side of his lip rising in annoyance. chan was only sipping lightly since he was kind of responsible for his friends and you. he sat and listened about how your date went, biting back words he wanted to say about the man you were out with.

the end of the night had come around and you all left the building before you could get one last shot in you. chan had stuffed seungkwan in a cab, seungkwan blowing his hot breath on the window, drawing a heart with his fingers before the cab drove away. since you’d given seungkwan his jacket back, you sat in the chilly weather on a bus stop bench, warming yourself with your hands.

“cold?” chan asked, sitting beside you, vernon following after. you nod, and in no time you felt the jean fabric of chan’s jacket against your shoulders. you grabbed onto it, holding it close before watching the bus pull up. chan and vernon lived three apartment buildings down from you hence why you were both taking the same bus. you stumbled your way onto the bus, absentmindedly walking right past and not paying your bus fee. you heard, “for three.” behind you as you sat in a seat, resting your head on the window.

chan forced vernon to sit beside you as he stood beside the seat, looking at the both of you. vernon was a dazed drunk as he yawned, staring at the seat in front of him and you, you were just tired. you wanted to go home and sleep and forget about everything that happened that night. as the bus came to a stop, you handed chan his jacket back as he turned to vernon.

“walk safe, i’ll give you water when i get home,” chan said. vernon nodded, waving at you before trudging away.

you looked at chan with a pout, “i’m fine enough to walk home myself.” you watched as he looked at his watch, shaking his head as he began walking towards your apartment building.

“it’s almost 2 am… i’m not letting you walk alone.”

you followed behind him until you reached the front of the large complex, waving chan off as he went in the opposite direction. once you finally walked inside of your apartment, you took everything off, plopping on your bed. you went to sleep but not before your phone buzzed.

it’s a match!

you woke up with a mild headache and a burning urge to go shove scorching hot coffee down your throat. as you kicked yourself up from your comforter, you looked over at your window sill, finding the cat that usually perches there fast asleep. you smiled softly walking over, looking at the orange cat rest. you sighed sitting on your knees as you looked over the cat breathing with soft purrs. you sat there for a bit, the sleeping cat relaxing you more than you thought it would. as you stood up, you heard your phone ping over and over again causing a groan of annoyance to leave your mouth. you walked to your phone, picking it up, kim mingyu. you’d found mingyu interesting at first glance: tall, a chef, an art lover, he was a dream.

kim mingyu: hello, i saw we matched! i’d love to get to know you over dinner if you're okay with that :)

cute, you thought, texting him back. you told him you had only now just started texting him so you don't see why he'd want to meet so soon. he told you that he loves speaking to people in person more than anything, and your mind it instantly went to a murderer. you panicked a bit but as if he read your mind, he sent another message to inform you he wasn't a murderer of any sort. you laughed at yourself, telling him you'd meet up with him next friday and he quickly sent a location telling you where he’d be. once you tossed your phone down, it buzzed again.

lee chan: take medicine, drink loads of water, and rest if you need to.

you hated(no you didn't) how sickly sweet this man was. you fell back onto your bed, in hopes of a better date next week.

…

date two.

so, uh, it wasn't.

you walked into the restaurant, hyping yourself up outside before walking in, hell you were meeting a man that seemed different from the date you had last week, you needed a new approach. once you walked in, however, the one who called your name made you internally scream.

you had taken your seat and stared at the male as he scratched his neck awkwardly. you knew him, not as kim mingyu, but as lee minki, the same guy you’d seen the night of your last bad date in the lounge. the same name you had read on the name tag as he served your drink. the same guy who wrote his name on the slip of paper he’d given you with the booze.

“so–”

“i can explain!” he yelled, slapping a hand over his mouth as he saw a few people look over to your table.

you crossed your arms over your chest, rolling your eyes, “what’s there to explain? the only confusion i have is what idiot invites someone out they’ve catfished all week?”

“i saw you! you fucking ripped my number up the night i gave it to you, and i– i heard you talk about tinder dates and i realized you’re the girl i saw on tinder for mingyu, i’m sorry but at the same time i’m not.”

“who’s mingyu?”

“i don’t know… i found him on instagram.”

“yeah, see, no. first off, minki, you stared at my breasts all night that night, secondly, you made me super uncomfortable with all the weird winks, and then you continued to give off the worst fake cockiness. i’m not gonna apologize for not being attracted to you or your actions. so, i’m gonna leave now, please unmatch me from tinder,” you stood up, sending a short wave before walking off. you only walked so far until he grabbed your wrist, squeezing it a little bit too tightly.

“you can’t leave, i… i apologized, i said i was sorry!��

“please don’t do this minki, i need to go and you need help.”

“but–”

you didn’t let him finish as you tugged your wrist away, hurriedly rushing out. you stood at the curb, hugging yourself to warm up, looking over the many people who walked around the streets. “y/n! hey! at least…” minki ran up to you, catching his breath as he bent at the waist. once he stood upright, he looked over your face seeing your scowl. he cleared his throat, shoving his hands in his pockets, yet again masking his nervousness with fake conceitedness. “at least stay for some food, or we could go back to my place and i–”

“please, like i’d want to leave with a lying creep,” you saw your cab pull up as you bid the male goodbye, getting in the car, watching the poor guy sulk as the driver pulled away.

“he did what?” chan asked through the phone, a face mask on his face as he sipped his water.

“catfished me, that’s a first,” you responded, looking in your mirror before looking back at the phone at chan. you giggled softly at the gold sheet mask on his face, the white headband keeping his black hair out of his face. he could barely speak, wanting to keep the mask steady on his face. this was something both you and chan did regularly in your relationship, well when you weren’t arguing. you both would tuck under a blanket, cuddled up with sheet masks on as you ate pizza and watched cheesy rom-coms.

it was simplistic, but you loved every bit of the corny romantic moments you both shared. the lingering stares, the continuous kisses, the phenomenal sex after, all of it had the specialist part of your heart taken.

“are you laughing at me?” he asked, the sound still slightly muffled because of his mumbling.

“oh absolutely, you look funny and i’m not talking about the mask,” you laughed, applying lotion to your face as you walked into your room. “you should’ve come over, i ordered pizza. you could’ve even brought vernon.”

“what kind of pizza?”

“um.. shit… what pizza did i get?”

“dumbass.”

you laughed, sitting on the edge of your bed, tucking your feet underneath you. you sat your phone down on a pillow, watching chan rush to the bathroom to remove the mask. “so, do you want pizza or not?”

he glanced down at the phone, picking it up and showing you his renewed skin, completely ignoring you, “i look so good.”

looking over his face, you tilted your head and responded, “you look okay, i guess.”

“hey! don't forget, if you diss my looks you're the one who dated me.”

“touché.”

he smiled in the frame of the phone camera, and walked to his own room, sitting on his bed.

“so, what about you? are you gonna try dating again?” you ask, carrying your phone to the door to grab your food. as you brought it back to your room, you made yourself comfortable again, flipping the box open.

“eh, i haven't thought about it yet. i was gonna try, but…” he trailed off, watching as you began eating. chan always thought you were cute when you concentrated on food, the way your eyes slightly crossed when you focused on your next bite of anything you had, the way your tongue darted out to clean your lips, he could smoosh your face and just adore you whenever he wanted. well, not now.

“chan.”

he blinked a few times remembering he was on facetime, “yeah?”

“you just trailed off on your sentence. what’s on your mind?”

he shook his head saying it was nothing important, laying back on his bed. you took his word for it and ate enough pizza that filled your need. you and chan talked and talked until you felt tired. neither of you hung up the phone, both growing irritable and tired. chan however kept his eyes on you, adoring the way you laid with your eyes closed and your breaths coming out as gently as they came in. chan was about to hang up so you could sleep peacefully but you ended up speaking.

“what should i do, chan? i thought i was doing the right thing by going on dates like this, but… i keep making mistakes.”

“it's not your fault y/n, it–”

“we even broke up because of me. i keep fucking up,” never once did you open your eyes to look at your ex, but if you did, you'd notice the pained frown on his face. chan never once blamed you for the breakup, even when you two weren't friends. he could easily sympathize with you, knowing how much he blamed himself for the predestined circumstances between you two. the sound of your voice, blaming and putting yourself down hurt chan more than he’d admit. since you were in a slight state of delirium because of your sleepy condition, he cut you off telling you to go on to sleep.

you nodded, saying a small goodnight leaving chan to hang up the phone, losing himself in his own feelings.

date three.

you had no idea why you were there. you tried to understand but it just hindered you.

turns out this new date knew the actual kim mingyu and kim mingyu was a taken man, but why were you here with the two of them? you stood in between the two, staring at the painting in front of you. they were both in the midst of a conversation, the date seeming like it was between them if mingyu wasn't already in a relationship.

“what do you think, y/n?” minghao invited, finally giving you some attention. you weren't really paying attention to either of them as you tried to figure the painting out yourself. you loved art, don't get it twisted, but what the living fuck were you looking at? the paint surely was painted on the canvas, but what were you to make of it.

“i um... i–”

“trees, swaying, almost dancing if you would,” your eyes shot to mingyu’s tall frame, nodding in agreement.

“no, yeah. i was about to say the same thing,” you responded, pointing at the picture in front of you. you crossed your arms in front of you with a secure nod, the two men looking at each other stifling giggles.

“cute,” minghao said before walking to the next painting with mingyu. you got flustered at the sudden compliment, following behind their long strides. you looked over their shoulders, staring at the even more confusing painting, you realized how long this date would be.

once you left the art museum, minghao took you to a nice cafe… but mingyu came along. you were shocked at how hooked to the hip best friends could be, especially to bring the other on a date.

“oh, and what about the time we went to pottery class and your ass kept messing up the teacher’s vases,” minghao laughed, looking at mingyu. mingyu laughed along, slapping his friend's arm. you sat in front of them sipping lightly on your iced coffee, picking at the cake minghao had gotten you. watching them laugh at things you were clueless about made the date quite frustrating. you tried to laugh along, but you soon realized that they were talking about past dates minghao has gone on. mingyu was with minghao every single time he went on a date. your eyes shot from each of them, slipping another bite of the cake into your mouth. they continued to talk between the two of them until you cleared your throat to make your appearance known. their heads flew to you, not at all annoyed, just questioning what you needed.

“hey, i think i’m gonna slip out. i’ll take the coffee and cake with me though,” you smiled at the both of them, closing the container for the cake. minghao was quick to stand, offering to walk you out, but you declined. he was sweet, really sweet, but you could tell his best friend was his top priority. you gave him your number, offering a friendship instead of a relationship, telling him that he’ll find someone willing to go on dates with him and mingyu. he laughed softly, nodding as he watched you walk out.

as you were nearing your place, you left the bus with a stretch. although you didn't have a bad time per se, you didn't want to be alone after. you called up chan, questioning his whereabouts and once he told you he was stuck at home, you took that as an invite to go over to the apartment. you walked into their building, a familiar face spotting yours as quickly as you did hers.

“oh, y/n! hello.”

“ah, miss choi, hello! how are you?” you asked, smiling as you walked to the nearby elevator. miss choi was a nice woman, she loved to greet anyone who was near her door, especially if she had brought in her dog. she had grown a liking to you and you knew she was patiently waiting for you and chan to break up. not because she didn't like chan, she adored the kid, but she had a son that needed a woman.

she told you once when you went over for tea that she had a son, but you were with chan and you instantly shot her down. she didn't take it to heart, seeing how happy you seemed and how comfortable you were with your relationship, but when she saw chan crying the day of your breakup she thought maybe there was a chance. although she cared for chan and his feelings, she was a mother first. she wanted to see her son with a good woman like you.

“i’m good, i’m doing great. are you and chan back together?” she asked, not giving you a second to digest how she was doing. you chuckled a bit awkwardly, shaking your head.

“no, we aren't.”

“oh, you know, my son is still available.”

“now, miss choi, you know i can’t go on a date with him if he doesn’t want to, right?” you pressed the up button for the elevator, feeling slightly relieved when no one was on it.

“but!”

“i’m sorry, i have to go. have a great day.” once you stepped in the elevator, you took a deep breath, scratching your head in frustration. as you got to the respective floor, you made your way down the hall, knocking softly at the apartment door. chan opened the door, the wafting smell of burnt food coming out.

“what the fuck did you burn?” you took your shoes off as fast as you could, pushing past him, as you rushed over to the kitchen. there vernon was, splashing water into the pan, as calm as he could be. your eyes were wide as you sat the iced coffee down and walked to the older man, grabbing the pan from the still-hot stove eye. you held the pan away from you as you turned the heat off of the stove, tossing the pan in the sink you sat your empty hand on the counter looking at him.

“i... i was making sauce for hot wings,” vernon told you, rubbing the back of his neck.

“you took the hot part a little too literally, i fear. i have cake.”

“you went to a cafe without us?” chan asked, making his way into the kitchen, looking at you with a pout.

“i was on a date…” you walked past the two of them, sitting on the couch, still holding out the box for one of them to take. vernon was quick, snatching it from you as he took a seat in one of the side chairs. chan sat beside you, looking at you.

“how was it?” chan asked, leaning back into the couch.

“i mean, it was okay. it would've been better if he didn't bring his best friend and talked to him the whole time.”

vernon laughed awfully loud, beginning to dive into the cake, “his best friend? wow.”

you shrugged, looking at chan who was already looking in your direction, “i’m really not good at this, am i?”

“it isn't your fault,” he said, patting your head softly. the small show of affection made you want to fall for this man all over again. you mentally slapped yourself as you masked any sort of reaction with a pout.

“you keep saying that, but i’m the one who keeps choosing to go on dates with them.”

“everyone deserves to go out, you just haven't found the right person to do that yet…” vernon nodded to chan’s words, tossing the empty box on the coffee table. you thought that you had what you needed in the beginning, but at the same time, your thoughts weren't reality. you just sighed, making yourself comfortable on the couch.

“miss choi talked about her son again.”

“of course she did,” chan laughed, running a hand through his hair. “she doesn't ask anyone but you.”

“i’ve never seen the guy, so i’d rather not.”

“chan, don't forget,” vernon said, showing his phone to the younger one. chan’s eyes widened before he got up to rush to his room. you looked at vernon, your eyebrows raised at the sudden outburst. vernon noticed your confusion, “he has a date.”

why did that sentence make you feel weird? you knew it shouldn't because of the dates you've been on, but something about it worked your nerves. “oh~ that's good he’s getting back out there.”

“you're jealous,” vernon deadpanned. you gawked, shaking your head.

“no, i am not!”

“you are and it's okay.”

“hansol, i am not jealous.”

it was vernon’s turn to gawk at you. the use of his first name caught him off guard, “fine, you aren't jealous, but… are you leaving or staying?”

“why? you want me to leave?” you asked, kicking your feet up on the couch, leaning on the armrest to face him.

“no, i’m asking because seungkwan is coming over and you know how you two get.”

“what!? what do you mean?”

“loud.”

“fuck you vern.”

he shrugged as chan rushed from his room with a bottle of cologne. he sprayed himself multiple times, tossing the bottle on the couch as he took his keys from the counter, “don't wait up!” he yelled before running out the door. as you watched him leave, you continued to look at the door, that was until seungkwan barged in.

“who’s ready to party?” he asked, grinning.

you weren't sure how you ended up in vernon’s bed, but once you realized it, you were too tired to move from the spot. your head was aching and you looked at both seungkwan and vernon who were on the floor and at the foot of the bed asleep. you let out a groggy sound, turning over to look at your phone, groaning once you saw the time. it was around 9 am and you needed to eat before you took something for the major headache you had.

as you moved out of the bed, you walked out rubbing your head, one eye closed shut, and for some reason your mind in a haze. you decided to walk over to chan’s room to see if he was awake. you wanted to ask him if he wanted any breakfast already knowing seungkwan and vernon would need it once they woke up, but you came to stop when all you saw was him laid up, asleep with a girl by his side. you felt sick. you didn't know if it was the hangover or that jealousy thing vernon was talking about, but you made a b-line to the bathroom. you shut the door, rushing to your knees beside the toilet.

you didn't realize you were crying until you stood up to look at yourself in the mirror after puking out any and everything from the previous night. your lip gloss was long gone from your lips, your hair slightly messed up from whatever style you put it in prior, and now your eyes were trickling unnecessary tears. all you could do was faintly laugh at your appearance.

“stop crying, fucking wimp,” you told yourself, wiping your eyes away from the tears, but it didn't seem like it was working. you looked in the small cabinet, finding the facial wash vernon has been talking you into using on the first shelf. you took it, applying a bit to your hands before scrubbing your face clean of whatever makeup was left. once you dried your face off, you looked at yourself once more, deciding to make an excuse for the red eyes as you walked out. “cooking, that’ll do me well.”

you went to the kitchen, opened the fridge, pulling out whatever they had that you could at least try to cook. as you were fixing the food, you heard footsteps behind you and the sound of vernon’s voice. “what's that smell?” “it's the smell of food vernon.”

“good morning, my sweet hungover friends. i made food,” you plated everything, turning around to find vernon and seungkwan as messed up as you. you smiled at them, sliding the plates over to them on the island. as you grabbed your plate and leaned up on the counter to start eating, you watched as chan came from his room to stand behind the two of them, shirtless and wearing glasses.

“you made breakfast?” he asked with a smile, walking to look at the food. you nodded in response, staring down at your plate. vernon looked at you for an extensive amount of time, looking at every part of your face, almost analyzing it.

“your eyes are red. you okay?” he asked, causing seungkwan to look up as well. seungkwan’s face contorted in worry, but you were quick to calm them. you looked at the two of them, shaking your head with a smile.

“i woke up pretty sick, maybe it's from that.” the both of them looked at each other before looking back at you, deciding to take your word on it. you heard another pair of footsteps and a soft girlish voice talking, causing seungkwan and vernon to shoot a look behind them. you kept your eyes on the now empty plate as you picked at little crumbs that were left there.

“oh? morning,” you heard seungkwan say to the mystery girl. once you looked up, you caught sight of a brunette petite girl, a short dress hanging sloppily from her body.

chan slightly tensed when his friend talked to the girl. he shifted from behind you, walking over to the door with his arm wrapped around the girl’s waist. there the feeling was again, you wanted to release your guts into the toilet yet again. you stood upright and saw chan come back to the kitchen. you walked over to the sink, washing your plate off before turning back around.

“i’ll see you guys later, i um... i gotta run errands. yeah.. that's what i have to do. bye,” you went over to the living room, grabbing your jacket and bag, you slipped your shoes on before rushing out of the apartment. all of the boys looked at each other in confusion at your sudden departure.

“who was that?” vernon asked chan, the fork plopping onto his plate.

“oh, um, someone,” chan said, beginning to eat. neither of the boys was buying it and chan knew, so he gave up. “it was just a one-night stand… just for fun, you know?”

seungkwan rolled his eyes at his friend, “idiot.”

date four.

maybe you shouldn't have been so harsh for the first few dates, because this one was atrocious. teenage boys surrounded you and other onlooking single men sat all around you. maybe they had girlfriends but you weren't sure by how they were screaming and yelling… over a video game they weren't even playing.

if you knew that your next date would have been at a competitive overwatch tournament, you wouldn't have shown up. you looked around, the only thing getting you through was the beer that sat beside you. you were all about showing your date what you're interested in, but this–

“come on! that’s so unfair,” your date, wonwoo, said, barely audible.

–this was too much. you could have even dealt with going to a pc cafe. you went with chan and vernon quite a bit when you were in a relationship, and they were pretty enjoyable, but something about watching others play games and having others scream over them instead of the actual players felt weird. again, you didn't mind it (yes you did), it was like a concert of some sort, but dammit, you wanted to leave.

you remembered when wonwoo had told you he was really excited to get to know you, but the man was shy. like extremely shy. you offered to go get burgers after this event, but he said nothing. he nodded. that's it. you sat there and chugged the beer, sitting the cup aside, enduring more screams from many of the men.

once it ended, you left with wonwoo on your side, “so... burgers?”

wonwoo looked at you, pushed his glasses up, and walked away. you stood there in pure shock.

“where the fuck are you– hey! you're my ride!” you exclaimed, trying to follow him, but he only sped up. you groaned, not wanting to follow him any further as you watched him turn a corner leaving your sight. so much for this date.

once you turned your head you found yourself in the proximity of an actual burger restaurant; you were shocked at how ironic it was and said a soft, “huh” in disbelief. once you walked in you spotted chan’s date from the night you stayed over, your eyes squeezing shut hoping she was just a hallucination. when you opened your eyes and she wasn't gone, you just hoped she didn't see you once you took your seat, but it just so happened she was your waitress. you were hoping she didn't recognize you since you had your head down for your very brief encounter, but your fears came to reality.

“welcome to– oh– hey, you're chan’s friend.”

you looked up at her, putting on your best fake smile, “ah, yeah i am.”

“we didn't get to meet properly, i’m jiwoo. nice to meet you.”

“nice to meet you as well… i’m y/n.”

“so~ what would you like to eat today?”

she was so pretty, you couldn't blame chan for moving on to her. you wouldn't say it was an upgrade, you weren’t sure about bringing yourself down in this sort of situation, but she was beautiful. you didn't get a chance to look at the menu because of your excessive staring. you shook yourself out of whatever trance she had you in to tell her that whatever she likes, you were sure to like as well. how caustic.

once she came back with your drink, she gave you a smile and walked off. you really couldn't dislike her, she just… seemed way too sweet. you never did like it when waiters sat down with you when you ate, but talking to her seemed really easy. it seemed like a date with her rather than the date you had just been on. she made you laugh, she even took your word when you said that you came here alone just to come you know, alone.

“so, tell me. chan seems like such a sweet guy. do you– do you think you could give me pointers. you've obviously known him longer than me,” she said, catching you off guard. again, the irony of the said man’s ex helping out a woman who was widely interested in him. you nodded your head, agreeing that you did know him, inside and out; you didn't say that, but you were surely thinking it.

“i mean, i think chan just likes someone who is solely them. he’s a really loving guy, affectionate, and truly adores who he’s with. as long as you treat him right, he’ll treat you right.”

she nodded along, looking down at the plate of food you had, “you're really sweet y/n… i hope you find someone who matches you. not like the guy who ran from you.” you looked at her in shock, watching her stand up. “i was serving on the patio, and i saw the guy walk away, even though i didn't get a clear view of you, i knew it was you when you came in right after the incident.”

you nodded, your eyes still widened as you pulled your card out to pay. she just shook her head, saying the meal was on her since you helped her out. you smiled, saying thank you before walking out.

you were really in some deep shit.

date five… and six?

now you realized why people didn't go out on dates with miss choi’s son. he wasn't ugly, frankly, he was hot as fuck, but the problem was… he didn't know how to plan a damn date (but honestly who did at this point). here you were sitting behind a guy you also knew since you matched with him on tinder as well, jihoon. why was he there? well, you were sat on a couch… in jihoon’s studio… listening to seungcheol rap.

seungcheol was honestly paying most of the date money for the session, and the lyrics to his song were very–how would you describe this–pathetic. you wondered why he brought you there but discovered his mother had told him all about you and how you didn't want to go on a date with him; his lyrics really broadcasted how he felt about you and the choices you had made regarding him. you would've been mad at his attempts to diss you, but the beat jihoon had produced was all too good.

jihoon sat in his wheeled desk chair with his jaw dropped at the way seungcheol was lashing out at the mic. it was embarrassing for him, especially since you were sitting right there, listening to every single word that was spewing out of his mouth like venom. you knew you weren't getting dinner out of this, so you quietly stood up, but not quiet enough.

jihoon turned to look at you, his eyebrows raising, “you're leaving?”

“oh, yeah. i mean… i don't think i’m actually gonna be able to talk to him after this, so yeah,” you answered, picking up your belongings. he was quick to talk you into staying, saying he would buy you food if you did stay. he told you that seungcheol is sometimes very temper influenced so he didn't want you to mind him.

once finished, seungcheol listened to the song, nodding to the beat. you listened along, your arms crossed over your chest, your teeth clenching once seungcheol looked at you with a satisfied smirk.

jihoon paused the track, looking over at his friend, “all this… and i mean all of this–” jihoon paused his sentence to express what he was saying with his hands motioning all over the place before refocusing on what he was saying, “because y/n didn't want to go on a little date with you?” seungcheol merely nodded, looking at the younger with his lips pressed together in a meek smile. he was a cocky little shit, it pissed you off.

jihoon sighed looking at you apologetically. you shrugged, looking over at the black-haired male, his body crouched as his hands crossed in front of him. he and jihoon continued to consult about the direction of the song until seungcheol had to go. you didn't let him leave without telling him to unmatch with you on tinder, a scowl falling on his face.

“i’m so sorry about him,” jihoon said, grabbing his phone as he turned his cap backward so he could rub his face.

“you shouldn't be the one to apologize. he should, but you and i both know he won't.” jihoon nodded, sighing softly. jihoon ordered you two late-night foods, engaging you in one of the best conversations you've had on a date. the guy was passionate about his career and you really loved an ambitious man, the only thing wrong was that neither of you felt anything more. you both talked until you needed to get home, and after thanking jihoon and giving him your number, you left with a smile on your face.

chan knew something about you, you were headstrong, stubborn he might say. so when you came to his door, pounding on it like a madwoman he knew exactly what it was for: another bad date that you refused to not go on. you stood there, soju in hand and chicken in the other. chan gladly let you in, not because of the food and drinks (although it was a plus), he didn't want to see you upset.

you looked over at chan, mouth stuffed with food, a small smile on your face. this was the first time you’d talked to chan after the whole four days of not talking to him. to you, that felt like an eternity. you felt as if you were being a bit petty to him by leaving him hanging for something so small, but the shock was evident the day of.

“so, how’s it been with jiwoo,” you asked almost absentmindedly, looking back down as your toothpick dug into another piece of the boneless piece of chicken. you didn't notice the frown that fell over chan’s face once you brought up the girl’s name, but he quickly changed it once you looked back up at him.

“oh, yeah, i don't know. i don't think it's gonna work out between us, she’s cool, not for me though.”

you looked at him with wide eyes, your brow shortly after, furrowing in confusion. you remembered the talk you had with jiwoo about chan and believed the advice you gave her was a prompt way to understand chan a bit more, but unbeknownst to you, chan had already turned down any idea of them dating… the first date. “what? what happened to ‘getting back out there’?”

“well, i am, but for her, i only said i was going on a date, that's it,” chan crossed his legs, wiping his face off. “plus, what an odd topic of conversation after not talking to me for almost five days.”

“it was four, asshole.”

“four, five, same difference. anyways, who's next on the to date list?”

“some guy named, junhui. he really seems cool.”

“you said that about the last thirty dates didn't you?” he teased, finishing off the last bit of chicken you both had. you scowled at him, throwing your toothpick his way. he dodged it, tossing a dirty napkin at you, making you throw up your fist in retaliation. “whoa whoa killer, calm down now.” you slowly dropped your fist, the scowl not leaving your face. “good girl,” chan said, not noticing how those two words made your tipsy mind go for a nice turmoil.

you’d always had that little praise kink, and since you had a few shots of the peach-flavored soju, you couldn't help but clear your throat to hide the growing arousal in your pants.

“anyways, you gonna tell me about the date you went on yesterday or what?”

“fuck miss choi’s son, that backstabbing old lady. remind me to only speak to her husband from now on,” you shifted in your seat, rolling your eyes.

“uh-oh, what happened?” he asked, leaning over to grab the shot of soju he’d left for himself.

“that sick, good-looking dude took me on a studio date. the only problem was, the whole song was about me! the song was good and that's why i hate him even more! he’s so damn pathetic. i would never, and i mean never, date someone whose tinder bio is ‘music artist’ again. i just, i mean, what the fuck, you know? and you know what else, that loser is so cocky i couldn't even understand it. it really did stress me out chan, like…”

chan sat and listened to every word you said. he took a mental note to ignore miss choi as well, just for the time being. chan got annoyed by the sounds of the guy, but once he saw you perk up about the second half, his demeanor faltered, smiling at your giddiness. he did feel that pang of jealousy come back over him, yet decided to ignore it(especially after you told him you felt nothing more for the guy) opting to continue smiling at the soft laughs you let out. the conversation continued until your phone buzzed, a signal for you to leave. once you left, chan was left alone, the jealousy becoming a bigger pain than he thought.

every date was getting more and more intolerable for him. he would never admit it to you. chan was never a confrontational guy. back in your relationship, yes there were arguments, but were they from his own insecurities? nope. he kept most of his jealousy down and didn't want it to come in between the two of you. unlike you, chan was a closed book, only opened on some marked, annotated pages. he remembered the day back in high school when he had asked you to date him, it wasn't even his idea to ask you out as quickly as he did.

all of the seniors had their noses in books, and for some reason, chan’s nose was buried on wiki-how. he searched and searched for how to ask out a girl in five simple steps, but didn't follow a single step. seungkwan had pushed the younger to ask you out, wishing he’d do it quickly because he couldn't take the longing stares your way and the constant napkins they'd bring for him because of his drool puddles. once he did ask you out, you were more than ready to be in a relationship with him.

that was another thing you thought you got wrong in the relationship, not going slow. rushing into something as big as being in a relationship with your long-term high school crush was something you could never get again. it did way more harm than it did good, no matter how you two looked at it. now you two were stuck in this non-communicating friendship. you both deserved better, even if that better wasn't coming from each other.

date seven (not really).

there was something therapeutic about these types of days: cooped up in your apartment… your ex-boyfriend sitting beside you as you wallow in sorrow from yet another failed date. usually, women sat with friends, cups of wine, tubs of unearthed freezer-burned ice cream with a spoon deep in it as they clawed at the remains of the sweet treat, but here you were, your only actual friend being your ex as you complained to him yet again.

“i just don't get it, you know?” it wasn't that you were sad, it was more so you were actually looking forward to this date (nothing new), this junhui guy seemed like so much fun; that was until he pulled up to an advanced martial arts center. you watched from outside, looking at the many many people getting slammed to the ground, and decided on a firm no. you told him a nice ‘thank you’ before leaving and unmatching the profile from your tinder. you didn't hear him out, you couldn't. the way he already looked like he would use one of those moves on you even if you were in the car frightened you. he was a peculiar man.

chan nodded, his feet kicking up on the top of your coffee table as he snuck another drink of your beer. he shrugged, looking towards you as he stretched his arms forward, keeping the beer in hand. “where do you even find these men at? like it's making me feel bad now.” he tilted the nose of the beer bottle towards you.

“you didn't feel bad before?” you stole your beverage out of his hand, head tilting in confusion. as you swigged the beer you missed the way he chuckled softly at your bafflement. as you set the bottle down, you almost gagged at the taste. “how could you drink that? it's flat.”

chan grinned and got up from his seat, swinging his legs off the table, his socks sild over the hardwood towards the kitchen to grab another beer: one for you and one for him. as he came back, you took one from him, hitting the top on the side of your coffee table to get the cap off.

“to answer your question, it's not like i didn't feel bad, it's more like i already knew. you're never gonna find better than me,” he joked, hopping on the couch.

“shut up chan. i’m being serious,” you drew your fist back, a laugh coming from his mouth, getting comfortable once more beside you.

“my bad. i’m just kidding!”

“so, what about you? have you figured out your situationship with jiwoo?”

chan shook his head, leaning his head back on the armrest to look up at the ceiling, “don't ask me about that.”

“what? why?” you shoved his legs off the couch and turned your body towards him with a small frown.

he tipped his head to look at you, sighing, “what's your infatuation with her? you wanna date her now or what?”

“i mean she is a sweet girl, i just want someone good for you…”

“well, i’m glad you're so concerned but stop asking me ab–” chan stopped his sentence midway, pulling out his buzzing phone, his eyes widened before he jolted up. “sorry, i gotta go. i forgot i had something to do for the rest of the night. i’ll see you later, okay? call me if you need me.”

“where are you going?” you asked as he slipped his jacket up over his shoulders.

“to bang bitches and get high.”

“lee chan!”

he walked to the door with a large grin, “i’m joking, maybe... okay bye!” before you could ask anything further, chan ran out, nearly breaking your door from how hard he slammed it. you jumped at the sound of the door, looking towards the front as chan came back in to say a quick ‘sorry’ before closing it again softer this time. once chan left the threshold of your apartment, you let out a groan.

“‘i just want someone good for you’? what the fuck?” you slammed your head gently on the closed door, bending down to a squat. “are you a fool?”

you groaned to yourself, not wanting to ponder any longer on the situation, but it did keep you up for a bit.

date eight.

you could've sworn you were done with this whole online dating thing. you've been on seven unsuccessful dates and had fallen into the idea that dating just wasn't your thing, but dammit you were desperate for some sort of affection–

“fuck, you feel so good.”

–maybe not as desperate as this.

the date had gone okay. he took you to a nice petting zoo sort of thing, you rode trains together, fed animals, and he was such a pleasant guy to be around. by the end of the afternoon date, he took you to a pretty little restaurant that wasn’t too packed. you got to know a lot about him and he knew how to hold a basic conversation, but goodness did he talk a lot. it wasn't bad, but it wasn't the best when it was a two-person date. you gave him the basics, name and age because that was all you could get out.

by the end of the night, he asked you to go back with him to his place which you thought he was a good enough guy to go with. now you regret it. he hyped himself up in the car, telling you how good his dick was and how he could make you dumb with just his good skills; that itself was a red flag. here you were, laid up in this man’s bed with everything on except your pants and panties.

at this point, you were fucking him by how loud his groans were and how quiet you were. you laid on your back, looking up at the ceiling, rolling your eyes at his attempts at dirty talk. you didn't want to crush the poor soul's heart, but he was doing a terrible job at living up to expectations. his eyes were shut, sweat dripping from his forehead as you let out the best fake moans you could.

wanting to get this over with, you clenched around him causing him to shudder in pleasure. he halted his movements, coming in the condom as he rubbed your pussy lips, possibly thinking it was your clit, but your sweet clit was hiding from the man. you winced at the feeling, continuing your manufactured moan performance.

“i’m gonna come,” you tried to make it as believable as you could, the sarcasm not getting to the man's head as he smirked cockily.

“come for me.”

you’d never had to fake an orgasm before yet somehow you were a natural at it under pressure. once he pulled out, he lay on the bed, knocked out instantly. yep, you definitely fucked him. you muttered under your breath, kicking your legs off the side of the bed as you looked around the room. you found a desk that had tons of supplies on it, standing to your feet as you walked over to it. you slipped on your panties and jeans, grabbing a slip of paper and a pen. you looked at the man who was fast asleep, writing something along the lines of ‘good date, bad sense of reality soonyoungie…’. you left the slip of paper with a small smiley face hoping there were no hard feelings as you slipped out.

you were left unsatisfied. you were thinking of running to chan’s and saying ‘fuck the breakup, i need you to rearrange my insides the best you can…’ but you pussed out. if the two of you were going to move on peacefully, hookups with one another shouldn't even be in discussion in your brain.

you made it back to your apartment safely, throwing down your bag in frustration, and took off the clothes you had just been in. you laid in bed, panties and bra clung to you as you tried to think of the most pornographic scenes, but none of it seemed to work. your mind kept drifting to your ex, no matter how much you tried to redirect your thinking. you groaned, pulling out your phone as you pulled up undeleted videos you had kept of the said man; why did you have them? you couldn't even answer that for yourself. most videos chan used to send you consisted of dirty talk… pure filth.

the video you pulled up was a black screen, soft sounds coming from it, presumably from him stroking his own cock. he let out a hushed chuckle, “why’d you have to leave so damn soon, hm? you went to your hometown… and now i’m stuck here, fucking my hand to the thought of you. i hate you, you know that?”

you don't even think you were paying attention to any of the words he was actually saying, your fingers grasping the hem of your panties, dragging them down to your ankles. you kicked them on the floor somewhere as you rubbed the tips of your soft fingers on your slit. for the past year, you had to satisfy yourself. for the past year, you had to settle for fingers that weren't anyone else’s. for the past year, no matter how much you were trying to move on, the lust you had for chan took over.

you were so lost in the sound of chan’s moans and your whimpers that you didn't realize how close you were from rubbing your clit. it was impressive how chan could make you come quickly even if he wasn't there with you.

once you came down from your high, you stared at your dark ceiling, with no sound but the cars outside and your soft pants. what were you doing and what the hell was wrong with you?

date nine.

you shouldn't have blown off jun that time. you shouldn't have. this was way worse than being body slammed into a cushioned floor. you never thought you were that out of shape, but dammit, this joshua guy really did bring you to the light. you normally loved hiking… when you could keep up. the man took the longest strides and never waited for you to catch up.

to be frank, you don't even think he looked at you much; it was weirdly familiar, deja vu-ish really. thankfully, you both made it to the halfway point. you plopped on a bench, chugging the rest of your water, looking over at your date. there he stood, back muscles protruding out of his black t-shirt as he pressed the pad of the vending machine. you probably missed your mouth with the water a couple of times, too focused on his back that you've gotten used to since that's basically all you've seen since being on the date.

when he turned around from getting his drink, his focus wasn't on you. man, this guy was a keeper; staring at every girl that passed by his view, smirking at anyone who made eye contact with him, what a good guy.

as he made eye contact with you, you could see a small frown return on his face. you crossed your arms, your personality refusing for you to brush it off. you stood from the bench walking over to the jerk of a man, standing in front of his built figure.

“what's up with you? you must be a great guy to get to know, hm?” you fumed, his attention now on you, but not the way you intended when you had come on this date.

“don't think i don't know about you,” he said, sipping his sports drink, a bit of it dripping from his mouth as he walked away from you. you tried for it not to distract you as the anger disappears for a bit once you comprehend what he just said to you.

“huh? what are you talking about?” you walked over to him, you caught a glimpse of his phone as he tugged it out of his pocket. you were close enough to him to see two familiar faces. “holy shit…”

joshua didn't know you had seen his wallpaper, but the words from before struck a nerve now that you knew what he was talking about.

“you absolute piece of shit. just like your garbage friends,” you indicated. joshua looked at you, his eyes narrowed as if examining you. he chuckled, leaning up on the railing that overlooked the view. he took another sip from the bottle, completely ridiculing you. “men.”

you started your way back down the trail, joshua yelling to you that he was your ride and you had no way home other than through him. he continued to yell at you, trying his hardest to keep you on that revenge date. you didn't bother turning around to face him as you flipped him off over your shoulder. you now realized why you felt deja vu, you knew why all of that felt way too familiar.

he was friends with both yoon jeonghan and choi seungcheol.

oh, how it made perfect sense.

once you got home, you texted chan(of course) asking him to come over, yet again to take your mind off of things. chan looked at your message, texting you saying he’d be right over as he stood from his seat. vernon and seungkwan looked at their younger friend, both of them looking at each other and then back to him.

“and where do you think you're going, young man?” seungkwan asked, grabbing another handful of chips. chan put a finger over his lips, walked to his room, and grabbed his jacket that lay in the middle of his bed. when he made his way back into the living room, seungkwan spoke again.

“i thought you said you were done with jiwoo. i hope you're not going to play with that poor girl's heart anymore.”

“i was never playing with it from the get-go. i told her that what we had was a one-time thing, so don't make me out to be a bad guy,” chan said, texting you again to let you know he was on his way.

“so… where are you going then, big boy?” vernon asked, slapping seungkwan’s hand away from the folded chip. seungkwan looked at him, disgusted as he grabbed a different chip.

“to y/n’s,” your name barely left his lips, yet the two on the couch let out obnoxious groans. “oh?”

“i told you he was a masochist,” vernon mumbled to seungkwan. seungkwan hit vernon’s shoulder, looking over at chan. seungkwan tried his hardest to put on a fake smile, failing awfully at it.

“chan… why do you… you know… why do you keep doing this to yourself?” seungkwan asked, his hands crossing in his lap.

“what are you talking about?” chan asked. it was apparent what seungkwan was getting at. it was obvious as daylight, the only ones seeing darkness being you and chan; though chan saw a bit more light than you did.

“you know exactly what he's talking about. stop denying you're still in love wi– ow!” seungkwan pinched vernon’s arm before he could finish speaking. chan’s eyebrow rose before piecing together the situation. he let out a laugh, crossing his arms over his chest. the two on the couch looked at the younger with confusion. “what's so funny?”

“nothing,” chan was still smiling, “look, it's just me going over to comfort a friend. it's nothing bigger than that.”

“yeah, but look chan, we just… we don't want you getting hurt. we like y/n too but you know what the breakup did to you, and vernon’s told me how you've been seeing her so often,” seungkwan spoke slowly, almost as if he was taking care of a balloon that could burst at any point. seungkwan stood up from where he was sitting, walking over to chan. chan’s smile left his face slowly.

“i don't know what you're getting at. look, she decided that we should move on and just stay friends. she doesn't want to talk about the breakup, she just wants a simple move on, you know?”

“okay, great, but is that what you want?” vernon asked, leaning further into the couch, the chip bowl now in his possession since seungkwan got up.

chan did take note of how many times he said “she” instead of “we”. it didn't make his point any more convincing than he wanted to make it. seungkwan wrapped his arm around the younger one. chan chuckled a dismal chuckle at himself, if he were his own friend, he’d also think he was pitiful. it took a while–almost a month and a half–for him to come to his senses.

“chan?” seungkwan questioned gently.

chan rubbed his face, his friends' words dawning fully on him, “i’m a fucking idiot… aren't i?” he turned to seungkwan.

seungkwan saw the sadness in the younger’s eyes as he shook his head and brought chan to the couch to sit, “not an idiot, just a man in love with someone who can't seem to comprehend that or his feelings correctly.”

“so basically an idi– stop hitting me!”

you sat there. when ten minutes passed, you thought nothing of it. when thirty minutes passed, you grew worried. when three hours passed, your mind instantly went to the worst. chan was a ten-minute walk away from your place and one thing about lee chan was that he was punctual. you brought your phone up to your face, texting him again. it took a while but you saw he had read it. the three bubbles popped up, your hope still hanging by a thread. you gleamed, as the bubbles kept going, and going, and going… until they disappeared and you were left with “read”.

you stared at it. you stared at it for a really long time. you brushed your teeth and stared. you ate leftovers and stared at it. you sat in your bed and stared at it. in your dreams you could've sworn you saw it.

he left you on read. what did you do? is he doing this to make you go crazy? he said he was on his way. did he get kidnapped? nah, chan talks a lot, they'd let him go the minute they got him. maybe an old lady gave him an apple, now he's poisoned! ah, y/n you're an idiot. you were so lost in your thoughts, that the only thing that got you out of them was the smell of burnt toast from the toaster. you groaned to yourself, juggling the piece of toast between both hands until it fell in the trash.

you walked back to your room, looking to find the cat still on your window sill. you can only imagine he was there from last night. you sat with your legs crossed in front of your window, sighing softly, “what do you think tabby cat? what could me being left on read mean?” the cat responded with nothing, as expected. you slapped your head, shaking it in disbelief. “i’ve gone mad? over being left on read… hah…”

date ten.

“so how was it?” seokmin asked you, giving you the other half of his burger. you smiled at him, sitting your pasta in between the two of you as you nod at him.

“it was really good! i’ve always been a sucker for things like plays,” you admit, twirling your fork in the noodles. seokmin grinned, taking a bite of the burger. he covered his mouth before responding to you.

“i was a theater kid back in my high school days. well, i still am.”

“oh really? is theater your major?” you asked, slurping up the last noodle from your fork. he shook his head, wiping his mouth.

“i already work in musical theater. i started right when i got out of high school. wanna hear something?”

“you mean–”

“me singing right now? yes.”

he gave you no time to respond as he burst out into song. your eyes widened as he stood from his seat, acting out movements as well. you were embarrassed, but he was a phenomenal singer. the whole restaurant had their eyes on him. his voice boomed to where even some non-patrons stood from outside the door to look in. you couldn't believe that your date had turned into dinner and a show but why were you surprised at this point.

seokmin, however, had been the best date you'd been on in the past month(not saying much). he was sweet, he knew how to let you speak, and you were even sharing the food you both got. this little outburst in a random musical song really couldn’t ruin how you looked at him, despite being very embarrassed. as he finished the song, the whole restaurant clapped, the people outside clapped, and you clapped; he was amazing, but you really needed to know his mbti.

he sat back down in front of you, the same beaming smile on his face.

“what was that?” you asked him. you ate your half of the burger, looking at him in astonishment.

“oh, that? just a musical i’m leading in. you should come to see it when it comes out!” he exclaimed. he picked at the pasta, eating some of it as he waited for you to respond in anticipation.

“sounds fun, what's the musical called?”

“xcalibur. i’m playing king arthur.”

“that's awesome, although i don't know the roles. a king sounds great, also seokmin, i have a quick question.”

“yeah, what's up?”

“what's your mbti?”

“infp? he's an introvert? there’s no way…” you shook your head, sat down your things, and walked into your room. with a soft grunt, you laid back on your bed. you pulled your phone out, looking back over the text message you'd sent to chan last week. it still says read y/n, it hasn't changed.

you sighed to yourself, sitting the phone on your stomach. you wanted to call him, you wanted to ask him what was wrong, but you couldn't bring yourself to do it. the last time you had called it went straight to voicemail. the last time you facetimed him, you were stuck staring at your own reflection on the phone. you'd never been more confused than you were now.

you were both happy, so you thought. you both found that being friends was easy, so you thought. you thought you were both over that feelings stage, again, so you thought.

you thought you were both good at pushing down feelings… but you definitely weren't. you missed him. you needed him now. chan was always someone you looked for when a date didn't result in what you predestined it to be.

now, you were alone.

you had no one to talk to about what happened at the restaurant, you had no one to rant about not being able to date properly, and you were lonely. his friends were your friends. his friends only became your friends when you two started dating. now you both were back to how it was when the breakup happened. you couldn't text or call vernon or seungkwan, you felt it wasn't your rightful place.

you looked over to your window sill, the cat nowhere to be seen. you scoffed at the irony. you were completely alone, wanting your bed to swallow you whole and take you away from your racing thoughts.

weeks and weeks passed by, with no dates, no tinder, no matches. you deleted the app. you haven't contacted anyone, you have barely left your house, only going to capture pictures to keep your mind busy.

ever since you've cooped yourself in your apartment, you had time for yourself, time to think, time to come to an understanding with your feelings. it's so unruly how much time you took to come to terms that you were indeed head over heels for lee chan. the times you'd comfort yourself by looking at pictures the two of you had taken, the comfort you'd gotten from listening to his voice messages, he felt like home and you couldn't lose that.

you were stubborn, you knew what you wanted even though it took you forever to realize what that specific thing was.

so as it rained over seoul, you didn't bother taking an umbrella; you wore your hoodie, running in the converse you wore. your clothes were getting soaked but you could care less, especially after he had opened the door. “hi.”

you shivered slightly at the soft breeze that came from his apartment. chan tugged you in, rushing over to his bathroom to give you a towel as he tossed it to you for you to wrap around yourself tightly. not long later, the two of you sat there in his living room in silence. neither of you spared a glance at the other. the tension was unbearable, but how was chan supposed to bring up why he stopped talking to–

“so, why did you… why did you stop talking to me?” well, that was easier than he thought.

“i… i don't kno–”

“don't pull that shit with me, chan. tell me the reason… if it's something i did, i’ll apologize and we can go back to how things were before this.”

“no we can’t,” he concluded, his fingers playing with his sweatpants lace. you looked at him, evident gloom on your face.

“w-why not? i mean, i thought things were going good, and then out of nowhere, you ghosted me,” so much for admitting to your feelings for him.

“this isn't good for either of us, y/n. and you fucking know that too, don't you?” he looked over at you, shaking his head in disappointment. “why do i even keep playing into your little bullshit plans? every. single. time.” you watched as he stood up, his arms crossing over his chest.

“chan, what are you talking about? what bullshit plan–”

“this whole fucking thing y/n. you, me, we can never be friends,” he raged. he let out a huff, rubbing his face as he spoke softer. “you know it.”

“why are you saying this?”

“some things… some things you can't just apologize for and expect shit to go back to your definition of ‘normal’. it's like you don't care about anyone’s feelings except your own!” he was back to yelling and the sudden outburst made you jump a bit.

you looked at chan and something truly shifted in your mind. your sock-clad foot tapped on the wooden floors in soft pats until your leg began to bounce gently. the words melded into your brain and everything he said strengthened your anger.

you stood up from your seat, walking over to the man, eyes boring into his, “so… since i don't give a fuck about you as you say, i’m gonna do something that you hate. confront me chan, what are your feelings, huh?”

“i don't have to deal with this y/n, not with you. you can't force me to say shit–” you shoved him, dropping the towel that was around you. vernon wasn't there like how he was for your usual arguments. chan’s eyes pierced through yours, his fist clenching at his sides.

“fucking say it!” you shoved his shoulder again, your voice growing louder as you snapped at him. you don't know where this kept anger came from, but better you get it out now than keep it in.

“stop shoving me y/n or i swear to you–”

“what? you’ll do what, huh? stop being a fucking pussy and tell me how you actually feel.”

“what do you want from me? what do you expect me to say? none of it will get through that hard head of yours, will it?” one last shove from you sent chan off the edge, “fine! you wanna know what's so wrong with me? imagine having the love of your life make decisions for you all the damn time. watching her spend all her time on dumbass dates and spending all that time trying to move on from someone who still can't take her off his mind no matter how hard he tries. and just imagine this, he’s doing it all for her.”

as he spoke, you backed away from him as he got closer and closer and closer until you fell onto the couch. chan was seething in anger, his nostrils flared as he continued, “it’s always about, you, you, you, the only times you focus on me is when you want to see if i’ve moved on myself. don't you dare call me a pussy when you're the one who stormed out once she saw i had someone over.” “fuck you chan, i didn't storm out because of her.” chan knelt in front of you, the anger pouring from your eyes as tears filled them, “yes you did. stop lying, it's not cute on you.” the hot tears spilled from your eyes, your body beginning to shake, “what? you give but you can't take?”

you stood up, shoving past him, and began to walk out but your body was pushed back down on the couch. chan’s arm pinned you to sit as he continued to kneel in front of you, “fucking let me go,” you sobbed. chan hated watching you cry(when it wasn't in the bedroom), but he knew if you didn't talk now, you never would.

“no… i’m not letting you walk out. i made that mistake a year ago and look where it got us… right now, we go by my rules, not yours. you made me talk, so now it's your turn.”

chan was patient. he sat there in front of you for almost ten minutes as you cried. his own eyes filled with tears, a few falling down his cheeks. your body calmed when chan’s hand found yours. he rubbed the top of your hand with his thumb. you opened your eyes, the instant eye contact making your heart wrench.

“talk.”

“i… i thought we made a mutual agreement to move on from each other… i thought that's what you wanted, every decision i make isn't me wanting to be selfish. i swear it isn't,” you hiccuped, your hand shaking in his as you talked. you couldn't hold his gaze any longer. you looked down at your intertwined hands, the sight bringing you to more tears. you shook your head as you kept speaking, “i never wanted to hurt you back then chan. i was doing this moving-on thing because i didn't want to harm you anymore.”

“y/n…”

“no, you said i could talk, so let me. i beat myself up when we broke up and i know you did the same. i didn't want that for you, i didn't want to hurt you chan, i didn't,” you pitifully repeated yourself over and over quietly until you continued speaking. “but somehow… me being cautious of that hurt you even more.”

chan couldn't hold himself together any longer, his head dropped and the salty tears poured from his eyes.

“i love you lee chan, i love you more than anything. you're the best thing that's ever happened to me, i’m so fucking sorry i didn't treat you like you were. the dates, i stopped going on them a month ago. you were the only thing on my mind, you not texting back really did have me worried sick…”

chan chuckled a bit, saying a soft apology, wiping his tears away as he looked at you. he didn't want any more blame on either of you, he didn't want to have any more regrets when it came to you. chan didn't want to miss this chance. it was his turn to be selfish. chan took both of your hands in his, “i never agreed on moving on, but i can agree about putting myself down after i left you. i hated walking out instead of talking about what we needed to change and fix. i never want you to take full blame anymore, you hear me? now, how about this, let's have a redo. i’ll take you on a date like one of those tinder dates did, i’ll try to win your heart back.”

“you don't have to win it, you already have it… but a do-over sounds nice,” you lifted your head to look at him, wanting to kiss him, but you didn't rush it.

chan pulled his hands away from you, holding only one out, “hi, i’m lee chan.” he smiled with all he had.

“hi chan, i’m y/n l/n.” you returned the smile.

date eleven.

maybe you were biased or deeply and madly in love but this was the best date you'd been on. chan beforehand texted you “it’s a match!” not knowing how much trauma that phrase gave you. you cringed, begging him to tell you where you two were going, but he didn't budge.

it wasn't big, it wasn't grand, and it wasn’t a studio date(fuck seungcheol). chan knew you’d love it. your eyes grew at the neon signs and fluorescent lights that shaded your faces in blues and greens.

a bowling arcade.

you remembered your first date with chan being in the same arcade. he brought you not knowing how competitive you were. turns out you didn't really have to be too competitive, chan was really bad at bowling. you kept your giggles and laughs to a minimum for the sake of him not having a mental breakdown. after a night of bowling, chan really did show you up that night in arcade games–not all of them–and made you eat the words you teased him with.

that night was perfect, but nothing compared to this night.

“you know, i’m kind of crazy when it comes to bowling now. you wouldn't believe it,” he bragged, wiping a ball down as he looked at you.

you nodded along with his assessment, pointing at the pins, “hey, you're right. i don't believe it. try knocking those down, big boy.”

he squinted at you, turned back to the lane, and lined up his shot… roll, and roll, and in the gutter it went. you covered your mouth, trying to stop the laugh that was going to escape but it was no use. you heard him groan, pointing behind him as he pouted.

“i know, i know, go on and get that spare ‘crazy bowler’,” you quipped, watching him grab his ball. he lined up his shot once again, the ball curving to only hit two pins.

“this isn't right, i demand a recount.”

“chan… you can’t… never mind.”

when it was your turn, you looked towards the lane, the smile you once had was replaced with a concentrated frown. you lined up the pitch, watching the ball roll. before it made it to the pins you turned to chan, pointed at him, and said, “you should get better at this.” the sound of the pins falling was heard behind you, and chan’s jaw dropped in astonishment. he stuttered trying to figure the situation out and when you turned around, you were stunned as well.

the ball had only hit nine pins, the last pin being in the middle, the most unusual pin to still be up.

“how the…” you mumbled as you looked at the still-standing pin.

“that's more impressive than knocking them all down.”

“that's what i’m saying,” you said, your arms crossed as chan stood beside you, taking a picture of it.

“how did you manage to get worse at something you were actually good at?” you laughed, as you both made your way to his apartment door. chan whined, struggling with the keypad a bit before walking in with a few stuffed animals you both had gotten from the prize store. none of the stuffies coming from any of chan’s won tickets.

“hey, it's not like i was that bad, it was more that i lacked skill, and the buttons were way too far apart,” he tried to convince. once you two made it to the living room, vernon and seungkwan were already staring at the two of you.

you leaned over a bit from beside him and mumbled, “you said we’d be alone.”

“we were supposed to be.”

vernon was the first to put together the situation, scooting up on the couch, rubbing his eyes to make sure he was seeing things correctly, “wait a minute. wait a damn minute. did you two?”

“did they, what? go on a date? yes. did he not tell you?” seungkwan asked, looking over at vernon.

“no!”

“he’s been bugging the shit out of me, ‘what should i bring her?’, ‘how should i dress?’, ‘what type of food should i take her to get?’. how am i supposed to know? she's your ex,” seungkwan complained, the two of them talking like the both of you weren't there.

“i’m just flabbergasted as to why i wasn't told about this.”

“flabbergasted? vernon, did you just say flabbergasted? isn't that too big of a word for you?” you joshed. chan burst out into laughter beside you as seungkwan sucked in his lips to keep from laughing just as loud.

chan quickly wiped the smile from his face to look at the older male, sending an accusatory finger his way, “hyung, i thought i told you that we were coming back here?”

“you did, but i wanted to see if it would fail or not,” seungkwan confessed, shrugging as he stood up. you furrowed your brows, crossing your arms over your chest as you stared at him. seungkwan quickly caught sight of your glare, his eyes widening as he shook his hands in front of him, realizing what he’d just said. “no. see, not like that. i’m not saying it would have failed like immediately. i’m just saying because… and… you… vernon let's go.”

vernon nodded, rapidly standing to his feet, “roger.”

both of you watched as the two of them ran from the apartment as promptly as they could, leaving you and chan alone. chan grinned at the running two as he went to his room, tossing the stuffed animals on his bed. he narrowed his eyes at the plushies before changing his mind, picking them back up and sitting them on an empty seat, facing the wall. he walked back over to his bed, pointing at it, “you’ll be used soon, don't worry.” he chuckled lightly at his little joke before walking back to the living room.

you were already sitting on the couch, patting the seat next to you as chan plopped down. “did you think the date would fail?” you asked him curiously, what seungkwan had said sending your mind into a frenzy.

“no. did you?”

you looked at him, his eyes locking onto yours while you shook your head. you said a soft ‘no’ keeping eye contact, occasionally looking down at his lips. the last time you looked at his lips, he smirked a bit, snapping his fingers up towards his eyes.

“my eyes are up here.” “yeah… and my eyes are down here,” you pointed at his lips, gingerly poking his bottom lip with the tip of your finger. chan grabbed your wrist, his hand gradually traveling up to interlock with yours.

“can you tell me something?”

“what's up?”

“how many of them did you kiss?” he questioned, playing with your fingers gently. his eyes never left yours. yours, however, faltered quite a bit.

“dates?” chan nodded. “one.”

“fucked?”

you almost choked on some spit that was about to go down your throat once the word left his mouth. you composed yourself as best as you could, gulping down the aforementioned spit, “one.”

“i see…” chan was angry. you could tell. he wasn't mad at you, but at whoever laid a finger on you in the first place. both pairs of lips you had he’d always expressed belonged to him. though he couldn't be too mad since he did sleep with someone himself. “how was it?”

“terrible…”

chan chuckled humorlessly, “mm… let me guess, he knocked out before you could even get to come.” you knew what this was leading up to as you tried to suppress your excitement.

“basically,” you murmured, your lips sucked in as you tried keeping your smile brushed off your face. he nodded again, looking down at your hand that was perfectly linked with his, exactly how it should be.

his eyes went back to look at yours as he began to lean in. the hold by his hand grew tighter once your lips met. it was soft, delicate, and felt exactly how it did when you two were high schoolers kissing like nothing else mattered. you could feel his hands untangle from yours as he placed a hand on your face, deepening the kiss.

the kiss soon grew breathless, rough, feverish. it was hot, the only thing cooling you being the ceiling fan that was spinning above you two. you both pulled away from each other, his lips slightly reddened as his tongue brushed over his bottom one. you watched as he licked it slowly, your heartbeat in your ears at this point. “fuck you,” you stood up, grabbing his hand again before dragging him up from the couch to his room.

once the door closed, he pushed you against it, his lips attaching back to yours. his hands came up to your clothed breasts, gripping them both harshly causing you to pull away to watch his hands fondle you. you looked down at his hands as they gripped the hem of your shirt, pulling it over your head. he tossed it behind him, his eyes focusing on your bra-covered breast.

his lips connected to your neck, sucking at the skin. his teeth softly bit at the spot that he had just sucked on. he tore away from the marked skin, a proud smirk on his face. he trailed his fingertips along your hips to your back, unclasping your bra as you let it fall from your arms. he grabbed your hand, leading you to the bed. he pushed you down, a soft giggle leaving our lips. he smiled a bit, climbing on top of you, his lips kissing yours again. he mumbled softly, “i fucking missed you so much.”

you pulled back, looking him in the eyes, “then show me. show me how much you missed me.”

the look he gave you would’ve probably scared other girls away, the look he gave you was nothing less than devious. you knew how giving chan the ‘okay’ to wreck you made him act. he grabbed a hold of your legs, dragging you towards him. he unbuttoned your pants, taking both them and your panties off of you in one go.

“you still have that little masochist side of you?”

“i went on ten bad dates and you're asking me that now?”

he laughed a bit, getting rid of his own shirt as he stood at the foot of the bed. his eyes raked each and every part of your body, his gaze landing on your dripping core. his hands gripped your knees, spreading them and raising them up so they touched your chest. he swiped two fingers along your slit as you choked on a whine once his palm connected to your folds with a sharp slap. he sat beside you, keeping an arm draped on the backs of your thighs to keep your knees to your chest. “i missed this even more,” he said, his middle finger dipping into your tight hole. he twisted and thrust the finger slightly, making your eyes fall shut, letting out a pitiful whimper.

“look at me.” your eyes didn't open, too focused on how his single finger made you feel more than anyone(soonyoung) could. “y/n.” chan stopped his finger, bringing his hand up to grip your jaw. he turned your head to look at him, your eyes finally opening half-lidded.

“such a pretty girl,” he dropped his hand back to your waiting pussy, two fingers penetrating you. your breath hitched as his fingers gradually picked up their pace, your arousal slightly spattering against his palm. he pulled them out quickly, looking at you with a devious smirk on his face, noticing your upset expression, as he pushed his fingers back into you… only for him to pull out each time he pushed them in.

he may have missed you, but there was something about teasing you. he loved watching you whine, knowing it was for him and only him. you on the other hand hated it(secretly loved it). you wanted nothing more than to get him back for all the teasing, but chan would never allow it. domming him was never ever a question in chan’s mind. you'd tried once, but he never backed down on being on top. chan continued to tease you, watching and sneering at your writhing body.

you were begging, begging for him to do something, begging for him to fuck you. he wiped his hand on your thigh and stood up once again. you looked up at him, putting your feet down on the mattress, keeping your legs spread open for him as he stripped free from his pants and boxers. he tutted his finger from side to side then pointed that single finger to you, rotating it as he signaled for you to turn.

you grinned, speedily turning on to all fours, bringing a pillow to your head as you arched your ass up towards him. he leaned over you, moving the pillow away, allowing your body to bend more into the arch as your head lay flat on the mattress. he stood back upright, kneading your ass in both of his hands, scarcely leaving small spanks. you, being the stubborn brat you were, shook your hips impatiently, knowing how mad it made chan. those small spanks became harsh as you let out a small squeak.

“chan… please…”

“keep begging, maybe it'll work in your favor,” his tip glided through your folds, stopping at your clit as he rubbed it gently.

“please chan, need your cock so bad. missed it in me, missed your cum filling me up,” you whined, and for some reason, feeling yourself tear up already. you couldn't see behind you, but from the sound of chan’s chuckle and the tip of his cock pushing into you ever so slowly, he was enjoying every bit of it.

“more.”

“please chan, need you to fuck me.”

“that's it? doesn't seem like you really missed me as much as you said,” he taunted, pulling out of you. at the mere feel of him pulling away, you jolted up with wide eyes, shaking your head.

“no! please, i need you so bad, i’m begging. you don't understand how bad i need you chan,” you sat on your knees, bottom lip poking out in a pout and tears brimming your eyes. “i’ll even tell you how much i touched myself just thinking about you.”

“well, tell me,” he crossed his arms over his chest, smirking at you tauntingly.

“i… every time i fingered myself i… i pictured it was you just so i could come faster.”

“carry on…” he bit his lip, his hand wrapped around his shaft as he stroked himself.

“it was never enough, all i wanted was you to fuck me…it didn't feel the same. i don't know, i just… i just need you to be rough with me, please,” you said in nearly a whisper.

that seemed to do the trick because soon as you finished your sentence, chan pushed you back on the mattress, dragging you to the edge of the bed, his cock pushing into your pussy harshly; the squelching sound of your juices was the only thing heard in the room other than your sudden gasp.

chan didn't take his time with you. at all. his hands gripped your waist, almost destined to never let go. his hips pounded into yours, the feeling making your hands grip the sheet below you. “this is what my pretty girl wanted, right?” he asked in between grunts.

the tears that brimmed your eyes pooled down your face as you tried to give him a response but failed miserably. you could only muster up moans, but that was enough for chan. he fucked in you almost like he was proving a point to you. this was where you belonged, not with anyone else.

“tell me how much you love it,” he leaned on you, his hips slowing a bit.

“i love it so much, need more please,” you begged pitifully, feeling his teeth slightly bite your earlobe.

“more, huh? this isn't enough for you?” he nodded to himself, standing back upright, grabbing your shoulders to bring you with him. he wrapped his arms around your waist tightly as he slammed you down on his cock. his hips moved in tandem with his pulls causing your eyes to roll back in pleasure.

“is this good enough, mm? is this what you wanted? you're taking me so well, you know that?”

“fu-fuck chan. feels so, ah, feels so fucking good,” you moaned out, leaning your head back on his shoulder.

one of his hands moved from the grip he had on you to hold onto your chin, tilting your face to his. he kissed you roughly, his tongue gliding along with yours. you were in a total haze. when you said that chan could make you come within a blink of an eye, you weren't lying… but as you felt your orgasm build, so did chan. your walls sucked him in deeper and as you were about to let out another moan, he pulled out with a thought popping up in his mind.

you turned your head to look at him, panting, tears still flowing down the plush of your cheeks, “please, don't… don’t fucking do this again.”

he chuckled, scooting you to the side as he sat down on the edge of the bed. he grabbed your hand, tugging you gently on his lap, your cunt hovering over his cock, tip prodding at your entrance. “wanna ride, or do you want me to do all the work?”

your eyes widened, your hands bracing on his shoulders, “you're letting me top?”

“don't be so surprised. do you want to or not? i’d be more than happy to–”

“when i need you to take over, will you?” you cut him off, playing with your fingers.

“a thousand percent,” he said, smiling softly. his demeanor did a full 360 on you, but sex with chan was always filled with surprises.

you smiled widely at him, pecking his lips before one of your hands dipped between the two of you, lining him up to your entrance. you sunk down on him until you bottomed out, both of you letting out content groans. you felt amazing around him, but you knew chan was waiting for you to come before he could. you started to bounce on his lap, clumsily, but enough for you both to get some bits of pleasure. chan let out an unexpected low moan that made you almost lose your mind and your nonexistent pace. you wanted–no, needed–for more of those to come from his mouth. you gripped his shoulders tighter, eyes squeezing shut as his cock grazed your walls entirely too well. he was holding onto your waist as tightly as he did when he was domming you, but this time it was for a vastly different reason.

you loved this, so much. you leaned back, hands on his knees as you swiveled your hips against his, clit brushing up against his pelvis. the extra stimulation had you throwing your head back in pleasure, letting out an unstable moan, unable to focus on your movements any longer.

“you did your best pretty girl,” he joked, leaning back on his hands, his left grabbing your thigh. “move your hips back against me, you hear me?”

you nodded, one of your fists clenching at your side while the other gripped his knee to keep yourself balanced as you languidly ground your hips against his length. he pumped up into you, focusing on how beautiful you looked: eyes closed, bottom lip tucked underneath the top row of your teeth as you tried to hide your breathy moans, your face stained with tear streaks, breasts moving up and down steadily as you rocked your cunt down on him. you really were his pretty girl.

he watched as his lap puddled in your sweet arousal and swiped your clit with two fingers before bringing them up to his mouth to suck on them. you looked at him with the same hooded eyes as before. the way he sucked on his fingers making you clench down on his shaft.

“you keep doing that, i’m gonna come faster than you get to,” he laughed airly, rubbing your thigh gently.

you smiled lazily, leaning up, bringing your lips to his. the air in the room, although still hot, became lighter. it was loving. chan had proven his point, now it was time to enjoy the moment with you for as long as he wanted. his hand moved from your thigh to your ass, slapping it before gripping the soft flesh. you sucked in a breath, pulling from his lips, looking over his expression. you bought your hands to cup his face, your swollen lips kissing his once again.

“i love you y/n,” he mumbled against your lips. “so much.”

“i love you too.”

“i’m gonna go faster now, okay?”

you said a soft ‘okay’, laying your forehead on his shoulder. chan’s pace quickened nearly instantly, the position you two were in gave chan a way to get to your g-spot easily. you moaned in his ear, eyes fluttering shut yet again.

“fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck,” you cried, turning your face away from him as his fingers toyed with your clit. you kept moaning ‘oh fuck’ like it was the only two words in your vocabulary. moans and curses spewed from your mouth until your body convulsed on top of him.

chan held you to him, kissing your shoulder, slowing his thrusts to coax you through your high. as you came down, you breathed heavily, trying your hardest to steady yourself.

chan rubbed your back soothingly, “you okay?”

you nodded.

“i’m gonna come now okay,” he said, flipping you so your back laid onto the mattress, letting you climb to the head of the bed to rest your head on a pillow.

you nodded again.

he kneeled on the bed, pushing his cock back into you as he jerked his hips sloppily inside of you. you tried to moan, but the overstimulation was so overwhelming that your mouth fell open into a silent moan. you felt him twitch in you before ropes of his cum filled you to the brim. you shook a bit as he pulled out slowly, the sweat from his body melding with yours as he laid on top of you.

“so, did that show how much i missed you?”

“oh… fucking absolutely.”

after the last date, chan continued taking you on them. the butterflies each time never left no matter how many dates he took you on. there was no doubting how much you loved each other, and after each amazing lovemaking session, and the quite daring quickies, you got back together. this time you two didn't rush into it, you didn't want to lose the love you both thought you had lost before.

it was finally after the last date, you two were cuddled up against the couch looking at whatever movie played on the tv as vernon and seungkwan came in looking at the two of you.

“oh wow. you owe me twenty bucks,” vernon whispered to seungkwan a bit too loudly. seungkwan slapped the other’s shoulder, his face morphing into a frown.

“you guys were betting on our relationship?” chan asked, a scowl falling on his face, as well as a mimicking one on your own face.

they both looked at you two with widened eyes before pointing at each other, “he started it!”

“vernon, you literally told me you wanted to see if it'll last. guys see, look it wasn't even me, i… hah… i thought you two were gonna prosper,” seungkwan tried sounding certain of himself, scratching the back of his neck before clapping his hands together. neither you nor chan’s faces changed from the previous scowls. vernon, obviously not catching the signals, spoke again.

“what? dude, you're the one who said ‘oh y/n might kick chan’s ass by the end of–’ ow!” vernon rubbed the side of his head. you glared at seungkwan as he bit down on his cheek, avoiding eye contact. vernon on the other hand was ready to slap seungkwan back, but seungkwan was quick to move away.

as the two argued and chased each other around the tight living room, chan looked at you and then at your hands that were laced together. perfect.

“you wanna go to my place instead?” you asked him, rubbing his hand softly.

he looked up at you, nodding as he looked at his two friends and then you again, “yes please.”

in a split second, you two were gone and vernon definitely got that twenty bucks.

short taglist: @bang-bang-bangtxn

can’t tag: @chwebychew

#dino oneshot #dino smut #seventeen smut #seventeen oneshot #seventeen scenarios #lee chan smut #lee chan #lee chan oneshot #kpop smut #kpop #kpop oneshots #race neutral reader #ambw smut #kpop ambw #seventeen ambw

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sweetestofchaos · 2 years

Text

Monsta X’s Reaction to...

Yᴏᴜ sʟᴇᴇᴘɪɴɢ ᴏɴ ᴛʜᴇ ᴄᴏᴜᴄʜ ᴀғᴛᴇʀ ᴀ ғɪɢʜᴛ

Shownu

Hyunwoo knew that the two of you would have to talk tonight before bed. He never liked going to bed angry and after the argument from earlier, he was still feeling some type of way. He showered and got himself ready for bed, poking his head out into the living room to see that you were still up, watching tv. He shrugged his shoulders and went back into the bedroom to laydown. He would talk to you after whatever you were watching was over. He didn’t remember falling asleep and when he woke up, he was so confused since you were cuddled into his side.

Hyunwoo got out of bed, dragging the blanket behind him and went into the living room, only to find you passed out on the couch. When you came to grab your pillow, he has no idea...but he didn’t like it. Yawning, Hyunwoo settles himself on the floor in front of you and stares at your face. He can see the dried tears from the glow of the tv and he frowns. Reaching for the remote, Hyunwoo turns the tv off and he presses and kiss to your temple. Slumping over your chest, Hyunwoo gets as comfortable as he can and drifts off to sleep.

“I miss you babygirl...I’m sorry.”

Kihyun

Kihyun sat outside of your bedroom with his heart in his hands. The sounds of your cries pierced his ears as you cried alone in the bedroom. He had tried to get to you, but you locked the door. So, he sat down and waited for you. He hated that the two of you fought, it was stupid and if he could take back the words, he would in a heartbeat. You sobs quieted down and Kihyun could hear you moving around, he jumped to his feet and licked his lips when the lock clicked. You opened the bedroom door and all the hope that Kihyun had to make it up to you died when he saw the pillow and blankets in your arms.

He shook his head and refused to let you pass him. He dropped to his knees and wrapped his arms around your thighs, burying his face into your legs. He held you tightly and his tears burned your skin. His shoulder shook as he cried and he tried to speak, he tried so damn hard to apologize, but his words were broken. You started to cry again as you lowered yourself to your knees in front of him and Kihyun hugged you tightly. When his lips touched yours, the kiss was salty and fully of silent promises to do better.

“I love you; you hear me. I fucking love you. I’m sorry, my heart.”

Minhyuk

Minhyuk knew he needed to apologize but he wasn’t sure how. You refused to talk to him, and you wanted nothing to do with him. He was surprised when you turned down going out to your favorite noodle shop with him. ‘Damn, she’s really mad at me.’ Minhyuk thought to himself, so he did the only thing he could think of. He ordered from the shop on his phone while you were in shower and got himself all settled into his pjs. The food arrived pretty fast, so he quickly set everything up on the coffee table before he set up a movie on the tv. He would be damned if you went to bed angry with him.

The moment you walked into the living room with a pillow and blanket in your arms, Minhyuk’s heart stopped beating. He couldn’t believe what he was seeing and it hurt...a lot. He watched as you silently took in the sight of food in front of you and he could see a smile pulling at your lips. He smiled softly and patted the spot on the floor beside.

“You can’t be angry with all this yummy food. Come and sit before I eat it all in front of you.”

I.M

The moment Changkyun saw you storm off to the bedroom, he knew what you were about to do. He rubbed the back of his neck and sighed when you walked into the living room with a pillow and a blanket. He frowned and shook his head. He called you dramatic and easily dodged the pillow that you threw at him with a small chuckle. He stopped you from making up the couch and sat down, pulling you into his lap. Changkyun slipped his hands under your shirt and traced small circles onto your stomach, staying silent as he eased your anger. He rested his forehead on the back of your shoulder and started to hum softly.

Changkyun knew that you hated to sleep alone and he kept his comments to himself. He knew better than to call your bluff, it would only end with you even more pissed at him. He offered to watch a movie, that one that you kept talking about all week and that seemed to make you forgot all about the fight. As the two of you settled onto the couch, Changkyun kissed your temple and held you close.

“Do you wanna cuddle in bed after this? We’ll have more room.”

Hyungwon

The anger that Hyungwon felt, he knew that tonight was going to be one for the books. It was rare that the two of you got into major arguments that ended in the silent treatment that lasted so long. You had actively avoided him for the rest of the night and when bedtime came around, he watched as you gathered your things and left the bedroom. He sighed and stared at the empty space beside him. He knew that you needed space, but he couldn’t let you go to bed mad at him, yet alone sleep on the couch. Getting out of bed, Hyungwon walked out to the living room, and he wrapped his arms around your waist, pulling you into a back hug.

The sheet in your hands dropped and Hyungwon tightened his hold on you. He apologized softly and trailed a path of light kisses along the length of your neck. He pushed you away from the couch lightly and sat down with a sigh. He understood needing space and he would give that to you...even if it hurt to know that he couldn’t sleep with you in his arms. Hyungwon cleared his throat and pushed his glasses up the bridge of his nose before he patted your butt to send you on the way to the bedroom.

“You take the bed, baby. I’ll see you in the morning...I love you.”

Joohoney

Jooheon’s angry words echoed in his head and he winced. He hated when the two of you fought, it left a bitter taste in his mouth and his heart always felt it weighed a ton. Jooheon had spent a few hours out of the house, he went to Hyunwoo to ask the older man for advice. When he came back home, Jooheon had his whole speech planed out. He wanted to apologize and hold you in his arms while you played with his hair to put him to sleep. He really didn’t want to go to bed angry.

The tv was on in the living room and he sighed, did you stay up this late to talk to him? Jooheon sighed and stepped into the living room, ready to give you his speech but once he saw you sleeping on the couch all his words were forgotten. His eyes widened and his jaw fell open, no...no, no, no! Oh, God...d-did you want to leave him? Trying to fight back his tears, Jooheon walked over and pulled you into his arms. You woke up to him crying and begging you not to leave him while he apologized over and over again. The two of you laid on the couch as you wiped away his tears and kissed his damp skin.

“I’m sorry, shit baby. I am so sorry. Please, don’t leave me.”

𝔹𝕠𝕟𝕦𝕤

Wonho

He felt bad the moment you stormed off, done with this augment. He really didn’t mean to make you cry...he was stressed and even worse he was hungry. After the fight, Wonho left the apartment and decided that he would surprise you with your favorite late night snack, plus the fresh air would help him relax a little. When he walked into the apartment with bags in his hands, he was shocked to see the couch made up like a bed. Wonho felt his jaw tick and he bite the inside of his cheek. If you thought he would let you go to sleep mad or sleep on that couch, you had another thing coming.

Wonho quickly got to work setting the food on the table while he sat on the couch. He got some ice cream on his finger and as he was licking it off you walked into the living room. He mad eye contact and proceeded to wraps his lips around his thumb making sure to watch your every move. He pats the spot beside him and slowly pulls his thumb from his mouth while he smirks at you.

“Good thing you put a sheet down.”

#soc monsta x #monsta x reactions #wonho #i.m #changkyun #monsta x kihyun #monsta x shownu #monsta x minhyuk #monstax joohoney #monsta x hyungwon #monsta x x black!reader #kpop ambw #monsta x ambw #exqueuese me

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calibabii21 · 7 months

Text

|| in my mind || p.js, l.hc

pairing: idol!Jisung x fem manager!reader ft. idol!Haechan

genre: smut

warning(s): phone sex, Jisung is audacious, dom-ish Jisung, Haechan is a little shit as per usual, excessive use of "noona", use of "pretty", voyeur (?) Haechan, Haechan switch mode asf, Haechan is referred to as "baby boy"

wc: 1.4k

a/n: this literally came from me listening to Poison and a conversation about it transitioning to phone sex with Jisung, so, here's a little something short. mdni.

Excitement coursed through you as you finally slipped into your bed. Everything was going as planned. Until it wasn't. You had counted the minutes to be in this position: lingerie, laptop, vibrator- only to be interrupted by an impeccably timed phone call.

You take a few deep breaths to calm your nerves before answering. "Hi Noona!" Your irritation begins to dwindle as you hear the enthusiasm in his tone, "Yes, Jisung?" The conversation proceeds as a usual check in, and then, silence.

Taking advantage of it, you close your eyes sinking back down into your previous position and try to will yourself back into the mood. "I miss you." Instinctively, a moan leaves you at the sound of his mutter, a jolt rushing through your body as your eyes snap back open. "I- you'll see me tomorrow."

If he heard your slip-up, he doesn't make it known to you, but unfortunately for you, there was another pair of ears present- the worst pair. "Oh my. What's got you making such a pretty noise for our Sungie?" You're glad you don't have to think of a bullshit excuse because it sounds like Jisung is pushing him out of the room and locking the door.

"Sorry Noona, he just walked in." Still slightly flustered you laugh it off, "Oh no, it's alright haha.." Your heart is pounding, as if it can tell something is about to kick off. "Do you..need something..Noona?" Every hair on your body stood up. He always calls you that, but he said it differently that time. Like there was a hidden meaning behind it.

Clearing your throat seems to be the one you can do at the moment. "Something like?" You know this is very wrong. He's not only your client, but he's still impressionable in your eyes. At least he was. "Do you need, help?" Deciding to continue feigning ignorance, you're about to respond but he beats you to it, a sudden sturdiness in his voice you've never heard before.

"Please, don't play dumb. Do you need me to help you cum?"

Stunned can't even describe your current state. You want to answer him but God is this unprofessional. "Do you need my voice, to guide you through it?" oh God. He chuckles at your- well, what would be silence, if not for your audible shallow breaths. "Bet you don't even need my guidance. Your desperate hand is probably already caressing where you wish my hands were."

There's a whine that leaves your mouth at his words, but also at the realization that he was right. Your hand was already touching yourself, whispers escaping you, "Jisung." As if beckoned by the call of a siren, his husky response is instant, "Yes, Noona?" You don't know what you want from him, but you feel he's the only one who can satiate you, "Help me?"

You're startled by sudden boisterous laughter booming from the other side of the line, but it isn't Jisung. "I tried to stay quiet and enjoy the show but damn, Jisung. You're good." You can't bring yourself to be surprised, "Hyuck?" The arrogance in his tone is clear as day, "Hey, Pretty. I bet your hand hasn't even moved from between your legs, has it?"

Heat spreads across your face, "Sh-Shut up." But rather than intimidating, it comes out pant-like. "Want to know where my hand is?" You let out a breathy chuckle, reaching for your vibrator, "I can take a good guess, perv." He returns the chuckle and groans, his hand stroking his shaft more prominent to your ears now, "Don't act like you don't miss it."

The youngest's silence becomes louder so you call out to him, "Jisung?" His voice is somehow deeper and heavier than usual, "Yes, Noona?" You mewl and meekly address him as you tease your clit with the smooth side of your toy, "Are-are you touching yourself?" Haechan can be heard pointing out how pretty you sound in the background.

"Do you want me to touch myself, Noona?" For some reason you grow emotional and feel tears well in your eyes as you breath shakily and continue teasing yourself, "Yes, please, I really do." You hear clothes rustling on his side of the line when Haechan chimes in, "Oh you sound so pretty- she's our pretty little girl isn't she Sungie?"

"D-Don't call me that," his voice is already shaky and raspy, "but, yes, she is."

That triggers something in you and you activate the vibration on your dildo, "Sungie." Wet fapping sounds from both men have you moaning and whining. "Noona." The three of your moans harmonize so beautifully, Haechan unsurprisingly being the most melodic. "Pretty girl, let me see your pretty face."

You aren't sure what it is with him, but he just triggers your sadistic side. "No, baby boy. B-But Jisung c-can." You unintentionally moan a little more when you say Jisung's name. Haechan soon hears the ringing of Facetime on your laptops and lets out a loud whine. "That's not fair I-I asked first." The hiccup in his words already lets you know where he is, and you aren't far behind him.

"Fuck Noona, your pussy looks so pretty. So pretty and greedy I bet you're clenching at the thought of taking the two of us." Hyuck, still on the other line joins you, simultaneously whining and whimpering at Jisung's words. You really were clenching around the silicone, just wishing it were one, or both, of the men in your ear.

"Bet you want one more person filling your mouth too, don't you, Noona?" You moan uncontrollably despite biting your lip and clench your thighs together as you continue fucking yourself. "Mark Hyung?" You moan and nod, picturing Mark fucking into your mouth, "Or maybe Jaemin Hyung?"

Okay, never had you thought that deeply about Jaemin like that. You'd imagined things occasionally, yes, but the way Jisung said it? You were soon gushing all over your fresh sheets, "fffuck Jisung." "That's it, good girl, Noona. Keep going, ride it out, Noona." Your eyes roll back as your body jerks, moans flowing nonstop.

At his command, you can't bring yourself to stop; yet in spite of the overstimulation your thoughts are coherent enough to coax Haechan through. "H-Hyuck, you okay baby boy?" The whine he rewards your ears with is so desperate you let one of your own slip. "You need a little help? Want to see the mess I'm making for you?"

You know it's mainly Jisung that got you there, but you can't deny the times Haechan has given you some of your best O's. He doesn't hesitate to beg, "Yes, please, yes yes." You can already feel your second orgasm approaching.

"Mmm, baby boy, you look and sound so pretty and fucked out for me, d-don't you?" Your eyes gloss over as the phone call ends and his picture comes into view on your laptop. "I could say the same about you, Noona." You grow flustered as Jisung bursts your bubble of teasing Haechan.

"F-Fuck yo-," your insult is interrupted by the abundance of pleasure that tips you over the edge. It was quite unfair actually. And it seemed to be in slow motion for you; the almost artistic way white ropes simultaneously painted their skin.

Deep down you know the prettiest canvas to you will always be the honey-like golden. Though the milky white has a, well, ethereal milky essence to it. Both made your night end in such bliss that you almost wish it wasn't over.

You hesitate to turn off your vibrator, still wanting more, "Don't overdo it, Noona." The command itself not direct, but you in fact, understood completely and remove it after powering it off.

"Tomorrow, your ass is mine," "Ours" Jisung quips at Haechan, to which he sighs then scoffs at, "Fine, ours. Though I don't plan on giving you up that easily." His eyes alternate between you and Jisung as best as they can, "Just because you made him your new boy toy doesn't mean I won't ruin you for him. Or any other man for that matter."

He leaves the call after, declaring war I guess you could say? You're a little confused by it but you can't deny the excitement building in the pit of your stomach as you see a prideful jealousy stir in Jisung's eyes.

"Well then."

"Goodnight, Noona."

"Goodnight, Jisung." You blow him a kiss, waving goodnight and end the call, but not before hearing his last declaration.

"Just know I'm dreaming 'bout you."

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andysorbit · 8 months

Text

Chess, Not Checkers (M)

non idol Chan x fem!reader

genre: smut

warnings: breeding kink, daddy kink, unprotected sex, dirty talk, mild spanking, fingering, oral sex (female receiving)

word count : 1k

"Mr. Bang... does this skirt make my butt look big?" You ask softly. You want his attention but he's scrolling on his phone.

"Hmm... yeah it kinda does I think... come here. I need a better look," he says as he sits up and swings his legs over the side of the bed. He sets his phone down beside him and gives you his undivided attention.

You walk over to him, "I don't think I like how I look in this," You say with a pout, "I'm gonna change."

"Well, hey... now wait a minute. You asked for my opinion so let me have a look and then we can talk about it... turn around for me," he says with a playful lilt of his voice.

You spin around and hope that he notices your thong as your skirt catches some air and raises a bit.

"Uh uh. Slower," he hums. You spin slower and he grips your hips once you've turned to face away from him.

"Yeah... I love this skirt," he mumbles more to himself.

"So my butt does look bigger in it?" You ask.

"Well... not bigger... I think it just sort of accentuates your ass in a really nice way... I'm inclined to lift this slutty little skirt up and have a look at what you've got hiding under here... can daddy take a peak?" Chan's voice is soft and so playful.

"Yes... please," You whisper.

"Okay then let's have a look," he hums as he raises the back of your skirt up to expose your bare cheeks, "Oh... aren't you as pretty as ever."

He gives your ass cheeks a slap before soothing the heated skin with soft rubs and squeezes, "Are you sure you wanna go out tonight? You can't tell your friends you've caught a cold or something?" he asks as his lips pepper kisses over your left cheek and then your right.

"Noooooo... Christopher, don't do this to me again," You plead weakly.

He chuckles and scoffs at you playfully, "Don't you call me Christopher. You only call me that when you're mad at me."

"I am mad at you... you won't just let me go... you're making this hard," You mutter.

Chan doesn't stop licking and biting at the skin on your ass, "And you're making me hard... come lean over the bed."

He stands up and you take his place; leaning over the bed, you lower your torso and rest on your forearms as you raise your ass up to meet him. He yanks your thong down to your thighs and gives your ass a slap.

"That's right, princess... face down, ass up," he praises you before tossing your phone onto the bed beside you, "Call your friends- right now and tell them you're probably gonna be late."

"Chris... please. I don't wanna be late. Come on," You beg.

Chan's fingers stroke against your folds, "You could still make it on time if you do as I say... I'll even drive you there so I know you'll be safe and on time but you're going to get on that phone and call that nosy friend of yours and you're gonna tell her that you're probably gonna be late... your only other option is to tell her that you won't be coming at all so what's it gonna be?"

"I have to tell her right now?" You ask as you feel yourself falling tame to his dominance.

"That's what I said... right now and while you do that... I'm gonna play with this needy little pussy," he purrs as his fingers dip into you and slowly pump in and out.

You reluctantly call your friend.

"Put it on speaker," Chan orders you.

You pray she doesn't answer but of course she does.

"Please don't tell me you're not coming!" she pleads.

"Oh, she's coming," Chan chuckles quietly.

"No, girl! I am! I promise I just... my makeup isn't... it's not coming out right. I uh... I dunno it's... just... fuck!" You say as carefully as you can. Chan's fingers press against your spot and you almost cry out.

"Don't stress yourself. Minimalism is always in, sis. Or just ditch the makeup. You already know you're gorgeous either way," she says.

"Ah... thank you," You mumble.

When you feel Chan's tongue replace his finger, you gasp, "Christopher Bang, would you stop it?" You plead desperately.

"What the hell is going on?" your friend asks quickly; the concern in her voice would be amusing if you weren't trying not to whimper into the phone.

Chan's tongue eases in and out of you and he positions you with your legs spread wider before sucking on your clit.

"No... he just fucking... he's touching my makeup again- Chris... please... please," You mumble.

"Well, girl, get it together and tell him to stop playing around. We're here so get a move on," she laughs.

"Yeah... of course... I'll be there soon. Bye," You breathe before hanging up.

You scream into the mattress.

"'Christopher Bang would you stop it?'" he mocks you teasingly, "That doesn't sound like 'please, daddy' to me... Not even close if I'm being totally honest... Fuck... I love eating this pussy from the back." He presses a kiss to your pulsing cunt

"Daddy, please... please! Fuck! Oh, fuck! Fuck!" You scream into the mattress and Chan slaps your ass. "Do you think I could ruin this hot little cunt before you go? How much can I break you before you leave?" he asks as he raises your ass up a little more. He doesn't pace himself at all and he slams into you.

"Daddy- fuck- it... fucking hurts," You choke out as you arch your back and push back to meet his hips.

"Yeah it fucking hurts but here you are pushing back on it and rutting yourself against me like a bitch in heat. You love it when I treat you like a little ragdoll... I'm gonna put a fucking baby in you. Gonna breed that dirty little pussy," he growls as his hips slam against you.

"I don't- wanna... fucking... g-go," You whimper.

"Oh no, sweetheart. You're going. You're gonna take this dick and then you're gonna take every drop of my cum and you're gonna keep it deep in that pussy... I'm gonna be with you- inside you- all fucking night," Chan says as he pulls you up to lean against the firmness of his chest.

"Please, daddy!" You cry out, "I- I can stay home! Please! Let me- let me... daddy, let me stay home... please... I wanna stay home with- with you, daddy!" You beg.

Chan shoves your face back into the mattress, "No... no. I'm gonna wear this little cunt out and every time you sit down, you're gonna think about me... you're gonna think about my cock and how good I'm making you feel and when you get home, I'm gonna wreck you all over again. Do you understand me?"

He knows you're not in any shape to answer him and he lands another slap to your ass just because he can and continues slamming into you.

Each thrust pulls a desperate cry from you, "Daddy," You muffle against the mattress as he pounds into you even harder.

"Yeah just keep that pretty ass in the air... daddy's so fucking close... fuck," he pants.

Your bodies are damp and his hips stutter before he finally releases inside you.

"There you go, love," he sighs as he pulls out and eases your thong back up.

"Daddy... I... I didn't cum... please," You whimper as you turn around to look at him from you spot on the bed.

Chan pulls you to your feet and pats your cheek softly,

"I know... that's why I said I was gonna wreck you again later... you thought you could tease me before you left and I'd be foaming at the mouth just dying for you to get back but no... I'm playing chess, not checkers, little girl. Now hurry up and finish getting ready so you're not late."

#neoculturecollectives #k-labels #kvanity #skz #stray kids #skz hard thoughts #skz smut #skz hard hours #stray kids smut #stray kids hard hours #stray kids hard thoughts #stray kids ambw #stray kids x plus sized reader #stray kids x black!reader #kpop ambw #bang chan hard hours #bang chan smut #bang chan x black!reader #chris bang smut

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thesafecafe · 1 year

Text

Back To Sleep: Feb Filth Fest day 2

CW + Disclaimer: 18+, MDNI, Somnophilia (consensual), oral (fem receiving), late night sex, unprotected sex, (do it safe y’all),fem! reader, chubby reader with thick thighs, praise, body worship, sexual language, use of the word cunt, pet names (baby girl, baby, pretty girl), smut under the cut, enjoy! Disclaimer: I do not believe the members of Ateez would act like this irl, nor is this meant to be a representation of the members or their personalities. It is a fictional depiction for entertainment purposes.

Words: 862

It was dark in your apartment. A comfortable silence encased your cozy little corner of the world. The soft pitter patter of rain was the only noticeable sound in the house, save the almost undetectable snores of you and your boyfriend, who had gotten stuck at your place during the storm. You both had agreed he should stay the night, and go to work in the morning from your place, since it was closer to your apartment anyway.

Seonghwa seemed to be currently having a hard time getting sleep though. He couldn’t tell what was troubling him, but he could feel that something wasn’t right. Shifting to lay on his side, Seonghwa sensed movement, his mind immediately going to you. Maybe that was it. You were moving around, and he probably picked up on your restlessness. That was it. He sleepily pulled you closer to him, murmuring in his half sleep state. “Baby, stop moving, I wanna sleep.” Mistake number one. The feeling that something wasn’t right had struck again, only this time, it was closer. “What in the-” Seonghwa opened his eyes, blinking a few times before scanning his surroundings. He quickly found out the source of the problem.

It was you. Unable to keep still in your sleep, your thigh was rubbing against him unconsciously, causing a tent to form in his pants. “Fuck that’s gonna be a problem.” Seonghwa hissed as your thigh brushed up against him again. He tensed when he heard you say his name in your sleep, gripping his shirt for dear life. “Seonghwa, please…“ So that was it. You were the one having a wet dream. Seonghwa was half flattered that you were dreaming about him, but half annoyed that the now had a boner, and he couldn’t exactly move away from you to take care of it in the bathroom without waking you. And if you kept moving your thigh, he was sure he’d lose his mind.

Carefully shifting so that he was hovering over you, Seonghwa took in what you had worn to sleep. Your favorite pair of sleep shorts, and a shirt that you’d taken from Seonghwa’s closet. He cursed under his breath when he saw the wet spot in the center of your shorts. Seeing you like this, in his clothes, dreaming of him, and calling his name in clear need made your boyfriend snap. Gently tugging your shorts down your legs, he cast them off to the side.

He took in the sight of you, his mouth watering as your arousal dripped down your plush thighs. Seonghwa couldn't resist leaning forward, and pulling you closer to his mouth. His tongue parted your lips, and he lapped at your hole before licking his way up to your clit. He sucked on it, swirling his tongue, twisting it just the way he knew you liked. He heard you get louder, your moans and cries of his name being like music to his ears. He kissed you clit once, before spreading your lips again, this time pushing his tongue into you. His thumb toyed with your pearl, while he fucked his tongue into you. He explored your walls with fervor, desperate for your release on his tongue.

"Hwa, please- too, too much" you stuttered. Ahh, so you were awake now? Seonghwa hummed against you, and rubbed you clit faster. Your orgasm hit you hard, your thighs closing in on his head as he helped you ride it out. You barely recovered before you felt something heavy against your leg. "Princess, I adore the way you taste. But I need more. Can I?" Blinking up at your boyfriend, you realized through your sleepy, post orgasm haze what he was asking. "Go ahead Hwa." That was all he needed. Spreading your legs wide, Seonghwa slowly pushed into you, groaning as he bottomed out. He pushed your legs up, placing them over his shoulders. He needed you to feel all of him, feel exactly what you did to him.

He started to move, his hold on your legs tight as he pounded into you. "You know, you'd think I'd get used to the way you sleep by now. Always moving your cute ass around, making me want you more than I already do. You drive me insane." Seonghwa started picking up speed, using the angle of his hips to fuck you deeper into the mattress. “Your body was made for me, fuck. You’re so fucking gorgeous baby girl.” He moved your legs off his shoulders, pausing only to hook them around his waist. He took your hands in his, resuming his previous pace.

“Your pretty little cunt takes me so well. Always sucking me in so readily, you’re so good for me. So easy. A pretty pussy for a pretty girl, my pretty girl.” Seonghwa felt you clench around him, a smirk playing on his face. “You like being my good, pretty girl, huh baby?” Seonghwa leaned down, kissing up the side of your neck. “Love it so much Hwa, please don’t stop, ‘m so close.” Seonghwa soothed you, softly kissing your lips. “Don’t worry baby, I’ll fuck this pretty little pussy right back to sleep.”

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Tags: @minhyuuk, @atinyszn, @hijeongguk, @k-drizzle, @hwalysm, @treasure-hwa, @mintmoose64

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sungboopdee · 10 months

Text

Shirtless (Smut)

Today was just a normal day for you and your boyfriend Sunghoon.

You were in your shared room on the bed reading a book when a shirtless Sunghoon walks into the room.

You peak from over your book but soon look away to not be so obvious that your staring.

Though sunghoon wouldn't care as long as your only looking at him he was happy.

Sunghoon walks up to the bed and lays down next to you giving you a peck on the cheek.

"Mhm, I missed you." Sunghoon says as he kisses your neck.

You feel shivers through your whole body. " You saw me like 20 minutes ago." you say kinda getting lost in the way he kisses you.

Hands traveling to your chest, gripping your right boob with his hand from under your shirt.

You moan softly.

"That's way too long to not see my baby," he confesses playing with your nipple and making you moan loudly.

The feeling he was giving you was unreal.

Your whole body felt so good from just that little squeeze of your nipple.

"Jeez Sunghoon, that feels so good." you moan out wanting more.

"Oh really? How good?" He says this as he starts kissing down your neck to your nipples taking one into his mouth.

You don't answer him cause you are too into the pleasure. He doesn't like that at all.

"I know you heard me talking to you, answer me." he says as he grabs your face.

" Mhm, so fucking good, I want you to fuck me sung hoon, Hard." you don't even realize what your saying till it's already out.

You look into his eyes and he smirks making you so wet for him it makes no sense.

"good girl"

He finally loses it and takes your shirt off revealing your breasts.

He looks at them with a hungry look in his eyes.

A look that you give the food on thanksgiving (lol idek what I'm talking about 😭)

He's quick to pull down your cute little shorts you were wearing just to tease him.

Your pussy is revealed.

"No panties, huh? Your so wet baby, I just know you were uncomfortable with those shorts on." he says running his fingers through your folds making you moan.

You nod at what he says giving him the bed room eyes cause your so horny at this point it's just crazy.

He sticks a finger in your pussy making you arch and moan loud. He smirks.

"Hmmm, yes oh my gosh that feels so good don't stop." You can't keep your moans to your self cause your so drunk from his fingers.

"you like that? Do you like my fingers all in your little pussy?" his words were sending you over the edge. You were so close.

You could see the bulge in his pants. It looked uncomfortable for him.

As you are about to cum he takes his fingers out of you, leaving you a whining mess.

He takes all his clothes off making both of you now naked.

His dick was extremely hard and large. Your mouth waters at the sight.

He looks at you before grabbing a condom out of the nightstand.

He slips it on then moves on top of you rubbing his cock all over your pussy.

You moaned so loud you were sure the people next door could hear.

"You want this dick in you, don't you? Don't worry baby you know you always get what you want." With those words, he puts his dick into you without any warning.

You yell and put your hands in his hair, gripping it lightly.

He groans making you wetter then you already were. His thrusts got sloppy and you were just losing it under him.

His hands travel to your bare ass. Grabing it.

You cant hold it in for much longer and he can feel you tightening around him. Your so close.

"Fuck, I'm gonna cum. Im gonna cum. Im fucking gonna cum." you say as you cum, shaking.

Sunghoon soon comes right after you.

The two of you try to catch your breath. Sunghoon still hasn't pulled out of you yet. But he soon does making you moan cause of the overstimulation.

He lays next to you. Out of breath.

"wow" that's all he says

Wow indeed.

_________________

This was my first time writing smut so sorry if it's bad lol. Requests are open 👐

#enhypen hard thoughts #enhypen smut #sunghoon smut #ambw #enhypen ff #kpop hard hours #kpop ambw #kpop poc #sunghoon #enhypen x black reader #enha #enhypen smut imagines #sunghoon hard hours

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xikerhunt · 11 months

Text

MISSING HIM

MINJAE x reader

Warnings: Nothing really just kissing and cuteness :)

Plot: Minjae has been at dance practice really late and you miss him a lot.

This is pretty short tbh, I tried 😭

You were just laying on your couch. The TV was playing and that was the only sound heard in the apartment.

Your mind began to wonder to the person that you always seem to be thinking about. Minjae.

What was he doing? Was he thinking of you? Those were the questions you asked yourself. You couldn't help it tho.

You haven't seen his face in like a week because of his busy schedule.

He just debuted in a group called XIKERS and of course you were happy for him.

He's been working so hard to get where he is now. You just miss him a lot. Way too much.

It's was now about 10:30 at night and you couldn't sleep. You suddenly hear the front door open. It makes you jump.

"Hello my love." Minjae greets you when he enters the room. You were surprised cause you thought he wouldn't be back till next week.

"hey! I missed you. I thought you wouldn't be able to make it till next week" You said sitting up straight on the couch.

"I wanted to surprise you. I missed your pretty face." He said as he got on his knees in front of you to be leveled with you on the couch.

You blushed hard and pushed his chest with your hand.

"I know you did." You say as you bring your face closer to his. He looked into your eyes and smirked before kissing you.

His hands cupped your cheeks deepening the kiss giving you butterflies.

He pulls away before asking, " How was your day?" You shrug and say, "It was okay, pretty uneventful. I just missed you a whole lot."

He smiled with that smile you adore so much and looks down. "Did I make you shy Minnie?" You asked with a amused look on your face.

He looks into your eyes before leaning in closer and pecking your lips once then full on kissing you.

Your hands go into his hair and you tug a little earning a groan from him.

You pull away needing to take a breath. MINJAE just looks at you breathless. "I probably should go take a shower." He says after pecking your lips one last time. " Yea, you smell." You say jokingly.

He tickles you till you Surrender. "Ok ok, go take your shower now." You say making him laugh before getting up and leaving.

He's so cute.

#kpop ambw #xikers x reader #xikers minjae #xikers fanfic #kpop imagines #kpop fanfic #kpop #kq fellaz 2 #kimminjae #minjae #xikers tricky house #shantyshantyyahyahyah

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jjksblackgf · 2 years

Text

for a good time | myg (m)

❃ Festivaled Away: Burning Memories Music Festival hosted by @bangtanbathhouse ⤞ Ticket: era of music ⤞ Main Event: based on a song ⤞ Games: phone sex

⤞ based on the song Don't Look Any Further by Dennis Edwards

pairing — phone sex operator!yoongi x fem reader summary — How many dimes does it take to make you cum, baby? genre — fluff, smut, 80's au, angst if you squint rate — 18+ word count — 3.5k warnings — explicit sexual content, nicotine use, phone sex, public (ish) sex, dirty talk, degradation, alcohol intake. author's note — big thanks to Sophie @kookskingdom for letting me use her name. I love you, baby <33

“Good morning New York City! It's 7:20 in the morning here at the Z100 station. Don’t forget to grab your coats before you leave for work, the weather is not going to be nice for those who like to stay above the 70º Fahrenheit.”

The radio host continued to make the morning announcements, but Y/N could only think of the hot coffee on her mug, and the pop tarts on her plate. She looks at the calendar placed in the kitchen, and she can almost count the days until her semester is over. She’s so not going to miss NYU when she graduates. I should’ve taken advantage of Spring Break to catch up on sleep when I had the chance.

“And now, the number one song on the charts, here at 100.3 FM… ‘We Are the World’...”

“Have a good day in class today, honey.”

“Thanks, dad.”

“Eat a big lunch later, don’t forget that you have your study session today.”

Pigs could fly, hell could freeze over, the sky could fall, Nixon could win the war on drugs, but one thing that could never happen is Y/N forgetting about her weekly study session at her campus library.

“Don’t worry, mom,” she affirms in a chipper tone.

Not much drama happens at this small two bedroom apartment. Y/N’s life is fairly normal for a 20-year-old college student. She has breakfast with her parents every morning before catching two trains from Queens to Manhattan. Then, she thanks God for having only a three block walk from the station to her classes. She works part time at a local diner, on Mondays, Tuesdays and Fridays from 1 to 7 PM, and every Thursday she spends her afternoon babysitting the neighbor’s babies while studying for her classes.

Very boring routine. Except for Wednesdays.

On the west side of Washington Square Park, in front of NYU’s Hayden Residence building, there’s a payphone that sits in between some bushes and a tree that resides inside the park’s limits. At 3 PM, while there’s a low traffic of pedestrians, she calls Magic.

“Good afternoon, Mr. Magic,” says the nasal voice. His usual 2:30 PM client, Mrs. Kelly.

“Is that what you’re calling me?” Magic asks, “I thought we agreed I was going to be the submissive today,” he adds before taking a puff of his cigarette.

“I have an emergency staff meeting in about ten minutes, so we’ll have to continue our experimentation tomorrow. I just need a quickie before I implode,”

“Okay, so why don’t you open those pretty legs for me? And you better be wearing the stockings I like if you don’t want to be punished.”

“Fuck, you’re good,” she whispers in the other line, and Magic smiles. Middle aged women are just so easy to please. “They’re all open for you, Mr. Magic. But I have been a bad girl. I’m wearing the brown ones.”

“Well then, all there’s left to do is to punish you, isn’t it?” he says before taking another hit, and Mrs. Kelly whimpers in pleasure and anticipation, “Are your office doors closed?”

“Yes, they are, Mister.”

“Tsk, that’s very bad, you see? Very, very bad!”

“W-Why?” Mrs. Kelly asks, anxiety now mixed with desire.

“Well, you’re gonna have to learn who’s really in charge here. So I need you to open that door and let everyone in that reception of yours know who’s your boss.”

“W-What?”

“You heard me, I don’t have to repeat myself,”

“Magic, I could get fired, please don’t do this to me…” Mrs. Kelly starts to beg in a whisper.

“Is Mr. Magic for you, and I don’t have all day. And if I recall correctly, you have a staff meeting in about five minutes,”

He sincerely thought he was about to lose a client, a daily client at that. He could not afford to lose a regular client, but he was in too deep now. But before he could regret it too deeply, he hears a door open on the other end of the line. He gives Mrs. Kelly a minute to readjust before giving her more orders.

“Good girl. But your punishment is just starting, darling,” Magic says as he blows smoke one more time, “You’re going to grab a pen and make a run on that ugly pantyhose. Right on that pretty little cunt. After that you’re going to write “I belong to Mr. Magic” on your inner thigh. Narrate those things while you do it so I know you’re being an obedient girl.”

2:43 PM

‘Fraternity Vacation’, that’s so interesting! Comedies are always great, even the ones with bad critic reviews, you can always count on shitty movies to…

2:43 PM

UGH! Was time never going to pass? Y/N was getting impatient for her weekly appointment, and reading and rereading the movie’s section of the paper wasn’t entertaining her like it usually does.

Such a nice blouse that lady has… Oh, what a cute puppy!... I wish I had a dog when I was growing up… That tree is getting kind of bushy… The city’s going to do something about that, but it looks so pretty right now…

Y/N was skilled on how to distract herself, and it was always a plus to live in New York City, there’s always something you can stare at and form an opinion to pass the time. She noticed many different hair cuts, how the pigeons were behaving today, the sounds of the food carts a few yards over.

It didn’t slip her mind when she started fantasizing about her and Magic. It happened often. Every time she’d notice a young couple making out, she’d wish it was her and Magic. Watching an old couple sit on a park bench and read the paper together, wishing it was her and Magic. Watching teenagers sharing an ice cream, wishing it was her and Magic.

She also had fantasies of her own. Walking through the park holding hands, pointing to her favorite tree. They would sit there and have an impromptu picnic, buying a couple of hotdogs with mustard. She would open a book and read her favorite passages, and he would listen while caressing her back and arms.

But she quickly pushed those thoughts away once she noticed an old lady smiling at her.

“Oh, I’m sorry, dear. I didn’t mean to startle you,” the old lady says “I just noticed your smile, and it reminded me of when I was about your age, my first marriage,” the lady says, longing thickening her voice. “I was so in love with my Harold, I thought I was going to throw up, and shit my pants,”

“Oh, wow!” Y/N says, not really invested in the conversation, waiting for an opening to excuse herself.

“Young love is so beautiful, your cheeks get all flushed, your head gets woozy, and you feel drunk all day…” Y/N just nods, looking around, trying to diffuse the conversation. “But you have to be careful, sugar. These men are only here to flirt with you and break your heart! You listen to me!”

“I will! Thanks for the advice,” Y/N smiles awkwardly, and finally gets out of there.

Love. What about love? That lady doesn’t know anything. I’m not in love. I’m just horny, not in love. I hope.

With the coins in the machine, she dials the known number. It only rings once before the familiar voice picks up.

“You’re never late, are you?” Magic jokes at the other end of the line. His husky voice, so luscious, sends butterflies down her stomach, making Y/N drop her guard, and laugh like a teenager in love. Shit.

“I try my best not to be,” Y/N replies, trying to keep the silly smile off her voice. No need to embarrass herself any further.

“By the way, happy early birthday,” he wishes, his voice sincere.

“Oh my God, you remembered!” Was it three weeks ago that she had mentioned her birthday party? Probably. And he remembered.

“Of course! I need you to have a wild night this Saturday, and have a drink in my honor,”

“Absolutely,” she says, screaming on the inside. Shit, I’m really in love with him.

“So, how was your day today?”

“Mostly boring. The only thing that kept me perky was the thought that I would talk to you today.”

“Oh, really? That’s flattering,” Magic says, and she fantasizes that he also has a silly smile on his face. “So we’re feeling soft today,”

“Yeah, we haven’t talked in a while.”

“Seven days to be exact,”

“Yeah…” Stop acting like he’s your boyfriend. He isn’t. Stop the fantasies! Get your shit together. “So, how was your week?”

“Fine, mostly boring work hours,” he chuckles.

“I hope you’re not saying this to the other girls. That’s not a nice way to encourage your paying clients,” Y/N scolds.

“Would you forgive me if I confessed that I thought about you this whole week?”

“I don’t think so. I’m sure you say this to every other client,”

“That’s not true. You’re the only one I read poems to,” Magic says, trying to cheer her up. He can tell she’s not well. Her voice is not as chipper as it usually is. He hears her sigh on the other end of the line. “Is there something on your mind? Talk to me,”

“I don’t know, I’m just feeling loopy today, that’s all.”

“And you don’t feel like doing anything today?”

“Actually, I think that’s kind of the opposite,” she chuckles, “Distract me, please,”

“I thought about you while taking a shower today,” Magic confesses.

“You did not!” she whispers, excited.

“I did, too!” he chuckles, “I was washing my hair, imagining if you’d like the scent of my shampoo. I was soaping my body, wishing those were your hands instead of mine.”

“Oh, God,”

“I would’ve kissed your hands before guiding them down my chest, down my abs,”

“Shut up,” she whines in a whisper, but that only entices Magic to continue.

“You would’ve reached me, and I would be ready for your hands. I would be at your mercy. There would be no commands from me, my body would be yours,�� Yoongi closes his eyes, taking a deep breath to calm himself, he’s feeling his pants getting tighter. Never with a client Yoongi wanted to cross this boundary and touch himself. At least not without being requested to.

He desperately wanted to moan her name, and touch himself, and touch her. But that would be inappropriate. So he places his free hand on his neck, firmly. This hand would not move without Y/N asking him to. But his imagination was still running wild, and there was nothing more he wanted to do than say those words to her.

“Mmhm,” Y/N prompted, her voice a little husky, sounding like she has a moaning trouble of her own.

“I would moan your name over and over. The only name I’d known in the world. Your delicate hands, so fierce for me, would make me cum, probably on your belly. But no worries. I would bite your jawline, go down your neck, licked your beautiful breasts, cleaned my cum with my tongue, before diving into that pretty pussy with my lips,”

“God damn it, you’re going to make me cum in public,”

“I would get on my knees, place your thigh on my shoulder. I would kiss your core, already wet for me. I would get hard again, just because you taste so good. Your hand would grip my hair, and you would moan for me to never stop. Not in a million years I would do that. I would circle the tip of my tongue on your clit, and too soon you would cum all over my chin,”

“I love you, Magic” she whispers. Softly, tenderly. Pink roses, chocolate, and wine. And the world stops.

His eyes, closed for the past minute, shot wide open. Her breath spikes and his heartbeat is going a million miles per hour. What?

Yoongi doesn’t know how to respond. Did she really mean what she just said? He’s never been in this situation before. This job was always fun for both parties, but it always felt transactional. There was no emotion to be felt except pleasure and lust.

That’s the thing with having mostly middle aged clients. They have always made it clear that they loved the way they felt when they talked to Magic, never did they love him. Why would they? They were aware of the fact that they didn’t know the 22-year-old on the other side of the phone. They knew the character that molds and fits to every sexual fantasy.

But to someone his age, that may be different. The potential for an emotional connection that he hadn’t anticipated. Maybe that’s better. To be seen. To have someone on the other end of the line that would like to know him. His thoughts were in disarray, but he liked the feeling of being seen.

“I have to go,” Y/N says, and before she can embarrass herself even more, she hangs up, tightening her jacket and walking the other way as fast as she can.

For the past two days, Y/N used her distraction skills to her advantage. All assignments done, took all the extra credit she could take. The neighbor’s kids were happy and tired from playing. She earned extra tips from being such a good waitress, and a compliment from her boss for the good work she was putting in.

Her room was clean beyond recognition, her vinyls in the correct sleeves, her cassettes organized in alphabetical order. Bright and early Saturday morning, after a celebratory breakfast with her parents, she cleaned the entire house.

“Why are you in such a hurry these days?” her mother asks, catching her at the bathroom door, before Y/N decides to clean something else that was already clean. “It’s your birthday, put your feet up for a minute.”

“Thank you, momma, but I want to keep busy, turn a new page.”

“Why are you turning a new leaf? You’re only 21,”

“I don’t know,” she shrugs “It just feels like a good time,”

Y/N manages to dodge her mother’s questions for the rest of the morning, locking herself in her room and beginning to color code her small closet.

She was not to think of the stupid mistake she made on Wednesday. The first time she said that to a human being that wasn’t part of her family. Granted she did say ‘I love you’ to her Prince poster, but it’s not like Prince could say it back to her.

She didn’t call Prince and give him the opportunity to say ‘I love you’ back. And when he didn’t say it back, she wasn’t heartbroken. Prince was a poster, not a human being with a phone number. The old lady was right. Men do only exist to break your heart.

The tears started to slowly drip down her cheeks. She made such a fool of herself. Falling in love with a man she never met. A man that had nothing to say, that only opened his mouth when he was offering his services.

“Heeey,” Y/N heard the door open, as Sophie entered her room “are you ready to get drunk?” Sophie whispered, closing the door behind her.

Y/N nods, looking at her boring outfit in the mirror once again. Blue jeans, white t-shirt, blue denim jacket, and white shoes. “I don’t look like a 21 year-old.”

“Don’t worry, your driver’s license will say that for you,” Sophie says. “Now, time to spice up this outfit, because you’re not leaving the house looking like this.”

A good 30 minutes later, Y/N was leaving with a whole new look. Blue jeans, black turtleneck, with black boots and lots of necklaces and bracelets. Sophie swapped their jackets, giving her black leather and taking the denim. Good thing it fit nicely with her ruffle skirt.

“Much better,” Sophie says, twirling Y/N around to look at her entire outfit. “Let’s go, Lane and Mary are meeting us there.”

Paradise Garage. The dream birthday party spot of every person in the Tri State Area. The club was full, and the crowd cheered and sang along to Donna Summer. Y/N wasn’t really in the mood to dance and be joyful. But it was her birthday, and her friends spent an amazing amount of effort to put them on the list. So the birthday drinks start coming, the DJ plays her favorite disco songs, and before she knows it, Love to Love You Baby feels like a karaoke song.

The night goes on and on, and Y/N wants to soak up all of the energy she can. She wants to enjoy her birthday party with her best friends, and she’ll get her money’s worth tonight.

“I think you need to drink some more water before we leave,” Lane says, watching her shy friend dance clumsily. It’s almost three in the morning, and the party is starting to die down.

“Don’t worry, I’m not that drunk anymore,” Y/N says, but her friends drag her across the floor anyway, sitting her on a bar stool.

“We’re going to the bathroom, do you want to go?” Mary asks, and when Y/N shakes her head, she turns to the bartender. “She’ll have water. Can you make sure she doesn't wander off? We’ll be back in just a second.”

Y/N barely pays attention to what’s happening around her, she’s enjoying herself playing with her bracelets. A bottle of water is placed in front of her, along with some peanuts. She looked up, and she knew that even drunk, she would never forget the face of this beautiful man in front of her.

“You should eat something, too,” he says, pointing at the peanuts. “Soak up the alcohol. That’s booze 101 for you,” he winks and Y/N giggles, but stops herself shortly after.

“I can’t giggle with you…” she manages to say, but her sentence drags at the end.

“And why’s that?” the bartender asks, amused.

“Because men only flirt to break your heart,” she explains, shoving peanuts in her mouth. “And you would only flirt with me because you like tips.”

“Oh, wow, who broke your heart, baby?” the man starts to clean up the mess in his counter, Y/N’s mess while she eats.

“My boyfriend, but he’s not really my boyfriend,” she tries to explain, “I don’t really know him, I only talk to him.”

“Communication is good to every relationship,”

“Yeah, well, I wouldn’t know. I only talk to him on the phone to have sex. Yeah, you heard me right,” she starts to rant, already munching on her second batch of peanuts. “I call this guy, to have sex. Through the phone, I mean. His name is Magic. And you want to know what else? I told him I loved him, like the stupid idiot that I am. And now I don’t know if I can call him again. He thinks I’m a weirdo.”

“I’m sure he doesn’t,”

“Yeah, whatever,” she scoffs, but she starts to think as the alcohol starts to wear off. “Do you think I should call him?” she asks the bartender, laying her arm on the counter and her head at the top.

“I think you should,” the bartender answers, “at the very least to break up with him, if you decide you don’t want to call him anymore,”

“What if I sound like an idiot? Can I blame you?” she asks and he laughs.

“Yes, you can come back here and kick my ass.”

Wednesday. April 24th, 1985. 3 PM. The date and hour she decided to get her heart broken again.

With the coins in the machine, she dials the known number. It only rings once before the familiar voice picks up.

“Hey,” Magic answers, his voice softer than she’d imagined it would sound like today. He didn’t even sound like he was expecting anyone else.

“Hi,” she manages to say. But she doesn’t say anything else. She doesn’t know how to proceed from here.

“When I told you I wanted you to have a drink in my honor, I didn’t imagine I was going to be the one to mix it.”

“What?”

“By the way, that leather jacket looks great on you.”

“Excuse me, what?” she asks again. Is her mind playing tricks with her? Did she actually wake up this morning, or is she having the weirdest dream? The butterflies flew wild inside her body. It was like springtime was being born inside of her.

“I don’t think you’re a weirdo. I don’t think you sound like an idiot either. I want to get to know you. But if you’re feeling silly and want to blame your bartender, I know where he lives,” he chuckles, and she joins. Stupid happy tears flowing down her face.

“I want to get to know you, too,”

“Good. My name is Yoongi,” he prompts, and her smile gets wider.

“Hi, Yoongi. My name is Y/N.”

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