#kim hongjoong imagines

[whatudowhennooneseesyou]

𝙊𝙭𝙮𝙜𝙚𝙣

Pairing: Dom Kim Hongjoong x sub!fem reader

Content Includes: smut, breathplay, love-making, it's soft but intense, kissing, clit play, unprotected sex, needy and clingy Hongjoong, praise, possessiveness, angsty, reader is referred to as 'my angel', fluff, aftercare

Word Count: 820

This should be enough for Hongjoong. 

He knows it should be. 

It’s been months, a year even. 

He knows he should be fucking over this stage. 

But spending time with you, gazing into your beautiful eyes, hearing your angelic voice and giggles, feeling the heat of you on his skin. 

Feeling how warm, tight and wet you were, seeing how fucked out you were underneath him. 

Seeing the love you had for him in your eyes and your heart stripped bare for him to have…

For him to LOVE…

For him to KEEP and CARE FOR…

It wasn’t enough. 

‘Kiss me angel, open your mouth for me, just like that…good girl’

Hongjoong’s hand was gentle and firm on your chin as he nudged your mouth open, his thrusts had stalled to a stand-still and his pupils were blown-out and his stare was HUNGRY for you. 

The veins in his neck and arms were glimmering from the sweat across his torso and chest, making the tattoos on his skin pulse and look alive from the exertion. 

His dark hair was ruffled and framing his face, cheeks red and skin glowing with lust, his lips swollen and kiss-bruised, voice gravelly and cock swollen and hard inside of you. 

Hongjoong looked wrecked, dishevelled and downright predatory in the best fucking way possible, hungry and unhinged, consumed by your presence and body. 

His mouth was on yours as he rutted against you, the tip of his cock slightly pressing against your g-spot and causing you to whimper and moan against him. 

His warm tongue feeding its way into your mouth, licking over your palate, scraping against your teeth, dominating your mouth, owning every crevice. 

‘My angel’ He breathed into your mouth, his lips grazing against yours as his hand sensually ran up your chest and rested with his fingers clasped loosely around your neck, it wasn’t rough but you can feel the pads of his fingers against your throat. 

‘Breathe out’

Hongjoong’s fingers grasped tighter around your neck and his hips snapped tighter against yours, the pressure of his fingers was causing his face to blur slightly, the coil in your stomach to rapidly tighten and your eyes to flutter shut in a downright feeling of euphoria. 

A staggered exhale left your lips which Hongjoong swallowed with a kiss, his free hand clenched tightly in your hair and a moan rumbled through his chest. 

‘Beautiful, so beautiful…now you need to breathe me in too’

He removed his hand from your hair and reached up to remove one that was draped around his shoulders, kissing the pads of your knuckles as he stared at you with intention before wrapping your hand around his neck. 

‘Now squeeze’ 

Hongjoong’s hand covered yours and he controlled the pressure as his eyes became dilated and his bottom lip pouted even further, his thrusts faltering. 

He removed his hand and you immediately lifted your head up to kiss him, moving your hand to the base of his neck as your breath caught his. 

‘My angel, my treasure’ Hongjoong moaned out as he grabbed the headboard with his free hand, the act of consuming your soul almost brought out a frenzy in him, his head hovering over yours as he pounds into you, the force shaking you from the inside out. 

‘You’re under my skin, you’re in my heart, I’m drowning in you and I don’t want it to ever fucking STOP’ 

Hongjoong’s voice sounded almost pained through his confession, as if those words were scraping to venture from the very confines of his soul. 

You were rapidly reaching your release and frantically trailing a hand down to draw circles on your clit, though an orgasm was the least of your priorities. 

The feeling of love and care was never as potent with Hongjoong as it is when he’s making love to you. 

When the mask is thrown away and his barriers are down, when you feel his devotion flowing through his tongue and fingers, the way he worships your body and soul like it was his sole purpose in life. 

You really were his treasure and he was yours too. 

‘You’re my treasure too Hongjoong…I love yo-’ 

Your words were cut off by your impending orgasm crashing around you, your head lolled back as your body quivered under Hongjoong’s touch and your vision went white. 

A few thrusts and Hongjoong came inside of you with a whimper, his brow furrowed and lip bitten, his head collapsing into the crook of your neck as you wrapped around each other loosely in a state of post-coital bliss. 

A few moments passed of comfortable silence, your fingers gently ruffling Hongjoong’s sweaty hair as his head was on your chest, listening to your heartbeat, feeling you breathe against him- your breath now filled with a part of his soul. 

‘We’re bound together angel, now, forever and in the next life’. 

I just realised it's been months since I've written Hongjoong and this fic can be included in my 'sugar!daddy' Hongjoong universe.

Enjoy!

Taglist: @hipster-shiz @creativechaoticloner @cherry-0420 @scuzmunkie @marievllr-abg @umbralhelwolf @stardragongalaxy @starsareseen @lino-jagiyaa @mischiefsmind @mrcarrots @junieshohoho @partywithgyu @whatsk-poppinhomies @craxy-person @hologramhoneymoon @gyuhanniescarat @staytinyinmybpack @necessiteez @wooyoungmybelovedhusband @berryberrytan @laylasbunbunny @bangchanbabygirlx @i-love-ateez @anyamaris @youre-alittle-taste-of-hell @krishastumblernow @hexheathen @michel-angelhoe @northerngalxy @justaaveragereader @shroomoth @marykpoppin @ja3hwa @leomggg

#ateez smut #ateez hard hours #kpop smut #kim hongjoong smut #hongjoong smut #atz smut #kpop fanfiction #ateez angst #kim hongjoong imagines #hongjoong x reader #atz x reader #kpop thoughts #ateez drabbles #hongjoong ateez #kim hongjoong x reader #atz fanfic #ateez fanfic #kpop fanfic #kim hongjoong x y/n #hongjoong x y/n #kpop fic #atz fluff

[jjunberry]

still she’s on her knees

pairing! jeong yunho x fem!reader, kim hongjoong x fem!reader

genre! smut, angst

warnings! cheating, creampies, pet names, semi-public sex, van sex, pussy slapping, slight dacryphilia, etc.

synopsis! sneaking off with yunho and hongjoong doesn’t know, don’t tell hongjoong based off scotty doesn’t know by lustra

wc! 3.3k

the air was thick and sweat coated your body. you laid against his chest. both of you breathing heavily. the windows of the van tinted but condensation formed on it from the heat. his hand traced up and down your arm. “we can’t keep doing this.” you voiced breaking the peaceful silence.

yunho’s eyebrows furrowed. “baby come on, what he doesn’t know won’t hurt him.” he pulled you closer to him. your body relaxed against his. your bodies fit so perfectly together, yet it was so wrong.

your phone ringtone blared through the van. yunho took notice of his name and his picture. the name followed by a heart. collecting yourself you hit answer. “hi baby.” you greeted an excited hongjoong.

yunho started leaving kisses down your neck. his teeth nibbling at your collarbone. you bit down on your lip trying not to moan. “oh, mm that’s..that’s nice.” you managed to get out. yunho’s hand cupped your heat causing you to gasp. “are you okay?” hongjoong asked concerned as always. bless his unaware mind. “y-yes, listen i have to go.” you quickly hung up after he said his goodbye.

yunho flipped you onto your back attacking your neck in kisses. your moans filled the van. his big hands roamed and groped your body. squeezing every part of you he could. yunho pumped himself a few times to get fully hard before he pushed into you. no matter how many times you took him it always felt like the first.

your legs wrapped around his waist as he began to thrust forward. his tip hitting against your cervix. your nails scratched down his back. yunho threw his head back with a groan as his hips snapped against yours. the motion caused the van to rock. “i’m close.” you moaned. yunho grunted snapping his hips roughly. “me too.”

you bucked your hips to meet his. the new angle drove yunho crazy. he used his thumb to tease your clit sending you over the edge. your legs shook as your orgasm washed over you.

yunho’s actions stilled as he spilled into you. his head thrown back. his neck vein popped out. yunho pulled out which caused you to wince at the loss. he left kisses up your body stopping at your lips.

you giggled pushing him back slightly. “okay big guy, that’s enough for tonight.” he grinned at you before rolling onto his back. sitting up you reached for your clothes. you could feel his cum leaking as you slipped your panites and shorts on. yunho laid with his hands behind his head. his eyes trailed every inch of your body.

“take me home?” you asked. yunho nodded climbing into the driver’s seat not bothering to put on a shirt. the sun had set a while ago. his hand rested comfortably on your thigh as he drove the back ways to your house. he always did this because he hated when you left him for the night. he hated when you left to go back to him.

you hopped out of his van squeezing your legs together to keep the cum from running down your legs. “same time tomorrow?” he asked. you frowned. “i can’t tomorrow, i’m having dinner with hongjoong and his family.” yunho couldn’t keep the eye roll to himself. “it’s only for a few hours then maybe i’ll let you come pick me up.” you grinned.

the boy groaned white knuckling his steering wheel. “you kill me baby.” you giggled before blowing him a kiss which he caught and placed over his semi hard erection. you laughed before taking off towards your house.

yunho hated watching you go. he wished you were his, but you weren’t you were hongjoong’s. it wasn’t fair was it? sure hongjoong was his friend. that’s how yunho met you. it wasn’t fair hongjoong had you first. it wasn’t fair hongjoong got to love you in public while yunho was your dirty secret you’d only see in the dead of night.

he could remember every detail of what lead up to the moment you fell into bed with him. it was his favorite day. when he finally got a taste of you. a taste he knew he never wanted to lose.

the party had been full swing. you hadn’t seen hongjoong in a while and you were starting to get bored. your eyes scanned the livingroom until you noticed him. he was dancing with a girl, a girl who was in town visiting. he claimed he had no feelings for her, yet you could read her like an open book.

the feelings she had for hongjoong written all over her face. when he introduced you as his girlfriend you swear by her eyes narrowing she was planning a million different ways to get rid of you. you of course told hongjoong but he of course brushed it off. “she was just surprised she’s happy for me, for us.”

your insecurities and the alcohol got the better of you. immediately you left the room in search of air. your body was met with a strong frame stopping all movement. a pair of hands came out to steady you. “woah slow down killer.” his voice was deep. you looked up locking eyes with yunho. one of hongjoong’s friends.

“i’m sorry.” you mumbled. his eyes scanned your face. “what’s wrong?” he sounded concerned. “it’s nothing, just need some air.” yunho frowned looking up towards the crowd. his eyes immediately finding hongjoong. “okay, let’s go get air.” you furrowed your eyebrows. “you don’t have to come with me.”

yunho smiled. “nonsense, i need air too we might as well keep each other company.” you just sighed and nodded. yunho placed his hand on your lower back guiding you towards the back door.

the fire from earlier was still going. not many people outside, everyone having already moved inside. yunho sat next to you in front of the fire. “so you want to tell me what’s going on in that pretty little head of yours?” he asked. his eyes were trained on you. “yunho.” your voice warned. he was never shy about flirting.

he grinned. “okay, but seriously what’s wrong?” yunho leaned closer to you. you sighed. “it’s hongjoong he’s dancing with her, like i’m not here? i mean if she wanted someone to dance with there was plenty of other guys why joong?” you were ranting now but yunho followed every word. “she’s always been into him so i’m not surprised.” he shrugged.

your heart sank. of course she was. why all of a sudden did she want hongjoong now. you sighed leaning closer to the fire to warm your hands. “don’t let it get to you.” his voice was closer to you now. you nodded. your eyes meeting his.

his eyes darted down to your lips before looking back into your eyes. “tell me to stop and i will.” his deep voice sent chills up your spine. yunho dipped down capturing your lips against his.

red flags and alarm bells went through your head. yet you couldn’t bring yourself to stop. he had one hand on the back of your neck and one on your waist. your hands tightly gripped his shirt. his lips moved against you. it was rough, sloppy and yunho couldn’t get enough of you.

the burning in your lungs had you pulling away taking in deep breaths of air. both of your lips swollen and eyes glazed over. he leaned in for another kiss but your hand against his chest stopped him.

“i- we shouldn’t.” your voice was small. guilt slowly ate away at you. yunho sighed but nodded. you stood and made your way back inside. thinking of ways to tell hongjoong what happened. your eyes found him immediately. his arm was wrapped around her waist as she sat in his lap. “hongjoong?” you asked walking up to him and his friends.

“oh hi baby.” he greeted. by his voice you could tell he was drunk. she smirked. “let’s go home joongie it’s late.” he nodded nudging her off. he stood and wrapped his arms around you. ever the clingy drunk. your heart wrenched.

you wanted to scream and yell at her. however you had no right to.

you never did tell hongjoong. that night wasn’t the last time with yunho either. it started to happen every sunday. as scheduled. he’d pick you up and take you away in his van.

every sunday you’d go with yunho, and hongjoong had no idea. you made yunho swear to never tell.

hot water poured over your shoulders. a must needed shower after your visit with yunho. your phone ringing cut your shower short.

you shut the water off and quickly wrapped a towel around yourself. “hello?” you answered. “hi babe.” hongjoong greeted. “dinner with my family is at eight pm tomorrow and good news hana is coming.” he said. your heart wreched. “why is hana coming?” you asked. hongjoong sighed. “y/n please don’t start.”

“hongjoong you can’t be serious.” you were getting angry. “my family loves her, they want her there i’m sorry i don’t know what to tell you.” you couldn’t stop the scoff. “then why am i even going?” it was his turn to scoff. “y/n.” his voice was stern. tired of the same argument. “i’ll see you tomorrow at eight.” he said before hanging up.

you groaned face planting onto your bed before screaming into your pillow.

before you knew it your alarm was ringing. of course you didn’t want to get up. dread and anxiety ate away at you as you got ready for the day.

thoughts of hongjoong and hana, thoughts of his family liking her more than you. pushing those feelings down you looked over yourself in the mirror. the polaroids of yourself on hongjoong stuck to it mocking you at this point.

the drive to the restaurant was a quiet one. his family was parked there along with an all to familiar van. your heart was racing as you parked your car next to his van. your eyes scanned the restaurant when you entered. finding the table quickly since it was a big party having dinner. they rented the event table.

the seats next to hongjoong were taken up by his mother and hana of course. the only open seat being one next to yunho. yunho? why was he here? “hi love.” hongjoong greeted before going back to his conversation. no hug or kiss hello. just a simple hi before he was back to her.

you sighed before sitting down next to yunho. he grinned seeing you. “hi y/n.” he voice was deep. you couldn’t help but rub your thighs together. “what are you doing here?” you whispered. “oh i came to pick up some take out but ran into hongjoong and he invited me to stay.” he answered before taking a sip of his wine.

his long slender fingers wrapped around the delicate glass. your eyes following the cup as he brought it to his plump lips. the red liquid disappearing. “it’s good, want some?” he tipped it towards you. heat rose in your cheeks. “i’ll have some later.” he smirked. “good girl, have fun.” good girl? you tried so hard to not squirm in your seat. i mean you were having dinner with your boyfriend and his family and his friend had your panties getting damper.

his family did little to nothing to include you in conversations. all of them in awe of hongjoong and hana. you we’re starting to feel annoyed more than anxious. you didn’t even know why you were here. convinced “hongjoong bring your girlfriend.” met “hongjoong bring hana.”

they haven’t even brought the meals yet and you were already on your third glass of wine. hongjoong furrowed his eyebrows. “maybe cut back love.” he said. you grinned fakely. “of course.” yunho noticed the white in your knuckles from gripping the glass.

he placed his hand on your thigh. it didn’t distract you from the glare his mom sent. the conversations around the table went on. you couldn’t focus on them. not with yunho’s fingers inching up your thighs. you glared a yunho when his finger brushed over your heat.

he just smirked before sipping his wine. your teeth sunk into your bottom lip when his fingers slipped past your panties and dipped into you. even his fingers filled you up. the tips of his fingers brushed against that spongy spot deep inside you.

your teeth biting harder on your lip as sweat beads around your hairline. his fingers continued to work you as the waiters began to bring the plates of food. your release was building and your brain became foggy. his fingers worked faster and your body stiffened as your orgasm washed over you.

yunho smirked, feeling your juices leak around his fingers. “y/n you and yunho seem awfully close.” your eyes snapped towards hana. hongjoong furrowed his eyebrows noticing how close you were. “were just sitting here.” you mumbled. “shame you weren’t here earlier to sit here, joongie got tired of waiting for you so he said i could sit here.”

her smirked had your blood boiling. “joongie likes my company so i guess it’s okay.” you smiled sickenly sweet. “well at least someone enjoys your company.” the girl glared at your words. “y/n that’s uncalled for.” hongjoong said. “sweetie don’t be jealous it’s an ugly look.” his mother added. you scoffed. of course.

before you could say anything the scraping of yunho’s chair being pushed back caught everyone’s attention. he stood tall. “i’ve heard and seen enough. dinner was delightful, however i’m ready for dessert now.” he reached his hand towards you. your eyes widened. “what the hell?” hongjoong asked. your eyes scanned the room taking in their judgemental and hateful stares.

deciding you finally had enough you took yunho’s hand. he pulled you up and against his side. “y/n what the fuck?” hongjoong asked. “if you’ll excuse us, were going to go fuck now. enjoy your dinner.”

you were sure hongjoong’s eyes almost fell out with how wide they got. his mother and hana’s mouths dropped in shock. as whispers took over the dinner table. you didn’t care though. not when yunho squeezed your hand and pulled you away.

the both of you taking off running towards his van. he opened the door for you making sure you were inside before taking off to his side. he slid in and started the van. “oh my god..oh my god did that just happen?” you asked. the shock finally starting to wear off. yunho smirked. “yeah, sorry it had to be that way but i couldn’t take how they were treating you.”

you smiled, taking his hand in yours. “thank you.” he drove to your house. your eyes widened. “my house?” you asked. “as much as i love fucking you dumb in the back of my van, i want to take care of you properly.” your cheeks heated up at his words. “then take care of me.”

yunho rounded the van and opened your door. his hands gripped your hips as he lifted you over his shoulder. you giggled as he carried you. his large hand landing a slap on your bottom.

he kicked his shoes off before taking you to your bedroom. there he laid you down. he helped you pull your dress over your head. leaving you in your matching dark blue set. his eyes trailed your form. he bit his lip. “you’re so beautiful baby.” his hands trailed up your body. squeezing every inch of you he could grab. goosebumps rose in the wake of his touch.

his fingertips lighting a fire under your skin. yunho used his fingers to tilt your chin up. he leaned down and kissed you. when he released your lips he pulled his shirt over his head. your eyes trailed down his body. “see something you like?” he smirked. you bit your lip. “of course.”

yunho grinned and slid down between your legs. his breath fanned over your entrance. you squirmed and bucked your hips. his hands came up to your hips forcing them down against the bed. “be patient princess.” he scolded.

a whine left your lips and you gripped his hair. “please yunho i need you.” yunho left a smack on your pussy. “i said patience princess don’t be a brat.” another whined escaped you before yunho attached mouth to your aching cunt. his tongue doing wonders.

your body felt like it was on fire as his tongue circled your clit. the sensation had you seeing stars. as the knot grew in your stomach, yunho’s movements didn’t slow down. “i-i’m cumming.” you managed to get out. yunho worked you faster triggering your orgasm. heat washed over your body as you stilled and tried to catch your breath.

yunho pulled away from your heat as your juices dripped from his chin. he wiped his lips with the back of his hand and smirked at you. “you did so well baby.” he praised. he crawled up your body caging you under himself. his bulge rub against your sensitive cunt. yunho smirked when the whimper left your lips.

“is my princess sensitive?” he asked. you nodded. his hands roamed your body groping and squeezing every piece of flesh he could. yunho leaned down and kissed your neck before sucking the skin. he left red marks in his wake. satisfied he could finally mark what was his.

“please yunho i need you.” you begged. his eyes met yours and he smirked seeing the tears welling in your waterline. he freed himself from his boxers. he was already hard. his length always took your breath away. he used two of his fingers to collect some of your slickness and he spread it over his dick.

he teased your entrance before pushing himself all the way in. you moaned out as he bottomed out. you could feel the stretch of his length. you felt so full. yunho groaned feeling you squeeze him. “i haven’t even moved yet baby.” his voice was deep. “p-please.” you had tears. he groaned before moving his hips out and slamming back in.

his hips moved against yours at a deep slow pace. the room was filled with a mix of moans, grunts and the squeaking of the box springs.

“you take me so well baby. look how full you are.” he placed your hand over the bulge in your tummy. “feel me?” he asked. you could only moan and nod. you were to fucked out to formulate words.

you whined and squeezed around him. “y-yunho i’m close please.” he grunted. “it’s okay princess let it go.” with his permission you let your less wash over you for the third time. yunho snapped his hips against yours faster chasing his high.

finally he stilled and spilled his warm cum inside you, painting your walls white. he rested his forehead against yours. the both of you breathing heavily. yunho moved to leave kisses along your cheeks and down your neck.

you smiled wrapping your arms around his neck and pulling him against your chest. he could hear your heartbeat settling. “hey i’m sorry about dinner. i just couldn’t keep letting them ignore you then belittle you when they did talk to you.” he was getting frustrated.

combing your fingers through his hair, you smiled. “it’s okay yunho, our break up was bound to happen. i’m just happy to be with you all the time now.” your voice was soft. yunho lifted his head up and pressed his lips to yours. “me too.” yunho rolled to the side and sat up.

he left and came back with a towel. carefully he cleaned between your legs. his eyes taking in your body covered in his marks. his. you were finally his.

“come lay with me.” you whispered. yunho was quick to lay next you , taking you into his arms. “i’m glad he knows now.”

“he had to know.”

-

author’s note! sorry for the wait on this one i got a little carried away. i’m trying to get better at writing longer fics for everyone

tag list! @jjunieworld @304files

love, echo ☁️⋅♡𓂃 ࣪

© jjunberry

#jeong yunho #jeong yunho x reader #jeong yunho imagines #jeong yunho smut #kim hongjoong #kim hongjoong x reader #kim hongjoong imagines #kim hongjoong smut #ateez #ateez x reader #ateez imagines #ateez reactions #ateez angst #ateez smut #kpop x reader #kpop imagine #kpop imagines #kpop smut #kpop angst #kpop reactions #kpop preferences #kpop writers #jjunberry

[woojoongstreasure]

A Pleasant Surprise | Kim Hongjoong 

Pairing: Kim Hongjoong x Fem!reader 

Request: from anon.  

Summary: Hongjoong's growing family visit him on tour. 

Warnings: Pregnancy. Wooyoung 'kidnapping' their daughter. 

Word Count: 1,003

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“Appa!” Ha-Joon excitedly calls out to her father from her Uncle Yunho's shoulders. The kind-hearted giant gently lifts her off his shoulders and places her on the ground, while Hongjoong turns around upon hearing his daughter's familiar voice. His eyes widen with surprise as she rushes towards him. As soon as she reaches him, he scoops her up in his arms, showering her with hugs and kisses. The three-year-old bursts into giggles.   

"I'll give you some alone time," Yunho says, wanting to give the little family some space.   

"Thank you, Yunho," Y/N expresses her gratitude and walks over to her husband as he leaves to go back to the rest of the guys.  

“Isn’t this a pleasant surprise,” Hongjoong smiles, greeting her with a kiss. “I thought you couldn’t get time off work?”  

“I managed to find someone to cover for me,” she tells him. “I just have to get you all to sign her daughter’s album.” She pats her handbag, letting him know she’s got it with her.  

“We can do that,” he smiles and kisses her once more. "I've missed both of you," he says, playfully tickling their daughter. Ha-Joon lets out loud giggles as she squirms in his arms.  

“We miss-” Y/N's words are abruptly interrupted by Wooyoung’s loud high-pitched voice, echoing through the auditorium as he calls out to their daughter.  

“JJoon-ie! Kim Ha-Joon-ie!”  

Ha-Joon claps her hands in delight, unable to contain her excitement at seeing her favourite uncle. She loves and adores all her uncles and has a very special bond with them, but there is something extra special about her bond with Wooyoung, which earned him the title of godfather much to the others’ dismay.  

“Uncle Youngie!” she shouts back to him as she scrambles out of her father's arms and runs towards her favourite uncle.   

“You couldn’t wait five more minutes?” Hongjoong says, annoyed.  

“I’ll give her back in an hour or two,” he says and walks away. “Say bye to Eomma and Appa!”  

“Bye, Appa, Eomma!” Ha-Joon waves her tiny hand at her parents over Wooyoung’s shoulder as they disappear behind the stage.  

“I should text Seonghwa to make sure they don’t get into too much trouble,” Hongjoong says pulling out his phone and sending a message to right hand man.   

“I’m sure they’ll be fine,” she tries to reassure her husband who did this every time Wooyoung looks after their little girl.   

"You know how mischievous they can be," Hongjoong replies, his worry evident in his voice.   

"I know, but he loves her just as much as we do," she says, trying to ease his concerns. "He always makes sure she's safe and doesn’t get into too much trouble."   

“I should also tell them not to eat too much candy. I don’t want her having a sore stomach like last time,” he adds.   

“Baby,” she says taking his face in her hands and making focus on her and not his phone. “They’ll be fine.”  

Hongjoong nods, reluctantly accepting her reassurance, but he can't help but worry. Being a father has made him more protective than ever.  

“You’re right,” he sighs. “How have you been? Has the sickness eased off yet? Has Eomma been helping?” he questions placing a hand on her lower stomach, feeling the small bump that’s now forming.   

Hongjoong feels bad that he can’t be with her during this time. After almost missing the birth of his daughter he vowed never to miss any of his other children’s births. Her being pregnant at the start of their tour meant he had more of a chance at being home for this one’s birth. But still, it didn’t make him feel any better that he was missing appointments, feeling and watching her bump form and being there for her during this time.   

“It’s eased off a lot. I’m still a little nauseous. Eomma has been wonderful. She’s practically living at our house, helping with the chores, looking after Ha-Joon, making sure we have plenty of food and are eating well,” she assures him. “Your brother has even stopped by a few times to take Ha-Joon to the park.”  

“I hate that I can’t be there,” he says with a mix of emotions.   

"We're managing, don't worry," she attempts to reassure him again.  

"But I do worry," he admits, his voice filled with longing. "I want to be there for every moment. I want to hold your hand during the ultrasounds and see our little moving about,” he continues, taking one of your hands in his. “I want see our child grow inside you and feel him kick for the first time."   

She reaches out and takes his hand, giving it a reassuring squeeze. "I know, Hongjoong. I want you there too, but we knew this was a possibility. And it’s okay. You’re doing what you love, and I support you all the way."   

He nods, understanding her words but still feels a pang of guilt. "I just don't want you to feel like you’re alone and like I'm not there for you."   

She smiles softly, eyes filled with nothing but love. “I have never felt that way. And I’m not alone. We have an amazing support system back home and even though we’re not physically together while you’re away, you’ve always been there for me."   

“When you go back home, I want photos and videos every day. I want to see the bump grow, I want to see the ultrasounds and everything I’m missing while I’m not there,” he tells her.  

“I can do that,” she smiles, feeling herself get emotional.   

“Good,” he hugs her and kisses the side of her head. Letting her go, he says, “I think it’s been an hour.”  

Confused, she looked at the time, seeing that only 10 minutes had passed. “It’s only been 10 minutes.”  

“Wooyoung can look after her later,” he says wrapping an arm around her shoulders and leads her out of the auditorium. “Right now, I want to be with both my girls.” '

©️ no one has permission to copy, translate and/or repost my works on here or anywhere else. 

Likes, Comments & Reblogs are welcomed and appreciated. 

TAGGED: @staytiny2000 - @dancelikebutterflywings - @kpopmenace143 - @treehouse-mouse - @alexxavicry - @jedi-dreea - @rainydayteacups - @green-agent - @tinyelfperson

#kim hongjoong #ateez #hongjoong #kim hongjoong x reader #ateez x reader #hongjoong x reader #kim hongjoong x y/n #ateez x y/n #hongjoong x y/n #ateez imagines #ateez fics #kim hongjoong imagines #kim hongjoong fics #ateez hongjoong #kim hongjoong scenarios #dad!hongjoong #kpop imagines #kpop fics #atz #atz x reader #atz fics

[sadienita]

[1:01] “Joong, where- ugh!” You groaned as you spun around to find Hongjoong way behind you yet again. You were meant to be on a cute date, a first date in fact, because after a year of pining Hongjoong had finally mustered up the courage to ask you out. Despite his clear nerves it had been lovely.

Or mostly lovely.

Because despite taking you out to lunch and then to a cute cafe and now for a walk in the park, he had also brought his camera along. And he couldn’t seem to help himself, stopping at every pretty sight to snap a photo, not to mention about fifty photos each from the cafe and restaurant of your food.

It was cute really, but it did mean his attention kept wandering. If you didn’t know him well it might have been rude. But you knew how shy he could be and you could see how nervous he was even if he hid it well. So you simply gave him a smile when he met your gaze with a confused “huh?”

“I’m walking alone.” You chuckled.

“O-Oh, sorry.” He mumbled, scurrying to meet you. He looked even cuter as the blush on his cheeks matched the pink on the tip of his nose from the cold weather. “I got distracted.”

“Was it a good picture?” You hummed.

“Yeah I think so, I think I have at least a few good ones from today. It’s nice that it snowed.” He gazed over the hedge at a few young girls making snow ducks at the side of the walking path. “Everything looks pretty when it snows.”

“Even me?” You teased.

“Y-You always look pretty.” He said quickly. When you glanced at him he was blushing harder. You nudged him with your arm and he looked at you.

“You’re pretty too.”

“You’re just saying that cuz I said it.” He countered.

You put a hand over your heart. “I swear I’m telling the truth.” You reached over to pinch his nose which made him jump. “You’re adorable.”

“I think you just like teasing me.” He muttered.

“I liked teasing you before you asked me out.” You said. “It‘s familiar. It should comfort you.”

“It does the opposite.”

You stepped in front of him, stopping him as you grinned at him. “Do I make you all nervous now, Joongie?”

A blush rushed up his cheeks as he ducked his head. “Why did I think confessing to you was a smart idea?”

“Do I make your heart race?”

“I should have known you would just torture me.”

“Bet you wanna kiss me, don’t you?”

Hongjoong grabbed his camera again, forcing it between the two of you, almost as if creating his own little bubble to withstand your teasing. “Let me take your picture.” He said.

“You didn’t answer any of my questions.” You laughed. He nudged you backwards.

“You already know I like you, do I have to admit to everything?” He mumbled.

“It’s more fun if you do.” You said, wandering down the path as he found you in his viewfinder.

“Don’t I make you feel the same way, anyways?”

Yes. 

Yes, I feel butterflies in my stomach everytime you call my name.

Yes, I feel my heart racing a mile a minute each time you look at me.

Yes, I want you to kiss me.

But you couldn’t just say those things out loud.

“You make me feel…” You thought for a moment as you gazed up at the snow covered branches of the tree. “Make me feel-”

“Wait! Don’t move!” Hongjoong’s sudden exclamation made you jump a little but you held still after that, hearing the snap of his camera shutter. It went off a few more times before you looked at him, ending with him getting one more of you looking right into the camera. You could feel the heat warming you from the inside out as he shyly brought the camera down. He looked so pretty, the shy smile on his face, cheeks and nose tinted pink. The way he looked at you had your heart hammering in your chest, like you were his whole world.

“Sorry, you- it’s a really good picture.” He cleared his throat, tone hopeful when he spoke again. “What were you saying? About how I make you feel?”

A smile tugged at your lips. You didn’t say anything in response, instead waking back down the path towards him. Hongjoong let out a yelp as you dug your fingers into his scarf and pulled him in, pressing your lips to his in a sweet kiss that made your heart feel like it had an entire fireworks display going off.

When you pulled back Hongjoong looked just as dazed as you felt.

“You make me feel love.” You hummed, before kissing him again.

#a gift #for a lovely and dear friend #i hope you like it uwu #ateez imagines #hongjoong imagines #kim hongjoong imagines #hongjoong x reader #ateez x reader #ateez fluff

[makeitmingi]

Just A Phone Call Away

Genre: Romance, Angst

Pairing: Hongjoong x Reader (y/n)

Characters: exGirlfriend!Reader, exBoyfriend!Hongjoong

Summary: Your relationship didn't work out, the only thing it did was fill your friendship with awkwardness and regret. But when the other is in need of comforting, you still drop everything and run to each other. After all, you're both just a phone call away.

Word count: 7.1k

Warning(s): lowkey toxic ex-lovers relationship, sprinkles of jealousy, potentially emotional triggers for some. Please read at your own discretion.

[A/N: Hongjoong is just a producer/ song writer in this, not an idol. Ateez isn't an idol group. (y/n) and Hongjoong's friends don't hate each other, they just disagree with the actions of the ex couple. The couple didn't work out for whatever reason. No matter what their lingering feelings are now.]

30th September, Saturday, 9:27pm

Your front door suddenly opened, making you look up from the movie that was playing on the television in front of you. Seeing that it wasn't some stranger entering your house to cause you alarm, you turned back to the movie, simultaneously eating a spoon of rice.

Also, he had called 30 minutes before to tell you he was stopping by. No questions, just a declaration. So you were expecting him.

"Ughhhhhhh." The visitor groaned, falling onto the empty space of the couch next to you. Rolling your eyes, you ignored him but he continued to annoyingly groan.

"Tch. What do you want?" You clicked your tongue. You paused the movie and turned to him.

"Yah..." You tapped his head with the bottom of your bowl.

"How can you just casually eat when I'm in distress?" He asked. You tilted your head, chewing your food before swallowing. You let out a sigh of defeat, reaching to put the bowl down on the table.

"Come here." You spoke softly. He moved immediately, pushing you to lie down and rest his head against your chest.

"Nothing's working out." He mumbled.

"What's not working out?" You probed further, hand coming up to stroke the back of his head.

"I've been camping at the studio for 2 weeks and have not produced a single beat, much less a track or instrumental. I think I've lost my touch." He said. You sighed, his studio work was always something that stressed him out. It was unhealthy for how much of a workaholic he was.

"If you're gonna come here and start speaking bullcrap, I'm kicking you out." You threatened.

"No..." He shook his head, hands coming to squeeze your waist like a child, as if you were really going to kick him out. You hoped he couldn't hear the way your heart lurched.

"Hey, don't sleep yet. Do you want food?" You asked. When you felt him nod, you got up and went to the kitchen.

"What did you cook?" He came up behind you, wrapping his arms around you.

"Fried rice. I was lazy." You explained. You took the remains and scraped them into a new bowl for him. The leftovers were going to be your lunch tomorrow but it's fine.

"Here." You poured flaked seaweed over before handing him the bowl. He sat at the small dining table in the kitchen, eating and watching you clean up. You did the dishes before wiping down the counter and the stove top.

"Your cooking always reminds me of home." He commented. You froze slightly at his words, chewing on your bottom lip. Luckily you were facing away from him that he couldn't see your reaction.

"Don't eat and talk, you'll choke." You forced a chuckle.

"I'm going to shower, can you do the dishes when you're done?" You asked. He nodded, giving you a thumbs up as he shovelled more food into his mouth.

"Slow down, no one is going to take the food away from you." You patted his back.

"Go shower. I'll shower after." He said betwen chews. You hummed and left him in the kitchen, going to have your shower.

Kim Hongjoong, also known as Producer Hongjoong, Songwriter Hongjoong. But before any of those things, you knew him as student Kim Hongjoong, the boy you met during your first year of college. You clicked instantly and became inseparable. He was also the first boy you truly loved.

After a few years of friendship, you both tried dating. It was some of the best moments of your life. One of your best friends was your lover, you practically spent every waking moment with him.

But ultimately, you grew too comfortable with each other, one thing led to another and in the end, you both that it was best for you to part ways.

You regretted acting on your feelings because the relationship only made your friendship awkward and uncomfortable.

If you knew you would end up losing your best friend, you would have kept your feelings to yourself.

When you broke up, you both promised to remain 'friends'. You promised that in times of need, you were both just a phone call away to give the other person some comforting. Hongjoong would come to you, like he did now, and you would go to him.

*KNOCK KNOCK*

"Aein, where's my towel?" You broke out of your train of thought to see Hongjoong's silhouette through the door. One more thing, Hongjoong never got rid of his nickname for you 'sweetheart'.

"Oh, I moved it to be with your clothes. Bottom left drawer of my dresser." You replied.

"Okay, I'll go find it. Thanks!" He walked away. You let out a long sigh, lifting your head to let the shower rain on you, hoping it'll wash away whatever you were feeling. You lightly slapped your cheeks, you needed to pull yourself together.

"Joong, I'm done." You announced as you stepped out, drying your hair with your smaller towel. Hongjoong stood up from the couch. He smiled when he saw you.

"You always look cute in my old shirts. I've always told you that you pull off any style you wear." He complimented.

"I'm literally in pyjamas... Just go shower. I'm going to sleep." You scoffed.

"No! Wait for me!" He protested, running to the shower. You honestly didn't think about it when you pulled the shirt to wear. Most of your closet was curated by Hongjoong anyway, even before you dated.

After doing your skincare, you sat on the bed and scrolled through your social media.

"Ah! That felt good!" Hongjoong came in, tossing his towel aside and diving straight for the bed.

"Joong, you didn't come your hair after you blow dried it. It's gonna be all messy when you wake up tomorrow." You lectured. Hongjoong never combs his hair, you would comb it for him or nag him to do it. Because his hair would get tangled in the morning. He ignore you and laid his head in your lap.

"It'll be fine." He assured, scrolling on his own phone. Your hands habitually came up to pat his head, your fingers combing through his freshly dried hair.

"By the way, did you change your soap?" He asked, still looking at his screen.

"Mhmm, a friend was using it. Some rose and geranium one, I thought it smelt nice so I asked where he got it." You explained.

"He?" He stopped and put his phone down to gaze up at you. You suddenly felt like you were being interrogated, also looking away from your phone to look down and meet his eyes.

"Yeah... Why?"

"What guy uses rose and geranium soap? And how close were you to him that you could smell him?" He asked with a scoff of disbelief.

"To answer your first question, you do. Because you've just used my soap. And for your second question, he was sitting next to me and I noticed. That's all." You replied.

"Right..." Hongjoong frowned slightly, pursing his lips.

"What's the big deal? It's just soap. You didn't complain when you used it." You raised an eyebrow.

"Nothing." He shook his head and turned back to his phone. You stared at the side of his face for a few seconds before going back to your social media scrolling. But Hongjoong's pointed questions and change in tone bothered you slightly. Was he... jealous?

"Joong, you don't have to stress and bother about the studio stuff, alright? I know you'll make it work out, you always do." You spoke softly, wanting to move on from whatever that was.

"You don't know that... My career... is so fickle..." He said with a sigh, putting his phone down.

"You're right, I don't. But forcing yourself to do something for 2 weeks isn't going to help either." You replied.

"What do you think I should do then?" He turned to lay on his back to look at you again. You did the same, putting your phone on the charging dock on your nightstand.

"Take a break." You smiled softly as you let your fingers continue to run through his hair.

"A break?" He tilted his head.

"Yeah. Who knows, you might get struck with inspiration. Don't think about the deadlines, think about the music and let it speak to you." You told him. Hongjoong stayed silent, he was wrong, you did know. You knew everything about the hardships of producing and songwriting because it was one of the things that broke you two up.

"How do you always know what to say, aein?" He smiled softly.

"You'll get out of this rut, just like you always do. Look at all the hits you've produced, I believe in you and your talent. This is just another hurdle you'll jump over." You giggled.

Hongjoong sat up, making you do the same. He laid down on his side of the bed, patting your pillow. You laughed as you laid down beside him.

"Come here." He whispered. You scooched closer, only for him to wrap an arm around your waist and lay his other under your head.

"There. That's better." He chuckled, now practically holding you to his body. Your chest tightened at this closeness.

"How has work been?" He asked, realising he's only been talking about himself the entire evening. Not once had he asked how have you been, even though he crashed your night at home.

"Busy. My company made me take on a new team and it's been grueling onboarding them." You groaned. Hongjoong chuckled, the hand of the arm around your waist opted to lightly brush the exposed skin of your hip with its thumb.

"But I think it's great your company believes in your ability to take on a new team and manage them, alongside your current team." He complimented.

"Thank you." You said.

"There's nothing to thank me for. You're an amazing leader with great work ethic, I've always told you that." He smiled.

"I thought you were just saying it to hype me up." You rolled your eyes, flicking his chest lightly. Of course you didn't do it hard enough to hurt him.

"You're so cute." He laughed and pulled you in to kiss the top of your head. You were both just silent, you were too lost in your head.

"Hongjoong, I-" You looked up to see his sleeping face. You melted slightly, reaching out to hold his cheek gently. Even in his sleep, he instinctively, leaned into your touch.

It took everything in you to carefully remove yourself from him. You tucked his outstretched arm next to him, pulling the blanket up so that it covered him properly. You stared at his sleeping face for a while, lightly patting his side through the blanket. Hongjoong meant so much to you. But what was he to you?

-

17th October, Tuesday, 4:49pm

It has been about 2 weeks since Hongjoong was at your place. When you woke up the next morning, he was gone. All that was left was a note on the counter in his handwriting.

'Thanks for letting me crash and feeding me so last minute, aein. Have a great day and weekend.

Also, there's iced coffee in the fridge and a bagel sandwich in the paper bag next to the toaster. Heat it up before you eat it!

- Hongjoongie'

Hongjoong was a terrible cook. But he still always tried to make sure you were fed. You were both workaholics so you took it upon yourselves to always remind the other to eat.

According to his one social media post, it seemed like he took your advice, going to the countryside for a few days to get away from the studio. Of course, you knew that he probably still brought equipment there to work but now there was a change in scenary.

"Oh, you're back." Seonghwa walked in after having seen the lights to his best friend's studio on. He had an iced tea on hand, not liking the bitterness of coffee.

"Mhmm." Hongjoong hummed, resting his head on his hand as he looked at the screen before him.

"So..." Seonghwa started.

"What?" Hongjoong stopped, turning to see the taller male who was now seated on the couch. He stood up and went to the mini fridge, grabbing a can of cold coffee to drink.

"What was with the sudden vacation? You don't usually take sch last minute studio leave." Seonghwa asked with suspicion.

"Just needed a breather. Wanted the outdoors. Looking for inspiration." Hongjoong shrugged.

"And did it help?" To which Hongjoong nodded to but then shrugged again, it was iffy. He didn't know for sure if it helped him write new music but it definitely helped him clear his head and forget about the stressors of work for a bit. Just like you said, it helped him focus solely on the music.

"I definitely feel more clarity in my thinking. Overall, it was a good suggestion for me to go." Hongjoong said without thinking. But Seonghwa raised an eyebrow at that.

"Suggestion? Someone suggested for you to go?" He clarified. Hongjoong cleared his throat, not expecting his best friend to pick that up.

"Yeah." He was brief in his answer as he sat back down in his chair and pulled himself back to his desk.

"(y/n) adviced you to go, didn't she?" From the way the shorter male stiffened slightly, Seonghwa knew he hit the nail on the head.

"We're still friends, Hwa. She tried to help me get out of a music rut, that's all." Hongjoong was unnecessarily defensive, especially when Seonghwa hadn't said anything.

"So you went to meet her to seek comfort from her. Just like how she does with you." Seonghwa spoke slowly, hoping Hongjoong would realise how that sounds. But he didn't get what the taller was getting at, nodding in agreement.

"Friends comfort friends." Hongjoong shrugged.

"Right, cause you two are just... normal, everyday friends." Seonghwa scoffed. Hongjoong frowned.

"I need to work. I'll see you at dinner later." He put his headphones on, shutting Seonghwa out. With a sigh, Seonghwa stood up and grabbed his drink before walking out of the studio.

Once the door closed, Hongjoong sighed, plopping his head down onto the desk. He groaned as he sat up, grabbing his phone.

"CHEERS!"

He straightened up when he saw your social media story on his personal, private account. You were out with your friends, Mingi, Wooyoung and San last night. Your posts were a mix of reposts from your friends and your own.

"Wooo!" You had a slightly shaky video with Mingi's arm around your shoulders, holding you to him. He was excitedly jumping up and down, making you jump with him.

"You're making me spill my drink!" You squealed, which only made the mischevious Mingi do it more.

"Ah, you're so cute." Mingi chuckled at your outraged reaction, pressing his forehead against your temple with a smile.

"Hug me!" The next was a video Mingi posted of San, obviously drunk, reaching out for you to hug him. At first, you shook your head, which only made San more whiny.

"Hug me~!" He glued himself to your waist like an attached child to his mother.

"I'd rather let him hug me than a random stranger. Again." You shook your head, taking a sip of your drink as you patted San's back.

"This girl. She always doesn't want to go out with us but when we make her, she has such a good time. Doesn't she?" Wooyoung appeared, giggly and also drunk. He held your chin to make you face him, a teasing smile on his face. You rolled your eyes and slapped his hands away.

"Yah-" Your shouts of protests were cut off as the video cut off and went to the next story. It was a report from a video that Wooyoung had taken in selfie mode.

"She's mine, okay?!" Wooyoung pulled you in, pressing his cheek against yours, squishing your faces together.

"You're mine!" He then proceeded to give you a loud kiss on the cheek.

Hongjoong had to turn his phone off after that. Mingi, Wooyoung and San were your friends a lot longer than he was. But he always felt out of place with them.

Mingi was always flirty with you and Wooyoung was always physically touchy with you. San as well but Wooyoung was more.

Out of respect for your longer friendship, he never mentioned anything to you. He was worried it might upset you or make him seem untrusting and/or insecure. And you never liked clubbing but the trio always convinced you to go with them.

Hongjoong brought it up once, telling you that you shouldn't feel pressured or forced to go. However, you assured him that you didn't feel forced at all and you trusted the 3 to keep you safe.

They weren't bad friends, they made you happy. They were there for you when you and Hongjoong broke up.

They were also the ones, along with Seonghwa, that disapproved of you and Hongjoong's 'arrangement' of continuing to seek comfort from one another.

-

26th October, Thursday, 8:16pm

"Joong...?"

The moment he heard your saddened voice, he sat up from his bed, pausing his music and putting his laptop aside.

"Yeah, aein? Are you alright?" He asked. It took a while for you to reply, he heard the shaky sigh that escaped you. It was barely audible but he still heard it.

"Ugh... Can I come over?" You seemed hesitant with your question.

"Of course." He replied almost instantly, contrary to your question, without any hesitation. Hongjoong had about 30 minutes to make his place 'presentable' to you. To be honest, he hadn't been home much, always camping at the studio or Seonghwa's place, which was much nearer to the studio.

*BEEP BEEP BEEP*

You still remembered Hongjoong's door passcode. It was his mother's birthday. You trudged in, kicking your shoes to the side as Hongjoong shuffled to you.

"Ugh..." You groaned, leaning against him with your forehead against his chest as he held you up.

"What's wrong, aein? Are you okay? Feeling sick?" Hongjoong asked.

"Work is shit, my parents are shit, life is shit." You complained, like a disgruntled teenager going through puberty. Hongjoong chuckled, guiding you to the couch. He tucked you under his arm.

"Alright, slowly. Tell me what happened?" He coaxed, his other hand coming to stroke your hair.

"Work is always shit, you know that. And my mum keeps trying to set me up on blind dates. The guy tonight was so... he was terrible." You groaned. Hongjoong went quiet. Whether it was on your own accord or not, he had no idea that you were back out in the dating scene.

"What guy ends a date so early? You called me at like 8pm." Hongjoong asked, looking at his watch.

"He didn't end the date. I told him I was leaving and just stood up... walked out of the restaurant..." You mumbled. That made Hongjoong burst out laughing.

"Aein! You walked out on the guy?"

"What? Would you have preferred I stay?" You frowned. Hongjoong stopped laughing at your words.

"Of course not." He hugged you tighter. To cheer you up, Hongjoong ordered you takeout. You weren't going to eat his possibly poisonous cooking. So he ordered rose tteokbokki with cheese.

"Why don't you go shower before the food comes? I've already turned on the heater." Hongjoong suggested. You nodded and pushed yourself to stand up.

"Way to tell me I smell." You scoffed with a playful smile before walking to the bathroom. You already knew your way around his house, just like how he knew his way around yours. But he still followed you, grabbing a clean towel for you while you took one of his hoodies from his closet.

"Thanks, Joong." You kissed his cheek and went into the bathroom. Hongjoong stood there, in the middle of the room, stunned.

"Calm down, Kim Hongjoong." He slapped his cheek before leaving his room. He closed the door behind him to give you some privacy before going back to the living room.

*DING DONG*

"Delivery." There was a muffled voice. Hongjoong went to answer, tipping the delivery guy.

"Thanks." He bowed his head and closed the door. As he got two plates and two sets of cutlery out, he paused for a moment. When was the last time he had someone over? It was probably you.

"Food's here?" Your voice sounded from the room. Hongjoong let out a sound of acknowledgement and you came out.

"Gosh, I'm starving." You said, drying your hair with the towel.

"Did you not eat at all, aein?" Hongjoong chuckled as you slid onto the bar stool, opposite him. You shook your head, accepting the cutlery and plate he handed to you.

"I left after eating two breadsticks, Joong. It was so bad, my parents were already tearing up my phone on the way here so I turned it off." You waved the blank out device, setting it on the table. You and Hongjoong dug into the food.

"You always know what I need, Joong." You giggled, physically melting and letting out sounds of happiness.

"Don't eat so fast, aein. No one is going to take it away for you." He chuckled, reaching out to pat your head with a soft smile on his face. You smiled back.

After eating the food and sharing a can of beer, Hongjoong made you some tea, knowing you always liked to have it after eating things that may cause you to feel bloated in the morning.

"Luckily I still have your full boxes of tea here." He said, handing you the mug.

"Thank you." You received the warm mug and took a sip, you were careful not to spill any on his bed.

"Were you working before I came?" You asked, nodding over to the laptop that had been abandoned at the end of the bed. The screen was still open, showing a chat between him and someone named 'Hyejin'. It was obviously a girl's name, making your stomach sink a little. But you looked away, ignoring it.

"Just some touch up work." He quickly picked it up and closed all the open windows. He tucked the device under his arm, going to charge it at the desk.

"So, who is Hyejin?" You couldn't help but ask in a low voice

"Just a friend I met. Seonghwa introduced us." Hongjoong replied. Internally, he was confused at your change in demeanour.

"Ah, I'm so glad I could take the day off tomorrow." You changed the subject, taking a long sip of tea before putting it on the nightstand beside you. Hongjoong laughed and got under the covers.

"Come." Just like at your house, Hongjoong waved you over. You moved in without hesitation, leaning against his touch. He tucked your head under his chin.

"It'll be okay, hmm? Don't be bothered by work and what your parents do." He rubbed your arm while hugging you.

"Thanks, Joong. I feel like you're the only one that will always believe in me." You closed your eyes.

"You should believe in yourself too, aein." He whispered.

When Hongjoong woke up, he was greeted by your sleeping face. You were calmly and safely tucked against his side, sleeping without a care in the world. Hongjoong smiled softly, stroking your head before getting up to close the curtains properly. You were always annoyed when even a little bit of sunlight came in to wake you.

*RINGGGGGG*

Hongjoong scrambled to get his phone, running out of the room so you wouldn't wake up.

"Hello?" He spoke softly even though he was a good distance away from the bedroom. He was still worried that you may get woken up by the slightest noise.

"Where are you? You're not coming into the studio today?"

"Oh, Hwa. No... I don't think I am." He said, leaning against the wall to look out the window.

"Why? You don't usually forget to cancel studio time unless it's an emergency. Please don't tell me you're going on another spontaneous holiday or something."

"I'm not... I'm just... busy..." Hongjoong scratched his head, not really sure on what to say. Seonghwa was silent on the other side.

"Oh my god. You have someone over, didn't you? Good on you, Hongjoong! Was she good?"

"Please don't speak about her in such a way..." He mumbled, annoyed that you were being mentioned in such a crude way, even if Seonghwa didn't intentionally mean it, not knowing that the person that as over was you.

"The person... It's (y/n)... isn't it...?"

"I-"

"Save it, Hongjoong. You don't have to explain it to me. Please just tell me you didn't do anything stupid that you will both regret."

"No, none of that. She was just having a hard time and I'm returning the favour. I comforted her like how she comforted me when I was struggling. That's all." Hongjoong explained.

-

6th November, Monday, 10pm

You stood outside of the club. It was closed for a private event but when you showed your card to the bouncer, he opened the velvet rope for you to go in.

"You okay?" A hand came up on your shoulder. You looked over to your plus 1, Jeong Yunho. He offered to come with you so you don't get lost and you didn't want your usual 3 friends to know you're here, they might actually tear the place down. But you were sure Yunho might tell Mingi at some point, they're best friends.

'HAPPY BIRTHDAY HONGJOONG!'

Was displayed everywhere. Yes, this celebration was to ring in Hongjoong's birthday at midnight. Hongjoong had sent you an invite and you asked Yunho to come with you for moral support.

You could have said no but deep down, you knew you couldn't. You didn't want Hongjoong to think there was something wrong.

"Sorry, where are the presents?" You asked someone that was dressed in a server outfit with a nametag.

"Follow me." He waved you over. Yunho walked behind you, guarding you against all the moving bodies. You were sure Seonghwa organised this party for him.

"Wow." Some presents looked huge and some weren't even wrapped, just presented into their luxury label paper bags. Compared to your small present, it seemed like it would get lost somewhere.

"Don't doubt it." Yunho whispered, knowing you. You sighed and placed the paper bag down.

"Shall we get some drinks?" He asked. You knew Yunho would take care of you if you had alcohol. He wasn't drinking, wanting to be sober to take care of you and because he was driving. You went to the bar to order yourself a cocktail.

Meanwhile, you hadn't noticed that Hongjoong was staring at you from the moment you walked in. His eyes narrowed in on Yunho, he wasn't part of your usual trio.

"Hongjoong! Are you enjoying yourself?" Seonghwa came up to him. Hongjoong nodded, making Seonghwa followed his gaze.

"You invited her?!" Seonghwa exclaimed.

"She's still a friend, Hwa." Hongjoong mumbled. Seonghwa face palmed, seeing the male by your side, he knew Hongjoong was going to be preoccupied the whole night.

"Please enjoy your own party." He sighed. Hongjoong took a sip of his drink, turning to his best friend.

"I am enjoying the party, Hwa. Thank you for organising it. I've spent the past two hours greeting people." Hongjoong cringed slightly. He appreciated Seonghwa's efforts but preferred a smaller, quieter, more intimate celebration. When Hongjoong saw you get up and try to head over, he straightened up.

"Go, go." He shooed Seonghwa away as you approached. Seonghwa rolled his eyes and walked away. But he did cross paths with you.

"Hi, Seonghwa." You gave a friendly smile. Seonghwa smiled softly, pulling you in for a hug.

"Hi, (y/n). How have you been?" He asked. Seonghwa didn't hate you or dislike you in anyway, like your own friends, he thought you and Hongjoong continuing as friends like this wasn't healthy.

"I've been good. What about you?" You blinked up at him.

"Great. You know the usual, taking care of Hongjoong." He chuckled. He could feel Hongjoong burning holes into the back of his head.

"I better let you go greet the birthday boy before I'm 6 feet under." Seonghwa patted your head before walking away. You tilted your head in confusion but went to Hongjoong.

"Aein, you made it." Hongjoong smiled softly as you came into view. You were beautiful, as you always were. You were dressed in a black dress with a slit going up the side of your thigh, the bodice hugged your curves nicely.

"Of course. Happy early birthday, Joong." You giggled, wrapping your arms around him. Hongjoong's scent always comforted you.

"Thank you." He closed his eyes, savouring the hug.

"You came with a friend?" Hongjoong asked when you both pulled away. You both wished the hug could last longer but it would just make the whole thing awkward.

"Yeah, just someone to make sure I get home safe in case I go overboard with the drinks." You said shyly, rubbing the back of your neck.

"Aein, I'll always make sure you're safe. You know I won't let you be in any sort of danger." Hongjoong frowned slightly. You didn't need Yunho to take care of you, he could do it, ma

"I know. I... I just want you to enjoy your party, don't worry about me." You said, squeezing his hand with a reassuring smile.

"Hongjoong! Happy soon birthday!" A girl appeared behind you. You blinked in confusion.

"Thanks, Hyejin." He replied. This was Hyejin, the girl that Seonghwa introduced to him. Now you felt out of place, like you were the one that wasn't supposed to be there.

"Enjoy your party." You wished. With another brief hug, you left him, going back to the bar where Yunho was waiting for you. You didn't want to leave his side, Hongjoong didn't want you to go too.

"Whenever you want to leave, just let me know. I'm here only for you." Yunho told you kindly. You nodded with a smile, taking a sip of your drink. Honestly, Yunho also disapproved of you coming but he'd rather come with you than let you come here alone. You insisted you were here to celebrate a friend's birthday, that's all.

"Alright everyone! Let's countdown to the birthday boy's birthday!" Seonghwa said in the mic, standing with everyone on the stage. You saw Hyejin standing beside him with a big smile.

"10... 9... 8... 7..." Everyone counted down with their drinks in hand. Hongjoong looked at you as you counted down with the crowd.

"1! Happy birthday Hongjoong!" Seonghwa yelled into the mic with everyone else raising their glass for the toast.

"Happy birthday Hongjoong!" Hyejin wrapped her arms around Hongjoong, giving him a peck. The crowd cheered at her action while Hongjoong's eyes widened at the action.

"Hyejin..." He was stunned.

His eyes searched for you frantically. You were still there but Hongjoong knew, your genuine smile was gone.

This was your fake, forced smile. Your mask of a smile.

He watched as Yunho leaned in to whisper something to you. You took the last sip of your drink and nodded, placing the empty glass on the counter. Yunho held your hand to help you off the bar stool and led you through the crowd to the exit of the club.

"(y/n)..." Hongjoong whispered.

"Enjoy the rest of the night everyone! Thanks again for coming to celebrate the birthday boy!" Seonghwa said to everyone before getting off the platform.

"Why would you do that?" Hongjoong frowned at Hyejin, who looked stunned at Hongjoong's reaction.

"I... I'm sorry, Hongjoong." She hung her head low.

"We're not dating, Hyejin. We just met! And you just do that in front of all my friends?" Hongjoong hissed. Seonghwa, who watched the exchange, sighed.

Yes, Hyejin shouldn't have done that. But he knew that Hongjoong was more bothered that you saw Hyejin kiss him.

-

15th December, Friday, 6:02pm

You sighed tiredly, getting up from your desk. There were too many year end wrap ups to do but you wanted to get them done before your Christmas leave started. While Yunho promised he didn't tell the other 3 about what happened at Hongjoong's party, it was suspicious when Wooyoung suddenly suggested a vacation.

It would be good. You wouldn't have to go to your stuffy family Christmas celebration, it was good to get away and you wouldn't be near Hongjoong.

But speaking of, you haven't contacted each other since the night of the party. Maybe it was for the better.

You were not dating, he was only a friend, so you shouldn't feel hurt or bitter. You told yourself that you should be happy for him, you knew he was a good partner, he would make Hyejin happy.

'I'm downstairs. - Yuyu'

'On the way. - (y/n)'

Yunho wanted to take you out to dinner tonight. You were clear in expressing that you were not ready for a relationship, no matter what your feelings were. But he assured you, it was just dinner.

"Yuyu." You called out to him. He straightened from his leaning postured against his car, smiling softly.

"Hi, (y/n). I hope you had a good day at work." He wrapped his arms around you to engulf you in a big bear hug, or what you would call a puppy hug, even rocking you from side to side. You giggled, putting your own arms around him.

"I told you to dress warmer." He tsked, taking the scarf off his neck and wrapping it around you.

"I'm fine." You waved him off. But he shook his head, opening the door to usher you into the warm car. Once you were seated, he closed the door and went to the driver's side.

You didn't notice the car that was parked a little behind Yunho. Hongjoong looked at the exchange between you and Yunho.

"Damn it." He slammed his fist against the steering wheel. He hadn't contacted you, he was scared.

He was scared of what you were going to tell him, he didn't want you to wish him the best. But he couldn't take it anymore so he wanted to speak to you physically.

But after witnessing that, if there was something between you and Yunho, he shouldn't be in the way. He should wish you both the best right?

-

25th December, Monday, 2:34pm

The boys decided to rent a cabin in a forest village of Kurokawa in Kumamoto, Japan. It was cold like Korea but the forest scenary was beautiful and there were Christmas lights set up everywhere, which was very pretty at night. You were seated next to the heater on the balcony, admiring the view.

*BEEP BEEP*

'Merry Christmas, aein. - Hongjoong'

You stared at the message for a while, chewing on your bottom lip as you decided if you wanted to reply. You knew if you wanted to let go of Hongjoong, you needed to stop contacting him.

'Merry Christmas, Hongjoong. - (y/n)'

When was the last time you called him 'Hongjoong' and not 'Joong'? Even when you broke up, you called him 'Joong'.

"Hey, beautiful. The boys wanna go snowboarding and-" San suddenly appeared. He seemed to have glanced at your phone because he frowned, taking it from your hands.

"Sannie." You tried to take your phone back.

"Come, Mingi wants to build a snowman with you." He said, tucking his phone into his pocket. You nodded, slipping your hand into his and letting him lead you out. Being with the 4, you knew you had to put Hongjoong at the back of your mind and enjoy yourself.

'How's Japa|'

*delete*

'You decided to travel for Christmas? That's gre|'

*delete*

Hongjoong groaned out, tossing his bed on the side. He really wished he was home where his home studio was and he could work. But he came to visit his parents for Christmas, only bringing his laptop.

"Hongjoong ah. Santa Claus can hear your sighs all the way in the North Pole." Mrs Kim clicked her tongue as she came in.

"Santa Claus isn't real, omma." Hongjoong scoffed, sitting up. Mrs Kim laughed and sat beside Hongjoong.

"Whatever it is you're going through, my dear son, you'll get through it. Sometimes, things just aren't to go our way, no matter how bad we want it to. But that doesn't mean it's the end. There's still so much to look forward to, you never know what life will throw at you." Mrs Kim smiled, rubbing Hongjoong's back.

-

7th January, Sunday, 10:13am

Hongjoong gulped as he stood before your front door. When you had suddenly texted him to meet, he grew nervous. You always called him and instead of asking to go over, you asked him over to yours.

*DING DONG*

Here goes nothing.

"Coming!" You replied, feeling your heart race as you approached your front door. You felt a lump in your throat, one that was too big to swallow. Seeing Hongjoong when you opened the door just made things worse. This was a bad idea.

"Hey, Hongjoong. Thanks for coming so early." You smiled, stepping aside for him to enter your house. There it was, you dropping the nickname and calling him 'Hongjoong' like an acquaintance.

"Hey. No worries, at all. I hope you had a good holiday." He returned the smile, reaching over to hug you briefly.

"I did. It was a nice getaway. What did you do?" You asked as you closed the door.

"Visited my parents for a bit, celebrated Christmas and New Years with extended family." He shrugged, removing his shoes and sitting on the couch. He was so stiff and awkward.

"Oh. That's nice. How are they?"

"Good." Hongjoong replied. You handed him a glass of iced coffee, holding your own tumbler in your hand before sitting down next to him.

You both felt a little deja vu, it was negative, making your stomachs sink and your hearts race. The last time you 'talked' like this, you were in Hongjoong's apartment, sitting down and ultimately ending the conversation in tears and with a break up. You gulped, trying to find the words.

"It's okay. Breathe." Hongjoong said, leaning forward and placing a comforting hand on your knee. It didn't help, you didn't want him to be nice, it only made things harder.

"I think I know what you want to talk about. That our friends were right, weren't they? We couldn't continue as friends like we thought." He spoke.

"Hongjoong... I..." Your bottom lip quivered.

"It's okay." He rubbed your back.

"I still care about you, Hongjoong. I really do... It's just... It's hard. I feel like my heart gets hopeful that we can go back to being something more but we can't." You looked at him, seeing tears in his eyes.

"At least I know I'm not the only one that feels that way. We tried to make it work but we still couldn't." He said.

"I'm sorry." You cried.

"Aein, don't be sorry. There's no one at fault. Unknowingly we've both been holding each other back that the other can't move on." He pulled you into a hug to soothe you.

"We both liked the comfort too much that it became too comfortable, similar to our relationship. Being just a phone call away from each other hurt more than it helped." You said softly. Hongjoong nodded in agreement, wiping his fallen tears.

"I don't want to lose you, Joong." You shook your head, subconsciously using the nickname. Hongjoong felt the same, he had already lost you as a lover, now he was going to lose you forever.

"I don't want to lose you too, aein."

"I shouldn't have confessed my feelings. If I didn't, we would have still been friends. We wouldn't be here." You said.

"No, please... Please don't say that like you regret it. Our time together was the best time of my life, I don't regret it at all. So please don't." He begged you, choking on a sob.

"And if you didn't confess, I would have. My only regret is not cherishing you more when I had the chance." He forced a small smile.

"It's not solely your fault, a relationship needs effort from both sides." You chuckled. You and Hongjoong just stared at each other, sharing a short moment of silence.

"Before I go, I just want to clarify. There's nothing between me and Hyejin. I didn't lie or hide anything from you." He blurted out.

"You don't have to explain it to me, Joong. It's fine. You're free to move on and love whoever you want. I know the girl you end up with is going to be the luckiest girl in the world." You smiled. Deep down, Hongjoong wished that girl was you. He already knew it was going to be a while until he can actually move on.

"Well, I can say the same for you. I wish you and Yunho the best." He said. You didn't correct him that you and Yunho weren't dating because was there a need to now?

"Thank you for everything, Joong. You gave me some of the best memories I've ever had." You pulled him in for a hug.

"Thank you for loving me, no matter how difficult I am, (y/n)." He cried softly and closed his eyes, squeezing you against him. You shook your head.

"Don't cry." You whispered, cupping his cheeks and wiping his tears with your thumbs. Hongjoong smiled tearfully, holding your hands in his. The both of you chuckled through your cries.

"Take care of yourself, hmm?" He said, rubbing the back of your hands. You nodded obediently.

"You too." You smiled softly.

You wanted to tell him, that if he ever needs you, he can always call you. But you said the same thing to him when you broke up, which led to the current predicament that you're both in so you kept quiet.

With that, Hongjoong reluctantly pulled his hands away from yours, walking down the hall with a hunched posture to hide his cries. Looking down at your hands, they suddenly felt cold as Hongjoong took his warmth away with him, as well as his heart.

#kpop #kpop scenarios #ateez #ateez scenarios #ateez oneshot #kpop oneshot #ateez x you #ateez hongjoong #hongjoong ateez #hongjoong #hongjoong scenarios #hongjoong oneshot #hongjoong x you #hongjoong x reader #hongjoong x y/n #kim hongjoong #kim hongjoong scenarios #kim hongjoong oneshot #hongjoong imagines #kim hongjoong imagines

[yeoandmoon]

i found the cure to growing older (and you're the only place that feels like home) ( hongjoong x fem!reader )

you're destined to follow park seonghwa. that's how it's been your whole life, and you'd prefer to keep it that way - thank you very much. it doesn't really come as a surprise to anyone when you follow him across the country to seoul to join the lucrative music industry, but perhaps the real surprise comes in the form of seonghwa's 5'8, pink-haired leader - kim hongjoong - and the late night studio visits that he's prone to.

smut, idolverse, producer!reader, friends with benefits, childhood bestie!seonghwa, a lot of music references (both joong and reader are little music snobs), implied seongjoong x reader (if u squint), studio sex, come eating, fingering, clit play, praise kink, bratty hongjoong, marking kink, implied dacryaphilia, wc is 3.1k

note: :) hiiiiiiiii (louder than anyone else) it has been a while! ngl here - this might be a little rusty! but i hope you all still enjoy it :) title is from i slept with someone in fall out boy, and all i got was this stupid song written about me by fall out boy! (ps. shoutout to the girl at blenz who watched me down a peppermint matcha and then go crazy writing the second part of this)

You owed a lot to Park Seonghwa.

You owed him far more than the cheap soju and street side corn dogs you bought him on nights out, despite listening to him whine that he had the idol money and could easily buy for both of you.

Seonghwa had gotten you the job at KQ Entertainment after a drunken night of you musing to him that no one in all of Seoul was hiring musicians, and you were about ready to pack up and move back with your grandma (who had been, in fact, right about moving to the big city) in the countryside. He helped you settle in the small studio full of instruments and sheet music, and he spent time with you around his busy schedules & hectic idol life.

(“It’s like you’re deliberately trying to keep me by your side, Hwa.”

“I did promise your grandmother I’d make sure Seoul didn’t chew you up and spit you back out, didn’t I?”)

He pushed you hard on quiet days, and would sit on the dingy little loveseat on the far side of your studio while he filled you in on random idol drama and rumors that filled the music show halls. Seonghwa would sometimes patiently watch you record instrumentals for songs, and go through demos the company would send you. He’d laugh at the jokes you’d crack about the bad demos, and sometimes you two would produce silly little raps & songs for the demos - seeing if you could somehow save the tone deaf beats & loud guitars that filled the GarageBand app.

Those were the days you longed for; the days you missed with your sweet best friend.

You understood the high school days once filled with old Fall Out Boy songs and pepero sticks were long gone, but you still tried to cling to the remnants that remained in your life.

Perhaps then, it would only make sense that Seonghwa would be the one to introduce you to Hongjoong - KQ’s Golden Boy and his closest friend within the idol world. In Seonghwa’s mind, this was a logical friendship. You two were ‘similar’ and ‘weirdly into music’, Seonghwa would tell you while on early morning coffee runs. He would grin at you when you raised an eyebrow at him.

“‘Weirdly into music?’ You’re the one with your face plastered onto subway cars, Mister Global Idol.”

(The small quips didn’t stop Seonghwa’s mission, though.

“I want you to meet someone.” He had told you, stalking into your cluttered studio one day.

A familiar figure followed Seonghwa through the door, his small stature dwarfed by your best friend. Kim Hongjoong was a colourful man. His hair was a vibrant blue, and his nails were painted a hot pink. He wore a backwards dad hat with the picture of a pastel coloured bass on it and a corny saying that you couldn’t quite catch before he looked up at you with bright eyes.

“So, you’re the one who produced the One Direction and Fix On remix?”)

After all, Seonghwa knew you better than anyone else. He knew all your deep secrets, and happy moments; he knew the things that made you tick and the things that brought you joy. So - maybe that was why you didn’t find yourself surprised when, none other than Seonghwa’s pick himself, Kim Hongjoong showed up outside your studio at 3 in the morning a mere few nights after being introduced; maybe that’s why it didn’t entirely baffle you when he placed a pile of cds ranging from newly released hip hop to eighties new wave, & everything in between, and asked your opinion on each and every cd in the pile. You soon found yourself arguing over the cultural shift you felt ‘Jolene’ brought, and cackling over Hongjoong’s Matty Healy impressions. 

Maybe that was why you weren’t surprised when he reached over and kissed you hard while a Shinee song played from your old MacBook and drowned out the soft moans that soon filled the small studio space.

Perhaps it was the late nights that followed the ‘Shinee Incident’; or, perhaps it was the fact you were both workaholics. You knew you should talk to Hongjoong outside of the oasis you felt you two had built yourselves within the rooms of KQ Entertainment, but sometimes you found the quietness of your late night rendezvous and stolen daytime kisses in the empty practice rooms was easier than the loud bustle of the Seoul streets and the distractions that came with Hongjoong leading a loud group of 20-something year old men.

You could also think of a hundred more reasons why you and Hongjoong kept meeting like this, but you were also content with just ignoring it and accepting whatever was going on until it was over.

[ from: hongjoong :) ] are you around??? [ from: hongjoong :) ] i can hear you playing with the piano. lol

Just like clockwork, you thought when your phone lit up. 

The bright little clock on your phone reads 03:19, and the piano you were working on was nearly finished. You were tired and craving your own bed; your ass hurt from the hard bench you had been sitting on for hours at that point. Despite that, you still found yourself reaching for your phone.

[ to: hongjoong :) ] yea im next door [ to: hongjoong :) ] :-)

Maybe you were craving something else too; maybe part of you was desperate for human affection, and you knew Hongjoong could give you that.

[ from: hongjoong :) ] :-)

(One could only take so much of the vibrator tucked away in their nightstand, of course.)

There was a shuffling in the hallway before the outline of Hongjoong appeared in the stained glass of the instrumental studio’s door. You watched the doorknob slowly turn before Hongjoong peeked his head into the room, a dark green beanie covering his faded pink hair. He smiled, and you swore his eyes always brightened at the sight of you.

“Hi.” You say, wincing at the exhaustion evident in your voice.

Hongjoong stepped into the studio, his eyes glancing around at the array of instruments surrounding you both before stopping back to where you sat on the piano stool.

“Hi.” He echos, stepping further into the room.

He’s wearing a tan hoodie that has little purple butterflies flying up the sleeve - and for a brief moment - you think it’s so sweet and so Hongjoong that you almost don’t want him to take it off. Then, he takes another step towards you and you see how his eyes darken as they take in the way your own hoodie is falling off your shoulder, exposing the lace black camisole and deep purple bra strap underneath. Something in his look stirs you, and you feel your cheeks begin to heat up as you look at the man in front of you.

“How’s the comeback going?” Your words crack, and you know your cheeks must be burning.

“It’s good,” Hongjoong says, his tone confident while he keeps his eyes on you, and pulls the hoodie over his head. A dark brown t-shirt is revealed, stretching across his chest and riding up enough to reveal to you the boxer band peeking from under his jeans. He throws the hoodie in the general direction of your computer chair and a smile plays at his lips, “Hwa and I are recording part of the rap tomorrow.”

He takes a step forward as he speaks, and you can hear the way his own words crack as he speaks so casually about your shared friend.

You know he needs this as much as you do - if the thick bulge in his jeans says anything about Hongjoong’s current state of mind.

You force yourself to pull away from blatantly checking him out and look up at him, “Did you happen to get that song I sent you?”

Hongjoong takes another step forward. “The Counting Crows one?”

“‘A Long December,’” you move to get up from the piano bench.

Hongjoong is suddenly on you with a sense of urgency, and the small talk portion of your evening is abruptly finished. “Don’t get up,” he tells you, pushing you back onto the bench. 

You see then how affected he really is; his pupils half blown, and his cheeks beginning to match the peach in his hair. “Cute.” The compliment falls from your lips before you can stop yourself, and your hand comes up to cup his cheek.

It delights you the way Hongjoong’s cheek burn at the simple word, and he moves to his knees in front of you, “‘Want you to stay there for me, yeah?” One of his hands moves to rest against your hand on his cheek.

You swallow and nod, not taking your eyes off the man who had managed to pry your legs apart, and was getting comfortable on the floor between them. You’re suddenly aware of your body’s reaction to Hongjoong - how sticky your panties were becoming & how heated your body was beginning to get.

Despite how common this occurrence was becoming, you never seemed to get used to how overwhelming his presence was; how much Hongjoong overtook your senses in every way possible. His hands moved to your waist, and he glances at you again before moving to the waistband of your leggings. His fingers gently slip under the waistband, and he nods to you - a request to move forward.

His fingertips are cool against your skin. They feel nice, you think as you nod to him.

Like most things with Hongjoong, he begins to move with urgency after he receives your consent. He leans up to pull you into a heated kiss as he tugs at your leggings and panties, urging you to shimmy out of them so he can get his hands on your thick thighs and the soaked core that’s between them.

Once exposed to him, one of his hands is immediately between your legs - his thumb pressing into your clit while two of his fingers gently run through your folds, gathering the wetness that lays there and sending your brain into a frenzy of Kim Hongjoong. 

You moan into the kiss, and your hands move up to tangle in his hair and pull him closer to you in an attempt to deepen the kiss. He smiles into it, and you just know that if you weren’t too busy kissing the smile away, it would be that impish, cocky smirk he gets every time he succeeds and wins; it’s the same smile he holds every time Ateez wins a music show, and it's the same smile he holds every time he makes you cum. One of his fingers gently breaches your sopping entrance, and you let out another moan against his lips.

“That feel good, love?” Hongjoong laughs against your lips before stealing another kiss.

Before you have a chance to answer, Hongjoong knocks your legs further apart and presses his thumb harder into your clit. His finger pushes into you and all you can do is swear, “Fuck! Hongjoong!”

Hongjoong releases another breathy laugh from his spot below you before pressing kisses down your neck. You feel his other hand begin to crawl up your tummy from its spot on your waist before stopping just as his fingertips hit the wire of your bra - it rests on your soft skin, and he hums against your skin before softly biting down. The sudden sting makes you gasp and your hand in his hair tightens on the strands you were holding, making Hongjoong hiss against you.

“Take it off.” He tells you, his hand coming up over the bra and tugging at the top of the cup to free your tit. His voice is lined with a growl, and his hand on your thigh tightens.

You know there’s bruises forming under Hongjoong’s fingers - adding to the collection of bruises he’s already left along your neck, tummy and anywhere else Hongjoong could possibly mark you. The possibility of them excites you; fills you with a pleasure, and rush of arousal.

His fingers immediately pinch at your nipple and you bite back a particularly loud whine, your hips bucking up against Hongjoong’s fingers. You begin to peel the hoodie off, letting it fall to the floor in front of the piano, while Hongjoong wastes no time to move his hand from your chest and tug the camisole over your head. It quickly joins the hoodie on the floor, and you’re left in only a lacy black bralette for Hongjoong’s hungry eyes.

“Take your shirt off.” You say, locking eyes with him and reaching for the brown fabric, “I wanna see you too.”

The light blush returns to Hongjoong’s cheeks, and you feel a sense of accomplishment rush through your veins. He leans back onto his legs and looks up at you - in the low & warm LED pink lights of your studio, Hongjoong looks pretty. His eyes are dark, and his hair is tousled from your pulling & tugging on it.

“Okay, love,” Hongjoong replies, “just gotta clean up first.”

There’s a small smile playing at Hongjoong’s lips as he moves his hand from your core, and keeps his eyes on you as he brings his hand to his mouth. His eyes flutter shut as he begins to lick his fingers clean, and all you can do is watch in pure pleasure as he licks your juices off his hand. He lets out a small moan, and your eyes widen as another rush of arousal surges through your body.

You tighten your thighs and try - & fail - to conceal the whimper that falls from your lips, and Hongjoong tilts his head in faux confusion. He moves his hand from his mouth, “What’s the matter, sweetie? I just wanted to taste you.”

You’re utterly, and completely, speechless and all Hongjoong can do is giggle from his spot below you. 

He leans up to kiss you again, with his (now “clean”) hand coming up and cupping the back of your neck to pull you closer. You kiss him back and part of you revels in the faint taste of yourself on his tongue. Your hands move to the bottom hem of his shirt, and you break the kiss to pull Hongjoong’s shirt over his head.

It’s added to the ever-growing pile of clothes that are gathering at the bottom of the piano.

“You’re gorgeous.” You say, and you can’t help as your eyes rake down Hongjoong’s newly exposed body and the piercing that glints in the light on his left nipple.

Hongjoong’s eyes flash, and his other hand tightens on your thigh again, “Do ya’ think flattery will get you somewhere, sweetie?”

You play along with Hongjoong’s games. You pretend you don’t see the way he gets flustered & bothered when you compliment him, and he pretends not to notice that you like making him feel like that. You couldn’t deny the absolute rush it gave you every time he whined your name at the smallest praise.

You take a deep breath before nodding, “Will you let me cum?” You ask, giving him a pout.

Hongjoong’s cocky smirk is back, and your hands grip the edge of the bench. They’ve become so tight against the wood that you’re sure your knuckles are white; it was your turn to become flustered. Your mind was beginning to fray at the edges with every second that passes of Hongjoong’s intense stare and the way his hands slowly began to move up your thighs again. 

He pushes your thighs apart again, and promptly takes his spot back between your legs. He gives you a cheeky smile while you gasp at the cold air against your soaking core; before he pushes you back against the piano and pushes his two fingers back into your hole, chuckling when you let out a cry of his name. The piano keys sound out throughout the room, but Hongjoong ignores it as he drives his fingers harder into you.

If Hongjoong wasn’t so determined to fuck you stupid, perhaps you’d think he was trying to see what notes he could produce every time your back bounces against the keys. Perhaps, just maybe - you’d even suggest turning the microphone on, and recording the notes and moans that’d be produced.

You open your mouth to say something - possibly to beg, possibly to cry for Hongjoong but all thoughts are abandoned when Hongjoong leans forward and takes your clit in his mouth. He sucks on the little nub and you swear your brain goes blank.

You cry out in pleasure, and your hands go down to find purchase in Hongjoong’s hair. He groans against you, one of his hands coming up to hold you waist as you gently rock your hips up against his face.

“Joong…” You plea, “Hongjoong, I’m so close. You feel so good, Joong.”

He adds another finger into you, heightening your pleasure and beginning to scissor them to stretch you out as you gasp, “You’re gonna take my cock after this, right sweetie?”

You nod. It’s all you can really bring yourself to do - although you know you’d do anything for Hongjoong at this moment. You’d probably allow Seonghwa to see you like this, if he wanted you to.

Hell, you’d allow Seonghwa to join in, if Hongjoong asked you too right now. 

“Hongjoong, please…”

Hongjoong kisses your cheek, and you flutter your eyes open to find him level with you, “Go on, love. Let it out for me.”

The simple words were all it took for you to come. The overwhelming euphoria of Kim Hongjoong took over your psyche, and you cried his name as you gripped his arms. 

You ride out your orgasm while you chant Hongjoong’s name, and he kisses your cheek & jaw. He now stands over you, his hand gently running through your hair as you slowly recover, resting your head on his tummy and reveling in the feeling of his hand in your hair.

It takes a moment to look up at Hongjoong. You’re still panting, and you feel tears on your cheeks begin to settle. He smiles sweetly at you, before leaning down to kiss you - softer than any other point during the night.

“Do you want to keep going?” Hongjoong asks, his hand coming to rest on the back of your neck.

You begin to pull away as your hands come up to undo his belt, “I gotta keep my word, don’t I?” You bite your lip to stop the smile beginning to grow on your face.

#ateez imagines #ateez smut #ateez x reader #kim hongjoong smut #kim hongjoong imagines #ateez scenarios #b.

[hongjoongsart]

Midnight | Kim Hongjoong

🌙 IMPORTANT: Re-upload from my deleted account (hongjoongspoetry).

🌙 Summary: The lovely date with Hongjoong comes to an end.

🌙 Pairing(s): Hongjoong x f!reader

🌙 Genres/Tropes: fluff, slice of life

🌙 Warnings/Tags: No use of (Y/N)

🌙 Wordcount: 0.2K

🌙 Author's note: Here's a lil Hongjoong drabble while I work on my San soulmate oneshot! If everything goes as planned I'll have it posted sometime this week.

AO3 Click on me!

This is all fiction and not meant to represent Hongjoong in any way or form.

The clock inched closer to midnight and it was time they headed home. Hongjoong refused to let her take the tram alone so they sat in the vacant bus, knees touching, and basked in each other’s presence. His black coat draped over her shoulders despite her protests of not being cold. The roses rested on her lap, some already opening to the world. Sleep hung on her eyelids and she was in a constant battle to keep them from closing, his warm coat that smelled so good didn’t help either. Any minute now and they’d stop by her neighborhood. 

“Thank you for tonight, Hongjoong. I had fun.”

“I’m happy we got do to this.” 

“Me too.”

They stopped before her entranceway, the bright light of the wall scone illuminated their figures. She moved to return his coat but was told not to.

“Keep it. You can bring it next time.”

“Next time?”

“Uh–” Hongjoong blushed, “I mean if you want to.”

She inched closer and felt the warmth radiating off his body. She rose on her tiptoes to better press her lips against his cheek, rewarding him with a soft peck. His cheeks flamed bright red and eyes bulged in shock.

“Get home safely,” she said and ran inside.

© HONGJOONGSART 2023 - All rights reserved. Copying, editing, reposting or translating my work is not allowed.

#[🐿️] HONGJOONGSART #kim hongjoong #kim hongjoong x reader #kim hongjoong fanfic #kim hongjoong fluff #kim hongjoong imagines #kim hongjoong scenarios #ateez #ateez x reader #ateez fanfic #ateez fluff #ateez imagines #ateez scenarios #fluff #cute #kpop #kpop x reader #kpop writers #writers on tumblr #ao3 fanfic

[gummygowon]

how ateez sleeps/wakes up next to you

word count: 1.2k

genre: straight fluff, boyfriend!ateez x reader

warnings: none

author's note: this was purely self indulgent lmfao but anyways enjoy something fluffy during this kinktober

author's note (11/13): guys this is so embarrassing i have made a grave mistake on yunho's part BUT ITS FIXED IF YOU SAW WHAT I ORIGINALLY PUT NO YOU DIDN'T

park seonghwa

i can imagine him holding you so carefully while you guys slept

like he was afraid you were going to break in his arms

probably loves to smell your hair before sleeping (ik this sounds like so freaky but hear me out)

your shampoo brings him comfort, he associates it with home

now when it's the morning he is usually up an hour before you getting ready for the day and making breakfast for you

but on the days you're up before him, he is holding you close

you literally have to poke his cheek to get him awake but to no success, he just squeezes you tighter making it practically impossible

seonghwa then mumbles something about wanting five minutes more as he buries his face into your shoulder

and how can you say no to the park seonghwa?

kim hongjoong

ngl i feel like sleeping with hongjoong can be so mf chaotic

like he starts out cuddling you real close and cute

but then once he's asleep he is pushing you to the side because he is sleeping as if he is on the only one on the bed

i'm talking about spreading his legs and arms, maybe even sideways when he is asleep who knows

literally the opposite of seonghwa

since he is working half of the night, it means he is asleep for most of the morning/afternoon

trying to get him up before twelve in the afternoon after he was working was literally impossible

so whenever you woke up, hongjoong was still sleeping soundly with an arm thrown over you

too comfortable in his embrace, you close your eyes for a few more minutes and pull the covers closer to you

jeong yunho

I KNOW FOR A FACT YUNHO SLEEPS WITH HIS CHIN ON HIS LOVER'S HEAD

like you can't convince me that he does not

one of his hands would probably clutch the back of your head very loosely or be snaked around your back

it doesn't matter if you twist or turn in your sleep because you will end up with yunho's head on top of yours

probably clings onto you like your his teddy bear

i mean you are basically

sleeping with him is literally so peaceful and comforting omg

waking up next to him is on the very top of your favorite things to do with yunho

you just love waking up to his messy bed hair and his morning blush on his puffy cheeks

ugh kissing his cheeks until he wakes up lksjdfsdf

yun would also love burying his face into the crook of your neck whenever you wanna get out of bed

kang yeosang

i feel like yeosang isn't the biggest fan of physical touch but he always wants to let you know that he's there for you even while you're sleeping

so he comprises by draping your arm somewhere over your body

or maybe he likes to loosely hold your hand as he sleeps but when he turns over that's when he drapes your arm over him

i can also see you compromising by grabbing yeosang's arm like a teddy bear and using his shoulder as a place to rest your chin

probably the most comfortable spot for to sleep on ngl

i can perfectly imagine waking up next to yeosang with his hair scattered in different places as he groggily wakes up and you're just laughing at how cute he looks with his hair like that

yeo is all like why are you laughing at me >:( and you're just like you're just so cute :D

i would also like to add you guys take turns waking each other up by kissing each other's hands

choi san

we all know this man likes to cuddle with whoever he is sleeping with

i can picture him, grabbing you close and always double checking if you're comfortable and urging you to get comfy before you go to bed

sleeping with him is just so warm and loving, i don't know how to describe it

it feels like your worries slip out of your mind whenever you nap with him

waking up however is a different story

waking up your cuddly boy is literally so fucking difficult AND FOR NO REASON

whenever you attempt to wake up san or pull him out of bed, he just pulls you back into bed

literally bear hugs you so tight you can't even get out of bed yourself

mumbles something about five more minutes as your cheek is smashed against his chest

depending on what you were supposed to do that day, you just like san pull back to sleep and you do

you fall asleep on his chest after listening to the calming and steady beat of his breathing

whatever you had planned for the day was going to be pushed back at least two hours

song mingi

for mingi i feel like he loves to be little spoon more than big spoon

can perfectly imagine you cuddling from behind, your hands wrapped around his front with his back on your chest

the warmth you bring to him is something that can easily put him to sleep

which is why he prefers you to hold him especially when he was hard days

sleeping for the both you guys is something so peaceful and calming

naps >>>> going out on actual dates

however, mingi has a problem of spreading tf out when he sleeps sometimes so you can either end up on the very corner of the bed about to fall off

or he is probably cuddling you so tightly

your face pressed up against his chest as he snores softly on the top of your head

also probably would not wake tf no matter how hard you try

like san, he pulls you into bed and shushes you by smashing your face into his chest

jung wooyoung

i can assure you that sleeping with wooyoung can literally be war for you

mf PUSHES YOU OFF THE BED WITHOUT REALIZING SOMETIMES

fr sleeps like a starfish

also steals all of the blanket somehow if he isn't pushing you off the bed

however you manage to work around wooyoung's shitty sleeping habits and use his body for warmth instead of the blanket he somehow all took

maybe this is why he takes all the blanket, so he could get you to cuddle him without asking (sneaky bastard)

waking up next to him can be a little more peaceful

is always waking you up because he got a good nights rest while you were dreading waking up at that moment

likes to either tug at your warm to wake you up or start kissing your face like a manic

or if he's feeling a little too playful and start kissing anywhere

forcing you to wake up giggling

choi jongho

jongho is another secret little spoon

it just makes him feel so warm, loved, and comfortable

no matter where you were if you were holding him he would end up asleep

throwback to when he came back after kcon la and literally crashed in your arms as you guys were watching a movie at your apartment

the lack of sleep because of the time change and uncomfortable plane ride finally got to him

also very clingy in the mornings

you wake up to him hugging your arm, his face pressed against right below your shoulder

his cheeks have a tiny blush as his mouth slightly hanging open

attempting to wake him up is literally impossible

baby get his best sleep when he's with you so why would he ever wake up

#ateez oneshots #ateez reactions #ateez fluff imagine #ateez fluff oneshot #ateez fluff imagines #ateez fluff #kim hongjoong #park seonghwa #jeong yunho #kang yeosang #choi san #jung wooyoung #choi jongho #hongjoong imagines #kim hongjoong imagines #hongjoong fluf #kim hongjoong fluff #seonghwa fluff #seonghwa oneshots #seonghwa x reader #seonghwa fluff oneshots #yunho imagines #yunho drabbles #yunho smut #yunho x reader #yeosang scenarios #yeosang fluff #yeosang fluff oneshots #san fluff #choi san x reader

[cybrsan]

hi new follower here! I've read your stuff on AO3 but I didn't know that you post here too. for the prompt list, I'd like to request # 93 and # 123 for smut with whiny, petty hongjoong. he doesn't have to be a sub but he's very hornknee and touch-starved 👀 I'd love to see your take on it. thanks if you write this 🫶

Omg, I'm so touched! Thank you so much for supporting me both here and on AO3. Also, I absolutely loved writing this request—needy Hongjoong is everything to me. I did mix in a little bit of angst for the scenario to play out but I hope you don't mind and enjoy it anyway!

Prompts:  93. “Say you want me, and I’m yours.” + 123. “Fuck you.” “When?” Pairing: Hongjoong x F!Reader Genre: Angst, Fluff, Smut Word Count: 1.1k Tags/warnings: Miscommunication, clothed sex, sex as a coping mechanism (kinda)

Requests are currently closed, but my masterlist can be found here.

When you finally feel Hongjoong slip into bed next to you, it must be in the early hours of the morning, considering that you had gone to sleep a little past midnight. You stayed up as long as you could, waiting for him to get back from the studio so that you could catch up on the new episodes of the drama the two of you have been watching together. It’s something you don’t have time to do often due to his hectic schedule, and he had promised to come home early and make it a date.

You always try to be understanding of his schedule, understanding that the time you do have with him is borrowed and can be quickly taken away if something work-related comes up. You would never insist that he put you first, knowing just how passionate he is about music. Seeing the way his eyes light up when he talks about it or the way he seems to radiate pure, unbridled joy when he is on stage is a gift in and of itself. You love his love for it all. 

But, really, is a text too much to ask for? Or a phone call to let you know he’ll be late, that something has come up? You almost say something, but then he slips his arm around your waist and pulls you close. You settle into his embrace, sighing contentedly. You may be upset with him, but you can discuss it in the morning.

You almost fall back asleep when you feel Hongjoong’s lips on your shoulder, and his fingers find their way under your shirt, ghosting over your stomach. He slots his hips against yours, and you can feel his half-hard cock pressing against you.

“You’ve got to be kidding me,” you say, looking over your shoulder at him in disbelief. 

“I’m sorry, baby,” Hongjoong says, kissing you gently. “I tried to make it home early, but I got carried away.”

“And now you want to wake me up so that you can get off?”

“Please, I need you. I’ll make it up to you, promise.”

You groan and shut your eyes, turning away from him. “Fuck you, Hongjoong.”

“When?” 

You almost laugh but stop yourself, not wanting to give up the facade of your annoyance. “Take care of yourself. I’m going back to bed.”

“Baby,” he whines, rocking his hips against you. “Don’t do this to me.” 

“Take care of yourself,” you repeat, except this time, you thrust yourself back against him. 

Hongjoong groans and, spurred on by your words, begins to rut against you. He buries his face in your hair as his hands move over your body, exploring every inch of you that he can reach. He tugs you closer by the hip, allowing you to feel the hard outline of his cock against your ass with every movement. Even separated by your clothes, you can feel the heat of him, his need palpable even like this. 

He gradually increases his tempo, his movements becoming more urgent, more desperate. He pants against your neck, hot breath raising goosebumps on your skin. Having him use you to get himself off like this feels so erotic, and you’re surprised by how turned on it’s making you when you haven’t even been touched. Without even realizing, you have begun to move back against him, meeting his every thrust. As if Hongjoong can sense your need, he moves his hand from your hip and dips his fingers below the waistband of your panties. 

“Want you to come with me,” he moans, breathless.   

He circles around your clit, teasing it gently as he continues to move against you. You can feel him trembling with effort, trying to prolong his own orgasm until you get close to the edge. His fingers move against you expertly, instantly finding the spot inside of you that has you seeing stars. You moan, white-knuckling the bedsheets as pleasure tears through you.   

He moves faster now, thrusting against you in time with his fingers as he takes you closer and closer to the brink. He whispers sweet nothings in your ear, telling you how beautiful you are, how good you are for him, how lucky he is to have someone like you. His words and his touch prove too much for you, heat coiling in your gut, and you come around his fingers with a gasp.  

He groans as he soon follows you, his entire body shuddering against yours as he comes. He slows to a stop, holding you close against his chest as your breathing returns to normal. He continues to whisper words of love into your ear, pressing kisses into your skin to punctuate each sentence. 

Eventually, he murmurs a soft apology. “I really am sorry for not showing up. I should have been more considerate.”

You turn to face him, kissing him sweetly. “Joong, it’s alright. I just wish you would have let me know so I wasn’t waiting around all night. It didn’t feel great.”

“I know, baby, I’m so sorry.” He frowns, looking so guilty and upset that you almost feel the urge to comfort him even though you know he’s the one in the wrong. “Do you feel used?” 

His question takes you off guard, and you can’t control the shock on your face. “What? Why would you ask me that?” 

“I don’t know…” he lets his sentence trail off, trying to find a way to articulate his thoughts. “I missed our date and then came home and acted so selfishly, wanting you even when you weren’t in the mood. I don’t want you to think that all I care about is your body or that I don’t value your time because that couldn’t be any further from the truth.” 

“Hey,” you coo, wrapping your arms around his waist. “If I didn’t want it, I wouldn’t have initiated. You have never made me do anything against my will. I love you, Joong. You should know by now that all you ever have to do is say you want me, and I’m yours. Even if it’s early in the morning, and I’m grumpy and half-asleep.” 

He beams at you, moving forward to pepper your face in kisses. “I love you so much. How did I get so lucky?” 

You laugh and jokingly push him away, trying to escape his overzealous show of affection. “I love you too. Now hurry up and change so we can cuddle and go to sleep.”  

He quickly obliges, and after changing into a fresh pair of boxers, he crawls back into bed and pulls you close. You practically melt into his embrace, an overwhelming sense of comfort washing over you. For the second time tonight, Hongjoong buries his head in your hair, taking in the scent of you as his breathing slowly evens out. It doesn’t take long for the both of you to drift off into a peaceful slumber, content in each other’s embrace.

#kim hongjoong x reader #hongjoong x reader #kim hongjoong smut #hongjoong smut #hongjoong fluff #hongjoong angst #hongjoong imagines #kim hongjoong imagines #ateez x reader #ateez imagines #ateez smut #ateez fluff #100 followers #my fic #ateez fic #ateez requests #hongjoong drabbles #ateez drabbles #michi.req #necessiteez

[sorryimananti-romantic]

Eternal Sunshine

hongjoong x reader

eternal sunshine of the spotless mind au except i tweaked... a lot

genre and warnings: fluff, angst, suggestive, cursing, violence warning

word count: 23k

synopsis: you and hongjoong meet on the train and instantly connect, going from friends to more. however, you're both plagued by a past that you do not remember, and when you both start to dig into it, you realise that your pasts may be connected and the situation might be graver than you thought.

Your plan to sleep the entire train ride that was about to be 6 hours, travelling from one corner of Wonderland to the other, was failing miserably.

Firstly, it was daytime. Your sleep schedule might be staying up late at night and sleeping for most part of the day but for some reason, it was a hit and miss whenever you were travelling. That meant that if you dozed off the second a journey would start, you would stay asleep for almost the whole part of it. But if you didn’t fall asleep as soon as it started, you would have trouble trying to sleep. And trouble looked like resting your head against the window or any closest surface with eyes shut but brain wide awake.

You could hear the kid whining about not bringing enough snacks for the journey all the way from the end of the cabin. You were sure he wasn’t very loud but you still wanted to go and say something to shut him up. You could also hear the old couple in the back talk about their kids. You didn’t mean to eavesdrop, but they weren’t being quiet so it wasn’t entirely your fault. You could also hear the constant thrum of the train whooshing on its track, and if you opened your eyes and looked outside, you would see the buildings as a blur. 

The only good part about this whole journey was that most of the seats were empty which meant you had quite some space for yourself. Your front seats were empty so you were resting your feet on them. Your arms were folded and your overcoat was keeping you warm. Your pastel pink muffler was bundled in your lap. The coffee you had brought from home had long gone cold in the tumbler. You sighed to yourself- not the best start to the day, but once you would reach Sector 1, you might feel better. 

You had no idea how long it had passed when you were woken by a tap to your shoulder- woken from your almost-falling-asleep stage. It made you jerk before you blinked to see who dared disturb.

“I’m sorry, is this yours?” the man asked, your huge black headphones with cat paws on its ears in his hand. 

“Ah, must have rolled off from my… bag,” you grimaced at the sight of your tote bag upside down on the floor, a few things having rolled out that the man was already placing on the table with a faint smile. “Sorry for the trouble.”

“It’s alright. I was dozing myself there-” he pointed at the seats next to you at the other corner, “when something bumped my feet.”

“Gosh, I’m a mess,” you finished placing everything in your bag, zipping the bag as you pointedly looked at the man who laughed. You took a second to scan him- he had quite memorable features and appearance. Half bleached hair, glasses that were probably an accessory, pointed features but warmth radiating from his rather cute smile. “Sorry to wake you up, Cruella.”

“I get that a lot,” he grinned, extending his hand. “I’m Hongjoong.”

“Y/n,” you shook his hand, and he pointed to the seat in front of you and you nodded to tell him he was welcome to sit and chat. “Where are you travelling to?”

“Sector 1. You?”

“Same place. You live there?”

“Yep. I was staying a few months at my friend's house in Sector 8, for work.”

“That’s crazy because same,” you laughed. “Glad to be going back home though.”

“Yep,” he nodded. “You look familiar for some reason. Might have come across you either there or back home.”

“You look familiar too, for some strange reason, but I’m sure I would have remembered you,” you pointed at his hair. “I kind of love it.”

“Ah, really?” He touched his hair, laughing nervously and you thought it was cute. “I tend to try different things.”

“I’ve had the same hair since I was born,” you rolled your eyes. “I might go ahead and do something funky one of these days too. And then I would call you my muse.”

“That’d be cool,” he grinned. “So what do you do for work?”

You offered him a chocolate from your bag, taking one for yourself and looking outside- it was almost evening. The train would be taking a break at Sector 4 soon and you wanted to get something warm. “I’m a literary editor for a company. You?”

“Music producer,” he told you and you wowed at that. “It’s not as great as it sounds. When it’s a hobby, it’s all fun and games, but when it becomes work, it can give you a hard time.”

“I relate to that. I used to be a writer until it became too much and I stopped,” you said and he raised a brow but didn’t probe further. He could tell there was a story behind it. “It’s fun when you do something you like for work, even though sometimes it could give you a hard time.”

“That’s true. I noticed your headphones though, and I couldn’t help but wonder if you’re interested in music?”

You couldn’t tell why you could connect to Hongjoong instantly but there was just something about the way he talked that kept you engaged, listening to his every word and then answering more than you would have with any other random stranger. You weren’t one to talk to strangers in the first place- but something about him was so utterly genuine that you found yourself chatting with him for half an hour until you stopped at Sector 4 for an hour-long break. Hongjoong offered you to grab some tea with him and you couldn’t refuse.

“It’s freezing,” you wrapped your muffler around your face like a mummy, leaving only space for the eyes, making Hongjoong laugh- another thing about him that was endearing. He mirrored your action and like mummies, you two walked to the nearest shop to get something warm to hold and drink. 

As you sat next to each other on the stools looking out of the window and checking your phones, finally having unwrapped yourselves, you asked him if he was looking forward to finally being home. He passed you a tight-lipped smile, taking a sip before replying.

“I needed to be away from home. I know that for me my home is the most comfortable place in the world, but I don’t know. I somehow needed to get away from there.”

You nodded- you weren’t sure you could relate entirely but you could understand. “It’s like that with people too. Sometimes you want to run away from them even if they mean the whole world to you.”

Hongjoong looked at you. “I guess so. Have you ever had that point in life?”

“I don’t know,” you shrugged. “I tend to be the type of person who doesn’t let anyone mean ‘the whole world’ to me anyway.”

Hongjoong unexpectedly laughed at that, making you wonder what was so funny even though you joined. “You must be a hard nut to crack. You don’t give off that vibe.”

“Really? I need to strengthen my defences then- do I seem like an open book to you?” You asked, making him laugh and shake his head again.

“Not an open book but not someone I realised might not be who they seem to be,” he explained and you made an impressed face. “That means you’re doing fine.”

You forgot how you were going to retort when something caught your eye and you turned to look outside the window, realising it was-

“Snowing. It’s snowing!” You grinned, taking his hand and dragging him outside despite his protests, and you two were a laughing mess when you were finally under the snowflakes.

“Aren’t you the one who was just freezing to death moments ago!” Hongjoong laughed, not bothering to dust off the snowflakes anymore and finishing his coffee.

“I do like it when it snows though,” you grinned.

Hongjoong shook his head, taking your cup as well to throw it in the bin and when he came back, he scoffed at the sight of you- trying to hide under the tree to avoid snowflakes on your uncovered face. He stood beside you, watching the ground turn whiter with each passing second. When he looked at you again, there was a snowflake on your cheek and before he knew it, he was brushing it off with his thumb, earning a short but surprised gasp from you, which made him go someplace else entirely before he smiled casually.

“We should go inside.”

Once inside, you two resumed chatting about casual stuff, not trying to get personal, but at some point you fell asleep and Hongjoong watched you with a smile before resting his head on the window and falling asleep across from you. Before you knew it, you had reached Sector 1 and you both were gathering your things. 

“I hope to see you again somewhere around,” you said. “It’s a small town. We’ll probably run into each other sooner than we’d expect.”

“I don’t really go outside often, so let’s see,” Hongjoong pouted. “Are we not exchanging phone numbers?”

You smiled faintly at that, wanting to exchange contact information so bad but… there was a side to you he didn’t know about. “Tell you what- the next time we run into each other, we’ll share our numbers first. But for that,” you leaned in a little as if to whisper a secret. “You’ll have to come outside more often.”

Hongjoong shook his head in amusement. “If you catch me standing in the corner of a street looking like a lost kid, you should know it’s because I was waiting for you.”

“Oh, I have a feeling we’ll run into each other before we get to that point,” you winked, spotting your tall friend behind him and extending your hand to Hongjoong. “It was really nice to meet you, Kim Hongjoong. Until we meet again.”

“No wonder you’re a writer,” he scoffed. “Until we meet again… y/n.”

—----------------------------

“Yunho, if you ‘accidentally’ kick my leg one more time, I’m going to break all your toes-”

Yunho choked on his drink, laughing. “This is a small table, and I need space for my legs!”

“Well, you’re the one who brought me here!” You sighed. “Let me just-” You turned your legs against the wall, letting him have the rest of the space to himself. “We good?”

“We’re great,” he grinned mischievously. “Now can you stop whining about every minor inconvenience and tell me how the past six months were at Sector 8?”

You sighed, slumping down further as you sipped on the chocolate milkshake. “It was fine. I’m doing better at work. I just still feel like there’s a spark in me that’s missing. Maybe the creative soul in me has… died, you know?”

“You just need a muse,” he told you as if he had the right answer. “And if you look closer, you might find it right in front of your face-”

“A muse, huh?” Your mind went elsewhere, though, to a person that resembled a certain fictional character. “I haven’t written a book in two years. I’m glad I chose to be anonymous because I don’t think I could have handled the pressure from my fans if they knew who I really was.”

“Fans should know when to give their favourite writers time and space,” he said but you knew he felt sorry too. “I think you should just be glad you didn’t leave a project unfinished or left in the middle of writing a series.”

“Yeah, that’s a big relief,” you nodded enthusiastically, shivering at the prospect of having done any of the two. “I can even say I’m officially retired and have no regrets. Well, not exactly no regrets but at least I’ll be satisfied.”

“Totally, though I wish you could give us one final piece if you do wish to retire,” Yunho made puppy eyes and you glared at him but smiled. He was your best friend but also your biggest fan. 

“How’s your new roommate? What was his name again?”

“Seonghwa- he’s really good. Mingi and I are adjusting well with him,” he told you and went into the details about how Seonghwa was working in the music industry and had the kindest soul. “He’s also kinda hot so I think you should really come over sometimes because I can’t hear you whine about how lonely you are anymore-”

“Speak for yourself,” you scoffed. “One girl breaks your heart and you swear off relationships. It’s a wonder you didn’t kick me out of your circle.”

Yunho sighed deeply. “At least I don’t complain about being lonely, y/n.”

He was right- it was usually you, and since during the last six months you and Yunho only talked through text or calls, he heard it more. Life in Sector 8 wasn’t full of parties and all. It was just being holed up in your room, occasionally being dragged by one of your friends there to the outside world for lunch or dinner. Other than that, you focused on work. It was an opportunity you didn’t want to miss and if that meant being away from home for half a year, you didn’t care.

Especially when you were pretty sure you were going to go crazy.

As if Yunho knew exactly what was going on in your head, he asked, “You still have those daydreams?”

“They’ve turned into dreams,” you looked at him. “It feels like another life, Yunho. And I know I could write about it, but I don’t think I can.”

“You should stop being scared of what’s inside your head,” he said. “I don’t get what you’re so afraid of.”

“I don’t get it either,” you muttered.

On the way back home, you took your time, taking the longer route to your apartment, just wanting to roam around your hometown and soak in everything and see what had changed. No matter how much it changed, you realised, it would still feel like home every time. Safe, but you found yourself looking over your shoulder a few times. Warm, but you would suddenly feel chills. The weather was pleasant though and you were enjoying yourself, kind of glad it wasn’t snowing yet.

Your mind immediately went back to Hongjoong. You wondered where he was and if you were ever going to run into him again. You were pretty sure you would, but the reason why you didn’t take his phone number that day was something you needed time for.

Your daydreams- they were like flashes of an alternate life. In that life, you looked the same. You went to the same places, but you were with someone else- someone with hair the most pretty shade of blue. You didn’t remember what he looked like, nor did you recall how he sounded. But you were happy and you were loved. Those feelings were sometimes so intense that you would feel as if a part of you had been snatched from you.

Before you moved away for work, you were plagued by those daydreams. You didn’t recall when they started coming, but by the time you noticed, you realised that they were distracting you from life. You started writing, wondering if it was just another prompt or idea you needed to get out of your head but that didn’t work- they were out of control. And when you stopped writing and started working, it plagued your nights. 

You took the job for Sector 8 wondering if you needed to be away from your home, your hometown, to get away from the memories of someone that was you- that was what it felt like. Memories- or maybe they hadn’t even happened yet. 

Or maybe you were becoming delusional, way too much into fantasising about what could have been. But the whole year you spent telling yourself that you had read and written way too much fiction and needed to get back to real life and stop imagining things, that night at the train with Hongjoong made you wonder if you were wrong about yourself.

It wasn’t anything he did. It’s just that when you fell asleep, you had a dream about the blue-haired guy after a long time. And in that dream, you were thrumming along to a beat you were listening to.

“You like that?” The blue-haired guy asked. You tried looking at him, but it was like you couldn’t see him. You did not know whether he was older or younger than you. You did not know what he looked like, other than the unique hair. 

“You’re so good at this,” you replied, squeezing his hands and noticing a detail you hadn’t seen before- a single nail painted blue. 

When you woke up, you wondered where you had seen that. And when Hongjoong extended his hand to say goodbye, you noticed it. The same pinky finger, but painted black. How many people have you met who painted only their pinky finger? 

You were fearing that the lines between your dreams and reality were becoming blurry, which is why you left in the first place. It didn’t help that Hongjoong popped out of nowhere with an all too familiar vibe. Perhaps you dreamt about the painted pinky finger because of Hongjoong. Perhaps your blue haired guy never even touched nail paint- if he existed in the first place.

You stepped inside your apartment, dropping your bag on the couch and going to wash your face, cleaning up and changing before coming to your room and stopping in front of your wall with the softboard- the one where you chalked ideas, put polaroids of your memories, finding a lot of picture with Yunho and Mingi. And then you stared at the pattern of these photos- there was none. 

That’s what bugged you. You were eerily meticulous with how you arranged every part of your room. How you arranged your notes, the photos on your wall, your stationery, everything. And one strange day, you woke up and nothing in your room made sense to you. It was as if you had been placed into someplace foreign, even though it was your home. 

And that’s when the daydreams started. You searched the internet when it got worse but found nothing relevant. You gave up but didn’t change anything in your ‘new’ room, hoping it would one day rock your memory- if there was something in your memory in the first place. 

You pulled the covers over yourself, pushing away the thoughts and welcoming sleep after a long day.

—---------------------

You did not expect to run into Hongjoong so soon.

You were expecting at least a month to pass before you would stumble upon him somewhere- probably shopping for groceries if he lived in your area, or maybe at a cafe or a restaurant, maybe at a club. But certainly not in the middle of the night when you rushed out of your home to take a breather.

You were speed-walking to the park, thinking about the dream you just had. The blue-haired boy holding you so close- you could still feel the warmth of his touch on your arms. His voice- sometimes sounding familiar, sometimes sounding alien. But what really did it for you tonight was an all too familiar place- you had only been there once. The book-cafe in Sector 7. You had only been to Sector 7 once, and you recalled that you were not alone, however, no matter how hard you tried you couldn’t remember just who had accompanied you. But you had definitely been there- it was not a dream or a daydream. You could remember the layout of that place, the books you read there. You even found one of your books there and had a good laugh about it- with who?

You were thinking just that when you spotted your Cruella, dressed in all black, sitting on a bench with headphones on, staring into the distance- as if he, too, was trying to recall something but couldn’t. You smiled, forgetting all about the dream and instead taking a detour to sneak up on him from behind and sit beside him like a stranger would. He glanced at you and went back to staring into the distance and you watched recognition click on his face before he shifted his full attention towards you.

“I can’t believe this,” Hongjoong laughed, taking off his headphones. “What were the chances?”

“Is meeting in the middle of the night our thing now?” You shook his hand, scoffing. 

“Maybe it is,” he winked. “Do you live in this area?”

“Actually, yes. Block F,” you told him and he nodded.

“Block K,” he told you and you nodded- it wasn’t very far but it wasn’t close either. “How does it feel to be back home?”

“Strange but welcoming,” you shrugged. “How’s your sample coming along?”

You were talking about the sample he’d shown you on the train- some song he was composing for a band. “It’s been approved. You wanna hear it?”

“Hell yes,” you grinned, taking his headphones. “What are you calling it?”

“You gotta listen to it first,” he told you and you made a face but listened to the instrumental song, now fully composed. 

And you were in love instantly. With the song, of course. 

Hongjoong could tell you were enjoying it- the way your brows were furrowed as you focused, the way you were literally on your toes but slowly thrumming along to the beat. It made him a little giddy. And when you took off his headphones, you were gaping at him.

“It’s changed a lot since the last time, but I’m not complaining at all. It’s a masterpiece!” You exhaled, looking at him with wonder. “You’re truly an artist, Hongjoong.”

“Ah, you’re flattering me way too much,” he laughed, cheeks flushed and waving his hands dismissively. “It’s called Horizon. Does the name fit?”

“Definitely,” you mimicked his posture from when you found him sitting here. “Is that why you were staring at the… horizon?” Hongjoong stared at you deadpan, making you hide your face. “Admit it. That was funny.”

“A little,” he finally shook his head in amusement. “What brought you here in the middle of the night though?”

The smile fell off your lips. “Dreams.”

“Dreams and not nightmares? That’s new,” he made a face but he relaxed back, staring into the distance with you. “Care to share?”

“Just… very vivid dreams. Sometimes I wonder what was real and what was a dream.”

“I actually know what you mean,” he admitted and you looked at him. “I still think about those dreams and at this point, I’ve probably already mixed them with reality.”

You frowned. “When did you start having these dreams?”

“About a year ago, I think. It was a strange time for me, with work and all,” he sighed but you were thinking about how it was a coincidence- you started having these dreams around a year ago too. “We’re both artists, you and I, y/n. My medium is music and yours is writing. When we get a little too creative… I guess it happens. Dreams become mixed with reality, and we have to take a step back but it keeps plaguing us, back there in our heads. Isn’t that why you needed a change of pace and became a literary editor?”

“No one has figured me out this quickly, not even my therapist,” you exhaled and the two of you began laughing at the absurdity. “But you’re right. Is that why you decided to go to Sector 8 too?”

“I only went four months ago to work with a producer, but I know I wouldn’t have if I didn’t need to get out of this place,” Hongjoong told you. “But I’m saying that I totally get what you mean. And I think it’s good to dream- better than not dreaming at all.”

“That’s kinda poetic,” you teased. “But is it good to dream if you can’t figure out what’s real and what’s not?”

“That’s the fun part, isn’t it?” Hongjoong smiled. “You get to decide.”

You looked at him- really looked at him this time. Messy hair, tired but sparkling eyes, lazy smile, relaxed posture. Was life so easy for him? To figure out stuff like this? Maybe you need to stop being so strict with yourself and start acting a little like Hongjoong.

But… there was a strange tug in your heart that told you that you needed to delve into your past to figure stuff out before you ever decide to dismiss it. At least after the dream tonight.

So you straightened and smiled at Hongjoong before telling him, “I think if we can’t differentiate between dreams and reality… we need to get a grip. If you don’t even know yourself, how are you supposed to move on and begin to know other people?”

“But we never truly know ourselves,” he countered. “We do things that surprise even us.”

“But we should be aware of ourselves, and you, Hongjoong,” you poked his temple, making him groan and laugh at the same time. “You need to be aware of yourself too. And don’t give me the ‘I’m very aware’ bullshit. We’re in this shit together, it seems.”

“Well then, let’s find self-awareness together, shall we?” You couldn’t tell if he was being serious or was just teasing you. “Also, are you going to ditch me like last time or do I get to have your phone number now?”

You grinned at him and exchanged contact information. “Let’s meet for coffee sometime?”

“Definitely,” he nodded and you looked at the time. “You should get going.”

“You should too,” you pursed your lips. “It’s almost 4.”

“You wanna see something?” He asked out of the blue and you raised your brow, even more in surprise when he took your hand and led you to where a bunch of trees were, making you laugh out loud when he gently pushed you down by the shoulders to make you sit, and then he lied down.

“Come,” he patted the space next to him and you lied down as well, frowning at him in mild amusement. 

“You think this is a nice spot to sleep?”

“Shut up and look,” he pointed upwards and you followed his gaze-

Finding stars shine from between the leaves of the trees. “Woah. That’s something I’d like to see before sleeping every night.”

“I know,” he smiled. “I like to watch this when I can’t sleep at night.”

“I can see why,” you said and looked at Hongjoong-

His side-profile looked awfully familiar. It was unique- he had those features you rarely saw on anyone. A very memorable and handsome face. Now why did he look familiar?

You were having a daydream again- or was it a flashback? You were lying down just like this, right here, with your blue-haired boy.

“Y/n?” Hongjoong clicked his fingers in front of you and you shook yourself out of the trance.

“Can I ask you something?” You cleared your throat and he nodded. “Do you dye your hair often?”

Hongjoong was thrown back by the sudden curiosity and he laughed a little. “Yeah, you could say. I’ve had ginger hair, blonde, pink, blue and red too. I’ve tried many different colours.”

Blue.

“Blue sounds interesting. Do you have some pictures of yourself from when you had blue hair?”

“Not right now- I got a new phone a few days ago so it’s basically empty,” he told you and you nodded. “You like blue?”

“Yep,” you smiled. “I think it’s my favourite colour. But I really like your hair now too. I never thought it would look this good on a person.”

“Thanks,” Hongjoong smiled shyly. “I think I’m going to keep it for a while.”

“Sounds good,” you turned to look up, trying not to conjure up the image of blue-haired Hongjoong.

—------------------

Your coffee date with Hongjoong had taken a wilder turn than any of you had intended.

Firstly, you showed up half an hour late, making up the excuse of ‘work’ when the real reason was that you spent hours in front of the mirror trying different outfits because Hongjoong was always looking incredibly good with all his details and you were honestly a mess in comparison.

Secondly, you were wondering if this was a ‘date’ or just a casual meetup where you’re still getting to know each other and becoming friends. You were pretty sure it was the second but that didn’t keep you from stressing over the fact that you, for the first time in years, were trying to socialise with a random stranger. Your only other friends were Yunho and Mingi, both from high school. And they couldn’t help but make fun of you.

“You think seeing me after six months would have done it,” Mingi began, glancing at Yunho, “but she shows up at my place with her hair looking like a nest and in her sweats, barely holding herself up with her laptop and books, and asks to stay over because she needed a break. That’s how she decided to meet me.”

“Ah, is that so?” Yunho laughed. “She looked pretty decent when she met me. I almost got scared.”

“That was because I was coming back from work,” you looked at Yunho pointedly, and then turned to Mingi. “And that was because I was in the library all day and didn’t have the energy to go all the way back home. Your place was like two streets away. And Yunho- you missed that. I even met Seonghwa- the new roommate.”

“Oh? In that state?” Yunho groaned. “My plan to set you two up has already failed then.”

“He liked me,” you simply said. “We talked a bit.”

“That’s just him being kind,” Mingi scoffed. “When you went to sleep, he asked me if you were ‘alright’. He looked like he knew you from someplace.”

“Oh, goodness,” you stopped drying your hair. “Did I look that bad? And he should have told me if I looked familiar.”

“Not your best, you gotta admit,” Mingi ran a hand through his brown hair. “And you’re getting dolled up for a stranger you met on the train? I don’t recall the last time you actually made an effort to look good for someone.”

“I’m not doing it for him, I’m doing it for me,” you said but Yunho and Mingi didn’t look pleased. You rolled your eyes. “Fine. I want to look good. And don’t give me that look- it’s not a date. We’re only friends, still getting to know each other-”

“Which means the possibility is there,” Yunho grinned. “I hope it works this time.”

“What do you mean this time?” You frowned- you didn’t recall any previous time.

“Weren’t you maybe dating someone like two years ago?” Yunho tried to recall. “You didn’t tell us the details but I think you were.”

“Was I?” You frowned. “I don’t remember-”

Your phone buzzed and you read the text from Hongjoong saying he had arrived at the cafe, which was when you realised you were running late. You had to push Yunho and Mingi out of your room so you could finally change and get ready without further distractions. 

So now that you were in front of Hongjoong late, anxiously wondering if this was a date, and already feeling nervous because of how good he was looking in all-black, you were wondering just what was happening- especially when Hongjoong asked you if you wanted to join him at the music festival that was taking place in the arena- he had just gotten two free passes from a friend who was working there.

“Wow, that’s gotta be wild!” You laughed nervously. You wanted to go so badly-

“We can skip if you want to,” Hongjoong was carefully scanning your face.

“No, I’m just wondering if I have any prior engagements for tonight,” you asked him to give you a second so you could check your schedule. You were free. You glanced up at him with a growing smile which he reflected. “Am I underdressed?”

“Nobody cares, we’re good,” Hongjoong said after scanning your outfit. "You look pretty in blue."

"Thanks," you smiled shyly, wondering what it was about him that made you nervous. "You look pretty in everything."

Hongjoong laughed out loud. "That's something I needed to hear."

"I'm not joking!" You huffed. "My friends were making fun of me because I couldn't decide what to wear. You look like someone who would look good in a sack too."

"That's definitely an exaggeration," he scoffed but leaned forward, face resting casually on his hands. "Were you dressing up for me? Is that why you're so late?"

You didn't expect the rush of heat in your stomach but you liked the thrill. "And if I was?"

Hongjoong shook his head, amused. "Let's make the most of tonight then, huh?"

As you exited the cafe, you bumped into a woman who seemed to be in a rush, making her bag drop. You sighed, helping her up and handing her the bag with an apology. 

“It’s okay,” she smiled at you and then at Hongjoong and her smile fell. You frowned at that.

“Are you feeling alright?” You asked. “Let me help you inside- you look pale.”

“No, it’s alright, I just need to get my coffee,” she said, scanning you both again with a smile this time. “Date night?”

Hongjoong and you laughed at that. “Kind of,” he said.

“Good luck,” she patted your shoulder and you watched her go inside.

“She seemed familiar for some reason,” Hongjoong said.

“It looked like you seemed familiar to her too,” you commented. “Maybe an old colleague?”

“Maybe. Let’s go.”

A few minutes later, you were at the arena, the combination of loud music and Hongjoong holding your hand as he guided you through the crowd making your heart sound like it was between your ears. Thankfully, it wasn't very crowded. Hongjoong led you to the front where the band was rehearsing before they would start playing- they started lowering the volume and Hongjoong turned towards you. 

"Do you prefer watching or would you like to dance along?"

"I think once I'm feeling it, I might dance along," you shrugged. "I can't say- it's been a while since I came to someplace like this."

"Well, I guess you'll be learning a few things about yourself tonight," he winked, noticing that he was still holding your hand. "Should we stay here then?"

"For now," you nodded, squeezing his hand in appreciation before leaving it, taking a deep breath and smiling as you looked around. "You must come here often."

"I haven't been here in a while as well," he looked troubled and you decided not to ask further about the reason. "But I feel kind of nostalgic now that I'm here."

"I'm excited to see what you look like when you're in your medium, Kim Hongjoong," you teased and he rolled his eyes.

"You have to see me in my workplace. You won't recognise me."

You raised a brow- somehow, you had imagined that he looked kind of hot as he worked. He had that kind of vibe to him. But as if he had read your mind (or noticed you biting your lips) he shook his head. "People avoid me when I'm working on something. I really don't wanna be disturbed and I get frustrated easily too."

"That's pretty similar to writing. When I have an idea, I need all my attention focused on writing. If someone distracts me, I'll burst."

Hongjoong smiled, nodding. It was very true. "For now, I think we can let loose and enjoy."

As if on cue, the speakers were back at full volume, making you grit your teeth momentarily as you got used to the sound of your bones shaking and then you were swaying along to the beat in a light manner, much like Hongjoong. He seemed to know the song- or maybe he was just better at this than you, but his grin told you you were doing just fine.

The rest of the night was a blur- it took you only another few songs to completely lose yourself into the music. You were soon reflecting Hongjoong’s wild energy and if you could see yourself from afar at that moment, you wouldn’t recognise yourself. It was as if either something had possessed you or you’d finally let go of the things bothering you. 

When you exited the arena and went to the food stalls, Hongjoong grabbed water bottles and you took a big few gulps before exhaling loudly. “I think I should have just come to a concert before deciding I was depressed and needed to change my environment. This is free therapy!”

Hongjoong laughed loudly. “Post-concert depression is also a thing. Don’t move around after that.”

“Really?” You said but realised that your heart was still pounding and your legs were still thrumming along to some beat. “You better deal with that mess then.”

“Oh, I will,” he smirked and you raised a brow. You hadn’t missed the ‘casual’ touches Hongjoong had passed throughout the concert, nor had you missed how he glanced at you more often than necessary. And he alone wasn’t to blame- you hadn’t been subtle either. There was an undeniable pull between you two and it wasn’t helping that you two were tiptoeing around it and not addressing it. “You wanna take a walk and calm down before we go home?”

You nodded and didn’t protest when he took your hand in his and guided you to the exit, avoiding people he recognised because he didn’t want you to feel overwhelmed. Once you were out, you intertwined your fingers as a silent thanks and to let him know you didn’t mind holding hands. 

“I won’t forget tonight,” Hongjoong’s voice was low. “I enjoyed it very much.”

“Me too,” you pursed your lips. “It was also a bit nostalgic being there- I don’t know why, but I just felt… like I’ve been there before.”

“Really?” Hongjoong looked genuinely surprised. “I felt the same- I’ve been to many concerts but this was the first time I felt so nostalgic- but more like I was having an intense deja vu.”

“I think it’s us,” you grinned at him. “When I was writing for fun, I read something that stuck with me- that there are some people we know in another reality. We instantly feel a connection with them and they make us feel like we’ve been there before- with them. Do you think so too?”

“I didn’t know it was actually a thing,” Hongjoong seemed fascinated. “I thought it was just because I liked you a little too much.”

You tried suppressing a grin but failed, bumping against him on purpose, squeezing his hand. He copied that and you two giggled like kids. “That’s the most cheesy thing I’ve heard in a while. I think I should use it in one of my books.”

“I’d read that,” he laughed and you both paused when you reached the intersection- you were to go left and he to right. He turned you towards him, looking down at your still joined hands. “I think you should let go now.”

“I think you’re the one still holding, see?” You flexed your fingers in his hand and he chuckled. 

“I’m taking you to dinner next time- a real date. If… if you’d like to,” Hongjoong asked cautiously.

You pretended to think about it. “I think I’d like to. Very much. Good night, Hongjoong, and thank you for today.”

You leaned forward to plant a kiss on his cheek, making his eyes go wide in surprise. You grinned at that, waving and rushing off before he could respond because god, he looked absolutely hot when he looked at you that way.

And you were glad he had voiced that he liked you and that you weren’t hallucinating or reading too much into things. Because you liked Kim Hongjoong very much. It was strange how it felt like you had known him longer than the actual few weeks because you weren’t the kind of person to open up to someone this quickly, nor did you get along with many people.

You put your hands in your pocket as you walked back and felt something in one of the pockets- a card. You took it out and frowned in confusion- you didn’t remember putting this business card in your pocket, nor did you remember ever meeting Lee Sunmi from ‘Wonderland Intelligence Service’. The WIS was a government organisation- something not even known to the general public. Why did you have the business card of someone from the WIS?

As you got home and changed, you sat in front of your laptop on the table, staring at your plain black desktop screen, zoned out. There was this feeling like something scratching at your subconscious- you just couldn’t figure it out. And when you felt something wet on your cheeks, you realised it was tears. You wiped your face, suddenly overwhelmed, and decided to cry your heart out when you couldn’t hold it back anymore. 

You couldn’t figure out what was this sadness clinging to you like a part of your soul- it followed you everywhere. You couldn’t find its origin nor could you see its end. All you knew was that there was something you had forgotten- it couldn’t just be your dreams and imagination making you sad. There was no way. You had forgotten something, and whatever it was, it must have been important to you. 

You needed to find answers. And you would start with yourself. Tomorrow.

Tonight, you cry, alone.

In his apartment, having washed up, Hongjoong sat in his studio-room in front of his big setup of laptops and PCs, a mess of wires and screens and speakers and earphones lying around. It was always comforting to simply sit and stare, even if he wasn’t working. He thought about the concert earlier, about you, with a faint smile on his face.

He couldn’t remember the last time he had let loose like this. You probably wouldn’t believe it if he told you, but he wasn’t always like this. There was just something utterly familiar and comforting and welcoming about you that made him open up to you and befriend you, that made him want more than being just friends. He thought you were absolutely pretty- in the way you held yourself, in the way you talked. And he had seen a new side of you tonight- the wild side, and oh, he knew in that moment that he was done for. There was no coming back now.

He had to have you. 

Hongjoong opened up a few folders, trying to find old concert footage or photos from the last time he went- probably a year or two ago, maybe even earlier. He had a habit of organising his folders by years, and he went to open the one from last year, not finding much, just some photos of the scenery that usually served as inspiration when he produced or composed. He opened the folder from two years ago, finding photos of-

Sector 7? The board read Sector 7 in one of the photos. He frowned as he tried to recall- when exactly had he gone to Sector 7? He couldn’t quite recall and he thought it odd- he wasn’t one with memory issues, he had never been. Hongjoong opened one of the photos- Sector 7 was famous for its hills and rivers. He scrolled through the photos of clouds, hills, flowers, finding a few of himself and then some of a cafe- a book cafe, it looked like. 

Hongjoong stared at the photo for a long time- it seemed awfully familiar but it was odd that he couldn’t recall what he was doing at a book cafe. He wasn’t the type to go to cafes alone- certainly not book cafes. It was also a bit odd that he could only recall fragments of his trip if he tried hard. He shrugged, opening his music files from that year- perhaps something would rock his memory.

There were surprisingly more tracks there than he had expected. He opened a random one, which was a guitar sample. Before he could open another, his phone rang and he went to find it, finding his old friend Seonghwa calling and he slumped on the bed, talking to him for a long part of the night and catching up, forgetting all about the audio and music files in his folder.

—---------------------

“Do you ever think that you’ve been replaced in another reality? That you’ve… switched with the ‘you’ of the other dimension?”

“What in the world have you been reading again?” Mingi looked up from his laptop to frown at you. “Don’t tell me you stayed up all night reading those conspiracy theories again.”

“Doesn’t it make sense?” You continued, pouting as you played with the rings on your fingers. “You remember everything because you’ve lived the same life, but at the same time, some of your memories… there’s a glitch.”

“Definitely the conspiracy theories,” Yunho muttered, not even bothering to look up at you as he worked on something, picking his mug to take a sip of his coffee. “Why are you here again? I thought you had better places to be.”

“This was ‘better places’,” you threw a pen at Yunho who scoffed. “I am unwanted. I should make myself scarce.”

“Now you realise, after like a decade of our friendship,” Mingi sighed deeply and you cursed out loud, straightening when you heard keys jingle and the door unlocking.

“Hi guys- oh, you’re here too,” Seonghwa waved at you and you smiled, waving back. “I’m just stopping by to throw my stuff- I’m hanging out with a friend tonight. Don’t wait for me at dinner.”

“Ah, we’ll have to order takeout again,” Mingi sighed again and Yunho laughed. Seonghwa stopped to point his finger accusingly at the two before rushing to his room. You looked at Yunho who was eyeing you rather suspiciously.

“What?” You challenged- you had told him you were not interested in Seonghwa like that, but Yunho seemed intent to do something about your relationship status, saying it was necessary at this point- you had been single way too long. 

“Nothing,” Yunho stifled a smile and you all waved at Seonghwa as he said bye. You looked back at Yunho. “Can you stop smiling like a clown and tell me- if you knew your memories were going to be lost, what would you do?”

“If and only if you’re writing again, I’ll answer,” Yunho challenged. You pursed your lips.

“Maybe I will.”

“Fine,” Yunho straightened, thinking. It had always been like this- you, sitting aimlessly around the two, throwing the most random questions and mostly talking to yourself. It helped straighten your thoughts out and that helped when you wrote. “So I know my memories are going to be lost, and I want to protect the cherished ones?”

“Kind of, yes,” you nodded, thinking about your dreams. “There’s someone important to you that you’re going to forget. You can’t avoid it. What would you do?”

“Maybe you wanted to forget them,” Mingi almost mumbled. He looked up from his laptop to find you two staring at him. “Just a thought, carry on.”

You made a face and Yunho reflected, saying, “That’s plausible too. But… maybe I’d keep something in case I want to remember, huh? How would that even work?”

“Maybe a journal or a picture… or an object that would remind me of them?” You mused. “But all of that’s easily manipulated. Something I would know for sure is real.”

“And you can’t rely on your memories, if they come back?” Yunho looked confused. “Because you can’t figure out what was real and what was your imagination. I read something similar once too.”

“Yeah, so what would you do?” You asked. 

“I don’t know,” Yunho shrugged. “Probably hide something that belonged to them in a place only I would know.”

“Or hide something in plain sight but decipherable only to you- if you want to remember,” Mingi contributed and you did a double-take because that was the kind of thing you would do as well. “Maybe you shouldn’t be looking too far, you know?”

“You’re kind of a genius, Mingi,” you acknowledged and he simply saluted.

“But the kind of people you both are, you’d be staring right at it for the rest of your life and never figure it out,” Yunho sighed and the two of you laughed- that was something that was definitely a possibility with you and Mingi. “You’ll have better luck hiding a time capsule. At least you could be right about the location if you ever decide to bury one.”

“But… where would I bury a time capsule?” Mingi was not fully invested in the discussion, having put aside his laptop and shifting on the couch. “I have several places in mind. Do I go digging around at each site? I’d look like a maniac”

“Think of a place special to you,” Yunho mused, relaxing back. “Some place you go to when you’re alone. A place special to you, known only to you.”

“I don’t have such a place I think,” you said, disappointed. “Probably my room is the closest to the description.”

Mingi snickered at that and Yunho shook his head, “There’s always such a place for everyone. You just gotta think.”

You did think when you got back home that night. You combed through your room, spending hours rearranging the mess in your drawers, pausing at certain objects with a smile- like the mini penguin plushie from Mingi at your last birthday or the box of stationery from Yunho which contained everything you needed whenever you were in the process of writing something- markers, sticky notes, even some words of affirmations handwritten by Yunho himself, some scolding you to stop slacking. 

Some objects made you sad as well- remnants of your childhood, of your parents, a few items making you incredibly nostalgic. But everything you owned had a distinct memory attached to it- there was nothing out of the ordinary in your room. You even searched through your laptop for any journal entries (you weren’t the type, though) or anything, but the only thing amiss was a draft for what you assumed had to be a story prompt. It was in a folder where you kept the few selfies you sometimes took. You thought it was odd that a text file was there but it had probably been because you were in a rush. You opened it and skimmed through it- some plot about a writer being a spy hired by her country to investigate illegal activities in the entertainment industry. You smiled to yourself- it wasn’t an unusual plot for you as you usually wrote crime novels, but there was a hint of romance in this one, which was new because you never wanted to add romance in your books.

You sighed- maybe you were losing it, maybe you needed to go out more. 

And when Hongjoong texted and offered to take you out on a lunch date two days later, you agreed, forgetting about the blue-haired boy that had been plaguing your thoughts recently.

—-----------------

Hanging out with Hongjoong every other day was becoming a part of your routine- meeting up for coffee in the evenings, getting dinner together a few times or just late night walks in the park when you first met him- because you lived so close to each other, it wasn’t too hard to meet up. And you weren’t going to complain- you were in a better mood these days, as observed by Mingi and Yunho.

They teased you often about Hongjoong- you hadn’t told them anything about him yet. You knew they would never let you live if things with Hongjoong didn’t turn out like you were expecting, so you teased them to bits especially when they tried guessing his name.

“Sometimes I have a feeling that it’s Seonghwa- but then… he would have told us, right?” Yunho looked at Mingi and he scoffed.

“Seonghwa wouldn’t like her,” Mingi pointed with his controller, going back to playing the video game as if he hadn’t just insulted you.

“Excuse me? What’s so wrong about me, why are you always like this?” You were whining now, poking his thigh with your feet that were sprawled over the couch and Yunho laughed. 

“I’m just saying Seonghwa knows better. You’re a mess, frankly. No wonder you’re still single- ouch!”

“Well deserved,” Yunho agreed with you this time, complimenting your aim- you had tossed a pillow at Mingi and it had barely missed his eyes. “She’s not that bad-”

“Not helping, Yunho,” you put a finger on your lips, indicating to him to shut up if he couldn’t say anything better. “Honestly? Admit it I’m better than those girls who put on this fake persona. At least I’m real. Who doesn’t like that? What if I was a stuck-up bitch who only cared about how her nails looked- oh, hi, Seonghwa.”

You didn’t mind Seonghwa now, mostly because he didn’t mind your presence, though he had been wary for the first few times you came over. He explained that it was just because he was shy but you got comfortable with each other soon- perhaps because with Yunho and Mingi present, it felt like you were all old friends.

It didn’t help that Seonghwa knew way more about you than you’d like, thanks to certain two loud-mouthed friends of yours. Seonghwa waved, sitting across from you. “You were saying?”

“Nothing,” you smiled sweetly but Yunho had other plans. 

“She’s still not telling us who it is she’s been meeting up with. She’s not even telling us if they’re still friends or more,” Yunho sighed dramatically.

“She’ll tell you when she wants to, isn’t that right?” Seonghwa winked at her and you looked at him gratefully. “You haven’t ordered yet, have you? I should ask Hongjoong when he’s coming.”

You frowned, watching Seonghwa fish out his phone and text ‘Hongjoong’. “Your friend who’s joining us today- he’s called Hongjoong?”

“Yep,” Seonghwa finished texting, looking up. You had a funny look on your face as you looked at Yunho who was following you and you scoffed.

“What are the chances?” You muttered.

“AH, so he’s called Hongjoong?” Yunho raised a brow. “Let’s wait for this Hongjoong to arrive then. Let’s not talk more about him.”

You felt a sudden thrill- was it really such a small world you lived in? And if Hongjoong really was Seonghwa’s friend… that would be a big coincidence. 

And it turned out to be right. When you spotted the familiar ‘oreo-hair’, as you titled it, you hid your face in your hands for a moment before looking up at Hongjoong, who paused and looked at everyone in the room before back at you, and then you two were laughing like madmen.

“I’m kicking them both out,” Mingi got up, laughing along as he dragged you by the arm. “Get out of my apartment, you’re scaring me with the way you’re laughing!”

“No, it’s just…” you finished laughing, wiping your eyes. “He’s the Hongjoong that I- that I’m friends with.”

“Just friends?” Seonghwa asked. “I thought Hongjoong loved you or something-”

“Shut up, Seonghwa,” Hongjoong smacked his arms. “We’re… dating. I think.”

“You think?” Yunho guided Hongjoong to sit. “You better tell us everything, the two of you.”

And so you did. You two were meeting up every other day, yes. Maybe you could call it a date, but you two found out that you preferred really getting to know each other before defining your relationship- friends, or more. And so far, you two were still confused.

“You two definitely like each other, look at the hearts in your eyes,” Seonghwa sighed dramatically. “Get a room.”

“Seonghwa, please,” you groaned. Seonghwa was one of Hongjoong’s oldest friends and you felt like you could instantly trust him- and that also made you two more comfortable with each other, as friends. “Shut up and eat.”

“Yes, ma’am,” he obeyed, taking another slice of pizza. “So you two met on the train, then by chance, found each other in the park. And now you’re dating. You should write a book. And you, Hongjoong. I bet you’ve already written a song about her.”

Mingi snickered at that and Hongjoong groaned loudly. “Let’s leave, y/n.”

“Let’s,” you folded your arms, waiting for anyone to stop you but the three hyenas were too busy laughing and eating. “I hate you all.”

“Hate is a strong word,” Mingi commented.

“I wish there was a stronger word in my head right now,” you smiled sweetly at him and then looked at Hongjoong. “You know, if you had mentioned a certain Seonghwa being your friend, I would have connected the dots.”

“I did!” Hongjoong said. “I’m sure I did… you could have mentioned Yunho or Mingi too!”

The two of you got into an argument that escalated from being bad with names to arguing about why you had memory issues recently and why Hongjoong couldn’t separate dreams from reality when you realised the three of them were quietly listening to everything.

“My god,” Mingi was the first to break the silence. “They’re just like each other.”

You rolled your eyes but smiled and for the rest of the night you tolerated your group of friends, giving in to their teasing. That’s just how it was between the three of you, and from the looks of it, Seonghwa and Hongjoong shared a similar relationship as well. You found yourself looking around, heart full- these were your people. 

You wished you all would stay like this for a long time.

When it was almost midnight, you grabbed your stuff and said goodbyes. Hongjoong was quick to get up and offered to walk you and you nodded- you two would be going to the same path anyway, at least for a while. 

“It’s a small world,” Hongjoong found himself laughing as the two of you walked through the streets. “I never expected this.”

“Me neither,” you grinned. “It was becoming a joke at this point because I wasn’t telling your name to any of them on purpose.”

“Why though?” Hongjoong sounded curious. “Because they would tease you?”

“Oh, I’m used to that, it even goes over my head now,” you shook your head. “It’s just… I’ve had a bad experience with dating- god, that sounds wrong. I just mean that dating rarely works for me, which has become an inside joke now.”

“Maybe you just haven’t found the right guy yet?” Hongjoong looked hopeful and you passed him a look but then sighed.

“I think it’s a me-problem. I’m rarely ever emotionally available. That doesn’t sit well with people- they don’t expect it from me even if I tell them beforehand. And when they do find out… it doesn’t end well.”

“I can relate to that- I’m more of the ‘physically absent’ person when it comes to dating, being always busy with work. I’ve always put work as my priority and that doesn’t sit well with people.”

“They say they understand, they all do… but they never really understand. I’m just- I don’t deal with the dramatics, Hongjoong. I hate it when someone’s being vague with me. I want to hear the truth, and I want to tell the truth. That sounds simple but that’s probably the hardest thing to do.”

“It is,” Hongjoong was nodding. “The truth isn’t always what people want to hear.”

“I think,” you were now stepping in the blocks of the tiles along the pavement and Hongjoong found it adorable that you were avoiding the lines. “I think I really like you Hongjoong. You’re honest, unfiltered, and you know your priorities. I like that. I’m just figuring out if we’re better off as friends or if we should try being more.”

“Ah,” Hongjoong’s heart did a somersault. “I kind of understand what you meant about yourself. You make it sound like it’s very simple, y/n, making that sort of a decision.”

“Isn’t it?” You stopped and turned to him, grinning. “I like you. I could kiss you right now. But if you tell me we think we’re better off as friends, I would-”

You didn’t get to complete your sentence because Hongjoong had cupped your face and was kissing you urgently, as if trying to tell you to stop thinking anymore. You got the message and brought your hands to his shoulders, squeezing them as you kissed him back, tasting chocolate from the dessert you had just before you left. You kissed him deeper, stifling a groan because he could kiss, and his hands travelling to the back of your head and cradling your neck were driving you insane.

Hongjoong broke apart, your breaths mingling as he rested his forehead against yours. “I- I’ve been wanting to do that for so long, y/n. Can we try being more than friends?”

“Of course,” your response was quick. “I didn’t realise that you liked me this much.”

Hongjoong laughed when you poked his stomach. He poked it back, drawing apart a bit and tucking your hair back. “There’s just something about you that speaks to me in a familiar way. I think we’d be good together, don’t you think so?”

You nodded. You two could be good together. You snaked your hand in his and urged him to walk with you. “Do you want to go to Sector 7 with me, Hongjoong?”

“Sector 7? What for?” He asked.

“There’s a place I need to go,” you sighed deeply. “I need to solve a mystery. And I need you with me as I do it.”

“You’re being weird,” Hongjoong teased but when he saw that you were serious, he paused. “Is this about your dreams- the flashbacks? You want to confirm?”

“Kind of, yeah,” you nodded. You had told him about your flashbacks- of a presence that you missed, of places you’ve been to or things you’ve done that you no longer had a memory of. 

Surprisingly, Hongjoong hadn’t deemed you insane. He had been nothing but a great help, telling you that it was okay, urging you to explore and find answers if it was bugging you to the point that you had trouble sleeping. Hongjoong squeezed your hand yet again, as he had so many times. “I’ll be with you.”

That night, the two of you discovered a missing piece in the long-forgotten puzzle. 

Hongjoong sat, lovestruck, in front of his PC, scrolling through some old samples looking for inspiration. He came upon an unclosed tab from days ago- those samples that he didn’t recall producing. And when he played all of them patiently, his chest tight from the intense deja vu, he couldn’t help but think that he, too, had a mystery to solve. And perhaps, going to Sector 7 with you would rock his memory. It was incredibly odd that you were going to Sector 7 because of a similar question as well- maybe you two didn’t realise it yet but you were both on the same journey, with one destination. But why- how could this happen?

How could this happen, you thought as you went through the draft that you had read a few days ago. It was starting to look less like a draft and more like a narration of events- there was the blue haired boy. He was a producer. The main character was a writer. And the blue haired boy had said something-

“Cold snowflakes wither and fall Until you bloom as a spring flower I’ll be with you-”

You hadn’t made the connection until you were showering after coming back, recalling what Hongjoong had said just before you had parted ways- ‘I’ll be with you’. It would have been a casual phrase but then you recalled seeing these lyrics in Hongjoong’s music journal- he was working on the rhythm for the song. As soon as you finished showering, you were wondering just where you had heard it before- and then about an hour later, you found it in your draft.

Could your blue haired boy really be Hongjoong? If so, what was the reason you didn’t remember him? You supposed there was only one way to find out- Sector 7.

—--------------------

You decided not to mention that you suspected Hongjoong to be your blue haired boy for several reasons. He could be pretending not to know you, which was very suspicious. He could have forgotten you as well, which was more suspicious. But you were going to be testing Hongjoong today- you were going to be watching his every move and see just what was going on.

Clearly, he was doing the same thing as you. As you two sat in the train, deciding public transport would be the best since you had no idea how long this trip would take, you both were feeling that same deja vu like the last time you shared a train journey together, and…

You both were staring at each other. Without shame.

Hongjoong was the first to give in with a nervous laugh and he brushed his clothes, running a hand through his hair. “You know… I don’t like being watched.”

“Maybe you’re just a very pretty sight to see, you know,” you were chewing gum fiercely. “Maybe I’m… memorising your face. After all, we kissed two days ago. I thought we were going somewhere, Hongjoong-”

“Stop teasing me,” he laughed, and your heart swelled when you found his cheeks flushed. Even if Hongjoong wasn’t who he was pretending to be, which you were maybe 49 percent sure was the case, he was still a very cute and handsome and sexy guy. You mentally slapped yourself for not coming up with better vocabulary as a writer, but hey, what could you say? He did render you at loss for words oftentimes. 

“Are we not going to address where we stand, Hongjoong?” You teased again, poking his shoes with your own. 

“I think…” Hongjoong scanned you and you made weird faces but he tried to be serious. “I think that I don’t know who you are, y/n.”

“Well, we never really know each other. I won’t claim I know myself either, at this point,” you almost mumbled the last part.

“I can relate to that,” Hongjoong sighed, scooting to the corner. “Why are we really going to Sector 7? And I need to hear the truth this time, y/n. You’re not giving me answers and I don’t know why I followed you- I mean, I trust you. I feel like I can trust you, but I don’t know where we are headed.”

“Well, I’m glad to hear that you trust me,” you said- you really were. “It’s just… I don’t know why I’m going either. I just need to go and I need to find some answers. I need to clear my suspicions. I think I forgot something important, Hongjoong. We’re visiting a book cafe- I hope to find answers there.”

Hongjoong straightened up after hearing that. Could it be? “The book cafe at the top of the hill?”

“Ah, you’ve been there?” Now that was news to you and certainly made things more confusing.

“I think I have,” Hongjoong nodded. “I was scrolling through some old photos and found some. I don’t really recall going there, though, which is odd.”

“Well, I think you might be involved then, Hongjoong,” you said cautiously and he frowned in confusion. “Did you, perhaps, have blue hair when you went to that book cafe?”

“From the pictures I saw? Yes. But did we go at the same time?” Hongjoong asked. “Do you remember when you went there? I checked the date- I went around 2 years ago.”

“I don’t have proof that I went there, just… flashbacks,” you sighed. “Which is why I cannot trust my memory and need concrete proof. And I don’t want to think of you as the blue haired boy until I’m sure it was you. Because if you think about it… could we have known each other? Really? What is this then, mind wiping? Time travel? Alternate reality?”

“Slow down,” Hongjoong grinned.

“I might be going overboard with my imagination but I’m not crazy, Hongjoong,” you said but Hongjoong nodded sarcastically- you didn’t sound very convincing. You groaned, giving in. “Okay, yes, I’m going to prove that I’m not crazy. Why are you going?”

“To prove that I’m not crazy,” Hongjoong admitted and you raised a brow. “I found some samples that I don’t remember producing. A few photos that I don’t remember taking. And they were kind of hidden, in my own laptop, if that makes sense,” he looked at you. “As if I hid them from myself.”

“Crazy because I found a draft too,” you told him. “It’s supposed to be a story but I think it’s meant to be a narration.”

“But if we did know each other… and if we’ve forgotten- I’m entertaining this crazy impossible idea only because we’re on the train and we have time to kill,” he looked pointedly at you and you scoffed. “But… what I’m saying is that if we knew each other… the people around us would have known about us too, right? Like Seonghwa, Yunho, Mingi. But we’re all strangers, aren’t we?”

“But the timeline…” you leaned forward. “It was almost a year ago that I woke up in my room and thought that I was an alien because nothing in my room made sense to me! I told you about that- I always, always make patterns, but there were missing photos on the softboard, the room was a mess-”

“One drunken night could do wonders-”

“We’re theorising, okay, let’s explore every possibility,” you slapped his thigh and he shrugged. “I was feeling so disoriented. Didn’t something like that happen to you too?”

“It did,” he had told you about it- it wasn’t as obvious to him but he felt this intense dread for no reason. It was like he had lost something important but didn’t know. The kind of gut feeling you get when something bad is about to happen. “But it could have been a coincidence.”

“Duh, but we’re thinking of possibilities other than coincidences,” you leaned back, biting your nails as you thought. “It can’t be a past life. It could be an alternate reality but… let’s think realistically first, huh?”

“Sure,” Hongjoong laughed. “Such a realistic trip we’re going on.”

“Look, if you think I’ve lost it after this trip, we can pretend the kiss never happened and go back to being friends,” you laughed but it fell when you saw the look Hongjoong gave- like he was going to scold you. “Unless you don’t want to be friends anymore?”

You almost sank to your knees- you hadn’t entertained the possibility that Hongjoong might actually think that you are nuts and never want to see you again. But when Hongjoong leaned forward and grabbed your hands in his, you found him smiling. 

“One of the reasons I like you is because of your brain- even though it doesn’t make sense most of the time,” he laughed and you joined, feeling relieved. “I like how you think. You make me look at the world differently, y/n.”

“Yeah. The crazy pov must help a lot with producing and stuff, huh?” You said and he chuckled. 

“I just connect with you, crazy or not,” Hongjoong said. “We’re friends no matter what. We’re friends first, no matter what answers we might find ahead. Can we shake hands on that?”

“Definitely,” you shook hands with him.

“If what you’re thinking is true… it could be something ugly,” he sounded grim. “But… let’s remember this moment. I would like you to hold my hand if I want to run away, and I can do the same for you.”

“Hongjoong, you’re gonna make me cry,” your lips were quivering as you looked up.

“Don’t cry,” he cupped your face, wiping your eyes. “Let’s trust each other, okay? Let’s not hide things.”

“Let’s not run away from the truth,” you added and he nodded, kissing your forehead. “Talking about the truth, what if one of our friends knows about us but is hiding it from us?”

It was Hongjoong’s turn to smack the spot on your forehead where he had just kissed you. “You think too much, I’ll admit.”

“Ah,” you shook your head in disappointment, drawing away. “All that talk about finding my brain sexy was lies, huh?”

“First of all, I never called your brain sexy!” Hongjoong was laughing. 

“That’s how it translated in my head!”

And so, the two of you bickered and made fun of each other until you reached the station. You both had only one backpack each with a change of clothes so you were quick and anxious to get out of the train, immediately gasping at the sudden change of scenery.

Sector 7 was everything Sector 8 wasn’t. For starters, the train station was cleaner- no wrappers lying around, no drunkards lining the walls. It was all monochrome and had a retro vibe to it- but then again, Sector 7 was known for leaning towards nature and cleanliness rather than the modern mess which seemed to be your home’s staple. 

“The air feels so… different,” Hongjoong looked at you as you exited, picking a stray leaf from your hair. “Everything smells… cleaner.”

“Definitely,” you took a deep breath. “I can feel my lungs opening. I can’t believe how suffocating our hometown is. Maybe I should have moved here instead of Sector 1- at least I could have come back healthier.”

Hongjoong laughed. “Sector 1 really wasn’t much different from Sector 8, huh?”

“Yep,” you scoffed, looking at your phone for all the book cafes in Sector 7. “Just more modern and messier. Also, you should have taken a photo of the name of the cafe, Hongjoong. Really would have saved us the trip.”

“We have time to kill, don’t we?” Hongjoong shrugged, smiling. “Besides, how many book cafes could there be in one sector?”

An astonishing five was the answer. It seemed like the people here had a thing for book cafes. Sector 7 was the smallest sector but it had more book cafes than any other sector. And since it was a hilly area, you couldn’t rule out your options, and Hongjoong’s photos of the inside of the cafe weren’t helping much, though you did rank the cafes from the most probable to the least before marking the route on the map before taking the bus to get dropped off at the foot of one of the two hills that had two cafes.

“Better be one of them,” you sighed, looking up- the hill looked smaller in the photos on the internet. “That’s quite a hike.”

“I hope it’ll be worth it,” Hongjoong was mirroring your position. 

“Shush. We’re having fun whether we find something or not. That’s the plan, remember?” You smiled and he took your hand, squeezing it before following you up to the trail. 

Though the first cafe had a similar interior to the one you could see from the few pictures Hongjoong had, you decided it wasn’t the one after surveying. You did grab coffee to go and decided to rest before hiking up. You were checking your group chat with Yunho and Mingi which made you scoff internally- they were being wild.

Mingi: I hope you’re having… ‘fun’.

Yunho: Let’s not disturb her today hehehe

“What’s so funny?” Hongjoong snickered. “You know you can laugh.”

You let out the laugh you had been holding. “Just Yunho and Mingi. They can get weird sometimes, especially in our group chat.”

“Tell me about it,” Hongjoong scoffed. “We have a group chat of 6 and boy, does it get crazy. I keep them on mute.”

“Is that the one with Seonghwa? He seems… mature.”

“Mature?” Hongjoong laughed. “To you, maybe. He’s still a kid.”

You noticed how Hongjoong was smiling. “You adore him.”

“I don’t,” Hongjoong didn’t sound convincing and you shrugged. “Okay, yeah, of course I do.”

“See, that wasn’t too hard,” you stretched your limbs. “I adore Yunho and Mingi too- at times when the desire to kill them is less stronger.”

“Yeah, that’s more relatable,” Hongjoong agreed, finishing his coffee. “Do you think… if we knew each other, and one of our friends knew about us… they didn’t tell us on purpose?”

You looked at him- that was something you had discussed on your train ride too but it seemed like the possibility stayed with him. “Isn’t Seonghwa your closest friend? Has he done anything to make you feel like that could actually be a possibility? Because I was just rambling on the train-”

“I don’t know,” Hongjoong sighed, leaning forward and watching his shoes stick in the grass. He recalled the time when he found you at his place during dinner with the boys. Seonghwa had, just for a moment, looked at Hongjoong like he had found something he wasn’t supposed to find though he had been pretty normal later- a bit too normal, if he could admit. “I don’t know how I’ll feel if that’s the case.”

You took Hongjoong’s hand in yours, tracing his fingers. “You have cute hands.”

“Shut up,” he laughed. 

“No, really,” you laughed back, taking a deep breath. “Seonghwa seems like someone who genuinely cares about you. Even if he did that, which is a possibility I’m not actually entertaining, but even if he didn’t tell you about this on purpose… I’m sure he had his reasons, Hongjoong. He wouldn’t do anything to hurt you, right? He’s been your friend for like a decade, just like Yunho and Mingi with me, right?”

Hongjoong nodded. “If Yunho and Mingi did that to you, would you hate them?”

“I don’t think I can ever hate them. That’s how it is with friends,” you squeezed his hand. “I won’t hate anyone after finding out the truth. Maybe the only person I’ll hate is myself.”

“You should be kind to yourself,” Hongjoong almost whispered, turning towards you. “I believe you, you know. Even if we find out nothing today, even if the dots don’t connect… I believe in you.”

You couldn’t help it. You couldn’t help watching his eyes sparkle like there were more worlds to explore than the one you were in. You couldn’t help but not smile when he did, when his face shifted into warmth and loveliness, so you went ahead and pecked his lips, lingering a bit before you drew back, clearly having surprised him. Before you could regret the decision and maybe apologise, Hongjoong was cupping your face with one hand and bringing you forward to meet his lips in a proper kiss and after you recovered from the shock, you were kissing him back with equal enthusiasm, ditching your coffee to fist his shirt as you brought him closer. 

“Shit,” Hongjoong breathed as he broke the kiss, shaking his head in amusement. “You’re gonna be the death of me.”

You grinned, pulling him closer for the dramatics. “You can always back out.”

“Nah, I’m enjoying this,” Hongjoong cupped your face in both hands this time as he kissed you and you were amazed, blown by how good he was at kissing. He knew what exactly to do and you were submitting to him. You only pulled apart when you heard the faint sound of passersby but he finished with a peck to your cheek, tucking your hair behind your ear.

You stifled a smile, suddenly shy, watching him straighten his clothes and hair and when he was done, he looked at you. “Done staring?”

“Nope,” you muttered, continuing to watch him as he picked up both your cups and threw them in the trash can. “I’ve suddenly forgotten what we were supposed to do.”

“We’re hiking up, hello?” Hongjoong snapped his fingers in front of you and you came to your senses. He extended his hand and you took it, helping you get up. “Done already?��

“Done for,” you teased as you elbowed him, making him grin. “You should know that this was supposed to be a platonic investigation trip.”

“We can make it a romantic mystery trip,” Hongjoong suggested.

“Gosh, you sound cheesy,” you made a face and he laughed. “No wonder you’ve been single for so long. Whoever would tolerate such cheesiness?”

“Says you!” Hongjoong scoffed. “When’s the last time you dated?”

“Oops,” you flinched. “Does the imaginary blue haired boy count? Pretty sure I’m dating him…”

“You can’t two-time on me,” Hongjoong narrowed his eyes.

“Whatever. He’s prettier,” you mumbled.

“You don’t even know what he looks like!”

And somehow, with the constant teasing and bickering (and a few kisses exchanged to prove a few points), you were outside the second cafe- Cafe Crescent. With folded arms, you scanned the exterior- all wood and greens, and then looked at the view it provided with the outdoor sitting- you could see the majority of Sector 7 from this point of the hill.

“Pretty cool. We should have lunch here, what do you say?” You asked.

“Yep, definitely. I don’t think I can tolerate the sound of your growling stomach anymore…”

“I should just friendzone you,” you decided before urging him to follow you, ignoring his chuckles. Once you stepped inside though, you both automatically shut up.

“This has to be it,” Hongjoong was the first one to say. You agreed, and you placed your orders before surveying the inside, pretending to look at the books that lined one whole wall. There was a variety of genres that made you pleased.

“We have the more recent books in the back too,” one of the staff pointed. “Along with a photobooth, if you’re up for it.”

“Thank you,” you smiled and you two decided to eat first, in case you would lose your appetite later.

And you were right about that. After you finished eating, which was quick since you two were silent eaters, you went to the back, wowing- the back was more pastels, just like in the photos that Hongjoong had. There were two large bookshelves and some couches and the smell of coffee in the air just made it perfect. 

“I like it here,” you mumbled, scanning the shelves and scoffing when you found your own book there. “Hongjoong? Do you wanna see my book?”

“Your book is here?” Hongjoong wowed. “That’s nice.”

“There it is,” you picked it out. Hongjoong had already read your book before he knew you so he was quite surprised when he found out you were a published writer. You opened the first page and smiled to yourself- the nostalgia was strong with this one. 

“Let me see,” Hongjoong asked and you gave him the book, which he was skimming through as you went to the photobooth and saw several polaroids stuck to a softboard- of tourists, probably. You were looking at them when you felt Hongjoong tap your shoulder.

“Uhh, you might want to see this.”

You leaned forward to see what he was pointing at, surprised to find a doodle with your signature- a blue haired boy and a girl that looked an awful lot like you.

“Only I would dare to doodle in my own book, huh?” You muttered as you took the book, inspecting it closely. You skimmed through the rest of the pages, finding a few words that were highlighted in blue. “I think I should sit down and see what the random highlighted parts are about.”

“Sure, I’ll look for another book if they have,” Hongjoong offered and you nodded. Hongjoong asked the staff if they had more works or copies by that author, but it seemed like the one in your hand was the only copy they had, so he sat with you and you noted every highlighted word that came in random intervals, noticing that sometimes a single letter was highlighted as well.

It took about half an hour- and complaining about the length of your own book- when Hongjoong had the words down and he stared at the long note in confusion. 

“Forget… do… not… love… you… one… the… and what’s with these letters?”

“Do not forget the one you love?” You translated for him and he wowed. 

“You’re quick.”

“Let me see this,” you took the note from him, working on arranging the rest of the message while he fidgeted in nervousness and by the time you were done, you were looking at Hongjoong in disbelief, passing him the note to read.

“Do not forget the one you love. Your mind may forget but your heart will remember. If there is one memory you could keep it is of him. Ignorance is bliss.”

“Does this make sense to you?” Hongjoong asked, noticing the unarranged letters. “And what’s this?”

“Go ahead and figure it out. It’s an anagram.”

Hongjoong stared at the jumbled letters for barely a few seconds before he looked at you. “That’s… my name.”

“Kim Hongjoong,” you pursed your lips. “You are my blue haired boy.”

“Wait- hold up,” he stared at the note, feeling his heart sink. “It doesn’t make any sense- I… what does this mean?”

“It means I might have to look closer than I thought,” you got up, going to the softboard glancing at the polaroids. “Where would I hide something I wouldn’t want to forget? In plain sight. I might have to look through my room again, and I think you should too.”

“But,” Hongjoong stood next to you with the note in his hand. “If we knew each other, why have we forgotten?”

“Ignorance is bliss,” you quoted. “I think we’re not supposed to remember each other for some strange reason.”

“And the biggest question- how did we forget? The both of us?” He sighed. “It just… doesn’t make any sense.”

“It’s as confusing for you as it is for me,” you noticed a polaroid peeking from behind another photo- the only one not on display in the entire board. “But…” you said as you leaned forward and unpinned that photo, not expecting to see two familiar faces in the photo behind. “I… think we have concrete proof now.”

The photo was a selfie of Hongjoong in blue hair with you sporting bangs that you had some two or three years ago. Hongjoong looked at you in disbelief and then at the photo- it looked like he had a hard time processing all of this. He handed you the photo and muttered something about getting air, leaving you inside the cafe. 

You stared at the photo- it was taken at this very photobooth, and dated the same as the pictures Hongjoong had. Hongjoong and you were cheek to cheek, grinning like idiots. Idiots in love, you thought, smiling to yourself despite the absurdity of the situation. You turned the polaroid, not surprised to see your writing on it. 

“To the love that I may forget, I hope we find each other again. 

P.S.: Contact Lee Sunmi.”

The name sounded familiar and you wondered where you had heard of it before. You put the photo in your pocket and took your and Hongjoong’s stuff, placed your book back on the shelf and found Hongjoong sitting on a bench at the edge of the hill, wiping his face. You could understand how he felt- you had been entertaining so many possibilities for a while now, but he probably hadn’t thought it could be real- and the fact that he was involved in this and had forgotten you too…

You joined him on the bench, staring ahead at the sun setting. You let a few minutes of comfortable silence pass before you showed him the backside of the polaroid. 

“I knew you were familiar from the moment I saw you. I have never, ever opened up to someone in such a short amount of time as I did with you. And I think it’s because it was so easy,” Hongjoong said, “It was so easy being with you. As if I had known you for a long time.”

You nodded, scooting closer and then hesitating. “You can back out, Hongjoong. If you don’t want to learn the rest of the truth-”

“No- I want to. I want to remember you, y/n,” he looked at you, his hair falling over his eyes. “I want to know why I had to forget someone I loved. I want to know who it was that took me to Sector 7, who took me places I don’t remember going, who made me create music that I don’t remember composing. I want to know why I woke up one day and felt like something had been snatched from me.”

“You don’t know if you loved me, though,” you smiled. “You could have hated me.”

“I think I’m sure,” he smiled back, eyes glazed. “I wouldn’t be taking a picture this close with someone I hated,” he waved the photo and you laughed. 

“Well then,” you shivered as a cold crept up your spine. “Do you think us meeting again was fate or a planned coincidence?”

“I’d like to find that out, too,” he sighed, taking your hand. “I know it said ‘ignorance is bliss’ and we might be diving into something dangerous because let’s face it- who possesses the power to wipe memories? That’s insane and the only two things I can come up with are both realistic and bullshit.”

“The government, realistically, or something supernatural, which might be bullshit?” You asked.

“Exactly,” he took a deep breath. “You’re a writer. I’m a producer. Have we ever worked for the government?”

“Not that I know of…”

“And are we interesting enough to the supernatural?” Hongjoong made a ridiculous face. “I don’t think so.”

“Maybe I am,” you pouted.

“Shut up,” Hongjoong laughed. “Either way, let’s explore the realistic option first, even though it might be less probable than a supernatural event…”

“Look who’s talking crazy,” you grinned. “You’re turning into me!”

“I need a detox day after this trip,” Hongjoong said and you elbowed him. “Who’s this Lee Sunmi anyway?”

“Let’s look into that first,” you said and he agreed.

—----------------------------

Everything had changed, yet it felt like you were fitting into each other like a puzzle long forgotten.

You both had decided not to tell any of your friends for two reasons- the obvious one being that the situation was unbelievably ridiculous, and second… the gnawing fear that they knew all along and were pretending.

You both had no idea who Lee Sunmi was and you couldn’t risk asking people so you decided to work this out at a tolerable pace- visit places together in hopes that you’d get your memory or fragments of it back, visiting each other’s place and going through old photos together- you were together in none of them.

Visiting Hongjoong’s apartment was an experience- it didn’t rock any memory nor did it feel familiar, but it was just a strange feeling visiting your boyfriend’s apartment for what was the first time but wasn’t really. He told you that he practically lived in his studio at the place he worked so you should probably visit that. 

For Hongjoong, he found your apartment unusually familiar. He hadn’t recalled much from his past, and he was afraid that his memories would get mixed up with what he would be conjuring up in his head now. He was relying more on you who often got dreams but you both decided not to believe everything you dreamt of. So when Hongjoong stepped in your apartment and nostalgia hit him like a truck, he had to pause and take a seat.

“I think I know what your room looks like,” he looked at you. 

“You could have just said you wanted to see my room, but that’s okay too,” you teased and he rolled his eyes, following you into your room. 

“I… expected it to be more coherent and organised, I’ll admit-”

“You’re not wrong,” you told him. “I woke up one day to this-” you motioned around. “Like, look at this,” you showed him the softboard which had a few notes of your current work in progress and a few photos. “I’ve always created patterns- in colours, or sizes, or shapes. This looks like I stuck things wherever I found space.”

“Something I would do,” Hongjoong grinned. “So that was your first clue that something was wrong? I would have dismissed it as being high.”

“Yes, that was my first concrete clue,” you glared at him. “And turns out I was right. I also have this draft here,” you pulled your chair and made Hongjoong sit on it in front of the pc while you opened the document standing near him. “The narration I told you about, practically hidden in plain sight. I have no memory of writing it- and no, I don’t write when I’m ‘high’.”

“I believe you,” he placed a hand around your waist casually to assure you, though it sent butterflies in your stomach. You took a breath before showing him the clues in the document. 

“It sounds like a plot for a crime novel, I know, but my life’s been starting to feel like that too. This is practically my villain origin story- I’m one step closer to losing it everyday.”

“Me too,” Hongjoong mumbled, skimming through it and frowning. “But this isn’t as unbelievable as it looks. I work in KQ entertainment, right? One of its subsidiaries had rumours of trainees going missing but there was never any concrete evidence to prove the case.”

“Really?” You frowned. “So if what I wrote is true, I was a spy hired to investigate that? But I’m not a spy, and even if I somehow managed to get that job, how come I forgot everything?”

Hongjoong shifted towards you, his hand travelling down your arm absently as he looked up at you. “If it was just one of us, it could have been an accident, but it’s the both of us, apparently. Which means, somehow I was involved. Was I a spy too? Were we rivals? Did you get close to me to access the industry-”

“Which is the plot of every other movie these days,” you laughed. “But I wouldn’t have been dumb enough to start an actual relationship with you if that was the case. I would have just seduced you-”

“Hey!”

“For a one night stand or something,” you laughed. “Come on. I wouldn’t make a dumb spy!”

“And how exactly would you have managed to seduce me?” Hongjoong’s voice was dangerously low as he asked, pulling you towards him and you put a hand on his shoulder to hold steady. “I’d like a demonstration.”

“I think you are easily seducible- you did approach me on the train first,” you teased.

“Yeah. I totally found your half sleeping figure the sexiest,” Hongjoong made a face and you slapped his shoulder, grinning. You trailed a finger along his face, from the temple down to the jaw, tracing it until you reached his chin and tilted it up, making him face you properly. 

“You were saying?” You asked, letting your finger trail down his throat, down to the collar to draw circles on whatever skin you could see. You met his eyes and found his eyes glazed with something unrecognisable and it was almost too much- god, the way he sometimes looked at you. You could feel your entire heart sinking into your stomach. 

“Don’t look at me like that,” you tilted his face so he could stop looking at you but he held your hand. 

“Like what?” He pulled you over him, making you sit on his lap. “Like this?”

He was perfect. His black and white hair was the most perfect mess you had seen and you couldn’t resist the urge to run your hands through his hair, finding it incredibly soft. His hands found home at your waist and when he hooked his thumbs under your shirt, you shut your eyes for a second, relishing the feeling.

“You make me feel overwhelmed when you look at me like that,” you admitted. “Not in a bad way, not at all, but… it feels like-”

“I look at you like I’m in love, don’t I?” He asked, leaning into your touch as you caressed his face. “I look at you like I’m falling in love all over again. Because I am.”

“Hongjoong,” you almost groaned but he shook his head.

“You look at me like that sometimes too,” he kissed your palm. “Like you’ve known and loved me all your life. I love it when you look at me like that.”

You kissed him then, to tell him he was right. He was absolutely right- you had loved the blue haired boy even when you had forgotten him. And when you had met Hongjoong, you had felt like he was the one. His hands on your waist tightened as he kissed you back, slowly, trying to understand everything you were saying through the kiss. And when you broke the kiss, lingering before drawing back, Hongjoong was chuckling.

“I don’t think you’re capable of mere seduction, y/n. You’re capable of making people fall for you.”

“Are you saying I suck at seducing?” You challenged, pushing him back into the seat and surprising him before putting your arms around his neck and kissing him differently this time- more passionate, more hot, more rushed and Hongjoong’s hands travelling all over your body only fueled you into sitting right on top of him and moving to the rhythm of your kiss, grinding on him until he moaned into the kiss.

“What do you have to say now?” You broke the kiss, laughing but Hongjoong had picked you up, making you squeal. He placed you on the bed gently, a devilish calm in his eyes as he pushed you back, drawing on top of you ever slowly and trading open mouthed kisses before travelling down your neck and taking his sweet time, making you whimper but you couldn’t move. He had your wrists pinned on the sides.

“Hongjoong,” you groaned and he changed character, planting gentle kisses up your neck to your cheek.

“You good?” He asked.

“Never better,” you smiled and he smirked, drawing back to push his rolled sleeves back, licking his lips. 

“What am I gonna do with you, y/n?” He ran a hand through his hair, scanning you. 

“What are you gonna do?” You asked naively.

Hongjoong narrowed his eyes. “What did the intelligence agency ever see in you to hire you as their spy?”

“Maybe I seduced my way there,” you joked and he laughed, putting a finger over your lips. 

“No more talk about seduction for the rest of the night,” he was right in front of you and found himself tracing your lips. You brought him closer for a kiss and soon you were on top of him, his hands under your shirt as you two made out, gasping into the kiss when he pushed himself on you, making you feel everything. You were going to take off your shirt when you paused, eyes widening in realisation.

“Hongjoong! The intelligence agency- Wonderland Intelligence Agency!”

“God, you scared me,” Hongjoong put his hands on his face. “What about it?”

“Lee Sunmi- I have a card somewhere,” you got up from top of him and started searching frantically around the room, leaving Hongjoong confused but he watched you in amusement as you tried searching for whatever business card you had.

“For someone so organised, you sure know where you put the business cards,” Hongjoong commented and you ignored him- where had you put it? You moved to the table and looked into the pencil holder, scoffing.

“Aha!” You waved it in front of him, walking back to the bed. “I found this in my pocket on our first date. Remember the woman we bumped into that day we went to the concert?”

Hongjoong looked at the business card. “How do you know it was her? I don’t remember her passing you this.”

“I’m guessing it’s her- I always put my hands in my pockets and I had empty ones when I left that day. When she went inside, she patted my shoulder like this. She must have slipped this inside then.”

“Wow,” Hongjoong sat up a little. “This does have her email, but can we contact her? Can we trust her?”

“She recognised us, didn’t she?” You asked him and he nodded slowly. “It sure looked like she did. She didn’t like seeing us together.”

“Yeah, I remember that. I say we should take the risk for some answers?”

“Not right now- I’ll need to do some research on your company,” you bit your lip. 

“Not my company, the subsidiary- they separated from us some two years ago, I think. That’s the last I heard of them.”

“That’s good,” you nodded, letting Hongjoong caress your hand as you processed all of this. “So let’s just… relax?”

Hongjoong laughed, pulling you closer, back on top of him. “I love it when your eyes light up like that- when you connect the dots.”

You went back to a memory- the blue haired Hongjoong caressing your hand, the two of you on what looked like a bus and he whispered something in your ear.

You smiled. “You’ve told me that before, Hongjoong.”

“Yeah, earlier?”

“No, before,” you kissed him. “You held my hand just like this and you told me that you loved it when my eyes lit up when I connected the dots.” You kissed him again, resting your forehead against his chest, half seated. 

Hongjoong was running his hand through your hair when he realised you were shaking. He squeezed your shoulders before drawing you back, wiping your silent tears. “Hey, what’s wrong?”

You took a deep breath, feeling utterly broken in the moment, feeling like Hongjoong was holding all your broken pieces in his hands. “I don’t like this, Hongjoong. I don’t like it that I forgot you. I don’t want to know why I did- I feel like it’s going to be something that’s going to break us. It's been chasing me all day long, all night long- I feel so lost.”

“It’s okay,” he kissed your forehead, hugging you and rocking you back and forth. “I know what it feels like. But y/n… I feel like we won’t find peace until we find the truth, no matter how bitter it is. And I know we’d like to think that the past won’t affect us now, but it will. So let’s just enjoy what we have now, huh? If it’s too much, we can stop.”

“No, you’re right,” you sniffed, wiping your face. “I’m just afraid to lose you again.”

Hongjoong smiled at that, finding it unbelievable that you two didn’t remember losing each other but knew exactly how it felt like- in your hearts. “I don’t want to lose you. I can’t,” he caressed your face. “I don’t think I can stay away from you no matter what the truth is.”

You let him kiss you then, throwing the card away- that could wait. For now, you were going to let Hongjoong make you forget about all your fears, make them dissolve with each kiss, each touch. 

—---------------------

Hongjoong regretted setting up a date to meet with Lee Sunmi.

Over the past few days, while he had been working on getting more information on the subsidiary company that went under investigation, called AG Entertainment, he had only found speculative articles on the internet about the missing trainees but nothing concrete. He was mostly letting you create theories about what could have happened but it wasn’t enough. And then one day, Seonghwa asked Hongjoong how his relationship was going.

Hongjoong had to do a double-take. It was a casual question, yes, but these days he was doubting everyone and everything.

“It’s… good. It’s great, actually,” Hongjoong laughed a bit. “You’ve met her a few times, right? Do you like her?”

Seonghwa had never been good at hiding his emotions and the way his eyes flashed, Hongjoong knew in his gut that he was aware of something. “Yeah, she’s…. Nice, I guess. A bit weird at times but we all are.”

“We all are,” Hongjoong agreed. “When I’m with her, it sometimes feels like I’ve known her for longer.”

Seonghwa raised a brow at that. “That’s… that must mean you’re good for each other.”

“She said she feels like it too- like she’s known me for a long time, like we’ve met before,” Hongjoong continued, watching Seonghwa fidget with the pen in his hand. “I suppose with some people, it’s like that, right?”

“Yeah, I suppose so,” Seonghwa agreed, getting up from the table. “I’m heading out to get some groceries. You’re working?”

“Yeah,” Hongjoong watched him get his things and just when he was about to leave, he stopped him. 

“You won’t hide anything from me, right?” Hongjoong asked and he saw realisation cross across his face. “Just tell me if you’re hiding something from me. Because no matter what I think, I believe you wouldn’t hide it from me unless you had a big enough reason to. Bigger than our friendship.”

“That’s right,” Seonghwa patted Hongjoong’s shoulder. “I would only hide something from you if it meant more than our friendship.”

That was all the confirmation Hongjoong needed. He nodded, smiling in appreciation. “Thanks, Seonghwa. I’m glad you’re my friend.”

“I’m glad you trust me,” Seonghwa smiled back, nodding slowly as he processed. “I hope you find what you’re looking for, Hongjoong. I really do. It may be dangerous, but… I hope you do.”

With that, Seonghwa left and Hongjoong wondered just what he meant by that. 

And somehow, one thing led to another and he found himself in the same cafe that he went to, on his first date with you, now waiting for who was supposed to be an intelligence agent. He hadn’t dared to send a mail or anything, no. He just thought he would come and check if this was Lee Sunmi’s regular coffee stop.

It looked like it was. Just around that time in the evening when he was expecting her, she came dressed in a suit, and Hongjoong watched her get coffee. When she turned, she met eyes with Hongjoong, almost ignoring him until she saw that he was maintaining eye contact on purpose. Hongjoong raised his hand to confirm that he was waiting for her and he watched her sigh and look around before walking to him.

“This isn’t a safe spot to talk. Get in my car.”

“And I’m supposed to follow you?” Hongjoong asked and she smirked.

“You did wait for me. It’s up to you, Kim Hongjoong.”

Hongjoong shook his head at that, asking her to lead the way and she started driving. She let a few minutes pass before she asked what he wanted with her.

“First of all, why did you slip your card into y/n’s coat?”

“I saw you both together, after years,” Sunmi smiled. “I was quite shocked. It didn’t look like you both recognised me, though.”

“We didn’t,” Hongjoong confirmed. “What do you mean ‘after years’? When was the last time you saw us together?”

“A year ago,” she said, making a turn to the left.

“When was the first time you saw us together?”

“Two years ago,” she answered. 

“So are you going to tell me what this is about, or should I just ask questions?” Hongjoong asked, sighing as he slumped back, wondering how to steer this conversation. 

“Does y/n know you’re here, Hongjoong?” Sunmi asked and Hongjoong looked at her, not answering. “That means you must have recalled something that you couldn’t tell her.”

“I’m not actually sure if what I recall is a memory or just my imagination,” Hongjoong sighed. What he recalled a few days ago wasn’t a pretty memory. It was ugly, with a certain someone pointing a gun at him.

Sunmi drove to a park, stopping her car and reaching into the back to get some documents from her backseat pocket. “I started keeping this here in case I ran across one of you. It’s the ugly truth and how it started. I can give it to you, but… it’s not yours. It’s y/n’s truth. If I give it to you it will only create misunderstandings.”

“Then just tell me… how was I involved in all of this?”

That night, Hongjoong didn’t come home. Sunmi had assured her it wasn’t the whole truth and was just what the WIS, specifically her who was in charge of this case, could tell him without violating your privacy. To him, it was a bit too much to process. He sat in front of the river all night, arranging his thoughts.

Y/n. Writer. Spy. AG Entertainment. Human trafficking. Government involved. Hiding the truth. Memory wipe.

And all he could conclude was that he was involved because he was in the wrong place at the wrong time. 

It was your mission. Only you had to forget- and only about the mission. Somehow, he had found out, which had created a mess. How did he know you? Did you really approach him because of your mission? Unfortunately, Sunmi did not have the answer for that.

The next day, when you woke up, you sighed when you checked your phone and Hongjoong hadn’t even read your messages. This wasn’t new, though. He had been a bit distant for a few days, and you wondered if it was just because he needed a break.

Or you feared that it could be because he recalled something bad. Because you knew whatever happened, it must have ended in a tragedy. If you and Hongjoong were in love, having to forget each other was a tragedy- and you still didn’t have the answers. 

You fiddled with the business card of the WIS agent. Could you contact her now? What would you even ask her? Would she even tell you, or would she make you forget everything again? Was this a test, her slipping the card so you would call her, so she could wipe your memories again? You had no idea. And with Hongjoong not responding to any of your messages from the past whole day, you were worried.

You asked Mingi for Seonghwa’s number and texted him if he knew where Hongjoong was, but his reply made you worry- he hadn’t been responding to him either, and he wasn’t at the studio yesterday. Apparently Seonghwa had stopped by Hongjoong’s place last night, but he wasn’t home and Seonghwa assumed that he was with you. 

You told him that you would stop by his place today. You still had time before you needed to clock in for work, so you made a stop at Hongjoong’s apartment, but he wasn’t there. 

“Just let me know if you’re safe. Seonghwa is worried too.”

With that, you went back home and absorbed yourself in your work, forgetting about everything for a while- maybe he was just taking a breather. It would be understandable.

That night, Seonghwa got a call from Hongjoong, asking if he could stop by his place. Seonghwa asked Hongjoong if he had let you know that he was alright, but he hadn’t. So with a text to you that Hongjoong was back home and presumably alright, Seonghwa stopped by his place with chicken and beer.

“Ah, just what I needed,” Hongjoong said when he opened the door and Seonghwa smiled. “Not you, obviously. The chicken and beer.”

“Right,” Seonghwa rolled his eyes. “You look like a mess.”

“I feel like shit, yes, thank you for noticing,” Hongjoong slumped down on the couch, watching Seonghwa set the table. When he was done, he looked up at him.

“Are we gonna talk?”

Hongjoong told him everything then- starting from the day he met you at the train to his meeting with the WIS agent. By the time he was done talking, Seonghwa had to take a few minutes himself. 

“I never thought it was that deep,” Seonghwa phew-ed. “But you’ve got most of it wrong, Hongjoong.”

“What do you mean?”

“With the story you have, you must believe y/n is the bad person here.”

“Well, she did point a gun at me,” Hongjoong shivered. “She threatened to kill Jaebeom too- you remember him. He was my supervisor at that time.”

“He worked with AG Entertainment, and if he was involved in the whole trafficking business… he must be in prison now.”

“Well then, her business was with him, right?” Hongjoong frowned. “Why involve me?”

“You really think she approached you on purpose?” Seonghwa scoffed. “Didn’t you say that agent saw you both together some two years ago? You and y/n first met more than three years ago, Hongjoong.”

Now that had Hongjoong’s full attention. “How do you know that?”

“Because I’m the one who introduced you to her, you fool,” Seonghwa threw a pillow at him and Hongjoong let it hit him. Was he hearing this right? 

“So you’re telling me,” Hongjoong shifted towards him fully. “That we might have known each other before that job?”

“Yes,” Seonghwa nodded. “The agent saw you two together two years ago. She didn’t tell you when she approached y/n, so there’s that. And since I introduced you both, I’m pretty sure she wanted nothing to do with musicians and producers at that time.”

“Wow,” Hongjoong sighed deeply. “How did we meet?”

Seonghwa smiled, telling him about the time Wooyoung hosted a party and invited a bunch of people from town. Knowing Wooyoung, half the sector was present. Wooyoung and you were high school classmates so that’s how Seonghwa got to know you, and while they had been chatting at the party, Seonghwa had introduced you to Hongjoong, knowing you two would get along. “I had no idea you two would get along that well. You both ditched the party and went ice skating or something. You came back with bruises but you were lovestruck.”

Hongjoong pursed his lips, trying to wrack his brain for any sort of a flashback but he got none. He buried his head between his knees, sighing. “I just wish I can remember it all, Seonghwa. I feel it in my heart that I’ve loved her for a long time, yet… there’s also this sense of dread that’s stuck with me.”

“I think you didn’t know about y/n’s job, and you must have felt betrayed, that’s why,” Seonghwa thought. “Think about y/n too. If she got this job without knowing you were involved… she might have found herself in a situation with no way to get out. A number of possibilities and since your memory is coming back, I know you two will be fine and will sort things out. What I don’t understand, Hongjoong, is why the mind-wiping was necessary.”

“Sunmi only told me that it was because the government got directly involved, but I don’t know what that means,” Hongjoong looked up. “They could have signed a confidentiality agreement or something. Were we test subjects? Because I remember that the mind-wiping thing wasn’t an actual possibility until a few years ago.”

“That’s why I said it’s dangerous to dig,” Seonghwa started cleaning the table. “It’s fine if you stick with just finding out about your relationship without digging into the matter. What if they do something again?”

“Why did they not wipe your memory then? Or y/n’s friends?”

“Yunho and Mingi were studying in Sector 1 back then, so I’m not sure how much they know. It looks like they don’t know about you being her boyfriend but they’re aware y/n dated. As for me… I had to sign a confidentiality agreement with Ms. Lee. I wasn’t in the equation until I noticed how you forgot about y/n one day entirely. I noticed someone following you and somehow met with Ms. Lee who explained a bit and let me go because apparently, the situation had already gotten a bit out of control and she didn’t want to risk any more people. She also said that unless the memories came back naturally, which she hoped would happen soon, trying to force these memories might cause brain damage.”

“Wow,” Hongjoong blinked. “Brain damage. Just what I needed.”

“Hey,” Seonghwa slapped his arm. “Your memories are coming back naturally, so just relax.”

“I don’t know how to face y/n though,” Hongjoong hid his face in his hands. “I went behind her back because of that memory and met with Sunmi. We promised to share whatever memory we could recall, yet I couldn’t tell her this. And I don’t know if I’m sure about what happened between us.”

“Maybe, like Lee Sunmi said, you should talk it out with y/n and meet with the agent to get the documents on what happened. Then connect the dots.”

Hongjoong agreed but all he could think of right now was your smile fading when you would learn what he had done.

—---------------------

Two more days had passed with Hongjoong not showing up, only a text from Seonghwa to assure you that he was alright and just needed some time to himself, and the last thing you were expecting anymore was to find a package on the door that contained documents from Lee Sunmi.

Your first instinct was to tell Hongjoong, but you had some qualms about that now. You understood that Hongjoong needed space and you were almost sure he had recalled some memory which had caused the sudden rift between you two, which made you wonder just how bad it was. Well, if the government was involved, it must have been bad. 

You had recalled a lot of memories too in the past few days. You recalled meeting Hongjoong at a party where apparently, Seonghwa introduced you two. You remembered that party- it was more than three years ago. So you thought that there was a chance that Seonghwa knew about you two all along and Hongjoong had found out about it. It was why you let the boys have their space- perhaps they were sorting things out.

You also recalled the first time you saw Hongjoong at his workplace and you hid out of instinct- you hadn’t realised that he was involved in your mission. You hadn’t realised that AG and KQ Entertainment were connected- Hongjoong worked at KQ, and you had forgotten. You had gotten yourself in a mess. You remembered that now. 

So when you saw the document from Sunmi, you wondered if Hongjoong should be present. What if the truth was really, really ugly? What if, after learning everything, Hongjoong wouldn’t want to be with you anymore?

With that fear in your heart, you mustered up the courage to open the document and empty its contents- a letter, a file and a USB. you opened the letter first and read its content:

Hongjoong has learned his truth. It’s time that you learn yours. I’m sorry for all that went wrong with this mission, and I’m sorry for involving you both. I hope you and Hongjoong can learn the entire truth and learn from it, and find in your heart forgiveness and love. Sincerely, Sunmi.

Hongjoong had learned ‘his’ truth? Had he met with Sunmi? You scoffed in disbelief- he was avoiding you on purpose. You wondered what happened to the promise you two made about sharing each memory you would recall and going through this together. 

You decided to go through the file first- it had basic information on you, on why you were selected, what the mission was, and what exactly had happened. Surprisingly, it had no information on why Hongjoong was involved, and after reading the whole thing and going through the USB, heart pounding wildly as you went through everything that had something of Hongjoong in it- old video files, audio files, even Hongjoong’s data- after that, you didn’t need any more answers.

You remembered exactly what went wrong with that mission- and it wasn’t about the case you were investigating. It was about Hongjoong.

That night, you couldn’t sleep. Your waking hours were all filled with your memories coming back, fragment by fragment, head throbbing crazily. You were so dizzy that you didn’t remember calling Seonghwa- you don’t know why you called him, but it felt like he was the only person you wouldn’t need to explain anything to. A few minutes later, you opened the door to Seonghwa. 

“Shit, y/n, you look like a mess.”

“I feel like shit, yes,” you confirmed, brushing your clothes, and he laughed to himself, recalling how Hongjoong had said the same things. “Do come in. Did you bring some painkillers?”

“You should eat something first,” Seonghwa looked around your house- he had been there before, but he wasn’t sure you recalled it yet. “If you have ramen, I can make some killer ramen.”

You agreed and watched him go through your kitchen like he knew exactly where everything was. “You know… I never told you where I lived, yet you knew exactly where to come. Pretty sure Hongjoong didn’t tell you my address.”

Seonghwa paused in the middle of cooking, looking back at you. “I don’t know. Maybe Yunho or Mingi did?”

“Come on, you can stop pretending like you don’t know me, Seonghwa,” you laughed out loud, crazily enough that he watched you the whole time until he was laughing along with you. “I don’t know why I forgot you- you were my friend. My… comfort buddy- is that what I called you?”

“Here to pick up both your and Hongjoong’s mess,” he shook his head, taking the ramen off the stove. “You really remember me?”

“We’ve known each other longer than I’ve known Hongjoong,” you said, spreading your arms and he came forward to hug you, rocking you like you remembered he always did. Then you slapped his back harshly, making him wince. “That’s for all that acting you did around me. 100 points for that. You should try a career in that.”

“I couldn’t risk damaging your brain,” Seonghwa pouted. “I’m sorry, though.”

“That’s okay,” you two sat at the table. “I’m sure it was hard for you too.”

“I missed you, I really did,” Seonghwa’s eyes were sincere and you didn’t doubt it. “When I saw you that day at my apartment, I thought you knew everything and came to kill me.”

You laughed. “I didn’t, but I felt like you were involved somehow too. Thanks for being there for Hongjoong though- is he okay?”

“Well… for the most part, yes,” Seonghwa urged you to eat. “Why did you call me?”

“You must remember Sunmi,” you asked and he nodded. “She sent me everything about the case. I remember… everything now, I think. There are some gaps but I have enough for now.”

“Oh,” Seonghwa whistled. “Hongjoong met with her.”

“I knew it,” you nodded. “What does he know?”

“I told him about how you two met,” Seonghwa said and you nodded. “He recalled the day everything went wrong- you pointing a gun at him.”

“Oh god,” you slumped back. “I need a drink.”

“No, you don’t,” Seonghwa scolded. “What exactly happened, y/n?”

“Can you call him here right now?” You asked and Seonghwa looked at you.

“Are you sure?” Seonghwa asked. “Do you want me to leave when he comes?”

“No, I want you to stay, because if you don’t, I might kill him,” you pursed your lips and Seonghwa frowned in confusion. “He’s the one who involved himself, Seonghwa. We were never supposed to forget about our relationship. He just came at the wrong place, wrong time, and he misunderstood everything. He didn’t let me explain anything. He went ahead and told Sunmi he knew everything about the mission, and they talked it through and he made the decision that he wanted to forget about me too. He decided he would forget about me, which meant I had no way of getting my memories back. He stole my choice, Seonghwa.”

Seonghwa stopped eating, watching you finally break apart and bury your head in your arms as you cried your heart out. He let you be for a few moments before he went to sit next to you, rubbing your back. It all made sense to him now. He made you eat the rest of the noodles and take the medicine. 

“You need to sleep it over tonight, y/n,” he insisted. “We can all talk tomorrow.”

“I don’t know,” you were dizzy after all the crying. “I don’t want to be alone anymore.”

“I can call Yunho and Mingi over too. They should know- they’ll help you out a lot, y/n, you really should tell them. They are your best friends, and they still think you made all of that up when you said you were dating.”

You laughed a bit at that. “Might as well have. I don’t know if I can handle telling them everything.”

“I’ll brief them,” he assured you and you nodded. “I’ll ask them to go easy with the questions- I’m sure they’ll have a lot of them.”

“Please,” you groaned, wiping your face. “Can you call them over then?”

Seonghwa nodded. It looked like you weren’t going to get to sleep any time soon. He called the two over, and made you sit in your room while he explained everything, but you felt a bit better so you joined them, letting Seonghwa do the talking. By the time he was done and you showed them the pictures of you and Hongjoong, they looked like they had learned that the world was ending tomorrow.

“I can understand, but at the same time… I got none of this, I’m sorry,” Mingi gave up, getting up and roaming around in the living room and you were almost amused. “First of all, whose genius idea was it to make her a government spy? She can’t even hide when she has a crush!”

“Hey!” You threw the nearest object- your lip balm- at him which he caught. “I did my job right!”

“She was hired because of connections, wasn’t she?” Yunho was going through your file. “Sunmi knew you from when you worked on your book.”

“Ah, no doubt,” Mingi sat down. “She isn’t spy material, just hired because of connections. That makes more sense.”

“She approached me because of the job, read that right,” you kicked Yunho’s leg. “It says my research capabilities from the time I wrote my political crime novel were noteworthy.”

“Whatever,” Yunho mumbled. “I’m going to need 5 business days to process this.”

“And I need 10,” Mingi sighed. “Why did your memories come back?”

“Two reasons,” you said. “Sunmi did a bad job intentionally- she messed with the numbers so her bosses can think it actually happened, but I guess she saved the day. She also thought Hongjoong was making a mistake, because my plan was to go through the mind wipe and have Hongjoong fill in the gaps for me. Sunmi told me I was going to have to forget Hongjoong since he was involved. I think she told me that on purpose- she didn’t like how the government was using us.”

“She’s an angel,” Seonghwa sighed. “Is she safe, though? If the government learns-”

“I think she has leverage,” you thought. “Which is why she sent me all of this. If the world learns that their political leaders were taking advantage of minors who went to AG Entertainment to become trainees… that’s going to destroy Wonderland.”

“I know what your next novel needs to be about,” Mingi scoffed and you shook your head furiously. “You should! It’s going to be like rubbing it on their faces.”

Somehow, the conversation got steered into jokes and teasing, and with that, you found yourself sleeping on the couch, Seonghwa dozed off on the other couch. Yunho and Mingi made sure to take some snaps before they decided to crash on your bed, messing up your room just to annoy you, which they would have an earful about the next day.

Later that day, Hongjoong agreed to meet you by the river- the same place he had gone to. He realised it might have a connection to you too. When he saw you, eyes a bit swollen but still looking pretty, he sighed internally before walking to you.

“Hey,” he pursed his lips, not knowing how to greet you.

“Hey yourself,” you scanned him. “You ghosted me for days.”

“I’m sorry,” he sighed, sitting next to you on the bench. “I shouldn’t have.”

“You shouldn’t have a lot of things, Hongjoong,” you started. “Are you ready to hear the whole truth? Or do you still believe what you know is the entire truth?”

That was a jab but Hongjoong thought he deserved it after all. And then he heard you out. How you had met Sunmi through your crime novel. How she made you a job offer that had none of the memory wiping in the contract. How you were supposed to befriend Jaebeom, the producer from AG Entertainment and get access into the building and investigate. It was when you and Hongjoong had dated for a year already. You had no idea how KQ and AG were connected, and Hongjoong hadn’t taken you to his studio yet. How he did take you to his studio and it was the first time you two had taken things so far.

“Do you remember that, Hongjoong?” You asked with a faint smile. “I always said you looked hot when you worked.”

“I remember that,” Hongjoong wiped his eyes. “You were so beautiful that day, y/n.”

“You were my first, and you were quite good at it, frankly,” you said and you two laughed for the old time’s sake. “I never knew studio sex could be this hot.”

“Please, you knew exactly what you were getting yourself into,” Hongjoong laughed and you slapped his arm playfully. 

“I wish we only had these happy memories to remember,” you sighed after a few moments. “When I saw you at AG, do you have any idea how shocked I was? Do you have any idea what went through my head? All I could think of was what if you were involved? And then I slapped myself because I knew you, Kim Hongjoong. I knew, I believed you would never do something so disgusting.”

“Thanks for believing in me,” Hongjoong sighed, feeling guilt. 

“It was hard lying to you, but I passed you so many hints, hoping you would know what to do. It wasn’t supposed to go wrong in so many ways, Hongjoong. First, I found out the politicians were involved. And when my bosses found out, they struck a deal with the politicians. They decided to bury this under the rug, which meant I had to forget about everything that I worked on. The greater good, they said. I think it was also because they needed us to be lab rats for their latest memory wiper,” you mocked. “So what could I do? I decided to go along with it. I would have to forget you, I learned. I made sure I left something so I could recall my memories one day…”

“With me,” Hongjoong finished and you nodded. “You had prepared me for that day.”

“Yet…” you sighed. “I think it was my fault. It would have been too much for you. You couldn't possibly comprehend the whole situation- no one could have. But then one day, Jaebeom called me to AG, pissed to learn about what happened. And he called you too, knowing it would break us. He threatened to kill you if I didn’t make it, so I called Sunmi ahead. When I reached there, me and Jaebeom fought- I fought for my life, for yours-”

You hid your face in your hands, shaking as you recalled that night. The fear that had gone through your bones when he said he would hurt Hongjoong, his threatening voice- you could still feel it ringing in your head. Hongjoong was quick to scoot closer and put his arms around you, holding you as you tried to steady your breathing.

“I snatched the gun from him and pointed at him,” you sighed. “That’s when you came and misunderstood everything. You believed whatever shit Jaebeom spewed because he was the one defenceless, posing as the victim. I can’t get that look out of my head when I saw your trust in me break.”

“I’m so sorry, y/n,” Hongjoong squeezed your hand. “I remember that.”

“I don’t blame you, Hongjoong,” you shook your head. “You knew nothing about what was going on. Whatever I tried to explain to you at that moment, it must have gone over your head. And last night, I wanted to kill you after I learned the whole truth, honestly,” you laughed a bit. “But now… I don’t blame you. You did what you had to.”

“I was an ass, y/n,” Hongjoong shook his head. 

“You were,” you nodded, smiling. “You exposed yourself to Sunmi which meant she had no choice but to wipe your memories too. And you were so willing to wipe your memories of me. My last hope, gone, just like that. I woke up without knowing what to do. But I think we have suffered enough, the both of us, haven’t we?”

Hongjoong looked up, tears falling down from his face. “I… I really shouldn’t have done that. If you can believe me, I’ve been beating myself over it for the past few days.”

“I know,” you sighed. “But now… we know the whole truth. And I can understand if you wouldn’t want to be with me anymore.”

“Why would I not? I can understand if you wouldn’t want to be with me anymore,” Hongjoong laughed nervously, wiping his eyes. “It was my fault, all of it.”

“It wasn’t any of our fault, let’s just blame the WIS for messing us up. I just don’t like how you didn’t trust me. Not then, not now. You went ahead and talked to Sunmi on your own. What does that say about us, Hongjoong?”

Hongjoong sighed deeply, getting up and you thought he was about to run away but then he was sitting on his knees, in front of you, holding your hands. “That time, and this time… it wasn’t you that I blamed. It was me.”

“What do you mean?”

“I recalled the memory of you pointing your gun at me, asking me to just listen to you. Even though the memory painted you as a villain, I knew, in my heart, that you meant no harm. Just like I knew at that time. I made the mistake of rushing to Sunmi, both the times. I learned what I shouldn’t have. I’m sorry for that. I blamed myself for not being there for you. I felt like shit when I learned everything.”

“No, Hongjoong,” you cupped his face. “I should have told you from the beginning. I shouldn’t have used you like that. I understand now why you acted that way- if I was in your shoes, I’m pretty sure I would have done much worse. If you recall… I’m the more impulsive one.”

Hongjoong shook his head. “You’re only blaming yourself, aren’t you? We both messed up, y/n. Whatever happened simply wasn’t supposed to.”

You nodded. He continued. “I missed you so much. You’ve been my best friend, my everything for so long. I’m sorry I didn’t find you sooner.”

“No,” you cried. “I’m sorry I didn’t find you sooner. I should have done better, I-”

“Don't blame yourself, please,” Hongjoong got up, making you stand so he could hug you. It was like you were in the past at that moment. “I don’t want to see you in pain anymore.”

You hugged Hongjoong back, wrapping your arms around his waist and before you two knew it, you were both crying into the hug. Crying for all the memories you forgot. For the ones you recalled. For the ones that might be lost forever. When you drew back, Hongjoong wiped your face and kissed your forehead.

“I can understand if you don’t want to be with me anymore,” Hongjoong looked like he was in actual pain as he said that. “I’ve broken your trust. I’ve let you down.”

You scanned his face. “Come with me. I want to show you something.”

You took him home and showed him the files and then the USB which had all of your digital memories stored. You both spent the whole night recalling everything, just like old friends, eating ice cream through the bucket, filling the memory gaps for each other. Hongjoong had most of his memories back too.

“I heard from Seonghwa how he told you about the first time we met,” you smiled, searching through the files again and opening the photo of you and Hongjoong wearing ice skates, clinging on to each other for support. “We ditched the party and messed around all night.”

“I’ve never done that,” Hongjoong laughed. “I rarely go to parties. I think going to that party was the best decision I made in my whole life.”

“And I rarely ditch the party with a random stranger and stay out until dawn,” you countered, smiling. “The 3 am hour does something to us, doesn’t it?”

“Our first kiss,” Hongjoong smiled. “We decided to try being friends first because we both believed the 3 am hours make us do weird things, but…”

“We really sucked at staying friends,” you laughed, pushing your hair back as you looked at him- you were sitting across each other on the couch, the laptop on the table. “Do you think we could stay friends now if we tried?”

“I think you think that I can’t keep my hands off of you,” Hongjoong raised a brow.

“I know for a fact that I can’t,” you looked at the clock. “Gosh, it's 3 am again.”

Hongjoong laughed. “Should we really be making such decisions at 3 am?”

“I don’t know,” you pouted. “I say fuck it-”

Hongjoong was quick to climb across the couch and capture your mouth in a kiss, drawing back to check if it was okay with you. You pushed him back, showing him the ice cream bucket still in your hands, placed it on the table and cupped his face, kissing him back, his arms immediately wrapping around your waist as he brought you on top of him. The intensity of the kiss was different, this time with those long forgotten memories and emotions resurfacing, trying to hold yourselves together, trying not to break apart because what happened to you two was sad. 

When you did draw apart for breath, you hugged him, burying your nose in the crook of his neck. “I don’t want to forget you ever again, Kim Hongjoong. You’re the only one for me.”

Hongjoong groaned in relief. “I’m glad… I’m glad that you forgive me.”

You drew apart, slapping his arm. “I still think you can be a major ass, but… I think we can work this out. What do you think?”

Hongjoong tucked your hair behind your ears, caressing your face lovingly. “I think… I think we were meant to be with each other, really. After all, we found each other again, didn’t we? On a train from Sector 1, of all the places!”

You smiled. “Does that mean we are meant to be?”

“Maybe,” Hongjoong smiled. “Shall we try and find out?”

You kissed him as your answer. You could definitely try again.

#i hope this didn't suck as much as i think it does #hongjoong x reader #kim hongjoong x reader #hongjoong fluff #hongjoong angst #hongjoong smut #kim hongjoong fluff #kim hongjoong imagines #kim hongjoong scenarios #kim hongjoong angst #kim hongjoong smut #ateez x reader #ateez imagines #ateez scenarios #ateez fluff #ateez angst #ateez smut

[deja-vux]

Dad!ATEEZ Introductions

Kim Hongjoong

Age: 36

Marital Status: Married, 10 years

Children(age/gender): Soojin-수진(6/F), Seyoon-세윤(2/M)

Nicknames for his kids: Soojin-Soo, Jinnie, Soojinnie, Soosoo, Princess Seyoon-Yoonie, Yoon, Yoonbear, Little Prince

Park Seonghwa

Age: 36

Marital Status: Married, 12 years

Children(age/gender): Minseok-민석(10/M), Misun-미순(9/F)

Nicknames for his kids: Minseok-Min, Minnie, Mini-Me Misun-Minnie, Sunny, Sunshine

Jeong Yunho

Age: 35

Marital Status: Married, 8 years

Children(age/gender):Hyoyeon-효연(8/F), Hwayoung-화영(5/F)

Nicknames for his kids: Hyoyeon- Hyo, Hyoyeonnie, Little Star Hwayoung-Wawa, Hwa, Nugget

Kang Yeosang

Age: 35

Marital Status: Married, 8 years

Children(age/gender): Eunbyul-은별(5/F), Eunjung-은정(1/F)

Nicknames for his kids: Eunbyul-Eunnie, Byul, Miracle Eunjung-Junnie, Jun, Bubs

Choi San

Age: 35

Marital Status: Engaged~Dating, 8 years

Children(age/gender): Yuri- 유리(9/F), Yoongi-윤기(8/M)

Nicknames for his kids: Yuri-Yuyu, Kitten Yoongi-Yoonie, Monkey

Song Mingi

Age: 35

Marital Status: Married, 8 years

Children(age/gender):Daewon-대원(10/M) & Chaewon-채원(10/F), Daeho-대호(4/M)

Nicknames for his kids: Daewon-Dae, Won, Thing 1 Chaewon-Chae, Wonnie, Thing 2 Daeho-Dae Dae, Thing 3

Jung Wooyoung

Age: 35

Marital Status: Married, 7 years

Children(age/gender): Youngjae-영재(3/M), Yejin-예진(3mo/F) & Yujin-유진(3mo/F)

Nicknames for his kids: Youngjae- Jae, JJ, Lil Boss Yejin-Yeji, Jinnie, Ducky Yujin-Yuji, Yuyu, Chicky

Choi Jongho

Age: 34

Marital Status: Married, 4 years

Children(age/gender): Minho-민호(10/M), Minjoon-민준(3/M)

Nicknames for his kids: Minho-Minnie, Min, Little Moon Minjoon-Min, Joonie, Joon, Ace

#dad!ateez #ateez x reader #ateez x y/n #dad au #park seonghwa imagines #kim hongjoong imagines #jeong yunho imagines #kang yeosang imagines #choi san imagines #song mingi imagines #jung wooyoung imagines #choi jongho imagines #ateez imagine #Deja-Vux #+xdeja vux+

[miniseokminnies]

lacy — kim hongjoong

𖦹 pairing: kim hongjoong x gn!reader 𖦹 theme: acquaintances to lovers 𖦹 word count: 2.8k 𖦹 warnings: toxic friendship, anxiety, reader cries, feelings of worthlessness, mentions of reader from previous fic "get him back! named Lacy

𖦹a/n: happy comeback atiny!

moodboard by @myhimbomingi

Dear angel Lacy, eyes white as daisies, did I ever tell you I'm not doing well?

NOVEMBER

The strong aroma of coffee filled your senses, making you scrunch your nose. As often as you did your school work in the coffee shop down the street from your apartment complex you should be used to the smell by now.  The music blasting through your headphones made you thankful to be rid of one of the many sensory experiences housed within the building, making the smell almost bearable. This distraction, along with your work splayed out in front of you, however, does prevent you from noticing the figure approaching your table. 

This figure swiftly picks up your mug and takes a whiff of its contents, quickly making his face twist into an expression not unlike yours from moments ago. You look up from your work to reprimand this weirdo, only to see Kim Hongjoong, a friend of a friend, lazily plopping into the chair across from you. Hongjoong was speaking animatedly and gesticulating wildly, his voice drowned out by the music pulsing in your ears. Removing your headphones, and looking at him quizzically you catch the end of his rant, 

“I mean for goodness sake, Y/N, this is a coffee shop! A good one at that! God damn hot cider…” he trailed off finally looking at you. 

“Hello to you too, Hongjoong,” you offered, rolling your eyes “What can I help you with?” you asked removing your other headphone. When you didn’t hear Hongjoong respond you looked up to be met with him looking at you confused, “I mean…what’s happening with Seonghwa and Lacy now?” 

“What?” Hongjoong looked around dramatically, “who said something was happening with them?” he asked, leaning towards you resting his chin in his hands. 

“Well…” you hesitated, “no one I guess, but when do we really ever talk otherwise?” A brief look of hurt broke across his features before his neutral expression returned. 

“What were you listening to before I interrupted you?” He changed the subject. A smirk broke out on his face, seeing your confused expression at his random outburst.  Even so, you handed him one of your earbuds and pressed play. He bobbed his head to the song before removing the earbud, “Interesting, you study here everyday?” You nodded, “see you tomorrow” he got up and left the shop. 

***

“You ready?” you heard a familiar voice ring out behind you in line. Turning around you took in the sight of Hongjoong, he was smiling widely at you, he had gotten a haircut and half of it was now bleached to be blonde, a stark difference from the natural black on the other side. He was bundled up in his coat and a scarf around his neck, indicating that he may have walked here, or he had intentions of walking at some point today. 

“Ready for..what?” you asked, moving forward in line to order your drink. Before Hongjoong had the chance to respond, he was interrupted by the barista at the counter, 

“What can I get you today?” she smiled at you. 

“A hot spiced cider and an americano” Hongjoong chirped from behind you, he pulled out his card and extended it forward toward the barista. You looked back at him, raising an eyebrow. All you got in return was a smile and a wink before he moved forward to handle the payment pad. The two of you moved toward the order pickup counter, 

“You didn’t have to do that,” you offered looking up at him.  

“I know,” he smiled, bumping your shoulder with his, “but we’re friends, and I wanted to” this is the first time you’ve heard him refer to the two of you as friends. The statement made you smile, along with a swooping feeling in your stomach. Once the drinks were ready he took both of them and handed the cider to you, “I still can’t believe you come to this nice of a coffee shop to order something other than coffee” he said, shaking his head, “but I digress, would you like to take a walk with me?” seeing your hesitation he added, “I promise you’ll have time to study afterwards” with this addition you agreed to his offer. 

The two of you exited the shop and he led you in a way he seemed to find familiar. The walk was shrouded in silence, but not one you found uncomfortable. You clutched onto your cup for warmth, as the November air was beginning to grow brisk as the month hurdled toward winter. Out of the corner of his eye he saw you pull your cup closer to you. 

After some walking you found yourself in a park, one you never knew about despite living here for several years. The park was small and the sole bench, you saw now, was obscured by the trees that were displaying gorgeous hues of orange and red. Hongjoong drifted closer to the bench and gestured for you to follow. As you moved closer to him and the bench he turned to you and began to unwrap his own scarf. 

“C’mere” he placed the scarf around your neck and wrapped it for you, “it’s cold today” he explained, as if that would make sense of his actions. His hands lingered once the scarf was wrapped warmly around your neck. Hongjoong desperately tried to keep eye contact with you, his eyes would drift to your lips if he wasn’t careful. He knew this moment was fragile and he had no intentions of ruining it. You broke him out of his trance by clearing your throat, “oh” he mumbled, removing his hands from the scarf and taking a seat on the bench. You followed his lead, still unsure what the intentions of this excursion were. 

Hongjoong let a thoughtful silence hang in the air, and you were not going to be the one to break it. You took a breath, letting the feeling of the chilly air bloom in your chest and the aroma of fallen leaves fill your senses. You felt serene for the first time in quite some time, even next to someone you only saw at parties you felt relaxed. Soon, it was Hongjoong’s turn to break you out of a trance, “Do you really think I don’t want to talk to you?” he muttered, he was staring straight ahead, fixed on some point in the tree line across from the two of you. 

“What?” you blurted, louder than you intended, louder than he had been. 

“You said in the coffee shop we only talk when Hwa and Lacy are being Hwa and Lacy” he chuckled, turning toward you, “do you really think that’s the only time we should talk?” he said, his deep brown eyes searching yours. The attention made you flush, your cheeks growing warm. 

“I don’t know” you shrugged, pulling the scarf closer to you, trying to hide how you were squirming under his gaze, “we know each other through Lacy, so…” you trailed off as the smell of the leaves was replaced by the smell of his cologne. 

“What’s the deal with you and Lacy anyway?” he switched his tactic, clearly not getting anywhere, “I mean you guys barely seem like friends” he added. 

“We used to be” you sighed, “and I’d like to be again…but since Seonghwa she’s been different. I hope they work their shit out, but I hope we can be friends like we used to be” you surprised yourself with your honesty. “and Hongjoong? If I’m being honest, I don’t really feel like myself around her either.” feeling the sting of tears threatening in the corners of your eyes you turned away from him. 

Hongjoong felt a bit of panic settle in his gut, he wasn’t intending for this to be the way the conversation went. He reached out and hesitated for a moment before placing his hand on your shoulder and turning you toward him. Your eyes were glassy with tears threatening to spill, the sight was enough to make Hongjoong’s heart clench, he really had no idea how much you were struggling with your friendship, and feeling alone. 

“You’re amazing,” he said, barely above a whisper, “you know that right?” the tears blurring your vision threatening to spill now did just that. A few streamed down your cheeks, the cold air hitting them. You hadn’t expected to cry, let alone to Hongjoong. However, you couldn’t remember the last time someone had complimented you like that. Going to university in a city several hours away from everyone you knew, aside from Lacy, was lonely. Especially now that your friend was distant, sure you saw her at parties and every so often after your classes, but she and her friends were older than you. You felt partially fooolish for letting her convince you to come to school here now that she had graduated. Just then you felt Hongjoong’s soft hands cup both of your cheeks and you honestly thought he was going to kiss you. 

Butterflies erupted in your stomach at the thought. However, he just used his thumbs to brush the tears off your cheeks. Oh. Why were you slightly disappointed? You’re barely friends. What you didn’t know is that he desperately wanted to connect his lips with yours but he didn’t want to take advantage of your emotional state. He settled for continuing to stroke your cheeks with his thumbs. “I really mean it, Y/N, I think you’re amazing” 

The two of you stayed at the park for the better part of an hour after that. Hongjoong told you that he likes to come here during his lunch break at work or on the weekends to just think. He seemed to have a lot of thoughts trapped in his head you learned. He was much more thoughtful than you imagined of him, you were accustomed to seeing him at least tipsy, or trying to get there. He decided that the two of you would not talk about Lacy or Seonghwa for the rest of the day, a fact he informed you of quickly after he released your face from his soft grasp. You eagerly agreed to this. Presently you shivered on the bench due to your cider being long gone and the breeze picking up. 

“Let’s go” Hongjoong said standing up and extending his hand to you, “you need to study and I have something to show you.” sparing him a questioning glance you took his hand expecting him to let it go once he helped you up off the bench. On the contrary, he interlaced your fingers and began to walk away from the park bench. You decided not to question something for once in your life and embraced the butterflies who took up residence in your stomach that day. 

Soon, after a short walk in comfortable silence and Hongjoong’s warm hand in yours, you were standing in front of the familiar house belonging to Seonghwa and Hongjoong. He slipped his hand out of yours and dug his keys out of his pocket. 

“You know who” he started, not wanting to fully break his promise of not talking about Seonghwa, “isn’t home, hasn’t been for a few days, probably with uh-“ he looked at you sheepishly ushering you inside. Nodding, you let him invite you in and you realized you’d never been at Hongjoong’s outside of a party situation, not to mention you’ve never been alone with him. 

He led you back through the kitchen, towards his bedroom, or where you assume his bedroom was. You had seen Lacy and Seonghwa disappear back this way a time or twenty. He passed a door and then opened another that sat at the end of the hallway. You took in the room, the purple LED lights lining the ceiling and the large computer sitting on the back wall, opposite the bed. “Make yourself comfortable, I have some stuff to work on too, so I won’t disturb your studies, okay?” he slipped off his coat and his shoes, now in a hoodie and jeans. You followed suit and draped his scarf over the back of his computer chair. 

The only place to sit in the room, besides the computer chair that Hongjoong was now occupying turning his computer on, was his bed. You were trying to stay calm and not think about how strangely intimate it felt to even be sitting here in the first place. You pulled your textbook out of your bag and got to work on taking notes on your assigned passages. 

You don’t know how long Hongjoong and yourself sat together working on your own tasks. Things started off fine, you studied contentedly in the low light of his bedroom, until you dared to sneak a look. Hongjoong, even though all you could see was the back of his head, looked totally in his element. He had some software you didn’t recognize pulled up on his computer screen, but judging by the bobbing of his head and the occasional humming it probably had something to do with music. 

A few hours went by with Hongjoong completely unaware of your distraction and your desperate attempts to focus. You barely got through one chapter of note taking when he swiveled around in his chair to face you. You quickly ducked your head down to look at your book, letters swimming around the page.  He moved his headphones down around his neck and stretched his arms over his head letting a small groan leave his lips. You looked up at the sound, hopefully being convincing that you didn’t know he had turned around. 

“C’mere” he held out his hand but didn’t move any closer to you, “got something to show you” 

“Oh?” you inquired, trying to stay calm while you hopped off the bed and crossed the room, taking his hand. He dragged you closer to his chair, and hesitated for a moment. He looked up at you, “can…can you sit with me?” butterflies erupted immediately at the question, “it’s easier that way, you don’t know the controls,” he explained quickly, you could’ve sworn embarrassment dripped from his tone. However, you allowed him to guide you down to sit in his chair with him. You were practically on his lap, his chest against your back. 

He took the headphones from around his neck and placed them over your ears. His arms then moved to the keyboard, brushing your sides on the way. He typed a few commands into the program and music began to flood your ears. Hongjoong so desperately wanted to wrap his arms around your middle while you listened but not wanting to push his luck more than he already had he kept his fingers on the keyboard. 

The song was good, great even, it had no words but you could feel the emotion in the music alone. You had no idea why he was playing this for you and why it was necessary for you to be in his lap, a blushing mess, for you to listen to it. However, for the second time today, and in your life, you chose not to question something that felt right. When the music faded from your ears you pushed one side of the headset to the side. 

“Did you make that?” you asked, craning your neck trying to look at him behind you. When your eyes laid on him you realized he looked just as flustered as you felt. 

“I-uh” he blushed, “I did.” he looked at you, “I hope you liked it” 

“Hongjoong,” you whispered, once again too scared to break the moment, “it was amazing” you dared to glance at his lips briefly. Everything happened so fast after that, one of his hands was back on your cheek, the other on the ear that the headset remained on, and his lips were on yours. Momentary shock settled in your stomach before even more butterflies grew in its place. Your eyelids sunk closed and you allowed yourself to enjoy this moment. 

Hongjoong’s hands moved to your waist and assisted you in readjusting the way you were sitting so you didn’t have to be twisted uncomfortably. You took his headphones off and attempted to place them nicely on the desk. You honestly had no idea if that’s what happened or not. As you slipped your arms around his neck he swiped his tongue against your bottom lip, requesting entrance that you gladly granted. 

Hongjoong tasted like coffee, weirdly in his mouth you didn’t mind the taste. Your senses were filled with him, and you tried to understand how you’d gone this long without. Soon, he broke away from you, both of you breathing heavily. His eyes were searching yours again, he didn’t know what he was looking for he just liked looking at you. 

“That song you were listening to yesterday?” he broke the silence. 

“Mhmm?” you hummed, confused why he was bringing it up right now. 

“It sucked” he breathed, “listen to mine from now on” 

#bennie’s works #kim hongjoong x reader #kim hongjoong imagines #ateez fanfic #ateez x reader #ateez imagines #GUTS by bennie #Spotify

[woojoongstreasure]

It Was Supposed To Be You | Kim Hongjoong

Pairing: Kim Hongjoong x Fem!Reader 

Synopsis: Y/N runs into her ex the night before she's meant to be getting married.

Warnings: Angst turned to fluff. Ex-lovers to lovers. Swearing. Kinda run-away brideish. This is a repost from my now deactivated blog. More of an explanation in my pinned post.

Word Count: 3,013 - this is the longest imagine I've ever written. It took 4-5 days and a lot of editing. I hope you all enjoy. 

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Y/N can't help but laugh at a joke told by her maid of honour. She is out for dinner and cocktails, celebrating what her friends and her older sister affectionately refer to as her "last night of freedom". Shes getting married tomorrow afternoon. Everything appears to be going well until she sees someone she never expected to see again.  

Kim Hongjoong, her first and former love, is seated at a nearby table with his friends. Filled with a mix of emotions, she excuses herself from the group of women she's with, mentioning that she needs to use the restroom. She politely declines her sister’s offer to accompany her, and she walks in the opposite direction of the restrooms.  

Stepping outside the restaurant into the cool night air, hoping the gentle breeze will help alleviate her overwhelming feelings, she doesn’t notice she's being followed until she hears his familiar voice. It's the same voice that she once adored and found comfort in, whether he was talking, rapping, singing, or shouting at his fellow members.  

She turns to face him, unsure of what to say or do. The last time they had seen each other, it had been a whirlwind of anger and heartbreak. Determined to keep her composure, she acts as she hadn’t just seen him a minute ago. "Kim Hongjoong?"  

"I heard you were back in town," he says, a look of surprise on his face. His eyes drift towards her hand, fixating on her large engagement ring. "I heard you're getting married." His eyes met hers again with a mix uncertainty and a hint of sadness. "Congratulations."    

Avoiding his gaze, she glances down at her shoes and quietly thanks him.   

"Are you happy?" Hongjoong is unable to stop himself from asking. Thoughts of her, her happiness, and the impending wedding have consumed his mind ever since Wooyoung shared the news with him last night.  

Tears threaten to fall as she struggles to hold back her feeling as she continues to avoid his intense stare and nodded her head. She knows as soon as she looks at him, he will see the doubt written all over her face.  

In the weeks leading up to her wedding day, she has been plagued with self-doubt. Is she happy? She believes so. Her fiancé is a good man who treats her well and cares for her. However, deep down, she knows he is not the one she always pictured marrying. The painful truth is that he will never be.  

Because the man she had once imagined spending her life with now stands before her, igniting a whirlwind of conflicting feelings. Memories of their past relationship flood her mind, reminding her of the deep and unconditional love they once shared. It was a love that was abruptly cut short, leaving her heartbroken and longing for what could have been.  

Even after meeting her fiancée and allowing herself to move on, her thoughts wandered back to Hongjoong often. But it was never intentional. She'd hear his songs on the radio, overhear teenagers at the coffee shop she worked at discussing ATEEZ's latest comeback, posters would be hung up in the music store she walked past on her way to work, and her younger sister, who was a toddler when she and Hongjoong met, will ask about him every time she visits her parent’s home.  

She shakes her head, as she gathers the strength to confront her feelings. "I... I'm happy, but not as happy as I used to be," she confesses, her voice barely loud enough for him to hear her. "I was happier when we were together."  

Hongjoong's eyes widen as her confession weighs heavily in the air between them. He takes a step closer, his presence enveloping her in a familiar warmth that she has missed. It's as if time stood still, and they are transported back to when their love was all-consuming.    

Reaching out, he gently places a hand on her arm, offering her a comforting touch. He smiles, his eyes reflecting a mixture of sadness and understanding. “I was happier when I was with you too.”  

It was at that moment the tears began to fall as she finally embraced the truth – she only settled for a good man, because her heart will always belong to Hongjoong. The thought of calling off her engagement crosses her mind. Immediately after, a wave of guilt washes over her.  

"It was supposed to be you," she reminds him. "I was supposed to marry you."  

 "I know," he says, hanging his head in shame. "But I fucked up and now you're marrying someone else."  

"I am," she says trying to sound confident as she lifts her head but still won't look at him, knowing if she did, she wouldn’t be able to contain herself. "It was nice seeing you again."  

Before he can reply, she turns on her heel and starts walking away from the restaurant, unable to go back inside and pretend nothing just happened.  

Y/N enters her parent's home well past midnight, only to find her sister anxiously waiting for her. With a deadly expression, her sister rises from the couch to confront her.   

"Where the hell have you been?" She whispers yells, making sure not to wake their parents and younger sister. “You took off from the restaurant and we couldn’t call you because you left your phone at the restaurant. We’ve been worried sick about you. I only just managed to get mum and dad to go to bed. I promised them I would stay up and wait for you.”  

"I’m," Y/N lowers her head in embarrassment. She intended to message her sister, but upon reaching the park, she realized she had left her phone behind.   

"What's wrong with you? Does it have something to do with Hongjoong? I saw him at the restaurant and wondered if you had seen him too."   

Y/N nods in response. Even after leaving Hongjoong at the restaurant, he continued to occupy her thoughts. The more she thought about him, the more she contemplated calling off the wedding. However, guilt would always creep in, reminding her that she is marrying the man that she’s supposed to marry.  

 "What happened?" her sister asks, her angry expression transforming into one of concern. She’d witnessed the aftermath of Y/N and Hongjoong's breakup, so she knows how heartbroken Y/N was and hoped Hongjoong was just as heartbroken, if not more.  

"Nothing," Y/N lies, brushing past her sister and heading towards her old bedroom. "I'll see you in the morning."   

"But-"  

Y/N cuts her sister off by closing the door, knowing that it wasn't just "nothing".  Y/N had been fine before she left. Her sister was determined to uncover the truth in the morning, one way or another.  

“Oh, sweetie, you look absolutely beautiful,” Y/N’s mother gushes as they stand in the living room, admiring her in the full-length mirror. Y/N just finished getting ready, with her hair and makeup perfectly done.  

Y/N attempts to smile, but it quickly falters. The thought of calling off the wedding haunted her all night, as she struggled to push Hongjoong out of her mind.   

She’s tried to convince herself that she is ready to move on, that her love for Hongjoong is a thing of the past. And for a while, it seemed like she had succeeded. Her fiancée become her everything.  

But, as the wedding day grew nearer, doubts began to creep into her mind. She couldn't ignore the nagging feeling that maybe she hasn't fully let go of her past. When thoughts of Hongjoong resurfaced, she would find herself questioning if she was truly ready to commit her life to someone else.  

It isn't fair to her fiancée, who has done nothing but love and support her. She remembers the way her fiancée's eyes light up when she said yes to marrying him. Calling of the wedding, would be an act of betrayal. But is it a betrayal she’s willing to commit?   

No matter how much time passes, the memories of Hongjoong refuse to fade. From the early mornings spent together before he had to be at the studio to the late nights she’d stay awake just to make sure he went to bed and got a decent amount of sleep, to being his biggest support during his trainee days. They lingered in the deepest corners of her mind, like a constant presence that she couldn’t escape.   

Their relationship had been built on love, trust, understanding, and a shared passion for everything they loved and enjoyed. It was a relationship that evolved into something more meaningful than they ever imagined it would. Despite the challenges they encountered, their commitment to each other never faltered. When he left school to pursue his dreams of becoming an idol, she was there, as his biggest supporter. Likewise, he was there as she pursued her passion in photography, a shared interest they both loved. Every moment they spent together, the good and the bad, left a mark on her heart. After their breakup, she spent so many nights replaying their memories over and over again, wondering where it all went wrong and how they could have fixed it.  

With a heavy heart and tears streaming down her face, she desperately reaches behind her, struggling to find the zipper of her dress so she can take it off.  

 "What's the matter?" Her mom inquires, taken aback by her daughter's behaviour. She noticed her acting strangely throughout the morning, but assumed it was just pre-wedding nerves. Now, she thinks that something more that is troubling her.  

The only word that she can get out is, "Hongjoong."    

"What does Hongjoong have to do with anything?"   

"Please just unzip my dress," Y/N pleads, frustrated with her own failed attempts and her mom's lack of help. "I need to take it off." Her voice grows louder with each word as she becomes more desperate to remove the white garment. Her cries catch the attention of her older sister, who rushes into the room concerned.  

“What’s going on?”  

“I don’t know,” her mom replies, “Something about Hongjoong?”  

At the mention of his name, Y/N collapses to the floor, sobbing. Everything from the past few weeks comes rushing to the surface.   

Her sister kneels beside her, embracing her tightly, doing her best to provide some comfort. It's been a while since she's seen Y/N this distraught. Their mother joins them, wrapping her arms around her two eldest daughters.   

"Tell us what's going on, sweetheart," her mom coos, concern filling her voice. She motions for everyone else to leave the room to give them privacy. The last thing she wants is for Y/N to feel embarrassed when the gossip train, especially her cousin, starts spreading rumours.  

Y/N, through her tears, lets it all out. She tells them about what happened the night before and all the ways she's felt recently. Her sister and mother listen patiently, giving her the room to speak without any interruption. As she finishes telling them everything, a feeling of calmness comes over her.  

Y/N's mother, broke the silence that had fallen over them as they tried to think of something to say. "what are the odds of him showing up like that? You haven’t seen him in three years and last night he just so happened to be at the restaurant you’re at. It's like fate was giving you one last chance to reconsider.”  

Her mother's words seemed to validate everything Y/N was thinking. The encounter with her ex-boyfriend, just hours before she was set to marry another man, felt like more than just a mere coincidence.   

And this wasn’t coming from a place of hate, disappointment or unsupportiveness, on her mother’s behalf. While her parents think that her fiancée is a good and decent man, they had witnessed their her previous relationship, and couldn't help but notice the subtle hints that suggest she is not completely over Hongjoong. When they confronted her about it, she would shrug it off, making it seem like there is nothing to be concerned about. Their advice was not meant to discourage her from moving forward with her fiancée, but rather to ensure that she went into this new relationship with a clear and open heart.  

"You're right," Y/N whispers, her voice barely loud enough for her mom and sister to hear.   

Her mom reaches out and gently squeezes her hand, offering her support. "Sweetheart, sometimes we get so caught up in what we think we should do, that we forget to listen to our own hearts. It's okay to question things and to take a step back to rethink it over. This is your life. You get to choose who to spend it with.”  

Tears form in Y/N's eyes once again, but this time they are tears of relief from having her family’s support. With nothing more to be said, she quickly stands up and rushes to her bedroom, searching for some clothes to change into. Her mother follows behind her and helps her out of the dress. She quickly changes and goes to leave the room but hesitates.  

“What about the wedding?” she asks.  

“Your father and I will handle it,” Her mom assures her. “Now go work it out with Hongjoong and call us later.”  

Her hand still on the doorknob, she hesitates again as her gaze falls on the beautiful engagement ring adorning her finger. With a sigh, she gently slides the ring off her finger, feeling the weight of her decision in her hands.  

Turning towards her mom, she hands her the ring. As she speaks, her words are filled with guilt, "Let him know that he deserves someone who is sure of what she wants and can give him the same love that he has given me. Tell him that I’m sorry I couldn’t be that person for him.”  

Her mom nods and takes the ring. She hugs her before going back to the door. Taking a deep breath, she turns the doorknob and leaves the room.  

Arriving at Hongjoong's dorm, she anxiously knocks on the door, hoping he's inside. As the door swings open, her excitement fades seeing Wooyoung standing there. It's not that she doesn’t want to see Wooyoung, she would be thrilled to see all the guys again, she was really hoping it would be Hongjoong that answered the door.  

“Y/N?” Wooyoung asks with a look of disbelief. “I thought you were getting married today,” he continues as he takes her in. She’s standing there in an oversized t-shirt, a pair of denim shorts, her hair a mess and her make up smudged from the all the crying and then trying to fix it. A look of empathy crosses his face. “Are you okay?”  

“Is uh… is Hongjoong here?” She asks as her, her anxiousness growing but the second.   

He nods looking back towards the inside of the dorm, “I’ll go get him for you. Did you want to come in?”  

She shakes her head, “I’ll stay here.”  

He nods again and leaves, leaving the door open, to get Hongjoong.  

A minute or so later, Hongjoong arrives at the door, the same look of surprise on his face as last night. “Shouldn’t you be getting married right now?”  

Shaking her head, “I couldn’t marry him, not when the man I want to spend the rest of my life with is right here, in front of me.”  

“But after everything that happened, you should hate me.”  

“You weren’t the only one who fucked up, Hongjoong,” she says, her voice filled with sincerity. “Leaving you instead of fighting for you, is the biggest regret of my life. We could have worked it out but instead we let each other go. But I haven’t been able to let you go. You’re always in my mind, in my dreams and everywhere I go. Seeing you last night, made me realize that you’re the still the one who I can see myself spending the rest of my life with.”  

Hongjoong's surprised expression slowly transforms into a mixture of hope and uncertainty. He takes a step closer, closing the door behind him so they could talk without the other guys being nosy. His eyes search hers for any sign of doubt.   

"Are you sure?" he asks, his voice filled with a vulnerability he often doesn’t express. She reaches out and gently takes his hand, intertwining their fingers.   

"I’ve never been more sure," she replies, her voice steady. "I love you, Hongjoong, and I want to be with you."   

A wave of relief washes over Hongjoong, and a small smile tugs at the corners of his lips. "I couldn't let you go either. And I never stopped loving you."   

They stand there, eyes locked together, and fingers entwined. Their past mistakes and the uncertainty of their future hangs in the air, but they both willing to fight for their love.   

"Let’s start over," he finally says, with a new sense of determination.    

A single tear of joy escapes her eye. Without hesitation, he reaches out, and lightly brushes away the tear. With his hand cupping her face, he leans in closer, his lips planting to hers in a soft and lingering kiss.   

As they part, a smile spreads across his face, showing the happiness he's feeling right now. Seeing him smile, causes her to smile, her own happiness mirroring his.  

 "What's the bet the guys have are up against the door trying to listen in, right now," he chuckles, knowing his group members well enough to know they will be.   

 "I wouldn't past them," she agrees just as there is a loud shout from Wooyoung telling someone off for standing on his hand.  

“Let’s get out of here,” he suggests, “I’m not ready to share you with them yet,” he adds earning another shout from Wooyoung and groan from the others before the door swings open and arguing ensues.  

Y/N and Hongjoong, quietly sneak away, wanting to be alone for a little while longer as they talk and get to know each other again. 

Likes, comments & reblogs are welcomed and appreciated. 

©️ 2024 CRAZYFORMFICS. NO ONE HAS PERMISSION TO COPY, TRANSLATE AND/OR REPOST MY WORKS ON HERE OR ANY OTHER SITE.

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[kmultismut]

Handcuffs

Genre: smut

Member: Hongjoong x reader

You had Hongjoong, in the center of the room, tied up to a chair with handcuffs. He had only his underwear on, and was sitting still, waiting for your commands. You slowly started talking your clothes off, leaving you in matching underwear. You circled around him, letting your hand brush over his body. Once you made it around, you sat on him. "Since you're being such a good boy I'm going to give you a little reward." He smiled and you moved your hips back and forth, giving both of you much needed pleasure. He bit his lip and let out a quiet moan. His hands tried to touch your hips but failed miserably. You laughed at his try, but also found it kinda cute. "What's the rush, baby boy?", you laughed. "Just wanna feel you.", he said with his whiny voice. "We'll get there.", you said and got up. He protested with a pout. "Stop that, I thought you were being a good boy.", you laughed and grabbed his chin. "I am." You shook your head and said, "I'm going to let this one slide." You continued taking off your clothes. First you reached your hand back and unclasped your bra. You let it fall down onto the floor. You than slowly turned around and bent over as you slid your panties down your legs. You kicked your bra and panties aside and walked towards him. You sat back down on him and moved your hips once again. Your arousal started making his underwear wet, making him curse at the sight. You lifted your hips up and slid off his underwear. You pumped him a few times before aligning him with you. You kissed him as you sank down onto him. Both of you moaned at the same time. "Sh*t, baby.", he moaned as you placed kisses down his neck. You moved your hips painfully slowly up and down his c*ck. "Feels so full.", you moaned into his neck. "I know, baby. Feels too good.", he said as he got lost in the pleasure. You placed a hand on his cheek, making him open his eyes. You leaned in and kissed him passionately. You suddenly heard something fall to the ground. You didn't even have time to register what that sound was before Hongjoong picked you up and put you down onto the bed. He picked up the pace making you forget about anything else. You wrapped your legs around his waist and let him take control. He placed kisses down your neck and chest as his hand started circling your clit. "Sh*t, baby!", you moaned loudly as you came on his c*ck. "That's it, baby.", he praised you and followed soon behind. 

#hongjoong smut #kim hongjoong smut #kim hongjoong imagines #hongjoong imagines #hongjoong x reader #hongjoong x y/n #hongjoong x you #ateez x reader #ateez smut #ateez imagines #ateez hongjoong #ateez hard hours #ateez leader

[fantastic-bby]

Pairing: Reader x Hongjoong

Word count: 1.3

Genre: Angst | Non-Idol AU | Is a heavy reference to Rick and Morty's Unity, but I just never found the right time to post it (I wrote it more than a year ago)

You and Hongjoong have always been in this horribly dangerous and toxic cycle; at least until Seonghwa takes it upon himself to try and stop it.

Warnings: Heavily implied drug abuse | Heavily implied alcoholism | Implied sex

A/n: Everyone say hello to the winner of this month's Choose a Fic! p.s I'm surprised this one won, but I hope you guys enjoy!

Masterlist

[23:49]

It went without saying that what you two had wasn’t the healthiest thing in the world. He couldn’t even call it a relationship from how you were technically broken up… only you two would constantly fuck whenever you ‘bumped’ into each other at parties or at dinners with mutual friends.

Which leads Hongjoong to his current situation: 

His, so far, week-long bender with you as you both continue to feed each other more drugs and more alcohol only to end up having messy, extremely uncoordinated, but—for some reason—the best sex you both can get. 

And it’s disgustingly messy and extremely toxic with how the both of you are sober, clean, and happy when you’re away from each other. But whenever you’re together, you’re drunk, high, constantly having sex, or screaming the most foul and hurtful shit to each other. 

Despite how toxic and unhealthy your relationship is, you both can’t seem to let each other go because it’s familiar. As torturous as it is, Hongjoong finds your presence and company to be familiar enough for him to yearn for. And as much as everyone tells you to leave him, you just can’t seem to stay away from him for too long. 

Which is horrible considering how much more functionable and productive you are when Hongjoong isn’t in the picture. The way you’re both completely sober without each other only adds to the fact that everyone thinks you’re not healthy for each other. 

Because you’re both only ever on benders when you’re together. And it doesn’t create the best reputation for Hongjoong whenever he calls you up in the middle of the night and you disappear to drink and fuck for weeks. 

“Coming!” Hongjoong calls as he stumbles towards the banging front door, clumsily throwing on his t-shirt before opening it. Seonghwa stands outside with his arms crossed over his chest, displeasure painting his features as he lets his eyes scan Hongjoong’s state. “Oh,” he grumbles, a tinge of annoyance filling him at the sight of his friend. “What are you doing here?”

“I’m here to pull you out of this fucking bender,” Seonghwa states. 

“I don’t need someone to ‘pull me out’ Hwa. I’m perfectly fine,” Hongjoong argues with a snort. 

“You might be, but they’re not.” His eyes flit behind Hongjoong and it makes him turn around to see you standing in the living room, one of Hongjoong’s oversized t-shirts engulfing your frame, and staring at them. 

“What’s that supposed to mean?” 

“It means that you’re a bad fucking influence on them. (Y/n) owns a restaurant and they’re not even there anymore because you keep bringing them away. They own multiple cafes and they can’t be there because you keep dragging them on benders. They have actual goals compared to you and you keep tearing that shit down instead.” 

Hongjoong can feel the twinge of annoyance becoming stronger and stronger the longer Seonghwa stands in front of him, but you speak before he can do anything. 

“Seonghwa, I think you’re overreacting,” you laugh, hand waving to visibly brush it off. “It’s not like it’s anything that bad. Joongie and I are just having fun.” You move to Hongjoong’s side and wrap your arms around his waist. “I need the break every once in a while, ya’know? Just some time to relax and have fun with him.” 

“You guys broke up two years ago and you’re still fucking each other when you’re drunk or high. It’s not healthy. You guys go on benders that can last up to months, and, honestly? I’m surprised you guys aren’t fucking dead with how much shit you put into yourselves,” Seonghwa argues. 

He’s obviously getting more agitated as well, which only fuels the anger that bubbles in the pit of Hongjoong’s stomach.

“We like doing this, okay? We like being with each other and we like doing this together. Why can’t you  just accept the fact that (Y/n) and I are together?”

“It’s unhealthy!”

“It’s temporary!” Hongjoong yells. “Why are you so up my fucking ass about this?! It’s not like I’m doing the bender with you! I’m doing it with (Y/n) and they’re perfectly fine with it.”

Your grip around Hongjoong’s loosen as the argument starts to get heated. The tension in the air starts to thicken and it’s making you uncomfortable. You never really saw your relationship with Hongjoong as anything more than a momentary release from the real world; a form of escapism that you would never fail to hop onto just to relax.

But hearing how it seemed to Seonghwa just made you feel… ashamed. 

It was never a problem in the beginning because you had always seen your relationship as something that was good. 

But you wonder how Seonghwa must’ve been thinking about it this entire time. 

Hongjoong just wants to have fun and you knew that from the first time you met him, and you broke up with him because of his inability to want to actually grow. Hongjoong likes things the way they are and he’s so terrified of change that, no matter how long you two spend apart, he’s still always exactly the same.

And hearing it come out of Seonghwa’s mouth finally seems to put it into perspective for you. You’re finally able to see it from the lens of someone else and you realise that the bottom line of this horrible codependent relationship that you and Hongjoong have is purely fun. He’s fun and that’s all you ever want out of him—it’s all he’s ever wanted out of you.  

“Mind your own damn business and get the fuck out of my apartment,” Hongjoong finally spits before slamming the door in Seonghwa’s face, a twang hitting your chest just as he does. He lets out a heavy sigh and turns to you, “sorry about that, babe. Hwa overreacts over these things sometimes.” 

“I-I don’t know, Joong. Maybe he has a point,” you mumble. 

“Don’t let it get to you. He’s just upset because I don’t see him often whenever I’m with you,” he quickly grumbles and pulls away from you. “Come on. We don’t have to let him be such a buzzkill. We have the rest of the week to fuck around, baby, and then we’ll get you back to your work.” 

Despite the growing uneasiness filling you, you decide to give Hongjoong this fleeting moment of freedom. 

He needs it anyway, you think. 

You made up your mind the moment he slammed the door in Seonghwa’s face. 

And when Hongjoong wakes up the next morning, you’ve disappeared from his apartment with nothing but a note on his bed. 

I can’t do this in person because I know I’ll just end up coming back to you like I always do, but you have to agree to some extent that Seonghwa’s right, Joong. What we have isn’t healthy and it never was; not even when we were dating. 

You don’t want change and the reason why I was okay with it was because there’s something wrong with me too. I loved you because I was in love with the idea of never having to change anything… which only adds to my point. We both feed off of each other, and to some extent, I indulge in letting you completely control my decisions and without me even realising it until it’s too late. 

For some reason, you’ve always been such a big part of me. And because of that, it’s easy for me to fall back into you over and over again no matter how much this relationship is basically torture for the both of us. 

I’m blocking you on everything to try and break this toxic cycle so we can both grow and be happy away from each other. 

Yours, and, forever, only yours,

(Y/n)

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[sansblkgirlfriend]

Saved - K.HJ

Synopsis: The Pirate King is a scary man, the village lives in fear of him every single day. But you, you are one of the only people who wished that he would whisk you away to escape the life you're living.

Pairing: Pirate Captain! Kim Hongjoong x Reader Theme: Pirate Au Word Count: 1.6k words

Tags: Mentions of kidnapping, death, murder, manipulation, fragile mind, use of a gun.

Tags: to be added

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The villages of the Kingdom of Wonderland stayed in fear, they knew that once every three months, the fierce pirate king would come and take away people to join his squad. 

If you refused to go, it’s simple, you died. 

It was everyone above the age of 21, the pirate king showed no discrimination, he took whoever he saw fit. And sometimes if they refused, he would either kill them right there in front of their family, or wait till they left the pier and toss them overboard.

He would take husbands and wives, sons and daughters. He did not care if you had a fiance, or you were about to be married, he was taking you with him. You would watch as many families cried as their families were stripped away from them, taken away to never be seen again.

Your family was waiting for the day you were taken away.

You lived with your mother, father, older brother and sister, making you the youngest of the family. Your parents tried on several occasions to wed you off to another family, claiming that would make you worth more. They despised the fact that you preferred to be out doing work with your other friends then learn how to be a mother and cook and other things that your parents try to force on you.

They call you the black sheep, the extra child, the one they couldn’t kill. Plenty of other hurtful names.

But you? You were actually hoping that you’d get taken away by the scary king of the seas. You heard rumors from other sailors that he showers the women he takes with riches and love, treating them like they’re precious metal, a position any woman would die to get in. But now, instead they were told the cruel stories of him killing people, slaughtering innocent families.

“(Y/N)!! Get ready to board up the house!!”

You sighed as you headed out the front door and down the road, the local shop sells wood for the families to prepare for when the male comes. 

Your family always sent you out late, hoping you would get taken.

Today their dreams would come true but not in the way they wanted.

“THE PIRATE KING HAS ARRIVED!! RUN AND HIDE!!”

All you heard was screaming and chaos that usually happened, you moved at your  normal pace, the wood in your arms as you headed back home.

But something told you to turn around, and you don’t know what it was but it was enough to make you drop the wood. Your eyes scanned the area before landing on a male coming onto the pier from a large and beautiful vessel. He had half and half hair, one side black and the other side blonde with pretty brown eyes. He only wore a button down shirt with the top three buttons undone, slacks and boots, everything adorned with gold and other accessories.

You were stunned, this couldn’t possibly be the King of the seas, you were expecting someone more on the rough and tumble side, someone ugly and disheveled. 

The Pirate King’s eyes met yours, a smirk coming on to his face. Your eyes got wide and a blush came across your face as you saw him beckon you, the simple curl of his finger brought you to him.

You didn’t even listen to the people around you in the village, trying to stop you. Hell you couldn’t stop, it was like you were in a trance, being drawn to the mysterious male.

You finally stopped when you finally got in front of him, he walked up to you and placed his hand under your chin, lifting it so you could look him in the eyes.

“A pretty little thing like you willingly walking up to me? Didn’t your parents warn you about the bad guys like me?” His voice was like butter, smooth and clear. “Yea, but they don’t care about me. They were hoping that you would come and get me.” You said and this made him tilt his head in confusion.

 “You look confused, Yea many families don’t care about their daughters, they only want to marry them away. I didn’t want it, so they treat me like shit.” He stood confused,  This was new for the feared pirate captain, a young woman, willing to go with him and his crew, just to escape the family life she was living. He couldn’t believe it. 

But when he looked into this girl's eyes, he couldn’t find any source of lying. No joking, nothing, just seriousness and hurt. 

How could a family treat their daughter like this?

He decided he was going to do something.

“Hongjoong”

“Huh?...”

“Call me Hongjoong. Take me to your home. Now.”

You nodded and took his hand, guiding him to your home. Hongjoong walked alongside you, looking around the area. The dirty looks the people were giving you just because you were holding his hand was awful. He could see why you would just throw yourself at him. He would do the same thing if this was his home life.

When you reached home, you opened the door only to be grabbed by your hair and thrown to the ground. You look up and see your mother with a belt, beginning to strike you. 

“You stupid whore! You were told to come straight home after getting the wood! Can’t you do anything right!?” You braced yourself for the hit she was gonna give you, you didn’t feel anything at all, you looked up to see Hongjoong holding the belt. He snatched it from your mother and shoved her to the ground before helping you up.

Your mother was about to say something until she realized who she was talking to. She backed up as Hongjoong took you into his arms, “Seonghwa.” You looked and saw another male appear behind Hongjoong. He was just as handsome as Hongjoong, hair slicked back with a matching suit to his leader. Seonghwa walked around him and jerked your mother up off the ground.

“Tell the others to come in and round up everyone in this house. I want them on their knees.”

You stood by his side, eyes wide open as his arm snaked around your waist, he kept a firm grip on you as you saw several other males walk through your house. They all were dressed in the same attire with various little different things to establish their position or roles (or that’s what you assumed it was for.)

Soon they had your father and siblings, all of them tied up and thrown to the ground beside your mother. Hongjoong smirks and looks down at them. “Well, Well, Well…you look so pitiful down there. How does it feel to be your daughter?” He started, before pulling out a gun, twirling it in his hands.

Your father looked with wide eyes before looking at you. “Wait, you want her? You’re taking the burden off my hands??” Your father says and you only rolled your eyes at his arrogance. Only he would still act high and mighty when he’s still face to face with danger. Hongjoong chuckles before aiming the gun and firing, shooting your father square in between the eyes. 

You felt the blood splatter slightly against your face, you just stared blankly at your fathers dead body on the ground. One part of you was afraid, scared at the man who just shot your father in front of your family. The other part was relieved, you were free from this man who treated you like shit. And you finally felt as if you had a sense of concern.

Hongjoong chuckled before placing the gun in your hands, wrapping one of his hands around it to guide you point it at your mother. “Isn’t this the woman you said treated you so wrong?..” He whispered into your ear, a devilish smirk on your face. “Who filled you with lies about me, when I can offer a better life…who hides you away from the world. Tell you that you’re nothing.”

“Stop with your silver tongue!! You’re lying to my daughter, theres nothing you can offer her than I can not give her!” Your mother yelled and Hongjoong looked at her with a raised eyebrow. Hongjoong sighed before moving away from you, leaving you with the gun aimed at your mother. “Well, I’ll let her decide..you can decide..right (Y/n)~?”

Your hands trembled as you looked down at your mother and siblings. You think back on all the pain and suffering that you were caused because of them. The names, the beatings, being made fun of because you didn’t want to be tied down and forced into a life that you didn’t want.

“Y-y/n please…i’m so sorry! I promise i’ll be a better mother, i was just doing what your father asked of me!”

“No! Mother is lying! It was all her idea! She’s just trying to save her own ass!!”

“She’s too stupid to use a  gun, you’ll be fi-”

A bang was heard and your brother slumped to the floor, bullet through his head just like your dad. But this time, it was your own hand that did it. No help from Hongjoong at all.

The captain behind you smirks and places a hand on your shoulder, “Now come on, my little treasure. We don’t need these type of people.” You give a blank stare to her before turning to leave with him, he chuckles and leans down to you. 

“You’re making the right decision darling..”

Hongjoong then moves to look at Seonghwa and San, one of his members of the crew, who delt with most of combat and other things regarding violence.

“San..You brought gunpowder right?..”

“Yea, why?”

Hongjoong leads you out with Seonghwa before mouthing the words.

“Burn it down.”

"Wait are you serious?"

Hongjoong looks at you before looking back to San.

"Burn this motherfucker down. I wanna see the flames from my ship. let that be a message if there's any survivors."

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