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hastyprovocateur · 1 year

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Girlfriend Ellie Headcanons

Cw- mature content, sexual themes

• Ellie's diffident, quiet ways lead many to think she's pensive or moody but honestly, she just needs to know you won't get weirded out when she finally gets comfortable and immediately begins goobing out over the neotibicen linnei life cycle and types of acrylic glazes. One smile does it for her. Suddenly, she's scooted close to you on the couch, knees grazing yours as she ignores the rest of the room.

• She'll let you touch her tattoo, describing the idea behind it, how little it hurt, how it healed, lost in conversation with you. It goes from pyramids to chapstick, nothing's off the table with Ellie Williams and her favourite person. She'll share earphones with you, listening to her favourites Bon Jovi, The Police, Smiths and Aerosmith under a starry sky.

Watch out, she belts Fiona Apple and Kate Bush.

• It's something in your eyes that lets her know not to hold back and hold back, she won't. She has to hover around you now. A big mistake was thinking Ellie has game which she does if having game meant something entirely else. She will act a fool to get noticed by you, cracking lame jokes, mock imitating you, fiddling with your straps and buttons and butting into your sentences just to draw your ire slash attention.

• Will bring you a pair of scissors, requesting that you cut her hair for her but really she just needs to feel your hands in her hair, stroking through the knots, brushing them, fluffing them up before soaking them, holding each lock taut before you run the scissors across their ends. She'll let the length and style be upto you. As long as it's not a fuss to take care of. Will gauge your reaction after you're done.

Do the layers make you want to ride me like a slut?

• Ellie establishes affection through touch. Patting your hip while taking a group photo, grazing your back while helping you pick a box of supplies up, leaving her hand on your ankle a little too long after tying your laces, mindlessly coiling your loose strands, holding your wrist to catch her breath from a fit of laughs, or even scratching off paint from your chest which she accidentally flicked on you.

• Yes, she paints, doodles, sketches around you. Even better, she draws stuff for you to colour in whenever you get bored and demands you pose for her or act as a live figure sample, angling your face and drooping your hand and arranging your fingers to let her sketch it out.

• One night, you tempt her enough to paint you topless, her finger quivering ever so slightly and her breath hitching as she switched her eyes between your blushing breasts and her aged paper. She was clinging onto your initial excuse for dear life:-

Well, we're both girls...

• She will do everything to the point of teaching you how to kiss BUT ask you out and dare to act confused when you take her by the collars, pinning her back on her bed, begging her to quit stalling and ask you out already. She, of course, acts like she knew all along. Joking about how you broke first, earning her first Ellie-being-annoying chuck under the chin from you.

• Will be incredibly smug about scoring you as a girlfriend because come on, total babe like you, the boys were practically shooting daggers at her. Ellie would pull you closer by the waist if you speak too animatedly with another comrade, kiss you on a whim, play with your bottom lip and hold your neck like she had you on a leash in public.

• She got off getting reprimanded by you, pinching your waist or slipping a hand into your back pocket or serenading you mid-task, dipping your head far back, giving you a juicy kiss before pulling you back up and walking off like nothing happened.

• Is a soft, gentle drunk. She'll want you by her side, guitar in hand as she sings a sweet song. Her eyes would be heavy, words slurring ever so lightly and she'd enunciate each word, dipping her head and looking up at you with a heartfelt smile whenever she felt like dedicating a line to you.

Shying away... I'll be coming for your love, okay?

• She will insist you wear her best flannels, that way you get to smell her and her shirts come back smelling like fresh detergent. It's a fair deal, Ellie protested mid smack but grew sombre, hugging and sniffing you with her eyes closed. No matter if it's been a long, sweaty, grimy day, Ellie would want to nuzzle into the crook of your neck, kiss, lick and sniff you till she's had her fill. She's keen enough to have figured out you smell different throughout the month, after a shower, falling asleep or waking up, she can tell the time of the day by your sweet, earthy scent.

• Her greatest turn-on was seeing you lounging in her sheets sporting just her shirt and nothing else. Ellie would hike the hem up your thigh, your belly, giving herself a first chair to your blossoming folds, watching them swell and soak with your charged back and forth. She'd eventually shut your smart quips up with a deft thumb pressing directly onto your rosebud.

• She figured out you went commando on one such outing and suddenly, she's a dog that found a bone in a bush once and is obligated to check in the same place everyday. No matter if it's inside, on patrols or communal gatherings, she'll pull you to the side and demand you unbuckle your pants and show her if you're wearing panties or not. She'll grow clingier and more touchy if she finds out you aren't.

Can't believe I've been replaced by a fucking seam...

#ellie x fem reader #ellie williams tlou #ellie williams #ellie williams smut #ellie williams blurb #ellie williams drabble #ellie williams tlou2 #ellie williams the last of us #ellie williams x female reader #ellie williams x reader #ellie williams x you #ellie tlou2 smut #ellie tlou2 #ellie tlou #tlou fanfiction #tlou smut #tlou2 headcanon #tlou2 smut #tlou drabble

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slutburn · 5 months

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siantmiller: POOR DEAR PAMELA played by Carey Mulligan in Emerald Fennell's @saltburnfilm

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Hair and Make-Up Design

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Supporting Pamela's vaguely masked misfortune, uncomfortably dressed from breakfast through to bedtime, my start point was the hair.

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It had to be red! Bold, out-there, a statement. Long enough, but not so as to compete with her clothes, soft but structured, kooky and eye catching. And it needed to work in the 'red' room when we first see Pamela in Saltburn.

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Karen Elson sprang to mind, with a pinch of Kate Bush and Florence Welch. Via Zoom, I met Carey during her filming commitments to Maestro, and discussed my mood board looks, Due to availability, our 1st and final fitting would be the day before filming.

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Carey's fabulous wig maker Jessica Lalande, sent me some colour samples to try out in the sets and against the costumes from Costume Designer, Sophie Canale. Once chosen, the wig was made, uncut, with plenty of length to work with.

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The make-up look was partly inspired by a Chanel campaign from 2007, our story setting. Further to this; looks with similar tones, which defined the eyes plus a hint of the 30's. Adding a wine coloured lip stain and super dark wine nails, which were pre-prepped and stuck on. I wanted Carey's brows to be well defined below her mid-forehead fringe, and with a touch of over extension. The roundedness of the eye makeup lending itself to her wide eyed, naive, doll like and slightly sorrowful demeanour.

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The tattoo designs have a deliberately hand-drawn quality, done by me using a Blackwing Matte pencil on cartridge paper, developed for in-house printing with ProCreate.

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These were inspired by many things including, Amy Winehouse, Russian mob ring tattoos, and nightmares of losing her teeth - which I took from Pamela's historical drug dependency. The Damien Hurst Pharmacy-era capsule tattoo, stems from a back story Carey and I devised, which references a past relationship Pamela had with a rock star from The Verve 'R•ash'. The 'Lucky' horseshoe is my nod to @luckychap

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Brilliant application by

@andrewsimonin wig & cut ❤️@sarakramer_makeup ❤️

#poor dear pamela #so funny that’s what she’s referred to as in everything #saltburn #carey mulligan

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omgvalhalla · 1 year

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Instinctual stack: sexual

Sx is about having a strong awareness of your own genetic fingerprint. Whether it’s sx-dom or sx-aux. An intuitive grasp of how to present the ME-ness, or the SELF-ness. Also neuroticism with being considered sexually attractive hence shooting yourself in the foot when there’s someone you actually like. An sx-user likely has a precise explanation of what a tattoo expresses in terms of being deeply personal. An sx-blind might explain they simply liked it, or how it was a rite of passage of sorts (thereby having connected to their weak sx).

It’s not about “looking pretty” or “looking sexy”. Cher (sx/sp) wearing crop tops throughout her entire career, when it wasn’t fashionable whatsoever. Amy Winehouse (sx/soc) and her fifties pin up look singing jazz when neither of that was fashionable. Kate Bush (so/sx) whose expression and musical style paved the way for others. In a way, sx is about expressing your genes. As a rule of thumb, sx-blinds are more attractive in the conventional sense compared to sx-dom: Henry Cavill and Sam Heughan sp/soc and David Bowie or Mick Jagger sx/soc. Megan Fox is not an sx-dom, rather soc/sp with a lot of movie industry sexy going on, compare with P!nk sp/sx.

#sx/soc #sx/sp #sp/sx #so/sx #sp/so #so/sp #enneagram #instinctualstack #instinctual variants

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blorbocedes · 2 years

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Curious about your thoughts, which drivers would rock wearing the following:

a) crop tops

b) short skirts

c) thigh high boots

d) lingerie

Thank you! Your mind is a gift to humankind!!

*kate bush voice* if I only could...

I'd make all the drivers ONLY wear that and nothing else, but alas!

okay, let's see. fuck James Corden but we can all admit the Daniel and Lando crop tops were a slay!! like this was a MOMENT (also put lando in a short skirt he keeps trying to pull down)

like there was slayage!!!

I need mick dorito proportion schumacher in a fitted crop top!!!! maybe even a corset!!!! he needs to serve

charl... NEED him in TEENY TINY skirt.... maybe also lace him up in a corset i don't mind. maybe those backless tiktok butterfly tops??

Estebestie is so tall..... but I need him in thigh high boots. i need him laced him up in 6 inch heels and STUMBLING like a baby deer... legs for dayssssss but giving season 1 of ANTM where they have to runway walk on water...

Maxy~

let's get him in a Victoria's Secret pushup bra, really accentuate the girls!!!!! maybe some booty shorts that say simply lovely 🥰

Alex posted GR in lingerie which was cursed but I kind of don't hate the idea of super uppity posh George Russell in a white collar shirt and business casual being in strappy lingerie underneath. also he's wearing a sheer coverup that hides Nothing and Alex yells at him to wear a shirt

SPEAKING OF SHEER

whenever lewis is in something sheer and his back tattoos are on display? im putting a baby inside him. im doing it. he's going to carry it🥵🥵🥵🥵 I need him in a white full body lingerie Set. heels. i know he had his cute little Harry Styles ugly skirt for a magazine cover moment but ever since lewis said he'd be down to rupaul's drag race I've been imagining styling him:...... and the accessories!?! ugh he'll be the prettiest thing

Pierre... I kinda wanna see him in pearls and only pearls kinda like the Kim K "you're doing amazing sweetie" playboy photoshoot. i have a Vision... I can see it......

also I kinda wanna see zhou guanyu in heels... I think he could pull it off in a high fashion way too... there would be slayage...

#f1 grid #I get to dress them up yay thank you for this ask!!!#Daniel Ricciardo #lando norris #max verstappen #lewis hamilton #george russell #zhou guanyu #pierre gasly #esteban ocon #Charles Leclerc #the grid as #blorbocedes ask #put them all in skirts and heels and lingerie and crop tops

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miradorjake · 4 months

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thank you @silverfoxlou (😚) for the tag <3

my top 9 albums of 2023 to no surprise 😌

plural - electric guest 💐 literally this album is spring to me, ‘over’ is one of my favorite songs and it’ll never not be able to calm me down 🫶🏻

starcatcher - gvf 🌌 no comment because I think everyone knows what this album did for me and yet again I would not be here without it 🫂

the gods we can touch - aurora 🌹 pure comfort and every time I listen i’m suddenly in snow under the northern lights 🫂

2112 - rush 🌃 also comforting because my dad had this on repeat all of my childhood and I rediscovered it last year and it means everything to me 😔

faith in the future - louis 🌷 got me through not one but two years 🧍🏻‍♀️still deciding which lyric to get tattooed 🫂

the age of the understatement - tlsp 💃🏻 literally this album will never get old ever I need everyone to listen asap 😳

mondo - electric guest 🌺 this is still my favorite album of all time perhaps like troubleman is still one of my favorite songs 😔

the battle at garden’s gate - gvf ⛲️ once an album saves your life, it stays with you 🫂

hounds of love - kate bush ☁️ childhood and comfort <3

I will tag @runwayblues @shutupdevvie @ascendingtostardust @theweightofstardust @joshsindigostreak @wideminded-dreamer @heavens-hearken

#mwuah <3

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geminipdf · 7 months

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#i will be torturing u guys with this poll <3 #also rb this!#personal

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saltbind · 8 months

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Happy WW Will!! Gimme the femslash headcanons👀 how do Samantha & Deanna differ from Sam & Dean? Do they act differently in bed? Do they get together earlier or later than their boy counterpoints? Etc etc

okie okie okie so first off: deanna is rockin that ripped band tee mullet thing most of the time. she looks like a dyke and she knows it and she rocks it. she gets away with it because she's also genuinely stunning, and when she does have to dress up it's a whole Thing. mostly for her it's a joan jett style inspo kinda thing. sammy is more inspired by kate bush and shirley manson. tattoo chokers, midriff tops, layered shirts, box dye, nails done with sharpie.

dean's largely the same - she's pretty masc, but she's validated by the way john supports that and her femininity is expected here because she's a cis woman, so she's actually way less insecure. sam's assertiveness in later years isn't pushed back on as much because she's the baby and it's a lot harder for john to stay mad at a teenage girl (and easy for him to blame the hormones when shit gets particularly heated).

deanna i think would be even more of a pillow princess. like, don't get me wrong, she knows how to please a partner, but she also likes to be directed. it's very at odds with how she looks but she's good at it and she's smug about how good she is, which really works for her. her nails are all short anyway, but her index and middle are kept brutally short, because of course they are.

she prefers sleeping with women over men, but will occasionally get the craving for real dick instead of a strap and will either find a nice trans woman to give it to her or an older dude in a bar who's into her more 'natural' look.

sam's the kinda girl who lives up to the whole 'quiet ones are kinky' thing. she's more open to sharing about her sex life with deanna, since culturally that's more acceptable, but she pretty quickly finds that even tho she has a lot less sex than deanna the sex she's having is more interesting. she has no particular preference as to gender and so sleeps with a lot more men than deanna does, so sometimes will actually be the one giving advice on the matter in a twist on the dynamic.

their psychosexual closeness starts about the same age as their dude-selves, but again, because of societal bullshit it gets excused a lot more. and they get properly together a lot earlier because they never stop sleeping in the same bed, because it doesn't ever seem inappropriate. they never grow out of it.

(john has an uncomfortable moment when they watch ginger snaps as a family one night when he's not on a hunt where he Recognises The Dynamic but he pretty forcefully pushes it out of his head).

#ask box #deanwinchesterpregnant #samdean #sam winchester #dean winchester #femchesters #wincest wednesday

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tellevangeline · 2 months

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(Photo of me and my husband by @mettieostrowski on insta)

Caroline Polachek as a Sociological Phenomena and why it’s Important to Gatekeep Twinks.

So there I was (picture unrelated) waiting for the train at 10:30 PM on a Sunday so I can go take some extra estradiol from a generous friend at a gay bar, full incognito, wearing a fucking hoodie, I’m so tired I spent all day working on the flier for my new absurdist drag bingo because I and everyone I know are walking parodies of bushwick transexuals.

Train is taking forever so I have some time to kill, and I decide (d? Should I care about continuity? I am not a writer, I’m an author.)

Anyway I decided to put the recent Caroline Polachek album on, which is big for me because I have been a bit of a Caroline Polachek denier. I listened to Chairlift very casually when I was a teenager but I was far from die hard and since then I’ve kind of just thought of her as an unfortunate but all too common case of a talented musician being so aggressively HAIM-Pilled that it’s practically deafening. I say this as a dyke with love for all dykes❤️

Also the “new queen of artpop” claims coming from the exact type of 5’8 naturally dirty blonde he/they’s I’ve made it my life goal to disagree with at all times are really not helping her case for me.

Because here’s my thing. I’m a Kate Bush ride or die, surprising I know. I have I’ve always been a coward tattooed below my collarbones like the only 1% I’ll ever be a part of is her Spotify listeners.

But here’s the tea, if you’re not ready and willing to hee haw like a fucking donkey on a song that’s probably about some form of domestic abuse you just aren’t the new queen of artpop. I do make the rules and to be honest the only people in pop music right now not named lady fucking gaga who has the panache, the gaul, the unwavering commitment to pull stunts and shenanigans on that level are Ethel Cain and Lingua Ignota, especially since FKA Twigs decided she wanted to live a happy and fulfilling life (and good for her, thank you for all the good times queen)

And Caroline is simply not there, she’s too squeaky clean and widely appealing to go to those absurd and ugly places that make a Bjork.

Now my personal cocomelon/surrogate father figure Anthony Fantano the Internet’s Busiest Music Nerd did love her album, and I usually agree with his takes (mbdtf is mid you just love it because it was baby’s first concept album and you have a deep yearning to return to a time in your life where you first realized music could be art) BUT WHILE I AGREE WITH MANY OF HIS TAKES (sorry) my one glaring exception is that he never takes how cunt something is into consideration while evaluating a piece of music, and by that I do mean that he said gaga peaked at fame monster and 212 is the only good azealia banks song. He doesn’t have the tools to engage with music in a fag like manor, so when we’re dealing with music for gays, I don’t trust him.

And then last night I saw a Drag Queen named The Illustrious Pearl perform welcome to my island as a showgirl vampire wearing rhinestoned knee pads and frankly if Caroline is good enough for her she’s certainly good enough for me.

And I’m gonna be really vulnerable here, I really enjoyed the album. Like, there’s about as much art in it’s pop as cranberry in a gay bar vodka cran but it’s damn good pop and the art adds a nice little aftertaste.

I believe is definetely my favorite, those Rhythm Nation/Mortal Kombat ass synth hits always make me convulse (America Has A Problem is my favorite track off Renaissance) (it took me a whole 2 minutes to spell renaissance right) but I also like welcome to my island a lot and I at least liked everything else except for Billions which sounds like a song that was rejected from The Sensual World because Kate would never release a song that non-violent.

But it was cute. I have a meeting with a literal church upstate that is trying to book me for their pride drag show tomorrow and one of them just texted me “Brainstorming with the Holy Spirit is so exciting and so fruitful ✝️💜✝️) and I believe those synth hits on I Believe will carry me through my challenges tomorrow. Love Down.

Xoxo

-Evangeline

#caroline polachek #gay twink #bushwick #does tumblr have an algorithm now?

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katherinewilliams221b · 6 months

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Our Time To Bloom

Chapter 7: The Serch Bythol

<Previous Chapter - All Chapters - Masterlist

Summary: Two months after the war, the couple is more distant than ever. Kate accompanies her grandfather on a trip to Ireland, where her past and present will collide in unexpected ways. Charlie stays in Romania with a decision to make: will he follow her and uncover all unsaid things? Romance/Drama /Mystery

Rating: Mature

Pairing: Charlie Weasley/Kate Williams (hphm mc, original female character) established relationship

7th, July, 1998

Hours later, after dropping off Kate at the station, Charlie perched himself against a wooden fence at the dragon sanctuary. Lost in thought, he observed as Soule, an older Romanian Longhorn, stretched its wings in the air. The dragon flew in circles, pirouetting through the clouds with the bravest birds joining in its dance.

What a coward you have been, mate, not to join in. And what a fool! You wanted to go! You still do... Bernard has both great humour and profound wisdom, maybe he was the right person to talk to. If you want to talk... Simply trying to pronounce Fred’s name out loud makes your throat close up.

Soule walked past the Sun creating his silhouette in the wind for an instant.

A twinge in his knee made him hiss, and suddenly the smell of smoke invaded his nostrils.

‘It’s normal in the sanctuary,’ he reminded himself, but he couldn’t help but find himself on Hogwarts’ ground, lying on the stones and feeling that same smell.

He clung tightly to the fence, unable to move. The image of the man appearing out of the fire, distorted, only his silhouette visible when lit from behind, slipped into his mind without permission. He had hit him in the knee, fortunately, but at that moment, helpless on the ground, he knew the stranger would not miss a second time.

He struggled to steady his breathing and with difficulty set his sights on the mountains in the distance. He imagined waterfalls and rivers, crystal-clear lakes and the reflection of clouds in their waters, paths overlooking the valley, patches of flowering bushes.

He managed to shake off the vision of his near-death by trying to imagine himself flying, soaring through the skies on a dragon. With the wind in his face and breathing clean air, seeing the world disappearing and getting smaller and smaller and smaller and smaller...

“You’re making my dragons nervous...”

A light tap on the shoulder accompanied the voice, which was just enough to make Charlie flinch and turn away from Sonia, bringing his hand to his hip unconsciously reaching for his wand.

“Sorry.” She said with sincerity in her eyes before leaning against the fence.

Charlie brought his hand to his hair, briefly massaging his head and undoing the small ponytail he wore. He leaned back against the wood next to his group leader.

They both stood in silence for a while, just watching the sky. Charlie’s heart started beating normally again, and he was able to take a deep breath. Still, he brought his hand to his opposite arm and started stroking his inner elbow with his thumb.

“Nervous?” Sonia asked without looking at him. “The lists go out the day after tomorrow.” She added at the look she saw out of the corner of her eye.

“A little.”

“The grant is yours, I have no doubt. And Razvan’s too. You are both very capable.” She said with a small smile.

“We’ll see if the folks at Apuseni feel the same way.”

“I’m sure they will.”

Absently, Charlie continued to make circles on his skin.

“Cool tat,” Sonia commented, looking at the pale skin on his arm. “I haven’t seen it on you before.”

“Oh...” He pulled his hand away to reveal the symbol he wore inked in black. “We only got it done last year...”

Sonia raised her eyebrows.

“Kate and I.”

“Damn. That’s bold. I don’t think I could get matching tattoos with a boyfriend. It’s usually contraindicated.” She laughed, coaxing a small smile from Charlie.

“Yeah, well, they’re not permanent. The guy who did it to us can take them off, too.” It dawned on Charlie that this was the first time anyone had noticed the symbol he was wearing, and that no one but Kate knew of its existence. Not even Razvan.

He moved a little closer to her, extending his left arm so she could see better, and began to follow the lines with his pinky.

“It is, in theory, a Celtic symbol made of two Trinity knots flipped to the side and fused together.” He traced the intricate lines from the horizontally pointing tips to the central circle. “The three points of the knots represent the soul: mind, body and spirit, as well as the circle of life. The two knots maintain their individuality, but when intertwined, they create a perfect circle, symbolising the endless unity between two souls.” He recited as he had been told. He focused on the dragons again, less solemn, remembering with a smile the tale they were told when that man was tattooing Kate.

“It’s really just one interpretation, there’s no factual information about it that we know,” he chuckled" but we loved that story so much we adopted it as our own."

When Sonia didn’t comment on it, he kept going,

“It’s called a Serch Bythol. In Celtic Welsh language, serk means Love, and beeth-ohl means everlasting.”

“I wouldn’t have imagined in a million years that you two were corny as hell!” They shared a laugh at her teasing. Charlie was grateful that she took the weight out of his words.

“Oh, come on, be easy on me, boss, I’m opening my heart for you here.” He said half-joking.

“Yeah, yeah, whatever.” They chuckled again, watching as Soule landed on a tree. “I don’t suppose you got it one night completely smashed in some dude’s basemen…”

“No! Of course not!” He laughed.

“Right…”

“No, we…” he tapped it again absent-mindedly, “it was purely for practical reasons, I assure you.”

He stared at the black ink, praying for it to stay black.

“When the other is in danger, it glows red.”

A look of understanding erased the smirk on Sonia’s eyes. She avoided his stare, focusing on the landscape ahead.

“I always wondered how you knew… That you had to leave Romania that day.”

It scared me so much, the way it burned, he thought. I didn’t know where she was until I received her letter. It didn’t have an envelope or a seal. I couldn’t even recognise her handwriting.

He nodded.

A moment of silence passed between them and left Charlie contemplating his future, his plans. Seeing Soule come down from the sky to take a nap by the rocks made him realise he wasn't meant for anything else. This was the life he hoped for in his teens, and the life he wanted to cultivate. If not dragons, what else? But did it need to be in Romania?

These mountains were his dream since he was a child and he was comfortable here, perhaps too much. He wondered if leaving this place, this group of people he could now call friends would feel like a betrayal. To them and himself.

But then he thought of her.

She had worked as hard as him to get into St Mungo’s hospital as a mere apprentice. And she left for him. To follow him here. She got far as a healer in Bucharest’s hospital. And she left for a cause she believed in. She had been offered a position as a herbology teacher once. And she declined for the same reason.

Maybe it was time to return the favour.

Perhaps, after the Apuseni program, if he was chosen to go, it could be the last thing Romania could offer him and that dream he had as a child wasn’t the end of the line but the beginning.

Before the war, they hadn’t discussed much about their plans for a future away from this place, they both had secure positions, a home and they were content with that. He never dared to dream further from that.

Then the war happened, and they were forced to do things they never imagined they could be capable of. And that tranquil life they had shattered along with their possibilities.

Now that it was over, he thought, after everything that they went through, it was time for new dreams.

Kate was in the picture, he used to be sure of it. Now, he hoped.

“Sonia…”

“Hm?” She began putting on her fireproof gloves.

“May I get… some time off?”

The dragon tamer stared at him with an unreadable expression. She seemed to be registering his question as confusion appeared on her face.

“You shouldn’t. Not right before the program starts.”

“After that, it may be too late.” She kept silent and continued to secure her gear. “I think,” he insisted, “I could catch up later, I’m sure. I’m a fast learner. Two weeks tops.”

“Two weeks!”

“Sonia, please. I never take breaks, you know this. I never even quit when all of that happened,” he added, referring to the war. She sighed.

“I know. I just don’t want you to lose this opportunity.”

“I won’t.”

She thought for a moment and then clicked her tongue. “At least stay until the first day.”

“Of course!”

“Hey!”

Both dragonologists turned at the sound of Razvan’s voice, who flew towards them with a frown.

“Am I the only one who works around here or what? We’re supposed to start the scouting in three minutes!”

“Yes,” Sonia added with a nod towards Charlie, “let’s go.”

Muddy and sweaty, Charlie apparated in front of his house after an afternoon in the forest. He took off his boots before entering the cabin and made his way to the bathroom for a warm and much needed shower.

After cleaning himself, he stepped out of the bathtub in time to hear scratches on the other side of the door.

“Just wait a moment, Grimoire!”

Charlie imagined the condescending expression of Kate’s cat as it sat in their bedroom.

He opened the door with a towel around his hips just so the animal would stop the assault at the door.

“When Kate’s not here, you become an insufferable pain in the ass.” He accused, changing into a shirt and tracksuit bottoms. Grimoire mewled, clearly letting him know that the sentiment was mutual.

After satiating both appetites, Charlie left the cabin and, using a ladder, checked the rooftop for any sign of Whiskey.

He found the owl sound asleep in the small wooden house he had built for him. The redhead frowned and checked his watch. It was late.

While climbing down, he reminded himself that it meant nothing that Kate hadn’t sent a letter. She was probably having fun with her grandpa. Right?

“Yes. She arrived safe and sound.” He said to Grimoire as he entered again.

He made his way to the kitchen counters, hoping that the routine of putting a kettle on would calm his nerves. He instantly felt better as soon as the tea touched his lips, but the nervousness of what would he say to her and, most importantly, how would she react to seeing him there, remained.

Stopping the spiralling train of thought, he gasped.

Her birthday!

He used to be more thoughtful than that, he thought, but the stress of the war and going back to tons of work at the reserve had left him with no energy to think about presents.

The incorporation to the Apuseni program, if that ever happened, would leave him no time to search for something appropriate. He only had tomorrow to figure it out.

Against all odds and without warning, Grimoire jumped on the seat next to him and, tentatively, rested his head on Charlie’s thigh.

“I know,” he sighed, scratching behind the cat’s ear, “I miss her too. You’ll be fine here on your own? I guess you must. Razvan will come, you know him, to check on you.”

He paused, sipping his tea.

“I don’t even know where to start with her…”

He would get to… Cobh? But where exactly? And even if he found her, how would he manage to put in order the things he should say?

Eyeing the coffee table, he saw some random papers scattered around. With a flick of the wrist, a quill and inkwell floated towards him as he set the cup down. With a determined breath, he started writing.

My dearest,

I don’t know if I will have the courage to show you this letter. Maybe I’ll burn it after I’m finished, maybe I will hide it until I’m ready, or maybe I will be able to speak my mind to your face. You deserve as much, and so much more.

My heart stings every time I come home at night. I watch the lights on the tower where you hide from me and I feel as a failure for not being able to reach you. You’ve closed your mind, only to me? Do I hurt you so that you’ve kept your thoughts to yourself?

I talk to Razvan sometimes, about you and I, about what happened, about Fred if my voice doesn’t betray me. He listens, he tries, and I’m grateful to have found a little solace in his friendship, but he is not the person I burn to reconnect with again.

I miss my best friend, my companion.

Is it because I remind you of your own brother, Jacob, that you can’t find it in your heart to speak to me?

I hear you cry some nights. I know about your nightmares. Often I hold you, selfishly hoping you will wake and hug me back. I don’t know what haunts your dreams, I can imagine, but it feels strange in my stomach that you can’t trust me how you used to.

I guess I’ve been guilty of that too, but for different reasons. There is no one else I would trust with my life but you, but I’m afraid I’ve become a burden to you. I find it difficult to know where I stand, where the limits are, how I should act around you.

But I’ve learnt today, the hard way, after seeing you part from me for the umpteenth time and after observing the creatures that roam these mountains, that my approach has been completely off.

You are not a dragon. Never have been and never will. They come and go or they don’t, they can fly, spit fire, the most absolute chaos can burst in any second, destroying everything around them. To be on good terms with them again, you need to sit still and wait. Make yourself as little of a threat as possible.

But you, my love, you are a feline, and cats can sense when one is not confident enough to handle them. So they scurry away. A change of attitude it’s what’s needed or you’ll just see their tails as they leave the room.

All of this to say I hope you will forgive me.

Once I told you, as you lay in my arms, I whispered to you it would be only fair to follow where you lead.

And now I intend to keep my promise, because it was one, whether you know it or not.

Although I should have been quicker to say it,

I accept your offer, if you’ll have me, and I’ll reunite with you in Ireland if I manage to find where you are.

If after these weeks you still seek a life away from here without me, at least I’ll know that my last decision regarding you wasn’t a disappointment or one that I’ll regret.

But for all it’s worth, I want to start dreaming with you again.

With all the love I can possibly keep in my heart,

Charlie.

Before folding the letter, and with utmost care, he drew with his quill a Serch Bythol at the end of the page, hoping she would understand the meaning behind it.

His heart felt lighter, somehow, having put into words his intentions and motives and, he realised as he lifted the quill, that he hoped for her to read it. When the envelope was closed, he placed a kiss on it.

With Grimoire’s head resting on his thigh and a steaming cup in hand, he stared out of the window, watching the trees sway with the wind. He took a deep breath and enjoyed for the first time in months a quiet afternoon in solitude.

A/N. A short one but very much needed, if anyone still cares :) It’s hard writing these days

Next chapter >

#charlie weasley #charlie weasley fanfiction #charlie weasley x jacob's sibling #charlie weasley x oc #charlie weasley x ofc #charlie weasley x kate williams #ottb #our time to bloom

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queenofcarrotflowers-s · 7 months

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hello~ I am returning to tumblr, the place of my youth, after a good few years away. this feels like a homecoming in a weird way because tumblr had such a big impact on myself and my identity growing up, and honestly I haven't had a place I could explore my thoughts in the same way in awhile. but my dash has become quite dead while I was gone so I'm looking for new mutuals/people to follow.

(also, if we've been mutuals and you're still here and you see this, please feel free to say hey!)

so let me (re-)introduce myself—my name is mikayla or mik (she/they is cool), and I am 28 years old and a public librarian + union steward in my daily life. I'm bi and currently living with my sweet partner of three-and-a-half years. we have two cats that I deeply adore, named snickers and lorelei. snickers is a big, beautiful former cat beauty pageant runner-up and lorelei is a tiny gal who was rescued from the streets as a teen mom. caring for them gives me so much purpose in my life and I don't know where I'd be without them! anyways, let me pay the cat tax:

(left: lorelei, right: snickers—in a rare moment of peace and camaraderie!)

I deal with chronic fatigue and other issues from an autoimmune thyroid disorder (Hashimoto's) and was recently diagnosed with anxiety/persistent depression/ADHD, which I mention here not because I think anyone wanted my entire medical history but because I hope to write about my experiences and possibly connect with others living with chronic illness, mental health struggles, and/or neurodiversity, as well.

current interests under the cut! if you're into any of the same things, please feel free to reach out / follow! I'd love to meet some new moots/friends :~)

some of my current interests include: cross-stitch/embroidery, latch hook rug-making, creative reuse art, art journaling, cats, libraries, dollhouse miniatures, zumba fitness, union organizing, socialism/communism, thrifting and antique/vintage collecting, interior design and organization, cryptids, folk art, graphic novels, tattoos (I currently have 19), podcasts & audiobooks, dungeons & dragons, country line dancing (I went to one queer country dance party and am now obsessed lol)

video games: baldur's gate 3 (hyperfixating hard on this one rn), disco elysium, paradise killer, stardew valley, animal crossing: new horizons

tv shows: what we do in the shadows, beastars, sex education, yellowjackets, abbott elementary, stranger things, the boys, i think you should leave, the bear, cutthroat kitchen, good eats, tuca & bertie, bojack horseman, black mirror, toast of london, rupaul's drag race, the good place, schitt's creek

authors: grady hendrix, jeanette winterson, lisa hanawalt, michael deforge, lucy knisley, box brown, agustina bazterrica, patricia polacco, brian k. vaughan, sylvia plath, mary roach, caitlin doughty, patricia lockwood, haruki murakami

music: andrew bird, kate bush, yebba, weyes blood, bright eyes, lucy dacus, fleet foxes, remi wolf, fiona apple, hozier, benny sings, gus dapperton, orville peck, father john misty, dolly parton, loretta lynn, madison cunningham, mac miller, the decemberists, the magnetic fields, ABBA, cheekface, wild child, chappell roan, the chicks, villagers, fleece, the growlers, peach pit

podcasts: and that's why we drink, beach too sandy water too wet, ridiculous crime, dimension 20, behind the bastards, welcome to night vale, last podcast on the left, sounds like a cult

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