#just this really nice dude who's still really nice but also has like a fifteen step plan with five backups cause he Must Dominate Paintball | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

origamiplushie · 2 months

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Dustin's really going through it

Read on AO3. Inspired by this tumblr post.

It is an ordinary Friday like any other. The party is once again gathered in the Wheeler’s basement. They’re just having a normal sleepover not playing DND so even Max has elected to join them. They have a pile of snacks and soft drinks, they’ve picked out some movies to watch later and right now they’ve given in to stereotype and are playing truth or dare.

So far Max has admitted to shoplifting (multiple times) (with very little shame), Will has demonstrated that he can do a handstand but only hold it for about 20 seconds, Lucas has been forced to chug a shaken bottle of coke and spent a tense fifteen minutes doing his best not to throw up and Dustin has confessed that he once destroyed a sweater his mom bought him and blamed it on Mews just so she couldn’t force him to ever wear him to wear it again.

Dustin spins the bottle and watches it slow down to land on Mike. He dramatically pretends to contemplate his choices for a moment before turning towards Mike and asking with a sly grin: “What is the most embarrassing crush you’ve ever had?”

Mike sputters angrily.

“None of your business!”

Dustin immediately shoots back with: “Actually we’re playing truth or dare so right now it is very much our business.”

“Shut up, I’m not telling you guys!”

“Come on dude, you forced me to show you pictures of the sweater! Fair’s fair!”

Will tries to goad Mike into telling them.

“Come on, Mike, it can’t be that bad?”

Max snorts and says: “Or at least not worse than Dustin in that puke coloured sweater.”

“Just rip off the bandaid and tell us already!”

“It’s Steve! It’s Steve, alright?” Mike finally exclaims. Immediately after that he slamms his face into his hands.

A moment of shocked silence follows.

And then Max starts laughing.

Seeing as Mike is clearly mortified, El leans over to pat him on his back.

“Steve is very handsome. And he is nice. I do not think he is an embarrassing boy to crush on,” she said.

Lucas decides to also try and reassure his friend.

“I mean, if I wasn’t dating Max and if I liked guys, I would probably also have a crush on Steve. He’s just like the whole package - he's athletic and charismatic and super supportive and a good listener, you know?”

Now Max, still laughing under her breath, adds: “Not just charismatic and nice, he’s hot! Have you seen him shirtless at the pool?”

Will, who so far had been struck speechless, turns entirely red in the face as he shyly nods and says: “I personally like watching when he plays basketball with Lucas.”

Mike looks like he feels a bit better and even dares to peek at the rest of the room through his fingers.

“For real?”

Lucas nods enthusiastically.

“Yeah dude, Steve’s a nice guy. Half the school probably has a crush on him.”

Mike isn’t hiding his face anymore but Dustin seems disturbed by the entire conversation.

“Nononono, fucking ew!Steve isn’t… hot. He’s a fucking doofus and a dork!”

They’re all laughing at Dustin’s distressed face now.

“You’re just mad your friends like your “older brother”,” Max chimes up.

Mike is confident enough by now to speak.

“Now you know how I felt when you were crushing on Nancy!”

After that all of Dustin’s protests are ignored as the group trades stories of Steve as well as their other crushes. Meanwhile Dustin tries to smother himself with a pillow and does his best to tune the whole conversation out.

—

Dustin doesn’t even give Eddie the chance to get out of the car and wave before he’s already throwing his bag in the back, sitting in and slamming the door closed.

“Soo… going out on a limb here, I’m guessing the sleepover didn’t go well?” Eddie says backing out of the Wheeler’s driveway.

“No! It didn’t! They all spent the whole evening basically gossiping and talking about some… dumb shit! We never even got to watching “Highlander”! It's new enough that it's still under the two day rental policy! And Steve said he’s not going to waive any more of my late fees! So I guess I’m going to have to drop this off today too. And when Steve asks ‘Oh Dustin, how was the movie? Were the swordfights as awesome as they looked on the box?’ I’m going to have to say ‘Well Steve, I never actually got to find out!’”

Dustin grosses his arms with a huff and glares out the window.

“That sucks dude. Did you tell them you wanted to watch the movie?”

“Yes! But apparently Mrs. Flemings is right when she complains that teens these days have no appreciation for art and culture!”

Eddie glances at Dustin sitting sullenly in the passenger seat and offers with a wink: “How about this? I’ll drive us to Family Video, rent the movie under my account after you’ve returned it and then we can hang out at my pace and watch it together. Then tomorrow you can tell the others how cool it was and what they were all missing out on by ignoring you.”

Dustin immediately brightens up.

“Really? Thanks, Eddie, you’re the best!”

“And hey, if we’re hanging out all day anyway, you might as well pick out another movie to watch as well. I don’t know about you but I don’t have any other plans for today.”

—

Dustin rushes to browse the shelves and pick a second movie while Eddie waits at the counter with the “Highlander” tape.

He personally prefers sci-fi above all but he knows Eddie likes horror movies, so it might be nice to go with something Eddie liked as a gesture of appreciation. He considers his options for a while. Finally, “Star Trek” is put back on the shelf and Dustin turns towards the counter with the “Shining”.

And then he stops.

Steve is leaning on his forearms against the counter.

Eddie is leaning forward as well, a strand of hair pulled in front of his face.

The two of them and Christopher Lambert staring up at them from the VHS case form a little triangle. They seem utterly oblivious to the rest of the world.

Eddie is definitely blushing.

Dustin takes a deep breath.

Steve and Eddie are reminded real quick that they are not alone in the universe when he starts yelling.

#stranger things #stranger things fic #steve harrington #implied steddie #eddie munson #dustin henderson #mike wheeler #my fic #yes eddie wanted to cheer dustin up but he also had ulterior motives for offering to go to family video

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hairstevington · 11 months

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flowers and ink (part 5)

Eddie Munson x Steve Harrington

Summary: Eddie and Steve go on their first date, kind of. Robin is there, but they still manage to find time alone. Especially after Eddie surprises Steve with an ace up his tattooed sleeve.

(part one, part two, part three, part four, link to Ao3)

Word Count: 2.8K

Warnings: Florist/Tattoo Artist trope, modern day AU, fluff af, FIRST KISS WOO, not to spoil lmao, first date, Platonic Stobin, Gareth is the moment

A/N: Lmao remember when this was gonna be 2 parts? HA! This one is kind of unhinged but I hope you like it. PS - There is a reference to a Djo song in here. Can you find it? Also, I cannot take credit for the line “clenched fist with hair.” I just rewatched The Haunting of Hill House and that description sends me. Enjoy!

Eddie wasn’t nervous. Why would he be nervous? He went to these kinds of shows at bars all the time. He was in his element, surrounded by people he knew. He had the power.

It was just a date. He’d been on a million of those. Well, he’d been on a few. He was less of a date kind of guy and more of a “let’s hang out and eventually we’ll just be in a relationship” kind of guy. Even still, it wasn’t like he had that much experience - especially as an adult.

“Dude, relax,” Gareth said with a light laugh.

Okay, he was nervous. He didn’t want to be, but it’s not like anybody can control their feelings. It had been a very long time since Eddie had felt so stupidly giddy about someone. And for it to be pretty-boy Steve of all people??

Eddie didn’t date people like Steve, generally. He dated, like, red flags in leather jackets. Shockingly, they never seemed to work out.

“It just feels different,” Eddie muttered, fully embarrassed by this whole thing.

“Munson,” Gareth deadpanned. “Have you ever considered maybe that’s a good thing?” Eddie chuckled.

“Yeah, probably,” he agreed. And then, a man and a woman who were absolutely not dating walked through the front door, and Eddie froze. “Oh shit. They’re here.”

Gareth practically tumbled over his drum set, knocking on a cymbal as he did so. He peered over Eddie’s shoulder so he could see better. They both stared, slack-jawed, at the pair across the room.

“Holy shit,” Gareth mumbled. “That’s - you - him?”

“Him,” Eddie confirmed.

How the fuck did this man make black jeans and a t-shirt look so good? There was a vibrancy and confidence to him that he didn’t usually have at work. Eddie was used to seeing Steve around all sorts of pretty flowers. Now he was surrounded by dark walls, sticky counters, and metalheads, and he somehow looked cool as shit despite being a little different from everyone else.

“Goddamn, Flower Boy’s a heartbreaker for sure,” Gareth said. He smacked Eddie on the back. “Go get him, tiger.”

“Are you nervous?” Robin asked as they walked into the bar.

“Actually, no,” Steve answered. “You?”

“Yeah, I’m really nervous to go on your first date with Eddie,” Robin replied sarcastically. “I’m fine, just figuring out my game plan, here.”

“Your game plan?”

“Yeah,” she said. “Like, I’m not going to just be right next to you the whole time, that would be weird. So I’ll have to find someone else to talk to, or pretend I have a UTI and go to the bathroom every five minutes or something.”

“Or you could just get a drink, enjoy the music…” Steve suggested playfully.

“Whatever,” Robin replied with a laugh. “Here he comes, don’t be an idiot!”

“Being an idiot is part of my charm,” Steve responded. He watched as Eddie weaved through the people at the bar, looking just as he always did. Which was, ya know, insanely hot.

“Steve, hi!” Eddie greeted him. There was a moment where neither of them knew if this was a handshake or a hug moment, but they recovered quickly (and evidently decided neither was appropriate). “Robin, nice to see you. The show starts in like fifteen minutes. Do you want a drink?” Robin and Steve nodded, and then the three of them were off to the bar.

Steve paid for all three of them, even though Eddie tried to pick up the tab at first. Steve just thought it was weird to have his date pay for him AND his emotional support lesbian. Once they were served, Robin gasped.

“Oh my god,” she said. “I just forgot I have to call my - my Aunt Shirley. She missed her flight and ended up having to drive in a rental car across the country with a total stranger, and I promised I’d check in.”

“Oooookay…” Eddie said. Robin flitted off, and Steve burst out laughing. “How much of that was a lie?”

“Well, she does have an Aunt Shirley,” Steve replied. “The rest was from a movie we watched last week.”

“Very nice,” Eddie grinned. “And subtle.”

“She’s good like that,” Steve replied, returning the smile.

They continued chatting about their days, then ended up on a tangent about video games. Talking to Eddie was easy. Fourteen minutes later, Robin came back.

“How’s our gal Shirley?” Eddie asked with a smirk. Robin chuckled.

“She’s good. The car got set on fire, so that’s a bummer, but she’ll figure it out,” she joked. The three of them laughed, and then the radio cut out, and the lights dimmed. Four men walked onto stage, and people in the crowd clapped. Eddie was cheering, so Steve did too.

“Hello everyone, we are Corroded Coffin,” the lead singer began. “- and we hope you get good and drunk tonight so that we sound even better.”

Laughter, then more cheering. Steve wasn’t really sure what he was in for, but then the music began, and he figured it out pretty quickly.

So, it was like, metal. Not Steve’s favorite, but that’s okay. He could practically feel Robin shrinking beside him though. She was really not a fan of the loud, angry stuff.

But truthfully, Steve didn’t care that much about the music. He cared more about Eddie next to him, and the way he was absolutely beaming.

“Are you a big fan of these guys or something?” Steve asked between songs.

“Something like that!” Eddie replied.

“I need to walk my dog!” Robin chimed in, disappearing again.

Steve finished his drink and felt a need to do something with his hands now that he no longer had a cup to carry. It wasn’t the kind of scene where he could just hold Eddie’s hand or anything, but Steve was all about physical touch. He refrained, just because he didn’t know how to navigate this space. It was all kind of foreign to him.

The band was good. The crowd loved them. Eddie loved them. Hell, Steve even loved them. They put on a decent show with a nice mix of covers and originals. Some of the covers were even songs that Steve knew well.

“Hey, I’ll be right back,” Eddie said, ducking away from Steve and disappearing into the bar. Robin swooped in almost immediately.

“Where’s he going?” Robin asked.

“I dunno, maybe he has a dog too,” Steve teased. “You don’t have to keep making up reasons to leave us alone, you know.”

“Yeah, but it’s fun,” Robin replied, as if it were obvious. “And considering this show is my actual hell, I’ll take fun where I can get it.” Steve chuckled.

“If you wanna head out, that’s okay. I think I can take it from here,” he permitted.

“Steve,” Robin replied, acting like she was on the verge of tears. “If you weren’t on a date right now I’d propose.”

“I already proposed to you last month, remember?”

Robin had come home with a surprise pizza after Steve had a particularly hard day. He nearly cried with happiness.

“Oh, right. Shit, does Eddie know?” Robin joked. The two of them laughed, and then they were interrupted by the band.

“Alright, you guys,” the lead singer said. “Thank you for being such a great crowd, and for giving us a few minutes to set up here. We have a special treat for you tonight.”

“Imagine they just start playing Barbie Girl or something,” Steve said.

“God, I wish,” Robin replied with a smirk. The lead singer continued.

“Back when the band first started, we had a different guitarist,” he announced. “And tonight, the original legend himself is here, so we thought we’d save him some spotlight. Everyone, give it up for Eddie Munson!”

“Um, okay,” Robin said. “Never mind. I’m not going anywhere.”

Steve was so shocked, there was a moment where his brain convinced him that the guitarist in question just so happened to have the same name as his date. But then Eddie walked out on stage, grinning from ear to ear, and taking the place of the guy who’d been playing guitar up to that point. Eddie slung it over his shoulder, looking completely comfortable and at home, and then waved to the audience.

After a minute of adjustment, they started playing Master of Puppets.

Steve’s eyes bugged out of his head. He’d never been more attracted to anyone in his life.

When Gareth offered to have Eddie join the stage for a song, there was no way he could pass it up. Not only was he excited to play with his friends again, but he never felt more confident than he did when he was performing. It was a rush he’d come to miss these last few years.

Back then, they usually just played for a couple of drunks in dive bars. This time, the bar was packed. It still wasn’t the Garden or anything, but it felt just as good.

Master of Puppets was a song he’d learned in high school, and they used to close every show with it. Eddie didn’t play guitar as often anymore, but muscle memory is a crazy thing. He also tattooed people for a living, so he was generally pretty precise with his hands.

He’d ran through it a few times before the show, and was surprised at how quickly it came back to him. He didn’t miss a note.

After his song, the band took a little break. Eddie still felt high as he stepped off the stage and made his way back to where Steve and Robin had been standing. Gareth trailed behind him, desperate to meet the man who had managed to soften the clenched fist with hair that was Eddie Munson.

“Dude, what the fuck?” Steve said as they approached him. The blush on his face combined with the playful tone of his voice let Eddie know he’d done what he’d set out to do.

“What?” Eddie replied, smirking.

“That was -” Steve stuttered. “- I mean - and you - and you didn’t -”

“Hi, I’m Gareth!” Eddie’s friend extended a hand out to shake with both Robin and Steve. “Eddie and I are old friends, and I had the amazing idea to bring him on stage tonight so that I could be the world’s best wingman. It’s nice to meet you!”

“Come on, dude,” Eddie said to Gareth. “Let me look cool for at least ten seconds before you give me away.”

“That’s okay,” Robin said, glancing at Steve beside her. “I think his brain short-circuited.”

“Eddie, can we -?” Steve asked. “Uh, go somewhere private?”

Eddie wasn’t sure whether or not that was a good thing. He hoped it was a good thing, obviously, but Steve’s face was completely blank. Maybe Steve hated metal music. He hadn’t asked or prepared the guy when they planned this whole thing.

“Yeah, sure,” Eddie said, pretending he wasn’t thinking a million things at once. He led Steve back through the crowd and to a backstage area, where he’d been with Gareth and the rest of the band earlier in the night. Once they were alone, the silence around them felt suffocating. “Uh, is everything o-”

And then Steve was kissing him. Eddie was stunned, but only for a brief moment. Steve pulled away.

“This is okay, right?” he asked.

“Yeahyeahyeah,” Eddie responded, pulling him right back in.

Dating might not have been Eddie’s specialty, but making out sure was. Of course, Steve seemed to be excellent at both.

“Damn,” Steve muttered, his lips brushing Eddie’s. “Felt like if I didn’t do that I’d explode or something.”

Steve was hot, sensitive, funny, and a great kisser.

Eddie was in deep shit. Welcome back, Heart-Eyes Munson.

“So,” Gareth said, now that he was alone with Robin. “What was that about?”

“Well,” Robin responded. “I know Steve pretty well, and it’s very likely they’re sucking face back there.”

“You think?” Gareth asked, amused. “Wow. Look at our boys go.”

“Took them long enough,” Robin said.

“Did you enjoy the show?” Gareth asked. Robin froze, unsure how to respond. “I’m kidding. I can tell you hated it, and that’s okay.”

“I didn’t hate it,” Robin clarified. “Like, if it was this or the one-woman show, I’d choose this.”

“One-woman show?” Gareth asked.

“Oh, right. You don’t know me. Ha,” Robin replied. Talking to new people made her kind of nervous. That’s why she loved being around Steve, because he always just kinda knew what she was thinking and had all the context of her madness. “It’s a - Steve and I were talking about it earlier.”

“Okay, well we’ve still got time before I go back on.” Gareth said, urging Robin to continue.

“Uh, okay,” she began. “So, you’re not from here, right?” Gareth shook his head. “Okay, so basically all over town there’s this flier advertising this mysterious one-woman show. It says nothing about the show or the woman performing it, just that it’s ‘a solid 6 out of 10 experience,’ said by some random reviewer, and apparently the show is called Pot of Gold.”

“Damn,” Gareth replied. “And you’d rather be here than go to that?” Robin chuckled.

“Yeah, because I don’t trust it. Like, what if it’s secretly a multi-level marketing thing or I get kidnapped or it’s really just a prank show and then my dumb ass is on camera? What if I hate it but I’m too awkward to leave, so then I just have to sit there while a single person talks at me? Oh God, what if I’m the only one in the audience?”

“You have thought about this a lot,” Gareth teased. Robin shrugged. “I get it, but honestly it sounds kinda fun. I’m here for a couple days. I’d go with you, if you want. It would get rid of the possibility of you being alone at least!”

“Oh,” Robin said, blushing. She hated doing this next part. “That’s really nice of you, but uh - I mean, I’m gay.” Gareth laughed, completely unfazed.

“Yeah, Eddie already briefed me,” he joked. “I’m not hitting on you, I swear. I’m just mad curious now, and I live for the chaos.”

“I see why you and Eddie are friends,” Robin said. “Yeah, maybe. I’ve been dying to know what it’s about, honestly.”

“Yeah, I bet,” Gareth agreed. “I could probably get the other guys to join if that helps. Eddie and Steve too, unless they’re gonna be gross.” Robin laughed.

“Okay,” she said. “Then, I mean - if you want to? It could be fun as a group.”

“And if it’s not, we can make fun of it afterwards over some beers or something.”

Robin realized at that moment that it had been a while since she had made new friends. The band wouldn’t be in town for very long, but the idea of hanging out with them did actually seem fun.

“Deal,” she confirmed.

The two certified idiots Eddie and Steve came bumbling back moments later, showing all telltale signs that Robin had been correct - flushed faces, mussed hair, and a far more relaxed dynamic between the two of them.

“Hey guys,” Eddie greeted them casually. “Sorry, Steve just had to kiss me real quick.” Steve somehow became even redder than he had just been. He laughed nervously and ran his fingers through his hair.

“You’re really not discreet, are you?” Steve asked. Eddie leaned over and spoke low enough that only Steve could hear.

“No, but now you know a good way to get me to shut up.”

Steve’s heart stopped. Lord almighty. Eddie stood straight again, acting as if he hadn’t just said what he’d said. Apparently, he could be discreet when he wanted to be. Eddie nonchalantly reached over and interlocked his fingers with Steve’s, giving his hand a quick squeeze.

“Well, I guess I better get back up there,” Gareth said, excusing himself.

“And it looks like my work here is done, too,” Robin said, curtsying before exiting as well.

Steve felt much better now that they’d crossed that physical barrier. He kept himself attached to Eddie the rest of the night, enjoying the music while barely registering it, feeling like he was on cloud 9.

“So,” Eddie said once the show was over. “How’d I do?”

They were walking hand in hand down the street, swinging their arms between them like they were silly teenagers.

“I’d say you crushed it,” Steve replied. “You know what this means, right?”

“What?” Eddie wondered.

“Well, you planned this one,” Steve pointed out. “So, I get the next one.”

“Sounds reasonable to me.”

They made it to Steve’s apartment. Eddie walked him to the door like a gentleman.

“Just you wait,” Steve teased. “Now that I know we’re pulling all the stops, get ready to have the best date of your life.”

Eddie gave Steve a quick peck on the lips and smiled.

“I don’t doubt it,” he responded.

He really didn’t.

(next part)

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@paintballkid711 @abraca-fxckyou @allbimyself26 @jellybabiesforall @allbymyselfexceptformycactus @justaloadofgarbage-blog @alliemunsonsstuff @undreamingnscatworld @hobbitnarwhal @calivanus @wreckmyplans-thatsmyman @antheia @goodolefashionedloverboi @lillemilly @missmagillicuddy @steviesbicrisis @gamerdano @menamesniall @eyeslikewildflowers111 @callmesirkay @stringischeese @eds-trashmouth @mnl-enuh @redfreckledwolf @itsanarrum @soulsofstarsliveinyourveins @stevesbipanic @momotonescreaming @aryakanojiaa @wrenisflying @comicmadlover @lilacrobin @itch-my-b0nez @anonymousbandgirl @disastardly @dangdirtydemons @daisyellsong @val-from-lawrence @starryeyedpoet17 @taikawaiteatea @clumsiluni @hollysimone @swimmingbirdrunningrock @witchofhawkins @steddiegarbage @suddenlyinlove @ricekristytreaty @eddielives1986 @bunnyweasley23 @thefailcollection @ppunkpuppyy @bestwifehaver @httpsphynx

#flowers and ink #steddie #steddie fic #st fanfic #writing #steve and eddie #steve harrington #eddie munson #eddie munson x steve harrington #stranger things fanfiction #platonic stobin #gareth

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sorrelpaws · 7 months

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Sorrel imma listen to each song and the playlist and give my take! I wanna see how close or off or just any feedback tbh! For funzies! LMAO The first song is JUST THE VIIIBE FOR THE SHOW OVERALL <33

YOU ACTUALLY WENT THROUGH EVERYTHING honestly im so giddy over this. I'LL PUT MORE SPECIFIC THOUGHTS under the readmore, BUT U WERE PRETTY SPOT ON DUDE!!!

arrival - totally for the vibe. Just sounds like them to me daydream in blue - originally this was more so about rick/diane and how rick (badly)copes with her loss. BUT HONESTLY your interpretations centering morty's disillusionment ARE ALSO REALLY NEAT and i cant believe i didnt think of that sooner hehe i think it might be hell - YUP!!! mostly rick song but also has some lines that work for morty them changes - ALSO WORKS FOR BOTH OF THEM!! but personally i think of it more as a rick song snake eyes - I'LL ADMIT THAT THIS is half here for the vibe, BUT ALSO yeah definitely morty at a breaking point toy plane - YESSS EXACTLY!!!! i've been plugging this as a morty song basically since i found it. Very much about the dynamic between him and rick. TO BE HONEST i've never even thought about the "though this house is unchanged" LINES BUT YOU'RE SO RIGHT. RICK POTION #9. found god in a tomato - YUPPP very much their vibe. also makes me think very much about rick and just The way he is. his whole "i'm better than everyone" shtick just - YESSS EXACTLY THIS IS LITERALLY JUST rick being an asshole 180db_[130] - YUP just here for the vibe B) everything hurts - YEAH YEAH YEAH just completely rick's angsty sad miserable life no need for a leader - actually this for me is very much an evil morty song. specifically s3e7's whole plot starstruck - YUP MORTY SONG!!! for all his hurt feelings and protests, morty still obviously looks up to rick A Lot, so while he may be mad about something, he'll still go along with whatever rick wants fifteen minutes - THEM BOTH YEAH. here for the vibe cadence - this one is just kind of Rick and Morty to me. i dont even know how to explain it, just has their vibe. BUT I LIKE your interpretation a lot!! about how morty is aware of rick's self loathing and trying to kind of help him in his own way i'm your dog - YEAH. this is the most morty song ever to me. he really wants to act like he doesnt need rick, but he's also disgustingly codependent so the moment rick needs him, he comes running back. in the yard - YES!!! huge morty song. kind of has rick potion #9 vibes again, BUT I REALLY like the idea that there's some pressure to never mess up around rick, and feeling like his family prefers each other over him who is she ? - YEAH kind of here for the vibes, but also a bit for rick and diane! i don't know, i just feel like after searching for her killer for a couple of decades she might morph into less of a person and more of just an idea running on a treadmill - HEHE YESSSS morty doing everything for ricks approval to the point he sacrifices his own comfrot barbarism begins at home - YES about rick and morty's weird abusive relationship. morty not being "good enough", rick being a terrible role model/adult presence and not knowing how to be Nice call this # now - JUST FOR THE VIBES!!!! money - THIS ONE to me is about rick wanting to be better for morty, but having a really hard time stepping out of his nihilistic-asshole comfort zone. he knows he sucks, he acknowledges it, and he really wants to be better kiss me, son of god - very much a rick song hehe. specifically im imagining him in the era where he's contributing to the citadel's creation, but there's a line here that also make me think a bit about his relationship with prime (i destroyed the bond of friendship and respect between the only people left who'd even look me in the eye) birdhouse in your soul - just Rick and Morty and their relationship dungen - another Just for The Vibe song, BUT YEAH works well as a "throwback to the "good" ol' days" interpretation too drunk to come - YEPPPP RICK SONG ALL THE WAY BABY nugget killer - i'll be honest i also have no idea what this song says or means But it just Feels like rick and morty to me. i can feel it in my bones glue - YUHHHH MORTY ABOUT RICK YEOP YEP YEP YEOP oulala - YEP rick and his whole attachment and substance abuse issues two weeks - YEAH. their whole relationship

#asks #rick and morty

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evilwickedme · 1 year

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👀 I would love to hear more about aroace Jason

so there's actually a nice amount of canon evidence for this, most of which was not intended to be canon evidence for this. I saw many of these panels on tiktok originally and unfortunately many of them have been deleted, but at least one that I have bookmarked is still up by user goodusername28 so you can go check that out.

anyway, to sum up, robin!jason is a precious baby who was written to be simply too innocent to understand why people want romantic relationships, but also he was fourteen/fifteen at the time which when many people (including myself!) get in their first relationships and even fall in love for the first time, and him expressing disgust at Bruce being in a romantic relationship can also easily be read as him not being able to understand or relate to wanting to have a relationship at all.

when it comes to adult!jason, honestly he hasn't really had the time to date that much, but the few relationships that they do try to give him all seem to crash and burn really quickly and he never seems to me to be that invested, or the relationships even happen entirely off screen (apparently after they've hooked him up with rose wilson in a couple of elseworlds stories {there's one where they're married I think??}, they decided to mention that he and rose "used to date" in canon. when tho. literally when. he don't got the time!). in n52 rhato he simply does not catch onto the fact that a stereotypically hot flight attendant is hitting on him and once they do go on a date seems honestly surprised that she'd want to kiss him. canonically they do fuck, but a. acearo people still have sex b. scott lobdell can't write, so I take what I want from his shitty writing and leave the best behind. they also repeat the whole jason being weird about consenting adults being in relationships around him sometimes as an adult, which is just hilarious cause they also insist on writing him as someone who fucks. pick a struggle, dude.

canonically the first time jason has sex is with talia shortly before he returns to gotham, and when you read the issue it's just. honestly, he doesn't express any attraction to her and I don't understand why he slept with her and it makes their already weird relationship basically incoherent, which is why so many fics ignore it happening altogether. but when it comes to my headcanon, if I choose to acknowledge that was a thing that went to print? it was about comfort. like, she is the only thing that's really familiar and safe for him right that moment, and if she comes onto him and you choose not to interpret that as an assault, it's gotta be that he accepts for that reason. and that's not desire.

there is more evidence, some specific panel stuff, but like obviously this is an interpretation that dances around canon. dc comics does not want us to think that jason is aroace. jason is a hot anti-hero, obviously he fucks. except like. he really doesn't. he's so fucking bad at relationships. he does not have any steady romantic interests. except for damian, who's still a literal child (and even then still has had a romantic interest in teen titans apparently), he's simply had the least romantic plotlines of all the robins (tim and steph count for each other, for one, plus after this week's issue of batgirls you can basically count stephcass as canon, dick has had numerous love interests with the most notable ones being babs and kory, obviously, and tim is the actual slut of the family, like dude really gets around).

and honestly I just like it? like I think it vibes with his character very well. if I'm writing him, I'm probably either writing him as demi or as aroace, depends on the story I'm telling. I have yet to come across a bad a-spec!jason fic (I've already rec'd all the ones I have tho, so go ahead and make new ones I'd fucking love that). it's just a solid headcanon.

to go into more detail about my specific headcanon, in my mind jason really hasn't had the chance to figure out that he is ace. I don't think he's even had the chance to figure out he has "equal attraction" to both genders. like my guy's been through a lot. he was a teenager and then he exploded and then he came back to life and was cutting heads off people and then he was a villain for a bit and then his dad died and then his dad wasn't dead and then reality got rewritten and he was a part of this team and then he was part of batman incorporated and then another team and also his brother died but it turned out his brother wasn't really dead and then his other brother died and this brother really was dead but he was brought to life by his dad and then his dad had amnesia and there was -

okay so basically what I'm saying is I don't know how anybody in the batfam has time for a romantic life, but certainly jason has not had the time or emotional space to figure out he does not want one. I don't think he looks at other people and wonders why he's not in a relationship, he's too busy being a crime lord and/or having daddy issues. like if he's going to be looking at strangers and longing for what they have it's like, a superficially happy and loving father/son relationship. he wants very much to belong and to be loved. but both canonically and in my own headcanon, he's not particularly motivated by romantic love.

anyway so yeah acearo jason fucks. or wait, no, that's -

#gklraenglanlkalknh #I just really loved this headcanon #acearo jason todd #a spec jason todd #demi jason todd #jason todd #batfam #rhato #dc #gail speaks #ask #anonymous #oh my god I just found out I can edit tags on desktop I didn't know they'd rolled that out already #'to sum up' who was I kidding #aroace jason todd #jason todd my beloved #jt

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luminnara · 2 years

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Just went through the Lost boys x stranger things tag and I'm IN LOOOOVEEEE!!! I LOVE IT SO FREAKING MUCH!!! THE AMOUNT OF POSSIBILITIES OMG. My mind is reeling with the boys thoughts on the party back in Hawkins. Who would is their favorite kid? Who talks to Will about his (cough gay thoughts cough)? Who would have a sass battle and nice comebacks with Max? Who spoils Dustin rotten or becomes a bad influence? Who is trying to not wrangle Mike? WHO TALKS AND GIVE SPORT ADVICE TO MY LUCAS??? WHO IS ABSOLUTELY OVER THE MOON OR FREAKED OUT ABOUT JANE/011'S POWERS??? *I need answers*

This crossover is literally THE perfect thing to me right now so I’m very glad other people like it so I don’t have to shut up about it 😂

Dwayne chills and listens to Will talk, but David is the one who’s actually helpful. He’s good at tough love because he’s an asshole, so it’s what he does for ALL of them. Like, it isn’t necessarily the best approach, but he’d sit there, take a drag, and go “so next time Mike wheeler is ignoring you, you hafta just threaten his life. It’s the only way you’ll get his attention. It’s 1986 who gives a shit anyways”

Dustin and Paul hang out. Dustin hates it at first because he’s like “this guy is a fucking idiot” but Paul has saved Dustin’s ass from surf Nazis like three times now and keeps following him around asking science questions. If the kids didn’t already know that the boys were vampires before, they’re gonna suspect that something weird is going on, because Dustin will be talking about radios or something and Paul will just go “oh lmao back in my day the gramophone was the big new thing. Progress sure is wild huh” and walk away

Of course, this also means that Paul is a terrible influence on Dustin, and when Steve rolls into town he’s SO mad about it lol

Marko and Max. Absolute pals. At first they can’t STAND each other, but after fifteen minutes of slinging insults back and forth, they realize that they’re totally on the same wavelength. Marko is like the fun older brother that Billy can’t bring himself to be, and they hang out and skate around the boardwalk and run from the cops every night.

Dwayne gives Lucas sports (and girl) advice. They play football on the beach at night and he uses the carnival games on the boardwalk as basketball practice. Even though Dwayne isn’t particularly good at either sport, he’s still a vampire, so he does pretty well lol

They are ALL trying not to throttle Mike like it’s an episode of the simpsons. They’re a group of dudes who are all sort of dating each other and don’t let anybody get in the way of that, so it’s like a very gay bros before hoes thing, except they’re both the bros AND the hoes in their situation. The point is, they would see how Mike’s relationship with El has been shoving his friendships to the side, and they wouldn’t like that. I also don’t really think they would get along with him at first, because he would make some comments that they absolutely HATE and all be asking Steve if he REALLY needs all of these kids or if he would be okay with them chomping on one

David would think el’s powers are neat. They wouldn’t freak the vampires out too much, since they can play mind tricks on humans already, and they would want to test things out and see if they can pull their usual pranks on her or not.

The frog brothers are spying the entire time and they’re SO freaked out about El. They’re calling Sam up to tell him that the government has come to Santa Carla and it’s only a matter of days before they’re all turned into lizard people

#stranger things x lost boys #stranger things #lost boys

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singofsolace · 11 months

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Ted Lasso Season (Series?) Finale Thoughts

So, firstly, Apple wasn't off to a good start by announcing the day-of that the season finale was going to air three hours later than the rest of the episodes. I had to weigh whether I wanted to be tired and grouchy watching it from midnight to 1:15am, or if I wanted to wait six hours and watch it before I went to work....

Well, I watched it this morning, and I'm glad I did, because I don't think I would've been able to handle the emotional upheaval and lack of payoff at 1:15 in the morning.

I just don't understand. Like, genuinely. Ending with Rebecca crying and essentially begging Ted to stay, only for that not to happen? And then we see a Beard/Jane wedding, of all things, when within the show it has been acknowledged that that relationship is at the best toxic, and at its worst, downright abusive...??? And then for Rebecca to become a mother via the Dutch Boat Guy whose name we still don't know...? What the actual fuck??? And when did the promised "lightning" and other signs happen with the Dutch guy? When Rebecca was drunk on a boat with a stranger and passed out on his couch?

I'm honestly incredibly unsatisfied with every single character's ending, which hasn't been an experience of mine since the Chilling Adventures of Sabrina ended. What is it with writers and not knowing how to not royally piss off their fans, or even just meet audience expectations...?!?

Literally, I did not need Tedbecca to happen, I just needed Ted/Jason Sudeikis to acknowledge that Rebecca/Hannah was crying for him to stay? Like this poor woman is falling apart in an airport, and in response, he just...shows no emotion?!?! Dude, what the fuck? The hug might've mirrored the one in "For the Children," but the difference was that Jason/Ted was actually showing emotion during that scene, and, in contrast, showed absolutely none during the airport scene?!? What?!?!

Literally, the only character arcs that ended on a satisfying note were Keeley's and Colin's, and even then, there's stuff I would've changed about how those stories were handled.

Ted went home to Kansas, despite Rebecca begging him to stay. The implication being that he either got back with Michelle despite that relationship being doomed, or he's accepted a life of pining for her while he coaches little league soccer...?

Beard married a woman who has been abusing him since season 1, and Ted wasn't even at their wedding!

Nate was welcomed back by the team, when prior to the last two episodes, the team got violent on the pitch after seeing a video of him tearing up the Believe sign, and there was literally no explanation for why the team suddenly welcomed him back...? (and Ted's immediate forgiveness is par for the course, I guess, so while I would've liked to see something different, I'm not mad about that, just frustrated, because it doesn't feel earned, but then again, Ted is just "that kind of guy," so whatever I guess)

Rebecca's storyline ends with a relationship with a literal stranger, and as a mother to a girl who was introduced on screen in the last fifteen minutes... and the fact that Rebecca doesn't really want to keep the club, but then appears to want to possibly start a women's team...that's... nice, I guess, but it just...doesn't make sense to me that she'd go from wanting to sell the team completely if Ted leaves, to wanting to start a Women's team in the same episode?? (that felt like a bit of pandering, I'm not gonna lie, but also it's in-character for Keeley to suggest it...so I guess I'm not gonna get too bent out of shape about it)

Keeley is back where she started at the beginning of the season, except this time she's grown a bit, so I guess...good for her?

Jamie forgives his father for a lifetime of abuse just because he's in rehab? like, I'm sorry, but I have an alcoholic father myself, and even if he gave up alcohol tomorrow (which he has attempted in the past, and failed, because alcoholism is a disease etc etc) I would not trust the fact that he's in rehab to actually make a fucking difference! He's an abuser, plain and simple. The alcohol didn't make him abuse his son?! Alcohol didn't make him organize the r*pe of his child in Amsterdam...? I've known plenty of alcoholics who hurt themselves rather than others. it's not the alcohol. it's him.

Roy takes over as manager, but honestly? he better be working pretty hard in therapy, because he spent the whole third season being a pretty shitty "coach" to Jamie??? like he admits that he was taking his anger out through coaching on Jamie...?; And don't even get me fucking started on Jamie and Roy fighting over Keeley in the final episode!! While she had the right response--to slam the door in their fucking faces--I thought we were so far past the point of them fighting over her in such a juvenile way, so it pissed me off that the finale had them regress to cavemen...

...ugh. I'm so upset. fuck.

I'm sure I'll have more thoughts later, but right now, all I feel is confusion and disappointment.

#ted lasso spoilers #rebecca welton #ted lasso #roy kent #Kelley jones #jamie tartt

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mari-lair · 2 years

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i love the art where they are both murderers, do you have any ideas for that au?

(the murderer art: Here)

I do! I don’t have a plot but I have a few ideas about them. Heads up for violence and major OOC behavior! A lot had to be changed to make them murderers.

Akane (Body Count 3)

Akane is usually a very apathetic and independent person, but he is able to form relationships and occasionally cares about others. When he does get attached to something he will not leave it alone, confused but also intrigued by his own emotions. He feels more positive emotions than negative ones when he finds himself caring about someone, so he is open to meeting new people, hoping even when most of the time he is unable to form even the most basic of connection with classmates or childhood playmates.

He help others sometimes, but his only friend is Aoi-chan, who is very smart and very pretty, he likes making her happy cause her giggle is one of the few things he got attached to.

He accidentally kills a kid that was harassing Aoi when he is ten. Akane was mildly surprised by this, but Aoi was distraught, helping him clean up the evidence and dispose of the body while crying nonstop. Akane felt nothing as he dragged a corpse, not caring that he had become a criminal, but he felt weird in a way he didn’t like when Aoi got sad, so he told himself to not kill people.

Akane is good at understanding other people but since he isn’t very attached to himself, he doesn’t pay attention to his own needs or feelings.

Aoi is murdered a year later, and her blood is beautiful, Akane can only think “...I wish I was the one that killed her.” at first, unable to process her death.

He misses Aoi but doesn’t understand that he’s grieving, so he tries to fix the “bad emotion” by taking her out of her resting place after the funeral and putting her in his freezer, making sure there was no evidence of his grave robbery.

He dresses her up in her favorite frilly dresses, clean her, and teaches himself to be a master at makeup so he can make her look less decomposed, but it doesn’t ‘fix’ his grief. He holds her frozen hand sometimes but it also doesn’t bring back the nice emotions he used to have when they played together. One day he snaps and completely shatters her frozen body, deciding that if she is truly gone, he should have been the one responsible for it, as her best friend.

He buries the remains in her grave again, visiting her to leave flowers sometimes.

He mostly lives alone, his parents work overseas. He’s used to be alone but not used to feel lonely.

He is oddly honest with most things. Doesn’t really do manipulation, he has a bluntness and a dark sense of humor Lemon finds funny and a ‘bizarre’ way of acting that is kind of charming. They become somewhat friends, though Akane is only slightly attached to him, he is very protective after Aoi's death, always saying a serious “Don’t die” when Lemon makes jokes about dumb internet challenges, like eating tide pods. He is genuinely scared of feeling grief again.

He kills anyone, person or animal, that manages to genuinely bother his friend, but he doesn’t tell anyone, learning from Aoi that it makes people ‘sad’ and ‘scared’. Thankfully Lemon is very chill, is practically impossible to truly bother him.

Akane heard a lot about ‘heart skipping a beat’ when you’re in love and thought he was in love with Lemon, who is one of the few people that make him feel things. They dated for four days, kind of, it didn’t feel like dating, Yamabuki was the one that ‘broke up’, sitting him down and going “Dude, not to sound condescending but I really think you just got confused”. They are still friends.

Akane gets a genuine crush on a very beautiful and charismatic girl at fifteen, it reminds him of what he felt with Aoi and it brings him memories he would rather not deal with, so he kills the girl. He is too reactive and his targets are usually not planned, but he is very good at making things look like an accident or completely disposing of evidence. So he isn’t caught.

Kill fast. Does not feel anything at the killing itself, but if it’s a murder that was hard to plan and execute, he will feel satisfaction from a well-done task.

He is still a workaholic since short burst of satisfaction is one of the easiest emotions for him to feel and understand. People never give him any crazy requests, but if he was asked to poison someone and given a good explanation, he would.

Dislikes murderers. The idea someone could just take away what he cares about again is bad.

Hates himself and isn’t aware of it.

Teru (Body Count 9)

Teru can’t quite distinguish living from dead, both bleed, both scream and beg, but he still knows supernaturals are trash compared to people: No one cares if he exorcises 100 supernaturals but a single human death will leave the town in fear. He knows on a basic level that he shouldn’t kill people, but he likes killing more than exorcising supernaturals, not only because their death feels more impactful, but also cause a supernatural dissipates in the air after they die, while a dead human keep bleeding, their body remains in the near shore.

He only murders people when his stress is at an all-time high, every murder of his is very calculated. He is a sadist, so he likes prolonging his murders. He is still cautions though, always destroying the vocal cords first so his victims can’t scream and reveal their location and not inflicting messy attacks. If he feels like he can’t afford to give someone a slow death without being caught, he will end it quickly, his self restrain really good.

Murderers are not that uncommon in the Minamoto clan, and Teru is a very good exorcist that isn't addicted to killing, so other exorcists cover up for him if needed. Occasionally, his family moves cities.

A phenomenal liar, knows exactly what people want after a brief talk with them.

Usually he is either stressed or plain bored, so anything entertaining gets his attention.

He ocasionally have difficulty connecting with Kou and Tiara, needing to study their behavior to give them a big brother they’ll like. He does care about them, and is very protective, but he isn’t capable of getting super emotionally attached. His emotions are a bit… muted for lack of a better word, no matter what, logic will always be what moves him.

Does not share their bloody family history with his siblings. He is amused to be seen as a hero, to the point he comes up with a game, challenging himself to keep them in the dark for as long as possible.

He can’t cook for shit, but his ‘hobby’ made him very good at cleaning, sometimes he helps Kou clean the house.

Puts murderers on the same level as supernaturals: Someone with no empathy that can hurt his family. He’s well aware he can hurt his own family, had done it on accident a few times, but he doesn’t care about the hypocrisy of it, making an effort to correct his behavior with them.

When he meets Akane they both get a sense the other killed a person before. They immediately don’t trust each other.

#toilet bound hanako kun #minamoto teru #akane aoi #aoi akane #ooc as hell #yes i am once more late to reply uyghuyguy #but i hope you enjoy anon!#murderers au #aoiaoi #terukane #or pre-terukane

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gas-stxtion · 7 months

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@rejectshumanity said: [ scared ] sender scares receiver

(non-verbal angst - open)

Typically, four in the morning at the Northcastle gas station is completely dead. Very few customers are out and about at that time, and the ones who are usually aren't feeling very talkative. Which suits Jack just fine, really--it's a nice time for him to get some peace and quiet, away from the nonsense and insanity daylight brings.

That's not to say, of course, that he lets his guard down. You can only be kidnapped so many times before you stop being surprised by it, after all. So, while the night shift is often relaxing for Jack, he also spends it looking over his shoulder, shoulders hunched and tense as he tries to ensure nothing awaits him in the shadows.

Sometimes, though, he still lets his guard down without meaning to.

He's restocking the display of canned peanuts, humming to himself as he makes sure each can is in its perfect place. This kind of mindless, repetitive work is exactly his kind of thing, and it helps him relax like little else does. So, as he works, he has a small, content smile on his face.

Unfortunately, the universe does so love throwing curveballs his way to keep him on his toes.

After about fifteen minutes of restocking the display, Jack notices a flash of light hair out of the corner of his eye. Immediately, he freezes, his heart leaping into his throat as he turns his head to see-

-no one there.

Jack stares at the corner of the empty store for several long seconds. His hands start shaking as he reaches into his pocket, wrapping his long, bony fingers around the boxcutter he keeps there. The weight of the blade is comforting--at least if Spencer grabs him, he can fight back, even if the idea of that kind of violence often turns his stomach.

Keeping his hand on the box cutter, Jack turns back to the display, only to see a shadow looming over him. He startles, reflexively whipping out the box cutter to point it at the person standing in front of him.

It's not Spencer. Somehow, it's worse.

Jack curses loudly when he registers Dio standing in front of him. "Jesus, dude!" he says. "What the fuck is your problem?" With his hands still shaking, he puts the boxcutter away. "Actually, don't answer that. Fuck, you scared the shit out of me." He chooses not to question why Dio is here at this hour, nor how the vampire got in without him noticing.

After Jack has a moment to catch his breath, he says to Dio, "Sorry for pointing a box cutter at you, man." Though he's sure a box cutter wouldn't do much to defend him in this instance, he feels like apologizing is the nice thing to do here. Not that Dio would ever return the favor.

#closer to canon verse: sharp left turn #you and your friends here are all kinds of messed up {in character}#rejectshumanity #//this did not turn out as angsty as i planned lol #//but ykw it's fine FJSJRHEH #//if you want me to fix or change anything lmk!!!

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apocalypticavolition · 1 year

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Let's (re)Read the Hobbit! Chapters 3 & 4

Welcome back to my reread. When we last left Bilbo, Gandalf, and the dwarves, they’d nearly all gotten themselves killed by mindlessly walking one-by-one into an ambush. As this time we’ll be covering two chapters (#3, “A Short Rest”, being rather short), we’ll be taking a good look at how they perform under wildly different circumstances: being ambushed in a slightly more forgivable way! But first, Elrond! As always, expect casual spoilers.

They camped under the stars, and their horses had more to eat than they had; for there was plenty of grass, but there was not much in their bags, even with what they had got from the trolls.

Again, I really want to point out how nice it is that concerns about food are a significant matter throughout the journey instead of them just running out whenever it’s convenient. It’s a good detail and there’s several major journeys I can think of in other major fantasy stories where I do wonder why they never seem to worry about rations or water.

“That is only the beginning of the Misty Mountains, and we have got to get through, or over, or under those somehow, before we can come into Wilderland beyond.”

Don’t try Caradhras though – he’s a very grumpy mountain.

“We must not miss the road, or we shall be done for,” [Gandalf] said.

Again, by all rights this should not be difficult. The Great East Road is seldom used at this point but it’s survived for thousands of years and you should be on it! That said, the descriptions of the terrain as they approach the mountains are quite lovely and remind me a good deal of home. Tolkien had a great way of describing wilderness.

Altogether it was a very slow business following the track, even guided by Gandalf, who seemed to know his way about pretty well.

As always, the mistake is assuming that Gandalf is actually trying to be helpful or that he knows what he’s doing. Dude probably has to retrace his exact steps from the very first time he went to Rivendell, which involved sixteen false starts.

(More charitably, it’s probably a favor to Elrond to keep visitors too confused to know how to find Rivendell again on their own.)

The faggots are reeking, / …

Wow Tolkien that’s very rude. Even without this line though, I think this song is probably my least favorite of the ones in this book? We’ll see depending on what else is there. (Also spoiler alert my favorite is “Fifteen birds in five fir-trees” and you owe it to yourself to listen to the Rankin/Bass cartoon’s version every day.)

He loved elves, though he seldom met them; but he was a little frightened of them too.

I suppose the elves sometimes still follow the Great East Road, which definitely exists despite Thorin and Gandalf’s difficulty in finding it, from the Grey Havens to Rivendell’s vicinity and back? This is too early for them to be sailing off I’d think. Then again, it’s only about sixty years until the exodus really takes off so maybe they already are? When did they start anyway? Has it been going on the whole time since the end of the second age?

Also [Bilbo] would have liked to have a few private words with these people that seemed to know his names and all about him, although he had never seen them before.

Gandalf spent half the time meeting with the Rivendell crew last chapter telling them all sorts of exciting hobbit facts. Unlike the dwarf version, all of them were true. They were also horribly invasive to Bilbo’s privacy.

“Don’t dip your beard in the foam, father!” they cried to Thorin, who was bent almost on to his hands and knees.

Is that just to guide the pony? Doesn’t seem like the pose you’d take but what do I know? It’s certainly not like there’s any vertical obstruction over the river or the ponies couldn’t cross at all.

“Hush, hush! Good People! and good night!” said Gandalf, who came last.

“Sing any songs about me and I’ll turn you all into toads!”

The master of the house was an elf-friend—one of those people whose fathers came into the strange stories before the beginning of History, the wars of the evil goblins and the elves and the first men in the North.

Not quite before the beginning of History in Elrond’s dad’s case – Eärendil was born 503 years into History proper, assuming it starts at the dawn of the First Age. Dude was something of a badass too, and apparently the first character Tolkien came up with for the Legendarium, which explains why Bilbo will later write a song about him. But that’s not until the sequel!

They were made in Gondolin for the Goblin-wars. They must have come from a dragon’s hoard or goblin plunder, for dragons and goblins destroyed that city many ages ago.

Here is stuff that just outright ties into the Legendarium perfectly. Fun fact for those unaware: these swords are older than Elrond and older than his dad too, since Gondolin fell when he was seven. And yet despite being multiple thousands of years old, they still work perfectly (it probably helps that they were probably held by the dwarves for awhile according to Elrond’s other guesses). Elf swords are hella awesome. Troll-made swords probably work like the Giant’s Knife of Legend of Zelda and break after two swings.

...he grieved to remember the ruin of the town of Dale and its merry bells, and the burned banks of the bright River Running.

Elves really hate change, and that’s not absent in this book. Really Elrond may be one of the shared elements of The Hobbit and its sequel that fits perfectly in both.

“What do they say?” asked Gandalf and Thorin together, a bit vexed perhaps that even Elrond should have found this out first, though really there had not been a chance before, and there would not have been another until goodness knows when.

Gandalf had the map for the better part of a century and thus actually had many chances to notice the moon runes (which are another cool bit of dwarf magic that needs more love). Elrond is probably on his shit list now for showing him up, and Gandalf will be regaling him with new “Hobbit Facts” that won’t pay off until Bilbo is 111.

Also, he’s going to give Aragorn a whole stash of elf porn that belonged to his great-grandfather, and a spyglass so he can see through Arwen’s window when she’s changing.

“The first day of the dwarves’ New Year,” said Thorin, “is as all should know the first day of the last moon of Autumn on the threshold of Winter. We still call it Durin’s Day when the last moon of Autumn and the sun are in the sky together. But this will not help us much, I fear, for it passes our skill in these days to guess when such a time will come again.”

Well Thorin, I’m pretty sure you can at least guess the one day a year that a Durin’s Day might happen, so you’ve got that going for you. I also have to question why it’s beyond Elrond or Gandalf’s skill to make such a guess – they surely have the capacity and if the dwarves needed to wait five years it would be nice to let them know. But Gandalf never shares facts unless they’re to fuck with hobbits and Elrond saw him slip the Playelf to young Aragorn under the table and doesn’t want any more trouble, so the group is doomed to ignorance.

Anyway, with the knowledge of the moon runes and the way to sneak into the mountain established, it’s time for the dwarves to get back on the road and see if they can actually get there, which is how we transition into chapter four, “Over Hill and Under Hill” (but not that Underhill).

The dwarves and the hobbit, helped by the wise advice of Elrond and the knowledge and memory of Gandalf, took the right road to the right pass.

Based on the evidence thus far, we can assume it’s mostly Elrond here. Once again, the description of the mountains is lovely – one wonders if the boulders that end up nearly falling on them are the early games of the storm-giants.

They had thought of coming to the secret door in the Lonely Mountain, perhaps that very next last moon of Autumn—“and perhaps it will be Durin’s Day” they had said. Only Gandalf had shaken his head and said nothing. Dwarves had not passed that way for many years, but Gandalf had, and he knew how evil and danger had grown and thriven in the Wild, since the dragons had driven men from the lands, and the goblins had spread in secret after the battle of the Mines of Moria.

See? Gandalf literally has good reason to be concerned – and good reason to know it will be Durin’s Day – and he shares nothing with the party, because that would be helpful. .Literally everything that happens after this is his fault, and while it does technically save the world, the fate of the horses lies on him. The horses deserved better!

When he peeped out in the lightning-flashes, he saw that across the valley the stone-giants were out, and were hurling rocks at one another for a game, and catching them, and tossing them down into the darkness where they smashed among the trees far below, or splintered into little bits with a bang.

The storm-giants are another thing that actually feels more like something out of a fairy tale than part of the Legendarium – I don’t know if they really come up again anywhere else – but props to Jackson for making them feel like an organic part of the story anyway. There is very little to recommend the film trilogy but I will give credit where it’s due, which comes out to this bit, Bilbo’s casting, Thorin’s casting, and surprisingly, Bofur’s whole aesthetic. We need more dwarves in comfy hats, it’s very sexy of them.

...everybody could see that it was absolutely no use sending Bilbo)

You’d think hobbits would be good at finding subterranean shelter, all things considered. And it’s cruel to dunk on him when he’s still a top 3 member of the party whose only real competitors are Thorin (good at fights but horrible at strategy) and Gandalf (who seems to delight in the suffering of the party giving him chances to show off).

“Have you thoroughly explored it?” said the wizard, who knew that caves up in the mountains were seldom unoccupied. “Yes, yes!” [Fili and Kili] said, though everybody knew they could not have been long about it; they had come back too quick.

It’s really surprising that these two didn’t die sooner. Note again that even Bilbo can see through their crap and that Gandalf provides only the smallest crumbs of help.

But the wizard was taking no risks. He lit up his wand—as he did that day in Bilbo’s dining-room that seemed so long ago, if you remember—, and by its light they explored the cave from end to end.

“There’s clearly a secret passage here, but it’s probably nothing,” Gandalf whispered, observing that he’d technically said it aloud but in a tone too low for any of the party to actually hear.

…then they made their blankets comfortable, got out their pipes and blew smoke rings, which Gandalf turned into different colours and set dancing up by the roof to amuse them. They talked and talked, and forgot about the storm, and discussed what each would do with his share of the treasure (when they got it, which at the moment did not seem so impossible); and so they dropped off to sleep one by one. And that was the last time that they used the ponies, packages, baggages, tools and paraphernalia that they had brought with them.

It’s round two of the mini-game! Hope you’ve been practicing!

Also, it’s a great turn-around there with the impending horror of the horse’s fate completely undercutting the semi-coziness of the cave. Frankly until all this shit happened it seemed even nicer than Rivendell just because there weren’t any assholes singing mocking songs.

Then he dreamed that the floor of the cave was giving way, and he was slipping—beginning to fall down, down, goodness knows where to.

Yeah, I have dreams like this all the time when I’m falling asleep. Shit sucks even when it’s not actual monsters coming to kill you and all of your friends.

Out jumped the goblins, big goblins, great ugly-looking goblins, lots of goblins, before you could say rocks and blocks. There were six to each dwarf, at least, and two even for Bilbo; and they were all grabbed and carried through the crack, before you could say tinder and flint. But not Gandalf. Bilbo’s yell had done that much good. It had wakened him up wide in a splintered second, and when goblins came to grab him, there was a terrific flash like lightning in the cave, a smell like gunpowder, and several of them fell dead.

Wizards are OP. I can’t give the dwarves too much shit for getting captured this time because they were so badly outnumbered, but I have to point out that if they’d bothered to keep a watch at least some of this damage could have been avoided. Shame Gandalf didn’t mention that there was shit to be looking out for.

Also I’m not gonna quote the goblin song in part or in full but I will note that it’s still better than the shit the elves sang at the crew as they arrived. Fucking jerkass elves.

I am afraid that was the last they ever saw of those excellent little ponies, including a jolly sturdy little white fellow that Elrond had lent to Gandalf, since his horse was not suitable for the mountain-paths.

This is of course just another way that Gandalf was sure to punish Elrond for showing him up. RIP horses. You were much, much smarter than the guys who marched you to your deaths.

There in the shadows on a large flat stone sat a tremendous goblin with a huge head, and armed goblins were standing round him carrying the axes and the bent swords that they use.

You know how I gave Jackson credit for the stone-giants? Time to give him some shit: it was way better of Tolkien not to make the Great Goblin a weirdly diseased mutant just for extra gross factor. They’re unpleasant enough.

Sadly, the goblins are a lot less distinctly characterized than the three trolls, with the Great Goblin standing out mostly because he gets dialogue tags and all of them being unpleasant. Guess you can’t win them all.

It is not unlikely that they invented some of the machines that have since troubled the world, especially the ingenious devices for killing large numbers of people at once, for wheels and engines and explosions always delighted them, and also not working with their own hands more than they could help; but in those days and those wild parts they had not advanced (as it is called) so far.

Thus begins the theme of industry vs. pastoralism. Tolkien was quite a romantic at heart, in no small part because adopting such attitudes was one of the best ways to handle the trauma of WWI. Thus the bad guys are always associated with innovation, particularly automation and warfare.

“Up to no good, I’ll warrant! Spying on the private business of my people, I guess! Thieves, I shouldn’t be surprised to learn! Murderers and friends of Elves, not unlikely! Come! What have you got to say?”

Three out of four is pretty good, though technically they weren’t planning on burgling from him specifically.

“He is a liar, O truly tremendous one!” said one of the drivers. “Several of our people were struck by lightning in the cave, when we invited these creatures to come below; and they are as dead as stones.”

Thanks for helping, Gandalf.

Just at that moment all the lights in the cavern went out, and the great fire went off poof! into a tower of blue glowing smoke, right up to the roof, that scattered piercing white sparks all among the goblins.

Okay at least this is useful. Thanks, Gandalf! He’s even considerate enough to keep the party from being affected by this, or maybe the spell just automatically comes with friendly fire suppression. Probably the latter.

“Half a minute!” said Dori, who was at the back next to Bilbo, and a decent fellow. He made the hobbit scramble on his shoulders as best he could with his tied hands, and then off they all went at a run, with a clink-clink of chains, and many a stumble, since they had no hands to steady themselves with.

Dori for best dwarf! Sorry Balin.

This sword’s name was Glamdring the Foe-hammer, if you remember. The goblins just called it Beater, and hated it worse than Biter if possible. Orcrist, too, had been saved; for Gandalf had brought it along as well, snatching it from one of the terrified guards. Gandalf thought of most things; and though he could not do everything, he could do a great deal for friends in a tight corner.

And only when they’re in a tight corner, unfortunately.

…they took it in turn to carry him on their backs.

Ah well, Balin probably participated in this so he’s back in first. Fili and Kili are at the bottom for having so utterly fucked things up. Thorin is up there for being competent, and everyone else is an amorphous mass, just as they are in the text.

“Why, O why did I ever bring a wretched little hobbit on a treasure hunt!” said poor Bombur, who was fat, and staggered along with the sweat dripping down his nose in his heat and terror.

Poor Bombur, all that will ever be said about him in the books is how fat he is. His cartoon adaptation is a little more dignified (but dies), and the live action films make his immensity even more prominent.

Quite suddenly Dori, now at the back again carrying Bilbo, was grabbed from behind in the dark. He shouted and fell; and the hobbit rolled off his shoulders into the blackness, bumped his head on hard rock, and remembered nothing more.

Dori is now also close to the bottom, having lost Bilbo so terribly. Thus ends chapter four, with the party being split and losing someone who is currently dead weight but who is usually a lot more useful than even the narrative gives him credit for.

Next time: the chapter that was so thoroughly retconned you’d think it was a Homestuck panel!

#the hobbit #j r r tolkien #bilbo baggins #thorin oakenshield #gandalf #elrond #great goblin #let's read

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daysofourlivesrecaps · 9 months

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Wednesday, 12 July 2023

This was a pretty eventful one for a Wednesday episode! Maybe these guys have finally realized that on a streaming platform (as in life itself) time is meaningless and the labeling of individual days serves only to mark the inevitable passage of time.

Then again, they probably do know that because I think that’s exactly what this guy has been trying to tell us since 1965.

(Incidentally, they’ve shaved that intro down to a tight fifteen seconds. It would almost certainly take you longer to find and use your remote to push the ‘skip intro’ button than it would to just let it play.)

Okay, first — Wendy finally chose a guy!

If you felt jerked around by me teasing this information in yesterday’s recap, imagine how I’ve felt for the past… 8 months or so? I have a distinct memory of this being a thing around Christmas, but it’s possible it’s been going on even longer than that. And even though we knew she picked one of them at the end of yesterday’s episode, it still takes more than half of this one for them to finally tell us.

First, she asks Tripp (who lives there) to give her and Johnny some privacy.

Both guys somehow inexplicably interpret this to mean that she’s chosen Johnny, not just that she wants to have a conversation with one of them without the other one just hanging around. But of course, “misunderstandings bordering on farce” are one of this show’s favorite tricks. Certainly of late, anyway.

So Tripp goes to visit his dad, Steve. Steve continues to be an extremely good dude, and it’s easy to see how a guy like Tripp came from a dad like Steve. He tells his son that, if he cares for Wendy, he should fight for her. But not in the shitty, sexist way that guys used to do stuff like that.

Steve is doing his best to keep up with the times and gives very good advice about how to be confident and assertive without being toxic and pushy. I wish I had jokes for this, but I don’t. I’m just a real sucker for media where strong, self-assured dudes are also allowed to be compassionate and sensitive. It’s a level of nuance that actual grown-up TV shows struggle with, but this soap fucking nails it.

Back at Wendy’s place… Johnny’s being a real smug dickhole over his assumption that Wendy has chosen him.

Which is what makes it extra delightful when she says “nope, I’m actually into Tripp. Now get out of my house.” She’s more diplomatic about it than that, but after so many months of waiting for this exact thing to finally happen, my memory wants to embellish it a bit.

Also he throws a little entitled hissy fit when he gets the news. Because of course he does.

Then Tripp comes home, gets the news and everyone’s happy! Except Johnny, and nobody fucking cares about that guy!

Over at the pub, Kate and Kayla have a chat over breakfast. Mostly about how Kate really wanted Harris to kill Megan, and how disappointed she is that this didn’t end up happening. Kate gotta Kate.

Kayla commits a very mild HIPAA violation and tells Kate what’s been going on with Harris’ deprogramming.

And here he is, still at the hospital, hanging with Marlena. Who is somehow not crawling with picnic ants.

Harris believes that, what with being brainwashed to kill for Megan on two different occasions, maybe he shouldn’t just be free to go because Marlena says he’s cured now. Maybe, he suggests, I should go Offscreen Hills, the mental institution where we sent Tripp’s mom, and be under observation for awhile.

Marlena is weirdly hesitant to agree to this, but finally does.

I still want to like Harris, but a trip to Offscreen Hills usually means, as you might infer from the name, leaving the show. I mean, I’d be very happy if he met Tripp’s mom (Ava, one of my favorite characters) there and they fell in love. But that doesn’t seem terribly likely.

But before the Nice Young Men in Their Clean White Coats show up to take him away (ha ha), Kate shows up to sort-of apologize (this is Kate we’re talking about after all) for asking him to kill Megan.

Which, let’s be honest, is probably the best send-off this poor guy is likely to get.

Okay. I promised eventfulness and I definitely meant more than just “an obvious resolution to a tedious love triangle.”

Because this is the episode where we meet Clint Rawlings, formerly deputy mayor to Abe Carver and now, in light of Abe’s presumed death, acting mayor of Salem.

I was pleased to see the introduction of a new, fairly handsome character but one of my viewing companions (TLo) insisted we were meeting a new villain.

And she was proven right almost immediately. Clint really comes out swinging, laying into Chanel for daring to reopen her bakery after the Poisoned Biscuit Affair of April or So.

He proceeds to go into the elaborate web of deception and misfortune that led to Sweet Bits’ recent closure (Chanel getting involved with her college professor; the untimely demise of the professor’s wife; the subsequent cover-up of the whole affair by her mother; the arrival in Salem of two of that professor’s children, both swearing revenge) and assures her that he will not stand for any of this because his administration is going to bring law and order (now streaming on Peacock) and decency back to Salem.

If you happen to be watching the show with any racist dogs, they almost certainly started barking at the sound of that whistle.

And at the police station, Rafe actually does decide to do something about the whole “Shawn was drinking on the job” thing and prepares to suspend him. But then Shawn reveals that he knows all about Rafe’s secret affair with Jada (his subordinate and the only other named cop on the show) and effectively blackmails Rafe into not suspending him lest the affair become public knowledge.

Wow, he’s a mean drunk. Who would have expected that of Shawn Brady, the Irish cop?

Naturally someone overhears all of this. (Did I say “bordering on farce” earlier? I meant “living in a comfortable suburb of farce and commuting in daily for work.”) And that someone is Acting Mayor Family Values, who almost certainly cannot account for his whereabouts on 6 January 2021 if you get what I’m saying.

Rafe does manage to go through with the suspension of Drunk Shawn, but then Rawlings proceeds to Make Salem Great Again and fires Rafe!

Which sucks, because I was just finally getting to like Rafe a bit. But also because, as far as I can tell, this makes Jada the only active cop in Salem now.

Well, unless you count Officer Skippy, the guy whose pants got stolen at the hospital a few weeks ago. But what’s the likelihood that this new Acting Mayor puts an inept, inexperienced white dude in charge over the woman of color?

#days of our lives #dool #peacock #soap opera

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inexchangeforyoursoul · 1 year

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Whoops I forgot to post, save organize these, so the blogging will be a mess/// one volume at a time though, one at a time

SO ANYWAY, second one.

Bring tissues and something to lower blood pressure because some parts will have the goo in your vessels boiling and not everyone gets their just desserts - yet.

One thing to point out in general is that this volume is very flashback heavy and all of these are depressing, really. The order of things is basically as follows: crying, laughing, gay, mission impossible, intermission, well shit, angry, and crying. Has a snot framing, if you like.

I'd say it's a solid 8.0 as the three flashbacks come with a windfall of flavor text, though this is also the reason they are enjoyable short stories of their own. I wasn’t all that into the middle one, though. Maybe obecause of its fragmented structure. Oh, and gay rating is 5 bc there's like one kith but then not really. It's the only real breather in the whole shebang so savor it.

So, quick characters update. But mostly for the supporting cast because Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji are doing their usual shenanigans and gay panic until the last chapter. All in all, Wei Wuxian is hella embarrassed about tween him and slowly he's beginning his own gay panic. It's funny. Also it turns out he semi-accidentally started a revolution. As he would… and as he should. He’s also a very good teacher, I really respect that.

The first person, or rather group I’d like to talk about is the Xiao gang,,, A-Qing is among the bravest people around and I hope her and Xiao will be okay, although I'm not worried because they are in good hands. Ohana means family, and family means no one gets left behind. That's all. (Fuck, I'm crying again,,,, moving swiftly along,)

(theirs is the best flashback imo)

Xue Yang gives me like,,, especially warped Toga Himiko vibes if you know what I mean. At one point, he has no way to get the “candy” he so desperately wants and the realization is where he really goes crazy, obsessed with that victim to the point of mimicking him as best as he can. Whether it's for revenge still, or a way to make the victim out to be something he wanted him to be, OR even vica versa, envying what the other had and wanting to become more like the other(s), is left hanging in the air. He’s probably doing his own weird roleplaying gig out here in his personal shrek swamp and has long lost contact with the outside world.

He definitely deserves what he has coming, but with the little additional things sprinkled in, it is still just… sad and regrettable. I think we'll hear from him in the future, one way or another(TM).

Jin Ling is even younger than I thought?? (Fifteen instead of seventeen, dude. Fifteen. You have no business running off alone, kiddo.) and has never ceased worrying me. He's confused and angry and I don't blame him for what's happened.

Speaking of Jin Ling, the thing I want to keep him away from the most is his uncle. The other one. As in, the other one who is officially his uncle. That guy is a deranged control freak and it's definitely in him to either kill the kid himself or have someone else do it for him. Or trick them into doing it. Someone else I'm not gonna name again had to learn the nuances of these things somewhere. I hope this mofo will be the first real victim to Jin Ling's new trick, hell, I want it to be the thing to tip the scales. After all, he isn't supposed to know that.

I'm glad the Lan boys are not around to see this shitstorm. They've had enough to deal with for the time being.

I really like Wen Ning, hope he becomes permanent comic relief. Mainly because as of right now, I desperately need either that or some soft bonding time. Him and Wei Wuxian seem like the best of friends and it warms my torn little heart. I'm also wondering how they met because the Wen name certainly does not scream friendly or nice, but he sure seems to be. I imagine him having, like, the softest voice for some reason...

Anyhow, later the Wen duches do pop out of the woodworks and yeah they definitely are no good news, hell, along with uncle, they are the most despicable kind of people up till now. The reason is as simple as posing as heroes when they are actually unabashed villains

I will also disclose my opinion that young Mo Xuanyu may have been a victim of something other than just getting outed and promptly ostracized. He either made a mistake to get mad or got the pointy end of something to “help” him there. Explains it more than anything else.

Anyway, cat's out of the bag and we are kinda on the run now.

#Kate reads

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deripmaver · 3 years

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laurent is a good person - book 1 meta

one of the most amazing things about captive prince is how the reveals in book 3 recontextualize all of the scenes leading up to them, including about laurent himself. in book one, all we see is damen pov as he’s being abused and humiliated by this supposedly spoiled, vile ice prince. when the regent comes to damen and subtly (and not so subtly) insults laurent, calling him unfit to rule - well, why would he think anything different? laurent has insulted him, had him whipped within an inch of his life, and even attempted to (and later successfully lmfao) have him raped while drugged out of his mind.

after book 3 we can reread most if not all of book 1 as a very traumatized boy who has finally been confronted with the man who killed his brother, leaving him alone with his abusive uncle, and who he clearly has made into a complete monster in his own mind. damen of course sees him as a complete bitch, but there’s textual/subtextual evidence that laurent is well liked, and that his behavior during book 1 was actually pretty out of character for him. i’d like to provide some examples of that now!!!!

“Laurent had stopped dead the moment he had seen Damen, his face turning white as though in reaction to a slap, or an insult. Damen’s view, half-truncated by the short chain at this neck, had been enough to see that. But Laurent’s expression had shuttered quickly.” Captive Prince, Chapter One

i couldn’t resist adding this one in hehe. laurent recognizes damen!! he’s come down, knowing his uncle has devised another truly horrendous and triggering “gift” and that he’ll lose support if he calls it our for what it truly is, only to find out that it’s fucking damianos of akielos sent to him as a sex slave. a jab at laurent’s trauma about auguste and also a jab at laurent’s frigid sexuality - which ofc is completely the regent’s fault. fuck that guy so much lmfao

“‘It’s so rare to see you at these entertainments, Your Highness,’ said Vannes.” Captive Prince, Chapter Two.

this is right before the fight between govart and damen in the ring, of course. damen sees laurent as depraved and vile as the sexual sadism on display by the veretian court, and considers him to be a willing purveyor of it. this is wrong, of course, as said by vannes here. laurent has only shown up because he wants to humiliate damen lmfao.

“He did remember being supported by two of the guards, here, in this room, while Radel stared athis back in horror. ‘The Prince really . . . did this.’ ‘Who else?’ Damen said. Radel had stepped forward, and slapped Damen across the face; it was a hard slap, and the man wore three rings on each finger. ‘What did you do to him?’ Radel demanded.” Captive Prince, Chapter Four

this scene, to me, was the most telling lmfao. it’s right after damen is whipped. you could argue that radel is just a servant in the employ of the royal household, so is of course going to be loyal to the prince, but he seems genuinely surprised of the prince’s cruelty towards damen. not only that, but he slaps him and immediately assumes damen must have done something. which - i mean, technically he did lmao. not necessarily enough to deserve having the skin flayed from his back, but you know. if laurent was in the habit of torturing pets and slaves, why would the overseer react this way?

“The men guarding him were the Prince’s Guard, and had no affiliation with the Regent whatsoever. It surprised Damen how loyal they were to their Prince, and how diligent in his service, airing none of the grudges and complaints that he might have expected, considering Laurent’s noxious personality. Laurent’s feud with his uncle they took up wholeheartedly; there were deep schisms and rivalries between the Prince’s Guard and the Regent’s Guard, apparently.” Captive Prince, Chapter Four

laurents relationships with his guards are also some of the biggest indicators that he isn’t just a spoiled brat, but can insire a deep loyalty in his men. even if they do all want to fuck him. ah, sexual harassment. it’s also hilarious that damen immediately assumes they’re loyal to him because they want to fuck him - nice projection there, dude. we know a bit more about laurent and his guards thanks to green but for a season, but this little bit here is interesting.

“Laurent was indeed good at talking. He accepted sympathy gracefully. He put his position rationally. He stopped the flow of talk when it became dangerously critical of his uncle. He said nothing that could be taken as an open slight on the Regency. Yet no one who talked to him could have any doubt that his uncle was behaving at best misguidedly and at worst treasonously.” Captive Prince, Chapter Five

idek what to say here. laurent my beloved <3333

“‘When someone doesn’t like you very much, it isn’t a good idea to let them know that you care about something,’ said Laurent. Damen felt himself turn ashen, as the threat sank in. ‘Would it hurt worse than a lashing for me to cut down someone you care for?’ said Laurent.” Captive Prince, Chapter Seven

this isn’t really relevant to my thesis lmfao i just love this exchange bc it gives SO MUCH information about laurent and his uncle in just three lines of dialogue. what has the regent done, who did he cut down just to hurt laurent? when and how did laurent learn that? p a i n

“Laurent’s fussy horse began acting out again, and he leaned forward in the saddle, murmuring something as he stroked her neck in an uncharacteristically gentle gesture to quiet her.” Captive Prince, Chapter Nine.

HORSEY NO- lmfao this scene just hurts so badly on the reread. especially later on, in book 3 i think, where laurent says something like “i provoked my uncle.” he’s really blaming himself for his uncle KILLING HIS HORSE, his horse that his murdered brother trained, one of the only living connections to auguste... all because his uncle could not let a single miniscule plan laurent had set go through without some kind of repercussion. literally all laurent did was do something to stop an innocent group of people from being abused, nothing to undermine his uncle’s rule, but because the regent is VILE he could not let laurent have even this. he’s so good with her, too. he must have known by this point and also known that there was no way to stop this. P A I N

“‘I know that you have somehow arranged this,’ said Erasmus. He was incapable of hiding what he felt, and just seemed to radiate embarrassed happiness. ‘You kept your promise. You and your master. I told you he was kind,’ Erasmus said. ‘You did,’ said Damen. He was pleased to see Erasmus happy. Whatever Erasmus believed about Laurent, Damen wasn’t going to dissuade him. ‘He’s even nicer in person. Did you know he came and talked to me?’ said Erasmus. ‘—He did?’ said Damen. It was something he couldn’t imagine. ‘He asked about . . . what happened in the gardens. Then he warned me. About last night.’ ‘He warned you,’ said Damen. ‘He said that Nicaise would make me perform before the court and it would be awful, but that if I was brave, something good might come at the end of it.’ Erasmus looked up at Damen curiously. ‘Why do you look surprised?’ ‘I don’t know. I shouldn’t be. He likes to plan things in advance,’ said Damen.” Captive Prince, Chapter 9.

this is the first in-text confirmation we have that laurent has a good heart beneath his layers and layers of trauma-induced lashing out. book one often skeeves people out because of its graphic and, honestly, yes, kind of sexualized depiction of rape, slavery, and depravity, but beneath it all you meet these two protagonists who are going to have all of their most deeply held views about each other challenged. laurent from very early on is shaken to his core when damen refuses to rape nicaise in the ring - it cracks the very foundations of the person he’d built up in his head as this horrible monster who killed his brother in cold blood. and damen keeps defying laurents expectations by being a good person through and through. on the other hand, laurent spends the first part of the book taking out years of anger on damen, but here for the first time we see him do something just because its the kind thing to do. yes, torveld is an ally against his uncle, but laurent has clearly been scheming with him for a while now, and he’s now overlooking his hatred of damen and working with him just because none of the slaves deserve whats happened to them. it’s such a sweet moment.

“One of the other men, eyeing them, approached a moment later. ‘Don’t mind Jean. He’s in a foul mood. He was the one had to stick a sword through the mare’s throat and put her down. The Prince tore strips off him for not doing it fast enough.’” Captive Prince, Chapter Nine.

HORSEY NO- pt 2. this is just another really sweet and sad detail - laurent being so upset that the horse’s death could have been more painless. it must have hurt so much to see her in pain, and to know that the only way for that pain to end was being put down as quickly as possible. i wuv him. im sad

that’s it, though there are still a few more chapters left in the book. this isn’t providing any new information, of course, the path of the three books is to show that laurent isnt the man we meet in book one, that he’s actually sweet, and earnest, and he’s been fighting his own battle practically alone against his abuser since he was fifteen years old. also, the reveal that laurent knew who damianos was from the start makes it clear imo that all of his violence in book 1 was supposed vengence, not... him being evil. he apologizes explicitly in-text, and also, all of the acts of violence he commits cause serious problems for him in terms of his future alliance which he then needs to fix. i just love how layered these books are, how there’s so much information in them that makes rereading almost more fun than reading them for the very first time!

#Captive Prince #captive prince meta #damen x laurent #Laurent of Vere #Damianos of Akielos

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bastillewolf · 4 years

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Shinigami Eyes (II)

Pairing: Corpse Husband / Reader

Summary: After you distastefully kill Corpse in a game of Among Us, he wants you to make it up to him and invites you to come over for the week.

Notes: Thank you so much for the love on the previous chapter, I’ve never gotten this many notes before. I hope you enjoy, and maybe leave an ask if you want to? I can’t promise I have time to do them, but I’ll pick out a couple.

Also, I might rewrite this. I kinda rushed it because I wanted to finish it by tonight, but there will be a final and third chapter to this afterwards. Please do let me know what you think.

Tag list CLOSED!

Shinigami Eyes - Pt. II

5… 4… 3… 2… 1…

Impostor

You were teamed up with Sean.

Your fist violently slammed down on the desk. “Goddammit! I don’t want to be impostor anymore! This game has no compassion for my poor nerves.” It was the third time in a row now, and you were really craving to do normal tasks now without all the scheming. “Fuck it, I don’t care if they kill me. I’m just gonna do my thing without thinking about it.”

You decide to follow Toast for a bit to watch him do some task. You kill him in Laboratory. You vent back to Launchpad and take your time walking towards MedBay while the kill button restores. You meet up with Corpse, and follow him while pretending to do wires in the Y-hallway. You watched the green bar go up, and continued. Sabotaging and then fixing lights, you made sure your place with Corpse was settled. Then the body of Lily was reported.

As you expected, Corpse easily vouched for you as he’d seen you do a task. The round was skipped, though Rae was sussed for ‘chasing’ Sean, by his own words.

“Corpse, you’ve grown weak,” you muttered to chat.

You were in Greenhouse, and decided it would be best to kill him there and sabotage Reactor. “Sorry baby, but I can’t keep following you around.” You quickly set off Reactor and murdered him in front of the plants. “Your blood shall keep the plants hydrated.” You did an evil laugh. “Pretty sure that’s not how it works, though.”

You vented down to MedBay and as you walked out you met up with Rae. She’d be the vouch who would confirm you weren’t anywhere near Greenhouse. “I’ll just have to fix my own sabotage so they’ll never suspect me.” You helped her with the handprint, and noted Sykkuno and Felix being there. Sean sabotaged lights, you killed Sykkuno, and ran out to follow Lily into Laboratory. Felix reported the body.

“Holy shit,” Rae gasped. So far, five people had died. You only needed to kill one more person. “It was Felix!”

“Wait, what?” the man in question asked. “I was fixing Reactor!”

She mentioned that only you, Sykkuno, Felix and herself had been there and that you’d helped her do handprint. “Sykkuno must have fixed it, and then you killed him!”

Sean asked if you’d seen anything.

“No, the lights were out. I followed Rae into Laboratory after the scan.” Your voice didn’t tremble or raise, a tactic you’d taken up from the best lair in the group. Well, the one who was now dead. Oops. “I haven’t seen Felix this entire game, though.”

He was evidently at a loss for words, so the group was quick to vote for him.

Pewds was ejected.

Victory.

You thanked Sean for a good game who was laughing his ass off. “I can’t believe you did Corpse like that! Poor guy!”

“I deadass thought you were innocent,” Corpse replied, “I’m hurt.”

“Why do you still sound dark and menacing when you say something like that?!”

You agreed with Sean heartily, “He’s just salty I’ve bested him at his own game.”

“Hey now, no need to actually insult me.”

The group laughed. You decided to call it for the night, right before Corpse did the same.”

***

He was calling you again. “What is it this time, you salty?”

“Salty? Nah, never,” he said, but you weren’t convinced.

“Then why you calling?”

“What, I can’t call my friends after playing a nice round of Among Us?”

“Not when you lost the game and you call the person who you lost to. Kinda sus, dude.”

“Alright, maybe a little salty.” You smirked.

“Aw, you need me to make it up to you?”

He laughed. “What did you have in mind?”

A bunch of thoughts, most not rated PG-13, crossed your mind. You were suddenly starting to feel uncomfortable. This was probably just something innocent, which got twisted in your fucked-up mind. You shrugged, “Uh… I don’t know.”

“I got an idea.”

“What is it?”

“Come over this week. You said you needed a break, right?”

“That sounds more like you’re doing me a favour instead of me making it up to you.”

“I don’t have any friends. You’d be making it up to me by being the first physical person here in years. I usually don’t invite people over.”

“Wow, I’m flattered. So, you don’t consider me to be your friend after all?”

“You know that’s not what I meant,” he chuckled.

“Sure, sure. Tell me that again when my presence suddenly brightens your life making you not want to get rid of me, ever.”

“I’ll keep it in mind.”

***

You walk through the gates following a hoard of people, all the while still feeling drowsy from not getting any sleep during your flight. At least you didn’t have any turbulence and landed safely. Glancing around here and there with no result, you figured Corpse would be waiting outside, until you spotted a figure clad in black a little ends away by the escalator. You were glad you were still awake enough to have found him, because he appeared to silently linger halfway behind a fern.

At least, you hoped it was him. The only indications were his clothes, mask and dark hair. You saw him run a hand through it, and identified the chipped black nail polish and familiar rings. Oh yea, that was him alright.

He seemed to be paying more attention to the floor until he saw two feet appear in his line of sight. “Hey,” you awkwardly greeted. A bit taken a back, he replied, “Oh, wow. Hey.” A mask was covering the bottom of his face, but as far as you could see his eyes were a very dark shade.

“Wow?” you repeated. He chuckled, scratching the back of his head. “Yea, sorry. It’s a compliment.” You held your elbow out in a safe-distance gestured hello, but he shrugged you off. “You’re gonna be staying with me anyways.” Suddenly in a daze, you felt him wrap his arms around your waist and instantly hugged him back. His baggy sweater felt warm and soft to the touch, and strands of hair tickled your face. You very much tried to repress your smile and blush, but how could you? Hugging someone wasn’t supposed to feel this good. When he pulled back he reached down to take your suitcase from you. “I don’t own a car, is it okay if we take a cab?”

“Y-Yeah, of course,” you stuttered, “But it’s on me. Same with food and stuff.” “Don’t worry about it,” he chuckled. “No, you’re letting me stay with you and a hotel would’ve been a lot more expensive than this. It’s my treat.” “Yeah, we’ll see.” He gave you a look and even with the mask you could tell he was smirking underneath it.

It’s about half an hour drive to his apartment complex, and it’s rather nice. “All that YouTube money paying off, huh?” you asked in amusement. “You’d know,” he replied. You insisted on carrying your suitcase up the stairs yourself, which he silently shook his head at, until after a few flights he noticed you struggling and settled on carrying the thing in between the two of you. “How many clothes did you bring?” “Oh, it’s mostly filled with bricks I might need to throw at your head.” He laughed at that.

His apartment was simple, but cosy. “Home sweet home,” he said, almost sarcastically. You furrowed your brow at him. “I’m sure you could’ve had it a lot worse.” He reluctantly agreed.

He helped you set down your luggage in what appeared to be his bedroom, where the curtains were still closed and the black bedsheets fresh. He had a few pieces of fanart up on his wall, and some on his closet. You turned to him and gave him a look. “You’re not sleeping on the couch.”

He quickly shook his head, “You’re not sleeping there. If you won’t let me sleep on the couch I’ll sleep on the floor.”

“If you’re sleeping on the floor, I’m sleeping on the floor.”

“Yeah, we’ll see about that,” he murmured. “What?” “Nothing.”

He suggested playing video games as you were both too tired to do anything else. You’d landed quite late yet were still confused about what time it actually was. Flying is weird. You hopped onto his couch and grabbed a controller.

He sat down next to you, but suddenly seemed tenser than before.

“You okay? You can just go to sleep if you want to.”

He shook his head, “Nah, I don’t sleep a lot. It’s fine.”

You didn’t stop looking at him, though. He was still wearing that mask. “You don’t have to take it off, if you don’t want to. I understand if it makes you uncomfortable.”

“It’s not that, I just…” He took a deep breath. You hadn’t expected him to take it off then and there. You stared at him, your mouth slightly agape, controller barely held by your numb hands.

“Disappointed?”

It was as if he was expecting you to make a face or something, but you didn’t give him anything, except for a blatant “Nope” and an “Are we gonna play now or what?”

“You don’t have anything else to say?”

You shrugged, and looked him up and down again. “You’re kind of what I imagined you to be.”

“What’s that?”

“Handsome.”

Neither of you could stop smiling for the rest of the night.

You eventually forced him to sleep in his own bed, even going as far as to shove him into the room and keep your weight against the door so he couldn’t get out, so he eventually relented. “Inviting you here was a mistake.” “How come? All I’ve done so far is look after you!” “You’re a nightmare.”

You mostly stayed in for the week, which you didn’t mind at all. Being in such a closed-off environment with someone you got along with was nice. He attempted to get you to lift the weights in his room and succeeded for around fifteen minutes until you nearly dropped a dumbbell on your foot. You ordered take-out from his favourite restaurant, watched horror movies until you adapted to his sleeping schedule because you were too scared to close your eyes now, and even streamed a bit together with your friends.

“Wait, is Corpse with you?” Rae had asked.

“No, I’m at Corpse’s. He’s sitting across from me so I can’t see his screen but we’re gonna have to share the Discord unless you want to hear an echo.”

“Ah, man! You got to see his face, too?” Sykkuno whined.

“Stop simping, Sykkuno. You get enough attention from him already.”

“Don’t worry, I still love you,” Corpse said.

“Huh?”

It was probably a good thing that you got teamed up again, because you could indeed start to see his hands shaking right as the word ‘impostor’ appeared on the screen. You reached over and stroked it with your thumb. He smiled gratefully back at you.

“Just please,” he pleaded later that day, “Sleep in the bed. If only for one night.”

“No. I’ve heard about and now seen your sleeping habits. If you take the couch you’re never going to get any sleep.” You made a real effort to show him how comfortable you were – even though your back had started to hurt already after the first night – by crawling underneath your blanket and rubbing your head into the soft pillow. He snorted.

Next thing, you feel yourself being lifted by an arm underneath your knees and one around your back. “Corpse! Put me the fuck down!” you shrieked. You knew he lifted weights, but how the hell did he still have the energy as an insomniac? He ungracefully dropped you onto the matrass and turned the lights off. “Good night.”

You quickly got hold of the back of his hoodie before he could leave and pulled. He fell down next to you with a low huff. “Fine, I’ll sleep in the bed. But only if you sleep here too.”

“I snore.”

“Don’t care.”

For some reason, there wasn’t any tension or awkwardness. You were comfortable, and the soft rhythm of his breathing seemed to soothe you. He called out your name, to see if you were still awake.

“Hm?”

“…Thanks for coming over.”

“Any time.”

This was how you would spend the rest of the nights, and whenever either of you woke up suddenly curled up around the other, you didn’t mention it or move away from it. It was the first time in years Corpse got a few nights of complete rest.

#corpse husband #Corpse #corpse husband x reader #corpse x reader #youtube #youtube fanfiction #pewdiepie #jacksepticeye

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thesolferino · 3 years

Text

Hell On Earth

⤷ dream x f!reader.

⤷ genre: fluff

⤷ word count: 3.2k

⤷ requested: yes, by this lovely anon!

— summary: you barge into clay’s office to complain about his broken air conditioner, unaware that he’s streaming.

Florida was hell.

You liked to say it as a joke, during October when the rest of the world was freezing, during December when the insane temperatures finally went back under control, and the sun granted you its blessing of a refreshing gust of wind every now and then. You liked to say it as a joke, mostly, but God, did you mean it whenever summer would creep around the corner and you’d get reminded of why you told your boyfriend so often that the devil must’ve left hell, came down to America, and bought himself a nice penthouse in Florida.

It lived up to its title of the hottest state in the US, by far, considering the hellish temperatures that constantly made you dizzy whenever June rolled around. You had great air conditioning in your apartment, though, and as soon as the sun started burning skin, plants, water, and everything in its way, you and your college roommate would lounge at your place as the air conditioner blew cold wind and thank the lord (and the person who invented AC, bless his heart) for providing you with at least one blessing during these trying times.

So, of course that as soon as summer came about, your air conditioning conveniently broke.

Your roommate was out of the apartment within two days, flying to her family in Wisconsin, bidding you farewell as she left you to cook like a raw chicken in your shared apartment. Thankfully, you had a boyfriend - and what a boyfriend he was.

You don’t like to brag, but at these moments, you feel grateful to the universe and whoever else is looking over you for providing you with a rich boyfriend, with quite a big, echo-y house, and air conditioning made of pure heaven. As soon as your roommate packed your bags, you packed yours too, - if one backpack filled with makeup, your laptop, meds, underwear and hopes that he’d let you steal all of his clothes could count as “bags” - locked the apartment and left, ready to leave the AC on snowman temperature for two days minimum and ignore all his complaints.

Bad luck seemed to follow you everywhere, though, because you were there for merely three days when the air conditioning started stuttering.

You were sprawled on the cold sheets of his bed, listening to the low hum of the AC as you scrolled through your phone, his white T-shirt sticking to your back, the cold air cooling the sheen of sweat that covered your body, leaving goosebumps all over. One of your fingers started lazily petting Patches’ stomach, and you could faintly hear Clay talking in the background, the sounds coming from his office.

“Thank you for the gifted subs! Um, yeah, it’s really hot here, I can barely, like, breathe in here. I have the AC on at highest, but all it’s doing is giving me a headache. Even-even my water bottle is completely hot.” You heard him rant and chuckled, turning on your side and continuing to scroll through random videos.

You sort of tuned out his talking, knowing he’d most likely be cooped up in that office for hours before your shared dinner, and started watching random YouTube videos, ignoring your surroundings as you shoved your earbuds in your ears.

The longer the videos lasted, the more you felt like you were suffocating. The heat crawled up on you slowly, sneakily, almost unnoticeable yet undeniably there, hand made up of pure fire gripping at your throat tighter and tighter. It started off seamlessly, with you rolling around, trying to find a new cold spot on the sheets, to pulling at the shirt, trying to create cold air to soothe you, to wiping the sweat that basically covered your entire forehead, when your eyes finally peeled away from your phone and you realised you were basically choking in the heat, feeling like you’re breathing fire.

You lift your head off the bed way too quickly, head pounding, and look at the one thing meant to save you from this madness - just to see it leaking water down the wall, barely coughing out any air. Your head miserably falls back down on the bed, hands rubbing at your face, dangerously close to both crying and screaming in distress. After a few moments of self-wallowing, you get up and make your way over to your boyfriend’s office, being met with nothing but silence as you walked to it, happy he ended the stream so you could complain and wail to him, possibly cool down using the AC in his office.

You slam the door open, seeing him hunched over in his gaming chair, Minecraft open as usual, and as soon as he takes one headphone off, turns around and sends a surprised but oddly panicked gaze your way, you start ranting.

“Babe, you won’t believe what just happened.” you said, rubbing a hand over your face again, eyes closing as you feel the coldness - in comparison to the living hell that was his bedroom right now - of the room wash over you. You don’t even let him speak before you continue.

“The fucking AC in your bedroom just broke. It’s leaking right now.”

Clay looks like he wants to say fifteen words at once, and the first one that comes out is: “What?”

“I swear. I was watching something on my phone, and I realised it’s crazy hot, so I looked up and realised it’s broken. Why does this happen to me!” you complained, and he tried pulling his headphones off for a second but instead pulled the cord out of the computer entirely, letting you hear everything that goes on in his headphones.

It’s silent for a second or two, before you hear a familiar voice.

“Dream.” you hear a British man with an awfully posh accent speak, and your eyes meet Clay’s in pure horror and realisation, when you slap a hand over your mouth. He looks as equally terrified as you, but also disappointed, because oh, that’s why he looked so panicked when you stormed in.

Then you hear another voice, equally British, but higher pitched. They laugh. “Is that Drista?”

Clay seems to snap back into reality, turning around towards the computer and adjusting his mic before speaking. “No- it’s- Tommy she said babe, why would Drista call me babe?”

“You’re so stupid, he was trying to help you.” You hear his long-time friend, Sapnap, deadpan, and you can practically feel all of them freaking out, while you stand in the doorway in horror, cheeks heating up despite the fully working AC.

Another laugh. “No, I wasn’t, I was genuinely asking. Why- Sapnap, why would I be helping Dream?”

“Dream, you are so stupid.” you hear George laugh into his mic and your boyfriend immediately starts stuttering, trying to defend himself.

“How-how am I stupid?! She’s the one who walked in, what was I supposed to do?” you lean against the doorway as he defends himself, head buried in one of your hands.

“Mute!” you hear Sapnap borderline yell, almost mad.

“Wait- I don’t get what’s going on- Does Big D have a girlfriend?” you hear the British boy, Tommy, ask, and all of them go silent for a few seconds before a loud, screeching laugh breaks out through the speakers, and when Clay turns around to look at you, all you can do is mouth an apology as you almost break out into laughter at how ridiculous the whole thing is.

“Oh my God, chat is going crazy right now.” George says while Tommy is laughing his lungs out in the background, still.

“Did you actually- did she actually- oh my GOD, Dream has a girlfriend! I can’t believe this!” Tommy keeps on laughing, coughing between sentences. “Dream stans, I am so sorry, this must be just a terrible, terrible day for you all.”

“You’re probably already trending on Twitter, dude.” Sapnap adds, sounding more worried than your own boyfriend did at the moment.

“It was bound to happen at some point, I guess.” he huffs out, turning around to look at you every so often, gesturing for you to close the door and come in, which you did, guilt weighing you down as you moved.

“Are you serious? Can I- Can I speak to your girlfriend, Dream?” you can practically hear the grin in the boy’s voice and Clay doesn’t even turn to you before replying.

“No, you can’t.”

“Oh, come on! You let me speak to your mum but not your girlfriend? Just for a little bit, please? I just- I just wanna see which lucky woman managed to get the attention of the Minecraft God, Dream himself. That’s it.” Tommy asks and you don’t even have it in you to laugh because of the anxiety that eats away at you, but then Clay sighs.

“...Fine, I guess.” he looks up at you. “D’you wanna speak to Tommy?”

You’re not quite sure what the expected answer is, but you shrug, gaze darting from his eyes to the computer, and then back to him. “Um… I don’t mind, I guess.”

You hear him sigh and plug the headphones back into the computer, handing them to you. “Alright, she said yes. Here you go.” he stands up out of the chair and lets you sit, placing the way too big headphones on your head as your heart races, standing closely by your side as you roll the chair further towards the desk and microphone.

“Um… hello?” you shyly speak, and you hear something like groans of mixed annoyance, confusion and nervousness coming from George and Sapnap as Tommy starts laughing immediately, greeting you loudly.

“HELLO, DREAM’S GIRLFRIEND!” you hear him yell in response as your shaky hands land on the keyboard, moving his character left and right.

“Is the AC really broken?” Sapnap asks and you hear George laugh in response, considering how unimportant that information is right now. You know both of them, obviously - you’ve talked to them more than a few times, joining in on their jokes when Clay talks to them on speaker, growing as close as one can with their boyfriend’s friends.

“Yeah, it is. The AC in here is really good, though. Maybe I should stay and just take over the Dream channel.” You joke and they laugh.

“Yeah, I mean it would probably be better. A woman owning the Dream channel would make it so much better. The views would skyrocket.” Tommy says and you see his character walk up to you before he randomly laughs again.

“I can’t believe- I can’t believe Dream actually has a girlfriend. Is he, like, paying you to do this, or are you really…” he trails off and you giggle at his question, switching tools in the hotbar as you try to figure out how to play the game again.

“No, he’s not. We are dating, yes.” you confirm with a nod, and you feel Clay’s elbow sink into the chair, almost trying to listen.

“Say 1 if he’s keeping you hostage.” he says and you laugh again, shaking your head.

“No, he’s not- he’s not keeping me hostage.” you reply and you hear Clay go “WHAT?” right behind you.

“Well, of course, of course, I mean, who could ever pass up dating the great Dream. With all those subscribers, and Twitch primes, and Minecraft skills. Did- did his Minecraft skills get you?” Tommy asked, but before you could even respond, Sapnap jumped into the conversation.

“Oh yes, absolutely. She loves it. Yes, Dream, speedrun faster!” he sarcastically replies and for a few moments the whole call is blown into loud laughter, screeching and yells before it quiets down.

“Yes, what Sapnap said. I was so impressed, he just blew me away, with um… with his, um, Manhunt skills? I dunno, I don’t play Minecraft.” you hear him laugh at “Manhunt skills” behind you as the rest of the boys start laughing too.

“Dream’s girlfriend doesn’t play Minecraft?! What?! Dream- how could he allow this, seriously…” Tommy argued dramatically, his character staring at yours - or rather Clay’s.

“I can’t imagine if we were both Minecraft players, that would be a nightmare.” you replied.

“Why?” you heard George laugh through the headphones.

“Who do you think peels him away from the damn computer? If I was just like him we would never get out of the house, probably.” you argued.

“Dreamfriend, what is Dream like, you know, in real life?” Tommy spoke up and you heard George giggle again.

“Dreamfriend?” you repeated, a grin forming on your face at his stupidity, finally deciding to move the character around and switch back to the sword in the hotbar.

“Yes! Dream’s girlfriend, Dreamfriend, Dreamgirl, Girldream, whatever you like.” Tommy said and you laughed.

“Dream girl… if I wanted to get clout off Dream I’d use that, that’s genius.”

“Thanks, I know I’m a genius, everyone tells me so.” Tommy claims and you shake your head, checking your boyfriend’s inventory to see if there’s anything interesting in there.

“Alright, I’m gonna check on the AC, I’ll be back in a second.” Clay says to you, before lowering himself to the mic so the boys could hear him. “Tommy, don’t do anything stupid, okay?”

“Oh you know it, big man! I’d never!” Tommy yells back, despite Clay being unable to hear him, and he leaves the office with one last, quick kiss to your temple.

“Is he gone?” Tommy asks, and you nod and hum, despite him not being able to see you.

“Okay, so you don’t play Minecraft, right?” he asks.

“No, I don’t.” you reply.

“So there’s this really cool thing, right. If you just go in and type /op tommyinnit, there’s this thing that’s gonna-” Tommy doesn’t get to finish his sentence before he’s cut off by Sapnap, whose character suddenly appears in front of you.

“No, no, no, no, don’t trust him, you should-” Sapnap cuts in, but Tommy still loudly protests in the background.

“BE NICE TO OUR GUEST, SAPNAP! Let her do what she wants! She is Dream’s girlfriend after all, the most powerful woman.” Tommy claims and you laugh, sort of blushing from all the attention. You don’t even dare to check the chat or the donations that come in from Twitch, because it must be blowing up by now. As if he can hear your thoughts, George speaks too.

“Oh my God, Dream’s already trending on, like, five different spots on Twitter.” he says, and you instinctively grab your phone to check, before you can even think about it.

“What?” you and Sapnap both say in sync.

“Yeah, ‘Dream’ is trending #2 worldwide, and ‘Dream girlfriend’ is #4.” he lets out a shocked laugh.

“Oh my God…” you mutter out in both excitement, nervousness and dread as you open Twitter and confirm that George is indeed correct. You don’t even dare to press on either of the trends, simply turning off your phone with a sigh and moving back to stream.

“Wow, you’re famous now! How does it feel?” Tommy asks and you let out a quite dry laugh.

“Amazing. I can feel my value as a person increasing as we speak.” you respond sarcastically and hear George quietly laugh in the background.

Just then, you hear the door to the office opening again, but you ignore it because Tommy starts speaking.

“Okay, well, I’m sure that must be very fun and exciting for you, but I really will need you to type in /op tommyinn-”

“No! I’m not listening to you, Tommy! I’m not about to type in some stupid command and get yelled at!” you cut in, but he keeps on whining.

“Come on, we know Big D would never yell at his… beloved girlfriend! Listen, just do it, I promise he will not be mad.” he argues.

“What does /op even mean?” you ask out loud, and suddenly Clay is yelling behind you.

“Who is asking you to op them? Give me the headset!” he says, one hand already tugging at the headphones as you laugh while Tommy panics.

“Well, it was fun talking to you guys, but I have to go. Bye!” you bid them farewell and heard George and Sapnap say goodbye as well while Tommy yelled, and you took off the headphones and passed them to Clay who immediately put them on and adjusted them, plopping back into the chair. You left, moving to the living room to process everything that happened and abandon your phone for the next few hours because you were not ready for that type of attention in the slightest.

You laid in front of the TV, watching random shows on Netflix and grabbing a few snacks from the kitchen while you could still clearly hear him yelling and streaming, wondering how he’s still going as if nothing happened. The temptation to check what people were saying was overwhelming to the point your hands were itching to grab your phone and open all social media - before you even realised it, you were on the trending page again, thumb tapping on the “Dream girlfriend” tab.

You braced yourself for the worst, but that’s not what came at you - sure, there were a couple of tweets telling people to lay off you, and delusional shippers getting ratioed, but they were mostly positive, lighthearted jokes, from single people making jokes about how a Minecraft YouTuber can get bitches but they can’t, to people calling you cute/funny. One hate comment obviously stings more than a million positive comments make you happy, but they were mostly misogynists calling you annoying for the roughly five sentences you spoke on stream or shippers disappointed that their favorite YouTuber isn’t gay, so you didn’t really let it get to you.

When the house finally quieted down the sun was lowering itself into darkness and melting into a pot of blinding orange and golden honey, and you heard Clay’s footsteps when he finally turned off the stream, stepping into the living room a few seconds after you heard him. He sat down on the couch next to you, wrapping an arm around your shoulders and pulling you close to him, sitting there in silence with you.

“So… that was something.” he finally broke the silence and you nodded.

“It really was.”

Another beat of silence passes.

“I’m sorry, baby, but I really need you to stop breaking all these ACs.”

“I’M NOT THE ONE BREAKING THEM-”

“Sorry, but I’m noticing a pattern here.” he wheezed, obviously just trying to get you riled up as you pulled away so his hand gets ripped off your shoulder.

“Shut up. You better have called someone to repair that damn thing, cause there is no way we’re sleeping in there without an AC.” you huffed, and he shuffled closer to you, arm wrapping itself around your shoulders once again.

“I did, they’re coming by tomorrow.” he assured.

“Tomorrow?” you asked, looking at him in disbelief. “How are we gonna sleep tonight?”

“Who says we have to sleep?” the glint in his eye and the stupid grin plastered on his face tells you everything you need to know, and you roll your eyes.

“If we fuck, I’ll actually die of overheating. Absolutely not.”

“Well in that case, I need to get that AC fixed as soon as possible.”

#dream x reader #dreamwastaken x reader #dream imagine #dream fluff #dreamwastaken imagine #dreamwastaken fluff #dream x y/n #dreamwastaken x y/n #dream x you #dreamwastaken x you #mcyt x reader #mcyt imagine #mcyt fluff

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donutloverxo · 3 years

Text

NSFW alphabet | Chris Evans

Please note that my stories are not to be stolen or reposted on any other site. Reblogs are welcome. This blog and this story is 18+. Do not read, follow or interact if you are not 18+.

Note - This is written just for fun. I don't know Chris or what he likes lol. I also don't own the alphabet format.

Dividers by @whimsicalrogers

Warnings - rpf, smut, daddy kink, d/s relationship, dom Chris, anal stuff, semi public sex, spanking, sex toys, praise kink.

Word count - 2.5k

A=Aftercare (What they’re like after sex)

Chris is clingy as fuck after sex. He’ll hold you close to his heart (you being the lil spoon of course) and not let go the entire night. With soft kisses on your face, hair and on any bruises he might have left on you. With some pillow talk about how his love for you can overwhelm him sometimes, that he can’t imagine not having you not that he gets to have a taste of you almost every night. Sometimes he likes to listen to you talk about your day, or share a deep secret you hadn’t told anyone else.

His clinginess is something you adore. Something which you would usually be fine with, how he just could not keep his hands off of you, but when you’re somewhere tropical and hot it becomes a bit of a problem.

You were visiting him while he was filming for red Sea diving resort, after seeing him in the beard and the longer hair you couldn’t help yourself and you just jumped on him. After some hot and sweaty sex, you had moved away from him a little, with your back to him you wiped the sheen off of your forehead with the back of your hand, trying to fan yourself with your own hand, ‘Where do you think you’re going?’ he had growled. Not wanting even an inch of distance between the two of you. You tried to protest because you needed to cool off but eventually gave in.

B=Body Part (Their favorite body part)

Everyone knows the answer to this. He likes your ass the most. It doesn’t matter if it’s a flat ass or a thick one he’ll love it the same because it’s a part of you. He likes to smack it, he likes looking at it, he may even like to fuck it. Some stretch marks would just be the cherry on top.

His next favorite would have to be your hips. He loves to see their silhouette through your yoga pants or jeans, or even a dress. After a night of some rough fucking they usually bear his handprints which he loves obviously because it’s almost like he branded you as his own.

C=Cum (Anything to do with cum basically... I’m a disgusting person)

It’s always a battle with the two of you when it comes to cumming. Because Chris likes to see your body covered in his seed, particularly your face, ass and breasts, and you like to have him do it inside you, be it your pussy or your mouth.

Which he doesn’t mind obviously, he likes the idea of his spend being in your tummy, but he also likes taking pictures of your ass covered with his spunk. You just look so pretty when he comes on your face🥺

D=Dirty Secret (Pretty self explanatory)

Chris has fucked you in more bathrooms than you can remember. It’s become a thing or almost a ritual now. Whenever he takes you to an event or a party, or just a casual dinner at his family or friends house, you’ll end up on your knees in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth, or he’ll worship you and eat you out till you literally can’t even walk straight.

It started when you accompanied him to an important event, he was extremely anxious. And you felt helpless because you didn’t know how to make him feel better. But you did know one thing that always lifts his mood up. So you dragged him to the men’s room and sucked him off. He was much relaxed the rest for the evening thanks to you.

E= Experience (How experienced are they?)

VERY. He’s extremely experienced. He has a lot of knowledge and puts it to good use on you. Which can be a little daunting if you’re more on the inexperienced side but don’t ne afraid. He’ll train you really well, you just have to be a good girl and listen.

F= Favorite Position

His favorite position would be doggy style. Where he’s doing from behind, with you on your hands and knees, or with your head down and ass perched up to him because you never can stay up right when he’s doing you so well. He has full access to your ass, if you’re okay with it he would use his fingers on you, spank your ass. He loves to grab your hips or your ass and your breasts.

He’s also a huge fan of missionary. Because he can’t see your pretty face, or look into your eyes from behind. Most days he wants intimacy and to show you how much he loves you.

G = Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc.)

Depends on his mood. Sometimes he’s a bit goofy, like talking in a comically exaggerated Boston accent when you told him you liked the sound of his voice and how his accent becomes more prominent when he is horny.

But most of the times, he’s in control. He has to maintain some composure so you wouldn’t question who’s really in charge or think that you could get away with anything. Because you know how to make him laugh, and if he let’s you do that he couldn’t keep a straight face while punishing you.

H = Hair (How well groomed are they, does the carpet match the drapes, etc.)

Chris has dark Brown pubic hair, like that of his beard and the hair on his head.

Does anyone remember that term ‘manscaping'? Where dudes trim their pubic hair to make their dicks look bigger. Chris definitely does that. Although he doesn’t need to because like if he got any bigger he might split you in two.

I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment, romantic aspect)

Doesn’t matter if you’re making love, or fucking hard it will always be intimate and loving with Chris in one way or another.

If you feel needy, and like you want him to show you how much he loves you, you just have to sit on his lap, bat your lashes at him, show him your puppy eyes, and hump his leg a little. He’d get the sign and take you to bed, slowly dragging his cock in and out of you, drawing it out for the both of you, his fingers laced with yours, pinned above your head. He’d feast on your breasts and nipples the whole time just so you could feel his love and need for days.

If you’re feeling particularly frisky, or in a mood to piss him off just so he could be rough with you without you having to ask, you can just give him attitude or roll your eyes a lot. He’ll spank your ass raw, or edge you for hours, or make you climax till it literally hurts, depends on his mood really, to teach you some manners. But since you like the punishment you never learn.

Even while he’s got you over his knee, you not wearing anything but the diamond necklace he gave you, your cheeks wet from crying for the past fifteen minutes, your ass on fire but you still had to take more from him. He tsked, reprimanding you for ruining his expensive dress pants with your slick, playing with your intimate lips, he’d say while stroking your head, “It’s okay, baby, daddy still loves you. Even when you get on my nerves.”

Even while fucking you like he hated you, he made you felt loved and as if you were the most precious person in the world.

J = Jack Off (Masturbation headcanon)

When you started dating, Chris would often masturbate to the thought of you. But when you started sleeping together he never felt the need to, and you asked him not to do it anymore because you didn’t want him wasting his cummies.

Which might’ve been a huge mistake in hindsight because you revealed a weakness of yours. Now when he REALLY wants to punish you, he’d just tie you up jerk off his cock right before your eyes, “See this, sweetheart? I could be fucking your sweet pussy right now, and making you feel good too, but you had go and be a bad girl.” He’d come all over your face or breasts, and would of course make you come too if he feels you’ve learned your lesson.

K = Kink (One or more of their kinks)

Chris has a huge daddy kink. He doesn’t just like the title, he likes everything that comes along with it.

He likes that he has to take care of you, in and outside if the bedroom, being a daddy is a 24/7 job, he has to be considerate to you and grateful for all the trust and love you give him.

He also really likes pinning you down. Whether it be during play wrestling or during sex, it makes him feel strong, and it drives you crazy, absolutely feral for him.

L=Location (Favorite places to do the do)

Yeah you’ve had your share of sneaking off to do it during events but his favorite place to do it would be in the privacy of his own home, preferably his bed so that your dog won’t walk in on you.

M = Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going)

If you simply say, “Screw me.” That would probably be more than enough to turn him on and fulfil your request.

But what grinds his gears is seeing you in tight clothing, or the kind of clothes that would show off your assets. If you’re a good mom to dodger, if you show an interest in the things he likes or do anything that would make his heart flutter and make him fall more in love with you.

N= NO (Something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

He would never have proper public sex because that would probably interfere with his public image and work. Other than that he’s pretty open to most things.

He also wouldn’t like to invite anyone else to your bedroom or to share you. It is a nice fantasy for him but way too risky.

O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

He likes both giving and receiving equally. He likes having you on your back where he can see your face while he explores your intimate walls with his tongue, but he also likes to have you ride his face. You were apprehensive to at first, but with some convincing you agreed.

Sixtynine is another one of his favorites. He never actually had to ask for it. You were sitting on his face, holding onto his stomach and screaming when you felt your orgasm approaching, he pushed your head just a little, you got the hint, and started working on his cock, which was painfully hard.

P = Pace (Are they fast and rough? Slow and sensual? Etc.)

It would usually depend on what kinda day it is and how you’re both feeling. But most of the time he is usually slow but at the same time rough. Where his thrusts are drawn out but also impactful.

Q= Quickie (Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.)

Chris loves quickies. Bending you over the kitchen counter, a quick session in the afternoon on the couch when things got a little too heated while cuddling, in his trailor while he’s on a break, in the shower where he can make you dirty before cleaning you up. You made it.

But he wouldn’t prefer them over proper sex ever. Usually he likes to take his time with you.

R = Risk (Are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc)

He’s game to experiment to a certain extent. Even if he’s skeptical about something he’d keep an open mind and give it a shot for you.

S= Stamina (How many rounds can they go for, how long do they last)

He’s a fit and motivated man so he can last for a long time and go for many rounds. It’s more likely for you to be tired and tapped out than for him.

If it was a long day on set, and if he’s a little exhausted then he may not be able to go more than once. But will make up for it when he can.

T = Toy (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?)

You both own a variety of butt plugs and vibrators, silky ties, blindfolds, handcuffs that Chris likes to use on you. You even bought a ball gag asking him to put it on you, which was the only time you ever used it because Chris liked to hear your voice and for you to call him daddy or say his name. You couldn’t do it with your mouth full.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

Chris teases you a lot, but he would be a MASSIVE tease if he was a little more patient. He knows the effect he has on you. How you can’t take your eyes off him when he wears a t-shirt that’s a bit too tight and shows off his arms, how you can’t help but grab his butt sometimes and feel him up. When you bite your lip or look away when he catches you staring. If you get caught, be prepared because he will only do it more just to egg you on.

His touches a bit too light, he’d bring you to the edge and leave you just there. But fortunately it won’t last long because usually he’s the one who ends up getting riled up.

V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make)

He’s loud alright. And he isn’t ashamed of it. He would never try to hide how good you make him feel, or miss an opportunity to call you a good girl and praise your gorgeous body. There will be lots of grunting and groaning and moaning and you revel in every second of it.

X = X-Ray (Let s see what’s going on in those pants, picture or words)

He’s pretty big. Much bigger than average. He looked pretty average when he wasn’t hard, you let that fool you into thinking you could take him pretty easily, he wasn’t that much bigger than anyone else you’d had sex with right?

Your eyes almost popped out of your head when you saw him hard, his dick hard and thick and a blush pink, two thick running on the sides of it.

He assured you that he would make it fit and that you had nothing to be worried about.

Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?)

It’s pretty high. Higher than most people at least. You call him your horndog, but like in a nice way, because he always wants it. Even if you spent an entire night screaming his name and being used and stretched in ways that made your pussy as well as your body sore, he would still ask for more the very next morning. He’d respect you if you say no and back off immediately but he’s up for it whenever you want.

ZZZ (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

If he has things on his mind, and if you fall asleep sooner than usual then he’d be up a while. But most of the times he falls asleep quickly after.

#chris evans x reader #chris evans alphabet #chris evans x you #chris evans x y/n #steve rogers x reader #chris evans headcanons

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