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#just gotta switch every 30 minutes
steddieas-shegoes · 4 months
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7:28
this post by @footburn inspired me in that 'you must type this out before you can do anything else' way so here. this was literally from brain to computer in about 20 minutes.
rated m this is literally just the softest and sweetest fluff, with some implied sexual content discussed
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"Eds."
"Hm?"
Eddie's sleepy voice whispered against Steve's ear, his breath sending a shiver down his spine.
Steve turned his head as his hand reached over to cup the back of Eddie's head, his fingers gently gripping the frizzy strands of hair sticking out.
"Gotta get up," Steve mumbled.
The alarm clock would be going off in two minutes, a stark reminder that the real world was just outside of their bedroom and unfortunately required putting on clothes and going to work.
If he could, he'd stay like this all day, every day, for the rest of their lives.
Next to Eddie, on top of Eddie, under Eddie, any way he could possibly have him. As long as the sunlight kept streaming through the window and the warmth of Eddie's soft, sleepy smile was in view, Steve would be happy.
"Mm-mm," Eddie shook his head once, nuzzling closer so his next exhale made Steve's eyes flutter closed.
"I have to open today."
Eddie's hand settled on his shoulder, squeezing once before falling away again.
"Stupid."
"What is, baby?" Steve smirked as he watched Eddie's brows furrow as he finally started to wake up.
"Work."
Eddie's eyes fluttered open.
The alarm clock switched to 7:29.
"Call out," Eddie's eyes blinked slowly.
"I can't. It's just me today. Robs would kill me."
"But it'll kill me to watch you get out of bed," Eddie pouted.
Steve sat up, leaning on his elbow, and looked down at Eddie.
Eddie looked back up at him with those wide eyes, bottom lip out like it would actually convince Steve to stay.
The alarm clock showed 7:30.
Steve reached over to shut off the alarm as soon as it started beeping.
He leaned down to kiss his head, then his heart tattoo, then the scar on his side.
"Pleeeease?" Eddie whined. "I have today off. We could sleep and not sleep."
Steve rolled his eyes, but couldn't help but want to give in.
They had so few days like this: where one of them didn't wake up screaming or crying from a nightmare, where they weren't in pain the moment their eyes opened, where someone wasn't needing them the moment the sun rose.
It was tempting to take advantage of this moment, of this day, see where it would lead if Steve just settled back down in bed, see if they were able to sleep for another couple of hours.
Maybe wake up with lips against skin, or hands against chests or thighs.
Maybe eat breakfast in bed and make more than one type of mess.
Maybe only get up to take a shower together, scrub off the stickiness of syrup and body fluids.
Or maybe they'd get a call in 15 minutes from Dustin, who should know better than to call before ten in the morning on weekends, but does anyway because he won't admit that he misses them.
Maybe Robin would show up to shove Steve out the door for the shift he's supposed to work, pissed that he'd even try to get out of it.
Maybe Wayne would finally remember to bring that cake recipe he found in an old family cookbook and insist on helping him make it since he knows the secret.
Or maybe Steve would kiss Eddie's lips once before getting up and doing the thing he doesn't want to do today so they can enjoy their peace tomorrow.
Maybe Steve can look at the alarm clock that now reads 7:31 and think about how sometimes love is getting out of a cozy bed and going to work so you have money to pay for those concert tickets that are gonna be the best birthday present he's ever gotten.
"Love you so much, Eds," Steve whispers as he pulls away from Eddie's mouth, already longing for another kiss.
"Love you too, sweetheart. Bring ya lunch?" Eddie's eyes were getting heavy again as he turned his head into the sheets, breathing in the scent of Steve, of them.
"See you then."
At 7:32, Steve managed to go into the bathroom to shower and get ready for his day.
At 7:56, Steve kissed Eddie's forehead as he slept, careful not to wake him.
At 8:02, Steve left a note for Eddie on his way out the door, the same note he wrote for him every morning, left on his favorite mug so he wouldn't miss it when he made his coffee.
Love you, miss you, want you - your Stevie
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st4rb3rries · 8 months
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OMG I LOVED UR STAN AND KYLE BSF HEADCANNONS!! Can i req one with the main four, like what its like to be in a group w/ them?? have an amazing day <33
BEING IN A FRIEND GROUP WITH SOUTH PARKS MAIN 4
pairings; stan, kyle, kenny, cartman x fem!reader (all aged up 18+)
summary; chaotic friend group hc's!
warnings; cussing
a/n; hi and ty hope you have an amazing day too!!
key colors; blue= stan green= kyle orange= kenny red= cartman pink= reader
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late night skate boarding with them. it's always cartman who texts you guys to go. in reality he only wants to go to just to start shit. in my opinion kenny is the best skater out of y'all. but cartman is the worst💀. "you guys you guys look im gonna go down the ramp!!" "cartman that isn't a good idea your not ready-" "WAAAAAHHHHH" laughter is coming out from you, stan, and kenny. kyle wants to laugh but he ain't risking it😭. "GAWDAMMIT KYLE IM BEAT YOUR J-" cartman stops himself because he knows damn well not to rip on kyle in front of you. so he switches up real fast 🙄. "you guys i seriously think i broke a bone" "whatever cartman you just switched up cause you know y/n would kick your ass" 5 minutes kenny is teaching you, stan, and kyle a trick. "ok so next you gotta-" "get a room lovebirds i mean come on🙄" "CARTMAN STFU!!" "yeah dude stay mad because your not psychically able to do any of this🥱" this all happens in less than 15 minutes, like why can't y'all just be a nice friend group😭. moments later stan was about to go off a ramp. UNTIL HIS WHEELS BROKE OFF THE SKATEBOARD. i wonder who unscrewed them..... "AAAUAGHHHHHH" "DON'T WORRY STAN I GOTCHU!!" and there he was, stanly marsh in your arms. "W rizz stan or nah😏" stan could feel his face heating up fr. "damn dude that should've been me not stan😔" "kenny shut the hell up💀" "wait a minute where's cartman he literally almost killed stan tf????" cartman isn't trying to get his ass kicked in front of people so he ditched and went home. classic cartman.
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karaoke night. you guys are definitely singing 2000's songs. but it always seems like you guys get interrupted no matter what. karaoke night was started by cartman, which is so surprising?? "I WANNA HOLD'EM LIKE THEY DO IN TEXAS, PLEASE" "FOLD'EM LET'EM HIT ME RAISE IT BABY STAY WITH M-" stan and kyle always hating cause you and cartman sound a little too good. "BOOO GET OFF THE STAGE" "YA MY EARS ARE BLEEDING" "OH FUCK OFF GUYS LET US SING" "you guys have been singing this same song for 2 hours bruh😭" "2 minutes kenny get it right" they just hating cause they can't handle real talent. sometimes when the karaoke gets intense you guys act like judges for americas got talent💀. "is this kenny mccormick from south park colorado?" "yes" "and what will you be doing today?" "YOUR MOM AHAHA" "disqualified poor people can't seem to have talent" "CARTMAN WTF" "NEXT" "no wait i'll sing with him" "oh god" if kyle and stan think you and cartman sound a little too good. JUST WAIT UNTIL THEY HERE YOU AND KENNY. "THIS ONE IS FOR THE BOYS WITH THE BOOMIN SYSTEM" "TOP DOWN AC WITH THE COOLER SYSTEM" super bass by nicki minaj is y'alls go to song. every time you guys finish that song your out of breath and laugh so much😭. "AND THE CROWD GUYS MILD🔥" "NEXT" "cartman we are done playing americas got talent" "dude let me and kyle sing next we haven't sung at all🥹" "fine" "ah hell nah it better not be anything emo💀" *30 seconds later every one starts singing* "BUT IM A CREEP" "IM A WERIDO" "WHAT THE HELL AM I DOIN' HERE" "I DON'T BELONG HERE" suddenly the tv, microphones, and speaker goes out?? "LISTEN UP BITCHES IM NOT HAVING AN ALCOHOLIC, A JEW, A FATHERLESS DAUGHTER, AND A HOMELESS POOR BOY SING RADIOHEAD AT MY HOUSE‼️‼️" guess who got jumped that night🤔???
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moony-ghoul · 4 months
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ghouls go to breakfast hcs:
dew: dew gets nauseous if he eats too early in the morning so he usually will just have coffee while the others eat, despite this he always helps first thing in the morning when it comes to making breakfast, swiss cuts him up some fruit after they clean up and he’ll snack on that before lunch. he has his coffee w oat milk and pretends like he doesn’t want any sugar but will scoop about 4 tablespoons in after the first sip
rain: he’s not the biggest fan of ‘traditional’ breakfast foods, he loves bibimbap, rice w a shit ton of lil side plates to add in? he goes crazy. however rain loves a good sleep in and doesn’t like having to wait for the rice to cook AND cut up veggies AND fry eggs, luckily there’s a lil fire ghoul who’s love language is acts of service who will make sure all of rains side plates are ready for him the moment he wakes up. after breakfast he likes to sit outside w his herbal tea and a good book, he’s not 100% sure what the tea is but mount said it’s good for digestion
phantom: complete opposite of dew. this mf needs food in their mouth as soon as they open their eyes or they will die (they won’t). thankfully much like rain has dew, ant has swiss who wakes up at a ridiculous time and makes sure his lil bat has a 3 course meal to wake up to. ant eats a lot and they eat fast, they’ll have something that resembles a full english breakfast and a bowl of cereal and fruit and whatever left overs the others don’t want. nobody knows how that ghoul can possibly fit so much food in them and absolutely no one is shocked when they’re curled on the couch 30 minutes later complaining about a stomach ache before having their post breakfast nap
swiss: swiss is easy when it comes to breakfast, he’s typically cooking most of everyone else’s so he makes a plate w a lil bit of everyone else’s food. he will have at least three different kinds of eggs tho usually one fried, one scrambled and an omelet (“gotta have protein for the gainz”). he switches up between tea and coffee depending on his mood but he always drinks it straight no milk no sweetener “i’m sweet enough”
mount: mount much like dew and swiss is one of the dens chefs. he doesn’t touch any of the meat tho the texture causes him problems so that’s left to dew and swiss, mount is a master at omelettes tho he has a secret cheese dealer and always has the most amazing cheese that compliment the rest of the omelet perfectly, along w his home grown veggies and herbs. the abbey does have a few chickens that mount will help care for but that’s mostly up to zeph. every morning he starts off w one of his homemade teas he’s got a cupboard full of different mixes of herbs that he’ll switch between depending on what the day has in store
cumulus: forever mounts princess cumulus tends to wake up to a beautiful steaming mug of chamomile tea in bed, she enjoys it while she spends time freshening herself up for the day (washing her face, taking off her silk cap and fixing her hair up). by the time she wanders into the kitchen mount always has her fav of his omelettes ready, ricotta and spinach with a side of sliced up strawberries. he quite literally has it ready on a silver platter for her
cirrus: cirrus is basically half alive in the morning until she has at least 2 mugs of close to boiling black coffee. she goes absolutely ham on the sausages, heat does not effect her so she’ll grab them straight out of the pan while swiss is still cooking them, if they’re still raw in the middle she honestly prefers it. she might snack on some pineapple if she’s feeling peckish but for the most part her mornings start off w a plate full of pork (bacon and sausage)
aurora: if you wake up aurora before she’s done having her beauty sleep all hell will break loose. she’s usually the last one up and is also one of swiss’ morning princesses. she sits at the head of the table every morning and swiss brings her a bowl of yogurt, granola (ofc made by mount) and berries. he would not dare forget to serve it with a kiss
this post is inspired by this one from @iamthecomet
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moonstruck-poet · 4 months
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His Brave Girl
Pairing - Tom Hiddleston x reader!
Summary - You are a NCA Investigator and have an ongoing case to rescue women and children that have been kept captive. The mission of course isn't as easy and can also prove to be life threatening. But with an incredibly supportive husband and a strong team, it doesn't seem all that impossible.
Warnings - blood, fighting, curse words, assault and harassment, mentions of death.
This was a light introduction to the story, things will surely get interesting soon. Hope you like it <33
The elevator dinged as the doors opened and you heaved a sigh before getting in and leaning your back against the wall, eyes closing briefly due to exhaustion.
"Does this thing get slower every day?" You muttered to yourself after getting off and pulled out the keys from your pocket while also holding the stack of papers in one hand.
You walked inside, placing the key in its usual place and dumping the sheets on the dining table with a loud thump.
"A new case then I take it?" Tom entered the living room, a small smile on his face on seeing you as he walked closer.
"Yeah," you couldn't help but smile yourself upon seeing his homely appearance. "Missed you today, love".
"Ditto darling," he whispered and wrapped his arms around you, pulling you close against his chest and breathing out heavily. "God was it tiring today," his face turned down a fraction before you kissed that frown off, making his lips twitch.
"It's okay," you murmured in his ear and played with the strands of hair on his neck, "I'm so proud of you".
He merely tightened his hold, glad that you had understood him so easily. No wonder he had known you were the one from the minute your relationship bloomed.
"Is it okay if we go out for dinner? I wanna take a walk with you," he pulled back, hands still on your waist as he stared into your eyes.
"Of course, Tom. Let me just get freshened up and we'll leave immediately," you kissed his cheek to quickly go and wash.
After a quick but soothing warm shower, you decided to wear a simple pair of black skinny jeans and a beige button down. Tying your hair in a ponytail and putting your phone in your back pocket you were ready to leave.
"Let's go then," you switched off the lights, him smiling appreciatively at your simple outfit as you two walked out, locking the door and then entwining your hands.
"Why didn't you put on a jacket? It's cold," he said the minute you stepped out in the dark.
"It's fine, Tom," you replied and he took your tangled fingers, placing them in the front pocket of his coat making you laugh. "So what's the current mood? Chinese or Indian?"
"Indian," the two of you said simultaneously and grinned at each other.
"I think you're starting to rub off on me," he chuckled and squeezed your hand. "My spice tolerance is quite high now".
"That's a pro of marrying an Asian, and especially an Indian, my dear," you said happily, swinging your hands like a child.
You entered the cozy Indian restaurant and ordered some starters, wanting a quick bite before moving on to the main course.
"What's the recent case about then, love?" He questioned, adding quite an amount of the spicy green chutney to his dish making you smirk.
"Oh recently we got the news that about 30 females, both girls and women have been abducted right from the streets, probably for slavery. So we gotta track those motherfuckers and play tit for tat," you said and he noticed your jaw clench with anger.
While Tom's heart sank. He was used to hearing such cases every other day, especially since his own wife was a crime investigator but it hurt him every damn time.
"Don't worry," you took his hand in your own, rubbing circles on the back. "We're gonna rescue them, every single one of them".
"I know you will. But still it just hurts, to know that every three days, somewhere in this country a woman dies, all because of violence. How do people even think of committing such sins, such atrocities?! The humanity is dying and it feels like nobody even cares anymore".
You pressed your lips together sympathetically, agreeing with every statement of his and just being so glad that you had such a passionate husband.
"I'm gonna do my best, we're gonna catch all of them and make them suffer," you said firmly and he nodded.
"I'm there with you through every step of the way," he said softly making you simply stare at his beautiful face before smiling widely.
The rest of the dinner was quite peaceful, with only small talks made here and there as you both actually enjoyed the silence.
"Ice cream?" He asked immediately once you stepped out of the restaurant.
"Sure," you laughed at his excited face and wrapped an arm around his torso and him swiftly pulling you close by the shoulders and pressing a kiss on your head.
You two were chatting, about his work, about your work. The past week had been quite busy. What with you attending meetings about the recent case and him shooting endlessly for the Night Manager.
"I really can't wait to see you all decked up in a suit on the big screen," you grinned, all giddy inside while he let out a noise of surprise.
"But you've seen me in a suit numerous times, that too right in front of your own eyes," he raised an eyebrow.
"You don't know the magic you show on the screen, Hiddleston. It makes me go insane," you said, turning a little red making him chuckle as he too blushed.
A sudden shout interrupted his next comment and you two stopped, frowning at each other before finding the source.
"Oh shit," you muttered and his eyes widened at the scene in front of him. There was a man, forcing his way on a young lady who looked no more than 20 years of age.
"Come on sweetheart," the creep said, a sinister smirk on his face as he pressed his forehead against her's, making her thrash uncomfortably.
A furious rage built up inside of you as you saw random citizens watching the scene with interest and not bothering to move a muscle.
And immediately your footsteps quickened as you almost sprinted forwards with Tom hit on your heels.
"Hold this," you pressed your phone into his hand and before he could utter another word, you had pulled your sleeves to your elbows and ripped the man off of the girl.
"Get away from her, asshole," you said, your voice deep and cold and your husband felt himself freeze upon seeing you in action.
"Uh yeah? And who the fuck are you to tell me to get off?" He said coyly. "You're a fiesty one, yeah? I like those type," he said and stepped closer daringly.
Tom had never before felt such violence inside him but he held himself, knowing you had the situation under control. You wouldn't want him to get in trouble, whereas you, you had legal permission.
"And I like catching people like you," you retorted, smirking and within a few seconds you had pinned him on the ground, your knee pressed to his chest as you lounged on him casually.
"You done now? Cuz me and my husband would really like to get some ice cream," your eyes narrowed and he groaned when you pressed down hard.
"You okay?" Tom went to the terrified young lady while also maintaining a respectful distance, knowing she must be scared.
She couldn't fathom anything and was shaking violently while he watched helplessly, not wanting to cross any boundaries at all.
So he resorted to words, "You're safe now, don't worry at all. My wife-" he gestured towards you, halting midway after noticing the criminal's awfully bleeding nose and your deathly expression and grimacing slightly.
"Um are you alright? Did he hurt you anywhere?" He asked again gently once she had calmed down.
"N- No he didn't," she shook her head and fixed her rumpled clothing. "You- You were just in time, thank you so much".
"Hey no, there's nothing to thank about," he smiled and they noticed a police car coming closer.
"There comes your ride," you said and pulled the grunting man to his feet. Your face shining with sweat and slight blood coating your right cheek.
"Goodness love," Tom muttered, wincing at his terrible state but looking hella proud at the same time.
"Aaron," you greeted your friend cheerfully, "A new parcel for you mate. You're welcome," you added when he raised his eyebrows at the assaulter's bloody face.
"Let's get going then, bastard," Aaron gripped him tighter and offered you a full salute and you nodded.
"One last thing," you said and stepped back making the others stare warily except for the officer who didn't bat an eye as you delivered a perfect side kick, breaking the man's jaw.
Aaron laughed as he turned towards Tom who had adorned an expression of shock, "Be careful there, I wouldn't want to get on her bad side. This one can really pack a kick".
"Wouldn't dream of it," your husband chuckled lightly making you roll your eyes as the man was dragged inside the car and off they went.
You finally turned to look at the still shivering but composed girl, "You okay darling?"
She didn't say anything and fell into your arms, her being considerably shorter compared to your rather tall figure. "T- Thank you," tears flowed down her cheeks. "I was so sure I was going to die right there".
"Hey," you said and rubbed her back with your left hand that was not stained with blood. "You're safe now though aren't you? That's all that matters".
She backed off, still sobbing and wiped her tears, looking at you with such gratitude that you yourself could feel your throat burning.
"Do you live close by?" You asked and when she nodded you offered to drive her home, knowing her mental state was sensitive.
"Here's my official card, I'm a NCA Investigator so you're safe with me," she nodded and you were glad to do so, wanting her to feel as secure as possible.
"Come on," Tom guided her softly and opened the back door as she got in and he seated himself in the passenger seat.
It took about five minutes to reach her home and you parked the car in the driveway, both of you getting away and stopping after noticing that Sofia hadn't even opened her door.
"Hey," he knocked on her window and she jumped, snapping out of her thoughts and got off upon noticing that she was home.
He went ahead and ringed the bell and was greeted by a warm middle aged woman who smiled but her expression soon turned shaky after taking in the state of her daughter and she shouted for her husband.
"Oh my darling," the father gasped and took his girl in his arms and she started crying again, emotions flowing out uncontrollably.
The two of you watched in silence, your hearts breaking at the exchange and praying to god for keeping everyone suffering through such horrible experiences safe.
"How can we ever thank you," the old lady walked towards you and took your hand in hers, silent tears running down her cheeks. "You saved my daughter's life. How can I possibly repay-"
"No no don't say such things," Tom interrupted her, embracing the woman and you noticed tears staining his face too making your heart clench.
"But really, thank you, both of you," Sofia's father said and pulled Tom in a hug and shook your hand.
"She's safe, and that's all that matters," you said softly before handing them a card. "This is a helpline number that works 24/7, just give a missed call whenever you feel threatened, though god forbid something would happen again".
The woman stepped closer to you and cupped your cheeks motherly making you stutter, "And you, take care of yourself, look after you wife," she adressed Tom who nodded with a smile. "You're out there putting your life in danger for the sake of others, but be mindful of your own too".
"Y- Yeah, I will," you swallowed the emotions and gave them a professional salute and a low bow before taking their leave.
The walk to the car and then the drive home was passed in complete silence, both understanding that it was a need.
Tom only switched on the dim, yellow lights, bathing the room in a warm glow before turning to look at you properly.
"Love?" He asked softly, standing in front of you and placing his palm on your cheek. "You're okay, aren't you?" His eyes scanned yours, eyebrows drawing in closer in worry.
"Yes, I'm okay. I deal with this pretty much everyday, you know".
"You've hurt yourself," he looked at your badly bruised knuckles as he examined them.
"I handle such things everyday too".
"But that doesn't mean it hurts less," he said simply and you nodded. "Carrying a certain weight every single day does not mean that it's not heavy".
"You're right".
"Oh c'mere," he opened his arms amd you fell into them gratefully, inhaling his familiar scent and trying to take to focus your mind. "You said to me earlier that you were proud of me. But honestly, my work doesn't even come close to yours. It's me who's really damn proud to call this wonderful, strong and brave woman; my wife".
"Yeah?" You looked at him with glistening eyes, pressing your lips together.
"Yes. Not everybody can even fathom the work you're doing. I'm your husband for God's sake amd know all about what you do. And yet you saw it for yourself how terrified I was in that situation".
"You are amazing, the most brilliant woman I've met and goodness am I so, so proud of you, my love," he touched his lips to your forehead tenderly. "I already love you more than anything, but somehow you made me fall even harder".
"I love you too," you whispered and buried yourself right in his embrace.
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Taglist :-
@thedesibitch
@herdetectivetheorist
@chronicallybubbly
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randomfoggytiger · 5 months
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"Doesn't Make Him Less of a Miracle"
(Fictober, Day 30)
Fictober's almost over, and I haven't tackled the very genre that lured me into fic in the first place: S9 AU.
*****
William took after his father in many ways: he was very bright, unnaturally articulate for his age, and immaculately opportunistic: a born-and-raised schemer (though said schemes were often undercut by his innate inability to lie believably-- which Mulder ribbed Scully about, mercilessly.) He was also an incredibly fast runner with a propensity to dive head-first into the nearest kerfuffle. 
And Fox Mulder, the intelligent progenitor of this intelligent child, exploited that propensity to its fullest whenever he needed a few hours of unbroken concentration. Thus, Skippy’s Bouncy Castle and Ball Pit Stadium became the local haunt for the Mulder-Scully family’s operations. 
Alternating his afternoons between sifting through poached documents and worming his way into various mummy or nanny groups, Mulder learned just as much about thumb sucking habits as he did the ever-changing factions and movements of the crumbled Consortium empire. It wasn't a leap to apply his hostage negotiation tactics to toddler tantrum mitigation; and, to his surprise, he seemed more popular outside of the Bureau than in it, constantly getting interrupted by a child or their guardian with yet another situation that needed diffusing.
But like all aspects in life, there were prices to be paid for peace; and little William Mulder-Scully chose closing time on an already hectic Monday to exact that price.
*****
“Willaaaaaaaaaaaaay!” Mulder dropped his hands out of their airhorn position, pivoting to watch, helplessly, as hordes of well-behaved, snot-nosed, and spit-curled children of all ages wobbled out after their parents. The very picture of the Rockwell American dream. Staff members were whipping out mops or picking up stray toys-- one particularly under-tipped teenager glowered at him from her post near the light switch-- and still William did not appear from the midst of the ball pit. 
For a split second the old fear rushed irrationally back, cold sweat breaking out on his neck, "Fox!" clamoring in his mind-- but Will’s sudden outburst of giggles grounded him in reality, shook him involuntarily with relief. Deal with it another day.  Annoyance at his unexpected fear-- and annoyed he was annoyed-- spurred Mulder into action.
"Will, outta the ball pit-- we gotta go pick up food.” ‘Pick up food’: the universal unspoken for quick-and-easy greasy garbage from the nearest burger joint. Another thing father and son had in common.  
His precious miracle cackled. “Daddy, I’m a sea monster. You have to come hunt me.” 
“Sir--”
Mulder jolted at the sudden, vicious tug on his sleeve. Light switch teenager, frosted lips curling even further downward, had somehow learned teleportation and wasted that ability by scaring the daylights out of him. “The ball pit's closed. Grab your kid and go.” 
The ghosts of each and every one of Scully’s long-suffering eyerolls flashed through his mind; and he counted them, likely by tens, in an attempt to remain calm. Losing his cool exterior while hopped up on too many cups of coffee would only damage any potential future discount-- not to mention the years of ammunition Scully would have on him as their son inched slowly towards the plague of puberty.
“Yeah, just a minute, my--”
Losing interest in Light Switch Girl, Mulder covered the last few feet in a light jog, skidding across a wet patch on the floor but recovering his footing with a couple of hairy maneuvers.
Red ball, green ball, blue ball, green, green, blue, purple? Red, blue-- 
Red hair. The sea monster was just submerging on the other end of the pool, upgrading his chortles to belly laughter. 
“William, we can play the sea monster game tomorrow, but we’ve got to leave now.” Mulder was pleased to note that his son’s head paused, recognizing that ‘William’ and ‘got to’ were a big deal compared to ‘Will’ and ‘gotta’. The head bobbed up and down, wavering between losing the battle with honor or fighting the war with outright rebellion. 
Since logic seemed to be winning over wheedling-- a trait Scully would rib him over, mercilessly-- Mulder doubled down. “C’mon, Buddy, the workers have to clean up and go home. They want to eat, spend time with their families. …Watch a movie.” Well, a little wheedling wouldn't hurt.
The sea monster was drifting closer, his thoughtful Scully scowl and blue eyes rising above three green balls perfectly resembling algae-speckled rocks. What are the odds. “Is it… dirty in here, too?” 
YES. “Yeah, Will, it’s pretty gross in there. Probably has a few cooties, too.” 
His son may have had the genes of a scientist, but he hadn’t quite figured out the finer points of germ pathology. William breeched, fast, which gave his dad scant seconds of catch time before nearly faceplanting on the floor. “Cooties!” he chanted while wildly flinging his arms about, forcing Mulder the Triumphant to dodge a few accidental nose wallops.
Cooties really did come in handy. 
“Sir--”
Great. Light Switch Girl was back. 
“--your laptop and bag were moved to the front desk. If you could please grab them, we need to finish closing up.” She crossed her arms, sneered at his wiggling son, and began to brusquely tap her foot. 
In moments like these, Mulder wondered why he bothered trying to save the planet.  
“Thanks.” Readjusting Will-- who was attempting to climb, face first, down his back-- and offering an equally charming lip twitch of his own, Mulder skidded his retreat across the room, sorted and collected his things-- with the hand not currently grabbing his four-year old’s ankle-- and hoisted all of his belongings-- sea monster included-- over both shoulders before making his grunting exit. 
“Willy, I think you’re getting too big to be able to lug around anymore. Soon you'll have to help drag me back to the car.” 
Sea monsters and cooties forgotten, William puzzled this new idea while getting situated in his car seat. Mulder let him pursue it in silence-- another neat wrangling trick-- as he buckled, unbuckled, and rebuckled straps; then, since the gears were still turning in his son's head, he slid the bag onto the floor and slid himself into the front seat. The driver's safety belt was clicked into place when Will jerked upward, waving his hands and beaming at his father in the rearview mirror.
“It’s not me, it's the laptop! It becomes heavier every time you save another part of the world!” 
Mulder chuffed a laugh, enamored with the flawless logic of the young and uneducated. “You’re too smart for your old man,” he assured, proudly. 
“Can we get chicken?”
Just like that-- subject over and burgers out the window. “Sure, buddy. My treat.” 
*****
Fighting Colonization, catching sea monsters, and hunting down KFC may not, exactly, be a day in the life of the average American family; but it certainly enabled him to strum up an interesting moral out of the Flukeman and its excitement to go home. On second thought, Will would probably be incentivized to try hitchhiking to the ocean himself.
Now there's something Scully and I can't take credit for: possible obsessions with sewer tanks.
Somehow, Mulder didn't think she'd like that, either.
*****
Thank you for reading~
Enjoy!
Tagging @today-in-fic and @xffictober2023 and @fictober-event
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symphonicmetal101 · 2 years
Text
OM CAST MORNING ROUTINE
Sans MC
Lucifer
Most of the time he wakes up at his desk, groaning as he stretches his aching muscles. His internal clock wakes him up, as well as his discomfort. He pulls himself together enough as he rubs his face and starts to unbutton his shirt as he makes his way to the washroom. Every morning, without fail, one side of his face and hair is completely flat from being pressed against the desk, and every morning, without fail, he hates it, so he just keeps walking past his mirror. Lucifer is a man of efficiency, so yes, he brushes his teeth in the shower. He starts it off hot to release a minute amount of tension in his back and shoulders and wash his hair, before switching it to icy cold to both wake him up, and leave enough warm water for his brothers. So his showers take 10-15 minutes because yeah, he could be faster, but its a place of relaxation and rejuvenation for him while also being considerate. He's normally down in the kitchen by around 5:30, in time to see Beel filling his water bottle for his morning run. He brews himself some coffee, then goes back to his room to finish off any work he didnt get to and organize his work he has to do for the rest of the day. When his coffee is empty, he heads back downstairs and knocks on the doors of those most guilty of oversleeping before making sure whoever is responsible for breakfast is handling it alright, and making himself more coffee to tackle the breakfast table discourse.
Mammon
Def has an alarm clock that says something like "Gotta get that Grimm!!" With a pop out Mammon with a top hat and a cane and a couple grimm flying out in a very cartoony announcer voice. Idk I dont make the rules, my brain was adamant on this though lmao. Almost like a cuckoo clock but in alarm clock form, but the voice gets mire and more disturbing every time you hit snooze. Mammon scares himself awake by hitting snooze five times to bolt out of bed and reset the clock so he can get up for the day. He heads to the bathroom and checks himself out in the mirror, especially his teeth/smile. He uses mouthwash first, and gets ready for his shower. By the time he's awake, most of the hot water has been used up, so he gets about .5 seconds of warm water, and then the house hears him yelp as the cold water comes on. Hes a little grumbly about it, and goes to sit on his bed on his phone for an unprecedented amount of time until Lucifer knocks on the door and he gets his butt back in gear. He's quick to then throw together and put on his outfit, spray a tasteful amount of cologne on, take a mirror selfie and head down for breakfast. He doesn't normally have much of an appetite in the morning, so if hes not hungry for the breakfast provided, he gives it to Beel and grabs a granola bar and an orange. After eating he rushes back to his room to properly brush his teeth, double check he has his wallet and phone, and then head out.
Levi
Levi usually stays up to ungodly hours playing video games, so when Beel wakes up for his 3am fridge raid he knocks on Levis door as a signal for him TO GO THE FUCK TO SLEEP. Levi's "morning" doesn't usually start til 12-2 in the afternoon, but he has to wake up at some point in between bc family breakfast is mandatory. But once he wakes up the second time its perfect because the house is usually empty, so its quiet and he can use ALL the hot water for himself. After his bath/shower he logs on to the games on his phone to do the daily tasks before settling down and doing his school work.
Satan
Satan usually falls asleep sitting up or reclined with a book on his face or chest, so sometimes he wakes up purely from discomfort. Other times its from a tamagotchi-like device that doubles as his alarm clock. He wakes up the first time it goes off, because he's eager to see the egg hatch/a pixelated kitten come out of a basket on his screen. He showers at night before reading, so he just gets up, checks himself out in the mirror, vrushing his teeth, and tries a couple poses with his jacket....he only stops when he senses Lucifer walking in the hallway, so goes to open his door just as Lucifer is about to walk by to try and get him to walk into it. Once the little squabble is settled, Satan turns back into his room to relax a bit before family breakfast. He takes care of his tamagotchi before hiding it in his jacket and heading downstairs. Satan believes breakfast is vital, so he always eats what he can and tries to be one of the first out of the house so he can find a few precious moments more for his digital pet.
Asmodeus
Hes the only one who showers twice, once in the morning, once in the evening. Asmodeus is a fucking disney princess...kind of, the birds outside his window wake him up and he chucks his actual alarm clock at the window bc they woke him up 2 minutes before the alarm. Hes a bit of a hot mess as he wakes up, but nothing a few masks, a hot shower, proper hair care, make up, a cute outfit and some confidence cant fix- because Asmo normally goes to bed early (around 10:30) (on nights hes not partying or smthn) he wakes up around 6:30 to get the ball rolling. He likes to make really foamy smiles as he brushes his teeth, being a little goofy in the morning feels healing. He checks his face for any visible lines or wrinkles, before uttering a positive affirmation about himself to the mirror and flashing another smile. He gets all undressed and has a shower- all his products match in scent and have very specific roles to play. Once out of the shower he stays in his towel on his head and his robe as he carefully plans his outfit and accessories, and then sits down to do his makeup at his vanity. He hums a lot, and sometimes has quiet classical music playing, though its always more cheerful than what Lucifer listens to. Asmo is all dressed and ready by the time Lucifer is walking by, so before Lucifer can knock, Asmo opens the door and begs him to take a picture of him in his outfit, which he normally gets upon giving the deadly puppy dog eyes so early in the morning. Asmo messes around on Devilgram until its time for breakfast, which he often makes himself because he caters it towards whatever diet he's trying, but its always a warm food. He cant stand a cold breakfast food. He'll often head out early to pick up a drink from Starbucks/the equivalent before heading to school.
Beel
If it werent for Belphies magic, Beel would always be tired bc of how much he wakes up at night and how early he gets up in the morning. He gets up around 5:00 to really just brush his teeth and throw some clean work out clothes on, and maybe do a few stretches. He also writes out any plans he has for fangol so he doesn't forget the approach he wants to take later. He has a towel and two water bottles he takes, on for water and one for a protein shake. He enjoys the quiet and the casual small talk he can make with his biggest brother while he gets ready to head out. He has a strict workout regiment he sticks to everyday, and comes back to the house around 7:30. He has enough time for a quick cold shower, then to make it back downstairs in time for breakfast. He won't leave for school unless he has a partner, be it Belphie or otherwise.
Belphie
Morning? Routine? This guy?!??!?! No, time is an illusion and morning is a dreaded time when hes physically dragged out of bed.
Diavolo
Oh he fucking hates waking up. Barb is his alarm clock though, so he begrudgingly gets out of bed on the fourth attempt to get him up. He rubs his fave to wake up enough to brush his teeth before taking a hot fucking shower that would boil anyone else alive. His clothes are set on the bed for him, but he tries to get away with as much sitting around in his towel as he can. Breakfast is sitting at a way too empty table and reading latest reports from nobles and Mephistopheles newsletter. Diavolo has a filling breakfast, because often times he forgets to eat if hes attempting to eat and work. After breakfast he does some planning with Barb.
Barbatos
This man straight up refuses to sleep. When he does, he freezes time to have a solid 16-27 hours of sleep bc goddamn hes exhausted. When he wakes up he takes his precious time, brushing his teeth, having a loooong hot shower, and then staying in his bathrobe and indulging in self care the way Asmodeus taught him. He stays in his bathrobe and face mask while he brews himself some non-caffienated tea. He reads a book as he drinks before getting dressed and doing his hair. He goes to his garden and tends to it a bit before washing his hands and brewing some more green tea and settling down to review Diavolos meetings and schedule.
Mephistopheles
Mephi writes best in the morning, so he's up bright and early around 5 o clock, and has showered, dressed, and brushed his teeth by 5:15. He does some morning stretches and meditation before settling down to write uninterrupted from about 6-7:30. Bc I like to project, he def takes care of his little brother, so at 7:30 on the dot he stops whatever he's doing to go make breakfast for him and his brother, who is just barely waking up and going into the bathroom. Food is on the table by 7:45, which always has a carb, protien, and a fruit. Meph would have coffee, but usually makes a smoothie so both he and his brother can enjoy it. On days his brother is awake early enough, they make the smoothies together. By 8:30 they are out the door so Meph can drop his brother off before going to school himself. (Hc his brother to be 8-10 ish)
Simeon
Similar to Meph, Simeon likes to do grammar and proofreading in the morning, so he's up around 6 to do 15 minutes of yoga before proofreading. Around 7, he does another half hour of yoga before knocking on Luke's door and asking if he wants to join him for a walk. Simeon makes food the night before, so when he comes home he has a cool shower and eats breakfast on the way to school.
Luke
Again, bc I like to project, Luke sets his alarm for 6, so he has time to play in the morning with his stuffies. When Simeon knocks on his door to see if he wants to go for a walk, he usually agrees and quickly gets his clothes on and teeth brushed. He takes showers at night, so as soon as they get home he also grabs one of whatever Simeon made the night before to eat for breakfast. On the way to school he texts Barb good morning, and tells Simeon everything he's looking forward to learning that day.
Raphael
He doesnt sleep well because of PTSD and flashbacks, so he's also awake early, around 4:30 and brushes his teeth. He does language study for an hour and a half, and when he hears Simeon wake up he heads to the courtyard to practice martial arts and sparring. At 7:30 he's back inside, has a QUICK like...2 minute cool shower, polishes his spear and brushes his teeth one more time before heading to the kitchen and meeting Solomon for whatever monstrosity breakfast may be. Thats about all his willing social interaction for the day, and eats on the way to school.
Solomon
He's almost as bad as Lucifer, but wakes up at some point after falling asleep at his desk to go get into bed. He has an alarm set for 6:30, and uses a spell to hide it somewhere in his room. That way when it goes off he has to physically get up and find it to turn it off. He hates it, but its what works best at least on weekdays. Weekends are different xbdjdjd. He has a long hot shower bc hes lonely and gets dressed. He always entertains the idea of stretching/meditating/etc but waves it off bc he can just magic peace of mind and joints that dont creak, right? Admittedly, if he's running late he skips the shower and just magics it ....sometimes he does it for a few weeks bc its just ...convenient. He heads to the kitchen to make breakfast and lunch for him and Raphael. Once Raph leaves Solomon sits by himself at the table and lets the existential dread of being lonely forever wash over him before shaking it off and teleporting to school just in time.
Thirteen
Bdjdbdksos shes the queen of multiple alarms, they are set for 6:30, 6:45, 6:50, 6:55 and it usually gets smashed if it gets to that point. Aka she just hits it repeatedly, she chucks it, she stomps on it, whatever. After huffily getting rid of the shrapnel, she goes straight to the bathroom her lionsmane of bedhead for a shower. I think she eats mints in the shower...like she pops one in her mouth before going in. She has a warm shower and usually only stays in as long as it takes her to wash her hair. Def sings in the shower. When she gets out she changes right away, keeps the towel around her shoulders and has a mini karaoke session with herself, the mirror and her hairbrush as she tames her hair best she can. Headbangs a couple times for that volume, if yknow you know. She puts her death metal playlist on and jams out/air guitars while she waits for her like....pizza pops or somethin to finish in the microwave. She usually has an energy drink with her breakfast, but some of the spirits that chill with her have been trying to push her to try hot chocolate bc they know she likes that too and its a little healthier. She heads out whenever she feels like it headphines blaring. Shes good friends with Madame Scream, and gets a free cookie or cakepop everyday from her on her way to school. Usually shows up early bc shes planning on rigging some sort of trap lmao. I THOUGHT I POSTED THIS????????????
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roo-bastmoon · 1 year
Text
Checklist for Face Day
While you wait around today, please use a QUEUE on YouTube instead of a playlist, as this is the last day of tracking for Set Me Free Pt. 2 and it takes too long for playlists to count. Here's a good one.
Around 8pm EST, you need to start playing Jimin-discography playlists on Spotify to set him up with a high position on their Daily Global Artists chart.
Later tonight, Jimin's interview will appear on Jimmy Fallon, on NBC at 11:35pm EST--approximately 25 minutes before the Like Crazy Music Video Premiere. If you cannot watch it in your region, Our Magic Shop on Discord will be hosting a stream of it under the magic-shop-media thread.
Jimin may also go live on WeVerse before the premiere drops. You're gonna wanna have a few screens around you tonight so you don't miss out.
It is crucial you use another device while all this is going on so you can tune in for a clean stream of the Music Video Premier because those views will be added for the charts and it is extremely unlikely a premiere video will be frozen or deleted.
Cometh the hour, you watch the crap out of the music video--you like, you share, you send it to all your friends and social media accounts and encourage folks to watch it.
Next you're going to want to go to all your pre-sale emails and actually go in and download your purchases. If you do not download your sale, it does not count for the chart.
Then you're going to go into every iTunes and Amazon account you have and you're going to order a digital copy of the FACE album if you haven't already.
One credit card or gift card = 1 account = 1 album purchase. Buy as many as you can afford. There is no faster, cleaner way to chart an artist than to buy their digital album.
Then it's time to actively stream on your premium accounts.
TURN OFF YOUR VPN!
FACE will feature five original songs in this order:
“Face-off”
“Interlude: Dive”
“Like Crazy”
“Alone”
“Set Me Free Pt.2”
In addition, the tracklist will be bolstered by an English-language version of “Like Crazy.”
Stream the whole album but our main job is to prioritize Like Crazy Korean and English versions.
You know the drill. Search manually on YouTube for the first 24 hours. Play it all the way through at 51% volume. Click around on other Jimin or BTS music videos for about a minute. Search again. Play again.
Prioritize both versions of Like Crazy but build in diversity, pause, adjust things, act like a human. You can listen to it 50 times, then you need to switch to another premium account.
Because YouTube is being a little bitch and fucking up the stream count for Jimin right now (don't stop using it--every stream is critical right now, but you can be grump about it while you do), I also signed up for a free trial of Apple Music today and have liked Jimin's profile there.
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DO NOT ADD HIS SONGS TO YOUR LIBRARY. If you bought FACE songs from iTunes, go into your Apple Music account and delete them from your library for now. If they are in your library, Apple Music will automatically play from there and it won't count for charts.
Just go under Jimin's profile and play them that way. You can keep playing them from your main account without having to switch Apple Music accounts. No limits on number of plays, just click around on other songs for 30-60 seconds from time to time and don't loop. This is gonna be critical for supplementing YouTube handicaps.
While you're working on that, you gotta fire up your premium Spotify accounts. Make sure all your accounts are following the artist as a monthly listener.
You know you can play something 20 times on Spotify and then you're done with that account for that song for the day. So keep an eye out for how many times the songs of FACE play in your list and set an alarm so you can switch to the next premium Spotify account and keep working.
There are two ways of charting FACE on Spotify. You can play the album all the way through, with the songs all in order, or you can prioritize the title track and use the rest of the album and other BTS songs as filler.
I'm gonna be following JRJ-OT7's lead on this because Jennifer has more than earned my trust when it comes to chart goals, but if you want to tailor your own experience, here are examples of how to flesh things out (album order vs. title track priority):
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If you're making your own lists and queues and whatnot, please remember to include fillers like On the Street, Smoke Sprite, and Vibe as new releases and the Astronaut, Wildflower, More, Fake Love, and Sweet Night for milestones. Please also add in Left and Right, Dreamers, and Stay Alive as we only have four days left to help Jungkook break the 1 Billion Record.
So to recap:
*Watch and share the hell out of the premiere video.
*Prioritize the title track Like Crazy (English and Korean versions) but it's a short album so hit all songs in your playlists.
*Download your pre-sale purchases.
*Prioritize making digital purchases today. Make new accounts and use gift cards if you need to.
*Premium streaming accounts count three times as much in the charts. Use free trials for YouTube, Spotify, Apple Music, and Amazon Music. Stream the album like crazy on all of those. (If you have premium accounts, you can open all of those in their own browsers and hit 'em all at once on one device if you have to--headphone recommended so you don't go nuts.)
*Delete Face songs from your library in Apple Music first.
*Search manually the first 24 hours on YouTube, then switch to playlists.
*Shazam the songs as you play them.
*Never loop. Never shuffle. Never use VPN.
*Ignore the bullshit from antis and drama queens. Today and tomorrow belong entirely to our artist. We focus on Jimin and only Jimin, and we encourage each other with a positive attitude, good humor, and sheer grit.
I intend to be awake and stream actively for 24 straight hours starting at midnight EST tonight, so I'm going to hop offline now and get some rest.
If you have questions, you might want to take a look at the BTS Tutorial masterlist.
Good luck and God's speed, puppykitties! Let's lift our boy up!
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obeymeswdwritings · 2 years
Text
MC plays with their hair absentmindedly/head pats
Characters- All (platonic Luke)
Gn!Reader
Warnings- Swearing, Demonus mention
Category- Headcanons
Lucifer
His pride isn’t going to let him admit that he really liked it when you fluffed his hair on your way out of his office, especially since it was most certainly meant to tease him for being strict.
He won’t yell at you for it, but make a remark
“Are you enjoying yourself? Hm. thought as much.”
He’s not going to admit that he likes it, but he’ll blush, encouraging it, and the more you do it, the more he’s likely to smile at it.
If you do it while he’s really drunk, he’ll angrily mumble that it feels nice, pride disintegrating in the face of demonus.
Mammon
He’ll swat your hand away, blushing and muttering angry denials.
Pout for a couple minutes, he’ll start stammering about how “of course ya’d wanna pet the Great Mammon, but ya gotta make it worth my time, alright human?”
He’s in denial.
Later, once he’s willing to admit that maybe he does kinda consider you not all that bad, his attitude will completely switch.
You want to talk about something? Alright, pet his hair first. You want him to go with you to Madame Scream’s? Alright, floof his hair.
No shame, all the shame, what difference is there, that’s his motto.
Leviathan
oh shit oh shit oh shit oh shit oh shit
Wait no it’s fine, it was probably a joke, or an accident or something! That can happen, right? You’re probably just trying to make him feel better.
And then you kept doing it.
Are you referencing one of the animes you’d watched together? Are you teasing him? what the fuck is going on?
Tell him his hair’s soft with a little laugh, he’s going to melt, fall over, cry from joy
I think we can all agree he’d melt really fuckin fast
Obviously he doesn’t mind, but he’ll get kinda sad if he sees you doing it to his brothers, ‘rationalizing’ himself out of jealousy.
Satan
He’s not a cat, you know. He likes cats, but he isn’t one himself.
It’s not that he objects to the behaviors, he’s just a little confused
Towards the beginning he’d just look at you, mildly amused, but as time progressed he ended up really liking it. 
He’s seen it in romance novels (That he’ll never admit to reading) a couple times before but that doesn’t mean he’ll assume it’s romantic, he knows better than to assume that because something’s often seen as romantic, it’s intended as such
When he’s feeling particularly stressed, there's about a 30% chance he’ll ask you to comb your fingers through his hair, blushing the whole time.
Fair warning, he purrs. He genuinely purrs when he’s not paying attention to not.
Asmodeus
At first he’s going to make innuendos about it, but that’s just because you’re ruffling his hair, and he’s gotta see the bit to the end.
Later, once you’ve ended up gently carding through his hair, he might start crying. He’s not entirely used to the kindness in your gestures, give him some time.
When he gets to the point of being entirely used to it, you’re back to the innuendos, but they’re said more teasingly and less flirtatiously. 
Beelzebub
????
He’s fairly confused but he appreciates the affection! Very nice of you!
It centers him in a sense, so fluff his hair when he’s getting particularly upset or hungry.
If he wants you to pet his hair, he’ll bump your hand a couple times, like an affectionate cat.
Belphegor
He loves it. Not at first, mind you, at first he was prepared to fuckin sprint but he realized it was soothing and being Sloth, couldn’t help but get attached
He’ll rest his head on your lap every chance he gets, knowing that you’ll end up stroking his hair at some point.
His hair is extremely silky, and you’ll find it’s nearly irresistible to ruffle his hair as a greeting or a goodbye
Belphie loves getting his hair fluffed. He doesn’t care if you don’t have time, dammit, he wants attention and he wants it now.
Diavolo
He’s thrilled. Not only is he touch-starved, he’s essentially a large puppy, and adores that you’re happy to touch him, even doing it unprompted.
Will lean his head down in a silent request for you to run your fingers through his hair, regardless of Barbatos’ silent annoyance and the setting.
He’s Lord Diavolo, he can do what he wants.
Don’t get too worried if Barbatos lectures him on decorum, he’ll be fine. Probably.
Barbatos
He might mutter something about your behavior being unusual, but he’s going to be mildly upset if you stop.
He’d prefer if you didn’t ruffle his hair in public, but is perfectly fine with you doing it otherwise. 
Barbatos isn’t one to ask you to fluff his hair, content with when you choose to.
Solomon
he’s going to tease you about it
This man will use magic to alter his appearance, give himself cat ears, and somehow make you be the one embarrassed.
Solomon doesn’t believe in shame.
Which isn’t to say he won’t blush a little bit when you’re not looking. He will, don’t worry.
It’s a shame he won’t do it when you can see, though . . . 
Simeon
He’s surprised, to say the least. Happy, but surprised. 
He’s not going to say anything in case you stop but he’ll smile and lean into your hand a bit.
If you pet his hair while he’s writing or jotting down notes, he’ll try and finish what he’s doing quickly so you’ll pay more attention to him, since he knows you try not to distract him.
Luke
He’s going to think you’re making fun of him at first, going along with the chihuahua bit, and isn’t going to be too much happier when he realizes you’re just treating him like a kid.
It’s okay though, he’ll later realize it’s a sign of affection, and then he gets attached to it.
Sometimes he’ll try to jump up and return the gesture, and get really frustrated when he can’t reach. 
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keef-a-corn · 1 year
Text
Rewatching TFP-
Giving you commentary of episode 6 -Masters and Students.
(I would talk about episodes 1 - 5, except I watched them yesterday and it made me realise that they stress me the hell out. Instead I’m going to cover episodes that don’t stress me out nearly as much)
Also I watch Transformers Prime on Stan (I’m pretty sure Stan is only in Australia, but it’s a streaming service and has every episode of TFP), so if any of these time stamps don’t match up, I’m sorry.
~~~~I begin now~~~~
Not saying much about the first part because it’s pretty much as seen.
*intro*
02:52 - scenes like these where it’s just Ratchet and Optimus cannot be viewed without at least one ‘this is proof their marriage certificate exists’ moments.
03:14 - and there it is. Optimus literally just when ‘mm’ and Ratchet immediately switched up his approach, the second approach worked significantly better.
03:44 - I like how you can tell Optimus has significantly larger strides when running compared to Ratchet. He started off further away, but arrived faster and closer.
04:00 - NOTHING BOILS MY BLOOD MORE THAN WHEN MIKO SAID
‘Whoopsie’ LIKE WHO THE FRAG ARE YOU?! WHERE TF DID MIKO GO?!
04:02 - ‘h-what… in the allspark’. Ratchet pronouncing ‘what’ that way is all the proof that’s needed to come to a conclusion that he’s old. Take that clip outta context and everyone witnessing it will know that he’s closer to his deathbed than a mid-life crisis.
04:15 - Not even close to being an accurate comparison.
04:21 - DAMN RIGHT, RATCHET! THEY ARE MAKING A MESS! MIKO BEING WEIRDLY MESSY WITH THE PAINT, BEE AND RAF TRIGGERING FIGHT OR FLIGHT, JACK AND ARCEE… Being weird- I mean.. for the bots, wouldn’t that be like trying to construct a body?
04:27 - then why did you leave it to the last minute, Raf?.
04:34 - Soooo close, Ratchet, but Bulkhead doesn’t need to know about the solar system to help Miko paint, same with Bee needing to know about Volcanoes to assist in constructing a model like that.
04:33 ~ 04:46 - Optimus just standing but like ‘just gonna let him talk it out’
~sorry, not much to say either~
05:55 - I wanna know what Bee’s saying. It seems interesting!
05:58 - Honestly Raf saying that clues me in even less.
06:05 - OPTIMUS’S HAND ON BEE’S SHOULDERRRRR! It’s so big! Aaaaaa
06:06 - Optimus calling Bee awesome.
Also Optimus confirming Bee’s very young.
06:54 - I really like how Peter pronounces ‘Bumblebee’ in Optimus’s voice. Just makes it sound so regal, then you remember it’s the word ‘Bumblebee’. + Optimus had no reason as to choose Bumblebee (aside from plot), Bulkhead was most likely not needed because we saw Miko’s project was pretty much complete and Jack was most likely the only one that would require assistance from Ratchet as Arcee was clearly no help.
07:07 - damn, those two strong as hell.
07:40 - Gotta keep his Bee safe. + he looks so concerned as he watches Optimus walk away.
07:49- Starscream had a whole choreographed dance for ‘rise and serve’
08:15 - I like Skyquake. What a waste. ALSO HE LOWERS HIS UPPER HALF TO TALK TO STARSCREAM, BUT TECHNICALLY HE IS BOWING!
08:55 - LMAO he really just pushed him away.
09:11 - Aww Bee gotta check on Optimusss
09:39 - Optimus just watching them like: 🧍
09:40 - SLAY, SKYQUAKE!
10:11 - Scraaaaaaaaap I love Soundwave’s designnn (I know he shows up earlier in the ep, it was just at this point that I truly stopped to appreciate them)
10:37 - Bee’s eyes are so interesting.
10:50 - Gotta protecc his faaather.
10:56 - Ayo- Bee- WTF?? He really just tapped into his inner insect abilities.
11:01 - Optimus immediately stepping in when Bumblebee was down *cri*
11:04 - He really just threw Bumblebee.
11:30 - Optimus leans in a bit closer when saying ‘vehicle mode’ to Bumblebee. He doesn’t want Skyquake to hear. And Bee kinda perks up as he realises Optimus is right.
11:52 - Ratchet’s inner goat
12:17 - That’s me doing all the work in science because the rest of my group is an idiot.
13:40 - It took me four rewatches to understand that Soundwave repeats ‘must bear witness’ as a command he’s making.
14:00 - of Agent Fowler didn’t show up in this episode, I bet that Optimus and Bee would’ve benefited greatly.
14:22 - Now that I think about it… odds are, Skyquake isn’t calling Bee ‘bug’ because his name is ‘Bumblebee’, instead it’s more likely he called Bee ‘bug’ because he considers him a small inconvenience that could simply be squished. I feel ashamed that it’s taken me this long.
14:39 - Bee’s face rises ever so slightly- he’s obviously happy, it’s just that I never noticed it.
14:58 - See? He’s distracting the bots and giving Skyquake a vehicle mode.
16:33 - Starscream landing so nicely gives me life.
16:58 - he touched da boob.
17:18 - to disagree~ I’m sorry-
18:34 - Oh that must’ve hurt-
18:39 - Father watches son fly off on plane.
18:41 - Father immediately calls in only air support to retrieve son.
18:53 - Bee showing off his surfer skills, but also that he’s smart by committing mid air murder.
19:01 - whoever chose for Bee to make that sound when plummeting to his death, thank you. You couldn’t have chosen a more perfectly silly sound for this very dangerous situation./g
19:04 - yeas, it is, Fowler, so why are you waiting?
19:12 - Bee showing off perfect coordination abilities
19:40 - Damn- Bee teleports now-
19:56 - Optimus condemning the strategy before praising the performance is very smart. I will not explain further
20:08 - I DON’T CARE WHAT ANYONE SAYS, TO ME, OPTIMUS SMILED WHEN RATCHET GOT EXCITED.
20:49 - if there’s a remote, why does the volcano have buttons?
21:08 - Optimus engages with a joke.. why does no one mention this?!
M’kay, those were my thoughts.
Lemme know if you thought differently/disagree with my points/have more to add.
I like hearing people’s perspectives.
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Text
I've been using Pokemon Sleep for about five weeks now. Here's some thoughts below the cut. It's a long one.
First, my opinions about the nuts and bolts of how it works. This is... mostly complaints.
- The monetization in this game is absolutely disgusting. Like just heinous. If you're the kind of person that needs to avoid stuff with microtransactions, do not install this game. I haven't given them a dime, but I've also at this point built up a strong resistance to monetization tricks. DO NOT let your kids play this game if they have a credit/debit card hooked up to their accounts.
- On the flip side, credit where due, when they say on the load screen that you can play 100% of the game without paying, this is true. You'll progress faster and with less effort if you pony up some cash, but the game gives you a decent stream of the premium currency, Diamonds, that will get you access to whatever niceties you'd like. If I wanted something that requires the premium currency to get, I haven't found myself walled behind a massive wait for the drip feed to catch up.
- The game wants roughly thirty minutes to an hour of your time a day not counting the sleep tracking. Three ten to twenty minute chunks. One in the morning to review last night's sleep data and feed Snorlax breakfast, one in the afternoon for lunch, and then one or two in the evening for dinner and switching on the sleep tracking.
- When the app tells you to put your phone on the bed for the sleep tracking, this is actually NECESSARY for how it functions. I had assumed it just uses audio to gauge if you snore or whatever (which it does), but it also uses your phone's accelerometer to determine if you're tossing and turning and by extension how deep you're sleeping. If you put it on a bedside table or something, it'll give you a readout saying you slept like an absolute fucking ROCK. If you're like me and toss and turn a lot, you can actually use this to cheese the game a little since certain Pokemon only appear when you sleep deeper and those are for me quite hard to get without this cheese. I would go so far as to actively recommend this tactic.
- You may notice that's kind of a creepy amount of data to collect and it feels kind of like inviting a stalker into your bedroom. You are correct. The app assures you that the actual sleep data does NOT get transmitted at all. I do not have anything other than their word to confirm that. I don't know if what it collects is fairly standard for other apps like it, but my assumption is yes?
- Because of how it tracks your sleep info, if you sleep with a partner in the same bed it completely skullfucks its tracking.
- If you have an even slightly older phone, the app chugs whenever you try to click anything. There's like a one-second lag on every click in the menu followed by a short load screen. Those 10-20 minute sessions would be about half as long if I had a phone with more processing speed.
Now all the above might sound damning as hell. But here's the thing. I like this app a lot actually. It's DEEPLY flawed, but let's talk about the game's mechanics, which is mostly positives:
- Right at the top, this app has improved my sleep schedule, pardon the pun, practically overnight. My new PC has told me twice now that step one to fixing most of my mental health issues is healthier sleep, which he knows is hard but you gotta try. I've been hesitant to take the meds he prescribed for that, but I heard about this app and figured gamifying sleeping on time would be a great way to get me to actually do it. Worked like a charm. The game asks what you'd like your nightly bedtime to be, and gives you rewards for maintaining it. You get these rewards if you go to sleep either 90 minutes prior to that time, or 30 minutes after. My doctor recommended 30 in each direction for consistency, but they don't send you a reminder notification until that 30 minute mark prior so partial credit I guess? I've missed that bedtime like 3 times in these last five weeks, and yeah my everything is way better.
- Looking at the Pokemon wandering my camp makes my brain make the happy juice in a way most Pokemon stuff really doesn't anymore. Like, there's no battles or anything (although you apparently can transfer to and from Pokemon Go, don't know how well that works because I don't play), so you just get a pleasant kind of domesticity most Pokemon stuff doesn't do.
- Here's the actual gameplay loop. You're researching Pokemon sleep patterns. To do this, you're using some nonsense machine that amplifies local Snorlax's natural aura of sleepiness to attract Pokemon to come sleep by it. Snorlax's are apparently the capybaras of the Pokeworld which I actually love. The more you feed Snorlax, the more powerful this sleepy aura becomes. It resets each week because you go to a new campsite with a new Snorlax. During the day, your team of Pokemon (max of... 5 for some reason instead of the default six everywhere else in this franchise?) gather berries to feed your Snorlax throughout the day in idle-game-esque timers, as well as ingredients for more complicated meals. You take the ingredients, make Snorlax meals up to three times a day (6am-noon for breakfast, noon-6pm for lunch, 6pm-6am for dinner). Each pokemon also has an ability that in some way helps you out. Then you can at any time turn on the sleep tracking, then turn it off when you wake up. After a rest of 90+ minutes has been tracked, it gives you a total of how much power that rest generated, and takes you to a minigame where you photograph the sleeping Pokemon that came to rest in your camp. The more power, the more varied the sleeping positions and the rarer the Pokemon. You can then feed them biscuits to befriend them. You get the equivalent of a Great Ball(/Biscuit) every day which on its own fills about 3/5 of a non-evolved Pokemon's friendship bar (the basic biscuit that you'll use most of the time fills 1/5), so there's always at least some progress towards making a friend. Sometimes a Pokemon is extra hungry and the first thing you feed them is worth triple, and you can also get that same multiplier as an RNG thing without warning. Once you fill up a bar, you've befriended that Pokemon and can now add it to your teams or send it to the professor for candies like you do in Pokemon Go. You are also given candies for every Pokemon you attracted even if you don't befriend them, plus "Sleep Points" based on how long you slept for that can be exchanged for items like more biscuits (for reference, a single basic biscuit is roughly 1.5 times a good night's sleep... fucking YIKES) plus "Dream Shards" for how cool the photos you took are, which are used mostly for leveling up your Pokemon and upgrading your camp.
- I love this gameplay loop actually. It feels way more like these Pokemon are my friends as opposed to wild animals I've caught.
- Leveling up and evolving take large amounts of those candies and dream shards. The candies feel like the primary gate on progression.
Overall, this is a game I like a lot despite its flaws, and the positive impact it's had on my health even in this short span is hard to understate. I wish they'd back off with the creepy monetization so I could actively recommend instead of recommend with an asterisk. But yeah that's my thoughts on this weird ass product.
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oreganocactus · 1 year
Text
gintama if they were squid games
i love squid game and i love gintama hence this post.
gintoki - inkling with some kind of roller. you’d think he uses the splatana but that’s dead wrong he’s one of those dudes who vaguely flings into your direction then you’re dead because the splash damage is fucking insane OR he just rolls over you without noticing. i’m thinking the dynamo roller bc dynamos don’t do shit but when they do its real fucking scary
kagura - take a guess. (octoling + splat brella b/c undercover brella sucks ass rn and they wont fix it)
shinpachi - inkling splattershot. don’t lie to me of course he’d play that. he tries to “change it up a little” from splattershot jr but he just plays splattershot instead. he’s not that good but he at least tries to lay down cover fire so you appreciate him
katsura - inkling splatana. you KNOW he doesn’t play about run speed up he’s running like 10 subs of run speed up and like 4 of quick respawn up. one of those dudes who rushes into main every single time and consistently gets his ass beat OR spends 30 minutes inking spawn
takasugi - inkling pussy who plays inkbrush and whines whenever someone doesn’t die in like 2 hits because they know the basics of how to counter. he sucks as an inkbrush and honestly should be just playing like a blaster but he refuses to switch
sakamoto - you KNOW it’s gotta be dualies. dualie squelcher octoling that never dies but also only gets 3 kills so who’s really winning here? you gotta love him still because he keeps that one sniper so distracted they can’t shoot you
kondo - octoling heavy splatling who is absolutely insane on the rare occasion his shots connect. you kinda wish he wasn’t there but he’s great on salmon run
hijikata - (controversial) sploosh-o-matic. + octoling. absolutely amazing player but he dies every 3 seconds bc he rushes out into mid and dies instantly
sougo - are you kidding me. explosher inkling. he’s one of those exploshers that truly make you wonder why the fuck you paid 60 dollars for the game + 20 dollars for nintendo online
kamui - clash blaster octoling that spawncamps like his life depends on it. makes you quit turf war so you go play anarchy and he’s sweating in tower control. everywhere you turn BAM another clash blaster
mutsu - jet squelcher octoling. she’s always got your fucking back always camped out somewhere and ends up with like 14 kills and you never see her ever
tsukuyo - bamboozler inkling. makes you want to blow yourself up because she’s really really good with it. absolutely makes use of crazy amounts of run speed up to hit-and-run
kyuubei - octobrush inkling (notice the transgenderism) who isn’t that good at covering turf but splats like their life depends on it
otae - flingza roller inkling who goes after everyone in sight and will never let any shooter rest as long as she is alive
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stayathome-ts · 4 months
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Man I love being really fucking angry and not being able to do much about it. (everything else below the cut, copy-pasted because there's no way in hell I'm rewriting this. You're welcome for the wall of text)
I'm so goddamn angry, why do we have to be so goddamn angry lately? Oh I know, a month straight of being behind in work, all because we got sick or some bullshit, I don't even remember now! But no, now we've got an exam on Monday, and someone told us this morning that a pseudo-grandparent of ours who we haven't seen in years died last week. So that's great! Throw another thing on top of the pile, why don't you, yeah just see how much we can stand before we break knowing that it's only one more week til the term's over.
I can't even brute force my way through it, that's not how that works, I'm left fucking angry at our brain and our body for not being able to do what we need to do despite having all the will in the world to do it.
These last couple weeks have felt like a slice of eternity, it's just math math math, more math, math math, just two more assignments then you'll be caught up, oh hey look you have a biology lecture to go to at 8:30 in the morning and then pass out when you get home, now it's time to do math again except you can't, go to the tutoring center, get something worked out in five minutes that you'd been working on for five hours, go back home, math math math, nap, math math, have a fucking breakdown, turn in homework and see you only have two more assignments, do some math and more math, stare at the unfolded laundry that's been sitting there for weeks now, math math math, turn in homework, check your grades and see that you have two more assignments, remember to hydrate oh look you have hobbies remember those hobbies? Yeah I remember those hobbies, good fucking luck engaging with them though, because guess what, you have more math to do! Except no, now someone's overloaded in the system and you have to deal with that, have fun staring at your graph paper wondering how the hell to do any of this for the next hour, do more math now that you've realized you only have two more assignments, do more math, do you think you can go to the protest this weekend? No? Well either way you'll hear about horrible things every single day, often at times when you're just trying to do stuff like eat. Do more math though, only two more assignments. Have you noticed the days kind of bleed together lately? No you don't, or at least you won't for a while because you keep switching and dissociating from it so good luck trying to bring anything about this up in therapy. Remember to work on math and get that assignment done though. Math math math, shower, eat, more math, dream about having calculator issues, think about your best friend who you'll never see again and doesn't even exist here, switch out to someone who doesn't have that problem, do more math, get distracted by the fact that holy shit you're a husband now! Isn't that great! Gotta do more math first though because you only have a couple more to go. Kiss your spouse. Comfort the kid you take care of. Plan birthday presents for him and his brothers. Stare at the laundry. Contemplate folding the laundry but don't. Pack up your bag, unpack your bag, find the chargers, put away your cane, get out the calculator and the computer and the graph paper and the notebook and the math textbook and the pencil bag. Do this problem, check it, you got it wrong, go over it, triple check, you can't find a problem, do it again, do it again, check it, you got it wrong, go get a cup of coffee instead. Check it again and oh look there's the solution, that wasn't so hard was it. Only thirty more, and two more of that before you're caught up. Remember to stay caught up on how people were tortured today and you couldn't stop them. Hydrate. Stretch. Keep your body in okay condition. Do some more math, watch Columbo or X Files while you're at it, get some dopamine from that and almost feel normal again. Dance in the hallway while you're at it, dance like no one's watching because they aren't, have fun! Have you worked on math lately? Hey by the way this friend who relies on you in some ways is bpd splitting on you and you need to talk with her for a couple hours to make sure she doesn't drink too much and knows you love her, oh by the way did you hear that so-and-so died and you never got to see him again since the last time you went to that church in 2020? You can deal with that later though, you've got math to do and it's already 11 in the morning, you've really got to get a move on now, just get the calculator and the computer and the pencil bag and the headphones and the charger and the math textbook and the notebook out and get started, you're only two assignments behind and the end of the term is only a week away just like it has been for the last. four. weeks.
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michi-tala · 2 years
Note
Alucard and D find their S/O's journal of their feelings for them. Can we please have the "what-if" scenarios play out before and after they started dating?
I have another detail to include about my request: the journal is written in a way where the lover is writing to their sweetheart about their thoughts, daily routine, and things that trouble them while asking what they'd do in their shoes.
Hellsing journal
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Warnings: You have a sparky attitude. Like two swear words too.
Interesting ask. Let me see if I can do justice to this. Alucard doesn't have any real secrets by this point to most of us, standard opus modi with All Father of Vampires directly and/or indirectly. As for D, I have a separate written story yet to finish.
(2180 word count)
❗️Note the dates are done day-month-year.
Hellsing Organization•🍷•
Month: June
24-06-2022
I have just met the members of Hellsing. I had been told by Walter C. Dornez, that Alucard was a vampire in the beginning, but I thought it was a joke about the main assassin, because he slept in the basement and only worked at night.
I couldn't be farther to the right of wrong if I tried. I do not know which is more frightening: his maniacal cackle of a laugh like a mad man or his eyes the color of whirling, twisting colors that puts molten rock to shame. I thought if vampires really existed, which obviously I know now they do, their eyes would be an albino just glowing also.
I am unsure on how to keep a written journal on paper as Shadow King can go through solid objects. Where does one keep something secret from this Vampire oddly named Alucard?
25-06-2022
I am struggling with how short my uniform is. I am so busy tugging on the hem, I get distracted easily. The Vampire named Alucard thinks it's funny one minute and the next he's belittling me.
"Ghouls do not care if your knickers show," his eyes glowing coals. "Then why should you?"
So now I hit my targets every time. I picture Alucard as the target. I have the best shooting marks currently. It almost rivals the Unholy King and he cheats because he is just that-a vampire. Anyrate, don't get me mad..I shoot much better.
As for the peeking panties, I have found some American volleyball shorts to wear. I have them overnight shipped so tomorrow is the last day of knickers flashing.
26-06-2022
So, I couldn't sleep due to switching hours for sleeping. Captain Pip Bernadotte of the wild Geese mercenaries was trying to make me feel better. He explains that it's Alucard. He is a mystery at best.
Apparently he resides in the basement which I suppose makes sense. Like he would live in the sunny arboretum..though I did see him up and getting a snack..A negative blood packet. So thinking the whole sleeping in the day and exploding chunks of truly dead vampire is a lie.
✔️•Garlic-hell and no
✔️•Crosses-yes and no. Alone no. Blessed bullets, yes.
✔️•Churches-see garlic. Alucard could go to church
✔️•Holy water-no. Add water to the blood and swallow.
✔️•Stakes-yes and no. Gotta get close to stake.
✔️•Hydrogen atomic bomb-too many human causities
✔️•Virgins-like unicorns for attracting vampires
28-06-2022
I didn't write yesterday due to exhaustion. It was my first mission and I thought it went great. I mean the vampires and ghouls terminated and no human casualties. Yet that wasn't good enough for the Vampire Alucard.
What would have he done differently?
I play the mission over and over in my mind. I need to speed up my reaction time, of course. No idea what was not to his liking.
I have been able in the past to ignore those who critique unfairly but his words are so cutting. It's as if he has spent a century perfecting his cruel words as he looks down his aquiline nose at me.
Perhaps I should just hang with the Geese and stay out of Alucard's way. He's just as mean towards them and even his 'child' Sera Victoria. She was so brave in the past during Cheddar.
30-06-2022
It seems that I am only able to get an entry every other day. Only Pip spends time conversing with me. He's teaching me French so some code words are not in English during combat.
I am pretty sure Alucard threatened them not to associate with me during daylight hours. I have been working on not being in sight or ear shot of the Vampire. Why is he doing this?
Month: July
02-07-2022
This evening Alucard truly cornered me in a long hallway. An arm on each side of my head, pressed against the wall.
"Just because your first mission was a success does not mean it was perfect. You were reckless for starters," he actually hissed like a giant two legged cat.
"Dually note Mr. Alucard," I ducked under his right arm. "I have a meeting with Master Hellsing…"
Sir Hellsing has decided that I should be in bdu's like the mercenaries, just a Hellsing armband and insignia.
She told me after some time Alucard will settle with me around. If He doesn't get better, I'm going to have a word with him on my time and shoot him if need be. Not like it will kill him, he's undead to begin with.
04-07-2022
Today Alucard chose to lean against a wall and silently observe my shooting practice. The silence was a welcoming change. I had ideas for upgrades in weapons for the Hellsing Organization and Sir Integra agreed on good concept ideas.
What is Alucard's game? At least my boss Integra is pleased with my employment at Hellsing. And in the end, she's what matters.
This entry is short as I have a meeting with the Round Table about my weapon ideas. Sir Penwood seems actually excited for being an upper class Englishman.
05-07-2022
Today was very exciting! It seems I have been pulled for working in the weapons section. I am back to days up and no more Alucard to put me down with cruel words.
Cutting this short as I need to sleep!
07-07-2022
The Vampire King was up early in the evening and waiting for me to eat dinner. I sat and ate my yummy food while he lectured me. The meals are always perfect and not just English cuisine. The curry dishes have been amazing.
I can't actually remember anything he said.
I just wasn't interested in hearing what he had to boss me about. There must be a reason Sir Hellsing is Master to him. If I am not in the field I don't need to listen to his bullshit.
He stopped mid-sentence and left the table when he realized I wasn't going to react. I'm not under foot anymore and beginning a career to help Hellsing save lives.
09-07-2022
I have not seen or heard of Alucard for two days now. Perhaps he has decided to move on to picking on someone else? Maybe.
Was he jealous of the others taking my time up? Maybe.
Was he actually okay with me accompanying on the couple missions before my change of positions? IDK
Now that he isn't in my face, I realize he is not just handsome but a beautiful man..creature?
His voice was deep and so enticing mixed with a growl. But why such hurtful words? IDK..
11-07-2022
This is the first time I have had a chance to write! I have been so busy working with ammunition designers. I am even coming up with like small grenade bombs that project more harmful materials. It's a last resort for crowd control of ghouls.
As for the Vampire in the basement? He seems distant and distracted. I am not sure what could possibly make him like that.
Do vampires have bad dreams? Soul terrorizing nightmares?
I would figure they dream of swimming in their favorite type of blood. Long nights of reading endless books, the real world a distant whisper to them, relating to them.
His new behavior I am not asking about to anyone. I will see what I can learn on my own. I am curious though: Alucard is Dracula spelled backwards.
Could he possibly be the Count mentioned in Bram Stoker’s Dracula? That would make him Vlad the Impaler? Some historical information could be useful and it's a way to stay out of sight too.
13-07-2022
It seems I have two passions now: my new career and the history of Vlad III Dracula. If Alucard is indeed this man from history then some of his behavior makes sense. Though it doesn't excuse him from his disrespectful words.
It also seems I am to go on an occasional hunt with the Impaler King. What for? He is more than capable of being on his own. Did he say to Sir Hellsing I needed more training with him?
Need to make this short. I go with Alucard in a few hours to do surveillance at some club: Rose's Thorn. That sounds Goth in nature.
14-07-2022
That damn vampire is insane! He had Walter order more Goth approved clothing. Don't get me wrong the clothes are really nice and in my size but for surveillance that led to killing ghouls. The Vampire controlling them escaped. Alucard says it's my fault for hesitation on a shot that rescued two sisters that were just on the street passing by. The enemy vampire was holding them hostage.
It led to me getting rushed by ghouls and Alucard feeling the need to rescue me in the meantime. Hence he was unable to deliver the death blow to our hated enemy. Though I think he did it to 'cop' a feel of my body.
Apparently he's a boob and ass kinda guy.
Okay got to sign off. His royal Impaler King is raising a ruckus in his quarters. Is he shooting at rats? Why would one give the most powerful Vampire hand guns that do damage a cannon ball could?
15-07-2022
Okay I learned a lot more on the half mad count. He prefers my company most of all. That he's jealous of any other male around me.
"(Y/n) words are harder to capture my emotions about you. You still need to go on missions to keep you tun3d up, so of course you will accompany me. That Mercenary and his band of jokers will get you killed," he smirks. "I can get quite jealous of others around you…"
"Mr. Alucard, why is that? I got the strong impression you didn't like me.."
"Scumpa mea, I wanted to see if you were a follower or leader. Would you fold or rise to face me," he tilts his head while flashing his fangs.
Why do I find that sexy?
I should slap that smug look off his face. Though he might take that as an invitation to do more than trying to seduce me. He is all kinds of bat shit crazy but with long learned charisma. I don't even think he was playing with my mind. It was all natural and no need to "glam" my mind.
I am not sure what to do at this point. I think I will give this some time and not fall for him like I want to. I want to drown in an ocean of shadows that is him. He's just going to break my heart anyway.
I would have preferred using verbal communication even though 90% of communication is nonverbal.
I am not sure how or why I fell asleep in his room. Why does he have a bed? For a romp with all his conquests because a coffin can be off putting.
Draga mea you think too low of me, let us talk soon~Alucard
18-07-2022
It seems I got knocked out finishing the mission. How was I to know that a vampire could lift chunks of demolished buildings from Alucard and the enemy vampire fighting? Why did it resort to mono e mono physical battle? Was Alucard showing off?
It figures I would get hurt.
That and my phone went 'missing' for a period of time. Seras returned it to me with a strange look on her face. I have just noticed a short message typed in my journal by Alucard. Let's talk?
What are we talking about? My feelings about him? Yes I have romantic feelings towards him. Do I find him sexy? He's a death God that is the most beautiful man I have ever been in company.
20-07-2022
Alucard coos in my ear that I have fifteen minutes to write in my journal. Where do I begin? Dinner was incredible and the moonlight walk through the rose garden.
I asked for us to move slowly. It's not even been a month at Hellsing and we have had a date. He flirts constantly and says dirty innuendos but that seems just to be him. Alucard is quite affectionate and insists I be moved to his quarters.
My gut says bad deal but my heart chooses yes to become deeply involved. My fifteen minutes are up..
Part of being human is to fall deeply in love~Alucard
@artsy-jandi @alucardownsmyass @hunnie880 @amikartest
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littlepossumonstilts · 6 months
Note
Do the wonderland peeps do anything for Halloween? Or even consider it to exist?
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Of course! There's dancing, drinks, food and a whole celebration that spans over 2 days (30-31). Jack usually hosts a large ball for everyone in the kingdom to join in on the 31. The day before the ball, a carnival opens up. It stays until the 1st of November for children or families that just don't feel like going to the big party. And don't worry, the celebrations don't start on those last few days. The entire month of October is dedicated to the harvest and the beauty found in death. Everyone is encouraged to visit the graves of their loved ones and give their blessings to wish the departed well. Every year in the castle, Jack calls a meeting for all the staff on the first of October. Jack likes being consistent, so he requests everyone stick to one theme this year when decorating the castle and dressing up. Everyone then gives their opinions on what they think the theme should be for this year and the majority vote gets picked. The servants and knights are all allowed to take the night off for Halloween if they like, but usually they stick around for the festivities. Jack even assists when preparing the food. He wants everyone to have a good time, so if a few of the cooks take time off to hang out with their families, he's happy to help in their place. Has he killed people over merely looking at his daughter weird? Yes. Will it happen again? Probably. Does that make him evil? .... No?
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Alice loves dressing up, whether it be for a secret picnic or a nice dinner. She was raised by Jack, so I don't know what else you'd expect. She has all the money in the world to make new outfits, and boy does she use it. Jack tries to plead with her to not dress him up, saying she doesn't need to go through all the trouble, but she never listens. And he always caves. It's a cycle for them. Halloween is one of the few times Alice and Jack actually wear their crowns, or any hats at all for that matter. They like keeping their hair perfect and untouched, but sometimes the hats are just too cute to not wear. There was one time Alice convinced Jack to wear a dress and a new mask Alice had custom made for him. She wore a matching suit and mask to go with it since the theme was swapping/switching for that year. Alice had never seen so many people swarm Jack to flirt with him, and honestly it was the funniest part of the night for her. Jack now refuses to answer any questions about that night, or the dress. Alice's favorite Halloween was when everyone had secretly came to the party wearing rabbit masks. She never cleared it with Jack until he stepped out to make the announcement that the party would begin and just stopped for an entire minute to process the scene.
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William enjoys the festivities from afar. He sends out the invitations and that's about it. He spends majority of the night in his study with Bones reading. He's perfectly content staying behind, don't worry. He has all he needs. His clocks, a plate of food, a book and a bottle of wine. Sometimes Ophelia will pop into the party for food and a bottle of champagne, but she prefers to stay mostly sober just in case someone decided they wanted to fuck around and find out. It's randomized every year but she'll just stay in one place for majority of the night. Jack reassures her no one is going to try and kill him on Halloween of all days, but then again he's still unaware of the fact that the person who drowned in the apple tub was not drunk. And it was not an accident. A lady's gotta do what a lady's gotta do to protect her king, even if that means framing someone's death as an accident to protect his feelings.
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Cheshire does what he does every year. Cause mischief and pester Jack. What's it with purple cats and just being the worst? Anyways. Cheshire spends majority of the night stealing candy from children and drinking. By the end of night, like clockwork, he shows up at jack's window with a bag of candy in hand to proclaim his love. And just like clockwork, Jack refuses his proposition and refuses his bribes. There was this one year, however, when Cheshire had finally shut up about his affections. He found Jack drunk and nearly about to fall over on the stairs leading to his room.. He honestly considered taking advantage of the situation, given that Jack couldn't curse him out again this time. Hell, he was so inebriated, he could barely even speak a single word of english. But the sight was so depressing Cheshire decided against it and just brought Jack to bed, leaving the bag of candy and stolen pastries by the window.
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Cloning Clyde
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Hours played: Around 10
Completion: 100%'d
I believe this was among the first wave of games for the Xbox 360 marketplace, and man, I remember playing the shit out of the trial version of this game as a kid. I don't think I even knew what the concept of trial version meant, but that didn't stop me from replaying the game again and again. Recently, I saw it was cheap on Steam and decided to buy it and finally see once and for all what was in the full version of the game.
The biggest thing I love about the game is its graphics, honest. Everybody has some old video game artstyle they really love, be it the beautiful pixel art on some of the titles on the PC-98, or the early uncanny stages of 3D on the PS1. For me, it's gotta be the specific kind of 3D in this game that I can't find the words to describe (maybe when I get better at writing). Combined with the surprisingly animated Clydes you control, and the game has this style that, while old, does not feel very dated. I absolutely adore how this game looks.
Anyway. You control the Clydes in individual levels, defeating security robots and exploding chickens to reach the goal while using various switch mechanisms, using animals to get further, and combining your Clyde WITH an animal to gain new abilities. The game only really has a handful of assets: just four or five level types, the aforementioned enemies are the only enemies, and the number of different puzzle-related objects are probably in the single-digits. Despite that, I never really got tired of the game's small handful of assets. I always enjoyed kicking the crap out of the security robots or jumping around the map riding a sheep, or pulling a random lever to see what happens. What the game has is charm.
However, the game does have a big weak point: the level design. Aside from the occasional puzzle that made me think a little bit, most levels can be beaten while functioning on autopilot. If you're going for 100%, the levels can just feel tedious, since some of them have 15 or 20 Clydes that you have to control and have escape individually, one at a time. Other times, the levels just get questionable, like how there were a couple levels toward the end that were very, very spacious for seemingly no reason. I didn't hate it, but it felt like instead of doing something new, they just took a level and spread it way out. GImmicks get reused, objects get used in the same way, and thus, a lot of the game's 30 or so levels blend together. There were a couple that stuck out, like a neat catapult puzzle that made me have to think for a minute, or the penultimate level, which was this absolutely massive sprawling course that felt like this game's The Great Maze from Brawl, but generally, most were forgettable.
Another gripe is the lack of background music. You'll get a little melody at the start of levels or for defeating every security robot in a level, but otherwise, it's just silent. In a game like Frogger Returns, I'm focused so much on not dying that I don't notice as much, but in a more explorative, relaxed game like this, it really bugs me.
For what the game has, I still really like it. It pretty much was what my childhood self remembered: this fun, jank little game with funny little character animations. I really, really wanted to give this game a 7, but it just doesn't quite reach that bar. Too much of the game just doesn't feel like it's pushing what it has to the limit. It's not the lack of assets that's the problem, it's that they mostly get used in very surface-level ways. Most levels in the game you could stick at the beginning and few would bat an eye.
Overall score: 6/10. Can recommend, was a fun experience. If you're an achievement hunter-type, this game is pretty easy to 100% on top of being relatively short.
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sarah-dipitous · 1 year
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Hellsite Nostalgia Tour 2023 Day 98
Swap Meat/The Poison Sky
"Swap Meat"
Plot Description: While investigating a school, Sam is the target of a teenager's body-switching spell
Would I Survive the First Five Minutes??: No one died.
"I would like to purchase and alcohol please" this kid who has freaky friday'd Sam is already precious to me. Sorry. This kid...is me when people roughly my age are subtly dropping hints that they're flirting. This kid was already a gigantic nerd (affectionate), but now he has Sam Winchester's frame to match the...giant-ness...i have an English degree...
Look...*I* know Sam and Dean are taking this seriously and aren't bad guys, it's obvious their old babysitter and her husband know that, too, but even if a poltergeist carved "murder (child)" onto my stomach, if i were a teenage girl, I'd be really uncomfortable about having to pull up my shirt to show that to the 26 and 30 year old strange men in my house.
I know this isn't a McDonald's but remember when McDonald's had those salads you shook??? What a weird time...
That kid just hit Sam with a blow dart and knock him out??
This kid has NO IDEA what he's gotten himself into. Also, could this have been a weird loophole to the whole Lucifer Wearing Sam to the Prom problem? If it's not really Sam in there/if it's Sam but not his body? Just something to consider
Sam. These are a lot of judgements...they might be accurate, but fuck you anyway
Why does this kid's dad loo like Great Value Tom Wambsgans?
Is this going to end up being one of those "you better appreciate the brother you have" episodes??
Kiddo...you gotta be way better at being Sam. I wish we could see Jared say these lines, though...
WHY DO THESE KIDS WANT TO KILL DEAN???? Omg...these kids are idiots playing around with LITERAL DEMONS
It was purely a breather episode, which is oddly nice to get with the fate of humanity on the line. Yes we got some small info drops, like apparently, you don't have to be Sam's consciousness to consent to being Lucifer's vessel. You just need to be in Sam's body. Seems worrisome.
"Been On My Mind...": Does it count if it's Sam's body but not his mind??
"The Poison Sky"
Plot Description: With planet Earth choking under the poison sky, the doctor mus stop the Sontarans' threat to the planet
I would have HATED to wait a week to see them get Wilf out of the car.
Evil Martha doing evil things.
[Insert "I've Had Enough of This Guy" meme here re: Rattigan]
I don't like that so much of Martha's time was taken up with jealousy over Rose, and now in order to...I dunno, make it up to her? She's hopping in on a WHOLE bunch of Donna's adventures. And I know part of that is David getting ready to leave, too, but still...5 out of 13 episodes Donna gets without someone who is, was, or will become important to the Doctor tagging along. 4 if you count the fact that Peter Capaldi's appearance in The Fires of Pompeii gets added into the canon of the Twelfth Doctor.
Literally every fucking time this fucker opens his mouth, I feel like he's an Musk stand-in but from like 2 years after twitter launched. His tantrum over how clever his is after everyone from his institute leaves, everyone he chose to continue the human race after the Sontarans killed everyone else. He had a MATING PLAN AND THOUGHT THAT WAS NORMAL.
Moms fucking HATE the Doctor lol
I love how much the Doctor believes in Donna <3
YES YES YES, GIRL. Whack the Sontaran with a fucking hammer
NOT THE "ARE YOU MY MUMMY?" REFERENCE
This...probably shouldn't work exactly the way it is. I'm no scientist, but I feel like setting fire to even just one toxin overtaking the whole Earth's atmosphere would have a much larger effect
The Doctor saves the whole day, avoids dying, and Donna hits him upon seeing him again. Love them
I'm gonna cry SO MUCH at the 60th anniversary special, won't I? I just love Wilf a lot.
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