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trensu · 3 years

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Jon's Creeping Terror Fun Fact Corner!

You know how Cecil has his Fun Fact Science Corner segment on his radio show? Well, Jon has his own show produced by The Magnus Studio. It's an educational kids show all about the Entities of Fear!! It's a very specific kind of kids show. You know the ones. Those kids shows that children are absolutely mad for but any adult in their vicinity is left deeply unsettled by them? Yep. On the surface, the show seems fine but if any adult dwells on the content for more than five minutes, they are left feeling very very unnerved, especially since the host, one Jonathan Sims, seems more than a little unhinged half the time.

The show is so popular it gets almost 15 whole episodes! (It gets cancelled at 14 bc at that point it had received far too many retrospective complaints from parents to continue any further). Sometimes, the episodes even have special guests!! Although it got cancelled, you can obviously still find it on the internet if you know where to look. There's even compilations of all the show's best Unhinged moments.

The Vast Episode

Jon: Today's episode is about the Vast! And to tell us more about it we have Simon Fairchild visiting us. Kids, if you ever see this man in person, please run very far in the opposite direction.

Simon: Thank you for that warm introduction, Jon. Now children, who here likes ROLLER COASTERS?

Jon: And that's it for our special guest [proceeds to literally kick an old man until he's off screen] Do not trust this man and please be careful when going on roller coasters in the future.

The Lonely Episode

Jon, reading from the teleprompter: We have an expert of the Lonely with us, Mr. Peter Lu--what? No!! Why's he here? Get him off my set! What do you mean no? I don't care how much funding he gives the studio!! He tried to take Martin away!

[scene cuts off and starts back up with Martin sitting next to Jon, looking particularly sweet and cuddly in a knitted jumper]

Jon: Here we have m-my Martin, I-I mean my ASSISTANT Martin Blackwood. Say hi to Mr. Blackwood, children.

[Jon is a twitchy mess and cannot even look at Martin's direction. Martin looks flushed]

Martin: Er, yes, h-hello.

Jon: Martin has experience [this is hissed with all the venom he can muster] with the Lonely. He's going to teach us the best way to avoid that evil, conniving bast--

Martin, hastily cuts in: Yes, well! Kids, who do you have in your life that you love? It can be anyone! Your siblings, your pets, your friends! Anyone at all!

[at the edge of the set, just barely visible, Peter can be seen crammed into a cage gleefully guarded by Daisy]

(it's during this episode Jon finds out that he's not allowed to use naughty words on the show. All the stuff with the murder and the skinning and the worms and such is fine! Just no cussing. Jon is befuddled and aghast. This is why Hopworth was not allowed as a guest; he's a very swear-y man)

The Corruption Episode

[Jon is seen clutching a jar of ashes throughout the entire episode with absolutely no explanation as to what it is or why it's there]

Jon, gesturing manically: and that's why it's important to see a doctor when you're sick and have an exterminator on speed dial.

[Martin comes onto the scene with a worried look on his face. The screen goes to black for a moment, then reappears with Jon still clutching his jar but looking significantly calmer. He smiles at the camera and it almost looks normal]

Jon: To finish the episode, can you demonstrate the proper handwashing technique we taught you at the start? Be sure to tell your parents what you've learned about infection control and have them show you where the CO2 is kept in your home!

The Hunt Episode

Jon, earnestly happy: This is my best friend Daisy! She's going to help us learn about the Hunt. She's one of the bravest people I know.

[Daisy turns away to hide a shy smile before clearing her throat and starting in on a rehearsed lecture. The episode ends with her and Jon making the children repeat the "don't listen to the blood, listen to the quiet" mantra and also "all cops are bastards."]

(Basira, in post production: ...yeah, that's fair.)

The Flesh Episode

Parents are horrified when they hear their children singing "you are what you eat, meat is meat!" whenever they play after that episode airs.

(Martin: Just to be clear, we're encouraging cannibalism??

Jon: no! ...maybe? i don't know, Martin, they told me it tested well with the focus group children

Martin: yes, okay, but WHY did you come up with that jingle?

Jon: Don't look at me like that, I'm not crazy, Martin! I wouldn't just eat a person. But, well, if someone asked me to eat them like, after they died, I wouldn't necessarily say no...?

This conversation was recorded and leaked somehow. And that's how Actual Cannibal Jon Sims became a trending meme. He has to do a PR statement confirming that he "has never knowingly eaten a person" and that that was "a completely hypothetical discussion." This convinces as many people as you think it would.)

The Stranger Episode

Nikola: I don't much like children. Not enough skin on them to do anything really fun.

Jon: Why are you--how did you even get in?? S-Security! Someone come get her out of--

Nikola: oh, but I have information for the little ones! [she pulls out a basket of high-end skincare products and looks directly into the camera with her featureless face] These are the lotions that are best for Archivist flesh but I'm sure they work for the kiddies as well! You all want to grow up to have lots of beautiful skin don't you? Here, let me show you how to use them! [attempt to lotion Jon]

Jon: [flinches away] Security! O-or Daisy. DAISY!

[growling is heard and we get a flash of a wolfish Daisy body-slamming Nikola to the ground. The rest of the episode has Tim shoving Jon off screen and going on a rant about circuses and how to best explode them. This becomes one of their most popular episode amongst the children]

Breekon and Hope show up occasionally in the background of various episodes and become something like an Easter egg for fans of the show.

Anyway, I love the idea of kids adoring socially awkward, neurotic mess of a man Jonathan Sims. Jon is completely confounded by his popularity but also, he's glad of it bc that means the children will be more prepared if they ever encounter any of the Entities (most parents think it's all fiction, except for the ones who've had Encounters with one of the entities; Jon ends up with a sort of underground cult following comprised of survivors of fear encounters)

I blame @lemonisinplay (and Jonny Sims) for the entirety of this post, tbh. She came up with the name and half the stuff here XD

#tma #the magnus archives #jonathan sims #martin blackwood #daisy tonner #basira hussain #tim stoker #peter lukas #simon fairchild #nikola orsinov #jonmartin #trensu tells stories #jon's creeping terror fun fact corner

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trensu · 3 years

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Masterpost: Jon's Creeping Terror Fun Fact Corner

I have decided to collect all parts of this little make-believe terrifying kids show in one post bc sometimes i can be organized! So here we have it, Jon the Kid-Approved, Parent-Hated show host of nightmares!! A big thanks to @lemonisinplay for enabling me with her frankly genius ideas :D

---

The Original Post - featuring the Vast (Simon Fairchild), the Lonely (Peter Lukas), the Corruption (no guest appearance bc the corruption is a big NOPE), the Hunt (Daisy Tonner), the Flesh (no guest appearance bc Jared Hopworth is not suitable for children), and the Stranger (no guest appearance bc Nikola technically wasn't invited and yet she's here anyway)!

The Desolation Episode - aka, book burning is a fun activity for all ages!

Tim Stoker, PR Extraordinaire - Tim loves his job, actually

The Terminus Episode - Oliver Banks is too hot (hot damn). And unfortunately not great with children

The Beholding Episode - aka everyone hates Elias bc who likes their boss, really?

Special Segment: Get Crafty with Gertrude! - Good Old Gertie out there protecting children...with knives

The Great Leitner Burning Fundraiser - in which we once again promote book burning!

Gerry-Ghost Gets Fanmail - what it says on the tin.

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trensu · 3 years

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@lemonisinplay continues to bless me with her BRILLIANT thoughts on Jon's Creeping Terror Fun Fact Corner! if i'd known this was gonna become a Thing, i'd have given it a shorter name lololol. She cheerfully pointed out that these kids shows sometimes have an activity section where you can make arts and crafts right in your own home! And who better to lead an arts and crafts segment than the woman who made an accurate map of the distortion?

[Scene opens to a dim room. at the center of the shot, a large table covered in files, books, and scattered sheets of paper. An old woman sits in a chair that should dwarf her but seems instead too small to fit her stern expression and perfect posture. Jon stands next to her, eyes flickering from one messily shuffled file to another. His hands are fidgeting, as if he's restraining himself from righting the nearest precarious pile of books. The corner of his mouth flinches down into a scowl before forcing a very false grin]

Jon: It's time for everyone's favorite segment, Get Crafty with Gertrude! Pay close attention, children, so you can tell me what you learned from Gertrude later!

[He stomps off set, muttering something about organization and the value of a clean work space, and for god's sake isn't there a sensible reference system she could be using?? Gertrude's expression does not change but there is a vague air of amusement for a split second before her stern gaze turns back to the camera.]

Gertrude: welcome once again children. do you ever feel like you're being watched? Perhaps you are playing with your toys and you notice out of the corner of your eye the character on the cover of your favorite story book are staring straight at you? Or perhaps you're in your living room with all the family photos on the wall and the eyes of the people you love seem to follow you around the room no matter where you go? But of course, you say to yourself, it's just a book, a photo; it's a coincidence, a trick of the light, that makes you think that

[a quiet ominous pause. the lighting seems to change, throwing her features in stark contrast.]

Gertrude, voice low: This is untrue. Do not lie to yourself. Lies can get you killed. Remember, they are always watching.

[another pause, heavy and thick. then the lighting brightens somewhat. gertrude's features no longer carry the threatening aura displayed moments ago.]

Gertrude: But we can fix that! for today's activity, you'll need a cutting mat, an x-acto knife, and very steady hands [she chuckles]. Pick out a book or picture that has eyes on it. We are going to learn how to remove them so they won't see what you do when you think no one is watching.

[Gertrude pulls out a photo to demonstrate. It features a man with a patronizing smile and eyes that don't quite mesh with the rest of his face. The camera zooms in to focus on her hands as she positions the photo on the cutting mat]

Gertrude, whipping out a knife: Now, you must be sure your knife is as sharp as possible so that--

[an interruption off scene. it sounds like martin but the insistent whispers are hard to make out. Gertrude seems to hear them fine and frowns.]

Gertrude: That's not practical. Adults are not always around and getting rid of all-seeing eyes is significantly more urgent.

[the insistent whispers continue. Gertrude's frown turns into a scowl to rival Jon's.]

Gertrude: If the children can't handle an x-acto knife on their own, they will likely not survive one of the entities and this segment won't matter.

[the whispers get sharp and rise in pitch. Gertrude glares for a moment before heaving a very put-upon sigh.]

Gertrude: For legal reasons, I must ask that you only do this when you have a parent or trusted adult nearby to supervise. I suppose as long as you're within hearing distance, it's fine. if you cut off a finger, they'll be able to hear you scream and come to your aid. although I hardly think losing a pinky is cause for that much concern so long as you staunch the bleeding.

[A muffled shout of frustration is heard. "You completely invalidated the statement!! Safety is important, why does no one understand that safety is important??" It is definitely Martin.]

Bonus behind the scenes content

[Jon and Gertrude are arguing vehemently about how to best keep an archive neat. Gertrude maintains an aloof air while Jon steadily gets louder and more irate.

[One of the studio's alley cats roams in and both Gertrude and Jon stop their conversation to simultaneously attempt to pet the cat. Jon throws a surprised glance at Gertrude, who remains cool and collected even as she strokes the cat.]

Jon, shyly: ...you like cats? [his gaze is firmly on the gray tabby as he rubs his knuckles under the cat's chin]

Gertrude, matter of factly: Yes. I heard you Beheld some delinquents who were harassing the Commodore here.

Jon: I did. The Commodore and the others don't deserve that sort of treatment. They've done nothing wrong ever in their lives.

Gertrude: yes, i Know. That's why i love them. I can excuse killing archival assistants but I draw the line at hurting the cats.

Jon, enthused: Yes, cats really are amazing creatures and--wait. you can excuse killing archival assistants??

[the tension ratchets back up. the Commodore senses this and stalks out as jon and gertrude have a stare down, still crouched where they had been petting the cat. Glowing green eyes suddenly blink open to halo Jon's head. Gertrude's own eyes narrow, mouth a firm line.]

Jon, voice deep with power: Ceaseless Watcher, see this unworthy servant--

Gertrude, voice like granite: Young man, don't you dare--

[The compulsion in her words makes Jon stutter but does not stop him. The room starts to tremble beneath the pressure of the sudden power spike between the two avatars]

Stagehand 1: *expletive* not again. we just rebuilt the set!

Stagehand 2: Someone get Martin in here now. And bring Gerry's book!

Stagehand 1: And maybe one of the cats.

[Several members of the team scurry to carry out orders, panic clear on their faces. The last thing we see is Martin skidding into the scene, hurriedly reading from a tome and a ghostly outline starting to emanate from it. Scene cuts to black.]

#the magnus archives #tma #jon's creeping terror fun fact corner #jonathan sims #gertrude robinson #in case it wasn't obvious #good old gertrude was getting ready to slice out elias's eyes #she and jon bond over cats later on and actually grow to respect each other as long as entity politics aren't brought up #gerry is gertrude's only soft spot (well aside from the cats) and he's gotten very good at cajoling her to tolerate jon's sensitive nature #trensu tells stories #lemonisinplay

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trensu · 3 years

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The Desolation episode of Jon’s show shows Jon burning a Leitner, along with an explanation of what Leitners are. “Be sure to check an unfamiliar book’s bookplate before reading it, kids!”

Desolation Episode

Jon: and if you ever meet an avatar of the Desolation, do NOT shake hands with them. [He absently flexes his right hand] Ideally you wouldn't meet any of those avatars but if you do encounter them, physical contact MUST be avoided.

[A beat passes in which he keeps unconsciously flexing his hand as he gazes vacantly to the side. The moment passes and he looks into the camera cheerily]

Jon: there is ONE thing the desolation is good for!

[The camera zooms out to reveal a metal waste paper basket at his side. From seemingly nowhere he pulls out what appears to be a children's book in his left hand and a lighter with a web design in his right. His grin is just a little too wide and a little too cheery.]

Jon: Book burning!

Sasha, from off-screen: Jon, NO!

Jon: Jon yes!

[Sasha dashes into view, tackling Jon to the ground. We see Jon go down with a yelp and the lighter go flying before the scene cuts to black. We come back to see a significantly more rumpled Jon holding both items and hurriedly righting the metal basket. We see the same woman off to the side just barely on-screen, impatiently tapping her foot]

Jon: Apologies for the interruption, children. It seems i had forgotten to provide details that I have been helpfully reminded [a slight glare is thrown towards Sasha] are very important in regards to book burning.

[We are shown a close up look of the book's cover. It reads "A Guest for Mr. Spider." A scarred hand flips the cover open and we see the bookplate "From the Library of Jurgen Leitner."]

Jon: Books are an excellent source of knowledge and should be treated with respect. HOWEVER, if you see this bookplate, burn the book with EXTREME prejudice.

[We hear Martin from off-screen hiss something unintelligible. Jon rolls his eyes]

Jon: Yes, yes, Martin i know. Children make sure to do this only when a parent or trusted adult is around to supervise! [An exasperated huff] Why we should put off burning a Leitner is beyond me but apparently I'm legally required to say that.

[With that, Jon gleefully slams the book into the basket and sets it ablaze. His gaze is riveted to the burning book.]

Jon: Until the next episode, kids! [Under his breath] take that you piece of shit spider.

(later, Sasha rubs the bridge of her nose with a sigh: I'll speak to the producers and writing team. I think we'll need to have an episode dedicated to Leitners.

Martin, with a wince as he watches Jon enthusiastically adding lighter fluid to the blaze: Yeah. Yeah, that's probably a good idea. I don't think we'd get away with advocating book burning otherwise.)

#trensu replies #trensu tells stories #tma #the magnus archives #jonathan sims #sasha james #martin blackwood #jon's creeping terror fun fact corner #anon #anonymous #thank you for the wonderful ask anon #it was VERY inspiring #😆😆😆😆😆#i find that im really enjoying writing unhinged children's show host Jon #not heard here #the book definitely screamed when it was set on fire #it was edited out

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trensu · 3 years

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The End episode: Oliver Banks shows up as a guest. The camera pans over to Martin, who is glaring daggers at Oliver.

The Terminus Episode

Jon: This gentleman is Oliver Banks. Say hello, kids! So Mr. Banks--

Oliver, being unfairly handsome: Jon, please. Call me Oliver.

Jon, flusters: ah, y-yes. Er, Oliver, as an Avatar of Terminus, i understand you get portentous dreams? That seems interesting!

Oliver: Not as much as you would think. Mostly I dream of people being dead. [shrugs] They don't do much once they're dead.

[One of the kids in the audience raises their hand. Jon catches the kid's eye and gestures at him]

Jon: You have a question for Mr. Banks?

Child 1: Yes! Mr. Banks, when do people die?

Oliver: [smiles serenely at the child] For most people, it's a mystery. Some die when they're very old, some very young. Some of you will die in beds or cars or at your desks as depressed office workers. It could happen at any time.

Child 2: But I don't want to die soon!

Oliver: Death is a natural progression of life as much as birth. [he looks at Child 2 and gives them a comforting smile.] Try not to let the ending take away from the time remaining. You have many years ahead of you.

[Oliver looks back at Child 1 and pauses awkwardly.]

Oliver: You, not so much. You may want to get your affairs in order.

[Oliver tries to smile away the uncomfortable moment as Child 1 bursts into sobs. It doesn't work. Martin is seen stomping into the scene and manhandles Oliver off the set as Jon tries to calm the audience. The episode ends abruptly.]

(Martin, looming over Oliver: You can't just tell children they're going to die!!

[Oliver shuffles back halfway behind Jon, who's looking Tired. His hand twists on Jon's sleeve. Martin's scowl deepens.]

Jon: To be fair, we tell them things out there want to kill them all the time

Oliver: Er, yeah, how's this any different?

Martin, shrill: IT'S VERY DIFFERENT!! HOW CAN YOU NOT TELL HOW VERY DIFFERENT IT IS? [he yanks Oliver off of Jon] And quit touching Jon!! He doesn't like it!!! You've been doing it this whole time!! STOP.

[Oliver looks at Jon, who nods awkwardly. Oliver nods amicably back and disentangles himself from Martin's grip. There's a good space between him and the other two men now.]

Martin: Your disregard for personal boundaries and, and the sensibilities of children is--it's despicable! You're banned! You're not allowed back on set. Ever!

Jon: Martin? That seems a little--are you okay? I mean, he didn't know and you're not normally so--

Martin, fuming: I'M FINE!

Jon:...right, okay. Well, Oliver, thank you for being here today.

[Oliver eyes Martin cautiously before reaching out to shake Jon's hand. He stops halfway and sticks his hands in his pockets instead. Jon gives him a small relieved smile.]

Oliver: Thank you for having me. Are we still on for drinks later? I promise I'll keep my hands to myself.

Jon: Y-yes, of course

[Jon walks him out. Martin is heard choking out "Drinks?!" as they leave. He repeats the question when Jon returns.]

Jon, shrugs shyly: Georgie says I should make more friends and...and he was nice to me. Wasn't he? Or at least he's not tried to kill me. And he smiles a lot. Like you do. So I thought--

[Martin visibly deflates the longer Jon rambles nervously. He looks at Jon with a mix of sadness and fondness and just a hint of lingering irritation. He sighs, cutting off Jon.]

Martin: No, you're right. I just--it's fine. I'm sure he'll make a good friend [Martin blushes when Jon beams at him]

Tim, gleefully in the background: We're gonna get so much hate-mail for this episode.)

Thanks to @lemonisinplay for coming up with half of this installment. You have the BEST sense of humor XD

#tma #the magnus archives #jonathan sims #oliver banks #martin blackwood #jon's creeping terror fun fact corner #trensu replies #trensu tells stories #just so you know #jon and oliver do go for drinks later #oliver: is martin single?#jon: what??#oliver: he's cute when he's angry. and he's so tall. and strong. he pulled me around like i weighed nothing!#jon suddenly does not like oliver at all #he scowls at his drink completely missing the playful smile on oliver's lips #oliver: i suppose i shouldn't bother tho. with the way he looks at you i don't stand a chance #jon chokes on his drink: WHAT??#jonmartin

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trensu · 3 years

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Awww, I’m glad that Jon gets a slice of cat heaven in this AU! I don’t know if Gerry is alive in this AU, but if he is, what if he shows up in the Beholding episode? (Jolias tries to barge in into the episode, but quickly gets kicked out).

I'm thinking Gerry is in the Leitner Episode tbh. Possibly in book form. Idk yet. But Elias definitely tries to barge into the Beholding episode. He forgot to take into account the fact that literally everybody hates him.

Elias: Hello, everyone! I thought I'd offer my experience and knowledge to this epi-

[Melanie roars into the scene holding a knife. Elias staggers back with a yelp]

Melanie: get back here you cowardly bastard!!

Elias: Jon, control your crew! gET THIS MADWOMAN AWAY FROM ME!!

Jon, leaning cheerfully on a set piece: Can't. The Eye told me not to. In fact, the Eye told me Daisy should also get involved!

[Daisy whooshes past him as he says this, her teeth bared and sharp. Elias screams. Jon grins.]

Jon: we can't deny our master. Isn't that right, Jonah?

Elias, desperate: Martin! Martin, Jon will get in trouble if you let this happen! You don't want Jon to lose his show, do you?

Martin: what's that, Elias? I can't hear you over all the shouting.

[A fog rolls in suddenly. It envelopes Elias and takes him away as it dissipates. Daisy and Melanie are left tussling together for a split second before they realize their victim/prey is gone. They snarl simultaneously]

Daisy: god FUCKING damn it!

Melanie: that fucking arsehole got away!!

Jon: why does Peter-fucking-Lukas have to ruin everything all the time??

Martin: Maybe i could go into the Lonely and--

Jon: NO! I-I mean, no. That's not necessary. We'll have other chances later.

Martin, playfully: what, did the Eye tell you that too?

Jon, keeping a very straight face: Yes. Beholding and I have a special bond and it tells me these things.

[A pause before Martin dissolves into full-bodied laughter. Jon watches him, utterly entranced. Daisy knocks her shoulder into his as she walks back to her post and mutters 'get it together sims' with a sly grin. Jon reddens and fixes his gaze to the ground. This episode never airs due to excessive swearing but the footage is found and circulated on the internet anyway.)

#tma #the magnus archives #jonathan sims #elias bouchard #jonah magnus #melanie king #daisy tonner #martin blackwood #jon's creeping terror fun fact corner #trensu replies #trensu tells stories #anon #anonymous #jon should be allowed a little brutal pipe murder as a treat #but daisy and melanie are far more aggressive than he is so they always get to have fun and be Violent before he can get the chance #jon sulkily: i can be brutal and violent too!!#martin patting his hand comfortingly: im sure you can Jon #jonmartin

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trensu · 3 years

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The Desolation episode is considered one of the more controversial episodes. You have a bunch of people who were either victims of Leitners or had lost loved ones to Leitners sending in complimentary letters. But then, there’s also an avalanche of angry letters from parents complaining about the book burning and how their little ones have either tried or have been begging to burn books.

Lbr, all the episodes of this show are controversial. Parents hate Jon! The man is obviously mad!! Why are they letting him influence impressionable young minds??!?

Jon is mostly unaware tbh. Like, his default is to assume people hate him so he doesn't bother with the details as to why he's getting haters this time around. Tim's actually the one in charge of the fanmail and PR in general. Tim knows the details and he loves it! He's got the BEST job. The fanmail is hilarious!! There was one that came from some crazy vegan accusing Jon of promoting animal cruelty and satanism bc of the Flesh episode. It was absolutely ridiculous; everyone knows Satan isn't real!! Tim laughed so hard, he cried.

And obviously this vegan didn't see Jon Behold that group of teenagers he caught terrorizing one of the alley cats near the studio. Jon is very fond of those alley cats. They follow him around and he gives each of them scritches every day. (Tim suspects he's building a cat army.) And this is how he came up with a wonderful publicity stunt.

Adverts pop up encouraging people to turn in any suspected Leitner books. Books that are confirmed not to be Leitners get donated to local libraries. Once enough Leitners get collected, they sell tickets for a Leitner burning show hosted by Jon. Proceeds are split between reading programs and cat shelters. Tim even arranges a joint reading program where kids can come read to the cats at these shelters. This helps the shy kids improve on their literacy AND it helps socialize the cats to make them more adoptable! Everyone wins!!

#jon's creeping terror fun fact corner #tma #the magnus archives #tim stoker #jonathan sims #trensu replies #trensu tells stories #obviously jon was all for this #he spent SO MUCH time at various cat shelters #it was heavenly #he cuddled every cat that let him and admired from a distance every cat that didn't

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trensu · 3 years

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No worries, and thanks for the response! I’m just imagining a bunch of people who HAD run-ins with Leitners, watching that episode and cheering. Gerry won a lot of fans that day! Tim and Jon make sure to read him all his fan mail.

oh man, you don't even KNOW, anon.

Tim has an absolute blast combing through all their hate fan mail for that episode. He finds it a bit inconvenient that they're only able to receive letters? Every time they try using email or any social media, the system crashes. But spending the day sorting through the letters they receive is, like, his MOST favorite thing to do. There's just something morbidly hilarious about people losing their minds over things that don't even matter, y'know? Being exposed to the literal embodiment of various Fears really puts life in perspective so the stuff all these people get offended by is really truly ridiculous.

And while organizing all this, he starts seeing letters addressed to Gerry-Ghost. A handful are written in a messy child's scrawl. Skimming through those makes something in Tim's chest twist in muted agony. Apparently Mr. Spider wasn't the only children's book out there hurting kids. He makes sure to hand off those letters to Daisy to ha, hunt down those books. He doesn't tell Gerry about those.

The other letters, however, are marginally less painful to read. They come from adults; surprisingly there was a 50/50 split as to whether those adults had children or not. But they all were full of grief and gratitude. Tim gathers all those in a box and sends them over to Jon. Jon's got a better voice for read-alouds than he does.

Dear Gerry-Ghost,

I don't know if that's your real name, but it's the only one I know you by. I feel kind of stupid writing to you. I'm too old to be watching kids shows, probably, but sometimes the world's too much, too complicated, and watching cartoons and kid shows is a good way to unwind. They're simple. They're colorful. And they tell good stories a lot of the time.

Sorry, I'm rambling. You don't need to know about my embarrassing television habits. I'm writing because I wanted to thank you. I wanted to thank you because now I know I'm not crazy. I'm traumatized, sure but I didn't imagine the book that took my little sister.

My little sister was a nerd; she'd read anything she could get herhands on. And she was a smart nerd. I knew she'd be going places. My parents and I worked hard to make sure she could go to uni. She wanted to study space. He was really into sci-fi; i'd almost be embarrassed for her if it weren't for how happy going to those geeky conventions made her.

Near the end of her second year at uni, she found a book at one of those conventions. She was so excited about it. She went on and on about it when she called me, but she put off reading it until she came back home. She wanted to share it with me, even though I, as her elder sibling, fulfilled my duty of teasing her mercilessly about it.

I should've read the book. Growing up, it was my job to make sure the stuff she read was age-appropriate since our parents couldn't read English. Sure, she was an adult now but I should've read that book first. It didn't feel right. When she showed it to me, the book just didn't feel right. And I ignored that to make fun of her for losing it over an old battered paperback with bad old-timey sci-fi art on the cover.

I don't want to say what happened to her. I don't like thinking about how I found what was left of her. I don't want to remember how the book was afterward; how the cheesy sci-fi creature on the cover was distorted in a scream of agony and looked devastatingly like my sister. My little sister's face was never meant to look like that. My sister's face was made for smiling, but I can barely remember hersmile now. All I ever see is that scream.

I don't know what happened to the book. It disappeared after it finished breaking my family to pieces. My parents and I haven't spoken much since I tried to tell them what happened. They still don't believe me. This letter got away from me. I didn't mean to spill all that out. I'm not big on sharing, normally.

I just needed you to know how grateful I am to you. Even if you didn't burn that book (it wasn't at the Leitner Burning I hope maybe it was one you found in your journeys. You don't need to tell me if it was. Or wasn't. I don't think I really want to know. This way I can still hope) at least now I know for sure that I didn't make all that up.

You saved so many lives with every Leitner you burned. The world is a better place for having had you.

I'm sorry you're stuck in a book.

I wish you could've met my little sister.

Sincerely,

Sol Carrera

Jon folds up the letter. Gerry's book is next to him, open to Gerry's page. Gerry stares at the box full of letters. Jon pretends not to notice. When Gerry speaks, his voice is soft and cracks slightly at the end.

"...they're all like that?"

Jon nods. "More or less. That's not all of them either. These are just the ones that Tim confirmed were about Leitners that have already been secured or destroyed. He gave the others to Daisy. You know she needs to feed, and the more Leitners we have..."

"The less there are out there. Yeah."

"Yeah." A quiet moment passes before Jon tentatively asks, "Do you want to hear another one?"

"I think so," Gerry says. A teasing smile appears. "But I want Martin to read it to me. He's got a better voice for this."

"Excuse me? I have a great voice! My job is literally talking," Jon says.

"Are you saying Martin doesn't have a good voice?" Gerry hums thoughtfully. Jon flushes, eyes darting around nervously.

"N-No! Martin has a lovely voice. He, he always sounds so sweet a-and soft. I mean, well, the children love it when he reads to them, and--!" Jon stutters to a stop when he catches Gerry's expression. Jon scowls. "Oh, you're absolutely awful. You don't deserve these letters. I'm going to burn them."

Gerry laughs. "No, no, I take it back. You have the best voice, please read me another."

Jon huffs exasperatedly but gamely reaches for another letter.

Dear Gerry-Ghost,

Thank you for burning that book...

#trensu replies #anon #anonymous #tma #the magnus archives #jonathan sims #gerry keay #timothy stoker #jon's creeping terror fun fact corner #that got a little more serious than i intended #oh well #i made it silly again near the end so that should make up for it right? lol

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