bringing people to Christianity
God placed this on my heart so I want to share:
When I was younger I first became a Christian because I didn't want to go to hell. My faith was purely based on not wanting to go to hell so I would try hard not to sin that way I would go to heaven. However, that is such a watered-down version of why we should have faith. As I grew older I felt God was calling me to reexamine my faith and become close to Him. Over the past 2ish years I have grown so much because instead of being Christian simply to not go to hell my faith was built on my relationship with God. He is the friend, parent, and just love that I have always searched for and wanted. He is the true embodiment of love. If you are wondering why you should be a Christian it is because at your lowest moments, where you feel most broken, underserving, lost, etc. the answer is Christ. HE LOVES YOU, not in a cheesy way but in a way where he died for you to save you from yourself. He wants to show you His love, and he provides peace. It is in a relationship with Him that even though I worry, and feel burdened, I can still have peace because of his presence in my life.
I just pray that anyone reading this accepts Jesus Lord and seeks a relationship with Him. I pray they do not get caught up in the "aesthetics" and try to be "that Christian girl" or the perfect person so that they don't go to hell, but instead I pray they seek you so that they can feel your love so that they can feel your breath of life into their own lungs. I pray that all who read this find you, so that they can encounter the peace, and love I have in following and getting closer to you. Jesus is what you have been seeking. Amen.
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Ramble about God because why not
This has nothing to with Supernatural, but I don’t really care. Because I just feel really moved by this and have for the longest time.
For several years, I’ve struggled with wondering whether or not God was real. I questioned him so many times, all because I’ve continuously lost so much. My faith was so broken, and because of this I ended up falling into sin so many times.
Now, I’m doing all that I can to get closer to him. I’m trying to, anyway. There are still moments where I wonder if he’s even there, there are still moments where I wonder if he’s actually listening. I’ve fallen asleep crying a whole bunch as of lately, with a broken heart. I always feel so empty inside by the end of the night. And every single time I question this, I feel horrible. I don’t want to continue questioning whether or not God is real, nor do I want to continue questioning whether or not Jesus is real.
These last few months have really changed my beliefs, I know that they’re real now.
And for those of you questioning whether or not they’re real, let me tell you about the amount of times I’ve pulled my car into the church parking lot late at night just to talk to him, and to talk to Jesus. Let me tell you about the amount of times I went out onto my back deck late at night just to talk to him, and to talk to Jesus. You may not see them, but boy oh boy, how you can feel them.
When you get that tingling sensation down your spine, and goosebumps all along your arms.. When you feel all warm and fuzzy not only on the outside, but on the inside, too. That’s how you know. They’re with you.
There are many times where you are going to feel like your life is absolutely falling apart, and you feel as though you have no one to talk to.. Believe me, you do. And no, you don’t have to get on your knees to pray in order to talk to them.
You can talk to them like they’re sitting right beside you. You can talk to them like they’re in the car with you, at a restaurant with you, an arcade, or at a movie. You can just talk to them like they’re your best friend, because that’s who they are.
They are your best friends.
They are the ones who, at the end of the day, are cheering you on for all the good things that you do when you feel like nobody cares. They are the ones you can count on for absolutely anything.
You can never trust another human being with your life, but you can trust them.
I learned this yesterday.. March 4th, 2023.
When I felt like I couldn’t trust anybody, that’s when I realized they were still there. Through thick and thin. I know that they love and care for me like nobody else, and I know that I can trust them with absolutely anything. They are there.
But what I’ve learned is that you have to be willing to give your love back to both of them. Your relationship with them should never be one sided. They want you to obey God’s commandments, they want you to be faithful. They will never stray from relationships with us, because that’s just not who they are, nor who they ever will be. They stay, they’re loyal. They're so so loyal, and they’re patient, and they’re forgiving.
They will forgive you for any mistake you make, for any sin you may fall into. But you’ve gotta do your best to not fall into that sin again. If you’re sorry for the mistakes you make? Prove it. Say better. Do better. Be better.
Allow God to continue to build you up, allow him into your life. I know it’s hard to believe in something you can’t see, but trust in the fact he’s real. There have been countless miracles in my life that have led me to believe in him, that have led me to let him in. And I’m beginning to realize now that that's the only guarantee of a happy life.. If you just let him in.
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Whom my soul loves
I caught a glimpse of you and I’m in complete reverence of you.
You're perfect but who am I?
I was too broken, too lost, too sad
In my defeat and shame I built up a wall, isolating myself from the one thing that can bring me happiness.
But you beckoned me from the other side.
You peaked through the cracks, pursued me, and called to me,
"Arise, my love, my beautiful one."
You call me out of my darkness into dancing, rejoicing, and intimacy.
When you look at me you don't see my flaws. You see a lily among shrubs, a jewel among rocks, a dove among crows.
My heart will burn for you forever.
I am my beloved's, and his desire is for me.
I am a seal upon his heart and a seal upon his arm.
My beloved is mine, and I am his.
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