jenny zhang, in an interview with thora siemsen
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girlhood calcifying into this bruised adulthood.
nothing new, taylor swift // @seravph // drop kick aria, sally wen mao // the unabridged journals of sylvia plath // sugar, spice and everything nice, d.s. // girlhood, stevie edwards // jenny zhang // would've could've should've, taylor swift // churching, kristin chang // @nipplering // taylor swift // seven, taylor swift // girlhood is godhood, mimi evangeline @tenderfaery // everything is illuminated, jonathan safran foer
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[on girlhood and those who disrupt it]
give me back my girlhood, it was mine first, me // Sassy, December 1993 // Tell the Wolves I’m Home, Carol Rifka Brunt // Juno (2007) dir. Jason Reitman // Would’ve, Could’ve, Should’ve, Taylor Swift // Untitled (from the Potlatch Series), unknown artist // Sour Girl, Jenny Zhang // No te necesito, Iurhi Peña // unknown artist
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Zhang Jiani
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Q: I was re-reading your essay “How it Feels,” and there’s the part where you write, “Maybe it’s humiliating to attempt anything.” How do you move past that feeling, which could prevent someone from putting work out there in the first place?
A: I think the main thing is to let go of the idea of greatness. Wanting to be great is really limiting. Wanting to be great, wanting to be perfect, wanting to wow and to stun and to dazzle—letting go of that is the most important thing.
You have to both be incredibly willing to be humbled and also, at the same time, hold an incredible high level of delusion. The high level of delusion is what allows you to keep writing and to want to share it with the world. But you also have to accept that it might not mean anything to other people, or that you might be writing so esoterically or so privately that other people have no way of entering into your ideas.
Jenny Zhang
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Clawing into reality With the desire to detach fogging my consciousness…
Its is harder than its believed to be and I have my broken nails to confirm that.
Tonight it felt more like gnawing on an invisible leash.
So i placed my hand On my own chest.
defatted, i let the heat beneath it still it to numbness.
A stronger power placed the taste of weathering on the tip of my tongue and in a reciprocating motion i moved my hand searching for a way to reach it only to touch the radiant abyss that is swelling inside me
It induced tingles on my fingertips.
And like magic I raised it to my eyelids placing heaviness on top of them
playing a trick that made them panic and believe in the darkness as an only option.
Still and all, choosing to drift off and away far from the nightmare of reality
Seemed like the only way to survive and fall into a dreamless land
With only broken nails and the guilt of white lies
to hold on as a casualty.
•••
• Quotes: Heather Havrilesky/ Molly McCully Brown/ Warsan Shire/ Virginia Woolf/ Jenny Zhang/ Mary Oliver/ Albert Camus.
•Original context: Sinligh
•Art reference:
1. Laura Makabresku And Death In A Magical Land. 2. Witold Pruszkowski, Falling star, 1884. 3. Harpy, an art print by Betty Jiang. 4. Art by Adolf Hiremy-Hirschl.
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“I think the main thing is to let go of the idea of greatness. Wanting to be great is really limiting. Wanting to be great, wanting to be perfect, wanting to wow and to stun and to dazzle—letting go of that is the most important thing….
Everyone is constantly trying to articulate the secret languages in their head to the outside world. If your language is too secret, then no one can understand; if your language is completely public, then there’s no mystery. There’s no longer the pleasure of decoding.”
— Jenny Zhang
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Sour Heart is a collection of short stories that portray the experiences of several Chinese immigrant families in the United States. From my point of view, Jenny Zhang made an exquisite choice of title, because throughout the book, the stories have sour, jaw-locking undertones.
The first tale is told from the perspective of a child who has been dragged into all that confusion without having choice. Christina tells about the different precarious properties she has lived in, about hunger, about the illicit ways her parents found to survive in the country of freedom. The girl presents the apartment they shared with about 10 other people, all sleeping together in the living room and that is the thread that connects all the other stories: all the stories in the book involve people who passed through this apartment. There are passages from other characters who mention Christina, without even having to use her name.
Although I found all this genius, still the violence and cruelty described in the book made me uncomfortable, not giving me such a good experience; but overall, an incredible book that helps us understand the reality of immigrants in the United States, described by someone who has been in this situation.
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AUTHOR FEATURE:
﹒Jenny Zhang﹒
Four Books Written By this Author:
Sour Heart
My Baby First Birthday
Dear Jenny, We Are All Find
Hags
___
Happy reading!
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Sour Hearts, by Jenny Zhang, and orange spice tea. This book is a bruiser.
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