#javier

[tentakel]

javier n boaz, love em

#javier #javier escuella #rdr2 #rdr2 fanart #red dead redemption 2 #art

[tieronecrush]

office party

javier peña x f!reader

summary: your friend with benefits, javier, is your plus one for your dreaded office holiday party. when a coworker gets a bit too comfortable, javier steps in and shows you exactly how he feels about you.

rating: M

wc: 2.3k

warnings: alcohol use, mentions of sex, inappropriate advances from coworker, fwb, probably missing some so lmk what!!

a/n: my contribution to @pedrostories secret santa event!! was a busy holiday season so i wish i could have done more but excited to participate nonetheless. i hope you enjoy @flightlessangelwings and happy holidays to you!!! and tysm my love @northernbluess for proofing

dividers by @saradika

“Christ, where is he? Gettin’ freezing out here…” you mumble to yourself, gritted through your teeth as you stand shivering in your party attire — a tasteful black velvet cocktail dress, hem stopping a couple of inches above your knees and long sleeves with a sweetheart neckline. Fidgeting with your charm necklace, you nervously scan the entrance stairs to the history museum for the familiar face.

It’s the night before your office lets out for the holidays, and it’s also the night they host their annual holiday party. Even though it was quite the affair and your large law firm spares no expense for the event, you never really looked forward to being confronted with colleagues in ways you didn’t need to see them, and there was usually one man who would hit on you. Open bar, catered food, always in a gorgeous venue, it was a recipe for a great time or a horrible time, depending on your found company for the night. This year was the history museum, one of your favorite spots in the city. The daydreams you’ve had about taking him here pop into your mind like a flash in the pan — fleeting, and simply something to stay as a daydream.

A tinge of reluctance tugs in your gut. Was it weird to ask him here? Is he going to stand you up?

But then, there was Javier. Looking sharp as ever in a suit, one you’ve seen him in once after he stopped by yours after a late night working. Black, with a crisp white shirt and a red tie to fit into the holiday spirit. A smirk plays on his lips when he spots you, taking the stone steps two at a time as he approaches. It had taken a bit of convincing — virtually bribing — to get him to agree to be your plus one for the night, and when he did confirm that he would come along with you, the prospect of the party actually being something more bearable skyrocketed instead of the excruciating evening you usually expect.

“Hey there, querida. Why’re you waiting out in the cold for me? Debe estar congelándose. (You must be freezing.)” Javier greets you with concern knit into his brow, his big brown eyes softened and sparkling in the low streetlight. His large palms find the sides of your arms, rubbing gently to warm you up.

“Didn’t want to get pulled into the abyss alone in there,” you jest, “I don’t know if you’d have been able to find me with all the hiding I have to do from weird coworkers.”

You laugh and Javier chuckles lightheartedly, shaking his head as he relaxes in front of you. Nodding his head toward the door, he follows behind you as you lead with a hand at your lower back.

“Is there anyone I should watch out for specifically tonight? Am I gonna have to act as a bodyguard? Should I tell any of the creeps I have a gun?” Javier’s lips graze your ear as he speaks, keeping close to you when you enter and the sounds of the party erupt. A jolt runs down your spine from the intimate contact. It’s your turn to shake your head, breathing out a laugh as you limply hit your hand against his chest.

Your excitement around seeing Javier and spending more time with him was getting much more frequent and much more intense. Bordering the point where you don’t know if you can keep up the arrangement with the feelings you’re developing for him.

Friends of a few years, there’s always been a flirty undertone between you and Javier. It built up to the point that when everyone had cleared out from a dinner party at your place, Javier stayed behind to help clean up — always a gentleman — and the two of you, admittedly a bit tipsy from the wine that was flowing all night, told each other one a whim that you were attracted to each other. Both free from any ties of old relationships, you fell into an agreement: sex, great sex at that, with no strings attached. You two would remain friends and get exactly what you wanted, which was each other, without the messiness of a relationship. Something you were both jaded from.

These days, however, the lines were starting to blur on your end. Everything he did seemed to tip you further into the deep end before you finally came to terms and accepted that you had completely cannonballed into it.

Javier is a good guy. Didn’t have that reputation around town when you first met, but getting to know him in the wee hours of the morning after a few rounds, you fell fast and hard. It wasn’t until recently that you came to terms with it.

“Nobody needs the interrogation tactics or intimidation tonight, Peña.”

“Okay, okay…Tengo que asegurarme de que te traten bien. (I have to make sure you’re treated right.) One of their best employees, shouldn’t have to put up with the shit, querida.”

The air in the grand entrance of the city’s museum crackles with holiday cheer as festive decorations adorn every corner. Garland hangs around the banisters of the grand staircase that leads further into the museum, but most of the activity is in the large, marble-lined room you both stand in. Nearly every employee seems to be in attendance, people milling about in cliques and others indulging in drinking or dancing.

As both of you saunter toward the bar, the atmosphere softens with each step, the clinking of glasses and the chatter of coworkers weaving together into a cacophony of merriment. Javier grabs you two drinks, a glass of champagne for you and whiskey neat for him, toasting to the night ahead. The clinking of glasses resonates with your unspoken agreement: tonight, like every other night, would end the same way. No strings.

Amidst the swirl of laughter and twinkling lights, and the loosening power of liquor, the boundary between friendship and something deeper becomes increasingly blurred. Flirty comments dance back and forth, charged with an unspoken tension that lingers beneath the surface.

“You look beautiful tonight, cariño. How come I haven’t seen this dress before?” Javier asks, the two of you standing at a cocktail table, alone and enjoying it.

“Guess you’d have to be my plus one more often, Javi. Then you could see all the dresses in my closet,” you counter, smirking playfully and biting back the desire to mention something akin to a real date for both of you.

“Guess so, querida. Might have to make this a regular thing.” Javier sends you a wink before clinking your glasses together in another smaller toast, a smirk painting his face as he lifts the tumbler to his mouth for a sip.

With every exchanged glance and teasing remark, it’s evident that you’re tiptoeing on the edge of uncharted territory, yearning to express feelings that had long been confined. It’s unclear if Javier feels the same, but soft touches and gentle words ply you open even further, teetering with falling completely.

Then, amidst the dance of emotions and flirtations, a coworker appears in the corner of your eye, sauntering toward the table and bursting the privacy bubble that you happily curated with Javier. His name’s Jake, a man around your age who is friendly with you in the office, sociable guy with one of those “winning” personalities the partners would compliment endlessly. A guy’s guy. But one that had no problem approaching the women in the office. With a warm smile, he extends a hand towards the man at your side, introducing himself with an easy charm that seemed almost too perfect — of course, referring to Javier already as his ‘buddy’. The hint of jealousy that flickers across Javier's face doesn’t escape your notice, and you can’t help but feel a tingle of endearment for his slightly soured mood from being interrupted.

As the night progresses, Jake's alcohol-infused attempt at camaraderie with you grows increasingly unwelcome. He’d been watching you like a hawk so far, cutting in whenever Javier left to grab more drinks or when another coworker pulled his attention away to try to pick his brain about all that’s happening in the government right now. Inching closer to you, Jake leans against the hightop table, making conversation with slurred words and uninhibited want behind his eyes.

When you shift slightly away, attempting to remain civil enough at a work event, you feel yourself bump into Javier. 

At that moment, Javier turns to see if you tapped him to grab his attention, but is met with the clear look of discomfort on your face. Jake leaning in closer, eyes wandering as you responded in the conversation, clearly attempting to check you out. Frustration toward the man in front of you lit in his chest, holding himself back from confronting him and instead fully embracing his purpose for the night. If he was invited as your date, he could act like it, right?

His arm wraps around you possessively, his lips pressing kisses on your temple, and whispered words meant to keep you close. Surprised at first, but happy to feel closer to him and to relish in the protective boyfriend persona, even if it is only to keep a creep away from you.

Jake, seemingly oblivious to the change in dynamics, spoke up louder, laying a hand on your arm and squeezing, “So you ever wanna cut out of work early and get a drink? Maybe end up back at my place? You can wear that dress.”

The proposition sends a ripple of discomfort through the air. Other coworkers turn away, ignoring the advance that left you shocked and speechless. But, Javier, now fully immersed in his role, takes a stern tone, cutting in and gently maneuvering you behind him.

“Hey, cabrón, why don’t you apologize for speaking to her like that?” Javier instructs, nodding to you while your hands wrap around his arm closest to you. “Or am I going to have to find one of your supervisors and tell them all this shit myself? Don’t speak to her again, or even look at her. And I will know if you do — I’ve got eyes everywhere, buddy.”

The look on Jake’s face makes you laugh softly from behind Javier, shaking your head as he backs away and leaves with his tail between his legs. Javier turns to you, wrapping you up in one of his arms and brushing his fingers softly against your cheek.

Concern softens his eyes, the same look that he greeted you with when he found you waiting in the cold, “You alright, cariño? Fucking asshole. You shouldn’t have to deal with that, should report him or something.”

“I’m alright, Javi. Thank you…You didn’t have to—”

Javier shakes his head, smiling with one side of his mouth and kissing your forehead, “‘Course I did. Can’t let anyone talk to you like that.”

You lean into his chest and smile, lightening the mood with a playful comment, “Seemed pretty comfortable being threatening. Did it bring you back to the good ol’ days being a sheriff?”

Ever the master of evasion, Javier shrugs it off with a casual demeanor, attempting to maintain the façade of indifference with a nod, “Sure did. But they weren’t the good ol’ days.”

Hearing the smile in his voice causes a wave of affection for him that washes over you, coming to the realization that it’s either now or never. A surge of courage propels you to take the leap, confessing the fact that you see more with Javier, that you want more with him.

“I know we said no strings, and it was like that at first, but the more I’ve gotten to know you, the more I’ve found that I love you. And you can absolutely walk away and nothing will be held against you, but I can’t keep up with this if I can’t tell you how I feel.”

The atmosphere between you shifts, and for a moment, the world seems to stop entirely.

Javier's eyes softened, and with a sincerity that catches you off guard, he shares a confession too, “Querida, I fell in love with you in the first moment I met you. The second I kissed you for the first time was when I realized it. I thought maybe I could keep it all in, ‘cause I didn’t want to lose you as a friend and just as a part of my life, but I love you, cariño. Have since I heard that laugh of yours and saw that gorgeous smile. And I haven’t felt the same way I feel about you for anyone else before.”

In that moment of vulnerability, the boundaries that confined your actions shatter, opening up a door, wide and clear, for you to walk through and never close.

Away from the crowded party, you find yourselves standing in a doorway adorned with sprigs of mistletoe, a symbol of serendipity. Under the soft glow of the festive lights, Javier takes a step closer, and his lips meet yours in a gentle, lingering kiss. His hand caresses your cheek, one arm wrapping around your waist while yours rest around his neck, pulling him in for a deeper kiss.

As you break apart, Javier looks into your eyes, a sincerity shining through that mirrored the twinkle of holiday lights.

"I love you," he confesses, the words hanging in the air like the melody of a cherished carol.

“I love you, too,” you return, a glowing smile and feeling giddy for the rest of the holiday season with Javier.

taglist: @northernbluess @atinylittlepain @swiftispunk @joelsversion @mrsmando @ilovepedro @deathwife @undrthelights @atticrissfinch @casa-boiardi @wannab-urs @ramblers-lets-get-ramblin @fishingforpike @msjarvis @walkintotheriveranddisappear @sugadolly @yazsos @peppesgirl @pastawench @addictedtotlou @brittmb115 @anoverwhelmingdin @spishsstuff @wolfbook87 @mswarriorbabe80 @harriedandharassed @decemberdolly @laiisleitte @fierce-bab @vickie5446 @pertinentpostmortem @livingdeadmaria @sullyosully @bitchwitch1981 @its-nebuleuse @marini03 @piercethevic03 @joeandpedrosimp @kiwisbell @planet-marz1 @txtattoostark @jrosie25 @thereaperisabitch @tbniarq @vee-bees-blog @spidermanfrog @belliezz @joelsflannel @k-k0129 @cartoon-garbage04 @bianqueee04 @nostalxgic

#pedrostoriesgift23 #pedrostories #writing #javier #javier peña fic #javier peña x you #javier peña fanfic #javier peña #javier peña x f!reader #javier peña x reader #javier peña x female reader #javier peña fanfiction #javier pena #javier pena x reader #javier pena x you #javier pena fic #javier pena fanfiction #javier pena fanfic

[intopower]

Themed Collection #35: “Up in the Air”

Franco Exequiel Domínguez, Driton Morina, Josh Watson, Javier, Oussama Sidaoui, Lloyd Stevens

#franco exequiel domínguez #driton morina #josh watson #javier #oussama sidaoui #lloyd stevens #themedcollection

[drinkinggblood]

unfortnaturely loyal.

#rdr2 #red dead redemption 2 #javier #rdr2 javier #javier escuella #rdr2 fanart #rdr2 community #rdr2 art #red dead redemption #rdr2 spoilers #// spoilers #spoilers for guarma chapter #guarma #// spoilers for red dead redemption 2 #art study #my art #uuggh practicing environments + shading in a more natural looking way #javier rdr2

[the-jarvy-party]

THE COWBOY YOU ARE | J. Escuella

javier escuella x f!reader

tags ; smut, cursing, riding a cowboy (iykwim), cowboy hat rule (look it up), afab anatomy , dry humping, p in v, switch!javier, switch!reader, teasing, cockwarming but only for a few seconds

wc ; 749

a/n ; save a horse, ride a cowboy ;) | my first smut on this app, so why not make it my boy javier

if wear the cowboy hat, you gotta ride the cowboy.

“You’re treading on thin ice, princesa” Javier sets his hat down on the table and huffs as he sits down. [ princesa - princess ]

“Is it so bad,” You sit down on his lap, “that i just wanna wear your hat?” Your hand goes to grab it and he swats it away.

“You know what happens when you wear my hat.” He warns you. Of course you knew what happened when you wore his hat, that’s why you wanted to wear it.

“Yes, Javi, I know what happens.” You grind down onto his lap and he swallows down a groan.

“Mierda, oh go-“ Javier bites down on his hand as you continue to grind down on him. The entire camp was either asleep or just in their tents doing stuff. So, you two were pretty safe out here for a bit. [ mierda - shit ]

“Shh, Javi.” You slowly reach for his hat with your right hand. Putting it on your head once you had a secure grip on his hat. “Oops…”

“You did this on pur-“ You grind down on his dick again, stopping him mid sentence. “God.” He whines and bucks his hips up against yours. That was your breaking point.

✭ ✭ ✭

“Javier-“ You manage to moan out his name as he kisses up and down the upper half of your body, leaving your jeans buttoned almost on purpose. You grip onto his hair, ruining the low ponytail he had it in.

“You don’t know what you do to me, especially when you do this.” He stands up, fixing the brim of his hat that was on your head. “I wanna see you ride me like the cowboy you are, since you’re obviously one now.”

You rubbed your thighs together for some friction, anything, to soothe the ache between your thighs.

Javier seemed so dominant until you slowly sat down on his dick, every time you’d grind down he was a whimpering, whining mess. Gripping at your hips, helping you ride him.

“Por favor, te necesito... Necesito esto.” Javiers nails dug into your hips, making you moan a little too loud. [ please i need you… i need this ]

When you both bucked your hips at the same time, it made your vision go white. It practically made you scream out in pleasure.

“Javi,” You throw your head back as you claw at his chest. “God… you’re so-“ You struggled to talk in between moans and whines that would escape every so often.

Javiers hands slowly slid up your body, cupping one of your boobs. His calloused thumb sliding over one of your nipples, making you shiver. “You don’t know how much… I- dios… worship you.” [ dios - god ]

It was true. As his hands went up to your face he flicked the brim of his hat up, exposing more of your face. It was red and had a thin layer of sweat covering it.

“I’m close-“ You struggle to moan out the words, gripping and clawing at Javier’s chest.

“So am I, hermosa. Just… mierda… a little bit longer.” He let’s out an animalistic groan as he looks down and sees where you two were connected. [ hermosa - beautiful | mierda - fuck ]

You eventually dive down and start kissing him once his moans and whines got too loud. He got more aggressive with his thrusts, though they were sloppy it still bucked your body upward.

Javier takes both of his arms and gropes your ass needily, like he was a starving man and you were his first meal.

He dips his left hand down to play with your clit, leaving you a moaning mess. Javier seeing you come undone this fast and this easily made him rut into you.

“Ple- please… I-“ Javier manages to groan out, “Inside…” He started panting, “you… p-please.”

“You can…” You grip onto his shoulder, feeling him thrust one last time into your throbbing cunt until he eventually came.

Javier puts his arms around your waist, pulling you flush against his sweaty body. His face was slightly flushed, and his lips were swollen. He was trying to catch his breath but he had the most intoxicating smile on his face.

“So… how was the ride?” He looks up at you with hooded eyes, obviously trying to joke around.

You roll your eyes, kissing his forehead and pushing the stray hairs off of his forehead before getting up off of him to lay beside him.

#macs multi fandom tag #javier escuella x reader #javier escuella #javier escuella smut #cowboy hat rule #red dead fanfic #red dead smut #riding the cowboy #i am so down bad for javier escuella its not funny #javier #javier smut #red dead redemption community #red dead redemption fanfiction #red dead redemption two #rdr2

[tgedphotos]

Side Story 1 - “Sir Javier Asrahan's Wish”

Prev | Index | Next

#novel image #tged #tged spoilers #lloyd #javier #duo #tged side story

[johnpriceslamb]

Hi! I love your how you write and I wanted to ask if you could do Javier Escuella x middle class reader? Something like Arthur and Mary case…

Thank you <33

𝓴𝓷𝓲𝓰𝓱𝓽 𝓪𝓷𝓭 𝓼𝓱𝓲𝓷𝓲𝓷𝓰 ,

❥ You’ve sent a letter to Javier asking for ‘help’. Just a day later he shows up at your front door.

𝓑𝓔𝓕𝓞𝓡𝓔 𝓨𝓞𝓤 𝓟𝓡𝓞𝓒𝓔𝓔𝓓 ! ꒰ female ! reader . hyper-feminine ! reader . reader is mentioned 2 be physically shorter than characters mentioned below . VERY SUGGESTIVE . No actual NSFW . 1k wrd count. ꒱

❥ Javier Escuella x fem! reader. (MINORS DO NOT INTERACT ?)

“You came.”

The air around is hot. Hot enough to be able to dry the wet laundry which clings on the thin clothesline with a peg. The sun showed no mercy among the people in New Hanover, and it blazes through like a forest-fire. There’s no fire, but you could practically feel the radiating heat from it.

“I did.”

Was Javier a fool to travel all the way from Valentines to Saint Denis in the blazing hot? Perhaps.

For you- was it worth it? Absolutely.

You’re still as pretty as ever despite the arid drought. He wonders how you manage to stay tall and well through this.

He wonders if the tint on your cheeks was from the heat or from seeing him. He hopes it was the latter.

Slowly does he creep forward. Your eyes almost shines and glimmer as he approaches, you feel that giddy part of you rising in your stomach as you watch him carefully.

“Needed help with the.. plumbing, you said?” He has that same charming grin he’s always had when you two first met. It’s always allured you, every time. His hand reaches to his pocket unconsciously, fiddling with the letter which was stuffed messily into the small compartment.

“Uhuh,” You smile, feigning innocence as you tinkered those dewy lashes of yours up at him. Oh, dear.

“Mhm.” He rests his weight by leaning on the door-frame, crossing his arms as he looks down at your demure figure. Gosh did he just want to take you right there, right then.

“Why don’t you, mm.. Show me where the problem is? I’m sure I can fix it.” He suggests with that lustrous smirk of his.

“Right, then. Please follow me.” You smile prettily, plump lips purposefully jutting out just a little bit to get that same effect he had with his smirks and grins.

As you lead him to the bathroom, you don’t notice the hungry stare which was coming from him. Half-lidded eyes size you up and down multiple times as he takes in that corset of yours which defined your waist oh-so prettily. That soft, dainty colours of multiple cream coloured pearls which were connected on a thin string which clasped around your neck, a beauty to behold.

You were nothing like him. Dainty, pure, cladded with luxury only daddy could afford.

As soon as you closed the door to the bathroom, your back was forcefully met with the wooden panels which encased the whole room. A soft gasp escapes your lips, which lead to a string of multiple curse words muttered in a language you weren’t familiar with.

“Dios mios,” He lets out a low growl, mouth near your ear as his hot breath hits your sensitive skin, “Me vuelves loco, ¿lo sabías?” He slams his lips on yours, a knee positioned right between your legs to help stabilise yourself. Your little ballerina flats hover over the ground from his management.

“Making me travel so far to help you with something which never even needed mending in the first place.” He kisses your neck multiple times, “Cheeky girl.”

You needily press your lips against his, leaning into his warm touch. Finally, finally. After so long.

“Missed you,” You babble with a soft whimper, the feeling of his teeth teasingly sinking down just a bit, “Missed you so— Oh..”

You let out the most softest whines as he gently sucks your skin, “J—Javier— Hnn.. Daddy’s right next door..”

“I’ll be quiet, mi amor.” He murmurs, pressing another soft kiss on your neck, “You don’t know the effect you have on me.”

A hand slowly travels down, another coming to cup you from behind. “For now, let me enjoy what i’ve missed.”

#javier escuella x reader #javier escuella #red dead redemption 2 #rdr2 x reader #red dead fandom #rdr2 x you #javier #javier escuella x you #javier escuella x fem reader #rdr2 #rdr2 fanfic #fem! reader #afab! reader #javier escuella x fem you #rdr2 x fem reader #rdr x reader #arthur morgan #arthur morgan x you #arthur morgan x reader #arthur morgan x fem! you #arthur morgan x fem! reader

[jake-g-lockley]

Ok, My Precious (Javier Peña x reader)

Masterlist | Wanna be tagged?

A/N: Get it? Ok Kanmani? @lil-stark asked for a desi fic ages ago and here it is :”)

Warnings: Men can be a little dumb bless their hearts, a little bit of smut, a tiny panic attack and crying other than that, soft fluffy javi <3

Word Count: 1.7k

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

Javi watched as you bopped your head to your music, singing to its catchy rhythm. You were working on an assignment, occasionally looking to the left of your laptop to write something on your notepad. You were absolutely obsessed with this song, singing it over and over again, even singing the ad libs.

En Rojaa Neeya

En Uyire Neeya

En Anjalli Neeya

Geetaanjalli Neeya

Javi loved the way your eyes would light up when you managed to get something right and how your eyebrows crinkled together when you didn't get the answers you needed. He tilted his head and continued to stare unabashedly.

En Kadalil Alai Paayum

Oar Mouna Raagam Needhane

Kaatruveliyidai Ellaam Naam

Iruvar Parandhu Sellathane

Javi leaned against the door frame and watched your lips move as angelic words tumbled out of them. He sighed softly and looked at you dreamily, his safe little haven away from the atrocities of his work. You were wearing one of his baggy tshirts and your fluffy slippers, hair twisted into a bun and a turmeric face mask on your face. 

Javi shifted to cross his legs and you finally noticed him at the door, your eyes widening as your hands come up to shield your face from him.

“Eek, Javi! Don’t look at me!” you squealed, pressing your hands to your face, smudging the mask all over the place. 

Javier laughed, “See mi preciosa, look at the mess you've made.”

He walks to your shared bathroom and comes out a few minutes later with a wet towel. He pulls a chair out beside you and drags your chair towards him so that you are situated between his thighs. He gently pulls your hand away from your face and places them upturned on his lap and begins to wipe your face.

You stare up at his handsome face as he gently rubs the turmeric away from your skin. When he was done with your face, he moved to your hands, kissing each fingertip as he cleaned them with the towel. He pulled you close for a hug when he was finally done, placing a feathery kiss onto your hairline and placing the stained towel aside.

Your heart swells with love and happiness as you snuggle close, your fingers gripping onto Javi’s shirt, your cheek pressed into his exposed skin where his buttons were opened as you felt the soft beat of his heart

“Te amo, roja.” Javi whispers, your heart fluttering with the tamil nickname. 

“Te amo, raja.” You whispered back. 

A message bloops on your laptop, bursting you and Javi’s little bubble and you sigh, sitting up straighter. 

“Go on baby, do your work, I’ll fix you something to eat.” Javi smiles softly at you, kissing your cheek before getting up and taking the towel with him. 

A few minutes later Javi returned, holding a bowl of fruit, a fork and a book. You smiled happily as he began to feed you fruit as he read his book, keeping you company as you softly hummed your favourite song while you worked.

You kissed him softly when you were done with the fruit, making him hum at the sweet taste of juice on your lips. 

He held your hand, playing with your ring as you continued working. The little white gold and diamond ring sparkled in the late evening light and he moved his hand around, making the light refract from it and bounce around the room. The ring was a gift from your mom for your 21st birthday and you never took it off and Javi loved playing with it. 

Javi kissed your finger and gently nibbled at your finger making you hiss slightly. He shifted closer to you, kissing your palm and your wrist, gently sinking his teeth into your skin, a sign that you wouldn’t be doing much work for the rest of the night. 

Still you ignored him and stared hard at your laptop, your free hand clutching your mouse tightly.

“Relax, amor, let me take care of you.” Javi’s lips grazed your ear as you sighed. 

You cave, melting into Javi’s touch as he curled his arm under your legs and lifted you up, carrying you to the bedroom, making you giggle softly into his neck. 

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

Javi always wakes up before you in the morning. He sat up and stared at your sleeping figure, his eyes tracing your curves as they noted the love marks that he had carved throughout the night. Your hand was draped over your tummy, your red nails another reminder of the delicious marks that littered his back.

His eyes stopped at your ring again, the one that sat perfectly at the base of your middle finger. He began to imagine how it would be like to slip on another ring beside the current one. You’d definitely make a beautiful bride and an even more beautiful wife. He suddenly couldn't help but think that your name was written with his in the stars and he had the inexplicable urge to solidify it

You sighed in your sleep and turned around, and Javi leaned down to kiss your shoulder, shaking off his thoughts. He got out of bed when suddenly a nagging voice popped up in his head, urging him to grab your ring.

He frowned and shook his head

“Not steal it, idiot. To get her ring size.” the voice hissed again and his eyes widened

Javi gently dropped to his elbows and eyed your fingers. Before he could stop himself, his own fingers met yours and began to pull the ring from your finger. 

“Oh boy, we’re really doing this.” Javi thought as he gently placed your hand back onto the bed.

“Yes we are, doofus.” his mind voice spoke to him again. “Now run before she wakes up.”

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

You literally couldn't stop bawling your eyes out. You did not only wake up to the fact that Javier had disappeared and gone to work, but your favourite ring was missing. You've had the ring on your finger for about  ten years. It was one of the only things keeping you close to your mother who lives thousands of miles away. You sunk onto the floor after literally turning the entire house upside down, your hands clutched to your heart. 

You fell asleep curled up on the floor in exhaustion and woke up to an alarmed Javier kneeling in front of you.

“Sweetheart, what happened?” his soothing voice only made you want to cry again as he pulled you into a tight hug. 

“My ring…” your voice falters as you begin to sob into Javi’s shirt.

Javier’s eyes widened and guilt immediately rushed around him. He internally face palmed as he subtly felt his pocket for your ring. Instead of pulling it out immediately, he jumped into action, pulling your hand to eye level as if to inspect it. 

“Alright, calm down, breathe, it must be here somewhere, mi preciosa.” Javi whispered through your sobs and gently pulled you up with him. 

“Let's start with the bed, yea?” 

Javier sneakily pulled the ring out of his pocket as you frantically tossed the pillows.

“AHA! I FOUND IT!” Javier shouted and you immediately give yourself whiplash when you looked up at him. 

“Oh thank god!” you jumped onto the bed and threw your arms around Javier’s neck and he subtly breathed a sigh of relief.

“You worked yourself up too much, baby, come on now, let me run you a bath.” Javier said softly as he slipped the ring back onto your finger. 

“Thank you, Javi, I love you.” you sighed , wrapping your arms around his body. 

“That was close,” the grating voice whispered in Javier’s head.

“Shut up.”

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

It had been three months since Javi bought your ring. Every morning he would look at your ring, before shaking his head slightly and putting it back in his hiding spot. It wasn’t like you had anything wrong with you, he just wanted to find the perfect timing. 

Then one day it just clicked. 

It had been a long night for him, and he was exhausted the second he got home. His ears perked at the music that was playing the minute he put his hand on the doorknob. He threw the door open and his eye caught you spinning around, your arms thrown up as an upbeat song played in the background. You turned to look at him, running up to him to pull his bag away from him and he immediately snaked his arm around your waist to dance with you. Music consumed the both of you and Javier immediately forgot about his horrible day.

It was at that moment where he felt like his life without you would probably mean that he would have to live a horrible one alone. You let go of his arms and danced on your own, throwing your head back as he watched your eyes flutter close. 

He didn’t know how he ended up on one knee, the box ready in his hands as he looked up at you. 

Your music stopped and you huffed, stalking over to your laptop. 

“Baby, did we pay the Spotify bill-” you started to say when you noticed what Javier was doing. 

Your mouth dropped open as a soft gasp escaped your lungs. Javier felt so vulnerable in that few minutes, his mind racing as you both stared at each other.

“Marry me, kanmani.” Javier felt the words tumble out of his mouth in one breath. 

You know the moment you look at someone and your whole life with them flashes before your unfocused eyes? That was exactly what was happening to you. Birthdays, first days of school, graduations and anniversaries popped up in front of you as you found yourself living  a dream. 

You closed the distance between the both of you in a flash, wrapping your arms around his neck as one of your hands slid up his curls.

“Oh god, Javi.” you whispered as tears seeped out your eyes. “Yes, I will!” 

A choked sob escaped Javier’s mouth as he breathed a sigh of relief. He pressed his forehead to yours as he took your hand in his, slipping the ring onto your finger. Both of your tear drops mingle onto your hand and you pull away slightly to look at Javier’s beautiful brown eyes. You were positive you saw your whole world in his eyes as he pulled you close for a bruising kiss. 

“You okay, kanmani?” “I’m your kanmani hmm?” you giggle, pressing your nose to his. “Always and forever, en kanmani.”

Taglist: @wolfbook87 @nyotamalfoy @minigirl87 @alexxavicry @bloodredwolfsbane @euphoricosmo @celiaswife @swiggy-needs-mental-help @ryebreadsworld @your-voice-is-mellifluous @lil-stark @absolutelybloodyhopeless @mintpurplemnm @bubblezuku @cookielovesbook-akie @mandoloriancookie @magic-schoolbusdropout @anonymously35 @nerdreader @lucreziazaninelli @milly-louisex @marylovesdilfs 

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[fairies-in-the-garden]

let me help you forget

javier peña x fem!reader | 1.8k words

summary: when javier can't sleep after a rough day at work, you help him get out some of his pent up energy

warnings/notes: explicit (18+). smut. clothed grinding. teasing. oral (m receiving). slight praise kink. established relationship. pretty much just soft filth.

a/n - thank you for all the love on my first post! here is a javi work because he's my fav smut lead. enjoy my fellow delusional queens :)))

--- --- ---

a change in atmosphere startled you softy to wake; the space next to you feeling unusually empty for this time of night. you'd heard javier come home earlier in the night, even cuddled up beside him when he slipped quietly under the covers beside you. his familiar warmth and rich smoky scent now gone.

flicking on the small lamp at your bedside, your eyes adjust to read the clock displaying a time too early to wake up to, and too late to be up past. teetering up out of bed, you follow the glow of the moon shining into the room beyond.

entering the living room, a trail of smoke informs you he's here; your tense shoulders relaxing at the discovery. "javi," you speak softy, voice groggy and coarse. stepping forward you find him lying across the length of the couch, cigarette pressed to his lips.

"cariño," he hums, "what are you doing up?" his expression appears to be one of slight concern, of worry he may have woken you.

"i came to ask you the same thing." you rub your eyes with the back of your palms, rounding the couch to join him. looking to the coffee table you notice his ashtray full, an almost empty glass of whiskey beside it. seems it's been one of those days.

"couldn't sleep," he states plainly, rubbing his temple.

patting his legs, you motion him to make room for you. sitting up, javier offers his side for you to fall sweetly into, arm wrapping firmly around you. your head finds its way nuzzled into his neck, as it always does. his cologne still lingers behind his ear. the ends of his hair curled from sweat and the columbian humidity.

"how was your day?" you ask, already knowing the answer to be a bad one. knowing that his response will be nothing but a groan followed by silence.

"mmm," he sighs, head leaning into yours. taking a drag from his cigarette, he doesn't say another word.

leaning up from his shoulder to look at him, his head falls back against the couch cushion, hand coming up to rub his furrowed brow. the stress of what he does, what he's seen - whatever that may be - is evident in face, in the way he carries himself behind closed doors. everything - all the trauma, all the energy - is stuck within him. you wish you knew the way to help him, to understand him, but your attempts are always tossed aside with frustration. still, you will always try.

"how can i help you?" you ask him, hand rubbing circles on his bare chest.

"stop." he speaks sternly. with eyes still closed, he takes another drag.

"just talk to me. tell me about..." you struggle to find the words, knowing you're stepping into troubled territory, "anything," you plea.

"mierda," he snaps, "just stop. stop fucking prying." you remove your hand from his chest, leaning back to sink into the couch. you look away, not wanting his eyes to find yours. they do.

seeing the look of disappointment, of hurt in your eyes makes him wince. he leans forward, putting out his cigarette, before leaning towards you. his hand rises to cup your cheeks. you try to dodge his touch, but you're unsuccessful.

"querida," his voice is low, and smooth as his whiskey, "i'm so sorry. i shouldn't have snapped at you like that. it's not fair." he rubs his thumb gently across your skin, nearing the corners of your eyes as if in attempt to get you to look at him.

"i just... i can't talk about my days with you. i don't wanna... i can't expose you to all the shit that's bad in the world. it would destroy you." he speaks softy, but his words sting.

huffing, you push his hands away from you, leaning back to gain some distance. "i'm not a fucking flower, javier. i won't crumble with the wind." your words are venomous, spiteful. but when you finally look at him, you see those familiar, mysterious eyes; so full of hurt.

they're dark and puppy-dog like, searching your face for forgiveness when he speaks, "i didn't say that, querida, i just - just let me keep some of the bad stuff to myself. please," he implores.

you fall into his gaze, victim to his charm and warm presence. your body relaxes and you begin to let go of the feeling of rejection you carried just moments before. you just want him to be okay, to feel okay - to feel good.

"you can't keep it all in, baby, it's not healthy." now your hands are on his face, cupping his cheeks softly. with them, you push javi back, flush against the cushions. your hands fall from his face as you rise to straddle him where he sits. placing a kiss to his forehead, the stress begins to melt beneath your lips.

lifting your hips, you bring them back down firmly to rest on his bulge. his hands find their way instinctually around your waist. gripping his shoulders, you gain some support before cautiously grinding your hips against his again.

"what are you doing?" javier groans, hands stiffening but not stopping you.

"just let me help you forgot some of the bad stuff, okay?" you say in a whisper, head back in the crook of his neck.

his hands slide up your back, fingers digging into your skin ever so slightly as if to say okay.

sliding your hips backward again, you begin to rub your now throbbing center over him. your own pleasure builds, but that's not what you care about. as you grind and thrust you feel javier grow beneath you. there we go.

his hardened cock pressed up in you. javier lifts his hips, grinding his own into yours with force. a moan escapes your lips, hot breath meeting hot breath as you lean in the kiss him.

the kiss starts sloppy, eager, turning deep and lustful. his tongue swirls around yours, capturing each whimper as you creep toward orgasm. hands in your hair, he's tugging, pulling you through it. breaking the kiss you trail them down his neck, to his collarbones; never breaking contact with his growing bulge.

mouth agape, eyes drooping as you look up at his, simply the sight of him drives you to the edge. but to help you, coax you through, javier's fingers are down at your pussy, rubbing your clit through soaking wet fabric.

a loud, intense moan fills the room as you collapse into his chest. taking a moment to collect yourself you match your breath to his own. his is less shaky, calmer than usual after something like this. he didn't mutter a word either; no swears, no adoring pet names.

sitting up in his lap, kissing him on his temple you ask, "did you cum?"

he looks to you. you can tell by his eyes and the twitch of his upper lip how he's pondering; questioning whether or no to tell the truth you already know. "no baby," he pushes the hair from your face and tilts his own to take you in adoringly, "but i'm okay." he begins to wrap his arms around you once more but you throw them off in an instant.

climbing down from your spot over him, you fall to your knees on the floor before him. hands at his waistband, javier stops you.

"wait," he speaks arm folding over his face, "hand me a cigarette first." you oblige, happily. raising a fresh smoke to his lips with one hand, you bring the lighter up with the other. his eyes meet yours, black as the night sky. your eyes remain fixed on each others as you light it, toss the lighter to the side, and go right back to his waistband.

javier lifts his hips to allow you to remove the clothes that contain him. sinking back into the couch, he rests his arms on the back of it. he watches down on you as you pull his hard length out. springing up, it extends far enough to hit javier's stomach.

he looks to you with domination, but you want him to succumb to you. you want him blissed to heaven as to forget the troubles of his day. with a deep breathe, you pull a smirk onto your lips. you grab his cock gently with your hands.

“is this what will help you, hermoso?" he twitches beneath you at the use of the word, "i'm gonna make you forget all about what happened today." still eyeing each other, you sweeten your stare. not breaking your gaze, you bring your mouth to his tip. sticky with his precum, you rub it slowly over your closed lips. he groans, shifting in his seat.

removing your lips, you lean down to lick up the length of his cock, ending back at his tip with a flat tongue. spitting into your hand, you begin to rub him up and down. it's just the beginning, you think, so you're teasingly gentle. you apply barely any pressure around him, and he can't stand it.

"hermosa," he returns the endearment with a low groan. your response is not verbal. tightening your grip around his cock, you begin to jerk him faster. his head falls back in the cushions.

you bob your head down, taking his swollen tip into your mouth. swirling your tongue there for a moment, your hands work at the rest of him. eyes fall shut with concentration as you slide your head further down his length. you fit as much of him inside of you as you can manage. your hands remain at the base, aiding in his pleasure.

"fuckkk," he lets out as his tip hits the back of your throat. his hands move from their place gripping the couch to tangle themselves in your hair. "un ángel," he mutters "eres un puto angel..."

his praises make you work faster, bobbing your head at a higher pace. you can feel him throb beneath your tongue. his veins twitch beneath your hands. he grips your head steady, thrusting his hips forward as he creeps toward his own high. you've already had yours, but you can't help squeezing your thighs together to press down on your once again aching clit.

javier mutters out a slew of words - "fuck," your name, "cariño." you smile around him. this is how you want him.

it's not long before he's done for. bucking his hips up into your face, whimpering your name as he shoots hot cum all over your tired, raw tongue. pulling off of him with a pop, you wipe the corners of your mouth clean.

looking up at him, he is in pure bliss. sunken into the sofa, chest rising and falling rapidly. he collects himself, catching his breath before leaning forward to pull you up onto him from the floor.

playing with your hair, he admires you in silence for some time before he finally speaks. "such a good girl to me," he leans forward. brushing his nose to yours, his repeats, "you're such a good girl."

his arms wrap around you, sheltering you from everything beyond. lips falling into yours, he kisses you deeply, longingly. "gracias, mi amor," he speaks against your lips, "gracias."

#javier pena #javier pena smut #javier pena x reader #javier #javier pena fanfiction #javier pena narcos #pedro pascal #pedro pascal x reader #pedro pascal smut #pedro pascal fanfiction #husband pedro pascal #joel miller #din djarin #mando #the mandalorian #pedro pascal fic #pedro smut #pedro fluff #pedro pascal fandom #joel miller smut #established relationship #fem reader #x reader #pedro is daddy #pedro #pedrito #narcos #fairies-in-the-garden

[tieronecrush]

part of me, apart from me

rating: E (18+ only, MDNI)

word count: 14k....its a whole thing okay?

summary:

kindly requested from a lovely anon "You and Javi had one kid together when you were very young, maybe you broke up due to his work schedule. You reunite at their college graduation 👀"

javier & you had daughter right after he graduated college, you with a couple years left yourself. when she was 15, he got the call to head to colombia, deciding with you to pursue his career and leave the two of you in the safety of laredo. seven years later, your daughter is graduating from college and javier is back home for good after cali, forcing himself to face what he finds are his failures, and hold out hope that you still feel the same as he does.

warnings (SPOILERS): BIG self doubt, self deprecation, heavy guilt, separated relationship, co-parenting, javier being in unrequited love, chucho being a king and a great grandfather & father, strained familial relationships on mother's side, discussions of death/violence/drugs, smoking, alcohol use, mentions of food/eating, use of spanish, javi has total DAD moments, he is a DILF ofc, dirty talk, oral sex (f & m (briefly) receiving), unprotected sex, unplanned pregnancy, becomes established relationship, etc.

a/n: i don't think the anon who requested this realized what it would do to my brain, but i have created a whole universe for this fic. i am in love with their little family and they will live forever in my head and heart. a huge thank you to my bestie el @northernbluess for screaming about javi, this fic, giving me the title for this, and beta-reading this long ass fic for me. love you friend!!!! hope you all enjoy, and that you love them as much as i do!

The engine of Javier’s truck cuts as he turns the ignition, the loud rumble of its mechanics quieting to reveal the sounds of birds chirping. For Texas in May, it’s a pretty mild day, sunlight shining bright against the blue sky. There’s a handful of wispy clouds above him as he opens the door and steps down from the cab, shutting it with a metallic click. He rolls his shoulders and swings his arms to loosen up, the sweat at the nape of his neck is from his nerves more than the temperature.

It’s been two years since he has seen his daughter, Liliana, in person. He’d come back from Colombia after everything that went down with the Cali cartel and the government only a mere 48 hours ago. He’s exhausted, but he made the drive from Laredo to College Station to see his princesa, the light of his life for the last twenty-two years, graduate from college. Specifically, his alma mater, Texas A&M University.

He has been counting down the days until he was back for this occasion, after repeatedly reminding everyone in the embassy that he would be out of the country. It just so happens that he doesn’t need to return to Colombia as he had originally planned.

A deep inhale and slow exhale attempt to calm the jitters that are trembling his fingers.

Fuck, he really wants a cigarette.

But Lili would kill him if he showed up smelling like burnt tobacco when he had promised a week ago he was on the Nicorette thing.

Instead, he shakes his head to himself and hooks his sunglasses in the open chest of his light blue short-sleeve button-up. Out of habit, he reaches to his lower back to feel for his pistol, his touch brushing denim.

Another inhale, slow exhale.

He can do this.

It’s you and his daughter. Two people that he loves. Two people he’s been working for.

Maybe that’s why he’s so fucking nervous.

How can you welcome him back every time he makes a visit? How can his daughter be excited to talk to him every week from across the equator? He’s been gone for years. Most of her teenage life, and nearly all of her college career. He’s only been back once since she moved to university. Once.

What a fucking asshole.

Certainly not a good father.

His boots tick against the pavement of the front path up to the dingy, weather-worn two-story house. He remembers getting photographs of Liliana in front of this house a couple of years ago, sent from you and stuffed in an envelope along with photos retelling her entire summer. That one of her standing proudly in front of this house hung on his fridge until he packed it up two days ago.

Every day he looked at it, he wished nothing more than to have been like one of her friends’ dads that helped with moving in and fixing up the house, maybe slipping her a hundred dollar bill to spend on groceries or alcohol on his way out to the car after saying goodbye.

Instead, he was stuck in Colombia under the thumb of the U.S. government and sleazy CIA agents that were controlling him like a puppet.

He’s here now, though. And he’s trying so hard to get over the tightness in his chest, to clear the lump in his throat, and to dry his sweaty palms when he gets up the creaky wooden steps and up to the front door. His middle finger presses the doorbell aggressively, taking a step back and shaking out his shoulders again.

Gaze focused on his shoes, he looked up as he heard the door unlock. A wide, genuine grin breaks out on his face when he sees Liliana in the threshold, that same smile copied and pasted onto hers, even down to the dimple on his right cheek.

“Tata (Dad)! You’re here!” she exclaims, jumping out of the door and hooking her arms around his neck. He laughs as he catches her, one arm wrapping around her waist and his other hand reaching up to hold the back of her head. He pets her long, brunette hair, squeezing her in a tight hug against his chest.

“Oh, Lili Pad. Missed you so much, mija.” He kisses the side of her head before loosening his hold on her, taking in the sight of his daughter after seeing her only through photographs for years.

“Tata, I’m graduating college tomorrow. Not little Lili Pad anymore.”

Her eye roll gives Javier’s attitude a run for its money.

Damn, she really got a lot from his gene pool.

The same deep brown eyes with hints of amber, softened and round give away their every emotion. The same mouth that finds a perfect pout, combined with those eyes he was always pushed over when she was younger. Anything she wanted, he would give to her. Even now.

She has your nose, though. Your ears. Your feminine facial structure. Your charming, warm personality.

“You’re always gonna be Lili Pad, amorcita. Always gonna be my babygirl,” he presses another kiss to her temple, unraveling her from him, “But you have grown into such a beautiful woman, Lili. You remind me of your mamá when she was your age.”

“There’s that Peña charm.”

He looks over his daughter’s shoulder and sees you leaning against the banister, arms crossed over your chest with a smirk playing at your lips. His heart rate increases to double speed, his now dry hands clamming up again as he drinks you in from head to toe.

Years away and he is still so fucking in love with you.

Another reason to curse his time in Colombia.

It was a mutual decision, to split up before he left. There was no timeline for how long he would be gone or when he could come back that first time he went down there.

And there was no way in hell he was putting the two most important people in his life in the middle of what was basically a fucking warzone.

So, that was that. Co-parents, and close friends.

And an agonizing ache every time he saw you since he left.

He grins right back at you, Lili waving him inside after her. Crossing the entryway to you, he opens his arms with a quirk of his brows.

Your smirk reaches its full stretch, shifting into a gracious smile as you drop your arms and step into his, snaking your hands around to his back. He holds you tightly, a shorter embrace than the one with Liliana but long enough for your signature scent to pull him back to being a young, dumb college student who was madly in love. A chaste kiss is pressed to your cheek before he pulls away.

“I’m pretty sure she gets that from you, amor. I don’t recall a time when you weren’t able to get what you wanted — everyone you meet thinks you’re a delight.”

“See? More charm. Laying it on a little thick, Jav,” you tease, hitting your fist against his bicep gently.

He glances at your arm when you lower it back to your side, catching the glint of the bracelet with Liliana’s initials in gold charms that is always on your wrist. He gave it to you after she was born, once she was taken home from the hospital and the two of you were standing over her crib watching her sleep. Ever since then, he’s never seen you without it.

“Alright, alright. Enough of the weird, complimentary back-and-forth you guys do. Do you wanna see the place before I move out, viejo?” Lili cuts in and Javi’s eyes leave your wrist to look at her with a smile.

“Ay, no soy viejo, princesa (Ay, I am not old, princess). Now lead the way and no more making fun of me,” he nods for her to walk ahead of him, taking a few steps and glancing back at you, “You not coming on the tour, amor?”

You shake your head and give Liliana a look that says ‘Care to explain?’. Being on the receiving end of that look many times, he knows it a bit too well coming from you.

“Mom is being amazing and helpful and wonderful like Mom always is and is packing my closet for me.” Lili cringes as she admits it to her father, Javier shaking his head and letting out a long exhale.

“Liliana, you have known you’re moving for months and you’ve waited until the day before graduation to pack? Dios, somos demasiado parecidos (God, we are too much alike),” he nods for her to continue walking as you laugh behind him, the sound traveling as you walk upstairs and bringing a faint smile to his lips as he follows his daughter.

He hovers around Lili’s room as you pace from her closet to the cases laid out on the floor, organizing everything and folding as you walk back and forth. Your daughter is downstairs, tasked with packing up her items from the kitchen and the living room. Javi’s been given the whole tour, now dropped off to “catch up with Mom”, as Lili put it.

Across the surfaces and walls, he spies the little gifts he’s sent her over his years away: all of the birthday cards he’s hand-picked and written letters in stacked in a box on her desk, the mola depicting lilies framed and hanging on her wall, the brightly colored Wayuu mochila that he’d bought from one of the open air markets in Bogotá hanging off of the door knob to her closet.

There’s a sharp pain in his chest when he sees the small picture frames sitting on her nightstand. He sits on the edge of her bed and picks them up one by one to study them. The first is a photo of you and Lili, smiling from ear to ear. He recognizes the photo as one he took on his visit before last, the one he made before Lili went to college. The pair of you are standing in the middle of an overgrown field on the Peña ranch, sun setting in the background. Lili insisted on watching the sunset all together on Javi’s last night at home, and he snuck the camera out with the three of you.

He has a copy of the photo right next to his bed, too.

Setting the frame down delicately, he picks up the next one, this one of Lili and him alone. It’s from years ago, the wide smile on Lili’s face showing off her missing front tooth. Javi grins back at his little girl in the photo, his eyes combing over to the younger version of him, way back when he was a sheriff in Laredo. It must have been during the holidays — there’s a shiny plastic red gift bow on his chest and Lili is wearing a knit sweater with a snowman on it.

Where did all the time go?

The last photograph grows the lump in his throat and the ache in between his ribs. It’s a photo of the three of you, one from his most recent visit a couple of years ago. Dressed up for a Dean’s Award ceremony that Liliana was nominated for. She looks like the spitting image of you, and you are absolutely glowing with pride for her. You two are so beautiful. He looks exhausted, anxiety in his eyes that never seems to have left since his first year in the DEA. It was around the time when he thought he was going to be able to stay, to be around for Lili and for you. He told you what happened in Colombia that got him sent home; you understood, of course, you understood why he did it all. And he admitted it all with the faintest smile on his face, the thought of getting to settle was appealing more and more to him.

And then he got the call.

He battled with the decision.

He talked to you about it.

You said, “We’re always gonna be here, Jav. You need to go. What’s a few more years?”

Everything. A few more years was everything.

He missed so much.

“You okay, Jav?”

He looks up from the photo in his hands, eyes focusing back on the room instead of a million miles ahead. You are kneeling next to one of the suitcases, carefully placing some of your daughter’s clothes in neatly. Those eyes you’re giving him turn his brain to mush, all of the escalating thoughts dripping away.

“Yeah, yeah, all good. Reminiscing,” he nods to himself as he turns the photo for you to see before setting it back down, pulling a grin onto his face, “Do you remember when the three of us would all go out to dinner or meet up with my tíos and tías when Lili was a baby? And they would always ask us when we were getting married?”

A gentle laugh comes from you as you think back, knowing how many times you got asked the same question over and over again.

“Yes, I definitely remember that. I also remember you getting so annoyed one day that you just—”

“Lied and said that we got married at the courthouse?”

“Yes! I got such an onslaught of questions after you said that. That news, which wasn’t even news, spread like wildfire throughout your family.”

“Well, at least it got people off our backs, esposa,” he winks, grin lifting to one side to meld into a smirk.

You roll your eyes dramatically, the wide smile peeling your lips apart making Javi’s heart race faster.

“You want some help, amor? Feel like an imbécil not doing anything,” he slaps his hands on his knees as he stands from Lili’s bed, taking the handful of steps that separate you. One knee is bent to bring him down to the ground, huffing out a sigh as he gets fully onto his knees.

“Sure you’re gonna be able to get up from the floor, viejo?” You raise an eyebrow at him as you continue to put rolled clothes into the luggage. Javier rolls his eyes, shaking his head.

“I think I can handle getting up from the ground, bromista. Been jumping off of roofs and trekking through fucking jungles for seven years.” He doesn’t wait for your response, grabbing one of the unfolded shirts from next to you and attempting to fold it as neatly as you’ve done with the rest of them.

“Alright, alright. I believe you. How about I roll, you organize what I hand you into the suitcase? Sounds good?” You hold a hand out for the shirt in his hand, a small laugh as he resigns his attempt and passes the fabric over.

“Sí, jefa (Yes, boss),” a soft grin pulls one side of his mouth up, deepening the dimple on his right cheek. You look at him with your own tender smile when you hand him a rolled pair of jeans to put away, reaching your hand up to poke the little crevice in his cheek like you always do — like you always did.

The two of you work quietly for a few minutes, falling into a rhythm. Liliana makes noise from downstairs, cabinets open and closing, sounds of bubble wrap being ripped echoing throughout the house.

“How’re you doin’, Jav?”

The question strikes him, slumping his shoulders and training his gaze on the shirt in his hands as he rubs his index and thumb over the softened cotton.

It’s a simple enough question; he expected you to ask when you first saw him. In a greeting, he thought it would be easy to brush it off, tell you ‘Estoy bien’ or that he was happy to be home.

But right now, packing up his daughter’s clothes to move her out of college and back into your home — the day before his little girl’s graduation — it feels too difficult to lie.

Sitting alone here with you, the mother of his daughter, the beauty that gave him his greatest gift, the woman — the strong, commanding, warm, gentle woman that he is still so incredibly in love with — is drawing the truth out of him before he can fully catch up with what he’s admitting.

“Feeling like a real pendejo. I missed so much. Too much, amor. I’m sorry.”

“Jav. You are here now. You always show up when she needs her Tata. Even if it’s not physically, you show up for her every day. No more of that talk this weekend, do you hear me? You’re here. That’s it. Not missing anything.”

How do you always know what to say to him?

How did he ever walk away from you?

Javier nods his head, pressing his lips into a tight line as his fingers twitch for nicotine. He would kill for that slow drag of smoke filling his lungs, relaxing his racing mind and heart with a break that lasts as long as the burning paper and tobacco.

Instead, he stands on his knees, grabbing the plastic pack out of his pocket and popping out a chiclet of gum, tossing it into his mouth, and chewing furiously. The look on your face is observational, a twitch of your lips into the faintest grin calms him nearly as much as a cigarette would.

He sits back on his haunches, one of his hands reaching to touch you, faltering when your head turns down to fold the item of clothing in your hands.

“Te quiero, esposa,” his hand grazes his fingertips along the denim covering his thighs, twitching to move the hair curtaining your face, “Thank you.”

“No need to thank me, Jav,” your head shakes back and forth subtly, eyes lifting from your lap and softening as you smile at him, “Love you, too.”

“Jesús Cristo, Liliana, you have a lot of shit. I went to college with a suitcase and a duffle bag — and left four years later with just the duffle bag,” Javier shakes his head as he carries the last piece of luggage downstairs to the living room where the rest of her packed belongings are accumulating to pack up in your three cars the day after her graduation.

“God, Jav, you sound like my father. ‘I walked twelve miles to school with rocks in my backpack and in a foot of snow’,” you drop your voice to mock him, laughing with your daughter as she walks in from the kitchen and stands next to you, “Getting to be an old man, Peña.”

“Mamá is right, Tata. You’re the youngest dad out of all my friends and you sound the oldest right now,” Lili says through a wide smile, and you laugh with her now, sending Javier a brightly teasing grin.

He grumbles and rolls his eyes, waving a hand at both of you dismissively.

“Yeah, yeah. Enough from you two bromistas. Y’know, I didn’t miss you two ganging up on me — it was one thing through the phone, but in person is just too much.”

Your tongue clicks and you walk over to him, pinching his cheek as you pass by him, “Aw, Jav, it’s all love. You’re just easy to rile up, makes it fun.”

You wink at him with your back to Liliana, slipping out of the room to grab more of her boxes from the kitchen. At your touch and the minuscule flirtation, his heart rate thumps louder in his ears. His eyes follow you out of the room, snapping back when Liliana asks him a question. He shakes himself out of the trance, looking over to his daughter and stepping over to where she’s stood in front of an open box.

“Qué pasa, mija? (What’s up, my daughter?)” Javier reaches an arm up and wraps it around her shoulders, holding her against his side as he presses a kiss to her head. His eyes drop to what’s held in front of her, a chill running down his spine when he sees a photo of Escobar across the front page of the newspaper, the headline reading ‘ESCOBAR KILLED IN MEDELLÍN’.

“Do you want this copy, Tata? I kept two of them, but I think the other one is already packed away and I don’t know if I need both anymore really. Kept one to show my professors all about you,” Lili turns her head and looks up at him.

Javier shakes his head, a tight smile facing his daughter before he drops his arm from her shoulders.

“No, no thanks, mija. No need to keep the other one either. I wasn’t even there for that, amorcita. I think I was actually about to come over to Mamá’s house to see you when I got the call,” he tasks his antsy hands with sealing a cardboard box with packing tape, “May as well toss them out. Or send them to Mr. Murphy if you want them to be kept safe.”

“I don’t want to get rid of the other one. I want to keep it. Even if you weren’t there for it, you still did so much work to get to that point, Tata. I mean, you doing all of that in Colombia is what made me want to do criminal psychology,” she carefully slips the newspaper into one of the open boxes, closing it up and holding her hand out for the tape roll.

“Mi princesa, you—“

“I know, Tata. I promise I am not going to be running on rooftops or caught in the middle of shootouts with the DEA. No fighting cartels, viejo. I just want to work with profiling and behind-the-scenes stuff.” She takes the tape, closing up the box completely as Javier’s heart cinches in his chest.

He is so incredibly proud of his Lili Pad, but he can’t deny how angry he got when Liliana chose her major finally — of course, it had to be criminology. She explained she was drawn to it because of his work, but assured that she is not interested in doing the same thing he has done for years. Behind the scenes, possibly going into forensic psychology or helping to profile criminals. Office jobs, for the most part. But he couldn’t shake that anger inside for months; never been angry with his daughter, and he knew she was as headstrong as him and would achieve what she wanted. He was angry with himself, for even planting any sort of seed, even unknowingly, for Lili to get into this type of work. He knows that eventually her end of the promise might not be kept — he knows her, how easily excitable she can get with new opportunities. She’ll likely end up climbing ranks or even getting into some agency like the FBI or something.

The thought of her out there, in a tac vest or with a weapon, makes bile burn his esophagus.

“Alright, I think we’re done here for today. Better go check into the hotel and we can get ready quick, then we can swing by and pick you up for dinner, Lili.” Your voice pulls him out of his spiral, stare focusing back into the room and glancing over at you in the doorway from the kitchen.

“Sí, jefa. Sounds like a plan,” he pats the pockets of his jeans and feels for his truck keys, “You gonna be ready if we come in an hour, princesa?”

Lili rolls her eyes, crossing her arms over her chest and popping her hip out, a stance all too familiar to Javier.

“Sí, Tata. Besides, I’m not the one you should be asking that to. Mom is always the one who takes longer to get ready.”

Javier laughs when you walk over to your daughter, pinching her side playfully. He shakes his head and gives Liliana a knowing look.

“Mija, I have known that fact about your mamá for longer than you’ve been alive. I’m guessing it will be an hour and a half until we’re back, but wanted to make sure you were actually ready. An hour to you women is at least an hour and fifteen to the rest of the world.”

Javier smiles with a loud laugh as both you and Lili approach him and swat his arms, pinching his sides without causing any pain whatsoever. There were protests on either side of him, his daughter and her mother annoyed with the judgments on their time management but all three of them knew he was right.

“Alright, alright, I apologize…” he surrenders from the assault with his hands up, taking deep breaths as he recovers from his laughter before continuing with a smirk, “But we all know I’m right!”

Javier makes a quick exit out of the room and through the front door before any other hits or pinches can be given to him, hearing the stifled laughter from you and Lili from inside the house.

“Yeah, you better run, Jav!” you call out as you gather your purse and fish out your car keys, saying a quick goodbye to Lili and following his path out of the house, “Now I’m gonna be ready in an hour just to prove you wrong.”

“That would only make me overjoyed. Maybe we could make our reservation in time then,” he waves goodbye to Liliana before turning to continue down the front path of her house, to his truck parked in front of your small SUV.

“You wanna follow me over there?” he asks as he unlocks the driver’s side door, watching you open yours and nod to him.

“Yeah, sounds good to me. Don’t be driving like a bat out of hell, though, Javier.”

“Hey, I can’t make any promises. Used to driving all around Colombian cities, it’s a lot different on those roads,” he jokes before making sure you get into your car, hopping into the truck, and listening to the engine turn over before he leads you both over to your accommodations for the rest of the weekend.

“You have got to be kidding me.”

“I’m so sorry, Mr. Peña. We would normally be absolutely willing to find a solution for you, but we’re fully booked for the graduation weekend. We only have one room for you.” The front desk receptionist looks terrified of Javier at this moment, his glare that he has perfected, normally reserved for serious criminals or dirty agents, is aimed directly at the young college student working here.

When the two of you were trying to check in, they had been informed that the reservation Javier had made for the two of you, two standard rooms, had been double booked, resulting in the parties involved only getting delegated one room each. 

His jaw notched to the side, hands gripping the edge of the front counter with his arms wide and head dipping down in annoyance. He picks it up, addressing the hotel employee again.

“I made a reservation months ago. I called from fucking Colombia — I paid about forty dollars wasting twenty minutes on the phone with whoever was working that day just to get this booked—”

“Jav,” your hand finds his chest as his eyes find yours, the rapid heartbeat thumping in his chest definitely not slowing down at what was supposed to be your soothing touch, “It’s fine. We can survive with one room for two nights. It’s either taking this or sleeping on the floor at Lili’s.”

Holding your gaze, he can see the words unsaid in the look you’re giving him.

Shut up and take the room key.

And there’s no way he is continuing to argue with the kid in front of him as he squirms under your own stern stare. With a grumble, he straightens up, your hand leaving his chest and cool, conditioned air chilling the spot that was covered in your warmth. The rest of the check-in process is painless, with Javier paying for the stay and taking the room keys. He turns around to face you, handing you one of the access cards and nodding toward the elevators.

“Let me take that, amor.” He leans down and grabs both duffles from the floor, one his and one yours, following your lead over to the elevators. The two of you stand and wait for the doors to open, the familiar ding alerting them to which one will be taking them up to their floor. When the doors slide apart, a large group of people started to spill out into the lobby. You step back to avoid a collision with a man not watching where he is walking, and Javier’s hand immediately finds your lower back to steady you. It lingers as the rush of people clears out — he makes no move to take it away until he guides you into the small square space, dropping his touch to press the button for your floor.

Once the two of you make it into the room, he sets your bags down on the desk and dresser, walking over to the thermostat to turn it down for you without a second thought.

“You remember,” you observe with a grin, rifling through your bag to find your toiletries and a change of clothes for dinner.

“Course I do, always had to have the air blasting in our apartment or the house. You never could sleep without a massive blanket and your toes under my legs. Never did understand your need to be freezing, always,” he chuckles at the memories of every night with you, until the separation when he was assigned to Bogotá.

“I dunno why either, just was always the most comfortable. Felt cozier, plus it always gave an excuse to cuddle.” Your giggle sends a tingle from his ears down the back of his neck and across his shoulders, a shudder easily blamed on the intense fans of the air-con.

“Go ahead and take the first shower, esposa. I’ll wait so that you can have more time to get ready and all that,” Javier crosses the room, saddling up next to you to rummage through his own weekender bag. In his periphery, he can see you flash a smile as you gather your things in one arm, using the free hand to brush across his shoulder blades when you walk behind him.

“Very kind, Jav. I’ll be quick, I promise.”

You stand in the doorway of the bathroom and he picks his head up, turning it to look at you. Head to toe, he scans you quickly before settling on your face, shaking his head.

“Take your time, amor. We both know I can be ready in ten minutes if I need to be,” he sends you a wink and half a smirk appears when you laugh, shutting the door behind you.

He hears the water run, kicking off his boots and sitting at the edge of the bed with an extensive sigh. Rubbing his eyes of exhaustion, he’s still for a moment. Shoulders drop, limbs feeling heavy as the day catches up with him. Moving, packing, even fighting with himself has drained him over the course of the day.

He loved spending time with his Liliana again, seeing her eager to walk the stage tomorrow and collect her diploma. And being around you again, drudging up all of the feelings and desires and words that he has tamped down for the last seven years. But it all comes with reminders of how absent he was, thousands of miles away, how undeserving he is of being welcomed back into the arms of you two, how his daughter was so proud, idolized him so much that she chose to study a major that puts her in the same field of work. He deserves distance from her, a cold shoulder from you — aloofness of some sort for the choice he made.

At least that’s what he’s told himself over and over for nearly the last decade. No matter how much you or Lili continually proved those thoughts wrong, they always came back.

He glances at his watch before standing and moving toward the bag again, hearing the water shut off and moving to grab his toiletries. Taking out the leather Dopp kit jostles something else in the bag loose, flinging it out onto the floor. Bending down with a sigh to retrieve it, he’s faced with the metal badge emblazoned with the DEA seal and ‘USA’ carved into it. It must have been in the bag from his plane ride earlier this week, and it serves as a blatant reminder of what he needs to talk to you about on this trip. What he needs to tell Liliana, too.

The badge gets thrown back into the bag and he walks toward the open bathroom door, stopping short within the threshold. You’re standing at the counter, products splayed around you to do your makeup. Even after living with you for 15 years, he barely has a clue what any of it does besides lipstick and mascara. He’d spent many mornings and evenings listening to you explaining your routine, but never quite getting down all the product names. There’s a pang in his chest, felt deep in the bones of his rib cage; the sight gives him major deja vu, nostalgia wavering over him. Even his subconscious longs for a time when you were his.

A humorous smile reflects back at him with your eyes glued to his in the mirror. Your fingers tap a rogue-colored product across your cheeks, giving you a bit of a brighter, subtly flushed look.

“Sorry, Jav, promise I’ll be out of here in like five minutes. I am trying to be quick.”

“Cálmate, amor. No hay prisa.There’s no rush, really…” he clears his throat, setting his toiletry bag down on an open space at the counter. He leans one hip against it, body facing you and studying the motions of painting your face while his mind works up the courage to bring up the pressing conversation.

“I, um, I actually have to tell you something.” His eyes cast down to the side, the grout of the tiles suddenly interested him.

“What is, Jav? You can tell me anything, you know that.” The compact in your hand is forgotten, clicked closed, and set down next to you as you mirror his stance. One hip against the counter, facing him.

“I know. I know. There’s just—It’s kind of a big thing and I wanted to tell you as soon as it all happened but I didn’t know how things would exactly shake out…”

“Javier. Take a breath,” you instruct him, hand against his chest with purposeful pressure, taking a deep inhale along with him and letting it out slowly. You don’t remove your hand, and he’s grateful for the gesture.

“I retired from the DEA two days ago. The morning before I left to come home. So, uh, I’m back at the ranch with Pop and I’ll be here now.” A mess of emotion comes out of his voice — fear, anxiety, relief, disappointment. Painfully, he drags his eyes up to your face, seeing your eyes wide with surprise and your brows relaxing from shooting up at the news. It’s an unreadable, unfamiliar expression; he watches as it all morphs behind your eyes before sympathy washes over every feature of yours, tender tone speaking up in the tiny bathroom.

“What happened?”

Everything was spilling out after that — information that was surely spreading across the US over the last 48 hours, not that he paid any attention to the news right now. Ambassador Crosby told him that he had won, that the Cali Godfathers would be locked up, at least for the foreseeable future. How dirty he felt when Crosby said the words, “You played the system like a goddamn fiddle…” The ledger proving the Colombian president’s campaign donations from the Cali cartel in exchange for immunity, the knowledge that the US government allowed all of it to occur, how he had spoken about it all to the reporter from El Tiempo.

“Javier, Jav, oh—I’m so proud of you.” The air is knocked him his lungs when the sound of those words reaches his ears, the next second being wrapped up in your tight embrace. It takes a moment to register your hug before he relaxes his weight against you, tension melting as you speak to him right next to his ear, “You told the truth. You helped every single Colombian citizen know what their government was doing to them. Just, holy shit, Javi. That’s fucking badass. I’m so, so proud of you, honey.”

Kindness, understanding, and comfort ooze around him and break down the stoicism that he’s been masked with for the last two days, tears welling in his eyes and spilling a few over that he quickly wipes away.

How can you always seem to find endless compassion for him? He’s just told you he quit his job with no real backup plan and all you said was how proud of him you are.

You’re a really good friend.

A great friend, actually.

Fuck, he is so in love with you still it hurts.

“Thank you…I don’t deserve your pride though, I did so many bad things,” his voice is hoarse on the last word, tightening his arms around you to quell his emotion.

“None of that, Jav. You uncovered a whole fucking…political scandal. Told people what their governments were doing. That’s honest; it’s ethical and respectable. You did the right thing, Jav.”

The last few words grow the lump in his throat, a slow nod against the side of your head. His lips brush your ear, confiding as if it is something he hasn’t said many times before, “Te quiero, amor.”

The smile is evident in your voice despite the fact that the hug keeps your face from his sight, and the saccharine sweetness of your voice sends his heart racing again, “Love you too, honey.”

At dinner, once there’d been a few drinks and some food served, Javier told Liliana the news he broke to you in your hotel bathroom. Albeit, it was an abridged version, details of his mistakes and pains of guilt left out for his precious daughter’s sake. She was eager to get out into the world and make a difference, and he had all the faith that she could, unlike him. He didn’t want his story to taint her view of what she was going to be able to achieve with her sheer determination.

He had that at one point. Probably lost it sometime in the last few years, slowly and then all at once when those tapes were found.

Liliana was understanding of her father resigning, chalking it up to his years down there catching up with him and teasing him for being an old man now. He took it gracefully, laughing along with the two of you and riffing on his own, with self-effacing jokes. As the conversation wrapped up, questions from Lili were answered by him — he was home, for good, living with Chucho and helping run the ranch. He would absolutely be around to help her get ready for her first day at work and help her move into her new apartment in San Antonio. And yes, he would be delighted to come over for dinner once or twice a week to spend some time with her, and you. Liliana had formulated the idea herself, earning a nod of approval from you and a warm invitation seconded.

After he accepted, Liliana changed the subject to rant about whoever the university had chosen for the commencement speech and how random of a choice it was. He listened intently, always hanging on every word from his Lili Pad, but he couldn’t help but be distracted by your hand coming to the place on his thigh closest to his knee, resting there for a moment before giving him a supportive squeeze. Nothing was spoken about the gesture, no looks were exchanged when your hand stayed there until the food came.

Sitting in the booth, observing and listening to his girls bounce back and forth in conversation, he finds the first moment of resounding comfort that he’s felt in seven years.

The last conversation he had with Spencer just days ago after the recent trial in D.C. rings in his mind, the two men standing at the displayed photos of Special Agents from the DEA.

He had asked Javier, “What else is a guy like you gonna do?”

At the time, Javier wasn’t too sure.

But now, with two of his favorite smiles beaming, one identical to his own, and the chorus of laughter that soundtracks his life, and his heart racing, the heart that bleeds for his family sitting here with him, he knows what he’s gonna do.

Be a father.

Be a partner.

Be a friend, a son, a lover, a teacher, a student, a listener, a provider, a protector.

Be everything he hasn’t been for nearly a decade.

He is going to be there for you two. No matter what.

The two of you are back in the hotel room, Liliana dropped off safely at her home and promptly reminded of the schedule for tomorrow. Javier threw her a, “Don’t be too hungover,” that you rolled your eyes at, the faintest of smiles on your face, knowing exactly how Javier was at his own graduation. You, unknowingly pregnant with Lili at the time, were feeling sick and extremely nervous to be seeing his parents the next day, so there was no drinking for you that night. The next morning you were rubbing his back as he threw up before dragging him into the shower and then dressing him like a doll.

He remembers the only thing he was thinking that morning was how much he loved you, how much he was going to miss you after moving home to Laredo to become a sheriff while you were finishing school the next year.

Life seemed so simple back then; only had to worry about visiting his girlfriend at the weekends, showing up for work on time, and taking care of his parents.

A few weeks later, you told him you were pregnant.

God, how fast was time moving? He feels like that was merely last year.

“Bathroom’s all yours, Jav.”

He looks up from his duffel to see you walking out in your pajamas, a smirk crossing his face at the faded Texas A&M shirt he recognized from his own closet from years before. With a nod to you, he unbuttons his shirt halfway before talking to you over his shoulder.

“I can take the floor, amor. You take the bed.”

A loud laugh from behind turns him around, and you look at him like he’s got about four heads.

“Javier Luis, you’re not going to be able to get up in the morning if you sleep on the floor, viejo. If it’s weird for you to sleep in the bed with me, I’ll be the one to take the floor.”

“No, you’re not. And it’s not weird for me, I just didn’t know if you would be comfortable with it.”

“Don’t know if you forgot, but we have slept in the same bed together before, Jav. It’s kind of how we have a daughter, you dork,” you snort and climb onto the plush mattress, slipping under the duvet and leaning up against the pillows.

“Hey, I was trying to be a gentleman, no need for the name-calling.”

“You are always a gentleman, hon, no need to try. Plus I have to call you names, who else will keep you humble?”

“Our daughter. That’s who. I think she’s worse than you with the jokes,” he laughs.

Your smile widens, laughing along with him and shrugging, “I wonder where she gets that from.”

A wink is sent his way, stirring his stomach before he clears his throat and nods to the bathroom, “Gonna get ready for bed, you all done in there?”

“Yeah, yeah. Go for it,” you wave toward the bathroom, grabbing your book from the nightstand.

Javier makes quick work of brushing his teeth and the rest of his night routine, avoiding his tired reflection before shutting the lights out and going back into the bedroom. Book still in your hand, he stands in his jeans again, rubbing the back of his neck. Without looking up you pat the spot next to you.

“I know you sleep in your boxers, just get in the damn bed.”

Ever since you became a mom, your power of reading his mind has gotten way too good.

Well, maybe it isn’t perfect cause if you could read his mind, you probably wouldn’t have suggested sharing a bed again with the amount of time he spends thinking about you.

“Sometimes it makes me mad how often you know what I’m going to say,” he grumbles and shucks off his jeans leaving them at the side of the bed and climbing under the covers. He stays comfortably at the side of the bed, sighing deeply as he closes his eyes. 

“Comes with experience.”

“Why can’t I do it for you then?” He opens his eyes and turns onto his side to look at you, “I’ve known you just as long as you’ve known me.”

The book in your hands is closed, and laid in your lap, looking down at Javier and shrugging, “You have your own way of it. I might know what you’re going to say, but you always anticipate everyone’s needs and you’re always one step ahead of me. I mean, you always see like four steps ahead. You saved Lili many broken bones at the playground growing up and you always used to be able to cheer me up and fix whatever was making me sad or angry before I really even knew what it was myself.”

A grin slowly pulls the corners of your lips apart, one of your hands reaching over to tap the top of his head. 

“Well, I quickly learned the signs of your hangriness. That was most often the reason you were upset,” he chuckles, one side of his mouth ticking up as he relaxes further into the bed.

Comfortable silence falls over the two of you as you read your book for a few more minutes, Javier lying next to you and trying, half-assed, to fall asleep. He really was just sneaking glances at you every time he adjusted positions, admiring the concentrated look on your face, engrossed in the story.

At one point, the book was shut for the night and set on the nightstand, the lamp clicked off and you relaxed back into bed. You turned on your side to face him, voice whisper quiet, “You asleep, Jav?”

He hums lowly, vibrations absorbed by the mattress before his eyes peel open and adjust to the darkness.

“Not yet. Qué pasa, amor?”

“Did you quit smoking?”

“Uh, I guess so, yeah. Why are you asking that now?”

“Just curious. I didn’t see you dip outside to smoke at all today and you got a non-smoking room, too. Very un-Javier.”

“Oh, is that all I am to you, esposa? A smoker?” He has a lilt of teasing in his voice, raising his eyebrows as you laugh faintly.

“Shut up, I didn’t say that.” There’s a gentle shove to his shoulder before your hands are back by you, tucked under your chin as you curl up again.

“I was going to congratulate you on quitting, but now I’m not sure if I want to, meanie.”

“You’re the one randomly questioning me about my habits! Meanie.”

“I am not a meanie, I had no bad intentions!”

“Sure, and what would you have said if I told you I didn’t quit?”

Javier gives you a satisfied smirk when you’re silent, shaking his head to himself.

“Knew it,” he rolls onto his back, hand resting on his stomach and turning his head to the side, “I quit ‘cause Lili called me before I came home and asked me to. She’s asked for a while, but I kept putting it off with the stress of work and everything. Thought now’s the time after I resigned.”

In the darkness, he suddenly feels your hand on his bicep closest to you, rubbing up and down slowly.

“You’re a good dad, Jav. The best. Glad you’re the one I got to have a kid with.”

If he says anything now, it will come out incoherent from the lump sitting in his throat. Instead, he hums in response, nothing else spoken until you’ve fallen asleep.

“I’m glad it was me, too.”

It is hot as fuck.

He’s trying so hard not to sweat his ass off while in the cattle of people funneling into the arena at this moment, attempting to keep his light beige button-up dry. He was going to wear his normal uniform of jeans and a short-sleeved shirt when he heard the weather report on the TV this morning, but your face when you saw him pull out navy slacks and his long-sleeved shirt that he packed, was too excitable and adorable to not wear anything else — “We’ll be matching! Our pictures will be so cute with Lili in her white dress.” Standing in your floral, mid-length navy dress, who was he to deny you those coordinated photos? 

Things had been much more…familiar since last night and this morning. It was the back and forth that was effortless, the fall into a perfectly choreographed routine — him anticipating your moves and you knowing what he was thinking before he could even ask a question. The close quarters of the shared room suddenly felt much too large to Javier; he was desperate for too small of space so he could stay close to you, but with 15 years of experience living together, and even longer dating, you moved too in sync with each other to collide.

He was close to you this morning, though, waking up at the sound of the alarm clock next to his side of the bed; his arm moved to shut it off, coasting along your hip and thigh before reaching behind him to stop the noise. A grumble from you pulled him back, positioning himself again on his side and adjusting the arm that ended up underneath your head, his chest enveloping your back when his other arm slung around your waist. If he closed his eyes, he could swear it was any other morning from before Colombia, stretching all the way back to his bed in his shitty college apartment that you tolerated spending nights in.

There isn’t a thing in this world he wouldn’t give to be able to have this wake up every day from now on.

He knows he needs to talk to you, to tell you all that he is feeling, but he can’t bring himself to do it now. Not before his daughter’s college graduation when the two of you are getting along like old friends. The peace shouldn’t be disrupted by you potentially rejecting him.

Which has brought him standing behind you in the crowd of parents and families, a hand on your lower back to keep a tab on you as everyone filters in through the doors. He keeps his eyes scanning out of habit, searching for a danger that surely isn’t there, while you chat away with Chucho walking directly next to you.

His attention is elsewhere, anxiety creeping into his bones at the masses gathering here, impossible to keep tabs on everyone. The three most important people to him are in this building, and he has no means to protect them if something happened—

No. Enough. This isn’t Colombia. There are no sicarios here.

It’s supposed to be an enjoyable day.

The thoughts circle in his mind as a mantra while the three of you find seats, Javier tailing with you in the middle of him and his father. You sit at the end of one row, holding the same order when you finally take your seats.

Smoothing your skirt, Javier watches as you turn to Chucho, giving him an update about something that was recently repaired in the house.

“Wait, you had to get a new water heater? Why didn’t you tell me you needed one?” he interjects with an edge, brow furrowing as he grills you.

“Jav, it was fine, Pops helped me call around for quotes and we found a good deal. It was solved in like two days. It didn’t seem like it was something I needed to make a long-distance phone call for,” you sigh defeatedly, leaning back and looking down at your nails, fidgeting with your fingers at his harshness.

Javier rolls his eyes, grumbling under his breath, “I should have known. Could’ve helped with it…Eres tan terca. Nunca pides ayuda, incluso si la necesitas. Terca. (You are so stubborn. You never ask for help, even if you need it. Stubborn.)”

Chucho stretches an arm behind your back, hitting his shoulders to sit up and addressing him with a stern tone.

“Mijo, no te pongas tan quisquilloso. Ella no quería preocuparte todo el camino allí abajo. Disculpas. (Son, don't be so oversensitive. She didn't want to worry you all the way down there. Apologize.)”

His jaw ticks to the side, sitting up straight, and shaking his head. With a sigh, he turns to you, leaning closer to speak without his father overhearing.

“I’m sorry, amor. I didn’t mean to be rude; I get frustrated not being around to help you with stuff like that. Shouldn’t have taken it out on you like that. ‘M glad Pop was there to help if I couldn’t.”

Your hand rests on his thigh, patting lovingly as you respond at the same level as him, “Next time, I’ll call you first, Jav. And then you can be the one to call Chucho for actual help.”

A smirk grows at your jest, and he falls back into his seat with a scoff.

“God, you are ruthless. Always with the jokes, esposa. Don’t know if I should be sticking around if it’ll be like this,” he chuckles, stretching an arm behind you and resting it on the back of your chair. 

“Yeah, yeah. We both know you’re gonna be around a lot more now.” His head snaps to the side to see you looking ahead with the faintest of smiles, biting back a much wider one as you lean back into his arm.

After a processional to Pomp and Circumstance, all three of you waving madly to Liliana when she spotted you in the crowd, the ceremony proceeds with little fanfare. Speeches are made, congratulations extended to all of the students from various faculty members and the special guest speaker. When it finally came time for conferring of degrees, Javier awaits the long line of A though O names. The three of you stand, watching the handful of students ahead of Lili cross the stage.

The dean of her college stands at the microphone, saying with a rehearsed smile, “Liliana Raquel Peña, Summa Cum Laude.”

At the announcement of her name and honors, the three of you erupt in cheers for the young woman crossing the stage. Javier whistles with his fingers, holding out the sound as long as he can before clapping his hands together wildly. Once Lili is descending the stairs and back to her seat, you all wave to her again as she beams up at you and shows off her diploma folder.

The moment he’s seated again, he turns his head to the side, seeing your faint tears streaking your face. On instinct, he reaches for your hand before he can second guess it and laces your fingers together with a gentle squeeze. A pitiful laugh slips out from you when you look back at him, a blubbering smile parting your lips.

Javier leans closer to you, centimeters from your ear to confide, “I think you did an amazing job raising our girl, amor. Thank you.”

In the back room of a local restaurant, the Peña extended family mills about, filling the room with sound from the music over the speakers and everyone chatting and catching up with each other — especially congratulating the guest of honor.

Aunts and uncles and cousins that were available have all flocked together to celebrate Liliana, and despite the overwhelming urge to Irish exit this party because of the constant comments and questions about Colombia, Javier is staying until you’re ready to leave. Which undoubtedly will be until the end of your reservation.

He sits at one of the tables pushed to the side of the room, sleeves rolled up to expose his forearms and crossing his limbs over his chest as he reclines in the wooden chair. Buttons of his shirt have been undone post-photos with the grad, the air conditioning cooling his sun-baked skin. His fingers can still feel the phantom of your linen dress, his hand affixed to your lower back in all of the photos taken.

Easily, with a quick scan of the room, he finds you talking to his mamá’s sister, Tia Rose. You’re smiling brightly, the crinkles at your eyes showing off your joy as his aunt surely is congratulating you or complimenting you on how you raised your daughter.

He really meant what he said at the ceremony. There is no way he could have done what you managed if you were the one to have left for work. You were a fucking hero to him, not himself. He’s been hearing it over and over every time he returns home — “You’re a hero, Javier.”

It’s complete bullshit.

His results were rigged, the system played him as much as he supposedly played it.

When he thinks about being a hero, he doesn’t think about anything close to what he’s done. He thinks about sacrifice, compassion, strength — you have it all. You’ve saved him from himself time and time again, and you’ve done it all while being a working mom and dealing with your partner, your co-parent, being thousands of miles away for years.

“Ay, mijo, estás tu cabeza en las nubes otra vez? (Son, is your head in the clouds again?)” Javier looks up to his right at the sound of his father’s voice, standing to offer him help into the chair next to him but waved off with a grumble from Chucho.

“Is it that easy to tell, Pop?” he asks, a half-hearted smile on his face as he retakes his seat.

“Eh, to me, yes. Probably to your girls, too, but I think anyone else would think you’re doing your sulky, pendejo act.”

“Pendejo act? Don’t think it’s an act at this point, Pop. Been feeling like one more and more.”

“Sí, y por qué es eso? (Yeah, and why is that?)”

“Estoy ausente (I’m absent.)”

“Dios, Javier…” his father sighs and shakes his head, turning his head to look at his son, “You are not absent. Quit telling yourself that, or you really are going to be. You’re home now, so be home.”

“It is a blessing to have Liliana at home for this summer, spend as much time as you can with her…And you know how I feel about mi nuera (my daughter-in-law).”

Javier sighs, leaning forward to rest his forearms on his knees and find you in the crowd again. As if you can sense his eyes on you, you turn toward him and give him a tender smile that quells his near constant nervous energy.

God, it’s unfair how beautiful you are.

And how kind, and forgiving, too.

This conversation is making him want a cigarette. Really bad.

Instead, he pulls the plastic packet out of his pocket, popping out another chiclet of gum and tossing it in his mouth.

He prepares for a lecture from his father; Chucho seems to know a lot more about you these days than Javier. Every week since he left for Colombia, you’ve gone over to Chucho’s house for dinner at least once. With Liliana away at school, you still went. It filled Javier’s heart with a syrupy, oozing warmth whenever he thought about the relationship you have with his father. How you 're always going to be family, a daughter to him, after your parents cut you off those twenty-something years ago.

“She’s still coming over every week, y’know. Didn’t seem to be doing too great until about two weeks ago. Came over after she received a phone call. Was all excited and basically bouncing off the walls. I asked her why, and she said she got some exciting news. You know what it was?”

“Qué?”

“You coming home. I think you called to confirm your flights with her, and she was just so excited, mijo. Cooked your favorite for dinner that night—“

“Pollo asado?”

“Sí, con mole.”

“Mierda, estoy celoso. (Shit, I’m jealous.)”

Chucho laughs from his belly, shaking a bit in the seat as he reaches up and adjusts his cowboy hat.

“It was delicious, as always,” Javier hums in acknowledgement before his father continues, “But I’m not telling you all of that just to tell you what I had for dinner. I’m telling you cause I need you to get your head out of your ass and talk to her. Anyone with eyes can see how in love with her you still are. I wanted you to know that there’s something there for her, too. Hazla mi nuera de verdad. (Make her my daughter-in-law for real.)”

“I’ll talk to her, Pop. Don’t need a wingman, so please don’t say anything to her. Please.”

Chucho stands and shrugs, nonchalantly closing with, “If you don’t do it soon, I’m taking matters into my own hands and telling her myself how lovesick you are. I will not make any promise I cannot keep, so you better keep that one if you don’t want me involved, mijo.”

Javier stays put as his father filters into the party-goers, shaking his head as he smiles to himself.

Maybe he does still have a chance.

The end of the night was fairly uneventful, everyone saying their goodbyes and final congratulations to Liliana. You insisted on helping to set the room up as you had all found it, correcting the tables and chairs back to their usual positions. When you were about to start taking dishes back to the kitchen, Lili rolled her eyes and walked out to the front of the restaurant while Javi grabbed you by your hips from behind and physically directed you out of the room.

“Jav, I feel bad, we made a mess! Let me help!”

“Esposa, you are wonderful and so sweet, I’m sure they appreciate your help. But this is a restaurant, cariño, and you don’t get paid to work here so I don’t think they’re gonna want to be liable for you,” he slides his hands up and down a few inches of your sides, dragging the fabric of your dress up and letting it fall back when he takes his hands off of your sides, placing one on your back.

Javier helps you into the cab of his truck, you taking the middle of the bench and Lili following into the passenger side to be able to get out easier. He drives over to Lili’s house, dropping her off with both of you giving massive hugs and final congrats for the day.

It was a quiet car ride to the hotel, but you ended up back in the middle seat closest to Javier, leaning your head on his shoulder.

Walking into the building, he bit the inside of his cheek as he brushed your hand with his, no recoil from his touch giving him the confidence to take your hand completely in his. Fingers intertwined as you both got in the elevator, tender, unspoken words in your eyes.

Now, Javier sits at the edge of the bed, a short plastic cup in his hand filled with half a mini bottle of champagne. There’s a matching cup in your hand, standing in front of him as he looks up at you with worshiping eyes.

“Cheers, Jav. Good on us for getting our kid through college,” you say with a smile, the sound of plastic crinkling in your hands following your little toast. Each of you takes a sip of the drink, Javier leaning around you to set his down on the desk. His hands move to hover at your waist, your permission granted with a small step to stand between his opened legs.

Javier’s calloused palms catch on your dress again, inching the fabric up as his tongue pokes out to wet his lips. He looks up at you while you return the stare down at him, your free hand finding the curls at the nape of his neck.

“Thank you, amor. For taking on so much more responsibility and shouldering the weight of raising Lili Pad in her teens, and getting her into a great school, and supporting her throughout these last four years when I couldn’t—

“Jav, it was both of us.”

“No, please let me give you the credit you deserve, esposa. You did it all without ever being angry with me, and you always supported me, too. And every time I’ve come back for a visit, you make it seem like I never left with how welcome you make me feel.”

“You’re always a part of our family, Jav. Always.”

He nods, feeling his chest tighten at your words, gripping you tighter as if you’re going to slip away, as if he’ll wake up and this whole trip will have been a dream, as if he will be stuck in Colombia, or forced to go back to the DEA and work in Mexico.

“Thank you, really, thank you for always making me feel a part of it all from so far away. All the photos, all the letters, the birthday cards, and care packages…You are a great mother, and an even better woman. So much better as a person than I ever could be, and I am so lucky that you chose me to have a kid with. Lili is incredible because she’s part of you. Thank you, amor, you have given me a life I don’t think I deserve.”

His head drops, tugging you closer to rest his forehead against your stomach. Silence blankets the room, your fingers running through his hair soothingly. After a moment, you take his chin between your index and thumb, turning his head up to look at you again.

Javier wants so badly to be able to read your mind right in that second, the look in your eyes puzzling him. As he opens his mouth to say something, anything, to fill the air, you’re folding forward and catching his lips in a kiss. It’s light, too faint for his needs, and you’re pulling away much too quickly. His spine elongates, chasing your mouth before you can get too far and locking you in a breathless exchange.

His hands paw at your sides, a desperate attempt being made to pull you as close as possible while also running his hands along your curves. In the surprise of it all, getting lost in his lips, you drop the cup in your hand. Champagne splashes onto your feet, ignored as Javier lifts your mid-length dress to your hips, climbing back on the bed and pulling you over him without breaking your kiss.

Your knees cage his thighs in, settling on his lap as he slots his lips around your bottom one, tracing along it with his tongue. Parting with a gasp, your mouth opens to let him in, melding your tongues together. A whimper escapes from you when he tugs you further onto his lap, feeling his bulge in his slacks press against your core.

Javier pulls away from your lips, dragging his nose along your cheek and leaving a trail of wet, open mouth kisses along your jaw. At the spot on your neck close to your ear, he sucks a mark, smirking against your skin when your back arches and squeezes your chest against his.

“Fuck, Jav…” you sigh, fingers tangling into his hair.

He hums against your skin, pulling away and kissing under your chin.

“You’re so beautiful, amor. I missed you so fucking much. Thought about you all the time.”

“Yeah? What did you think about?” Your voice is  shaky when Javi drops his hands to your hips, starting to drag them back and forth against his cock straining against his zipper. 

“Mm, thought about how good you smell all the time, how sweet you taste…how much I miss having you in my bed every night. Being able to have you when I need you,” a groan slips from his mouth at your moan, moving your hips faster the more he talks, “I thought about how fucking stupid I was to leave someone like you behind. Mi vida, la luz de mi vida (My life, the light of my life)…felt like I left half of my soul when I went away.”

From above, you lean down to catch him in a passionate kiss, breathy exhales and muffled moans exchanged while your fingers work as the buttons on his shirt. Javier leans forward, shrugging off the materials before his arms are around you again, snaking around your back to grip your ass.

“Jav, I missed you so much. Never felt the same, there was always something missing…I always needed you. I always need you.”

“Mi amor, lo siento (My love, I’m sorry). I’m here now. Never leaving again.” His hands roam to your sides, finding the zipper of your dress on his left and pulling it down. He bunches the skirt of it in his hands and slowly takes it off over your head; he’s faced with you sitting in his lap, no bra and only panties on.

As if magnetic, his hands fly right back to your sides, skimming up until his thumbs lay under your breasts, fingers splayed along your rib cage.

“You’re so beautiful, mi amor, so fucking beautiful. Can I make you feel good, baby?”

“Please, Jav, need you so bad.”

“Oh, baby, mi esposa, I’ve got you. Get on your back, cariño.”

Javier watches as you move off of him and fall back onto the bed, the plush duvet sinking underneath you and pillowing out at your sides.

An angel in the clouds.

No more time is wasted as he tugs you to the edge of the bed, kneeling on the floor and booting your legs over his shoulder to open you up.

“Wait, Jav, here.” You twist to the side and stretch to reach for one of the pillows, giving it to him with a thoughtful smile.

“For your knees, viejo. Not a twenty year old athlete anymore, hon.”

Javier rolls his eyes and moves to kneel on the pillow, already feeling better in his joints from the cushion. He wraps his arms around your thighs and nips close to your panties, rolling out a groan.

“Sometimes, I hate when you’re right.”

“That’s ‘cause you always have to be right, Peña. It’s always been th—“ you trail off into a moan when his fingers prod through your wetness, one hand hooking your underwear to the side.

“I don’t always have to be right, esposa. You know you’re the boss out of the two of us,” he winks before he tugs your panties off of your legs, settling back between your legs.

You nod, sitting up and leaning your weight on one arm to look down at him.

“Mhm, glad y’know your place still, Jav,” you tease as your other hand pushes his hair away from his forehead, a smirk mirrored onto his face, “Make me come, mi esposo.”

You can see his eyes darken, breaths shallowing. Feather light kisses scatter across your inner thighs until he reaches your core, pursing his lips and blowing cool air against your wetness.

“Fuck, cariño, guess you did really miss me. So fucking wet. All for me?”

“Javi,” you whine, scooting your hips closer to him, “Please, need you.”

“I know, baby, I know. I can see how much you need me.” He licks one long stripe from your tightest hole to your clit, groaning at the taste of you. “You want me to play with your sweet pussy, mi amor? Make you feel so good?”

“Please, please, Jav.”

He soothes you with circles on your lower stomach, nodding as he lays his head on your thigh, “Don’t worry, baby, I’ve got you.”

Before you can beg out a response, his lips are attached to your clit, sucking hard before laying his tongue flat against it, moving slow circles around.

His muscle memory guides him to fall into the pattern that he memorized to get you off with his mouth and fingers, pushing one of his thick fingers inside of your cunt knuckle deep and stroking against that same spot he knows drives you wild.

Your back arches off the bed, pressing your clit into his tongue harder. He slurps up your wetness, sighing at your familiar taste that he missed so much. Another finger is added, the rhythm of their thrusts building up faster and faster. Right at the edge, your fingers tangled in his hair tugging hard, he switches positions, tongue plunging inside of you and fingers rubbing quick circles into your clit. Before you can even register, you're coming around his mouth, flooding his tongue and his lips.

“Javi, oh my god, fuck me…”

He leads you through the orgasm, pulling away with a boyish smirk.

“That’s kind of the plan, hermosa. Gonna fuck you.”

You roll your eyes, beckoning him to stand up. Sitting up fully, you strip him of his slacks and boxers, briefly taking him in your mouth before he’s pulling you off of him and pushing you further up the bed. Climbing over you, a heady kiss is shared as he settles between your legs. In the moment, you easily get him onto his back, moving to straddle him as he looks up at you breathless. Large hands hold tightly to your thighs, jaw dropping as you grab his hard cock and easily slip him inside of you, sinking down until he’s full hilt.

“Fucking Christ, amor. Take my cock so well, show me what you can do.”

Your hips find a slow, aching rhythm that makes you both breathless. As you continue to grind yourself around him, you lean forward and press yourself against his torso, skin sticking to skin.

“Jav—Javier, you are such a good man. I never doubted how much you loved me. How much you do love me,” you breathe out, hips faltering for a moment before you recover.

 “You were always there for us, and I’m so proud of you for going after what you wanted. Making the world a better place…” you move your hips slowly as you ride him, leaning down to press your foreheads together, stuttering but managing to get the words out for him, “You are a great man and an even better father. I couldn’t have chosen a better partner. I love you.”

Javier whimpers and stutters out a moan when you move your hips faster, your hand on his chin keeping his forehead against you. He squeezes his eyes shut for a moment before opening them, facing you and him whispering back, “Te amo, te amo, te amo. I love you so much, mi esposa. Mi amor. Te amo siempre.”

The sound that leaves you at that moment, hearing his proclamations of love, flips a switch inside of him. The primal need to make you his again, completely. His arm around your hips grips you tighter, feet planted on the mattress behind you. He uses the leverage to meet your rhythm with his own thrusts, sweet sounds slipping from your lips egging him on.

Your nails dig into his shoulders and he looks up at you in awe as you arch your back, head falling to the side as your face scrunches up in pleasure.

“Oh, fuck yes, yeah. Right there, ohmygod, papí…”

“Fuck, that’s right, baby,” he says in a drawn out exhale, hammering his hips up into you, “Say it again, mi amor. Say it again.”

“Papí—Feels so good, papí.”

“Yeah? Haven’t heard that one in a while, baby. Love it coming from you, say it again. Please, baby. Por favor.”

“Papí, papí, papí…Harder, please, want it harder.”

“Anything for you, mi amor. I’ll give you anything you want. Fuck this pussy however you want it, whenever you want me.”

One of your hands drops from his shoulder to the mattress, bracing yourself from his unrelenting pace. You’re a whining mess, opening your eyes and looking down at him under you, sweaty and glistening with his wild hair and mustache shiny from your come. Javier rumbles a loud moan of your name, on the verge of a growl when he feels you clench around his cock. 

“Come for me, mi esposa. Let me feel you…” he pulls you flush against him as he fucks up into you, lips brushing your ear as he whispers, “Te amo, mi esposa, te amo. I love you. Love you so much.”

“Pa—Papí, fuck! Oh my god, Javi!” Your head rolls back as you come around him, bounces faltering as you slip against his chest like jelly.

“Fuck, baby, gonna fill you up. You want me inside you all night, mi amor? Want me to make you full of me again?” His lips brush against your ear, whimper and nod in response.

“Yes, yes please, papí. Want you inside.”

“Fuck yes, mi amor. One more time for me, say it one more time.”

“Come inside me…please come for me, papí.”

A moan stutters in his throat as he buries himself fully in you, twitching with each rope he spends. Grip tightening around you, he stays inside of you as he kisses you deeply, pulling away to brush your hair away from your face.

“You have no idea how long I have been wanting to do that again, mi esposa. Te amo, hermosa. I love you.”

“I love you too, Jav. Missed you,” your head lays on his chest, sigh warming his sweaty skin, “Will you be around when we’re home or—“

“Mi amor, you’re gonna have a hard time keeping me away from you and Lili now. I wanna spend every moment I can with you both. My girls.”

It’s a Sunday evening at the Peña ranch, a few weeks after Lili’s graduation. You and her have come over to Chucho’s house for dinner, Javier already there from working the day with his father. He’s mostly over at yours in the evenings, coming over to spend time with Lili, and you, staying for dinner, having movie nights, grilling out. He’s been basking in the slow life, the life of a father that he’s been so desperately craving. It’s been an itch like he has for a cigarette, finally taking an inhale and his nerves melting away as he adjusted to a balance with you two.

Tonight, however, Chucho insisted that you and he keep your weekly get-togethers, despite Javi being home for good now, and the four of you have had dinner around the cozy dining table off of the kitchen. Javier is gathering the dinner plates, Liliana standing to help him clean up.

“Anyone want any dessert? What d’ya have here, Pop?” he looks between his father and you, awaiting an answer.

Before Chucho can say anything, you sit up with a quiet gasp, “Oh, do you have any mangoes, Chuch? I really would love some mango with Tajín. Or some strawberries with honey. Or both.”

You grin up at Javier and he laughs, nodding his head.

“I’ll see what I can do, amor.”

“Y’know, mija, my Lucia always had mangoes around the house when she was pregnant with Javi. She would slice them up and put so much Chamoy and Tajín, you could barely see that it was a mango underneath it all.”

“That honestly sounds perfect right now, I bet Lucia made some kickass mangonadas, too,” you laugh softly, looking up behind you as Javi squeezes your shoulder lovingly.

“Oh, she definitely did. Whole family begged her to make them every time we all got together,” Chucho belly laughs fondly at the memories, nodding to himself, “We thought for the longest time that we were going to have a girl. All Lucia craved were sweets or fruits, and there’s some old wives tale, una fábula, that if your cravings are sweet, it is a girl, and if they’re savory, it’s a boy.”

“Huh, how funny. Guess thinking back, I did crave a lot of chocolate ice cream with Lili.”

“Oh god, I remember being kicked in the middle of the night and having to go to the town over cause they had a 24-hour gas station just to get you some Ben & Jerry’s,” Javier laughs, kissing the top of your head as you shrug.

“And now look, you’ve got the sweetest daughter to ever exist. All thanks to me,” you grin, sending Javi a wink as he finishes gathering the dishes from the table.

He sees his father smiling to himself as Chucho leans back in his chair, Javier retreating to the kitchen to find something for dessert for you while Lili washes up and the two of you at the table strike up some conversation.

Later that week, you gave Javi a call and asked him to come over after he was done on the ranch. He agreed immediately, of course, and couldn’t fight the buzzing excitement he felt to see you again. It took him back to those days before Lili, before the two of you were ever really anything, you calling and asking him over to your dorm room or your apartment. He felt like a giddy teenager again.

He showered quickly and changed before heading over to yours, parking in the driveway of your small three bed house he had bought for you all. At the door, he knocked before using his key to get inside, calling out to you.

“Amor? Lili Pad? Anybody home?”

The pad of footsteps on the tile floors catch his attention, a smile stretching across his face as you come around the corner into the entryway. He kicks off his boots before meeting you in the middle, arms wrapping around you and holding you tightly to his chest. He sighs an exhale, relaxing around your warmth.

“Long day, Jav?”

“You have no idea, mi amor. Had to chase a fucking bull that got loose in the pastures when we were trying to corral all of ‘em. My ass is hurting from having to ride the horse so much.”

You laugh into his chest, pressing a kiss to his shirt before leaning back to look at his face, “Oh your poor butt. You wanna sit on the couch then?”

He hums in confirmation, kissing the top of your head before you lead him into the living room and let him flop down on the sofa.

“Where’s Lili Pad?”

“Oh, um, she’s out with friends tonight. Thought it could be just us…” You join him, sitting with a couple of feet between you two. He can see how tense you are, sitting up straight, fiddling with your fingers, placing a pillow in your lap. Extending an arm out, he holds his hand palm up for you to take.

“I’m more than okay with just us, cariño. What’s going on with you? You seem anxious. Everything at work okay? Everything okay with Lili?” He rubs his thumb across your knuckles after you take his hand, brows knitting with concern.

“Yeah, yeah. Everything is great with Lili. And work is, well, work. No complaints…” your eyes stay trained on your hands together, swallowing before you speak up again, “I actually think it would be easier to show you.”

He feels even more concerned and confused as you stand up, disappearing out of the room for a moment before coming back with a hand behind your back. You don’t sit again, opting to stand in front of him; you bring your hand forward, passing the object to him.

It takes him a minute to register what it is, the last time he saw one this up close being about twenty something years ago.

A pregnancy test.

A positive pregnancy test.

Positive.

“Think we could do as good a second time around?”

You’re pregnant.

He’s going to be a dad again?

He’s going to be a dad again, with you?

He’s going to be a dad again. He gets to have another child with you.

His heart is beating out of his chest, mouth dropped open with no words coming out.

A shake of his head knocks him out of the shock, setting the test to the side and looking up at you with welling eyes.

“I get to be a papá again? With you, mi amor?”

A beaming smile widens on your face, your hands finding the sides of his head as you nod down at him.

“Yeah, honey, you’re going to be a dad, again. Lili’s gonna have a little brother or sister. Much, much younger,” you say with a chuckle.

Javier laughs a little breathless, eyes flickering between your face and your stomach that is eye level with him.

“Oh my god, oh my god, mi amor—Te amo, te amo siempre,” His hand finds her tummy, roaming around in circles, attempting to feel the familiar bump or any side of his baby growing inside there. Soft kisses litter your torso as he pulls you closer, resting his forehead against your ribs.

“I love you too, Jav,” you push back his hair and he stares up at you in wonder, pulling you gently to sit in his lap, “Do you…I mean, I want you to come home. Maybe we can actually get married this time. Have the family life with Lili and the little baby. I know we used to just joke about our fake city hall marriage, but I’ve always wanted that with you, Jav.”

A soft, tender kiss is shared, the two of you holding onto each other. One of Javier’s hands rests on your stomach, his heart already completely overflowing with love for the person growing inside of you. It’s quiet for a moment, both of you sitting with each other in silence. With another kiss, Javi hugs you, your head resting on his shoulder as he whispers in your ear.

“Graciás, mi amor. Thank you — for never giving up on our family. On me. Thank you for giving me everything I could have ever dreamed of. I can’t wait to have another baby with you, they’re gonna be as perfect as you, and Lili. My girls. Te amo, mi esposa, te amo siempre.”

javi's photo board in colombia <3

tagging mutuals that might be interested??

@northernbluess @swiftispunk @johnwatsn @cannolighost @joelsversion @cupofjoel @darkroastjoel @atinylittlepain @beskarandblasters @wannab-urs @jksprincess10 @bearsbeetsbeskar @smokeinherperfume @thetriumphantpanda @atticrissfinch @perotovar @mrsquill @javiscigarette @yazsos @deathwife @pr0ximamidnight @undrthelights @lunapascal @ladamedusoif @haylzcyon

#javier #writing #javier peña x f!reader #javier peña x female reader #javier peña x reader #javier peña x you #javier peña fic #javier peña fanfiction #javier peña fanfic #javier peña smut #javier peña fluff #narcos fic #narcos fanfiction #javier pena x reader #javier pena x you #javier pena x female reader #javier pena x f!reader #javier pena smut #javier pena fanfiction #javier pena fic

[lovebytheoutlaw]

Can you do NSFW/SFW headcanons for Javier? 👉👈 i am out here begging for content with him

You've kept me waiting, anon! *evil smirk* I love writing for Javier! He's probs my fave to write for! There definitely isn't enough content with him, and I am happy to provide!

Javier sfw headcanons

*nsfw under the cut ;)*

Such a gentleman! Helps you on and off your horse; holding your waist from behind when you're doing chores, kissing your cheek, and whispering sweet nothings in your ear. Just making you feel so safe, loved, and wanted

If you want, he'll teach you guitar! He's quite patient, especially when it comes to you, and a great teacher! Same if you asked to learn his native tongue. He'd appreciate your desire to learn and the thought of being able to converse with only you two understand each other at camp excites him

If he's having a bad day, he most likely won't talk about it right away. Instead, he'll ask you to go fishing with him, leading to you two sitting by the water silently until he's ready

Constantly making you melt with pet names! 'Mi amor', 'hermosa', 'querida', 'carino'. Serenading you, locking his eyes, full of love, as he plays just for you

Compliments you every day! "That outfit looks gorgeous on you", "You look so pretty in the firelight", "That color really brings out your pretty eyes" SUCH A FLIRT

*Wearing his poncho he gave you earlier that day* "Woah, where'd you get that poncho? I have one just like it! It's quite nice, right? *wink*"

Sarcastic banter back and forth, laughing when one of you runs out of comebacks

Kissing you before he leaves for a job you can't come with for, promising he'll be safe, kissing you when he returns, and cuddles you to sleep and again when you wake up

You can always make him laugh, even if your attempt at such was lackluster. He's so smitten by you!

Warm hugs, very good at comforting you, will listen to you talk about anything and everything, accepting of who you are, and protects you if you need it

Javier nsfw headcanons

*cracks fingers, stretches back* let's get it

CW: nsfw, sexual themes, knifeplay, degradation

Skillful fingers, not just on his instrument, but on yours as well! (If ya know what I mean) He'll catch you often staring at his fingers when he plays, or when you two are sat at a table. Purposefully tapping his fingers on said table, letting you know he noticed

He loves making out, pulling your bottom lip between his teeth, sucking on your tongue, moaning low into your mouth

Obviously, knifeplay. As long as you're comfortable and consent to it! Dragging the blade lightly up you body, the cool metal on your skin making you shiver. Holding the knife to your throat (gently!!) as he thrusts achingly slow into you. He also likes you wielding the knife some times too when you're in the mood to be dominant.

Never makes you do anything you aren't comfortable doing. Sets up safe words for the both of you. A TON of communication before anything happens

Turns you on just with his words. He's an expert at flirting, so it makes sense he would be at talking dirty as well! Soaking yourself just from him growling naughty things in your ear that when he reaches down there, he smirks, "Already wet, mi amor? All for me?"

Possessive af. "Who's this pussy/hole belong to? Say it." Marking you up, bruising your skin with his mouth, and fingerprints blemishing your hips

Javier has a stamina out of this world when it comes to sexual activity, and the sex drive of a rabbit. He'll fuck you anywhere and everywhere. All day, any day. Against a tree, at the campfire, in your tent, a hotel. Even a stagecoach after robbing it once. You guys don't mention that one much

Praises the hell out of you! "My good girl", "you're doing amazing, hermosa". However, he also likes to mix in degradation some times if you're into it~! "Take it like a good girl", "look at those pretty tears", "mierda, I love using that beautiful hole"

Slight humiliation, like making you bark, or putting you in embarrassing positions for his pleasure. Loves overstimulation

Loves making slow, sexual, intimate love to you as much as he loves rough fucking. Holds you close, kissing every inch of your skin, taking his time on you, relishing in your elongated moans, and caressing your face. "Te quiero, mi vida"

Aftercare is never skipped. He cleans you up, letting you rest (you need it after that), bringing you water, holding you and asking you if everything was okay, if there was anything you didn't like. Falls asleep with you in his arms, your face in his chest, legs intertwined

#javier #javier escuella #javier hc #javier headcanons #javier escuella headcanons #javier escuella hc #rdr2 #javier escuella smut #javier escuella rdr2 #javier rdr2 #javi #i love himb

[fuckyeahpedropascal]

Pedro boys relationship matrix

I don't remember how exactly this idea came to me, but this turned out to be a very fun matrix! Thank you those who contributed their knowledge to this idea! Commentary below the cut.

• Masterlist •

Related posts:

Pedro boys as Spice Girls (R)

Pedro boys smoker matrix

Pedro boys underwear matrix (R)

Single AF

Javier Peña, Din Djarin, Pero Tovar, Young!Joel Miller

The first three are single AF because of their jobs. Javier is a workaholic in a dangerous job, Din's ship fits one person and one Grogu, and Pero isn't in a position to take a wife as a travelling mercenary.

Young!Joel gets a special shoutout. He doesn't have time to date because he's working hard raising his only child as a single dad on top of running his contracting business, and that's hot AF 🫠

Committed

Dieter Bravo, Oberyn Martell, Frankie Morales, Javi Gutierrez

There was a bit of debate around as to whether Frankie is married or not. As @imaswellkid points out, he calls his partner his "lady", not wife or missus, and he doesn't wear a wedding ring. To me, he's in a committed relationship, but not married.

It's Complicated

Silva, Joel Miller, Tim Rockford, Ezra

So this category is half canon and half conjecture. I haven't seen Strange Way of Life yet, but I think we can all agree his relationship with Jake is complicated. As is Joel's with Tess.

I headcanon that Tim's in an on-off relationship because he comes off as a workaholic (the takeaway in the precinct is a clue) who can't commit, while Ezra is so hard to pin down that it would inevitably be complicated with him.

Divorced/Widowed

Marcus Pike, Max Lord, Marcus Moreno, Jack Daniels

Thank you @elvenmother for pointing out that Marcus Pike and Max Lord are divorced and that Marcus Moreno is widowed. I will forever mourn my beloved cowboy Jack's wife and unborn child 😭

Married

Dave York

I cannot believe Dave is the only married Pedro boy out of the bunch. This man looks damn fine with a wedding ring on. Hopefully we get more married Pedro boys in this year's upcoming projects!

#pedro pascal #pedro pascal characters #pedro pascal cinematic universe #narcos #javier #pena #the mandalorian #din djarin #tlou #the last of us #joel miller #triple frontier #frankie morales #game of thrones #oberyn martell #equalizer 2 #dave york #kingsman golden circle #jack daniels #agent whiskey

[lohcness]

pookie bear javier practice :D

#javier escuella #javier #red dead redemption #red dead redemption 2 #rdr1 #rdr2 #fanart #art

[dutchieliciousplans]

He's gay, he's gay, he's bi, she's a lesbian and he's gay

The most of the vanderlinde gang are just hiding in one big closet. You can't convince me this is just a LesbianGayBi club going on around the campfire 😌.

#rdr2 #red dead redemption 2 #red dead redemption community #red dead fandom #red dead redemption #dutchieliciousplans #camp fire #clemens point #happy hosea fucks friday #hosea #hosea mathews #simon pearson #pearson #bill #bill williamson #bill marion williamson #javier #javier escuella #karen #karen jones #vanderlinde gang #van der linde gang #vanderlinde gang 4 life #red dead 2 pearson #red dead 2 bill #red dead 2 javier #red dead 2 karen #red dead 2 hosea #red dead 2 #red dead redemption photography

[chubbysciencenerd]

∘°♡ Making It Up ♡°∘

Oral!fem/male receiving, fingering, rough sex, hair pulling, degrading slightly, nature/public/ outdoors, fem!first oral

̇ ̟ ෆ︵‿୨♡୧‿︵ෆ ̟ ̇

╭─ ⋅ ⋅ ─ ✩ ─ ⋅ ⋅ ─╮

Javier promised to take you out fishing because you hated being cooped up at camp with nothing fun going on. You were talking to Sean as javier comes over and places a hand on your waist, “you ready to go fishing?” You answer excitedly “Yeah! Of course lets go!” You look at Sean and mumble a “sorry gotta go” and give him a apologetic smile before following Javi. He brings you to his horse, he stores the poles and bait on the horse before he gets on then proceeds to help you. You wrap your hands around his waist enjoying the connection between you two, he starts to ride out of camp. “So what made you want to go fishing of all things?’ He asks glancing back to get a glimpse of you. “Mainly because you’re always talking about it and its a nice time alone.” You knew you still had to pay him back and I thought that this could be the perfect opportunity. He laughs before speeding up.

Soon enough you were there, he gets off the horse then carefully helps you down. You look around and the spot was just absolutely beautiful. He comes up behind you with the polls. “Gorgeous isn’t it?” He says softly in that sweet voice of his. “Yeah, yeah it is.” You look at him over your shoulder before placing a soft kiss on his lips. “So answer me something mi amor, {my love} did you really want to come out here to fish?” You blush a little knowing damn well that was kinda true, at the same time you did honestly want to learn how to fish. “Half and half” He smiles kissing you again. He pulls away from you as he puts the rods and bait back on the horse. He tells you to stay there as he takes the horse into the trees a bit before tying him up to the tree. He comes back down and pulls you into a kiss placing his hands on your hips. You start walking backwards, as your back hit a tree Javier pushed you against it keeping you locked in place as the kiss starts to turn sloppy.

You slide your hand to his chest carefully feeling it before slowly dragging your hand down. You reach his heat as he pushes against your hand. You break from the kiss and move your head into his neck before you start leaving soft kisses, eventually turning into love marks and you didn’t care who saw them. Javier groaned as he took his hands to unbutton his pants, he was clumsy but made great haste. He slides them down with his boxers, and you quickly got to work stroking his length. He pulls his neck away before grabbing the back of your hair and dragging your head into a kiss. You push him forward a little staying with him, you turn him around and push him against the Tree. He lets go of your hair and pulls away. He stares you in your eyes panting, “please querida {darling}…” You kiss him before sinking down to your knees looking up at him as you tease him by slowly stroking his length teasing the tip with your thumb. He gasps before covering his mouth and trying his best to not toss his head back. He watches you full of lust.

You place a kiss on the tip before trailing kisses down his shaft. You drag your tongue on the under-side of his length up to the tip, you take most of him down your throat quickly he laces his finger through your hair as he unexpectedly starts bobbing your head on his length you squeeze your eyes shut as you bring your hands to his thighs gripping them tightly. You gag a few times when he first started but you quickly got decently used to it. You look up at him with tears in your eyes and god did he love it, watching you choke on his girth helpless. You both knew that if you needed to stop you tap his leg but you were more than fine as of now. He throws his head back mumbling some Spanish curses into the back of his hand, he soon after quickly pulls you off of him before pulling you back up to the ground. He spins you to where you are now in front of the tree, you knew exactly what was happening as this is what you guys had done a while outside of camp. You bring your hands and hold onto the tree as he drops your skirt down to your ankles, before you can even realize he shoved his full length in and started thrusting at a fast and hard pace. You could tell he had been holding back for a while with the way he was ramming into you, the thrust were sloppy and with no rhythm. He laces his fingers in your hair pulling your head up to hear your sweet sounds clearer.

“Di mi nombre! {Say my name!}” Javier shouts speeding up the pace slowly starting to lose whatever little rhythm he did have. “Javi! Javier~! You reply shakily, you were growing close and starting to grow overstimulated. With a few more sloppy thrust javier finishes quickly pulling out to avoid a pregnancy, especially with you two not knowing how far you want to take this relationship. You felt empty as he pulled out but he was quick to pulling you up and you burry your back into his chest. He places a soft kiss on your head and a few by your ear before whispering, “Did you finish mi amor? {my love}” You tiredly shake your head. “Let’s fix that then, shall we?” You look up at him over your shoulder as he kisses you before turning you around to face him. He picks you up as you wrap your legs around his waist he carries you to a nearby large rock, he sets you down on it before he gets on his own knees in between your legs. You didn’t know what he was about to do as all of the men you had been with in the past had no care about your own pleasure. He kisses up your thighs switching thighs each kiss before he gets to your heat, your face was beet red and oh did it get redder as his lips connect with your skin.

His mouth made quick work exploring your soaked folds adoring the taste, he groans into it sending vibrations to your body. You fall flat against the rock as he continues, you bite your hand knowing anyone nearby would hear you if you didn’t. His tongue starts to focus on your clit, your thighs tighten around his face as he found a new way to please you. You bring your free hand up to grope your breast almost to distract yourself so you could feel the pleasure longer.

Javier soon adds two fingers quickly curling them in and out to hit your sensitive spot, all of the things combined were driving you crazy. You felt like you were in a complete different reality, one where it was only you and him. Your toes curl as your thighs tighten around his head once again, your legs start to shake right as you finish on his face. He doesn’t stop but he slows down, your juices are too hard to resist. After he cleans you up as best as he can, he gives one last lick on you sensitive bud and your legs twitched as he did and he chuckled looking at the mess he made of you.

He gets back up picking you up and kisses you quickly on your forehead. “Are you alright? Was that too much?” You gave him a soft smile, “it was amazing.. I’ve never had a guy do that before. Thank you Javi.” He places a soft kiss on your lips before taking you back over to the tree. You hold onto it as Javi helps you back into your skirt, it was difficult when your legs felt like jello. He put you on his horse and rode you back to camp, he carries you to your guys tent as your half asleep. He puts you in your cot and covers you with his blanket, “I wish I could stay with you but I have.. things I need to deal with in town” You look up at him softly and nod as if you’re telling him that its fine, you were too tired to talk and it didn’t take long for you to fall asleep.

╰─ ⋅ ⋅ ─ ✩ ─ ⋅ ⋅ ─╯

(Im sorry if this isn’t as good as my first one, I’ve been having trouble sleeping pls lmk if you have any request for characters, kinks, etc. I do not write mlm as I would feel uncomfortable writing it as I am not a male. Ty for understanding and plssss tell me what i can do to improve!!<33)

P.s.[I love you and thank you for reading :)]

#rdr2 #rdr2 community #rdr2 fanfic #javier smut #javier escuella smut #javier #javier escuella #smut #red dead redemption 2 #red dead redemption fanfiction #red dead redemption community #red dead redemption x reader #x reader #red dead fandom #red dead oc #red dead redemption imagine #red dead redemption two #red dead redemption roleplay #red dead redemption fandom #red dead fanfic

[tgedphotos]

Chapter 402 - “Glorious and Gratifying (2)”

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#novel image #tged #tged spoilers #lloyd #javier #duo