@jakelogic
Ok let's talk about the beautiful vibe of your blog first. I got to know you 6 hours ago, and I'm so happy i did because dude, You and your arts are just awesome.😩🦋
I can see that you're a very friendly and nice person, I really like your personality! uwu
Now the drabble~🌼
Art blocks
Jake duskwood x Artist!mc
Gener: fluff, crack(kinda)
Putting the pencil aside, they stared at the small sketch they have made in the past hour. It wasn't much and it needed to be worked on a lot, but they had the feeling it was going to turn out awful.
"I mean, come on. A simple couple? That's just lame" they looked at the sketch for the second time and sighed in defeat. Closing the sketch book, they got up from the chair and jumped straight to the empty bed. "Why can't I think of anything??" Whining, they rubbed their forehead to calm themself down.
After a while of Silence, the sound of the door creaking open was heard. They looked up, seeing their partner and fiance, walk in. "Something's wrong, love? I heard you groaning...- wait, are you sick? Do you want some tea? An extra blanket maybe? Or-"
Cutting him off with a laugh, they shook their head. "It's nothing Jake, just.. y'know, art blocks."
"Oh.. sorry" he blushed a little because of his little judgement. "Can I help you.. in any way?"
They looked at him with a smile. "Not really, unless you are willing to pose~"
He blinked a little, trying to analyse their words. "...you mean you want me to be your model?" He was willing to do it ofcourse, he just had to make sure first.
"Ofcourse silly, that is if you want"
"Well, if it's going to make you feel better, I'm in!"
a few moments later
"Is it too late to say I'm out?" He stared at himself in the mirror, as he tried to not get blind by the bright colour of the dress he was wearing.
"Sadly for you, yes." they brushed his hair a little, gently making the curls disappear.
"Y'know, I really hate you right now"
"I love you too, dear"
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Duskwood AU "Criminal On The Loose."
Chapter 1 (M) "Feelings."
Taglist: @jakelogic @crow-chaos @i-desire-jake @jakeismylover @digital-corruption @pennyl4n3 @saddah-mo @booklover-01040 @rw47vr-key7vr @red-writes-stuff @layanasstories @zmayadw @hacked-by-jake @spookycolorpeanut @leverageduskwood @lyricsofravensong @juan-nonetheway @robbybarnes @lois-carroline @captainwanderlust78 @jake01040-duskwood @silentblogsstuff @youngphilosophertragedy @slow-hazel @sasnayaandra @lem-onchan @futaba-01040 @duskwood-fandom @aisling-things @oceanipebble @withjake-blog @duskyducky @roxiuuu @duskwoodx @miraculous-duskwood-girl @riaduskwood @nala-raines @lyon-amore @justubi @renneiscent
!TW: Bad words, Medical drugs/Drugs and mention of Self-Harm (Flashback)!
*Jake’s POV*
I'm in the car, with a cigarette in my hand, parked in a parking lot. Disgusting.
I'm dirty, my mouth is just sticky from the smoke. Adorable. My hoodie is dirty with smoke residue. Disgusting. My mind cannot forget about my past. Again, disgusting.
I feel like one of my fathers, who takes drugs until he has lost all consciousness and sees reality slip out of his sight. Because he is, he has spent his life smoking as if it is the only escape and a band-aid from all pain.
...That's it, sort of. In fact you know what it does, the dangers of only consuming one cigarette.
But, I just do it. Why? Just two words, life sucks.
No, not always. Only those who see life as lousy live it as lousy. And because of that, I don't have a good life. Because I passed it only as if I were the spectator.
Yet when I was a little boy I couldn't control my emotions, so I couldn't do anything other than impose pain on myself. Scratching until I felt a bittersweet in my mouth. 'A quick remedy' in fact.
Poor little boy, emotions hurt, huh? This is why I have learned to ignore them, not to take them into consideration. If I do, will I suffer? Yes, as always. I can't let emotions win. Yet emotions hurt so much but they are indispensable, because if you don't listen to them, everyone automatically considers you a robot. Without emotions and to be thrown away.
Why does no one understand why I don't listen to my emotions? Easy. Hating a child is automatically being emotionless.
Yet that little girl is the result of an infidelity, the mother and father confirmed it. As my parents did more than once.
Even though my emotions tell me to get close to her, it looks like that little girl is pointing a gun in my forehead.
Disgusting.
She just has to be alone from me.
Without thinking I smoke again, now the smoke comes out of the window while I am in a state of 'Your wound is healed, for now!'.
From just one breath, they become five and so on.
I can only do one thing, hold a piece of paper in my fingers, not a normal piece of paper, a letter.
Jessy gave it to me. Best friend of that bitch.
As soon as I read and reread the last line, I just wanted to throw up from all the emotions I had in my body:
—
Dear Jake,
I wanted to end it, I already had the pills in my hand in my room. I just wanted to forget the pain, but it seemed too much to ask. Still, I was in front of the bar.
Needless to say, to forget the pain, I turned into a doll for him. He could bite me, he could slap me, I didn't care. It was nice.
And when it's done...It's done. Perfect, thanks phil! We will not see each other again, because I am no longer anything to him but only a sex toy...But that's okay! Bye!
But...Oops, forget about the protections.
We're running away from the government, needless to say they found out about me being pregnant. I had feelings for Jessy, but oops she told the group. Answer? Only for my protection and baby's.
And phil? Straight to jail, the group served him to the police on a silver platter. He was just a traitor to them.
But...Now I don't have a husband and a baby in my arms. I gave birth in very bad conditions. I give birth on the ground and almost die.
She's a little girl, I call her Azure. Yet I don't want her.
To recap...I have a little girl in my arms that I don't want, the hypothetical father is in prison, ‘my’ group and I are wanted all over Duskwood and at the moment we manage in a Bunker.
What should I do? Obviously run away and leave the child to the group. I spent my whole life running away from problems, like you. I've spent my entire life with a classic: 'Oops.' Just like you.
Yet I can't raise my finger at you, because you were in prison and maybe even dead.
So, we are tied. Traitor. :)
- Summer
—
I just wished the emotions at that moment hadn't left me, worse than believing what I read.
What the fuck?
She can't really have said that... 'All a misunderstanding' like she seems to be saying this, or like she is spitting in my face that everything she is doing is justified because I did it too when we knew each other as children.
No, she is not a child anymore. Grow up arrogant bitch.
Yet why does she seem to not give a shit but act like a goddamn selfish person?
I literally slide off the seat, I only feel my dry mouth with the letter between my fingers.
Damn it.
Although it is pitch dark, I see a silhouette in the shadows.
Jessy?
I see Jessy climb up and open the car door.
Wait...How long have I been here?
-"Jake! It's full of smoke in here!" She exclaims as she coughs.
He steps aside, just to let the smoke out.
I didn't know what to do. I bow a little and rub my eyes without thinking.
-"What were we doing before?" I asked. Fuck how stupid I am.
She frowns. -"Excuse me? We've been here for hours!" She gets in the car and with a bang closes the door. -"We are on a mission!"
-"Oh. Right." Respond by looking at her, although I don't have a mirror with me I can imagine my gaze darkening.
She looks at me confused, -"What happened?"
-"Is irrelevant." I answer.
-"Jake." She begins, in a slightly sarcastic voice. "I don't know you well, but you understand that something is wrong."
I sigh.
I see with the thing in the eye her looking at the paper between my fingers, I was so concentrated that I have completely forgotten about the paper.
Quickly, she takes the paper.
-"Jessica!" I exclaim and try to snatch it from her hands.
Despite this, I somehow manage to pick up the sheet. We looked like two children.
-"What is that??" She faces the letter with a lot of curiosity.
-"A letter, but it's none of your business." I rolled my eyes.
-"It's not from..." She slowly pulls away from my arm. -"...About Summer?"
I look at the void. -"Yes."
She doesn't say anything. -"I left you the letter..." She begins, "I was hoping you wouldn't find out."
-"What?" I raised my voice.
She looks up, completely scared. She gets defensive and mumbles something. -"Wait! She betrayed me too!"
- "This does not mean that you have to make me unaware of everything!" My hand slowly turns into a fist.
-”I’m sorry! But I thought you might want to look for her...You were on time!" She tries to justify herself, as if the light is now the dark.
-"Much worse!" Growl, how the fuck does this bitch afford?
I approach with a stiff fist, she takes my sweatshirt with one hand and squeezes it. I sharpen my eyebrows and she seems to be asking for mercy only with her eyes.
-”Jake! Stop! She never loved you!” What she says is a fucking sword of truth in my heart, fuck it.
As soon as she says those words, my heart punches itself. It is frustrating, it is true but above all I have never had hope with her and Jessy knows it.
I sit on the half-broken seat, a tear falls from my eye and I cover my face with my hands like a hedgehog.
-”What…What did I do wrong…She never loved me even if I wanted her heart too much…I did a lot for her…?” My voice is completely broken, like a glass jar. It echoes throughout the car even if it is extremely low.
Jessy never seems to have seen a boy cry, my dad would be disappointed in me. I look at her, her pale green eyes lightning mine.
She hugs me.
-"I'm sorry, Jake." She whispers in my ear and squeezes her arms in my neck.
I tried, tried a lot but my efforts were in vain. She never loved me, and she didn't hide it as she hid on her prairie when we were little.
I close my eyes, my throat is completely dry but I still try to let go of the stress.
As I always did when I was adolescent, but I cut myself and sometimes I still use it...I did it because the stress was deadly and I couldn't deal with it. Maybe I'm happy to be an adult, or maybe not.
Even though I am now known as a criminal, with a gun in his hand and a heart at the bottom of his body. I accept destiny, like a child without parents in a street...Without a home and a destination, but maybe the destination I want to reach comes from my heart.
The love that has not been returned, and never will.
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