#ive made a list of things for my boy. hes just been in the same

[justmeinadaze]

Aftercare Part 2 (Steddie X You)

A/N: I had an extremely ugh day (couple of days actually) so Ive been living in this fic, writing it out lol Enjoy it <3. I feel safe with them.

Part One Here

Warnings: Dom Steddie and Sub Reader and all that implies (I regret nothing!) , Spanking, DP, mentions of previous bad past relationships for the reader, Smut and fluff. No angst today my friends.

Word Count: 4275

It had been a few days since your tender incident with your roommates Eddie and Steve. The day after they took care of you, you found yourself incredibly sore, not just between your legs but your ass and wrists as well. 

The continued to look after you, changing your bandages and icing the swollen area of your limbs. Today they both had to work so your plan for the rest of the afternoon was to put on one of Steve’s shirts and cocoon yourself in Eddie’s bed while you waited for them to come home.  

As you entered Steve’s room, you found yourself looking at it with a completely new set of eyes. The smell of his cologne hung in the air making you dizzy as your memory floated to him sitting on the edge of the bathtub caressing your thighs. Your fingers ran across his dresser as your grinned at the pictures you passed of the three of you together. On his desk were some applications for jobs he had been looking at including one at his father’s firm but thankfully he hadn’t filled that out yet and you hoped he never would. 

Yellow notepad paper caught your eye and you reached over to bring it closer to you so you could read it. 

Sexy things I think Y/N would enjoy:

Spanking (The correct way!)

Restriction/ Handcuffs (Eddie may have some that won’t hurt her.)

Daddy? (This is more for me and Ed. I know it turned me on hearing her talk like she did.)

DP ( I think she’d love to have us both inside her especially with how fucking tight she is…) 

I know she said she likes it rough. Eddie said he had some ideas of things he did with other girls. I don’t think she wants us to really hurt her…I don’t know. I should ask her…

Edging ( I just want to hear her beg me in that little voice to allow her to cum)

Role play? (She loves scary movies. I bet she’d love Eddie and I pretending to stalk her and then using her.)(Seriously that thought got me ridiculously hard!)

You smiled as you read his list. The men you tried this dynamic with were always pretty selfish, focusing on their own pleasure instead of yours. Steve seemed to genuinely care about you and your feelings; they both did and always had. 

Picking up a nearby pen you scrawled a note of your own on the bottom. 

All of these sound fantastic, Stevie! Or should I say Daddy? ;).

Reaching into his closet you grabbed one of his button up shirts, giggling as you wrapped in around your naked skin. He was so much bigger than you were, his shirt feeling like a nightgown as it touched past your knees. It made you feel safe, as if he was there right now with his arms around you. 

You pleasantly sighed as you left and headed to Eddie’s room. The metalhead was night to Steve’s day. Where Steve’s room was neat and organized, Ed’s was a complete disaster. His room had a cologne smell like the other boys but it was hidden under is signature smell of cigarettes with a dash of weed.

Even the pictures he had of you three were slightly different. All of Steve’s were from outside in the sun whether it be at the beach or a school event you guys had attended in high school. Eddie’s were from nighttime activities like after one of his shows at the bar or a heavy metal concert outside of town. 

You grinned as your finger’s ran over his guitar. God, you loved watching him play. The way his eyes zeroed in as he focused on the notes or the way his fingers moved across the strings… Fuck. A small moan left you at the memory of those same fingers thrusting inside of you. 

As you sat on his bed, one of his composition books bent into your thigh. You opened it expecting to find doodles and notes on his next D & D campaign but were surprised to see song titles. 

Y/N’s Mixtape 

No One Like You- Scorpions

Little Lover- AC/DC

Rock Me- Great White

Why am I not better at this?! 

I don’t want them all to be sexual! I need to ask the guys. 

-Learn to play Def Leppard 

I want to play a song for her on stage and I know she likes them.

Photograph or maybe Animal?

Not Pour Some Sugar! Too cliché!

It took you awhile to find anything to write with in Eddie’s room so you settled on a marker you found under a pile of clothes. 

“You got some kinda hold on me You're all wrapped up in mystery So wild and free So far from me You're all I want, my fantasy.”

Your grin grew as you turned on his stereo and Metallica lightly flowed through the speakers. Finding a spot in the middle of his bed, you curled up into a ball, hugging his composition book to your chest as you slowly drifted off to sleep. 

##############

The bed dipped by your side, followed by the notebook gently being pulled from your grasp. 

“Did she write something in it to?”

You kept your eyes closed so you could hear what they would say when they thought you weren’t listening. You could hear the subtle smile in Steve’s tone as he asked Eddie his question who responded with an equally happy sounding voice. 

“Yeah, she did.”

“What does yours say?”

You felt a calloused palm tenderly pet your head, pushing your hair out of your face. 

“I wanted to play something on stage for her. I thought she deserved something special after what she went through…has been through with those other assholes. She provided a suggestion.”, he grinned. “What about yours?”

“Shit, dude. What I was working on wasn’t as romantic as yours.”, Steve chuckles. “I, uh, wrote down some things I thought she’d like to try…in bed, you know? Especially since no one seems to be doing it correctly. I still can’t believe she didn’t know what aftercare was.”

“Yeah…what did she write? Hell, what did YOU write?!”, Eddie laughs at his friend. 

“She said she liked them all especially, um, calling us Daddy.” The bed gradually dipped on your other side as he lowered his voice. “Dude, that little voice she spoke to us in—fuck—I’ve been jerking off to that sound for the past few days.”

You tried so hard to hold it in but it was impossible to catch the heavy, pleasure filled sigh that escaped your lips. 

“Hey Harrington, did your list mention touching her while she slept?”

“Naw, Ed, it didn’t. I think this sweet girl would hate that we made her feel good and she wasn’t awake for it.”

“Very true. We can think of it like a punishment for snooping around our rooms and taking your shirt without asking.”

“I wasn’t snooping.”

“Oh shit, Munson. Would you look at that. She’s awake.” You slowly open your eyes to meet their beautiful smiling faces. 

“I just wanted to be close to you guys since you were both gone.” Sitting up, you lean your cheek on Eddie’s shoulder. “I missed you two.”

“How are you feeling, sweetheart?”

You excitedly flash them your wrists. “Much better! And I can definitely sit normally now.”, you giggle.

“Did that prick call you?” Steve sighed when you shook your head. 

“Probably won’t come around again until he’s horny.”

“Well, he’ll have to go through us so…” A wicked grin spread across Eddie’s face when he noticed you exhale again. “You really like us being protective over you, don’t you?”

“I like knowing that I’m safe and cared for.” Your head hung in shame. “I’ve never felt that before.”

Steve’s fingers hooked under your chin, lifting you to face them. “You’re always safe with us. We would never make you feel unwanted or unloved.”

That giddy feeling from the other day returned at his words as you shuffled your shoulders and beamed with pride.

“Can-Can we play?”

The metalhead chuckled as he turned to Steve. “She’s so polite. I love it. Which makes me wonder…Y/N, were those other guys just hitting you to hit you? Like with your idiot, why did he spank you with a belt?”

Your eyes narrow at him as his choice of words for your now ex-boyfriend. “I told him I wanted to try something rougher so he said he could spank me.”

“But that’s not you, is it, sweetheart? I mean you’re not into that sado-masochistic stuff. No judgement if you are.”, he grins. 

“No, I don’t want to be hurt like that. I just…like being controlled… and punished if I do something wrong.”

“Like going through our stuff when we aren’t here.”, Steve replied.

“I wasn’t going through your things! I just—”

Eddie interrupted you by roughly grabbing your jaw. “Didn’t sound like to me he was asking but telling you that you did something incorrect. For a pretty girl that’s so polite, you should know it’s not ok to touch other people’s property when they aren’t there.”

The action of him grabbing you and talking the way he was had your pussy clenching as you felt yourself slowly dropping. 

“I’m sorry. You’re right. I did a bad thing.”

“It’s okay, honey. You’ll learn.” Steve smiled as the metalhead loosened his grip. His eyes were constantly scanning your face for any discomfort. You seemed to be enjoying yourself so far so Eddie continued. 

“Do you have a safe word you prefer?”

“I usually use Red. I mean, I haven’t used it yet but…”

“Tough girl. Can I ask you something and I want you to be honest?”

“Yes of course.”

“Have you wanted to but you felt embarrassed? You said last time that fucker hit you too hard sometimes. Why didn’t you use it?”

“It’s not that I feel embarrassed… I don’t want to seem weak…”

They both heavily sighed but Steve couldn’t help himself as he climbed further up the bed and collected you in his arms. 

“Y/N, we know you’ve been through a lot. Not just with guys but with your family to. You’re not weak if you need to stop because you feel uncomfortable.”

“Promise us, princess. If at any point you feel uncomfortable, unsafe, or anything like that, you will say that safe word. No matter what we will still love you.”

“I promise.” To add emphasis and lighten the mood you do the “cross my heart” gesture along your chest making them laugh.

Eddie crawled up the bed as well till he was shoulder to shoulder with Steve. “What do you think, Harrington? Should we let this descension slide just this one time?

“I mean, little girl needs to learn the rules and respect us, right?”

“I-I respect you…”, you mumble. 

“Hm. I don’t know, baby. Maybe just a small punishment, Munson. Just to let it really sink in.”

The man nods and motions for you lay your head on his lap, adjusting you so you stomach was across the other man’s thighs and your ass accessible. Steve tugs your panties down your legs, gently running his palm over the soft flesh. 

“These cuts do look a lot better, Y/N. You said they don’t hurt anymore?”

You shook you head aggressively before responding in a tone that had both boys subtly groaning. “Eddie took really good care of me.” 

“Yeah, he did.” A small yelp left your throat as his hand came down on your backside. It wasn’t hard but meant to tease while making sure you were okay. “How did that feel, honey?”

The metalhead brushed back your hair from your face as your nails dug into his jeaned leg. 

“Good. S-s-so good.”, you moaned. “You can spank me harder i-if you want to.”

Steve didn’t do it immediately, choosing to run his hands along your skin before finally rearing back and delivering a much harder smack that had you pushing up on your arms. 

“Do you like that, princess? Do you like Steve spanking you?”

Your eyes practically roll out of your skull as he does it again a bit harder. “F-fuck, yes I like it.”

“Say it correctly, babe.”

*SMACK*

“Mmm—I like Steve spanking me.”

“Jesus… here, Y/N. Don’t…don’t move.”

The man slides out from under you and you hear sounds behind you of him shuffling around before something clanks loudly to the floor. 

“Again, didn’t take long for Harrington to get naked.”, Eddie chuckles making you smile as he continues to play with your hair. 

Your hips are abruptly lifted so your lower half is more exposed for him on your knees as he firmly spanks you again before his tongue suddenly licks between your folds. 

“Steve! Oh my god…”

“It’s ok, baby. You’re ok. Remember, you’re safe with us.”, Eddie coos. “As sexy as you look, I’m going to slide this shirt off you.” 

You lift up on your hands again, helping pull Steve’s shirt over your head as the boy behind you continues to aggressively devour you, moaning into your cunt as he strokes his length. 

Pulling back, his palm comes down on your ass and you mewl as your head falls back down to Eddie’s lap. One of his hands reach underneath you to grab a handful of your breast as the other pushes his tongue back inside of you. 

“You really are so beautiful, sweet girl. You deserve to be treated right.” His fingers caress your nipples causing you to moan as he gently tugs on the erect bud. “Do you want that? Do you want us to take care of you and make you happy?”

“You…you both have—fuck—have always made me…happy.”

Your answer genuinely makes him smile. “Not like this, sweetheart.”

Your mouth falls open in a silent whimper as you cum, body collapsing as you twitch with pleasure. Sighing, you feel yourself being lifted and wrapped up in Steve’s embrace again. Your eyes remain shut as you inhale him, forehead pressed to his neck as they both tenderly praise you. 

“I want you both…to feel me at…at the same time. I don’t think it’s fair for the first time we’re together one of you has me first.”

“Who said we were going to fuck you tonight?” Your eyes meet Eddie’s playful ones, glimmering with mischief. “I mean, you misbehaved and then, I don’t know about you Stevie, but…” He obnoxiously stretches his arms wide. “I had a LONG, stressful day.”

“I did to, Ed. There were so many rude customers and we were SO busy. I kept thinking ‘Gosh I can’t wait to come home and just crash on my bed ALL ALONE.’”

“Oh, come on! Like you haven’t been thinking about fucking me for the past few days.” You crawl off Steve’s lap and climb into Eddie’s, straddling his waist. “I have ever since I saw you both naked. I kept thinking ‘How could I have known these men for so long, lived under the same roof even, and had no idea their cocks were that big.’”

The boy underneath you exhaled through his nose at your words, feeling his dick get unbearably hard against his jeans. Your palms glided down his chest, raising off his shirt before leaning forward to place delicate kisses along his shoulders and neck. 

“Please, Eddie. You both deserve to feel good to. Make me yours.”

The metalhead practically growled as he crashed his lips to your own. Effortlessly, he lifted you off him, passing you to Steve who was more than happy to pick up where his friend left off. 

“Have you ever done this before?”

“Not at one time. I have had anal but…”

The man’s fingers tenderly lift your chin. “It didn’t feel good?”

Your own fingers run through his hair as you place a kiss on his lips. “Not with him but I trust you two.”

Steve grinned as he held on to your waist, shifting his body down the bed till he was flat on his back. A now naked Eddie pounced back onto the mattress making you laugh before licking your lips as you watch him pour some lube into his hand and stroke it along his cock. 

“You ready, honey?”

You nod as Steve grips the base of his own cock, allowing you to descend onto it at your own pace. Even with just the tip of him inside of you already full.

“Steve…fuck…”, you moaned, lowering yourself further. 

“Yes, baby, you’re doing so good. Just…take your time. Y/N, I…”

“T-tell me, please.”

“I’ve never felt a pussy this fucking tight before. Fuck me, Ed. You don’t even know what you’re about to experience.” His words had you fluttering around him making him groan until you were fully seated on top of him. “Don’t fucking move. I swear I don’t know how long I’m going to last.” His newfound gruff tone had you clenching again, leaning forward on your hands as Eddie gently pushed you down.

“Oh yeah? You like hearing me tell you what to do?”

Steve watched as your face scrunched together as Eddie gradually began pushing his dick into your ass. 

“Jesus Christ.”, he grunted under his breath. 

The other man grabbed your throat, pulling you closer to his face. “I asked you a question, little girl. You want to play rough you have to show respect. Now…” They both thrust their hips into you roughly at the same time eliciting an obscenely beautiful moan from your lips as your forehead fell on his. “Do you like hearing me telling you what to do?”

“Y-yes, Steve. I-I-I like it.”

His hand snaked around to the back of your neck, bringing your lips to his as they began thrusting into you. Eddie’s palm slid up your back, intertwining his fingers in your hair as he yanked it back. 

Steve looked up at you with half-lidded eyes swearing he had never seen anything or anyone so perfect. He had always hated the way people in your life treated you. To him, you deserved the world but he had always been so scared to make a move. He was terrified of losing you and at least as your friend and roommate he could keep an eye on you, protecting you while being there when you needed him. 

Eddie spanked you hard and you whimpered at the feeling as he leaned over you to kiss along your shoulder; his ear closer to your lips so we could absorb those gorgeous sounds coming from them. The metalhead struggled to get along with anyone but could always connect with you and Steve. You always made him feel like a person and not the freak everyone thought he was. There was that level of insecurity within him though that felt you could do better than him. He always wanted to tell you how much he truly loved you but, like Steve, was so scared of losing you. 

Truth be told, they needed you as much as you needed them. 

“Fuck me…I’m gonna fucking cum. Do-do you feel comfortable with us—”

“Yes!”, you cut Steve off. “Fuck yes—mmm—please. Fill me up, Daddy.”

“God fucking hell—”, his voice strained as he tightly gripped your hips, trusting into you roughly as his spend released inside of you. 

Eddie wrapped his arm around your chest, pulling you up against his own as his fingers reached between your legs to rub your clit. 

“Cum, pretty girl. Fucking squeeze us both as fucking hard as you do. Come on, baby.” He kept urging you as he pumped faster.

“What-what should I—fuck—call you? Are you Daddy to?”

“I’m whatever you want me to be, princess. As long as you do what I say.”

Your arms clung to his as you placed your lips against his ear. “I know—mmm—you’re an amazing…dungeon master. Do-do you want to be my master to?”

The moan that left his throat was too much for you as your eyes closed and you came. Eddie soon followed, pounding into you roughly till he grunted against your skin and released his seed inside of you. 

The three of you collapsed on the bed, panting as you tried to catch your breaths. As Steve started to stand however, you quickly reached for his arm. 

“Don’t leave!”

“Whoa! Hey, honey, it’s ok. I’m not leaving. I was just going to get something to clean you with because I assumed you wanted to lay here for a little bit before taking a shower.”

He could still see the panic in your eyes until Eddie’s arm slid under yours and pulled you tighter against his sweaty chest. “It’s ok, sweetheart. I’m right here. You’re not alone.”

“Did you wanna take a shower now?” The metalhead chuckles as you nod, Steve smiling as he lifts you into his arms. “Maybe we should do it like this till she gets more comfortable.”

“I’m sorry.”, you pout; afraid your making things too difficult.

“Baby, there’s no reason to be sorry. Now, Eddie, on the other hand should be sorry for how much of mess this fucking bathroom is.”

Said boy who had been getting the shower ready, stood to his full height and playfully squinted at his friend. “Excuse me. Rude. I like my bathroom. I know where everything is.”

“Yeah, on the floor.”

You giggle at their banter as you step into the tub. “I don’t mind your bathroom, Ed.”

“THANK YOU, princess.”

After both men follow you in, you stand still allowing them to clean and take care of you. There was a vast difference between this time and last time. The biggest one being while they had been rough with you there wasn’t any lingering intense pain. You ass stung where they had spanked you but it was a good burn that had you softly sigh as you leaned back against Steve’s chest. 

You were already sore between your legs and your ass but it was a dull, lingering pain that you knew would have you constantly thinking about them and how good they made you feel. 

That garbage feeling you had come to know after each sexual encounter wasn’t present here. All their attention was on you and as they continued to care for you, you felt your brain slowly return and leave that previous headspace you were in. They never pushed you or made you feel rushed. Because you had felt so heavy and collapsed in his arms last time, Eddie always kept his hand or arm on your waist just in case. 

If you happened to feel that clingy impulse, you would rub your nose into Steve’s chest and he would smile softly as he held you to him. After you and they were clean, they quickly dried you, shoved a shirt over your head, and jokingly tossed you back into bed.

Eddie chose to remain naked, lighting a cigarette as Steve thew on some boxers before laying on either side of you. 

“Fuck. Look at me being a dick. Y/N, is it ok if I smoke this close to you?”

“It’s fine, Ed. I don’t mind.”, you grin. There was a comfortable silence that feel over the room as you laid together. Your smile grows as you place your hand on Steve’s chest. “Um, so I’ve never done roleplay or any other punishment type stuff before but I’m opening to trying anything you suggest. Just nothing too violent… like don’t punch me or anything.”

“Who wanted to punch you?!”

“No one! I just… I’m still learning…”

“Sweetheart, no one should be punching or kicking you.” Eddie raised his arm and you lifted your head to rest on top of it. “Did you like what we did here?”

“Yeah!”, you exclaim a bit too excitedly making them chuckle. “I, um, I didn’t hate the belt with my ex. I just—he just—”

“It’s too hard. Y/N, is that your way of saying you’d like to add that into our thing here?”, Steve smiles coyly. 

“I think as long as I’m with you two, I’ll like anything you try.”

Eddie squished the cigarette into the ashtray, rolling onto his side to face you. “Is it ok if we try, maybe, taking you out to dinner or a movie?”

“Eddie, of course. I love hanging out with you guys.”

“That’s not what he means, honey.”

“Oh…”

“Before you said you didn’t want this to be a one-time thing but you didn’t actually say if—”

“You wanted to be our girl or just do this.”, the man gestures around the bed. 

You scoot your body further down the mattress and grab Eddie’s cheeks as you place your lips on his. As you roll over, you do the same with Steve before settling down fully in the metalhead’s embrace. 

“’Our girl?’ Is this the 60’s? Are you going to give me your jacket pin, Steve Harrington?”, you teased. 

“If that’s what you want, pretty girl. Hell, I’ll do whatever I have to do to show the world how much I love you.” His tone dropped to a more serious register as he reached out to caress your cheek. “WE love you.”

Eddie lightly gripped your jaw, turning you to face him. “We do. Now I don’t have a jacket pin but I can tattoo my name on you somewhere.”

“No!”, you laugh as his fingers tickle up your sides. “I love you to. I’d love to be your girl."

#steddie #eddie munson #stranger things #steve harrington #joseph quinn #fan fiction #eddie munson fluff #eddie munson smut #joe keery #steve harrington smut #steve harrington fluff #daddy steve harrington #sir eddie munson #steddie x y/n #eddie fanfic #steddie ask #steve stranger things #aftercare #aftercare is important #steddie x reader #steddie smut #steddie x you #steddie fluff #steddie fanfiction

[amhrosina]

I Wanna Love Me The Way That You Love Me

(Frank Castle x f!Reader) - Hurt/Comfort

MASTERLIST // JOIN MY TAG LIST

Summary: Frank uses a mirror to remind insecure!reader how beautiful she is. (In a fluffy and a smutty way!)

Warnings: reader is not very kind to herself, fluffy frank, like FLUFFY frank!!!!, super soft!boy frank, the softest of franks ive ever written, some body descriptions but I tried to keep it super vague, (later on) whew chile smuttttt, fingering, frank makes you watch yourself come in a mirror (lmfao), frank is sort of a dom but in the loosest sense, frank just loves reader so much!!!!!)

A/N - Thank you to @wheredidiputmyfish for being an absolute doll of a beta reader!!! I have a couple more Frank fics otw (i cant help it, i love that stupid man) and a poly!fratt x reader one hopefully soon after that!

You huffed as you pulled the green blouse over your head, annoyed that yet another online purchase didn’t fit right on your body. Just this week alone, you’d already made two trips to the post office, and Frank was bound to ask questions if you went for a third time so soon.  

You couldn’t even remember why you’d started buying nicer clothes to begin with, except that Karen always looked nice and Frank had been in love with her at one point, so why wouldn’t the same concept apply to you? The only problem was that you couldn’t seem to find anything that fit you correctly, and the idea that Frank might grow bored with your everyday attire kept you up at night. And of course, Frank had never actually said anything about your clothing choice – this was just the overthinking part of your brain going into overdrive. 

You flopped onto the mattress, shoving your face into your palms and groaning. You couldn’t figure out exactly what Frank saw in you, and it was hard not to compare yourself to his late wife or Karen. They were both beautiful women – definitely Frank’s type – and that was not exactly how you’d describe yourself. The thought of it brought tears to your eyes again. You quickly blinked them away when you heard the front door shut. 

You joined Frank in the living room, where he was removing his boots. You threw the package you needed to return on the table by the door, and though you tried to do this casually, Frank noticed it and your expression immediately. 

“You sendin’ care packages to some other boyfriend or somethin’?” He teased, pressing a kiss to your temple. 

You giggled. “No. It’s just another return.” 

“Not that I’m not supporting this new wardrobe thing,” he started, eyeing the package by the door, “but why are you returnin’ everything you buy?” 

You shrugged. “It just doesn’t fit right.”  

“I bet you look great.” 

“I don’t think so.” You shrugged again, avoiding his eyes as you stepped into the kitchen. 

“Sweetheart.” He followed you into the kitchen, though it was clear he was struggling to figure out how to broach the topic. “Is everything okay? You’re talkin’ down about yourself again.” 

Your smile faltered slightly. “I’m fine.”  

“Baby,” Frank wrapped his arms around your middle, pulling your chest into his, “You’re not fine. You wanna know how I know that?” 

You remained silent, avoiding eye contact, but nodded. 

“Because you won’t look at me.” You lifted your chin and stared into his warm gaze out of spite. “And because I know you and I love you, I know that you start avoiding me when you feel bad because you think I’m going to miraculously start to hate you and leave.” 

You didn’t respond, instead gnawing on your cheek and curling into yourself. Frank’s hold around your waist remained steady, and as you tried to look away from his meaningful gaze, his hand gripped your chin and held it steady, too.  

“You’re beautiful, baby.” He pressed a soft kiss to the tip of your nose. “I love you no matter what you do or wear or say. You’re beautiful.”  

You tried to push away from Frank, suddenly aware that you hadn’t fixed your makeup or hair that morning. He was lying. He had to be lying, right? No one thought that about you, least of all Fra- 

“Don’t.” Frank was gentle in his coaxing, running his knuckle over your cheekbone in a soothing pattern while pressing his fingers into the small of your back. “Don’t do that to yourself. I love you. I’m not goin’ anywhere. You have to trust me.” 

You fiddled with your fingers, wringing them together in an uneasy gesture, unsure of what to say. He gently grasped them and pulled them into his chest, cradling them as he held your gaze.  

“Come with me. I wanna show you somethin’.” He murmured, tilting his head toward the bedroom.  

You followed close behind him, curiosity outshining your desire to crawl into bed and never get out. He led you to a stop in front of the full-length mirror, resting his hands on your shoulders behind you. A clear and decisive frown formed on your face. The last thing you wanted to do was look at yourself. 

“What do you see?” he asked, holding your gaze through the mirror. 

“What?” You furrowed your brow. 

“What do you see, sweetheart? Be honest.” he asked again, patting your shoulders encouragingly. 

“Well, um,” you breathed, starting at the top of your head and making your way down with your observations, “I see dull hair, bags under my eyes, and a nose that’s too big. My shoulders are broad, my hips are too wide, my skin looks lifeless, and I’m wondering why you ever gave me the time of day and why you stay with me when there are so many people out there that would look better standing next to you.” 

Frank stayed quiet throughout your assessment, expression turning grave as you brought up your deepest insecurities about yourself. He let you finish your observations before pressing a long kiss to your head. 

“Now ask me what I see.” he prompted. Confusion overcame your features again, but he silenced your doubts with an encouraging nod.  

“What do you see, Frankie?” You quietly asked, unsure if you really wanted to hear what he had to say. 

He brought his finger to your face, tracing each element as he pointed them out in the mirror. 

“I see a pair of beautiful eyes and a perfect nose. I see the most sensual lips I’ve ever felt pressed against my mouth. I see a beautiful, strong body that can handle anything thrown its way. Remember when you had to carry me from the living room to the bedroom after I passed out? That shit was impressive, sweetheart.” A soft smile rested on his face as he continued. He folded his arms around your middle and pulled your body against his. “I see hands that hold my entire heart in them, and a body that has all my love. You’re beautiful, baby, and I love you so much. Every piece of you.” 

You tried to blink away the tears that clouded your vision, but Frank’s speech combined with his gentle touch and open expression sent a wave of tears down your face. You curled into his hold, turning so you could bury your face in his chest. He cradled you against him while you cried, pressing soft kisses to your hair every few minutes until you were calm enough to look up at him through your eyelashes. 

He swiped his thumbs through the tears that had gathered under your eyes. “Are you okay?”  

You nodded, blinking up at him. “Thank you. I love you,” you murmured. 

He pressed his forehead against yours, which had always been his way of showing love. “Anytime, sweetheart. You hear me? Anytime.” 

- 

Bonus Scene: In which Frank comforts you in the bedroom later. 

“Frank, what are you doing?”  

Your tone was a mixture of confusion and curiosity, combined with the lazy haze that had taken over your body for the time being. Frank had jumped up from his relaxed position between your legs, where he’d licked up every bit of your desire after making you see stars, and had begun fiddling with the floor length mirror across the bedroom. 

“Hang on.” He called over his shoulder, tugging the heavy glass across the carpet. 

“Why are you moving the mirror?”  

“Wanna try somethin’.” 

He stepped back, looking between your slick, bare skin and the mirror with a smug expression. You were now face to face with your reflection, and as soon as you realized Frank's plan, a string of fire worked its way directly to your core.  

“Wanna show you how perfect you are.” He crawled on the bed behind you, settling himself before tugging your body back against his. Both sets of eyes, yours and Franks, were focused on you, and boy were you a sight to behold.  

Your limbs, still shaky from your first orgasm were splayed out, giving both you and Frank the perfect view of your glistening cunt, which was busy clenching around air as Frank worked his needy fingers down your skin. 

“Shit, baby. You look fuckin’ perfect like this.” He breathed. The proximity of his warmth to your ear sent a wave of goosebumps down your body, and you had to fight the urge to clench your legs together. “Look at how beautiful you are, sweet thing.” He murmured, holding his gaze on the treasure between your legs. 

You looked, fully looked, and felt heat crawling up your neck as his sensuous fingers swiped through your arousal. A low groan emanated from his throat, and he couldn’t stop himself from circling your clit. You watched as a moan left your mouth, your back slightly arching against Frank’s chest.  

“You see how perfect you are, sweet girl?” He cooed, circling your clit again. “Your pretty pussy drives me crazy.” 

His other hand began to rub your nipple in light circles, and if that weren’t enough to have you gasping for air, the touch of his lips to the spot below your ear was. You squeezed your eyes shut, throwing your head back against Frank’s shoulder. His fingers halted – no, everything halted – and the whine that came from his sudden stoppage wasn’t entirely a conscious decision of yours. 

“You stop looking, I stop moving, sweetheart. You got that? Keep your eyes open.” he asked, locking eyes with you in the mirror. His gaze held no room for negotiation, so you shyly nodded before returning your gaze to your body. His focus remained on your flushed face, panting as he worked you closer to another orgasm.  

You could see what he was talking about. For the first time in a long time, the girl that looked back in the mirror wasn’t someone you shied away from. She was beautiful, and confident, and sensual, and she looked good next to Frank.  

“You look stunning, baby.” He murmured. 

“I know.” You responded, briefly lifting your eyes to his before returning them to his fingers. His winning smile was priceless – wide and open and beautiful, and you loved him, you loved him, you loved him. 

Light twinkled in your eyes as he inched you closer and closer to your release, and as soon as you locked eyes with Frank again, you were a goner. 

Frank worked his fingers around your clit, coaxing out one of the most intense orgasms you’d ever experienced. It washed over you in waves of fire, and it was a struggle to keep your eyes open for it, but you were glad he had asked you to, because you looked glorious coming around his fingers. 

You panted, body gleaming with sweat. Your heartbeat finally slowed as you leaned against Frank for support. He ran soothing hands over your limbs, massaging feeling back into them and kissing every inch of skin that he could reach in the process. The silence as you returned to your body was long, but comfortable, and when you finally had full use of your limbs again, you pulled Frank’s arms around you.  

He kissed your hair, resting his cheek on your head. 

“Do you see what I see now?” he asked, glancing at you through the mirror. You nodded, carefully lifting your chin so you could look at him – the real him – to respond.  

“I love you.”  

He grinned, leaning down and planting a sloppy kiss to your lips. 

“I love you, sweet girl.”

-

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[ilynpilled]

ive been thinking about this a bit and i feel like i have some very different feelings towards certain things and strongly disagree with the implications present in the ways i see them discussed. i do not like to simplify these themes to “vengeance/punishment bad wahh”, because it does not at all feel complete enough to convey my true feelings, or the themes of the text itself for that matter imo, but like… ofc i personally cant read things like cersei’s walk of shame, where she is punished, humiliated, and dehumanized through the one thing she was unfairly condemned for her entire life— jaime’s brutal maiming and torture where he is humiliated, fed things like horse piss which he forces down because he is so thirsty before vomiting it back up, gets repeatedly beaten unconscious, and is nearly driven to passive suicide— theon’s excessive physical and mental torment that would take too long to list that breaks him entirely— and even a man as deeply evil as vargo hoat (who is not at all three dimensional) having his hands and feet and arms and legs cut off, be cannibalized, and even be forced to eat parts of himself, causing the pov character that swore to enact brutal vengeance on him to feel ill and repulsed once he finds out— and experience much, if any, catharsis, personal feelings about these characters aside. asoiaf is a series where the author pretty often deliberately places us inside the heads of bad people that have done terrible things, who some readers may feel a certain hatred for, as they are put through torment. not to make the reader feel good and satisfied about it, but to present it as something that should not really be a thing that we revel in, and encourage us to be critical about what is even gained through what they are going through. even a morally dark antagonist without a pov like joffrey and his death was meant to have elements of tragedy. during, tyrion notes that he is a young boy with fear in his eyes that he had never seen in the eyes of his father. whether you feel a certain way about it (and i am not arguing that you are morally flawed for not sympathizing with a fictional character, this isn’t real life, i am just discussing themes that i am identifying), the goal was not really to provide us with a feel-good “justice at last!” emotion through the brutally violent death of a 13 year old boy. it makes me genuinely wonder how some ppl come away with the idea that this series is intended to be a celebration and glorification of punitive justice. i am not saying justice in general is not a huge theme, and some catharsis, especially for victims, over the death/defeat of their abusers & tormenters is present in the text as well, understandably so, because it can mean safety. take pia smiling through broken teeth when jaime has her rapist executed and presents his head to her while setting a precedent with gregor’s men. some people need to die, and deserve it, but what does that look like? who decides it? why? by contrast, the instance of jaime actually feeling good when he hangs a bunch of random outlaws reads as something more tied to his current relationship to the self and certain selfish desires at this point in his story than real justice, and it is further elaborated upon and taken apart in the book. anyway, all these questions are present and the answers are not near as simple as i often see them made out to be.

it doesn’t feel like to me that most things that can be interpreted as enactments of punitive justice or moments of karma are these epic events that should just make the reader blindly cheer and applaud, or even feel good about. there is a reason that some things go awry (like with oberyn), and it isn’t cynicism. there is nuance, and not in a way where victims are condemned for fighting back, or a pacifist ideology is idealized. there just really isn’t a glorification of brutal punishment, ‘eye for an eye’ vengeance, and the needless causing of suffering. same with a blind upholding of duty and law based around flawed feudalistic constructs. and all these things should not even be conflated. not to mention that punitive justice exists also in a way where it is connected to institutions. take the faith and organized religion for example. the whole process is interrogated: what is sin? what sins are being punished? how? why? and what are the actual effects? be it jaime’s and brienne’s conversations/interactions with a bunch of different tertiary characters in affc, or cersei’s punishment in adwd. at the end of the day, she is punished for her body, for being a woman. she does not suffer “consequences” for her actual wrongs and the suffering she causes. she doesn’t really learn anything, and it will all just make her spiral more. the whole concept of punitive justice gets focused on especially with theon’s entire identity being withered away through torture. he experiences so much torment that there comes a point where he is robbed of his mind and agency. what does the “criminal” learn? how can a person change in these circumstances? what is the point, and why should we feel good about this? he is not even really “punished” for his crimes, and certainly not by people with any moral high ground over him, he is just being brutalized. same is the case with jaime in asos: it is a bad person being brutalized by men even more vile than he is, and they are not doing it because they want to deliver any justice to his victims. also, though the maiming does kickstart crisis with him specifically, it is not the determining factor when it comes to his reformation. this story is not actually saying that people can be, and should be, tortured into becoming better people, and if they can’t the solution is to just axe them. there is nuance, sure, mercy is not something everyone is entitled to in all circumstances. sometimes “mercy” towards certain evil people will lead to the enablement of the suffering of others, even entire populations. there are certainly circumstances where compromise isn’t an option. but, again, i dont think george is ever holding back on actually interrogating the moral quandaries when it comes to identifying cycles and ending them, and he is for sure not treating every single aspect of these conflicts as black and white. even tyrion murdering his father, who purposefully does have a very ironic and humiliating death scene, which is important thematically, doesn’t end in easy and feel-good catharsis, especially for tyrion, which doesn’t equal “oh, tywin should be forgiven and spared”.

all of this is also why i do not really see how events like the fall of house lannister (first of all, we know it is gonna include the likely very brutal deaths of two innocent small children), red wedding 2.0, valonqar etc would be these grand and glorious moments of justice and pay-off, treated as just the good guys finally getting an epic W. they will very likely be filled with tragedy, so i am genuinely curious about where these expectations for this kind of catharsis come from

#long post #and by catharsis i mean reveling in their suffering and feeling like justice was served #valyrianscrolls

[honeyyjems]

SLIP ‘N SLIDE

content warning (s): porn with a bit of plot, cunning reader, a little reiner camo, threesome (f,m,m), brief oral (m receiving), soft dom!jean, hard dom!porco, slight size kink, public sex (pool bathroom), unprotected sex, exhibitionism, rough sex, hate sex?, degradation, praise kink, hair pulling, dirty talk, choking, asphyxiation, spitting, slapping, spanking, biting, fingering, finger sucking, overstimulation, pet name (sweet girl, pretty girl, baby), use of honorifics (sir), a bit of breeding and corruption

summary: you heard the hot lifeguards of the season knew how to give a good fuck, but you would rather see for yourself. Instead of chasing after the hot lifeguards of the season, how long would it take for them to slip and give in to the trap you set?

pairing: lifeguard! jean & porco x fem!reader

word count: 3.2k

a/n: this oneshot is for @taixju summer collab (x) , and i encourage you to read what everyone has made bc its vv good! also the summer is almost over for me, so why not go out with a bang. i decided to write content warnings before actually writing the smut… i was sweating!!! this is the most dirtiest thing ive ever written by far and i am proud but nervous.

banner credit: made it myself ;)

masterlist | requests | join my tag-list

The warm feeling of the hot sun hitting your skin and the smell of sunscreen was always nostalgic, especially during the summertime; hearing the splashes of people jumping into the water as you tanned was calming. What wasn't very calming was the feeling of two pairs of eyes burning into your skin, Jean Kirstein and Porco Galliard, the hottest lifeguards of this summer season.

Each summer season, there are new lifeguards, so they aren't always the same as the last, and they happen to be from the town over, so they were just here for the summer. This summer was going to be different from your last, you're not going to be the goody two shoes you've always been. If you want something or someone, there's nothing better than being a little devious.

Jean and Porco's wandering eyes have been on you since coming to the pool every day since opening, so their looks have not gone unnoticed. They were the hottest fuckers of the season, their toned abs and arms glistening in the sun from the sunscreen, but the cocky and flirtatious behavior attracted the woman and girls like magnetics.

You heard rumors that Jean and Porco knew how to give a good fuck, but you would rather see for yourself. They will only be here for one summer, nor will you see them again, so you can have fun with them while it lasts. Instead of chasing after the hot lifeguards of the season, how long would it take for them to slip and give in to the trap you set?

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

It was just a regular pool week, but not for you. Your bathing suits would get skimpy with each passing day of the week, no matter who it was, all eyes were on you. The boys didn't utter a word to you, but their actions spoke louder, the long stares at your tits and ass each time you walked by.

Finally, Friday came. Walking through the pool doors in your black Brazilian bikini set, Jean and Porco's eyes were glued to your breasts, bouncing with each step you took. Jean stood while Porco remained in his seat, gawking at you.

As you passed Jean your pool pass, he paused before taking it, “Don't you think your bathing suit is a little…” Before he can continue, you interrupt him, “A little what?”, tilting your head in mockery.

Jean reached for your card as he spoke, “You’re practically not wearing anything.” In response, you let out a taunting laugh, “Now wouldn’t you love that?” Before he could reply, you walked into the women’s bathroom, hearing Porco's faint burst of laughter through the door.

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

The hot sun was beginning to overwhelm your tanning session, so you decided to take a quick dip in the water. The lingering burn you felt as you jumped into the water, even through Jeans sunglasses, was intoxicating, The feeling of empowerment and lustful eyes on your body. As you swam up, you could see a ripple of a figure standing over you. Looking up to the figure, there stood Jean, his tall, strong presence staring down at you, almost belittling you in his shadow.

Jean motioned you to come towards him, and you did as he commanded. He watched your every move as you swam, grabbing unto the wall. You looked up at Jean through your eyelashes as you spoke, “You called for me?”

Jean swallowed, his adam’s apple bobbing in his throat. Agitation could easily be seen. Everything was falling into place.

“It isn't very appropriate to be wearing a bathing suit like that at a family pool,” he said lowly while motioning down towards you.

Acting oblivious, “I'm sorry? I couldn't hear you,” you said innocently. Jean huffed as he kneeled to your level, his crotch in your full view. He tried to repeat himself but was distracted by your tanned tits in front of him.

“As you were saying?” you whispered, noticing the slight bulge in his swim trunks.

Jean clenched his jaw, “Your bathing suit,” he paused before continuing, “It's inappropriate.”

Still maintaining eye contact with Jean, “Isn't that the whole point?” you taunted. His hazel eyes had lust behind them, you left his gaze to trail your eyes down his body, ending at the bulge in his trunks.

“It seems to me you enjoy it,” you seductively added as you lifted your hand to brush against his crotch lightly, “but will you do something about it?” you whispered. There was a tense silence as if the world froze around you. Bringing your hand back, you turned away from him, swimming away. In his entire life, he’d never felt desire like this. Or the desperation to touch, to hold, to own.

One down, one more to go.

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

Time passed from your interaction with Jean, the side looks he gave you assured the message you gave him; however, Porco saw the whole interaction from his post. You climbed out of the pool to dry off, grabbed your sunglasses, and sat on your pool seat. Knowing Porco's eyes were on you, you made eye contact with him through his shades. Giving a sweet smile his way only resulted in him quickly looking the other way.

If that couldn't reel him in, something else could. Porco’s rotation change was coming to an end as Jean came in replacement. You watched the two boys interact with each other, Porco leaned over to Jean’s ear, speaking something. Porco glanced at you, making Jean slap the back of Porco’s head as he walked away.

Porco began walking to the lounge area, but you stopped him in his tracks, “Excuse me!” you shouted. He turned to you and hummed in response.

“Would you mind putting this on my back for me?” you questioned as you motioned the tanning oil bottle in your hand. Porco was dumbfounded, but quickly gathered himself, “I suppose I can,” he replied dryly.

As Porco walked towards you, you gave him your back, passing the bottle overhead. The spray hitting your skin made you flinch in response, “Sorry,” you giggled.

You felt Porco’s hot palms against your skin, his large calloused hands spreading the oil. Soon after, Porco began to massage the knots in your shoulders and neck, and a sweet moan slipped; blood rushed to his cock immediately.

He leaned into your ear, “Move your straps for me, doll,” he whispered. You obeyed his words and gently lowered them.

Turning into your shoulder, Porco's lips almost touched your plumped ones. His hot breaths against yours were so invigorating that you wanted more. “At least I know you're obedient,” he breathed.

The urge for this man to fuck your brains out in front of everyone was intense, you never wanted something more. You got closer, licking his top lip before replying, “Yes, sir,” you panted.

Porco already had a painful hard-on in his trunks, but he lowly growled as he moved away and carried on spreading the oil. His wandering hands slid over your chest, lowering each time, leaving goosebumps on your skin. Your center throbbed for him, slick soaking your bottoms. He squeezed your shoulder as he replaced the straps on them, “There you go, doll,” he grinned, “all done.”

You turned your body towards him, dazed and drunk from his touch. His figure swallowing you whole. Light chocolate brown eyes met yours, “Don't cause too much trouble now,” he taunted. Looking at him, you nodded your head in response. A devious smile spread across his face, “Good girl.” he said.

He left thinking he’s won, but oh, was he so wrong.

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

People trickled out over time since the pool was near to closing, leaving you to be the only person left. Gathering your things to head out, a vibration rang through your bag, a phone call. A devious smile came across your face when you reached in and looked at the caller ID. Answering the call and selecting the speaker option for all to hear, Jean and Porco.

“Hey, you still up for tonight?” Reiner said in a flirtatious tone. “The real question is, are you?” you joked.

Reiner’s laugh blasted through the speakers, “Oh, I sure am,” he argued, “I’ve been thinking about your pussy all day.” Turning over your shoulder to see if Jean or Porco were listening in the conversion, they were already staring.

Replying to Reiner, you maintained eye contact with both men. “Have you now?” you teased softly, “I could say the same about you.”

“I'll pick you up in an hour,” he stated. Humming in agreement, you hung up the phone. Breaking away from their intense stare, it felt like glass was cutting through your skin. Standing from your seat with everything in hand, walking into the bathroom, you finally noticed you’ve been holding your breath. This adrenaline was going straight to your pussy, but you weren't thinking of your fuck link Reiner.

Trying to catch your breath while settling your things on the sink counter, a hot and flustered reflection stared back at you. The frustration of wanting to get pounded into was infuriating, the whole week had gone by without having a mindblowing orgasm; your fingers weren't doing the job. The trap you’ve set this whole week.

Nobody, empty was the restroom, and the smell of chlorine filled your nose, so rinsing off would be best, you thought. The sound of the door opening brought you back to reality, but you knew who would be there. As Jean’s reflection soon joined behind you, your eyes remained on yours.

Jean’s eyes leered into your reflection, no words were needed. His stature swallowed you whole, the sound of his breathing matched yours. The pressure was overwhelming as you slowly met his gaze.

“You're so desperate,” Jean voiced as he stepped closer, feeling his bulge against your ass “And it fucking shows.” His words went straight down to your center, soaking it even more, but you didn't wanna give in just yet. No reactions to his words, he continued, “I hate you,” he spat, “all I've been thinking is your lips wrap around my cock” Jean said while looking unto your pink, plump lips.

“It's disgusting, and I can't stop,” Jean grunted irritably. You turned while looking into his dark hazel ones and pressing your body more into his, “Then don’t,” you whispered. Before you could speak, Jean grabbed your neck and shoved you hard into the sink counter.

“Shut the fuck up,” he snapped. A smile crept onto your lips, feeling his large hands around your neck, your pussy twitched for him. “You like that, don't you?” Jean taunted. He brought his face closer to yours as he spoke, “You're a dirty slut, and I'm going to give it to you like one,” Jean growled.

Pushing you down to your knees harshly, his now huge bulge in his pants stared back at you. “Fix the problem you made,” he said with malice. Your mouth drooled for him while untying his swim trunks, and his hard cock slipped out, dripping with precum. He was huge, making you question if you could fit all of him in your mouth.

The look on your face amused Jean, “Open your fucking mouth.” he commanded. You compiled, you've been waiting for this moment for so long, He shoved his cock into your mouth with great force you choked on it. Your hands grabbed his hips for support as Jean violently used your mouth as a cocksleeve to abuse. You moaned against him, causing him to groan from the vibration against him, “F-fuck” he moaned.

The erotic sounds filled the room, it was euphoric. Without noticing, Porco was standing beside both you and Jean, staring at the scene before. “What a filthy whore” he chuckled, “She fucking loves it.” Before Jean could come, he pushed you off, leaving you gasping for air.

“God, I didn't know you were so worked up.” Porco teased, “Shut the fuck up,” Jean roughly replied. You sat on the wet floor, catching your breath, and interrupted them, “That's it?’ you croaked, throat still raw from Jean.

Porco smugly looked down at you, “Oh baby, we're just getting started,” he said. He grabbed a fist full of your hair and made you look at him, “You don’t get to say a word,” He spat, “Unless I tell you.” The rough handling made you moan and nod in agreement, “No, use your words whore” he demanded.

“Yes, sir” you moaned. A devilish smile laid on Porco’s lips, “Good girl.” Porco leaned down causing you to yelp from his rough hands ripping your top off, exposing your tits and nipples to get perky from the cold air. “You don't need that anymore.” he teased.

Jean watched as Porco grabbed your mouth and squeezed your cheeks together, “Open that pretty mouth of yours.” he praised, opening your mouth, Porco spit. “Now swallow it.” he asked sternly. You swallowed and stuck your tongue out to show proof of it, causing both men to smile at how filthy you are.

Porco grabbed you, leaning you over the sink counter and moving your legs to the sides. He spanked you, a moan slipped your lips. Porco grunted, “Filthy attention whore,” he continued, “This is what you wanted.”

A giggle escaped your lips, “It worked.” You said dazely looking into his eyes' reflections. Porco's actions spoke louder, he spanked you harder, before ripping your bathing suit bottoms off. Your exposed cunt was soaked and dripping aching for them.

“God, you're a bitch in heat, y/n” he said with a smirk on his lips

Porco didn’t want to give you what you wanted. He grabbed your hair, turning you around towards him and pushing you to your knees. Still holding your hair, he commanded you, “Undo it.” Doing as he commanded, his cock tip was pink and dripped with precum for you. Porco looked down to his cock and spat on it before gripping your hair hard, shoving himself into your mouth. His cock hit the back of throat with each thrust. You slide your fingers down to your cunt, touching your clit to stimulate yourself even more.

Jean was stroking himself watching you gag on Porco’s cock and touching yourself, but he wanted more. Jean walked over you, both men towering over you. “You're our cumslut from now on.” Porco grunted as he thrusted. Jean grabbed your hand that was on your cunt, bringing your fingers into his mouth. Jean moaned against your fingers, the sweet taste of you on his tongue.

“Mhm, Poc, you were fucking right,” Jean slurred, “She’s a sweet one.” Porco didn't reply back but rather held in his final thrust, causing you to gag and roll your eyes back from the overwhelming pleasure.

“Shit.” Porco growled as he took himself out of your warm mouth, you sat there dazed by the lack of air. Wasting no time, Porco lifted you and shoved you into Jean causing you to grab unto him for balance.

Porco leaned you over, your cunt towards him, he slipped his long, large fingers into your aching pussy causing you to orgasm against him. “Wow, that was easy.” Porco panted, “Fucking slut.” He pumped his fingers in and out of you, the sounds your pussy was making sucking him in was straight out of a porn scene. Jean felt your hot pants against him made his cock throb. He grabbed your neck, squeezing it, cutting of your air. You looked at Jean through your lashes, eyes rolling back. Porco picked up the pace of his fingers and Jean chocking you, overwhelmed you; all your focus went to Porco’s fingers, the lack of oxygen made you cream on them.

Jean lossen his grip on your neck leaving you to gasp and cry from the orgasm, spasming against both the men like a pathetic whore. Porco brought his fingers to your mouth, “Taste yourself baby.” he cooed, “Such a sweet girl.” Sucking on his fingers, Porco felt your warm tongue swirl around them making him moan.

“You’ve been such a good sweet girl for us both, so we’ll give you what you want.” Porco taunted, you stared into Jean blankly still coming off your orgasm. “Tell us what you want pretty girl” Jean added.

“F-fuck me” you drawled. No hesitiation, Porco gripped your hips guiding you towards to sink. “Jean boy, give a go before I fuck her brains out” he said darkly. Jean pounced on you, his cock gilding into your cunt with ease. Jean was so big he stretched your pussy with each thrust; it hurt but you didnt care. His hips slapped against your ass with every thrust he made, the sound filled the room. Jean picked up the pace, and grabbed your throat while he pulled your body against his. He squeezed your neck, no air, just Jean’s cock hitting the right spot each time.

“Fucking s-shit.” Jean groaned, “You like that? I just felt you squeeze my cock.” Jean’s thurst got harder, your eyes rolling back and drool dripping from your lips. Thrusting into the final time, Jean held it inside you as he came all inside you, groaning and moaning into your ear. As he came, so did you, gasping for literal air and legs shaking violently.

Jean didnt give you time to recover and slipped out of you, passing you to Porco like a ragdoll. Porco slid into you and pounded into you like a menace, his cock hitting the fucking spot. “O-oh m-my FUCK!” You screamed. Porco was letting out all of his frustration from this week on you, he didnt care, he just wanted to fuck your brains out until it was all mush.

Porco pulls you against him, making you look at yourself through the mirror as you get fucked. He grabs your cheeks and slaps you, the sting made your pussy twitch around him. “Y-yes r-RIGHT THERE!” You yelled.

“Filthy cunt.” he growled, “I'm gonna come in you.” Your screams and Porcos thrusts filled the room, you wanted everyone to know you were getting fucked good. Porco slapped you even harder and bit unto your ear, his cock twitched inside you hearing your screams. He came and held you tight, both coming together. “Oh my fuck-” Porco moaned as he unloaded into you. Your legs finally gave out, collapsing to the floor. He wasnt done unloading his seed into you, he picked you again, his cook pumping into your overstimulating pussy.

You were blabbing and drooling like a bitch. Porco finally let you go, causing you to collapse to the floor. You quivered and spasmed, drunk off their cock. He leaned down, sticking his three fingers into you, “I don't want our loads to go to waste.” Porco said lowly. Causing you to yelp from the overstimulation.

Porco looked over at Jean, “I think she still has a couple more rounds in her, right?” Porco questioned.

Jean smiled, “Yeah,” he paused, “I still have more to unload in her.”

Both men brought you up on your wobbly legs, Porco smashed his lips onto yours, his tongue exploring yours. Jean pulled you away, a silver of drool followed your mouth to his. The kiss was the exact same way as Porcos. They wanted to fuck you. Hard, insistent, determined. Branding their taste on your lips, marking you as their own.

“What a pretty girl,” Jean stated. Porco chuckled in agreement and added, “and obedient.”

You were there for their disposal to use and abuse, as many times they wanted to unload their seed into you. Lets just say, you were hooked on their cocks for the rest of the summer, or perhaps even forever.

tag-list: @kentosovertime @sugarmapoops @sugarbooger513 @severelytalentless @bebechinas99 @jeankirsteinsgirl @katgalle

#jems writing #jean kirstein #jean kirstein smut #jean kirstein x reader #jean kirstein x you #jean kirstein x y/n #aot jean #jean snk #attack on titan jean #porco galliard #porco galliard smut #porco galliard x reader #porco galliard x you #porco galliard x y/n #porco x you #porco snk #aot porco #attack on titan porco #aot #aot smut #aot x reader #aot x y/n #snk x y/n

[sooepz]

favorite kpop group(s) tag game!

tagged by : @writingmochi thank you for the tag lissie!! (and ofc for always having me included in these!)

sorry i cuss a lot

who is your favourite kpop group?

oh boy.. i hope i’m able to answer this without having to list down more than 10+ groups all at once (i’m being serious) but if having favs that you’re constantly updated to then : bts, txt, le sserafim, enhypen, nct dream, riize & aespa!

which member sparked your interest first?

i’m having the toughest time now but here we go

bts : JUNGKOOK! who else other than our used one of the main rappers (WE LOST TO RAPPER JUNGKOOK BEFORE 2015 AND IM STILL BITTER but out of honesty that sadnesses washed away the moment when he decided to birth outro : love is not over and let’s just say i’ve never been fine since then) bro has been an all-rounder since day one and to that he was the one that made me to discover bts (touché)

txt : yeonjun (duh) i was once a bts popper so the moment we were getting a new boy group under bh i just knew i had to check them out. i mean yeonjun is literally every moa’s first love so it’s almost understandable for him to be the first member for you to be interested to LOL

le sserafim : huh to the yunjin (are we serious? that woman slayed on her first day job) it’s mesmerising to see that source music *blood coughing* decided to give us a closure…………… but miss it girl yunjin, duh she’s a starstruck i know it’s getting out of the phrase but i’ll always be grateful that she becomes an idol. the world (read kpop) wouldn’t be the same without her existence. 

enhypen : SUNGHOON!!!!! ON AN ICE RINK!!!! SKATING!!!!! LIKE ???? IVE NEVER SEEN AN IDOL WHO WERE AN ICE SKATER BEFORE LIKE ??? THATS THE MOST PUREST BEAUTIFUL FORM SOMEONE COULDVE BE???

nct dream : mark! bc he was one of the members that were introduced first as part of the nct u sub-unit. i first watched him performing the 7th sense debut performance on music bank and was surprised to see him in the other remaining sub-unit under sm (but then i figured it out that nct IS a group that consists few sub-unit) (i was confused, still am)

riize : wonbin. any attractive man with long hair never not makes me HOOKED on a first sight. he’s majestic. AS HELL. he plays the guitar very well too?? 

aespa : karina!! also i think this was everyone’s normal occurrences of having karina as the first member that sparked your interest in aespa bc same. i only know her first in aespa like she’s mentioned in every fic or edit or on stan twt like… she’s everywhere it’s crazy. (the power she holds)

who was your first bias?

INTERESTING

bts : hoseok. man do we need to replay my first love? HE WAS THE MAN OF MY LIFE.

txt : soobin,, ARE WE SURPRISE AGAIN 

le sserafim : chaewon! i think the answer is there.

enhypen : sunghoon (forever will) 

nct dream : jisung. bro when i say that i used to have a serious crush on him? 2018 zu was a jisung’s whipped era.

riize : sungchan! 90s love was a life experience. (man decided to just make a cameo and slay as fuck) i know we are suppose to talk about sungchan in riize but he’s my first bias in riize ONLY because i knew him first alongside with shotaro (sungtaro slay) 

aespa : KIM MINJEONG. YOU CANNOT TALK TO ME ON HER. SHE WAS MY FIRST LOVE??? 

who is your current bias?

basically just the same except for bts & nct dream :D

bts : yoongi (i am a joke)

txt : soobin (salute for being this loyal)

le sserafim : chaewon

enhypen : sunghoon

nct dream : renjun (....... surprise surprise)

riize : sungchan (eventho i highly think this won’t last long….fuck)

aespa : ningning

what makes them your current bias?

bts : I KNOW CRAZY. i’ve been there for hobi since 2014 esp around those times when no one was there to appreciate him truly as one of the members (DARK TIMES FOR ME, we do not talk about that) but then 2017 yoongi came in. it’s just something about yoongi himself that soothes my soul in peace. the way he thought of things in his own perspective without disrespecting anybody and the way he’s just a full walking comfort a person could be for anyone, for me particularly. his godly, incredible amount of times he’d shown off his talent in rap, producing and things he’d done. i can talk about yoongi that people wouldn't be able to understand bc he’s so ?? what a person is supposed to be. is there anything to prove why i decided to change a bias? 

txt : when soobin was introduced as the second member of txt (gurl) when i told you that soobin introduction film was… a first love at sight moment, it was true. soobin has been the love of my fucking life since then. actually no there’s so many things that i love about soobin. so many things, it’s unexplainable. i can confidently say that his voice caught me off-guard on a first listen. i know it’s dramatic as hell (ANYTHING I SAY ABOUT MY BIASES ARE SO QUESTIONABLE BUT I AM BEING SERIOUS) he has the rarest vocal on his falsetto? he’s doing it effortlessly too? if that’s not enough to actually prove my point of him being my bias then idk what is. man is majestic as hell too. (BONUS POINT!)

le sserafim : AAAAHHHHHHHHHHH god chaewon… honestly, i wasn’t a wiz*one bc produce 48 was shitty as hell. (I WATCHED EVERY MNET SURVIVAL SHOW EXCEPT FOR THIS) neither do i like the final debut lineup for iz*one. i just couldn’t pinpoint what was missing but that’s not the point of that rn. well. for me, i think the majority of people would have agreed with me about this but chaewon is better off with le sserafim. (AUDIENCE GASP) i COULD NEVER say that she caught my attention even the tiniest bit when she was in iz*one, but she did ON A FIRST SIGHT OF HER DEBUT IN LE SSERAFIM. the way that she kept on improving and i didn’t even know that she can dance so well???? (this woman is literally everyone’s type and it’s FUCKING understandable) i watched their documentary too and i love her even much more than i should’ve? i think having chaewon as my bias, it’s emotional. i am emotionally attached to her and i don’t want to seek therapy. 

enhypen : *internally crying, hysterically screaming* are we ready to hear the part of me losing almost entirely of my sanity? i was away from home for the first time for my college, and never really bothered to get updated with my kpop life. those days were.. hectic (as everyone did) but long short story i was on tiktok, at my room, at home since for so long, AFTER my hectic first sem and i just so happened to stumble upon a sunghoon edit on an ice rink, skating WITH THE TIMOTHEE TREND SONG (2020 WAS 4 YEARS AGO TOO?? GOD) AND IM LIKE ??? WHO IS THIS? I NEED TO KNOW WHO IS HE. yk i haven’t watched iland yet at that time (and probably shouldn’t so that i wouldn’t have to endure the trauma that show gave me), and only decided to watch it bc of him. I JUST LOVE LOVE skater park sunghoon a lot more than myself (that should be considered as normal btw) and i never regretted checking out on iland bc if i don’t i wouldn’t have known just how unique his talent is? you can ACTUALLY tell he has the most unique way of dancing, as if he’s dancing with every bit of his skating method and combining it to his dancing style and it’s just ?? beautiful… god park sunghoon i love him a lot.

nct dream : crying as i type this, i love renjun a lot. man is so demonically pure. i haven’t been on nct shit for SO LONG until last year (only applicable for nct dream) and i am attached as shit as they wanted me to be. i think re-stanning nct dream (i will say this forever if i’ve to prove how much they mean to me) was the peak of the third quarter of my life last year. but as for renjun, he’s just so easy to love? for me, his own persona to things as a person always never makes me so deeply attached. (like the fucking loser i am) renjun have a lot of things you can say a lot of things to, like his vocals? (ik you can confidently say that sm has the most vocals out of that shitty company) but i LOVE to listen to his voice. he’s singing with his emotions and my soul thaws in silence every time. HES ALSO SO ROMANTIC LIKE??? MAN CASUALLY JUST ASKED HIS TEAMMATES TO HAVE A MATCHING FRIENDSHIP RINGS LIKE? 

riize : as for sungchan, i think i'm still learning about him. I know i’ve seen him a few times (more than 10 times on screen as for the appearance of the inkigayo and being part of nct) but i still have a lot of things to learn before i can list things down. (gurl you’re in love with another member)

aespa : i love everything about ning yizhuo. i honestly have no idea how i changed my bias but i could never say no to people who can sing well. her vocals?? i can listen to her singing on a daily basis. shes a stunner, a mother=my type. well, her whole existence stands out the most when i first discovered aespa. i just love ningning, she’s so loveable, i love her except for she idolized that one problematic rat. 

who is your bias wrecker

bts : i love them all equally. (jungkook)

txt : taehyun. stfu 

le sserafim : kazuha!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i love my woman a ballerina 

enhypen : jungwon. 

nct dream : zhong chenle (hes so attractive???????????)

riize : eunseok 

aespa : minjeong……………………

which member are you currently obsessing that aren’t your bias/bias wrecker

bts : i’ll skip them (they be on military, i’ve no one to be obsessed to recently)

txt : beomgyu. (DAEGU MEN STAY AWAY FROM ME)

le sserafim : YUNJIN. she needs to stop 

enhypen : heeseung. i think i’ve problems with the 01 liner. 

nct dream : none i guess. (i'm still obsess with renjun)

riize : ….. sohee. i think out of the groups, sohee has the most valid reasons and i'm fully to blame for this. i watched the lee hyori’s red carpet to their sampled track of love 119 (THEIR BEST SONG YET WHAT THE FUCK) which is none other than the infamous emergency room ost AND WHEN I TELL YOU IVE BEEN OBSESSED SINCE. and that obsession didn’t stop there, i decided to check more to his vocals compilation and i stumbled upon his predebut covers… WORSE: his sofa cover has been playing on my mind all day since i first heard of it, it’s unhealthy. i’m gonna k word myself 

aespa : none too. 

when did you first discover the group?

bts : 2014. boy in luv was a superior era. 

txt : 2019…. that guessing the morse code at the end of introduction films of every member's era? good old days

le sserafim : on their debut

enhypen : end month of september 2020! (funfact : enhypen was formed on my birthday) 

nct dream : on their debut (them hoverboard era)

riize : on their debut days

aespa : early year 2022 (embarassing as fuck)

have you ever been to one of their concerts?

bts : gurl, no. they did a tour for the red bullet on june 2015? THAT ONE TIME ONLY. what did you expect from me? to go? i was 13. 

txt : they don’t even know my country exists? so no. 

le sserafim : no. (hybe better put malaysia when they do tour one day or else im burning down the whole building as it should’ve)

enhypen : no. (they skipped us.) 

nct dream : they did a tour last year in may…… but miss girl decided to only stan them back in june and was obsessed and mentally ill for not attending. (ONLY BC I AM NOT A FAN) i was late to the party, im sorry and now they be skipping us. 

riize : no. 

aespa : ???????? NO

what are some of your favourite songs by this group? 

i’ll list 10 songs!

bts : butterfly / dimple / coffee / love is not over (full length version) / epilogue : young forever / pied piper / outro : do you think it makes sense? / the truth untold ft steve aoki / spring day / hold me tight 

txt : 20cm / dear sputnik / 0X1=lovesong (i know i love you) ft seori / maze in the mirror / ghosting / skipping stones / fairy of shampoo / blue orangeade / farewell, neverland / eternally 

le sserafim : impurities / easy / perfect night / no celestial / antifragile / smart / blue flame / swan song / good parts (when the quality is bad but i am) / sour grapes

enhypen : just a little bit / criminal love / mixed up / chaconne / not for sale / blockbuster ft yeonjun of tomorrow x together / shout out / blind / given-taken / bills

nct dream : dive into you / teddy bear / 7 days / boom / my youth / better than gold / dunk shot / arcade / poison / love again

riize : …. i’ll list from most to least fav (I LOVE ALL OF THEIR SONGS) love 119 / talk saxy / get a guitar / memories  

aespa : lucid dream / dreams come true / drama / thirsty / next level / life’s too short / don’t blink / i’m unhappy / illusion / better things 

tagging : @my313 (no pressure bestie!) / anyone who want

#sooepz.x #tag games! #nobody is gonna read alllat #but little bit of me #kpop

[nikomedes]

it is 4am so whatever but. that poll about game PCs becoming OCs ur rly into blew up my whole spot. i was SUCH an OC hater from ages 13-19 for no reason, i just had this superiority complex like “why would u make a character without it being for a story (or ttrpg). just to have a doll to play with? i, a Storyteller, know the only worthy context in which to Make a Guy is in an original story that shapes them and is shaped by them in turn. STOP having fun.” i made OCs but i was SO scrupulous and bothered about having them be attached to original short stories i wrote

and then around 19 i started writing mass effect fic with shep/liara in a no reapers AU, in my spiral notebooks for class. i still have this somewhere, just a sheaf of paper i hand-numbered so i know there was a good 30-some pages of this fic, and mentally i was still going “my shep is a character in the context of a story still. im not weird. this isn’t weird.” and having OCs period isn’t weird but i was so worried

and then like… it must have been 2014. that was dragon age: inquisition and fallout 4 the same year. blew the damn doors off my joint. i only wrote one thing for da:i but i wrote ASSLOADS for f4. (my pet theory there being that da:i had enough compelling story content that i just wanted to fill in the edges, whereas f4’s story sucked so bad i couldnt help but try rehabilitating it with three different OCs and, i just counted, 45 pages of fic.)

in the years since as ive replayed things and let go of that weird teenage hangup, ive written so much. and its i would say 80% unposted. its just been for me. but i can say 100% that it made me enjoy the games more to bring that much story into it. i just checked my folders and ive written something about an OC for almost everything in that poll, with my lone wanderer of fallout ruling the roost at 20k words for his detailed outline and written story. add also pokemon to that list, for whatever reason. (the big pieces are for swsh and im putting that down to the f4 phenomenon again bc boy even for a pokemon game, those games are story light.) and im not fucked up about any of it. EXCEPT

EXCEPT

todd’s terrible trick. where he made a game so bad, but i was able to make such a huge, thick woman with the CHEF origin, that i put 20 hrs and this many words into the utter lack of game that is starfield

im so glad i 1) did not pay for it and 2) stopped playing, bc that game turned into such a nothing burger that if my usual decent base game story to fanfic ratio held, i would even now be 200 pages deep in a doorstopper novel about this space chef’s rich internal life

#i would be dead in the ground and it would be todds fault #THANK YOU LARIAN FOR MY LIFE #the stark difference between writing quality as i tried to play bg3 and starfield at the same time saved my life #i may be in astarion hell rn but as u can see there are worse hells to call home #dot txt #long post

[midnightmisadventures]

“No yea we’re batshit insane” - Dream Boy

Alternate title: Guys GUYS so much

Alternate title: The perma stoned semester 

Alterternate title: Trials and tribulations of separation. 

Alternate title: “Look, I didn’t want to be a Twin Flame”

------------------------------------------------------------------

I’m so fucking high rn on some delta 8 mothers day edibles and holy shit

highest ive been in so long lkike im in car 4 my heart is palpitating. 

Honestly kinda hope i dont die 

But.....

I was thinking about how high i am and how this used to be a typical 5pm on a tuesday high last year. Like holy shit i was just like this.......all the time. “The perma stoned semester” season rheme :)

But yea i was like this all the time, he was like this all the time, we got to know eachother like this

uncrontrollable smiling and laughter. While the sun rises, during sunsets, when its raining, when its thunder & lightening, when its snowing and theres soft christmas music playing. 

When my favorite music in the world played, when we all sang the words, when i saw his goofy smile every day during golden hour, 

Constant euphoria, constant giggly nonsense, always this high, the strongest strains, the rosiest glasses the dispensary sells. The vulnerability was unmatched. The connection to 5D was like no other time. 

This high: Making dinner together, watching our favorite movies, playing UNO, making pancakes, training a kitten, talking about our traumas, questioning life, creating our bucket lists, sharing stories for hours, 

No wonder it felt like a goddamn movie and NO WONDER we only saw the best in eachother. We fell in love headfirst all while being our funniest, most authentic, vulnerable, happy, stoner selves. We were never the sober versions with eachother so of course we both came out of that era SO confused how the other couldnt see how great and beautiful they are. 

Like i was likke Liam is so magnetic and hilarious, he’s so supportive and understands me so well, he’s so creative and vibrant and sexy. How can he not know how amazing and wonderful he is. He’s such a catch? 

But i was ONLY seeing the high version of him. His most inner childish self shinign throigh withoujt him even realizing. His most comfortable self, his most ambitious self! Like he had a milltion ideas a minute, he was incredibly confident, and charming. When he was sober a few hours later..... He no longer thought any of those ideas were remotely possible. Or that any of the stuff we unpacked, the trauma we analyzed, Was actually real or had any real value outside of those conversations or any other hour we were stoned. 

It was no wonder things always felt their worst when we were sober. Or when he went sober for those couple months in spring semester . Or when I was on tour. Or in november.....

He was going home every semester. And was immediately transported out of it. Our dream world we created, our dream selves we acted like. The shocking sobriety of it all. He’s said when he was home “this didnt exist, this didnt feel real. THIS is a fantasy land” 

He was going home and getting high, but it wasnt the same, it was like trying to grasp onto that euphoria. But we werent there. Dunham wasnt there. SO it didnt work, weed didnt transport him, and his demons were still able to convince him that he was worthless.  So he didnt want to bank on  promises made in the fantasy land andthe fantasy girl was leaving....

So he had to cut off transportation. Take out the drugs. Leave the euphoria behind, focus on the real world, cause god thats gotta hurt less than having my dream world promises shatter in front of me. And everyone in the real world making es fun of me cause i believed in “dream world promises?” NO, I’m not spiritual wizard, I’m a 24 year old who needs to get his shit together. 

We were true drug addicts. Addicted to weed and how 11:11 much it made us love eachother. How invincible it made us feel. How real it made the promises sound. Every day stoned as hell. Smoking As much as we could, as much as we could push out the real world and try to convince eachother that we should both screw it all and live together in dream world. 

Sober: Different people. 

But when he went sober I still smoked, almost as much. I stayed in dream world i learned every crack and crevis on my own. Found my own tricks, got in touch with some people made some connections. I kept it up. 

I missed him, and I ached for him. I wanted to remind him of his value, and all the things we talked about in dream world. And real world him was so cold. And so uninterested. And kept pushing mer away. But I knew he was in there :( 

So i stayed close by and i moaned and i ached and i gave blessings from far away. And I wished for him to come back.

If she could just reach the dreamworld version of him push through. Try harder to come out, and teach real world version of him about BALANCE. 

Well...yea. Idk I guess I’m just fucking high and missing him and for the first time realizing how easy it is to think of the most amazing moments of him when I;m this high. And it made me realize damn. This was my state of mind that WHOLE time. It is such a warped, and dreamlike, movie like state. 

And thats just crazy because thats the reason we saw the best in eachother and all of our potential all the time. It was our happiest headspaces. And thats how we got to know eachother, thats whyh it was so easy to fall in love, and think of him so highly. 

Whenever I need to fall in love with him, i let dream girl run the ship for a few hours. If dream girl is struggling to reach me, they’ll send me a dream like last night. When he was finally balanced and asked me to be his. 

Like right now i’m seeing hallucinations, and jamming to music, and laughing so hard i cant breathe by myself and then i was like............”OHHHHH, this is the version i remember, oh yea.....duh you could fall in love with anyone like this” 

“This is why it was so easy to know he was the love of my life. Cause i used cheat codes. I skipped past all the armour, i went under all the layers and got to know the truest him. All his doubts, fears, dreams, and insecurities. Everything you shield away from strangers. And pretty girls who intimidate you

And u have to be this high to understand the feeling. To really remember the romance of it all. To realize how magical and toxic it all really was. 

.....I’m dream girl right now, And I remember EVERYTHING

(lol like see how instantly such a movie) Like “Be fucking forreal” - Real world girl

Record time and im still pretty high btw

#i have an alibi

[beatlynxx]

For the scrimblo bingo,,,, I mean I gotta ask about my man Tsubasa

And uhhh *googles list of bakuten shoot characters* Kai, maybe?

Actually I think the two of them have the same English va! Interesting...

tsubasa (mfb) — one of my brother's favourites again as u see he has rlly good taste

HES GOOD he's just iconic!!!! everything i want to say abt him wasn't in the bingo 😭😭

first of all. i have sooooo much respect for him srsly. he's one of those characters where u just go oh that one's good. wait no they're evil ??? wait no they're good ??? just characters that make you think abt their position and role in the series. i <3 when characters spy somewhere

also his arc was 1) one of the things i rlly liked in masters 2) one of my favourite arcs in general we all know how good all that was

just sad that he didn't know abt reiji's existence in the anime but that doesn't have anything to do him anyway, otherwise he's a peak character

------

kai (bsb) — bba revolution free pass. neoborg free pass as well. but i also love him on his own

ALSO WAIT RLLY THEY SHARE VAS ???? i watched only like the first three episodes of the bsb dub so i wouldn't know but that's sick what. grey haired bird boys yeah makes sense

okay so (wanted to put this under a cut but it fucks up the key points. hate it here)

at first he was too emo for me /lh

it was kind of funny how he kept running off on his own too like where u goin bud

but when i realized that i could watch bsb in japanese he quickly became one of my favs because his voice there is so gender lol

gooood when borg and everything got revealed it all made sense the boy has repressed trauma and the boy has lots of it. man

also ive been thinking. boyuri joined borg like . a year before the bsb plot started iirc and kai was there since he was a child like that's a lot

also his character development was so good. fighting on his own without his grandfather's influence all that yknow

one of the only bad things abt him is that i really don't like what they did to him in v force like who the hell is that 💀 hashtag not my kai but again, not his fault

i am also pointing my transgender beam towards him

#cubic.doc #tsubasa otori #beyblade tsubasa #kai hiwatari

[ezradogteeth]

do u have any advice or reassurance for someone who identified as a binary trans man for a long time and then realized he’s genderfluid and is kind of panicking about whether to come out again about it or just privately be genderweird and is questioning whether to continue hormonal transition? :)

i think its super normal and even cool to have transitioned as a binary trans person and later realized you're more genderqueer/genderfluid/nonbinary/androgynous etc. i know other people who have done the same thing, and i relate as well, more with my physical transition than my identity but yeah :)

i'd say for both hrt and coming out, it depends on what would make you happiest of course! if you aren't uncomfortable with people seeing you as male and think it wouldnt be worth it to come out again bc you're already fine with your social/external gender, its totally chill to just know you're genderfluid and be genderfluid on your own, no pressure to come out. but if you think youd feel more comfortable and understood if people knew you're genderfluid and maybe changed what pronouns they use for you (obvs u dont have to change ur pronouns if u come out either) etc, coming out again could be a good option! the people who love u will be excited for you figuring out yourself more and be happy to support you, i know it can be weird to come out again, but theres absolutely nothing wrong with changing how you identify. and remember u dont have to Formally Come Out all at once, u can also just tell your close friends one at a time when u feel comfortable with it, take it slow and casual, thats how ive been approaching changing my pronouns and some complicated stuff w my name.

as for HRT, i struggled a Lot to decide if i wanted to keep taking it, for months i was unsure. firstly i made a list of all the effects T had on me, positive and negative, and wrote each thing i thought about into two columns on a piece of paper (staying on T vs going off T) which helped me sort out on a practical level what going off it would mean. but its really all about the vibes lol like its completely cool for u to continue T and still be genderfluid, you don't have to meet any standard for androgyny, if you like being on T thats sweet. if you want to be read as more androgynous or feel like going off T would be more congruent with your identity, thats also great. and remember you can always go back on it in the future if you want!

everything i said was really obvious but yeah. its awesome that u have learned more about yourself and accepted it as part of you. whatever you do from here is up to you, and any path you take is great. personally, i find it worth it to re-come our to my closest friends and be open about changes in my gender identity and presentation, it helps me a lot even tho its a hassle to deal with. but as for acquaintances and strangers idc about coming out since any way they read me is whatever

it has been strange for me going very far with my physical transition (3years on T and had top surgery), and then deciding to go off T and present more purposefully feminine/androgynously. i love it tho its fun to explore now that i can choose with ease to be a boy or a girl or neitherboth etc since my body is v androgynous/masculine. love to be a girl with masculine features and love to be a boy with feminine features too. teehee

good luck i hope whatever you do makes u happy!!!

#transition #gender

[voicefromthecorner]

one thing i noticed is that the swallow reveal is easier to see coming if you haven't played the first game. you aren't the only person ive seen to theorize that swallow is joshua, but of course only ppl who've played the first game would think that to begin with. they approach it thinking "who would be the most unexpected and mind blowing reveal?" and assume it must be someone from the first game while NEO only fans focus strictly on the clues they've been given in the game they're playing.

I was just thinking this myself, yesterday! I'd be curious to know what the experience of non-OG TWEWY players was with, well, this game in general, but especially this twist. As well as others who were returning TWEWY fans like me.

To give myself some credit here, I mentioned earlier that my theories on Swallow's identity are well documented and my very first suspect was (total shot in the dark, albeit) Nagi. And one of my top suspects of Swallow's identity for much of the game was Tsugumi. Joshua was one of many suspects and I'm sure Shoka crossed that list at some point but due to some assumptions about what she would do with that information, I crossed her off it pretty rashly. Thinking back, I'm honestly not sure why I did. Mostly I just thought she'd say something to Rindo if it was her, but now I can't fathom why I assumed that.

On Joshua, I didn't suspect him without reason, as though I was expecting Joshua to jump out from behind every corner. Had I not had Swallow's gender spoiled for me, I likely still wouldn't have expected that reveal at that time since Joshua himself hasn't been set up in any way. Even now, nobody from the old game has made an appearence without precedence:

Beat was set up a couple of days in advance and for a while he was thought to be Neku, who was talked about both before and after Beat joined the team. Neku himself, of course, was built up a lot by those very talks. Rhyme hasn't made a formal appearence yet, but her presence has been teased throughout the game and she's recently been name-dropped, so she could appear at any time. The same goes for Shiki, who was discussed and name-dropped immediately prior to the hint of someone who I'm, like, 99% sure is her appearing. Coco sprinkled herself throughout the game before she appeared. Kariya and Uzuki are exceptions, but they're not too major characters and as Reapers, the mere existence of Reapers kind of sets them up enough.

My point is, unless he had something to do with that recent light show, Joshua hasn't been given a reason to show up and start interfering with a story that's had nothing to do with him so far. Narratively, it might have been a little cheap. But if he was Swallow, well, there's a link!

However, as you say, that link only exists for a returning TWEWY fan who knows about Joshua in the first place. No other part of NEO has indicated his existence yet beyond very occasionally mentioning the Composer. A lot of my reasons for suspecting him ended up being misplaced and hindsight makes it easier to see the twist as it exists only within the context of NEO, which is why it works so well.

Basically, I wasn't assuming it was Joshua simply because it would be mind-blowing, but I was expecting Joshua to blow my mind at some point.

Fortunately, the twist wasn't about the Composer of Shibuya making another lonely teenager do his bidding, as an OG TWEWY fan would be familiar with in the previous game. Instead it was about a boy getting to meet his online best friend in the most dramatic way possible.

At the end of the day, the real Swallow was the friend we made along the way!

#neo the world ends with you #twewy #neo twewy spoilers #swallow #shoka sakurane #ask #me #anonymous #joshua kiryu

[snowflakebyyou]

Is it love, obsession, limerence, infatuation, fun, validation?

I always found myself obsessing over men. No lie in that. I love men, I dislike the behaviours that many, if not all men I’ve met possesses. But I can’t help but love them. When I find myself in a position of having a crush, its all-encompassing. I want to know everything about their day, and how they felt when they woke up, are they horny today? What do you see your life looking like in an ideal world? What about the world would you change? Any fantasies you’ve never played out? I go from 0-100 , but ALL in my own head. And, usually for people who merely saw our interaction as short, temporary and minimal.

I don’t communicate this well and then tend to self-destruct as I go around in circles in my head. My friends usually witness a slice of this. but I cop the rest, quietly. I worked in therapy about how this linked to my needing an emotionally available male figure, and that I seek this through physical validation from men. I also learnt that I can get this from myself, and healing this wound is not overnight and it takes work.

I find a lot of my validation from myself now, people have said I’m too much, and it may be a lot for them to follow me on social media ; that’s ok. I much rather a self-obsessed me, compared to a self-loathing me, and I know those in my life that matter to me, would agree as well. But then there’s those moments where I become intrigued by a boy. I find myself wondering, and maybe even involved. Then I started to obsess over whether he likes me or not. Instead, of worrying If I even like him at all, or do I just need him to like me.

90% of the time, its wanting him to be into me. My ego loves to be fed by men. I stopped caring about hat women think of me when I starting to like myself. But im still working on the men part. I go between caring too much to not caring at all and both of these levels aren’t healthy for me to sit in. I constantly wondered why people could just date someone and know they want to be with them straight away, like do you actually like someone enough to want to spend that much time with them?, or why my close friends that are in relationships constantly make jokes about me being crazy when it came to men. I’m definitely on the scale , but isn’t every woman? As told by history, any woman with a voice is borderline insane? Yeah.

I mean what’s wild is, I have really high standards written out for myself, a list of my ideal partner. A list that I try to embody myself. I still go for the same kind of men, because, as ive said before, I’m emotionally unavailable. So men that are on the same level as me, work for me for right now. I’m comfortable and I feel more in control dating or seeing men that I know wouldn’t work long term – and they know it too. We basically keep each other occupied. The one before the one.

Fast forward to when I heard of a term called ‘Limerence’. Limerence can be described as an experience of insanely strong desire for a person. But obsessive. Like being stuck in a limbo of being uncertain and hopeful, never really knowing which one.

Although I don’t completely relate to it, there is aspects of limerence that have made sense to me when I have thought I’ve liked someone. Almost as if, when the chase started to diminish, or it started to be mutual - I lost interest- I know it links to that idea of physical validation but this I believe goes deeper. 

It’s a hectic thing to be aware of, but I simply feel like a child in a play centre, where everything is so exciting, there’s so much fun to choose from and you want to have a turn of it all! then when another child has a turn, you immediately HAVE to have what they have. Or that toy is so high up you need someone else’s help to get it down! But when you get it , you realise its just like the other toy you had just been enjoying. It’s  that exciting sensation of the unknown per se. its intense, and uncontrollable. Its overwhelming, consuming and keeps you distracted. But it isn’t healthy. 

This isn’t to say men are toys. Or people for that matter. They are not. Peoples feelings are real and vulnerable. And to have someone show you who they are and feel completely comfortable in your energy, is really special and rare. Real connection is not a game and a person who is meant for you, will never feel like they’re toying with you or make you feel like you’re on a shelf waiting to be picked. But if im being completely real, this is how I have felt in the past.

Its hard to be apart of a world where everyone compares every situation, when they are all so different. We all have different life experiences that bring us here. We’ve had partners that have destroyed our confidence and trust in other people and relationships that have been results of unhealthy addiction or obsession that just proves to be nothing positive. The way we each view the world will always be inherently different because WE are. My understanding of me is going to be different to the next persons, ill never see what you do about me, and you’ll never know all of me. Its funny how that works?

L, xox.

[haikyustanaccount]

2017: The Year Pop Went Indie

          I feel like something big shifted in 2017. This is something I noticed a while ago and have slowly been building up my case. I feel like 2016 was the last year for pop stars, at least how they had been. In 2017 it all kinda shifted and pushed us in the direction we are now. Also for the record im mainly talking about pop music and pop stars.

     Im not sure how to start this, to be honest im not even sure what this means, but its more than a coincidence. The biggest albums of 2016 were by Adele, Drake, Rihanna, Justin Bieber, and the pop stars you’d expect. but in 2017 there was something new. The biggest album was DAMN by kendrick lamar. Now kendrick was obviously popular before, but damn was something new. Partly cause of its collaborators, but it felt indie. It felt weird. It was something different, not just for kendrick but for the popular rap scene. It was emotional, honest, and weird. The beats were weird, kendrick sounded weird. It was just new.      Tyler, the creator changed his entire image this year. He is honestly what inspired this idea. His album flower boy changed up his image entirely. Instead of the edgy show rapper hed been known as he suddenly shifted his image to bright, open, and...gay? it was all new and kinda weird. His collaborators are also super important to mention. Rex Orange County and Steve Lacy both received a massive boost from this and released their own popular projects this year. Also like Kendrick, Tyler made a new project that focused on himself and his emotional life. It was weird.

      I mentioned him before, but Rex Orange County blew tf up in 2017. After flowerboy came out he got a huge wave of support and released his debut album to decent success. It was a weird mix of folk, rock, rap, and blues. It also had that same brand of emotional honesty you’ll see everywhere. In 2017 we didnt want larger than life superstars, we wanted to see our faves depressed and struggling and trying new shit.

      Steve Lacy was the other person getting a huge boost from flowerboy. His single Dark Red blew up and got him a lot of attention. It was a new R&B type of song(which was a very popular genre that year.) Everyone was trying out R&B. But again we had a new artist burst out with a unique vibe and emotionally honest lyrics.

     Speaking of R&B, SZA released her most critically and commercially acclaimed album CTRL this year. She had had success before, but this fully pushed her into the mainstream with a shit ton of critical acclaim to back it up. Again, rising star with a unique vibe and emotional lyrics. the pattern has fully set in.

I could honestly keep listing artists for a while. Khalid, Harry Styles, Halsey, and Lorde all easily fit into this category and had some of their biggest success this year. However theres two big things to mention, one is what “success” means and the second is maybe the biggest example of this phenomenon. 

     So first off what is success. As im going through this list, odds are unless you’re into the indie scene you might not recommend everyone ive talked about. So why am i talking about their success like its obvious. Cause im defining it as success in the way that the indie scene sees it. All of these artists are easy to fidn as long as your ear is anywhere near the ground. If you have ever actively listened to music in the past couple years you would’ve heard most of these artists. But objectively thats hard to prove. Dark Red is Steve Lacy’s most popular song. If you listened to it now, youd probably recognize it. It has over 500 million streams on spotify. And yet it never made it onto the billboard charts. Not even a scratch. That happened a lot. The songs were all popular for everyone listening to music actively, but they never made it onto radio. So ther became this weird divide between active and passive music listeners. The popular artists were almost completely seperate. And there was one artist that encapsulated this perfectly.

     Billie Eilish released her debut EP dont smile at me in 2017. Every single song on that album has at least 200 million streams. idontwannbeyouanymore was the big single with over 800 million streams. Close to a billion. And yet it peaked at 96 on the billboard hot 100. Many early Billie Eilish songs are like this. Until her debut album none of her singles went higher than 60 on the hot 100. Regardless of how obviously popular they are. Her collab with Khalid, lovely has almost 2 billion streams and yet never broke the top 40. You would be hard pressed to find anyone under the age of 30 who hasn’t heard that song and many of her early work. But radio never picked it up. 

    I want to explore how this year affected the future of pop music, but first I want to look at where it came from. 2016 was obviously a turning point in pop music. I mentioned it before, but I mainly point this trend to three albums in 2016. lemonade by beyonce. Anti by Rihanna, and Blonde by Frank Ocean. These were some of the biggest albums of the year and they laid the ground work for huge pop stars to get personal, weird, out of the box, and still succesful. lemonade might be perfect example for this. Anyone with a brain will obviously know this album and its singles. but if you were only listening to pop singles it might have never entered your radar. Its this weird phenomenon where theres like a small barrier to get to the music. That barrier being actively paying attention to music. Anyone who is could easily find all these, but if you never put effort into it you might miss them.

     Now looking forward theres a few obvious exampled of this phenomenon. Billie Eilish is the easy one, and her success could be seen a million miles away. However I think Ariana Grande is a better representation of this effect. She had had hits for years, but with sweetener and especially thank u, next she dominated pop culture. These albums were massive and turned ariana into the superstar she is now. ironically enough she gained this superstar status by doing the same things we’ve seen before. Her lyrics got personal and emotional and her songs got weird. 

idk if any of this makes sense, but its been stuck in my head so i just wanted to write it down and see if any of it fits. Ill probably come back to later with some more full thoughts.

[wenightmareyou]

92 Truths

michaela @agentdanaascully isabelle @carefuldaughtercas and i found this old tag meme that michaela and i did in 2015 so we’re redoing it 7 years later! i cant believe we’ve been on here this long jfc

(copying all of my old answers and keeping the funny ones bc there are some gems in here)

Once you’ve been tagged, you’re supposed to write a note with 92 truths on it. At the end choose/tag 25 people. (not doing this lmao)

I was tagged by michaela and isabelle in real life lmao

OPTIONAL: NAME: Kodie AGE: 23 Now here are the 92 questions:

WHAT WAS YOUR: 1. last beverage = Tazo awake tea 😌 2. last phone call = my mom lol 3. last text message = isabelle carefuldaughtercas 4. last song you listened to = heaven help us live 5. last time you cried = today listening to heaven help us live lmao

HAVE YOU EVER: 6. dated someone twice = technically? 7. been cheated on = yup 🙃 8. kissed someone & regretted it = yes 9. lost someone special = like as in died? if so yes 10. been depressed = maybe 11. been drunk and threw up = no 😇 

LIST THREE FAVORITE COLORS: 12. RED (keeping this answer the same as 2015 bc im endeared by the all caps 🥺) 13. black 14. yellow

LAST YEAR (2014) (lmao) HAVE YOU: 15. Made a new friend = yes 16. Fallen out of love = no 17. Laughed until you cried = yes 18. Met someone who changed you = yes 19. Found out who your true friends were = obsessed w the 2014 energy radiating off of this question. um yes i do know who my true friends are and i love them 20. Found out someone was talking about you = yes in a good way? 21. Kissed anyone on your [FB, Twitter, Tumblr Etc] List? = no GENERAL: 22. How many people on your [Fb, Twitter, Tumblr Etc] list do you know in real life = i know so many mutuals irl i have no idea,,,, like 20? 24. Do you have any pets = no :( im definitely definitely gonna get either a cat or a bird after i graduate though 25. Do you want to change your name= I really think I will someday actually <—-awww that was my answer in 2015 and i did 🥰 i love my name now, if anything i could see myself changing my last name someday but that depends 26. What did you do for your last birthday = lmao got boba and watched the lost boys with michaela 27. What time did you wake up today = i think 11?

🚨THERES NO 28 🚨 

29. Name something you CANNOT wait for = for Panic! to finally start releasing new music <—LMAOO RIP AT MY 2015 ANSWER 💀 uhhhh the mcr shows this fall/seeing rhys darby on monday!! 30. Last time you saw your mother = maybe a week ago? 31. What is one thing you wish you could change about your life = I wish I could drive <—KEEPING MY 2015 ANSWER BC I STILL CANT FUCKING DRIVE but yeah god i wish 32. What are you listening to right now = the hum of the refrigerator/michaela and isabelle also filling this out rn 33. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom? = tom my best friend tom who’s tom? wambsgans 🥺 but no irl i dont think ive ever met a tom, i just have the fictional one i rotate in my mind 34. What’s getting on your nerves right now= waiting for a text back 🙄 35. Most visited webpage = tumblr dot edu dot gov 37. Nickname = i dont have one :(  38. Relationship Status = single 39. Zodiac sign = scorpio 40. He or She = they 41. Elementary School = tbh i wonder w old ask memes like this what kind of response they wanted. like are they asking the name of your school? are they asking if you enjoyed it? if you remember elementary school? bc honestly i do not remember elementary school, love and light 42. High School = again what do they want w this?  43. College = i miss it! a little bit! 44. Hair color = dark brown/red 45. Long or short = short 46. Height = 5'4" 47. Do you have a crush on someone? = no <3 48. What do you like about yourself? = i like to think im funny 49. Piercings = none 50. Tattoos = none 51. Righty or Lefty: righty

FIRSTS: 52. First surgery= wisdom teeth 53. First piercing = ears but i let them close 54. First best friend = her name was haley 55. First sport you joined = I’ve never actually done a sport before <—love the way i flat out lied when i did this in 2015 lmao. i did cross country for a few months when i was 13 56. First vacation = mexico 58. First pair of trainers = i’m sorry this is such a funny question i don’t know why someone would remember this

RIGHT NOW: 59. Eating = nothing 60. Drinking = tazo awake tea lmao 61. I’m about to = make lunch 62. Listening to = isabelle and michaela still lmao 63. Waiting for = a text back still!

YOUR FUTURE: 64. Want kids? = hmmm maybe? that sounds like a question for future me 65. Get Married? = ^^^ 66. Career? = finishing my last year of law school rn so probably a lawyer unless something drastic happens lmao

WHICH IS BETTER: 67. Lips or eyes = still both! 68. Hugs or kisses = kisses 69. Shorter or taller = taller 70. Older or Younger = preferably same age <—jfc this is still so true 71. Romantic or spontaneous = both! 72. Nice stomach or nice arms = not to be like all stomachs and arms are nice but they are :(( 73. Sensitive or loud = both 74. Hook-up or relationship = no comment 75. Trouble maker or hesitant = sun in trouble maker, rising hesitant, moon in hesitant

HAVE YOU EVER: 76. Kissed a stranger = yes 77. Drank hard liquor = yes 78. Lost glasses/contacts = yes 79. Have dated = yes 80. Broke someone’s heart = i think so? 81. Had your own heart broken = yes 82. Been arrested = no 83. Turned someone down = yes 84. Cried when someone died = yes 85. Fallen for a friend = i’m gay of course

DO YOU BELIEVE IN: 86. Yourself = yes 87. Miracles = maybe? 88. Love at first sight = okay like yes but not in the way where you’re literally in love with them? but i definitely think you can have one interaction w someone and *know* if you had more time together you would fall in love 89. Heaven = yes maybe kind of but also no except when its yes but not actually yes no <3 90. Santa Claus = no 91. Kiss on the first date = lol yes 92. Angels = im copying isabelle and michaela and saying cas 

this was so fun, i cant believe we’ve been on here long enough to make these answers dated and cringy. i’m not tagging anyone but do if you want to! if im still on here in seven more years i’ll do this again lmao

#long post // #my post #i cringed so much during this but also 🥺 at us being tiny babies on the internet being asked if we’ve had hard liquor or gone to college😭

[apocalypticgargoyle]

Ok you amazing person. Demon Sapnap, but the reader is really sick or maybe is in an accident and ends up in hospital. Sapnap and Dream both visit and get jealous of eachother. Eventually Dream leaves and Sapnap is just there like 👁👄👁 And then after a day or two the reader is finally home and Sapnap is like really pent up because he has been jealous Horny and reader has been in hospital and he just rails them, but softly because reader is still weak. Basically jealous soft-dom Demon Sapnap.

This is just an idea- by no means do you have to write it :)

I'm begrudgingly writing Dre as Mr. Steal Your Girl for obvious reasons (/ j), but also I couldn't pass down this idea for incubus 3 ;) I'm also going to include a few other requests I had about Sap's backstory and some smut. enjoy!

𝐀𝐍𝐆𝐄𝐋𝐒 & 𝐃𝐄𝐌𝐎𝐍𝐒. ⛧ 𝐢𝐧𝐜𝐮𝐛𝐮𝐬!𝐬𝐚𝐩𝐧𝐚𝐩 (𝟏𝟖+)

warnings: smut (18+), spanking, degradation, thigh riding, domination, literally quoting the b!ble

here's a playlist for those of you that were asking for it. i would love to see what the rest of you are listening to :)

previous part

You opened your eyes slowly, the ache in your body fully coming to your attention as you noticed the metronome of beeps coming from the machines connected to the tubes in your arm. You turned your head, squinting as your eyes struggled to focus on the figure beside you. After a few minutes, your brain pieced together his features and your heart eased when you realized it was Sapnap. For some, obviously ungodly reason, his presence brought you a sense of calm.

His feet were kicked up on the edge of your bed, his eyes scanning over a magazine as he chewed on his bottom lip absent-mindedly. He was dressed more casually than he usually was, probably an attempt at blending into the general public. You reached out a hand, fingers brushing against the soft material of his dark crewneck to get his attention. His gaze moved to look at you, a smirk painting across his pink lips.

You cleared your throat, tongue feeling like sandpaper. “What happened?” You grumbled, reaching beside him for the remote to elevate your head.

He watched your movements carefully. “You got a fever and then passed out cold,” he reminded you softly, making you groan. “Dehydration.” You couldn’t remember what he was talking about, only feeling nauseous in the middle of the night.

“How long have I been here?” You asked, rolling your head on your shoulders as your neck cracked, your limbs popping as you moved slightly. The IV pinched your arm as you moved, making you hiss quietly, making his eyes focus on where it was attached.

He hummed in thought. “A few hours. They wanna keep you until tomorrow, just in case you die or something,” he shrugged, tossing the magazine on the couch in the corner of the room.

You rubbed one of your eyes, a yawn rippling through you. “And why are you here?”

He chuckled. “Obvious reasons,” he stated, nodding towards the bite on your shoulder. “Also, Saint Dream was the first on your emergency contact list, so…” You pulled your knees to your chest as you looked at him.

“Even if it’s just because you have a quota to meet, I’m glad you’re here,” you muttered and something flickered behind his eyes, a smug expression tugging at his lips.

He leaned forward to rest his elbows on his knees, feet planted on the ground. “You’re not part of my quota, baby.” Your cheeks flushed at his words but before you could respond, he tensed up, eyes clouding with a darkened gold. They always shifted when something was intruding. You furrowed your brows at him. “Lupus in fabula venit enim ad me,” he mumbled darkly, the venom of sarcasm dripping from his voice as a knock came at your door.

Clay stuck his head through the threshold, eyes softening at you. Sapnap watched him silently as he stepped inside, rambling off how worried he was about you. Clay seemed to ignore Sapnap’s presence as he settled a batch of roses on your nightstand. Sapnap rolled his eyes and once Clay finally acknowledged him, he made a face like he was smelling something rotten. Sapnap looked like he was ready to snap Clay in half if he approached you closer, yet his dark demeanor didn’t dissuade Clay. In fact, it seemed like Clay was hell-bent on ruffling his feathers more, pulling up a chair on the other side of you.

“I didn’t think he would be here,” Clay commented, voice dipping slightly as his sights shifted toward Sapnap, irises flashing brighter. You perked an eyebrow at him.

Sapnap scoffed, leaning back in his seat. “I’m here because she wants me here,” he commented, nearly with a boasting tone. “So, it seems like I’m in the right role to ask what the fuck you think you’re doing.” You kept silent as the two played their game of wits and egos.

Clay smirked at him as if he was in possession of some esoteric knowledge. It dawned on you that you weren’t sure how old either of them actually was. You had dated Clay for god knows how many years, yet you learned more about his past from Sapnap than you had in any of the years you were together. “It’s still in her best interest that she be given options that don’t involve your kind,” he gritted.

Sapnap laughed shortly, a cockiness settling into his appearance. “Oh yeah? In her best interest or in yours, you selfish prick.”

Clay’s jaw tensed, a sigh flooding from his nose. “We can do this more maturely, you know? Like fucking professionals.”

Sapnap shook his head. “I’m not up for negotiating,” the stated bluntly. “Go near her again and I’ll report you,” he assured, his deadpanned stare making your heartbeat quicken.

Clay swallowed, eyes glued to Sapnap’s as the pair of them flexed their dominant personalities. Clay’s eyebrow twitched as if he had thought of something, almost mockingly. “Begone, Satan, inventor and master of all deceit,” he began, making Sapnap roll his eyes again before cutting into Clay’s quote.

“-enemy of man’s salvation. Give place to Christ in Whom you have found none of your works,” he mocked. “Try and exorcise me all you want, feather boy.”

Clay’s hand moved to curl around your wrist and Sapnap leaned against the bed, as if asking Clay to make his next move. “Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour-“

“Resist him, standing firm in the faith, because you know that the family of believers throughout the world is undergoing the same kind of sufferings,” Sapnap cantered without a thought. “It’s not even the right verse for this, stupid bitch,” he grumbled.

You cleared your throat, pulling your arm away from Clay and trying not to look as if you were slinking towards Sapnap. “You should leave,” you stated, Clay’s lips pursing at your words. “I need to rest.” Out of the corner of your eye, you could see Sapnap’s sly expression cutting into Clay.

After spending another night in the hospital, you were finally unlocking your apartment door and letting Sapnap help you out of your coat. You mumbled something about getting yourself a drink and he brushed you off, already doing it himself. Your mind was racing with questions after what you had witnessed between Clay and Sapnap. You hadn’t doubted the authenticity of Sapnap, but your mind still ran with what had happened to him. He handed you a water, sitting down on your couch as you paced slightly.

He broke into your thoughts. “Go on, tell me what you’re thinking,” he stated, unbuttoning his shirt slightly. You wanted to hex him about the fact that he probably already knew what was pounding against your temples to be asked.

You chewed on the inside of your cheek, rolling over your questions to censor some of them. “The bible’s been translated and reprinted so many times, how are you still…” you gestured with your hands, unable to explain where you were going with your statement.

He chuckled, brushing a hand against his chin. “It really doesn’t matter if it’s actually God’s word or not. It’s a guide, like an outline. Rules, I guess. Think about it like the Constitution.”

“I thought demons like… burned up when someone quoted the bible at them…”

His face fell a bit at this. “No, we just can’t read it,” his tone was almost regretful, sending guilt to pulse through your body because you had asked. “It’s like it’s in a completely different language, and each time I look at it, it shifts around the page. When you get dragged into hell, something happens with your eyes.” He huffed slightly, wetting his lips. “It's kind of like an isolation thing. He wants you to be completely aside from him.”

Your mind clicked, eyeing your heirloom display case. “Can I try something?” You asked, popping open one of the doors after he hummed in response. You fished out your grandmother’s rosary, the cross feeling almost heavy in your hands. You turned on your heel, bringing it closer to him before dangling it in front of him. His eyes drifted away from it, his gaze turning up to you. “Does this bug you?” You probed, making him snort. He took it in his hand, thumb caressing over the design.

He shook his head, chewing on his lip. “It’s a shameful thing really. I feel guilty whenever I look at this kind of stuff,” he muttered; you sat on the arm of his chair and looked over his shoulder. He turned, looping it around your neck. “Does it bug you?”

You held it away from your chest. “For different reasons, I guess.” You stood again, putting it back in its spot beside a photo of your grandfather. “Why’d you get kicked out?” You queried softly, peering over your shoulder.

He was watching you. “Maybe another time.”

“What about your childhood?” You asked. “Did you have one?”

“I know more about your childhood than I do my own. Why all the questions?” He countered with a soft laugh.

You shrugged. “I want to get to know you…” You mumbled, your hand drifting up to rest on your shoulder, feeling heat coming off of his scaring bite mark. “How do you know when to show up?”

He sighed, leaning his back against the chair and stretching his legs. “I can feel when you get anxious. Angels have some kind of block though, that’s why it took me so long to realize you needed me when that bastard was over here.” He shook his head almost like a new fire about Dream had been lit. His eyes flickered up to you. “Unless you weren’t scared.” You shook your head quickly at his joke. He chuckled. “How does it make you feel that I’m in your head sometimes?”

You approached him again. “Narcissistic,” you answered plainly, sinking to your knees before him. You ran your hands up his thighs, a smirk growing on his features as he sat up to be closer to you. “What happens after I die? Eternal damnation?” You questioned, as his hand went to brush against your arms.

He pressed his lips to your neck before digging his fingers into your hair as if he’d been waiting to touch you for days. You hummed as he kissed you, the slight scruff of his unshaven face feeling soft against your cheek. “You shouldn’t have to worry about that. I think I’ll make you immortal or something. Being with me should be enough damnation,” he jeered, making you laugh. “Most of my colleagues take the souls of their targets and leave, but I enjoy your company,” he teased.

“But you already have my soul, right?” The line felt strange coming from your mouth.

His lips brushed against yours. “There’s still an innocent piece of you that I haven’t tapped into. Everyone has it; I like it in you.”

Your eyebrows perked at this, fingers digging into his thighs to make him groan. “What do you mean?”

He kissed you briefly, actions getting needier the longer you were between his legs. “It’s completely pure. Untampered by sin or desire. When a demon gets it, they go feral,” he mumbled, nose pressing into the crook of your neck, teeth dragging across your skin.

You tilted your head to the side, fingers tracing over his zipper. “Take it from me,” you breathed, leaning into his touch.

“No,” he answered blatantly.

You moaned as his tongue slipped against your collarbones. “I want you to have it,” you continued, voice uneven. His fingers tugged at your hair.

His breath was warm against your shoulders. “I’ll take it after a few years. I don’t want it now.”

You pushed him away from you, his eyes already blown with lust as you looked into them. “You just said demons want it so badly. Take mine.”

He chuckled, hands dropping to your jaw. “No,” he repeated, voice light.

You sat back on your heels, looking up at him with a tilted expression. “Is mine not good enough for you?”

He wheezed. “No, it’s perfect. I just… After I take it, it’s like you’re dead. You’re not the same. Your humanity is gone.” He pulled you back up towards him. “I’ll take it when I’m ready to escort you to hell.”

You quipped an eyebrow. “Oh, so you just don’t want me to see your place?” You joked, making him roll his eyes. “Maybe Clay was right. What’s the verse about confession?”

His eyes darkened playfully. “For with the heart one believes and is justified, and with the mouth one confesses and is saved.” It was mind boggling how he could probably quote the whole Bible and was as… sinful… as he was. “Bring up Dream again, and I’ll make sure you can’t walk for a week.”

Your eyelashes fluttered. “You bargain for a fun game," you quipped.

He chuckled darkly. "It was more a light-hearted threat, dove," he muttered.

You sat forward and pressed your lips against his hungrily, letting him pull you into his lap as his fingers curled into the loose ends of your hair. Your fingers ripped at the buttons of his shirt, exposing his chest to you as he tugged at your own clothing. Your teeth dragged against his lips as his hips ground up against you, needy for friction.

You pushed your tongue into his mouth, moaning as his hands moved to your thighs, his blunt nails raking against your jeans. You rolled your hips against his lap, feeling him harden beneath you. He spread his legs further, coaxing you to grind against him as his hands pushed you down to rut against his leg.

You were breathless as you pulled away from him, one of his hands fisting in your t-shirt to bring you close to him, lips and tongue pressing against your neck. "I didn't tell you to stop riding my thigh," he commented darkly, bouncing his knee to make you moan.

Your hand wrapped around the wrist of his hand holding you in place, tugging your bottom lip between your teeth as heat spread across your body. He pulled your shirt over your head, your bare chest at his mercy. Your mind blurred at the sensation and the feeling of him sucking his mark into your skin, making it clear who you belonged to.

You moaned, digging your face into his neck as he rolled his hips against your leg. "Please, Sapnap. I need you," you whimpered, voice a soft whisper in his ear. He chuckled darkly, ripping your pants down your legs as you fumbled to unzip his slacks.

He pulled you onto him without warning, a groan leaving your lips as he suddenly filled you up. "Bold of you to beg for me after associating with that bastard," he bit, thrusting up into you. "I should tie you up and let you suffer for that."

You moaned at his dark tone, grinding your hips against him. Your lips ghosted against his as your cheeks began to feel warm from the stimulation. "I might like that," you jested, your sentence breaking with your voice as he harshly grabbed your hips, driving himself into you harder.

"You're lucky you're still weak," he nipped, voice swirling with lust and power. "I'd throw you over my knee for that comment." His fingers dug into your hips, grinding against you as you bounced on top of him. You moaned at his words. His hand snaked up to wrap around your throat, threatening to apply pressure as he continued to direct your movements, thrusting into you at a deep and reserved pace. "Dirty girl. You want me to punish you, don't you?"

When all you could do was mutter a small beg, he pulled you closer to him, lips meeting yours in a mess of hair, teeth, and tongue. He moaned into your mouth, the taste of his breath was addictive and bliss-inducing.

He pulled you off of him and onto the couch beside him, slipping his shirt the rest of the way off. "I'll fuck the angel lover out of you," he joshed, a hand coming down sharply across your ass; the pain making you moan his name, hands gripping the couch as he pressed your shoulders into the cushion.

He dragged your hips into the air, pushing into you again, rocking his hips against yours with a small grunt. His teeth were sharp against your skin as he pounded into you and an animalistic pace, your mind numbing at the feeling. He pushed your knees further apart to pump himself deeper into you.

You moaned as his weight settled on the hand pinning you to the couch, your hair sticking to your sweaty face as he spanked you again, hand gripping your irritated skin. "Good girl. Take it," he nearly growled, making your skin crawl with an added layer of pleasure. While his pace and mannerisms were ruthless, he was definitely holding back, knowingly going easy on you because of your already weak body. That didn't mean he wasn't reminding you of your sour attitude as he pulled your arm behind your back, his hips snapping against your own to firmly instill his name in your mind.

You reached for the arm rest, a grounding element for you as his motions drove you over the edge in a teeth gritting orgasm, boy flushing with goosebumps under his command. You rocked your hips back against him as he pulled out, jerking himself off instead of giving you the satisfaction of finishing him off.

You groaned as you turned to look at him. "Feeling okay?" He asked, pressing his lips to your shoulder blade. You shook your head quickly and his eyebrow quipped ever so slightly. "Good," he stated, pulling you up and onto the ground in front of him again. He grabbed your cheeks. "I still don't think you've learned," he muttered, leaning back into his previous position. "Blow me," he directed, tucking an arm behind his head. "And with the mouth, one confesses and is saved, remember," he taunted.

Your eyes flashed up to his devious expression as he leered at you from his commanding spot.

It was going to be a long night.

And you were ready for it.

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