#ive been possessed and honestly it's fine

[ty-bayonet-betteridge]

two of the transfems youre friends with have been talking to you about the clinic they got their bottom surgery done at. apparently its dirt cheap, and the surgeon - despite some oddities and, your friends admit, poor hygiene - is incredibly talented. theyre more than happy to give you her phone number when you ask, and while it sounds simultaneously incredibly sketchy and way too good to be true, at this point youre just so broke, desperate, and tired of gatekeepers that you're willing to give it a shot.

you call on a thursday afternoon, and the call is picked up on the fourth ring, when youre just gearing up to hear an answering machine. the voice on the other end sounds like a middle-aged woman with a smoking habit trying to sound like a cheery, bubbly young girl, and mostly succeeding. hiiiii! what can i do for you? she asks. you say er im looking for a surgical clinic is this the right number? she says mhm! thats me. you say okay, i just have a few questions. she says shoot. you say do you take patients who arent referred to you? she says nobody refers patients to me so yes. then she giggles. youve never heard somebody pull off a giggle in real life. you ask okay, so ive been looking for a place to get my metoidoplasty done, can you do that here? she says i dont know what that is give me like five seconds. then the line goes silent. you can hear her typing on a mechanical keyboard and humming to herself as she reads. youre now convinced that this is not in any way a legitimate medical institution.

youre about to hang up when she comes back on the line. OH you need a dick she says. sure i can do that! does tuesday afternoon work for you? i have that morning free too but i HATE getting up in the mornings so id rather not schedule it if i have to. you say tuesday afternoon is fine, how long should i expect the visit to be? she says i dont know like seven hours? you say seven hours? she says yeah give or take a few, every person is different so i dont know what itll be like until ive got your cunt opened up. honestly probably best to take the whole day off just in case it turns out to be a tough operation. you dont respond to that immediately. she says oh shoot should i not use the word cunt, is that too gendered? sorry. you say no its fine. you say i thought i was just going in for a consult? she says i mean yeah if youd rather. i dont mind doing same-day but some people like having more time to think about their options. do you have somewhere to be tuesday night or something? you say no its just... no tuesday afternoon should be fine. she says okay great!

she gives you her address. she says knock three times so i know its you and not my parole officer. parole officer you ask? she says im being good i promise but i still hate talking to him hes boring. you say if you dont mind me asking what were you imprisoned for? she says the ones i plead guilty to at the trial were a hundred and ninety-two counts of first-degree murder with a parahuman ability, two hundred and fifty-six counts of physical and emotional torture with a parahuman ability, five hundred and six counts of intentional infliction of emotional distress with a parahuman ability, four hundred ninety-eight counts of aggravated assault and battery with a parahuman ability, four hundred twenty five counts of domestic terrorism with a parahuman ability and two hundred and twelve counts without, three counts of arson, two hundred forty two counts of burglary with a parahuman ability, three hundred eight four counts of robbery with a parahuman ability, four hundred twenty seven counts of abduction with a parahuman ability, a hundred eighty six counts of human trafficking with a parahuman ability, three hundred ninety counts of destruction of public property with a parahuman ability, eighty counts of possession of a controlled substance, more than three thousand conspiracy and complicity charges in various felonies, eighteen violations of the Geneva Conventions, and the unauthorized practice of medicine. i plead not guilty to the larceny, sexual assault, contempt of court, corporate espionage, and identity theft charges and the prosecutor didnt really try to fight it since i had already earned seventy life sentences from the other stuff so im technically innocent of those.

you dont say anything to that.

after three seconds of silence she says sooooooooo i'll see you tuesday? you say tuesday, yeah. what was your name again? Riley, she says. Riley Grace Davis. you say thanks again and then hang up.

you debate constantly during the intervening days whether you should go on tuesday. youre grateful your friend group is so slutty; it means youve already seen with your own eyes that this surgery is real and not just a lure to murder you. still, you have some reservations, which you think is perfectly understandable.

you call one of your friends whos been there already. she picks up and you say if this is a joke its only sort of funny. she says if whats a joke? you say the clinic. you say you DID give me the actual number to the place where you actually had your bottom surgery done right? she says yeah, dont worry the surgeons so sweet. you say she admitted to doing two hundred murders when she was on the phone. she says i dont know anything about that but i trust her. you say if i end up dead, kidnapped, or mutilated, its your fault. she says dont worry about it.

tuesday comes. you never agreed to an exact time so you show up as early as you can and still have it be "afternoon" in your mind - 12:30. you climb the rusted fire escape to the third floor door and knock three times. the door is answered by a woman six feet tall in casual but very nice clothes with frizzy brown hair and an expression you cant read. you say er, riley? she says nope. another girl pushes past her, exasperated. she's maybe five foot two and her wavy blonde hair is worn down, with a red bow in it. she's wearing torn jeans - naturally torn, not the sort that you buy with holes in them that youve always hated but the kind that were once normal jeans and now have worn through much of the fabric on the knees. her tshirt is faded and has stains that you cant quite place on it, but youre pretty sure it was once Eidolon merchandise.

she says damnit amy let me answer the door next time. the taller woman, amy apparently, shrugs and steps aside to let you in riley claps her hands together once youre inside and the door is shut. introductions! she shouts. amy, this is, er... I never actually got your name? you tell them your name. she says right! hes one of my clients. and this is Amy, my sister. dont worry about her, shes just a little awkward. amy says can you PLEASE not introduce me as your sister. riley says make me. then she grabs amys shirt and pulls her down, standing on her tiptoes at the same time. they kiss in a very un-sisterly way. you clear your throat politely.

riley breaks away and says right, yeah, sorry! i get distracted easy. youre here to get a dick right. you splutter a bit, both at the bluntness of the question and the fact that amy is still standing right there. riley follows your gaze. she says oh dont worry about her! sorry, i wouldve run her off earlier, i thought you wouldnt come by for another few hours. you say sorry. she says dont worry, its her fault. amy says you didnt tell me you had a client. riley says you didnt ASK. you clear your throat politely again. you say er yes, i did come in for metoidoplasty. she bites her lip and furrows her brow. she says metoido... oh right. well i dont really do that here but i can give you a dick. you say uh im not really interested in phalloplasty. she says whats phalloplasty? amy says its the construction of a penis, usually via tissue flap taken from another part of the body, often followed by the insertion of prosthetics to allow the constructed penis to achieve erection. riley says oh, huh. yeah i dont do that either. i can give you a dick though. she takes a second then puts on an exaggerated scowl. who would want that she asks? amy says lots of people prefer it to metoido for aesthetic reasons or because they dont think theyll be large enough for penetrative sex with metoido. riley says but it wouldnt feel like a dick! man, some surgeons are talentless hacks.

you clear your throat again. you say so if youre- riley says youre clearing your throat a lot, are you okay? you say im fine, its just- she says oh duh were being so rude! why are we all standing around here. come sit down in the living room, do you want anything to drink? she leads you into the living room. it has the unmistakable air of a room thats been cleaned recently, with vacuuming marks present in the carpet and the unmistakable scent of air freshener. the sofa that you're gestured to sit on is, by contrast, unbelievably filthy. stains of every sort are visible on it - some of them are obvious, like the patches of blood and vomit or the ring of a coffee mug. others take you a second to place, like the crusty streak along one cushion that you realize all at once is semen, or the sticky yellow parts that you hope to god are honey. some of them, like the muddy green handprint along one arm of the sofa or the deep black smudge along a seat, are completely foreign to you. you can smell it from several feet away.

amy notices your hesitancy. she says i keep telling her to throw that thing out. riley says and i keep telling HER that its a relic from earth bet! its an antique and itll be worth millions soon. it just needs a good deep cleaning. amy says what that sofa needs is a bullet, not a deep clean. you sit down. drink? riley asks. you say er what do you have? she says water, diet coke, vodka, coffee. no more beer though, SOMEBODY drank the last one. amy says you never said they were off limits! riley says they arent, im just teasing. you say waters fine. riley says aaaaaaaaaamyyyyyyy, could you pleeeeeeaaaaaaaase go get our guest a glass of water and me a diet coke? oh and can you grab the pill bottle on the second shelf of the spice cabinet. amy says sure, i'll be right back.

riley sits down next to you. she says sooooooo what do you want for your dick? you say sorry, if youre not doing phallo or metoido then what exactly are you offering? she says no offense but it would take like literally eight years to give you enough background info for you to understand my explanation, and i dont have that kind of time. im not getting any younger. except for when i am. she laughs louder than you thought a human could. you have no idea how to describe the sound of her laughter. she says just tell me about your dream dick and ill give it to you. trust me, im a doctor.

except that youre not, amy says, returning with glasses and pills in hand. she sets the water down in front of you and you immediately take large gulps, feeling very much lost right now. riley says am TOO, accepting the pill bottle and diet coke from amy. she frowns. why is it can diet coke, she asks? she says glass bottle is so much better. she says why did i even BUY can. amy says they are literally the same liquid, what do you mean its better. riley says theyre not the same, stop deluding yourself. amy says which of us is the REAL doctor? riley says both of us! the PRT finally issued me an equivalency. youre talking to doctor riley davis, MED. amy says oh really? congrats she says. riley beams. then she unscrews the lid of the unlabeled, dark brown glass bottle, grabs three pills, and pops them into her mouth.

what is that you ask. ectasy she says. you want some? you say no thanks. she says you sure? you say i probably shouldnt take drugs before an operation, what if it interacts with the anesthetic? riley says dont worry, i made my own anesthetic that has zero drug-drug interactions. amy says except with sudafed. riley says ok YEAH except with sudafed, how was i supposed to know? she glances at you. you dont take sudafed do you she asks. you say no. she says good. it was such a bitch cleaning the pus off the ceiling she says. you say huh? she says dont worry about it, you dont take sudafed. she says are you sure you dont want any ecstasy? i promise its pure. you say i dont want to get addicted. she says i can surgically remove the addiction pathway from your brain if that would help. amy says riley, no means no. riley says fine. do you want any ecstasy babe? she says no thanks. riley frowns. she says you guys are a bunch of squares. she pops a fourth one and starts chugging diet coke.

she slams the can down after drinking what must be half of it, wipes her mouth with her arm and grins. sorry, we keep getting distracted! she says. she says im getting into the start of a manic episode and that always makes me roll right over people in conversation. what do you want for your dick? you say um. i hadnt really thought about it. its not normally a choice beyond the type of surgery, you sort of just end up with whatever the doctors are able to make work? thats lame she says. why are normal doctors all so lame she says. ok, rude amy says. OBVIOUSLY im not talking about you babe riley says. and stop distracting me from my client! amy holds up her hands in mock surrender, an easy smile on her face.

you didnt bring a toy with you did you, riley asks. you say huh. she says sometimes people bring a toy that they want me to model it after and that makes everything a lot easier. you say no you didn't. you say i hadn't really thought about my preferences, can we go dealer's choice on this? amy pipes up. she says you REALLY dont want riley to go dealers choice. riley says shut up and get me another diet coke, i just finished this one. amy says yes princess. you honestly cant read whether it was meant to be mocking or endearing. riley turns back to you. ok, she says, lets start with basics. primate? canid? equine? suine? dolphin? i could give you a hyena pseudopenis but i dont know if that would be offensive. you say human is fine. she says please dont tell me you're gonna just be boring this whole time. you say define boring. she sighs deeply and starts massaging her temples. amy, having stepped into the room in time to hear the last bit of conversation, tousles rileys hair. she says sorry babe, customer's always right.

you work out the appearance of your soon-to-exist cock this way. riley asks questions about length, girth, hair, amount of semen generated, percentage growth when erect, and you try to give what you think are average answers every time. amy watches, bemused, the whole time. halfway through she leaves to get the bottle of vodka. she drinks five shots in fifteen minutes. you say i didnt think the human body had that much capacity for alcohol resistance. she says it doesnt. riley swats playfully at her arm.

eventually, riley grabs a set of crayons and a cocktail napkin. she says ok, i think we got it, scribbling furiously. she shows you a crayon drawing of a dick. this look good she asks? you squint at it. there are no measurements given and the medium does not allow you to make out any fine detail. you say yeah thats fine. amy tries and fails to hide a smile. riley chucks the napkin aside and rubs her hands together. boring parts done! she says. time to get messy she says. amy pours a sixth shot of vodka. she says dont forget the anesthetic first. riley rolls her eyes. she says OBVIOUSLY i didnt forget the anesthetic. she says ill be right back. as soon as she leaves the room, amy knocks back her shot. she turns to you. she says you mind if i stay and watch? she says i dont want to make you uncomfortable, but i like watching her work. shes cute when shes working. you say at this point youre not sure you would mind anything at all. you say at this point you dont think you would be fazed if she came back with a fully-formed dick wriggling around in her hand like a fish and sewed it onto me. she says dont tempt fate.

riley comes back with a black bag the size of her head, which she sets on the coffee table with a thunk. she points at you and says okay, clothes off. or pants off i guess. you can leave the shirt on. or take it off. i dont care. you take it off. she tells you to lie down and starts pulling things out of the bag. amy stands up from the sofa to give you the space to stretch out and sits on the coffee table instead, one leg pulled up to her chest with her chin resting on her knee.

riley pulls out a syringe from the bag, filled with pitch-black fluid. she says okay this will hurt for a second but only for a second. you say huh? she flips you over onto your belly and jabs the needle against your lower back, into your spinal column. it hurts like a bitch for all of two seconds and then you stop feeling anything at all in your lower body. you also cant move your legs, you realize. what just happened you ask, as she flips you onto your back again. she says i just killed all the cells in the nerves in your lower spine. she says its the easiest way to make sure none of the pain signals slip through, and she'll just replace them with living ones when she's done. you don't know how to respond to that.

she pulls more things out of the bag. a cartoonish array of different cutting implements come out. most of them are various sizes of medical scalpel, ring cutter, or saw, but you also see a pair of chunky pink safety scissors, a pizza cutter, a serrated bread knife, an x-acto, a drill with a comically long bit, a pair of wire cutters, gardening shears, and an awl. she says okay im gonna start operating so look away if you dont wanna see how your crotch looks while its being rearranged. especially if you think you might puke, i hate having to stop to clean up puke in the middle of surgery. you look away. you notice amy is watching transfixed.

for a couple of hours things go on like that. amy and riley make light conversation, with riley filling any silence by humming a wordless tune you dont know. the sounds and smells youre getting are enough to make you slightly sick; you continue not looking.

in the middle of hour two, riley stops. oh goddamnit, she says. what amy asks? riley says she forgot that shed need extra meat. amy says you started a surgery to give somebody a whole new organ and forgot youd need more tissue to do it? riley says shut up, im dumb. amy says no youre not babe. riley says ughhhhh now what. amy says just get his stem cells to grow the tissue you need. riley says nooooooo thatll take forever, and i have places to BE tomorrow, and if i stop putting pressure on him here hes going to bleed out through his cunt. you say wait, what? amy says well i dont know what you want me to do about this situation, i gave you my solution. riley says baaaaaaaaaaabe. amy says whaaaaaaaaaaaat. riley says i think we have some bacon in the fridge, will you pretty please with sprinkles on top go get it? amy says and what do i get in return? riley says a kiss. amy says id get that anyway. riley says my undying love and affection. amy says i have that already. riley says not making me angry at you so you can sleep under my roof without having to worry that ill turn your sweat glands into acid glands in the middle of the night. amy says that, plus i get to top tonight. riley says fiiiiiiiiine, just go get the bacon. amy gets up.

you say look uh i know you said not to question what youre doing but i kind of dont want a dick made of bacon, not to sound ungrateful. also did you say something about me bleeding out? riley says dont worry, if you bleed out ill put the blood back in, im a professional. you say thats not as reassuring as she thinks it is. riley says whos the doctor, mister? you say technically both of us. i have a phd in social sciences you say. she says wow, theyre just giving out doctorates for anything these days, huh? you say hey, rude. she says only teasing. you say anyway, uh, you didnt address the bacon dick thing? she says oh dont worry about it, my amys amazing, youll see.

amy comes back in with the package of bacon. do you need this in any particular shape she asks. riley says nah just give me a good amount of it. and make sure its spongy, so when he gets hard the blood can- amy cuts her off. she says dont worry, ive given you enough penises at this point that i think i know what penile tissue is like at this point. you say given her enough penises? what the hell does that mean? riley says hey, dont kinkshame! she sounds legitimately offended. you say sorry. amy pulls the bacon out of the package, holding it aloft in her left hand. you watch as the familiar look of a half-pound of bacon shifts and warps into a strange lump of fatty, spongy tissue of a waxy color. she hands it to riley. riley says thanks sis youre the best, love you! amy says no problem. riley says id kiss you if i wasnt elbow deep in this guys cunt right now. amy says kiss me after the surgerys done.

another two hours go by. the sounds of flesh being chopped, sawed, and stitched underscore riley and amys meaningless conversation about whether they HAVE to attend their acquaintance lisa's birthday party. riley says lisa probably wouldn't throw a birthday party if there wasn't some sort of scheme going on. amy agrees but says that doesnt indicate whether they should get involved with the scheme or not. you wonder dimly if you will ever feel your lower body again. you wonder if this is purgatory, an endless afternoon of lesbians bickering affectionately while one of them does surgery on you. you turn your head enough to look at the clock. its 5:26pm. where the fuck did the time go?

another hour passes. riley stands up. she is soaked up to her elbow in various bodily fluids - mostly blood, but youre not looking too closely. she says finally! she says just need to regrow your nerve cells now. you say is that going to take long? she says like twenty minutes maybe as she flips you over. you say ok. she jams a different needle into the same spot, injecting a strange yellow paste into your spine. she then flips you onto your back again. you feel brave enough to finally look at your crotch.

there is a completely normal human penis of average size there. you reach a hand down and touch it. you dont have any sensation in it yet since your nerves are all still dead, but it feels warm and soft under your hands. you smile, feeling tears come to your eyes. its over.

rileys talking. she says i followed your specifications except i had to cheat a bit on the nerves, you actually didnt have very many in your clit for whatever reason so your glans has maybe eight thousand fewer nerves than you wanted, sorry about that. she says i gave you balls in your scrotum for shape but since you said you didnt want kids they dont produce sperm. let me know if you want that changed she says. she says it should be fully functional in every respect, but if you notice any erectile dysfunction, incontinence, discoloration in urine or semen, priapism, or any other issue come back and we'll sort it out. if you notice it bleeding in ANY capacity, call me immediately. if im not answering call Amy, ill give you her number. if SHES not answering either then you can start seeing normal doctors, not that those idiots will know how to help you probably. if you want any changes to it call me and ill pencil you in to get it adjusted. get all that she asks. you nod. she says cool. she says itll be like $200, no rush if youre not able to pay right now. you say it might be a bit since youre still trying to pay interest on your student loan debt. wait, she says, they have student loans again? you nod. she says the world ended like thirty years ago, when did they set up student loans again? fuck, how much do you owe? you say a little under eighty thousand. she says jesus fuck, nevermind, its free. goddamn. you say thank you so much. she says yeah of course. do you want us to dress you or do you want to wait until you can move and do it yourself?

#wormblr #parahumans #worm spoilers #riley davis #riley grace davis #bonesaw #nsft #amy dallon #panacea #MY BELOVED GIRL. IS BACK #our writing #dr riley davis mde

[zeltqz]

having rindou as a clingy, needy fwb

content: safe sex, sexting, suggestive pics, rindou is a horny guy, needy guy, clingy guy, implied possessive rindou, fem!reader

a/n: ive been so inactive im so sorry guys i feel so bad :( uni has been literally kicking my BOOOOOTYYYY anyway enjoy this quick one shot with rindou :))

He’s bold.

You set the shopping bag down on the floor by your bed and began to unpack its contents, ready for a mini fashion show in front of your mirror when your phone chimed by your bedside table.

You were halfway with taking your top off when you heard the buzz and walked over to it and grabbed it.

rinnn wyd

You smiled at his random text message, eyes trained on your screen as you sat backwards onto your bed and texted back.

you Just came back from shopppinggg

Setting your phone down, you’re about to stand back up to head towards your mirror when he responds at lightspeed. Oh he must be so bored today, you snigger and decide to text him back.

rinnn What you get?

you Cant tell you thattttt Too personal

rinnn What was it? Lingerie?

you Oh um

rinnn No way. Pfft yeah right

you WHATS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN????

rinnn Nothing i just cant see you in that at all

you Well its true 

rinnn Sureeee Lemme see it

you Ok wait one second

You stand up from your bed and walk over to your bag, grab the lacy bra and matching panties set and place it flat on your bed. It took longer than a second to snap the photo as you wanted it to look perfect and presentable so you spent longer actually wiping stray crumbs from your bed, closing your curtains to get perfect lighting, straightening out your bedsheets in order to get the perfect photo.

Once you were pleased, you hopped back onto your bed and sent the photo to Rindou. As expected, since it took longer than you said to send the photo he went offline and you huffed impatiently. Ten minutes later your phone was buzzing and you zoomed for it eagerly, only for your smile to fade when you saw his response.

rinnn Thats not what i meant

you WDYM?????

rinnn Did you get it for your boyfriend?

you You know damn well i dont have a boyfriend

rinnn Lmfao i know. just checking

you what???

rinnn Show me the fit tho

you I did

rinnn Put it on

you oh…OHH Sure okay…

You weren’t expecting that at all honestly. Yet the idea of putting it on for Rindou weirdly turned you on. You bit your lip and stared down at the lacy material laid on your bed and slowly began to strip off your shirt and bottoms. Once it was on, you quickly walked up to the mirror and examined how it looked on you. 

It was the cheapest matching set available in store and you weren’t rich by any means so it’ll have to do. You quickly grabbed your phone and snapped a photo of you standing in the mirror. 

The photo was horrible. You were stiff, awkward and you accidentally took the photo in the middle of blinking. You wanted to cry but you couldn’t find the confidence left in yourself to retake it, so you cropped your face out and sent the photo to Rindou without a second thought. 

It all happened so quickly that you failed to realise the gravity of what you just did until you saw Rindou read the message. Your eyes widened and you tossed your phone across the room, flopping instantly onto your bed and thrashing between the sheets for a minute or two to let your frustrations and anxieties out. 

It was the first time you ever sent someone intimate photos and you made a promise to your younger self that you’d wait until you were in an official relationship to do that. But here you were sending them to your best friend just because you wanted his approval for reasons that were beyond you.

Your phone buzzed minutes later and you peeked an eye open at your phone from across the room, took a deep breath then reached for it.

rinnn Damn u look so sexy right now

you Lol stop Thank you tho

rinnn Send another

you Desperate much?

rinnn Coming from the girl buying lingerie for herself

you Nothing wrong with that :( But fine wait

You feel exceptionally giddy when you stand up from your bed, your confidence rising back up in copious amounts as you waddle towards your mirror. This time, you recorded a short video of you from side to side, showing off your assets as seductively as you possibly could before sending it to him.

His response only spurs you on even more.

rinnn Would u kill me if i was hard rn

you Probably yes Flattered, but yes

rinnn How would u kill me?

you Choke you maybe. Or like suffocation and prolong it as long as i can

rinnn With your thighs? I wont mind that

Your face flushes as your thumbs freeze over your keyboard.

you OML YOURE SO HORNY I DIDN'T MEAN IT LIKE THAT

rinnn Thats how i took it 

you Yeah i know, you weirdo

rinnn How would you suffocate me though?

you With my hands duhhhhhh. Actually maybe a pillow. More surface area.

rinnn You’ll be on top of me?

The image of you on top of him with your hands around his throat plagued your mind and you were lost for words for the third time tonight. It didn’t even occur to you that you were sexting your best friend.

you If that's how you want to go out then yes

rinnn It is

you Then i will

rinnn Good

You This escalated so fast Goodbye rindou 

He’s needy.

His phone is ringing. 

Rindou’s phone is ringing whilst he’s on top of you, lips kissing and sucking your soft skin just under your jaw as his cock thrusts slowly into you. Your hands are playing with his hair, running your fingers through them, scratching at his scalp when his cock reaches that spot inside you with enough force to tease, not satisfy you. 

You’d been begging him to go rougher, want to hear the loud slap of his hips against yours but he’d been so adamant on taking his sweet time, like his phone hasn’t been ringing for the last thirty seconds.

“Rinnnnnn,” you grumble irritatedly, the soft strokes you were doing on his hair now turned to a full on tug , as harsh as you could, with enough force to completely still his lips on your neck. 

He pulls away from you and lifts himself up onto his arms, looking down at you with a peeved expression on his face.

“What.” His hips still don’t still, thrusting ever so slightly into you but keeps on managing to hit that spot regardless and see your eyes roll as you bite down your lip to stifle a moan. 

Unlinking your arms from around his neck, you try to reach over to the bedside table but your arms are too short. Grumbling, you try to shift and Rindou just stills entirely, watching you grab his phone that was face down as it rang continuously for the last minute. 

Missed call: Dad

Missed call: Dad

Your eyebrows raise as you read the contact and turn the phone towards Rindou. He clicks his tongue, irritated your attention is off him and grabs the phone. 

“It’s just my old man, who cares?” He tosses the phone backwards on the bed, this time you can’t reach it if it rings again and his thrusts restart, slowly rolling his hips into your core.

“What if it's important?” you mumble, your voice shaky when he relowers himself on you, kissing your lips softly. “Rin—” Your words keep getting swallowed by his lips and he doesn’t stop kissing you until you finally give in. 

He grabs onto your hand and lifts it, nestling it on top of his head and moves your fingers to play with his hair. You got the hint and began stroking his hair again, loving the way he hums into your mouth whenever you tug at his hair.

You were finally submitting to him again, his phone long forgotten in your mind and he grins before pulling away from the kiss to reattach his lips back onto your neck, adding more to the marks he left on your neck prior.

“Rin faster please,” you whine, trying to lift your hips to feel his cock deeper inside you but he’s quicker. A firm hand pressing down on your hips to keep them flat on the bed.

“Stop being so needy,” he says, voice muffled as he doesn’t stop sucking down your throat. 

“I’m needy? Says the one who’s been kissing me and having me play with your  hair for the last—” You grab your phone that was under his pillow and check the time. You got here around five p.m and it's now close to six. “—hour.”

“Were you not complaining you barely get aftercare during sex? All those other boys you were with practically discarded you, now I’m doing it and you have a problem?” His hand runs on the underside of your right breast before cupping it, squeezing it in his hand, enjoying the way you shiver momentarily. “Make up your fuckin’ mind.” 

His tongue licks at your nipple and your body jerks briefly before stilling as he sucks on your soft nipple till it hardens. 

“That’s—not the same and you know it, Rin.” you huff, unable to think of a comeback; not when he’s treating you like this.  He chuckles and bites gently on your breast.

All you can think of as you toss your head back is the feeling of his soft lips on your breast, his tongue licking at your nipple, sending static down your entire body. 

His mouth is hot against your skin and you find yourself subconsciously lifting your chest higher to feel more of his mouth. 

Your hands grab onto his face and lift him to look at you before pulling him towards you for a kiss. His hand rests on the headboard behind you as your needy mouth moves against his. 

You take the time to run your fingers along his sides, dragging them along his bare back that’s far too clean for your liking, not enough scratch marks like usual. If only he’d actually fuck you like you wanted.

This time, your phone starts to ring beside you and you pull away, breaking the kiss and completely missing the way Rindou rolls his eyes as you instantly go to answer it.

“Hello?”

Bored, Rindou bends back down to your neck only to have you press your spare hand against his mouth, looking sternly at him and shaking your head.

“Oh hi Kakucho. Yes, Rindou’s with me.” 

Rindou gives you a confused look and you shrug before listening intently at your phone. “Oh really? Yeah, we’re not busy right now. I’ll tell him. Okay, bye.” You hang up and put your phone back on the bed.

“Why did you lie?” Rindou asks.

“Kakucho said he needs you for something. I don’t know what, he won’t tell me.” 

“Okay? I’m still busy though.” He pins you back down to the bed when you go to sit up. “I’ll fuck you for real this time. Let me finish.” 

As if to prove his point he shifts backwards, grabbing your ankles and lifting your legs to rest on his shoulder. He leans forward and his cock instantly slides deeper than before; you moan loudly.

 “Right there?” He rolls his hips again, testing. You nod rapidly, breathless and that’s all he needs before snapping his hips recklessly. 

Your walls flutter around the condom with each thrust and he can’t get enough of how good you feel around him. He buries his head between your shoulder and his pillow and listens to your moans, how loud and shaky they get when his hips press firmly against yours. 

“I’m close,” you say softly, biting down on your lip.

“Me too. Shit.” 

His orgasm comes faster than he’d expected, his seed spilling out into the condom when you moan his name softly as your own walls spasm from your own orgasm. He lays on top of you momentarily before remembering Kakucho’s call and reluctantly lifts himself off you.

He slides off the bed and you lift your jelly legs up to sit upright, watching him change back into his clothes. 

“What time will you be back?” you ask, resting your chin on your arm perched on top of your knee. 

“Not sure to be honest. I don’t even know what these people want.” He fixes his belt. “Why? You’ll miss me?” he adds with a smirk and you roll your eyes,

“Other way around Rindou.”

“Mhm sure .” Fully dressed, he fixes his hair that’s been ruffled from earlier. “C’mere.” 

You slide off the bed and walk over to him. He cups your cheek and pulls you closer, gently kissing you. 

You pull away after a few moments and push him towards the door. “Get out already. Stop stalling and go see your friends.”

He laughs before closing the door.

He can’t keep his hands off you.

Rindou has his arm wrapped around your shoulder, keeping sure your body is pressed against his side the entire party. If you wanted to get a drink, he’ll be with you with his arm around your shoulder. It’s a friendly gesture, what can he say? 

 If you wanted to play beer pong with his friends, his arm is around your hip, standing behind you, close enough so that your ass constantly brushes his crotch whenever you make any sort of movement. 

His friends all look at him like he can’t be serious. Ran can’t even think of a time he’s seen you without Rindou’s arm around you honestly. It’s gotten that far.

If you’re sitting on the couch, Rindou’s arm is around your waist, making sure you’re sitting as close to him as possible. What can he say, he just wants to make space for others on the couch. He’s a generous guy.

You’re currently in the bathroom, fixing your hair up to get ready to step into the pool. 

Rindou’s watching you as he sits on the edge of the bathtub, shamelessly running his eyes along your body in your bathing suit. You’re not oblivious to his staring, only used to it at this point. It’s not like you don’t stare at him too whenever he’s shirtless. 

It’s only admiration .

Rindou stands up and stands behind you as you take your earrings out, his chest right against your back as you look at him through the mirror.

“You good?” you ask, concerned. He’s been silent the entire time you’ve been changing.

“Yeah. Why wouldn’t I be?” he murmurs, distracted by the thin strap of your bathing suit. He can’t help but wonder how something so thin can be sturdy enough to hold up in the waters. The last thing he wants is for it to come loose and have your entire chest exposed in front of all his friends.

“I dunno Rin. You’ve been really quiet since Sanzu mentioned swimming—”

“Isn’t this a little flimsy?” he cuts you off, ignoring you in favour of tugging at your strap.

“You think?” You tug at the other one and wonder. “I think it’ll be fine. Actually! Could you tighten the strings at the back?” You reach behind your back and gesture at it.

“Sure.” His voice is low as he unties the straps and begins tying them again but tighter. Halfway, he stops and you don’t notice until you’ve fully taken out your earrings, feeling your bikini top begin to slip. 

“Uh, Rin?” You feel him moving the straps off your shoulder but before you can question it, he’s turning you around and hoisting you up onto the bathroom counter. “Rin. What are you—”

He leans forward, entrapping in a kiss that has you shutting up instantly. His hand palms your breast through your bikini top that’s on the verge of falling to the floor. 

Your hands move to the side of his face and hold him close to you as he slips between your legs, his hand dropping to rest at your hips. His tongue plays with yours, licking into your mouth and you have to fight to keep the soft moan rising in your throat down as you ran your hands down the plane of his chest, gripping at the waistband of his shorts to tug him closer.

Your bikini top finally falls to the floor and it feels so good to have his hand caressing your bare breast. 

A loud knock at the door startles you; Rindou remains unfazed, only irritated at being interrupted. 

“What the fuck do you want?” Rindou yells at the door.

“We’re about to get in the pool. You guys coming or not?!” Sanzu yells back from the other end.

Rindou turns back to you and you shrug, not really minding what you do. His eyes drop down to your lips, your bare chest, your legs, then his dick that’s been hard in his shorts for the last five minutes.

“We’ll see you in a bit.” Rindou kisses you again, lifting you off the counter slightly to slide the rest of your bikini off.

“We’re busy right now.”

#—tr </3 #rindou haitani x reader #haitani rindou x reader #rindou smut #rindou x reader #tokrev x reader #tokrev #tokyorev x reader #tr smut #tr x reader #tokrev smut

[sh0tanzz]

Who do you think would be the mtl jealous bf in riize?

OMGG ive been waiting for an ask like this 😭

MTL JEALOUS BF IN RIIZE based on astrology ~

(reminder that this for fun and astrology is something I study for a hobby, these are all inferences based off of observations and not exact fact unless I knew them myself !!)

Most

Sungchan - Tbsh his jealousy would be pretty overboard and extremely obvious like a blaring red signal. He would NOT play about you. His cancer moon makes him pretty sensitive and obvious with his emotions so if he felt jealous he'd get in his feelings or even sulk/ruminate as well as he'd take it pretty personal and have a hard time letting go. His leo venus makes him pretty dramatic 😭. This venus paired with his moon might make him cause a scene or "act out" . His venus+moon leads to him wanting your care and attention on him and him alone. His cap mars screams possessiveness and being restrictive, he'd get so possessive do not let him see you laugh at another guys jokes or be helpful to another guy he'd be FUMING .

Wonbin - I honestly wasn't going to rank Wonbin this high but then I remembered his taurus mars paired with venus square pluto and pluto conjunct lilith so...here we are LMFAOO. From my own personal observations taurus mars is way more possessive in comparison to taurus venus; those pluto/venus/lilith aspects paired with his mars can make his jealousy take a snowball effect leading to an emotional avalanche. Plus a power imbalance fueling the jealousy even more and leading to him being restrictive. However, I ranked him below Sungchan because Sungchan would be VERY petty and loud about his jealousy while Wonbin would most likely silently seethe (due to his pisces sun, aquarius mercury) until he ultimately can't handle holding back, but until then his jealousy would still be DEEP.

Shotaro - His scorpio moon+capricorn venus makes him take the relationship pretty seriously. He craves stability and honesty and once he feels like his jealousy is compromising the security and trust in the relationship he must act ! He won't be too quick to jump into conclusions because of his libra mars, he'd probably think things through before asking/acting on his jealousy..and he might front and pretend he's only a tiny bit jealous/concerned when really it's weighing heavy on his heart in the beginning. When he is jealous he'd be more quiet and less jovial than he usually is. He'd be pretty straight up and might even just ask/tell you about how he's feeling. When things are clarified things will be cool again and he'll go back to being your sweet taro and hopefully stop staring daggers into the random guy talking to you while smiling.

Anton - Very unserious, would text "what position he got you in" and move on with his day. KIDDDING kind of 😭 He'd have short phases of possessiveness due to his taurus venus. His moon square saturn and venus square neptune can lead to slight paranoia and being unable to naturally express his insecurities which could be the source of the jealousy. Despite these things he wouldn't express his jealousy in toxic or overboard ways, he'd probably express his jealousy through jokes or non seriousness hoping you would pick up on it (you probably would with that mercury aries, straight to the point) If he ever did tell you straight up he wouldn't be too harsh he'd just want to be honest and being reassured will patch everything right up.

Sohee - I ranked Sohee this low because honestly when reading his chart I feel like his jealousy would, similarly to Anton's, be quick to come and go. He'd be quick to say something or show that he's uncomfortable. He wouldn't sit you down to have a serious convo about it, but it would have to just passively come out in conversation . As soon as he felt reassured then he'd be fine once again. Now if it was an ongoing issue of scenarios that led to him being jealous then he'd have a more serious even messy approach (his mars square pluto) his temper would awaken. But outside of that he trusts you, even if he doesn't trust and is suspicious of the guys around you he trusts YOUUU at the very end.

Seunghan - Oh the lovely boyfriend that just wants to keep the peace. He wouldn't want you to hound him out of jealousy so he ofc wouldn't do that to you either. If he was jealous he'd be more emotional rather than being petty+aggressive. His mercury is exalted in virgo so he'd definitely want to talk about it or at least let you know how he feels. Outside of that I think he'd want to avoid such a thing in the first place. He'd trust you as best as he can and wouldn't want there to be an imbalance in the relationship to where one of you are restricting the other due to deep seated jealousy (thanks to his libra sun+venus and sag moon). He quite literally just wants you two to be happy and knows that genuine jealousy can poison such a good thing.

Eunseok - I'm sorry fellow briize but this man is quite literally the least of your concern. His aries venus wouldn't want to make things too serious and ominous with jealousy (plus because he values his freedom so in his mind you must value yours too right ?) His sag mars paired with it means he doesn't want to dwell with thoughts of you possibly giving your attention to other guys. He basically has a nonchalant "she knows where home is" mentality lowkey. Plus if he ever did feel jealous he'd probably not say anything because his cap moon+pisces mercury would barely let him properly express it (with words at least). Also weirdly enough he'd be more jealous if you weren't in a relationship compared to if you guys were; once you two are officially together he wouldn't be as jealous anymore .

Least

#kpop astrology #riize #riize anton #riize fluff #riize reactions #riize imagines #riize smut #riize x reader #riize headcanons #riize headers #riize icons #riize masterlist #riize sungchan #riize shotaro #riize eunseok #riize wonbin #riize seunghan #riize sohee #riize angst #sungchan #riize astrology #eunseok #osaki shotaro #seunghan #riize is 7 #briize #anton lee #nct #nct u #riizenet

[awingedinsect]

-Flood me like Atlantic-

Chapter 8

Word count: 1.8k

Warnings: cursing, talks of injury, talks of homelessness, there’s a general 18+ content warning for this entire series and it does get a tiny bit interesting at the end here. Yearning Vessel gets his own warning.

“I got you a present.”

“Oh yeah? What is it?”

The little girl smiled, raking up a fistful of sand.

“It’s a surprise, silly.” She said. The breeze was blowing her hair, and Vessel smiled as she pulled it out of her sweet little eyes. “For your birthday.”

He remembers the smell of the ocean, the sound of the grey waves crashing on the shore. He remembers sitting there for hours with her, watching the tide come in as the sun made its journey behind the clouds.

He chuckled. “Aw heck, you didn’t have to do that.” There was a big smile creeping up on his face. “…Do I get a hint?”

“Well, mom paid for it, but I picked it out.” She said, yanking up a few pieces of grass poking through the grout. “and no.” She made a zipper across her mouth, beaming up at him with specks of sand scattered on her pink cheeks. “My lips are sealed!”

“Hey, Vessel.”

Vessel looks up from the pan he’s scrubbing, turning on the faucet to rid it of the suds. The water soaks into the cuffs of his hoodie.

“Hm?”

IV stands beside him casually, shrugging the leather jacket he performed in over his good shoulder.

“I’m heading into town. Anything I can get for you?”

Vessel sets the pan down on the drying rack, hands spidering a little desperately over the pile of dirty dishes in search of his next target. “Oh, no thanks,” he says, blinking at the guitarist’s reflection in the window then immediately looking down when his is in the pane too. He still looks tired, eyes bloodshot and hollow. Almost like he’d been nearly sacrificed and since possessed by an anonymous deity.

“You uh, driving?” He asks, glancing over at the man’s broken arm. An unprecedented wave of guilt comes over him, and he swipes his nose on his shoulder with a sniff. The sunlight is pouring in through the dusty window and it makes eye contact feel doubly impossible. But IV just shrugs, stuffing his hand in his jean pocket and shuffling a ring of keys.

“Aye, I’m the only one up here with a license. But I don’t mind, going to the grocery is pretty much a special interest at this point. You sure I can’t get you anything? Swing by your house for some clothes?”

It amuses Vessel that there’s an unspoken understanding that he’s staying. It would be sweet, if there wasn’t also the underlying idea that he doesn’t actually have a choice. But then again, he doesn’t have anywhere else that he should be, much less a house. He wonders if they can tell. If the inability to pay another night's rent at that damn motel is as plain as the bandage on his face. God, he wants his keyboard.

Out of anything in the world, he’d take those keys under his fingers.

“I’m fine, honestly. I can take a cab to the motel lat-“

“You’re staying in a motel?”

A horrendous blush creeps up his neck, and he dumps a plate on the rack hard enough to make him wince. “I’m… temporarily a bit displaced?”

There’s not a whole lot to read on IV’s face. He just absorbs information, then says some contemplated thing in return. But out of pity or surprise, there’s something closer to concern in his eyes.

“…You got a job, mate?”

There’s a silence longer than III’s fucking legs, and maybe twice as insufferable as the man himself. Even now Vessel can hear him in the next room, quietly muttering over his collection of herbs and spell-making equipment in an attempt to guard against whatever “bullshit the cat dragged in.” II is watching the tv, sipping a soda and giggling at whatever's on the discovery channel.

Vessel’s big eyes finally gather the strength to look up in the window, mouth twitching as he meets IV’s own.

“…I sing.”

And that’s what he does.

That’s how that day passes, and the next, and the next… at first, he’s nervous. Just settles on the edge of the couch to watch the three of them take positions, falling into the flow of practice as easy as a stream into the sea. II looks about as at home behind his drum set as a tree in the woods. Vessel has never seen so much cohesion between a person and their instrument, and it fills his gut with an almost jealousy, seeing something so flawless performed with such ease.

IV forgoes his guitar, obviously. But he still brings a lot to the performance by presence and a few vocals alone. II wasn’t kidding when he said the man could scream. The sound scratches Vessel's ears so gorgeously, he could legitimately start crying.

And then there’s III.

He stands front and center, that same flowery jacket on his shoulders. He looks concentrated. In tune. And yet there’s an ease that rolls off of him so fabulously it can’t help but feel like a subtle challenge.

Vessel watches his fingers move over the strings, rings glinting in the grey-ish light of the foggy forest.

And he feels… something.

He watches them play for an hour before II begs him to join. There’s something in those blue eyes that is undeniable, no matter how out of place he feels. And soon there is a mic stand in front of him, adjusted about three levels higher than he found it.

“Bring Me to Life.” III mutters. And without a piano, the first sounds are nothing but a few chords plucked by his nimble fingers.

The challenge is no longer subtle.

Vessel rocks on his heels, fingers splaying delicately down the side of the mic stand before gripping it low and still for his mouth to caress.

“How can you see into my eyes…”

A very quiet “oh hooo” of impending excitement comes from somewhere behind the drum set, and Vessel smiles.

“…like open doors?”

IV’s screams of “I can’t wake up” ring in all of their ears for several days, so intense it’d be funny if not so impressive. They played for hours that day, only pausing to brew a few cups of III’s jasmine rose tea. II was right; it tasted like ass. And yet in that room, sweaty from pouring his soul into a mic and surrounded by those three, passionate freaks of the industry, he realized he was almost happy. His smile, for the first time in years, wasn’t something he willed onto his face. And if he could hang on forever to the feeling of discovering a smile instead of creating it he would.

II tells him goodnight without any prompting. Just smiles at him, and says it as easy as breathing, before heading off into one of three doors lining the hallway.

IV likes him too. He gets a few changes of clothes and a brand new toothbrush from him, and even shares an intelligent conversation about guitars once Vessel mentions that he likes to play, too. Most of his feeling is in his eyes, he’s realized. They have a way of sparkling and harboring what might be big smiles in another case when he’s intrigued or at peace. The only person who gets him to really smile, is II; When the drummer is curled up in a tiny ball on the couch with his cup of “tea” or going absolutely manic on the drums, closing his eyes and getting carried off in the rhythm.

Even III smiles then.

But not once has he ever smiled at Vessel.

Vessel goes to sleep one night, thinking about it.

What would it feel like to have III’s approval? It’s clear at this point that he’ll never make the guy happy. He resents him too much for that. And yet, he did save his life. Shouldn’t that be good enough?

Vessel doesn’t like him very much, he’s decided. Especially when after belting his heart out at the man’s command he doesn’t even get a “well done”, or a “thank you” when Vessel made a mug of that nasty fucking tea and brought it to him after practice. He just nods his head and half-way looks at him; because at the end of the day, Vessel isn’t worth his attention.

And it makes his face red as a beet.

The moon is pouring in through the window. It’s been a week since it was full, and lighting up the forest outside with him in it. The cuts on his belly seem to be healing well, and he’s planning to take the bandage off his head tomorrow and see what the hell that’s all about.

Why won’t III approve of him?

He turns over on his back, looking up at the ceiling.

“You really are amazing.” II’s voice echoes in his head from earlier in the day, when he was cutting up some apples in the kitchen. “We’re all lucky bastards to have a singer like you messing around with us. Talk to III, we’ve got a gig coming up next week and I don’t know if we’d be half as good without ya!”

His eyes flutter as the darkness becomes staticy, rimmed on the left by faint moonlight and quiet as a grave with the whole house asleep. He thinks about II’s words. Is he in a band? If not, what’s he been doing up here all this time?

He’s not sure he can look at another crowd. Another waiting, patient collection of faces staring at his own until he does something impressive. Until the night goes on and terrible things have a chance to happen.

He shudders hard and closes his eyes, taking a deep breath.

Can he sing for people?

For me.

A voice speaks somewhere between his mind and his eyelids.

Sing for me.

“I can scream loud enough, for you.” His mouth wraps around the words, muttering them softly with hardly a sound. His tongue darts out on his lip.

He really does love singing with bass.

His hand slips under his hoodie, spreading delicately over the bandages decorating him. His fingers are cold against his hot skin, searing between the pieces of himself and what III taped to him. It doesn’t hurt so bad anymore.

His fingers travel down, grazing softly over the faintest of trails till they touch the band of III’s sweatpants.

God, he’s annoyed. He’s a good singer. Why isn’t he good enough for everyone? Why doesn’t that prick of a bassist say thank you when he makes him tea?

“I can scream loud enough...”

His fingertips push past the elastic, the slightest of tremors in his big hands for no reason he feels like guessing. He didn’t realize until right now how aroused he is by nothing in particular. It’s simply been too long, he thinks. Too long since he created release for all the sounds in his mind.

“…for you.”

For me.

“…Yes.”

After only a few minutes his eyes shoot wide open, full of pleading and hate as he cups a hand over his mouth and bites down hard enough to muffle a scream.

#vessel #vessel sleep token #sleep token art #sleep token fanfiction #sleep token iii

[robobee]

ur BRAIN w dark sarchensey(?) I always thought this esp with Henry but always thought it was too fucked up bc they’re NICE BOYS!!! but honestly blue ur better than me I couldn’t of gone on that road trip of two rich boys that have been traumatised beyond belief that ive only know for a year<3 Maura come get ur daughter rn pls

REALLL like WE know they're fine and I assume Maura+co. gave their psychic OK for it but like. NO WITNESSES GIRL??? NO PHONE SIGNALS??? UNTRACEABLE VEHICLE??? it is my deep rooted belief that all politician coded men are excellent at psychological manipulation too so you could not PAY me to do that imagine I get stockholmed 2 weeks in😭😭

this does remind me of one of my aus where henry inserts himself into the trip because he's also borderline psychic (if u interpret seondeoks line that way) + he was like OK Um. Getting some weird vibes from you post resurrection dude so I'm just gonna tag along lest your brain glitch out and you get possessed and try to kill that girl. and ganseys like if I WHAT. and henrys like don't worry about it ❤️

#ans #sarchengsey

[shion-yu]

False Alarm

Sometimes, it’s just not meant to be. An early Cliff and Theo/Al story, mostly fluffy banter and then some angst. 2,810 words, no TWs but CWs low intensity hospital setting, transplant talk, mention of internalized homophobia.

Cliff wasn't sure what to make of Theo, the lawyer he was doing his summer internship with before he started his first semester at NYU. When Cliff thought about what a lawyer should look like, he had certain expectations. A lawyer was extremely formal, never smiled or laughed, never asked questions, and always wore a suit. The only one of these qualities that Theo possessed was the suit wearing, and even then he could occasionally be caught wearing khakis and a button down. 

The craziest thing about Theo though, was that he was openly gay and no one seemed to care. It floored Cliff. His mom had always looked down on gay couples they saw in public. She looked down on everyone, but especially people who "chose" to stand out. Yet here Theo was, with a big office overlooking the financial district and an incredible case record under his belt and nobody ever seemed to disrespect him. He even had a picture of his partner on his desk where anybody could see, including the clients who came for consultations and business partners whose opinions really mattered. Cliff didn't understand how Theo got away with it, but he did. It definitely left an impression.

This particular day though, Theo seemed frazzled and distracted. Cliff was sitting across from him in Theo's office just having his weekly check-in with the lawyer. Theo usually seemed very put together and focused, but today he kept checking his personal cell phone on his desk like he was waiting for something. "So Cliff," Theo said, "Still think you'd like to go to law school after your first month here?"

"I think so," Cliff said. He tried not to watch as Theo glanced at his phone yet again. "I like the research. And I like going to court."

"You've certainly got the brains for it," Theo said. "When you're at NYU, take lots of diverse classes. Everything can always tie back into law and make you better at practicing it."

"Thanks," Cliff said.

"No problem," Theo said casually, but he was immediately distracted when his phone buzzed with a call. He looked at the caller ID and nearly jumped out of his seat. "Sorry Cliff, I've got to take this," Theo said hurriedly. "You're fine here, just, hey, pour yourself a coffee or something." Theo motioned to the full coffee pot on one of his other desks and then stopped paying attention to Cliff.

Cliff tried not to be nosy and listen, but it was hard not to when they were in the same room. He made himself a cup of coffee even though he preferred tea and sipped awkwardly. He hoped it gave the impression he wasn’t paying attention to the conversation Theo was having that clearly was not about work. "Are you sure that's all it is?” Theo was saying, his voice concerned. “Tomorrow? What time? Does he need to stay overnight? NPO after midnight? Okay. Yes, of course. Thank you Doctor."

Theo set his phone down, took a deep breath and then sat back in his office chair. "Sorry Cliff," he said. "You can come back now."

Cliff awkwardly returned to his seat a cross from Theo, placing the steaming cup of coffee on a coaster at the edge of Theo's desk. "That was my partner's doctor, I've been waiting for that call, sorry to be so distracted," Theo said. "He's going to the hospital for a minor procedure tomorrow, so I probably won't see you for the rest of the week." 

"Oh," Cliff said. What else was he supposed to say? "I hope he's okay."

"He's fine, thank you," Theo said. "He's got a port, I don't know if you're familiar, it's like an IV in his chest. Anyways, it got infected so they're replacing it with a new one." Cliff honestly had no idea what Theo was talking about, but it sounded serious. It seemed Cliff wasn't very good at hiding his expression, because Theo added, "He's got a disease called cystic fibrosis, so he's in and out of the hospital a lot. I don't want to say it's not a big deal, but well, it's not an emergency. Don't worry." 

"Okay," Cliff said. He nodded to the framed photo on Theo's desk. In it, a slightly younger Theo had one arm slung over the shoulders over a guy with curly dark hair, thick glasses and dimples. "That's him, right?"

"Yup," Theo confirmed. "His name's Al. He's a good guy." The way Theo was smiling as he said this was different from the way Theo usually smiled at everybody else. Cliff didn't know how to define it - fond, perhaps? "Next time he comes around I'll let you meet him. You'd like him." Now Theo had a weirdly knowing look on his face, as if he understood something Cliff didn't. 

"Sure," Cliff said. He was so confused. 

His confusion didn't abate even when he did meet Al about three weeks later. Al was shorter than Theo and wore very casual clothing that stuck out in the law firm. His cheeks were pink compared to the rest of his olive skin, which Cliff soon realized was from coughing. Al coughed the entire time he was in the office to drop off a lunch for Theo, and he dragged a metal cylinder on wheels behind him that connected to clear oxygen tubing in his nose. Cliff was startled; the oxygen hadn't been in the picture, nor had he expected Al to sound quite so sick. But everybody else in the office seemed to know Al well and think nothing of it. Al himself seemed energetic and cheerful, which was not how Cliff pictured somebody sick in his head.

Still, Cliff wasn't used to sick people, even if Al was apparently not contagious. He was sort of hoping Theo had forgotten about his promise to let him meet Al, but Cliff had no such luck. "Al, this is my intern, Cliff Barrows," Theo said as he led Al right to Cliff's desk.

Obviously unable to hide when his boss stood right in front of him, Cliff stood up and forced a polite smile. "Nice to meet you," Cliff said, sticking his hand out to shake.

"Nice to meet you too! I finally meet the famous Cliff," Al grinned, shaking Cliff's hand. His grip was firm and sure, not weak at all.

"Famous in a good way," Theo reassured Cliff. "I told him all about what a good kid you are."

"Uh, thanks," Cliff said, trying to keep a questioning tone from creeping into his voice. He felt awkward standing right there in front of the two of them under scrutiny. "Um... I'm just gonna get back to work then," he said, sitting at his desk and typing something nonsensical into an open word document until he was sure the pair was no longer looking at him. 

Cliff tried to look subtle as the two men walked away. Theo led Al towards his office with one hand around Al's back, Al coughing as they went, but he was also laughing. Cliff had no idea how he could seem so happy. Cliff had googled cystic fibrosis when Theo had mentioned it and it didn't really sound like a laughing matter to him. It sounded incurable and painful. Then again, Cliff supposed they couldn't be gloomy all the time. Or maybe even most of the time, since Al and Theo seemed to be normal unlike Cliff who could indeed go around with a perpetually serious look on his face. 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Al sat heavily in the chair on the client side of Theo's desk, coughing until Theo handed him a glass of water to sip on. "Thanks," he croaked, smiling up at his partner gratefully. 

Theo sat across the desk from Al in his chair. Although Al got to see Theo in his formal attire every day before and after work, seeing him wear it at work always felt different. Theo carried himself so confidentially and spoke with such a professional tone, it honestly made Al want to grab his tie and kiss him right there in the office. Theo's desk had definitely seen some action after hours before.

"Stop looking at me like that," Theo said, opening up the salad Al had brought him.

"Like what? I don't know what you're talking about," Al said innocently.

Theo mixed a packet of dressing up with his salad. "Like I'm a piece of meat."

"Aren't you?" 

Theo shook his head with a smirk. "You're so damn predictable," he said. "You keep your hands to yourself mister, I've got court later today. Thanks for the food." 

"You're welcome," Al said. "By the way, you were so right about that Cliff kid." 

"Right?" Theo said around a mouthful of lettuce. "He's definitely gay."

"So gay," Al agreed. "And adorably awkward.”

“He’s actually a better speaker than you might think,” Theo said thoughtfully. “When it comes to work stuff anyways,” he added, seeing Al’s incredulous look of doubt.

“He gave me the ‘wow, you must be dying’ look,” Al said. “You should probably tell him I’m fine. And that his face is an open book." 

Theo shrugged. “I don’t know how reassuring ‘My partner’s fine, just waiting for a double lung transplant’ is, but sure, I’ll tell him.”

Al rolled his eyes. “Thanks a lot,” he said sarcastically. “Anyways, I’m heading home. What do you want to eat tonight?” 

“Anything. Shake Shack. Anything."

"So... Shake Shack," Al said. 

"How did you know?" Theo grinned. "Okay, be careful on your way home baby. Wear your mask on the train."

"Ugh, Theo, it's July," Al whined, but Theo knew he would behave. Al was usually great about taking care of himself, but especially now when he couldn't risk any illnesses lest it ruin his chances of being on the transplant list. It was also why he tried not to leave the house much these days, but he'd had a doctors appointment a few blocks away so had taken the opportunity of already being out to visit Theo. 

Theo kissed Al goodbye and watched his partner walk down the street from the windows in his office, dragging the wheeled oxygen tank behind him. He shook his head, wishing Al would just take a cab, but Al hated wasting money if he could do it the cheaper way and Theo suspected it was far more about independence than cost at this point in their lives. 

They'd been together about five years now and had lived with each other since day one, having met as roommates. Theo had been in his last year of law school while Al was struggling after the death of his husband. At first they were just friends and that was enough. Right person, wrong time Theo thought, because it didn't seem like Al was ready for anything more. But then Al had gotten really sick and although he insisted Theo didn't need to worry about it, it was impossible. Theo spent every day studying at the hospital so that Al wouldn’t be alone until feelings became inevitable and Al made the first move. The rest was history. 

Theo smiled to himself thinking about Al, absently eating his salad until he was interrupted by his phone ringing. It was Al, which was odd because Al had only just left his office. "Babe? You okay?" Theo answered.

"Meet me at the hospital," Al said in a breathless rush. "I’ve got lungs."

Theo was speechless. This was the moment they'd dreamed of for months, and it was happening now. Right now. "Theo?" Theo realized he hadn’t said anything in response.

"Holy shit. Holy shit, I love you so much. Yeah, okay, I'm coming."

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

False alarms for this sort of thing should be illegal, Theo thought to himself angrily. The doctor had just left the room and explained he was so sorry, but the lungs weren't a perfect match after all. They were going to someone else - someone who wasn't Albert. Al had been congenial about it, nodding as if it didn't bother him. But Theo was livid and could barely contain his anger as the doctor closed the door. 

The silence in the room was heavy. Al had been changed into a gown, given CHG bath and gotten labs done, and had his port hooked up to fluids. He sat there in the hospital bed where they'd waited with excitement for the past two hours, now lost for words. 

"It's not fair," Theo said finally. His hands were balled into fists, which were shaking. "How can they do this?" Al was quiet. He looked out the window with a calmness that Theo didn't understand. "You're not mad?" 

"No," Al said softly. "I'm not mad. Can we go home though?" He was already going for his clothes, unbuttoning his gown. "Hey, if you hurry you can still make it to court this afternoon." 

Theo shook his head. "I don't care about court. I already told work I didn't know when I'd be back. They're going to be more surprised when I say nevermind." 

"Sorry," Al said, as if he’d ruined a casual date and not lost the opportunity of a lifetime after it was crudely dangled in front of him.

"Don't apologize," Theo said. "If anything, this place should be apologizing to you. How are you so calm?"

Al shrugged. "Someone else is getting lungs. Someone who needs them. I'm not going to be mad about that."

Theo sighed. "You're right, but I'm still pissed. Can I be pissed for you?"

Al seemed to consider it for several seconds and then nodded. "Yeah. You can be pissed for both of us, okay?" 

"I gotcha, baby," Theo said. He forced a tight smile at Al, who gave a tired smile back. 

Al was discharged and they arrived home around dinner time. Theo was starving, but Al said he didn't feel like eating. Theo didn’t feel like seeing anybody else for the rest of the day, even a delivery driver, and ended up throwing a frozen pizza in the oven. He called Al to the table when it was ready, hoping the smell would entice him. "You should eat just a little," Theo said. 

"I'm really not hungry," Al said quietly. "I just want to go to bed and have this day be over."

Theo felt a pang of pity and sighed. "I know. Just a few bites?"

Al finished half a slice and then shuffled off to bed. Theo ate the rest of the pizza alone, letting all the negative thoughts he was having get to him for just a few minutes. He chewed the pizza like it had personally done something offensive to him and then scrubbed the dishes clean, his stomach aching from eating too much. Then, he took a shower and forced himself to let all the tension leave him. He imagined it swirling down the drain with the soapy water, leaving him exhausted but calm. As upset as Theo was, Al was the one these things were happening to. He had to be strong for Al. 

Theo went to the bathroom, now in fresh pajamas and ready to be there for his partner. Al was lying on his side but not asleep and peeked over his shoulder at Theo. Theo sat next to him on bed and rested a hand on Al's arm. "Should we talk about it?" He asked.

"Nah. What is there to talk about?" Al said in his usual gentle tone. If Theo didn't know any better, he'd think Al didn't care, or was totally fine. But he also knew that wasn't possible and Al hid his feelings well. 

"What happened today was kind of crazy," Theo said carefully. "Crazy and honestly... not okay. It was like the biggest news of your life and then the biggest let down. It's a lot to take in."

Al sat up and looked at Theo. His green eyes were always so forbearing. "It is a lot," he said. "But ya know, I'm not as upset as I thought I'd be. Coz when I got the call, I didn't think, 'I'm going to live.' All I could think was, if I die, I'm not ready. So... Maybe today just wasn't the right time."

Theo hadn't expected Al to say anything like that. He swallowed down the lump that had risen in his throat and took Al's hands in his own. "You're right. It wasn't meant to be, and maybe it was for the better."

Al nodded in agreement, leaning forward to press his forehead against Theo's. "I love you, Theo," he said. "Thanks for being there for me." 

"I love you too," Theo said, taking Al’s hands in his own and squeezing them. "And next time you get the call, it's going to be the right match."

#shionwrites #still working on p3 of a safe place but here #here’s SOMETHING my brain let me have #and also it's always a good time for some cute al/Theo right? #plus it's sort of prequel-y #oc: albert #oc: theo #oc: cliff #whump #emotional whump #medical whump #oc sickfic #angst #hurt/comfort #sickfic #chronic illness whump #hospital setting #cystic fibrosis in fiction #illness whump

[transbeeduo]

i definitely agree that a lot of boobers are so fucking weird about them, there’s no argument there.

but specifically about the “replying to posts like theyre friends” thing, i feel like that’s just tumblr culture (for lack of a better term) honestly. responding to ppl’s posts like it’s a conversation has always been normal here in my experience.

i will say, i havent particularly seen those replies, so i dont know how far/bad they are when you refer to them, but just generally i think thats the least weird thing they do.

(i dont mean to sound like a “ive been in tumblr 50 years and this is just The Way 🤬” by the way, i mean this completely normally, im just bad at tone)

Hey!! I totally forgot to reply to this beforehand, major apologies. (I assume this is a response to this post? )

But yeah, I can definitely see that! I do know it’s part of Tumblr culture to respond to other people. But I feel an issue with how a lot of replies under Ranboo’s posts do it is that they either

A.) just be really weird (a lot of which are making jokes about Ranboo’s queerness or “joking” about them being transfem or fem-leaning, which they’ve never stated was a thing I’m pretty sure)

B.) Behave as though they’re friends with Ranboo, or refer to them with terms people would normally use to refer to close friends (I see people calling Ranboo a fag under HIS OWN POSTS. I know people call each other faggot in a positive/endearing way here, which is awesome! But like it’s still weird to do it to someone you don’t know, and don’t know is comfortable with the term I think.) People also tend to reply to serious posts in this way, which is fine for the most part, but I feel drifts into being more of a “we’re friends I’m comforting a friend.” Sort of thing occasionally.

All of this, combined with how Boobers also will hound Ranboo about shit on other social medias, (BooTWT is like. Weirdly possessive over Ranboo being their “ideal content creator” and whenever he does something that they don’t like they FREAK OUT. Either demanding an apologies or harassing other people. ConnorEatsPants being harassed about Genloss comes to mind, along with Boobers harassing Tommyinnit a lot of the time as well. And they’re just dicks to a lot of people in general.) people will somewhat mimic that behavior here, although seemingly to a lesser degree than Twitter. And while replying to posts is usually harmless, I feel like people just get too friendly or behave oddly to Ranboo, who’s someone they don’t know, and who doesn’t know THEM. It’s just a lot weirder than the average Tumblr account interaction I think. And while replying to them is fine!!! I have no issues with that (And I’m obviously not going to stop anyone or try to police how ppl interact with others) I just feel like people need to step back a bit and be like “I’m interacting with someone I am a stranger to.” rather than “I know a lot about this person. Therefore we are friends.”

#does this make sense??? idk im just kinda rambling #just treat ranboo as you would any other account really #discourse #crunch’s nibbles #ok 2 reblog btw

[angeliteonfridgeduty]

TIME TO ASK STUFF ABOUT 066

-if she ever went into the solver form (I think you said she did once? if i remember correctly), what did she think about this afterwards? And how did it feel at the moment of the solver form itself?

-from the time when we talked about 066 and Rinja, I remember that you mentioned that she would try to stop Rinja from overusing it. I. uh. wonder HOW would she try that fjdhdnhr ive been wondering about it ever since

-WHAT WOULD HAPPEN IF SHE ALSO SAW A PHYSICAL FORM OF THE SOLVER?? genuinely wondering. and what does the solver itself think of her

-is it fine that I ask so much stuff about the way she would interact with Rinja??? because I do have more of those. alright. what if she saw Rinja being possessed. like, with yellow eyes and all that. AND what if she saw them while they are JUST in their solver form. Not completely possessed just being completely out of control. ACTUALLY WHAT IF SHE ALSO KNEW THAT THEY TRY TO INDUCE THE SOLVER FORM ON PURPOSE SOMETIMES???

-Aaand lastly (for now) WHAT IF SHE WAS GETTING POSSESSED HERSELF TOO. LIKE. I know she tries to avoid using the solver at all costs but I dont think its possible to escape it completely. So what if she ALSO GETS TO THAT POINT

those are the ones I could think of for now!! yes they all also involve the solver WHOOPS FJHFJDHD

-Yep, she did in fact go into solver form precisely once. Funnily enough she actually did it on purpose, got mad at several scientists for reasons i did not think of yet and decided to cause severe problems for the sake of causing severe problems. (happened all the way back when planet core didn't explode and cfl was a functional shithole). Regretted it like hell afterwards as for how it felt, uh. the basic solver form feels packet ig

-I think she'd just. monitor rinja by directly being close to them at ~most times, and whenever rinja tries to do the do cynthia'd just go like "no. no we do not do that here. pls put the png down" while stopping their hand or smt (yk like uhh either v or n (i forgor) did with uzi like once in dead end. not the. not the chopping hand off but like that one that happens like way earlier. kinda like that yea) -If Cynthia ever saw the solver personification.. Her first instinct would be to hurl the heaviest nearby object on it immediately. 100%. I think AbsoluteSolver would personally find her and the fact it can't get her fully possessed for literal years at this point annoyiing as hell. legit in c262 the only reason it's really still bothering with her is because she's at cfl and it needs that place for whatever it is singularities are up to these days -tbh? she would get as possibly far away from a fully possessed rinja (or, honestly, any fully-possessed drone in general) as physically possible. While the png most likely definitely wants to keep all its hosts, 066 doesn't fucking know what goes on in the mind of that immature eldritch horror and definitely does not want to find out what getting sucked into a black hole feels like. As for Rinja just in solver form, i feel like 066 would try her best to get them back to their senses. And. if she knew RInja induces solver form on purpose occasionaly. i think she'd. sit down and attempt to convince them to stop doing that via talk. How well that would go? no clue. Would she do it? yup. -066 is fully aware that getting full-possessed by the eldritch png file is essentially inevitable, just trying her best to have that not happen for as long as possible. if she ever got to the 'start getting possessed ya dumbass' point, she would likely leave the settlement (yup she and the silly group she's accidentally collected over the years have a silly settlement of sorts down there), going somewhere that's far from other local drones to minimize any possible damage, do more stalling for idk how much time, and then.. eventually i think she'd. at the very least attempt to commit proper disposal of ai on herself (with someone else's help because. from what i remember that one isn't fully doable w/o someone else) so AbsoluteSolver doesn't get another free uber fully-controlled host. dark, yeah, but i can definitely see her doing that anyway. ye its perfectly fine that you ask a lot about cynthia/rinja interactions! i like thinking about those actually

#murder drones #murder drones oc #soup jar. that's it. that's all i'm willing to say #ask local soup idiot and local soup idiot shall answer

[stemmmm]

i got back from a week long trip so now i've had plenty of time to ruminate on things and im finally ready to see what the fuck this guy has been trying to cook

episode 7 post

ep1 ep2 ep3 ep4 ep5+6

i think i saw a drawing of this guy earlier today except he had boobs

so lion's pretty obviously supposed to be the baby from 19 years ago, right.

ay ay aY AY AY

oh bah, the way it started out as just the last word in caps for a couple lines made me think dlanor was disguised as shannon or something but nah shes just like a robot or possessed for something.

i feel like ive been told explicitly 15 times that beato was the original beatrice's daughter who kinzo believed was her reincarnated, as if this is the first time im being given this information

damn bro you look hideous

alright so we're positing that original beatrice was enough of a fascist that she stuck to mussolini even after the rest of the country gave up? ok.

alright alright alright we're talking about whether the axis were cowards based on whether or not they surrendered and how alright.

REALLY FUNNY FOR THE V/O TO STILL BE FULLY JAPANESE WHEN HE'S SUPPOSED TO BE SPEAKING ENGLISH. OH BUT "I CANNOT SPEAK ENGLISH" IS?

interesting that this beatrice is using the baby beato voice. I've been trying to get the logic of it, and the best I can figure is that its just... to differentiate? differentiate WHAT exactly, whether its between human beatrices or just the humans and the witch im not sure yet. but I miss her other voice :( the flashback we got of her earlier that I didn't mention also used this voice even though im fairly certain the original version didn't.

i get that its for plot contrivances because beatrice had to get here somehow but WHY on EARTH would someone bring their daughter on an armed military vessel in the middle of a massive war. also because i touched on it earlier i'd like to clarify, i get that the participants in war are not necessarily people who agree with any of it. and even then, your circumstances of birth and pressure from your family will put you in situations out of your control (given, thats what this whole thing has Been About). idk i dont want it to come across as i don't get what's going on or like im an idiot or something. i may also be a bit defensive because i haven't really enjoyed the reading process terribly much in a while and didn't appreciate some of the feedback i've gotten in regards to "just keep reading, you'll like it, youll understand" because i dont think its properly come across that i think i Do understand, im just squicked the fuck out by a lot of things in part 6 and so far haven't seen anything that would allegedly turn my opinion around that much. but there's still a lot left in this to go. im just. bored honestly.

REALLY funny how much "bice" comes off sounding like bitch. all my friends at home call me bitch

oh my god also hilarious. the golds in the submarine isnt it.

EVEN IF ITS A TOP SECRET BASE WHY THE FUCK DONT YOU HAVE A DOCTOR?

anybody else have to stop and hold their head for a minute every time wildly specific gun specs are listed for no reason whatsoever

anyways this fight over the gold is fun, i figured something was gonna have to happen that got everyone else off that island and left the gold, so this makes as much sense as anything. and feeling the drive to live despite it all after seeing genuine bloodshed for the first time is a little overdone but just fine.

*curb your enthusiasm theme starts playing* well at least he insisted on taking her to a doctor

ohhhhh we're confirming beato is really and for true kinzo's biological daughter *head in handssss*

PLEASE STOP PINCHING THIS MAN'S ASS!!!

oh my god, first acknowledgement that battler isn't here. i kinda figured since he's always been kinzo's mirror of sorts, he wasn't gonna be here because kinzo was alive. like there's no reason for that to be the case, but to me the logic felt sound. battler and kinzo haven't been in the same place at the same time, at least not in 1986. and it seems that will continue to be the case !!

STOP PINCHING EVERYONES ASSES

lion sucks, actually. wretched personality.

i was holding back on making a joke about how maria talks about beato the way christian billboards exclusively go on about how there's "evidence god exists" or whatever, but now she's reciting the bible word for word so i dont know what to do with my point but i have to share it now. i do like that her point seems to be that because maria doesn't have a father, she is jesus. good for you girl.

BEATOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. and with the voice! ok so definitely that's the witch's voice.

alright this whole scenario can be argued as maria having an imaginary friend about it but if that piece of candy that beato told her to keep as a souvenir and not eat is still in maria's bag, magic is fucking Real.

also beato telling maria to practice basic hygene as her witch traini-- *has a jimmy neutron style brain blast and remembers the 1 (one) shinto shrine i've visited* OH, NO THIS IS A SHINTO THING. OK HELL YEAH. more of beato the "western" witch using japanese magics. i see i see i see.

fellas i may just like witch beato

#m.txt #umineko liveblog

[quimbionics]

hellllo i would like to learn about iris ,,,, she seems very cool

OH MY GOD HI. HELLO. IVE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS

OK THERE IS SO. much. abt her that i don't think i can condense into a single post but here are the basics:

art credits : 1. 2. 3.

" Hey. I know this sounds sort of silly, but.. do you believe in fate? "

" Quiet, calculative, and pacifistic – Iris Williams can only be described as an exceptionally timid girl. Riddled with social anxiety and constant self-doubt, Iris shies away from all instances that involve human interaction, no matter how brief or inconsequential; instead, she is drawn to seclusion, preferring to keep to herself on most occasions as to not disrupt others with her awkward and, according to her – largely insignificant presence. She struggles to view herself as anything particularly valuable in comparison to others around her, having been used to being treated as a miniscule priority practically her entire life.

Despite her aversion to people, she possesses a particularly strange penchant for love – falling for nearly any individual that crosses her path. "

. ♡  .

on a surface level, she's your typical shy girl archetype! up there ^ is a slightly-edited excerpt from her personality doc, which is honestly sort of outdated but serves fine as a synopsis i think

she has a special connection to romance in particular, and not only is she obsessed with the romance genre, she's internalized so much of the idealized over the years that she falls in love easily as a result. as for her role in mighty med, she's essentially the third addition to the kaz & oliver duo – landing a job at the hospital not long after meeting them, as her instant infatuation for kaz and desire to share interests spurred her on to start reading comics.

i'm still working out when exactly she'd be introduced into the timeline, but my general idea for her is that she comes in around mid-s1 and starts a character arc mid-s2 that bleeds into elite force abt how meeting k&o basically changed her life! and speaking of elite force..

. ♡  .

art credits : @sketchycc

" From saving the people who save people to becoming the people who save people.. Never in a million years would I have thought I'd wind up here. I thought I could never hope to call myself a hero – but you.. you proved me wrong. Thank you, for everything. "

aside from the first half of season 1, iris was present for everything. which means, just like k&o, she obtained superpowers from the arcturion! her main ability is electrokinesis, but you can find a complete list of all of her current powers here.

. ♡  .

other miscellaneous trivia that i couldnt quite fit anywhere else are as follows:

adores cute things! she wears all kinds of cutesy pins on her doctor's coat that change every episode – sometimes they even foreshadow the episode itself, similar to leo's graphic tee's

collects all kinds of plushies. she has a mountain of them on her bed

dots her i's with hearts

has a v blatant heart motif in general

she's autistic, but is in huge denial abt it due to being undiagnosed and unknowingly masking her entire life. chase has ripped out an alarming amount of hair trying to explain this her

she loves sweaters – she's never seen without one, even in the warmer months. they're a huge comfort for her and the bulk of her paychecks go exclusively to her sweater collection

loves animals, especially cats

she has a diary. kaz goes through people's personal belongings. iris knows this. and so, in a brilliant move, she changes kaz's name to chaz whenever she writes about her crush on him, and for awhile it works – so well, in fact, that it backfires catastrophically when an actual chaz saunters into the hospital

her backstory doc + face claim are available here. all trigger warnings are labeled accordingly, but as the subject matter is rather heavy, i still advise you that you proceed with caution

#you have. no idea how long ive been waiting for someone on here to ask me about iris #she's my pride and joy. my greatest creation. my skrunkly blorbo i am SO in love w her #ty for indulging me... Finally #iris williams #mighty med #mighty med oc #lab rats elite force #lab rats elite force oc #asks

[warriorsfireandwater]

sorry if you posted about why, i couldnt find it! but why do you dislike brambleash? i don't like it either, but im curious to hear your opinion if you dont mind!

it's been a while since i've talked about this, but for me it's the very bad (as in low key homophobic) implications that come with it, moreso when people have things around it that keep canon very similar but just make it so ashfur wanted to be with brambleclaw. like ig there can be iterations of it that are less troubling but usually when I see it it's "ashfur is basically the same but slightly more sympathetic and just wanted to be with brambleclaw".

ashfur is a good *character* within warriors - we know his motives, he has a unique arc for the story, his impact and treatment of squirrelflight is unfortunately relatable despite being dramatized for the setting - lots of women have experience with jealous, possessive men, even those they never dated, who never let go of their obsession, who want to sabotage their other relationships, etc. as a PERSON he is not sympathetic, rational, or someone who's side you can really reason with, unless you're an actual abuse apologist/aren't willing to recognize the abusive and misogynistic nature of his behavior.

I honestly don't like any romanticizaton of ashfur ships. i think there are relationships that would be INTERESTING to explore as a narrative (Ive talked about LeafAsh before as a potential way of exploring how abuse would likely go underrecognized under canon society because of the laws preventing leafpool from having a relationship) but for me I find it deeply weird when people like, set aside or water down just how deeply misogynistic, abusive, possessive, jealous, etc he would be as a partner. people sometimes say he would probably be a fine partner for someone else/if brambleclaw wasn't around which is absolutely silly. no real life man who acts similarly has gone on to be an A+ partner. I can get into analysis of his character, speculation about his character, exploring AUs around him, but there's a certain point where people want to do away with any of the misogyny and abusive matte inherent to his personality to start making him fun, cute, and romantic.

if you're into brambleash as their canon selves but with just the feelings swapped, with canon choices still happening (particularly the fire scene) - you're left with a gay man who is possessive, predatory, antagonistic to his unrequited love's wife, attempting to murder their children (or just reveal their secrets if you're trying to make this scene more sympathetic), etc. A lot of these are straight up homophobic stereotypes (jealous, dangerous, predatory) playing out as a gay ship. If you want to explore abuse and unhealthy relationships from a gay lens, sure - but I don't think anyone who is keeping all of the canon scenes that make Ashfur, well, Ashfur, are doing anything beyond trying to keep him close to canon while making his abuse about gay jealousy.

also i find it just another playing out of fandom misogyny - ppl often play up squirrelflight's annoyingness, her betrayal of brambleclaw, etc to support ash/bramble ending up together. ashfur and squirrelflight's relationship is one that, purposefully or not, is a representation of real-world abuse and misogyny women experience (often from obsessed, jealous close friends, just like ashfur was) and stripping it of that context for one that has uncomfortable implications still put on gay men IRL.

[keepswingin]

No stress! Ive been in about a million new fandoms since we last caught up, do what you can but I honestly just wanted to tease you with that - that prompt is so random I can't believe that was something I requested back in the day 🤣 im doing good though, about to perform the biggest act of escapism this year and quit my job to travel for 6 months 😅 but otherwise nothing changes, how are you????.

Also also ive always wondered your thoughts on JATP being cancelled - when would you have wanted the storyline to go? To this day I cant rewatch cause it makes me sad it's not being continued 😭

Me: I can just do this in 200 words flat it'll be fine Me, last night, staring in disbelief at the doc: why is this 700 words and I didn't even get to the zeddison yet-

xD I'm taking some creative liberties with the prompt for both of our sakes, so hopefully it will be worth it when it gets finished!! Also? I'm so jealous??? Idk about anyone else, but I would love to just up and leave and see all of these places I'm missing out on, so that's super awesome that you're getting to do something so cool!! Stay safe and have fun and make that disappearing act work!! :) I'm doing alright myself, but nothing nearly as cool is going on in my life right now, lol.

Ah, jatp. It's still devastating that it was never picked up by a different streaming service either, it had so much potential, especially on the money side for business. As for where the plot could've gone? A sharp turn down angst alley, if you ask me.

Possessing someone to get to someone else? It could've gone so many different ways. The boys somehow disappearing again without a trace? Nick suddenly acting so different and pushy and leading to a climax where suddenly things are all too serious? Crazy potential, and I'm not even saying this as an angsty person, just for plot potential in general. Sometimes I really do question the decisions big companies make, especially when it's easy to get more money out of something, they're dumb.

#asks #honestly you saying 'i can't believe that prompt was something i requested back in the day' is the same vibes of me looking back #at old writing being like 'who let me write this' xD #like those old bullying prompts from ages ago whenever i randomly remember them i'm always like 'this went so dark and for what reason' #'should've just changed the prompt itself damn' lmao #also rip to linger but that was also a great idea roo came up with that was gonna be this whole ghost wars thing #really cool premise that i don't think will ever get fully fleshed out just like the show insert crying emoji hereee

[murdoc]

this is a weird post to make, but i dont really have many places to say it and i wanna share my thoughts Somewhere lol

so i found my dad after more than a decade of being out of contact with him (probably since 2010? at latest, very early 2011). or rather, after every few years of searching for a little while and coming up fruitless, he made a new facebook less than three weeks ago and i just happened to get Really lucky timing.

just before him i had also found my (former) step sister + mom, as well as my half sister (all sisters younger than me and previously i couldnt find), and.. its a strange experience to finally see people who used to be so close to you in your life show uo again, visibly older and doing their own thing.

its hard to explain.. its almost like youve woken up from a coma. you have memories and have had dreams of these people for years and years and during that time you never really realized that the image you have of them was one trapped in amber; even when youre cognizant of the passage of time, your mind just can't take into consideration the individualized process of aging, both physically and where the passage of time will take them and their relationships. you realize these people are now essentially strangers to you.

my (former) step mom has remarried again and has her own set of children (again), one of my step uncles ended up passing away, my step sister is no longer how i remembered her in 2007 from one of the few photos i have of her in my possession and is posting hippie white woman stuff on her feed, my half sister doesnt share my last name (paternal) anymore, nor her mother or new husband's, whom she is having a child with. i was able to figure out it was her because of the name and how she looks strikingly like her mom and has photos with my dad in them.

my dad himself has aged significantly since he's last shared a photo of himself anywhere. he used to always wear hats, but in a new photo he's got solid white hair despite being in his early 40s and is balding (HE did this to me..) and finally learned what glasses suit his face better LMAO. honestly, he looks better now than he ever did when i've seen him. which i think was one of the biggest shockers because god he looked so lame. this also gives me hope for myself B)

the thing i noticed the most though is how "normal" him and my half sisters turned out. granted, he was always so much more put together than my mother-- i'm sure thats why they didnt really like each other lmao. but, while im not sad about my life, even if it's definitely different than i assumed for my age, i can't help but wonder where i'd be if i had allowed myself to overcome the fear of my mother and went to go live with my dad like we had planned in 2008 or 2009.

however, just from how hard it has been to piece together the state of that side of my family, i don't think any speculation could even be remotely accurate. ive also never really been one to dwell on what could be anyway. at the end of the day i cant undo how horrific my childhood was, but i can make steps to grow from it and learn to love who i am and where i am now.. for how cheesy that sounds 😭

i am glad i finally got a bit of closure on this though. i knew my dad was still around somewhere, but not knowing anything beyond "he's alive" for so long left me with a lot of questions, now mostly answered. it's nice to know he seems to be doing good and that he's there for my younger sisters (not sure about my step sister, but i have an additional half sibling that i never met beyond a few times as a toddler and it seems she's fine too). i know that social media doesn't tell all and is usually finely curated to share the best moments, but i'm saying this in comparison to my mother who would never in a million years do what he seems to be doing.. down to having custody of his kids LMAO.

i don't think i'll ever reach out to any of them though. i know my dad still thinks of me once in a blue moon, as he's dedicated a birthday post to me some years ago on a now deleted profile, but if you can imagine.. i think my change in the last 13 years or so is a bit more drastic than just growing up. not to mention they have their own lives going on and it all seems just fine.

i guess if he ever does try to find me, he'll find out that my former step uncle (different one who is still alive) who teased him about only having girls was wrong LMAO. but i dont think he could ever find me unless he got in contact with my older sister who isn't doing too hot rn, or my mother.... and if it's my mom he goes through, i sure as hell hope he thinks finding his now son was worth it. i sure as hell wouldnt go through talking with my mom if i was him.

i dont think i ever made a post so long and detailed about my life on here??? if someone fsr actually read this... hi :) why did you do that? you are silly

#diary #very long and personal post. you can read it idc but its primarily about finding my father and there is a quick death mention Unrelated

[myownprivatcidaho]

oKAYYYYYYY ok. ok .

so that guy in my class this semester id been talking to. basically it was like a month ago we got carried away in his car after 8 days of talking and hanging out and basically after an hour of being in his car with the windows all fogged up he said he thinks i deserve honesty and doesnt want me to get hurt so he told me last semester there was a girl he liked who led him on and flirted and ended up having a boyfriend and he was still hung up on her and said he really just wanted to keep it casual and wasnt open to commitment and im REALLY really glad he was just honest with me. and we talked it out and he was really respectful and understanding when i (pretty adamantly at the time) said i just wanted to be friends and needed some space (like. JESUS he handled it so well im still kind of taken aback and honestly embarrased for ever having liked that ginger who led me on for a semester before going “oh yeah i hope i didnt like totally crush you with that or something” when i found out the ginger was seeing someone else lol, lmao). 

so the last month ive just been friends with this guy from my class and our friendship is really really good and we get along and hes super duper funny and i really appreciate and respect him and he respects me yk. 

but RECENTLY. so ive been giving him rides back to his place in my car bc  weve spent a few evenings studying in the library, and it kind of got to the point we’d study just long enough that his last bus would just ~happen~ to leave and i, being a helpful friend, would just ~happen~ to offer to drive him back to his place

and thats been all fine and good but last wednesday he told me he really appreciated the rides and about an octave higher than i thought i would i replied “yeahhhhh ofc :’3” and he said “you know thats the only reason i stayed at the library, to” then he sorta backed off and said “to. to take advantage of the free rides” and i was like “omg youre exploiting the free labor of women” but after he got out of my car i giggled on and off like a schoolgirl possessed the entire drive back to my place. i kinda feel like hes testing the waters to see if im open to this conversation coming back up. which i AM ftr. a month ago we both didnt have those sort of feelings for each other but atp i thiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiink im rlly starting to fall for him and hes really looking at me with this Glow in his eyes and its driving me nuts.not to mention the good morning texts every morning jesus CHRIST

ANYWAYS so here we are again at the library this evening and jesus CHRIST hes wearing this funky patterned button up and when he walked into class today my first thought was jesus christ i WANT him. and within the next hour we’re gonna go back to my car so i can give him a ride back and ive just perchance parked a couple blocks further down so that i get to spend more time walking and talking with him because its honestly my favorite part of the day. anyways. hes sitting across from me and i feel like the ice is really melted between us again and im ovulating and shoot me i WANT him and i think we’re on the same page.

#he looks good. he looks REALLLLLLLY realllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllly good. #hungry eyeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeees #crushposting

[x-eins]

filling out the ask game

cuz i feel like it. source

📷 What’s set as your phone’s lockscreen?

fanart of Dottore hugging his own animal version

🍫 Cheese or chocolate?

depends on the cheese, depends on the chocolate. white bubble hocolate trumps all cheese but gouda cheese trumps dark chocolate.

✨ Do you have any nicknames?

sooo many lol: Nate, Neo, Shir, Fox... all my names are nicknames honestly

🎵 Last song you listened to?

Kyoto by Phoebe Bridgers!

✏️ Have you ever written fanfiction?

yes! very rarely though

😏 Are you on discord?

yeah but i barely use it

 💛 Do you have any piercings?

no, i wish

🐰 What do you think says the most about a person?

how they react when they're angry at their friends. if you're the type to freak out and block someone, insult them in public and drag their name through the mud for anything that upsets you no matter how small and no matter how long the friendship has lasted then you're likely to do that to anyone else and i don't trust you. (<im counting myself among the people who have done this in the past btw but i've worked hard to rectify my behavior)

🍪 If you were a cookie, what kind would you be?

i don't know!!! hopefully a lemon shortbread cookie....

🐶 Are you more of a dog person or a cat person?

i think i'm more of a dog person because i understand dog behaviors better! but equal.

🎧 Headphones or earbuds?

both is fine!

🌼 What’s the last thing you said out loud?

me to my bf "do you think i know any weird facts?" LMAOOO re: the next question

🙃 What’s a weird fact that you know?

cucumbers are a fruit!!!

🦉 Are you a morning person or a night owl?

a night owl for sure

🧸 Favorite place to nap?

in my bed BUT i used to love napping in the breakroom at work under my coat... best sleep ive ever had fr

🏳️‍🌈 Are you a member of the LGBTQIA+ community?

i sure am

🦋 Describe yourself in three words.

creative, loud, temperamental

👖 Jeans or sweatpants?

sweats all the way

🥤 What’s your go-to Starbucks order?

white chocolate frappuccino with lactose-free milk and whipper cream. i also really like other fraps with no coffee!

🧡 A color you can’t stand?

most shades of purple lol and any muddy colors

💎 What’s your most prized possession?

i have manyyyy but, some letters from fav authors and my fav mangaka are up there!!! and a book of calligraphy that my fiance made me.

☕ Coffee or tea?

teaaaa

🦖 Favorite extinct animal?

Parasaurolophus !!!!! the interpretations of them look sooo cute

🌙 How long have you been on tumblr?

over 15 years i think

🌴 Desert island item?

phone with internet connection. im getting rescued!!!!!! or working angel wings for the same reason

🐸 Describe your aesthetic.

neon pink, cute, short shorts, summery (although i hate summer!), lots of bright colors, neon city lights, walks through the city at night, a snowstorm in the city, angels, angel wings, foxes..

🔮 What’s your dream job?

making money off my writing

💙 Relationship status?

engaged!!

🌿 Describe your favorite outfit.

i have photos!

🎤 Is there a song you know all the lyrics to?

there's no song i can just start singing out of nowhere but i know all the words to 111 Winchester by I The Mighty and Snow by Ricky Montgomery

🤎 What color is your hair?

dark brown/auburn

💌 Do you talk to yourself?

yep

💄 Do you wear makeup?

nope

🌸 Best compliment you ever received?

any compliment that's about my writing!

#abt me

[sagemoderocklee]

do you think any naruto characters would have allergies to any foods? i have so many family and friends with food allergies but almost no tv shows or stories have characters like that.

anon you have come to the right person because i have food allergies and i treat lee's reaction to alcohol as a food allergy! im allergic to alcohol when ingested as a drink but if it's cooked into foods i am typically fine--which is fine cause i was never much of a drink anyways. im also allergic to wheat and soy, and am currently struggling to figure out if--thanks to long covid--ive developed an allergy to some fish or if its something else as ive been having reactions to some things but it's not consistent

i have two fics where lee's alcohol allergy is featured--Plus One and RtS--and the reactions he has to it are just pulled from my own experiences.

i haven't thought about this for other characters per say, but one thing im sort of vaguely aware of is that allergies are more prominent in america/the states because of the way our food is processed. there's an article i read recently about gluten intolerant folks in the states not reacting/having such mild reactions to bread made in europe just because of the processing of grain there vs the states. i did not try this out when i was in ireland because i was 1. anxious and 2. didn't want it to actually work and then come back to the states and not be able to have bread

anyways you didn't ask me about MY medical/food history, im just rambling, but the reason i bring this up is i guess i wonder how common food allergies would be. obviously dangerous allergies that result in anaphylaxis aren't going to be eliminated just because of how food is processed so it's very possible that other naruto characters could have or develop allergies.

sometimes allergies develop because you eat soooo much of something, so maybe like naruto develops an allergy to something in ramen lmao

i def think the only time i do see food allergies in media is when it's being used as a contrivance to create a situation where a character almost dies because of food--sometimes it's done for comedy, sometimes it's used in a more series fashion, but i think i really have only ever seen it used in that context (recently watched My Best Friend's Exorcist which was... a film. honestly disappointing but i hear the book is very good. but the point is there was a nut allergy in that and it was, again, presented early on so that down the road when one of the characters was possessed she could essentially poison the person with teh allergy)

it would be really nice to see media shift and acknowledge the seriousness of food allergies outside of as a plot device. it would be like cool to see something where it showcases that food allergies are a disability and can make you feel very isolated. like your friends all go out to eat but you cant join them--ive had situations where ppl have picked a place for a con tradition and been like 'oh sorry i guess you can just sit there' and i think ppl don't realize just how shitty that is!

anyways rambling again! sorry anon! thank you for the question!

#having food allergies is truly so tragic #i would feel bad if naruto developed an allergy to something in ramen #like what a betrayal