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#ive been on this site for years so i get to reuse Joaks
secretmellowblog · 3 years
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I know I’ve said it before but really, the Hobbit is nothing but a Heist Story where the twist is that they're stealing from a dragon! It's literally Ocean's 11 but it's Thorin's 14!
The story is about a sheltered fussy gay old bachelor learning to become a master Burglar! There's a sequence where the protagonists all get sent to fantasy-prison by the elf-cops and Bilbo has to break them out! This is why the Hobbit is such a good children’s book. because it's about how crime is fun and the best way to get out of your comfort zone and make friends is by pulling wacky heists!
I think my favorite moments in the Hobbit are the ones where Burglarly is described in the way authors would usually describe Knighthood: in glowing terms, as an honorable profession with a deeply respectable history. Being good at Breaking the Law and Thieving is something worthy of accolades and praise (as long as you’re stealing for Honorable reasons). I love things like, the moment where the Elf-King wishes Bilbo a good day with the line:
"May your shadow never grow less (or stealing would be too easy).”
Tolkien understood that epic fantasy stories are the best when they’re actually heist stories in disguise!
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