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#its wild seeing traits i have in people around me
kalfui · 1 month
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been thinking about aroace alastor a lot, in the sense that ofc this is simply canon and i wouldnt even BE thinking about it beyond a simple "woohoo this is fun, let's think about how that might have affected him and his relationships both whilst alive and after his death and fic and art and the usual joy of character analysis" if it weren't for the fact that it seems to be a flipping fight to just. Have that canon be acknowledged, which is taking up so much energy that it's honestly hard for me to enjoy him as much as I wish, considering this rep is supposed to be For people like me
and I think that's so much of my frustration around all of this, which IS mitigated by just finding a few chill people to follow and focusing on that -- but even then most of my "suggested for you" for this show is alastor x [insert any random main character] shipping/sexual content -- is that this is an offering for people to learn something new and delve into experiences that they may not have thought much about and the ones who know what aroace means, and in particular within the realms of how this character is being written within this particular very-sex-heavy universe (so, not so different from real life), by and large decided to just go "nah." people aren't interested in aroace experiences, and it's weird from a "so you just don't like a large part of this character's canon traits then, do you like the actual character, or just the OC you've made up in your head that happens to look like them?" perspective, but mostly for me it's that a lot of the way people talk/write about this it's like aroaceness is something that needs to be Fixed Somehow, and thank Goodness there's a neat little loophole that we can utilise in the form of "well sooooome aroace people do want to have sex and be in a relationship"
so many of the things I can't help but see, block, move on from, and in the ao3 alastor tag (which, it's frankly wild to me that aroace alastor has to be a specific tag, because so much of it ISN'T that, and even then we have to sift) is either just the equivalent of going "lalalala if I don't think about the aroaceness it's not real" or the even more disturbing "now how do we fix this so that the ace character can still fuck somehow." it's really creepy, and very much how people talk about aspec people irl. it's just incredibly poor taste and shows that this community is still so invisible
people really ought to think more about why this is such an important hill for them to die on that they want to Fix aroaceness in one of the only genre-fiction characters to be canonically such, ON a show where every other character enthusiastically enjoys sex and most of them are in established relationships or various slowburns -- why is the character that is not interested the one that is shipped with every other character to such an extreme?
I feel like anyone writing an aroace alastor that mysteriously can be compelled into sex and a romantic relationship needs to give me a 3000 page essay on the history and philosophy of aspec identities with a special section on aroace representation in media
but ultimately it's just a "look. please be kinder. if you look in our sandbox we have barely any toys, why are you coming into this sandbox to take more of them and then rubbing our faces in it and THEN being rude to aspec people when we say it makes many of us uncomfortable to be sidelined like this?"
I keep thinking of that one screenshot that was going around tumblr of the person who wrote straight brokeback mountain fic that everyone was going WTF about. why is it alright to "headcanon" away canon aroaceness (and mock people who point out its canonicity), but it's largely agreed to be in poor taste to do so with other canonically established queer identities?
I get fandom's not activism, but it sure sometimes can be a yardstick for how much I'd trust people to respect me irl, when I cannot enjoy aroace escapism without being talked over/mocked/yelled at AND having aspec theories appropriated without any understanding of what they actually mean or how they apply -- this history and community is a part of my life, and it's like people are just traipsing mud through it with the lack of respect for it (as lucifer would say "you come into MY house bitch???")
(apologies this got long. you don't have to post if you don't want to, I get that it could be inflammatory and don't want to put that on you, I've just been needing to vent. I just feel like I'm going a bit crazy with how nigh-impossible it is to avoid this -- why am I the one who's having to make all that extra effort to enjoy a character written with my community in mind? don't y'all have enough toys???)
Don't apologize, I absolutely love reading how others feel about this situation, and I completely agree.
I think it's sad how people don't want to think about a characters aroaceness and how it affects them and instead just throw that part of them out of the window. I think it's even more interesting since Alastor canonically thinks that he's straight, but hasn't found the right one yet.
"Headcanoning" a canonically aroace character a different sexuality is so.. I don't even have a word it. Many people "headcanon" Alastor a different sexuality, but keep it canon when it's Angel Dust or Vaggie. Personally, I think it stems from aphobia. Just like you mentioned, people feel the need to "fix" aroace characters, like their sexuality is a messed up or broken part of them. It reminds me of when I used to hear teachers talk about how everyone will someday find love, and the ones who don't will have a huge gap in their heart and be empty. It's quite terrifying just how similar it is. The fact that he, as the only confirmed aroace character, is shipped the most, too, is quite saddening.
It's disturbing how they search and search for stuff to use as excuses when they ship aroace characters. "Aroace people can still date," "It's just headcanons," "Alastor is not canonically aro," and so on.
Ao3 scares me, especially with characters like Alastor. You don't even wanna know how many times I've seen people say, "I know Alastor is aroace, but we'll just ignore that" in fics. Most of the time, they even change his character completely, and he's so out of character.
It also kinda disgusts me with the stuff people say about Alastor, I can be scrolling on Tumblr and a post comes up saying how Alastor would fuck the living shit out of you and it's so fucking disturbing and graphic, I guess this is just how it is generally when people talk about fan favorite characters, but when it's an aroace character too, like.. no, he wouldn't do any of that.. It's so weird. This is what people care about, sexualizing. They don't even seem to care how much of a complex character he actually is, but only how he would be during sex, and it's quite disturbing that most of the time he is the victim to these type of comments.
And, with the amount of hate I've gotten from tiktokers in my comment replies saying how either Alastor isn't aro, how he's just fictional and it's not erasing any representation by shipping him, how aroace people can still date, how Viv allowed them to ship him, and even saying that it's okay to ship him because he's a stereotype and bad rep (???) and whatever else they have to say, I quite literally do not care. I'm not gonna be humiliated into silence, I'm not ashamed about the fact I'm trying to keep these crumbs of representation we have left. "Boohoo, you talk too much about Alastor being aroace," and I'll continue, I think that's a lovely and very interesting part about his character, especially from the time period is from, and the fact he's unaware too.
it's kinda sad how a lot of people don't even know that he's aro, I wouldn't either since all the fandom does with him is ship him. There are so many other relationships people could dive into, Husk and Angel Dust, Charlie and Vaggie, Vox and Valentino, and many more, but yet they go for the aroace character.. Also the fact that since the pilot the character he's mostly been shipped with is Angel, a character who makes a lot of sexual remarks towards Alastor which he very obviously feels repulsed and disgusted by, is kinda just.. where's the appeal when he's clearly disgusted? Is that part of it? I'm glad that there is a side of this fandom where people actually love him for his character and not just because he's attractive.
Other than that, I'm very glad the show itself knows how to show he can have meaningful friendships and platonic relationships with people, such as Rosie, and didn't make him an edgelord that hates everyone and doesn't have friends for some random reason.
Thanks so much for sharing your thoughts with me, I enjoyed reading through it, and again, I completely agree. I just hope the fandom could realize he's a lovely character and that him being aroace is just a part of him like it is of us.
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stressedbisexualtm · 7 months
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[< - LOTS OF WORDS - >]
trafficblr, hear me out on this:
We've all seen the idea that the life series are seasons, right? I normally see it like this: third life - winter, last life - spring, double life - summer, limited life - fall/autumn. But I think of it more like this: third life - fall, last life - winter, double life - spring, limited life - summer. Listen:
I think it would be more interesting (and true to the series) if third life was fall. The main reason people say third life is winter is of course because of the "RED WINTER IS COMING!" line, but the truth is, red winter was on its way. Red winter was coming, but first comes fall. People are more tight-knit in third life, always staying true to their real, solid, established alliance, and we see this all the way until the end of the series. It reminds me of fall, but I can't explain how. I feel like the visuals of the season match up, with the lighter greens and browns that cover most of the server, the stone of the Crastle and Dogwarts, and the tans and yellows of the desert. People are getting nervous, scared, and towards the end, more bloodthirsty than before. As the final battle of dogwarts begins, you can see the first snows of a very, very painful winter. Grian, being the winner, shares some of these traits. He's quick to judge and slow to make allies, unsure of who might betray who next. He does keep his closest ally with him until the very end, where they decide theyre going to win together no matter what. Grian, at the end, is tired of the nervousness and painful loyalty that comes with autumn. He is ready for winter to begin.
And so we move on to last life. Here, at last, is our red winter. Death is rampant and vicious here, our first red name appearing in only episode 2. Everyone is cold this season- when you're red, you're out. There are no true alliances or friends, though people tend to fall into patterns when they need to. The reds are much more bloodthirsty this season, being unable to contain themselves around anyone else (though we see our one or two exceptions). So by the time the canary falls, this season's fate is sealed in a bloodbath. No one who has made it this far is arguing that winter this year is red. This season was much more muted visually, the world being covered in dark greens, browns, and greys, as well as the snow covering a decent portion of the map (again, playing into the winter theme). Scott started the series warm, and while he never did get that bitter edge winter has, he was certainly ready to grow outward again into spring.
Double life. A brand new season, full of hope and expectancy, though that fades as time goes on (like things that only bloom in spring). It's new, it's exciting, and for some, it's full of love (as spring is typically seen). Things get intense, but there's always this air of excited mystery. Everyone has played at least one game before, so they know what to expect. Or they think they do, because at every turn there is something new. Secret soulmates? Why not! Leaving your soulmate and choosing someone else? Wonderful! FISHING A WARDEN TO DEATH?! Well, anything for the content.... Pearl, to me, also fits her season. She starts out excited to meet her soulmate, albeit a bit nervous, but she's turned away almost immediately. And, well, who could blame her if she cried? (After all, 'april showers bring may flowers', or whatever it was) She picks herself back up (a plant budding after its flower falls off) and makes it alone. She makes it to summer. And if, in the end, she learned how to plant her seeds, who was going to stop her?
And, well, limited life. Alliances, while having establishing members, are flimsy and easily remade. Everyone is wild, and spontaneous, and most people aren't really gunning to win anymore. There are go-getters, and nobody likes losing (they'd like winning even less..), but no one is playing as seriously as they were before. Everyone has played at least 2 games by now, most have played 3, and this time around dying doesn't even cost you a whole life! It only costs you 30 minutes, which out of 24 hours? Basically nothing until you hit red. Alliances shift with the wind, and not everyone is quite playing by the rules. In the end, Martyn wins. Martyn is... a wild card. He could be like summer, if he wanted to. He could be like spring, or fall, or winter. He's a traveler, a shifter, a knight, anything he needs to be. And if that doesn't go with the fluidity and changeability of this season, then I don't know who else could have won.
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comicalfont · 1 month
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Undertale is for Everyone
Happy Valentine's Day! Yesterday marked five years since the day I first started playing Undertale. It's led me to dwell on what exactly I would say the game has meant to me, with how loaded a question that is. There's so much I owe to Undertale, and the joy it's brought me is something everyone is as deserving to be a part of. Despite some recent fandom events, all members of the fandom need to know that the game celebrates and welcomes them with open arms, which I'll get to more in a bit.
I first played Undertale at a period in my life with a lot of unanswered questions, both for present me and future me. I'd managed to not give it a try in the first few years it was around, but after running into enough Deltarune fan content in the wild when it came out, I played Chapter 1 and loved every bit of the atmosphere and characters, and I wanted to play Undertale right after. After accidentally killing Toriel and starting over, I was immediately drawn into the story it told and the friendships I was making. My appreciation of Sans was there from the start, and here I am, many reader fics with him later, and the rest of the main gang felt like buds I'd been hoping to meet some day. Even the minor characters meant so much to the journey, and by the time it was done and I'd seen what Frisk/the player's kindness and want for peace can do, I was completely hooked and the game rented a free condo in my brain.
What I wasn't expecting was the other ways Undertale's touched my life. I'm trans, and before I'd played, it had only really been associated with discomfort and a wish for things to be better, without much of a light at the end of the tunnel to look at. Undertale's queer-friendly themes and the characters' insistence on being themselves opened me up to thinking about a future where my own kindness and, well, determination can lead me to being the true me. While my trans story was far from done, it helped me see the future as something I can smile about, rather than needing to be afraid. The fics that I've written about Undertale, and especially the bone-friend, since I played have also led me to meet the people I consider my closest friends, as well as being a gateway to other fandoms that have captured my interest. These connections I've made through the game are ones I'll carry with me for the rest of my life.
So, where am I going with all this? Undertale has invited me into a better path than the one I'd been taking, and that's an opportunity I'll forever be grateful for. Unfortunately, there are some in the fandom space who have shared hateful views about people simply for who they are, and everyone should know how far those views are from the truth. Undertale is a game about love and growth, and it is the responsibility of those who participate in its community to follow its footsteps and celebrate everyone for their traits; not just tolerate, but celebrate. For fellow trans people in particular, I've been thinking about this the most; you are real men, real women, and real non-binary identities, and all of those things are represented in Undertale itself. Celebrating trans lives isn't just the right thing to do, it's a part of this wonderful game we're all enjoying together.
Maybe this reaches just two people, or twenty, or more if I'm lucky, but whoever does read this far, thank you for taking the time to see how much Undertale has meant to me over these five years, and I hope you know how much you mean to the community. We're all making it a better place by being ourselves, and I hope the game keeps lifting people up for many years to come. Now, go read that new volume of the Undertale/Deltarune Newsletter!
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evablueblanket · 1 month
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Will you tell me about an LU character you love and why you love them? Please please please ramble on and on! It's my favorite! I get so many fun ideas when people gush about their favorites.
I (think) I've said this before, but I am not the most analytical/observ person ever so most of what I say is probably kinda shallow :') BUT THIS IS MY RAMBLE SO OH WELL
Okay so recently, I've been on a Warriors kick. I just super love how like, everyone portrays him! Most see him as big brother shaped, which I super love. His background is just so vastly different than every other Link, which serves as a very cool contrast imo
The way @somer-writes makes Twi and Wars idiodic brothers is like, my favorite ever. I love love love LOVE how he writes Wars and Twi it's so insane the comedy that unfolds when they're just messing around xD
Warriors has this air, this *vibe* which I'm just super drawn too, I think it's just how my personality vs his works (you could theoretically draw *some* parallels with Sokka from ATLA, at least the way they each hold themselves I'd say. Also big bro stuff) (ALSO how both of them are portrayed as 'smart', which is a trait I typically relate too in characters)
When I like a character though, it's more based on the different types of relationships everyone writes them as though, I'd say. Wars and Time and Wind have this super intriguing bond that I think is cool to see how everyone interprets it! For the most part people write them as they're all aware of the War of Ages and whatnot, which lead to some nice fluff and/or angst. But when there's some time paradoxes, it makes it every so more tragic and it's really interesting to see how that can get written. I recall a fic (I FORGOT THE TITLE AND THE AUTHOR NOO) where Wars was teaching Wind medic stuff, but it was like a year before Wind meets Wars in the war. So Wars is all "sob this is why Wind is such a good medic? *Bc I taught him?*" THIS IS SO COOL AND INTERESTING
Also when there's War of Ages fics that have Time/Mask being a stupid child (/aff) they're just super hilarious. There's a series out there that has the Fierce Deity (sorry forgot the author again xD) act as Wars parent figure/older brother figure and it's just really funny to me bc ofc Wars would be a stupid overworking idiot. Loser smh
Four is also another one of the sillies that live in my brain, and I kinda wish there were more fics on how they interact. Though, if I'm being real idk how they really would cause they don't really have the same synergy as any other Links. I just like my favorites to interact, but I super understand how they wouldn't ^^
Small side bit on serious Wars (the biggest example is "Call Them Brothers" by wutheringmights which I'm almost 100% certain you've read that already cause it's soooo long and it's SO GOOD AHH) and ugh I wish I could pay attention more to get every complexity that this Wars has but the brain kinda hates me. I think it makes a lot of sense for Wars to have a grittier characterization, war does that to people. The entire fic is so visceral to me, I just vividly remember reading the flashback section about the long winter, and I don't even know how to really describe it xD
Wars has such a broad range of emotion, if one were to put him under and microscope and study him there would be SO MUCH.
HAVE I TALKED ABOUT THE AESTHETIC
HES THE FUCKING PRETTY BOY OF THE GROUP AND THAT'S SO VALUBLE TO ME FOR NO REAL REASON
Ik Wild is seen as the one with like, outfits and Legend has his jewlery, BUT WARS HAS HIS FUCKING SCARF. THERES SO MANY POSTS ABOUT WARS AND HIS EMOTIONAL SUPPORT SCARF AND I AM SO FUCKING FOR IT YOU HAVE NO IDEA
THE SHADE OF BLUE IS AWESOME, ITS SO COOL, ITS SO COOL HES SO COOL RAHHHH
*oops tehe I rambled like a lot* ty for this opportunity :D I'm super glad I decided to type this on my laptop and not my phone xD
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pokemoncenter · 1 year
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On bonding with Dragon-types as a non-specialist
(The following is a transcription of my Tuesday lecture at the Dragon Conference:)
Dragon-type Pokemon are one of the most vague and misunderstood types in existence. So far, rather than abilities, the Dragon-typing generally refers to physical characteristics, temperament, and predation, along with a weakness to cold, as though they are cold-blooded.
What this means is that Dragon-type Pokemon actually have very few traits in common with each other, and thus there is little that can be done to have a foolproof way of bonding with all of them without fail.
The most often-seen commonalities between Dragon-types is a sense of strong pride, a strong instinct for claiming and defending territory, and longevity that surpasses any other similar Pokemon.
The pride and longevity combine into a problem when unprepared Trainers attempt to capture and use a Dragon-type Pokemon. As a result, many cultures around the world have their own methods of trying to cultivate a bond with these Dragon-types as a village rather than as an individual- While a single Dragon will almost always outlive a single human, by having the Dragons instead bond with the institution of a village or a group of people, a proper bond can be created. Blackthorn City in Johto is a prime example, living in harmony with their Dratini-line Pokemon.
Pokemon who are bonded with a location or settlement in this way are often thought of as guardian Pokemon. They begin to view the people they have bonded to as their territory, and will fiercely defend it. This brings me to my primary points in instruction on bonding.
As a veterinarian, it is my duty to care for Pokemon, and earn their trust as quickly as possible so I may assess their health. Thus, it is vital to be able to assess a Pokemon's personality, individual characteristics, and the like, as quickly as possible. However, you can still supplement this with basic understanding of their species' needs.
A Dragon-type Pokemon in the wild will often have its own territory, and even kept by a Trainer, it will generally have an area that it will be able to call its own. The most important thing is that, for a Dragon-type Pokemon, you must never enter their territory without first gaining its trust. That is considered an act of aggression, and they will try to remove you. While it is possible to bond with a Pokemon in this way, as many of our specialists here will no doubt be thinking, the bond of battle is best attempted by Dragon specialists, and those who are willing to risk harm to their own body to bond in this way.
A clear demarcation of territory is necessary if you are attempting to bond with a dragon. I have here a Dreepy lent to me for purpose of this lecture, but I have not once met this Dreepy before today. As you can see, it is quite curious. However, there is this line on the ground- A mark of territory. A Dreepy is often nervous to venture outside of the territory protected by a Dragapult, for fear of predation or other threats.
As you can see, the way to handle it is simple- First, you approach. Any signs of threat or hostility would be a sign to back away, but the Dreepy seems all right with my presence. Then, I wait here near, but not at, the edge of its territory.
This communicates to the Dragon that I am not a threat. Dragons have immense pride and territorial instincts- Thus, the greatest way to approach is to simply not be a threat to either. By allowing the Dragon to set the pace of the encounter, you allow them to keep their pride. By not invading their territory, you do not trigger those instincts. Thus, a dragon will feel contentedly in control. By leaving the 'territory' you have denoted for the Dragon's use empty, it can also retreat there at any moment if it so desires.
Through this, the Dreepy has, as you see now, felt curious enough to come out and curl up in my arms here. It may leave again at its own will, or choose to stay here. But now it has bonded with me, at least a bit- I have earned enough of its trust that it will stay with me at least for a time.
The key to bonding with Pokemon of any type is to speak with them in their own language. To communicate to their instincts, in ways they can understand. Dragon-types are the most difficult to reach a mutual understanding in this way with, but that doesn't mean it's impossible. The most important thing is that a Dragon-type demands respect- For its boundaries, and for its own self.
Thank you all for your time.
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mejomonster · 1 year
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Just watched till the end of the moon ep 9:
I'm so down bad for these 2
I cannot stress enough that skipping them to marriage so no stupid "innocence" or naivety stuff as is the usual situation is here
I cannot stress enough how much I LOVE that li susu seems adult, mature, seasoned in battle love etc, and just generally like a late 20s early 30s adult trying to save the world instead of a young adult Hero and how nice it is. Just for me, I'm happy for the variety
I LOVE tantai jin. He's a fucked up guy. He's the wet skinny pathetic man fangirls always say they want. He's genuinely a pretty cold bitch AND he gets to be lead (in a cdrama!). He is monstrous cause bitches have treated him monstrous so like susu said! He responded to a cruel world with cruelty back. It's not a lead I'm used to but I AM loving it. I also love how for him a kind gesture really is worth it's weight in gold like? For him. As awful as ye xiwu was in marriage pre susu, as much as susu literally said she wants to kill him more than anyone else in the world... she keeps saving him. Giving him food. Risking HER life for his. And for him those specific actions are worth more than anything anyone's ever given him. Maybe even more than what Lan gave him, since at least ye xiwu is upfront about wanting to imprison him and being mad at him so like she probably isn't going to "secretly" betray him since she's fairly honest (now). I love that he is JUST a fucked up guy with a fucked up destiny meant to be devil God, who the universe was probably intentionally shitty to cause its hoping (on like a cosmic scale) he will Suffer and Die and become devil God in revenge. I love that its not trying to make the bitch noble. He is who he is. For whatever that means, it's just a story about 2 people who'd never have met. But susu has changed the trajectory just by being herself around him and it's COMPELLING.
The transformative power of love (or simply being kind to another person) and all that. How the cursed jade said she's mostly just SO SURPRISED someone would help another person. I feel like that's probably the Theme of the show right there. Even susu is probably surprised by herself helping him. And in the jade transfer moment, I think she's surprised she genuinely does NOT think he only is comprised of bad traits. For all the cold bitch that he is, betraying her that he's done, cruel view he has of the world... actions speak louder than words to susu too. And for all the bad he's done... he has also done some good things. And she finds herself seeing him in shades of grey instead of a monster like she expected to.
I just love their bickering lets be real. Susu just SAYS shit on the top of her mind (to be fair tantai jin is a bitch and deserves to be bitched at). But she's like "from now on let's have NO CONNECTION" to 6 hours later being like "your life is in my hands and I say when you can die I'm imprisoning you forever ill see you nonstop bitch." And it's like... susu honey, that was LITERALLY tantai jins plan to do to you like 6 hours ago. Yall have the same plan. Just who's the prisoner is switched lmao. No wonder he's oddly attracted to you. You see him being a big manipulative bitch and like you're not stealthy, but you ARE like "WELL FINE ill say some SHIT and BREAK YOUR HEART then. Cry me a river! Oh you thought I was dead? You cried? GOOD. Now anyway fight is over as long as I'm winning!"
Their emotional fights are both ridiculously huge (like rumor of the Kingdoms wild) but also so shallow cause these bitches will be like "I DECIDE when you DIE" then you find them clutching each other in the woods BOTH unwilling to abandon the other and BOTH taking life threatening damage trying to protect the other and BOTH trying to then heal said damage of each others! Like. That's just so fucking funny??!! And fun. Xiao Lin is going to be like "what in the world??" But move on
Anyway speaking of Xiao Lin: I love how he genuinely seems to care for tantai jin! Probably only person in the world who does! I hope one day tantai jin finds out its genuine heartfelt care for him. Buy knowing tantai jins life... he's going to do some awful shit to Xiao lin that ruins his life or kills his wife or kills thousands of innocents in front of him, THEN Xiao lin will be breaking down crying how he never thought tantai jin would do this and he thought tantai jin was a good person who wanted to avoid seeing the ppl in harm and he always wished tantai jin could have a better life. And then tantai jin, probably newly learning compassion from enough bullshit attempts with susu, that his own heart will be breaking BECAUSE of the consequences of his own actions. So. Thrilled to cry later I guess
Speaking of susu and tantai jin. tantai jin LAYING ON HER SHOULDER THINKING ABOUT WHAT SHE BULLSHITTINGLY SAID LOVE WAS AND HOW HE THINKS SHE LOVES HIM AND HOW HE THINKS HE MIGHT LOVE HER AND CUDDLING
that is what watchers want!! (At least me!!) Men lying heads on their lovers shoulders and thinking dreamy about them
Bai Lu gives off such bisexual lead energy tho even without a woman to flirt with I'm sure thats part of the appeal for me. Bottom line is I like in my b/g romances on occasion (who am I kidding more of the time than not) to have a dominant kind of woman. And bai lu delivers. Her man leans on HER shoulder. Is carried around her shoulder with HER arms.
Speaking of, people who cast this were 1. Fulfilling so many wishes letting Luo yunxi just play PURE FUCKED UP and I love it. 2. By casting him as this suffering Weak physically nearly always dying willfully little skinny twink of a man, who's also God tier powerful especially with rage, who's costume entails constant bloody whump, collars, choking and ropes, like. There's a HELLA SPECIFIC NICHE Luo yunxis character resides inside this show and it sure is feeding That Demographic. I'm up for it. It's like if mo ran and chu wanning had a fucked up mashup
I'm fearing the jade maker witch was somehow susu in a past life and now I'm wondering if time travel is gonna be in this bitch
If there IS time travel? I really like the idea of tantai jin specifically time traveling the 2nd time around, once he and susu fell in love, once he knows what susu knew from the beginning. I think that could open a lot of new avenues that he is not currently able to go into given his current personality and knowledge
It's still funny as hell to me tantai jin is kind of angling for death cause he KNOWS he gets super-powered once he dies. But his wife keeps being like NO BITCH YOU GOTTA LIVE WELL. And I'm hoping eventually he's like: maybe she's right... maybe the revenge means more if I'm alive for it and not dissassociated. Maybe I SHOULD try to become a God tier monster without dying. Which would still lead to oh no devil tantai jin lol, but a version of it that is fully Himself which I would like
You know I'm liking a show when I'm contemplating binging beyond what's on youtube rn
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majorasnightmare · 7 months
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Inevitable Gerudo Headcanon Posting
i spend too much time thinking about the gerudo like genuinely theyre one of my favorite recurring tribes in the zelda series, which as we all know is a form of suffering because god forbid nintendo stop relying on racist tropes and caricatures.
keeping in line with this nintendos portrayal of the gerudo tends to either be 1) why theyre bad, and/or 2) how a culture of all women has kids. like thats an oversimplification of ALLL the problems present in the gerudos portrayal but thats a different post for another time. in general i bring this up because it means, for me as well as any others interested and invested un the gerudo, that there is a kind of generalized lack of pre botw characterization or cultural concepts to work with, esp when compared to the other tribes of hyrule. (looks pointedly at how theres no gerudo in the gerudo desert but there is a prison slash execution site where their king was held. LOOKS AT WHO SURVIVED THE PROLOGUE CUTSCENE IN WINDWAKER)
ANYWAYS. botw was really fun because, while it had plenty of its own issues with the gerudo, they were at least non hostile! so with that in mind, the headcanons and worldbuilding i write primarily apply to the wilds era gerudo, which spans the timeframe between ganondorfs reign as king to totk (suspending disbelief because that timeframe is. by all accounts. longer than recorded human history. friendly reminder ganondorf does All That before we even get sheikah wifi towers. christ.)
anyways. second verse same as the first, core assumptions and then a readmore
Some core assumptions:
The BotW branch of the timeline is chronologically set AFTER the previous timeline, ie the events of ToTKs ancient past is set AFTER the last event of the Hyrule Historia timeline. essentially they all come back together to form one line that makes up ToTKs ancient era
The biggest effect on Hyrules topography was the flooding in Wind Waker. after an unknown point, the flooding ocean receded leaving behind the ruins of ancient Hyrule. at some point after that, the zonai settled parts of it and made the buildings wed see as ruins by the time of BotW. slowly the various tribes of hyrule immigrated back
all peoples within the setting of hyrule are loosely grouped into categories called tribes. in this sense, tribe refers a collection of peoples with shared traits, without anything concretely set in stone (for example, hyrule includes the tribe of hylians, the tribe of gorons, the tribe of koroks, etc etc). the main six who show up repeatedly can be considered the sage tribes (gerudo, hylian, sheikah, rito, goron, zora), and the various types of enemies can be considered the monster tribes (the blin tribe of bokoblin, moblin, bulblin, etc)
so. starting at the beginning. near entirely headcanons
in ocarina of time, we see the spirit temple, where Nabooru awakens as a sage. this temple features a MASSIVE statue of a woman adorned with a snake and its primary mechanic centers around mirrors and reflected light. while the mirrors return, we dont really get that same kind of implied spiritual/religious focus again. so instead im going to make a mountain out of a molehill and position her as the primary spiritual figure here. im running low on name ideas tho so suggestions are much appreciated. for right now ill refer to her as the serpent goddess
the gerudo are culturally a people of function over form, practicality over whimsy, but when circumstances allow for it, are drawn like any other to arts and music and decoration. they have a long history of bloody, brutal battle, and while the war has long since ended, its kings buried and its warriors naught but ghosts, the desert remembers. its sands haunted by the bloodstains of conflict past, and echoes of ancient tragedies. the gerudo here in the era of wilds may have lost their records of their ancient history of conflict, but some aspects, preserved by the sands, have managed to survive the onslaught of time
surviving all this time is the ancient creation myth of the gerudo people. as legend tells it, long ago in the time before myth, there existed a goddess whos power was transformation. she was possessed of two forms, one a proud humanoid figure, the other a striking serpentine form twisting through the heavens with ease, her scales glittering with mirror sheen. to shift from serpent to human, she would shed her skin, and grow it back again to embrace her serpentine form anew
seven times she shed her skin, and from these shed skins rose the first gerudo, each embodying a key aspect of their sacred mother. the serpent goddess's scales are each a nascent soul of a gerudo, and when those scales are shed and fall to the land below, a new gerudo is born. likewise, when a gerudo dies, their soul returns to the scales of the serpent goddess, to await until they would descend again and reincarnate once more. the seven daughters of the serpent goddess led these gerudo as their guardians, leaders, and protectors. but, away from the seven heroines and their new people, the goddess shed her skin an eighth time. this daughter was born alone, and while her sisters embodies the strengths of spirit, flight, endurance, knowledge, motion, skill, and gentleness, the eighth was born with insatiable wanderlust. learning of this, the seven sisters cursed her name for leaving them and their people behind, and despite their shared ancestry, the eighth was forbidden to be spoken of. this suited her just fine, and the eighth was free to walk the land and learn all of its hidden paths
in time, war came to the gerudo, as it often does. though they were united, and strong, they were a small collection of people, and thus despite their proficiency were threatened nonetheless. it became clear at last that they could not stand and fight, and that to survive, they could not remain in place for long. but the enemy had pushed them deep into their home, and knew all the paths back. as hope seemed lost, as if summoned by call, the eighth sister at last wandered home. calling her seven sisters to her, she proclaimed that every hidden step was known to her, and while she lacked the power to guide them on her own, together they would escape unseen into the night, their enemy none the wiser. thus, skillfully guiding the skills of her sisters, the eighth heroine led the gerudo into safety, and the seven were humbled from their pettiness. seeking to apologize to the sister they had banished and forgotten, the seven sought to make amends, but the eighth was content merely to have a place of remembrance among them. to wander is not a sin, as long as one remembers where their home lies.
the eight heroines have long since passed and returned to their mothers scales, but the virtues they embody are cherished by the gerudo family they left behind, seeking to hold their memory close even as the years wear on
to the gerudo was bestowed the blessing of the element of Spirit, embodied by their iron wills and manifesting as crackling lightning. this spirit lightning is the gerudo's will made tangible, arcing out towards their target as an extension of their focus and sheer determination. to a gerudo, nothing is impossible until one has devoted themselves entirely to it, giving it their all, and only then may it be conceded
a long history of persecution has resulted in the gerudo being increasingly insular and isolationist. their admiration of the art of combat and how it can bring forth an individuals talents, achieving a perfect harmony between body and will as the weapon became an extension of ones limbs, was often perceived as aggression by outsiders, who would react as if to defend their own interests. the gerudo have suffered much at the hands of hyrule at large, and have pulled further and further away.
as the gerudo pulled away from hyrule, and hyrule from them, they devoted most of their attention to themselves. cooperation amongst themselves is seen as paramount to their survival, and familial affection often extends well past ones blood relations.
the gerudo value family, and loyalty, alongside independence and cooperation. everyone should have the opportunity to pursue their goals, but if someone is struggling, it is the responsibility of everyone to help. children are raised by as many people as are available, and even in the times of monarchy, the palace was less a formal dwelling place belonging to the gerudo ruler and more a public forum that the ruler simply happened to live in
most of the palaces amenities are fully public, a tradition that has carried on to riju's time. meals are communal and the kitchens open to all, and the palace has no strictly dedicated servants, merely a collection of amenities the gerudo people are free to use at will and often do so together. what this means is that there is no servant, for example, dedicated to preparing riju's meals but instead a collection of people willing to cook and willing to eat making meals riju partakes in, and this applies to most other menial tasks as well. the throne room is where the leader of the gerudo engages in their job as public servant, attending to the needs of the gerudo at large and responding to crises as they arise.
as nintendo is keen to point out, the gerudo are a people that are predominantly "all women", and thus spends plenty of time going over dialogue wherein people wonder how they have children and including a plethora of sidequests in the wilds era about acquiring partners. im ignoring all of that and instead going by lizard rules, in part because here theyre descended from a serpent dragon goddess, wherein a population of all female lizards were able to successfully maintain a stable population and have children without major issue. gerudo like ganondorf are the equivalent of a rare genetic mutation that flips some other genes on and has a different result, that really doesnt affect anything besides this one kid and doesnt have any major effects or differences in their life. two gerudo are perfectly capable of having kids together, having relationships as usual, and on the topic of "how do the gerudo have kids", thats all i really feel like exploring that topic
with an insular, isolationist culture that appeared for all intents and purposes to be all women, the gerudo were often a source of major culture shock when interacting with the other tribes of hyrule, most notably hylians
bonus hylian lore: hylians experience an even greater lack of sexual dimorphism than irl humans do, so gender presentation is near exclusively presentation based, with a heavy emphasis on clothing. showing skin is considered an act of emotional intimacy, and most hylians opt to cover as much as they can. the intensity of presentation scales upwards with their role in society, with the royal family having the most extreme form of gender presentation. gender is presented through clothing style and hair length, with ornamentation, jewelry, and piercings serving as a kind of intensifier, and hylian culture at large tends to operate on a sliding scale of masculine to feminine, with the middle androgynous zone being a weird gender spot for them
the gerudo, by contrast, never really developed a concept of masculinity versus femininity. gender pronouns in gerudo are based on personal proximity, occupation in society, and familiarity. these barely translate at all into hyrulean.
as the gerudo, by circumstance or by choice, interacted with hylians and the tribes of hyrule more and more often, some kind of understanding had to be reached with regards to translation. as relations were already terse, making an attempt to fully translate the gerudos understanding of gender to your average hylian was considered a fools errand, and thus translation was done in broad strokes, giving hylians the simplest root form of gender pronouns (and none of the increasingly specific declensions). loosely, the term vai is closer in concept to "us" and voe is closer to "not us" "foreigner" "outsider", and has taken on a connotation of " forbidden" or "taboo" (leading to wilds era gerudo secret clubs often imploying translatable Adult Puns regarding their catering to voe and the overall titillating atmosphere they tend to put on for customers). with regards to hylians, the feminine princesses and queens had more in common with the gerudo and were thus "vai", but the masculine kings and soldiers, who were often the main figures pushing aggressive efforts into conquering or otherwise absorbing the gerudo into hyrule, were "voe". this was then distributed in various guides to understanding the gerudo language as " vai" meaning "woman" and "voe" meaning man
gerudo town, as the capital of their people and general hub, has a law banning the entrance of voe. at the time if its writing, this was a fairly obvious law, because most "people who are forbidden" are forbidden from entering. as time has passed, hostilities cooled, and relations warmed, this law has been the subject of a long struggle of interpretation. it doesnt translate well into nearly any other language, and thus who counts as "voe" and "vai" is subject to endless debate. the differences in gender perception are most clearly on display with the admittance of the gorons. one might assume that the gorons, being a monogendered people who typically use masculine terms of identity and endearment in hyrulean, to thus qualify as voe, but the gorons cooperative nature, near uniform monogendered culture, and emphasis on hard work and independence has enough in common with your average gerudo that considering them as vai is a no brainer
ganondorf thus is also, clearly, considered vai. the specific pronouns he uses in his native gerudo include declensions regarding his position as royalty (one that has since gone out of use and is fairly archaic now, only really being used as a kind of neo-pronoun by current era gerudo as a rebellious self identification thing), his relation as the only child of koume and kotake, and are conjugated based on relation between the speaker and him. in the ancient era, calling ganondorf voe would be so confusing as to not even read as an insult. if one really wanted to refer to ganondorf with a tone of insult, theyd substitute the declension of familiarity with one used for strangers
ganondorf achieved his position as king the old fashioned way: a gift from his moms. ancient era gerudo practiced typical monarchy with a line of succession, and koume and kotake named him as the next royal of the gerudo as their heir. the hyruleans, seeing a masculine gerudo of royal birth, referred to him as "king", and correcting a culture of people he had little respect for was just a waste of ganondorfs time. after ganondorfs sealing, the gerudo changed to the current system of chiefs, wherein the current chief names a successor, or by default passes it onto their living heir. a system is in place to democratically install a new chief if the current one passes without naming a child their heir, or naming a successor in their place, a system drafted and then used in ganondorfs absence. riju thus inherited the mantle from her mother, but could opt instead to force a vote, or have such a vote forced on her due to her age, leading to much of her insecurity seen in BotW. this system has proven to be relatively stable, especially coupled with the continued tradition of keeping the palace an open public forum
the first chief of the gerudo was nabooru, advised by the sage of lightning we see in totk, following ganondorfs sealing
the gerudo are very familiar with the souls of the dead. poes, souls lost and aimless, wander the desert after millennia of bloodshed. thus their funerary customs have persisted, even as the folklore behind them fades in and out of memory.
a person perceives reality through their body. they know the sky is above them both by craning their neck up, and by the sensation of ground beneath them. in death, one is bodiless, and sensation becomes a confusing, directionless onslaught. it is so easy for a spirit to become lost, unable to orient themselves. the gerudos funerary rites seeks to aid these souls in their journey towards returning to the serpent goddess, as without guidance they are liable to become poes. the body after death is merely an empty receptacle, and on a practical level is a potential draw for dangerous desert scavengers seeking an easy meal. the shifting sands and hard soil makes burial difficult to impossible, so instead the gerudo burn their dead. smoke is ephemeral and thus able to be seen by spirits, and even as the wind rushes, smoke will still travel upwards towards the heavens. a spirit will linger by its body for a time, and thus cremation helps provide guidance to the dead. unable to feel the earth beneath them, the dead can follow the trails of smoke to orient themselves upwards, and dispel lingering confusion
as the body is burned both to guide the departed's soul and to ward away scavengers, the gerudo inter their belongings into gravesites instead, usually one or a small collection of items that the deceased valued or were considered emblematic of them. having a proud history of warriors, many gerudo consider their weapons extensions of themselves, and thus many gravesites will consist of a single weapon.
the sage of lightnings temple served as the primary gravesite for many gerudo, and in its heyday was decorated with love and care as befitting its role. torches burned bright in its sconces and the walls painted with care in massive sweeping murals. here in the temple, a foreigners idea of the gerudo as austere and practical would fall away, as the halls shone with warmth and color, taken from their desert home
lost souls that become poes often end up becoming consumed by their regrets and despair at their inability to find their way back to reincarnation through the serpent goddess's scales, and from there turn to rage and aggression. the sunlight glinting off of the goddess's mirror scales will blind and disorient the dead who have lost their way, as they try in vain to rely on their half forgotten senses, and thus poes eschew the day in favor of the cover of night. though incorporeal, poes move as fast as the desert winds, and try all they can to cause mischief and havoc. usually the end result of their shenanigans is light injuries and scratches, but it isn't uncommon for a waylaid traveller or adrenaline seeking youngster to suffer fatal consequences. despite this, poe hunting tends to be the go-to act of rebellion for antsy teenagers with a taste for danger. in general, one of the only things fast enough to strike a poe is a fired arrow
as the sands grew and the desert expanded, it grew more and more difficult for the steeds of the gerudo to gallop across the dunes, and they were driven further and further back until the gerudo phased out their horseback traditions entirely
and as an AU specific trivia tidbit
after ganondorf's sealing, nabooru grieved the loss of her childhood friend by constructing a dedicated tomb to house ganondorf's gravesite. even though he wouldn't die, nabooru would never live to see him again, and in traditional gerudo fashion, his gravesite is marked by his signature trident, further imbued by nabooru's blessing of lighting (in a similar fashion to urbosa's fury, despite urbosa not being a sage).
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artheresy · 30 days
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An argument over whether or not Dan Heng is Dan Feng seems to have begun getting sparked again in certain parts of the Fandom and it does nothing but hurt my head to no end
Both sides cherrypicking or treating it like a strange situation, making false equivalents. "Yknow governments don't consider people who've lost their memories to be separate people" that's a flawed argument to use in favorite of DH = DF because it's not just he lost his memories. He literally grew up, experienced his own childhood, had a whole identity cultivated based on those experiences and that life and continues to live his own life. To treat the situation like it's just him getting a bit of amnesia is wild to me
But also I hate when people continue to insist he's running from Dan Feng and his past and how he's miserable and shouldn't ever confront the past and deal with it as if his and Blade's whole stories aren't centered around rebirth and karma, paying for your past life's karma. He needed to confront the past to ensure a freer future! He literally has!! And he will continue to do so because he realizes this, DH isn't dumb and he's grown since we first saw him. He understands
But yeah uh I'm so tired
This whole thing feels very Ship of Theseus. What makes the ship what it is, the physical aspects of its planks, its sailing history, or both?
For him, the question is what makes someone who they are? Is it the body that makes them up and any inherent genetic factors (like traits)? Is it their experiences, how they've grown up, and the identity they've developed in that time? Or is it both factors mixed together?
Personally in the case of Dan Heng, I think it's both! Yeah he has a lot of traits from Dan Feng. There's a lot inherently there. But we can't disregard his own experiences and the identity that has formed based on his history and what he's seen.
Again I can't stress this enough... It is a false equivalent to compare him to people who lose their memories or get amnesia, he didn't just lose those memories. He started life from the beginning, a whole different kind of life. And even then, the amnesia topic comes with its own debates. Isn't there a whole other thought experiment regarding someone put to trial who ends up with amnesia and what their verdict should be?
I guess in the end, it's all up to people's own philosophical beliefs after what constitutes a person. My personal belief that DH and DF will always be connect but the separation between them is also meaningful is something based on my own ideas of what consisitutes a person and their individual identity, similar situation with how I see Rukkhadevata and Nahida as connected but still not the same person exactly. At the end of the day again, it's personal beliefs
But what I can't stand and can't stand by, is someone acting all high and mighty like they're perfectly right and everyone else is wrong, especially when they're cherrypicking or not holding all their evidence to the same standard. According to some ppl, apparently it's better in the CN fandom where instead of treating it like "I'm right you're wrong" people have divided themselves into "DF and DH one person" and "DF and DH two people" groups and most importantly of all, they treat both like theories and just keep to their space and tag which they believe when it's relevant. Why can't we just do that? Why can't we follow in their footsteps instead of bringing up this argument every so often with the same tired flaws from both sides?
#Lore discussion in this community can be so tiring#I wish more people would be open to their viewpoint being challenged instead of believing they can never ever be wrong#And seeing people throw out wild accusations#Like someone saying people are transphobic if they believe dh is df like what?#I get it if you identity with dh and read it as a trans narrative personally even if I dont#Doesn't mean you can call people transphobic over it#I dunno I'm tired#Everything I see this topic I get mad#“He says you're my past in the ichor of two dragons!!”#He also says right after “But you won't follow me into my future” so your point is?#Additionally if we're being 100% real that animation feels like it's less about his rejection and eventual acceptance of DF specifically#It feels more so like his rejection of the role of Imbibitor Lunae given what I've talked about about the DF being there would never say#Any of those things how it's based on his biased view of him and is a projection of things he was told growing up likely#So I'm tired#One of the only good arguments I've ever seen to say DH is DF is in regards to how he clings to DF's old stuff#I have things to say about it personally#But it's a MILES better argument than some of the other ones I've seen and even then my arguments against it would still be an up for#Interpretation kind of thing like the initial argument rather than pointing out someone is looking at the full picture#Again I respect how people see it! Believe what you want to believe about it again it's all about our own perspectives#Just don't be a dick to people on either side if you don't agree with them#Dan heng#Dan feng#Hsr#Honkai star rail
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lud1crousal · 9 days
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alterhuman alphabet :3
amazing alphabet done by local-xenogender-icon with pathetic answers by me!
A - awakening
i realized i was an therian around 2020. ( i had a lot of free time to actually think about stuff ) .
as for my fictionkins? i never knew the term for it and just assumed it was a tism thing (which, i mean.. it kinda is for me) so i guess you can say since i was 6 or around the age!
B - balance
i dont have any friends. this is 100% a tism thing, but a part of me feels like its an alterhuman thing. i dont understand people that well, but i understand animals!!
as for my grades at school, and navigating school in general- its kinda weird knowing everyone around me is human. my grades are fine, infact im ahead of most people my age. i can communicate with my teachers and peers decently (only when necessary i panic otherwise-) and i get my work done usually on time and easily.
i do experience phantom shifts at school, but they never get in the way!! other than that, im like a spy, sent to spy on the humans !!
C - city
NOPE!!! though i dont really like where i live either... its really conservative.
i got harassed one time while going on a walk just because my hair is un-naturally colored.. :-(
D - diary
Actually, i did come into possession of a diary i could use, but im not to sure how to start one!
E - experience in the community
it kind of depends. the ytubers seem cool, and so do people on tumblr. just a bit intimidating i guess? tiktok is cool too, i love seeing peoples masks and stuff.. but its kinda toxic. mainly because it gives easier access to mainstream without proper education on the topic.
definitely one of the nicer community's ive been in though!!
F - friends
no............... i did try to tell my older sister in 2020 but she judges a lot, im scared to try again. she knows i do quads and judges them for me ALOT! but she loves me (i think-) and shes the only 'friend' i have so-.
G - gear
i own a coyote tail, and ive got masks !!! i also have pets, might seem weird to say their gear but they feel like my little family, even when im more coyote than cat. I also have raccoon stuffies!
I - identity
theriotypes - coyote, rusty spotted cat, siberan-mainecoone mix cat.
kintypes - dave strider, ponyboy curtis
other- raccoon copinglink, feline genus otherhearted
J - jokes
both. it depends on my mood, but im mostly joking around :)
K - knowldege
7/10 :0 im so invested on researching though... so this # will go up im sure. (i say 7 for alot of things though... )
L - liking, loving
i love them :3 its funny, because ive never liked dogs, but my 'main' theriotype is a canine.
N - nature
WILD!!! well, except for my siberian-mainecoone cat. its actually my old (and unfortunely dead) cat.
O - otherhearted
the entire feline genus. ive known this since i was little i think, just never knew the term.
P - popularity
i think my rusty spotted cat is the rarest. im pretty sure my coyote may be the most common?
R - real body
im trans and used to struggle with an ed, so absolutely. my kins effect this heavily as were all male yet we dont represent that on the outside. i sometimes experience species dysphoria, but i think i identify as human just as much as i do animal.
S - sex
no? i think this question might be more for others ahA-
i think my theriotypes are me, and therefore would have the same sex as me.
(though i am female sex, we can pretend i am not- )
T - traits
this is kinda hard to awnser. im not really territoral, but i like to have my own territory, you know? and its like that with basically everything-
i hate putting my own experiences in my own words asidjijfeo0fo
Urges
I lowkey get preydrive as a cat, because i hear birds so often- i think ive learnt to control it growing up, so i can handle it easily.
bonus of living in the country i guess?
W - wondering
wowowowowo (+ my pfp)
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Y - yarn
both? though the tail i have currently is real fur.
Z - zoo
They make me sad. I would much rather go to a rescue than a zoo.
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i-heart-hxh · 4 months
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Hi! Your recent posts about Zoldycks got me thinking about something I was already mulling over, and stirred even more thoughts, sorry if my ramblings will get too much into headcanoning territory 🙏
I was thinking about the differences in Zoldyck children's personalities, and how much of is innate and how much is a result of conditioning.
Of course, it might just happen that Killua is naturally more rebellious than his siblings, but the way Silva treats him makes me wonder. Sure, Silva's very manipulative, but he does allow Killua to go out in the world, something that could potentially only strengthen his individualistic personality (and we see how Kikyo really doesn't like the idea of Killua in the wild). The needle prevents him from dangerous fights and fully protecting his friend(s), but it doesn't stop him from meeting new people, gaining new experiences.
Illumi says an assassin should be without passion and fire, focused only on the job, and it may be true... about what he was taught. I don't consider Illumi as a fully reliable source, especially with later evidences that he himself isn't the most stable person, but he's good at presenting himself as this emotionless perfect assassin.
So what I'm seeing there: Zoldyck children, other than Killua, are meant to be, for the lack of a better word, "employees". They're here to listen to orders, and just do their job without much thought. Both Illumi and Kalluto clearly conform to this idea, they don't show much emotion and treat the family as the priority. I feel like Milluki is kinda deemed as a failure, but even he takes the supporting role as a family "tech guy".
Meanwhile, Killua is meant to be the head of the family, The Leader. And what leader is passionless and obedient? It wouldn't make sense to completely break Killua's character, as his strong will could actually be the positive trait in that context. I think his training was more focused on shaping him in the "right" direction, eradicating his compassion, but keeping some of his individuality, and that's why he's so different from his siblings.
Hello!
This is a great bit of insight and well-worded--I agree with what you're saying here, and I have very similar lines of thought around what makes Killua a good candidate for leading the Zoldyck family and what disqualifies the other siblings, as well as what exactly the family is trying to foster in Killua.
I do definitely think that they want Killua to have some ability to think independently and make his own decisions (qualities of a good leader), which very well might be an aspect of why Silva allowed him to leave--along with Silva's confidence that the needle would do its job and bring him back sooner or later (and most likely disillusioned with friendship by then), of course. Killua having a mind of his own also might be part of why he was chosen as the heir in the first place--it may be an aspect of his "potential," though of course the specific way his individuality manifests is a problem for them. They're certainly trying to break him of his compassion and desire for friendship because those are the opposite of useful skills for an assassin, but I suspect they're trying to preserve his ability to lead the family and carefully consider options presented to him, so from their perspective it's a delicate balance they're trying to strike in how they raise and encourage him.
This is part of why I believe his upbringing must have involved a combination of being treated "well" (as usual, by Zoldyck standards) and being chastised and punished for the parts of him they consider unacceptable. Too much of being treated "well" and he wouldn't bend to what they want, but too much punishment might break his spirit in a way that's not desirable to them, so there must have been a constant back-and-forth on how to treat him in order for him to come out how they've envisioned. You see this tug-of-war in the Zoldyck arc with the different ways Zeno, Silva, and Kikyo behave with regards to Killua, and we even see some bickering about which is the "right" way to treat him--with Zeno having a somewhat hands-off approach and letting him free from being punished (being "soft" on him), Silva letting Killua go and having faith that he'll come back (via a devious set-up with the needle and blood vow), and Kikyo trying to keep Killua locked up where she has full control of him and his development.
I brought this up in a previous post, but I could see the training going too far with Illumi, and it's part of what leads to him being the way he is, both with regards to his instability and his extreme prioritization of the family.
I also agree that the other siblings come across as obedient, loyal to the family, and not possessing much independent will. Like you said, it's interesting to think about how much of their personalities are nature vs nurture. Under the extreme situations they're exposed to, the way they've been raised and treated must play a big role, though. I wonder at what point it's determined if a child is a candidate for being the heir or not, because that must majorly affect their treatment growing up.
Anyway, thanks for the thoughtful submission!
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centrally-unplanned · 4 months
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Sarah Z released a new video on Buffy Season 6 - looks like she isn't the only one doing a recent Buffy binge, great minds Sarah! Given her long track record as a Buffy lover I give her props for finally going all in and making a project of it. As is going to be a surprise to no one, I am pretty middling on this video - lets go to the random thoughts:
--- My first comment on this was going be a bit of a question mark around its title, "In Defense of Buffy's Most Hated Season". Season 6? Most hated? Sure you not thinking of Season 4? Or Season 1? Season 6 is very consistently ranked as a higher Season by most - no Season 5 or 3, sure, but normally top 3 or 4. Its a bit of a "cultural baggage" idea - because of, hm, reasons, it was an extremely controversial season back in the day. But removed from its airing that drama faded away, and particularly given that season 6's musical episode is one of the most lasting legacies of the show, now it stands on its merits and is generally liked. Sarah even almost accidentally cops to that with one of her example reddit posts, from a Season 6 hater but who frames that as a hot take:
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However, looks like we agree, because Sarah changed the name of the video! Now its called "You Should Watch Buffy Season 6". I respect and empathize, honestly, realizing the cultural consensus has changed can take some time.
--- For a movie review about defending Season 6, it actually spends half of its analytical run-time criticizing it. And I was not swayed by these - which I am sad about, I have my critiques of the season too. Just trying to explain why the following thoughts are about criticisms, given the title.
--- Does anyone out there interpret Riley's departure in Season 5, and one-episode return in Season 6, as Buffy "losing a good man, and being shown the life she could have had married to him if she didn't screw up"? Because that is what Sarah thinks, and that to me is a buck wild take. Riley is not a subtle character, its pretty much a defining trait of his. Pretty sure his departure in Season 5 is him leaving a bad relationship, that is bad for him and Buffy, and Buffy realizing too late that she was letting pride and self-involvement get in the way of fixing it. Not that it necessarily could be fixed, or should be, just that that was the source. And in season 6 - this to me can't be any clearer - Riley's point in returning is to highlight that he, who was in an awful place in Season 5, got better. He got over it. He's strong even when he doesn't look it. And Buffy is too. She will get over it. Its why she breaks up with Spike at the end of the episode - Buffy realizes she is still strong, she can be way she 'used' to be. It does not forgive Riley's mistakes, or is even about any of that? This is a very weird take. Honestly I want to know if others have this take, tell me if you do.
--- This very weird take by the way comes from the "misogyny" moments that the video constantly alludes to, which tie back into Joss Whedon's behavior, which I want to flag here. I'll admit that from what I have seen of the evidence, while Joss does come off like a huge asshole on set, I actually haven't seen much of a case for a lot more than that. Some people see him as this like uber-predator and I don't know where that is coming from. So I might be biased a bit here, lacking that heft of conviction.
But I still think this is generally correct - someone's personal behavior is an extremely imperfect reflection of their writing chops. Some of the most insightful prose of all time was writing for crass monetization; serial abusers have written, in spades, the most complex and well-realized victim protagonists. Writing is a skill, not a morality trait. Personal action impacts writing, sure, but not in ways that *align* with morality. The fact that Joss Whedon was an asshole on set does not mean the writing on Buffy reflects misogynist abuse. Xander isn't a misogynist - when he is mad at Anya for sleeping with Spike he is portrayed by the narrative as a clear asshole. Riley isn't portrayed as a perfect boyfriend, dude fucking pays vampires to bite him! This all in your head! You don't have to like prove Joss Whedon is a bad dude through textual analysis. His work can still be #girlboss feminism, there is no contradiction there.
--- This will be brief, but I feel like we are past the weird 2010's hiccup of thinking "fridging" is a problem, right? This is about Tara's death, ofc. Stories aren't real life, in stories some characters are way more important than others. Side characters exist, very often, to further the arcs of those main characters. One of them dying as part of a main character's arc is completely normal. Its weird I feel I have to explain this; I don't really, right? Tara is not killed off on a whim; she dies because Willow has a season-long arc of tipping over the edge on magic power, its a lot about her relationship with Tara, and her death pushes her over the brink. I'll admit I find Dark!Willow's execution to be a bit weak, but that's its own problem; the motive is solid. This is how stories work.
--- Additionally, I think there is a big, but a bit unnoticed, shift in what "works" in media around character deaths. When Joss Whedon killed Tara in Buffy - and more notably killed Wash in Serenity - he was doing a deliberate "no one is safe" thing. It became a meme, actually!
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Meme-ing about Joss Whedon man, right there in the garbage dumb of the past alongside Harry Potter memes shitting on Twilight thinking its the better franchise; life comes at you fast. But anyway this was a "big thing" to happen - audiences were shocked by it! It had dramatic impact.
Then Game of Thrones happened and this got turned up to 11, and the general plot twist even more of a meme. But meanwhile, TV changed in the background; entire seasons were getting dumped at once on streaming, everything was becoming "high context" with actors live tweeting their own set experiences, fandoms got more involved and contextual, "water-cooler" shows everyone was talking about faded due to audience separation, all sorts of shit. Which meant that the "kill a main character" thing stopped being powerful - it was overplayed, spoilers were more common, it didn't "air" as a standalone episode everyone talked about. The reason to kill off a character to raise the stakes faded away.
Which means when people go back and say things like "oh I loved Tara why kill her", its...well for one Amber Benson wanted to leave the show. But additionally you can't see the power it had in 2002. TV was different then, it wanted different things.
--- To give something positive, while I think Spike's attempted rape of Buffy is a strong writing choice - very in character for Spike, and its fine that it is primarily about his arc and not Buffy's because its a story, that is how these things work - I do agree that Buffy's response to the event is just not explored enough. It comes up multiple times of course, even in Season 7, but it also gets swamped by plot events in Season 6 with Willow, its not given room to breathe.
This imo relates to the fact that the pacing of the event is a bit wonky - Spike & Buffy had been on the outs for many episodes at that point, there wasn't this strong inciting incident for it. If it had happened much closer to their breakup, in a more focused arc, it would have had more narrative impact and allowed time for both of them to respond to it. I get that they had a lot of plot balls to juggle at that point, but still, missed opportunity I think.
Okay I had more thoughts but I am tired, I think that covers my most interesting complaints/observations anyway.
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hundrkottr · 7 months
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Just some thoughts I wanted to share. 🐺
//Topic - My nonhuman childhood and how it was never caused by media//
I commonly come across people who blame the internet and media influence for therianthropy/nonhumanity. And I can definitely see how that CAN indeed happen. I mean, media REALLY influences people, especially children/minors who are in their mental development stages.
For myself though its never really been the case? I dont mean "ive always felt i wasnt human". Like.. yes but its more than that.
As a child I believed I was some kind of physical shapeshifting creature. I believed puberty would transform me into the animal i was supposed to be.
Delusional right? Well, I was a child. And I never had anybody to tell me why i felt like that. I didnt have television, the internet or media. I had no way of understanding something that was never shown or taught. Not like any adult would ever even talk about this to begin with. Not until social media evolved of course. So yea... i believed "i must be physically nonhuman in some sense? Like... a hybrid?"
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I knew the things that made me nonhuman. The animalistic desires and behaviours that surpass what is normal for a human being. Even more abnormal than earlier human ancestors. I felt limbs that werent there I thought, "if amputees can feel absent limbs.. well.. maybe mine were removed? Or they have yet to grow?"
Sure autism could influence my experiences. But regardless. These arnt normal behaviours.
I did know to hide my behaviours from adults though. My lil sister was the only one to see it. Id walk on all fours, id gnaw on dog bones and tree branches, id drink from puddles, id eat grass, id bark and growl and howl. Id hunt for real animals, roll in mud and stinky substances, I played more with dogs and cats than i did people. I ate anything that seemed edible outside (dont do this kids, its dangerous pfft). I wanted my meat as close to fresh and raw as possible (no seasonings or anything). I wore bandanas around my neck, because collars were a "no-no". I wore ears, and tails made of scarves. I let my nails grow and obsessed over my canine teeth.
This could all have been explained by early imprinting on dogs. But... i never had any close connections to dogs until much later on after these behaviours were already noticeable. I only had imprinted on cats, but that behaviour was entirely different. And all were indoor cats who lazied around. Nothing like the wild canine brained creature that I believed i was.
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After over a decade of nonhuman behaviours, once puberty set in, i realized I wasnt becoming an animal. And slowly that realization sunk in, and I lost a part of myself. I felt alone, lost, confused. I stopped being myself for many years. Forcing a mask. Hiding my autistic traits, and my non-human behaviours. Wearing a mask and trying to be what others considered normal.
Until, I found the therian community.
I was 16 by then. And it was through my new stepsister who shared so with me.
I can remember finally feeling like I understood a part of myself. I wasnt crazy, or psychotic. I wasnt delusional. I was what people called a therianthrope. Someone who psychologically or spiritually is an animal. Within, not physically of course. People who weren't crazy. And who had a diversity of animal identities. Dogs, cats, birds, horses, fish and deer. All kinds. And not just children either. Adults, kids and other teens like myself.
I found a place I could belong. (A bit more at least, i still have a hard time belonging here.)
Now, after years, my identity is solid. I may not use any labels, but in some shape or form, psychologically or spiritually, i am and have always been a canine and a bear. I do still hide my animalistic traits from the public and my peers/family. But i express it when i can, in my own home or the woods that we own. 🐾
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// When it comes to being a walk-in spirit, thats an entirely different thing. And i didnt mention the experiences tied to that. Its not the same, despite having some influence on my nonhuman identities. //
Alright! Thats it. That was quite a handful of information. But hope it was enjoyed. If anybody read it at all.
You can share your own with me if you'd like. Either in a comment, as a share or DM. 🌱
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raayllum · 8 months
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I love your aspec rayllum posts so much, and I've gotta say you describe qprs better than most posts I've seen (and I've done tons of research into it). I was wondering though if you minded talking a bit about being alterous, bc I've done some research into that recently, and I was thrilled to find someone in the wild who identifies as it while just looking around for posts for this fun dragon show!
Thank you for the kind words!! My own relationship with my partner is very much a QPR at its core (with a smidge of 'romance' whatever that tangibly means lol) and I've been pretty entrenched in the ace community reading wise since 2016 so that probably helps!
Being alterous is hard to describe, but here are the metaphors I've found help / how my experiences have manifested. Other alterous people may or may not relate and this is also probably affected by me being ace (so no physical and very little aesthetic attraction either!)
Very inconsistent 'crush' feelings that were hard to identify because I'm genuinely, equally down just being someone's friend. Think liking someone right away as a crush, but the next week there's nothing so you figure "huh just as a friend then" and then next week the feelings come back and then the week after that they're gone. Cue rinse and repeat
On that note: because the romantic fuzzies are inconsistent, the platonic core rules all. For most of my loved ones (before I got into my one & current relationship) that meant they had 'a door' I could've opened if they'd said to me they wanted a relationship / life partnership and I'd be down with it, although there are some people I am extremely close to who don't have a door I can open on my end, so... yeah. Not every platonic relationship has that potential to get another layer stacked on top but the foundation has to be there Regardless
The more emotionally compatible you are with someone, the more attractive they are. The root of attraction (since I also don't experience a ton of aesthetic attraction) for me at least is usually admiration (traits, talents, smarts, kindness, etc).
If you can't see yourself being friends / aren't friends with them, any other kind of interest is dead on arrival
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party-gilmore · 7 months
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absolutely wild learning about my austistic leanings later in life because like
my parents just thought i was “eccentric” and found me rather entertaining, weirdness and all (plus their own probably undiagnosed AuDHD making their benchmark for normal skewed anyway) and my mon specifically was always so “mever change for anyone just be you” from a very young age so i just…
never experienced the concept of masking i guess?
Not as masking, I mean.
i would read accounts from autistic people talking about their experiences and struggles and pressure to conform and masking and the mental effects thereof and i would feel empathy because i “went through similar issues” but i th
i thought i was just being bullied for being Weird. just in general. like kids do. that this was a case of “well this sounds a lot like what i go through, but im not actually autistic so it probably isnt my place to join the conversation.”
it just never clicked that, “um. hi. these are the exact same behaviors you do. and there were moments in your life that almost led you to masking. because thats what it would’ve been. masking. but your dumb ass thought it wouldve just been ‘changing how you act and who you are in order to be bullied less’ which okay TECHNICALLY yes that is an accurate if watered down description of masking too, but.
Then you refused to on principle, because bullying is bad and fuck you and got angry about it to the point of overcompensating and INCREASING your Behaviors (tm) until you completely skipped over one of the key experiences that wouldve helped you identify with other people on the spectrum later in life.”
I just rolled through life like a steamroller of righteous, spiteful confidence that my preferences and actions were nobody’s business but my own and vice versa unless they clearly and directly affected others - so much so that I never actually set any kind of benchmark pattern for the way (NT) people around me act.
So I never had a benchmark for masking.
like im going back through all my memories of friendships that soured because i took everything at face value instead of trying to read deeper into cues. because I would always just say what i wanted people to know, straight up. like if i wanted attention i would ask for it if i wanted them to know i was hurt i would tell them. That made so much sense to me i assumed that was the norm. Because clearly. Thats logical. and obvious. So certainly other people are doing the same.
I got blinsided a LOT by the games my school friends and later some early adult friends played, yeah, but AGAIN (see: steamroller of self confidence) I simply assumed that was THEIR problem, not mine, and just… grieved the friendship and hoped for their sake they’d eventually sort their shit out 🤣
I literally thought they were the ones having difficulty with social contracts and cues and relationships.
Then over the past couple years the more I see accounts from other people in the AuDHD spectrum, like “yeah neurotypicals actually [thing i had been assuming was just an asshole trait for years without questioning it], heres what they really mean and a good script for responding” and “its funny how i [exact behavior i did for years] and no one realized i was austistic till later” im like… 🙃
And the last kicker was the post about food touching with the tag response “sometimes masking your autistic traits ends up more autistic than the unmasked trait” and my gut reactions were, in order:
…why would you bother to mask that, why is the way you eat anyone elses business?
i mean i guess it would ease up the pressure a bit, i got bullied for that too, i can see how maybe you wouldnt want to have to put… up with…
oHHHH SHIT IS THAT WHAT IT WOULDVE BEEN. IF I HADNT BEEN SO ANGRY ABOUT BEING ASKED TO CHANGE. IT WOULDVE BEEN MASKING. IF I’D KNOWN WHAT THAT WAS. THIS WHOLE TIME.
its just… its just been a series of months of me shaking my head and realizing my entire life has been that meme like “Am I having difficulties connecting socially??? No, it is everyone else who is wrong.”
🤣 girl help
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malka-lisitsa · 14 days
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Positivity Anon! Can I get you to say three nice things about yourself? Spreading positivity is amazing, but sometimes you need to spread it to yourself too!
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Three nice things about me- I'll do it just to support the wave of anon positivity.
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one - I've worked very hard to gain my reputation here and despite the daggers that come with the crown I'm very proud of the little empire i've built with my blog and the followers I've gained on my tumblr journey here. I don't even mind the Novi hate club.
two - which brings me to number two. I am also very proud of the confidence I've gained over the years. Even just three years ago some of the hate ive gotten would have sent me into a spiral and I probably would have deleted or something. Fortunately, now it doesn't bother me at all. I remain unfazed and even have a little fun putting them on their asses.
three - I like to think that usually im a straight forward person. I am the first person to tell you that I am a bitch. I have never been shy about that. A lot of people like to say different and if they want to think I'm nice/kind then I love that for them, but I've never said it. I have hang ups and I like to play the wrong kind of games sometimes. I have BPD, once you cut out all the romanticized bullshit tiktik is currently spewing, there are toxic traits that flare if left unchecked.
Its work, having BPD is an on going chronic battle of managing symptoms, behaviors, and shitty coping mechanisms. Sometimes I don't treat people the best and I'm aware of that. That's why I've never claimed to be nice. I ask all of my friends to tell me if I'm being an asshole. If I'm behaving terribly. It's one of the first things I mention when I'm getting to know someone and starting a new friendship. I want you to bring shitty behaviors to my attention, I cant fix what I can't see. I figure anyone whos actually my friend will have no problem doing that. I used to be very cagy about my BPD, it has a bad rap and honestly its not for no reason. Undiagnosed BPD can cause a LOT of problems, we are not innocent little beans who just need a hug, left unchecked we have the self destructive force of a raging WILD FIRE. We burn bridges faster than most people can light a match.
Now I've come to accept that about myself. I know I can be toxic, I own that, I don't hide from it and pretend I'm a perfect little angel. It's taken me a LONG TIME to get to that point but god DAMNIT if I'm not proud of myself for getting here. Self acceptance has been hard and I'm sure theres a few people lined up ready to tell me I'm a liar, and the most toxic person in the rpc, and whatever else they slap on their banners to parade around in their protests- but honestly go ahead. Bc not everyone is going to like me and to be honest? I just don't give a fuck :)
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So yea. Three nice things. There you go.
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jormungandr-dot-jpg · 8 months
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tempus fugit.
Putting this under cut because I love art posts with just a quote djsjkaka I am also going to ramble
It’s finally done!!! This took less time than I thought but it still felt like a bit forever
Sorry to everyone who has no idea what tempus fugit is, it’s an rp in the rat hq tmc discord that I am going a bit insane about, where I play wild hunt au mark, who is the raven!
It uses a lot of animal metaphors so that’s what this is emulating, but I also gave them extra things like halos (?) and other things that are references to other metaphors, events in the story, or connect two characters
Also the space in the right bottom is for a character that doesn’t have a super specific metaphor just yet but it’s all good
Little easter eggs/explanations for the people who’ve read me going crazy:
- the wolf and the rabbit (fe!adam and fe!evelin) are the only ones with halos, which is because they are very intertwined characters and I like giving unique matching traits
- fe!adam’s halo is a whale, another metaphor that ties him to Jonah because of the Bible story of Jonah and the Whale, which is coming back to bite us rn
- fe!evelin has two halos, mostly because I couldn’t choose which one I liked better. The island is a known metaphor in the story, but the barbed wire is something I came up with to reference the sheepdog metaphor, as well as it just being fitting imo
- deer!adam has some extra metaphors of darkness and rot/mold, so I gave it some I guess like decay on its face? I’m prob gonna make a colored version and it will be more obvious then
- the sheep, og!sarah and og!jonah (left and right respectively) (they also might be mythic!sarah n jonah but I like saying og) are sewn together because they both died at the hands of fe!adam when he had the deer moment. They also have the same lamb metaphor because of that. Jonah has a flower in his mouth because of his flower things, but Sarah was only around briefly and didn’t get to develop many metaphors so sadly she has nothing
- the kitty is ks!adam, who I am very excited to see again when we get out of the fuckin mirror reality. He has a big notch in his ear because he was absolutely fucked up by fe!adam and I wanted to channel that. I also always thought of him as a white cat, which I think is interesting.
- raven wh!mark!!! My beloved!! My guy!!! I’m very happy with him because I’ve always had trouble drawing birds. He is holding a bell to reference the poem The Bells by Poe (who is already an influence on his character) because of its lines that have big banshee vibes, which is what wh!mark is! I need to talk about wild hunt au on here so bad wow. The bell also has a feather attached because I use feathers a lot to enhance the raven metaphor
- as I said earlier, the empty space is for ks!sarah, who I will probably give an object to match with mark further because they are both gonna be birds! Very excited to put that in but no pressure doli :]
I think that’s all? I rambled a lot so if you got to the end have a star and a cookie ⭐️🍪
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