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#its just so stagnant
wispscribbles · 7 months
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Ghost who's gone prematurely grey due to his lovely past (and Soap who doesn't mind)
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caffeinatedopossum · 4 months
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I actually find it really bizarre and counter intuitive that clinically speaking, you cannot legally be diagnosed with a personality disorder until you're at least 18. The reason given for this is because "the personality has not fully developed before this age" like ???
Ah yes, my favorite strategy. Not diagnosing the problem until it's already been virtually cemented into your brain for life! Wouldn't it be easier (and more painless) to address the problem before it's fully developed?
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allgremlinart · 2 months
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I kind of sort atla episodes into "liberal fuckery" "neutral" and "decisively NOT liberal" and I feel like its kinda slept on how the Wan Shi Tong episode fits into that last category....
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dykedvonte · 26 days
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thinking abt what you said with house viewing Benny as a son and I’m obsessed. Like. The man spent most of his life before the war presumably alone, and then after the bombs fell he was alone again, save for AI he himself devised. Then he decides to pull in some Tribes, and one kid shows promise! So sure, treat him well, train him, groom him to be his protege, then next thing you know UH OH he’s got developing paternal feelings towards this guy. Wanting some semblance of a family when the time has long since passed, yet fostering that feeling all the same seems so accurate for him. Benny meanwhile only views him as a boss, and not a particularly good one at that. makes me wonder how House must’ve felt when he found out about Bennys plans
I view it as House blames only himself for this, cause he kind of does in canon (strap in this is a long one).
When reflecting on the issue of Benny, House chastises himself first and foremost for not acting quickly enough when it comes to priming Benny. He describes Benny as being ambitious, ruthless and capable; compliments coming from a man like House. House has an ego and while he is logical enough to understand there was never any evidence Benny saw him as a father-figure, he lacks the humility to admit he let his own views on his relationship with Benny blind him to the activities happening behind the scenes.
I doubt that House was as aware as he makes out about what Benny was doing, he knew early on but certainly not early enough to stop Benny from hacking and obtaining a securitron along with getting the chip in the first place. I take it he was distracted by all the possibilities he was calculating of Vegas' success and growth with him steering and Benny as the new figure head, not because of any normal affection for Benny but the admiration of his capabilities. It's to be noted that House believed menial incentives (likely caps, booze, basic needs, etc..) were enough to keep Benny tame like the other Chairmen but, as evidenced by the Omertas and Mortimer in the WGS, this is not enough when it comes to more driven Vegas citizens. This implies he still undervalued Benny and created a space in which Benny felt the need to rebel.
House in my eyes is not sentimental in the traditional sense. I can imagine his pride was severely scorned as someone he certainly deemed dumber than him was, albeit only for a little, able to out-gambit him. It would definitely hit home seeing how his brother also betrayed him but I feel like that's why he's so apathetic when he tells the Courier to do as they see fit with Benny. I doubt the way he terrorized his brother brought him any emotional satisfaction other than a "Now who's in charge!" ego boost. Putting that same emotional intensity towards Benny isn't worth it because who does it benefit? Wasted time, wasted planning, and most importantly wasted potential are all he gets from continuing to be hands-on with Benny. I say the closest example is not being able to throw out old toys due to the memories attached but knowing it's necessary as they are broken or just taking up space for new ones, and then asking someone else to do it so you don't need to get caught up in the feelings of throwing something you put so much effort into. It's not Benny House cares about in my mind, not in a way that sounds healthy to any non-emotionally constipated individual, but what he could've represented for him, which is why he so quickly offers the same position to the Courier.
As for Benny's view on all of this, it was a long time coming. Benny didn't and doesn't believe House is a completely shitty boss. He admires what he's been shown and admits House knows how to run the strip, but disagrees with the directions. Ideologically, House is an anarcho-capitalist while Benny is just an anarchist. House wants to run the strip to profit, though money is not what he's concerned with being rich with anymore. Benny wants a free state that he wishes to become a place for the people, except for the Chairmen who would be on top (I like to remind people that Benny's motives were selfish but not for personal gain/power as was it for the people he actually saw as family). Benny was never looking for a father but a future. He was not interested in being adopted, or having the chairmen adopted, as bigger names still overshadowed in House's legacy.
Truly, it's easiest to summarize as House feeling strongly and thinking positively enough of Benny to start incorporating him into the future of Vegas (a huge honor actually) while Benny was so disillusioned by House's ego and indifference that he thought the only way Vegas could be the future is with House gone.
#tdlr House saw Benny as the perfect face of his Legacy while Benny saw his legacy as a stagnant mosquito infested pond#its more complex as house certainly would of been irate if he hadn't known and the courier came to kick benny's ass#but more someone being mad youre fucking with their things#i likely thing that even in a more traditional father son relationship House is conditional and would force Benny to confrom more to his#standards as I also believe the Chairmen are more tightly monitered due to bennys unique relation to house and being the first tribe#so itd be smothering and oppressive for someone like Benny even though imposing his beliefs and standards would be how House shows affectio#and fatherly praise which would result in Benny probably wanting to act out even more. like the only way a father son dynamic is healthy an#works is if house would relent some control and show he sees benny as an equal which would never happen cause its house but its still tragi#to me cause house has that longing for something more personal to him than Vegas and tries to fill it with progress cause its rather hard#to create those bonds in the state he is in and benny was the closest thing to that and even that he inadvertently ruined#but on benny house kinda ruined him cause the chairmen for all intents and purposes liked and trusted benny as a leader after bingo who#benny really only killed because of the illusions of grandeur house put into a young impressionable mind and how bingo refused to hear him#not to absolve him of his wrongdoings and being a dick but benny didnt just attack bingo he challenged him and won and in the end while#nostalgic none of the chairmen choose to leave and go back to the old way which says something cause they can leave#this is long and honestly should a seperate post on benny cause i have thoughts on him and how more people need to add his all roads traits#to get a cohesive picture of how hed really act#benny gecko#benny fnv#fallout#fallout new vegas#robert edwin house#mr house fnv#mr house#ask#anon#sorry if this is confusing I have very indepth thoughts on all aspects and possibilites on how unhealthy and power inbalancey anything#with house would be but this is so interesting cause its oddly vulnerable for house of all people to disclose this to the courier
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dromaeo-sauridae · 8 months
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hii omg hiii here's an ask: are there any sea monsters or sea creatures in general that you've made for promethea? and if not (or if theyre not the focus at all) can I know more about pegasi then? They've got some rly cool shapes and I'm interested if youve got more on them :3
HIII hi hello :33 i do actually have a few sea creatures! i answered another ask about it a little while ago:
BUT i have some more and i'll take any excuse to talk about my beasts. first off a bit of backstory tho:
cassandra had a fairly recent worldwide extinction event (around 12-15 kya) that was pretty devastating to the various biospheres and almost caused the extinction of the human race as a whole. there used to be a LOT more megafauna and a lot more ancient species that simply couldn't hold on through everything that happened. hence why the only hexapodal sea life are whales and probably a few small things digging around somewhere. ANYWAY.
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whales! a few species of carnivorous whale that live around promethea, the most widespread being the striped whale and the dwarf whale. the striped whale lives in the northern ocean (off the coast of cadaver's domain) and hunts almost anything, including the coastal cliff dweller pegasi. dwarf whales are much smaller and hunt in pods, eating mostly fish. speaking of fish
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most of them look about like this! these are just two examples, and i used to have more art of them but i can't for the life of me find it, so this is all i have for now LOL. they're technically more closely related to cassandra's arthropod equivalents, but theyre kind of all their own weird thing. i love them.
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exghul · 11 days
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thinking.
#tbd.#hi! im here lurking!#i havent been writing for no other excuse than D.C Doesnt Know What To Do With My Son#ive been chewing on the insides of my brain figuring out simply where i want to take him next#i really cant rely on c.anon for ideas bc LOL! their stories for him suck rn#why is there robo!broose?#why is dami uber loyal to him?#why is r.as a genie attached to n.ika rn? oh right bc she can talk to dead ppl#but apparently cant talk abt it to her /not-developed-relationship/ bf ? about it?#or really anything ?#sighs i wish they'd get more development#like i like her as a character i think she's neat af - and they're doing . alright w dami's severe lack of affection#.... but THAT SAID-#how are we gonna go from kiss @ the end of rob 21 -> some allusion to Theyre Official by dami talking to broose -> present#present being ' theyre a thing !! look at that BOYF and GIRLF ' !!!#:| at least give me some suspense or something jfc#maybe i read too many romance novels lol this romance is DRY ! AF ! WHERES THE SPICE! !!! THE LONGING!!!!! THE PINING!!!!!#de.monfire wouldnt treat me like this#i digress#my point here today: dami's character is in a limbo and its frustrating#so im approaching it from the idea of / let me just uhh . rebuild him from ground 0 and see where the dice roll /#so i have thousands of words offline in hc dumps ...#but when i get to his timeline around 15- it goes stagnant. sure that's where i'd put his t.itans verse but also ?? the c.anon for it SUCKS#i'll only be pulling characters from it & the /idea/ of the plot is good#m.ara deserves more screentime#so does . m.aya.#sighs#dami isnt allowed to have female friends thanks d.c#scrubs my face#i need to give him a Direction and ik i'll be flooded w muse again
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risingsunresistance · 1 month
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big fan of whatever is happening on alpha rn
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ilynpilled · 1 year
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what do u think is jaime’s biggest flaw
oh he has a bunch
Biggest one: his fear of truly confronting things. his cowardice (the brave knight is deconstructed)
Arrogance is a given. His obsession with perception and his ego. His destructive dissociative tendencies and forced detachment. His self delusion and cynicism he uses to enable acts that his conscience knows are wrong. He also often falls into the trap of cynicism when he expects quick results and does not get them. When he makes choices to become better and people keep dehumanizing him and expect the worst from him he gets super frustrated and petty (less so atp, just compare his behavior to Brienne’s reaction when he gives her Oathkeeper and she misreads his intensions vs the gate not being opened for him in ADwD) His misogynistic and classist blindspots. Him weighing his values wrong even when his conscience is screaming at him (multiple examples of this, e.g Jeyne Poole: “her eyes were sad and wary”, “then why do you sound so frightened?”: vows from so many vows speech in conflict: obey your father vs protect the innocent. He obviously chooses wrong. George was telling us the way he changed by the end of ASoS is not enough he is not where he needs to be yet) His desperate want to make his “so many vows” compromise instead of making the correct choice and drawing the hard line he already did at 17. His desire to become Goldenhand the Just (just a mess frankly, gold tends to have negative symbolism in his story, his goldenhand also is associated with violence and is his desperate attempt to recreate his old self, his phantom fingers — again, has to be addressed in a dream.) While we are here also his need for his subconscious to literally repeatedly slap sense into him (his dreams addressing things he refuses to consciously address because it would hurt to do so). His tendency to repeat his father’s dogma when he is viscerally aware that that man is the worst man oat (Lannister sibling parallels! uwu!), unwittingly contradicting it in every way, then trying again. His desire to pursue glory as well as honor (and whatever they mean in the subtext) when the symbolism is very clearly established that the two cannot be achieved simultaneously for him, he cannot ride two horses at once. It might be that both get turn down at the end in some form. The honor related to the KG, and the glory related to duty to house Lannister. I think that conflict is getting picked apart right now with the choice he makes in ADwD to abandon his position/hunting down the brotherhood any kind of glory tying to house lannister pursuit etc to follow an injured and suspicious Brienne alone (mind you he was also riding Honor in that chapter, ntm the half moon). I think both honor and glory are very abstract and are rooted in some form in his desire for love as well (honor and glory paid their parts but in the end it was for cersei is something he reflects on) but “the things we do for love” has to be something not destructive and prejudiced. He is disillusioned by both honor and glory, especially after aerys. “What is honor?” A horse. Like deep down he knows. His arc in AFfC-ADwD was about about taking apart and looking at all of these flaws imo, put him in a spot to make his choice in adwd. and all that matters are choices. He is also an asshole.
#ask#jaime lannister#valyrianscrolls#this is another reason i love his arc so much bc changing is really not simple at all#to ​what and why you are changing has to be thoroughly examined#and all your flaws have to be brought to the surface#and also how our self concept plays into our choices and what altruism even means#or what becoming better even means#i also think ppl take vows a bit too literally like they also represent something more abstract in terms of his values#and he does this too like he fixates on it bc its easier to just be like yeah im just keeping this vow nothing else haha#like his self proclaimed ‘’im doing this for the bit’’ is so easy to pick apart#trying to keep that oath to a dead lady like#cat is dead. she couldnt be kicking piles of doodoo at him#like what’s he got to prove?#it is something deep rooted for him and him only#‘’let them see the cripple. i wont show them a golden lie’’ and the return to that ‘’one hand. only one. no golden one’’#alright then lets keep going anyway#when it comes to analysis of jaime the subtext is so important#the show whitewashed him and kept him stagnant#george explores his flaws and forces him to start addressing them#and constantly presents him with dichotomies#i hope then his trajectory will be now actually confronting his sins directly#the lady stoneheart confrontation will have to be a key pivot point#especially as per her symbolism as the monster that is the product of the lannister regime#and its her family that he caused the most harm to#his biggest sins relate to her
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crystalis · 11 months
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i feel sad about not belonging anywhere and being small/invisible and like.. idk who i am
i feel really regretful of my life but idk what to do or how to change anything
or i mean i know what i need to do but i feel like i cant or im too scared .. and lately ive been frustrated with myself bc ive been experiencing that "trapped inside my head" feeling really intensely where idk how to speak to articulate thoughts and it feels painful
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ghoul-haunted · 4 months
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anyway I'm soooo normal* about asscreed and I definitely dont constantly feel a sad sense of loss over how I'll likely never experience the same wild enthusiasm or passion for a franchise story like I did with asscreed, but god I am glad I was there for it's height because there was nothing else like it
*this is a lie
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someoldfires · 4 months
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an unexpected challenge when writing about vampires is that it is really difficult to describe people’s internal and external reactions to stimuli when those people do not have a heartbeat or need to breathe
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lavenderjewels · 1 year
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me ranting to myself in my head about how yuuji is a good character
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katyspersonal · 6 months
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wait, there are "enemy" blogs you want to stay in the fandom? isn't it better if they stay away, if they're annoying enough to be "enemies"?
Well, it is not a real """enemy""", hence why I used three whole pairs of quotation marks and not one x) And it is a singular, not plural.
The problem with BB fandom is that it is like... in a crisis? Not only the truly active part of it is like, same 20 people for years now, but also there is a hegemony of the same characters, same ships, same takes, same headcanons, same designs for unseen characters... People that join in the fandom see what fans are up to, but since most of the activity is the popular girls (gender neutral) of the school who are all tight mutuals group doing the thing of the week they share (usually when it happens you can blame a Discord server), these new people assume that this is what will fly, also that this is what is "canon". They're yet to discover that there are different interpretations, different possibilities, alternative ships..... but they now will not, because they already got swayed by influence. The cycle continues.
The """enemy""", that I only call such because we seriously didn't get along as people and not because they did something bad, is very different though! They are not annoying! They appear to be an individualist, they are touching ideas and characters fandom practically abandoned, they draw what THEY like and not what is a current set fun trend, they do not try to throw a bone to the community-
It is just refreshing to see something unique and interesting! I am the type that actually goes insane if I have to see the same thing over and over. I'd start hating my favorite ships if I never could see alternatives, ffs! My idea of ideal small fandom is various individuals doing cool stuff and simply sharing with each other, rather than there being a "core" that sets the trends and everyone outside of these trends being passively-aggressively ignored for "wrong" takes, "wrong" ships or "characters no one will care about". There should be more users that radiate such strong individuality and creativity instead of resorting to being just another gear in the machine! I would not be as petty as to wish for someone actually interesting to leave the fandom over personal things. My real enemies, on the other hand, are not creative at all. Well, one of them used to be but completely lost the spark.
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wait @alvodra @haveyoueverconsideredpiracy i promised an update on my hair didn't i?
well. it's off. about 1mm of hair remains and it feels very weird and every time i happen to pass a reflecting surface i just. freeze and stare for a solid ten secodns at least. it looks good tho, if not really like Me (and not just bc i'm not used to it, even when the mohawk was new and weird it felt like me)
i hardly got any reactions somehow too lmao. my mum tho, she came in and was smiling and i could see her face fall it was hilarious. so far both of my parents have called me sinead independently.
soooo. head is shaved. i'm not completely certain what to think of it. it's not bad, it is kinda cool, but i also hope it grows out fast enough. then comes the dye and spiked hair (eventually)! that's probably gonna be more Me again lmao
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doodlboy · 6 months
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Got bored & roughed out what d!El's bloodbath would look like
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legionofpotatoes · 1 year
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man post-andor star wars feels so embarrassing
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