#it's disappointing that it ended like this. it hurts
I'm having a bit of a rough time right now...
Out of nowhere, I got hit with some rough memories and pet issues during finals weeks and when all of my weekends are busy so I have no time to cool down.
Starting with the rough memories, back in January or December we had to take my 13 (or 14 we don't know) year old dog to the vet. She has a growth on the inside of her nose that was bothering her. And we were told that it was either a) nothing, just a normal cyst from old age that may clog one of her nostrils completely, or b) cancer that would most likely kill her in 6 months.
6 months is June. That much I remember. And I said she's 13 or 14, so she's already elderly and starting to have health problems. And if it is cancer, it's not painful or decreasing her quality of life. She'll be fine until she's just not one day. That, on top of it would take a $1000-2000 surgery that would take off half her nose and decrease her quality of life to remove it to even know for certain it was cancer, and even then that might not be all of it, my family made the decision that we weren't gonna do it.
So I got hit with that memory I'd pushed to the back of my mind a couple days ago because guess what, it's only 2 weeks until June.
And today, we took my cat into the vet. My namesake. He's had kidney stones for over a year now, and he hasn't gotten better. We've done everything we could, multiple vet visits, prescription food, no treats except the ones designed to reduce kidney stones, etc. He's been feeling kinda bad the last few days and it's been a couple months since his last visit so the vet wanted to see if he was getting any better.
No, he's not. His kidney stones are larger now and all the dieting and stuff has done nothing as far as the vet can tell. So now the kidney stones are large enough that he needs surgery.
Guess when? June. He's scheduled to go in for surgery in late June, right after my family gets back from our vacation that was scheduled months and months ago. The vet said it won't matter that it'll be a couple weeks later because he's already been sick for over a year. But I was there at the vet when we found that out today.
And on top of that, I've been fairly busy non stop for a good 2-3 weeks, including during the weekends, and will continue to be so until the end of school. So I've had pretty much no time to just sit and relax.
I'm leaving for a camp the first weekend after school's out for a week, and before I go I have to pack and clean and set up care instructions for my lizard.
Basically I just got super busy and will be busy until I'll be gone at a camp and then when I'm back my cat will get surgery and oh yeah my dog might die from cancer in that time and on top of that I'm starting to slip on my school work I've tried so hard to stay on top of these last couple months. And it's finals.
Fun times. I'm doing absolutely lovely thanks.
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“Currently” Tag game
tagged by @softeberrie thank you!
five songs you’ve been listening to on repeat recently?
I actually haven’t been listening to music recently. I always have videos playing when I’m at home and I listen to podcasts when I go out (which is almost never these days). I really like A Hot Dog Is A Sandwich (Mythical Kitchen) and Psychology in Seattle because Dr Kirk’s voice soothes my soul.
last movie you watched?
I rewatched Palm Springs a couple of weeks ago, one of my favourite movies ever.
A lot of Youtube during the day and rewatching Grey’s Anatomy kinda backwards at night. (I first started at s13 and up, and now I’m doing 11 and up, and then I’ll keep going backwards. I have watched the first 10 seasons much more often than the latest ones so I’m trying to make up for it.) I’ve also been watching Santa Clarita Diet to calm down when Grey’s Anatomy pisses me off.
I started a Stephen King book last summer and I still haven’t finished it. I usually like to read on the bus but I haven’t taken the bus since last year, so...
tagging: @an0nymousghost @villereals @void-imp @thesim-tea
Feel free to ignore if you’ve already done it of course :)
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I’ve seen the drama circulating and I don’t necessarily want to get into it, but I have thoughts and I want to say them.
So yes, Tom signed on for a new role. One where he is also an executive producer. A move he has talked about wanting to make.
It’s another dark role. It deals with another sensitive subject (mental illness). I, myself, have suffered with a few mental illnesses so I know how it feels to have them portrayed stereotypically in media.
But my issue isn’t with any of that.
My issue is with many people’s assumptions and reactions.
Would we love to see him in something lighter? Sure. But it’s not our career. It’s his. We aren’t the ones that would be going to work everyday. He is. If he likes acting in darker roles then let him. If he wants to move in this direction, let him. He doesn’t act to make anyone happy. He does it because he loves it. And if he isn’t interested in doing certain roles then he doesn’t owe it to anyone to do them.
Here’s the thing: The series isn’t even out yet. We don’t know what it’ll be like. Again, I fully understand the frustration when mental illness is portrayed inaccurately in media- but we don’t know that it will be! It hasn’t been be filmed! Tom has said he wants to work with more mental health charities and Harry has talked about dealing with mental health, so I’m hoping he will understand the importance, take the time and care and do the research for this role. Look at his past roles, he has a history of doing the research and learning about the subject. Especially as an exec. producer he has the opportunity to have more of a say to make it better. And maybe it won’t be- maybe it’ll be like many others. But automatically jumping to that conclusion isn’t supporting him and his craft. If you trust him as an actor then trust that he will take care and give it his best.
Also, you don’t have to support him by watching his work. Especially if it’s triggering to you or not something you’re interested in. But trashing or canceling him for a role he is excited about (that comes with an exec. producer title - which is the direction he is aiming to go in - so I can only assume he is thrilled about this piece of the project) is not being a fan. I can’t imagine how it would’ve felt if he was buzzing about this project (which he knows the details of - we don’t) and then he sees his own fans tearing it down.
And don’t get me started on the meme. Again, if Tom likes playing “problematic characters” then let him. Many actors find a niche in darker roles. I love writing that theme, but it’s often looked down upon. But to call someone with a mental illness “problematic” is demoralizing and stigmatizing and a part of the problem. And further, I’m assuming there’s a reference to Cherry and calling a war vet with PTSD that becomes an addict “problematic” is so hurtful to those going through that. Not to mention that both of these roles are based on real people.
It’s his career - not yours. It’s his choice in the roles he picks - not yours. It’s his daily life - not yours.
The series isn’t even out yet. So stop it with the assumptions and judgements at least until it’s out.
You don’t have to be a fan. But if you’re going to be then rethink what it means. It doesn’t mean you’re forced to watch everything he’s in. But fans aren’t supposed to tear down either.
If you want to watch a romcom then watch a romcom. Tom doesn’t have to be in it.
And PLEASE, be delicate when it comes to discussing the characters and mental health as he navigates these roles.
Also! I am very aware this isn’t all of the fandom.. and to the amazing fans here’s a kiss from Tom and I! 😘😘