#it's honestly such a shitty policy | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

medicinemane · 3 months

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I get very tired of dealing with people who are so busy being "practical" that they're just totally prescriptive

I tend to be, I think, a fairly pragmatic person. Like most years I spend about... maybe $50 on myself for the whole year (this year is going to be a bit higher, but there's also specific utility to what I'm spending it on). I tend to not bother buying myself snacks, cause I know I'm mostly hungry, and if I'm hungry real food is a better deal (I sadly tend to fail to get ahold of the real food either)

My point is that I tend to be very goal oriented (not in a ladder climbing way, in a I set goals and then work towards them kinda way), I tend to be very focused on what will push my situations into being sustainable, I tend to look for high efficiency, low cost, long term solutions

I was... I was talking to that friend I'll say is Dr Jekyll and Mr Dumbass (I was more trying to talk to my dad, but they were both there). It was definitely Mr Dumbass today

For one thing, he was already saying a bunch of really fucking dumb shit where... it's so stupid I'm not even going to repeat it, where it's like the answer for why we don't do that is because it's obviously a moronically stupid idea on top of being immoral, and also totally ineffective you dipshit

So I already wasn't in the mood for him

Then, while talking about visiting my grandma, I mention how in order to start cooking I need sharp knives, none of my knives are sharp (cause my mom's a fool and dulls them all), and how it would really help if I could just take a knife from my grandma since she doesn't cook anymore and just... keep it as my personal knife that I keep sharp

(I can't do this, cause my grandma is... bug fuck crazy, and legit believes that if you gift someone a knife they'll kill people with it which like... where do you even get that idea, like she has literally said before that she'd give money to buy a knife but wouldn't give one as a gift... what?)

Anyway, Mr Dumbass starts going on about how I can just buy a new knife, and it's like no... in your quest for objective practicality you've lost all pragmatism

I don't need to buy a new knife, I need to learn to sharpen knives which... which I just have a bit of a block on cause I've had trouble figuring out how to sharpen stuff so far (I've come to suspect that which of the hard and soft stones you use first and second isn't intuitive and I've been trying to hone with the sharpening stone and sharpen with the honing stone)

Like... to get mean for just a slight moment, shut your fool mouth, you've got more money than I've ever even touched, and while you were poor at one point when you were younger you've clearly forgot, and not everyone can just buy stuff

Also you're saying a bunch of dumb shit tonight with such confidence and it's pissed me off

He's capable of being a very very smart and compassionate person, and then other times he's a damn fool, and far too often he... he talks about practicality without actually understanding how to be practical

Being practical requires working in the confines of reality

...I don't know, I don't think I have all the words I need to explain what I'm saying, but the point is he's annoyed me and people who act like him annoy me where it's like... nothing matters in the end other than if you actually solve something

You can talk all day about what someone "should do", but what matters is what they will do

So it gets frustrating talking with my family with him cause he has all this ideas where it's like... that functionally won't work, and like some of his great ideas are how I can just wait for my grandma to die and get the knife then and it's like... yeah... but I need a knife now dummy, and I have knives, and which is more useful?

Dropping a pretty penny on a new knife, or finishing learning a skill I really fucking need badly and that makes it so I can sharpen things for next to free forever?

...I'm just tired of having to do everything myself and getting no help, that's all. How about you shut your fucking mouth, stop trying to offer advice that's worse than my plans I'm already slowly turning the gears on making happen, and just let me bitch about my idiot relatives?

Laughing at this fool antics when he chooses to do that, legitimately is more helpful than any attempts to help

#last two paragraphs are things that sadly a lot of people could learn #sometimes you need to shut your mouth and just listen #and this is why I have my no advice without action policy #if the rolls were reversed; I'm not willing to suggest someone buy a knife unless I'm willing to pay for it #most I'll ever do is something like say 'Just wondering if this is something you've already tried'#like know someone who go hacked here; and I just asked if they're running two factor authentication now cause if not it might help #like that's the outside amount of advice I'm willing to offer without action #because it acknowledges that they may have already thought of it; and it more just tries to float an option than it does suggest shit #honestly... I think I'd be less annoyed if it was like 'what about buying a new knife?; rather than 'you should buy a new knife'#advice in the form of a question makes for a dialogue rather than dictation #lets the other person just explain why something won't work if they've already considered it #like in this case... money; way rather just sharpen shit and get to spend money on food instead of a knife #like... this is the crux of what I complain about with my grandma; that groceries are my number one desire with money #are you my grandma? suggesting that I just flippantly spend money once it becomes something you'd want to spend it on?#...and the answer honestly is that yeah that's usually how people are #they can laugh off wasting money on shitty over priced clothes; but when it's what they like spending on that's what everyone should do #...maybe I fail at it; but I try not to do that #try to just be a back up to people and support them in whatever matters to them #and once again; only offer advice when I'm actually willing to do something like drop the money on getting them the thing I think they need #eh... I don't want to share the other dumb shit he was saying cause... dear god #edgy stoned dipshit talk; you know?#framed as actionable policy #good guy; helped me move shit up (I mostly needed a driver) but... utter fucking ass too much of the time #there's reasons we're not closer

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rottingcompost · 2 years

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applying for more jobs and one of them had as an actual step in the applying process being to like/follow their social media pages and i have never seen a bigger turn-off for a job ever in my life, and the weirdest policy i have seen in all my time of looking for a job.

#ramblings #honestly HAVING to like or follow their social media is probably one of the worse ones i have seen too #and i have seen some SHITTY policies and recruitment tactics while job hunting #its up there with the whole lying about the job description and then when you start working they dump stuff on you that you NEVER agreed to #like the whole 'you dont HAVE to sell at this job its just a nice little bonus' and then having a quota for the least ammount of sales #and then firing people who dont sell enough when it was never even stated that selling was a mandatory thing

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eowyntheavenger · 1 month

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Hi! I saw your post on telling Americans to vote, and I was wondering what you think of posts from people from other parts of the world who are calling Americans evil for voting for Biden because of his support for Israel. I've seen a few already. They seem to be completely convinced that Americans deliberately voted for Biden specifically to side against Palestine and no other reason, and spread the general (pretty ignorant and hateful) message of "Americans are evil because of the actions of their government and because they collectively refuse to vote for a president who is good and not simply 'the lesser of two evils'". It frustrates me because they seem to think they're experts on US politics, culture, and society and have all the answers, but it also makes me concerned because it reminds me of the whole Russian bot thing from last time. Like, I'm 99% sure the people reblogging these posts aren't Russian bots (don't know about the OPs though), and they unquestioningly believe this. What do you think of this and how would you go about addressing this issue? Do you think it's possible to get them to understand how little they actually know about the US and how they're actually promoting a message that makes things worse for everyone? I've also seen less scathing posts that are just disheartened and don't seem to believe the democrats are truly better to vote for than the republicans and so it's just two sides of the same coin. To be fair, I think that sort of feeling is only further encouraged because there didn't really seem to be much if any progress made with Biden, not even back to square one after Trump moved the country so far backwards. I think most Americans really wish the elections actually had good candidates and they could pick the best of two goods, but are frustrated and stuck with the current system and don't know how to actually get to the point where there are good candidates. (Though personally I think voting for the one who isn't actively trying to make themselves a king with unlimited terms is a decent start. I can understand the frustration though.)

Hi! Thanks for the ask. This stuff worries me too. I've gotten comments on my posts like that too, telling me/other Americans that we're evil for voting for Biden.

But I've seen a much larger number of comments and posts from people outside the United States BEGGING us to vote for Biden. I literally get tags like that on my posts EVERY DAY urging Americans to vote blue. So I think that's valuable context, even if it doesn't solve the problem of the "I hate everybody who votes for Biden" crowd.

And yes, it's definitely a shitty argument on their part to claim that people voting for Biden are specifically siding against Palestine. Literally every single person I know in real life and online who plans to vote for Biden has been criticizing and protesting his policies on Palestine.

In terms of convincing the anti-voters that they're wrong, honestly, I don't know. They don't listen to reason and they seem intent on spreading despair. Some of Biden's policies have been terrible (Willow oil-drilling project), some of them have been downright evil (military aid to Israel), but I'm a rational person and I know that Trump is worse in every respect.

I've tried debating them. It's been pointless every time. They genuinely don't know how the government works, which scares me. Common takes include: 1) a genuine lack of awareness of how pro-Israel Trump and the right wing are, combined with magical thinking that a virtually unknown third party candidate can win the presidential election, 2) truly impressive mental gymnastics blaming Biden for the overturn of Roe v. Wade, and 3) continuing the mental gymnastics to blame Biden and the Democrats for anti-trans policies...

I guess my advice is to either ignore them and move on, or debunk things when you have time/energy? It's easier said than done, I know. There's nothing more annoying than someone being stupid on the internet, especially when they accuse you of stuff that just isn't true, and especially when they're spreading dangerous misinformation or voter-suppression rhetoric.

Like you, I'm highly suspicious of anyone who advocates AGAINST voting, or against voting blue. And I agree, many of these people are not bots, like you said, but I call them useful idiots, because they're doing the bots' work for them.

The one thing you said that I'm going to push back on is "there didn't really seem to be much if any progress made with Biden." Biden's actually made lots of progress on a variety of issues, and reversed some of Trump’s damage, it just doesn't get a lot of fanfare and it’s unfortunately happening at the same time as Republican gains in state legislatures and while they control the Supreme Court. But Biden and his administration have:

• invested billions in green architecture and clean energy, including making sure federal investments benefit low-income communities

• introduced new fines for companies' methane emissions

• introduced a plan to cut the federal government's greenhouse gas emissions by 65% by 2030 (that includes the military, which is a huge emitter)

• passed a huge bill for improving the country's infrastructure, including bridges, roads, broadband and more

• introduced first-ever national strategy on gender equality and equity and pushed Congress to pass the Equal Rights Amendment

• fought for women's reproductive rights after the overturn of Roe v. Wade

• put more women, people of color, and women of color on the federal bench than any of his predecessors combined

• nominated Kentaji Brown Jackson as the first Black woman to serve on the Supreme Court

• boosted funding to historically Black colleges

• ordered the DOJ to end the use of private prisons by the federal government

• pardoned thousands of people convicted on federal marijuana charges

• created a White House office of gun violence prevention

• passed the Respect for Marriage Act, guaranteeing federal rights and benefits for same-sex couples

• rolled out a series of actions to protect the rights and safety of the LGBTQ+ community, including protecting queer and trans foster youth, improving access to mental health services, and addressing the rise in hate crimes

• challenged discriminatory state bans against gender-affirming care and trans athletes

• called to support trans youth in State of the Union address and restored the White House tradition of recognizing Pride Month

• changed passport rules so that people can obtain a passport with no gender marker

• examined efforts by each federal agency to advance LGBTQ+ rights around the world

• reversed Trump's transgender military ban

• protected the rights of incarcerated trans people

• forgave billions in student debt, repeatedly, and introduced penalties for college programs that trap students in debt

• slashed bank overdraft fees

• expanded guaranteed overtime pay for millions of people

• made union-busting harder

• prevented discriminatory mortgage lending

• made efforts to expand the child tax credit, which could lift hundreds of thousands of children out of poverty

• cracked down on agriculture monopolies to support farmers and small businesses

• made it so the government is going to start taking drug companies' patents away if they don't make affordable drugs

• made over-the-counter birth control pills available for the first time

• lowered the cost of hearing aids and expanded access to them

• spent millions of dollars on students' mental health

• reversed discriminatory healthcare rules

• reinvigorated cancer research

• announced plans to replace all leaded pipes in the next ten years as well as combatting lead exposure abroad

• changed rules for how people can get aid after disasters so they can get more protection and immediate payments more easily

• introduced new data privacy rules protecting people from tech companies

• pushed the federal government to monitor AI risks

• maintained steadfast support for Ukraine in the face of Russian aggression

• maintained steadfast support for Taiwan in the face of Chinese intimidation

• strengthened ties with allies in Asia and the Pacific Islands

• pledged climate change assistance to low-lying Pacific Island countries

• literally IMMEDIATELY after being elected, Biden fortified DACA, rejoined the Paris Agreement, and ended Trump's discriminatory "Muslim ban", ended the Keystone XL Pipeline and fossil duel development in wildlife monuments, (same as last link) rejoined the WHO, strengthened COVID-19 response measures on a variety of fronts, re-included non-citizens in the U.S. census, and passed executives orders on racial equity in the federal government

And I'm sure there's more I left out.

There are also things Biden does that literally don’t make the news, but matter a lot, like funding the Postal Service, and continuing to have a State Department so we can conduct overseas diplomacy (Trump tried to defund the USPS and wants to purge the State Department and fill it with loyalists).

#asks #US politics #Biden administration #I'm planning to make an even more comprehensive post at some point #my post

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keelanrosa · 17 days

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possibly a wildly out-of-touch opinion but shit like "vote blue no matter who" should apply to like. the president. not every single political race in america.

("okay but the phrase is 'no matter who' --" yeah because it became popular during the 2016 election when we had about twenty people in the Democratic primaries, the "who" was Biden or Yang or Williamson even if you prefered Sanders, not the bluest candidate for the local school board.)

all the "ohh, you think voting blue will help? Democrats are just as bad!" bullshit is completely inapplicable for races where a third-party actually has a chance in hell of winning and people should already be taking ten minutes to Google policies instead of treating voting like rooting for a favorite sports team

(also just plain bullshit anyway but that's a whole other topic.)

on the flip side the presidential elections are so fundamentally broken i'm honestly not sure a third-party candidate legally can win. we sure as shit don't elect our presidents based on who gets the most votes and electors are generally already dedicated to a specific candidate. so shitty as it is, it's a binary choice until the system is completely revamped on a level which will take years and quite possibly decades under the best of circumstances, and it's not exactly gonna speed up if the president is openly and actively trying to create a dictatorship in the most literal 'appointing Supreme Court judges he thinks will help overturn elections' sense of the word.

#us politics

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am-i-the-asshole-official · 4 months

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WIBTA if I withheld a job from my ex?

cw: maybe abuse?

My ex (28f) and I (24f) broke up two years ago. we're on decent terms, but I moved cross-continent and we don't talk often but are on good terms. every few months we chat and catch up. I don't think she's a bad person and have no ill-will towards her.

we got together when I was 19 and she was 24, which makes me feel weird now as a 24 year old, esp considering I was homeless and recently exiting a sex trafficking situation. I'm physically disabled- she had a physical government career (think military, first responder, etc) and had a good amount of muscle on me as a result. our relationship centered around substance abuse a Lot, and she did shove me, push me, etc. the worst thing she did was break my arm when I was trying to get her to eat when she was really drunk because I was worried about alcohol poisoning. I'm an addict tbf, but I didn't put my hands on her- I was awful, I'd leave for days after we fought and scare her, and that's not okay. I want to clarify that I'm also shitty in this scenario- I'd leave, I'd call her mean names, and not pick up the phone. overall, it was a toxic relationship on both our ends.

she left her government job, and I have gotten her a job since our breakup in the nonprofit work I do. The company I recommended her to operates hundreds of miles away from me, and so I wasn't worried about running into her, despite it being the same niche area of nonprofits. People there were uncomfortable once they found out she was my ex, because they were concerned about me when we were together, but she did well and genuinely helped out a really hard-up charity.

Recently, we've caught up- I never plan to get back with her, because someone breaking your arm is bad and I recognize that. My friends rightfully disapprove of us talking, but I needed some copies of vet records for my cat she had, and she asked if I knew anyone hiring. I am successful in my career and hold sway in the field I work in. I have worked at this one company I absolutely love working for, like I'm at my dream job, and I don't think it'd be appropriate to recommend her to apply. I am higher up now, and they would let me refuse to supervise her due to conflict of interest, but I just don't want her at the company. She's great at her job and would be a massive asset, esp bc it's a nonprofit and we struggle to find decent staff, but it'd freak out my work friends, she'd come into a similar environment as the last recommendation I gave, and I honestly just want to focus on my career without dealing with the stress of having her around, even though we're friends now, she still scares me a little.

So I told her to apply at companies I have a good reputation with but do not plan to work with again. It's basically the same job, same pay, as she would get if I offered her a job where I'm at, but my company has better policy and is more understanding. we're so understaffed in my field that people recommending friends, family, exes, whatever, to apply is normal and, frankly, appreciated, as long as they aren't working with them directly. I would be able to put her in an office on the other side of the country and never have to talk to her w work, but I just. Don't want her at this company, even though she'd help a ton and it's slightly better than the other jobs I've set her up with. She doesn't know I'm holding out, but AITA?

What are these acronyms?

#aita #am i the asshole

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swangtup6 · 1 month

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Demo Review: Fenriz - A Funeral of Light (1996)

Ok so there's like no info on this band online that I've found, I have a policy of not reviewing NSBM (for the record) and the Polish scene (where this band comes from) is a minefield of sketchy politics but as far as I know they're clean. If im wrong abt this lmk n ill look further into it. all ik is that this demo goes hard as fuck

The first thing I want to talk about is the production, actually. This is DEFINITELY raw black metal. Everything sounds muffled, like it was recorded under water, you can barely hear the snare drum, you can't hear the cymbals at all, and the vocals are completely drowned out by everything else. All in all, it's lovely. I think the minimalistic sound makes for pretty perfect kvlt black metal, and this band is a huge inspiration for my own project, actually.

Next up has to be the guitar work. The guitar playing on this demo is phenomenal, with plenty of menacing riffs, eerie melodies, etc etc. I think the production serves the guitar particularly well as it gives it a kinda otherworldly feeling (like on Burzum's first demo) and the minimalistic songwriting let's the guitars stand out as the driving force behind this demo.

The drums are the only other instrument audible, so we're gonna talk about them next because we have to. The drumming is great, whoever drummed on this (metal archives says all of the instruments were played by one person named Thorn) can play with the best of them in this genre. The drumming is written well too, with plenty of blasts and a healthy dose of slower bits. It all feels natural and fluid, and only being able to hear the kick and the lower freqs of the snare drums is honestly a pretty cool effect. It's like the drum production on Transylvanian Hunger turned up to 11, with only the pieces of the kit absolutely necessary to get the rhythms audible.

The vocals are also fantastic. Thorn utilizes a somewhat-pained sounding high rasp that sounds totally sick and manages to cut through the thick guitar pretty easily. It almost sounds like the vocals are sitting on top of the instruments but in a cool way not a shitty production way.

Overall, this is one of my favorite black metal demos ever. I'm not going to give it as high of a rating as I think it deserves because I have to stick to my principles on how I rate these things or I'll rate everything 10/10, but it's easily like a 9/10 in my heart. I wouldn't recommend this to a newcomer to the genre, I don't think it's an essential listen even for experienced black metal fans, but it has a special place in my heart for being ridiculously raw, well played, well written, and all around dope as hell.

7/10

standout track: The Blaze Mountain

youtube

#youtube #music #music review #metal review #metal music #dungeon synth #black metal

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whumptober · 8 months

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Sorry to bother (and sorry if I come across as hostile, this is very /nm) but I'm confused about the AI policy. You guys rightfully point out that feeding another person's work into an AI and posting the result will be disallowed because it's theft. But other AI works will be allowed, even though every single AI that's currently publicly available to people is trained on works (art or writing) that are scrapped without the creator's consent. Even AI that people use to just 'enhance a work' as you guys put it, does so by comparing said work to the scrapped pieces the AI was trained on. Which were stolen.

So what you're basically saying is people aren't allowed to steal themselves, but they're allowed to use a tool made from stolen works? Where's the sense in that?

I'm honestly very disappointed. In the past year, fancreators (and creators in general) have needed to jump through increasingly tight hoops to keep their work from being fed to AI against their will, and it still happens a lot. And now there's this big event that is supposed to stand in solidarity and be /for/ creators, and you're going to allow people to use a tool that in its current structure is inherently amoral and exploitive of other creators?

Why make the decision to not reblog it, but still allow it in the event/tag/collection on AO3? Why not say it's not allowed at all and block everybody who does put it in the tags? I /gen do not get why. You say it's nuanced but I do not get what's nuanced about "every AI currently available is trained on scrapped works"?

I've been participating in Whumptober every single year since 2015 and I'm very sad that if this is the mod's decision I will not feel safe as a writer to participate this year, knowing people in the tag/collection are allowed to post works that involve AI. I really just want clarification as to what is the 'nuance' that led to this decision???

AI tools are used in visual art to create effects, backgrounds, and other enhancements, so to say we're banning AI is like saying we're banning use of Photoshop. AI is used for the predictive text and spellchecker that's running while I type this reply. Accessibility tools rely on AI. People train their own bots on their own works to produce conversations with characters or role play a situation before writing prose. These are all legitimate uses of AI tools that we feel allow inclusivity to this event.

The mods cannot and will not police every single posted work for AI involvement. You don't have to post your work to be a participant. You don't have to prove you created 31 fanworks in October. You don't have to include your work in AO3 collections, or tag it, or strictly follow the prompts, or anything really. This isn't a contest and there aren't cash prizes. This event is about challenging oneself and being part of a community of fans all doing a fun fan thing together across different fandoms.

This mod is an English teacher and LOATHES ChatGPT as cheating. I agree with you that bots are trained by unscrupulous people scraping text without permission and it's shitty behavior. But we can't stop that, nor can we undo damage already done, and banning AI use (especially since we can't enforce it) is an empty stand on a hill that's already burning, at least in our view of things. And it alienates those who use AI tools for accessibility or any of the reasons cited above.

Once again, you do not have to post anywhere to participate. If you're worried about scraping and you don't want to lock your work, don't post it. It's always been the case that if you post something on the internet it can be used by others in ways you neither intend nor condone. It sucks that people are like that, and you have to do what makes you feel safe and comfortable, and that's OK.

If this stance is disappointing, we're sorry you feel that way. If you have a policy that is effective and still inclusive to all participants, we're happy to hear it.

#mod yenn #asks

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widthofmytongue · 1 year

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The other night I had drinks with coworkers. I increasingly dislike all of them. The topic of the Coronation came up, unsurprisingly. One of my colleagues said ‘we should have done what the French did’, and me and one other kinda went ‘haha yeah!’ and I thought for a moment that maybe I wouldn’t be in the political minority, even if these people will never be dedicated to the pursuit of global communism. My boss said, unironically, ‘what did the French do?’

Now I knew this was a bad sign, but me and person who initially referenced the French Revolution tried to sort of extol a few key details of the abolition of monarchy and formation of the First Republic, with probably disproportionate attention on the Terror. But anyway, my boss said something like ‘my knowledge of history isn’t great before the war’, and I asked genuinely ‘which war?’, which was interpreted as a sarcastic joke.

Anyway, this led to talking about WWII. Someone said something like ‘well the Second World War was unique among wars because it was essentially good versus evil’, to which I interjected ‘well kinda more like evil versus evil, right’. The response to this, from all three of my colleagues in the conversation, was ‘oh right, the Soviets’. I think if you follow this blog (or especially my politcal sideblog) you may have encountered my generalised view of the Soviet Union. Keeping in mind that it was Gevurah ShebeHod (since most of my personal posts seem to mark some significant point on the Hebrew calendar), I tried to rein in my response, and just said ‘interesting that when I mention the evil superpowers of the Allies in WWII you say the Soviets but not Britain or America.’ So the following dialogue came out of this:

Colleague (with history degree): Well I don’t know much about Roosevelt’s policy or ideological allignment... Me: Well he kinda committed genocide against the Navajo. C(whd): ...Churchill may have been a shitty guy... Me: Well he kinda committed genocide against India and Palestine. C(whd): ...But Britain essentially had to go to war with the Nazis. Me: To safeguard their material interests though, right, not for the altruism of saving the brutalised people of Europe. C(whd): Well Britain didn’t have any interests in Poland. Me: Well I think upholding a status quo is a very strong material interest for imperial Europe, but I was really talking about North Africa and the Middle East. C(whd): But those regions weren’t threatened by Germany, but by Italy. Me: Do you honestly think Churchill or whoever was thinking in such a two-dimensional way as to see these powers in a vacuum? [I wish I’d said ‘I think they were pretty threatened by Britain too, and remain so.’] Colleague who’d followed silently: Well every government has done horrible things at some point. Me: And yet when I mentioned evil versus evil, you all glanced right past the genocidal empires of Britain and America to look at the Soviets. Boss (unironically): I didn’t think when I mentioned the war that we’d be talking so much about genocide.

Now I wanna leave this on a couple crucial points. One is that I am very overt about being Jewish. I mention observing religious festivals; I use lots of Yiddish and occasionally Hebrew phrases; I have a hamsa and a Star of David badge on my backpack, as well as on the jacket I was wearing that night (I also have a Lenin badge on the jacket). The idea that these three white English men entered this conversation about WWII with a Jew and then were surprised (it was very clear they were all surprised and uncomfortable) at the mention of genocide is baffling to me, but I think all too common. I didn’t even mention the Shoah (although I think I did eventually say something like ‘I don’t think invading other countries is the greatest evil for which Nazi Germany is remembered’).

At some point later in the conversation I said something like ‘for all the negative views abounding on the Soviet Union, speaking as a queer Jew, I think I’d have preferred to live there than in Britain at the time’, to which my colleague with the history degree replied ‘well I obviously can’t speak to that’. It was very clear that he meant he can’t speak to Jewish and I guess queer identity. Now this is not the first time I’ve encountered this, but I think it’s an important phenomenon to observe. I once said to another colleague ‘well, there are lots of people in this country who want me dead because I’m Jewish or nonbinary’, and she said ‘well I can’t even imagine what that’s like’.

What I want to rhetorically ask is: why can’t you imagine it? Why do you imagine you’re safe from these same people? First they came for the communists, then they came for the Jews, then they came for that guy who wrote the poem! Eventually they’ll come for you too, when they drum up some new group to hate and mobilise against. If you can’t imagine what it’s like for fascists to want you dead, maybe you should try?

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theliterarywolf · 9 months

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There is a lawsuit that's been filed against Google over the AI scraping and related policy change: Case 3:23-cv-03440-LB.

Google is claiming more or less they're allowed to use whatever public data. However, to take a quote from the CNN article;

"“Google needs to understand that ‘publicly available’ has never meant free to use for any purpose,” Tim Giordano, one of the attorneys at Clarkson bringing the suit against Google, told CNN in an interview."

Which is something anyone who's ever gone over copyright and ethics knows regarding content.

Honestly this is a huge mess and Google is once again showing how shitty they are.

Hence why I hate that so many companies and institutions have Google Suite as their standard.

I remember when I took my 'Incorporating Current Technology Into Modern Classrooms' course (I don't remember what the actual title was) for my credential program and I saw all of the Google apps I would have to make accounts for/give my information to, I was just like

Because the notion of 'just because I use your service to type/to store data doesn't mean you have the right to profit off of those documents/data' shouldn't be that hard to understand...

But here we are.

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orowyrm · 1 year

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like the thing that i think a lot of ppl gloss over is that a large majority of the talon aligned heroes have little to no interest in the actual ‘goals’ of the organization (to the point where we still don’t entirely know what talon wants or why they exist, lmfao) so much as it just being a means to an end. like we can all conceptualize that sombra is pretty much just there because it gives her access to more resources she can use towards her own goals, moira is there for research opportunities and funding that she’d never get elsewhere due to the nature of her work, i can only imagine that ramattra’s alliance with talon (and thus null sector’s as a whole) is purely situational because it provides advantages he considers useful, reaper is pretty much just there because they’re against overwatch therefore he can use it as an avenue for his revenge, even doomfist doesn’t really seem to hold as much stock in talon as an organization as he does use his position as a tool to achieve his goals, if it stopped being useful he would likely just walk away.

in opposition to the overwatch aligned heroes who all seem to be coming together solely for the sake of this like, ideal of Overwatch as a concept being this paradigm of good and justice and doing what’s right, and rallying behind their faith in the organization and what it symbolizes… i genuinely don’t think any of the talon operatives really care all that much about talon at all. it’s just a job. like, sure, we’re doing cartoon supervillain shit, but the pay is decent and we’ve got benefits and i can continue to do my own thing on the side, no questions asked. it’s honestly a pretty sweet deal.

all of that to say i really don’t see why people seem so averse to the idea of sigma having that same mindset. like yeah, he’s not exactly thrilled to be using his research and abilities to assist in acts of violent terrorism, but does he have many other options? he says it himself in that interaction with baptiste, talon gives him everything he needs - funding, resources, something to fall back on after being in total isolation for decades and coming out with absolutely nothing. it’s a guaranteed safety net — so long as he’s with talon, there’s absolutely no chance of anyone dragging him off or locking him up again, and so long as he contributes when he’s needed, he’s free to pursue his research to his heart’s content. does he regret it? sure, sometimes. i think they all do. i doubt there’s a single talon-aligned hero who genuinely believes what they’re doing is genuinely morally correct and sound. but ultimately in his mind he didn’t have many options left, so he had to settle for something he knew would at least guarantee his safety and continued freedom. it doesn’t really mean he’s being manipulated or held against his will any moreso than most of the other talon heroes, imho. he’s not proud of it, but hey, it pays the bills.

i feel like he regards it with a similar level of resentment/annoyance as i felt towards my horrible soul sucking corporate retail job of several years - like don’t get me wrong, the company i worked for absolutely sucked and i HATED how they operated, policy was bullshit and so much of it was unnecessary and needlessly counterproductive. but i also really connected with my coworkers in the same situation AND i got to get paid to do stuff i already would have been doing on my own anyway, and ultimately the experience i got and connections i made were really helpful in pursuing what i actually wanted to be doing with my life. it’s like if your shitty day job required you to kill people but they also like, got you hooked up with a place to live and a healthcare provider and all that shit and paid for all of your living expenses no questions asked AND gave you a decent budget to screw around with so long as every now and then you showed them what you were making and maybe used it to kill people more efficiently sometimes. i wouldn’t exactly feel any amount of loyalty to the company paying me but i wouldn’t exactly be in a hurry to quit either

#overwatch #sigma #am i posting instead of going to bed. yeah. whatever. i think about it a lot #siebren de kuiper #fuck it. look at my posts boy

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yuki-the-gatekeepy · 2 months

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My last bi girlfriend barely ever even kissed me when we were alone, but was always all over me in public. And by that I mean progressive LGBT-ish settings where this would make her look cool, not places where you'd get so much as a mean side eye for seeming gay.

She called me her "girlfriend" officially in front of a bunch of her new friends she was trying to impress without ever having spoken about it privately with me. She talked endlessly about how gay she was (for things like... wearing converse chucks) in front of all her gay friends.

She never ended up actually having gay sex with me. When the relationship started to get more serious she quickly left me, hooked up with our male dance instructor and left the gay scene where she had been vying for everyone's attention to hang off a tall, masculine man's arm and giggle in her cute dress. In the kinds of places where we didn't used to go dancing, because they have a strict "men lead, women follow" policy for ballroom dancing.

Lesbians do not have this option like bisexual women do. This isn't some piece of theater or an interesting hobby to me that I could drop at any time. I'm actually gay! Yes yes not all bi women are as shitty as my ex girlfriend, duh, but the principle still applies. Our situations are not the same.

Honestly...I 100% agree I completely hate it when these kinds of bi women do this so openly. It's either that or like.."oh I'll ONLY fuck you, but if you want a girlfriend, too bad I only wanna date men" be for real.

There's a special place in both of those situations where I can place my disdain for all of this. We HAVE to speak about this at the same time we talk about how bi women shouldn't simply be persecuted for being bi. These things aren't exactly exclusive topics and I stand by that. I stand especially firmer with lesbians since ofc I am one myself who went through this. Thanks a whole lot :D

#lesbian supreme #autism supreme #answering the stuff #homophobia #actual lesbian dating #ive also felt of all of this and experienced with my bi friends

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cringecannon · 22 days

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ohoohho you're back!!! been backreading everything <3

anyway pls give more dominant gortash. brat-tamer (more like breaker) gortash my beloved

As an advisor for the Grand Duke, you had a front row seat to the weasel's whole shitty charade. You never made a true stand against him because you didn't have a death wish, but you were as verbally repulsed as you could get away with. Honestly, you weren't entirely sure why he hadn't forced a tadpole into you yet. The few advisory meetings he did hold were all just for show, and as the only person not under his control (literally or willingly), you took it upon yourself to be a minor nuisance.

You lounged lazy in your seat, swirling a chalice of wine as he discusses his brilliant new crime prevention plan. You skim the propaganda poster he's handed out, making a game out of how loosely you can hold it before it slips from your hands.

Out of the corner of your eye, you see everyone else around the table has focused on you. You hadn’t noticed the sudden hush that fell over the room until now. Adjusting your chalice slightly (you had been using it to block the sight of him), you find the Arch Duke watching you expectantly. Ah. You've been formally asked a question. How cute. You ask what you've missed, and his smile doesn't falter as he repeats himself. You've been abnormally quiet. He's just curious what your thoughts are on his proposals.

Looking back to the poster in your hand, you read more intentionally. Frankly, it's a joke. You’re honestly a little offended he even put this in front of you. Outwardly you shrug, unimpressed, and crumple the paper up a bit before dropping it onto the table. It's ambitious.

Is that all? Usually you have so much more to add.

He’s watching you carefully, and you give him nothing to work with but a shrug. You ask if he’d like you to warn the morgues in advance that half the city will be under their care in the next six months, or if it should be left as a fun surprise.

You swear you see his gauntlet twitch, fingers tightening around his quill. Satisfaction blooms in your chest. You love getting under his skin. He stares at you, face unreadable. It pains him that you think so little of him. He stepped up to save the city, and his criminal policies will ensure the city stays saved.

You laugh quietly, rolling your eyes. They’re criminal policies, that’s for certain. Murmurs break out among the advisors, and Gortash’s eyes narrow.

If you have something to say counselor, speak plainly.

You glance over, searching his face to see how much further over the line you should go. It was a clear warning, but you’ve never taken kindly to being threatened. You sit up in your seat, clasping your hands together and smiling politely back to him. I have no other comments, m’lord. Just a quick question; how much longer will this meeting take? I need to order a few thousand more axes. I’m not sure our current executioner’s supply will be adequate for your plans.

Gortash seethes and you lay your chin on your clasped hands, smiling as serenely as you can manage. You’re the only one in the room who doesn’t jump when he barks for everyone to get out, immediately. You don’t bother getting up, not at all surprised when he specifies that you are staying here.

The door slams shut on the last advisor, and you find yourself alone with the Arch Duke. You weigh your options in your head as he walks around the table. As much credit as you try to give yourself, you can’t take him in a fight. You might get a few bites in, maybe even take out an eye, but his watchers would turn you into a red smear on the wall before you could do anything lethal. You just have to play nice, get back on his good side. Should be easy enough.

He sets his hands on the back of your chair, pushing it in until you’re forced to sit up straight. Why do you think he keeps you around? An interesting question. You hazard a guess that it’s because of your stunning good looks. A small, polite chuckle from behind you. Close. You entertain him, he tells you. His hands slip to your shoulders.

It entertains him that despite how little power you have, you think you can talk to him like you’re better than he is. His fingers dig into your skin and a small feeling of unease settles into you. It entertains him that you dance around and laugh like this is all some big comedy you’re in. One hand moves to the back of your head and you only have a second to prepare before your face makes contact with the wood table, your vision flashing bright white and then black. You can’t open your eyes, and you’re not entirely sure what exactly hurts. The chair is yanked from under you and you struggle to stand, your legs uncooperative. His hand holds your head down, forcing you to stay bent over. You’re vaguely aware of him pressing himself against your ass, but you can’t bring yourself to care all that much.

Listen, and listen good. His gauntlet slips under your clothes, scratching at the skin of your hip painfully. He’s had enough of your games. He let you run off leash for far too long, and it’s time for him to rectify that mistake. He grinds against you, using one foot to kick your legs apart. You stay as still as possible, eyebrows drawing together when his hand slips between your legs. The gold claws painfully drag against the inside of your thigh, and he leans over your back to murmur into your ear. He will bring you to heel. No matter how long it may take. It’s his solemn vow to you. Bend… or break. He’ll be satisfied either way.

#always a pleasure to write a snarky reader #.enver gortash #.bg3 #notsfw

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mysticfemme · 2 months

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Bestie I know that you are very very much still mourning a relationship and that mourning and love aren’t always logical but. Any time you mention any detail about your ex. They sound so deeply mid.

They didn’t sext with you!! They were BAD at giving when you did have sex and wouldn’t hear feedback!! They didn’t treat you well long distance!!! Omg I would fight anyone who treated you like this in a relationship!!! Holy shit! You are so sweet you deserve so much more!

I've had a lot of people say this to me 😂😭

But yeah we never sexted in the entirety of the relationship, it's quite ironic really. A bunch of other shit happened that I won't say publicly, but the other night when they came over we almost had sex (we didn't which I'm very thankful for) and they were gripping my neck so hard that I had to ask them to stop several times and the bruises as a result of that have only just gone (they accidentally left a bunch of marks on my neck and I had to wear a turtleneck for like three days because of how embarrassing it was, I have a strict policy of marks only below the neckline)

But yeah I've honestly left so many shitty details out when describing things to people because I just know it would cause a reaction like yours 😭 but that helps me to realise that that stuff was just not on, at all.

#mysticfemme's asks

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thisdiscontentedwinter · 1 year

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TLDR: Some bullshit drama

Well then. This has been a long time coming.

Some of you might have noticed that we removed the three cowritten fics we’d posted with Twisted Mind, aka Queerfictionwriter. Without getting too much into the reasons behind that, except to say that we’re both much happier without such toxic behaviours in our lives, the fallout has unfortunately been public.

Because Twist then reuploaded those three fics, without our permission. She has made no attempt to contact us to gain that permission, even though she has both our emails.

Here’s the author’s note from one of the fics. It’s the same author’s note on all three.

Let’s leave aside the fact that posting someone else’s words without their permission (and attribution is not the same as permission) is an incredibly shitty thing to do. For a moment, let’s look at the “recreating what was lost to the best of my ability.”

Fact check: When you delete a fic, AO3 sends every contributor a copy. There’s no “recreation” involved.

As you can see, when Bunnywest deleted A Stranger Comes to Town, Winter received a notification and the downloaded fic.

Likewise, nobody has to remember what collections they were in... because they’re right there?

As an aside, we have to admit we found it strange that Twist was so concerned about putting the fics back into any collections, given this is her policy on collections:

Interesting.

Anyway, please disregard all that nonsense about recreation, but please do enjoy the awkward moment when a helpful commenter suggested the Wayback Machine and Twist had to admit that “luckily” she had copies:

So lucky. Moving on.

In addition to our words being posted without permission, so was the artwork that Winter made for the stories. Is it good artwork? Hell, no, but it’s still Winter’s.

For the record, we would have zero problem if Twist wanted to repost these fics with Bunny and Winter’s contributions removed. Google Docs records all edits made in docs, and we have offered to provide her with her sections if she doesn’t remember which ones she is responsible for. Now while legally Twist might be in the clear to repost our words without our permission, thanks to Joint Copyright, we think we can all agree it’s against all fandom etiquette—and just generally a shitty thing to do, even with attribution.

Please enjoy reading this post of Winter’s that Twist reblogged, where a fic writer had posted someone else’s words and thought it was okay because they attributed the original author.

https://queerfictionwriter.tumblr.com/post/190597784626/and-we-have-some-plagiarism

And feel free to note the tags she added:

We can only assume the same rules of fandom etiquette don’t apply to her.

Okay, so this is all fandom bullshit, right? You’re saying it, and trust us, we’re saying it too. Who the fuck even cares about this, or the performative theatre taking place in Twist’s comments section? It’s so fucking stupid, and yes, you’re right! We had zero intent of getting involved in this bullshit, trust us. We were done. But that was before Twist took it beyond fandom.

So here’s where we look at the end note that Twist added to the reuploaded fics:

No dogpiling, huh? Well, since it’s a sensible social media policy for professional authors not to call out reviews, we won’t mention exactly what Twist did, but we’re sure you can guess. And yes, there are screenshots that tie those Amazon reviews to at least two of Twist’s close friends. But we won’t be posting them publicly since, unlike some people, we don’t just say “no dogpiling” and then point people in the direction to do it, we actually mean it.

They know who they are. Which is honestly probably punishment enough.

So no, Bunny and Winter will not be sharing the details of Twist’s toxic behaviour that took place over a long period of time in private spaces (but boy does Winter have a funny story about a computer keyboard!). But we will leave you to make up your own mind about someone who would take some irrelevant fandom bullshit and use it as the motivation to launch a spiteful attack on someone’s actual career.

And for those of you who are currently friends with Twist and can’t even recognise the person we’ve written about here, we know. We’ve been where you are now. Reach out in a few years, because that’s how long it seems to take everyone for the penny to drop. When someone mentions that they can’t maintain a friendship and that in the past people have ghosted her, it pays to remember that there might be a very good reason for that, and you’re only getting half of the story.

To the flying monkeys who are posting spite reviews on Amazon though, please don’t ever reach out. You are all allegedly adults—two of you are teachers—and here you are playing middle school games with someone’s career. We wish you nothing but karma.

In the meantime, and somewhat ironically, we’ve met a lot of lovely people through Twist. We’re leaving her toxicity in the past, but we’re keeping them.

Thanks for them, at least, Twist. They make it worth it.

#fandom bullshit

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unclewaynemunson · 1 year

Text

Coffee shop AU, Christmas edition

(AO3 link)

It was Christmas Eve and Robin hated her life. Not because she hated Christmas, no, she actually loved Christmas, but because she had to work during the most festive days of the year. Days, plural. Correct. She had to work through all of Christmas. She really shouldn't have taken that random weekend off with Steve, of course Keith would want to punish them for that; she just hadn't thought he'd be evil enough to make them work all of the fucking Christmas shifts instead. But here she was.

She had been in a terrible mood for the whole day, driving Steve absolutely crazy, but finally, the pointers on the big clock behind the bar started creeping their way towards 10 o'clock and she could start fantasizing about the leftover turkey that would be waiting for her at home.

Steve kept glancing at his watch every ten seconds, and Robin felt sorry for him. It was kind of her fault that he had to work today and miss out on the majority of his first Christmas with his boyfriend, and she hadn't exactly been in a festive mood today.

'You know what, why don't you get out of here already?' she suggested.

He looked up from the coffee machine that he was cleaning, a dishcloth draped over his shoulder and that ridiculous Santa hat they both had to wear as part of their uniform during all of December still on his head.

'We still have twelve minutes and eighteen seconds till closing,' Steve pointed out.

Robin snorted. 'I think I can handle those by myself. I'm serious, don't worry about it. Eddie probably needs you more than I do on this fine Christmas Eve.'

The mere mention of Eddie's name was enough to bring a completely lovestruck smile onto Steve's face.

Robin grabbed the dishcloth from his shoulder and pushed him away from the coffee machine, ready to take over.

That was enough for him to take off his apron and give Robin a hug and a kiss on her hair – she had ditched her own Santa hat hours ago, that thing was way too sweaty and uncomfortable to be wearing all day and Keith wasn't around anyway.

'You're my hero. Love you, Buck. Happy Christmas.'

Despite her bad mood, she couldn't help but smile at him. 'Happy Christmas, dingus.'

He rushed his way out of the door, into the darkness outside.

'Steve, wait!' she called out, just when he was about to close the door behind him. 'Your hat.'

'Oh, fuck, forgot about that.' He took off his hat and tossed it towards Robin – it landed right onto the counter surprisingly gracefully – before he combed his hands through his hair to make it all puffy and gravity-defying again. 'You just saved my life, you know that, right? Eddie would've never let me forget if I showed up at his place with that thing on my head.'

'Tell him merry Christmas from me.'

'Will do.' He saluted at her and closed the door behind him, leaving Robin alone with soft jazzy Christmas music playing through the speakers and eleven minutes left until she could finally lock the door.

She quietly hummed along to the music as she finished cleaning the coffee machine and got the last couple of cups out of the dishwasher.

Five minutes left...

Three more to go...

Just one minute...

The doorbell chimed. Goddamnit.

'We're closed!' Robin yelled without looking up from the dishwasher.

'Sorry. Just a cup of tea, please,' a clear girl's voice said.

'You know, I was just getting ready to get out of here, I've been here all day while literally everybody else in this town is getting ready for the most amazing time of the year and I haven't been able to stop thinking about the turkey that's waiting for me at home since noon, and honestly, it's kind of shitty to come in here and bother minimum wage retails workers in the literal last minute of their shift, getting them to work about ten unpaid minutes just because you decided at the most inconvenient time ever that you wanted a cup of tea real bad, and usually, I'd do it, and even smile while doing so because that's our store policy, but right now, it's Christmas Eve and I wanna go home because I have to be back here at 8am tomorrow morning, on Christmas, so no, no cup of tea for you today, miss. My apologies. Why would you even want to get a cup of tea on fucking Christmas Eve all by yourself, do you have nothing better to do?'

It wasn't until then that Robin was finally ready to close the dishwasher and looked up from her work to meet whoever was standing at the counter.

'Oh, shit,' she uttered when she saw the customer: the girl had very clearly just had some kind of nervous breakdown. Her curly hair was all messed up, as if she'd been desperately pulling it, and her big eyes were puffy and as red as the tip of her nose.

'I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to be rude to you,' she quickly said, quietly cursing herself for being such an idiot.

'No, I'm sorry,' said the customer before Robin could continue rambling apologies or start firing all kinds of impertinent questions at her. 'You're clearly having a shitty Christmas Eve, I don't wanna take up any of your time. It's just... I saw that the lights were still on in here, and I was kind of freezing outside, so I thought... Sorry. I'll leave you to it.'

'No, wait,' said Robin, when the girl was already turning around towards the door. 'Let me get you that tea. Don't worry about it. I'm gonna have to reheat that turkey anyway, so those ten minutes won't make that much of a difference, honestly.'

The girl shot her a hesitant look. 'Are you sure?'

'Yeah, of course. Come on, take a seat, your tea will be right up, it's on the house. What flavor do you want? I'm guessing you could use something calming, how 'bout chamomile?'

'Chamomile sounds good, thanks,' the girl said, taking a seat on one of the stools at the bar. Her voice sounded small and Robin couldn't help but wonder what her story was, but she knew she probably shouldn't pry, no matter how badly she wanted to.

'How long have you been outside for?' she asked, settling for what seemed like an acceptably non-prying question.

'What?'

'You said you were freezing outside. Have you been, like, walking around, or...?' Are you homeless? She didn't look homeless; the woolen coat she was currently disposing onto the stool next to her looked expensive, and underneath it, she was wearing a tight jumper in a dark shade of red, and even though her hair was disheveled, it seemed to be a perm exactly following the latest trend.

'Thanks,' said the girl when Robin handed her her tea, not answering the unfinished question that was still hanging in the air between them.

'Jeez, your hands!' Robin couldn't help but blurt out: her fingers were white as a corpse.

'Yeah.' The girl held her hands over the cup, warming them on the steam that was emerging from the hot water. 'I lost track of time out there.'

Robin shot her a worried look. 'Did you get hypothermia? I could check in the back if we have, like, a blanket or something to get you warmed up?'

'I'm fine, don't worry about it,' the girl said. 'It's nice and warm in here. And the tea helps.'

When looking past the redness around her eyes and the heartbreakingly sad look in them, the girl was actually very pretty, Robin noticed. Her eyes were a dark shade of blue and huge in her fine-featured face. She had a cute nose, even though it was red from the cold outside, and beautifully shaped lips.

'D'you wanna talk about it?' Robin asked.

''Bout what?'

''Bout why you were taking a hike all by yourself on this cold Christmas Eve, showing up here looking like you've been crying for hours...'

The girl wrapped her hands around her cup – her fingers had turned from that deadly pale shade to a burning red – and blew into the steam.

'I take it you're not having a great Christmas, huh?' Robin continued when she didn't get any response from the girl. She should probably stop prying.

The girl grimaced. 'Yeah, you can say that much. I um... We were having this family dinner, with my grandparents and all. I said something I shouldn't have. And even though my parents are generally supportive of me, my grandparents...' She paused to sigh. 'They're from another generation, you know? So they didn't really like what I said when they asked me when I'd finally bring a boyfriend home for Christmas, and my parents didn't exactly back me up like I hoped they would, so I just – I had to get out of there.' New tears were appearing in the girl's eyes, making Robin feel guilty that she even asked about it in the first place.

She drew in a shaky breath before she continued. 'I just want them to – to love me the way I am, you know?'

Robin nodded. Usually, she wasn't great at picking up on subtext and hidden meanings, but when it was about this kind of subject, she was a true master in reading between the lines.

Acting braver than she felt, she stretched out a hand and covered the girl's cold fingers with her own.

The girl looked up from her tea, big blue eyes piercing into Robin's, making her breath catch.

'I know,' Robin said, quietly. 'I know exactly what you mean.'

Suddenly, it felt like too much, too overwhelming; those huge doe eyes gazing up at her, the sensation of her skin against the palm of Robin's hand, the quiet around them, only disturbed by the background Christmas jazz...

Robin took a step back and cleared her throat, then took up a cloth to start wiping the counter, which had already been cleaned, but she needed something to keep her hands busy, to pretend like she had something to do in there other than staring at the beautiful girl in front of her.

'So what are you gonna do?' she asked, when the silence started weighing onto her too heavily.

The girl shrugged, didn't quite meet Robin's eyes. 'Finish my tea,' she said.

'And after that?'

She sighed. 'I don't know. I really don't wanna go back home yet. But they'll probably get worried at some point, and I can hardly stay outside in the cold for another hour, and I don't really feel like crashing any of my friends' family dinners with my gay drama.'

'You could come with me.'

There was a silence, a somewhat aloof look in the girl's eyes.

'I'm sorry,' Robin said immediately. 'We barely know each other, that was weird. It was a terrible idea, forget I said that. Just – you can finish your tea and I'll close off and –'

'No, it's um – it's really sweet that you offered that. I don't wanna impose, though. Your parents...' She didn't finish her sentence, made some kind of undefined gesture with her arms.

'Don't worry 'bout it, they won't mind. There's probably enough leftover turkey for the both of us, anyway. You can use the phone here to call your parents, say that you're staying at a friend's or whatever...'

The girl bit her lip. A cute blush was appearing on her cheeks. 'Would it be okay – would you mind calling them for me? I really don't know what to tell them and I don't wanna get into some huge fight over the phone, you know?'

'Yeah, of course, sure thing.'

The girl dictated the number for Robin to dial, and not long after, she was met with a woman's voice at the other end of the line.

'Hi, um, I’m a friend of –' She turned around to look at the girl sitting on the other side of the bar, realizing she had no idea what her name was.

'Nancy,' the girl whispered.

'Nancy! A friend of Nancy's. Robin. Um, I just wanted to let you know that she's okay and she's with me, so you don't have to worry about her. She won't be coming back for a little while longer, though. Is there anything I can pass on to her?'

Robin heard Nancy's mother sigh into her ear.

'Can you please tell her that we love her very much? And that we try to support her as best as we can, but that her grandparents – it's complicated. We love her, but we love them, too. Can you tell her that, please?'

Robin wanted to make some petty remark about unconditional love, but swallowed her words, thinking it wasn't her place, and instead said that she would deliver the message to Nancy, which she did after she hung up the phone.

'It sucks, doesn't it?' she added. 'They always say that it's complicated, but I don't know, maybe it's just me, but it really doesn't seem that complicated to me. Right?'

'Thanks –' Nancy's eyes flashed downwards for a second, to the button on Robin's apron. '-Robin,' she said with a shy smile around her lips. It was the first time Robin saw her smile, and it looked beautiful on her, revealing a whole maze of tiny soft lines and dimples around her mouth and nose.

Robin cleared her throat, realizing she was staring. 'Come on, time to head home,' she said.

When they got outside, both wrapped in their coats, they were met with an icy night: the wind was stinging in Robin's face and their breaths formed tiny clouds in front of their faces.

Robin glanced down at Nancy's bare hands. 'Don't you have any gloves?'

'I kinda left in a rush,' Nancy answered. 'Is it far to your house?'

'Couple blocks. Here, let me keep you warm.' She held out her hand, which was wrapped in a warm mitten.

The girl opened her mouth as if she wanted to protest, but Robin just took her hand before she could say anything.

'Does this help?'

Another smile lit up Nancy's features. 'Yeah, it helps,' she said, suddenly sounding shy – which made Robin feel shy, too, because now she was holding Nancy's hand and she hadn't really thought this through because she was also bringing her home with her and she didn't even know her but she knew she was into girls and what was she actually doing here, exactly?

But Nancy gently squeezed her hand and that simple touch was enough to pull Robin out of her spiraling thoughts and stop her from losing her mind; she looked down to their linked hands and couldn't help but grin. It felt safe, somehow, and if Nancy hadn't been so sad, it could even have been cozy. Suddenly, the December air around them didn't feel so cold anymore.

☃️

'You wanna go home?' Robin asked after they had finished their turkey and chatted with her parents for a while. Her parents were in the kitchen to do some last dishes, leaving Nancy and Robin alone at the table.

'You don't have to,' she quickly added when she saw the look in Nancy's eyes. 'You can stay for as long as you need. Seriously, I don't know how to say this without sounding creepy, but you can totally stay the night – not meant in a creepy way.'

Nancy chuckled. 'Maybe I'd like that, if you truly don't mind. My grandparents are leaving tomorrow morning, and I don't really feel like having another confrontation with them...'

'Yeah, I get that,' Robin mumbled.

And that's how she ended up sharing her bed with Nancy. She couldn't stop herself from shooting a glance over her shoulder when Nancy was getting changed into some borrowed pajamas which were way too big on her. She looked amazingly pretty, her pale skin almost glowing in the dim light, and Robin quickly averted her gaze. She had promised Nancy it would be a non-creepy sleepover and she was planning on keeping that promise.

But when they were in bed together, she could hear Nancy's breathing and feel the warmth she was emitting, and she figured she wouldn't be getting a whole lot of sleep that night.

☃️

Her alarm woke Robin up before the sun had properly set. The first thing she noticed were the arms wrapped around her; apparently, Nancy had snuggled up to her back while they were sleeping, and now she was clinging onto her while softly breathing into her ear. Robin's breath caught and she lifted her head to look behind her.

She didn't know if Nancy had already been awake or not, but Robin's movement made her stir and disentangle her limbs from Robin's body. It left Robin feeling empty, like she lost something important, and she turned around completely so that she could face Nancy.

'Merry Christmas,' the girl said to her. It was barely more than a whisper.

She looked more content than last night, as far as Robin could see in the half-dark of the dawn: well-rested, less distressed, with a hint of a smile tugging at her lips.

'Merry Christmas,' Robin murmured back, her voice as hoarse as it was every morning.

She felt Nancy's arm slide around her waist again, and she moved a little bit closer in response, resting their foreheads together, just taking in the peace and quiet of the early Christmas morning. Almost subconsciously, her breathing aligned itself with Nancy's.

'Thank you for everything, Robin,' Nancy whispered into the few inches of space between them.

Her lips fluttered against Robin's, so softly that Robin wondered if it really happened or if she was still caught in a dream.

'Is this okay?' Nancy looked at her attentively, a questioning look in her big blue eyes.

It was real, Robin realized. Nancy was really kissing her. In her bed. While wearing her pajamas. On Christmas morning.

Her heart rate was speeding up, but she knew what she wanted and she wasn't afraid, not as long as Nancy was looking at her like that: she tangled her fingers into Nancy's messy curls and leaned in to kiss her properly.

She supposed it should probably be gross, sharing their first kiss while both of them had morning breath and smelled like sleep, but it wasn't, it really wasn't – it tasted like Nancy, and Nancy was perfect, so this was perfect, too. It was warm and sleepy, getting more heated as seconds passed, and Robin didn't think she would ever get enough of it, of that feeling of Nancy's soft lips against hers, their tastes on each other's tongues, their bodies pressed against each other under the warm covers. She could stay like this forever, and even though she would have to get back to work in less than an hour, she knew that she had still gotten the perfect Christmas.

#strangerthingsfestivefun #fruity four #ronance #steddie #robin buckley #nancy wheeler #steve harrington #stranger things #christmas #don't mind me rambling about stranger things #fruity ficlet

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