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#it's exactly the same for me
alicewestwater · a day ago
WHAT IS SWEET BRIAR???? IM CURIOUS also pocket lesbians
okay so i’ve talked about pocket lesbians here already !
[this is my original work, do not use / repurpose / plagiarise in any form]
sweet briar the working title for a webcomic i’ve had banging around in my head since i was thirteen in various different mediums. it’s essentially a mlm romance except their relationship is extremely nuanced by the fact that both of them are extremely aspec and one of them is arospec 🤸
this story has had multiple names and forms [the original being in like 2016 when i was still in my c*shet phase] but essentially its form progression looks like this: short story [full romance, meet-cute, mlw]—> novel [still romance, neighbours to lovers (is that even a trope), mlm] —> webcomic [contemporary, strangers to lovers, mlm]. details:
mcs are dev [he/they] and adrien [he/him]. the story’s sort of an exploration of queer romance but through an aroace lens? i’m aromantic and have never been very comfortable with writing “proper” romances, so this story is like a compromise which i love
by virtue of the storytelling medium, this would involve three “seasons”: the first one focusses on adrien starting afresh in a place where he isn't known only as “the trans kid” and deals with self-identity; the second one on dev’s extremely strained relationship with their [homophobic] family and with realising that you don't have to forgive the shitty people in your life. the third season would be idk lmao but it would focus mostly on their relationship!
they're both asian <3 adrien’s chinese and dev’s desi, and there is ofc going to be a lot of me gushing about being asian and how sexy it is through the characters because i like doing so.
the entire story is secretly a love letter to singapore, which is where their uni is [it’s a college story again! which i want to make when i’m in uni too] and where the majority of the story is set, and is also probably my favourite place in the world and where i wanted to go to for uni but can’t because reasons but we don’t talk about that
since it’ll be a webcomic i am very excited to see how my “drafting” process would have to adapt and also might have to learn to screen write just for this and that might be really fun 👁️
ask me about my wips!
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whorehees · 4 days ago
they weren’t lying, smell really is the most powerful memory
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#tom was here today and this is the first time we’ve been in the same room close together without masks#and he smells EXACTLY the same it made me a little feral I thought my brain was gonna short circuit#had to resist the urge to bury my face where his hair had been it was all I could smell when I sat in my recliner after I left#god this was a terrible idea lmao#okay full deets he got here and my dog broke my change dish and knocked over everything because she was SO happy to see him#he met my new cats who were surprisingly calm for two cats that really aren’t socialized to other people besides me#we watched GvK and he kept dozing off and I kept sneakily looking at him I will never get over how long and pretty this mans eyelashes are#I HATE him actually uhhhh and then we sat around awkwardly for a bit bc neither of us knew what to do#finally he was like ‘I should probably head home’ so we went out to the kitchen where he got his shoes on and we were talking and he said#‘thanks for letting me come over’ and hugged me which was very surprising and the we talked some more and right before he left he hugged me#AGAIN but it’s was like. different#I have a thing abt eye contact in general I HATE it but whenever I make eye contact with Tom it’s like my brain turns to sludge#and this time when he pulled away it was like. slower? and I think that maybe if I had made eye contact with him he might’ve kissed me.#I don’t know how to feel about that or if I was just seeing what I wanted???#anyway I can’t stop thinking about him and I want to die#personal#don’t rb#okay to interact#tag rant#long tags
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haram-jaan · 4 days ago
#I have to live knowing I’m related to literal scum of the earth#which is fine#but my mum has to live knowing she raised him lol#it’s weird he’s a direct result of their parenting#he’s exactly what they wanted#misogyny sexism racism homophobia all of it#and I went the opposite direction#but bc their parenting is so different for a boy vs a girl#it was obvious that would happen#but the fundamentals are the same if u were a decent person u would’ve realised that it’s wrong#but instead when my dad cuts me off for months at a time he thinks it’s justified#he laughs when my dad lashes out at me#he laughs when I’m crying#he’s literally spawn of Satan I can’t think of any good qualities#that reminds me#at almost every big part of my life so far my dad hasn’t been talking to me#when I finished school and got into uni#first year of uni#final year#lol#I refuse to let him take credit for my achievements bc everything I’ve achieved I have done so on my own#plus the fact that I’ve had to do it under severe emotional duress & trauma lol#I rly sat trying to finish my degree in a pandemic while my dad screamed the house down everyday talking about how useless I am#:))))))))))))) and then when I got my results he wasn’t talking to me#so he went n told everyone else before congratulating me looooool#shit that my mum thinks I’m to blame for everything#a lot of the time I’ve gotten in serious shit for defending her#and she’s blamed me lol#:)#anyway I think it’s time to sleep
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pc-cooper · 5 days ago
hmmmm ... i think the thing that really separates ianto’s relationship with jack from the other main characters (besides, you know, the obvious bits) is that he understands that jack *can* die. the others treat his immortality with the idea that he can’t die, so him getting killed isn’t that big of a deal. on the other hand, ianto sees it as jack still Dies, feels the pain of dying, and has to drag himself back every single time. he puts so much value into jack’s life where others don’t because he understands that he still goes through so much pain even if he’ll recover from it ... anywaysss
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art--school--wannabe · 6 days ago
hm.  i am bottling up all the things i have not yet oh idk.  DONE and so i uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh have returned to my default state of looking at references for the unicorn tattoo i wanna get
#apparently one of the best references for what i'm looking at like for its position/body#is uh...........a b*rnum poster.  which.  makes sense but i'm not exactly fond of the guy.#i'll be using the poster as reference because like it's got the horse and the ring of fire but like.  eeh.#how do i even explain the style to the artist whenever this does happen.  like.. traditional style but like with some extra carousel horse#sprinkled in there if yk what i mean can you do that for me#i mean to be fair i think i'm pretty clear in like what i'm looking for.  it's just a matter of finding the right artist#like..............................if my dad wants matching tattoos i sure as FUCK am not doing something stupid#unicorn.  hoop of fire.  the unicorn is mostly black and white with some red mixed in because van halen colors.#tbh the van halen colors are more important to him but i like the color scheme since that was what i had in mind from the beginning#then at one point he was like 'oh we could do the trans colors' yeah um thanks for being supportive now but um.  My Vision#and.. also.. we both have the same skin tone.  those colors would have to be hEAVILY altered in order for it to fade good i think#like yeah i'm gonna be doing more pride stuff and honestly i consider the unicorn a pride thing already#but if i just started putting pastel pinks and blues on me.. that's not gonna look good.  it really isn't.#like it needs to be rooted somewhere in reds and greens especially if i'm going for color.  because those don't like.. clash..#i'm overthinking this and comparing tattoo ink with makeup colors but like same idea.  i don't wanna pour money down the drain#for something that's gonna really need touching up a lot and also just not look great in the first place
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david-watts · 12 days ago
imagine yelling at me because I used the dryer for like... fifteen minutes because ‘you’re wasting power don’t you care about the environment’ but the second it’s a little bit cold they have to have the aircon on full blast on so hot that it starts making me feel dizzy and get full-body pangs telling me that I’m overheating get cool immediately, but no they can’t just wear a jumper
#I'm in the coldest fucking room of the house with a broken window and the back door has to be open from eight am til eleven pm#because the dog 'might want to go out'#and I am not wearing a particularly warm jumper and I'm still debating taking it off because it's a little warm#probably not helped by the fact I had to stand in there for a bit#I'm just saying it's not that cold what the fuck#I'm gonna gloss over the fact that she likes to yell at me for destroying the environment because she doesn't actually care#case in point the times I have told her actual facts and she yelled at me because 'those aren't true'#she votes liberal because she thinks scomo is a 'nice young man'#but god she yelled at me at least thrice over the summertime for having the fan on 'because it'd wear out the motor'#guess which fan is running in her bedroom that will not be occupied until eleven pm tonight#and then she yelled at me because I wanted to have the aircon on because I don't remember I was really hot#anyway my point is she's being a huge fucking hypocrite and I'm not even allowed to talk back 'because that doesn't work'#actually sometimes with a gaslighting narcissist you do need to challenge those fucking behaviours#though you wouldn't know because you play the victim and refuse to admit you're exactly the same as her WOULD YOU.#also she vacuumed today being upset at me for not doing it#because apparently I didn't do it literally yesterday even though. she saw me doing it.#it's almost as if anything I say is immediately dismissed because what do I know#not like I do those jobs every week and she has never done it in the entirety of the time I've lived here#and yet she still acts like she knows the best way to do it#I hate it here I just wanna bash my skull in with a rock
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burned-dreams · 12 days ago
the nerve at this one guy from uni
i don't mind helping with subjects that you don't understand but to simply be like hey do this assignment for me or can i copy this from you and clearly not caring to understand what is going on and just wanting your work finished for you annoys me
like i'm not doing your work for you
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traumacure · 14 days ago
i've amassed 1k followers here already... in terms of active accounts it's probably already surpassed my main lol. anyway, hello everyone, i hope today is treating you all well 💙
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ronnie-woody · 14 days ago
just finished listening to the latest audio book I got last week and at the end the author talked about how he gets his ideas and how his writing process is going and I was just there like: yes, yes, exactly like that, can relate 1000%
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ratracechronicler · 17 days ago
Five days in and I’d think I’d actually so much as start Camp Nano but instead I’m still working on Moonshine and marveling at how it’s slowly revealed that all of the three main characters have ambitions that are both their driving force and personal downfalls, not just the fiery two--in fact, Sam is arguably the most ambitious, he just expresses it differently and makes a quiet, humble impression so you don’t realize it at first and-
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unproduciblesmackdown · 19 days ago
deluxe bonus extended edition post: the first version i made, which now works, i guess, and is approx 11 seconds long to the other version’s 5 seconds. a whole extra line of the song ft. winston being “rude” montage!
#i put ''rude'' in quotation marks b/c [deep inhale to imply the impending wynnstannery thoughts & nuance essay that Could follow]#winston billions#deh#will roland#deserves all the same tags babey......ended off on a similar Beat of [taylor is looking]'s always winnie n tay hours#these technical difficulties i swear......when i was editing this i couldn't even See the clips i was working w/that well#they wouldn't always display as i was playing the Project......augh#like i'm not getting super fancy out here but i Do like to have the option to try honing some things down a bit lol#like clip order / getting the timing as close as possible.....that the playback in the program can be laggy so like#there can and has been that issue of ''thought i Cut where the actual Cut was in the clips but there's a stray frame from the wrong shot at#the beginning or end of things''#exciting behind the scenes glimpse into things in that the first 5 sec of this is Very Similar to but not exactly the same as the other post#b/c i started from scratch like 3 times on this thing#really the crux of the original idea; besides applying the ''i'll take your advice / (i'll) try to be more nice'' line to winston in s3 is#that i wanted that like. sort of Performance Of Skepticism / lack of outright Enthusiasm in 3x09 as winston goes#''sure why not'' in that way he does to be what goes with that Beat in ''more....Nice'' lol#felt it would align quite well#and i liked how the other clips i'd chosen Worked so i just repeated those choices when i restarted things.........what a saga smh#for a Combined < 20 sec of video lol.......oh well. undeterred wynnstannery from yours truly....from. from Sincerely Me......#you've heard of ''i've got options; so; let me put this in your language [winston puts his feet up on the table] What's In It For Moi?''#get ready for: You've got options; what's in it for vous is two versions of a video goof at your disposal#oh wait b/c this is unclear: that first clip in the ''montage'' that overlaps more with ''i'll turn it around'' is more placed there to#Match Those Vocals somewhat; vs being a particularly ''maybe not being More...Nice(tm)'' moment lol#but guess it could possibly represent the apparent perceived Rudeness in that scene of guaranteeing his coding#which reminds me lmao. having come up with the word ''cockcertainty'' re: winston in Just That kind of context lol....#beyond Cocksure; is the idea there
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banglatown · 22 days ago
here is an excellent vid by xiran, they articulated my feelings better than i ever could
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fauvester · 26 days ago
I started TMA so I had something to listen to and Not look at a screen and lots of my friends like it.. I’m on ep 27 and mostly listening out of momentum and hope so far, it’s got a big thesaurus-happy poorly-written creepypasta Something normal happened but it was.... off.... somehow... eyes/meat/sound/skin was.. unnatural...... color inverted mickey mouse OooooOoooOooo....... vibe. It wants what Nightvale effortlessly has
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panharmonium · 26 days ago
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do you ever just sit and think about this
mizuki telling iruka that naruto is going to take revenge on the village for lying about the fox, and iruka replying “no...naruto isn’t like that” orochimaru telling kakashi that sasuke is an avenger whose heart desires only one thing, and kakashi replying “you think you can take advantage of that?  not sasuke.”
iruka thinking “naruto...he’s just like i was back then”
gai thinking “he reminds me of you, kakashi...when you were young”
mizuki manipulating naruto for his own benefit (“he used you to get the scroll for himself, for his own power!”) and using a big reveal (“they’ve been lying to you your whole life, naruto”) to damage naruto’s trust in the person who’s actually trying to help him
madara doing the exact same thing with sasuke
kakashi telling iruka “actually, you are the only one who can reach naruto’s heart/i believe if you can just hang in there a little longer, you will find the way”
kakashi later being put in a position where he’s the only adult who has a chance of getting through to sasuke...the only adult who even bothers to try
kakashi telling iruka that reaching naruto is “your personal ordeal,” the task he’s meant to complete, the task that he isn’t allowed to quit, even when he goes to the hokage to try and resign 
sakumo telling kakashi “it seems you have unfinished business waiting for you back home/there must be something you’re still meant to do” as kakashi gets yanked out of the afterlife, because kakashi is living out his own personal ordeal now and he isn’t allowed to quit either
i know you have your reasons, but as your teacher i can’t just walk away
i know that’s how you feel, naruto (i *do* know how you feel)
i’m in charge of this child’s safety (i’ll protect you with my life) 
he’s going home with me.
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i think about this a Lot.  in particular, i think about the ways in which the ability to make (or not make, as the case may be) a connection to a single trusted adult has such a dramatic effect on the trajectories that naruto and sasuke’s lives take later.
naruto finds “his” grown-up - someone who’s lived the same life he has and who can understand him in a way that others can’t - and that in turn leads him to more connections, more adults to look after him, an entire surrogate family to believe in him/support him/make him feel like he belongs.  sasuke, for his part, also finds “his” grown-up - but in his case, the situation is much more complicated, and he’s never able to reap the attendant benefits.  events conspire to send him running before he can become truly connected to a loving community, and so he never has a chance to build the larger support system that naruto does.  he never finds a jiraiya or a tsunade or a yamato or a bunch of animal sages to give him guidance or a class of peers to fight for him or a village to admire him and protect him.  he has no support network.  every adult he’s met since leaving the Leaf has been someone who’s trying to exploit him, and the instant he realizes that he might be starting to feel the faintest connection to taka, he ditches them.  to this day, the only friends he’s ever made (and i use that term loosely, because even when sasuke was still in the Leaf his relationships weren’t a first priority for him) are sakura and naruto.  and the ONLY adult he’s ever had a true connection with, post-massacre, is kakashi.
sasuke’s going to need all three of these people if he’s going to survive, but i’m focusing on kakashi in this particular piece, because if ever there were a kid who desperately needed a trusted adult to help them navigate their life, sasuke is it.  sasuke has been left to his own devices for years and years (everybody remember that time when a seven year old who witnessed the mass murder of his entire extended family was allowed to wake up ALONE in a hospital room and walk out of the building and revisit the crime scene without anyone noticing he was gone?  i do!).  he has never had an adult to take care of him or help him process the things that happened to him in a semi-healthy way, and nowadays he’s a disaster driving itself off a cliff.  he has zero coping skills that aren’t completely self-destructive.  he won’t accept advice or assistance from anybody who doesn’t understand what he’s going through (and understandably so - why should he listen to anybody who isn’t feeling what he’s feeling, who hasn’t lost the way he’s lost?  what can they possibly have to offer him?).  he needs somebody who can come to him from a place of credibility, someone who can say “i *do* know how you feel” and not be talking out their ass.  that’s what naruto gets from iruka when they finally make their connection - a relationship with an adult who accepts him and believes in him and (most importantly of all) understands him.  that’s naruto’s first step on the way to him reaching the place he inhabits now, where the lonely and shunned orphan he used to be is beloved by everyone, blessed with multiple parental figures, and supported by innumerable friends both at home and abroad.  meeting an adult who could say “we’re the same” and have it genuinely be true instead of just empty talk is what allows naruto to finally feel like he isn’t alone.  it’s what enables him to eventually become part of a community.  
naruto has these opportunities because he finds His Person - a mentor and caretaker who can say with complete honesty “we’re the same.”  sasuke found someone like that, too, and in truth he still has that person chasing after him, but circumstances being what they are, he hasn’t been able to benefit from that relationship the same way naruto has.  he was removed from kakashi’s supervision at the exact moment when he needed it most (and at the exact moment where they had just broken new ground in their relationship), and because of that, he’s remained incredibly isolated.  naruto has steadily accumulated friends and comrades (and five different people to be his dad), but sasuke has connected with no one.  he’s completely alone.  he is - as neji aptly put it - in the darkness right now, and he’s in there all by himself, without friends to support him, and without the only adult who can point him in the right direction.  
honestly, the only thing that makes me feel better about this is knowing that sasuke still has these people waiting for him whenever he comes home.  it’s high time he was able to have his own iruka and benefit from the same network of loving connections that naruto was able to build.
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