#it's def been a fun hunt for details!

[bibliophileiz]

!

I'm feeling bad about my salty addition yesterday to the post about spn's terrible pregnantKelly/Jack plotline, so let me explain my feelings toward jack as a character with more context and nuance.

first of all i think Alexander Calvert's performance is great. here's a relatively young actor taking a character who as introduced is basically a talking baby in an adult man's body. Many other actors of his age and experience would have taken that in such a cringeworthy direction the character would been dead by the mid-season premiere. Jack as played by Calvert outlasts Castiel.

(as a side note to that, I just want to give AlCal a shoutout for his portrayal of Belphagor. I thought the season 15 premiere was especially weak with even Jared, Jensen and Misha seeming to lack their usual energy. Alex was the only one having any fun, and honestly one of the few things i remember liking about season 15.)

I also think Jack as a character had a lot of potential, despite his extremely stupid origins (and they were SO stupid. i mean. the pRESIDENT?) and not all that potential went unfufilled. The best example of this is his dynamic with Sam and their season 13 arc. They start out with Sam being the only one who believes Jack is good despite his powers, despite his inability to control them. He sees some of Kripke-era Sam (also known as the best Sam) in Jack and tries to lead him out of his shell and into confidence with his powers but also confidence in himself, all with a dash of "you're not evil kid, so don't act like it"

Sam's dynamic with lucifer is relevant here as well because it's season 13 that really leans into Sam's trauma around that. So when he runs into the house right after Jack is born and hears the son of lucifer call him "Father" it's pretty spine-chilling. But it comes full circle at the end of the season when, as lucifer attempts to abduct and kill Jack, Sam jumps in the middle of them and defends Jack from his biological-but-not-real father, prompting lucifer to say "Daddy Sammy to the rescue." I hope you're seeing the themes here.

(i know all anyone remembers about that episode is the truly horrendous direction of the michael-lucifer fight scene, and it's so frustrating because the writing and themes are actually really good. robert singer, why must you and eugenie fuck up literally everything?)

Jack's relationship with other characters can be well-written at times too. Some of the writers tried to give him good consistent dynamics with people like Mary and Bobby and tried to write him learning hunting and his powers as a basic coming of age, sometimes heroe's journey story. robert berens, who despite being a little overrated as a writer was def the best of the pre-dabb-era writers in the final seasons, seemed to be the only one writing jack's powers in a consistent and thematically conscious way. (Without going into too many details, if you pay attention to berens' episodes you can see a lot of consistency in how jack's powers and the visions they grant other characters affect those characters' actions. there's a conscious effort to make them relevant to the show's faith and free will themes.)

But overall I find Jack frustrating. Because no matter how hard writers like Steve Yockey and Robert Berens tried to write Jack's character and relationships with other characters like Mary and Sam in a consistent, interesting, and thematically relevant way, at the end of the day, the showrunners seemed most interested in using Jack as Whatever The Plot Needed Him To Be To Make Dean (and sometimes Cas) Make A Sad Face. Even if that means he's out of character, even if it means the logic of an episode makes no sense, even if it means a multi-episode arc has events that don't logically follow one another.

Take for example the end of season 14 when Jack loses his soul. (And in fairness, I'll point out that soulless Sam was written a little inconsistently as well.) The first episode after that when they're trying to figure out how that affects Jack is actually done pretty well (which checks out bc i think it's written by Steve Yockey). Jack figures out he doesn't really have a morality instinct anymore and decides that in order to be Good, he should try to emulate Sam, Dean, and Cas/make people happy. The first sign that this could go horribly wrong is that he assumes his new snake pet is sad because its old owner died so he decides to make it "happy" by reuniting them ... in heaven ... by killing his pet. Leaving out for a second why he thinks that's a thing Sam and Dean would ever do, it at least makes a kind of twisted logic that is pretty in keeping with early seasons jack who was conciously trying to follow very basic rules of right and wrong.

My memory of late season 14/15 is hazy because I hate them so much, but from what I do remember the next big Something's Wrong With Jack plot is in the episode where he's hanging out with the teenagers and he starts using his powers in front of them, making an angel blade twist and spin in midair and accidentally stabbing one of the other kids when she's scared and tries to run away. Also known as The Episode That Made Me Hate Jack.

This episode has soulless Jack being the equivalent of a kid who backs his friends into a corner and points his dad's gun at them, taunting "It's not loaded!" But a bigger problem from a story telling standpoint is it doesn't logically follow the snake thing. Jack killed the snake because he was trying to be morally good without understanding morals. But the conflict in this episode is framed as Jack wanting to fit in with and impress his new friends. One, it has nothing to do with morality. Two, it suggests that despite being soulless Jack stills cares about things.

Then there's Mary. We've got to have a way to make Dean so distraught and put him in such a dark place that he's willing to consider killing jack at the end of the season, so the obvious way to do that is to have Jack kill Mary. (Or Sam or Cas, but as previously stated this show thrives on the tears of angsty white men, so they were always safe.) But again, it doesn't follow logically any of the Bad Things Jack has done since becoming soulless. Far from either a misguided attempt at morality or a teenager being stupid trying to impress his friends, Jack kills Mary accidentally when he loses control of his powers during a little kid meltdown after Mary decides to tell Sam and Dean that Jack's powers are becoming violent and out of control.

When he can't bring Mary back, he goes to Duma for ... bucklemming logic reasons. And she tells him Sam and Dean will be happy if he does Good Things like make new angels for heaven and torture nonbelievers. So that's at least an attempt to go back to the snake logic, but it still doesn't make any sense because in two whole seasons of spending time with them and their loved ones, Jack has never seen Sam, Dean, or Cas do or say anything to suggest that they are ok with 1) more angels and 2) people being killed or tortured for nonbelief in God or the supernatural. (also chilling is the fact that the minister who jack curses with boils or whatever they were actually DOES believe in God and angels, he's just skeptical of jack, making this an ego thing for jack.)

The season finale has Jack doing the most interesting thing he does while soulless which is make it so that no one in the world can lie. I ... feel like this was the kind of thing they should have done more of with Jack.

Anyway, there's a big argument between our three mains over whether to kill Jack, with Dean being on the Kill Jack side and Cas being on the Don't Kill Jack side and Sam being Resolutely Silent on the matter either because he's trying to take his time coming up with a solution because he's learned his lesson from half his people getting killed by Michael earlier this season, or because Dabb forgot he was there, it's honestly a toss up. When Cas catches up with Jack, Jack tells him, "I know you love me, I just don't care." Uh ... if being soulless means Jack doesn't care that Castiel, the person he considers his father and who he instictively awoke in the Empty when he was two weeks old, loves him, then why the fuck would he care what three random ass teenagers thought of him???? Why would he care that Mary was about to tell Sam, Dean and Cas she thought something was wrong with him???

But character consistency and logical plotlines are not the point. The point is to make Jack screw up so many times that it drives Dean to the point of almost killing him, but couching it all under the "excuse" of Jack being soulless so that ultimately, the problem is actually Dean and his Anger Issues.

And this is why I have problems with Jack.

#supernatural #anti jack kline #i mean it's not really anti jack it's more like 'here are some problems i have with jack and the way the writers handled him' #which is different but i always hate it when i'm into a thing and someone starts explaining how it's Problematic Actually #so i tagged it anti jack kline so people who don't want to see it can skip it #to be clear #i'm not anti jack i just wish his story had been handled really differently

[drei-satzzeichen]

haha rip me habe dir echt das worst possible foto geschickt, aber gut. finde, das ist guter diskurs hier. wenn sich nur 1x die autoren so ausgiebig damit beschäftigen würden, hätten wir solche probleme gar nicht :D ich glaube, so spät im canon kann man sowieso nichts mehr reißen, aber wir können uns ja alle auf wahlweise "er bleached sich die haare blond" oder "er färbt die halt dunkel" einigen :D

Alles gut, ich konnte es ja lesen xD

Aber ja, manchmal holen die Autoren Details hervor, wo man sich denkt "okay du kennst dich aus mit dem canon" und dann machen sie wieder was, wo man nur den Kopf schütteln kann...

Genau, entweder gebleichte Haare (passt ja auch bestens zu meinem MGK-als-Skinny-fancast) oder er hat sie für Zeichen der Schlangen gefärbt weil... er und Sheila eh schon dabei waren falsche Fährten zu legen? Und die Jungs auf die Art nicht gleich bei der Beschreibung an ihn gedacht haben? (Oder das Licht auf der Party war schlecht, da kann straßenköterblond schon mal dunkel aussehen! xD)

#it's def been a fun hunt for details! #und dass ich dadurch verleitet worden bin mir zeichen der schlangen zu kaufen? umso besser! #talk #german #ask #anonymous #honestly man werfe mal einen blick in 'das schwarze nest' (auch buchna!) das zeugt von soviel kenntnis der alten fälle #aber vielleicht hat er auch bloß die gelegenheit genutzt seinen headcanon zu kanonisieren 🤷‍♂️ #that's it for today with the long talky posts for today promise #any other asks get scheduled for tommorrow

[birb-tangleblog]

Rise of Flynn Rider - THOUGHTS

THE PROMISED LONGER POST ON THE RISE OF FLYNN RIDER- spoiler warning!

Ok so first off, a very brief summary: the book centers on Eugene and Arnie (Lance), childhood best friends. The orphanage they've grown up in is financially struggling, under threat by a crooked tax collector, and they're both aging out of the system; the only clue Eugene has to his parents is a letter from the woman who left him there, which is signed with a ~mysterious symbol~. When a traveling circus run by the Baron (yes, that Baron) passes through town and Eugene learns of a possible lead on his past, the two boys reinvent themselves, join up, and eventually end up entangled in a scheme to steal from the King and Queen of Corona. 

I won't lie, I enjoyed this one a lot- it was a fun read, very cozy to curl up with, and even with some contradictions, it felt like a novel that was derivative of the series and set in that world. There are a lot of cameos and references, enough that I think most TTS fans will find something they like to nibble on.

Like I said in my earlier post abt the prologue and first few chapters, I'm so happy that Lance got a role alongside Eugene- he's definitely a secondary character to Eugene’s main, and he does get sidelined somewhat, but it's charming to see his friendship with Eugene and his growing passion for cooking. 

'I didn't expect anything, so I'm more delighted and pleasantly surprised than genuinely unhappy with the execution' is a running theme with this book for me and basically the tl;dr of this write-up.

There are soo many cameos and little treats- I get the impression Calonita didn't have the most complete knowledge of the series, but her chats with Chris and interest in the series’ writing definitely show. King Edmund, the Stabbingtons, all of the pub thugs, Weasel, Stalyan, and the Baron all make appearances, and we get cameos from Cap, Maximus, Pascal's mother, and even Cass gets a name drop. Several series-exclusive locations are also mentioned by name- Vardaros, the Spire, and the Forest of No Return.

I'm not immune to the fannish hit of 'hey! I understand that reference!' and I really enjoyed hunting for easter eggs, so even if the presence of the pub thugs in the Baron's crew, or the boys stumbling on Rapunzel's tower in one scene and making nothing of it (yea that happened) is a lil questionable, it made me smile and I can't be mad.

I would just describe this book as 'comfy'.

(That said, I'm a little unsure who all those references are for- I feel like if you hadn't seen the series, you'd lack context and some details would be meaningless, but if you had, I think you might long for more depth and exploration...)

Structure & Progression

Here's the part where I start criticizing the book aimed at middle and elementary schoolers lmao

It's a v short book, but the plot progression still feels a little scattered- it didn’t feel quite like a heist OR a mystery. The subplot that takes up a lot of focus is actually interpersonal conflict between Lance and Eugene- and they reconcile, but not after spending much of the book in a standoff due to a misunderstanding/'liar revealed' trope.

One of Eugene's motivations for joining the circus is spotting a man with a mark on his arm that matches the one from his letter working there, and believing he'll be able to learn more abt his parents from him. He doesn't disclose this to Lance right away, and when it comes out later on, he's upset that Eugene didn't tell him- he feels tricked, and like Eugene's prioritizing his biological family over their bond. I had a hard time with this, b/c I honestly think Eugene could've literally said to Lance, 'hey, joining this circus is a great opportunity to travel, make money, send some back to the orphanage, AND I found something about my parents, will you come with me?' and Lance still would've jumped on it. Later on, there's also another similar miscommunication that deepens the rift. 

It feels like manufactured drama, and I would've loved a book of the two of them just being buds, bouncing off each other, and trying to unravel the mysteries of the DK symbol and the Baron's ulterior motives together. Lance's fears of being left behind by his friend absolutely could've surfaced without the misunderstandings, especially the closer they got to the truth. (And I don't think that'd have been dissimilar to the unused 'Trial' episode concept and flashback.)

The pacing itself... meanders. After the boys complete an initiation mission to get a hold of a special key for the Baron, time passes (two weeks in-story) and there's some slice of life as they learn the ropes, get inducted into a lifestyle of thieving (it’s revealed the circus is a front for a crime ring), and get to know the Baron's crew.

I liked these parts and would've kept them in a longer book! But maybe there could've been some fine-tuning here so big events (Eugene stealing for the first time, the heist, the meeting with the mysterious Man with the Mark) weren’t so one-and-done. There are several points where nothing's really happening because the characters can't quite connect with each other, or they're waiting around for an opportunity passively, and that makes for a frustrating exp for me as a reader.

There were also lot of elements I thought were getting set up to come into play later, but not a lot of follow through? The folk hero Lance Archer is mentioned several times and has wanted posters, but we never meet him in the flesh. The Man with the Mark is revealed to be a former member of the Brotherhood(!) named Vedis(!!), but he isn't seen again after Eugene speaks with him... once. (More on this later this post is getting so long omg) 

The Baron’s plan is revealed to be stealing a reward offered for the lost princess when it’s on display to the public during a festival. Eugene and Lance balk b/c stealing doesn’t sit well with them, especially when it’s from what are ultimately a family trying to find their lost child- they decide to do the right thing by foiling the scheme/stealing it back and returning it to the royals. It goes a bit pear-shaped and they’re caught, but are forgiven and face no consequences after explaining, other than being ousted from the circus/crime ring and making enemies of the Baron. Eugene hasn’t given up on finding the DK, but he realizes he already has a family in Lance, and that’s the most important thing; the two resolve to travel the world and have adventures together.

I want to make another post on it, but at the least it feels like a foregone conclusion given we know ‘Flynn Rider’ goes on to become a renown thief who steals the crown of the lost princess- that’s literally the plot of the movie, and being a dashing rogue is Flynn’s defining trait- so even aside from questionable ideas about wealth, class, and morality, the novel’s ending doesn’t fit what’s firmly established about his character, and I think big fans of Eugene might have an even harder time with that then me. 

(I’m very suspicious that there might’ve been some executive meddling in an attempt to soften young Eugene’s character, and send a more palatable/upstanding message to children- it feels like Disney editing the old SW films to show Han didn’t shoot first.)

It’s def one of those novels where you can take some elements you like and leave others, but overall I’d still rly rec it for series fans! I’ve been buzzing and what-iffing about it for a few days, and I got some tasty tidbits on the characters and nods to the series, which is exactly what I wanted out of it.

And maybe it’s a funky take, but honestly I want to think of this book as the beginning of an alternate timeline where Lance and Eugene got out of crime earlier, Eugene got a clue abt his heritage by chance, and it changed his course. I think embracing the retcons and contradictions to canon makes for an interesting angle, and you’ll enjoy it more if you don’t take it too seriously. 

#OKAY PHEW GOD took me way too long to post this #I'd consider this a general reaction/impression and overview #and I have more written that I want to sort out into posts abt Eugene's char AND my thoughts on Vedis as a Brotherhood Stan™ #if I included it here it'd have been like... another 1k words lmfao #hopefully I can post those in the next day or so! #I have no idea how to structure proper reviews man I just want to yammer #I'm honestly just having fun reacting to smth new again C: #the rise of flynn rider #text post #my post #eugene #lance

[sanchoyo]

danny phantom season 2, eps 1-5 thoughts! opening the new season with episodes like these kinda blew me away. we had multiple serious episodes INCLUDING a two parter!! also, valerie :)

see prev episode thoughts in this tag <3

-I don't know what I expected s2 to open with. but danny portal incident in more detail was not it. (also, I hate to break it to you, sam, but danny's parent's bigass ghost hunting rv def chugs more gas than those vehicles, lmao. unless it runs on ectoplasm or something...)

-WHY WAS DESIREE IN THE SEWER? HAVING TEA WITH IT DOWN THERE?? Her making the giant cow come alive is a boss move, we've almost had all of my fav animals as ghosts now <3 I also don't like how sam was expecting danny to just, haunt the place so the cars wouldn't get sold? I KNOWWW I know she's 14 (and I had a very annoying phase like this, I think I mentioned in a previous post, I GET IT) but they're HIS powers, and messing with (1) dealership will not really put a dent in sales overall because they can just move the cars to another sales lot, and it certainly wont change the industry anyway, it's more of a minor annoyance for (1) location. Also, usually people who work at car sales places work on commission, so if they dont make a sale, they don't have money to pay bills, or eat. sam baby if u wanna be an activist you need to like, actually look into these things. with as much money as her parents have, she could be doing a lot..more useful things for causes she cares about? it's frustrating to see someone with resources who doesn't know how to use them. but shes 14 so again. cannot be really upset :/

-IS THIS A PREDATOR VS TERMINATOR VS FREDDY KRUEGER MOVIE BUT THEYRE ALL WOMEN?? you know, sam is so right to be excited about this. /I/ want to see this movie. that rules

-paulina inviting danny and friends to her quinceañera, aw! even if it is just to get phantom to show up :') and there'll be a meteor shower, and we KNOW danny wants to be an astronaut!! there's not a meteor shower every night!! the tickets are non-refundable, but..she's rich? like. gotta agree with danny, they never get invited!! I KNOW it's the principle of keeping promises, but if she was that upset, she should've said something. directly. I hated how she was like, passive aggressive about it through the episode, like you SAID IT WAS FINE, THAT YOU'D GO TO THE PARTY TOO. MOVIES SHOW FOR A FEW WEEKS IN THEATERS. IF YOU HAD A REAL PROBLEM YOU NEED TO TALK ABOUT IT. WE'VE HAD THIS PROBLEM BEFORE, SAM. YOUR FRIENDS. ARE NOT. MIND READERS.

-MR. LANCER GOING AFTER THE GHOST WITH THE FIRE EXTINGISHER LMAO

-this outfit is everything . anytime the show does an over the top cutesty pink outfit i WANT IT. it looks like shit I wear JKASDHF I HAVE a bow like that and a pink sweater. I need leg warmers </3

-SAMS GOTTA RE-HALF-KILL HIM??? thats fucked up. but also, he finally got his logo!! it took until s2!!! this episode was lowkey very fucked and I felt like it glossed over a lot. does sam have guilt about like. kinda KILLING HIM?? I know, he also agreed and walked into the portal. but. she made the choice to redo it SO quickly (even if it was because someone had to beat desiree) and danny, during their fight, brought up a lot of stuff sam's done in the past, meaning he was holding onto those memories and resentment was building. (I KEEP SAYING HE LOWKEY NEEDS THERAPY, BUT I THINK MOST EVERYONE IN THIS SHOW KINDA DOES) which...is a red flag? and then they didnt even GO to the party URGH I know she tried to make up for it, but it really felt like Sam fucked up and barely faced any consequences and got everything she wanted in the end. I KNOW it's a kids show obv they aren't going to go too in depth, and she undid the damage, kinda, but...I DUNNO how to articulate it but it rubbed me the wrong way.

-but on a note about desiree, her powers of wishes were STRONG ENOUGH TO ERASE NOT JUST THEIR MEMORIES, BUT DANNY'S POWERS?! fuck, if I was danny I'd be like, trying to make friends with her. I know they always have horrible side effects as most genie-granted wishes do, but...c'mon, I'd at least TRY to be like 'I wish no ghosts would hurt anyone in my town' or 'I wish vlad would lose his ghost powers forever no matter What and also forget about my mom' LIKE. SHIT DESIREE IS SO POWERFUL. rewriting reality powerful, basically!! appreciate her. respect her.

-aww, sam helping tucker pass the nurse's office so he wouldn't see because he's afraid of medical stuff? very sweet. I also don't like medical stuff, I've gotten a lot better at handling it tho. but seeing blood and needles still makes me feel lightheaded x_x

-FOLEY, BY TUCKER FOLEY. I want to make my own perfume, that's so cool. even if his first attempt isn't good, he's pretty consistently shown to have an inventor/entrepreneur streak in the show, so like. I can see him inventing or making something (or several somethings) that make him $$$ when he grows up :) proud of my creative son

-I know the 'creepy abandoned hospital on the edge of town' is a joke and the creepy hospital trope is so Worn Out, but in my town we actually DO have a hospital like that! my dad was born in it, but its not in use and hasn't been for, like, 20 years! it needs to be torn down but I think the city doesn't wanna pay the money. the inside is horrible, spray painted and broken glass and shit everywhere. but there's still like, rusty equipment and fucking DOLLS all over the place. the cops drive by it pretty frequently to make sure no one is like, breaking in. (because of water damage, some of the areas really aren't safe. also, asbestos, but people still go in anyway) but also, some of my town was used in a filming for a stephen king show. So it's lowkey spooky all over. just a fun personal tidbit :) to lead into saying, any hospital abandoned for any period of time is NOT safe to quarantine these kids in JKSAHDKF like I KNOW it's a ghost trying to do this, but NONE of these parents are even like, 'well, why dont we keep them in the regular, working hospital'....YIKES. this hospital looks pretty accurate to the one in town. grungy and spooky.

-fentons are tax evaders confirmed by jack's fear of being audited, lol no one is surprised

-ghost sickness via ghost bugs. horrifying concept. I actually expected it to be a new villain, not dr. spectra again! this is a very elaborate scheme. her new form rules, love the new costume. the way none of the bg kids seem to recognize her as their old school councilor. did we just forget about that completely?

-dash watching romance movies in the fucked up ghost hospital. same.

-'oh please, you're ghosts, do you have any idea what YOU smell like?' no, tucker, what DO ghosts smell like? I genuinely didn't know they would even have a smell, I actually want to know now.

-it feels like a while since we've seen jazz!! i was happy to see her again, even if she was a head in a jar for most the episode. I want another jazz-focused ep!!

-we finally see danny doing space-related stuff!! him and his friends stargazing to open ep 3 of s2. cute :) until, GHOST PIRATES!!!!! ...ghost pirate captain is a small child?? VOICED BY TAYLOR LAUTNER???

-oh, the easy listening is ember's song instrumental slowed. 'vapor drone' THEY VAPORWAVED HER!!! ember in a pirate outfit tho >>>>. and the cruise being called m.bersback JKASDHJK. ember adopting a little pirate brother is also pretty cute. concerning this teen and little kid have such bad opinions of adults, like, who hurt you?? (how did you DIE ALSO?? im always lowkey curious about that. we know desiree died at an old age, but her ghost form is young, probably mid-20s, so I wonder how that sort of thing works...its a more mental thing, isn't it?) but ghost team-ups are always cool to see, even if ember bailed after danny took her guitar. I guess she probably thinks youngblood can handle it (which, he's been owning danny this far in the ep, so...fair)

-tucker got that sponsorship from nasty burger for their radio!!! again, opportunistic money maker king, love to see it!!!

-danny taking control of the kids SO FAST. he makes a pretty great leader. no one is surprised, im pretty sure I said I think he's the most mature of the trio, once again, correct, because he's taken on so much responsibility already. all the teens suiting up in the jumpsuits to go save the adults and taking the ship over with a BLIMP. OKAY LETS GO. this feels like it should be a mid finale or straight up finale.

-...speaking of finales. why is ep 4-5 of s2 combined into a 50 minute episode? I havent even clicked play and im concerned. weird placement, like, this season JUST started and we're getting a two parter? okay...why are the episodes placed like this? why not put this at episode 10 or something, for a mid-season thing?

-this is also a cute dress. possibly my fav dress so far. can her parents give ME cute dresses, I'LL wear them.

-it turns out the castle fright knight was in is called pariah's keep and there's something worse than fright knight in there! lovely! fuck off vlad wtf are you doing <3 your hubris <3 is going to literally get you killed <3 'ring of rage' and 'crown of fire' are great names tho. ...vlad turning into a super polite guy when he was scared of mr. pariah was hilarious. and fright knight doing the same...I mean, it makes sense, he's a knight, he serves a king? happy to see fright knight again either way :) vlad telling him to call him tho, lmfao. you WISH HE WOULD. (I wish hed call me, too. 😔)

-so...jack being genuinely concerned about vlad...maddie really didn't tell him what happened at the cabin, did she. damn. if I was her id immediately come home and be like 'YOU WONT BELIEVE THIS SHITTTT THIS CREEPY GUY--' like, I feel like that stuff you need to tell your partner!!! I know she didnt want Jack to think she was an irresponsible parent putting danny in danger at that time, but STILLLL. maddie spilling boiling tea on him. get his ass. how is jack this oblivious to his wife's discomfort with vlad!! ughhh

-fenton wipe (tm). trademarked toilet paper.

-DANNY AND VALERIE BEING FRIENDS??? :D that was a cute moment. 'hey val <3' and 'if you like him like him, make a move, or someone else will ;)' at sam...damn!! I love her. valerie go for it girl!!! I hate how sam and tucker treat val also, like I GET IT YOURE PROTECTIVE AND DONT TRUST but if anything him befriending valerie will help when she finds out or he tells her like I feel like she'll be more understanding that they think! ALSO I feel like her reason for not liking ghosts is valid, like you haven't really explained the full story to her anyway! she doesn't seem to have any other friends after being booted from the a-listers so im like :( but seeing them kick butt together again was nice <3

-the ghosts all RUNNING FROM PARIAH DARK IS NOT GOOD, I thought he sent them to attack or something, but no. why doesn't someone just tell desiree 'hey i wish pariah dark would die' lol. once again I think she can solve every problem <3 but seeing all the enemies in one place, being civil and hiding together? love it.

-you just know danny's gonna have to clean up vlad's stupid mess. also, jack being willing to put on the ectoskeleton pants to help maddie, as soon as vlad heard it could kill him, he suggested jack do it instead of helping maddie himself? this is why jack got the girl, my man.

-ghost skeletons. how do you end up as a skeleton ghost in your afterlife instead of a humanoid like most the ones we've seen? lmao

-the ghosts just making new homes in various stores. I'd totally be setting up in an expensive clothing store if I was a ghost.

-valerie's dad is possibly the most useful adult so far, with that ghost shield expansion!!! and valerie saving vlad and danny, even tho shes been thru it already, shes still so good!!! this family rules.

-danny: *gently caresses valerie* :)

-*then he immediately TELLS HER DAD ON HER. and his first response is 'are you okay?' :'( such a good dad...

-*me every time fright knight breathes* youre doing SO great sweetie :)

-the fenton suit thing is so silly looking. does anyone take this thing seriously

-ALL THE GHOSTS FIGHTING WITH DANNY <3 AAAAA. and the fact that pariah isn't perma-defeated, but just locked away again. yikes. he'll probably get out again, won't he? it wasn't too clear, but if vlad DID make a pact with fright knight, I am rabid. I will beat vlad to death with the fenton bat (tm). YOU DONT DESERVE A COOL KNIGHT.

-valerie being direct with sam and challenging her? kinda love that, even tho I normally don't like 'catfight' type situations. because sam has been very passive aggressive about it which is annoying. valerie knows wtf she wants and wasn't even embarrassed to tell sam, but she did tell her, giving sam time to make her own move! and sam denied it and got embarrassed/mad! and sam did have a chance when danny was about to go off and fight, and she hesitated and didn't tell him. I feel like she's hesitating because they're friends and it might make it weird between the trio (poor tucker would be third-wheeling) but if u snooze u lose, u gotta GO after what u WANT girl. smh this is a No Tsundere Zone. 😤

#sanchoyorambles #dp thoughts #danny phantom

[jq37]

The Case File – Mice and Murder Ep 3

The Case of the Curious Clues

Before we start, a quick plea to Grant O’Brien: Please stop finding clues. I can only take notes so fast. You’re killing me Grant. Moving on...

We start off this episode with yet another flashback, this time to the final confrontation of Sly and his supposedly dead arch nemesis Fletcher Cottonbottom at Reichenbunny Falls (...Brennan please). Fletcher was using a local castle as a storage center for munitions but Sly tipped off the cops before they could be moved. They do some repartee back and forth before Fletcher, the madman, handcuffs them together and jumps off the edge. They hit the water but Sly is able to lockpick himself out and escape while Fletcher disappears beneath the waves. 

You know what I got from that story? No body.

Anyway, we jump back to the present where there *is* a body, Squire Badger’s specifically. Everyone in the room who isn’t a PC thinks that this must either be the work of ghosts or Mrs. M who was the only person in the room when it happened (allegedly). 

This is a crucial time for clue gathering and Brennan keeps everyone in initiative for investigative purposes. Now, *so much* stuff happens here that I’m not going to recap every single detail--just the major clues and the things that seem relevant. I’m serious, this is like the volume of info we usually get in the once per season later game lore dump ep but it’s episode THREE.

Daisy tries to find a secret door but critically fails. She clocks Gangie, a fellow criminal, and in the moment Rekha and Katie decide that they prob have worked together in the past even though they are very different kinds of criminals. 

Buck, who is outside listening to what’s going on in the room notices that his ankle knife is missing which is Concerning considering a man was just knifed to death. 

Sly has Lars guard the door (he opens it and Buck is discovered, whoops) and then rolls a NATURAL 20 plus NINE to investigate so Brennan just has to tell him literally everything. RIP to him and me. Anyway, here’s the rundown (along with some of the stuff other ppl got):

Mrs. M’s hands are covered in blood but she couldn’t have done it. Based on her personality for one and for other reasons we’ll get to.

The wound is much messier than it would be if a person stabbed themselves typically.

There is a note in Squire Badger’s handwriting that says “Sylvester Cross I am afraid” No indication of if that was the whole message or if he got interrupted (maybe Buck could figure it out with his handwriting checking skills). Daisy from across the room clocks that Sly’s name is written on the paper but can’t read the rest.

The knife is a hunting knife with a pronghorn handle--an animal not common in England but very common in Texas (and Buck is sweating obv).

There is a slight layer of charcoal type dust on everything on the big resolute desk in the room (which makes sense, ash from the fireplace) but there is parchment type dust on the bust of Barkus Aurelius (OK, that one’s good) on the table and that’s the only place that dust is. Ian later notices that the date on the bust is wrong. 

Speaking of, the desk (which we learn later was put in and taken out of storage once Loan Hall was modernized) is bolted to the ground and a lot of stuff has been thrown off it as if by a powerful force but Sly notices that it’s just the metal stuff like things made of silver or with screws. Stone things like the bust and other non-metal things have stayed put. Plus he smells ozone. This was the work of magnets, not ghosts, he concludes. And, for the record, Grant figured this out himself!

Mrs. M’s eyes are rapidly dilating. She is questioned about what happened and she says that she was told she was fired and would receive a small pension. 

(Not a part of Sly’s clue dump but Buck rolls a 24 with disadvantage to persuade everyone he didn’t do it but then 2 nat 1s in a row to see if Harding--who said he was standing outside the door--is suspect. Buck thinks he’s at most a stooge but he did roll a nat 1 so who knows?)

Anyway, back to Mrs. M. Gangie fully believes Mrs. M is innocent and scared. She doesn’t quite remember what happened for a couple of seconds in there and it’s clear this is not the first time she’s had missing time. Sly calls Longfoot (the bunny photographer) over to take a picture of Mrs. M which everyone is a little appalled at until they realize he’s making a point. When the flash goes off, she bugs out like she did in episode 1 and forgets that the picture was ever taken. Sly then has Dr. Magpie list the symptoms of epilepsy. It seems that Mrs. M had an episode triggered by the flash she mentioned seeing and then lost time. It’s possible that what she thought she saw after that she didn’t actually see.

[While Sly is monologuing this Rekha texts Brennan and gets a 17 to swipe the “I am afraid” note. Sly doesn’t notice.]

So if it wasn’t her, then who was it? There’s only one door into the study and anyone who walked in would have to have walked past Mr. Harding, Shellcrest, Calliope, and Tabitha (who is having a marvelous time being in the midst of so much drama). Ah, but who said there was only one door? Sly has Harding pull a sconce and a SECRET DOOR OPENS! Woo! Finally! It’s a classic bookshelf one that opens into the hallway and there is some extremely fine crushed glass under the door. Hmm.

Sly clocks that there is something under the desk but we don’t know what it is because Brennan texts it to him and it’s redacted. There are actually a couple of redacted texts that go around this ep so we are def missing information. 

OK, that’s more or less everything. 

Sly notices that the page is missing and Grant gasps while Rekha does an excellent job of pretending like she doesn’t even remember what paper is being talked about. Constance asks if it’s possible that Mrs. M totally made up the memory because of her epilepsy and between Dr. Magpie and Sly they determine that that’s uncommon but possible. Dr. Magpie says that everyone should leave so he and Sly can examine the body and Sly says that someone should watch Gangie at all times. 

At this point, Harding and Gilfoyle (the butler) say they should establish where everyone was at the time of the murder. A lot of the staff and guests have solid alibis cause they were in big groups/cleaning up together. But the PCs were off alone (or with each other) and had reasons to want to guy dead so they’re prime suspects. Sly even admits that he’s one too. Also everyone dogpiles Ian because Raph makes it so fun. 

Harding mentions the letter that was given to Buck (the one selling his shares in BB and giving voting writes to his rival Josiah) and asks him to read it. Buck reads it and gives a streamlined version of the truth, saying everything except for the part with the proxy vote. With a 26 he is able to allay everyone’s suspicions for now, but now he’s purposefully hidden the truth in a way that can be readily called out if anyone sees the letter or the contract which he resolves to find. 

Buster distracts the group so Daisy can “check the body for a pulse” aka: check the body for the contract. She doesn’t find a it but does find a key attached to a piece of red silk--something that would be weird for him to be carrying around instead of his valet. She figures this must open whatever locked drawer the contract is in and swipes it but Sly clocks her stealing it (his perception ties her sleathiness but an earlier Bless from Ian tips him over the edge--poetic).  

Calliope says that everyone is kinds suspect, including Sly, but *someone* has to solve this and Sly’s their best bet so everyone should just stay put and they can guard the exits. The butler says that, besides the front door, there are some towers that poke up above ground and a servant's exit/entrance by the elevator in the kitchen wing but they can lock down both and have someone guard the front doors. 

The butler is like, lmao yeah Sly I know you didn’t do it and I’m not gonna stand guard here but you know, everyone is keeping an eye on y’all. And then he leaves the PCs, Mrs. M, Constance, and Dr. Magpie in the room with the body. 

Lars is about to go watch the kitchen staff but, before he goes, Sly says to him that he saw Cottonbottom and is obviously quite scared. Gangie, who used to work for the guy, overhears and asks what’s going on. Sly assumes Gangie is playing coy but rolls high enough to know that he isn’t. He saw a starkly white Cottonbottom and one of his known conspirators doesn’t know he’s back? Perhaps it was a ghost after all. 

Case Notes

My 2 fave bits of this episode were “bad to bad bad bad” (and the further riffing) and Daisy throwing increasingly bigger books at Sly.

Even with a Nat 1, Sly gets a 16 on Investigation. Wild. 

I don’t think Rekha got enough props for her “Cross examination” line so I’m mentioning it here.

Brennan said the ozone question was still open--but I assumed it was like the electricity smell from an electromagnet. That would make sense, right? Maybe he meant they hadn’t found the source of it specifically yet?

Brennan says Buck’s knife is a pronghorn knife. I assume they’re made from the animal’s horns? Even if they’re the kind that fall off every season, is that weird? Or is it just like human hair wigs? Also, does this world have leather?

I love that the dice keep supporting the narrative that Daisy simply cannot get her shit together when she’s with Sly because he distracts her too much. Delicious. Their whole relationship is delicious. 

OK, I am a tiny bit suspicious of Calliope. It’s partially the way she took control of the situation near the end and partially the fact that she doesn’t seem like the kind of person who would be involved in this which would make her heel turn delicious. No hard evidence and obv she couldn’t be the person who actually stabbed a guy but idk. Just spitballing. I’m very curious about whether we’ve met everyone we’re going to meet more or less or if there are still outside people/hidden inside people. Because, in real life, a murderer could be literally anyone but in a story, you can’t just introduce a new villain all of a sudden at the end. Bad storytelling. Weak payoff. We’ll see how things start to pan out. 

#dimension 20 #dimension 20 spoilers #mice and murder #mice and murder spoilers #the case file

[luci-cunt]

Pls tell us about the batshit dystopian trashfire xD

kajsd;flkadsj hello I love you so much (this is so long I’m so sorry I got excited XD)

ok so like, for the tiniest bit of context: this takes place quite a ways in the future, global warming has flooded the world and now it’s made up of 3 kinds of people: rich, poor, and pirates. The poor live in two kinds of cities: 

“floating cities” aka massive boats that actually move around. The ppl who live on these usually fish for a living, or take up jobs scraping the bottom of the massive city/ maintaining the sunken part of the ship. 

and “docks” aka grounded platforms built over now sunken mountains. These are mostly ppl who work by processing the fish/ goods the floating cities give them or mining/ scavenging.

These two have a symbiotic relationship and work together. Docks give fishers supplies they need like metal for hooks or ship repair stuff and the fishers give the Docks food/ deep sea supplies or transportation. Usually Docks and Floats will form highly exclusive relationships, i.e: one dock will only trade with one float and they do not get along with any other docks/ floats. 

Rich people meanwhile live on “Sun Cities” which are actual ships that float in the sky and they do not interact with people on the surface other than deliverers (ppl, usually from Dock cities, that transport supplies up to the Sun Cities/ transport ppl down or up to them)

And finally the pirates, which are pretty self explanatory, they almost always take over any bits of land that survived and make their own little pirate towns. 

With that all out of the way here’s another fun thing!!! So since everyone’s pretty broken up there’s not “government.” The individual cities kind of act like their own independent countries, with their own rules/ shit, so basically if you leave a city you’re in no-mans land where literally anything can happen with no consequences. 

WHICH IS WHY!!!! The Hunts happen. 

The Hunts are these big events usually held by pirates, who maintain massive “biomes” just for these purposes. Sometimes they’re sections of water or sometimes they’re islands. The hunts have varying rules but most of them go like this: there’s 1 Fox and 4 Hounds, the Hounds have to hunt the Fox while they try to complete various goals around the biome/ survive the Hounds hunting them. Goals are usually things like “find clues to uncover a trophy, then escape.” You can’t escape without this item also. 

Most hunts are volunteer events, aka ppl choose to participate because you can win a fuck ton of money and respect from pirates if you win. Though--as a Hound if you win (by killing the Fox before they manage to escape with the item) you split the prize money 4 ways, but if you’re the Fox you get all the prize money, plus the trophy, PLUS the boat you escaped on. 

Another thing: lots of people volunteer, so there’s a slim chance you’ll get to participate--but, if you forfeit your prize money you can be guaranteed a spot on the next Hunt.

Now, this has been mainly a pirate thing, but rich people got word of it and thought it sounded like fun, so now they hold an “Official Hunt” every year, with a massive money prize. 

(this will all be important later, for now tho--)

Here’s some characters: 

the MC: who I don’t have a name or gender for XDD so I’m just gonna call them MC. They live on a Float and work as a fisherman. They’re living with their father and sibling(?) [again sorry this is still very much in the workshop XDD I don’t know who these characters are for sure yet XD]. Their dad is kind of an asshole, but he’s also super old and basically helpless, so MC and their sibling work/ take care of him. MC’s sibling also works as one of the people who maintains the bottom of the boat, which is super dangerous so you get paid a lot of money to do it, so they’ve been fine so far. Unfortunately at the beginning of the story the Sib gets injured, and then fired, and MC’s fishing job will def not cover the medical bills for both Dad and Sib so--you guessed it--they apply for the “Official Hunt.”

Details on MC: they joined the Hunt one: because they want to help their sib but also two: because they want to rub a victory in their dad’s face. What I’m saying is: MC is not exactly heroic, they’re an asshole who saw and opportunity and took it and I love them. 

Lynx: I also don’t have a gender for them, and they’re supposed to be pretty mysterious so all you need to know is that they’ve won the Official Hunt as a Hound 4 times in a row, and have always forfeited their money to be a Hound again the next year. They got the nickname “Lynx” because they’re really fucking good at hunting foxes and known for being merciless. They’re very tempered, barely says more than like, two words in casual conversation and doesn’t really like people. 

Sabertooth: is like Lynx’s partner in crime--they’ve both won 4 hunts in a row and they’ve hunted on the same pack every year, but where Lynx is reserved ST is loud and arrogant. They like the spectacle of the Hunt almost more than the Hunt itself. Basically--they’re a fucking dick. 

Anyways, since this is the “Official Hunt” there’s quite a bit more publicity that goes into it. There’s before and after-hunt interviews/ parties and a lot of rich people oogling over the contestants participating in pre-hunt games like sparring and even mock-hunts where actual foxes and hounds are brought in and given to the contestants and if one of the hounds kills a fox it’s like an omen. (This is also mostly just a way to show off how rich the hosts are, because non-aquatic animals are a luxury.)

Some things to note: there’s actually 2 hunts that happen at the same time during the “Official Hunt” so that if one hunt gets boring the viewers can move to the other hunt. The hunt also takes place on an island, with a big glass wall splitting it in half--one hunt on one side, and another on the other. 

OK I’m so sorry for all this backstory here’s the actual plot akjdsf;lajsdflkj

(one last thing to know): The two foxes get to meet/ know who the other is, and the two packs get to meet/ know who they are from the beginning, but the packs and the foxes are kept separate, each having their own banquet thing, before there’s one big party where everyone is introduced and everyone learns which pack is assigned to which fox. 

Which is why, MC--who’s not one for parties and is just annoyed by all the oogling rich people--slips out for some fresh air and finds a stranger. They chat a bit, find one another kind of interesting. The stranger asks MC why they chose to be a fox of all things, and MC explains that it’s mostly the money, but also--they’ve got a strategy and if they were a Hound it would just make their hands more bloody. 

When the Strangers inquires about said strategy MC keeps it vague but basically says that there’s two kinds of people who Hunt as Hounds: 1. the greedy bastards who know playing the Hound is easier, and just want the money, and 2. the greedy bastards who like the thrill of the hunt and want the money, but also refuse to be prey. Both of these ppl are easy to manipulate, and so all MC has to do is convince at least one of them that if they murder their fellow hounds *before* they kill MC, they’ll get all the prize money to themself, and then MC only has to kill one Hound and escape. 

But the Stranger points out there’s another type of person that choses Hound, and when MC asks what that is, they just walk off. 

Queue the next day, aka the banquet where everyone finds out which pack is hunting which fox and we learn that Sabertooth and Lynx are going to be separated, with each getting their own pack to see who’s the superiors Hound.

This is also where MC realizes that Lynx--aka the bitch who’s been forfeiting all their money just for the chance to hunt over and over again--is the stranger they were talking to last night. 

oops.

Luckily though, MC is assigned to Sabertooth’s pack, and MC’s pretty sure Lynx isn’t going to spill the beans about MC’s plan because they probably want to beat Sabertooth--hopefully.

alkjsd;flajksd this is so long so I’m gonna cut it here but yeah, shenaniganary happens :) XDD

[coffeeandcalligraphy]

Bad Vegetarian | Feeding Habits #1

Hey People of Earth!

As you can see from the title, not only do we have a new series of writing updates, we have a new series of writing updates for a whole new novel that was! not! supposed! to! happen!

For any of my friends who miss Moth Work (aka myself), guess who started writing a sequel literally no one asked. :)

I’ve had ideas for spinoff stories for Moth Work (as if MW wasn’t enough of a spinoff) and was peer pressured into starting this novel by @sarahkelsiwrites​ and I’m really happy about it! I have yet to come up with a title, but the moment I do, shall inform you, but for now, we’re calling this MW2!

This book (if it even ends up being a book) starts with chapter one, Bad Vegetarian. Unlike MW, MW2 starts in Lonan’s POV (not sure I’ll switch but I’m sure it’ll be inevitable), and I’m here for it!

I’ve been wanting to explore Lonan and Eliza’s relationship in more detail since having them come together in MW by complete fluke, and oh! is the tea piping!

This chapter really illustrates how truly dysfunctional this relationship is on both sides. Here’s a break down by scene:

Scene A:

Lonan is paint shopping with Eliza who has just gone vegetarian (which is the def the most normal thing she’s spontaneously done lately). Eliza feels like celebrating by painting their entire kitchen red.

Lonan particularly is drawn to blues, but since this ain’t what Eliza wants, they go with a brilliant red.

Scene B:

Lonan lines the kitchen with painter’s tape as Eliza bothers their neighbours for paint rollers, while trying to convince himself this relationship is still somewhat okay.

While doing this, he gets his weekly call from Unknown Woman who he’s been in contact with for the last few weeks. What for? We don’t know! They talk in code, and he realizes Unknown Woman’s situation is getting worse, and impromptu, tries to do something about it.

Scene C:

Lonan and Eliza bump into each other as he’s exiting the apartment and she’s entering, and have a short, strained conversation about why he’s leaving (she’s not aware of top secret phone calls that make this book feel lowkey like the old dystopians!)

Scene D:

Lonan attempts to drive to Unknown Woman but only knows she lives in Arizona (not great for directions lol). While in the car, he realizes it’s essentially impossible to get there without knowing where he’s going, and eventually gives up and heads home.

Scene E:

TW: blood

Lonan re-enters the apartment only to find Eliza “bleeding” in the kitchen. She’s actually just being wild and this “blood” is wall paint.

Scene F:

If we haven’t already seen the dysfunction, oh does it get worse! As Lonan and Eliza try to have a *moment* Eliza has a conversation by herself and gets a lil gaslighty.

Halfway through this, Lonan gets a phone call from Unknown Woman who we finally find out is his ex-girlfriend Glenne. Sounds like tea but he’s genuinely only helping her out of her toxic situation (which will be clarified later) though Eliza’s skeptical.

This chapter was a lot of fun to write! I wrote a majority of it today, and am really happy to have a *chill* project. While I love my other books (the three I am apparently now working on at once), it’s nice to have a place to dump my ideas with characters I know very well in situations I’m comfortable in whenever I feel like writing but don’t have tons of time/ideas/energy.

Excerpts:

Here are the opening three paragraphs! The first sentence sets up the POV a little weirdly, but I think it works with a later sentence that sort of mimics this “reminder” kind of style:

There are no rules, just remember, Eliza is vegetarian. She’s into earth tones, neutral tones, leafy greens, root vegetables. It’s all new. The day she announced her diet change, she also announced a desire to repaint the kitchen, to fit the new aura, to fit the new ethics, but she wants to paint the kitchen blood red, and Lonan is still a meat-eater. He reminds himself: there are no rules, just remember, Eliza is vegetarian.

In the hardware store he thumbs paint chips. They’re set up in an array, almost like checkers, dissolving in a gradient from reds to purples. Eliza wants red, “Not necessarily earthy, but the root of organism, of life,” so Lonan looks at the blues. They’re all a variant of a seaside theme—Sea Breeze, a cloud-like blue, Beach Umbrella, a wispy aqua, Seafoam Serenade, muted like the soft side of a turquoise. Repainting the kitchen matters little to him, and so do the blues, but the red section, devilish, makes him shuffle his blue deck faster.

Radio from the store’s intercom tins through the speakers, dampened by the hustle of carts, the thud of bodies against the concrete flooring. He holds many cards up to the light, Secret Getaway and Parisian Summer almost the exact shade, but still he flicks through, until half the pile is indistinguishable, and the other half are blues he likes and not reds, like Eliza’s asked.

The next excerpt sort of highlights the last six months of Lonan’s life as he’s been on this whirlwind of keeping up with all the things Eliza has tried. I have added kudzu pudding and other kudzu food just for my pals @sarahkelsiwrites​ and @shaelinwrites​ (rlly want kudzu pudding):

Her sudden vegetarianism is not confusing to him. Eliza tries new things all the time, something he’s learned after living with her for half a year. One time, she brought home four different kinds of dried beans to make into tea, and together they drank it atop the balcony, the Vegas strip across them somehow tasting better. One time, they ate a variety of kudzu foods for a week because Eliza said invasive species had to be killed somehow, and so they spooned kudzu pudding into their mouths, kudzu root powder into their water, kudzu salads with salted almonds. One time, she put them on a warmth ban, and they ate only frozen peas, potatoes, raspberries, turned the thermostat down until every surface crackled. She liked the feeling of subtle frost on the countertops, how it jolted her when she touched it accidentally in the morning. He found her many mornings awake before him, transfixed to the table with both palms soldered to its surface, like she’d forgotten she wasn’t a part of it. One time, she paid to have the furniture in the house rearranged, not good enough for her spirit, and then reverted it two days later. “The couch doesn’t like being so close to the refrigerator,” and he could’ve asked “did you ask it?” but said, “Understandable. It shouldn’t be forced to catch a draft.” So her vegetarianism is normal. Already, she’s switched their meat supply to beetroots, chickpeas, tofu she rips apart bare-handed. For the last three mornings, they’ve both taken a shot of spinach and gingerroot, a liquid that burns to make you feel alive, as if you weren’t already.

The next excerpts kind of surprised me with their amount of humour! Not something I expect from Lonan, but I’m glad he has some sass back lol (CW: some upsetting animal imagery):

There is nothing wrong in this relationship. Everything is Eliza’s new favourite adjective—stunning. Everything is scrubbed with kitchen bleach, glittering like a plasticky pool float in the shallow end, stunning. Everything is planned, put in a calendar, a notebook, a flitter of receipts, but always planned, stunning. Everything is better, even better than better, a better that can only be described as stunning.

Lonan uses this word frequently now, rolling out a strip of blue painter’s tape and trying to find different ways it stuns. Sticks when he sticks, peels when he peels, keeps its edge when it needs to keep its edge, so it’s stunning. The bubble television is turned onto a channel about sheep, and as he lines the baseboards, outlets, catches glances of a sheer buzzing against skin, sometimes a hunting knife slicing until there’s blood. 

Eliza is asking a neighbour for paint rollers because they bought four cans of wall paint, two paint trays, a box of garbage bags, three rolls of painter’s tape, and a small paintbrush each for both of them but forgot the rollers. Stunning.

The following excerpt highlights that Lonan has a cellphone! Is Fostered just a bizarre alternate reality of a time period that doesn’t exist? Perhaps! (CW: some upsetting animal imagery):

Today, they’ll prime the cabinets, the walls, and tomorrow, scroll a coat of red onto both. The kitchen will look more like the inside of an anatomical heart, the sinks and drawers like ventricles, but this is Eliza’s vision—her tastes come alive.

The sheep are being herded by a collie. As Lonan rips another strip of tape with his teeth, he stares at the screen mounted in the corner, at the almost-naked sheep dashing across a field. How many will be slaughtered, he doesn’t know. The narrator must’ve said that, but there is no plan, really, for death. Even for sheep.

He kneels toward the kitchen vent, the tape roll linked around his wrist, and smooths a line of tape down. Eliza doesn’t want to paint the vent—it wouldn’t complete her vision—and so it will remain the original wall colour, a square of cream so worn, it’s almost grey.

Here we have some hints at Eliza’s weirdness:

He straightens and looks at her. She’s bundled in her fur coat even though she has always insisted she’s good at even Vegas’ warm winter. Since going vegetarian, she’s insisted it’s fake, even though he’s read the lining tag—100% mink. He doesn’t know why she’s needed her coat when she’s only walked up a few flights of stairs but doesn’t care to ask.

She approaches him with her thumb out, and when that thumb presses into his eye socket, he flinches.

“What happened here?” she smooths the dip of his under eyes, her fingertips cold. He smells her perfume, different today, always different, a smell like cloves and lavender. “Are you sleeping?” She presses onto her toes, examines the other side, and her frown deepens. “This doesn’t look like eight hours.”

“I’m sleeping,” he says, though they both know this is a lie. It’s taken her two weeks to notice.

“I can run to the pharmacy,” she says. “If you need a refill.”

“I’m sleeping.”

“I didn’t notice this morning—I would’ve given you another energy shot.”

Here’s a line I like because of a) skin and b) sun:

Lonan goes nowhere. This is not his plan. Asphalt whips under the skin of each tire, the setting sun wringing him blind. 

Fully sharing this for the verb zags (and also because I accidentally roast cities tho I love them I am one of these blink-less people):

He doesn’t know where he’s going. Arizona is the only thing he knows about her, doesn’t know if she lives in an apartment, a duplex, a house—fully detached, semi-detached. As he pulls into a residential neighbourhood somewhere along the vague line he’s drawn on the map from Las Vegas to Arizona, he watches for all these options. In the distance, a jogger zags across the street with her golden retriever, children play basketball on a driveway, still in their school uniforms, another woman clips the wilted stems off a magnolia bush. 

It’s when he gets closer to the apartments that the sameness is noticeable. High-rises with pearlescent windows that go pinkish in the sunset—all of them identical. Each building evenly spaced, more like a board game than a place to live. Even the space around each building is the same—the same rose hedges, the same iron fence, the same people bustling in and out, all wearing some variation of the same pantsuit, all holding some other hand—child, partner, lover. The same haircuts, smiles, eyes like marbles, as if there’s a store somewhere that sells copies, a catalogue for eyes that don’t blink. He’s been looking into the sun for too long, there must be a difference, but the longer he looks, the more indistinguishable they become.

To get out of explaining where he wants to go when he and Eliza bump into each other, Lonan says he’s visiting his sister (Reeve), and because she’s iconic and must make an appearance, here’s a line ft. our queen:

He could make the lie true. Reeve is somewhere in the country, he imagines, dancing in a faceless city, living in a motel room, tipping everyone well. 

(^^ all true)

Here we have Lonan identifying with the animals more than anything else for the second time in one chapter (TW for more blood imagery):

Lonan hooks the car keys onto the lanyard by the front door and slings his coat across the couch. The television is set to the same channel as before, though the program has switched from sheep slaughter to birdwatching. On screen, a heron perches by a riverbed, opalescent in the sunshine.

“Did you hurt yourself?” he asks, the heron now frisking up the white bark of a tree. He glances at the fluorescent red dripping between her fingers, pattering against the tile.

“I was opening the paint cans.”

“With a kitchen knife?”

He gestures to the blade on the counter, blood-free, newly sharpened.

“It’s all I had on hand.” She pulls her wrist closer to her, runs her index finger along the injured area.

“It’s clean.”

“I washed it, Lonan.”

This next one has some blood imagery so TW for that!

The heron has moved closer to the riverbed. It watches the water knowingly, its subtle simmer of movement, and after a moment of watching, strikes its beak down so it spears a trout. He misses the part where it eats. Eliza’s clicked off the TV from behind him.

She slams the remote onto the counter so hard, its back clatters off and onto the tile. “I cut my arm with a kitchen knife while opening paint cans. It happens.”

“I don’t see a cut.”

“Why would I make that up?”

“I don’t see a cut.”

She walks toward him. He expects her to shove her wrist in his face, but she doesn’t. She just holds it, some of the blood fluorescing pink, splashes onto her toes.

“You got to see your sister?” she asks.

“She cancelled.”

Eliza clucks her tongue, examining her wrist, and then she extends her arm, revealing the full patch of pale skin gone red.

Lonan takes it, and with his fingernail carves a line through the red to reveal the healthy patch of skin, painted, uncut.

And finally, here’s the last line of this excerpt that essentially explains where the title comes from ft. predator VS prey symbolism:

He’s reminded once more of the heron, how it plunged into the riverbed with ease, and the trout dangling in its beak, its commitment to life most fervent the moment before being consumed. 

So that’s going to be it for this update! I don’t know how frequently I’ll be writing this, but it’s been a lot of fun so far. I’m excited to explore more relationships I haven’t turned over in a while as a little side project while I do other things! Hope y’all enjoyed!

--Rachel

#writing #amwriting #writeblr #writerblr #writingupdates #mothwork #fostered #feedinghabits

[trensu]

Episode 20: The One where WangXiantics becomes W(angst)Xiantics

So we start the episode on a high note by watching wc and jj suffer a mental breakdown

We won’t go into detail bc we don’t actually care about them

We are, however, gonna take the time to admire the cut of wwx’s silhouette as he stands on the rooftop playing his demon flute

For real tho, he’s killin it here (on a rooftop! did i mention that? bc all great scenes happen on rooftops)

Enshrouded in shadow with wisps of resentful energy flowing around his flute as he plays

And the only light on him frames just his eyes, emphasizing his cold focus as he rains terror on the two who hurt his family and destroyed his home

Chills...this is not a guy you want to cross

Okay Plot Stuff happens and wwx is gone by the time JC and LWJ show up at the scene of the crime

More plot stuff

Plot plot, wen qing and jc have a moment and there’s a comb, plot plot

Jc and lwj are hunting down wc and wen zhuliu 

Plot plot plot

They finally find them holed up somewhere, idk where, it doesn’t matter

Jc is about to rush in but lwj, being sensible, stops him and tells him they should observe first

So they sneak onto the roof and watch shit go down through a missing tile

Wc and wzl are there doing stuff that doesn’t matter

But then an ominous breeze picks up and we see black boots slowly start climbing a staircase leading to where wc and wzl are

This kind of echoes lwj’s scene in the last episode, which is GREAT

The steps are not hurried in any way. There’s no rush bc wc and wzl are right where he wants them to be

The “he’ here is revealed to be WWX!!! 

YOU LOOKIN FINEEEE IN THOSE ROBES WWX

(tbh, all of our boys are looking pretty dashing)

(@theuntamednarrator​ and i decided that lwj and jc were probs trying to one up each other in the fashion department bc they wanted to look ESPECIALLY handsome and heroic when they finally find wwx. And no, you cannot change our minds. This is definitely what happened.)

There’s some banter between wzl and wwx that doesn’t really matter except for this gem of a line that is just SO GREAT i can’t NOT include it

Wen zhuliu says something about repaying his debts to wen ruohan

Wwx: why do other people have to pay for your gratitude?

DAAAAAMN BOY

LOOK AT YOU DROPPING THE MIC

WWX whips out his flute and starts to play

Lwj sees all the resentful energy wwx is summoning and his eyes widen (by like, a lot) in shock

A pause here to mention that the lady in red that wwx summons is by far the COOLEST THING EVER (the special effects here are actually special for once lol)

i am very upset we didn’t get to see more of her. 

What the heck wwx, she’s so effective and awesome?? 

And she matches your color scheme perfectly???

And you choose never to summon her again????

What is the matter with you

Do it for the aesthetic if nothing else!

So lwj and jc are just chillin on the roof watching all this go down but then suddenly wen zhuliu attacks wwx and is about to land a hit on him

ofc that’s when lwj chooses to intervene

Our boy straight up punches through the roof so that he and jc land between wzl and wwx

We get to watch jc choke out wen zhuliu with his zidian which is pretty cool

BUT MORE IMPORTANTLY, once this happens, LWJ TURNS AROUND AND FACES WWX FOR THE FIRST TIME IN MONTHS

HE JUST GAZES AT HIM??? 

And jc goes in and has a brotherly reunion with wwx and it’s all sentimental

THE YUNMENG BRO HUG HERE, AHH, MY PRECIOUS YUNMENG BOYS

(Why didn't you return the hug properly wwx why)

The look on LWJ’s face at their reunion is so full of yearning!! 

HE WANTS TO HUG WEI YING TOO. HE’S MISSED HIM SO MUCH, HE NEEDS A HUG FROM WEI YING RIGHT NOW

Ofc that doesn’t happen, and actually after a moment, lwj looks away from the scene as if he realizes he’s intruding on an emotional moment

And here we get some fun Q&A time with wwx!! (and by fun, i mean frustrating and emotionally trying)

Jc: were you really thrown into the burial mounds??

Wwx: if i had been thrown in there, would i be here now? Nobody survives that place

WAY TO NOT ANSWER THE QUESTION

Jc: where did they take you? How’d you escape? Why do you look different??

Wwx: *pointedly does not answer the first two questions* have i really changed??

And then, to further distract from the other questions that he totally ignored...

Wwx: if i told you that i found a special book in a secret cave written by a genius recluse, and then studied it to become super powerful, would you believe me?

Ofc jc just rolls his eyes and starts scolding him which makes wwx grin

Wwx: see, you won’t believe me even if i told you. I’ll tell you more later when we get home

Jc looks at lwj here, who up until now had been silently watching them talk, and then turns his attention back to wwx

Jc: fine, we’ll talk later

THEY’RE PURPOSELY EXCLUDING LWJ AS THOUGH HE HASN’T SPENT THE LAST THREE MONTHS FRANTICALLY SEARCHING FOR WWX TOO, I'M SO UPSET

And here’s where it starts to get super heartbreaking bc this is when lan wangji decides to chime in

Lwj: Wei Ying

Wwx: Lan er-gongzi, or should i say Hanguang-jun

WWX IS ADDRESSING HIM FORMALLY AND I DON’T LIKE IT

SINCE WHEN DO YOU CALL HIM ANYTHING OTHER THAN LAN ZHAN???

LIKE, WWX EVEN DID A LITTLE RESPECTFUL BOW AND EVERYTHING

HE IS DISTANCING HIMSELF FROM LWJ

STOP THAT WWX, STOP THAT RIGHT NOW

LWJ: were you the one that hunted all those wens?

Wwx: so what if i was?

Lwj: why did you give up the sword? Answer me.

Wwx: what if i refuse to answer?

AND HE SAYS THAT WITH A SMIRK, A COLD CURL OF HIS LIPS WHERE IT USED TO BE SO TEASING AND FLIRTY

SOMEONE STAB ME IN THE FACE

Lwj reaches out to grab him in response but wwx completely sidesteps him and even places his demon flute between them!!! WHY IS THIS HAPPENING

WWX: lan zhan (oh so NOW you want to call him by his name), we just reunited after so long and you’re interrogating me? That’s not very nice.

YOU’RE BEING MEAN ON PURPOSE WWX

STOP HURTING LWJ’S FEELINGS

Wwx: it’s been months since the Murder Turtle cave...even if you didn’t cherish our relationship as classmates, you shouldn’t be so mean

HE SAYS THIS WITH A MOCKING SMILE

STOP IT STOP IT STOP IT

HE’S NOT THE ONE BEING MEAN WWX

Lwj does not rise to the bait: Answer me.

Wwx: I did already and you didn’t believe me! I can’t explain so much in so few words

Lwj: Then come to Gusu with me and explain it there.

LWJ ASKS HIM TO COME HOME WITH HIM FOR THE FIRST TIME

IT WON’T BE THE LAST

AND IT HURTS EVERY TIME. 

IT DOESN’T GET BETTER

EVERY INVITATION IS SUPER PAINFUL

Wwx: Gusu? With the 3000 rules? No, i refuse! I prefer yunmeng

I HATE THIS

THIS IS ALL AWFUL

Like, wwx is all pouty when he says this? And before it would’ve been all teasing and cute but instead it’s all cold and mocking aND IT HURTS

Lwj: wei ying, don’t joke around

And he angrily steps towards wwx but jc blocks him with his sheathed sword

With jc between them, wwx asks him, “lan zhan, what do you really want?

HE WANTS TO TAKE YOU HOME AND KEEP YOU SAFE AND LOVE YOU FOREVER

THAT’S WHAT HE WANTS

HE JUST WANTS YOU WITH HIM

GOD DAMN IT

But lwj is bad with words so instead of saying ANY of that he goes

Lwj: wei ying, there will be a price for learning wicked tricks; there’s been no exception in all of history. They will harm your body and mind.

HE’S SO WORRIED FOR WWX

STOP DANCING AROUND THE TOPIC LWJ AND JUST SAY YOU'RE WORRIED

Wwx: i didn’t snatch any souls for my tricks so they’re not wicked. I use talismans and play music, how is that wicked?

WWX YOU’RE COMPLETELY MISSING THE POINT

Wwx: and even if they were wicked tricks, i know myself and my limits

AND HE’S SAYING ALL THIS WITH HIS BACK TURNED TO LWJ

WHY IS THIS HAPPENING

Wwx: as for my temperament...i’m in charge of my own mind and i know what i’m doing

Lwj: there are some things you can’t decide on your own!

Lwj is so so worried, he’s snapping at wwx here. It comes off as angry but it’s not anger, he’s scared for wei ying, he’s distressed!!

Now wwx finally walks back to lwj and faces him head on

Oh man, the way they shoot this scene is intense

They only let you see half of wwx’s face bc the other half is obscured by lwj

Wwx: how do others know my temperament? And why should it be their concern?

Just...those words paired with how we can’t see wwx straight on...it hits you in the gut

bc what he really means is “what do you know about me, outsider?”

Lwj: Wei Wuxian (he snaps at him!!)

NOOO DON’T CALL HIM THAT!! DON'T SAY WUXIAN!! YOU ALWAYS CALL HIM WEI YING!!!

Wwx: Lan Wangji (he replies coolly)

STOP ADDRESSING EACH OTHER SO FORMALLY WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO ME

Wwx: why do you oppose me now? Who do you think you are? What does the lan clan think they are? That you believed i wouldn’t protest?

STAAAAHP

HE’S YOUR SOULMATE!! THAT’S WHAT HE IS!!!

HE LOVES YOU!!! HE WANTS YOU SAFE!!!

And here wen chao regains consciousness (oh yeah, wen zhuliu is def dead but wc was just knocked out until now…)

Oh shit wwx just kicked wc as he starts begging for his life

That was cold. I mean, wc definitely deserved it but wwx is not normally this cruel

WITHOUT EVEN LOOKING AT LWJ, WWX JUST KICKS HIM OUT

Wwx: this is a domestic affair of the jiang clan of yunmeng. Please leave it to us

Lwj looks at him for just a moment before lowering his gaze and walking out solemnly

WHYYYYYY

STOP BEING MEAN TO EACH OTHER

Oh god, and the expression on wwx’s face after lwj’s gone??

HE LOOKS SO TIRED AND DEFEATED

Like it was taking every ounce of effort to maintain that cold distance from lwj this whole time

And to make it MORE heartbreaking--

When the camera zooms in on wwx’s face as he watches lwj leave (again with that empty, defeated expression) we hear wc in the background begging “forgive me, forgive me”

!!!!!!!!

That begging superimposed over wwx’s expression??

IT’S ALMOST LIKE WEI YING HIMSELF IS ASKING LWJ TO FORGIVE HIM FOR WHAT HE’S DOING RIGHT NOW

Idk if the showrunners did that on purpose BUT OW, MY HEART, MY HEART, IT HURTS

And now I’M SOBBING

LWJ is at the gates of wherever it is they found wc, and he stops in his tracks when he hears wc scream

Then he’s just remembering the words wwx said to him

Lan wangji why are you at odds with me now

Who do you think you are

What do you lan clan think you are?

AND HE JUST LOOKS HEARTBROKEN

EVERYTHING HURTS SO MUCH

Then we cut to lotus pier and watch wwx and jc pay their respects to jfm and m-yu

Wwx: you asked me to take good care of jc and jyl, and i did. Rest in peace now.

*UGLY CRYING* JUST STAB ME IN THE HEART WITH A RUSTY KNIFE

IT WOULD HURT LESS

that’s all the wangxiantics for this episode so only one question remains:

WILL I EVER EXPERIENCE JOY AGAIN???

Return to Masterpost

#WangXiantics #wangxian #the untamed #cql

[dillydedalus]

october reading

i finished my masters thesis this month (yay!) so while i still read quite a lot for escapism i was also operating on no more than 2 braincells at any time, and one of those braincells was just. continuously screaming. so any incoherence or whatever here is. because of that.

i am sovereign, nicola barker a fantastically weird & enjoyable novella about a house-viewing gone wrong that eventually blows up the novella form. i don’t want to give away the meta aspect too much, even tho it’s not entirely unpredictable, but it is so very entertaining and delightful to read. had such a fun time with this. also has a great cover. 4/5

the lifted veil, george eliot i’ve only read middlemarch by eliot, so a 75-page novella about the supernatural sure was... different. it’s fine, but nothing special imo. i enjoyed the first chapter, which sets up latimer, a soft young man with the gift of foresight/telepathy and his fascination with his brother’s fiancee, whose mind remains opaque to him (....twilight???), but the second half is pretty meh. 2/5

the notebooks of malte laurids brigge, rainer maria rilke (read the german obvi) loved the beginning of this, where morbid, too-intense, death-obsessed author-insert malte laurids brigge walks around paris, seeing everyone carry their death with them, which then makes him think of the deaths he has witnessed in his childhood. the parts about his childhood in a danish noble family were also good, but it really lost me with the overtly poetic, weird historical/religious stuff?? feel like this might have been a victim of termin master’s thesis like maybe that’s not the time for poetic, fragmentary, modernist-ish novels. 3/5

wie der soldat das grammofon repariert, saša stanišić (read in german, english translation by anthea bell) i really enjoyed stanišić‘s memoir herkunft last year so i went back to his 2006 classic, about a kid called aleksandar growing up in yugoslavia and eventually fleeing to germany as a refugee during the war. it’s very similar to herkunft in story, although the presentation is very different. honestly overall i found it a bit Too Much, too long & too stylised in its structure. but like, i can see why it’s so popular. 2.5/5

i capture the castle, dodie smith i really liked this! cassandra mortmain is a very strong narrator, the atmosphere of the dilapidated castle and the dysfunctional family are great, & i was surprised by the crushing poverty of the family in the beginning - cassandra obviously attempts to cover this up both in her own head & in her journal, but for much of the first half or so i was genuinely really worried for the kids - and this makes rose so much more sympathetic in her resolution to escape poverty. i was less convinced by the whole love quadrangle this book got going on, but on the whole this was very charming, but often very melancholy in a far deeper way than i expected. 4/5 

the death of vivek oji, akwaeke emezi my second emezi this year, altho sadly neither of them have lived up to the glory of freshwater. this one is about (gender) identity, grief, trauma, love, and solidarity/community based on otherness, which are similar thematically to freshwater, but in a novel that is, i would say, both more stylistically conventional and more hopeful/uplifting (altho it is still very depressing in parts). i enjoyed this on the whole, but it just doesn’t grab you by the throat the way freshwater does, and the reveal/central mystery just feels a bit lacking. 3/5

gott wohnt im wedding, regina scheer listen, this book is probably more competent & historically interesting than literarily great BUT it’s literally (literally) set around the corner from where i live, i know pretty much every single place & business mentioned in it & the house troubles are extremely relatable, if a lot worse than what i am currently experiencing. anyway. this novel is centered around a house in berlin-wedding & the people who live in it & it's about the holocaust & the porajmos, current discrimination against sinti&roma, the history of the wedding, gentrification, familial trauma & all that. it’s very interesting historically, slow but still very readable, and like.... i just really love the wedding! it’s kinda shitty & depressing but i love it!!! 4/5 the only good indians, stephen graham jones note: the elk in this book is not what you, a european, think of as an elk. that’s a moose. anyway, this is a horror novel about four native american men who hunt for elk when, where and how they shouldn’t have and ten years later find themselves pursued by a vengeful elk spirit. i enjoyed this! the scenes where shit goes down were certainly very horrible & gruesome & very sad as well. 3.5/5

solutions & other problems, allie brosh this book really is out there & exists. anyway hyperbole & a half was like, one of my formative internet things and i still love it a lot. this book is second only to the winds of winter in eternally getting pushed back and back and back, so this even getting published was def a pleasant surprise. it’s still really funny, and the weird ugly drawings are still amazingly effective, but this one is. very sad. some really bad shit happened to brosh inbetween and it’s kinda a downer (i mean the first one had the depression saga but this one... is darker). 3.5/5

a supposedly fun thing i’ll never do again, david foster wallace .....i might have to stan dfw, just a little bit. like, i read infinite jest when i was way too young to appreciate it (still traumatised by the uh. creative use of brooms tho) & i have NO intentions of ever rereading it BUT this essay collection was so good that i may just have to read a lot of his other stuff. particular highlights are the title essay, about a cruise journey, and an essay about the illinois state fair, two things that feel particularly fascinating and offputting in equal measure in this year of plague, where even the idea of being in enclosed spaces with many people freaks you out. but i also really appreciated his essays on david lynch & television & fiction, even if i don’t agree with all of his takes. he just has such a good voice! funny, smart, precisely observed but always with a strange spin. 4/5, minus points for too much tennis, but oh well

gruppenbild mit dame, heinrich böll (group portrait with lady) marcel reich-ranicki criticised this book for being, essentially, a sloppy mess and that’s kind of accurate - it’s definitely too long & a bit draggy & böll (and the narrator/“author”) go on tangents and into details with indulgence & abandon, but it’s also... kind of brilliant? the way the “author” collects material and testimony on leni (the lady), her family, coming-of-age and the love affair with a soviet forced labourer that made her an outcast, constructing a documented history of her while leni herself remains ever elusive, the focus on structure, architecture, construction, the endless loops of self-justification (pelzer’s insistance that he is not inhuman, the real estate tycoon’s insistence that they just want what’s best for leni & that her resistance to profit-logic is abnormal)... there’s so much in here, and a lot of it doesn’t need to be there, but a lot of it does. 3.5/5 

sweet fruit, sour land, rebecca ley very lyrical, quiet, feminist climate dystopia. it’s good, well-written, very evocative of hunger and loss, a dystopia but really more about grief and identity, and i read it during the last few days of my master’s thesis and thus have absolutely nothing to say about it. 3.5/5

i also & this will be a shock, dnf’d burning down the haus: punk rock, revolution & the fall of the berlin wall, a book about the east-berlin/german punk subculture. it just felt like a longform essay artificially extended into a 400-page book & the writing was pretty basic in a music bro tries to be deep and like, subversive and shit kinda way. 

#the books i read #long post

[cherrymction]

kurt x kayla 💕

send me a ship and i’ll tell you... starring kayla and kurt, the dumb & dumber duo!!

where was their first date?: it’s no secret that both of them love drinking, and that’s why their first date was bar hunting - they went to every sigle trashy bar downtown dc. it was not fancy at all; it was rather simple but still very remarkable, just like that one bar they met for the first time. they both wanted the date to have their final touch, and there’s nothing more them in this world then going out for drinks in dirty bars, getting tipsy and then lost on their way back to her place just so they could make out on the couch while some random the weeknd song played softly, putting up the whole mood just for the two of them.

what my muse would do to cheer your’s up: kayla is really talkative, so she’d probably try to get him to talk it out whatever is making him feel dull. she knows how grumpy kurt can get when he has problems or just a lot up his head, so, if he is not up for talking it out, she’d just do whatever he wanted her to. kayla wouldn’t mind making it sexual in a way; actually, she really enjoys it when it’s just to get his mind off something - it’s during these times they try new things, so it’s always fun and surely does help getting him off his thoughts.

who wakes the other up with kisses (and where)?: i see both of them doing it pretty often to be honest, their whipped asses really be showing huh... when she does it though, she is really sentimental about it, like there is something about waking him from peaceful sleep with kisses kayla herself hasn’t figured out yet. she usually kisses his cheeks until he’s up enough to kiss her back when she kisses him down to his lips. also, she likes kissing his neck and chest when he sleeps shirtless or when they’re cuddling close.

who would pour water on the other to wake them up?: i don’t see them doing it often, but eventually... kayla, for sure. and kurt would be pissed about it. in the end it wouldn’t be such a big deal, but it would give her quite a head ache and she’d learn her lesson: never try to recreate that vine when your grumpy boyfriend is sleeping on a hangover.

how my muse would wake your’s up: with all the love she can possibly exhale. kayla finds his sleepy face the most beautiful one, like he puts it up without any effort. those puffy eyes and swollen face make her smile every single time they sleep together. being active during the mornings, it’s always her duty to wake him up, and she does it calmly and slowly, caressing his soft hair and whispering that it’s getting late with a soft tone. when he is down, she brings him a mug of coffee in bed, too.

who would start a food fight while baking or cooking?: i don’t see them doing it, at least not when they’re sober. when high or drunk though, they’d absolutely do it like they’re fighting for their lives, and kayla would start it like she doesn’t have anything to loose. it would be a complete mess, cooking high is never organized and the result is way worse.

who would suggest putting marijuana in the brownies?: “oh my god brittany...!” “you were thinking it!” “i know, but you said it!” intensifies. kurt would bring it up and kayla would give him total support and would help him to do it. she’d still watch it for him though, as weed doesn’t do good with his medicine and could give him a bad trip if overused.

who said i love you first and how (or when) did they say it?: we all know it’s her! kayla would say it first, but wouldn’t rush anything exactly because she knows he’s been put presure on in the past and would feel uncomfy if she did tell him straight ahead. that being said, she’d still tell him first, with a great timing and not making it bad for him in any way.

who would get into a physical altercation over the other?: they wouldn’t do it. never. fights are comon and they don’t see every little detail of life eye to eye, and that’s what relationships are about, but never ever would kayla hurt him in any way, and she knows he wouldn’t do it as well. they’d rather talk it out together than fight senselessly and doing something they’d regret straight across.

who insists on purchasing a pet together (and what kind of pet)?: they don’t have the time to have a pet, actually. kayla really wants a cat or a puppy, maybe, but she knows she wouldn’t be able to give it the attention needed - kurt agrees. i see them having a fish or a rat further on, but not at this moment of their lives.

who is louder (in and out of bed)?: i’d say kayla for both, but kurt is def as vocal as her in bed.

who takes more risks (in and out of bed)?: mister kurt donahue y’all! he is a natural risk taker, we must agree here. kayla isn’t far behind and takes part in every crazy idea he shares with her.

who would bring up the word ‘daddy’ first?: deadass? none of them, for god’s sake. kayla would definetely bring it up when joking about his ex, but in bed? never. she isn’t quite sure if she’d like it, and she is much more afraid to say it and figure out she actually likes it, so she prefers not to.

what is their shared, favourite kink?: i think kinks would take a little longer to show in their relationship because they’ve been really bonding and doing everything slowly. they’d do the standart vanilla for a while before getting into business, and it’d still be very slight at first, but that doesn’t mean they don’t enjoy themselves. they’re both into some light spanking and semi public and have been doing it for a while now. they’re still getting to know themselves in that matter, though.

describe their typical kiss: it is passionate, slow and has a lot of feelings in it. they enjoy kissing very much and often have long make out sessions while watching some random rom com movie. they like it slow, like they’ve got all the time in the world - and they really do.

how my muse shows their love for your’s: she’s pretty open about her feelings and catches every single opportunity to say - or show - she loves him indeed. she does it verbally quite regularly, and she likes it the most when they’re cuddling tight late at night , almost asleep. not verbally, she shows him in all little things. it’s all about how she reads every single mood of his, which is a quite hard task, and the way she stares at him with galaxies in her eyes. what gets her every time though is how he responds it right back in his own way.

their favourite ways to give affection: prolly making out. it’s not the kissing itself, but the soft touches that comes in the package alongside with the little confessions mid-kissing and the adrenaline rush. it’s her favorite.

who is more dominate?: once again, mister kurt donahue y’all!

who sings in the shower?: both of them do, but in total different settings. kayla sings those guilty pleasure bops everyone knows by heart every single morning when getting ready to uni, whereas kurt does it before doing to bed, when he sings to kurt music she doesn’t even know the name of the songs.

who washes the other’s hair in the shower?: it depends on their mood, i’d say. when kurt is having an episode, she is the most caring she can be, and that includes washing not only his hair but him as a whole, trying to get him to relax while in the bathtub. she’d also make sure he eats properly and gets sufficient amount of sleep. on the other hand, they shower together every once in a while and that’s when kurt washes her hair like he is a hairdresser. it’s funny and full of laughter, but she loves it.

who initiates shower sex despite being in a rush?: kayla... she is that brat... actually, the rush would just make it even more exciting to her. they’d probably be late for both work and college, but they wouldn’t mind it at all.

who teases the other under the table at dinner with the family?: i see both of them doing it tbh... in different scenarios, though. like the time kurt met her parents and she kept teasing him just because he had his nervous face on.

who has the weirder taste in music?: kurt. it isn’t weird at all tbh, but it’s kinda weird to her, as she grew up literally in beyoncé and britney spears only. even though she likes some of his “kurt music” as she calls it, she loves to tease him about the sad music he likes so much.

who would initiate dancing in the rain?: that’s her cue, miss kayla choi! she’d even sing to selena gomez while doing it.

who would be the one to suggest marriage?: i don’t see them getting married, at least not right now. they don’t want to rush nothing and they really see eye to eye on this one: marriage is not that important for them. as long as they keep growing together side by side, it’s valid. like the great anarchists they are, they wouldn’t do it just because the government want them to do so. they’re kurt and kayla and that’s fine by them.

what would they name their children?: hell, they don’t want kids at all, so no names! kayla isn’t the best dealing with little ones and kurt is a total disaster, so mommy and daddy isn’t a fit for them at this point. they’re also still very young of age, so it’s up to time. by now, she makes sure to take her meds properly and that’s it - pregnancy is off topic.

who would their children take after more?: ele é estéril !

#nancymcdonie #FICOU IMENSO #do nada... #𝐦𝐞𝐦𝐞𝐬 › answered #𝐜𝐡. kayla choi #𝐨𝐭𝐩. kayla & kurt › we don't have to rush when you're alone with me

[giobrossi]

meet giovanni “gio” rossi

✗✗✗ you see [ giovanni rossi ] around lately? yeah i heard that the [ cismale ] is/are up to no good. [ he ] has been here for [ thirty years ] now but they’re still pretty [ cruel ] which is fine because they’re also [ loyal ] so it balances out. the [ forty five ] year old [ owner of mayhem ] actually looks like a lot like [ milo ventimiglia ], don’t you think? it’s best to watch out, though, because it’s been said that they’re really into [ alcohol & violence ].

fun facts

nickname(s): gio

age: 45

favorite color: black

lightsaber color: purple def red

favorite fruit: tomato

vibe: blinding lights ~ the weeknd

details

life for gio wasn’t what most people call normal. to him it was. when you grow up with parents who are into guns and drug dealing you tend to forget what’s appropriate and what’s not. declan and eloise rossi didn’t hide their shady dealings from the four children. despite everything gio, nico, trix, and bella all had a tight childhood. they went to school like everyone else. had family game nights like everyone else. had a very large family that included drug dealing friends…unlike most people. the wholesome activities were laced with education on fighting, guns, and the rossi way to deal with problems. the family didn’t have arguments. they fought it out. their parents were loving but strict.

gio had it the hardest out of all of them. as the oldest, he was pushed to get into the family business. the rossis grew up alongside the o’rileys. they were basically and extension of their own family. at the age of seventeen declan had pushed gio into joining which he was hesitant to do at first. somehow the eldest rossi managed to stay strong within the o’rileys while going to the university. he proved himself time and time again as he climbed up the ranks of the o’riley gang.

at the age of nineteen gio started dating a classmate named sarai. she was captivating to him. everything to him at the time. by twenty they were engaged. everything was going great. the one hiccup was sarais ex-boyfriend who was obsessive. they had several verbal altercations. a year after their engagement sarai was murdered by her ex-boyfriend. that drove gio off the deep end. he acted in a fit of rage and hunted the man down, killing him with several shots to the chest. throughout that short span of time with the o’rileys gio had suffered injuries from fights. an assignment gone wrong had left gio in the med suite due to a gunshot wound in his shoulder. saoirse was there by gios side to help pick up the pieces.

one of the constants in his life with the o’rileys was saoirse. their friendship had a rocky start but when they finally clicked they stayed together. they were there for every major event in each others life. the engagements, the losses, the children that seemed to latch on saoirse like they saw her beautiful her soul was. gio saw it as well. after the incident with his ex he stepped back from everything but there was always a soft spot for sao. time went on and his feelings for saoirse grew stronger until he finally stepped up and asked her out. it was all uphill from there.

all of this gang activity left gio wanting more from life. that’s why he continued his studies in the field of sociology. he was determined to keep a semblance of normalcy. years were spent in college to get his masters degree and ultimately become the sociology professor he is now. for some odd reason, gio was obsessed with society. which made sense considering what he does for a living. 

saoirse disappeared leaving mayhem to gio. her unexplained disappearance left gio distraught and closed off from most.

gios personality can be described as stern, he has an issue with respect, warm around the people that are closest to him. he’s a huge star wars fan but he keeps it on the down-low. his relationship with his siblings varies depending on which one it is.

#gr: intro #indulgence.intro

[vecna]

Oohh for the fandom meme! Dragon Age?

Send me a fandom!

Oh boy, this is going to be spicy.

It’s also very Anders-negative, so apologies up front.

The character(s) I first fell in love with:

I’m actually not sure which was the FIRST, but it’s a tie between Morrigan and Alistair. I saw fanart of them going around at the time Origins first released, and that’s what got me to try the game! 

Alistair was a breath of fresh air, because at the time, I was used to warrior men in games being all Edgy and Rough, and he was the total opposite and a sweetheart.

And Morrigan was just instantly my goth wife, and had Claudia Black as a VA, so I was sold immediately.

Both still hold a special place for me!

The character(s) I never expected to love as much as I do now:

Loghain is the main one. He does a lot of truly reprehensible shit in the first game. But once I sat down and read the prequel novels about young Loghain, plus saw what he’s like if you recruit him, he grew on me A LOT and now he’s a top fave.

Nathaniel I expected to hate as soon as I saw his name + who his father was, but then the expansion came out and I ended up loving that dude almost immediately. I really wish he was around more after Awakening, and also really wish he’d been a romance option, especially for a Cousland haha.

Merrill is a weird one because she was totally uninteresting to me in DA:O, so when they announced her as a companion in DA2 I was like, “Ehhhh.” Then they punked me by making her adorable and sweet and now I love her.

Plus a bunch of side-characters like The Architect? I liked him a bunch in the novel + Awakening – although I found his Plan in the novel much more appealing. But as the years have gone by, I keep surprising myself at just HOW disappointed I am he’s never appeared again haha.

The character(s) everyone else loves that I don’t:

There’s a few, and all of them will get me yelled at, but here we go.

First: Isabela. This one’s a bit complicated, but it really just boils down to her attitude towards how you play your character. I actively dislike characters who are super sexual – regardless of gender. But Isabela in particular bothers me because she’s constantly pushing her lewdness and sexual humor on you, and when you try to discourage it, she admonishes you with, “Well, you’re no fun.” Her whole character is just… like that for me. Super pushy, overly lewd, gets uppity when you don’t have the same ~liberated~ opinions she does, and this is all played up in the writing like she’s this Empowered Woman the player absolutely must love, especially if they’re playing a male character lol. I hate her for the same reasons a lot of people hate Liara in Mass Effect, but with the addition of pushy lewd jokey characters always rubbing me the wrong way.

Second: Iron Bull. I’ve written a lot about why he makes me more uncomfortable than any fictional character I’ve ever encountered, and I just outright hate him, he makes my skin crawl. If you want details, feel free to DM me, I don’t really want to rant about it again publicly.

Third: Anders. Again, I’ve written a lot about him before, but. I hated him in Awakening, for a lot of the same reasons I hate Isabela in DA2. But the changes they made to him in DA2 are just kinda :/. While I absolutely agree with him about Mage Rights, the level of preachiness they added to him drove me nuts, and the fact that you’re painted as a Bad Guy if you don’t like him blowing up the chantry. And from a purely OOC standpoint: He’s become a figurehead for all the aggressive Discourse people in the fandom, and if I see someone list Anders in their sidebar bio, I know pre-emptively that their blog is going to be full of 6 page long essays of meta about how everything is Problematic, and no thanks.

To a lesser extent, I’m also not fond of Zevran. But in his case, it’s not anything major like the others, I’m just tired of Bioware’s habit of making the bisexual characters overly lewd sex-focused rogues/deviants.

The character(s) I love that everyone else hates:

Loghain, lol.

But also Sebastian Vael? There’s so much about him that I find genuinely fascinating, especially regarding his backstory, and his struggles between his feelings of responsibility to his family vs his dedication to the Chantry and bettering himself. He’s such a dear character to me, and such a pivotal part of any playthrough, I’m always blown away when I remember he’s a DLC character and many people don’t have him.

HOWEVER Anders being the fandom darling means that people tend to unfairly shit on Sebastian for reacting poorly to the Chantry explosion. People also like to label him as a poster child of a White Straight Church Boy, while refusing to acknowledge he’s… not straight, and not exactly a church boy either lol.

Also Vivienne, but I think that one’s really self-explanatory. I love her, and she gives a really needed perspective on the Circle, since most of the mage companions previously were apostates. But of course, she gets written off as a Chantry apologist, and an uppity bitch, when people would def love her for the same traits if she was not black lol.

The character(s) I used to love but don’t any longer:

Justice. And by extension, Anders. A lot of people like to rant about how Justice ruined Anders, but I always saw it the other way around.Justice was my favorite character in Awakening. The whole concept around him, that he was a Fade spirit who took human form and was experiencing life for the first time was SO fascinating. I felt like there was so much to explore there with his character.

Buuuut then they had him merge with Anders. With the narrative being that he WAS a spirit of Justice, but the moment he connected with Anders, it corrupted his entire spirit into something he wasn’t anymore. So essentially, the character I used to love no longer exists, thanks to Anders. And it reminds me of that phrase recently, about how the destination is so terrible you can no longer enjoy the journey? I can’t even appreciate Justice in Awakening anymore, knowing what happens to him.

To a lesser extent, Corypheus. He was SO COOL and the premise of him was AMAZING when he first appeared in the DA2 DLC, but then Inquisition had to go and turn him into a weird shallow mustache twirl villain.

The character(s) I would totally smooch:

None? Idk I don’t really have the Smooch Fictional Character gene.

The character(s) I’d want to be like:

MAEVARIS TILANI. May I one day finally have the confidence in my identity that she does, and also marry a sweet bear man who adores me.

The character(s) I’d slap:

Too many to list, really. Probably Anders.

The pairing(s) that I love:

THERE’S SO MANY. And most of them are with the PC, because I generally don’t ship NPCs together. But my top 3 are:

M!Hawke / Fenris is my ultimate OTP in the Dragon Age series, by a long-shot. Not even sure where to start on how much I love it, but two damaged guys leaning on each other to work through their respective loneliness and trauma is MY JAM. And lmao I love silver-sideburned Hawke chillin in retirement somewhere but being a supportive husband while Fenris goes off hunting the Bad Guys, it’s great.

Solas / Lavellan is a close second, with the caveat that I increasingly prefer it with a male Lavellan. Having the Inquisitor in love with Solas just changes the entire tone of the game for me, for the better, and him actually being the villain trying to end the world while in love with this normie elf is just (chef kiss). Too bad I’m burned out by how overly spammed it is.

Dorian / Inquisitor is in third, I will just always be fond of how it’s a story of the Inquisitor helping Dorian be happy with who he is, escape an abusive family, and realize that he’s allowed to be loved. Good shit good shit.

Some others:

Warden / Morrigan is probably my favorite Origins ship, and that only intensified with the way she talks about the Warden in Inquisition, esp if they’re Kieran’s other parent. What a cute goth family, regardless of the Warden’s gender, cause you can pry Bi Morrigan from my cold dead fingers.

Cassandra / Inquisitor might have a lot of Romance Cliches, but I adore it – although, similar others, I increasingly prefer it with a female Inquisitor. I actively dislike the weird no-homo rejection with her, and come on, a lady Inquisitor being her Knight In Shining Armor is just good storytelling.

Cullen / Inquisitor, for a lot of the same reasons as Cassandra. I love me a cliche romance, but I’m also fond of the narrative w/ him of someone he loves helping him heal through the lyrium withdrawals and take time to rest.

Josephine / F!Inquisitor is just adorable all around, and wholesome, and great.

Varric / Hawke COME ON HOW WAS THIS NOT AN OPTION.

On the rarepair end:

Sebastian / Hawke doesn’t seem like it would be a rarepair – you’d think everyone who loves Cullen/Inquisitor would love this one too. I do! But alas. That said, I’m also pretty aggro about this one with a male Hawke because SEBASTIAN IS CANON BI. WHY WAS HIS ROMANCE STRAIGHT.

Maric / Loghain is a rarepair I will take with me to my grave LOL. Never forget the scene where Maric thought Loghain was leaving, and bolted across the camp with almost no clothes on to beg Loghain to stay. Come on.

Nathaniel / Cousland is dear to me, and I love it so much more than Alistair / Cousland haha.

Greagoir / Wynne, I can’t believe this got validated in canon ahhhh.

The pairing(s) that I despise:

Again: THERE’S SO MANY.

Iron Bull / Dorian is my least fave by a longshot. Again, I have written about why I hate this pairing a great many times, but it’s awful and toxic and makes me deeply uncomfortable, and I could happily go the rest of my life without seeing anything about it ever again. Please keep poor Dorian away from that man. He deserves someone that doesn’t sexually harass him until he’s finally worn down into dubious consent (while drunk) and then outted to everyone about it.

Isabela / Fenris. Sorry, but it’s just bad writing that Fenris bails on Hawke because the physical intimacy triggered his PTSD and he needs space to process, but then will turn around and have a casual sex relationship with Isabela instead. Yikes.

Anders / Fenris. Aveline / Isabela. Alistair / Morrigan. All of the DA2 Hawke/companion rivalmances. I don’t enjoy “these two people hate and antagonize and want to kill each other… but they fuck” in any form.

Cullen / Amell. Yikes.

And basically ALL of the canon wlw pairings in this series suffer from the fact they have men writing them, and as a result they’re almost always some kind of abusive or racist, and skeeve me out. See: Celene / Briala, Leliana / Marjolaine, Branka / Hespith, etc. Please Bioware, I’m begging you to consult some actual queer women. It’s insane how badly they’re treated compared to how the canon mlm couples are written.

FINALLY, I recognize this will be the most unpopular of all, but. As much as I love M!Hawke/Fenris, I just honestly cannot stand seeing F!Hawke/Fenris. There are some pairings where I’m so attached to the m/m or f/f version, I cannot deal with the m/f version anymore, and that’s one of them. (The others are mainly non-Bioware.)

#LONG POST #REALLY LONG #SORRY #misc: text #misc: asks #misc: meme #series: dragon age #gen: bioware #utopianoverlord

[bigdickmadej]

bru, give me dom!Shane headcanons pls

Long ass headcanon list with background, shyan and even shara, and all that nobody actually asked for, i’M SO SORRY– under the cut:

Background

It all started when he was having a not strings attached relationship with a woman named Hannah back in college. She loved when he got dirty and possessive, and slowly asked for more until she was explaining to him about how she loved being a sub, and she thought he had potential for domming.

At first, he just wanted to try it out because it was fun to do shit with her, but he ended up liking it a lot.

Once she invited him to the bdsm club she often went to, he thought of trying other stuff to find out if he was comfortable as a dom or could switch, or prefered to be a sub himself. Since he only dommed her, he had the doubt if it was because he liked it or because she liked it.

Still, as they were together, he didn’t try anything else and didn’t went to the club alone ever.

Eventually, they went their separate ways but are always happy to see each other at the club when he goes. She also recommended him with people from another club at LA when Hannah heard he was moving after college.

They still see each other from time to time at club parties and so. She and her current husband are golden memebers of the club, and she always invites Shane to their parties even if he doesn’t go.

College

Shane never really had a sub aside from Hannah during that time, mostly because he was busy studying and finding out what he liked.

Breaking his relationship with Hannah allowed him to have a few first of his own, like the first time he dared to go alone to the club. He stuck by the bar and agreed to fuck with another girl after talking so much with her, he actually thought nothing would happen.

After that, he went more often when he felt like he needed his mind somewhere else.

He tried a lot of kinds of dynamics as a sub, but realized he wasn’t really into that. It hardly did something for him and he just kept disappointing the person he was with. His desire for pleasing and devoting his entire body to that person and their pleasure was not the kind that works better on a sub, it made him realize he was better suited to be a dom.

So, he tried a bunch of dynamics as a dom. He def doesn’t like master/slaves dynamics, and he is so not into age play but isn’t sure why he does likes calling his sub baby girl/boy, and can take being called daddy if fitting.

He had his first boyfriend during that time but didn’t dare to bring up the idea of having a dynamic at first, the way it went down when he did made him believe maybe he shouldn’t the next time.

When it happened, it also went not okay and so, Shane decided he would keep that to himself unless he dated someone in the community. Which he did, he had a boyfriend he met at the club in Illinois and it was all good.

It only lastet a few months, though, since he then moved to L.A. and both decided to break things off before someone could get hurt. They are friendly to each other, but Shane is not sure if he is even still in the community.

General

Shane always adopts his sub’s safeword, commands and colors. Most of these are pretty standard so he finds it better that way.

Man, he is bad with dropping. He always knows what to do and how to do it, what to say and how to say it when it comes to his sub having a drop. But him? He is bad at it.

For a start, he never accepts he has one. Not sure if it’s pride or embarrassment, or just self-hate in the sense that he believes he shouldn’t be having one in the first place. He is there to make his sub feel good, he shouldn’t need comfort.

Eventually, with the right partner, he learned otherwise.

Shane’s drops are bad. He gets angry and snaps easily, and he gets annoyed easily too. He can get hurtful without even noticing.

He likes to talk about the scenes in detail, but sure as hell enjoys when he is told to improvise. He is very good at that, which has bring him good experiences.

The kind of scenes he enjoys the most are the ones where he has his sub’s body completely at his mercy. He loves kissing and sucking on skin, marking the person as his, having the space and chance to do them as he wishes and knows they enjoy the most.

While he is pretty much bisexual, Shane knows he kinda has a bit of a preference for guys. Yet, his best experiences in bdsm have always been with girls– until Ryan, that’s it.

Coming to L.A. was such a change, he didn’t visit the club Hannah recommended him during the first months. When he finally did, it was because he was too stressed and needed to get out now.

He hooked up with the same guy in there as he fit in BuzzFeed and met the people that would soon become his friends, included Ryan.

Not many people know this but most things he knows aren’t from experience but reading. He doesn’t wish to practice all the shit he knows, but he believes it’s good to be informed in case it comes in hand.

He is a kinky ass, dynamics aside. He does know he loves dirty talking, he has a thing for smaller people with big personalities that he can wreck in the best of ways, he gets off other people’s fear (not necessary at him, but if he can work a scene with such, that’s fine), being called titles and shit, he loves to eat out people– ass and pussy, he is all for it.

King of dirty talk.

Sara

He never thought he would have that with her. Never.

It happened because one day she asked him what was it about him getting hotter when she reacted to his dirty talk. He got nervous and ended up spilling too many things, finally after a long silene, he explained himself.

She seemed okay with that and that was it! But he noticed how she would let herself react so much more vocal and enthusiastic to his little instanses of dominance and dirty talk, it turned him on so much more, he wondered if it was just him going crazy.

Because he always wanted to have this with someone he loved. Shane always wondered how that would feel like, to be in love with his sub, want to worship them and please them with all he is, having that trust with the person that makes his days with the wave of their hand.

And then one day, as she was playfully nagging him in the kitchen as he finished cleaning up the dishes, she straight up puted and asked, “when are you fucking me like I know you want? I’ve been trying to put you in the mood for a month!”, she kept ramblind about how she had read little brats are a Thing and she thought he would like that, and as she kept talking about it, she didn’t saw the way he took off his watch and rolled up the sleeves of his shirt before towering in front of her and just saying “turn around”.

Poor, poor kitchen.

Their dynamic was never too hard and since it was almost a year into their relationship, it was deeper than any other Shane had before. 

Sometimes, she knew more about one thing than Shane himself, Sara kept reading and watching videos, and whatnot about things that called her attention. 

She would take these ideas to Shane later and ask if they could try and thing or two.

Lotsa dirty talk and oversensitivity.

They did A LOT of roleplay.

In fact, her favorite scene was one that lasted a week while on vacations. In it, she was Shane’s stressed and thight boss, and he was the new guy trying his best to win her over. 

Her character kept dragging him around, being mean and bossy until he realized what she needed and was able to take control for her. 

It was Banging Town for two days as the great finale.

His was one she planned all on her own for his birthday. 

She did a treasure hunting around all their favorite places in the city while texting him dirty pics of herself, the praize was her in the cutest sexy kitten lingerie/costume waiting for him on a fancy room of a fancy hotel where she would be his personal pleasure doll for the rest of the night and part of the morning. 

Boy, that was good.

God, Shane felt like dying every time he had her body against his. She was so fucking small, he just ksjnfmdksmdmsdmf.

Once, he made her come just from dirty talking. He’s very proud about it.

He took Sara to a party at the club, but even though they didn’t have any problems around, she confessed to not be much into it, so they never went again. Shane didn’t visit the club while with her, only that one time.

They never had a drop, but after they parted ways, Shane had a very bad one that ended in him telling someone about his practices.

Ryan

That someone was one very surprised, frustrated, amused and pining Ryan B*rgar*.

Shane hates the way Ryan found out. 

When they first met, he had the biggest crush on him but knew nothing would come out of it. Ryan was with someone and many things were unspoken back then, hell– he wasn’t even sure they were going to be friends. 

Ryan means so much to him, he truly hates the way things went when it comes to this theme.

He mourned his lost relationship mostly alone, but he always had this ray of sunshine following him around and asking shit. It annoyed him at times, but slowly made him realize he couldn’t do this by himself, and that’s how it actually began.

Shane has known Ryan is also a kinky ass, maybe even more than him, for a while. 

He knows Ryan has a thing for dominant people, the first thing he thought of him was “this dude is getting pegged” and when he met Ryan’s ex, “oh, he IS getting pegged”. 

Never had the means to find out and he’s respectful enough to shut up when in time the man became his friend. But dude. He is all for this potential.

As he healed, Ryan’s curiosity had started to put ideas in his head. The man keeps asking stuff, and Shane knows he is making his own researches. 

When one day he tells Shane he Did Something during his weekend and his heart aches, Shane realizes his feelings have come back.

With a fucking vengance, since he can’t stop thinking about his friend and all the possibilities.

They get into a romantic relationship first, Shane is sure they are going fast but at the same time it feels right. It feels like this is mean to happen, it’s the natural thing for them, and he has never felt that with a partner before.

One day, Ryan accidentally sees Shane’s invitation for Hannah and husband’s party in Illinois. The invitation is very… odd. It was golden and it called Ryan’s attention right away. As Shane explains what it is, Ryan gets enough corage to tell him he would like to go.

It was a great experience for both, not to mention the months before the party were filled with fun explorations and more.

Shane felt like this helped them bond deeper, since Ryan seemed to like the experience and said he would like to visit the club Shane attends in L.A.

After that, Hannah makes sure to invite them every year.

They had so much fun chosing a safeword and code, Shane helping Ryan learn about colors, the kind of dynamics there are, his two little rules, planning their first attempt at a scene. 

It was something pretty standard and soft compared with other shit Shane has done, but man– it was them, this was Ryan, and it was perfect in his book.

He knows it probably wasn’t, Ryan is constantly saying he regrets having used his safe word in the first time, while Shane keeps calling him out about it, saying how it’s important that he uses it every time he needs it.

Still, it was so good– and many others followed.

Ryan is different from all the other people Shane has been with and has practiced this with. 

He is needy but strong, he is vocal and loves to be held, he loves being taken care of. 

At the same time, he knows and is sure of what he wants, after a while he learned to ask for it and will willingly do as said in order to get it. 

He loves being a good boy, and he will be bad when he needs it, and his consent is always so enthusiastic and happy, It overwhelmed Shane at first, but always in a good way. 

Shane is so enamored with him, it feels like this will be the best of his life.

It costed Ryan a little to let go of a few things. Like the way he sometimes would drop because he refused aftercare or how whiny he would get when Shane didn’t want to do so and so. 

Mostly, Shane refuses to hurt him and sometimes it drives Ryan crazy because, “I’m not made of glass, Shane”. Eventually, they would learn how to balance this and find a middle ground where both can enjoy things.

Ryan’s favorite scenes are the ones that involve sensory deprivation, especially of his sight. And the ones involving fear. His fear kink is so prominent, Shane wonders how the FUCK he didn’t realize before.

This, of course, gets them into very interesting territories and explorations at locations or at their hotel room after a fright night for Ryan.

They have a recurrent one in which Shane is an actual demon and it turns on Ryan so much, Shane is surprised to find out it turns him on like fucking hell.

He has gotten creative with this one, from just dialogues and some sort of backstory they did together, to make up and props, and costumes, and whatever is necessary to make the atmosphere in their room to be more demon-y-like.

They have the “Kinky Room”, as Shane calls it, on their apartment when they move in together. It’s just kinda the guest room, they just fill it with their toys and other stuff that helps with scenes when in The Mood.

Once in the mood, it’s almost impossible to get them out of it. Shane is better at putting a pause, and he always helps Ryan through it.

MAN, SUBSPACE. Shane is sure he has never seen something so beautiful as Ryan in subspace.

His aftercare when this happens is always the sweetest, Ryan can’t hide how much he loves it.

Shane always asks him to describe to him how he feels when he comes back from the high.

It often leans to them having some sleep and waking up to make love. Soft and slow, really loving.

The first time Shane had a drop while with Ryan, the man was so ready for it, it had a bad effect on him. It made him feel like if Ryan thought he was such a bad dom, he would have a drop sooner or later.

Once he calmed down and talked to Ryan, Shane apologized and tried his best to understand his sub also takes care of him, because this is a mutual thing.

He doesn’t drop often, can go actual years without one. But it’s a good thing he has such a prepared and sweet sub.

Ryan’s drop aren’t often either, but they were at the beginning. Shane is so good at taking care of him, it made Ryan realize he wanted to be with this man for the rest of his life.

Like the saps they are, they have a recurrent fantasy in which they are different people for their anniversary. Ryan is a dentist that just realized he is into men and doesn’t have many experience (lmao, college ‘come in me, bro’ frat Ryan has to laugh) and Shane is a lonely history professor with a kinky side.

They both know is the most vanilla shit in the world and YET, they love it so much, they are always excited about it as the day approaches.

It also always ends in them laughing in bed, an aftercare for the two of them that always has them in a good mood the next morning.

No matter how kinky they can get the night before, they always make sweet, sweet love in the morning the next day.

Punishments are such a thing with them because Ryan loves challenging Shane and sometimes he just wants to be treated hard. He loves the pain in a very different way from Shane.

There’s a lot of spanking to the point Ryan’s ass and thighs are bruised for days. The aftercare for these moments is always long and filled with a lot of love. 

But Shane’s punishment of choice is edging. In many, many ways. Pure torture as he has Ryan naked and tied to the bed or a chair, jerking him off to almost coming, then leaving without a single word. Blowing him, eating him out, fucking him, then leaving when he is almost there. 

Cock rings, plugs, bullet vibrators, vibrators with remote controlers– and Ryan loves all of it.

He would make Ryan walk with a vibrator up his ass for an entire week without letting him rub off one, he can’t come, can’t touch himself, and Shane is not touching him– but he is touching Shane. Of course, those are the most amazing Sundays ever. 

Sometimes Shane feels guilty, so Ryan always does his fucking best to remind him he wanted this and he is happy because of it, because Shane makes him happy.

Whipping is also a thing that happens, it drives Ryan crazy.

Lotsa marking and possessiveness during sex. Shane gets off so much on the idea that Ryan is his and he is Ryan’s, it’s a blessing Ryan feels the same way and is often begging to be his.

The way Ryan begs driver Shane crazy.

He would do anything for Ryan, so having him wanting to give hismelf like this, wanting Shane to have him, take care of him, love him whole and as he deserves? The Dream.

Shane is constantly calling Ryan sweet names. His favorites are baby, sweetheart and angel. 

Ryan is his “gorgeous angel”, and it sometimes play so good with their demon fantasy.

Once Ryan confesed he loved being called sweet names by Shane, he decided he would never stop.

Sometimes he would call him baby boy and prince.

When he calls Ryan ‘little guy’ or ‘little prince’, the man always reacts by moaning louder or melting against his chest, it’s amazing.

Ryan always refers to him as ‘sir’ and by his name during scenes. Sometimes he uses ‘Mr. Madej’ and when fitting, daddy.

The daddy kink thing was something that just happened.

When they talked about it, they ended up laughing so much, they realized it wasn’t really an issue.

None is into age play, though. Ryan just likes being called sweet things and taken care of, it just slips out of him.

When he is way too turned on, he switches from english to spanish, and spanish to english. So Shane is either called daddy or papi, and he loves both.

Doesn’t matter if they get old and rusty, being connected through this, loving each other like this, trusting each other like they do will always be an important and loving aspect of their relationship for both of them.

#madejsryan #buzzfeed unclean #shyan #shara #dom shane #skeptic believer #nini got mail #mine #my headcanons #dom/sub dynamics #sub ryan #sub sara #no polyam sorry #and also i'm so sorry this is so fucking long wow #and before someone asks. yeah i'm gonna fic this one day #headcanons

[vinylexams]

A very special fireside interview with XUXA SANTAMARIA

Check Insta for our thoughts on this landmark album from Oakland duo XUXA SANTAMARIA. Stay right where you are to read a really fun interview I scored with the band this week. They’ve just released Chancletas D’Oro on Ratskin Records out of Oakland and Michael blessed me with my very own copy. It was so good I knew I needed to tell you all about it and I wanted to pick their brains a little bit, too. Without further ado, please enjoy:

//INTERVIEW

You’re still breaking into indie world at large, but you’ve already got a huge following back in California and your home-base in Oakland. What has it been like to be featured in major outlets like The Fader?

SC: We are a funny project; we ebb and flow from being total hermits to having periods of relatively high visibility (relative to aforementioned hermit state). I wouldn’t say we have a huuuge following in CA but I do think that the ‘fandom’ we’ve developed here is really genuine because we don’t play shows out of an obligation to remain visible but instead do so because we feel super passionate about the work and the audience and I think people respond to that energy. I for one, and perhaps this is because of my background in performance, have a hard time performing the same stuff over and over without change which accounts for us being selective with our playing live. That’s also why videos are such an important part of what we’re about. The piece in The Fader was important to the launch of this album because it established some of the themes and, to an extent, the aesthetics of this album in a way that can be experienced outside of a live setting. None of this is to say we don’t like playing live, in fact we love it, we just like to make our sets pleasurable to ourselves and to our audience by constantly reworking it. We strike a weird balance for sure but we’ve made peace with it. If we ever ‘make it’ (lol) it’ll be on these terms.

Chancletas D'Oro is a pretty incredible record and while it reminds me of a few bands here or there, it’s got a really fresh and unique style that merges dance with all sorts of flavors. How would you describe your music to someone who is curious to listen?

MGK: Haha, we generally struggle to describe our music in a short, neat way (not because we make some kind of impossible-to-categorize music, but just because it’s the synthesis of a ton of different influences and it’s hard for US to perceive clearly). But with that caveat in mind - IDK, bilingual art-punk influenced dance/electronic music?

SC: Thank you for saying so, we’re pretty into it :) Like Matt says, we struggle to pin it down which I think is in part to what he says – our particular taste being all over the place, from Drexciya to The Kinks to Hector Lavoe- but I think this slipperiness has a relationship to our concept making and world building. As creative people we make and intake culture like sharks, always moving, never staying in one place too long. Maybe it’s because we’re both so severely ADHD (a boon in this instance tbh) that we don’t sit still in terms of what we consume and I think naturally that results in an output that is similarly traveling. Point is, the instance a set of words - ‘electronic’, ‘dance’, ‘punk’- feel right for the music is the same instance they are not sufficient. I propose something like: the sound of a rainforest on the edge of a city, breathy but bombastic, music made by machines to dance to, pleasurably, while also feeling some of the sensual pathos of late capitalism as seen from the bottom of the hill.

The internet tells me you’ve been making music as Xuxa Santamaria for a decade now. What has the evolution and development of your songwriting been like over those ten years?

MGK: Well, when we first started out as a band we were so new to making electronic music (Sofia’s background was in the art world and mine was in more guitar-based ‘indie rock’ I guess - lots of smoking weed and making 4 track tapes haha), so we legit forgot to put bass parts on like half the songs on our first album LOL. We’ve learned a lot since then! But in seriousness, we’ve definitely gotten better at bouncing ideas back and forth, at putting in a ton of different parts and then pulling stuff back, and the process is really dynamic and entertaining for both of us.

SC: This project started out somewhat unusually: I was in graduate school and beginning what would become a performance practice. I had hit a creative roadblock working with photography - the medium I was in school to develop- and after reading Frank Kogan’s Real Punks Don’t Wear Black felt this urge to make music as a document of experience following Kogan’s excellent essay on how punk and disco served as spatial receptacles for a wealth of experiences not present in the mainstream of the time. I extrapolated from this notion the idea that popular dance genres like Salsa, early Hip Hop, and Latin Freestyle among many others, had served a similar purpose for protagonists of a myriad Caribbean diasporas. These genres in turn served as sonic spaces to record, even if indirectly, the lived experiences of the coming and going from one’s native island to the mainland US wherein new colonial identities are placed upon you. From this I decided to create an alter ego (ChuCha Santamaria, where our band name originally stems from) to narrate a fantastical version of the history of Puerto Rico post 1492 via dance music. We had absolutely no idea what we were doing but I look back on that album (ChuCha Santamaria y Usted - on vinyl from Young Cubs Records) fondly. It’s rough and strange and we’ve come so far from that sound but it’s a key part of our trajectory. Though my songwriting has evolved to move beyond the subjective scope of this first album - I want to be more inclusive of other marginalized spaces- , it was key that we cut our teeth making it. We are proud to be in the grand tradition of making an album with limited resources and no experience :P

We’re a big community of vinyl enthusiasts and record collectors so first and foremost, thanks for making this available on vinyl. What does the vinyl medium mean to you as individuals and/or as a band?

MGK: I think for us, it’s the combination of the following: A. The experience of listening in a more considered way, a side at a time. B. Tons of real estate for graphics and design and details. C. The sound, duh!

SC: In addition to Matt’s list, I would just say that I approach making an album that will exist in record form as though we were honing a talisman. Its objecthood is very important. It contains a lot of possibility and energy meant to zap you the moment you see it/ hold it. I imagine the encounter with it as having a sequence: first, the graphics - given ample space unlike any other musical medium/substrate- begin to tell a story, vaguely at first. Then, the experience of the music being segmented into Side A and Side B dictate a use of time that is impervious to - at the risk of sounding like an oldie - our contemporary habit of hitting ‘shuffle’ or ‘skip’. Sequencing is thus super important to us (this album has very distinct dynamics at play between sides a/b ). We rarely work outside of a concept so while I take no issue with the current mode of music dissemination, that of prioritizing singles, it doesn’t really work for how we write music.

MGK: We definitely both remain in love with the ‘album as art object/cohesive work’ ideal, so I would say definitely - we care a lot about track sequencing, always think in terms of “Side A/Side B” (each one should be a distinct experience), and details like album art/inserts/LP labels etc matter a lot to us.

What records or albums were most important to you growing up? Which ones do you feel influenced your music the most?

SC: I know they’re canceled cus of that one guy but I listened to Ace of Base’s The Sign a lot as a kid and I think that sorta stuff has a way of sticking with you. I always point to the slippery role language plays in them being a Swedish band singing in English being consumed by a not-yet-English speaking Sofía in Puerto Rico in the mid 90s. Other influences from childhood include Garbage, Spice Girls, Brandy + Monica’s The Boy is Mine, Aaliyah, Gloria Trevi, Olga Tañon etc etc. In terms of who influences me now, that’s a moving target but I’d say for this album I thought a lot about the sound and style of Kate Bush, Technotronic, Black Box, Steely Dan, ‘Ray of Light’-era Madonna plus a million things I’m forgetting.

MGK: Idk, probably a mix of 70-80s art rock/punk/postpunk (Stooges, Roxy Music, John Cale, Eno, Kate Bush, Talking Heads, Wire, Buzzcocks, etc etc), disco/post-disco R&B and dance music (Prince, George Clinton, Chic, Kid Creole), 90s pop + R&B + hip hop (Missy & Timbaland, Outkast/Dungeon Family production-wise are obviously awe-inspiring, So So Def comps, Jock Jams comps, Garbage & Hole & Massive Attack & so on), and unloved pop trash of all eras and styles.

Do you have any “white whale” records that you’ve yet to find?

MGK: Ha - the truth is that we’re both much more of a “what weird shit that we’ve never heard of can we find in the bargain bin” type of record buyer than “I have a custom list of $50 plus records on my discogs account that I lust over”.

SC: Not really, I’m wary of collectorship. That sort of ownership might have an appeal in the hunt, once you have it do you really use it, enjoy it? Funnily, I have a massive collection of salsa records that has entries a lot of music nerds would cry over (though they’re far from good condition, the spines were destroyed by my Abuela’s cat, Misita lol, but some are first pressings in small runs). For me its value however, comes from its link to family, as documents from another time and as an amazing capsule of some of the best music out of the Caribbean. I’m glad I am their guardian (a lot of this stuff is hard to find elsewhere, even digitally) but I live with those records, they’re not hidden away in archival sleeves, in fact, I use some of that music in my other work. Other than that, the records I covet are either those of friends or copies of albums that hold significance but which are likely readily available, Kate Bush’s The Dreaming or Love’s Forever Changes, or The Byrds Sweetheart of The Rodeo as random examples

Finally, is there a piece of interesting band trivia you’ve never shared in another interview?

SC: haha, not really? Maybe that we just had a baby together?

//

Congrats on your new baby, and also for this wonderful new album. It was a pleasure chatting with you and I can’t wait to see what the future has in store for you and your music!

#xuxasantamaria #interview #oakland #music #electronic #electronicmusic #ratskin #ratskinrecords

[sillyfudgemonkeys]

My stance on P5 (cause apparently I need to explain myself :/)

So someone just told me someone was vagueing about me on the confessions blog (can’t say my name cause it’s against the rules but they’ll try to get as specific as they can 🙃 if you have issues just be a real anon hater and send to my inbox directly you coward). And I’m not going to do a reblog to that post, because I’m pretty sure that person must be on my blog. Because the post they were vagueing me about was......not tagged.....in the P5 tagged (I did not tag it as P5 nor Persona 5), it was just a post that was on my blog (now if it showed up in the tag or search I dunno why but I didn’t tag it for P5 for a gd reason cause I keep it to my blog). The post was me pointing out how P5 when they first enter Futaba’s dungeon they didn’t have shoes on, but after the cutscene they DID. The post was more comical (with me getting salty in the tags, but then you’d have to go out of your way to read my tags). And tbh, I’m half and half, yeah I know it’s a nitpick, and I’d just chalk it up to an animation error and let it go usually, but it’s P5 and that game is already inconsistent with it’s plot/world building/characters/anything important that I’m like “nah I’mma rag on it cause it’s just one more thing they screwed up” so I’m like half let it go and half rag on it (fun fact, when I saw they didn’t have shoes on I was gonna make a post saying “hey look this is cool, nice attention to detail” and then they messed it up literally 2 seconds later so dklsjf;afa yeah). (oh and btw, it wasn’t just “one” character, it was the whole PT cast at the time 8U” at least get it right 8U)

But the thing is......that was just a post on my blog, I’m not me berating the P5 tag. So that means you, person who vagued me, tend to go on my PERSONAL BLOG. So like....why are you on here? No, don’t ask me about me and P5, I will answer that, but you answer why are you bothering looking at my personal blog? Is it cause of certain content I post? Then just blacklist certain tags (like my “silly plays” tag cause nothing really interesting happens in that tag, or my more negative “persona problems” type tags), I know I need to be better at tagging my asks, but if you like my original content then just.....go to the OG content tags (aka videos/pictures/edits/coloring)? That way you avoid anything not made by me? Or if you don’t have a reason and you’re just here to be mad cause someone doesn’t like your game, then block me. You don’t seem to like me, so just....why are you here? You seem to want to ask why I’m here with P5, and I have my reasons, but if you don’t have a reason to be on my blog then why are you on it?

I’m not saying this to be mean, but I don’t want to be policed, esp if someone is going to be hypocritical about it. And it’s annoying to see vaguing (cause imo you are as bad as someone who sends anon hate, but you don’t have the balls to just send it to me directly XP)

Ok now where’s my stance on P5? I don’t like it, but it’s a part of a larger series and lore which I do LOVE! Which means, considering I’m a LORE WHORE, it doesn’t feel right to just skip a game esp if it could contain info about the MegaTen/Persona lore (or even Character lore) I want to know. In fact, I really hate it when I’m talking lore with someone and if expanded info is brought up from a side game they are like “Oh I didn’t play that game so it’s not canon” No Bethany, just because YOU didn’t play a game doesn’t mean it’s not canon. And no, no one is bullying you over the fact you didn’t play it, you just don’t like being wrong and the person was like “Ok well it IS canon and it’s in the game, you don’t have to play it but you.....can’t ignore this fact, also why are you arguing this part of the lore when it’s heavily established in said game you ignored???? I mean you do you but don’t get mad when someone corrects you. No one’s forcing you to do anything.” Ahhhhrrrrgggh so many convos I’ve seen happen, I’m not going to be on the end that I hate. DX<

Also, P5 is not the entire Persona fandom, so while I put up with it and indulge in it by association, it doesn’t have the ownership of the fandom (like with all the original games+ spinoffs+all remakes/ports and P5S/P5R included, but not mobile games, it’s only 23% of all of Persona in terms of game entries, and that’s overlapping with crossover games, and if we included other stuff P5 is def a minor aspect in terms of entries). It’s not that hard, I’m just a bigger all around Persona fan than I am a Persona 5 critic (I don’t want to say hater, because it feels like it sounds like I’m hating it just to hate it, when really it was a game I was excited for and loved and then it just burned me bad and I’m just dealing with the scorn). Always keep in mind, I loved P5 before I hated it, it’s probably why I’m as salty about it as I am, because I love P5′s potential and....I was just let down (it wasn’t unrealistic expectations, like I said earlier, P5 contradicts itself.....all over the place, it’s hard to ignore and it’s not something that was as big of an issue, or even an issue at all, in other games). 

Why do I still post P5 stuff when I don’t like P5 (by which I mean...posting about the OG manga raws, or wanting to do a partial game to anime dub or even would be willing to help with editing a fandub for the anime)? Because I remember being a newbie Persona/Megaten fan, getting into the series, and wanting to know more about it and it’s side materials but then not being able to have access it any of it (because it was still prettty niche when I first joined and I had no money at the time). I want to give people access to it! Sure it’s harder for me to now to devote time to it (than it was a few years ago), but I want to help with giving access to this Persona/Megaten stuff now that I have some ability! And it also means P5 as well gets some of that love. 8U

As for why I was replaying P5, so this is one thing that’s making me wonder if you are a regular on my blog or not because I’ve been talking about playing the Korean version (but in my one post I forgot to type “silly plays P5/Persona 5 KOREAN” so yeah I forgot to specify Korean at the end). So tbh....I’m actually ignoring P5′s writing while I play (cause I’m just going through the gameplay motions), cause I don’t know korean. 8U And I’m mostly using that tag as a means to point out different things in the korean ver (no that much, but yes Ryu’s shoes ARE censored 8U). But why? Well.....I talk about it here and there but anon/person....1) I’m a trophy whore, I love plat trophies and P5′s is super easy I can get it (and I’m not above playing bad games, oh yeah burn, I’ve played a lot of bad games for plats, and I’ve also played the same games multiple times for plats, I do this to myself but really I don’t mind replaying P5 4+ times for 4+ plats esp since I don’t really have to pay attention). 2) I’m a big MegaTen/Persona collector, I want all the plats I can have (I plan on platting the other versions of the all the dancing games on Vita and PS4, P4G, and the versions of Catherine I don’t have, like I legit have a gd excel sheet keeping track of the versions of Megaten games I don’t have yet....I’m just doing P5 cause it’s 1) one of the easiest to do and 2) it was easier to get my hands on them atm). I don’t talk about my trophy hunting on here that much tbh, but that’s.....really a big reason why I’m doing it (plus with the Korean/CHinese ver I don’t have to pay attention to any story so it’s all good! :D) Yeah I do it to myself, but I don’t really mind. 8U And I mean I tend to keep most of my P5 issue on my blog too. I think the only two posts that I put in the P5 tag were 1) a few consistency issues I wanted to meme about (aka the I’m about to head out post, which was actually the 2nd post I made on that topic but I decided to just meme that one, so I thought it was better than me just bitching, at least I tried to make it a bit funny yet informational 8U), and 2) something that I tbh had an issue since I back when I liked P5 (aka wishing they worked on speeding up the loading times and the fast forward feature), so since I was playing the game I was like “That reminds me, man I hope they fix this in the re-release!”. As for english P5, the only reason I’ll be playing P5 OG in english is for either archiving reasons or research reasons (probably both at once so I don’t have to play through it more than once again).

As for P5R, uhhhhh I’m excited for Kasumi (Jose is cool too, and the new dungeon has me interested too, and all the P2 demons coming back to it makes me wonder what else is/if anything is coming back), she’s my main draw. Yeah it’s connected to P5R, but she looks so much like Hamuko I JUST HAVE TO KNOW WHAT’S UP WITH HER! Hamuko’s my girl, and I need to know if Atlus is going to do something with that, or if I need to be pissed for them literally lifting Hamu’s face! Am I gonna get pissy about P5R’s new add-ons (aka, I’m aware that P5R is probably going to keep the issues from OG P5, so I’mma just judge P5R based on it’s new content)? Yeah, if they kept up the same writing P5 OG had. So yeah, I’m probably going to get pissy if they eff it up, but I’m not going in pissy, going in with really low expectations tbh, but I’m giving it a chance. But if they don’t eff up the new stuff then......that’s good! It means they did something right. So far Kasumi is not Marie so we’re off to a good start. I’m hoping the keep that momentum. 8U

So yeah, I think I have valid reasons for staying, maybe you don’t like it anon/person, but they are there. 

tldr; someone feels like the need to police me despite the fact they could just ignore me (even tho it seems like they specifically came to my blog to get mad, rather than me clogging up the tag, like I post there maybe once or twice every 2 months). My stance on P5 is that I deal with it cause it’s part of a bigger fandom I’m a part of and the fact I love the lore of that bigger fandom so it’s not like I can ignore it. I also have a Playstation trophy problem. 8U And I’m excited for Kasumi is that so bad???? (also I didn’t mention it, but Anne/Haru are enough to keep me around 8U)

#silly talks #i'm actually on my last 3 trophies for korean so after that i"m going to chinese #I don't mind the new teacher #not my main draw but I'll give him a shot #also mementos mission is a good manga to read #not canon and still perpetuates issues with mako's character #and the fact that those guys totally gave that one shadow a mental shutdown i'm not letting that go (esp since if they did that'd be so #INTERESTING please dont' let that go to waste mangaka ;w;) #but the mystery is really fun and I like it #i really need to post those raws tho #fdklsajf;lakjfl;a i just....oh man......it's a lot #it's easy to find me and look at my trophies #i have 151 plats yeah I have issues #getting plats is fun ok???? :w; #but yeah I'll try to get working on the P5 OG raws #i love anne and haru ok???? #sure I have issues with their writing but I just really like them still

[the-nysh]

Bkdk fic recs? Not any particular genre/setting; just stories that you fell in love with.

Ohoo!! *___* Yes, do I have a handful of them! Time to go through mypersonal notes and share what I’ve saved!

First up are some of my fav prolificauthors (and their well-known, must-read fics), whose attention to detail, emotionaldepth, and characterizations I trust and therefore I would read anything they write of the pair:

 @atomicblonde/lalazee (Blood Moon), for writingsome of the most riveting emotional roller coasters, whose power with words anddialogue can both raze mountains and completely swoon you asunder with theirintensity. All her fics are worth reading (and there are plenty!) But I thinkthe one that particularly touched me most was Ugly Beautiful. :’)

@driftingglass (Before Midnight), forwriting some of the most immersive stories coiled with gripping and buildingtension, both plot wise and relationship wise. Also has one of the mostdescriptive and intense voices. And for writing a Deku with thedetermined/defiant agency he deserves.    

@soulestring/soulstring(Falling, I feel you), for some ofthe most emotionally raw & vulnerable scenes of feelings realization I’veseen. Through all the extensive denial, fear, reluctance, and passion towardslove. Chronic emotional constipation at its crippling worst and most beautifullyrewarding. Oho, I’ve reread these many times for just how strongly they stuckwith me. (Also features Kiri as a valuable mvp, oh thank goodness

@osakakitty (Make Every Moment Last,Like the Moon), mmm,for a finesse with sweeping/honest tenderness with enough resonance to make oneweep. I know many readers who have fallen victim to it. Not from sadness, butfrom just how thoroughly touching and profound her stories are. :’) What ablessing, indeed.  

@kanaevr/Kanae_vR(The Space Between), forwriting with an awareness and careful handling of both the characters and plotthat I could best describe as sincere.The detailed realism and slice of life aspects are both relatable and fun, which contribute towards a whole,well-rounded package that is thoroughly engaging to read.  

Next, aside from the many works available from the authors above, are some fav individual fics that I’mparticularly fond of:

In the Eye of the Storm by @cheshirebutton,THE iconic naga au. If there’s one fic in the fandom I’d consider my fav, I think it’d be this one. Which I’ve read 5+ times, and would definitely reread again. 8D Ilove it that much. Everything is handled with so much impressive quality and care;almost anything introduced has a purpose that will become relevant again later(which is why rereading is so fun). From the impeccable world building to thecharacterizations, the absolute stakes and peril involved that drives them towardsbelievable, life-altering decisions (the weightthey must consider between duty and personal feelings)…from the wedges thatkept them stubbornly apart, towards a curious magnetism and blooming/meaningfulsolidarity that brings them closer together even stronger. :’)) This is classicenemies to reluctant allies to lovers done beautifully, and has me convinced oftheir mutual feelings 1000%. Omg, they feel somuch. ;A; Whenever there’s a ch update I have to immediately dropeverything because it’s just thatgood, ahhh.

Hunting the Past by Justaperson1718, theassassin and blackmailed!bodyguard au! 8D Which happens to be my fav actionfic. It’s so smart and fast-paced, from all the convoluted planning and tensesteps involved to set things right, damn! We have these expertly specializedpros, extremely capable in their respective fields…but who are also fumblingdorks unaccustomed to sorting out their feelings and properly communicating(esp after all the conditioning/exp they’ve been through). It’s so fun to watch them executemissions and then transition to the domestic (yet still very muchliving on edge) down time with them learning to bond while taking care ofKouta. Unexpected surrogate action parents due to dire circumstances, aha!  

The Mummy by Spectra, my favadventure fic. A retelling of the classic movie, but done so well and with style. Probably some of the most genuine fun I’vehad reading fics in this fandom, ahaha what a riot. XD From the crazyshenanigans they get caught up in to the wholesome heh copious amount ofbonding from their time together. Truly, all scenes are extremely well paced andallotted for the type of ‘meat’ readers are in for. Kacchan is so comically (andseriously) overprotective of Deku, omg I love it. (Considering the endlesstypes of human & undead enemies after them, ahh!) Bonus, Kiri is such a goodaccompanying bro, what a delight.

Some Read It For The Articlesby low_commotion,for some of the nerdiest awkward dork bonding, from their shared seriousinterest in hero mags, to their more hands-on practical applications in the gymtogether (ayyy!! ;D)…all while everyone else in the class assumes it’s over‘something else’ and blows it out of proportion (oho~ but things ARE slowlyhappening!) It’s such a hilarious and witty slow burn scenario where they helpeach other improve, but I think what really shines are the faithfulcharacterizations. Deku has such a distinct rambling headspace, and while thepov is limited, the respectable merits inherent to Kacchan’s character stillshine…like ahh, that’s it; that’s why he’s a fav. A very fun and unique ficindeed!  

Just Like The Comics by brichibi,oh man!! The angst and feels truly got me in this ‘what-if’ scenario where Dekunever earned ofa, never went to U.A., and slowly became so jaded/bitter athaving to settle for something other than his dream, his growing envywitnessing Kacchan achieve his burned too much to bear. It’s such a fascinating and segmented Deku characterstudy where he has to discover what he really wants in life, with plenty ofmeta jabs at canon that had me going whoa!!! :O Plus Kacchan is as patient andaccommodating to Deku’s pace as he can be. :’) (Which…became another point ofcontention for Deku, to not hold him back from becoming the best…yet I love the counter, ‘I don’thave everything; I don’t have you.’ fuufjgkgh!!! ;A;)

And now even MORE fics that I like/enjoy, which have caught my attention, orthat I’m currently eagerly waiting for more updates:

warm hands and shipwreck on the red sea byflowercafeAHHHHH!!! Warm hands features my most fav headcanon: heated quirk musclemassages. (Omg it’s so tender/intimate; I’m so weak ;A;) While shipwreck featuresshark mer!Kacchan! 8D I love the realistic attention to detail/descriptions andpenchant for marine biology, ohh it has such an immersive Life of Pi feel. (Pluswelcome room for spice, oho.) Actually, all this author’s works are great withtheir extremely strong starts, definitely keeping watch!

under a hollow sun by umbrage, probablymy personal choice for the classic fantasy au most faithfully adapted (YESSfinally one that matches what I’d been searching for 8’D with a fun supportiveKiri too! *grovels at author’s feet*) Many classmates are incorporated in a fun way too! (Authoralso wrote another fic featuring funny accidental quirk misfire during certain…activitiesand dang, I wish more authors would make use of that too, ahaha! XD)  

springtime of youth by claimedbydaryl,I’m extremely fond of the last chapter, for how realistic and awkwardly naturalthe approach is, definitely left a lasting impression.  

Incandescent Snow by Chicory, acarefully crafted au and scenario that is gorgeous and tentative, with well-madeoc’s who contribute their unique pov’s of the boys’ growing relationship.  

Collision by stardustacademia(cosmiclarents), one of the most thorough and in-depth looks into Kacchan’spsyche and angst I’ve seen, but it’s unfortunately been deleted. :’(( Noting itanyway for remembrance’s sake.

Ambivalent by bakuboi ohdang this was such a unique approach to Kacchan’s pov and source of his anger I’veseen, and impressive writing insight for being anime-only too.

A Haze of Crystal by semiautomatichearts,ooh I really enjoyed the emotional depth in this one; the author has anotherhanahaki story I’m keeping an eye on as well.

how he should’ve known (andhow it turned out) by vannral, theirapproach to the classic fake dating trope caught my attention, but all theirworks are fun and worth checking out too! :D Def keeping an eye on their stuff.

The Devil Blues by iknewamantheir police detective au is so fun and well done; oho those sparks fly! They’vewritten more stuff with unique/interesting approaches I’ve enjoyed too.

Map of Scars by Celestialgunfireopera,ohh :’)) a very touching and vulnerable moment, through particular intimacy andacknowledgment of past actions previously left unsaid. That type of meaningful tendernessand skinship really hits the spot.  

By Design by EtherealBeing(also author of Bluebird), this one is such a unique idea/premise I have not seenbefore! :O Extremely fascinated to see where it’s going.

Izuku’s Home for Wayward Petsby glamour_weeb,wolfdog-hybrid rescue and rehab au, omg it’s so charming and wholesome. :’3  

Shadows and Gold by Sonday, thedesert prince/servant au, whoa!!  

Fireflies for the Moon byBestTankTopist (Keyade), the historical samurai au! Definitely got my eyes onit for more.  

Lunch on Tuesdays by @rironomind,and of course, I have to rec my buddy for her casual, slice of life take ofthese disaster dumbasses that is both fun and surprisingly bold (for tackling that topic in a way no one else has)with authentic Japanese flair (only rom could think of the meaningful gesture ofDeku sitting in seiza, like wow why have I not seen anyone else incorporatesuch behavior before, dang). Thanks so much, rom.

And there we go! Hopefully that’s a big enough handful of fics toappreciate, as I’ve read plenty more where these came from. :’D There are somany talented writers and amazing fics in the fandom worth all the support!  

#Anonymous #replies #bnha #bkdk #fic recs #long post #nowadays i pretty much only read bkdk fics and check what's updated every day ahaha #(i've probably forgotten/left out a bunch uwah) #i've seen creator appreciation on twitter recently so ayyy might as well contribute some of mine as well! 8D #only know a few of the accounts here to notify ahhh :') #hmm i notice most of these are multichapters...welp i'm here for that emotional slow burn anyway