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#it's been a while since I read it so I'm rereading it to
avonne-writes · 2 days
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YOU ARE A GENIUS. I’ve been reading the new chapters of Reverie as you update it, but it’s been a while since I’ve read the first few chapters. So I’m going back to reread from the beginning right now and am losing my mind over the parallels.
First of all, I forgot that the literal opening scene was Buck burning their dreamscape 😭 but we had NO idea what was coming.
Then, we’ve gone from “She'd always like his jokes and would never cry, because Bucky hated the sound of sniffling” to —> Buck sniffling being the best sound Bucky’s ever heard because it means he’s alive and breathing.
I’m sure I’m gonna find so many more of these tidbits as I continue my reread, so I’m very excited!! <3
Thank you so much, dear! ❤️ I'm glad you're rereading the beginning and finding all these connections with the later chapters. It made me really happy that you found them!
You can also see that I already talked about the possibility of the connection being shut down in the first chapter. Another parallel between chapter 1 and chapter 7 is their first time dreamwalking and their first time since Gale was shot down:
Chapter 1:
Bucky woke up immediately. Sitting up in his bed, he shivered as cold sweat dried on his neck. He tried to calm his erratic breathing while his mind was racing with the realization - he had dreamwalked. He did it! He had given up on it so long before that he couldn't believe that it finally happened. He had pushed into his soulmate's dream and found him. He had a soulmate! A spark of joy burst in his chest. He barked a laugh, felt it spread in his heart like honey. But a moment later, the feeling gave way to sudden, overwhelming disappointment.
Chapter 7:
Bucky wakes up with a gasp.
Around him, the night is gloomy and cold, but in his chest, a spark of joy bursts. He barks a laugh, feels it spread in his heart like honey. His soulmate isn’t dead. He’s okay, he’s alive, and he dreamwalked again. He tore that barrier down and came to Bucky. It’s like their first night, but no disappointment follows - only pure joy.
And Gale even references their very first time dreamwalking.
Chapter 1:
The boy stood up and gave him a once-over. He hummed. “I could take you in a fight.” That made Bucky laugh out loud. “Sure, buddy.” Something in his demeanor seemed to have put his soulmate more at ease. He smiled. “Are you gonna stick around this time?”
Chapter 7:
Tear tracks draw clean lines in the dirt on his face. Down from his red-rimmed eyes to the too-sharp, thin lines of his jaw, and his lip trembles. His blue eyes look like water when they meet Bucky's. “Are you gonna stick around this time?” He tries to joke, and Bucky huffs a wet laugh as he rushes to him and crashes into the circle of his waiting arms.
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Lackadaisy Enrichment
#in our enclosures!!#video linked as source; which i'm glad to see already has a million views and is trending. That's Right#lackadaisy#WHICH i have been reading since at least '07 when i was thirteen my god b/c this animation is based on the ongoing webcomic#like does its influence show up Directly in some Discrete way i can point to in my art? not very easily probably. And Yet.#the inspiration....i wasn't able to be Regularly Only for at least another year / art done Nonprofessionally Online was novel to me#like wow ppl can make & post fanart of w/e they love huh....didn't know webcomics were a thing & i never really read that many since but.#good god the quality of Lackadaisy at its onset is like this is superb?? this person putting in all their talent and effort???#and Then you get years & years more art and i don't even know what superlatives to throw out abt its quality as it evolves. obsessed w/it..#if i see a new lackadaisy comic page i Will be acting out. obviously this animation is a delight & also stunning. and fascinating to also#juxtapose as a Translation / Interpretation of the comic in a different medium & standalone snippet of Story#and that we're not even quite there in the comic timeline; Taking Notes abt character info we get distilledly here....genuinely love like#take it back to '07 i'm like oh boy can't wait for the dream team to assemble. then a decade later when it did? Oh Boy. that is payoff lol#namely hooray for stitches and mudbug at the field office for every passing gangster. killing one marigold associate but not the other#which seems like a promising start to shootouts w/the other dream team triumvirate. i adore that in canon so far mordecai freckle & rocky#have met but only over a nice brunch. re: all intentions anyways. anyways i'm like Gifs Must Be Made while i'm also so riled afresh abt the#comic that i've been sooo hype for for over fifteen yrs now babeyyy Deservedly. i've done a couple of rereads & ought to do another....#For Interest it'd probably take a few sittings to catch up from the start but there is much to be engaged over....this ongoing story that's#historical fiction prohibition bootlegging cats with plenty of focus on characters & several Mysteries. which i'm better at parsing now lol#like one of the more recent rereads like Oh Of Course x (probably) accidentally killed his y & z took the fall & that's a binding secret...#Not [oh of course] abt the circumstances surrounding a's death & how b & c were involved. nor the ''what's marigold's damage'' mystery#which is great. love to not know things. love that we can readily follow all the emergent drama everyone's wading in nowadays. hell yeah#anyways admire my organized approach to gifs here. four shots each Expressions Atmosphere Action Groupshots#sure might've muddled through gifmaking for this anyways but fr being a huge lackadaisy comic enjoyer for now most of my life helps#and its very Overall Inspiration like. just really getting the [you can really just draw stuff out here] going. fr the art's detail & skill#and that enrichment like i'm gonna have a great time following this. And I Have#you don't expect a crowdfunded indie animation in the mix back then but hell yeah fellas#SIGH ok removing a 4th gif that's broken / not displayed despite reuploading then entirely remaking it. if it's a bug i'll try again later
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viperwhispered · 1 month
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Rest
Guess what? I've got more Jamil x reader for y'all. You can also find this on ao3. No warnings, just 866 words of kinda fluffy(?) caretaking stuff with gender-neutral reader.
At this point, you know Jamil’s schedule almost as well as he does. So, when you have the chance, you head to Scarabia’s kitchen, hoping to spend some time with Jamil while he and the other students prepare dinner. 
However, when you enter, it takes you but a moment to notice Jamil’s uncharacteristic fumbling and the tired look in his eyes. The way Jamil’s chopping the vegetables has you worried about him cutting himself with that knife he’s usually so adept with, and it seems it’s only force of habit that’s keeping him on track.
You frown, and when your eyes meet Jamil’s, you can already see him put his guard up.
So he knows what state he is in, huh? And still, here he is.
It seems Jamil is reading your thoughts, all of him telling you drop it before any words are even said.
At least he still lets you lean in and give a quick kiss to his cheek in greeting.
“Hello love. Do you still have a lot on your agenda for today?” you ask, keeping your tone low for at least some semblance of privacy in the busy kitchen.
“Nothing I can’t handle,” is the response you get.
Of course.
It takes a little more pestering before Jamil actually answers your question. Your lips purse. That list is far too long to your liking.
You take a moment to think, juggling your own plans and to-do list against the urgency of the things Jamil mentioned.
“Will Kalim be eating from that?” you ask, pointing at the food Jamil is preparing.
“Yes.”
“Alright, I won’t be touching that one, then. I’ve gotta do a few things but I’ll be back when you’re done here.”
“Don’t,” Jamil says with a glare, clearly aware of what you’re thinking.
Yet even his disapproving look doesn’t have the usual weight behind it.
“Yes. I will,” you say firmly, even as your heart curls inwards with another bout of concern.
Really, when did he get so tired?
And how did you not notice it earlier?
You leave the kitchen before Jamil can protest further, hurrying through the dorm corridors to find Kalim.
Soon you have an enthusiastic – and concerned – supporter for your plans. You have Kalim point out a few reliable Scarabia students to help with a few of the most urgent matters Jamil mentioned – cleaning up the common areas, delivering some paperwork to Crowley, preparing some dorm-wide notices – while you see to Kalim getting his school supplies in order for the following day. You even recruit a couple of third years to help Kalim with his homework.
You’ll see to the rest tomorrow – after all, you do also have a boyfriend to look after.
Your conversation over dinner can hardly be called anything else than an argument – despite Kalim’s best attempts at acting as a moderating force between you two. It is very tempting to ask Kalim to tell Jamil to take the rest of the day off – it’s not like Jamil would be willing to openly disobey a direct order. Still, you really don’t need to remind Jamil of his position on top of everything else that you’re already doing more or less against his wishes.
Eventually, however, Jamil’s had a square meal, the most urgent things on his to-do list are being taken care of, and you’ve managed to drag him to his bed.
“I really wish you wouldn’t push yourself so hard,” you murmur, your arms wrapped tightly around Jamil. You’re telling yourself you really do just want to cuddle, to offer some respite to Jamil. Still, there might also be a part of you worried that if you were to let go, he’d just jump up and get back to working himself to the bone.
Yet, for all his protestations, just the fact that you’ve gotten Jamil to lay down with you speaks volumes of his current exhaustion.
“I can’t just leave my duties, albi. You know this.”
“Making yourself too indispensable, is what you’re doing,” you protest.
Oh, you know it’s not so simple. Not with his background, not with all the expectations and assumptions.
But sometimes you really wish it would be.
Jamil merely scoffs in response to your words.
Still, it is undeniable that he is slowly beginning to relax in your arms, slowly bringing his head closer to yours. His eyes are starting to flutter, too.
“I will still need to help Kalim with his homework, at the very least.”
You wonder who he is trying to convince more, you or himself.
“Amin and Khalil are helping him. They’re basically top of their classes, aren’t they? I’m sure they’ve got it.”
Still, Jamil frowns.
You sigh. He really is not letting go, is he?
“Do you want me to go supervise?” you ask.
And leave you, unsaid yet hanging there right after your words.
“Don’t,” Jamil eventually says, the word barely more than a breath.
It seems he has accepted his fate.
You softly caress Jamil’s hair, listening to his softening breathing.
And when you wake up, wholly unaware of having been lulled to sleep in the first place, it’s to the lightest of touches from Jamil’s fingers.
Tagging @diodellet @twstgo @crystallizsch @jamilvapologist @jamilsimpno69 as per request If you'd like to be tagged for any future works, let me know!
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lunarharp · 11 months
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into the deep end - 30k T orufrey fic, focusing on memory trauma, disability, and romance.
the sweet oblivion of the victim, the poisoned freedom of the other.
for one moment - it had felt like two parts returned - the needed reunion of two disparate halves. no more secrets, no more pain.
the moment you get to give back what you never wanted to take. that moment, under the night-blooming flowers, when they had both let out the same single broken sigh of relief.
but they were never whole to begin with, were they?
qifrey swore he wouldn't say 'sorry' to this man any more if he could help it - sorry is cheap now. he didn't want to be in a position ever again where you only have 'sorry' left. so he just looks down into the threads of his blanket, strains his eye until it hurts, feeling his insides - his throat, heart and head - burn with pain. he expects more, but olly says nothing.
olly says nothing.
#witch hat tag#orufrey#sorry i wanted to make a new post for my fic since the first illustration is new.#*stands in the middle of a desolate field in the pouring rain* Please Read My Tale...Blease..Oh god please..*collapses to the ground*#someone asked if there's spoilers in it. Um...yes. Sorry...it's about everything#maybe i should describe it more? it's about qifrey becoming more and more disabled - as i feel is his canon trajectory#and both of them processing the choices that have been made. it was necessary for me to explore this in order to fully understand orufrey#and for them to have the cathartic conclusion-that's why this is important to me for my witch hat fanwork making life. this connects it all#and having dived into qifrey's mind and lived through oru's feelings i was able to get to a place that is possible for them.#the hit/kudos ratio is so pathetic idek what happened. ppl opening it realising its long and saving it for later or just bailing lmfao#idek any more i hate advertising my writing i hate trying to get more ppl to read my long fics it's so hard 🥲#i'm so much prouder of this than my art...i was able to sink deeply into the orufrey feelings i had always wanted to fully explore#so. it's there lol.........i reread the date/kiss segment today after trying to forget about it thinking maybe the fic is just BAD lol#and like.....nope! i like it very much and this is what i was trying to get across. and it's always there to be read by anyone who wants to#and i will always remember the bliss i felt while writing when i was just lost in their world and living as them. dear GOD i love them.#i'm grateful to myself that i put in the work and love to make this so that i can always come back to it. i wanna illustrate scenes properly#but i'm never satisfied with drawing things i've written because i just can't capture the vivid experience in my mind. maybe one day.
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vargaslovinghours · 7 months
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The unusual but no less hard-hitting 10½! (1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9)
So as it turns out, I did so many Blank Slate/Have you lost your mind? doodles that I ComPletely broke the last sketchdump lol, so it gets it’s own! Who could’ve figured that making basically a full comic of Chapters 2 and 3 would’ve made just a few too many sketches lol
Because of that, I’d strongly recommend reading what I've posted of Have you lost your mind? so far before this! Spoilers and author’s notes/behind the scenes warnings and all that haha
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Concept sketch for Scriabin - I always love having visual signifiers to denote timeline/AU/etc. differences so you can tell at a glance where you are :) His silhouette gets to be correct! The details, well, sorry we forgot those ♪
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And concepts for Edgar! I've drawn him in different glasses before so it was a bit of an excuse, using these new/old glasses to do so again haha
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But in the end I went for a reference! Remember when I drew Edgar's glasses tiny?
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And I mean, if he hadn't worn them in a while, maybe they're just a bit small on him! Lol
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Poor memory-less Edgar's musings, it's not just sad to be forgotten, it's sad to forget :(
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Early concept of Scriabin freaking out by himself in the bedroom. I'm glad I got to keep it :D
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Always gotta draw 'em reacting to something just out of frame
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Poor Scriabin, he wants to be close despite knowing Edgar doesn't remember him. He has to face this whole Being Human thing completely alone! Edgar just doesn't understand!
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He doesn't know how good he's got it haha, if I was really mean I'd have let him keep his glasses instead. There's a bunch of fun themes either way, but stealing from Edgar while hiding in his own hair is as good as any hehe <3
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Blank-faced Edgar, I ended up with a lot of these, unsurprisingly. Doesn't help that he's cute haha
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As usual, starting from the middle - it's just easier to get ideas flowing around a core! Also that note pointing at Edgar of "Put Todd to bed" was all the everything of the prep work I did for writing that little section, but the rest Absolutely Needed storyboarding lol
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He might come to resent you if you manhandle so much right after meeting for the "first" time
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Scriabin actually touches him in the original draft, but after I thought about it, it'd probably take a bit to cross the touch barrier comfortably again! Scriabin's still weird about Edgar but Edgar is wary, it's an interesting dynamic
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I won't show off every panel, but panels like these where I think they turned out especially cute Have to be included haha <3 I dunno what it is but Scriabin pouting always turns out adorable ♥
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Floof harder! Edgar's innocent expressions ahh <3
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Starting to lay the groundwork, but still a bit nervously! It is quite fun how they skirt each other, not quite sure what the other knows - how many lies can Scriabin get away with before he gets caught!
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Scriabin using some informed guesswork in conjunction with what he definitely knows, he is rather intelligent :) You can also see Edgar's unfocused eyes well in this one, I tried to draw them fuzzy behind those glasses hehe
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These are all lined up like this on the page :D Really happy with his hand expressions here, and his face haha
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This was one of my favourite lines - he keeps making excuses for Nny! Edgar no! - I fully admit that it's also partially influenced by how cute Edgar turned out haha, the poor thing - but he's so wonderfully fluffy!
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I love this line as well, Scriabin utterly convinced that all his hard work must have gotten through to Edgar somewhere in there, he said it often enough, he must have listened to him at least once-!
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And then Edgar completely cuts him off and redirects him haha, they’re both hopeless <3
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So mad at himself and Edgar, comedy = pain + time, but this is still fresh! Give yourself some time!
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That last line in particular is so insidious because he did that, Scriabin was the one who put him in that situation, and now he’s trying to turn it back around on him! He's the worst ♪
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Guilty Edgar <3 Still pressing on (changing the subject so he doesn't have to linger on the feeling hehe), he does have his own questions
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These kinds of exchanges were especially fun to look back on from their individual perspectives since I only drew it once, starting with Edgar. How honest can Scriabin really be? He can't explain everything and not be kicked out for being a potential danger to Todd or Edgar! He's gotta play his cards Just So
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Edgar is also quite intelligent! Catching Scriabin out in a lie, even when he's trying so hard to skirt the truth!
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Scriabin so mad about being called out, gotta rub it in just a little bit that he's Totally Right lol, what a brat <3
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Scriabin is legally and morally and emotionally and spiritually obligated to mess with Edgar sexually in literally every iteration of his existence, it is a core tenant of his being and also he really really wants to (lol) ♪ Drawing Edgar all blushed up is just a bonus, who does this stranger think he is! What has he forgotten! He's not some easy man! Haha, if you only (still) knew, Edgar
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Whatever he was going to say would just hurt Scriabin's feelings, better to just cut him off before another reminder gets laid out
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Probably my least favourite dialogue that I had to change was making "?" into something that flowed better in just-text, it's not the same! Lots of little notes about word choice actually haha. Love them reaching for each other even like this <3
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Edgar has all these feelings to contend with! My favourite shot is easily the last one, Scriabin's relaxed mouth while Edgar's heart is beating out of his veins right into his ear ♥
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Pls o////ò;
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Existence is exhausting
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Even without knowing him, he's just a cautious guy :) And he wants to be gentle with him! He doesn't realize what he's doing, what his actions would mean to Scriabin if he could see them, and he does them all the same 💕
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Pretty lad <3
Technically backtracking, to Ch. 3! POV shifts are fun lol
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Zarla mentioned Scriabin curling up into a ball in the blankets and I thought it was a cute visual haha ♪ Haven't had a use for it yet but never say never hehe
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I wanted to go for some high perspective shots to drive home the uncanny feeling of being really truly alone for the first time ever. That, and he's dramatic anyhow haha
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His posing was very important to me! Since Edgar knocks on the door while he's still leaned against it, the contact points would Feel a specific way
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Scriabin got a lot of「bracket notes」for his section, usually as digs lol, where does Scriabin get off saying that Edgar has no tact haha
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More blank-faced Edgar! These were actually drawn separately - could be chalked up to how each of them remember the event! Edgar sees himself as more put-together and Scriabin as more foolish haha ♪
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That horrible sinking feeling
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I pick on him a lot but this really would be incredibly scary and sad! He's alone, expelled, and the only person who Knows him now doesn't even recognize him! This was probably the one scene I wanted to be just a bit longer, really feel the weight, hmm
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But he's also quite resilient haha, he has to be <3 He has enough tenacity, thank goodness haha
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One of those examples of panels basically repeating lol, I can only fit so much text per pose! Plus it's fun to see the little body language differences :)
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Another bracket note lol, Scriabin has to be the best at everything!
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And another, have I mentioned that Kaggie is my favourite of the two? ✨ I'd still like to give both K and D a more sizeable reference sometime! Scriabin continues to be the cutest when he pouts, agh <3
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Touchy touchy touch ♥
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I do love the phrase "feeling himself" right after the last panel lol - it can be both literal and metaphorical! And that's what you get for not cleaning up after yourself! I swear that lightswitch panel confused me so many times on reviewing notes lol
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He's not even careful pfft. Then again if he was, he wouldn't have a mess to grumble about in the first place!
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A familiar face while Scriabin's already feeling small on his lonesome, ~it's symbolic~
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Ough, it hurts to think that Edgar might actually be able to watch Zeitgeist, not knowing the deeper implications. The thought of him inviting Scriabin to see it! 💔
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The most important question, and he hasn't come to a conclusion yet :) I wonder what his answer will be once he stops hiding from it!
Hhhh this has been a really fun AU to write for, I'm glad that I finally put it to words since it had been rolling around in my head since early 2021 - there are so many fun and insidious things to explore! Especially on Scriabin's side, though I still think it's the most fun to be stuck behind Edgar's eyes, an aware audience knowing what Scriabin is up to while Edgar doesn't hehe ♪ Hopefully I'll have some time to return to it after a bit! :D
#💟#Doodles#Art#Sketchdump#Blank Slate AU#Scriabin#Edgar#Hhhhhhhwhy did I make so many of these lol ♪#I finally utilized the method I'd heard about for fic writing of doodling out scenes for visualization#And then it comes back on me like this! Lol#And this still isn't even all of them!#Cough Patreon plug cough cough cough lol#But most of them are featured here :) I was happy with a lot of them! :D#In general as a fic it's been quite easy-going haha#It feels a little ironic to me but it's my in-between fic - since I'm not rereading it's detail-light/non-specific#I guess I'm just thinking of it as a first draft until I reread haha ♪ I'm just sharing it while I'm here! :)#I think it'd be a fun read-along to find which panels go to which scenes hehe#Although I'm also a big advocate for ''seeing'' fics on your own first!#Sometimes the imagery is different and inspires! I've had several times where I'll read and then draw#And /then/ go look at the accompanying art and it's quite different! Translation through medium! :D#So I always recommend getting your thoughts out first haha you can always return later :)#I know I said so already but having at-a-glance differences to show where we're at ah <3#And that it's to do with both of their glasses! How they see each other but literally! Hehe!#It really is such a fun concept to play in ♪ Similar in some ways to And Also With You#But one-sided! I also really love the trope of ''The one who should know Doesn't''#Oh and did you catch the Loved and Wanted reference? It's subtle haha#Always pulling little things from everywhere >:3c Blink and you miss it fun!#Pls do stick with me if you like it so far :D I have more ideas just you wait ♫
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sysig · 2 months
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Lost my mind thinking about the Vyer Estate (Patreon)
#Doodles#SCII#Helix#Max Vyer#Dexter Favin#So while I'm not usually one to draw backgrounds I am actually Really into architecture and a little into decor and room design haha#Do I know much more than the basics? Nope! But I'm still fascinated by it :)#Some of these rooms have a very strong image in my head and some are fuzzier - it's been a bit since I reread#And I also haven't read with the layout in mind I don't think so there's that as well haha#I'll also freely admit to being very influenced by The Sims 2's build limitations when working these lol - spacing and density of items#Trying to map all these pieces of scenes into a continuous singular building is difficult! There are windows that butt up into other rooms!#It's a fun exercise tho :3#Update: I have now reread with the layout in mind lol#My mental ears pricked every time there was a mention of furniture or layout lol#Like Max's couch! And a carpet in the foyer >:3c#And Dex's room also being upstairs :0 To think I almost made my first floorplan a single-story!#Silly me#I'm pretty sure this is the first time I've doodled Max's mom also :0 From memory - again - oops lol#I have always imagined that final scene with her as having this large-room/small in the frame kind of energy to it#All natural lighting and kind of dim and hazy - coming down from the high vibes#Actually pinning down a back wall is a whole other thing lol - sometimes the stairs are right there and sometimes they're in an alcove#It's always those tricky windows! And then actually populating a mansion with rooms that are useful lol#Dexter mentions that Max could've asked the cook but Max says he's asleep - how many people live on-site I wonder!#I'm also deeply enamoured with Max padding around in the middle of the night - a house he grew up in and feels safe wandering around in <3#In his element ♥ Comfortable ♪♫
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bossladytae · 1 month
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~
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It is 70°f (21.1°c) out right now and I'm trying to take advantage of the lovely weather before the temperatures drop out to 30°f (-1.1°c) tonight ;;;-;;; (that's gonna cause so much pain x_x)
But while it's still sunny and warm, I've opened up windows to air out the house and I've been sitting in my hammock outside and reading which has been quite lovely
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highwaydiamonds · 1 year
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As someone who hates the sisyphean task of cleaning, how dare my mental health prefer a clean room.
#like come on brain - you could have made this one easier on the rest of me but ( as usual) NO You didn't#did i think about this as i sit in my tidy bedroom where everything just looks a lot cheerier and cozy and happy now that it's clean? yes#did it literally take me DAYS to get it this clean - and by this clean i still have laundry and stuff to do - so it's not perfect#but it looks like it p much is#and while my skin has not been cleared no my depression cured - it certainly is a boost to feel like this is a refuge#i actually want to spend time in her and feel like it's a nice room to be in - awaaaaaaaay from the other people i live with#and lbr - i need a plce to get awaaaaaaaay from them (and ok fine vice versa most likely)#but still - it would be a lot simpler if my brain liked a messy room more- my lazy parts would prefer that- but no#depression brain says -BITCH CLEAN UP - you will be happier and capable of doing some of the things if it's clean#also - you will feel LESS OF THE BAD HORRORS if it is clean#so UGH - FINE i will have to work to keep it clean - I GUESS.#i should reread camus's myth of sisyphus because iirc he didn't talk about dishes or laundry or room cleaning in that#he probably talked about death - been too many years since i read it - i don't remember - probs death and suicide#but not cleaning - he should have talked about cleaning. or wanting to die when you realized living means more cleaning#that would have been way relatable - but anyway - here we are- i'm not dead - and not planning on being so any time soon hopefully#partly because there is shit i still wanna do - but also partly because this room looks p decent and i'm not gonna make it messy#especially not by dying in here when it takes forever to get it clean#moral of the story: cleaning makes you feel like you wanna die but when it's done for the moment you'll be like i'll do that another day#because now the room is clean and dying in there would be a waste of the efforts of cleaning. just appreciate the space - vibe w/ it#and then you realize - ok life is maybe okay - and there's art and books and flowers and sex and chocolate and cute animals#so even if there are sisyphean tasks - and there are many - well do em anyway - brain will like it and then get back to the good stuff#thus endeth the tag saga after a short text post#welcome to how shit is around here sometimes
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gailynovelry · 1 year
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Ember Warrior is now 58,500 words long!
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krispycreamsicle · 2 years
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@ wen qing anon, is this a make me choose or?
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goonlalagoon · 2 years
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A house, a home || Young Wizards
I saw the ask response around the current canon ages of the YW kids while in the midst of camp NaNo, and wrote 1,800 words of spontaneous domestic fluff
Also on AO3
Nita flopped down onto the couch, letting out a sigh of relief. She enjoyed her job - mostly - but she still treasured her weekends, and Friday evening had finally come. Kit dropped down next to her, handing over a glass of water and only just avoiding spilling his own. She waved a hand in vague gratitude, knowing he’d understand it to mean thanks! Great to be home and good to see you, hi! without her saying a word, whether verbally or mentally. After over a decade of being each other’s closest friend and wizardry partner, they could have whole implied conversations through a few gestures or the twitch of an eyebrow.
 After a few minutes, she twisted to curl up against him, head on his shoulder. He pressed a quick kiss to the top of her hair.
“Long day?”
“Yeah. Good! We got the agreement through, but it’s such a - ugh. You know.” Kit nodded, though she couldn’t see it. Even without listening to her talk about the ins and outs of environmental policy campaigning, he had a pretty good background understanding of his own. It was hard not to, as a wizard who could speak to the trees and understand what they said about the changing seasons and patterns, had friends who happened to be whales or dolphins (and sometimes wizards) who were as sensitive to the changes to the ocean as it was possible to be, or flip open your manual and see detailed readings of any atmospheric variation or pattern you cared to look at for as long as it had been possible to get measurements - in some cases longer, though those were less reliable. Some days Nita found the work invigorating, a way of following her Oath of wizardry in her day to day life. Other days it was just depressing.
 Kit nudged her gently in the ribs.
“Okay, let me up. I’m gonna make mama’s chicken for dinner - it’s already marinading, we finished up a bit early ‘cause we had a super early call.” Nita let herself slump sideways into his vacated seat.
“See, this is why you’re the best.” He laughed, patted her ankle on the way by, and headed back into the kitchen. Nita wriggled until she was on her back, feet propped on the arm of the couch and staring up at the ceiling. She wrinkled her nose at the cracks in the paintwork. They’d fixed anything structural, mostly through subtle wizardry, though one or two things they’d had to get someone in to help with just to make it not too obvious that there was something odd going on.
 They hadn’t gotten through much of the decorating yet, still getting used to the idea that they could decorate the place however they wanted. Splotches of paint samples dotted the walls, though Ronan had laughed his head off when they told him and then reminded them that you could buy pretty much anything you wanted at the Crossings. Including time in a nifty device that threw incredibly detailed holograms up, accounting for objects in 3D space, so that you could make a lifelike mock up of any room you chose and walk around it, seeing how different colours worked and what furniture you wanted to use. It wasn’t cheap, but Nita still had a lot of credit worked up with the staff of the Crossings from various dramatic exploits, and a solid in with the stationmaster. Also a very healthy alien bank account that was built largely on investments and returns from Carmela and Ronan’s ongoing side business of ethical chocolate exports. Writing them a custom wizardry for filtering through the business practices of every step of their pipeline to help quantify as much as possible the ethics of each partner had earned her several shares, and they were paying dividends.
 It was largely how she and Kit had been able to afford the apartment.
Nita had been torn on the option. On the one hand, being able to play around in a SIMs style mock up was appealing. On the other, there was something nostalgic about putting up swatches, trying to imagine how the room would look. Eventually they’d decided it would be fun, and spent a day up at the Crossings getting increasingly distracted by different options - particularly after taking off the filter to limit them to what could be reasonably implemented on Earth, and could goof around with anything that the Crossings system could find labeled for sale anywhere related to ‘interior design’. Even if most of it had been for fun rather than useful, it had helped narrow down their colours and had given them ideas for things they might not have dreamed up otherwise, and for a few pieces of alien technology that they could pass off as slightly weird decorating choices or furniture, or even that just wouldn’t be visible.
 (Alien temperature regulating systems, for example, ranged massively as you would expect, but there were several very discreet options that you could get that blended in perfectly to the join between wall and ceiling. While they could use Wizardry to achieve the same effect - and regularly did if they went anywhere out of atmosphere - it was also the kind of frivolous use of Power that they tried to avoid, particularly when there was a perfectly reasonable solution available.)
 - Kit, do we have any plans this weekend? - There was a thoughtful hum from the kitchen, just about audible under the clatter of pans.
- Uh, think we’re seeing your dad for dinner on Sunday. There wasn’t anything urgent on my Manual when I looked earlier, not sure if anyone’s clamoring for more of your time more urgently - His mental tone was teasing, and Nita snickered. There was always someone asking for time from one or both of them; they’d taken on deputy-Advisory responsibilities for the region some years ago and taken on increasing responsibility since then. They’d talked it over a few times, and Kit thought he was likely to phase out of the pipeline for full Advisory soon. He liked working with other Wizards, but he dealt better going in depth with one or two as a mentor or support on a specific project, rather than trying to keep on top of what was going on with several people. In his own words, this is why I don’t want to be a manager at work, Neets. Better play to my strengths, yeah? Nothing concrete had been said, but Nita suspected that once they were more settled into their new home there would be more official movement coming through to back it up; the Powers and their on-planet network tried where they could to not pile new responsibilities on when you were dealing with something major outside of Wizardry, whether positive or negative.
 Nita pulled her manual out of her otherspace pocket, skimming through messages.
- Nah, unless something comes up think it should be fine for my usual hours, a few consults and a request to look at a spell calculation, but no fires to put out -
- Nice! Why d’you ask? -
- Figure maybe we should actually take the plunge and do some of the decorating. If we hate it, we can always change it, right? -
- I was gonna say, actually, Chel and I were chatting, and he said - Kit broke off mid thought, the oven beeping. Nita tucked her manual away and rolled to her feet with a groan, going to set the table. Once they were sat down, plates piled high, Kit continued -
“Like I was saying, Cheleb was really interested in what we were doing, and told me that they do a kind of paint in one of the - ugh, I can’t remember where - anyway, someone, somewhere, does a kind of paint that changes colour really easily. Like, you don’t need Wizardry, just ask it nicely in the Speech with a passcode, and it can change to loads of different colours. Chameleon particles, it translated at, but not sure if that’s literal or a cultural translation.” Nita grinned, raising her glass in salute.
“That sounds perfect. Painting party this weekend?” Kit clinked his glass against hers solemnly.
“Sounds like a plan.”
They clattered into Nita’s old family home on Sunday evening, shaking rain off of their umbrella before propping it in the bucket left by the door. Her father called a greeting from the kitchen, echoed by Dairine, Roshaun and Filif. Nita lit up, sticking her head into the kitchen.
“Filif! I didn’t know you were gonna be here, how’s my favourite Christmas tree!” He waved back, and the house filled with chatter about what everyone had been up to.
“Nita and I are officially adults now,” Kit declared when it was their turn, helping carry plates over to the table. Dairine snickered, and her dad raised an eyebrow as he sat down.
“And you weren’t for the past decade? Well, almost decade for Kit, give or take a few weeks.” Nita giggled.
“We’ve discovered we have strong opinions about curtains.” Kit nodded solemnly, trying and failing not to grin. “Seriously, we spent forty-seven minutes discussing options and I don’t think I’ve ever felt so much like I’m an actual grown up.” Dairine spluttered with laughter.
“So, you didn’t feel like an adult when we did that errantry right after your birthday - you know the one,” she grimaced and there was a collective shudder. It hadn’t been terrible work, not the most stressful situation they’d worked on by a long shot, but it had been a spectacularly uncomfortable location. “Or when you both finished college -“
“- or, Nita, when new wizards started popping up in your manual first, rather than in your senior advisory’s to triage support -“ Roshaun added with a smirk, Dairine nudging him in the ribs with false irritation for interrupting.
“Or when the pair of you got jobs, or bought a flat together.” Harry added with a grin. Filif rustled his leaves, obviously cataloging this list of markers of human adult life. Nita and Kit both shook their heads, grinning.
“Nope. Turns out you’re actually an adult when you spend your spare time thinking about colour swatches, curtains, and whether it really matters if all the place-mats match or not.” Harry chuckled.
“Ah yes, true responsibility - the first time you understand why your parents were always so adamant that you be careful of the paintwork and not eat on the couch. Even if you do have the benefit of that little mini alien roomba…thing. Thanks for that, by the way, it does making keeping everything clean so much easier, even if I do have to remember to hide it whenever the neighbours pop by so I don’t cause an extremely international incident.”
 Nita grinned, nudging Kit’s ankle under the table. He nudged her back, smiling, and hooked his ankle around hers companionably.
- I still think the green will look best -
- Ugh, I don’t know! I like it, but I’m worried it will be too dark -
- Well, maybe whichever planet it was that does chameleon paint also does a chameleon curtain… -
- The perks of being a Wizard, huh? -
- Carmela will be so proud of us. Let’s not tell her and see if she notices anything -
- Agreed -
“Hey, Dair, pass the potatoes? Filif, how’s that spell circle you were working on going, I haven’t had a chance to take a look at progress…”
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greppelheks · 2 months
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Rereading the first book of my favorite series
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I have no idea what I'm going to do for NaNoWriMo this year. I feel very uninspired lately.
I just want to do well in my class and my energy has been low lately (season change on my new medicine, I'm guessing???). I need some energy because it's Shakespeare and I need to keep my grades up to stay in the honors society (no pressure lol).
Much More in the tags as per usual... :P
#also it's grad school so C's are effectively F's which is fun#I got into the honor's society this term but wow I don't know how I managed that (truly)#I switched medications half way through grad school so I feel like a different person wrote that Anne Bronte paper even though it was me!!!#sorry but Shakespeare is not my favorite but he's better than other stuff I've read lately#I'm more of a Romantics/Victorian reader but I like the history aspect of the middle ages and renaissance so I can probs get INTO it#I read A Little Life right before class started and yikes yikes yikes- it's the worst thing I've read in a while :(#I try to read some popular literature as well as the classics#I try to understand why certain books are popular but sometimes it misses me entirely#maybe my taste is really bad but that book could have been better if Jude's suffering wasn't so drawn out (800+ pages...)#it became too much for me tbh#the best book (play) I've read in a while is Richard III#again probably my bad taste but so far Richard III is the top Shakespeare play#I am reading 8 of his plays for my class so we'll see how they all compare- if anyone is interested in that?#King Lear was not as good imo and I have to rewatch/reread Henry V before I can offically give my opinion of that one#my paper is going to be on Richard and Henry so you will probably get shit posts about them and their plays#you're welcome I guess?#maybe I'll post some pictures of the new (used) books I bought off my beloved thriftbooks? It's been a while since I've done that#I feel like I haven't posted any updates in a while so here they are#hope everyone is doing at least okay if not great- it's a weird season#irl updates#grad school#mychatter
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astarlightmonbebe · 1 year
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done with aib s2 btw. hit up my messages and inbox if you want to dissect it together.
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personasintro · 7 months
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Mutual Help | #01
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↳ 𝐬𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬; in order for you to pretend to be his girlfriend, he helps you with your sexual desires ⏤ he calls it mutual help
⇢ 𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: jungkook x reader
⇢ 𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞: fake dating au, fluff, angst, smut, slow burn
⇢ 𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: explicit language
⇢ 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 3.4k+
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𝐚/𝐧: this bombass comeback wouldn't be as amazing and special if it weren't for @kithtaehyung who made the best new mh banner anyone could ever make!!! ryen, thank you bub so much for putting up with my indecisive ass and taking the time to make not only this banner but different versions before that! I truly appreciate it and I'm thankful you're a part of this!!
ogs know this one is reposted but I hope everyone will enjoy it whether they're rereading it or reading for the first time! lastly, thank you for the endless love and support, i love y'all ♡
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𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐱 | 𝐧𝐞𝐱𝐭 ⇢ 
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The hallway looks exactly the same, which there isn't any reason why it should look different all of a sudden, but considering you haven't been in this building for the past few weeks just makes you want to notice the slightest change. But there is none. It still smells sterile with a little bit of sweetness which reminds you of cinnamon. You're not sure why, nor do you really dwell on it too much.
You could imagine your Thursday evening differently, which means laying down as soon as you come home and turn on Netflix, trying to spend at least twenty minutes finding a good show. That's been your routine for weeks now, but you're not complaining. It feels that void of loneliness in your smart one bedroom apartment.
Although, you can't help but feel nervous when you picture the message you got from Jimin.
'come to Jungkook's, he needs us' 
He never explained anything further, nor replied to the tons of your messages or missed calls. You wouldn't be on the edge, if you've seen or heard from Jungkook. Apart from some occasional messages like 'what's up' or 'what were you doing today?', your communication went downhill. But you don't blame him or yourself for it. You were both busy and probably still are, to even hangout like you always used to.
It bothered you for some time, not hanging out with your best friend like you used to. But you've grown used to that small but painful fact that you don't have to see each other every day. Plus, after some time you've realized, you can still be best friends with someone without having to chat with them 24/7. Gratefulness is how you'd describe your feelings. Grateful that your friendship works, even though you don't get to spend your time with each other that often.
Your knuckles meet the wood of Jungkook's front door in a gentle manner, which is a complete opposite of your inside feelings as you've this weird feeling inside of you. The message Jimin sent you was weird and you haven't heard from anyone since then.
And when the door finally opens, you're glad you're met with Jimin himself as he stares at you with hopeful eyes and a breath of relief that escapes his plush lips. You rush inside, already taking off your shoes and jacket while you confusingly stare at your friend that looks more than relieved to see you.
"What the hell happened? You never texted me back." you tell him, or more like scold him rather than properly greet him.
"Ah, sorry," he cringes, pulling out his phone before he notices the bunch of messages and missed calls from you. "It's just—"
"This is bullshit."
The grumpy and raspy voice unintentionally cuts him off, booming inside of the apartment causing your ears to naturally perk up. Is it just you or his voice got deeper? You look at Jimin with a questioning gaze, who sees the confusion on your features as you hear Jungkook's grumpy and annoyed voice. Rather than explaining something to you, he sighs and with a quick cock of his head towards the living room, you both walk inside.
You're surprised when you see Taehyung there as well, opening a beer can before he pushes it into Jungkook's hands. Surprisingly, the mentioned guy is slouched on his beige couch, wearing one of his baggy shirts and loose sweatpants with his hair looking like he hasn't brushed them for days.
Taehyung's eyes meet yours as soon as you step in, noticing the mess around including two pizza boxes thrown on the floor and empty cans of coke and beer on the coffee table. "Oh, thank god!" Taehyung breathes out the same sigh of relief, causing you to greet him with a confused 'hello'.
Although, you don't wait for any reaction because your best friend finally acknowledges your presence in his home, head lazily turning in your direction as you walk up to him.
"Great," he mutters, almost rolling eyes at the sight of you. "Who called her?" he eyes the two of his best friends, scoffing before he takes a gulp of the beer that Taehyung handed him.
"What kind of reaction is that, asshole?" you react right away, frowning at your best friend that hasn't seen you for weeks and this is his first reaction.
"Don't mind him, please. He's just a little bit drunk right now." Jimin quickly jumps into an action, noticing your fireback and unappreciative tone that's aimed at none other than Jungkook himself.
He rolls his eyes at Jimin words, but doesn't say anything else before Taehyung watches you with cautious doe eyes. He sits in a chair, arm leaned against his knee as he anxiously bites his nails even though he tries to act casual. You don't buy it.
"What the fuck is going on?" you ask them, pointing towards Jungkook that looks like a truck just hit him.
Jimin opens his mouth, but Jungkook glares at him which ends up with him shutting it right away and when you look at Taehyung, he doesn't even spare you a glance.
"Which one of you called her?" Jungkook speaks up, eyeing the two of his friends as they point to each other causing you to snort. Cowards. "I'm fine. I don't see a reason why you make such a big deal out of this. I'm fine."
The fact that he had to repeat the same sentence twice, just proves that no — he's not fine. And before the wheels in your head start to work and roll, Jimin's voice speaks up in a clear, yet quick tempo.
"Kiko broke up with Jungkook."
The room goes silent, faint sounds coming out of the television are filling out the thick silence in the room as Jungkook freezes, not even glaring at his friend that apologetically shrugs at him.
One of the reasons why you haven't got to see your best friend that often is, that he simply found a girlfriend. Trying to combine his work, personal love life and you was already hard. But you get it. You're not mad or annoyed at him, because the two of you still kept in touch. It was just a matter of time until some of you found someone and naturally, there wouldn't be that much time to spend your days together. It was bound to happen and you knew Jungkook would be the first one to find someone.
He's your best friend, but you're not blind. He's one of the most handsome guys you've ever met, not just that but his personality is something that most girls would fall for. His attitude is pissy right now and now, you know the true reason behind it. But the Jungkook you know, is one of the most caring people you know. And not only that, but he's funny, intelligent and perfect at almost everything. He's the whole package and any girl would be lucky to snatch him.
And that girl, or perhaps you should say a woman, happened to be Kiko. A Japanese beauty that their mutual friend introduced them to one another. It clicked off immediately. Even you've noticed it when Jungkook Rain checked almost every plan you had together. He started to stare into his phone with all those puppy heart eyes whenever she texted him. At first, you found it annoying because it was just plain rude, watching him text her every five seconds instead of trying to hang out with you. But then, you just stopped caring and whenever you went silent, he'd just pushed his phone away and tried to gain your attention.
It was stupid, because you knew if you gave him attitude or silent treatment, he would just feel bad and tried to focus on you. Until the both of you stopped hanging out with each other that much.
"She did?" you mutter, staring at Jungkook who stares in front of him with a wiped out gaze. You've never seen him in this kind of state. "I'm sorry, Kook."
"Yeah, well, shit happens." he grumbles, clenching his jaw as he takes another gulp of beer that's securely clenched in his hand.
You've seen Jungkook having a couple of girlfriends, but you know that his relationship with Kiko was different. He wasn't just any girlfriend that he tried to get to know, she was someone that he completely fell for and couldn't stop talking about. He's in love. And even though he's being an ass to his friends right now, it's just his coping mechanism and you know that whatever Jimin and Taehyung has been doing, hasn't helped much. He plays tough right now, hiding his true feelings under this cold and uninterested facade but you know him better.
And when he keeps glancing at you before he quickly looks away, it's almost as if he can hear your exact thoughts.
"Well," you hastily speak, clapping your hands together as you lightly smile at everyone in the room. "You don't wanna date anyone whose name is Kiko." you try to joke, a laugh and snort erupting from Jimin and Taehyung who has obviously found your little joke funny.
Jungkook on the other hand, looks even more pissed off because he never looked at you with so much anger and annoyance as he's looking right now, causing you to squirm in your spot. "Real class, Y/N." he barks at you, causing you to slump in defeat before Jimin squeezes your shoulders in comfort.
"I brought you banana milk. I didn't know what happened, so I thought this would be a nice and quick save." you lightly tell him, sitting at the end of the couch, next to his sprawled legs but he doesn't move them away.
"Jeez, I'm not some fucking kid. Banana milk won't fix my broken heart." he scoffs, shaking his head while the three of you are even surprised that he just admitted that he has a broken heart. Well, clearly but since he's been putting up this tough act, it still comes as a shock. Judging by the look of Jimin's and Taehyung's face, they seem to think the same thing.
"I know that, Kook," you quietly tell him, hastily grabbing one of his ankles as you squeeze it in a manner to comfort him. He doesn't budge, that means something. "Is there anything we can do for you?" you ask him, not really sure if he's even going to answer that.
His brows furrow while he fumbles with his fingers, the slightest pout adoring his small lips as he thinks your question through. The three of you watch him with curious eyes, wondering what the hell is this guy thinking of. He looks at you, then at Jimin and Taehyung before he softly sighs.
"I mean... there's nothing you guys can do." he says softly, taking another gulp of beer that tastes like piss. Korean beer is just not good, and you're surprised that Jungkook even drinks it. But he never had any problem with any alcohol, that man can drink and eat anything.
There's nothing you can think of that could possibly help him out of his heartbreak. The only thing for you to do, is to be there for him. And if drinking a beer that tastes like piss is some kind of twisted way of helping him, you're in. So, you reach out and grab one of the unopened cans before you open it with a loud 'click', taking a gulp of it.
"What are you doing?" Jungkook sits up, staring at your scrunched nose and distaste written all over your face.
"Drinking with you." you shrug, taking another huge gulp of it. The more you drink it, the less it tastes awful.
"But you hate this beer." he reminds you, scowling at you and your nonstop gulping, hand twitching to get it away from you.
"I know," you shrug, grinning at him. "It doesn't taste that bad. Now come on," you nudge him with your leg, raising your can to him. "Cheers." you call out to him, ignoring his big doe eyes that stare at you with a slight confusion before he sighs.
"Cheers." he mutters, clicking his can against yours before the both of you take another gulp.
The two of you are completely unaware of your friends' faces that are washed with relief and knowing eyes as they stare at you and Jungkook. All it took was just to call you to save the day. Jungkook might not be in his greatest mood or show his appreciation for you to be there for him, but drinking without constant complaining and cursing is still a better result that Jimin and Taehyung managed to get.
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"I've never thought I'd ever drink this much of this piss beer." you croak out, putting another empty can onto Jungkook's messy coffee table. You sit back, head falling onto his shoulder as you silently inhale his scent. It always reminded you of his fabric softener that smells like a baby, mixed with his cologne that is very faint on his clothes.
"How do you know what piss tastes like?" Jungkook asks, raising his brow at you while the corner of his lips twitches in amusement. "Do you wanna tell me about your weird kinks?" he cocks his head at you, causing you to groan as you hit his shoulder but it does nothing to him, he doesn't even budge.
A chuckle roars in the back of his throat, a first sound that can be considered as a positive emotion.
"It's not like that." you mutter, growing embarrassed at the thought of Jungkook thinking about your kinks. Not that you know about them that much. You might think there are some things you might like, but you never had anyone to try it with. How possibly could you know? But the idea of you having a piss kink, or whatever that's called, makes you want to gag. Maybe it's the beer or just a single thought of it, who knows.
Jimin and Taehyung already left, once they saw Jungkook loosening up, they took that chance to go home and leave the two of you alone. Not even once he talked about his heartbreak, you silently watched a TV show that Jungkook turned on whilst drinking a beer and munching on some crackers that Taehyung handed you before they left.
Glancing at Jungkook, his face is illuminated from the screen whilst he's watching a TV show with slightly furrowed brows. And when it finally stops, he sighs and grabs the remote to browse through some other movies and TV shows. He keeps browsing through them for a couple of minutes, muttering a pair of curses when he can't find anything he likes. You turn on the lamp in the very corner of his living room, causing him to frown even more from the sudden light.
You sit next to him, staring at him as he sighs and looks back at you. "What?" he asks unbothered, the remote still clutched in his hand.
"I'm sorry, Kook," you tell him silently, reaching for his shoulder which you squeeze in comfort, like you previously did with his ankle. "I know that you loved her."
And you see his facade crack, when he sucks his bottom lip as he quickly looks away from you to blink away the tears that are threatening to fall. You've never seen him this vulnerable.
"Love," he mutters, causing you to let out a confused 'huh?' in response. "Not loved her, but love. I still love her." he corrects you.
"Why did she break up with you? You don't have to tell me if you don't feel comfortable enough, but you guys seemed so close together."
It doesn't make any sense. Jungkook kept talking about her even through your messages, and you could practically feel the happiness radiating from his single messages. His whole Instagram is filled with their pictures, or just single shots of Kiko that Jungkook has taken and captioned with a single heart emoji. You've never seen him being so in love before. That's when you've realized that Kiko is different from any other women that Jungkook was seeing.
You don't push him into answering, the last thing you want for him is to get upset with you. But you can't keep walking around eggshells for this whole night.
"Apparently, she just wants some time for herself. She wants to explore other things, whatever the fuck that means." he bitterly chuckles, eyes filled with anger but you know it's just hidden hurt.
"Maybe you'll find someone else, Kook. You're still young."
Scoffing, he shakes his head. "She's the love of my life. I really doubt there's someone else for me. I was about to ask her to move in with me."
Shit, he's really serious about her.
"You did?"
He nods, biting onto his lower lip before he lets it go, fumbling his eyes before he sighs in defeat. "I love her." he whispers, his voice sounding so vulnerable that it makes your heart clench.
You go straight into hugging him, enveloping his huge body to yours as he starts to cry into your chest. For the first time, he finally breaks in front of someone else rather than himself. He clutches to your body, tears wetting your shirt but you don't mind it, grabbing him even tighter. He cries, something he doesn't usually do in front of everyone. You realize how he kept holding himself in front of Taehyung and Jimin when all he wanted was to cry it out.
"It's okay, you're going to be okay." you tell him, cheeks pressed against his hair that got super long since you've last seen him.
He sniffles, wiping his eyes before he slightly pulls away. "It happened two weeks ago and I'm still such a fucking mess." he scoffs at himself.
"Two weeks ago?" you exclaim, surprised by the new information. "It happened two weeks ago and I know just... now?"
He glares at you and you quickly shut your mouth. "Not everything is about you, Y/N." he reminds you.
Rolling your eyes, you're about to curse at him for being so rude but then you remember his state. He's just hurt and in a way, he's right. "No, that's not what I meant. I just... I'm surprised that you didn't tell me sooner. If it weren't for Jimin, I don't think I'd be here right now." you explain, thinking about all possibilities that could happen.
"I was going to," he mutters, reaching for a bottle of water instead as he takes a few gulps. "But I needed some time to myself. I didn't want anyone to see me like this." he points out towards his slightly puffed eyes.
You just wished he'd tell you sooner. But you don't tell him that. It's not selfish to think that, because you just wanted to be there for him sooner. Nobody should go through such a heartbreak alone. Not when he has you and other two friends willing to be there for him.
"You know that you can tell me anything, right? I'm always here for you." you remind him, flushed cheeks when you see his eyes already set on you.
The friendship between you and Jungkook is mostly surrounded with you teasing each other and in a way, he's like an older brother to you. You don't get all sentimental with each other, even though you're always there for one another. It's an unspoken rule and natural feeling that your friendship has.
"I know," he says softly, giving you the best little smile he can muster. "And I'm so grateful for that. I know I was acting like an asshole and I'm sorry, I just... I'm really happy that you're here."
You don't get to hear such words often, especially coming out of Jungkook's mouth, but that's why you're even more pleased to hear them.
You smile back at him, silently thanking him and also saying that it's okay and you get it. It's quiet for a moment. Jungkook fumbles with his fingers as you silently watch him, noticing a few new tattoos that decorate his honey skin.
"Y/N?" he asks suddenly, causing you to hum in return. " You know when you asked me, if there's something you could do for me?"
"Oh, boy. What is it this time?" you joke, causing him to silently chuckle under his breath.
What could he possibly want to know? The last time he wanted something from you, was to clean his whole apartment because he twisted his ankle. But whatever that comes out of his mouth next, never occurred to you before.
"Can you pretend to be my girlfriend?"
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© 𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐫𝐨 (𝐧𝐨 𝐫𝐞𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐭𝐬 𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐬𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐨𝐰𝐞𝐝) | don't forget to reblog ♡
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