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#it's 9am and i have to wake up at 5pm cause i decided to go to the barber's tonight

jneth1lary · 3 years

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things suck

i’ve been off this site for a while and i never had the intention of coming back. but tumblr is the only thing that is somewhat private to me and no one else except some people in my real life knows about and it seems like a right place for me to rant and i’m sure no one would actually bother about.

past 3-4 years since i started working at this place, i always thought to always give it my best efforts and my all. never said no to work if i could help it. always do extra because thats the issue with being the only staff employed. but i didnt mind due to liking the job. i am able to clock in and out a little flexibly and i like the environment. the best part was having a boss who was roughly around my age, that i can talk to frankly. i was able to tell him problems and we were friends. it felt like a great thing.

started out fine until shit hit the fan the past few months. work started coming in for two very different things. i needed to help with the setup of a new F&B outlet as my boss wanted one. all the while, i still had to do my original work which was to manage the office, ensure bills were paid on time, ensure the office staff’s items like TP, soap etc was on hand, arrange for weekly cleaner to come in and ensure they are paid their daily wage. that was only just part of my responsibilities. again, i thought “sure, i can do these things,”

boss started to employ an interior designer for the outlet. he started out fine but turns out to be a pompous arsehole. he would give a date for when some items to come in. things won’t show up on time or workers won’t show up on time. the whole debacle caused delays for my own job and coordinating with others related to the outlet including brand owners and staff.

when he needs my help, he would call me and expect me do deliver miracles on the day itself. “I need a pickup truck by 5pm today to get X from Y.”

what am i to do but call for company car just to do such things? and requesting for it at the 11th hour made things hard for everyone. still, i complied.

when he needed plants, i went around and drove him from opposite ends of the earth since 9am. and around lunch time, he didnt even have the courtesy to tell me he wants to go off for lunch. instead, he left me waiting in the car for a good half hour as he was eating his own lunch.

when i brought things up because i cannot see them, i got branded as being repetitive and unreliable. snarky comments were made like “if you tell me once, its already enough. dont have to worry about this. if i dont give you, that means its not ready.”

that may fly for normal work places but my work is reliant on him to give me things on time so i could proceed with applying for government related permits. he even had the gall to say “that permit is not needed.” this is after he owes me the renovation floor plans for 3 weeks.

all that aside, he complains about me to my boss who believes every single word he said. i got a huge scolding for not performing properly the past few months cause of this. worse is this boss made lots of personal attacks. none of them were very work related and all of them very personal.

he said the way i talk to the other staff at the outlet was mean. he said that i have an attitude problem. he said that i cant even do simple matters right but he never fully mentions what except that i’m not on time. he compared me to senior members in the company who were here for 20 years and how they were always “on the ball” and that they never let messes get to their bosses’ ears.

all the while he says things like he gave me higher salary than others despite how people dont typically give others of my position that privilege. i never asked for it and he willingly gave it to me only to hang it over my head insincerely. he also said that he helped my sister with scholarship things for her studies. to my knowledge, the fund was set up to help students and he was the one who suggested i get my sister to apply for it.

since then, i get terrible anxiety just thinking about meeting my boss. waking up in the morning, i was upset that i woke up. because that would mean i have to get into work.

work was all i could think about. even when i am off work. i can hardly have a conversation with my husband and being mentally there with him.

this has to stop.

it was during the final week of december that i decided that i had enough. no more rushing around the town to buy supplies the outlet needs. no more cleaning up after the manager who was hired but unable to perform simple tasks. (story for another time)

i’ve grown weary of actually doing more than i am asked of. i’ll do what i can and no more and less. if he chooses to fire me, i can honorably say i did my best.

this post is just a reminder of these things. so i can look back and said i did it. and i’m happier for it

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ateezthings · 5 years

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Sunday mornings with ATEEZ

Fluff

Gender neutral :)

Seonghwa

- Seonghwa probably wouldn’t sleep in that much, so he got up at 10am to make some coffee

- you woke up from the faint coffee smell

- hearing him rummaging through the cupboards was quite comforting

- after a while he got back to your bedroom with two cups of coffee in his hands: ‘Morning beautiful’

- the next few hours consisted of you resting your head on his chest, him talking about funny moments that happened this week and both of you just enjoying each other’s presence

- at some point your stomach growled so you decided you would go out for lunch

Hongjoong

- when Hongjoong sleeps, he’s out, so you would probably be the first one to wake up on Sundays

- you turned around to look at him and he looked like the most beautiful human being you had ever seen: his perfect lip shape and his cute nose, eyes closed, completely at peace

- you could spent all day just looking at him sleeping

- Hongjoong would probably wake up at around 12/1pm

- maybe you would’ve already gotten up and made a big breakfast with pancakes, coffee, juice and some fresh fruit

- he would arrive in the kitchen, sleepily rubbing his eyes and hugging you from behind as you tried to flip the next pancake: ‘Good morning, Joongi, did you sleep well?’

- times where you could have breakfast together were rare, so you enjoyed every moment of it

Yunho

- cuddles, lots of cuddles

- Yunho‘s big frame was practically yearning for cuddles from you while you two were still half-asleep

- he wouldn’t let you go

‘Yunho, baby, I need to pee’ ‘No, don’t leave me’

- Yunho would probably be fully awake by 11am so he opened the curtains while you prepared breakfast

- omelet would be his favorite, so you made that

- after that you realized the sun was shining outside so you two decided to go for walk before lunch

Yeosang

- Yeosang wakes up quite early but on Sundays he would like to stay in bed with you

- he would be awake at 9am

- you two would be lying in bed, spooning, and he would take your hand and just look at it, trying to memorize every part of it

- mornings would be your favorite with him because he didn’t wear any makeup and you could see his beautiful skin and most importantly his birth mark

- his voice would be lower than usual and he would be half whispering

- it was so comfortable lying in his arms, quietly talking to one another, occasionally stealing some kisses

- later while having breakfast you two liked to listen to indie music

San

(my heart)

- you would be in one of his arms and shiber would be in San’s other arm, that’s how you woke up on Sundays

- San is a cuddly person but Sunday mornings would be on another level

- he would cuddle you so tight, while he was still asleep

- San wouldn’t wake up easily, so he would maybe get up at 1pm,

- you two would try to make breakfast together

- big emphasis on try

- San would constantly sabotage you by messing around with the waffle batter

- so batter ended up on the ceiling and you two had to shower because you had flour all over you

- it was the most fun you two had though

Mingi

- now Mingi will not be responsive till 3/4pm, he’s out

- you tried to wake him up at some point because you were bored but Mingi would not wake up

- when he finally woke up from his coma-like sleep he would be very hungry

- so you decided to get some pizza

- not actually a breakfast food but at this point it was 5pm so who cares

- arriving back home you just kinda hung out in the living room, showing each other your favorite songs at the moment and talking about what they reminded you of

Wooyoung

- Wooyoung doesn’t seem like a morning person so the earliest he could wake up on Sunday’s was maybe 12pm

- after he woke up he would be kinda quiet and still sleepy

- when you made him some food that would change though

- his face lit up when he saw that you made coffee and some toast

- I feel like Wooyoung would like to call his mom at some point on Sundays

- so he would be calling her sitting on the sofa, your legs over his lap while you were reading a book

- you loved that he was so caring towards his family

- in the afternoon you would go out to a cute cafe to drink some tea and get something sweet

Jongho

- this boy would be in baby modeTM on Sunday morning

- don’t wake him up before 11pm or he will be cranky and pouty the whole day

- expect to hold him close to your chest while he tries to go back to sleep

- after a savory breakfast Jongho would persuade you to go running with him in the park

- it was nice: the sun was out, people were taking walks and there would be lots of dogs around

- you couldn’t keep up with him though cause he was pretty fast

- he would cheer you on a lot: ‘Come on, babe, it’s only 10 mins more, you can do it’

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study-magic · 3 years

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PHOTO: Kai Pilger, Unsplash

I’ve heard lots of people have been struggling to sleep properly, so I’ve combined some tips to get a proper rest! Not much, but I have put it under a keep reading thingy, so it doesn’t mess up your dashboard!

1. Routine, routine, routine

I am sure you’re so sick of hearing this already, but the human body is a sucker for a solid routine. Set yourself a time for when you want to go to sleep, and a time to get up. I still slip up sometimes, cause nights tend to drag on when you find a new show to binge, but I have noticed that as long as I get up at roughly the same time each morning my body forgives and forgets. Also, is completely alright to not wake up at the same exact time each day. I tend to wake up anywhere from 9am - 11am and that seems to be alrighty for my brain. We’re all different though, so see and try what works for you!

2. Avoid those caffeinated drinks

Caffeine is there to keep you awake, so if it’s past 5pm (or ~7-8h before your bedtime) switch that coffee/tea up for a decaf alternative. I am a sucker for green tea, but I have noticed that if I drink even a tiny bit of it after 5pm I am not going to sleep until at least 3am. If you are really graving something to drink, and water isn’t gonna cut it try naturally caffeine free teas or some decaf coffee. Also, try to avoid too sugary stuff, cause sugar means energy!

3. If you wanna drink tea, boy do I have a recipe for you!

I discovered this tea for myself a few years ago when I had a proper herb garden. You take some peppermint, lavender and valerian root (if it’s available in your area, if not then fuck it). Not much is needed, as all these things have an incredibly strong taste, but decide on the amounts yourself, based on how you like the flavour (I really hate the taste of valerian, so I’d put the tiniest amount of that, like 3-4 leaves of peppermint and a leaf or two of lavender). Let that steep for about 3 minutes. If you want you can add honey, but I’m not a massive fan so I never did really.

Drink a cup of that, and I’m getting tired even just thinking about it. Truly magical.

4. A sleep sachet, cause we’re like that

I don’t really have any magical witch tricks, but I do have a sleep sachet. To make it I took some peppermint (genuinely an amazing plant) and threw it into like a bag, I had some moonstone around, so threw like tiny fragments of that into it, and topped it off with some lavender oil that I had laying around. I guess you could put valerian in there, but honestly it smells nasty and makes your cat go crazy, so I don’t fully recommend. Tie that lil bag up and throw it under your pillow. The smell of lavender will either make your headache (in which case ignore this point and just throw the sachet away kid), or it will make you fall asleep in like seconds.

5. Count back from a hundred, just do it

Counting sheep is for boring people, I am a man of science so I count back from a hundred. It’s best if you do it slow, and try to get your breathing to match up with the counting. For additional effort, do it in a foreign language. Doing it in a foreign language helps me focus on the numbers so my mind won’t start to wonder, and it improves your language skills, so what’s to lose!

It is important to note though, that if you have serious problems with your sleep the best bet is to call up your GP and complain. Get some medical help, it’s always worth it!

#sleep #sleepless #tips #sleep tips #night #nighttime #green witch #witch tips

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kalidoesgenes · 6 years

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A (Thurs)day in the Life of a 2nd Year UoM Genetics Student

I have been busy this week, because we are in our month of labs. We now have labs three times a week for four weeks. In other weeks, these hours are empty for independent study and naps. I am suffering a severe culture shock. For that reason, I’ve decided to go with random days rather than a straight week. Apart from trying to find more time when I’m already busy, it will also mean that I can show you a day from a non-lab week as well.

I’ve also decided to include today because I feel like it’s important (for me) to be open about mental health and learning how to handle stress.

8am: I generally try to get up at 7am, but I’m feeling particularly stressed and tense this week. I’m not getting as much work done as I would like and I constantly feel like I’m missing or forgetting something, even though, when I make a list, everything is fine. Not optimal, but well within parameters. I play crush crush some more. My wrist hurts, and I’m not sure I’m having fun any more.

9am: I’ve eaten some oatmeal and left early, so I can do a bit of work before my 10am lecture. I finish typing up some notes in the neat little study cubbies outside the lecture theatre.

10am: I like developmental biology, which is one of my optionals. I also like that the professor prints off the slides for us, so I don’t have to get my own. I also like the professor. I like most professors. They are adorkable. Also, we have one who looks like Johnny Lee Miller, which is always nice.

11am: straight into labs, where we will be using light microscopes to examine the slides we’ve made over the past two days. I hate light microscopes. I can never see through both eye thingies at the same time, no matter how I adjust it. I spend an hour struggling with it and then we go to lunch. I pick up a meal deal, with some coke and cake, then go home to watch an episode of Friends and play crush crush some more before going back to fight the stupid microscope some more. I happen to live very near the university, so I can accomplish this within an hour.

1:40pm: Back to wrestling with the stupid microscope. I can see through one eye at a time (though the squinting is kind of painful), so I’m able to make some drawings. The professor tells me my drawings are wrong, but gets distracted before telling me why. I try again. They’re still wrong. I tell him about the struggles with the microscope and he suggests that maybe there is something fundamentally wrong with my eyes and I will never be able to use a microscope properly. I start to cry. The short version is; stressful, tiring week, too much caffeine and sugar, and I hate not being able to do things. The long version is, abusive/neglectful childhood in which I was not allowed to express emotions so I still struggle to express them reasonably, along with very low self-esteem, imposter syndrome which has just been confirmed by finding something I can’t do, triggering the fear that I have now reached saturation point and will never be able to do or learn anything more and the slide into failure will now begin, low sleep, high stress, and high sugar/caffeine.

The professor isn’t actually mean, just matter of fact and concerned. He suggests we go into another lab and finds me an alternative microscope with a different kind of eye-thingy. I struggle with that for a bit, then go off for a quiet ten minute cry in the toilets. I consider making myself sick, which is my stress response. The longer version is, I used to get sick a lot as a child - migraines and lactose intolerance - and I would usually feel better after throwing up, which may have caused a connection between vomiting and relief in my brain. Speaking of LI, my mother insisted I was making myself sick on purpose, force-feed me to the point of vomiting (either due to lactose or too much food) then feed me Tabasco sauce as a punishment. This would make me sick again.

In short, it’s possible that I am so attuned to this abuse that I started doing it to myself as a punishment. I realised this was a possibility a few months ago and vowed to not make myself sick again. What’s the bloody point of going no-contact if I just do it to myself?

2:30pm: I did not make myself sick. I went back to the microscope and churned out some more drawings, then we have a session on what we were supposed to have discovered. Based on this, I think my drawings were fine; if I’d had a bit more time and a bit less stress/panic, and maybe some calm answering of questions, I’d have got it. This doesn’t immediately make me feel better, but does help later. We hand in our lab books; I’m quite pleased with mine. We have the weekend to create an image based on our slides and write a figure legend; I’m confident about doing this based on the final lecture session.

3pm: I decide to go to the library to try to work for a bit rather than go home and play videogames again. Crush crush looms over me. I get a soda and some m&ms, then try to work for an hour or so, but the internet is playing up and my focus is shot, so I go home.

5pm: there is only crush crush. And maybe some other work inbetween. And episodes of Friends.

8pm: I tell my boyfriend that I’m not sure Crush Crush is even fun any more. I don’t tell him about the pain in my right wrist. My mother had surgery for carpal tunnel a few years ago, and while carpal tunnel is not actually hereditary, the narrow bone structure at the wrists which is a contributing factor is. I like my delicate wrists. That’s what my arms look like. I don’t want them to have to change. I also have a bit of a phobia of general aesthetic, and, despite having had local anaesthetic within the last few years, I, deep-down in my bones, don’t really believe it works. So I don’t want to have any kind of surgery. At this point, I delete Crush Crush. I may have deleted my progress or I may be able to get it back. I don’t want to check. I feel an instant sense of relief.

9pm: I did some work then started playing Cinderella Phenomenon, a visual novel in which you play as a cursed princess trying to break that curse by helping others to break theirs. I get the bad ending for Rod, play again making different choices (while taking notes in a spreadsheet because that’s how I roll), and then go through again picking all the good choices to finally get the good ending. While doing this, I tidied up, sorted out my stuff for tomorrow, and did my laundry.

1:30am: ...okay, it took me this long to play through Rod’s storyline. At least I’m playing this game because it’s fun and interesting and not because I feel compelled to get just a few more clicks. I go to bed and listen to a hypnosis podcast on removing anxiety. I’ve set tomorrow’s alarm to 9am, because my first lecture is at 11am. Right now, I feel like sleep and recovery are more important than waking up early.

#day in the life #Week in Kali's Life #mental health #ADHD #addiction #studyblr #bioblr #labs #laboratory

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entrepreneurnut · 4 years

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Productivity Hacks For Solopreneurs

New Post has been published on https://entrepreneurnut.com/productivity-hacks-for-solopreneurs/

Productivity Hacks For Solopreneurs

If you’re a solopreneur then I’m sure you, like me, now how important it is to be as productive with your time as possible.

However, many solopreneurs find it difficult to stay focused and productive when working alone.

There are a huge number of distractions all around us that suck or time and prevent us from moving forward.

Fortunately, there are a number of productivity hacks for solopreneurs that you can leverage to make yourself as efficient as possible.

The more effective you are with your time, not only will you reach your goals considerably faster, you’ll also have more time to spend with the people you love doing the things you enjoy.

10 Productivity Hacks For Solopreneurs & Entrepreneurs

Master your phone

As useful as they are, the phone is a huge distraction and productivity killer.

Here are some important tips to improve your productivity by mastering your phone:

Don’t switch on your phone during the first or last hour of the day (your sacred hours)

Put your phone on silent while working

Put your phone out of view when you’re working

Don’t look at your phone during your working blocks of time

Don’t check your phone during a working block when you’re stuck or procrastinating on a task

Don’t take unscheduled called calls during the day

Figure out your peak productivity times

We all have different times of the day when we’re at our most productive and most creative.

There’s not a one size fits all solution here. You’ll need to find your times and then schedule your tasks around what works best for you.

For example, some people love to wake up early while others are night owls. If you find that your mind seems to be the most focused during the evenings then that might be your most productive time of the day.

Personally, for myself I’m the most focused during late morning, so this is the time I focus on creative tasks like writing. I then reserve the afternoon for tasks that I can do well without having to think too hard about them.

Morning routine

If you can win the first hour of the day then you have a much stronger chance of winning the rest of the day.

There is a saying that the first hour of the day is the golden hour and so, should be dedicated to ourselves.

Use this hour to do things for yourself that will enhance your overall health, well being and sharpen our mind.

In this video below from Brian Tracy, he recommends spending the first hour reading something inspirational, motivational or something that you can learn to improve your income.

youtube

Here is a shortlist of things you can do to set you upright during the first hour of your day:

Meditate

Stretch

Work out

Read something positive

Journaling

Affirmations

You don’t need to spend the first hour on just one of these tasks. You can spend 10, 15 or 20 minutes on a few different ones.

To give you an example, at the moment the following is working well for me:

Stretch – 10mins

Meditate – 10mins

Read – 30mins

Affirmations – 10mins

Experiment with it to find what works for you.

Evening routine

Just as important as your morning routine is having a solid evening routine.

Make the final hour of your day a sacred time for you to wind down and get into a good state of relaxation before bed.

If you don’t do it at the end of your working day, then writing down the tasks you need to get done for the next day can be done at this time. Getting them out of your head and onto paper will help to clear your mind.

Don’t look at any type of screens within this last hour before bed. That includes TV and your phone as well as computers.

Sleep is super important for productivity and studies have shown that the blue light from screens will inhibit the production of melatonin, the hormone our body produces to help us sleep.

Blue light blockers can help, however, engaging with your phone, computer or the television before bed will stimulate the mind and inhibit a good night’s sleep.

See also: How you can make money on Pinterest without a blog

Listen to music

Listening to music can be a great way to help get you into your flow state.

I find instrumental music the most effective during my creative hours as music with lyrics can often be distracting. When I’m working on tasks that don’t need a lot of focus then it doesn’t seem to matter if the music has lyrics.

We’re all different so you’ll need to experiment and find what kind of music works best for you.

My personal favourites that I find the most effective when working is inspirational soundtrack music or upbeat classical music.

Definitely do not listen to playlists on YouTube while you’re working unless you have a paid subscription to YouTube otherwise you’ll be interrupted by annoying ads every few minutes. This can really kill your focus.

Tap into your flow state

You’ve probably heard of the term “flow state” before. It’s the state of mind that top athletes and high achievers get into for peak performance.

Some people also refer to it as “being in the zone”.

We’ve likely all had experiences of being in a flow state where you seemed to have an unbelievably sharp focus and everything seems to flow. However, for most people, these times are very few and far between and they have no idea how to access it at will.

Fortunately, we all have the ability to do it as it’s a state of mind that we can all access.

It’s like a muscle and the more you flex it, the stronger it will get.

I’ve also noticed that it seems to be easier to get into flow state during our highest hours of creativity.

Here’s how to start to train your flow state:

Remember a time when you were in a state of flow, where you had a single-minded focus and were super productive. It may also be a memory of when you operated at peak performance when you played sport at school

The feelings are the key. Recall the feelings you felt in your body when you were in that flow state

Practice recalling those feelings at different times throughout your day, and especially before to sit down to do your most important work

Use and keep to a schedule

If you’re like most entrepreneurs then you’ll likely have hundreds of tasks you need to get done, but no time to do them.

The key is to schedule them.

First, schedule your days into chunks of time where you’ll be the most effective at getting different types of tasks done.

For example, if you’re really creative between 9am – 12pm then schedule all your creative tasks during these hours over the coming days.

Then, decide which tasks you can do without much thought. Those tasks can be assigned to your afternoon between say 2pm – 5pm when you come back from lunch.

For admin tasks, you can choose one day per week, say a Friday for example, where you spend the last 2-3 hours of the day getting your admin tasks done.

See also: Effective ways to make money with ClickBank

Schedule breaks

Scheduling breaks is also really important. I used to schedule no breaks at all, I’d even used to eat a sandwich for lunch while I was still working. That’s really dumb.

I thought I needed to work every second of the day I had in order to get things done.

Interestingly, once I started scheduling breaks throughout my day I found I got more done, was able to get into the flow state more easily and was happier.

For lunch I now take one and a half hours and also use that time to relax and go for a walk or even have a nap if I need one

Don’t check email first thing in the morning

Similar to turning your phone on first thing in the morning, this is also another productivity killer.

Replying to emails first thing in the morning is like saying to your subconscious, “other people’s agendas are more important than mine”.

Before you know it, you’ll have spent a considerable amount of your day prioritising other people’s needs while your important tasks pile up, spill over to another day and cause you more anxiety.

I’ve still not found the perfect time for me yet to check my emails, but it’s certainly not first thing in the morning. At the moment, I’m reserving 30-45mins per day after my creative morning time and before lunch to check emails and this is definitely working better.

If there are emails that I haven’t got to check in this time period and are not urgent, they can wait until the next day.

Use online tools and automations

There are loads of great tools out there you can use to automate some of your tasks.

Some simple ones include setting up automated email replies or using the free Voice Typing feature to create lists or even write articles in Google Sheets.

There are also loads of other cool software programs that can help you with more advanced tasks.

For example, Todoist is a great software app you can use to organise all our tasks. You can also sync it with any smartphone to organise and schedule your emails for you.

IFTTT is another great app you can use in combination with all kinds of other apps to automate tasks to simplify your work as well as other areas of your life.

Here’s a great article that shows you 35 ways to automate your life with IFTTT.

Hire a VA

If you’ve not done it before then hiring a VA might not be as expensive as you think.

You can find skilled workers to do certain tasks for you at very reasonable rates.

Some good places to look to a VA for ad-hoc tasks include fiverr.com and upwork.com.

If you’re looking for a VA on a part-time or full-time basis then I highly recommend taking a look at onlinejobs.ph.

Final Thoughts

Keeping away from the phone the first hour of the day and during your working blocks as well as not checking your email several times a day are two of the best things you can do to improve your productivity and get stuff done.

Are there any productivity hacks for solopreneurs that are not on this list that work well for you? Let me know in the comments below.

#Entrepreneur #productivity hacks #solopreneur

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neighbourskid · 4 years

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Have You Ever Been To See London Town

(original date: 01 November 2015)

Here We Are In London Town

As some of you might've read in one or the other post, I planned on going to London this fall. Well, that happened two weeks ago and now I am here to tell you all about it. Because I got a lot to tell you guys from the interwebs. But no rambling now. Without further ado, I present to you: my week all alone in London.

It was Tuesday, October 20th, very very early in the morning. My mom drove me out to the airport in Basel where I would take off around 7am. My mom did not come into the airport, so I had to do the check-in and baggage stuff all by myself - for the very first time. Whenever I flew before it had always been in a group and I had just watched what the others did and then did that. But not this time. No. I had to figure it out myself. But I got that done eventually and found myself at my gate, waiting very bored for boarding. To pass the time I typed out my thoughts on my phone, which is what I wanna show you right now.

It's 5:53am, I'm sitting next to Gate 31 at EuroAirport in Basel. I just had a croissant and a (absolutely horrible) coffee from Columbus Café. Boarding is in approximately half an hour, flight takes off at 7am. If everything goes accordingly to plan, I will be in London at 8.15am. I am rather bored right now but the other people here do not look any better than me. There's a rather old man in a brown leather jacket and an old woman who don't sit next to but apparently know each other. Next to the woman sits a 40+ dude, with moustache and a green-white scarf, who knows them as well. Opposite me sit two 50+ gentlemen, both tapping on their (allegedly) iPhone 6s's, being all business and shit. One of them wears old people shoes and a beige trench coat, the other looks like Prince Charles. Then there's a blonde woman with a coffee, who doesn't mean to but looks rather lonely and sad. Then behind me sits some dude in a red-black caro shirt. No idea what he looks like. The coffee shop is getting more and more busy the closer we get to boarding time. Which is odd because that coffee is crappy as hell. Well, maybe they can make Latte's now and not just plain coffee or espresso. It's past 6am now. I am still very bored. I could keep looking at these people and analyse them, but it is not that interesting to be honest. But hey, the old dude in the brown leather jacket just moved to sit next to his wife (?), cause the other dude went away. Oh, my mom just sent me a text. Maybe I'll meet someone I know. That'd be rather funny.

You get the idea. I was very bored. A bit later I go on and on about all the people around me, give them names like "The Italians" or "Donald Trump", "Mulan" and "Princess Diana". I write about every new person who arrives. It was entertaining for the time being.

It was 6:40am when I finally sat on my seat (23A). At this point I started to write on my phone again about what was happening, what I was doing, the people around me and other things. A little before we started going down again we got little sandwiches for breakfast, which was very lovely. I have to say here that I really love flying. I love it. Especially when I have a window seat. Because, if not too tired, I will stare out the window the whole flight and look at the clouds and the stuff beneath us, watch how houses and people and cars get smaller, take pictures of sunsets and sunrises - I just really enjoy flying.

After arriving at Heathrow Airport I took the tube to Tottenham Court Road, which was the best station to find my hotel from. Which I didn't. Well, not immediately. I walked around for at least half an hour trying to get a wifi signal somewhere so I could google my hotel. I did find it in the end. But waaaaaay to early. They had said my room would be available around 2pm, and when I arrived it was something between 10 and 11am. I could leave my baggage at the reception, which I did, and then went out to, well, get to know the place. But I had made some mistakes in my thought process. Which you will understand after you read the entry I made in a notebook.

It's 11am. I'm sitting in a Starbucks somewhere near Oxford Street in London. My coffee is still too hot to drink, but it's standing here waiting for me. When confronted with the fact that I couldn't go to my room until 2pm, I reacted very very stupidly. Because I took literally nothing more with me than my phone (with 30% charge at the time) and money. I could've just simply taken my bag. But no. I left it with the other one at the reception. Stupid me. So I went out, walked a bit until I found a McDonald's, where I ate some crappy breakfast burgers. Then I went to Sainsbury's to buy a pen and this notebook. And then I came here. To spend the remaining three hours. I just wanna shower actually. And be alone for a bit. Until I go to Madame Tussauds at around 3pm. My phone is at 15% now by the way. Not sure if I can find back to my hotel without my phone, though. Hopefully. Coffee is still hot as.....whatevers. I don't think I'll ever go alone on vacation ever again. I've only been here for what, two hours? I don't like being alone in a place I don't know that well. I feel odd. And am a bit afraid. And with my thing with many people in little space this all doesn't get much better. I hate being in crowded places. At least this place is rather empty. God, I'm so tired. What I love about this place is the language, though. I love English. And I love the accents. Very very much. But enough of my chit-chat. Imma write a bit now.

And then I wrote. I wrote a little Leverage ficlet. It did the job.

In the end, I went back to my hotel with 1% charge left on my phone. After I got lost trying to pass time. But hey, I found the place again and all was well. I took my shower, I was alone. Then I went to Madame Tussauds (nearly panicked on the way because I thought I was going to be too late) and it was awesome. I took loads of pictures and selfies and I enjoyed the place very much. Looking back, my first day alone in London was a great success. *happy face*

A Foggy Day in London Town

We wrote Wednesday, October 21st, it had been 8am and I had probably just woken up. Looking outside the window I saw what I had heard after waking up: it was raining pretty effing strong. But hey, that's London, amiright? Well anyway. On Wednesday I actually planned on getting up at around 9am, but I was an hour too early. Well, didn't matter, because this way I was able to watch the Agents of SHIELD episode that had just come out the night before. Which was great. To get you a clearer picture of what was going on in my head, have here another excerpt from my notebook.

It's half past nine in the morning, I'm sitting in that same Starbucks again, drinking my coffee and eating my croissant. It's raining pretty strong. But hey, it's London. What'd you expect. At 11.15am my two friends David and Philipp will arrive at London Euston, coming down from Coventry where they visited another friend of ours, Gabriel. [...] Today I woke up an hour earlier than I planned, but that way I could watch the new Agents of SHIELD episode, which was very very cool. Loving that May is back at SHIELD. Coulson still loves her very much. God It's raining so much. I don't wanna go outside. But I have to go back to the hotel to get more money. And then I have to go meet my friends. Sigh. Going soon.

And then I went. Got back to my hotel, grabbed the money, went to the tube station, travelled to London Euston where I had to wait quite a bit for my friends to arrive. Because, as usual, I was there too early. I scribbled a bit in my notebook to pass the time, thought about writing another ficlet, but then decided on drawing.

When they finally arrived I felt so happy. Not alone anymore. Yay! No seriously, it was very comforting to know someone. And I could finally talk to people. It was very good having them there. Well anyway, I helped them find their hotel so they could put their stuff away. After lunch we walked a bit on Oxford Street, went to Starbucks, Waterstones and HMV. It was a great afternoon. I really enjoyed it. At around 5pm we split again, because I would go and see Hamlet that evening. Which I was very much looking forward to. As shows my notebook.

It is 5:16pm now. I'm back at my hotel, listening to Absolute Radio. Hanging out with Phil and Dave was great. Finally someone to talk to. God. We went to Starbucks, visited some bookstores n'shit. And then went to McDonald's to eat. Maybe we'll chill out again after Hamlet. We will see. I have about an hour of free time now. Will leave around 6pm. I'm looking forward to the piece like VERY FUCKEN MUCH. I mean, it's the Batch. LIVE! And maybe I can catch a picture at Stage Door.

That was that. On the way to Barbican Centre I nearly drove crazy because I forgot to bring an ID, which was necessary, apparently. Well, I did get in without one in the end, so no need to be stressed about that anymore. I sat next to a couple of Germans, who did not know that I could understand them, but that was okay. Sadly, I did not buy a programme, which I still regret now. It's a lovely thing to have. Well anyway. The play began at 7:15pm.

For those of you who have seen it, you understand me. It is hilariously, amazingly, tragically perfect. I mean it was a real joy watching this play. Starting out with Benedict alone on stage, mourning 'his' father, it was a great opening. It just took you in and did not let you go anymore. I still find it so amazing how much presence Ben has in a room. He has this beautiful confidence, I don't know. It was just very very thrilling. And his voice, dear baby Jesus, his voice. I should actually just give up to tell you about this play. I just cannot fathom my thoughts. It was truly mind blowing. The whole play through I had this grin on my lips, this proud smile, because he did it. Benedict had made history. I-...wow. Just wow. And then you'd think it couldn't get any better. You will stand corrected. The play is over, all the actors are on stage, bowing. And then he asks for silence, for attention. And proceeds to hit you with the biggest and most emotional hammer right in your face. He talks with so much passion about how they had been able to collect money for the refugees and he pleads, he begs for us to think, to truly think about what having a home means. And he talks with this eloquence, those beautiful words. He could've put his sword right through my heart and I wouldn't have minded. Because what he tells the audience after every play, every night, is so damn beautiful you cannot not give something. Sigh. Wow. I'm just overwhelmed again right now.

He reads the beautiful poem Home by Somali poet Warsan Shire during that speech, and I just feel like I should put the part he read here as well. You can find the whole poem here.

“no one leaves home unless home is the mouth of a shark you only run for the border when you see the whole city running as well”

It makes me cry everytime I read it. It also includes the beautiful line "No one puts children in a boat unless the water is safer than the land." And here's Benedict's speech as well. Watch it, listen to it. It truly touches your heart.

Mooooving on now. Where was I...

Ah, yes. Well. After the play I, obviously, went out to Stage Door to get a chance for an autograph or a selfie with Benedict, or to at least thank him for what he's done and what he's still doing, and tell him he's doing a tremendous job. I waited with all the others. Waited long. It was cold. But it was at least not raining. We stood there and finally after some time the first actors came out. It did not take long until all of them were through and gone. But for one. Benedict had not shown up yet. Not long after all the others were through, a nice woman from the Barbican Centre came out and said that he had already left and, for that matter, would not be doing Stage Door tonight.

Head hanging low, quite sad, I walked back to Barbican Station to catch the tube. I was torn. I did not know how I should feel. The evening was absolutely fantastic and I loved every second of it. But on the other hand, Benedict was why I even came here. I don't think I would've watched the play if it had not been for him. So I was rather disappointed that he did not show up. But then again I understood. I mean, he has a little kid and a wife at home and you don't wanna be gone for too long. I really understood him. So I was really torn. Not sure what I should do with the fact that I did not get to meet him.

I went back to Tottenham Court Road where Phil and Dave were already expecting me. We then went out and walked about the city for a while, then went into a McDonald's and had a midnight snack, so to speak. They were a good distraction. I would've probably sulked way more if I had just went back to my hotel that night. But I didn't, so yay, night saved. Or so.

London Blues

Thursday, October 22nd. In the morning I accompanied Phil and Dave to the tube station to say goodbye and show them where they had to go to make it to Heathrow Airport. It had been really nice having them there. Nice distraction. We had a good day and a half. Really good. After that I went back into sulking mood, I suppose. I was alone again, I did not get to meet Ben the day before, I was tired, I was sad. Boo :(

But the day would only get better. I didn't do much in the morning after Phil and Dave left, but in the afternoon I had to go to Baker Street. The pick up point for Warner Bros. Studio Tour: The Making of Harry Potter was there. I got there way to early, as usual, and sat in the cold. There were lots of French families going as well, so their little kids ran all around me, being French and rather annoying. Well, the one boy was cute in the beginning but then he started to be annoying as well.

When the bus finally arrived I took a seat and waited for it to begin. To my surprise there was a little TV in the bus. I was still kinda sulking about the day before, but when the driver started the film and the melody came on, I was flashed and completely absorbed by this event. They played the first Harry Potter film. And oh was I smiling like a freak in that bus. It was one of the best bus rides I ever had, for the film alone. But it would only get better.

We arrived at the studios around 4.30pm, I suppose. And then I walked into that building and what happened for the next four hours was pure childhood and it tore me apart. The theme song was playing everywhere, there was Harry's room under the stairs from Privet Drive, there were props and costumes and oh my god. I, wow. I mean, seriously. You cannot imagine what it is like going through these halls if you have not been there.

First we got to watch a film about the studios, kinda behind the scenes stuff, with actors and everything. And then we could walk into the Great Hall. And Oh. My. God. It was everything you would ever dream of. I walked through this studio like the biggest doofus, big grin on my face, shiny lil' eyes. My heart exploding. Because I went there in the Halloween season, they had people walk around as Death Eaters, which was awesome-sauce. Well, I really can barely talk about this whole thing. I just cannot put it into words. But what killed me most of all was the "miniature" of the castle, of Hogwarts. I-....I nearly broke down into tears in that room. Also the train, though. That was a dream come true. Sitting in a booth, walking through the train, hell, standing on platform 9 3/4 alone was just mindblowing.

But what was the worst was the souvenir shop. It comes right after the castle. And you wanna buy everything. Everything. Really, all of it. It doesn't even matter what house you think is the best, you wanna have all the things. All the shirts and hoodies and scarfs and all the wands and the pictures and just everything. I sadly only had money for three things, so I bought something for a friend and the "Have You Seen This Wizard" Sirius Black shirt and also his wand. Because you gotta, right?

But to show you how I really felt about this place, I can only give you the notebook entry I wrote in the coffee shop of the place. Here ya go.

My heart hurts. It's crying. For a time five years gone. This place is as magical as you'd expect. I'm really just flashed. The music, the pictures, the props, the EVERYTHING. It's pure childhood and a walk down memory lane. I really feel like I could break down and just weep. It's heartbreaking somehow. I mean, this were ten years of my life! The first book that was honestly and purely mine was "Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban". The first book I've ever loved. Sirius Black is to date still my all time favourite character in literature. I am so nostalgic right now. I could honest to God just start to cry. I could not imagine a childhood without Harry Potter. I just can't.

My tweets about it are by the way not looking any better. That place really killed me. On the way back they continued the film, but I didn't get to see it until the end because I got out at an earlier stop. Welp. That day is definitely to be scored as a very big success! :D

All Over London

Thank God, it's Friday. Or, well, I don't know. I wasn't really feeling superb that day. HP Studio left me thinking about my childhood, about my family and especially my dad and brother. But given the time that has passed since that particular Friday, I'd rather show you (again) what I wrote that day.

It's Friday. 12:40. Noon. I'm sitting in a Pret-A-Manger, just had a lovely ham and egg sandwich and still have coke and coffee, listening to music. I'm in London. An 8.5 million city. With terrifyingly lots of tourists. And you know what? I am depressingly lonely. I feel so alone. This feeling of "you're the only person on this planet" is very enclosing. Doesn't make a lot of sense, I know. I just don't feel well right now. Next time I'm definitely taking Angie with me. Or Salome. Having some sort of anxiety that involves great uncomfortability in big masses of people doesn't make this place any better. I mean, I felt great being here with Dave and Phil. I felt great in Madame Tussauds, at the theatre and at the Studio yesterday. But now? In this café? I'm feeling shitty as hell. Lonely and depressed. Sad. I really wanna go home actually.

But, mind you, I did not sulk all day in that Pret-A-Manger. I decided to do something that was comforting to me. And books are comforting. Very. So I decided to go to that Waterstones again I was in on Wednesday with Dave and Phil. I thought I'd find it without a problem. "It's on Oxford Street, that should be easy to find" I thought. Well, how do I put that... It wasn't. I got hopelessly lost. After giving up looking for that bloody bookstore, I desperately searched for a toilet. Well, what I found wasn't what I was looking for. But it was also water and stones. After some time of randomly walking around I found myself standing at the edge of the River Thames, staring right at the London Eye across the river. Well, I thought, at least there would be a toilet. And there was! So we could call that a success. I did take some pictures of the London Eye and Big Ben there because, I mean, I was there already, so why not. I also tried to find the lil' drawing Corinne left me three years ago, but it wasn't there anymore. Which does not surprise me actually.

After my failed attempt to find a bookstore I made my way back to my hotel, grabbed some food somewhere on the way and made myself a relaxed evening in my hotel. I really did not do that much on Friday, besides getting lost.

Evening in London

Saturdays are nice days, don't you think? I do rather like them. On my Saturday in London I did a bit of this and a bit of that. But I can best show you that with what I wrote in my notebook. Because boy had I time to write. It is by the way a wonder that I can still read what I wrote that week. I have a horrible scrawl.

Hello again. It is 2:36pm, I'm sitting at Starbucks with my coffee and innocent. At the table next to me sit four Swiss women, chit-chatting, gossiping. Today I made the big mistake of walking through Oxford Street. It's Saturday, it's London. There are millions of people! And I hate 'em all. It's raining again, by the way. I wanna go home to my hotel again, but I don't think my room's been cleaned yet. I'm also fighting with myself about tonight a bit. I planned on going back to the Barbican Centre tonight on time for Stage Door to catch a selfie with Benedict, but I have doubts. What if he doesn't do it tonight either? What if someone recognizes me? I just don't know. Oh, god news! I can work at FashionFriends again next week. Looking forward to that very very much. Because hey: it's a job. My headache is getting worse in this noise. God, I'm so tired. The Swiss women just left. And I think they forgot a bag. But maybe it's just trash. [...] Also, I'm (still) sad. I feel alone. I just wanna sleep. But I guess the possibility of meeting Benedict could make me feel better. So maybe I'm going. I'm somehow looking forward to going home again. Because I'll not be so alone anymore. I have my family there. Any my friends. I feel very tired. And sentimental. And nostalgic. It's 3pm now. I'll probably go back to the hotel soon. Yes. Sigh.

Well, I did go back to the hotel shortly after. I spend the afternoon watching Leverage and building myself up for the night. Because I had decided to go. I had to. Kinda. Well, after watching loads of episodes of the show, I packed my stuff together and left to get dinner. Which concluded in me sitting back at Starbucks at some point and writing again. Which you can read below.

Well, here we are again. Same Starbucks, same coffee, same orange juice. It's 8pm. The play will end around 10.20pm. And I will creep around Stage Door at, I suppose, 10pm. It's the last chance I have. Tomorrow is none. I checked. I wanted to try for one of the thirty 10£ tickets they sell there every day, but no luck there. No play on Sundays. So I gotta go tonight. Monday I'm leaving. And I don't know if I'll ever get the chance to meet him again. So I'm going. Tonight. And hopefully he will be doing Stage Door tonight, hopefully I will get my selfie with him. Hopefully. This would make my holiday really worth it. Cuz it is, initially, what I came here for. It was all about him. The rest is just icing on top of the cake, really. So without that picture, there is not really a cake. Maybe a muffin, yes, but no cake. And I want. That. Cake. But enough of that. I need to entertain myself again. So writing it is.

And so I wrote again. But I'm not gonna tell you about that. There is too much important stuff to tell about that Evening in London. I couldn't sit there and just wait until I had to take the tube. I was getting restless. So I got up after I finished my drinks, left the Starbucks and went on the tube. I was there waaaay to early. But guess what? There were others there already as well. I took my place at the front, next to two German fangirls. One of them complimented my Sirius Black shirt, I said thank you, but did not show that I understood every word they said. It was way too funny that way. And so we waited. In the cold. The play ended, people came out of the theatre, some of them leaving, some of them standing behind us, waiting for the actors as well. Not much after the play ended, a guy dressed in a purple barbican shirt came out and said that Benedict was not likely to come and do Stage Door tonight. There were loads of disappointed sighs, but nobody dared to leave, because what if. You wanna know what I did?

They said he probably ain't coming out, so I said, by God he will. And that's what I did. I prayed. I said to the Lord that if it weren't meant to be for me to meet Ben, then I wouldn't have gotten a ticket in the first place. I mean, why would I have? And so I prayed and prayed and then began to hum "Our God is an awesome God" over and over again.

The other actors came and went. There was a little wooooing when Ciarán Hinds (he played Hamlet's uncle, the King's brother) came out. He was brilliant, by the way. Very convincing.

And I kept humming the song. I kept doing that. I got my ticket out, prepared my phone, and just kept humming. And then he came out. Oh, he was lovely. I watched how he signed other people's tickets and programs and talked a bit, I snapped a few pictures from afar and prepared what I wanted to say to him once it was my turn. I wanted to thank him for what he was doing, tell him that he was brilliant, that the play was amazing. And then politely ask for a selfie. That was the plan.

Well, he came along, signed the German girls's stuff, then stood in front of me, took the ticket that I held to him and signed. But before that he looked at me, tired but happy, and smiled a little. All my plans kicked the curb. I managed to say Hi and Thanks after he handed me the ticket back and then asked for the selfie. He was very lovely about it. He told me that sure, he would take a picture with me, told me to set it up and tell him when I'm ready, he would sign along meanwhile. And so I told him when I was ready, we snapped the picture, he waved, I said thank you, he said pleasure and then signed along.

I climbed out of the masses of people pressing against me, waving their stuff at Ben, and got out to breathe a little. I started to walk away when they started clapping, so I turned and clapped as well. He waved goodbye and off he went.

Oh he is very lovely. Beautiful human being. Very natural. Very...very human. And touchable for that matter. He doesn't seem like this untouchable figure of stardom like maybe a Angelina Jolie or a Brad Pitt does. It was.... it was an amazing experience. And I will never forget it. I will treasure that in my heart forever. I will.

After that I went home, grinning slightly all the time. Having a good time. Looking at the picture every other minute. Staring at my ticket, stunned. It was worth it. It had definitely been the right decision to go. I would not have missed it for anything, looking back at it. Sigh. I'm being nostalgic again right now.

Looking Down on London

There is no better way to tell you about Sunday, October 25th than to let you look into my notebook. Because that little book that I bought out of necessity on the first day was my always comforting companion through this whole week. So yeah, see for yourself.

It was a success! And you know what? I'm happy! I'm not sitting in the Pret-A-Manger across my hotel being all sad and depressed. No! I'm sitting there, happy, smiling to myself, feeling good. Oh, standing in the cold for so long was so worth it. Ben was very lovely. Wished he had more time, though. But hey, he's a busy man. I'm glad I got my selfie and autograph. Thank God for that. God, I'm so happy. My week is made now. It's a bit of a shame he's not on social media. Would've liked to thank him properly. Cause the man is a gift. He's doing so much great work. But enough of that now. It's 11.37am, I'm sitting at Pret's, enjoying coffee & my music. I actually wanted to go to Hillsong Church but, well, I slept. Maybe tonight then. I think I'm gonna go out of the city today. Check out the nature. Go up on a hill or something the like. Find myself some solitude. Cuz I really don't like being surrounded by that many people. But first I have to find a place like that. Seriously, having met Benedict makes this holiday really worth it. I am so damn happy. So, Imma go now. Primrose Hill, here I come.

But before I buggered off into the nature that day, I went into a grocery store, bought my innocent orange juice and some apples. You gotta be healthy sometime, right?

To get to Primrose Hill, I decided to walk through Regent's Park. Which was a brilliant decision. Because that park is beautiful. And despite being rather well visited, you could find some solitude here and there. It was truly a beautiful place. If I lived in London I would probably be there every other weekend. I really enjoyed Queen Mary's rose garden. They were beautiful. It was very lovely. After I made my way through the park, I walked alongside Prince Albert Road to Primrose Hill. The sight you got from there is extraordinary. Truly beautiful. Enjoyed sitting in the grass for a while and just relax. It was what I needed that day, really. Relaxed me very much.

In the end, I did not go to Hillsong Church that evening. I relaxed in the hotel. It was a good idea. But truly, that day was a great one. Very relaxing, very beautiful, the weather was perfect.

From London With Love

Monday, October 26th. That was my last day in London. And a very exhausting one. I did not leave my hotel room until a bit before noon. Then I ate lunch and afterwards went to Starbucks (as always) for one last time. Had a little chat with one of the women working there, cuz she recognized me, because I always went to the same Starbucks. If I come back to London some time, I will definitely go to that one again. Or at least visit once.

I left the place around 3pm and took the tube to Heathrow Airport. Stood the whole fifty minutes. Then I went through all the check-in and security measures, made my way to the waiting place with a coffee, innocent and a cinnamon swirl (which could've been perfect if it weren't for the disgusting raisins that were in there) and sat down. After some time a cute blond dude sat down two rows down exactly opposite me. We occasionally stared at each other. At some point I, jokingly, wrote the following on twitter: "@ very cute blond guy opposite me at @HeathrowAirport next to A11 with the mac book, please know that i'm a girl and please do not be gay"

Shortly after, the official twitter account of Heathrow Airport wished me the best luck and hoped that I managed to get his attention. He, sadly, had just then left. Which the airport was very sad to hear but it hoped I had a great evening nonetheless. Having an airport as your wingman is....great.

Well, with cute blond gone I was rather bored. My flight was hella delayed, as were all flights to Switzerland, and in the end I ended up so late, that I missed my last train that could've brought me to my lil' village. So my mom had to pick me up half way through. Yeah. And I worked the next day, which was very exhausting.

But yeah well, that was my week in London. The post is terrifyingly long, I know, but I hope you enjoyed reading my crap. Cuz it only took a whole afternoon to write it all down. Hehe.

Well, whatever. I wish y'all a good time for now, until I write again.

Cheers!

*happy person cuz I met The Batch*

#blog post #long post #london #benedict cumberbatch #hamlet #harry potter #warner bros studios #import from old blog

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amanisblogofmanythings · 5 years

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Investigating the Writer’s Craft

Task: Write a story for readers your own age. - DRAFT

THE LAST RACE

“What is life?”, I lay in bed thinking to myself. It’s a Friday night and I can’t help but to overthink right as I’m about to sleep. It’s also been exactly a week since I’ve turned 18 and now that I think about it, I’m still so young, yet I feel as though I need to get my whole life together only within the next few weeks. Summer is almost here and I can’t wait to just be off school, so I don’t need to go to classes than work right after, it’s exhausting. My parents raised me to work hard for everything I want and they’re really stern on me graduating from high school and soon going to college to pursue law. I’ve always been good at english and psychology and I wouldn’t mind, but at the end of the day it’s what they want more than what I want.

The more I think about it though, the more it doesn’t add up; You go to school for 18 years of your life. From preschool, to elementary, to middle school and then to highschool. After that, to really succeed, you need to pay thousands of dollars just to get a degree from university just to get a basic 9am-5pm job which most of us wouldn’t even be happy with. Finally after four more years of school, you end up with an average job, you’re in a bunch of student debt, and there’s probably some sort of underlying passion which you wished you could be doing for a lifetime instead of working under somebody else. At the end of the day, people forget about you. You’re just some average bugger living an average life. But think about it, there’s people out there that didn’t follow this norm. There’s people out there that went, “Screw the system, I want to do what I love and I’ll do anything to get there.” These are the people that are artists, astronauts, dancers, and whatever else exists out there. For me, I’d be a racecar driver if I really followed my passions, but what sucks is that I’m a girl and it’d be very unlikely. Holy. Okay I have to stop thinking so much.

I take a few deep breaths as I try to clear my mind, and the millions of things at the back of my head. I begin to fluff up my pillow and shuffle around to get comfortable, and it’s really not working. Moments later, my phone vibrates, perpetuating not being able to sleep. As I unlock my phone, and lower the brightness, I notice the notifications from my all my friends. Amber, Ayra and Iqra were all out, sending me photos and videos on snapchat since I didn’t join them tonight. They’re more rebellious than I am and have the courage to sneak out. I could never do that to my parents. I grin and put away my phone, under my pillow. I close my eyes to the sound of the rain as it begins to pour, tapping onto my window.

The sun glares onto my eyes as I wake up to notice it’s almost 9 in the morning. I always leave my blinds open before I sleep, so I can wake up early the next day with the brightness of the sun on my eyes. Kinda weird, but I love my mornings. I’m always the first one up. I step out of bed into my fluffy pink slippers and rub my eyes to wake myself up more. I go on my phone to see that there’s a car meet going on today. The sun is out, the weather is warm and today would be the perfect day. Car meets are where all car enthusiasts gather at a parking lot and appreciate each other's modified cars. Here in California, the vibes are amazing at these meets and I love to see what others do with their creativity. I’m a huge car head and I was lucky enough to work hard and buy my first car just about a year ago when I was 17. My parents help with the insurance and my part time job pays me enough money for gas and parts.

I step out of my room and head to the kitchen to cook up some breakfast. As I take out toast and eggs from the fridge, I admire the sun gleaming onto whatever’s below it. The day is so beautiful, perfect to wash my car. I fit two toasts into the toaster and start cooking a sunny side up. Eggs and toast will always be my go to. Moments later, my whole grain toasts pop out of the toaster, though I allowed my eggs to cook for just a little longer. For some reason, the sound of the sizzle of eggs on a fry pan is the most satisfying thing ever to me. As my eggs are ready, I flip them onto my toast.

As I bite into my breakfast, I scroll around on my phone to see if there are any higher paying jobs. Since I work as a cashier at a fast food restaurant and only get a few shifts a week, I really need something better to support myself.

“Aliyah can you set the kettle please?”, my mom asks from upstairs. Every morning, she loves to have tea, and every weekend it’s our routine to set the kettle when she wakes up. As my mom steps down the stairs, she asks, “So, do you have anything planned for today??”, “umm yes mom there’s a car thing going on today and I’ll probably go.”, “Please make sure there’s no street racing though Aliyah, it’s dangerous and illegal.”, my mom was cool with me going as long as I stay safe. “Yes mommm don’t worry.” As we finish up our small talk, my dad steps down with his pessimistic attitude, “Oh god Aliyah when are you going to give up on that junk car of yours? Just stick to bussing.”, I rolled my eyes as he spoke. Since I’ve had my car, he’s hated it. Especially because it’s manual. But honestly, nobody would truly understand my passion for driving and cars unless they share this passion with me. Both my parents know I’ve been into speed since I was young. From buying hot wheels instead of barbies to go karting since the age of 4.

As both my parents prepare their tea, I run upstairs to freshen up so I can go outside and give my car a beautiful shine. I always wear my favourite Nascar hat which is beige in color whenever I wash my car on a sunny day. As I dress up, I was considering going to a coin car wash instead of just doing it at home with a hose like I usually do. I mean, I do work hard and have some spare change I could use for recreation like this.

I hurry down the stairs excited to drive my car to the coin car wash where all the cool cars go on days like this. “Mom!! I’ve decided that I’ll be going to the coin car wash instead!”, I exclaimed. “Honey that car wash is so far from our house.”, my mom watched me put my sneakers on in excitement. “It’s okay the drive is beautiful and I want my car to look nice for the meet!!”, my mom and dad looked at eachother and my mom agreed on letting me go. I could tell they’re only allowing me since I’m grown enough but if they really had a choice, they wouldn’t want me to shine a car at all.

I grab my car keys which are among many other keychains which I’ve collected over the years. As I step out the door, I right away admire the sun’s reflection on my car. Many would think of this vehicle as just your ordinary, daily car. But it’s a lot more than that. It’s my most prized possession and it took forever for me to save up enough for it. It’s electric blue color reflects my bubbly personality perfectly. Although it’s an older car, it drives like new. Stepping into my car, I get comfortable and step onto the clutch as I turn it on. My car sounds loud and I’ve invested some of my money into getting a nice exhaust system and intake which definitely paid off. I plug in the aux to blast my favourite tracks, and off I went.

I shifted through the gears as my hair was blowing back with the windows down. It takes about half an hour to get to the good coin car wash with quality products. The other ones around here are rip offs. I enjoy driving, I could do it all day. The view of the palm trees and the golden blue sky, and the feeling of the warm air with a touch of cool breeze was perfect.I was approaching the car wash when I noticed a bunch of other people and their cars parked up as well; Exactly what I thought. I knew there’d be cool cars here and that’s the best part. I pull up and parked my car into one of the slots. From the corner of my eye, I noticed one of the boys staring at me and my car. He was standing beside a lowered, glossy black vehicle which looked amazing. As I turn my car off and step out, I gather the few bucks I had in my pockets for the wash.

I start spraying my car in water. From being a detailer in my past job, I learnt that you should always start by rinsing the vehicle and all unwanted particles with water before you get into the soap. “That your ride?”, says the boy who was looking at me earlier. “Yup. 6 speed.”, I replied indicating that my car has 6 gears as opposed to the regular 5. “Pretty clean. I was surprised when I saw a girl driving.”, of course he would say that, I rolled my eyes. “Girls can love cars too you know.” I continued to drench my car, and soon began to spray the thick blue soap all over. The boy grinned, “so, do you live around here?”, “About 30 minutes away from this place, close to Ordena road.”, “Ohh I live around there too. What’s your name?”, he continues to ask questions disregarding the fact that we’re complete strangers to each other. “My name’s Aliyah, what about you?”, I gave him a small smile. Getting a better look, he’s pretty attractive. But, I can’t have any distractions in my life just yet and I could tell he’s the type to cause trouble. “My name’s Austin, it’s nice to meet you.” He watches me wash all the soap off thoroughly. “Are you going to the meet today too?”, I take the initiative to continue the conversation. “Yeah, it starts soon. Wanna cruise together?”, as he said that I felt fuzzy inside. “Uhm yeah why not. Let me dry up my car and let’s head out.”, I begin to spiral a cloth around the panels of my car, absorbing all the water.

We both step into our own cars and as he starts his, I admired the sound. Both of us turning the left, we sped up to the lights ready to go. The day was better than ever and now I finally have a friend to come with me to car meets. Both of our windows were down and we were both blasting music of different types, his bass is crazy. I grin as I sped up ahead of him, trying to show off and have some fun. Around these streets, there are barely any cops which is why hosting car meets and speeding is so much easier to do.

From afar, I could hear the music and I could see the groups of cars driving into the lot of the car meet. It’s the best feeling ever to see that view. I slowly pulled up, my new friend pulling up beside me. He sped up to a farther parking spot and I followed, parking side by side. We both stepped out at the same time. “Damn, your car is loud huh.”, he complimented. “What can I say, hard work pays off right?”, we both walked around, admiring the cars of different colors, different modifications. It’s crazy how much of a niche community we are. There’s teens my age, and adults all coming together to share the same passion, an underrated and misunderstood passion.

“So do you come to car meets often?”, asks Austin. Considering the weather always being nice here in Cali, I actually don’t come to meets too often, “Sadly no. I wish I wasn’t so busy with school and work….But that’s what pays for my car parts and my gas.”, Austin looks at me with sincere interest as I spoke; Often times nobody pays attention to me when I go on about cars, so this is new. “You’re a hard worker. I like that.”, I barely know this guy, but he seems so genuine. “What about you? Do you work?”, Austin smiled when I asked that. “Honestly, I’ve been fortunate enough to never having the burden to work.”, when he says that, it’s almost humbling yet sparked curiosity within me. He’s not bragging about where his money comes from, but I want to know. “So, how do you afford your beautiful car then? Let me guess, you’re probably one of those kids that are sponsored by mommy and daddy.”, as I said that, I sounded as if I was envious, but I really wasn’t. “Well, since I’ve loved cars and racing my whole life, I got into some business doing what I love and it gets me around a grand every week.”, as we stroll through admiring the cars and talking, I was more and more engaged in our conversation. “Wait, so you’re like a mechanic or something?”, Austin smiled as I said that. A funny smile that wore an expression that I couldn’t place a finger on. “You’ll have to find out later.”, he left me curious but the way he speaks makes it convincing that he’s probably involved in something way bigger than just being a mechanic. “On a real note though, tell me more about yourself.”, he continued to speak. “Well, I’m 18 and I’ll be going to college in September for my law undergrad. On top of that, I love cars and play a little guitar too….What about you?”, “I’m 18 as well, and honestly, I’m just your average teenage boy who’s getting by. I’ll be graduating top in my class but I’m not sure if I’ll be going to college.”, as Austin says that, he looked at me in a way that was reflective of his fear of my judgement when he said that. Surprisingly, I was kind of relieved I found someone who’s a little different than your average college student. “So what are your plans for your future then?”, “Well, with however much I’ve been earning since I’ve been 16, I want to open up my own shop. You know, for all the cars that need a little bit of work. I guess you can say, I’m a future businessman. Since my father owns a bit of a franchise himself, he can mentor me a little I guess.”, Austin spoke with optimism and although his dreams sound big, a huge part of me believed in him. Just the way he spoke, his confident demeanor. “Well, I’m glad you know what you wanna do.”, we continued to walk around in silence.

The sun was still sitting pretty and the day was still young. “Well, I’ve got to get going. I gotta catch up on homework and you know, just make sure I’m home on time.”, I say. Austin laughed. “You have a curfew?”, he teased. “Uh yeah I do, and I don’t wanna get in trouble.”, I sounded like a little goody two shoes. “Okay okay car girl. When will I see you again?”, I smiled. I held my hand out indicating Austin to give me his phone, so I could give him my number. It was nothing flirty, but just a friendly gesture because I really needed some car friends. Austin gave me a friendly smile. “Wellllll I guess I’ll see you around some other time, it was nice meeting you.”, he sounded formal and said goodbye.

I stepped into my car and drove off, into the rest of the day. It was almost evening time and I know my mom would want me home for dinner later. The air was still warm and the breeze was still a little cool. As I drove, I couldn’t help but to think about the future. For someone who’s so young, I have this constant anxiety. I fear what’s in store for me. Will I be happy? Will I be successful? I also thought about Austin a little, someone whom I’ve met for the first time today, yet I wouldn’t mind hanging out with more. I turn into my neighborhood and downshift to first gear before I park my car onto the driveway.

I step into my house to see both my parents sitting in the living room. “Aliyah your mom cooked pasta, go change and have some dinner with us.”, my dad said as I entered. I ran upstairs to change when I felt my phone vibrate. It was Austin. “Heyyyy, you down to make some money tonight?”, that message was really random and seemed fishy. “Umm, how??”, “Bring your car, meet at crew st. at 12 tonight. You won’t regret it.”, when I read that message, there’s no way I could leave the house that late. I didn’t want to be lame though, especially because I just met him and he seems so cool. ��Uhh sure, okay I’ll be there.” I’ll have to find a way to sneak out then. I have to prove to Austin that I’m not some goody two shoes.

After dinner and spending some family time, I wait until both my parents head upstairs for bed. I needed to come up with a plan to sneak out without them hearing; Afterall, this is my first time doing all of this. I remember watching a movie where a kid oiled his door hinges to prevent squeaking, and I think I might have to do that. I wandered in the kitchen looking for some oil and used a spoon. How in the world can I do this without making a mess? I walk over to the side door of our house, and begin to pour some of the oil from the spoon onto the hinges. I’m pretty sure there are way smarter ways to be doing this, but it’s better than nothing. “Aliyah!! Get to bed. It’s getting late.” I almost jumped when my mom exclaimed that from the top of the stairs, it caught me off guard and my heart dropped at the thought of her catching my little scheme trying to sneak out. “Yes mom!! I’ll be up soon.”, I thought about anything else that might need to be done before I get to my room and wait for them to fall asleep. I should be fine to be honest.

I brush my teeth and cleanse my skin before “bed” and wait for my parents to fall asleep. It’s a quarter to 11 and they’re usually knocked out by 11:30 which gives me the perfect time to sneak out and make it to crew st in time to see what Austin was talking about. As I lay in bed and think, I realize that crew st. is actually really deserted and empty. Is Austin trying to kidnap me or something? My gut trusts him and I’m curious as to how he makes money. Around Crew st. there’s no cars, no stores, no houses, no schools, no nothing. It’s just an empty and dark street that everyone avoids just cause it goes nowhere, so it’s suspicious of Austin to want me to meet him there. Before I know it, it’s 11:30 and I was ready to sneak out. I keep my face bare and natural, and slip into my black ripped jeans and one of my crew neck shirts.

My heart is racing as I carefully and quietly open my room door. Before I proceed to tip-toe through the hallway, I make sure my parent’s room light is off; That usually means that they are asleep. I remember my friends telling me to always keep socks on when I sneak out to avoid making any sound from my feet. That idea was clever and actually worked. My palms were sweating as I was light on my feet. And at this moment, the worst thing happened. MY PHONE VIBRATES. The house is so quiet that the vibration of my phone could awake everybody. My eyes open wide and I grab my phone and turn off the vibration setting. This is the worst anxiety ever. I’m going to get in so much trouble. I stay still after the vibration to see if I hear any of my parents get up. So far, the coast is clear and I continue to make my way down the stairs. I slide into my sneakers and make my way out the side door. Oh my god. I made it. I have a bit of an adrenaline rush and I feel rebellious but a part of me loves this feeling. I go on my phone to see where that vibration came from. It was a message from Austin that read, “Hey you comin?”, I replied, “On my way now!” The night felt young and it felt as though I had all this time to myself.

As I step into my car I remember how loud my exhaust is. Oh god, my parents would definitely wake up if they hear me start my car. I begin to think. There has to be a way for me to leave. I put my keys in, and instead of fully starting my car, I allow my car to stay in neutral and I step out and begin to push it off my driveway, so at least the sound doesn’t go directly to my parents’ window. This is so clever. I grunt a little as I push my car off, and hop into the front seat. I start my car, clutch into first gear and drive off into the night. My parents would’ve called by now if they realized I’m out, so the fact that they didn’t means I should be safe.

I drive for about 25 minutes until I turn into crew st. and continue to drive until I find Austin. From afar, I could hear the sound of cars and people and I could see a few dozen cars parked along the side of the road. What’s going on here? As I drive closer, I see Austin with a bunch of his friends. He waves as I park beside him and has a smile on his face. “Your here!!!” I smiled back and looked around. This was like a real life fast and furious. The road was closed off and people are coming together to race one another for money and pink slips. My mom always warned me about street racing, and I didn’t know it was that serious until tonight. “So this is how you make your money huh?” I look onto the road infront of me where there are two cars behind a spray painted white line ready to race. Everyone cheering and mesmerized by the strength of these cars and how they push through the street. I could see people handing piles of cash to one another after each race. Faces of disappointment, faces of pride and faces of adrenaline junkies just like me. “You’re racing tonight you know that right?”, Austin looked at me and he seemed serious. “Hahahah no way! You’re crazy.”, I looked around as I witness pairs of drivers at a time lining up to race and to compete. Each driver going the speed of the full odometer until one of them wins. This is crazy but I love it.

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remembermemorablememories · 5 years

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Tuesday, February 26, 2019

post #414

main points:

- ultrasound

- wawa for lunch

- packing camera and gear

- issues with external drives (almost thought i lost everything/corrupted)

- dad’s birthday dinner!!

- drive to newark hotel

today i:

- woke up at 9am to my alarm. dad left me a luggage suitcase lock. i got out of bed and went straight to the radiology place in the hospital. i searched the car before i left and found my keys that i was looking for last night. it was in a weird position in the back seat, almost falling through the seats into the trunk (it was a crv with open trunk). i was like ?? but glad i found it

i put in the address and drove there. but then realized that there was another similar address but in a different town. i quickly drove there (fortunately it was only 10 minutes away) and then ran inside, calling ahead to tell them i’d be a bit late

i got there around 10:10am for a 10am appointment. first i was briefly checked in and updated my primary number to my home phone since i’ll be abroad/unable to take calls. i was shown in around 10:20am and a woman took an ultrasound of my abdomen. it was a lot of “deep breath and hold it” on all sides, then she sent it to a radiologist and i was out of there. very easy and simple, and my doctor will get results of it tomorrow

- picked up wawa on the way home. got mom a bbq cheesesteak and myself a bacon avocado sandwich + mac and cheese chicken fingers

started watching bob’s burgers but mom came down and we chatted a bit, she was talking about some of her meetings and how they were going

- started packing up all of my camera gear (gorilla pod, drone), organizing liquids in a plastic bag, getting shoes, swimming trunks, all the leftover stuff. i decided to set up my new external hard drive i ordered and i had to update NTFS for mojave i’m guessing cause a bunch of prompts showed up

then i tried to copy christmas 2018 photos from california to my old seagate hard drive and it wasn’t working cause it was only on read-only. i thought this was weird and tried using NTFS paragon on seagate instead of WD. but then... it crashed... or at least was taking a while. and suddenly i couldn’t access my seagate hard drive... i was low key freaking out cause it had stuff from the past four years of college

i tried plugging it on my PC and that didn’t work either... so then i tried back on my computer and saw an option to “verify” it. it ran for maybe 20-30 minutes and suddenly it was fixed. i was watching the detailed logs say it was verifying files and folders. i looked into it and apparently there’s a “dirty” bit set for NTFS drives if they’re corrupted. the verifier “chksum” or something like that is the only thing that can set it back. thank god it fixed itself

- took a long shower. shaved, replaced bandaid on dog bite. moved stuff out of our grandparents room to my room, packed up all my remaining stuff (finding swim trunks) and then i was all set to go :D

- dad got back from work around 5pm, and then sheena got back from rehearsal around 5:30pm with a fruit cheesecake for dad’s birthday!! yay :) mom had gone out to go swimming around 4pm but also got back around 6pm and then we went to a nearby steakhouse that we’ve been trying to go to for dinner the past few weekends. they had a bit of a wait (even after i put my name down on the waitlist over the phone) but eventually we got seated

it was a decent meal, got a caesar salad, chicken roll appetizers, and a filet main dish with cauliflower. but i think the chef might’ve screwed up cause mom and i both got medium and dad got medium rare. but mom got medium rare, and dad and i got what looked like well done.... rip....

while we were eating we also talked with sheena a bit about her game plan with the SAT cause she wants to take it earlier and get it out of the way in june but we strongly suggested taking it later in august so she could have more quality time to study and also take care of her mental health/not stress herself out so much

- came back home and ate the fruit cheesecake and sang dad happy birthday!! :) it was very wholesome. i took some videos from dinner and the cake and sent it to the fam

- around 9pm, i got my stuff (all ready) and said good bye to mom and sheena. then dad and i drove to the hotel near newark. on the car ride dad told me about the back story of how he met owen’s dad (through rooming in college at san marcos), currency value/printing money, and some other stuff. i drove us there so that dad didn’t have to drive all the way (just the trip back)

- checked in around 10:30pm, and said good bye to dad and wished him a happy birthday. then chilled in my hotel room watching the end of now you see me 2 on FX, while typing yesterday’s blog post and today’s

it’s 11:57pm. i need to wake up at 5am tomorrow. yikes. early flight at 7:30am yay :upside down smile:

i’m still not sure what i’m gonna do in regards to daily blogging while traveling. because i feel like i’m gonna be really tired to do it at the end of the day every night... but i guess we’ll see. maybe i’ll do highlights. but i’ll also be recording/vlogging so like... do i need to blog really? but it’s also nice to have the big overview. argh idk. i have also been thinking about stopping this for a while now. it’s getting to be a lot. maybe just more condensed thoughts instead of so detailed the way i do now?

anywho, i’m gonna go to sleep

#post #february #2019 #normal #reflection #family

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remembermemorablememories · 5 years

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Friday, February 1, 2019

post #389

main points:

- went for another blood test (second one)

- long shower

- started watching netflix’s show “explained” and leftover hoagie for lunch

- learned wii fit trainer for smash

- played smash online for... 4 hours

- packing for chicago/seattle

- dinner with the fam at e. buffet without sheena :’(

- fortnite with bryan/josh (attempted but servers down)

- smash doubles with sheena

today i:

- woke up at 7:45 ish when my dad woke me up. i had my alarm set for 8am

i quickly got out of bed, grabbed my blood test papers and then took the car to leave. i needed to go asap cause my mom needed the car to drive to work

- went to the lab and waited for about 10 minutes after checking in. then got called in by the same woman who took my blood last time. her assistant wasn’t there this time though. i asked her to do it on my right arm this time cause i think my left arm is still recovering. this time she didn’t have to wiggle it around, it was a quick in and out and done drawing blood within 30 seconds

- drove back home and got back around 9am. my mom took the car and drove out to work. then i chilled for a while, watching some youtube videos. daniela andrade made a new song!!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h7fl5ATu5vw

- took a long shower from 9:30-10:30am

- started my laundry so that i could pack it for later tonight

- i called BU to figure out my student account inquiry cause they were still charging me for an apartment plan even though i graduated. the person on the phone said the payment will be cleared by 5pm today so i was like oh okay cool

- went downstairs to eat lunch which was my leftover chicken salad hoagie and fries. and then i browsed netflix and found a show called “explained”, which was a collab with vox. i forgot i wanted to watch this from a while back. i watched the first episode on music, which was super cool to learn and watch. i love it it’s like vox videos but 5 times longer. they’re usually 4-5 minutes but each episode is 20 minutes

- around 1pm i decided to try to learn a new character so i just randomly picked... wii fit trainer. i watched tkbreezy’s video on it at 1.5x speed. it was 38 minutes long and i spent like 25 minutes watching it/practicing in training mode

then i played online and got wii fit trainer to elite smash. then i was like... hmm i guess i’ll try to get ike into elite smash. then that worked pretty quickly. i got lucky i think. cause i got matched up against relatively bad/okay ish players so even though i didn’t practice ike, i was doing okay. then i was like... i guess i’ll try dedede. then got him into elite smash. learning dedede was very weird. also got lucky cause i wasn’t playing that well honestly. but the other players weren’t too great either and i got through and won. he has such a weird style of gameplay. then got inkling into elite smash. that was not too bad cause i played him before on the alt acc to elite smash. also i played against this really good ness, it was super fun. we kept saying “well played.” “good fight!” and other friendly taunts. elite smash cutoff right now is like 3.5mil GSP and most of the characters i have started around 3.2mil GSP

- started packing around 5pm. it was snowing all afternoon so i was gonna go outside to shovel some snow (it was like an inch maybe?) but dad came home around 4:30pm and created some basic paths. so i was like oh okay i’ll just go pack then

packed up all my clothes, drone and camera stuff

- went upstairs and wasn’t sure what to do so i tried to play falco to get him to elite smash. falco is... so weird compared to smash 4. he’s completely changed and i kind of don’t really like it. his jump is so sensitive, i can’t short hop consistently. also his moves feel so different from smash 4 >:( i played from 6-7pm. around 6:50pm i got kind of sick of playing so much smash today and was gonna take a break and watch another episode of explained, but mom came home so we were like okay dinner time

- we were gonna go to a steakhouse near us for dinner. sheena stayed after school for rehearsal and went to eat dinner with her friends. when we got to the steakhouse, the wait was 45 minutes.. so we were like, i guess we could just go to e. buffet, so we went there instead :p i ate more fried foods this time cause i was feeling more americanized food. like chicken fingers, fries, etc. nice filling meal

- got back home, took a shower and cut my nails

- i hopped on discord to play fortnite with bryan and josh around 9:30pm. chris also joined too. but then we tried to start the game and they said the servers were down for emergency maintenance... rip. we tried to play survive.io but it was only 50v50 and no squads :o

i started typing up this blog post while chatting on discord. we were just trying to figure out what other games to play. sheena just came back around 10pm and we’re gonna play some smash doubles and then i’m gonna go to sleep

gotta wake up at 7am tomorrow morning!

it’s 10:36pm and sheena’s playing solos right now with zelda but i’m gonna join her in doubles

also health update: had bowel movement in the morning and one at night. both times small ish stools but at least no watery stuff. but when i wipe there’s some watery-ness to it :o idk what that means

okay the end. trip begins tomorrow!

#post #normal #february #2019 #health

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