#it'll be so good to be next to friends

[dykefever]

went to this queer butch event thing last night and it was so fun and when i tell you. there were so many butches there and the theme was suits so they were wearing SUITS! well. it was great fun... i have been added to this big group chat where people post loads of events n stuff ... so cool...

#was so nervous 2 go but i was so brave about it and i got a few people's instagrams and we're gonna go to the next one and stuff :-) #met someone i'd served at work before and i was like so sorry i remember you because you were queer and with another butch lady and she was #like that's so valid. #anywayyy forced myself to do this thing make more queer friends and i think it'll be good... #laura says some things

[lesamis]

i learned the grade for my phd thesis today (it's v good! i'm v happy!) & my supervisor took that as occasion to sit down with me and talk about The Future for a bit, and she clearly cares and i'm thankful for her, but the sheer ivory tower out-of-touch-ness of academics will never stop baffling me. like they'll ask you about your new job (admin & public service), and you tell them you're enjoying it and loving all the mental space it's freed up, and they'll be like cool! but you are looking for something better, right?

and it's like. no. i'm really super not. i understand that professors look down on this kind of work, which is one thing, they're snobs, i can't change that. but to not take someone's word for it when they say they find their job fulfilling and rewarding is kind of. ungenerous? not to mention condescending? like please don't call a less mentally taxing job a "waste of potential" when it was working in academia that stopped me from producing literally any writing i cared about or felt proud of for nearly four years

#if there IS any potential still to be reached i'm not reaching it in limited contracts worrying about whether i'll have a job next year lol #anyway i'm here to say if you're on the fence about whether to stay in academia. #do not do it. it really doesn't get easier from here on out in fact it'll probably get harder #and i know it feels good to be encouraged. and you want to do right by people who have faith in you. but god #i'm so tired of wealthy tenured profs who have 2 years to retirement thinking they can give advice without understanding our realities #ma'am no one is funding the humanities anymore. ma'am my friend recently applied for a postdoc position with 200+ applicants. ma'am

[secrettastemakerland]

there is nothing depressing than rewatching bridgerton season 2 and watch as every time, without fail, peneloise breaks up

#everyone knows there's nothing more heartbreaking than a friend break up #now next season pen will be alone and el is stuck faking with cressida #i know everyone was expecting me to say polin break up but they needed to fight!! #so she could see him as human and he could realize how much she means to him!!! #but peneloise? oh they didn't deserve this your honor #(i'm sure it'll be good for them as well but still) #(and that doesn't mean i can't and won't be sad about it!!!) #bridgerton #penelope featherington #eloise bridgerton #peneloise

[forcedhesitation]

unique greetings?? hello??

the romance-specific greeting only seemed to trigger once I entered act 3, despite jantar having gone through the dance cutscene fairly early into act 2.

the regular high friendship one is a greeting I've gotten before in corydalis' save, as well as "always good to talk, my friend," but both lines of dialogue randomly disappeared at some point, and wyll only greeted corydalis with "well met." well, up until today, I guess.

I have to wonder if these will once again randomly disappear because they are clearly bugged and larian just won't fix them once and for all...

...please...stop doing this to the gate's most beautiful little prince...

#bg3 #thoughts about media #wyll ravengard #has wyll always had a romance specific greeting and no one knew because it's been bugged this whole time??? #I wonder if he has more than one actually... #because on corydalis' save- the only greeting I was able to trigger was the “let's talk” greeting. #and I know for a fact that max friendship wyll can greet you with “always good to talk my friend.” #so I wonder if there is another greeting besides “I'm here for you. always.” #star has many different ones depending on how much he likes your tav/where you are in his romance. #he and SH have a ridiculous amount of material compared to everyone else though...so not really a useful frame of reference. #halsin has...two? maybe three? if I'm remembering correctly? #but I'm not certain of how many unique voicelines other companions have for romance specific greetings. #I've only ever romanced star halsin and wyll. and this wyll line never played for me b4 today. #I'm working on gale next so I can complete my collection of boyfriends but it'll take ~30 hrs to get to the kissing. #maybe even faster since this will be the millionth time I through act 1. but still a sizeable amount of time. unfortunately for my patience

[mildmayfoxe]

hahaha hey you guys guess what. you'll never believe it. got the guy who's in charge of my fraud case on the phone and he was like "who'd you give one-time security codes to yesterday" and i was like "the guy who called me from the fraud department after they noticed a weird login in florida??" and he was like "that was the fuckin hacker. you got got. IDIOT!!!!!!!!!!" i handed my entire savings over to a fucking guy on the phone on a silver platter. like some kind of fuckin rube. bro

#IT IS OK THOUGH I HAVE BEEN SORTING IT OUT #account is LOCKED DOWN! card is DELETED! fraud paperwork has been FILED! i have requested a fraud alert AND credit freeze #from the NATIONAL CREDIT BUREAU! #a friend of mine is taking me to MAINE next saturday to go to the BANK! i sent an email to my landlord asking if i can pay rent by CHECK! #i went to my other bank and deposited my BONDS! so i have some MONEY! to pay RENT! #i also got a new debit card from them. and made sure i could use my old checks. #i also bought some STAMPS while i was out and a BIRTHDAY PRESENT for a FRIEND #now i am going to start switching over some auto deposits #so when i get my paycheck on tuesday i will actually get it. #i feel so STUPID but i think i have done all i can to fix this. i am feeling better about it #by next weekend i will have my money again. it's all fine #and hopefully next time i will not get got so easily. lol. #anyway dont get got by people pretending to be your bank i guess. i did think it was weird how many questions they asked but.. #they ALWAYS ask lots of questions at the bank!!!!! #i got a text message FROM the bank saying they would be calling me soon and then the next call was from the scammer #and then like a half hour later got one from the bank and was confused bc they'd just 'called me' #anyway. it'll be fine. scary for a while but at least i have things i can do to make it better. it's all good #genuinely feeling like i ought to take out like a thousand bucks cash and keep it in my desk to replace my bonds tho tbh hahah #just in case something like this happens again. you never know. what would i have done if i DIDNT have those yknow #ok thank u all for being along on this journey with me

[cathalbravecog]

Some screencaps from TTCC Pride 2023 :3

Except without people's chat messages because they gave me an actual headache (But also thank you everyone who hung out with me there even if I needed to escape the masses later)

Cogs Only Club Moment BTW

#ttr was a bit more chill...ttcc is more about shipping and advertising their twitters it gave me a headache :skull: #but still ttcc is my main domain here and i had a lot of fun here #was a bit easier to meet up with my friends here!! it was fun. sad i couldnt do a last legit high roller today but... #we did a roleplay joke one so we good LOL #again tysm everyone who chilled at the pizza bc i knew a bunch of ppl there were from tumblr and i recognized em :] #kinda had to escape the Evils Of The Masses because It's Too Many People For My Brain To Handle #hope if there's a pride next time it'll be cool as well!! events like this don't happen a lot in toontown. #toontown #toontown corporate clash #game screenshots

[choco-dawn]

fhdskjfhds you know what fuck it. honestly, i havent really been drawing much stuff besides D&D things. i know most people wont care but. might as well post some here just to post SOMETHING. sorry y'all. i love my D&D characters alot.

#d&d 5e #Dnd #d&d art #dungeons and dragons #uh #idk what else to put #MochArt #sorry again honestly hfdskjfh #i know no one really cares but whatever #next time i draw it'll be for artfight BUT AFTER THAT #maybe some mario stuff #the recent direct......so good (for me) #i cant wait to play wonder and the SMRPG remake #anyway whoopsie ranting in the tags again #speaking of artfight follow me :3 #https://artfight.net/~Caffe_Mocha #also some of the art here is old so one of my friends characters design wasnt made yet so thats why they look different from time to time #theres some drawings of npcs in here too mostly from the campaign with Mari #also i guess i should a few (like 2?) whiteboard doodles have my friends art in there. thank you moshi ily #okay. anyway bye for real augfdshf sorry #okay wow im just now realizing how much stuff this is. #uh.........i hope you.....enjoy...?

[filthyjanuary]

feeling sad :(

#sorry this is such a dumb thing to be sad about im a grown ass adult but like two thirds of the people i invited to my birthday #either cant come or said they would then bailed and like #some of them have legit reasons but some of them i'm kind of like :/ ok well i put in so much effort for yall would be really nice #if a crumb of that was reciprocated #idk i dont ask for much on my birthday i just want to have a nice dinner with my friends #and i have friends who like throw the biggest tantrum fusses about their birthdays and make it this entire spectacle #and people still humour them so it's kind of like #idk #do i really suck that bad that you cant make a saturday evening work to like eat good food #idk maybe next year i just wont plan anything #and everyone'll be like BUT SIMA IT'S THE BIG ONE and i'll be like well! i wish it werent! #bc it'll suck even more to have people not come lmao i dont actually think i've ever had a milestone birthday people just dont give a shit #this includes my parents idk like they are nice to me on my birthday but like no birthday was ever like hashtag special #and like the holidays already sucked so bad this year they did not feel like the holidays half the people i got presents for #didnt get me anything which is like fine i dont give presents to get them back but it kind of sucks to not even get a card? a thank you??? #idk this is so stupid i am turning 29 i pay taxes this should not be a big deal #maybe it's bc i feel like half my 20s were pandemic years so it kind of sucks that theyre basically over and idk im just feeling sad and ol #and lonely and just kind of shitty and unlikeable #AND IT'S DUMBBBBB TODAY WAS A GOOD DAY I PASSED MY DRIVING TEST IDK WHY I'M CRYING FUCK MY STUPID BAKA LIFE

[sylphwing]

decided to try and get shiny litten after all bc ricotta is too cute not to get... i rlly do hope this one's short tho bc the cutscene is way longer than in omega ruby like i'm only on 280 resets and it's been like 3 days 🧍

#sylph.txt #shiny hunting #conifer is also a grovyle now and he looks sooo good #genuinely sad to evolve him bc the red is so nice looking #i will not b able to do the pkmn y chespin hunt i wanted to do next bc it'll just b way too long sadly :( #my friend says to just hatch eggs but i want to have them w me the whole time...

[theirloveisgross]

.

#Decluttered my room a bit #Gotta work a full shift tomorrow before continuing with the living room and actually cleaning the floors and shit #And then a concert lol #Why do I do everything last minute #Anyway... She'll be annoyed #I know it but like... When depression hits its so hard to do anything #It's not that bad... I just keep a lot of stuff #Whatever. It'll be nice to pay half rent next month #Excited for the show tomorrow #Local boy who opened for sun room 2 years ago #He's so good #His name is 'young friend' #Okay... I'm sleeping now #I'll dream with Zaynie singing right now because I have the audio to support my dreams thankssssss

[demidin]

you ask me if I'm okay and I just give the fucking saddest look before running to you and tryna hug you only to realize you're a tumblr mutual and not an irl homie and I still try to fucking hug you because dammit I'm not at my best I need help

#demi's dings 🎇 #in other words #im going through the worse age of my life rn #i got beaten up for not doing algebra right and now my gut hurts #my friends are being dicks #now legit all my discord friends are gone #and i won't have anyone to talk to next year #i can't anymore #i can't do this #god i just wanna die and wonder if it'll even make my family miss me because they act like i'm a disease for making them look bad #i can't do anything that makes me somebody #i go through having a god complex and being the most pathetic wet cat #im considering death my dad is literally calling me a piece of shit and treating me like an animal #he's considering fucking making me do algebra all day (and would even consider treating me so inhumanity doing it) #IM STILL A KID AND IM SORRY I STILL HAVE THE BRAIN OF ONE #IM SORRY IM NOT GOOD ENOUGH FOR YOU #YOU DONT NEED ME IF IM BRINGING SHAME TO YOU? IS THAT SO? #BITCH FINE I CAN JUST GO DISAPPEAR IM SORRY IM NOT A GOOD ENOUGH DAUGHTER TO YOU #vent post

[stereax]

woohoo spiraling out of control right now (what else is new really I've been fucked up and spiraling for weeks now) and trying to figure out reasons not to delete my tumblr and discord and myself along the way

but you know. talking about myself on my blog automatically means I'm attention seeking and fishing for pity right? should just shut up and stick to the news eh, it's all I'm good for :D

anyway if you need me I'll be in the corner reliving the past, coming to terms with reality, and trying to convince myself I'm not the problem despite every indication to the contrary ✌︎︎

#sterechats :) #09:58 pm - this is a bad idea but scheduling it anyway #what's the worst that can happen really? everyone leaves again? nobody talks to me again? #probably gonna delete this in the morning so. meh. not like it matters not like I matter :D #10:29 pm - wow it feels like my head is on fire #like my brain is actually burning and I can't do a damn thing about it #I should be happy right now! the devils are winning! my favorite guys are scoring! #but no! I'm barely keeping it together around my family and praying I don't wake up tomorrow <3 #11:00 pm - I need to get out of here #I need to get out of here out of here out of here I can't stay here any more this is killing me #everyone hates me and I need to chew my arms open maybe then everything will make sense #why am I even writing these tags what does it matter #I was so much more in control of myself when I was sh-ing #maybe I should get back to that maybe it'll help I don't know anymore #I just want my friends back but they hate me hahahaha #11:24 pm - wonder how many people are gonna block me after this one #how many people will finally be fed up and leave for good #everyone leaves and I should be used to this by now #here's a truck stop instead of saint peter's (yeah yeah yeah yeah) #11:41 pm - it's friday afternoon/there goes antigone to be buried alive #in the next world I want to be something useful/like a staple gun/or in love #I would fall off a cliff for you/a thousand times and call it a good day #maybe I'm just incapable of being human! maybe that's it! #maybe I'm not even human at all... but something worse instead... #1:22 am - moving the posting of this back from 3 to 6 am #not that that matters and not that I matter but I don't think I'll sleep #and I don't want this to post when I'm awake #I know I'm just going to get unfollowed and blocked and left behind as always #because happiness and good things and friendships just aren't things I get to have really #I just wish people would stop lying and telling me they're different and they'll stay when they're not different and won't stay

[astrxealis]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME & @noxtivagus WOOOOO !!!!!!!!!! 🥺🥰😙💗💖🤍

#⋯ ꒰ა starry thoughts ໒꒱ *·˚ #okay today (30 minutes of it) has been fun so far. it was weird being so ... normal abt my bday! like! kinda numb! #but then my friends make me so happy that i feel myself again and idk this is a good bday after all i hope <33 #WHAHDJSB BIT SHY TO JUST SAY IT HERE BUT HONESTLY IT'S NOTHING I JUST LIKE SAYING HBD TO MYSELF EVERYWHERE LIKE WOOO YES IT'S MY BDAY #hope today and the coming year is good ^_^ mispelled good as food at first but hey that's food too! #good. i mean. aha. #SNIFFS I'M TALKING MORE AGAIN W MY BEST FRIEND AND FINALLY TALKED AGAIN W MY OTHER CLOSE FRIEND AND THEN I WANT TO TALK MORE AGAIN WITH MY #OTHER BEST FRIEND AND MY OTHER CLOSE FRIEND btw the distinctions between close/best friend here is basically if it's been Confirmed #but otherwise. <3 #i missed my friends guys. and i've also made a lot more really nice friends. and i also miss my other friends. #i've felt most myself than i have in months (maybe even years! yeah. years) so idk this year is going to be dang Good #lots of stuff i wna say to myself ere but it'll just be in my head and i'll try my best and whatnot and yeah :] <333 #next year is going to be scary af tho. oh my god.

[supercantaloupe]

christ i'm finally home. thank gd

#sasha speaks #i wanna talk about me #rehearsal in the morning #then i discovered that my phone is. broken. very distressingly so #the back is popping off because the battery is bulging. very Not Good #so i had to make an unplanned visit to the phone store... #spent like thirty very stressful minutes on call with phone insurance to file a claim. #good news is they're sending me a replacement and it'll be here monday #so i don't have to scramble being phoneless for very long. and i'll definitely have it ready for spain next weekend #which is really the important thing...i need my phone to travel sorry #but gd. i'm wiped #i haven't had much to eat today i've just been going nonstop since close to 8 #well i have an iced chai and a pastry now. and i'm chillin. #all my roommates and a bunch of their friends are out at pride rn #it was pretty neat seeing so many people out on the metro and around the city all decked out for pride today tbh #lots of colors and hair/face paint and funky outfits #i would go if i wasn't so tired. and bad with crowds #but. gah. enough excitement for one day i just want to sit in front of a screen for a bit... #shoutout to my 6'1 skinny straight white man roommate tho and his mustache he dyed rainbow for pride tho

[elytrafemme]

okay i think i will be sleeping soon now. tomorrow morning is going to be intense and maybe a little stressful but i get to talk about my research to other people which is usually fun. and then i have nothing else the rest of that day except doing work which is like obvious so... that’s pretty cool. day at a time! <3 much love

#nightmare.personal #started catastrophizing about something going on next thursday... i have time before then though like it'll be okay haha #the pros of tomorrow (talk to friends. talk about project. morning person enabling) far outweigh any cons (anxiety) #think i'm feeling the late night doom which sucks bc it seriously is like a knife in the chest but #things are good and i am good and people are good #and i just have to put faith that things are going to be good and if they're not. then they will be again #ive made it through every hiatus of happiness and i am already happy right now so i will just keep going up that hill #we're gonna make it. i guess that's the point here #for now though i sleep and try to shut off my mind