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#it’s not good
cjoat-boost · 30 days
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March 4, 2024 Edit of this still relevant post from February 27, 2024
For those that view any of my online presences (including my blogs)…Um, this is something for you to know.
Please save this post so it doesn’t get buried by queue.
My& Current Health Situation
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I wish to communicate this to y’all now so that…I don’t end up worrying anyone when this happens. It may have been noticeable by some folks that I’m dragging, heavily. I’m not having a good time right now with my body. With this comes with an onion of issues detailing certain aspects of what I’m going through.
I know I have a lot of obligations. Not only as a creative and content creator; but as a friend, a mentor, Guardian or even older peer, and myself. I’ve neglected myself for too long. I have been noticing my vitality decrease; and my CFS and POTS flaring up further.
Social Justice is something I’m always perceiving and sensitive to; and as such, the strain I’ve noticed too late has been worsening. Includes many emotional meltdowns and outbursts from me that I can no longer control or hold back.
Trying to figure out how to exactly sort through the mass tangles of my traumatized emotional and mental state isn’t as simple as I hoped for me. While I’m creatively burned out, I am suffering Autistic burnout. A double whammy of all things.
I’m finding myself getting “stuck,” unable to physically move for hours at a time. I’d move upstairs to eat something but end up being there for what’s normally an half hour task…for nearly 2+ hours. Even so, trying to force movement to do tasks that is considered “everyone can do these” is mentally painful and physically locking. Even if I have to desperately use the bathroom when I’m about to fall asleep, my headmates (AKA alters) have to switch to co-front or “snatch me back” in order to get my body moving. That’s with the sudden rocket spike in heart rate and blood pressure, and loss of balance (at the very least).
I’m already struggling to cope with many things due to the fact that I haven’t been able to draw much at all; or create anything and write anything. Especially trying desperately to fulfill my word on things I had the energy to do, but no longer do. So much of my struggles I can’t properly transmute. It’s so upsetting.
Thus, there’s going to be a sudden and abrupt shift in posting or messaging. I don’t know when. But it is coming.
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(Especially since I’ve been feeling mania over the weekend. All weekend, Saturday and Sunday, I manic cleaned large portions of certain areas I occupy as well as my housemate. Today I’m feeling the aching in my joints badly, with my calves swearing hell at me. I’m wearing my wrist brace too, I just…I’m rambling.)
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I wish for you to know what’s happening if you don’t see or hear from me, my headmates, or any of my online presences (as depicted here: https://cjoatbysamwise.com/cjoats-links ) No one is being forgotten. I’m not abandoning anyone. I’m not ghosting anyone. What I do know (still coming to terms with it ngl) is I need to stop, fully stop, and recover. It’s looking like my body is going to do that for me by force. It’s going to be abrupt and sudden to the inconvenience of many, including my housemate, unfortunately.
I don’t know how long this will last. But I don’t know how long I’ll be able to keep “hustling” like this. Does this sound repetitive? I wanted to communicate before suddenly I’m unable.
Does this sound repetitive? I’ll end it here. I wanted to communicate before suddenly I’m unable.
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I’ll end it here with how you can support me while I’m down, only able to and wish to (I’m aware financial situations are a big struggle at the moment, there is no pressure to.)
Provide support by these links:
Thank you for reading until the end; have an awesome week ahead. Please remember to hydrate and eat. 🫶🏽❤️‍🩹
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kays-artstuff · 1 year
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Katherine isn’t the happiest to see this development, but oh well what’s she gonna do?
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avesblues2 · 2 years
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Lol
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cinnamonrelated · 1 year
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youtube
Sooooo…this happened.
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ierofrnkk · 4 months
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he’s the only good part about this movie sorry not sorry
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I’ve said it already but I’ll say it again, the Soap is a traitor theory is not interesting nor would it ever be a good plot point
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lasagnaisoverrated · 2 months
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I firmly believe that mlp gen 5 is the tf rid15 of mlp fans
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skylitmelody · 1 month
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Just read a post where a lady was crying because her partner came out as trans and they both asked their kids not to call the “dad” anymore. A few weeks later the youngest child was wearing a shirt that said “I love my dad!” and the lady was sobbing because “my kids no longer have a father and I’ll never get to hear them call him ‘dad’”.
Like, fucking christ. Your partner is trans, not dead.
Worst part is all the comments saying it’s so hard to have a loved one transition and having to say goodbye to the life the two of you dreamed of having. That all the hopes and dreams are now washed away because they came out.
What vile shit.
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karaushi · 1 year
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«Maybe you're looking for this?»
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tweekytweaker · 3 months
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guys stop liking my old art. 🤬 it. SUCKS!!!!
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rowanthestrange · 4 months
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The Gang is ready
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bohemian-nights · 4 months
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what each team wanted: alicent and rhaenyra vengeful towards each other
what will we receive in the final episode of the second season: Alicent going to dragonstone to meet rhaenyra who knows the seven hells why? What will Alicent do there? apologize for aemond killing her son by accident? Is rhaenyra going to say that it was never her intention to kill her grandson? WTF!!!
This series is a joke, I thought the plot was between Rhaenyra and Aegon, the two main characters, not between Rhaenyra and her ex-friend who became her stepmother
I have hope that it’s better than it sounds, but the showrunners making this into the Women who were wronged by evil men show instead of the Two inept children of a lazy king who almost got their entire family killed in a civil war show really is a tragedy.
Alicent is an important character, but her relationship with Missy Anne should not be like this. Aegon was Missy Anne’s true rival, but they are wasting him to turn this into a “feminist” show.
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airsignz · 10 months
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menace-in-the-void · 2 years
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Anyone else feel like while they aren’t human their body is? Like, I, me, I’m not human. The closest approximation I have to who I am lies within lovecraftian horror and dark matter beyond known space. But my body? The thing I reside within? That’s human. It is human, and it lives and moves and exists as a human. So every decision I make regarding my body, from eating to clothing choices to medicinal decisions, I make knowing that it is human and perceived as human. Idk if anyone else feels this way, but it’s how I do.
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ugliestbimbo · 1 year
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I got writers block again yall, can’t write this mf to save my life. Everytime I try I keep projecting trauma onto him, can’t give this guy a moment of peace istg 😭😭😭 (Kalim, not Jamil. I mean Jamil too but not as bad, he just gets half-cucked)
Anyways read my smut 🔥🔥🔥 -> https://archiveofourown.org/works/45586828
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I finished reading Priest by Sierra Simone earlier today and I want to rant about this mediocre book. This book is a prime example of why "growing up Catholic" doesn't mean you're able to write an interesting story regarding Catholic characters or relay any accurate information about Catholicism nor does being a “former librarian” mean you’re going to be a competent writer. I’m already forgetting some details about the plot and characters so I’m making this post before I completely forget everything about it.
I read the prologue and it immediately foreshadowed the overwhelming blandness of the novel and its characters, with its poor prose and corny exposition with info that the reader was already going to learn throughout the book. If I was Simone's editor, I would have made her rewrite it entirely or scrap it outright. Creative writing classes should use this prologue as an example of what not to do in your introduction.
So the novel is written in first person perspective of Tyler Bell, a young Catholic priest. I don't buy for a second that this dude is actually a Catholic priest who went to seminary for several years and has served as a priest for three. His voice in the story feels entirely inauthentic and he's not a believable character. The author may have been a Catholic but I honestly don’t think she ever retained any understanding of Catholic priests, the priesthood and the experiences of priests or ever bothered to look into these things. A little bit of research in this area probably would have helped in creating a more believable, and likeable priest.
He meets and eventually falls in love with Poppy Danforth; a white woman born in immense privilege with a good education and (here's the kicker) she's a former dancer in a gentlemen’s club. She comes to Tyler within the first few chapters for counsel and she’s sultry, sexy and openly sexual so of course Tyler starts lusting after her. She feels like the stereotypical “worldly woman” that pastors warn men against and I don’t hate her but I don’t like her either.
Both Poppy and Tyler are bland, uninteresting and unlikable people so I honestly could care less about their relationship and whatever supposed love they had for each other. He leaves the priesthood for her and they get married, which is nice I guess.
I'm kinda tired of the male hard dom/female submissive dynamic you see in a lot of mainstream romance novels so a lot of the smut wasn't my cup of tea. I did, however, enjoy the blasphemy and sacrilege featured in a lot of the love scenes they had together admittedly.
I think Simone just wanted an excuse to write smut starring a priest from her former religion, and that's fine, but she barely managed to string together an interesting story or develop her characters all that well. This novel is forgettable but I suspect it could have been executed better with a more skilled writer.
I wasn't expecting a masterpiece of fine literature or an informative brochure on Catholicism but if my Catholic Church hating self is calling your bluff on your portrayal of Catholic characters, settings and beliefs, you have a serious problem. I enjoy some light reading from time to time where I don't have to think too deeply about the plot and characters but this book was only somewhat entertaining. I only finished reading it out of a stubborn refusal to let any book go unfinished.
Other noteworthy things:
The Bishop comes across as a bumbling fool and was sheepishly asking Tyler to go to a conference in the first act and.....I don't think Simone understands that priests have a vow of OBEDIENCE to their bishops. If Bishop Bove wanted Tyler to go to a religious conference, he would simply tell his subordinate to go and Tyler would have to go. The dynamic of a Bishop and a Priest is not one of equals, especially with how easily that relationship can turn extremely abusive and toxic.
Tyler claimed that the Liturgy of the Hours is almost obsolete and.......I don't think that's even REMOTELY true. It may be less common among laity but I wouldn’t say the Liturgy of the Hours is completely an absolete practice. It just feels a little baffling for a Catholic priest to make that claim.
Poppy's ex boyfriend leaks photos of her and Tyler together in the third act and Tyler (of course) becomes a famous internet hot priest meme and has a fanclub called the Tylerettes 🤮🤮🤮🤮. This fact damn near killed me with cringe.
Tyler does this thing in his narration where he’s oh-so-worried that his sexually dominant, aggressive way makes him a bad Feminist Ally and anytime he mentioned this, I could imagine the author nudging you, the reader, and smugly saying “See? He’s not a misogynist, he’s a Nice Guy!” It’s nauseating and it made me instantly dislike Tyler and nothing could ever redeem him after that.
In their first tryst together, Tyler makes her orgasm twice and she just gets up and leaves him in the church after their done with each other and I can’t stress enough that you should never do that to someone???? Like ever?????
At first there isn’t a lot of aftercare or discussions of boundaries, which really rubbed me the wrong way, especially since they engaged in impact play, degradation, face-fucking, some light somno and rather rough sex in general.
I’ve read better romantic and smutty stories regarding Catholic priests here on Tumblr and over on Archive of Our Own and Wattpad and a lot of those stories were written for free and on the writer’s spare time. If you enjoyed this book, that’s fair but I’ve read far superior works and I can’t get myself to really like Priest all that much, which is disappointing.
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