#it’s in my rules but just in case you haven’t gotten around to reading them or missed it!!!! <3

[the1laff]

WIP Post

Tagged by @jittyjames, thanks for the tag!

Rules: Post names of all the files in your WIP folder, regardless of how non-descriptive or ridiculous. Let people send you an ask with the title that intrigues them, then post a little snippet or tell them something about it! Tag as many people as you have WIPs.

I’ll try to tag as many as I have WIPs but idk if it’ll happen. Also if I tag you, you don’t have to do it, Idek if you write, sorry.

@binch-i-might-be @duelamort @cecescomposition @himnnnnnn @xcminhdang

Hamilton

Hellfire and Rhinestones

Jamilton fic, modern day, angst?

Thomas is a demon (more specifically the devils son but that’s not important till way later) and takes a liking to Alex so he starts showing up when he needs help, and then more frequently just bc. Alex doesn’t know Thomas is a demon yet. At one point he think he’s a guardian angel or some shit. I love irony.

That Little Noodle Fuck

Jamilton fic, modern day, fluff and some emotional comforting.

Adopted from parsniffs, 3AM Warmth. Alex is a college student who writes for a living and Thomas is also a college student who works at a late night cookie shop. Alex orders cookies way too often and before too long he realizes he actually has somewhat of a relationship with Thomas. Thomas is a caretaker at times for our poor Alex. I tried to keep them as close to how parsniffs wrote them.

You Won’t Die Alone!

Jamilton, modern day, fluff, angst, slow burn, one of those soulmate AUs where everyone has a black mark/stain from where their soulmate will touch them for the first time, once they touch it turns into bright colors.

This starts as a senior year HS fic and if it goes to plan then it will evolve in to a college fic. Alex thought he didn’t have a mark. He kinda likes Thomas at first then hates guts then eventually comes around and can be civil-ish and I haven’t gotten past there if I remember. There is snow at some point, drinking, drinking games, minor injury and pranks. He does end up in possession of a particular jacket. The rest of the gang makes intermittent appearances. Also Washingdad

“T” is for Trauma

Lams, modern day, established relationship, fluff, hurt/comfort.

John is a paramedic, Alex is a freelance writer. There are a lot of chapters centered around real calls I’ve been on, some are altered for reader enjoyment and to abide by HIPPA laws. I don’t use real addresses/names obviously. There is a lot of medical trauma, infant, child, adult, and animal death. Alex gardens, there will be a mental trauma reveal for John later, possible smut if I can get over the fear of posting that. I try to balance it with wholesome fluff and couple things in between. My longest and current favorite fic I’ve written.

Sherlock

Reading Too Far Into It

Johnlock, modern day, fluff, maybe some angst.

John discovered Ao3, and reads fic. I can’t say more without spoiling the entire plot. Pre slash if I remember correctly. Lots of Sherlock antics, there is a case I plan on throwing in at some point.

#ao3 writer #tag game #WIP #wip stuff #fic writing #jamilton #lams #johnlock

[theoriginalcharacterfoundfamily]

Hello hello! (Introduction, Rules, and FAQ)

This blog is heavily inspired by the @foundfamilyadoptionagency :) since they don’t allow ocs, I thought i’d make this blog!

This is the Original Character found family! Submit your OCs, and let the people of tumblr decide whether or not they should join the official (not actually official) found family of ocs.

Submit your ocs in the form below!

Rules:

1: Of course, no non-ocs. Go to the blog I linked at the top if you wish to submit characters from series’ you like!

2: No OCs created using AI “art” tools, I think this one is obvious as to why I don’t like it.

3: OCs who are based in pre-existing universes/Fandom OCs are allowed! Just. No Harry Potter. Okay?

4: Please do not submit OCs you didn’t create, unless you have permission from their creator

5: In addition to that, please do not use images of your OCs you didn’t create without permission! That goes for stuff like bases aswell. I am hesitantly allowing characters whos images were created in games (Eg. Roblox, Dress-Up Games) but this may change later.

6: Don’t make fun of others OCs, please. Someone put time and effort into those! :( Anti-propaganda is allowed, but only to counter the actual propaganda. Nothing about how an OC looks, please.

(Not-So) Frequently Asked Questions:

“How will this work?”

A post with the name of the OC alongside an image of them (if submitted) alongside a poll asking whether or not they should be adopted will be posted. Below the posts “Read More” cut, there will be propaganda (a reason or two why they should be let into the family) to entice you to choose the “Adopt” option.

“What even is a found family?”

To quote @foundfamilyadoptionagency, “A found family is a family you find for yourself. It is a term often used in fandom to describe a group of characters who aren't related by blood (although a few members might be) but have come to think of each other as a family through circumstance. Alternatively, they might not be officially recognised as a found family in canon, but wider fanon regards them as such”

“Is this a tournament bracket of sorts?”

Nope, not at all. Besides, everyone’s OCs are cool and it’d be sad if one lost to another :(

“I don’t have an image of my OC, what’s gonna happen?”

I’ll post the poll still, although without an image or with a placeholder one. For cases like these, you might wanna add some propaganda. I don’t think a name will be enough to entice a good chunk of people.

”I’ve submitted my OC, but they haven’t been submitted yet. Have you recieved them?”

Send me an ask! Chances are i’ve recieved them, and just haven’t gotten around to posting them yet, but if you’re worried, send me an ask!

“My OCs are in a group that cannot be seperated, do I submit them as a group?”

Although i’d prefer submissions of only one character at a time, if your OCs cannot be seperated, then you can submit them as a group. You know your OCs better than anyone else, after all!

“Who’s that in your profile picture? What’s your banner?”

The character in my profile picture is Poppyseed, the first character to have their poll posted, and also one of the OCs of this blog’s runner, @rubysundaey! My banner is just some silly little cat with the caption of “girl blogging” because I didn’t know what to put, and that’s how I feel whenever I post on this site

“My OC got ditched, will they have a chance to rejoin?”

Of course! Just like the blog this is based off of, I am hoping that eventually I can do a reassesment event, where i’ll bring back some OCs that got ditched and see if the people’s opinions have changed.

“This is an Ikea, why are you telling me this?”

I don’t know, i’m bored. Where’s that funny shark plush guy

#intro post #pinned #poll #tumblr poll #tumblr polls #polls #poll game #poll games #oc #ocs #found family

[toonpunk-game]

Vehicle Overview

WOO! It’s been a minute since my last post here. Well, I can tell ya, it’s because this post was really, really complex to write. We’re talking about some heavy concepts, not just about gameplay. Let me get into it here.

So when I first drafted the vehicle rules, I’d already put the finishing touches on toonpunk first edition. It was my intention, once upon a time, to release these as an expansion pack; but that expansion pack ballooned up into a whole thing, and then there was a few parts of the core book I wanted to change, and now it’s just part of second edition. In a sense I prefer that: releasing it as part of a core book keeps it from being bolted-on. Players won’t have to dip back and forth between books, and there’s (theoretically) not going to be any dangling rules contradictions.

Vehicles have their own statlines and traits, which you guys are already familiar with from the way everything else works. I’ll let the text speak for itself once the book drops, but let’s talk for a moment about the philosophy behind this section. The idea behind this section stemmed out of a gameplay concept for which I’ve gotten a fair bit of flak. That being the idea of the “van guy”. 

For as long as I’ve been developing toonpunk--even longer, actually, because I think this dates back to the first time I started playing roleplaying games--I was fascinated by the idea of the character who helps the crew tick along without being there on the frontlines. When you look at a typical roleplaying game setup everyone is some kind of hacker, gunslinger, ninja, wizard, or whatever. And those are all pretty exciting things to be, sure. 

But you look a little closer at any gang of heroes or outlaws, and who do you see standing just behind them?  You see Simon Pearson, Samwise Gamgee, Alfred Pennywise--someone who keeps the gang moving through their practical knowledge, while the “Heroic” stuff is mostly other people. Most of the time this critical supporting character stays back at the camp, or the lair, or wherever--so, in the case of a roving gang of cyberpunks, they are the “van guy”. 

Everyone seems to agree those characters kick ass. So why don’t more games let you play as them? Well, that’s what brings us to this. Read after the break for more.

The idea of a largely passive and supporting character, who helps the more combat-oriented characters mostly in a logistical and medical capacity, is something that really appealed to me. So the vehicular customization and functionality of Toonpunk grew up out of the idea that this character would have a customizable safe haven, where they help the other characters--being an in the sky, their invisible hand--who would spend most of any given game session watching and waiting, coming in clutch with some obscure skill when they’re needed most. In the book, this role is called “The Founder of the Feast”. 

My old co-conspirator pushed hard back on that character concept, categorically denying that anyone could ever find it fun. Me personally, I’m all about it. I love being kind of an invisible hand. Let me show you some of the tricks they get to play around with using the new vehicle section. On one hand, you’ve got things that let you support your teammates’ abilities, like this:

And then there’s some things that let you take center stage, like this.

But all of this is pretty simple. What made this part so difficult to write about? Well, because, simply put--it wasn’t enough, for me, for players to just drive cars. Toonpunk is a game about being a weird wacky character in an impossibly banal fucked-up world. One of the things I wanted--and this was another thing my old editor pushed back hard against--was for players to be able to play as talking cars and weapons. The hard part wasn’t drafting these rules on how vehicles would work; the hard part was figuring out how to integrate them into character creation. 

Well, I did that part. 

But then I had another, harder thing to do, which I haven’t actually done yet: which is figure out whether or not I actually should include this in the core manual. I like this idea a lot, mind you, there’s some fun stuff in here--we got acidic window-washer fluid, we got unhinging your grille and devouring people whole, we got doing really funny movements to tip-toe yourself through small places--but the core manual is already up to 210 pages and this’ll take on 30 more. So, for the last month and a half, I’ve been drafting, writing, and repeating this process in an attempt to make this thing slim enough to justify including in core but also robust enough to be worth doing.

And so far I’m not really satisfied with what I have. So this devlog ended up being late, and not having as much to show as I really would’ve liked. Sorry about that. But this does have a question, for all you out there in the audience.

Do YOU think this is worth putting into core, even if it beefs up the book? Or do you think this would be better served as a small supplement? I dunno, so...maybe you all do!

#game development #tabletop game #cyberpunk #Cartoons #cars

[braingray]

10 First Lines Tag Game

Rules: share the first lines of ten of your most recent fanfics and tag ten people. If you have written less than ten, don’t be shy and share anyway.

I was tagged by the amazing @fangqueen, and I’m with you on the haven’t-written-anything-in-a-while thing. I keep saying that I’ve been “getting back into it,” but I’ve said that for months now, lol. It has been a rocky process for sure. Thank you so much for your tag! I loved reading your snippets, especially number 10. 👀

My first four entries are from WIPs, since those are technically my most recent even if they aren’t published yet. The rest are in chronological order from my AO3. Looooooong text below the cut.

1. Cleaning out the studio was an all-day endeavor. There were old instruments gathering dust and new ones littering the chairs from their earlier practice, leaving no room for walking when combined with the boxes and knickknacks strewn across the floor. Roy carefully stepped over a fallen mess of rolled-up posters, then sidled on tiptoe around the corner of a CD rack he’d gotten from Ollie years ago, back when CDs were still cool. (Roy/Dick/Joey band AU.)

2. Harley can admit she’s a party crasher. That’s what she’s doing now, since she wasn’t officially invited to Mister Wayne’s fancy shindig at the opera house, but Selina had insisted her presence wouldn’t be a disturbance. Harley believes her. After all, Selina is Brucie’s favorite on-again-off-again squeeze, so she would probably know. (Harley/Selina cross-dressing PWP.)

3. Dick can admit when he has made a bad decision. The thing is, admitting his problem does not actually solve it, so here he is, the day after Bruce fucking Wayne put his phone number in Dick’s contacts list, paying more attention to the man’s texts than he is to his own job. He can feel Tim’s eyes on him from across the locker room, but he waits until he finishes replying to Bruce before he acknowledges the stare. “You look cute,” he says, like he wasn’t just ignoring him for the most eligible sleaze in Gotham City. (Club AU, part 4!)

4. The wind was picking up early tonight. Jason shivered through another gust, the chill biting through his insufficient layers like nothing. There would be no glory in quitting patrol early, though—least of all on Halloween night, when Gotham’s most colorful rogues always liked to create pandemonium. ‘Tis the season. (A Man-Bat/Jason PWP that was supposed to have been for Halloween/Kinktober last year...oops.)

5. Tim sits in the center of a dark garage, feeling hunted. There are two things he knows to be true in this moment. One of them is that he’s sitting on a chair with his arms bound behind it, wrists locked in place by mere cuffs. Nothing he can’t pick his way out of, given enough time. The other thing, the one that makes goosebumps rise on his skin, is that he’s here because he has pissed off the wrong man. (Caught On Tape. JayTim CNC kink—rated E.)

6. Dick had been working at this gaudy little nightclub for months. For a case, of course, and although the term undercover didn’t technically apply since he was using his real name and face, he considered it a near thing. (Let the Whole World Look In. BruDick costume kink—rated E.)

7. He found the Bat in the rubble of their latest engagement.Tonight had been disastrous for a variety of reasons, and with the latest Batarang swipe to the face—close enough that Slade swore it trimmed some stubble—he could admit he was reaching his patience threshold. (Gridlock. SladeBru stuck-in-a-wall non-con—rated E.)

8. The training room was supposed to be empty. Considering the time, with the sun beaming at its midday peak, Dick’s assumption had been that no one would be around to disturb his quest for solitary gymnastics. Damian was at school, and everyone else was usually still sleeping off the events of the previous night. (Whatever We Deny or Embrace. BruDick family fluff—rated T.)

9. Right now, there are a number of things Jason would like to address. An elbow is digging into his ribs, and he isn’t bound to anything, so it’s reasonable to assume he and whoever Dingus here is have been carelessly knocked out and dropped somewhere unsavory. (Boxing Clever. A body-swapping fic with many ships, but mainly SladeJay and RomanDick—rated E. This is only in my most recently published fics because of the final chapter update. This fic is from Kinktober 2020, lol.)

10. Tim was standing outside the door to Bruce’s office, headset hanging around his neck, mouth full of bubblegum, one hand poised and ready to knock. Casual as could be. A simple man on a simple mission who did not anticipate anything other than a brief interaction with his father figure. Inside the office, though, two voices spoke. (The Importance of Knocking. BruDick Tim’s POV—rated M.)

That’s a lot of text, phew. Tagging @withthekeyisking-writer @zeroducks-2 @sladedick !!

#lori posts #tag meme

[veliseraptor]

I just started getting into dungeons and dragons and I remembered you posted about it a bit. I immediately got uncomfortable with the clearly racist, antisemitic language, and homophobic rhetoric in the books and like rules as a queer poc. I was wondering how you dealt with that first playing it or if it was just something you never really saw in the game. Idk I was just very offput by it and was curious because I talked about this with cis white men in my campaign who were big into this game and it kinda got dismissed so just wondering your perspective on it

this ask is more than a year old sldkfjsldkfj I have no idea if it's relevant anymore but...here goes, maybe someone is still interested in my Thoughts On D&D

first off: you’re absolutely right that there is ugly stuff sublimated (or not so sublimated) in the history of D&D’s worldbuilding. I think there have been some efforts in recent years to rectify this - though I haven’t done detailed research on this, because, and this is I think the thrust of my feelings on this is pretty much that I’ve gotten out of D&D what I put into it.

the thing about D&D is that it can be a very flexible game, if you let it. there’s a lot of ways to play it - and if you step outside D&D into TTRPGs more general, there are even more. there’s a lot of room - provided you’re interacting with a group of people who are willing - to throw out the aspects of the base game that you don’t like, or don’t want to engage with. it’s true that you can be very rules-bound/rules-oriented, but you don’t need to be - or you can be and still find flexibility even within that.

I feel like...yeah, it sucks that there’s a legacy of bad politics in D&D. but you can find a way to throw those out or ignore them, if you’re invested in doing so. (for me it helps sometimes with things like this to be like. “I’m getting my grubby hands all over this and you can’t stop me.” this is also part of how I engage with HP Lovecraft stories.)

this doesn’t work for everyone - everyone’s threshold where they can’t tolerate ambient nastiness is different, not everyone is interested in retaining attachment to a thing that has racist/sexist/etc. elements even if those elements can be excised. and, finally, some of this relies on having the right group of people.

part of why it took me so darn long to get into D&D despite the fact that I was flirting with the idea for years and it very much was always relevant to my interests was the fact that I was very cautious about joining a group where I wasn’t sure that I would fit in. I didn’t start playing until I had a group of friends where I knew and trusted everyone involved. TTRPGs are kind of a team sport. I’m sorry to hear that your group was dismissive of your concerns.

I guess what I’m trying to say here is that I don’t feel like D&D (or TTRPGs in general) are necessarily, inherently tainted. I think there is a way of approaching them and engaging with them that can avoid that (or hey, if you wanted, outright play around with subverting it). but sometimes that does require a group of people who are willing to own up to their thing having issues.

idk if any of this makes sense and/or was remotely helpful. but maybe there’s something in this ramble that means something.

(if you’re talking about published D&D novels, which I realized belatedly might be the case, then I’m afraid I can’t speak to those - I’ve never read any, and probably won’t. what appeals to me about D&D is the interactive storytelling part, and that’s not there in a novel someone else wrote.)

#conversating #hippityhipem #i do not want to tag this #advice column apparently #sort of

[strwrs]

I’m enjoying the Death Star book, it’s fun you get some new characters and explore more stuff before a new hope

Legends are fun because authors just went nuts with everything because George Lucas said go ahead

Legends thrawn novels are really good and fun to read. Mara Jade is also introduced in one of those books. I haven’t exactly gotten to the later legends books. I have jumped around a bit. Also just wanted to read more of thrawn-love him.

Yoda Dark Rendevous was so good. It’s a peek into Yoda’s relationship with Dooku and that’s really interesting and kinda heartbreaking ngl. In addition to Yoda being wise and stuff you also do see yoda’s gremlin side and it’s so fucking funny.

Labyrinth of Evil is also really good. It’s taking place like right before revenge of the Sith. It’s also the first book in the Dark Lord trilogy: labyrinth of evil, the revenge of the Sith by mat strover, and then the rise of darth vader. I recommend all of them.

Labyrinth of Evil is the one with one of the most heartbreaking lines Obi-Wan has said after Anakin asked “And you Master? What does your heart tell you you’re meant for?”

And obi wan replies with a smile “infinite sadness.”

I really loved the Old Republic books and seeing the Sith at the height of their power, it’s just so interesting. The Darth Bane trilogy gives background on that infamous Sith and kinda sets up what Sidious does later on and introduces the rule of two.

There’s like at least two (so far that I’m aware of) zombie related books. So that’s interesting. Dark and graphic for sure. Just be aware of that. Red Harvest and Death Troopers are the books in case you’d rather avoid that.

There’s a Revan book that’s an addition to the game he was in. Love Revan he’s awesome.

There’s a Darth Maul book where he’s in prison and that’s fun to read. It’s called Lockdown.

Shatterpoint was really interesting, what happened to Depa was fucked up but exploring Mace Windu’s character was fun.

The Republic Commando books are fun and explore the thoughts and feelings of troopers. Before, during, and after order 66.

There’s also a two-part series called Gambit and Siege that takes place during the clone wars. Centers around Anakin and Obi-Wan.

aahhhhh tysm for these recs omg!!!!

yesss thrawn, my beloved!! i have heir to the empire rn, and it has been staring at me from my bookshelf lmao. can't wait to read the legends thrawn novels!!!!

ooohh yoda dark rendezvous sounds v interesting... gotta love the frog grandpa <3.

and labyrinth of evil is another one i have!! AND OH MY GOSH I DIDN'T REALIZE IT WAS PART OF A TRILOGY WITH THE ROTS NOVEL. I'VE GOTTA READ RISE OF DARTH VADER TOO OMG.

i am writing all of these down on my to-read list!!!! thank you so so so much; this was genuinely so helpful, and i loved reading what you thought about all of these books <33

#ty ty ty ty nonnie <333 #ask #anonymous #sw recs #<- so i can find it later if i need to!! :)

[harrietmjones]

Rules: Tag 9 people you would like to know/catch up with!

Tagged by: @naancypants

Last Song: Just realised I haven’t listened to a lot of music the last few days (😮) but it’s one of several songs. It’s either:

Help Me Mama by ZZ Ward

Kick by Def Leppard

Zombie by The Cranberries

Unstoppable by Sia

Separate Ways (Worlds Apart) by Journey

Wildest Dreams by Taylor Swift

Kick is one of their latest songs that I heard on the radio recently and so listened to it a little, Zombie is because of Derry Girls and my own musical taste, Separate Ways (Worlds Apart) because of the Season 4 trailer for Stranger Things and Wildest Dreams because of this fan video for Midge and Lenny from The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel. 💝

Last tv show: The last tv show I finished was, The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel.

Currently watching: I’ve got three shows on the go at the moment. I’m watching:

Mad Men with my mum and stepdad (or rewatching in my case, he’s never watched it before)

This Is Us with my mum

Derry Girls just for me

Currently reading: I’m honestly a big reader (and an even bigger book buyer to fill my bookshelves) but I haven’t read anything completely for so long, with suffering really really badly with my depression, anxiety and general extreme emotions. I’ve attempted with starting reading several books over the last few months, so if I ever start them up again, they are:

Brideshead Revisited by Evelyn Waugh

The House at Riverton by Kate Morton

News of the World by Paulette Jiles

The Best of Everything by Rona Jaffe

Tags: Anyone who wants to have a go! I don’t want to tag anyone who doesn’t want to do it or has already been tagged and just hasn’t gotten around to it yet. I also want anyone who may not get tagged (for whatever reason) to have the opportunity to do this themselves. 💛

#zz ward #def leppard #the cranberries #sia #journey #taylor swift #the marvelous mrs. maisel #mad men #this is us #derry girls #brideshead revisited #evelyn waugh #the house at riverton #kate morton #news of the world #paulette jiles #the best of everything #rona jaffe

[arabian-dream]

Mobile Rules

Hello there! Welcome to my rules post! These rules are password protected so please keep an eye out for it! You can send me an ask or DM me the password so I know you’ve read them and want to interact. This is a side blog so asks/follows will come from @sleepytime-muses, url for other blogs will be specified.

General roleplay etiquette applies. No god modding, no controlling my characters, etc. Literate roleplays are my go-to unless they are crack/joking with others and dash commentary. You are not obligated to match my length and vice versa, but do put some effort into the writing! I use icons as well that I make myself and format my lettering. If you want to write and find my formatting difficult to read, just let me know and I will happily use plain text. Also, if you are new to roleplaying/writing on Tumblr, I probably won’t write with you. I also prefer people who use XKit to trim posts and make them better to read. Do not approach me for strictly 18+ roleplays. Do not ask me to write characters for you that aren’t on my muse list, unless so prompted or we’re close. Do not ask me to write your harem for you.

Plotting is important to me, but not absolutely necessary. I enjoy knowing where to push the plot towards for better and more efficient writing. However, I am very capable of spur of the moment interactions so feel free to do either. If we’re mutuals, always feel free to send in ask memes and such I’ve reblogged even if we haven’t interacted before.

With my muses coming from all types of moral backgrounds, please don’t take anything said as beliefs or morals of the mun (Me.) Sometimes bad guys say bad things, sometimes good guys say bad things. I also write my characters the way I want to, which takes canon and inserts personal headcanons into blank spaces and such. I write as true to character as I can, but if you don’t care for how I portray them, then that’s fine. Take your business elsewhere! I’m gonna be sitting here playing dolls with others in peace.

Activity can be spacey. I love to write but irl responsibilities take priority. As a wage slave and an artist, I dip often. But I almost always lurk so feel free to send messages/asks. I promise I see them, its just getting around to them that’s the issue.

Let me know if you’re interested! I’m usually not the type to message first because I hate to come off as pushy. So just let me know if you want to write! I also have Discord available to write on, and it is my preferred platform. You are free to message me, ESPECIALLY if we are mutuals. Yes, YOU. The person reading this.

Original Characters and Crossovers can be hard for me to write with. Not impossible, just difficult. If I believe I can’t properly write with your character, I will let you know when you show interest. If you write a character from a franchise I’m not familiar with, I’m also less likely to write with you. I hate going in the dark when it comes to writing partners. A bio page is a great start for anything oc or non-canon related. Also, I have no issues with people who make self inserts, but I do not write with them at all. Please don’t approach me if your character is a self insert.

Triggering content will be tagged, if you have specific triggers that are uncommon I will tag them for you with a tw [CONTENT] tag. I try to pay attention to other people’s rules and general discomforts, so if I write something you don’t want to see, I’ll do my best to tag. I’m not perfect though, so let me know if I need to do something.

I love shipping. Anything NSFW will be taken to my nsfw blog. This includes adult cartoons or triggering characters that I want to keep off my main. I will not write anything NSFW with minors, it is an 18+ blog. I prefer to write with people who are 18+ already in any case. I am multi-ship so feel free to initiate with any character. Just respect my choices and I will respect yours!

If you’ve gotten this far, send me “Arabian Nights’’ to let me know you’ve read my rules! It means a lot to me! Discord roleplays/chatting is available upon request for Mutuals.

#ooc;; 🍑𝓹𝓮𝓪𝓬𝓱𝔂🍑 #psa;; read my rules #mobile friendly;; #rules post;;

[inkykeiji]

😴😴😴

#aaaah everyone i’m so sorry but i’m so tired #i didn’t get through nearly as many asks tonight as i wanted to :( #but please just know that i sincerely appreciate every single message you have sent to me #so so so much #and i will answer them all over the next few days i pinky promise #including the ones from last week that i wasn’t able to get to!!! <33333 #i’m spending the evening with a friend tomorrow but i’ll answer as many as i can in the morning!!!!! <33 #i just want to keep you all updated on that #i never want anyone to think i don’t appreciate their asks!! i do!! so much!!!! #***OH ALSO*** this is just a quick reminder that I DO NOT ANSWER ASKS OFF ANON IF YOU DONT HAVE YOUR AGE SOMEWHERE ON YOUR BLOG #so if you’re going to send an ask off anon please have your age or an age indicator SOMEWHERE on your blog #it’s in my rules but just in case you haven’t gotten around to reading them or missed it!!!! <3 #i hope everyone has a fantastic week ahead!!!! #it’s bedtime for babie clari now 😴😴😴 #so so SO tired hahahahaha #ily lots n lots pls have sweet and lovely dreams!!!!!! #clari lives life #this has been clari with the updates

[spiritualitywithtally]

Astro Notes (3/29/22)

I haven’t posted my own astro notes in a while. I’ve literally been working on this for so long. I always just keep adding whenever I get a new astro thought until it’s long enough for a post but I never felt like this one was long enough or ready for some reason 😭. But now I do , so here it is :

🌸 i personally think it would be great for everyone to manifest whenever there’s a new moon in the sign that’s in their 11th house. because 11th house represents our hopes & wishes

🌸 venus in 8th or 12th house : a love for spiritual/metaphysical things & it’s apart of your values. same can go for scorpio or pisces in the 2nd house

🌸 your 8th house may show what you love to use astrology for the most .

examples :

8th house ruler being the sun or in leo/5th house or sun/leo in the 8th might love to use it for understanding who they really are & discovering their talents/passions/hobbies

moon/cancer in the 8th house or 8th house ruler in the 4th might love to use astrology to heal themselves and to understand their family dynamics. they could study the charts of their family a lot

8th house ruler being venus or in libra/7th house or venus/libra in the 8th might love studying synastry the most

8th house ruler in mercury/gemini/sag or mercury/gemini/sag in the 8th might love it all around. they just love the knowledge it gives for a lot of different things & also use it to understand different people & they way that they are

virgo in the 8th/8th house ruler in virgo/6th house might use astrology to plan out things a lot

chiron/scorpio/pluto in the 8th house or 8th house ruler in the 8th/12th might really love to get a deep understanding of their traumas through astrology

🌸 venus in aries ppl LOVE head 😭

🌸 if you have a lot of personal planets conjunct your north node (making it opposite your south node) you’re very in tune with your purpose in this life and probably figure it out or have an idea pretty early on in life. you likely don’t have toooo hard of a time breaking out of some of your past life patterns. mmm, let me rephrase. it could be hard but like you have a deep need for understanding your patterns & letting go of them. rather than just having a “that’s just who i am” mindset

🌸 profection year note!! so this is piggybacking off of @lunarliyah ‘s profection notes. (i’m sorry, i can’t find the post). if i do, i’ll link it. so in the last one , she said the sign that rules the profection house is significant. i have another theory that’s accurate in my case. but it gets a bit complicated if you usually have trouble with this.

basically, the sign that rules the profection house - look at where that sign is placed in the houses of your birth chart. that may be a significant theme in your life that year.

example : 7th house is ruled by libra. libra is in MY 9th house. i went to college during my 7th house profection year & just went through a lot at that time so it was veryyy significant. (9th house is higher education)

another example : 8th house is ruled by scorpio. scorpio is in my 10th house (using placidus). i’m in my 8th house year now & it’s really been the start of one of my career journeys with doing readings & spiritual work

last example : scorpio is also in my 11th house, if i use whole sign. & i met a new friend this year that’s i’ve gotten really close with i don’t really make friends a lot

🌸 people who have personal planets in the same sign as your mars sign could be people you’ve developed an anger or annoyance towards at some point in your life

🌸 people with scorpio in the 5th house like to be private about the things they’re passionate about / the things they create. if they share those things with you, you’re really special to them & they trust you deeply

🌸 cancer mars in the 7th house = starting to cry if arguments seem unfair. like if someone just keeps talking over you, or just keep disregarding everything you say or very clearly try to gaslight you

🌸 leo risings tend to attract (in friendships & relationships) ppl who are really into astrology, because of aquarius in the 7th house. this can apply to people who have aquarius in the 11th house as well, but just friendship wise

🌸 if you’re wondering about someone’s placement & you’re stuck between two neighbor signs, then i’d go with the latter sign . because then they’d be that sign in western astrology & also the other sign in vedic astrology so it makes sense

🌸 adding onto that, easy way to know/remember your vedic placements : it’s always 24° before your tropical placement. so it’s likely the sign before your tropical placement. UNLESS you have your tropical placement in a late degree. Example : my tropical sun is 29° gemini & in vedic astrology , it’s still gemini but at 5° instead

🌸 7th house placements can often seem like they’re followers or copy cats but here me out (can apply to libra placements too) i believe that these people are literally MEANT to find themselves through other people & their connections, especially if they have no 1st house placements. so when they observe other people & the actions of others that make sense to them/resonate with them, they can then take on those traits or thoughts themselves. & it’s not necessarily that they’re copying. it’s just that this person has now activated this part of them/made them realize this part of themselves

#astrology psychic #astro notes #astro observations #astrology observations #astrology notes #7th house #8th house #new moon #venus in 8th house #venus in 12th house #profection year #5th house #scorpio in 5th house #vedic astrology

[adrikazu]

Um- I have a request, I did read the rules but I already forgot some of them_ so if you don't want to write this, I understand dw. And I apologise in advance if it's the case ;;

May I request Kaeya and Diluc with a gn!reader who breaks down after trying to get better for years, without success ? reader kind of just shuts down and stops paying attention to their health, they can't enjoy anything and (tw: suicide, please don't force yourself to read this if it makes you feel uncomfortable) think about how they would like to end everything ? Like they're just giving up because they never get better anyway.

I wish you a good day, or a good night!

BREAKING DOWN READER

FEATURING— kaeya, diluc

GENRE— angst, both with a little bit of comfort fluff at the end

NOTES— hi anon!!! i’m okay with this request, and i haven’t gotten an angsty request yet so this’ll be my first, and i hope i did this justice. sorry for this taking so long, i really wanted to collect my thoughts for this one. by the way, if you ever need to talk to anyone about anything i’m always open to listen, you’re not alone okay?

WARNINGS— TW: mentions of suicide, death, self harm, overall angst

KAEYA

he was at the knights of favonious HQ, and he was about to head home

something didn’t feel right, or something at least felt off to him in his gut immediately

Kaeya thought it was a little childish of him to hurry home from work because of this

but he was glad he did so when he got there

he found you, hugging your knees close to your face in your shared bedroom

at first his stomach dropped, eyes widened and he almost couldn’t move from where he stood

but he approached you, his silence almost unrecognizable

“love? are you alright?”

if you were to slowly leap into his arms, he’d be happy to accept you for a hug and embrace you tightly, not caring in the slightest if his uniform got wet because of your tears

if you were to refuse his hug, he would understand and not at all be upset with you

he doesn’t want to pressure you into speaking but he would be happy to listen

when you rant on about trying so hard to get better, and yet to fail, he’s ready to encourage you

kaeya himself had struggled, he wants to help even if he’s ashamed about his previous weak state

and by saying that he doesn’t mean to say you’re weak, he means that he wants to support you up so you don’t get stuck like he did

kaeya believes having someone there for you will be helpful, and he offers to be that person

if you stay quiet, he doesn’t mind

if he was upset he probably would’ve done the same thing

kaeya gets up, prepares food and gets you things you like

when you refuse to eat is when he’s over the top concerned

you say you want to die, you don’t want to be continuing your life and neglect your health, he’s in deep thought

whatever it may be, Kaeya will stay by your side and compliment you, and be proud of every achievement even if it’s a small one such as eating, or brushing your teeth

he loves your company, he likes everything about you and he can’t imagine a world without you in it with him

DILUC

he’s taking care of his tavern

and his gut is screaming at him to do something

he peers around at everyone drinking, enjoying themselves and he looks back down to the glass cups he’s been cleaning

he wants to go home, and he apologizes when he calls someone to take the tavern for the night

diluc slinks his jacket on, looks back one last time and makes his way home

he gets there, maids are fussing about

they rush to him

“Master Diluc, Master/Miss s/o—”

he stops them there

he doesn’t like the way they say your name in worry, and in fear. it puts his own heart in jeopardy

the door opens and he sees you, unresponsive while curled up in bed

diluc approaches you in silence, and merely looks at you with worry

he’s not experienced with this, he doesn’t know what he should do and he’s beginning to regret not asking the maids for guidance before coming in

after a few minutes he’ll ask if you’re alright

you shake your head, your eyes showing him emptiness and you seem tired after laying in bed for so long

he doesn’t push you, not even when you refuse to eat or shower or do anything

what diluc actually does, is patiently wait for you to open up

he wants to hear what’s wrong and he does everything in his power to help

when you talk about your desire to disappear, he’s silent

this is another man who understands what that feeling is like, and he wouldn’t wish that feeling on anyone. especially not you

he’ll pull you in for hug, clutching you as if you’re fine china and you could break with any scratch

diluc does everything he can, consults his most trusted people and will be there everytime you want something. he’s a little lost in this situation but he cares, and he’s going to try his best to help

#genshin x reader #diluc x reader #kaeya x reader #genshin impact kaeya #genshin kaeya #genshin impact diluc #genshin diluc #kaeya alberich #kaeya alberich x reader #diluc ragnivindr x reader #diluc ragnvindr #genshin impact x reader #genshin headcanons #genshin angst #genshin impact angst #diluc angst #karuta angat #kaeya x reader angst #diluc x reader angst

[deanstead]

Somebody’s Watching

Pairing: Jay Halstead x Reader

Request by danipearl16: Request- Jay has a girlfriend that nobody knows about and then they get a case where she’s being stalked and her stalker is killings women that seem to remind him of her and it turns out to be her ex-boyfriend from high school and Jay starts going downhill a little bit because he’s worried about her. Also his girlfriend is more on the younger than his side by 7 years

Word Count: 4,365

Warnings: cursing, mention of sexual assault/misconduct (non-graphic), mention of non-con touching, stalking, minor OC death, mention of injury, angst, fluff

A/N: Please beware of the triggers before you continue reading! I changed some parts to fit into the storyline but I still hope you like what I did with it! I’m pretty excited about this fic so I really really hope yall will like it! It’s my first time writing such a detailed case in so I hope it turned out well? Please hit me up and let me know what you think! Love yall!

---

You looked up from where you were sprawled on the couch, fiddling with your phone. Jay was sitting at the table, a small frown across his face as he pored over case notes.

Jay usually didn’t bring his work home with him but they’d just closed a big case and he had spent a whole week in the district. So instead of spending more time there to finish the paperwork, Jay had opted to bring it home instead.

You smiled to yourself just as Jay looked up. “Sorry babe.” He said, making a little face at the papers strewn across the table.

Chuckling, you climbed off the couch and moved towards him. You stood behind him, looping your arms around his shoulders, resting your chin on his shoulder. “I missed you.” You whispered.

Jay turned slightly, tugging you so that you now landed in his lap.

“Missed you too.” He whispered, smiling as one of his arms snaked around your waist, holding you securely to him, another hand reaching up to cup your cheek. “Sorry I’ve been busy.”

You shook your head, smiling.

You’d been dating for a while but no one else knew. Both of you had agreed to keep it on the down low, partly because of your age difference. Even though you had agreed you’d keep it quiet at least for the first few months, it had been a lot more than that and it had been going so well that you didn’t really want to purposefully invite anyone into this world that Jay and you had created for yourselves. Rather than keeping it a secret, you guys just hadn’t made the effort to tell anyone or publicize it to the world. This also meant that when he was stuck at the district, you didn’t get to see him but on such days, Jay was always mindful about checking in.

“What’s on your mind?” Jay asked.

“Just thinking I’m lucky to have you.” You responded, leaning in to try to give him a hug. Instead, Jay stroked your cheek and pressed his lips to yours. “Now, I really need to finish this.”

You laughed. “Go forth.”

---

Jay had taken a few well-deserved days of furlough, which he had mostly spent curled up with you. You didn’t have any complaints, it had been just what you both needed.

But Intelligence couldn’t catch a break. It was Jay’s first day back and now, he was already walking up to a crime scene.

Jay pushed the yellow crime scene tape upwards, letting Hailey walk through ahead of him before following behind her.

“What do we have?” Jay asked, approaching the spot where Adam and Kim were standing.

Kim turned. “Kate Whitewood, 22, stabbed multiple times.”

“She’s not in the system. No priors, nothing.” Adam added.

“No belongings on her?” Voight asked, looking around.

Adam shook his head. Jay frowned. “There’s barely any blood here.”

Kevin nodded, jogging forward to join them. “This is probably just the dump site. She must have been killed elsewhere.”

Hailey stood from where she had bent to examine the body. “She has defensive wounds on her. Maybe we’ll get lucky and find skin under her fingernails.”

Jay bent forward slightly. “What are those? Marks around her neck? We need to get her to the ME to get the exact cause of death.”

“Kim, bag her hands and get forensics to run a deluxe.” Voight said, as Kim nodded.

“My CI works this street, let me see what I can find out.” Jay said, turning away.

---

“So Kate was last seen at this bar right in town.” Hailey said, walking in and sticking a screenshot onto the board, which showed a camera view of the street outside the bar.

Kate could be seen on the image, her head turned slightly as she waved to someone, a man standing by her side. Hailey tapped the image.

“We can’t find this guy. His face is always turned away from the camera, facial recognition is out.”

Voight nodded. “Jay, have you heard from your CI?”

Jay nodded, resting slightly against Hailey’s desk, his arms crossed in front of him. “My guy says there haven’t been any deals going down. I think we can rule out drugs or gangs. Streets have been quiet ever since that big bust we did last month.”

“It was 28 degrees out last night, ME couldn’t find the exact time of death. But there were signs she was raped, signs of asphyxiation and five penetration wounds from a knife.” Kevin said, opening the file he had gotten from the medical examiner earlier.

Voight turned to Kim. “Who was she?”

Kim sighed. “Kate was a hard worker, she had just started her job as a receptionist at a dentist’s office in South Loop. Dad’s MIA, Mum’s remarried and relocated to New York so she’s living on her own.”

“Have we found who she was with last night?”

Adam nodded. “I’ve gone through her phone. Looks like she was meeting her friend Grace at the club last night.”

“We need to talk to her. I want to know about the last day of Kate’s life. Timeline. Check all sex offenders in the area. Comb her social media. Let’s go.” Voight instructed.

---

Jay knocked on the main door, glancing sideways at Hailey. The door swung open.

“Grace Archer? I’m Detective Upton, this is Detective Halstead, can we come in?” Hailey asked.

She furrowed her brows. “What’s this about?”

“You’re friends with Kate Whitewood?” Hailey asked, without directly answering her question. She nodded and without missing a beat, Hailey continued, “We need to ask you a few questions about last night.”

Grace stepped back to let them in, her face falling as she led them to the sitting room.

“I heard from her parents. The whole thing’s horrible.” Grace whispered, wrapping her hands around herself.

“Can you tell us what you remember?” Jay asked.

Grace looked up. “Kate’s boyfriend had broken up with her a few months ago, so I took her out. She needed to get out again.”

“Were you approached by anyone?” Hailey asked.

“Several.” She answered.

“Anyone that stood out?”

Grace paused, trying to recall. “Kate didn’t even really want to go. She barely looked at the guys… except…”

Hailey sat up a little. “There must have been something about this guy that she left with, something unique. We have a photo of him on the surveillance tape. Flashy?”

Grace nodded, “Yeah, he had this like... attitude… like he was hitting on us but he was making a joke of it at the same time.” She paused. “The last thing she told me was that she had a great time… I shouldn’t have forced her to come out.”

“This isn’t your fault.” Hailey leaned over and patted Grace comfortingly on the arm. “Thanks for talking to us. Please call us if you think of anything else.”

As Jay walked out of Grace’s house with Hailey, he looked at his partner. “This guy’s confident, he’s smooth and it doesn’t look like he knew Kate or Grace.”

---

For the rest of the day, the team had almost combed through the whole of Kate’s whereabouts before she had disappeared and all they had was a big fat nothing.

Jay typed a quick text to you to let you know that he wasn’t going to be able to come over tonight.

You read the text, smiling a little. Jay was busy but it was cute that he always kept you informed. You stopped walking, typing back a reply to tell him it was okay and to do what he had to do, before you kept her phone back into your pocket.

You walked along the street, the same street you walked on every night, frowning a little. You turned around, scanning the street behind you.

You could swear that it was like someone was watching you, or following you. But the street was empty. This wasn’t the first time you had had this feeling - like the little hairs on the back of your neck were standing but you had nothing to back up this feeling you had.

Holding your bag tighter against you, you pushed yourself forward, quickening your footsteps, only letting up as you passed the safety of your apartment building’s front door.

As you passed the threshold of your apartment and closed the door behind you, you pulled out your phone, staring at it for a while. Part of you wanted to call Jay, to hear his voice and have him tell you that you were just tired, imagining things. But the rational part of your brain convinced yourself that everything was okay, reminding you that Jay was so busy and deep in a case, he really shouldn’t have to worry about you.

Ultimately, you put your phone on the counter, chuckling at yourself. Maybe you really were too tired.

---

By the next morning, another body had turned up, not two streets away from the first dump site.

Jay felt an uneasy feeling spread in the pit of his stomach as he stared at the photo of the new victim that was already up on the board. They had a serial killer in Chicago and this guy’s victim type had physical characteristics that were scarily similar to you.

“Jay.” Hailey broke Jay out of his thoughts. “Emma Green, 23, strangulation marks, six stab wounds.”

Jay turned to his partner and nodded. “Did they go to the same club?”

Hailey handed Jay a file. “No, but look at what we picked up on the surveillance camera.” Jay opened the file, studying the photo.

“This is our guy isn’t it?” He pointed at a male figure who was standing next to their second victim, his face still hidden from the camera, wearing a plain cap.

“Hey guys, I might have found a link.” Kim said, walking in. “I checked the employee records and there’s a bartender that works in both clubs and he was on shift on each day our victims went missing. He’s got a prior for aggravated assault and harassment.”

“We’ll take it.” Jay said, grabbing his jacket and heading out of the district.

Hailey fell into step next to him, glancing at him. “Jay, you okay?”

Jay nodded. “Let’s just get this son of a bitch.”

They travelled the rest of the way in silence. Hailey seemed to pick up that this case was affecting Jay differently but she didn’t press further, allowing Jay to lead the way into the closed club.

“Ben Carlton?”

The bartender looked up from where he was, his eyes falling onto the police badge that was hung around Jay’s neck.

In a sudden motion, he ducked out and ran.

“Hey, stop!” Jay yelled, as both he and Hailey launched themselves after him, Hailey shooting out the front door to try to head him off.

“5021 George, I have a suspect fleeing on foot.” Jay called into his radio, sprinting after the bartender.

The bartender barely made it onto the next street before Hailey flung herself at him around the corner, rolling onto the ground as Jay pulled out his gun. “Don’t move!” He yelled, as Hailey pulled the bartender to his feet.

“Let’s go.” Jay snarled.

---

“It wasn’t me!” Ben yelled as he sat in the interrogation room, facing Jay and Hailey.

Jay sighed internally, watching Ben’s reactions and the way he was answering the questions Hailey was shooting at him.

“Those were mistakes, I didn’t do this!” He yelled again.

Jay pushed himself upright, getting up from where he was leaning against the wall and pushing the photos of the victims onto the table. “This. Look at this. We can place these girls at the bars you worked at just before they died.”

“Look.” Ben said, looking up at Jay. “I saw them but they left before I even finished my shift.”

Jay glanced at Hailey. “Who did they leave with?” Hailey asked.

Ben looked from Hailey to Jay. “Look, I don’t know the guy, he’s not a regular. But he’s white, about their age. I noticed him because he headed for them the moment that he walked in. Like he knew they were there.”

Before Jay or Hailey moved, a knock came from the door.

“You guys gotta see this.” Adam said, sticking his head in.

“Sit tight.” Jay said to Ben, following Adam outside, where Kevin was waiting as well.

Kevin handed the file to Jay. “We got another one.” Jay flipped open the file, which told him what he already feared. Another victim, of a physical type that not only matched the first two victims but also you.

Jay looked up. “His cooling off period is getting shorter. We need to get this son of a bitch.”

---

The feeling was getting a little stronger that someone had been watching you.

You glanced over your shoulder but as usual the street was empty. Maybe you needed to stop staying late.

You turned back towards the front. There were sounds of footsteps but you swallowed the lump in your throat, quickening your pace as discreetly as you could.

It definitely felt like someone was following you now. You were almost running by the time you rounded the corner, colliding with someone.

You gave a yelp of surprise.

“Y/N!”

You had collided with Jay.

You let out a breath, spinning around to look over your shoulder.

“What’s going on? You okay?” Jay’s eyes snapped from you to the empty street behind you.

You turned back to look at Jay. Now that he was standing in front of you, it didn’t seem that scary anymore - maybe you had imagined the whole thing.

You shook your head, taking one last glance behind you. “What are you doing here? You finished the case?”

Jay smiled but the smile didn’t really reach his eyes. “Just wanted to check in on you. I have to go back soon.”

You reached for his hand without saying anything and that’s how the both of you walked back to your apartment, your hand clenched securely in his, almost like the both of you had a tight bubble around you.

You could tell Jay’s mind was far away, and it was even more unlike him to come see you in the middle of a case. You knew there was something troubling him but you weren’t one to press. Jay would tell you when he felt he could or he wanted to.

Instead, you just squeezed his hand.

Almost as if you were prying him from his thoughts, Jay looked at you and smiled. He pulled you closer to him, tucking you under his arm.

“You’re okay, right?” You asked, without looking up at him, just as he escorted you to your door.

Jay turned to look at you and nodded. “I will be, once this case is over.” He leaned forward to give you a kiss. “If anything happens, you call me, okay? No matter what.”

You raised an eyebrow but nodded at him, watching him disappear into the elevator before you retreated back into your apartment.

---

Intelligence had been tirelessly chasing down leads but they now had four bodies and Voight was getting pressure to solve this quickly as well. They needed a break in this case and fast.

“Okay, let’s regroup, what do we have so far?” Voight barked.

“All four victims were raped and found with multiple stab wounds. We know he picks up his victims from bars and appears non-threatening enough that his victims are willing to leave with him.” Jay said, getting up.

Hailey headed to the board, frowning. “We dumped their phones but we weren’t able to find any connection between the victims other than their physical type.” Hailey cast a look at Jay, which Voight didn’t miss. “I think he’s working his way up to something.”

“Hey guys?” Kim spoke up as she walked back in, flipping open the file sitting on her desk. “I went back over the first murder to see if we missed anything. Look at this.”

Kim pulled in her chair, zooming into the photo. “This badge here on his jacket, it’s barely visible so we missed it the first few times. I sent it to the lab to see if they could enhance the image and this is what I got.”

Kim clicked and up popped the crest of a high school. “Look, it’s not just a general badge. Look at the year.”

“Okay, that is the crest for Lincoln High. It’s a jacket given to those who graduated that year.” Kevin said, frowning at it.

“I’ll run the list of students who graduated in that year.” Jay barked, heading straight for his desk, his fingers flying across his keyboard.

Cross-checking was the worst job ever but the moment Jay’s eyes landed on your name on the list of graduates, he pulled it together, eliminating the women, men who had moved out of state or country, until finally he only had three names on the list.

“Okay, I have a Steven Miller, Charles Shoemaker and John Marlin.” Jay finally spoke up as everyone looked up. “But only Steven Miller has priors.”

“For harassment, sexual misconduct, and attempted assault. Sarge, this has to be our guy.” Jay looked up at Voight.

“Do we have an LKA?” Voight asked.

“Already on it.” Adam said.

“Go pick him up.” Adam nodded, motioning to Kevin as they headed out.

Something was bugging Jay. Steven Miller. That name was…

Fuck.

Jay pushed back his chair, entering Voight’s office without knocking and closing the door behind him.

“Sarge.”

Voight looked up, frowning a little at the look on Jay’s face. He put down his pen and leaned back in his chair, looking up at Jay.

“I’ve heard Miller’s name before. It was bugging me, but I remember now.”

Voight sat up straighter.

“I’m seeing his ex-girlfriend.” The words slipped past Jay’s lips. “Sarge, everything makes sense now. The physical type, the way he’s building up because his actual target…” Jay trailed off.

You had told Jay about Steven just once. You hadn’t gone into detail but you had told Jay about the short period that you had been together with Steven – his need for control over all aspects of your life, how he had always been a little rough, how he hadn’t taken any form of rejection well, and how you’d ended it the day he struck you.

“Take Hailey.”

Jay was already halfway to the door.

---

You had left early today.

It had been a while since you had done such an early shift but you’d been feeling more and more uneasy while walking home at night and the news coverage on the murders that were happening at the moment didn’t help.

You didn’t need Jay to tell you that you looked exactly like those girls who had been murdered. It was clear as day.

You fiddled with the key in the lock, opening the door.

You felt your heart drop into your stomach as you registered the person standing in front of you. In your house.

“Steven.” You muttered, your voice trembling, barely registering the butt of a gun heading towards your temple before it went dark.

---

Hailey hadn’t said anything but she knew something was off.

“Jay, what’s going on?” She asked. “How do you know this girl’s the target?”

Jay didn’t answer but pressed harder on the accelerator, gripping the steering wheel so hard, his knuckles were white. The ringing tone going off through his bluetooth speaker in the car making him feel even worse.

“Jay.” Hailey said again. “I’m your partner.”

Jay glanced at her now. “She’s my girlfriend.”

Hailey’s eyebrows shot up. “I didn’t even know you were seeing someone.”

Jay let a beat of silence passed. “Miller’s her ex. I should have seen the signs, the physical type, everything, I…”

“Jay. She’ll be fine. Come on.” Hailey reassured him, as he turned his truck onto the familiar street.

“She’s still not answering.” Jay said, through gritted teeth. He’d been trying to call you since he had left the station.

Without hesitation, Jay bounded up the stairs, Hailey right behind him. From down the corridor, Jay could already tell your door was slightly ajar.

“Hang back.” Jay whispered, pulling out his service weapon.

Jay quietly approached the door. “Y/N?” He opened the door with his foot, freezing as his eyes landed on you, sitting in a chair in the middle of the room, your eyes frantic as Steven held a knife to your throat from where he stood behind you.

Jay gritted his teeth, using his foot to slam the door shut, knowing that Hailey would know what to do.

“Step away from her.” Jay growled, pointing his gun directly at Steven.

Steven smiled. “I was wondering when you’d arrive. Put that down.”

Jay grinded his teeth but didn’t move. You felt the cold blade of the knife press against your skin and inhaled sharply.

“Put. It. Down.” Steven repeated.

“Okay, okay.” Jay said, glancing at you before putting his hands above his head, disarming his gun and putting it down onto the floor.

Steven smiled again, tucking a stray hair behind your ear.

“Don’t you fucking touch her.” Jay growled.

“I don’t think you’re in a position to tell me what to do.” Steven answered.

“Jay, I’m sorry.” You whispered.

Jay looked straight at you. “It’s going to be okay. You focus on me, you hear me? I’m right here.”

“We broke up a long time ago, what the hell are you doing?” You asked. You were afraid, hell you were trembling, but this was crazy and you had to help Jay to find a way out of this.

“We wouldn’t be broken up if he hadn’t come between us.” Steven snarled, moving closer towards you, his lips almost touching your ear.

Jay growled. “Leave her alone.”

Steven looked back up at Jay again.

“What, you mean don’t do this?” Steven asked, crushing his lips against yours.

“Don’t you fucking touch her!” Jay yelled. “Is that what you did? How you forced yourself on all the other girls? What do you want, Steven? What are you trying to accomplish?”

“All I wanted was to be with Y/N! But you took her.” He spat.

“So you decided to go on a rampage?” Jay asked. You saw him twitch like he was looking for something so you started talking, as much as it made you want to gag.

“Steven, why didn’t you just talk to me?” You asked, trying to distract him.

“Talk? All you care about is him!” He yelled, lifting the knife and pointing it at Jay.

It happened in a split second.

The moment he lifted the knife, Jay yelled, “Now, Y/N!”

You threw yourself forward, covering your head with your hands as you heard the gunshots go off, just two. You weren’t sure who was shooting but you didn’t move until you heard Jay’s voice again.

“Y/N, it’s okay, it’s over.” Jay whispered.

You looked up, Jay’s face hovering above you.

“Jay…”

Jay nodded, “It’s okay, come here.”

Jay pulled his arms around you.

“He…” Jay shook his head, shielding your view of Steven’s now motionless body. “Don’t look back, come on.”

Jay tried to lead you out of the apartment, barely making it to the main door before his teammates appeared. “Jay!” Kevin called, as he spotted both of you.

Jay nodded. “Thanks.” Kevin nodded, his eyes lingering on the way Jay was holding you close to his side before making way for Jay to lead you back down to the ground floor where the ambulances were waiting.

Jay led you all the way to the waiting paramedics, not even leaving your side to get himself checked.

You weren’t hurt, not really. There was a little open cut from where Steven had pressed the blade a little too hard when he had been agitated but other than that you were fine. Well, that, and that disgusting feeling that came with remembering how Steven had pressed his lips against yours.

Voight approached you and Jay. Jay squeezed your hand. “I’ll be right back.” You smiled and nodded.

Jay and Voight talked in low voices until Voight turned to look at you. “And she’s okay?”

Jay nodded. “Yeah, she is. I just need to…”

“Do what you need to do. We’ll finish up here.” Voight said, nodding and clapping Jay on the back.

---

The paramedics had dressed the wound on the scene before Jay had brought you back to his apartment.

After getting you into a clean change of clothes and some warm food in you, you had ended up back in your favourite place in the world – on Jay’s couch, in Jay’s apartment, encircled in Jay’s arms.

You lay your head on Jay’s chest.

“So this was all because of me?” You asked in a low voice.

Jay sat up, looking at you. “What?”

“He killed all those women… because of me. I got them killed.” You whispered.

“No, no, baby.” Jay propped himself up, but didn’t let you go. “This is not your fault. Steven he… he did this, not you.”

You looked up at him. “He even… in front of you… he…” You could feel tears welling up in your eyes, you felt disgusting. He’d kissed you, he’d done it in front of Jay and he’d ruined everything.

You hadn’t said that much but Jay just tilted your chin upwards and kissed you. “Jay…”

“I’ll take it all away.” Jay whispered. “I’m sorry, I should have been there sooner.”

You shook your head, swiping away the tears that had slid down your cheeks.

Jay cupped your cheek again, pulling you into his chest. You balled your hand around his shirt, gripping at Jay.

“It’s okay, I’m here. I’m not going anywhere.” Jay whispered.

“I’ll never let anyone touch you ever again.” He half snarled, still caressing you gently.

You leaned into his embrace, closing your eyes as the sound of Jay’s heartbeat gently lulled you back into the feeling of safety and security.

#jay halstead x reader #jay halstead #resanoona request #tw #jay halstead oneshot #jay halstead imagine #chicago pd x you

[thefanficmonster]

What's It To You?

Corpse Husband x Reader (Female)

Warnings: Swearing

Genre: Angst, Fluff

Summary: To some people, relationship labels aren’t important. To some they aren’t important only in theory. Well, Y/N finds out she falls in the later category, leading to a falling out with her boyfriend Corpse.

Requested by Anon. You’ll know who you are when you read the fic 😉 Thank you for the ‘angsty argument’ request. I hope I captured what you had in mind and I hope you enjoy the read. Love, Vy 🥰

The time is nearing 7PM and Corpse has barely eaten anything. I always keep track of his meals and time spent in front of a computer screen, making sure he doesn’t spend too much time exhausting his eyes or starving himself. He never notices he’s hungry until he takes a bite of something and his appetite grows in  matter of seconds. The real battle is to get him to take that first bite.

I get up from the couch, walking into the kitchen. I open the fridge, scanning its contents for any ideas that might pop into my head for dinner. When nothing comes to mind, I resort to my last option - asking him. There’s only a slight chance he’ll be of any help. He’ll most likely say he’s not hungry or that he’ll make himself something late. He never does. I’ve gotten used to him being a man-child when it comes to eating. In the eleven months that we’ve been dating, I’ve force fed him more times than he has eaten on his own terms.

I go upstairs, stopping outside the door to his recording room to see if he’s talking to someone so I don’t walk in and interrupt. When no noises come from the inside I knock. 

“Come in.“ 

Upon opening the door, I’m met with Corpse nonchalantly sitting in his desk chair, leaning as back as he can without tipping over. Arms folded behind his head, legs stretched out in front of him. The whole nine yards, suggesting that he not streaming.

“Hey.“ He greets me as he turns his chair a bit in an attempt to face me

“Hey, what’d you like for dinner?“ He opens his mouth to reply the millisecond after I have spoken my question. I already know what that reply will be so I hurry to prevent it, “And no, ‘later’ and ‘I’m not hungry’ aren’t on the menu.“

He sighs, shaking his head as though he’s disappointed that I caught onto his game. The smile that slowly makes its way to his lips, however, suggests that he appreciates my concern. “Grilled cheese sandwiches? I mean, if you feel like it.”

I smile, relieved that the usual convincing portion of our interaction on this specific matter has been avoided. “Ok. Be down in fifteen then.” I give him a nod before heading back out into the hallway.

Before I am able to close the door, I hear someone else’s voice come from behind me. “Hey Corpse, was that on your end?”

Oh shit, he wasn’t muted

“Yeah man, sorry. Accidentally unmuted myself.“ Corpse sounds unbothered by this, but I am a little uneasy now.

Corpse and I have agreed to keep our relationship by a ‘won’t ask, won’t tell’ rule - if someone asks him if he’s in a relationship, he won’t lie and say no, but we haven’t gone public nor do we plan on doing so without someone asking us about it head-on. Well, not us. Him. His friends don’t know me and neither do his fans. I’m not in the same industry. I don’t stream nor film YouTube videos. The most I do for that platform is help Corpse with some editing when he needs to have a rest. So, if anyone were to reveal our relationship, it’d be him.

“Oooh, who was that?“ A girl’s voice asks teasingly. “Corpse, what are you not telling us?“

By this point, I’m out in the hall but I left my ears in the room. I know I’m not in the right here - eavesdropping is most definitely not nice, but I can’t help myself.

I hear him chuckle, “Nah, it’s just my friend Y/N.”

My heart drops so suddenly for a reason beyond my understanding. I feel like a kid feels when it’s told Santa isn’t real - I can’t believe what I heard. 

I hurry to get back downstairs as soon as possible and also as quietly as I can. It’s tough, running with a pit in your stomach and a knot of I’m pretty sure is tears in your throat. When I’m finally in the kitchen, the aforementioned tears are blurring my vision. I try to blink them away but accidentally send one of them trickling down my cheek.

I’m aware this might be an overreaction and if I stopped to think I could probably find ways to justify what Corpse said. But I’m genuinely hurt, and I hate that I am.

I’ve never cared about what others know about me or think of me. Same goes for my relationships. I don’t put labels on things nor on my connection to people. I am surprised and disturbed by how much the label ‘friends’ bothers me. We’ve been dating for almost a year now, you’d think calling me his girlfriend would be second nature. Guess not.

I swallow the hurt and surprise, deciding to keep myself busy with the preparations for the dinner I was planning to make. However, keeping my hands full and giving my eyes a place to look doesn’t stop my thoughts from eating away at me. 

                                                             * * *

Twenty minutes later the sound of a door opening echoes from upstairs, followed by the sound of footsteps going through the hallway and then down the stairs. 

“It smells so good in here.“ He comments, his eyebrows raising when he takes in the freshly made sandwiches on the kitchen island. “You’re the best, Y/N.“

“Hmm, aren’t you lucky you have a friend who knows their way around the kitchen, huh?“ I reply sharply, not even sparing him a glance.

In the twenty minutes I was left alone with my wilding thoughts I declared that I wouldn’t beat around bush when he comes downstairs. That I would address the issue and tell him exactly how I feel about it. What I didn’t plan was being so harsh. I actually barely contain a wince when I realize how sharp of an edge my words had.

I feel ten times more guilty when I see the regret that flashes on his face, “You heard that.” He grips the edges of the table, leaning down and letting out a sigh, “I’m sorry, I panicked.”

The anger in me evaporates, leaving room for the hurt to keep spreading and take over me. I was never really angry with him, I’m just upset by the fact that his immediate reaction wasn’t to refer to me as his girlfriend. 

“Why would you panic? What’s it to you if they know?“ My voice is barely above a whisper now, the tears I’m fighting back are clogging my throat, not allowing me to sound as clearly as I’d like.

“What’s it to you? I thought you didn’t care.“ He argues back, his gaze travelling from the tabletop to my eyes. I see the guilt in all his features and his body language.

“I thought so too.“ I shake my head, “But hearing you call me a ‘friend’...’just a friend’ stings. I don’t even know why, but it does. It feels almost like you are embarrassed of me. If that’s the case you can just tell me, you know?“

In a blink of an eye he’s crouched down in front of me, one hand holding both of mine while the other cups my cheek. “It’s not. It has never been and it will never be the case. You are one amazing person, Y/N. You deserve the world, not to be stuck with me. I’m just...” He trails off, his eyes not able to focus on mine any longer, “I’m scared of how people knowing about us will affect our relationship.”

My blood starts boiling again. I know I need to get away from him before I reach the point of saying something that’ll hurt him, so I untangle my hands from his grasp, pulling away from him. “Weak excuse, Corpse. You know it will change nothing except make me feel more included in your life. I will no longer feel like I’m a house rat no one knows about.” I stand up, unable to look at him, and start heading for the staircase. 

“Y/N, please! ”I stop dead in my tracks when he calls out my name, his footsteps following behind me. “Don’t be...-”

I turn around, cutting him off in the process, “I need to be alone right now.” I tilt my head in the direction of the dining table, “Sit down and eat dinner. We’ll talk...later.”

                                                             * * *

Now that it’s been almost twelve hours with no contact between us I realize that my reaction was justified only to a certain extent. I understand his concerns and I could’ve expressed mine a little more calmly and in a lot less accusatory manner. But what happened happened and all I can do now is go over to him and apologize, establish a proper communication to resolve the issue that I so stupidly blew out of proportion.

My phone died sometime during the night and has been sitting on the charger but still turned off for a while. I go over to it and press-hold the start button. While it’s powering up I start changing my from my pajamas into my regular clothes, noticing a small stain on my shirt in the process. As I’m examining the stain, my phone starts going crazy with notifications, causing me to jump and drop my shirt.

“Fucking hell.” I mumble, disconnecting my phone from the charger and looking at the huge list of notifications on my lock screen. They are all alerts of new followers, likes and tags, non from people I know. Non except one.

@ corpse_husband tagged you in a post 

Wait what?

I tap the notification which leads me to a picture Corpse posted two hours ago. It’s a picture of me taken in the living room without my knowledge. I’m an oversized sweater and yoga pants, my hair in a messy braid and my attention caught by the book in my hands. My glasses have slipped a bit down my nose, suggesting that I’m too concentrated on the contents of the pages in front of me that I haven’t noticed.

We started off as friends but it didn’t take long for her to become my best friend. And then she stole my heart. I know you’ll read this eventually, Y/N. So...hi. Love you. 

PS - the sandwiches were bomb 🖤

I’m more than caught off guard. Like a surprise hug from behind, warmth spreading all throughout my body. 

Without a second of hesitation I put my phone down and run to the bedroom door. However, I don’t make it very far considering I nearly run straight into Corpse’s chest as I exit the room. He catches me before I knock him straight to the ground, thankfully.

“Aren’t you a rocket this morning. Where are you headed?“ He chuckles, holding onto my upper arms.

One look at his smile, a single word out of his mouth and I’m melting. I walk straight into him, wrapping my arms around his torso, hiding my face in his chest. He comfortably rests his chin on the top of my head, not asking any further questions until I finally answer.

“Right here. I was heading for you.“ I whisper before I pull away enough to be able to look him in the eyes. “I wanted to tell you how sorry I am. I was being childish and overdramatic and I’m sorry about all I said. I was really upset.“

“It’s ok, baby. I’m sorry for making you upset in the first place. I understand now how much it means to you.“ He caresses my cheekbone with the back of his hand. “I...um...tried to make things right by...“

I push up on my toes, pressing my lips against his, putting an end to his timid stuttering. “I saw it.” I mumble in the kiss.

“Did you like it?“ 

“I loved it.“

“Did you read the comments?“

My heart skips a beat when I hear that dreaded term. Just the thought of reading through the comments terrifies me. I tell myself that some strangers’ words aren’t gonna have an impact on me, but I know they will. Especially since these ‘strangers’ mean so much to Corpse.

I shake my head. He pulls away, taking my hand and leading me towards the living room. “You have to. You’re gonna love them.”

I reluctantly follow him, plopping down on the couch next to him as he pulls out his phone and scrolls through the comment section of the picture he posted. He was right. All these people have said such things about me and about our relationship. Some verified names are also there, sharing their support much like the fans. 

“See, this is why I was nervous. I’ll have to do duels for your attention now.“ He glances at me, leaning in and kissing my temple as he sometimes does so impulsively.

“You don’t do duels when you are already sitting at the throne. Right next to me.“ I once again capture his lips with mine, tempted to never pull away, but also tempted to keep reading the comments.

Damn, he might be right about the duels.

He takes his phone from me setting it aside as he slowly lifts me and settles me in his lap, never letting our lips detach.

Nevermind. Fuck the duels

@susceptible-but-siriusexual  @simonsbluee  @save-the-sky  @hacker-ghost  @itsminniekat  @bi-andready-tocry  @imtiredaffff  @jazzkaurtheglorious  @hereforbeebo  @fandomgirl17  @chrysanthykios  @maehemscorpyus  @loraleiix  @letsloveimagines  @annshit  @i-cant-choose-a-username-help  @enigmaticmaze

#corpse husband #corpse #husband #corpse simp #corpsehusband #corpse husband fanfic #corpse husband fanfiction #corpse fic #corpse fanfiction #corpse fanfic #corpse x y/n #corpse x reader #corpse husband x y/n #corpse husband x reader #x reader #reader #y/n #x y/n #angst #fanfiction #fanfic #love #romance

[frombeyondtheblackhole]

Hermitcraft DSMP Swap AU: Part 5

Etho reached out till he found TFC’s arm Then guided him across the field to a tower by the beach. “We’re going to the top,” Etho explained, letting go of TFC once they were inside. TFC heard the ladder creek with Etho’s weight and could just barely make out the invis particles ascending. He followed. Coming up to the top he was met with a perfect view of the black stone building, silhouetted by the sunset, the lava reflecting golden red and rippling on the water. 

“So what’s all this about?” TFC asked turning to look at Etho’s particles, not like Etho would be able to tell.

“I’m not a hundred percent sure... but I’ll do my best to explain,” Etho rested his hands on the edge of the tower and leaned over scanning the distance for anyone in case they had been spotted... in case TFC had been spotted. “This isn’t Hermitcraft. It is a different server. I have been watching the inhabitants. They didn’t seem like the friendliest bunch of people so I thought it was best to stay out of sight till I... and now you, I guess, can find a way back to Hermitcraft.”

“What do you mean, find a way back? Can't you just-” TFC said as he called up his HUD, pressed the button requesting access to Hermitcraft. The scanner popped up and after a moment of rummaging around in his pockets he pulled out a key card and swiped it. Everything went black for a moment as the transfer began, then the light returned. He was still standing on the tower with Etho and the text on his HUD read “You do not have permissions to leave this server.” TFC scowled and moved to try again but Etho stopped his arm. 

“Don’t bother, I’ve already tried it several times. The server won’t let us leave,” 

“Won’t let us-?” TFC began

“Shh” Ehto cut him off, letting go of his arm as he moved back to the edge of the tower. Someone was moving around in the field below. Etho squinted. It was a man in full netherite with a trident. He had what looked like a gas mask covering the lower half of his face so it was hard to tell what he looked like from here. 

“Who’s that,” TFC whispered

“I think that might be The Warden. From what I’ve overheard everyone is afraid of him, he guards the prison,” 

“So this is a prison?” TFC mused looking back at the building the sun was almost gone now and it stood like a black mark on the luminescent golden water before everything turned gray as the sun slipped out of sight. “Why would they need a prison?” He muttered “Why not just ban rule breakers?” 

“That, I don’t know. Now shh- he’s getting closer.” Etho whispered crouching down lower as if it would make a difference with invisibility.

The Warden came closer to the tower, Etho held his breath. The Warden wandered around the tower and rummaged through some of the chests. Then he looked up. Etho pulled back instinctively, but he had gotten a good look at the man. TFC didn’t move, he just stared back. The Warden looked up with black sclera, his eyes centered with white rings, his skin a mottled green. A creeper hybrid. Like Doc.

Etho moved back to the edge of the tower and watched as The Warden walked around it and waded into the water. There was a splash and a swoosh, then a thud as he landed on the roof of the tower above their heads. “Go go,” Etho hissed as quietly as he could, pushing TFC towards the ladder. 

The Warden swung down from the roof and through the window frame. Etho backed up. “There you are.” The warden said, his voice calm and low, as he locked eyes onto where Etho stood. The Warden summoned a glass of milk in his free hand and held it out “Drink this,” He commanded. 

Etho remained silent, and eyed his surroundings. The Warden was between him and the ladder, how high up were they?

“Drink this or I will kill you where you stand,” The Warden growled.

Alright, that wasn’t happening. Etho turned and climbed up on the edge of the tower.

“Don’t-” The Warden shouted. Etho felt a bolt of pain and his breath knocked out of him as the trident hit him in the back and now he was falling, the ground quickly approaching. In a split second the bucket was out, he landed with a splash, but his knees felt shaky. He had been taken down to half health. 

He staggered to his feet and jumped as another trident stuck in the ground beside him with a thunk. Then TFC was helping him stand and they were running. A splash sounded behind them as The Warden jumped down from the tower. 

“This was a warning! If I ever catch you messing around the Prison again I will hunt you down and kill you till you are completely dead.” The Warden shouted after them.  

---

Grian started pacing. This wasn’t good. 

“Um- this is the Hermit craft server...” Scar said slowly.

“So wait... I moved between servers?” Skeppy said

“Seems like it- Grian what’s wrong?” Scar said, interrupting himself and turning to Grian mid sentence.  

Grian stopped pacing and turned to Skeppy, “I can’t really explain but I may have made a mistake and you need to go back to your own server now.” He insisted.

Skeppy frowned “I mean, I don’t mind,” He really did want to get back to Bad and his mansion “but... how exactly do I do that?” 

Scar raised his brows and looked at Grian. 

“It’s Simple, You just... Um, You... you just... click here, no, here?”  Grian began messing with his HUD, frustration growing on his face. 

“I got it,” Scar chuckled.

Grian rubbed the back of his neck with a sheepish grin, “It’s been so long, I guess I’m a bit rusty.”

“Alright, Call up your HUD,” Scar said as he moved to look over Skeppy’s shoulder so he could read the display as it popped up. “Now click here,” He said pointing, Skeppy did and a server list appeared. The Dream SMP was the only server on the list. “Click that,” Skeppy did “Now swipe your access card.”

“My what?” Skeppy stopped and turned to look at Scar.

“You’re... some fancy new servers use retina scans but... you don’t know what an access key is?” Scar furrowed his brow.

“Hey, of course I know,” Skeppy scoffed. 

“It’s kept in your secret inventory,” Grian said

“My... like my enderchest?” Skeppy trailed off looking even more confused than before. 

“Your secret inventory is a special inventory that only you or an admin can access that keeps items that are related to deep server code stuff. Like access cards that let you into invite only servers you are whitelisted on... I’m not an admin but I know a trick or two, I might be able to access yours,” Grian offered.

Skeppy folded his arms and shrugged “Sure, do whatever.” 

Grian reached out and his eyes glowed purple for a second. His pointer finger seemed to cut through space inches away from Skeppy’s face. He reached in and after some rummaging around he pulled out a very old looking skeleton key. The tear in space sealed back up and Grain’s eyes returned to their usual green. 

Grian and Scar both raised their brows and looked at each other.

Skeppy looked between them “What? What is it?” 

Grian looked at him and pursed his lips “Um Physical key’s haven’t been used by servers since, like, 1.8, and even then most servers had already converted to the keycard system. by 1.9 no one was using physical key’s anymore.” 

“Well does it matter if it’s old if it works?” Skeppy scoffed.

“I guess not,” Scar shrugged, “Give it a try.” 

Skeppy pressed the Dream SMP button on the HUD and inserted the key in the keyhole that appeared. Everything went black for a second before he found himself back standing in front of Scar and Grian, a very familiar message looking back at him from the HUD “You do not have permissions to leave this server.”

“Wait, what?” Grian started flipping Skeppy’s HUD around so he could see the message clearly, “Oh dear. That’s not good. I- I think- Um- give me a minute,” He said, starting to pace then abruptly stopping, his eyes turning purple as he made a tear in the air in front of him, and stepped through. 

Skeppy blinked at where Grian had disappeared. 

“Well you don’t see that often,” Scar chuckled nervously. 

A moment later Grian came back through the tear, his hair rumpled, “Um... We need to talk to Xisuma.” 

“Why, what's wrong?” Scar asked. 

Grian looked at him as his eyes faded back to green and the tear healed itself “The server’s leaking.”

#dream smp #dsmp #hermitcraft #dsmp au #dream smp au #hermitcraft au #hc x dsmp au #hermitcraft dsmp swap au #etho #awsamdude #warden sam #tfc #grian #skeppy #good times with scar #xisuma #watcher grian

[tea-and-spoons]

What happens when... I develop a new food allergy?

Whether this is your first food allergy, or the most recent in a long list, it can still be a rough adjustment and overwhelming amount of change.  But as someone who has gone through this more than twenty times, I promise you it’s not the end of the world.

The majority of this post is related to severe, anaphylactic food allergies, but I’m of course always going to advocate for being careful, and some of this will apply to milder allergies too.  This advice also works if you were just diagnosed with celiac disease, or another condition that makes you sensitive to cross contamination.  I’m going to let your doctor handle the medical side of this, but I’m hoping this post will cover all the other things you need to know!

I made some pretty thorough lists of things to check, replace, or clean to make sure you’re safe from allergens- I’ll put those at the end of this post.  It is a lot- recruit a non-allergic friend to help if you can!

But before I get into the lists, here are some other things I’ve learned about getting a new food allergy.

-Update your doctors, including your dentist.  And also update any emergency info you have around, like your medical ID in your phone.

-Research other names for your allergen and what it might be found in.  Food labelling can be very sneaky, which is Not Cool, but you get really good at reading ingredient labels once you know what to look for.  I would stay away from googling too many other allergy related things though, it’s an easy way to get into a panic.

-Talk to the people you live with.  Hopefully they’re good about it, but they might take a while to understand, or might even be angry and resistant, which honestly is beyond me.  If this is your situation, I am so so sorry.  You deserve to feel safe in your own home, no matter what.  If you can set some ground rules and get people on board even a little bit, that will help, and hopefully everyone will come around eventually.

-You should also talk to your partner, or anyone you might be kissing (or who might be kissing you, even on the cheek.  Hi grandma.)  Their foods, medications, reusable water bottles, and toothbrush are all possible ways you could get sick.  So even if they haven’t eaten allergens in hours, it could still be on their toothbrush and that can be enough to cause a reaction.  This research article (Maloney JM, et al. Peanut allergen exposure through saliva: assessment and interventions to reduce exposure. J Allergy Clin Immunol 2006; 118: 719-724.) found that waiting at least an hour and having something allergen free to eat was the best way to de-poison-ify for someone you want to kiss.  I’ve also heard from other allergists that 3-4 hours is the right number.  So I would ask your allergist what they recommend for you.

(note:  I would like to keep this blog safe and friendly for spoonies of all ages, but if you are in need of more information about dating and allergies, feel free to message me and I’ll send you some links!)

-One thing that surprised me with some of my food allergies was the cravings.  Sometimes I never want to even hear the word “pineapple” again, but especially if it was something like eggs that are more a hidden ingredient, I struggled with cravings for foods I couldn’t have anymore, like French toast.  And I’m not even someone who likes food that much!  So I’m here to tell you that the cravings are normal, and will subside in a few weeks.  It also helps to just not be around things you can’t eat for a bit.  And to look for replacement recipes for your favorites- there’s so much out there, it’s really impressive.

-The other common (emotional) reaction is anxiety.  Anaphylactic food allergies can be life threatening, of course you’re scared!  It is 100% normal to be worried and afraid and anxious and terrified, especially after an allergic reaction.  That response happens to help keep you safe!  But it’s also exhausting, and can get out of control.  My best advice here is to follow the concrete steps you need to be safe, and then tell yourself that you’ve done everything you can, you know what you’re doing, and even if something goes wrong, you know you are prepared.  You can be prepared and careful AND not have to be scared all the time.  There is zero shame in seeing a therapist about this too, they can really help.  (My advice here is borrowed from my lovely therapist!)

And here are the lists I mentioned earlier!  I hope this helps you feel safer and more prepared.  Severe food allergies are a big change, but you got this!

Things to replace:

-Toothbrush (and maybe toothpaste too)

-Any food that is still safe but might be cross contaminated (like flour, sugar, spices, things that go on toast… basically any open containers)

-Kitchen sponges and rags and anything else that gets used to hand wash dishes

-Chapstick and lipstick

-Stim toys that go in your mouth

-Cast iron kitchen equipment

-Cutting boards

-Reeds (if you play a reed instrument)

-Ice cubes, if you have a tray in your freezer that people reach into

Things to clean:

-Kitchen itself, including all appliances and countertops

-Anywhere else food is kept or eaten (such as pantry, dining room, couch, in your purse, desk, locker)

-All cooking supplies (plates, pans, silverware, crockpot, basically everything)

-Potholders and oven mitts

-Pillowcases

-Dish towels

-Doorknobs

-Handles

-Light switches

-Remotes

-Cloth napkins

-Reusable water bottles

-Kitchen drawers that might have gotten crumbs or residue in them

-Retainer or mouthguard

-Lunchbox

-Toys and fidgets

-Purse/backpack

-Writing utensils

-Car steering wheel, controls, and handles (especially if you’re the driver)

-Inhaler, spacer, nebulizer, CPAP mask, and other related equipment

-Oral thermometer

-Face masks

-Phone, computer keyboards, touch screens

-Hand or wrist braces

-Video game controllers

-Any musical instruments you play, but especially if it’s a wind instrument.  Plus the case, and any cleaning equipment.

-Whatever your toothbrush is stored in

Things to check the labels on:

-All your food (what you have at home, and anything new you buy)

-Toothpaste

-Floss

-Shampoo and other hair products

-Hand soap and dish soap

-Deodorant

-Makeup and chapstick

-Medications

-Lotions

-Sunblock

-Pet food (if their food turns out to contain your new allergen, you might want to clean or replace their toys as well.  And a bath for the pet themselves!)

If I missed anything on my lists, please feel free to add on in the replies!  If you need someone to talk to or have questions, you’re welcome to message me.  And I promise this gets easier 💙

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