#it was just constantly telling me all the things I was doing wrong

[inspector-m3]

One Piece headcannons, reader with allergies.

I have a desire to write but the ideas are moving to fast in my head lol. My requests are open and I can write full stories/oneshots not just headcannons. I promise i dont bite :]

CHOPPER

(This one is intended as platonic because, well...bros a reindeer.)

You got incredibly lucky finding this guy, no matter what time you joined the crew. Since chopper is a doctor he definitely feels like a blessing. As soon as he found out about your allergies he started his research (if he didn't already know about it). Finds a cure or a medicine to help with the symptoms and reactions for your allergies. This precious doctor even warns the other crew about what you can't have near you.

In return for his kindness you are now his designated hiding spot for when shit goes down.

LUFFY

He was definitely curious as to why you were constantly taking medicine or having to stay with chopper since you were unwell. Eventually he just outright asked what was wrong with you. He didn't get it at first but once he did he responded with...let's say an interest?

He loudly makes sure that whenever everyone's eating that the food (if you're allergic to a food) is nowhere near you, but let's be honest he probably eats it before it gets even a metre from you, saying something like "I was just keeping Y/ N safe!" when someone complains about their food being stolen. However, if you're allergic to a specific animal or item he makes sure it non-existent on his ship.

NAMI

Just like luffy she makes sure the allergen (the thing you're allergic to) is nowhere to be found. Since you mean so much to her she'd be willing to part with some money to pay for medicines or doctors if chopper couldn't help (luckily for nami thats a rare chance).

sorry this ones so short, I've never really written anything for nami before.

SANJI

If you have a food allergy this man is catering to your every need, making new recipes or even a completely different dish to the rest of the crew if needs be. Oh, you like spaghetti but you're allergic to pasta? Bam, special pasta you're not allergic to, just for you. He can and probably will fight luffy to keep him away from your special food.

If youre allergic to something that isn't food his dramatic ass would probably follow you around in new places to make sure it's not anywhere near you. (and if this gets annoying just give him a compliment, he'll pass out from blood loss and leave you in peace)

USSOP

When you're allergies are bad and it leaves you bed ridden, sniffling or coughing, he'll tell you stories just like he did with kaya. You'll be laying in bed, cursing your allergies while trying to not break your ribs from laughing at ussops silly tales. He always makes you feel much better.

ZORO

He probably didn't even know what an allergy was lmao. Maybe he thought it was some sort of pest (close enough)

If youre allergic to food we already know sanji will be making sure you're safe but zoro is definitely jealous that he can't do anything about it....unless.... if you guys are on a new island and you're not sure if your food has your allergen in it, zoro is the first to offer his help (well, it was luffy first but we all know what would happen).

If your allergen isn't food, just like sanji, he's following you around but he's definitely more of a silent protector compared to sanji. A plant you're allergic to in your path? not on his watch, it's cut down before you can even think of how to get around it.

Let me know if you have any tips or if there's any mistakes!

#x male reader #x reader #headcanon #one piece #one piece headcanons #zoro x reader #sanji x reader #ussop x reader #nami x reader #luffy x reader #tony tony chopper #roronoa zoro #sanji #monkey d. luffy #one piece nami #ussop

[wttcsms]

repeat offender, hiromi higuruma.

pairing hiromi higuruma x f!reader  word count 1.9k  synopsis vignettes of hiromi higuruma's life, featuring his inevitable early-onset mid-life crisis, his disillusionment with the justice system, and how he can't seem to shake you off. content contains law partner's daughter!reader, no curses au, corporate/big law lawyer!hiromi, bratty, always trying to get a reaction out of him reader x just trying to survive the day hiromi, slight age gap (hiromi is 26, reader is 20), eventual smut in later parts, sfw but suggestiveauthor's notes something a bit different; just wanted to test out diff narrative formats lol (and also, this was the closest thing in my gdocs to being finished & i feel guilty for not giving y'all new content)

all the wrong dialogue options were chosen here

Despite the ceiling clearance being so high that it’s enough to make a man of his stature feel small and the fact that despite all the warm bodies in this banquet hall right now, it would still be more of a challenge to bump into someone rather than avoiding them; despite the fact that the air conditioning system must be working overtime since he hasn’t felt the need to shrug off his tuxedo jacket once, despite the fact that he’s free to leave at any time he wants since he’s already gone through the obligatory introductions and the empty pleasantries—

—despite it all, Hiromi Higuruma feels trapped. The walls are slowly closing in on him, and someone from across the massive room is laughing a bit too loudly, and the ceiling, with its intricate crown molding, feels like it’s going to collapse onto him at any second. 

That’s the problem when you decide to be someone you’re not. He’s constantly on his toes, always having to look behind him, always trying to make sure his mask isn’t going to slip. Fresh out of law school. Top marks, top of his class, actually. As expected, as always. 

Hiromi is used to setting the curve, so it doesn’t take him long to learn how these circles operate. Laugh at the right jokes, order the right drink, find the right people to praise, the right suit to wear — he’s good at figuring out the right answers to everything. 

“The party’s never going to end, so if you feel like leaving, you might as well just go now.” 

Hiromi turns to face the source of that sentence, only to have to glance downwards, taking in the sight of you. Glossy lips, long lashes, slinky gold gown clinging to the curves of your body. He swallows. Hard. 

You smile. Sweetly. 

“Before you go, though, you mind getting me a drink from the bar?” You point to the bar that’s across the room, the area Hiromi just left, one old-fashioned in his hand. 

The first wrong thing Hiromi says is, “It’s an open bar.” 

Your shining smile barely falters, but he catches the subtle curve of a frown almost taking shape. 

“Do you really think I could fight off that crowd?” You give him a faux pout, one that only emphasizes the pretty shape of your lips. 

Looking like that, he thinks you wouldn’t need to fight the crowd to get the bartender’s attention. Everyone would probably be clamoring for yours, actually. He doesn’t tell you this, though. Instead, he says, “Like you said, I might as well just go now.” 

Boo. This stranger is no fun. What a waste of good looks, you think to yourself. Taking in the way his body fills out his suit, the tall bridge of his nose, the sharpness of his features — maybe it’s for the best that he’s no fun. You’re not sure how you would be able to keep your cool if he actually was interesting. 

“Don’t just paraphrase. I remember saying that after telling you you should do that if you feel like leaving.” 

He wonders what you’re doing here, at one of the biggest charity galas sponsored by the big law firm he’s going to be joining shortly after his graduation. There’s no way you’re a law student; only a select few final year students were invited in the first place. He can’t fathom you being someone’s plus-one; looking like that, he certainly wouldn’t be able to let you out of his grasp. 

He doesn’t ask you anything, though. He doesn’t compliment you, or say anything that’s on his mind. Instead, he hands his half-empty glass to one of the catering employees walking by that’s collecting dirty glasses, and he tells you, “I’ll be heading out now. Good luck with the bar.” 

It certainly wasn’t the right thing to say, but being a genius comes with some pressure. He figures he’s allowed to give out a few incorrect answers every once in a while.

apex predator 

The click-clack of your four-inch heels making impact against the tiled floors of your father’s law firm serves as a signal to everyone that they need to seek immediate shelter (read: cower in the nearest coworker’s office) and try not to make direct eye contact with you. 

When the boss’s daughter comes to visit, everyone’s on edge. 

Everyone except the new hire. 

Hiromi Higuruma is by no means slow on the uptake, but he’s clocking in the most billable hours out of everyone. Very rarely does he get a chance to take a break, and he doesn’t plan on wasting what few precious minutes of a break he can get on hiding from some brat whose single defining characteristic is sharing the same last name that’s plastered on this skyscraper of a building.

When he passes you by in the hallway, you catch a glimpse of him from the corner of your eye. Broad shoulders, slim waist, and a familiar slope of a nose bridge you’ve seen before. You almost falter in your footsteps — almost. 

bucket list idea: fuck in an elevator

There’s something intimate about being in the same elevator as someone else.

When there’s a handful of people, it’s casual. Simple. Someone who forgot deodorant, someone who’s running late for work, someone who just burnt their tongue trying to drink their coffee too fast. All of it is mundane. 

Being in an elevator where it’s just you and him — you haven’t decided yet if it’s a gift or a punishment. 

“My father loves the work you’ve been doing,” You’re the first one to break the silence. You can only hope that he’ll be the first one to break the distance between you two: a respectful four feet apart. 

Hiromi clears his throat, straightens his tie. He’s staring straight ahead, right at the shiny silver of the stainless steel doors. “Thank you.” 

“Don’t thank me. I’m not the one who said anything about your work.” 

The corners of his mouth almost turn up at that. He fights the urge to smile. 

“Then thanks for the honesty.” 

“Do you like that?” You ask him. 

“Like what?”

“Honesty?” You ask it innocently enough, but when you give him those eyes, and make your lips form that pout, everything comes out sounding sultry. He’s convinced you could be reading his most recent M&A deal out loud to him and make it sound like you’re reading an erotic romance. 

“Well, I’m a lawyer.” He finds that he has to bite back his smile when he’s around you. He stares at the slowly changing numbers on the screen. The two of you entered from the parking garage, and the elevator’s making its steady ascent to the thirtieth floor. 

“So that’s a no.” You muse.

Hiromi makes no comment.

whatever pays the bills, i guess

Hiromi Higuruma, unlike every other undergrad trying to get into law school, does not take… creative liberties when it comes to his personal statement on why he wants to become a lawyer. Potential medical school students lie and say they want to “save lives” because “living with six-figure student loan debt for the first decade out of school and then making crazy bank afterwards seems like a good trade-off” just doesn’t sound very awe-inspiring, does it? 

In another life, he thinks he’s probably a defense attorney. Representing the Little Guy. Keeping alive his desire to uphold the principles of justice and that the wrongfully accused receive fair representation. Even with the odds stacked against his client, he’s certain that he’s good enough to win their case.

However, the world is unfair. Doing the good thing rarely pays off. Being a good person doesn’t get you very far, either. One of his former classmates was such a bright, kind girl. Passionate statement of purpose, too. She applied to all the same law programs as Hiromi and got accepted to exactly zero of them. 

Hiromi got into every single one, and his statement of purpose was honest, straight to the point, and damn-near clinically cold.

I need a competitive environment that takes pride in its intellectual rigor, but I have no desire to pursue medical school just to spend a decade in college and residency. Law school seems most appropriate for my needs.

who hired the intern?

Hiromi doesn’t know what you do around the firm, just that you’re constantly here. 

Even when you’re not physically present, he still finds traces of you lingering everywhere. The scent of your perfume that sticks to the elevator’s walls, your now-empty medium sized iced matcha latte in the trashcan of the breakroom, whispers of your names when his colleagues are in the mood to gossip, the click-clack of your heels that he can hear from inside his office even though his door is closed.

He can’t tell if you’re just inescapable or if he’s constantly subconsciously seeking you out. He doesn’t want to know the answer.

What he does want to know the answer to is why you’re sitting on top of his desk at seven in the morning, your medium sized iced matcha latte in all its green glory (this is the first time he’s seen it full and not as an empty plastic cup in the trash). You’re wearing a fitted white button down with a gray wool skirt that will have the HR manager doing a wide-eyed double-take when you walk past her. Your legs are crossed, and Hiromi scolds himself for noticing. 

He focuses on your face instead, upset to see that you’re still doing that unfair move of yours — that pout, those eyes. 

“What are you doing in here?” Hiromi manages to get the words unstuck from his throat. He’s not even sure how you got the keys to his office, and then he remembers who your father is. 

You smile brightly. 

“My dad says I need some ‘resume-boosting’ activities, and how convenient is it that the firm is looking for an off-cycle intern?” 

How convenient, indeed.

“Still doesn’t explain why you’re sitting on top of my desk.” During your chirpy exclamation, Hiromi manages to pull himself together. He’s getting a few steps closer to you. He’s not going to sit behind his desk, not yet, but his approach only serves to bring you two into closer proximity. If you stretch your legs, the pointy tips of your stilettos will brush against the fabric of his trousers. 

“Well, every intern at the firm is apparently assigned a lawyer to work under. Y’know, to be a mentor.” 

He can’t decide if he likes or detests where this is going.

“And,” you continue. “Dad only wants the best for me. It’d be, like, kind of suspicious to be working directly alongside my father, though.” Yes, Hiromi muses. Because getting a law internship at one of the most prestigious firms during your undergrad is certainly not suspicious at all. “So, the next best thing would be the so-called prodigal lawyer that everyone can’t stop praising. How convenient is it that you’re able to watch over an intern for the semester?”

“Very convenient.” Hiromi raises an eyebrow. “Are you going to get off my desk now? I can’t imagine you’ll be able to learn much if your back is going to be facing me when I’m sitting at my desk.” 

“Whatever you say, sir.” You hop off the desk, gently tugging your skirt down in place. He keeps his eyes focused on your face the whole time.

#hiromi higuruma x reader #jjk x reader #jjk x you #one shot #drabble #fluff #imagine #jjk headcanons #hiromi higuruma x you

[miley1442111]

Hi love :) I was wondering if you wouldn't mind doing a little something for Derek Morgan? Where reader and Derek have a similar dynamic to Chandler and Monica from friends, maybe something similar to that one scene where Monica gets called high-maintenance and can't stop thinking about it and Chandler comforts her by saying that whilst you may be a little above the average maintence level (or something around those lines, it's been like 2 years since I last watched friends 😅), he's just like, "it's okay, because I like... maintaining you?".

Btw I'm obsessed with your fics I just finished reading all your Aaron fics in one go. Thank you so much my love! <333

omg i love this ideaaaa so much (Truth be told I've never watched friends once so i did in fact have to look this scene up on youtube)

i hope you enjoy!!

a/n: intended for fem or male reader, so imagine what you like:)))))))))

summary: your not high maintenance, right?

pairing: derek morgan x reader

warnings: general criminal minds topics, mild insecurities

High-maintenance. You weren’t high maintenance, right? 

It had been a throw-away comment from earlier in the week, something funny David had said. Though it stuck with you, making you question if you were high-maintenance or not. 

Was it high maintenance to ask your boyfriend to drive you to the gym? To ask him to get you a coffee? To ask his opinion on things? To ask him to help you with something?

You were going over it constantly in your head, so much so, that you’d decided to change. 

Him getting you coffee turned into you getting him coffee. Him helping you on cases turned into you practically ignoring him unless you were alone, or at home. Him giving his opinion on anything you’d usually ask him to give his opinion on, turned into never asking his opinion. Him driving you to the gym turned into you walking there and back alone. Maybe that one was a mistake… 

—----------------------------------------------------------------------------

You sat in the passenger seat of his car, the rain had ruined your hair, your active clothes sticking to your body, and his voice droning on in a lecture of why it wasn’t safe to walk home at 11pm alone. 

“I mean I seriously don’t understand baby, why can’t you just let me pick you up?-” he was worried. The kind of worry that made someone pissed off. 

“Why can’t I just let you pick me up, Derek?” You mocked. “I fucking wonder why.” 

“You wanna’ tell me something baby?” He cocked his head to the side, glancing at you quickly. 

“No,” you mumbled. 

“What is wrong with you this week? We’re barely spending any time together, you won’t let me drive you anywhere, you’re acting like I’m not there at work-”

“I’m trying Derek, alright. Give me a fucking break,” you huffed.

“What are you ‘trying’ to do?” He asked, genuine confusion coating his words. 

You just sighed and left the car as he parked it outside your shared apartment. You stood in the elevator, his jacket around your shoulders, feeling silly. Why had you let him pick you up? Oh yeah, three guys were following you. Probably the safer choice, though it didn’t make you feel any less childish. 

You’re so high maintenance, a voice in your head nagged and you slipped his jacket off and handed it to him. 

“Baby, can you just talk to me?” he asked, pulling the emergency stop button and turning to you. 

“About what?” You started the elevator again, wanting to ignore whatever issue he thought you two had. 

“Baby, if I did something-”

“You did nothing,” you reassured him with a sad chuckle.

“Then what’s wrong?” He asked, taking your hand in his. “Please talk to me.”

You looked down at his hand, a sad smile on your face. “It’s nothing.”

“Tell me anyway,” he chuckled, pressing a kiss to your cheek. 

“Do you think I’m high maintenance?” You asked, scared of his answer. 

He smiled down at you and sighed. “You’re a little high maintenance.”

“Oh…” you sighed. So Dave was right. Everything he’d said was right. Derek probably finds you so annoying. He probably hates you.

“But I like getting to do the maintenance. I like taking care of you,” he smirked, pressing a kiss to your cheek. “I’m glad you let me take care of you.”

“What?” You stared at him and he pressed a kiss to your lips. 

“I like maintaining you,” he repeated and a smile spread across your face. 

Who listens to Rossi anyway?

—----------------------------------------------------------------------------

criminal minds masterlist :) - requests are open! :)

#criminal minds #criminal minds imagine #bau team #criminal minds fandom #criminal minds fic #criminal minds x reader #spencer reid #derek morgan x y/n #derek morgan #derek morgan x reader #derek morgan fanfiction #david rossi #jason gideon #elle greenaway #aaron hotchner

[stylesharrys]

the box | part three [boxerry]

//

“I don’t mean to be nosy, so tell me if I’m overstepping. But as Mary’s keyworker, I handle all invoices and health care… and I know you make a lot of money from the fights. Why do you keep her here when you could afford something more lavish?”

She hopes it doesn’t come off the wrong way — she already thinks it’s incredible what he’s doing for his family. But she can’t help but wonder. 

“Honestly?” He asks, and Y/N nods. “Because of you. She loves living here and she loves you. Whenever I visit, it’s always Penny this, and Penny that. You’ve got no idea how at peace I feel with her living her, because of how incredible you are with her.” 

Y/N’s not sure when the tears began to well in her eyes but when they begin to fall down her cheek, Harry is quick to wipe them away softly with the pad of his thumb. 

They’re both aware of how intimate his little act was, so he’s quick to sit back in his chair and clear his throat. 

“As for the money, I save most of it for my future children and stuff. I don’t want to do this forever, but now Sam’s gone… I don’t think I’ll ever be able to walk away from it. It’s all I’ve got left of him.” 

Everything he says is loaded to Y/N. Future children, her late brother. She’s not sure if she pegged Harry for the type to want children, but she constantly has to remind herself that she doesn’t know him, and every time they speak she learns something new. 

The mention of Sam makes her heart hurt. And in the past two weeks, she’s begun to adopt the same mindset that Harry already has. Now she’s part of it, she doesn’t think she could let the club go. Much like Harry, it’s one of the only things she has left of Sam, too. 

They sit like that for another hour or so, just talking and learning more about each other. Harry shares stories about Mary, and Y/N listens intently to the mirage of the older woman’s life. 

Y/N is about to ask another question when their little story time is interrupted by two male paramedics knocking on the door of Mary’s room. 

Y/N’s the first to stand, offering a polite smile as she shakes both of their hands. “Hi, I’m Y/N, Mary’s keyworker. This is Harry,” she gestures to him, “Mary’s grandson.” 

The two paramedics introduce themselves as Darren and Olli as they lug their equipment into the room with them. Harry sits back to allow them their space as they wake Mary from her light slumber. 

He watches as Y/N softly explains what’s happening and that she needs to be checked over by the nice paramedics. They’re all thankful that Mary doesn’t kick up a fuss about it, and allows Darren and Olli to gently examine her hips. 

“Been a while since a strapping young bloke has had his hands all over my hips… let alone two of ya.”

Harry closes his eyes in embarrassment as Y/N stifles her laugh. No matter how long she’s been caring for Mary, she never fails to give Y/N the giggles. And it doesn’t help when she mumbles something along the lines of ‘I should fall over more often’, under her breath. 

Olli gently pushes pressure on her left hip. “Is that giving you any discomfort, Mary?” 

She shakes her head. “Oh, absolutely not, petal. You can keep doing that.” 

“Gran!”

READ NOW ON PATREON ONLY :)

#patreon exclusive #harry styles imagine #harry styles smut #imagine harry styles #harry styles x reader #harry styles x you #harry styles oneshot #harry styles angst #harry styles fic #harry styles #harry styles fluff

[forestgreenlesbian]

.

#feel like my relationship with my younger brother is changed completely forever not to be dramatic lol but i am sad #we used to b very close but he has kind of. found his faith again and gone full missionary christian which like. i knew meant the dynamic #was doomed lmao but actually acknowledging it makes me sad i feel like i'm grieving for the friendship we used to have even though #it is literally a me problem i think from his perspective he doesn't think anything has changed. but i feel weird about everything #also his new gf is nineteen and he is. almost 25 and i am the only one who feels weird about it like i know she's over 18 but! idk i can't #tell if i'm being overly cautious or if my gut instinct is right. my sister & her husband have a similar age gap but they met when they wer #both over 30 so like. it didn't feel weird. and i didn't feel comfortable actually seriously talking to him about it apart from the first #time he mentioned her over facetime (he went to another country to do mission stuff & met her there) so like an idiot i've just been #making jokes about the age gap becausee like. thats always been our thing lightly bullying each other lol but he blew up at me and said #i've had nothing positive to say about her since he's been back home and that he thinks i hate her and i'm out of line for constantly #implying he's creepy for dating someone younger. idk i felt like such a freak idiot horrible person about it. it completely blindsided me #bc yes the jokes were coming from a place of idk how i feel about this situation so i'm going to rely on the humour-based communication #we have always fallen back on as a safety thing but i guess i was wrong or the dynamic shifted or something anyway it's all fucked #& everyone is just telling me i feel weird out of some?? misplaced kind of jealousy thing?? because i'm 'losing' my brother to his gf lol #which does not feel right at all he has dated so many other girls and i have never had a problem it is literally the age gap like i haven't #even met this girl i'm sure she's very nice! i just worry about her being nineteen!! jesus. and yes maybe i do feel some resentment around #a brother younger than me who seems to be able to live his life with zero difficulty whilst i'm stuck being this unemployed loser who ruins #literally ever friendship & relationship ive ever had but i think thats ok right like i can't help feeling that. i don't fucking knowwww #am i just projecting all these sad feelings about our friendship dying onto his new relationship or like. am i right to be genuinely #concerned she's six years younger than him and still a fucking teenager!!!!!! i don't know

[licorishh]

Most people really don't seem to understand that friendship is a two-way street.

They expect you to wait on them hand and foot as they rant about and constantly pour on you either their issues or their passions and when you finally have something you'd like to talk about you get a "Man that sucks :/" or a "Cool" in return.

Find somebody who doesn't do that. Then you'll have your best friend.

#i know i ramble sometimes and i'm extremely grateful that my best friend puts up with it :') #but see then in return i do the same for her because it would be completely unfair for me to expect her to act like a wall for me to talk a #or when i wanna show her something and i can tell she's being polite and it doesn't personally strike her fancy I MOVE ON #and she does the same for me and we have way frickin better communication and we have a frickin rad friendship #it's give and take #and also can we bring back the idea of being able to work through some things on your own? #like i am ALL FOR having a support system that can encourage you when things go wrong but some things can be solved on your own #i shouldn't be bearing the burden of figuring out your life for you you know? #i'm absolutely willing to help but if you're just going to spend all your time complaining to me and never ever take my advice #then there comes a point at which i'm literally just acting as your therapist and that's not how friendships are supposed to work #i've become kind of the designated therapist in a lot of friendships throughout my life #and it is exhausting constantly being complained at (sometimes over very minor things) #only to have that person or people COMPLETELY ignore your advice every single time you try to give it #that's not friendship my dude that's using me because you just want someone to complain to #like i said. support system good. treating your friend like an emotional punching bag to let out your problems 24/7 very very bad. #like when i was feeling completely unlike myself and irritated and frustrated for three dang years straight #i didn't really talk about it much because i knew it wasn't the kind of thing advice was going to fix #so i wasn't in the discord servers every two seconds “MAN I REALLY JUST DON'T FEEL GOOD :///” #because when other people do this to me there comes a point at which i'm like “WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO DO ABOUT IT” #like i've given you all the advice i have and you have taken absolutely none of it nor have you taken any action on your own #so now i'm just here to make you feel better about yourself and that's really not my job #emotional support is necessary. patting you on the head when you refuse to do anything to better your situation is not. #tl;dr people who refuse to do anything to better their situation other than complain to ME about it 24/7 drive me nuts #and it drives other people nuts so please don't do it to anyone #don't bottle up your emotions but also don't let them come crashing down and drown everyone you know #just because you can't be bothered to put ANY effort forth to contain them #emotional regulation is attractive~~~ #society today has built such a culture of “it's not YOUR fault and if you cry about it hard enough someone will fix it for you” like no sir #sometimes it IS your fault and sometimes you DO need to take responsibility #and if it is your fault then absolutely no one but you is obligated to fix it

[lloydfrontera]

the webtoon may have left out a lot of things but they did yassify the orcs which is the funniest thing to me right now

*sigh* they did yassify the orcs <3

now i want to see what they'll do with the sirens and whether i should be excited or worried lmao

#hey i got an ask #Anonymous #the greatest estate developer #tged #also. can we talk about the elephant on the room. #listen i may be totally be wrong about this and i would love to hear you guys' thoughts about this but. #doesn't it feel a little. weird. this thing the webtoon has about making muscular women look overly scary or rough? #like i feel it's gone under the radar because most of us just went 'oh hell yeah muscular women that shit rules let's go!' #but..... i think that wasn't... actually what the artists had in mind when they did. that. #like for example mellica. she's great i love her top tier character design. but look at her. and tell me the way they presented her #doesn't look like a set up for the audience to go 'oh super muscular woman is scary ha ha'. be honest. #now to be fair! all the elves look buff! like they actually look like people who train and fight and do archery constantly! they look great #so i can pass it off as a maybe a little clumsy attempt to give us more buff female characters it's fine whatever #but then we get to the lady ella bit. and uh. well. #how do say this.. it feels. mean-spirited? sorta?? a little mean?? #not even because i was really looking forward to this arc i'm a big girl i can swallow my disappointments like an adult and all that #but it feels like the joke there was 'ha ha man in a dress looks weird isn't that funny? ha ha men are attracted to him that's hilarious' #especially because they went out of their way to make javier look overly burly and buff while wearing the dress #i joked about it but doesn't it feel weird?? we know javier is a pretty guy he's muscular but he's also lean and almost... delicate looking #when wearing his normal clothes #he's a pretty guy! in the novel he could easily pass as girl with no issues! #and instead the webtoon decided to make him look so big and buff he was almost ripping the dress because of how burly he is? #like clearly the joke was 'this guy can't pass for a woman and it's funny that no one seems realize it and even think he's beautiful' #and they even went with the 'i respect your fetishes' joke which. oh boi. #so i'm worried about what kind of jokes they'll make when we get to the mermaids which are described as really big and muscular #even in the novel. in which there are some illustrations that i still haven't decided how much i like tbh #and maybe i'm exaggerating! maybe i'm being paranoid! maybe i'm making a big deal out of nothing and seeing mean jokes #out of a simple gag with no ill intentions behind it! #but i just. think it's weird. and not really all that funny. and i wanted to acknowledge it cause i felt uncomfortable not saying anything #so i'd like to know what you guys think. i think i need more perspectives on this before i say something dumb(er) lol

[hexplaything]

every time i need to explain my feelings to someone i get brought back to every single time my ex fought with me over expressing my feelings and all i do is shake and cry

#even thinking about telling people things and being vulnerable makes me nauseous #i just dont do it now #i can't bring myself to #and it's like. it makes me feel worse bc i know it's such a disservice to everyone else. #i know everyone else isn't my ex and they probably won't react how she did #but i just can't find it in me to take that chance #im so scared of someone else actually reacting the way she did. and that'll just confirm for me that it was all my fault and it's something #that's wrong within me #im terrified that itell get confirmed that im just too much #i feel like at this point im just constantly fighting for my life. on fucking edge and paranoid as all hell #i cant believe u all put up with me being severely mentally ill in the middle of hornyposting #does it not Kill The Vibe?? #good girl speaks

[girlscience]

the past few weeks I've been feeling basically zero dysphoria and yet the amount I was thinking about my body didn't decrease even slightly

#imagine not having a constant soundtrack of #'i have boobs. do i hate them? do i like them? what are they feeling? they are moving. nipples. touching things. i hate it. i like it.' #and on and on and on. i do think my dysphoria as a whole has been on a constant decline since I finished puberty #and I really don't know how I feel about that #like technically it should be a good thing... but I don't know how to feel about my body otherwise #and also what does that mean about gender for me. i don't really get the point of being a different gender if i am chill with my body #like..... literally no one is ever going to look at me and not see woman #no matter what i do. #whatever vibe some people have that just makes people know they are somehow different #i do not have that. i get lumped into VERY classic woman no matter what i do #i have chopped all my hair off and don't shave and don't wear makeup and half my clothes are mens and i never wear dresses #it almost makes me want to ask people what i am doing wrong #like i don't think it's bad to be associated with women. i don't hate it #but there are people who are like 'even when i was fully femme other people could tell there was something different about me' #i straight up don't think anyone has ever once thought that about me. i genuinely don't think people even see me as a gnc woman #is it the way i talk? the way i carry myself?? my face????? i don't Know #that was. not at all the point of this post #basically i'm feeling less dysphoria and it is just as discomforting as feeling dysphoria #and i am so tired of constantly being aware of my body #and i wish it would stop but i don't think it ever will and it makes me want to cry

[polaraffect]

#damien.txt #so listen. i've been kind of fucking depressed for the past 3 months ish #and im going to tell a story related to that in the tags so. if u continue to read. judgement free zone for me pls okay? #cool cool so im like. Really bad abt taking care of my self & my surroundings when im depressed #esp bc like. im in school & work so. literally ALL of my energy goes to those two things #and i will go. weeks upon weeks not cleaning my room #not throwing out trash. which i am AWARE is gross. but truly i would get home and pass tf out and then wake up and #start the day again. like i just truly was not engaging it in any way #anyways. so there's this library book that's been sitting on my nightstand for around a month ish #and ive also been using it as a place for other nightstand things- putting cups on. glasses at night. etc. #well. so i get an email that this book is due back tomorrow. so im like 'oh i should put this book in my backpack' #and i lift it up..... and fuck. there is literally spotty mold ALL. OVER. the back of this fucking book #i guess one of the cups i left on the night stand leaked liquid onto my nightstand and then it soaked into the book or something #and the book didnt move for a Month so like. it's had forever to just sit there and mold over. #and fuck. fuck! i was having such a good night before this too. #now im like.... what the fuck do i even do #i probably just need to go turn it in & pay the fucking expensive fee but like. fuck me. i wanna cry #it always feels like one thing on top of another. like things just are constantly going wrong in my life #and like i Know this is not. the biggest deal in the world. but it just feels like such a dumb fucking thing to happen idk. #anyways. gonna cry abt that and. i guess figure out what im doing with it tomorrow /:

[soupkiddo]

category 4 autism moment at work

#everybody tells me to do different things all at once and also there are 700 loud college students around me #and i am constantly doing yhe wrong thing and getting told yo do something else #hng #eating a bowl of soup so i dont just walk off into the lake

[m00ngbin]

I always think I'm dying cause some new awful thing will pop up and then I wait a few days and I'm not dead. Like the thing is still happening but I'm not dead and that's ok.

Most recently I've been getting like super dizzy and there's been something wrong with my brain and I get like. I want to say eye spasms? Idk what they are. It feels like I'm really tired and I've been staring at a phone screen all day like all the time. Even when I just wake up. And the top and front of my brain always feel wrong, and sometimes they hurt but it's not like PAIN pain but it is pain. Almost like a when someone puts a light in your eyes sort of feeling. Anyways the point is that I have been preparing for death or at least a significant amount of cognitive decline for two weeks and so far there has been almost nothing. Except that I struggled to read a few words I would have normally been able to read just fine but it's ok cause I can still read and walk around and I haven't started losing control of going to the bathroom

#i am actually so tired of there being something wrong with me #i just want to be normal and happy and healthy #idk why thats so hard #why do i have to constantly feel bad that's just not fair #talking about suicide past this point lol #im not joking when i say that stuff #ACK I FORGOT ABOUT THE ENDOCRINOLOGIST IM GOING TO ACTUALLY FUCKING KILL MYSELF #going to doctors always makes me feel like shit and that might actually be it for me #what if i literally died after the endocrinologist visit #there will be no answer i can guarantee that #she will have no fucking clue whats going on #and i will feel so fucking horrible that ill spiral and kill myself #one of my worst fears atm is that she'll be the kind of doctor that looks at genitalia #i will throw the biggest fucking fit anyone has ever seen mark my fucking words #if i have to undergo that sort of thing #anyways going to the doctor always makes me feel like the biggest fucking liar even though im not lying at all #she just doesnt believe me and i can tell and it makes me feel like maybe shes right #cause the pain isnt usually happening right then #so i just think that i must be faking it EVEN THOUGH EVEN MY MOM FUCKING SAW IT #AND PEOPLE HAVE SEEN ME FUCKING FALL OVER CAUSE MY KNEES SUCK ASS #i want a knee brace or a cane but im not always in pain so i think “do i really need it?” YEAH SOMETIMES I DO

[liinos]

saw a reel of some kids at an orchestra camp that looked suspiciously like the one i was forced to go to one year... worst experience of my life!!!

#when i tell you i think there are things stemming from that experience! my parents were actually so wrong for making me go... #my mom CRIED bc i kept insisting that i didn't want to do it bc i a) was never That into music especially not CHAMBER music #b) knew that i would not know anyone and would be stuck in the middle of nowhere with people who were already friends from previous years #c) was only even given an audition bc my teacher knew the staff and their other oboist wasn't able to go that year and they needed one #d) WAS THIRTEEN AND WANTED TO SPEND THE SUMMER WITH MY FRIENDS #i do actually think it caused me real psychic damage attending that like the fact that Everyone was already friends with everyone else... #i came with no friends and i left with no friends! and when i tried to talk to the other girls in my cabin i could tell they were like... #why are you trying to be in our friend group. there was a girl who was nice to me but i was not her friend very clearly #also i was soooo out of my depth there it was Rough for me fr and like i Knew i was out of my depth i had no illusions about that #i knew i would be which is why i was like yeah this is Not for me #i still cannot get over my mom crying about this like this wasn't some great life changing opportunity... #my parents really have and always have had these Ideals they place on me bc They think xyz would be nice #or they wish they could have done it like ??? okay why does that have anything to do with me #my dad keeps being like well *I* want you to go to grad school in mtl bc i like mtl and i want to visit 😁 #like haha you're not funny actually 😁 first of all not a single damn thing is stopping you from going you can drive there whenever you want #secondly one of us does NOT want to be in mtl again 😁 and that one of us actually lived there before #also the way my parents constantly visiting me pissed me off to no fucking end... I'M NOT THE PROBLEM CHILD #worried that i just stay in my room like ???? okay??? but if i went out you'd flip bc what if it's unsafe. i LIKE staying home #and i HATED mtl so no way in hell was i going to go do shit especially not at night in the WINTER are you insane #like yeah i was super depressed. that was unrelated to me staying in my room like my room was my Space #anyway all this to say i'm setting the fuck boundary this time around like i actually dgaf i'm an adult and again #not your problem child so if you could stop projecting that onto me just bc HE fucked up when he was in school.... #parents will be like why can't you be independent and then literally not let you be i 🫶🏻 it #i do also hold it against the boy child and my dad for this 'you can only go to schools within a 6 hour drive' #which is only a rule my sisters and i had and maybe if the boy child wasn't a fuck up i couldve not had it but you know #he ruined any chance of that but my dad when i was applying for college was like oh it can be anywhere :) and then was like lol no #and then was like well for grad school you can go anywhere and then when it was brought up last time went lol no :) #so i'm going to have to bring lol yes :) energy cuz...

[krutomu]

It’s okay and normal to get pissed off at your friends. It is normal and okay!

#I can’t be specific on this cus idk who follows me #But idk I just get a bit pissed when one person is exclusively nice to their partner #And has to constantly say things for their partner #And do things for their partner #Because their partner won’t just tell me if I do something wrong it has to be made everyone’s business so that someone else can tell me #I don’t like it when someone gets special treatment Al the time and I just get told to kill myself in a friendly way!! #And everyone can call me a twink too because it’s funny to them I guess #Idk i just #i just don’t like this guy and I keep trying to but I just don’t like him. #Apparently I make him cry all the time because I hurt his feelings but he doesn’t tell me #I hate to break it to you but you have to spell shit out to me #Im angry so I’m going to work out. Also I’m having more fucking hunger pain ugh #Idk if anyone’s reading this far but If you happen to know what it means when you feel hungry but when you eat you feel nauseous and you ha #Vertigo #lmk lmao

[kerorowhump]

#keroro #i love this. she is me. i can live my unbridled amounts of cute aggression towards him THRU HER #i literally need to do this irl #like i just skimmed ep 64 bc i was curious about this trauma switch thing and ive never wanted to grab him and whack him around more #in an affectionate way not because im mad at him oh no. i understand him so deeply. i feel him. i know his most inner psyche. #and he inspires unrecorded levels of senseless violence in me #me in my little ignoramus bubble writing a 4 pages dissertation on his character anyway bc like. i get him ok #his deep seated sense of guilt that he's constantly fighting against. that he needs to repress and deny in order to function. #his fear of abandonment. fear of never being enough. not being able to make up for it. for himself. thats why hes self sacrificing #his selfish childishness that comes from not having been allowed a lot in his youth. taking friends for granted in his past but knowing - #you dont fit in with them. constantly apologizing for yourself. taking space. too much. self indulgence. because friends is s scary concept #and yet one you couldnt survive without. letting them walk all over you. denying your anger. your fears. crawling back to them with a smile #at their feet and biting time because what you really want is friends. company. but you think you don't deserve it. deep down. #maybe u dont. your worst reminder the friend you love. and if they ditch you it's deserved. you don't need them (you do) #why am i rambling!!!! he has ruined me. if im wrong dont even tell me bc i prefer this version in my head anyway #*charlie voice* look at me. psychological trauma up to here #im not saying growing up poor with a father that shames you for your interests and ''disciplines'' you made him selfish but. no yes! #i am saying that. bc i know how it is. growing up with friends that have a lot that u can never afford. u feel guilty just being with them #ok we strayed a lot from the og post which is just me saying I WANNA PUNCH THIS GUY SO BAD (he is me) #keroro gunso

[catboyr]

love this cycle of does my roommate hate me nah we're okay does my roommate hate me nah we're okay does my roommate hate me nah we're okay its so funny i am having so much fun

#just kidding i hate it i want to have a normal brain and not constantly worry abt whether people hate me #i think shes mad at me though i just dont know why. they're just being very cold and like. biting #just. i try to do so much (<- set up the entire kitchen. clean all the time cause they're not the most hygienic which i get but its tiring) #and still the littlest things i do wrong feel so so big #but i refuse to tell her whenever something bothers me #the furthest i got was telling them it bugged me a little when they asked me to change our new cat's name for their boyfriend. which like #yeah my people pleaser side is like of course ill do anything but the precedent set by everything just revolving around emotionally #accomodating her boyfriend. who's my friend too but now i just feel like we're on opposite sides all the time #idk man its weird. im gonna try and make it better #sol.txt