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#it still gives me The Feels TM
darstellung · 8 months
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doodlerh · 1 year
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some lil flower inspired guys!!
#h doodles#character design tag#oc#elmud#neiri#ITS 1AM WHSDGHSD IM SO TIRED BUT I STILL WANNA DRAW THEM#their lore is rather Confused atm but like all i got is uhh#neiri was cursed to be trapped in the Dream Realm (tm) and every time they appear in someone's dream they are promptly forgotten#if they can be like. remembered. their curse will be broken and they'll be freed back into the living world!! yippee!!#they think being fun/interesting makes em memorable so they have this >:3 facade when meeting new dreamers#doesnt work obv; neiri is secretly extremely lonely </3 creep behavior but they make sock dolls of their dreamer friends#and keep them in a knapsack that neiri always carries around#ENTER ELMUD. a knight who gets exploded in battle and is in a coma for probably idk more than 10 days and neiri meets him in his dreams#they bond and neiri tells him about their curse and elmud promises to remember them asking neiri to keep visiting in dreams till he does#a year straight of dreams later neiri (heartbroken) gives up; elmud begins to realize he isn't dreaming anymore and is like hm! didnt i#used to dream a lot? idk what they were about anymore tho (which is the first step to remembering neiri)#eventually elmud comes across some forget me nots growing by a remote stream and is like GASP???? NEIRI#and neiri's curse is broken!! and elmud finds em at the stream's endpoint and they hug and cry and hug and hug and hu#elmud then takes neiri back to his home kingdom and neiri becomes the royal mage's apprentice and they and elmud obv develop feelings#for each other but they are both way too shy to say anything#homies who kiss :') there was like an original plotline where elmud is actually a magic user bc he can perform floromancy (a la maude)#and seeks out a mage (neiri?) for guidance abt his powers and gifts em flowers he creates :') might be an au who knows#im not entirely satisfied bc i havent gotten to draw their full outfits yet BUT its late and tomorrow will be busy </3#VERY RARE INSTANCE of me drawing faces abt the same size. once in a lifetime#fun fact neiri was cursed by the royal mage of many centuries ago which they discover in ancient texts in the royal library#neiri was 17 and lived in like an eternal time loop so they didnt age </3 or really mature tbh they never visited anyone older than like 20#so. ZERO wisdom gained SDFHHSDF#also neiri is afraid of falling asleep. and also elmud is afraid of waking up#every day theyre like oh thank god my boy bestie is still here#okay. wel. good NIGHT GOOD NIGHT
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coldvampire · 3 months
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anyway as soon as i pry myself off this couch im gonna share some screenshots of bg3 protags on my sideblog. just gotta like. reach the desk first.
#all i can think about is the shelves im gonna get installed here over the next little bit fdghj#yall dont understand its so hard to keep things clean and brain friendly when you just dont have anywhere to put stuff.#hellish#& then i get overwhelmed and turn into a massive bitch when i try to get it under control fdgh#instead its been like. 2 straight days of dopamine i fucking swear?? my body probably definitely wouldnt let me do this for a living#(my hip is screamingggg dfghgjj) but actually if i could & if i could work in a team then yeah. ykw i enjoy it.#organization go brrrrrrr#i dont think she was expecting me to work that fast either but ive been like a feral animal. skittering over clutter.#finding Spots for Things#okay i lied the flood was actually beneficial in one way to me specifically.#estranged father just forgot a Bunch of tool sets here & ive claimed them now fdghjk#that nail gun is MINE#she suggested i look out for an actual tool chest/bench thing (ykw the ones with wheels and stuff) for everything and i havent been that#excited for anything in months fdgh tools are expensive alright. too bad he took the table saw.#i dont talk much abt my Masc Hobbies as i call them lmao no real reason to but hoooboy i love to Build Things#give me that ikea desk ill have it done in an hour or less every time#maybe trade school is still on the horizon for me gfhj always wanted to Weld Stuff i think id be good at it#as much as i fuckin loathe yard maintenance i was a real garage sooooo bad its not even funny#shame i wasnt just inherently expected to know car stuff tm i feel like i would have loved it too#scarrier to learn on your own later in life especially with a lease vehicle but ill get there eventually#anyway yeah bg3! new mods. new ocs#have not done much with them yet but they Exist and theyre pretty
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momentsofamber · 29 days
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I'm gonna state a controversial Danganronpa headcanon, you ready?
Peko is an aro lesbian demigirl and Kuzu is a gay trans male but they're both attracted to each other in a consang way that has nothing to do with sex, gender, or orientation and is purely based on the partnership that formed in their upbringing.
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skibasyndrome · 3 months
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I'm about to throw all my academic values overboard to get this fucking article done
#linguistics are my enemy#not because I don't like the subject#I'm just........ so much less at ease with this than with literary sciene oh my god#I'm so glad I can mostly focus on lit in the future but let me tell you these few linguistics articles I have/had to do have really brought#me to my limit#and I thought I was already fed up and not giving a shit when I did that one article in summer... oh I had NO IDEA how much less of a shit#was capable of giving!!!#the thing is.... I think objectively I'm still? idk not the worst I could technically be doing#like there ARE people who straight up... idk don't even try to have a research question or who don't read more than a handful or articles b#t ugh#I like academic writing so much and I love putting in the work and I love actually getting into the reseach and finding the most important#texts and writing a balanced and well researched article but ugh..... I just feel like I keep reaching my limits with linguistics#and this time is worse than the others because this topic is SO FAR from being standardized and all I can do is ???? mention that there's#like a hundred different models and then just??? choose one and go with it? which is so fucking unsatisfying#but I swear... everybody in this field is just making up a new model that's just different words for the same thing (and not in the /normal#way that science /always/ is about making up a new model. no. this time they are very unnecessarily making up new models)#ugh. everything about this sucks#I should've chosen a different seminar I should've chose a different topic and I especially should've written more of this in summer when I#technically still had a little more time#sorry for blowing up your dash with complaints this festive season lol. I am just having a time (TM) with the different writing tasks on my#hands and I need a place to vent I guess#simon.out.#sounds so drastic btw I'm not about to cheat or plagiarize or anything but I'm about to do so much less of a proper work than I ever wanted#to allow myself to do. cherrypicking and all.
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shout out to thomas from ghosts for yoinking me out of a panic attack before it could really get going
#was shaking and trying not to cry and floating somewhere on the ceiling#then friday im in love came on the radio and reminded me of him doing his stupid little dance and it made me smile and calmed me down a bit#but i gotta give myself credit for not panicking at the panic too much and feeding it more#time was when feeling the thing i felt from first year tm would've sent me into a week long spiral#feels so stupid tho all it was was my volunteering manager asked if i wanted to start doing a longer shift#when im already struggling doing two measly hours a week and nothing else like jfc#but that's cos im not on my adhd meds which make life yknow tolerable and im gonna try getting back on them next week#and i also don't wanna start anything else bc i wanna change my name first so it's not quite so complicated#hahaaa it's already complicated and confusing and frustrating as all hell#but ik if i can just be patient and take these few months to figure stuff out it'll be so much better in the long term#im getting support for the gender tm and I've made so much progress in a month#i still feel guilty and ashamed bc im not actively job hunting or doing more volunteering#and like im just making excuses to let my anxiety win when ik i can cope with it#but i can't handle going into another situation where im misgendered and uncomfortable with my name#im at the end of my tether with it and i need to figure it out#wahoo#mine#vent#in good news tho im pretty certain im a dude more sure about pronouns and have a potential name im thinking of!!
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I think a boy version of Tenko Chabashira would still be a misandrist (no, not a misogynist) and be like, aggressively supportive of women and constantly threatening "degenerate males," and having an obvious crush on Himiko and still gets jealous/protective about her except he thinks (or is convincing himself) he is just being a "good example" of a man and a caring "friend" because of course he wouldn't ask Himiko to be his girlfriend, that would go against his beliefs and make him just as bad as all the "degenerates"... :'(
basically just like girl Tenko, but the self-issues (with the attraction to Himiko and how Tenko sees themself) and language against males present in a slightly different manner.
Also like girl Tenko, could be read as cis or trans and makes just as much sense.
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gothiclovebug · 5 months
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ohhhh i see now. i am mentally unwell.
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lisbonsteresa · 1 year
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oh concrete stoop we’re really in it now
#yelling and screaming this is so PERFECT to me#tm#he's dying on the inside but he's trying so so hard to be supportive because he just wants her to be HAPPY#(even if he can't figure out how to say he wants her to be happy with him)#and she is SO --#(gorgeous she looks so pretty teresa lisbon just give me a chance)#she's so thrown?? the way her face falls a little before she says goodnight and then she tilts her chin up to kind of save face#and then HER face as she walks away because he's just NOT taking the bait#it usually takes just the slightest hint of a date - hell; that another man is interested - and he's (jealous) got SOMETHING to say#and she was clearly expecting it - the don't start and the cloth napkins and the hint of a smile with both - she's expecting SOME banter#SOME comment and he just....doesn't give it to her#the whole episode honestly; he's been keeping his thoughts/hurt feelings to himself and she's been waiting for him to say something#that's what they do; how they've worked for so long and now something's off kilter to her while he's trying to do what he thinks is best#(you think you know what's good for my life--)#and now she's worried and he's sad and i have to admit i'm having a great time#(do you think she's going to start questioning if he still has feelings for her? do you think they're going to have a big blowup#once he does something kind of petty after trying to play it cool for so long DO YOU THINK THEY'LL HAVE A BIG DRAMATIC CONFESSION SCENE#the you in question is the 4 people who read my 876 tags i'm kissing you all on the forehead thank you for bearing with me)
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the new clocktower we're getting eventually...
why is it giving me the 358/2 flashbacks
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savage-rhi · 6 months
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I'm very much a, "fuck yeah and fuck you, I don't need validation! I'm me, cunts!" kinda fella, but sometimes I could use support.
#today i fucked up by reactivating my fb account which i haven't done in 2 yrs just to check on some folks id been sending good thought to#place is depressing everyone is miserable and everything feels fake and my mind is like#LOL this is why we left bitch byeeee#so i deactivated again went to work and idc what anyone says there are folks like me that can and do feel the energy and emotions coming of#people and it can fucking suck especially when so many are disregulated so i got a sensory overload and boss was nice enough to let me take#a bunch of breaks today and even scream in her office cause She Gets It (TM)#the weather is rainy and cold i'm getting so many fibro flares idk how i'm moving anymore#ive missed so many days of work already and it's not even fully winter yet i still have my job and im thankful i have an understanding team#but that doesnt pay the bills im still trying to find a way to pay for that doctor appointment coming up#graduate courses began for college and i think i'm gonna be okay but damn did they throw too much info all at once at me and that made#my adhd brain go WELL SHIT#ive been feeling incredibly lonely and not wanted in so many spaces that im struggling to even communicate with the few that i know do#love me for me and nothing else im trying so so so hard to keep being there for people and to keep loving#people that need it cause i don't ever want another human being to ever feel as miserable and unwanted as i have felt#but im also tired because i feel like thats all anyone ever sees me as just this being that can take their woes away and make them feel#amazing and i love that i can do that and listen to so many traumatic stories and help folks process that trauma my boss and many throughou#life have told me i have a gift for healing people and a vibe to me thats different than most and it feels good being around me but today i#just felt like people keep taking and taking and taking and i dont expect anything back thats not who i am id rather give than receive#but damn it i just wish someone could just give me the biggest hug in the world dont even have to say a thing just hold me and be present#and hold space for me to just feel weightless id cherish that more than anything in the world right now#on a positive note...#my dinosaur vo stuff got traction im getting a new cosplay put together i havent done that in 4 years i got to pet a wild deer i made#a coworker laugh so hard his juice went out his nose and my boss peed a little#im slowly taming another wild flock of turkeys and i got a bag of my favorite takis the guacamole flavor#i got a lot to be thankful for and i acknowledge it#but damn it im tired#thank you for coming to my Ted Talk rant and rave#if you made it this far: you're an incredible human being and i love you#please go treat yo self to something nice and know i love you for you
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tzarina-alexandra · 1 year
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I know that's very immature of me and stuff but honestly I understand the impulse to Disney-fy stuff aka make it all a (contrived tbh) happy ending etc
I know the point of tragedies is to be sad etc but sometimes I'm just but what if they all survived and reconciled etc etc etc etc please I need it
😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
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a-wolf-in-bat-wings · 10 months
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Listened to Évidemment with subtitles for the 1st time & I-
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#.MA'AM????#.The. Contrast. between the tune & the lyrics.#.Ok but the music is accurate tho. It has that dramatic tune that is like It is what is it & this is the harsh true and you know it#.But I also think there's still a hopeful tone to it Like Ok So we know this don't we? So Let's keep going. Let's keep fighting.#.Let's continue even if this is how it is or how we feel & what we do. Please take better care of yourself. You are aware of this -#.- and how reality can be. So darling Let us promise one another to keep goin. It will get better. We have each other ♡#.I'm singing this to you for you to see/ understand me & express myself & for you to be aware of what could be/happen/how it can go#.May you give me this chance? Could u promise to me you're gonna be true & kind to me dear? Can u give me the benefit of a calm mind?#.I stand here vulnerable in front of you. Do you understand darling?#.Also by the way. Did I give it a good try trying to represent France? :)#.LIKE.#.[EVAPORATES]#.LADY THIS IS TOO MUCH FOR ME. DO U UNDERSTAND HOW THIS HIT ME LIKE A TRAIN.#./pos#.Crying screaming melting exploding#.MAYBE I AM OVERTHINKING THIS BUT AAAAAAAAAAAA PLEASE PLEASE PUT ON SUBTITLES#.Maybe I missed writing sth here I don't know but I tried (THIS IS WHAT I UNDERSTOOD/THOUGHT OF THE SONG)#.It's got that emotional & dramatic & melancholic french TM tune & lyrics#.Bordering nihilist.. if that's the appropiate word#.But like. Oh- of course / obviously / Évidemment I let myself get hopeful again. When I know how it is. When will I learn? Kinda thing#.AAAAGGGHHRDAAAAARRRRRR#.This didn't have to go so hard AND so low on the list#.ANYWAY IT'S 1.50 NOW. I WAS PLANNING ON JUST WATCHING THE VID ONCE BUT I GOT CURIOUS ABT THE LYRICS#.Oh what if I put on the subtitles :) “#. - o h.#.AAAAYYYYY MUJER COMO ME TENÉS ENGANCHADA.. Y CADA VEZ MÁS.. ❤️#.Ok enough. I'm sorry. I know I'm annoyingly posting way too much abt her <///3#.This is gonna keep me up at night#.I just wanted to watch her dance gracefully with the bg lights & the microphone cable#.Ok DONE. I reached 30 tags LMFAO ... BYE BYE..
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trainingdummyrabbit · 8 months
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:) i have fought the fossils.
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niuxita21 · 2 years
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Ana, I’m sorry. I didn’t want you to feel displaced. I’m the one who’s sorry. I’m acting like Pablo with you. I got jealous! Mother jealousy.
#madre solo hay dos#ana servín#mariana herrera#shitty screencap posts (TM)#yet another numbered list of all the things I loved about this scene:#1) mariana being secure enough in her position within ana's family that she didn't feel like she had to walk away while ana and ceci talked#and later chimed in with her own anecdote about mother/daughter sex talks (with ana rolling her eyes at that lol#I want to think that her affection for mariana (whether romantic or platonic remains tbd *laughcry*) has mellowed out her feelings for tere)#2) that little co-parenting moment with both of them being scandalized by finding ceci like that (for different reasons obvs but still)#I like how this gives the idea that it's totally normal for mariana to be involved in parenting stuff with ana's other kids :))))#3) mariana apologizing for making ana feel displaced (despite the fact that ana never once verbalized it)#and ana apologizing right back AND mentioning specifically the situation with pablo#she spent the whole episode listening to mariana talk about how annoying it was for pablo to act like that#so I like that ana had enough self-awareness of her own actions AND of mariana's feelings to realize she was doing the same thing#ugh I just love everything about the way these two are written wrt their interactions with each other#4) ceci's 'it's like I too have two moms just like regina and valentina' :))))#it's official all the kids on this show have two moms hashtag confirmed#5) my friend recently alerted me to a certain phenomenon called 'bisexual lighting' and... well... *gestures to the second cap*#presented without commentary *cough*#(yes I know the first cap is out of context but I'm IN LOVE with the way mariana looks at ana there sorry not sorry)#anyway icb there's only ONE episode left what will I do with my life then?? where will my serotonin and will to live come from????#ALSO episode 8 is titled 'there's no escaping fate' kfhjkdhkjhkj show PLSSSSSS what r u doing to meeeeeeee
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toytulini · 8 months
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thinking about masks again and i really should jist bite the bullet and buy some god damn reusable respirators to have. like 1 or 2. i have a couple particular ones in mind but. just. ugh. the logistics
#toy txt post#like my face isnt That Weird shaped to be like an actual problem but i feel like small jaw/chin + Big Nose + smallish head is like.#just slightly enough outside their Normal Person Head Shape to make masks tricky to fit? idk#can you bitches just give me a beak already ffs#anyway#thats more stressful w reusable respirators vs like. disposable ones that i already figured that shit out w#and im looking at. flo mask. i like the low profile shape and how discreet it is compared to the other reusable respirators#but someone i trust the Mask Quality Opinions of on twitter awhile ago pointed out that its a new company and theres a bit more of a risk of#them going out of business or smth and then you wont be able to buy more filters#vs brands like. 3m and dentec etc that are like. More Established(tm) ig? and like#common for industrial use? so like idk even if they went out of business tomorrow its like okay well theyre common enough someone will#prolly step in and make replacement filters still right?#idk#all things seem to have pros and cons#for one#the industrialness of dentec and 3m make their websites godawful to use and do not feel like i should be buying from them#like goddamn i feel like i need to be a contractor putting in an order for 100 of them to buy from them its Weird#hostile#also i think the person who said that on twitter was either. naomi wu @realsexycyborg or someone she retweeted or a bit of both#like she retweeted and then added her own thoughts. cred there#also saw someone who printed custom vinyl to decorate her reusable respirators and it looked cool as shit#but also like. that seems like it would make it even harder to clean?#guh. i should just. get one and try it. maybe itll seal better and have that magical perfect fit and not be That hard to clean
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