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therenlover · 3 years

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Therenlover’s Official Fanfic Glossary!

Hey hey hey! This is the place where you can find all my up-to-date fanfics linked nicely, read about what projects I have upcoming, and learn what requests I’m taking at the moment! Cheers!

This post is massive so, for the sake of your dash, everything is under the cut

A NOTE ABOUT REQUESTS!

I will do my best to fulfill any requests I get while my ask box/requests are open! That being said, I cannot promise every request will get done, and that if they do, they’ll be done in a timely manner. I’m currently working on a long-form project that needs a lot of time and energy to come out consistently, so unless I’m doing a writing event most of my writing juice will be focused on that. That being said, if you want something ask! The worst I can possibly do is direct you towards someone else who might be able to write what you want if I cant.

If I choose not to do your request based on personal preference (it makes me uncomfy/I don’t write for the character at that time/I don’t feel I can write what you want/etc.) I will do my best to contact you and let you know! That being said, if you think your ask got buried/forgotten, feel free to message me again and let me know, but please tell me when you message me if I should be looking for a prior request.

Characters/Fandoms I will write for currently

💙 = I’m Currently Super Inspired To Write For This Character

Marvel/X-Men

Bucky Barnes

Loki

Peter Maximoff 💙

Pietro Maximoff

Helmut Zemo 💙

Hank McCoy

Ralph Bohner 💙

Vision

American Horror Story

Tate Langdon

Kit Walker 💙

Kyle Spencer (Pre- and Post- Death)

Jimmy Darling 💙

James Patrick March 💙

Kai Anderson

Fallout 4

Nick Valentine

Hancock

Star Wars

Poe Dameron

Armitage Hux 💙

Kylo Ren/Ben Solo

Finn

Han Solo

Assorted/Random

Diarmuid Ua Duibhne - FGO

Cu Chulainn/Cu Alter - FGO

Warren Lipka - American Animals 💙

Enjolras - Les Miserables

Grantaire - Les Miserables

Gabriel - Supernatural

Imagines - REQUESTS CLOSED

Songs From Musicals Y/N Would Sing To The Evans

Characters: Tate Langdon, Kit Walker, Kyle Spencer, Jimmy Darling, James Patrick March, Kai Anderson, Peter Maximoff

Rating: T

How The Evans (+ Quicksilver) Would React To Yoplait’s New Gushers Yogurt

Characters: Tate Langdon, Kit Walker, Kyle Spencer, Jimmy Darling, James Patrick March, Rory Monahan, Kai Anderson, Peter Maximoff

Rating: T

Would The Danny Bunch Survive A Holiday With My Family?

Characters: Laszlo Kreizler, Alex Kerner, Niki Lauda, Andrea Marowski, Ernst Schmidt, Helmut Zemo

Rating: T

Headcanons - REQUESTS CLOSED

Modern! AU Armitage Hux Boyfriend Headcanons

Zemo With A Well Dress S/O Headcanons

Zemo Getting Jealous Headcanons

Oneshots - REQUESTS CLOSED

Marvel/X-Men

Helmut Zemo

One Last Night In Madripoor

Synopsis: Baron Helmut Zemo is a lonely, wanted man looking for some fun, you’re a piss-poor bounty hunter in search of a connection before leaving your life of crime behind, and fate has brought you together at a party the likes of which has never been seen before. You only have one night left in Madripoor, so why not take a chance?

Rating: 18+

Word Count: 4200~

Still Some Catching Up To Do

Synopsis: As a member of the criminal underworld, people walk out of your life all the time. Some are killed, others kill themselves, most get caught and only a couple get out of the life unscathed, disappearing into the world never to be seen again. Very few walk back in. So when your supposedly incarcerated ex-lover, the Winter Soldier, and the Falcon waltzed through your door and made you murder your boss, needless to say, you were surprised and more than a little bit pissed.

Rating: 16+

Word Count: 6800~

Nine Years Starved

Synopsis: It had been a little over nine years since Helmut Zemo lost his family, his country, and his sanity. Nine years since his last kiss. Nine years since he felt like a human man. Finally, he was ready to start over again, but first, he had to pay his penance back where it all began; Novi Grad. That’s when, by the grace of the fates, he met you.

Rating: G

Word Count: 7000~

Daddy Dearest

Synopsis: Not everyone gets lucky enough to go from being a broke college student in New York to being the sugar baby to literal royalty, but not everyone is you. Most people would be worried about messing things up or losing him to someone else, but you knew he would never find another baby just like you. Besides, you knew exactly what to do to keep him wrapped around your little finger. He may have been the daddy, but you pulled the reins.

Rating: 18+

Word Count: 8000~

In Fleeting Touches & Airy Sighs

Part One Part Two Part Three Part Four

Synopsis: As a wanted man, Helmut Zemo spends most of his time jumping from place to place in the hopes of avoiding a trip back to prison. Unfortunately, that means he can’t always be home in your arms. When he is, though, in the rare moments of calm, you’re reminded of just how worth it it’s been to wait, even if that wait was only shortened by the arrival of your enemies.

Rating: 18+

Word Count: 35,700~

Two Bodies In The Rain

Synopsis: It was raining the day you finally had to admit your feelings to Helmut. You hated to tell him the way you did, under the grey skies as your blood pooled below you, but at least you knew, in the end, he had seen the real you, even just once. That was enough.

Rating: T

Word Count: 5600~

Rest

Synopsis: Living life on the lam with your escaped super-villain lover means things rarely slow down enough for a real rest. When the exhaustion starts to take its toll on you, though, he knows exactly what to do to ease the pain. He may not be a good man, but he’s a good husband when it counts.

Rating: T

Word Count: 3200~

American Horror Story

Jimmy Darling

Red Nights In Jupiter

Synopsis: At the end of another long day, you fall into bed with Jimmy Darling. The men you served throughout the day don’t matter then, nor do the coins in the mason jar by the door, or the women scheduled to attend Jimmy’s next Tupperware party. No, in that quiet darkness it’s just you and the man you love, bone-tired and happy to be home. Who could ask for more?

Rating: 16+

Word Count: 3000~

James Patrick March

Heartsick

Synopsis: When you fall ill, James is given a forceful awakening about how he’s been neglecting your needs and what he must do to prevent harm from befalling you again.

Rating: 16+

Word Count: 3700~

In Sickness And In Health

Synopsis: Normally people don’t have their wedding and funeral on the same day, but you and James don’t quite have a normal relationship, do you? Besides, you wouldn’t wanna go any other way.

Rating: 18+

Word Count: 5500~

Fallout 4

Currently Empty

Star Wars

Currently Empty

Assorted/Random

Currently Empty

Long Form Works/Series

Young Artist!Zemo AU

Chapter One: The Boy With The Easel

Synopsis: About a month into your first semester at Novi Grad’s top university, you finally meet the strange young man that you’ve taken to calling “easel boy” in the back of a bookshop. From a distance, he always seemed cold and aloof. As you get to know him, though, you realize things aren’t always what they seem.

Rating: T

Word Count: 7000~

Till Forever Falls Apart (A Peter Maximoff/Reader Series)

Chapter One: Welcome Home

Synopsis: As if getting thrown through the multiverse, trapped in an attic (albeit a cool one), mind-controlled to manipulate his grieving sister, and subsequently dragged out of Westview “for his own safety” by the FBI wasn’t enough, Peter Maximoff has now been shipped off to New York to live with a glorified baby sitter like some tragic orphan in a comic book until they find a way to get him back home. Things are not always as they seem, though, and this change might just be for the better.

Rating: T

Word Count: 2400~

Chapter Two: The Doctor Is In

Synopsis: Peter’s first few days in his new home are mostly uneventful, so he decides it’s the perfect time to dust off his running goggles and steal some shit. The building with the massive circular stained glass window seems like a great place to start! People with buildings that lavish are usually rich and weak, so what could possibly go wrong?

Rating: T

Word Count: 2800~

Chapter Three: It’s Always Been You

Synopsis: After a month of adapting to his new universe, Peter Maximoff can confidently say that he likes his new life more than his old one. Sure, he misses home sometimes, but he’s been far too busy flirting with his new roommate to spend time crying over the things he’s lost. Everything is smooth sailing until a strange journal in his roommate’s study leaves him with more questions than he knows what to do with. Now he’s on a mission to discover who he’s really living with before she has the chance to turn against him.

Rating: T

Word Count: 8600~

Chapter Four: Before You Go

Synopsis: Peter, after days of contemplation, has realized that part of him loves Y/N no matter what she is or what she’s been through. Unfortunately, he can’t find her anywhere. When she finally returns home with the intention of leaving again, Peter realizes it’s his last chance to tell her how he really feels. Will he succeed, or will he fail to be fast enough once again?

Rating: T

Word Count: 4000~

Chapter Four And A Half: Gimme Swayze

Synopsis: Now that the issue of Y/N leaving is out of the way, and Peter has finally kissed her, he falls into the motions of learning how to love someone for the first time. It’s easier than he thought it would be.

Rating: T

Word Count; 2600~

Cakes For The Evans: A Blogging And Baking Adventure!

Kai Anderson’s Disaster Cake

Hey you! If you’ve made it this far down the list, thanks for supporting me as an author! I’ll be linking my AO3 here. I post everything there shortly before I post it here, and there are some older fics there you might enjoy along the way! It’s also easier to drop comments over there and I keep them open for non-members, so give me a shout if you liked what I wrote!

I love you all, you make me so happy, and without you support I would never be motivated to write! Cheers!

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shedobewritingalittle · 3 years

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As The World Caves In

Pairing: Steve Rogers x Stark!Fem!Reader

Summary: Steve deals with the loss of his wife after the Snap.

Rating: R?

Word Count: 3.3k

Warnings: Grief, depression, feelings of loneliness, death, graphic depiction of a death

A/N: hi yes I wanted to get this out before TFATWS got out. I have never liked the ending Steve got in Endgame, so I wanted to write a new one for him!

Steve would like to say that he lost his wife like everyone else did that day.

He would love to say that she turned into ash like the rest of his teammates. He would love to say that they had some tear-filled goodbye before she turned into nothing. He would love to have that hope that might be able to come back.

But he can't.

Because she actually died that day in Wakanda. Right before his eyes.

It had happened after Thanos had tossed Steve aside. Y/N had charged at the Titan, angry at the purple being for hurting her husband. He caught her in mid-air, his golden gauntlet shimmering in the sunlight as it wrapped tightly around her throat. Steve had scrambled to stand up, his eyes on her.

Y/N coughed and sputtered, her face turning colors as she kicked, her fingers trying to pry the large gold covered fingers off of her throat. And while it felt like hours for Steve, it had only been seconds. Seconds. Seconds he had held her in their air, seconds she had suffered as the Titan cut off her oxygen. Thanos had smirked before tightening his grip, a sickening crack filling the air. Steve couldn't breathe as her body was tossed towards him. It seemed to move in slow motion, bouncing when it hit the ground.

When her body finally came to a stop in front of him, her head lolling to the side as the cloud of dust settled. Steve still had hope somehow. He prayed to the Lord above as he looked at her, hoping that she was somehow still alive. Blood vessels had burst in her eyes and blood trickled out of her mouth. There was a darkening bruise on her throat, her neck was bent at an unnatural angle. Steve had been unable to move, unable to breathe. Within an instant, she was gone. His wife, the love of his life, ripped away from him in mere seconds.

And then his friends and teammates turned into ash all around him.

The worst moment of his life was when he watched his wife die right in front of him. The second worst is having to tell her brother that she was dead.

After Tony had come down the ramp of the ship, Steve had ran over to help him down that last view steps and over to Pepper. Stark told Steve that Peter was gone and in that moment of silence that followed, Tony's eyes scanned the small group of survivors for his adopted sister. Tears sprung up in the man's eyes as he looked back at Steve. The Captain's throat constricts with emotion, tears brimming in his eyes as he just nods, unable to get the words out. Pepper ran up in that moment, wrapping her arms around Tony just as tears rolled down his face.

Y/N is the only one they actually bury. Her funeral is a quiet affair, with only the remaining members of their team and Pepper in attendance. The couple had never talked about what might happen or what they would want if either of them died. Tony tells him that she would want to be buried next to their parents, so she is. He makes sure his baby sister has the best coffin money can buy, the best headstone-everything. Her funeral is the last time Steve and Tony talk to each other.

Steve gets an apartment she would have loved. It's right around the corner from the restaurant where they had their first date and a few streets away from the cemetery. There was those big windows that Y/N had always expressed fondness over. The apartment also had built in shelves that lined one wall of the living room area, which had been another selling point for him. One day Steve hoped that he would be able to fill them with her many books and tchotchkes, but now they stood empty, the shelves gathering dust. Her collection of novelty mugs weren't in the cabinets, no they were still wrapped up in newspapers within one of the many boxes. He had planned on unpacking all of the things that had once filled their shared room at the compound, but the boxes stay in the second bedroom, all piled up in the middle of the room. He couldn't find it in himself to go through all of her old things, didn't want to be bombarded with emotions and memories.

That first year is the hardest. Learning to live without her tears him to shreds. Steve hardly sleeps, hardly eats. He spends a lot of his time alone, dwelling over what he could've done differently. Natasha tries to reach out to him, but Steve distances himself. He tells himself that he needs to do this alone, needs to try to get through it by himself. Y/N always feels like she's just out of his grasp and he prays and begs to have her back with him. His prayers go unanswered.

Natasha appears outside his door on the one year anniversary of Thanos's snap and Y/N's death, holding a bottle of vodka in one hand and Asgardian mead in the other. They sit together in the kitchen and drink as vigils and memorials take place around the world. For the first time, Steve talks about how much he misses his wife. The two heroes talk all night about each person they missed, both of them wondering aloud how were they supposed to live without them.

By the end of the second year, Steve is getting used to living without her. He hates it. He hates how much that ache in his chest has lessened. He hates that he can see a picture of her without a lump forming in his throat. Steve is able to talk about her more and starts a grief support group. Sure he sometimes wakes up and hopes she's there, but that's getting less and less frequent. Steve's afraid that his memories of her are going to slip away from him, terrified of forgetting her.

So he starts to draw her. He's desperate to hold onto every memory of her, so he fills up page after page, sketchbook after sketchbook of nothing but Y/N. The drawings aren't perfect, but he is able to cement those memories in his mind. Steve wants to make sure that he can remember her face without having to study a picture. So when he remembers something about her, he puts it onto a piece of paper. Y/N on their wedding day. Y/N when they were on the run and she fell asleep in the Quinn Jet. Y/N brushing her teeth early in the morning, her silhouette lit up by the almost golden bathroom light. Y/N the first day they met.

Natasha sees them once when she stops by to see him. One of the sketchbooks is left open on the table and she sneaks a peek when Steve goes to the other room to get a sweater. There on the page in incredible detail is a sketch of her best friend with tears in her eyes, her mouth open in shock. She doesn't know that this is the face she made when she learned that Bucky had killed her parents and Steve knew. Natasha looks away, her cheeks burning. She feels like she saw something too personal, too raw, and she shuts the journal before Steve returns.

When the third, fourth, and then fifth year rolls around- well Y/N has been gone longer than they were together as a couple. Steve has gotten used to her being gone. He's able to walk past the room holding all of the boxes without stalling. It gets easier to talk about her, easier to share stories about her to his group. He still misses her, it's just easier for him to live now. His wedding band never leaves his ring finger, needing to have a part of her with him always. Steve still loves her and he doesn't think he can ever love someone as much as he loves his wife.

And then Scott Lang reappears.

Steve wants to reverse what Thanos did, wants to bring back his friends even if that means he cannot bring back his wife. That ache in is chest returns as they put together their heist plan. Steve feels like there's a ghost following him around while he's back at the compound. His shoulders feel heavy again and he tries to put on a brave face as the people around him get hopeful. He tries to be happy, knowing that he will be getting his friends back and fixing what had happened, but he can't help but be upset.

Steve gets to see her when they go back.

It's after he knocks out the younger version of himself. Steve is standing over himself, breathing hard, and holding Loki's scepter tightly in his hands.

"That is America's Ass." He comments, looking behind him before back down to the unconscious man. He needs to meet back up with the others so that they can-

"It definitely is." A familiar voice calls out from in front of him. Steve stills, his breath catching in his throat before he slowly lifts his head. There she is, standing before him with a smirk on her face. Y/N is dressed in her navy blue suit, her hair messy from the battle she just went through. Her face is dirty, her lip split and there is a long cut across her cheekbone. His mouth goes dry and he's suddenly tongue tied, like he was when they first met.

Steve remembers how nervous and awkward he was when they were first introduced to each other. Y/N gave him a million dollar smile and just like that, he knew he was a goner. Steve had stumbled over saying his name, which had then made her laugh-God, that laugh. That laugh had made him warm all over, made butterflies swarm around in his stomach. And in the past five years, those butterflies had been dormant and now, now they're wide awake.

"You're not my Steve." Y/N announces as she walks towards him, studying him. Steve's heart is beating fast and he wants to reach out and hold her close, wanting to tell her how much he loves her. My Steve. God, he misses her. He misses everything about her.

"How can you tell?" He asks, a tiny smile appearing on his face. Y/N chuckles, taking seeing two Steve's surprisingly well. But then again, she had just got done fighting aliens and a literal god so he supposes that things have been weirder.

"My Steve won't even look me in the eye. He blushes when I look at him. When I look at you...you just look so sad. That's how I know you're not Loki." She answers, stopping in front of him. Steve studies her face, taking in every little detail because he knows that this is the last time he'll see her.

"I-I'm that easy to read, huh?" Steve retorts and she laughs again, nodding. God, he misses that sound. He misses her so fucking much that it makes his chest ache. Y/N's smile falters as she looks at him, watching as his smile drops.

"I'm not going to pretend what is exactly going on here, okay? Obviously you are going through something and it's pretty clear you are on a some type of mission." She tells him, motioning to the scepter in his hands. Steve looks down to his hand before looking at her. He knows that she should be calling for back up because by the way people keep speaking through her comm Y/N must know that things are going south.

"I'll bring it back, I promise." Steve replies and the smile returns to her face. Y/N glances down to the unconscious man on the floor before looking at him.

"I know you will. I never saw you, new Steve. And don't worry, I'll make sure you don't choke on your tongue." She teases, gesturing to the passed out version of himself. Steve's smile returns to his face as she continues, "But I do expect some sort of explanation when you come back."

"Of course. I'll be back before you even know I was gone." Steve says, wanting to say so many other things that he knows that he just can't tell her. He opens his mouth again when her comm once again crackles to life. Y/N's eyes widen and she gestures for him to leave. Steve's mouth snaps shut and he nods, quickly walking away.

Tony would later tell Steve when they're in 1970 that he started crying when he saw his little sister.

When his teammates return on the battlefield, she isn't among them. He knows she won't be coming through a portal, but some part of him still holds out hope for some reason. Yet, there is no sadness inside of him on that battlefield. No, rage has pushed all of that sadness aside, filling him up completely.

When he fought against Thanos and his army, he did so with every ounce of strength in his body. Steve wanted to avenge the death of Y/N, wanted to kill Thanos for what he did to her. Steve has never felt so angry in his entire life. He wanted to be the one who ended the Titan's life. He ignored the large gash in his arm and tore through aliens.

And in the end, it's Tony who takes out Thanos. He is the one who avenges his baby sister's death, but the price he pays his high. And Steve has to watch another Stark die.

He feels so guilty that he is alive and both of the Stark siblings are gone, both of them buried side by side, right next to their parents.

There is just so much death in his life, so much damn loss. And he's tired. Steve is exhausted. He hoped that bringing back his friends and the half of the universe that had disappeared because of the Snap would make him feel better, but it hadn't. No, instead that hurt has returned with full force. His chest feels like its about to cave in on itself, like his ribs piercing his lungs and heart-God, everything seems unbearable. All he wants is for the earth to open up and swallow him whole.

And then, he is reminded that he has to return the stones.

And while every single part of the journey is noteworthy, he saves returning the scepter for last.

Y/N is sitting beside the unconscious version of himself when he returns. She turns his head to look at him, a smile on her face. For a moment, he considers staying here with her, reliving every single moment of their life and their relationship as it happens.

But he knows that he can't.

It wouldn't be right for him to stay here with her, knowing everything that he knows. Steve has had his time with her, time that he will treasure for the rest of is life. He knows that if he returns back to his timeline, there will be a lot of hurting that he will have to go through. Steve knows that it would be so much easier to stay here with Y/N, but he won't let himself do it.

So Steve explains to Y/N why he needed the scepter, leaving out her death and the death of her brother. After he finishes, she stays quiet for a moment, processing all of this new information. He just waits and sits there.

"Don't tell me what happens, please. I want the cards to fall where they may. I-I want to be surprised." Y/N tells him suddenly, glancing at the unconscious man before looking at Steve. The Captain understands exactly what she means. She must know somehow that she ends up with him, something on his face his showing his hand. Y/N had always told him that he had a shitty poker face. A smile stretches across his face, nodding. His wedding ring-hidden under his gloves-feels so much heavier, like its weighing his arm down.

A pit of dread opens up in Steve's stomach as his time draws to an end. He thanks and apologizes to Y/N as he hands over the scepter. She just smiles, telling him not to worry about it as she puts it back into its case. He must look as upset as he feels because before he leaves, Y/N wraps her arms around him. It surprises Steve, but he quickly wraps his arms back around her. Steve holds her tightly, letting his eyes shut. He knows that this will be the last time he'll ever hold her and he just savors it, wishing that it could last forever. Wishing that he could stay here forever.

But everything has to come to an end.

When he says goodbye, he knows that Y/N doesn't understand that this is him saying goodbye to her for the last time. Steve finally gets to tell her goodbye and even though he isn't able to tell Y/N how much he loves her, it's okay. It's okay because he will be able to tell her how much he loves her one day, even if that day isn't today. They'll be reunited again. He just needs to wait.

She tells him goodbye and he takes one final look at her before he returns back to his timeline, back into a world where she's gone.

That night, he returns to his empty apartment, the silence almost deafening. That hole in his chest has reopened and he is in so much pain that everything just feels numb.

He goes through the motions of getting ready for bed, washing the day's events off of him hoping that this would also wash away the numbness, trying to pretend like nothing of importance had happened hours earlier. When he crawls into the same bed he has been sleeping in for the past five years-a bed she has never touched-he realizes how empty it is without her. He can't feel her here like he can at the Compund-No, here she doesn't follow behind him. No, this is a place she has never been so she can't be here. The apartment is suddenly too big for him-everything is too big for him. It's too big and too empty and too fucking quiet-

It's like the string that was holding him together the past five years has finally snapped and he just starts crying. The Captain's body shakes with sobs as he lays in that empty room. Steve had thought he had processed her death and grieved already, but he hadn't. Until this very moment, it had never fully set in that Y/N was dead. It was never fully real that she was gone. He knew that she was, but some part of him was still holding out hope that somehow she was going to come back. If Bucky could come back, surely she could have as well. But Y/N isn't Bucky and so she never came back.

It took until today for him to fully realize that she was gone. Y/N was gone and there was nothing he can do about it. There was no stones to gather, no traveling through dimensions for him to do. Steve had to live the rest of his life without the love of his life, in a time where he'll never belong in. That small flicker of hope that had been silently living inside of him had been snuffed out, leaving an empty dark space inside of him, leaving him cold and empty.

The only hope that remained is that they would be reunited one day in death, but until then Steve would be forced to carry around his pain where ever he went.

#steve rogers x reader #steve rogers #captain america x reader #chris evans x reader

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kinnoth · 3 years

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After the battle, after the aether, Thor goes to Svartalfheim to bring his brother home. Loki lies how he had left him in the grey dust, his long, white hands folded over his lifeless breast, and not a thing about it allows Thor to mistake him for being asleep. Life's golden light has fled from him, and he is heavy and cold as a stone in his arms as Thor lays himself down next to him and wishes for a different world.

Even after, when no more tears will come, he holds him for a while longer. Loki's clothes, his hair, still hold his scent, beneath the stale tang of blood, and though there is nothing to pretend, Thor tries to find some relief in it. But night falls, even in Svartalfheim, and Thor must go. He unpins his red cloak and drapes it around Loki as his shroud.

Though it is not his duty to, Thor tends to his brother's body himself.

"This is unseemly," his father says.

Loki is stripped bare under a linen sheet and lain out upon a stone slab, the blue-veined marble of his limbs streaked with dust and black blood. Thor washes him carefully with a warm cloth and a basin of water. He says evenly, "It is not beneath my dignity to care for him any more than it was beneath yours to care for mother."

"She was my wife and queen to the nine realms." Odin knocks his great spear against the floor with emphasis. The chamber echoes violently. "Loki was a traitor and a criminal."

"And he was my brother. And he died for me because I could not save him."

"He killed your mother."

"Our mother died in defence of Jane Foster. Loki shares no more blame for that than you do, or I, or rather--" Thor feels his throat closing and his vision growing watery dim. He pulls his brother's cold hand up to his cheek and holds it there, tries to breathe deep what meagre comfort he can. "It is more my fault than anyone else's." Odin's face twists in something like impatience and so Thor beseeches him before he can start, "Please, father, even if you do not understand, I beg your indulgence in this matter for a little while longer."

Odin leaves him to his task and to carry himself through the maelstroms of his grief. Thor understands enough. Had they been different men in different circumstances, perhaps they might have mourned together, but Odin is not only his father, and not only his king. Thor is an ungrateful son and an ungrateful prince, but for not the first time in his life, he finds himself wishing that, rather than all the riches and privileges of his position, that he might have had a life where he had had a family for himself. A father who was only a father, a mother who was only a mother, a brother who he could have loved without the rule and responsibility and regret of Empire.

(The things Thor would have done for the chance to have loved Loki as his own man.)

But it was always the kingdom that came first in Odin's eye, and, with what it has cost him to keep it, Thor can understand how his father can have no concern left for anything else. He is heir to that doctrine, heir to that great and terrible empire, and god, to think he wanted that. To think what he had, mere days ago, been willing to become. To think that he and his brother had fought each other for that seat, that they had hurt each other for the privilege of being the tinder upon which the heart of empire burns.

Loki had won it and Loki had died, and now Thor is never going to be able to breathe again.

He cleans his brother's hair and combs it from his face. Thor touches it and tries to draw it into his memory. He might live another fifteen hundred or fifteen thousand years and he will never see this face again. This part of his life is over. The best part of his life is over. Thor is already beginning to forget. When was the last time he heard Loki say his name? When was the last time Loki had smiled for only him? When was the last time they had touched?

Thor pulls the sheet up to Loki's chin and makes it neat. He does not have the skill to close or disguise his brother's wounds, and so the morticians must come soon to ply their trade to make him ready for the funeral tomorrow. He has asked that they dress him in particular items in Loki's effects. It is custom that the dead go on in their next journey gleaming in their full armour and raiment, but Thor has never known Loki to be a warrior. He has chosen for him, instead, the clothing he best remembers of him: his deep green coat, his soft-soled shoes.

"I will see you again," he murmurs, for it is late now, and the lamps gutter meaningfully on their wicks. "Goodnight," he says. From his cold bed, Loki does not respond.

Thor wakes without having dreamt and that itself is something of a mercy. He leaves today; he has decided. He has no reason to stay.

He cleans himself and dresses himself and his eyes are dry. He will go to see his brother once more, and then he will go. He leaves the living area and makes his way down into the mortuary. He opens the door and then his heart stops. Loki is sleeping. Someone has come and enchanted the body. They have bloomed the warmth back beneath his skin and closed his eyes and even done the little trick of making his breast rise steadily and fall. They have left him in the clothes Thor chose for him, and for that he is thankful, but he is changed now, something too clear about his expression, too restful in the way they've draped his limbs. And he smells wrong, like nothing, like empty rooms with closed windows where no one lives or goes.

Loki is not here anymore, and there is nothing left in Asgard for Thor, only ghosts and bad dreams.

Thor feels the burning head of anger rise beneath his anguish, but it doesn't matter now, it is done, and there is naught left for him to do but to say goodbye. Thor slips his rough hand beneath his brother's hair once more and strokes his smooth jaw and the warm nape of his neck. He presses his lips to his brow and to each closed eye.

"Take with you all my love, brother," he murmurs. He kisses the thin line of his mouth, and when he draws back, Loki's lips slip open like a breath. "Loki?" he says cautiously, but of course there is no answer. Thor feels a flood rise within him too fast and zcalamitous. His dignity leaves him. He drowns. A ragged breath drags out of him, and Thor feels his legs give way, and then he is weeping.

"Brother, please," he says. He presses his face down into Loki's bewitched chest. His hands have turned to claws, and they rake at his brother's arms and hair and face. "Loki. Loki," he calls, "what am I supposed to do? Please," he begs, a child again, seeking comfort and having no recourse when comfort is not forthcoming. It is his own fault, of course. It has always been his fault. Too stupid, too foolhardy, too slow. What good is all his strength and power if none of it will save the ones he loves? What good is his life if he cannot have the ones he loves?

He cannot be here. He cannot stand to stay here a minute more.

The tears leave him gradually. He has made a mess of Loki's fine jacket, and his eyes feel heavy and dull. He sits back, feeling for his pulse inside of himself and willing it to slow. He must go and see his father; he must tell him of his decision. But for right now, he reaches out and smooths down the front of Loki's jacket and lays his hands back over the front of it. He lifts his chin carefully back to an angle that resembles repose and tucks back his hair. His hand comes away with a long inky coil; even in death, his brother is not free from Thor's injuries.

"Forgive me, I did not mean it," he says. His voice is choked and harsh from misuse, but he strokes, as gently as he is able, the lean angle of Loki's cheek. "Forgive me."

He sits and for a little while longer anyway, it is only the two of them together in this quiet room. For a little while anyway, Thor can almost pretend it is only morning.

#thorki #thor #Loki #thor the dark world #fic idea: odin and thor do not talk about how they are both widowers #authorial intent: odin is real odin and loki is real loki at this point #the trick mr potter is in not minding that it hurts #empire kills his mother his father and his brother #thor is an anti-imperialist #internal thor tag

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beccarooni · 3 years

Text

The End - Chapter 2

(Tag list: @ageofgeek, @elreyciervo, @woahthisguy, @generationblip - ask to be added!)

Loki hadn’t been permitted to show his face at Frigga’s funeral, but he’d had a good enough second-hand description to imagine it as if he had. Golden towers, draped with black cloth. His mothers boat, adorned with flowers, her sword placed in her hands and a golden veil over her face. A flaming arrow shot by their finest archers - and even that too was gold. Frigga would sail to the ends of their horizon; dissolving into flame and sparks, her spirit scattered amongst the stars, marking her journey to Valhalla. Where the brave shall live forever.

He knew the feelings well enough; even if the visual had not been his. He knew that aching feeling inside - like a creature, tiny and desperate, trapped beneath his ribcage and clawing to escape. Loss was something he was well acquainted with by now; and the splendour that Asgard attached to it seemed almost intrinsic to the process. Asgard’s warriors died the deaths of heroes; it was only right that their passages would be heralded by something as glorious as they had in life.

Cramped in the Quinjet bathroom, with barely enough room to get on his knees, Loki muttered out the parting prayer - quiet enough so that Banner couldn’t hear from the other side of the door. A piece of his armour caught against the sink, and all of a sudden he was struck by how wrong this felt.

Sadness, he expected. Fury, and rage; those were emotions he knew came with death. But this sense of wrongness, of shame - it was new. It was new, and uncomfortable, and he wanted it to stop.

There was no body to bury. Nothing to cast to the stars, no boat to lay his brother to rest in, no hammer to place gently against his chest. This was the best he could do, and it burned his face with shame. Loki didn’t know the fate of the others. They may have survived, but they also may have died. And that would make Thor the last one. Possibly the last true Asgardian, and this was how his parting from this world would be marked. No fanfare, no lanterns, no stars.

An airplane bathroom, smaller than a closet, and a few words whispered from cracked and bleeding lips. The harsh smell of cleaning agents, and the harsher glare of the flickering light above him. A body, his brother, left in the cold grip of space - maybe forever. The best he could hope for was that a passing garbage collector would take pity on the condemned, and at least allow them the decency of a disposal.

This was what Loki of Asgard had to offer the God of Thunder, and it sickened him to think of it.

Loki swallowed, pressed his forehead against the plastic walls, and muttered the last of the prayers.

“Thor, I bid you take your place in the halls of Valhalla, where the brave shall live forever. Nor shall we mourn but rejoice, for those that have died the glorious death.”

Glorious death.

He sniffed, slumping from his knees further to the floor, and shutting his eyes against the world.

There was nothing glorious about this.

His throat hurt, and he allowed himself a few tears as the neon light flickered above him. The prayer was the only tribute he had to give. Well, that and revenge, of course.

Revenge was a talent Loki had yet to perfect. His schemes had a nasty habit of going awry at the last second - but, he supposed, the one person who was always there to thwart said schemes wasn’t here anymore. Now, there was a stretch of open road between him and his dagger piercing Thanos’s heart. Wherever that monster landed, whatever cursed ground marked the final battle, he knew he would be there. His soul wouldn’t let him rest if he wasn’t.

That would be the final gesture he could make for his brother, then. Thanos would die at his hand, he would pay for all he had taken from them. The gentle ending that they were robbed of; where they sailed to earth through the stars, as their ancestors once had. Where they landed, safe and sound, and rebuilt their departed homeworld. If the Mad Titan was so fond of balance, then he could experience it for himself. The scales would tip even with his death; and then, perhaps Loki could rest. Leave for somewhere new, and condemn this blood soaked tapestry to the dirt.

The tale of the house of Odin; beginning in blood, and ending as it began. Crimson, it seemed, was destined to stain the pages of their storybook. And Loki had seen more than enough of it for one lifetime.

“Hey, Loki?”

Banner knocked on the door, gentle enough that Loki almost didn’t hear it over the sound of the engines.

“Are you alright in there? It’s just, uh, it’s been a while. I don’t know if you’re sick, or...yeah.”

Loki cleared his throat, moving to his feet. A quick glance in the mirror, an adjustment of illusions, and he was himself again. There was a certain image he wanted to uphold with the Avengers; even if Banner had certainly seen worse of him (tied to a chair in Valkyrie’s apartment and having a bottle lobbed at his head, for one). They still thought of him as a threat - and there was comfort in that perception. An evil being, a god mad with power - they wouldn’t feel sorrow. Evil wouldn’t cry for its kin. Evil was unstoppable, unstable; an ever shifting force. He didn’t want to disabuse any of them of that notion quite just yet.

“I’m fine. Just washing my hands.” He opened the door, coming face to face with the worrisome scientist standing in front of him.

“I would think that with all the riches in his possession, Stark would grace you with more than one bathroom.” Loki moved past Banner, stalking back to his seat with as much dignity as one could muster when exiting from an airplane bathroom.

“Yeah. It does make missions kinda awkward, sometimes.” Banner rubbed the back of his head, hovering by the door for a moment before shuffling back to the bench where he was sat.

“Six super-people and only one bathroom. It can get intense.”

“I can only imagine.” Loki grimaced as he sat down, folding his hands in his lap.

There was a silence, then. But one with a touch of anticipation. Banner kept looking at him, and after a few minutes it began to grate on his nerves. It was the face of a scientist, after all. The one brimming with questions but holding back purely on social decorum. Banner tapped his feet, bounced his leg, cast him a sideways look. Loki stared ahead impassively, keeping his eyes trained on the window in front of him. He could guess what question it was that Banner wanted answering; and, frankly, it wasn’t something Loki wanted to discuss right now.

Banner wanted to know why Loki had chosen to help them. Why his loyalties had so quickly changed. And of course it was a complex answer; one wrought with chaos and really it would require a play with at least twelve acts to get through, and -

“Why’d you say that earlier?”

The scientist spoke softly, and Loki turned to him, arching an eyebrow in confusion.

“About Thor being dead.”

Loki groaned, leaning until the back of his head touched the cold metal wall behind him.

“Why do you care?”

He wanted to muster some venom into his voice; to spit out the words with vitriol and hatred. But he was so tired, and it came out with more numbness than he intended.

Banner looked at him a little more intensely then, and he could’ve sworn a hint of green crept into the scientist’s eyes.

“Why do I care?” He shook his head, frowning deeply. “You keep telling me about how your brother - one of my closest friends - is dead, and then wonder why that might possibly piss me off?”

Loki scoffed, and Banner folded his arms, shifting his gaze into a dark corner of the quinjet.

“I care because you’re not even giving him a chance. It’s like you have no faith in him - when he’s had nothing but faith in you. You’ve died a lot, and he’s always expected you to come back sooner or later.”

“This is different.”

“How? How is it different? If you’ve come back enough times, then he can too. I know you don’t think he’s smart enough for that but he is. He’s smart, and strong, and kind, and I just-” Banner cut himself off as his face illuminated with green, and his voice shot a few octaves deeper than normal.

Loki scooted back, watching the scientist's face with a degree of caution. He didn’t expect the beast to appear - when one of the sorcerers had hurried Banner back into the building, looking thoroughly un-green, he assumed something had happened. Which was understandable, he supposed. Travelling through the bifrost was bad enough for the inexperienced - let alone the unfortunate circumstances surrounding their travel.

He and Hulk had an uneasy truce on the Statesman. They stayed out of eachothers way, mostly. Hulk was wary of him; and vice versa - even if Thor had tried his best to ease tensions between them with group meetings and ‘dinner nights’. But that wasn’t enough to make him jump for joy at the prospect of seeing Hulk again; especially on a cramped jet, and without his usual strength to defend himself.

Although, it might be nice to see the beast again. It would be a familiar face at the very least; and while he wasn’t concerned about the giant’s safety, he couldn’t deny that his strength had brought a certain comfort with it. When you had the hulk by your side, you felt unstoppable. And it would be rather nice to have that confidence for the battle ahead.

When the scientist seemed to catch himself, Loki was almost disappointed. Banner breathed heavily, the green veins on his face dying down and retreating below the surface.

“He can’t be dead, Loki. He just...He can’t be.”

Loki paused, leaning forward a little. Studying the man in front of him; the twitches, the clasped hands wringing together, the never ending tapping of the foot. The strained expression; the eyes that held hope, but something else underneath that. Something desperate.

Banner didn’t just want Thor back. He needed him.

And all at once, those accidental touches on the Statesman made sense. Every guiding hand on the small of Banner’s back, every meal that the two had shared together, each word of comfort and gentle smile; it wasn’t just comradery.

Loki’s eyes widened, and he laughed; a hollow, bitter sound.

“You liked him.”

“What?” Banner looked away from him then, a muscle twitching in his cheek. “Of course I like him. I’ve known the guy for 6 years.”

“No, this is much more than a - Oh, what did he call it - a friend from work. You fancied him.”

He caught the sight of Bruce’s fists clenching at his sides, and for some reason that sparked something inside of him. A memory from long ago; of being trapped in that glass prison, with a sudden desire to set the beast loose.

“Well, maybe your paramour being dead will be enough to draw the beast back from the shadows. Does it make you angry, Bruce? Does the thought of someone you love dying for nothing fill you with rage?”

“Stop.” Bruce dropped to a whisper, screwing his eyes shut as if that could drown out the sound.

Some part of him told him to take pity on the man. A word of wisdom from his mother; that grief shared was grief halved. And maybe this wasn’t very nice of him, and maybe it wasn’t at all in line with honouring his brother’s memory, but at this moment he couldn’t find it within him to care. He wanted glory again - wanted the feeling of control that he’d had back on the helicarrier.

“I wonder if you ever confessed it to one another - or did he die without ever knowing it? You know, I always assumed that when his heart stopped he thought of Asgard, but maybe he thought of you. Maybe the last thing he ever felt was heartbreak, because he never knew if you loved him back-”

“Stop it!” Bruce’s voice deepened as he leapt to his feet, the veins along his neck deepening to a dark green; but it went further than that. Green blotches spread across his arms, and there was a momentary wildness in his eyes that Loki recognised.

The beast was here. Loki bared his teeth in a fierce grin, hands waiting for his daggers and his body itching for a fight.

But none came.

Banner’s fists stayed clenched, he shook with anger, but that was apparently all the good doctor could muster. The remnants in his eyes died out, like the last few sparks of a campfire, and he remained firmly Bruce Banner-sized. Loki sank back into his chair after the moment of apprehension, sighing.

“I was hoping that would work.” He shook his head dejectedly, a scowl creeping into his face and voice. “I get the sense that we might need him, eventually.”

“Jesus, Loki. So, what - your plan was to get me mad enough for a hulkout? And you thought now was the perfect moment? Here?” Banner gestured around their surroundings - to the low ceiling of the quin jet, the fragile equipment piloting their journey.

Loki’s head thunked against the wall as he melted back into the seat, shrugging listlessly. “I suppose I didn’t think that one through very well.”

“No, you didn’t.” Banner paced about the ship, wringing his hands together before he turned back to Loki, a hint of that previous anger emanating into his tone.

“Look, I know you miss him. And just because I don’t think he’s dead doesn’t mean I’m not worried about him - I don’t think I’ll ever stop worrying about him,” He paused, looking up to the ceiling - his face contorting as if he was having to force these words out.

“But don’t you dare take this out on me. Mourn, if you want. Get angry, get sad - but don’t you take this out on me just because I still have hope.”

“Hope.” Loki chuckled mirthlessly. “Hope is a fool's gamble, Banner.”

“Maybe.” Bruce swallowed, his features smoothing out as his eyes turned to the viewing window beside them. “But it’s a gamble I’m willing to take.”

#my fic #fanfic #thor fanfic #loki fanfic #infinity war au #infinity war fix it fic #thor odinson #loki odinson #brodinsons #thorbruce #thorbruce fic #multi chapter #mcu fic #long post #2k #bruce banner #angst

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ithoughtthiswastwitterbutfr · 3 years

Text

WandaVision Episode 8 spoilers

Ok I heard this episode is sad so I’m prepared to cry and ruin my eyeliner.

I’m just emotionally preparing myself rq before I start I’m assuming a lots gonna go down cause the second episode is the finale.

I’m still not ready 2 minutes later lmao wait.

Okay hmm the title is called Previously On so we’re going back in time to her childhood based on the summary.

I think we’re gonna get more insight on her and Visions relationship and how it formed and hopefully get to see her relationship with her brother I’m starting now.

Ugh my TV is glitching

Okay we’re starting out in witch trials so it’s Agathas backstory the lady staring at her looks familiar. Oh it’s her mom

Her powers are blue here she’s into dark magic and the book in her basement is the stolen book from Doctor Strange im assuming she began learning dark magic from it l.

As they started to drain her. Her powers became blue and she starting to drain them back. I’m assuming the witches shared power and it was blue and now that it’s dark magic it’s purple.

Wow she killed her whole coven my draining them of their life and magic. Then she took her mother’s amulet so that’s the amulet she’s always wearing from the comics is.

She admitted her thoughts weren’t available and she was never under control.

Her accent is back because she’s angry because of her children being missing.

She possessed the fake Pietro from another universe she didn’t say he was from another universe she just said she couldn’t get to his body so she had to do possession instead of necromancy.

She picked up the fly now she’s chanting in Latin

She’s mind controlling and talking about how thousands of people can be under your control and all interact with each other with complex storylines which makes me think she wants Wanda power because she’s jealous she can do everything like transformation and mind control without having to study all the spells

“Magic on autopilot,” Dhe wants to know how she did this and she wouldn’t tell her and now she’s manipulating her with her own loneliness. She took a piece of her hair so now she has her DNA

Real reruns aka memories so she can look into them to see how she did it.

Her kids are crying out for in the basement so she’s gonna go with Agatha to save them I honestly don’t think the cries were her own.

OHHH MY GOD

All the movies her parents were going to sell were the decades and movies she did projected.

When Wanda walked into the memory she turned into her younger self,

The Dick Van Dick show is in the TV shape of the one Darcy used on the first episode so we know where she got her inspo for that one.

Everything outside makes me think this is the scene where her parents die.

The Stark bomb just hit and she’s looking around and can’t find her family yeah the Stark industry label is in front of her and she’s reverted back to Sokovian because she’s young and not the best at English yet I’m assuming.

The TV I’d still on and playing the show “At the end of the episode you realize it was all a bad dream,” I’m not sure why she said that part in English maybe because she’s referring to the show and movie nights are for English?

Agatha is asking if she used a probability hex to stop the bomb because Wanda reached her hand out towards it and that’s how she uses her powers.

Maybe Agatha is hinting towards Wanda being a natural born witch?

“So what I see here a baby witch obsessed with sitcoms and years of therapy ahead of her. Doesn’t explain your recent hijinks,”

Wanda used her powers subconsciously there and she’s probably using her powers subconsciously to keep Westview running and she used them subconsciously to get it started.

“The only way forward is back,”

She’s referring to Wanda not wanting to go back to Hydra I haven’t seen the scene yet but I’m assuming it’s because the testing was painful and because she now knows who hydra is and what it stands for.

“Don’t be scared you already lived it once,”

They have Loki’s sceptor of course im assuming they got it from SHIELD since they are SHIELD.

She didn’t have to touch the sample it just came to her on its own further proving she’s a witch but I don’t think she knows she moved it,

She touched the tesseract making the mine stone she then absorbed all its energy and passed out.

In isolation she’s watching another sitcom I just can’t figure out which it is.

I’m sure the episode on the TV is important “she hasn’t got any feeling,” maybe it’s about the Westview citizens or maybe it’s about vision being a doll or like a puppet and the brother is like “she hasn’t got any feelings” just like when Pietro or Fietro called Vision a popsicle an inanimate object

“So little orphan Wanda got up close and personal with an infinity stone that amplified what otherwise would’ve died on the vine. The broken pieces of you are adding up buttercup I have a theory but I need more,” This is probably talking about how if you don’t use your powers or learn to control them you stop having them but the infinity stone just made the powers she already had stronger. The name Scarlett Witch is starting to make sense now.

Another door another memory that I’d her watching Malcom in the middle.

She said the Avengers compound was the first home she had ever shared with Vision and with her family and country gone she felt alone so I’m assuming she’s with Vision cause he cured her loneliness.

Vision walking through the walls again she asking him to watch the sitcom with her. The sitcoms are important to her and she’s sharing them with him.

“So it is funny because of the grievous injury that man just suffered?” Vision

“No he’s not really injured,” Wanda

“How Can you be sure?”

“It’s not that kind of show,”

I think this is sort of related to the fact that nothing bad ever happens in Westview permanently like in Malcolm in the middle where the roof structure fell on the dad sure he got hurt but it wasn’t a detrimental injury.

He wants to comfort to her “The only thing that would bring me comfort is seeing him again,” Wanda about Pietro she felt the same with Vision hence why Westview is happening and why he’s back.

“I’m so tired, It’s just like this wave washing over me again and again it knocks me down and when I try stand up it just comes for me again and I can’t- it’s just gonna drown me,” How she explains her grief and depression we’re getting a glismpe of how she copes with death in her actual reality.

Vision says he’s always been alone he never experienced loss because he never had a loved one to lose.

“What is grief if not love preserving,” Okay damn Vision getting all deep.

Aww they just had a moment and now he’s laughing over the show how sweet. The awkward smile they did at eachother. How cute

Vision was dead and she wanted him back now we get to see how she stole Visions body back from her perspective.

All the news on the TV playing might not be revelant but it’s related to tamiles being reunited after the blip. So this is very shortly after the blip and some people might be right thinking it was almost directly after Tony’s funeral.

“He deserves a funeral at least I deserve it,”

They’re letting her take him probably to be able to paint her as a villain which is why Hayward cut out the first part of the footage.

She’s being shown him take apart and sawed she’s in pain seeing him practically dying again. Hayward called vision a weapon and Wanda is saying he’s not a weapon because he wasn’t and he didn’t want to be a weapon Hayward is hiding his true intentions of bringing him back to be his own weapon

“I just want to bury him. That’s all I want,”

She said she can’t do that she truly believes she can’t.

He won’t let her take $3 billion of vibranium to put in the ground she just wanted him to have a proper burial but Hayward provoked her and set her off.

She can’t feel him. A nod to how Vision said “I only feel you,” When he asked Wanda to kill him there is nothing left. She hot in the car and went to Westview she left and when she left she didn’t have Visions body.

She’s pulled up to place where she planned to grow old in with Vision and it’s been demolished this is the scene where she breaks down crying over it. And when she grieved she lets it get the best of her which is how she put the house back together without realizing she was doing it. Then that spread over the whole town and she is projected her own version of Vision. But I’m unsure if this is really Vision or not because then she’d be way more powerful than I ever believe to be able to create people own her own.

Oh wow she’s showing all the lights and it’s like she’s own set so she’s back to where Agatha had this all set up and she was the audience.

Agatha is choking the twins “I know what you are. You have no idea how dangerous you are. You’re supposed to be a myth. A being capable of spontaneous creation. and here you are using it to make breakfast for dinner.” Maybe Wanda was a prophecy before hand and she just never learned how powerful she really was and now Agatha is trying to feed off her powers I’m assuming she’s going to try to get Wanda to push her powers into her so she can drain her.

“Let go of my children,” Wanda with her accent coming back.

“Oh, yes your children and Vision and this whole little life you’ve made, this is Chaos magic Wanda. That makes you the Scarlett Witch,” Ugh yes one of those moments where they say a name of the movie or a character that’s basically it’s own movie I love it.

I’m gonna research Chaos magic and then I’ll reblog this again after I research some other things too.

End credits time. “Team is ready for launch,” They’re going to use Wanda own power to attack her using Visions actual corpse. He’s been brought back as the one thing he didn’t want to be. A weapon. I’m not sure who that was who powered it up but was it Monica’s contact?

Also doesn’t Agatha have Monica now if she was possessing Fietro? I have a lot of questions that I can’t get out right now

#wandavision theories #wandavisionedit #wandavision spoilers #WandaVision #wanda maximoff #vision #billy and tommy #billy maximoff #tommy maximoff #pietro maximoff #agatha harkness #director hayward #monica rambeau #Scarlett witch

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poormeowmeowcollector · 3 years

Text

Let me give you my life

Pairing: Loki x Tesseract

Warnings: Major Character Death, Mourning, delusions, mental illness, alcohol, Original Character Death, Odin, fantastic racism

Summary: After Frigga's funeral, Loki starts hearing a voice. It changes their life completely.

Chapter 3: Verse 3

Chapter warnings: math, fantastic racism, death (not graphic)

Chapter summary: the orders

Previous chapter, AO3, next chapter

If I'm a pagan of the good times / my lover's the sunlight

Loki storms the library once again, this time searching everything about the Tesseract and this Entropy they call him all the time.

Entropy still remains a mystery, but there are even more writings about the space stone than the ones they've seen before.

"It says here that they worshipped you," Loki says, but only internally. He's in public, speaking to the walls would make him appear mad.

"People express loyalty in different ways," they answer, always softer since the deal.

"Is that what you want? Loyalty?"

"Among other things, yes. But mostly trust that I will not hurt you, cause I won't," they promise. Loki already knows this.

Can't break something that's already in pieces.

"Brother!" Thor yells as he walks in. Loki's shoulders tense, this idiot never warns them.

"Tho-thor," he answers, eyes on Thor as they drab a chair and side beside him. "How come you be i-i-in here? You ha-ha-hate books," they raise an eyebrow at their brother.

"I'm here to see how you're doing. You've been acting oddly lately," he answers, those blue eyes scanning Loki.

"People grie-grie-grie-grieve in different ways, Th-thor. I a-a-a-assure you, I'm fi-fine," he hums, turning back to the book.

"Loki. After all this, just remember that I'm here for you, eh? You needn't face anything alone," Thor insists, placing a big and steady hand on Loki's shoulder.

Loki's body nods, and smiles, watching as Thor smiles back before leaving. Loki's mind wonders if this is all a mistake. Thor was, is grieving too. Maybe this is all too much…

But Thor wasn't there when Gæirasson offended Loki, neither time. In fact, Thor has been a ghost since Frigga's death.

"You have my trust and loyalty, until the end," Loki decides, feeling in their core how relieved the Tesseract is by the answer.

"Allow me to show you another secret then. Look at your hands but don't touch anything and don't let it spread," they answer.

Loki lets the book and brings his torn from the picking hands under the table, always watching them. Black ropes start appearing and tangling themselves on their fingers, creating a calming sensation and demanding more ground, but Loki doesn't allow it. Out of all kinds of magic, this is by far the most powerful one he has ever seen.

And the most chaotic.

To keep the Goddess on my side / she demands a sacrifice

Like every day, the official Tesseract session is late at night, while Loki should be sleeping. Signs of their decreasing amount of sleep are becoming more and more visible, but they don't care.

"The o-orders?" he asks.

"You need to know some things first. In order to keep you from dying, King Laufey made a deal with one of us. Your life for acts of service. You need to do some things before being free," they do speak like they did on the first days, but somehow still softer.

"Acts of s-s-service?" he questions. So, the stone just needs hands and will borrow theirs?

"Yes. There are things that will keep the stones safe from those who seek them to do harm. Asgard has two, and you need to make sure that some things are set to their protection. It's just one thing, really. But you need to use your new powers to do so,"

Loki nods, the movement small and cut, like a soldier's.

"Ready to-to comply,"

Drain the whole sea / get something shiny

"First order. Free yourself from everything, good and bad," the Tesseract says. Loki blinks in confusion.

"H-how?"

"What bad do you carry into you? The possessiveness, the jealousy, this ego you named pride, all this fury… you don't need them from now on. Let them go," they insist.

"L-let them go?"

"Act as if they don't exist, don't give them your attention. The same thing goes for your bright side. You faith in your moral compass, your deep feeling for everything you care about. Both of those sides will keep you from moving on. You mustn't listen to them anymore," they explain, as if it's something easy.

"So… y-y-you want me to be-to be your li-little m-m-minion?" he raises an eyebrow. Is that what they agreed on? Being a tiny pawn but just on a different chess board?

“No. Not exactly. You are not to abandon them for my own good, but for yours. The acts might hurt these sides of you, you need them in one piece,” their voice softens.

Loki takes a breath, in and out as slow as possible, and nods again. “What-what sh-sh-should I-I do?” even though the stutter stays, he refuses to let his voice break.

They swear they can feel the stone smiling.

“Listen to me, and don’t act upon them. Also, learn how to control possibility magic,”

Possibility magic? Is that what the black ropes are?

“Learn how Midgardians think of possibilities. It’s close to how your new abilities work,” they advise him. So, this is what being under the orders of a stone is like? Homework and pretending? it’s nothing they don’t know how to do for hundreds of years…

“And after the-the week?”

“the fun starts.”

Loki smiles wide, wider than he has ever smiled even before Frigga’s death.

something meaty for the main course / that’s a fine looking high horse

The week passes peacefully. Loki doesn’t have to worry about how to do what, the Tesseract is there to help them with it and lets them just decide how to do what and, oddly enough, the Midgardian science was calming.

At least, more calming than war theory. And less graphic.

He was chilling on the training grounds and working on the newfound magic, until the Tesseract came.

“It’s time,” they say moments before a blinding blue light covers Loki.

With the blink of an eye, they’re at a castle’s yard, hiding behind a bush.

“Prevent the war, you know how,” the Tesseract says again.

On the contrary, Loki has no idea where he is and what he has to do.

At least not until a guard passes by, near the bush, their armour bearing Gæirasson's symbol.

They smirk, moving from shadow to shadow and into the castle, where they cast an invisibility spell to navigate without worrying about getting caught.

What you've got in the stable? / We've a lot of starving faithful

In the grand hall, Loki finds the old lord. They're discussing an attack, in which he is the main character, of course. They're to strike tomorrow evening.

Loki has to hold himself not to laugh. Instead, they sit and wait. Wait until Gæirasson ends the council and heads to their bedroom. And Loki follows. Until the corridors make a room, with six doors to navigate through.

It would be such a shame if they suddenly closed shut, locking the two foes inside.

The old fool chuckles. "I know you're here, Frost Giant. I can smell your people's blood," he looks around.

Loki chuckles back and drops the spell, standing right in front of the man.

"Is it this? Or do your aged joins hurt with the cold?" he titles his head, showing his signature mischievous smile.

"Why are you here? To negotiate? We've been past this part," they growl. Loki doesn't break the smirk, but lets a glow pass their eyes. Green, but with icy blue undertones, and a pitch black shadow.

"No. We are here to talk about monsters. For, as you can smell, the blood of my siblings who you slained are screeching for it"

That looks tasty / that looks plenty / this is hungry work

"Do you know anything of my people's belief regarding the Norns?" Loki asks, circling around the man like a predator waiting to strike.

"Why should I care about the opinions of monsters?" he spits, trying to mimic the glare.

"Oh, because it's interesting. We believe in the norns, like you do. But they don't create the strings, they knit them. Twisting and turning and combining and separating people, and letting us choose where to go on each knot. Fascinating. Oddly enough, the mortals have a similar way of thinking, at least the ones who are closer to science. They name it possibilities, and write it with numbers,

"Let me give you an example. There's a fifty percent possibility that I will continue this conversation with my normal face," Loki speaks, letting the Æsir glamour fade and rising to his Jötunn height. "But I won't choose this path because your ceilings are low and I would have to bend my neck," they continue, after walking a few steps and letting their horns scratch the ceiling. The glamour appears again, bringing him to his Æsir skin.

"And there's always the possibility that you die, because of your old age and the stress of the war you created. And the only reason people remember you is as an example of why not to piss me off," he grins, the black ropes tangling around his wrists.

"And the possibility, in Midgardian terms, is one hundred percent," they leap closer and grab the old man by his collar, staring right into the fear in his eyes.

"I have a message for my people in Hel, deliver it when you see them. Tell them to rip this old cunt apart, yet keep one piece for me for when I arrive," he spits, watching as the ropes tangle around their throat and mummify them in front of his eyes, making the fear and anger burn out.

They throw the corpse on the floor and open the doors as the Tesseract casts another light, revealing Loki's chambers as it fades away.

"You shouldn't have scratched the ceiling with your horns," they say, worried.

"And? I laughed at the face of one old fool already, what's a second one? And if I am to join my family, let at least my exit from the hypocrites be dramatic," he laughs, ready for the guards to storm in and take him to the dungeons.

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finitepeace · 3 years

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my this week’s reading

Syzygy (a Kludged Together remix) by Mizzy

Summary: When Tony Stark cut Steve Rogers' morning jog short to join him on a reconnaissance mission off the East Coast, Tony sure wasn’t expecting to end up stuck on a life raft in the middle of the ocean, Steve's hand knuckle-deep in his chest.

13k+ words, arc reactor problem, steve & tony on an adventure together, all these cuteness..

The Butterfly Effect by itsallAvengers 💙

Summary: While fighting with Loki, Steve Rogers from 2012 hears the two simple words: "Bucky's alive."

And the whole universe ripples with the aftershocks.

20,5k words, endgame fix-it, stony in alternate reality

Down in Lonesome Town by resurrectedhippo

Summary: “Why do I always find my way back to you?”

Maybe Tony didn’t necessarily return to Steve, but fate is a funny little thing, and after living a life of loss, Steve wants something that’s his to keep.

After the universe is restored, Steve is lost without any direction. Retiring from the Avengers, he moves across the country and ends up building a house by a misty blue lake. Across the bridge is Tony Stark’s new workshop.

79k words, post endgame, stony mending their relationship while living in countryside (so fights and anger are there) featuring morgan and peter!

you'll wait a long time by nanasekei

Summary:

Steve and Tony share a moment during a wedding. Things escalate from there.

Alternatively: Four weddings, a funeral, and one very emotionally stunted idiot.

16,5k words. post end-game but everybody lives (and getting married). steve being frustrating with his feelings lol, tony flirts

Second Chance Lives by raeldaza 💙

Summary: Tony's gonna die of palladium poisoning anyway, why not join a pointless expedition to recover Captain America’s body? And after, well, why not dedicate his last few months to making sure an American hero settles into his new life? What else is he going to do, get drunk at parties?

44k words, Iron Man 2 but stony, Tony found Steve on ice and took him in,

Haste by Veldeia

Summary: With Captain America seriously injured and a bomb attached to the Quinjet, set to go off at any change in speed or altitude, this is not the best flight the Avengers have ever had.

7,5k words, avengers on mission, injured steve and self-sacrificing tony, SPOILER: gnidne yppah

'Til Death Do Us Part by itsallAvengers

Summary: Steve goes on a mission. Steve dies on the mission. Or at least, SHIELD make everyone think he's died on the mission. In reality, he's alive and well, and still kicking ass.

If only someone had let his husband know that.

15,5k words, fake death so... angst for tony

Unshattered by erde (orphan_account) 💙

Summary: It's really a split of a second, but for a moment there both of them remain in silence staring at each other, and it's a throwback to that moment in Siberia when a truce seemed more likely than shit hitting the fan.

Steve picks up the pieces from their relationship and tries to make them better. As the official tinker of things, Tony isn't happy with Steve's shoddy work. At first.

127k words in 19 chapters, civil war fix it continuing to IW and endgame, SPOILER: tony get shot, gnidne yppah

Unveil My Unsightly Heart by Mizzy 💙

Summary: Looking over an old prototype helicarrier for its future viability as a base for the Avengers should have just been a routine day full of bickering and non-adventure for Steve Rogers and Tony Stark.

But when they're catapulted into an alternate universe – where their alternate selves are married and battling with a mysterious threat – the two are forced to get over their differences in order to figure out what's going on, before it's too late.

Because there's more going on than meets the eye, and Steve and Tony falling in love might just be the most dangerous thing that can happen. Not just for one universe, but for all of them… [Iron Man 3-compliant.]

43k words in 3 chapters, stony journeyed to alternate reality where they are VERY MUCH in love and married, angst but SPOILER gnidne yppah

Lost in Transcription by Veldeia

Summary: In a world recently turned upside down by the discovery of genetic markers for soulmates, Steve and Tony struggle to come to grips with their unexpected, unasked-for match.

25k words, story spanning from steve in ww2 to civil war so.. a bit of civil war fix-it?, heartbroken tony

For You, Sir, Always (The Fairy Godfather Remix) by Veldeia

Summary: Unable to find a replacement for the toxic palladium core of his arc reactor, Sir has gone into cryostasis to wait for a day when science has advanced enough to provide a solution. While he is indisposed, it is my all-important task to decide when that time has arrived, and to select the person who shall bring him back to life.

9,4k words, Jarvis POV, Jarvis being super loyal, steve is not captain america when stony met.

Presenteeism by Veldeia

Summary: Tony thinks piloting the armor remotely while letting the others believe he’s wearing it is a good plan, until he realizes he’s not hung over, but actually quite ill.

Steve thinks something’s off with Tony today, but he has no clue what that might be, and since Tony says he’s good to go, they’ll proceed with the mission anyway.

(Basically, that trope where Tony is sick but is too stubborn to admit it, with a slight twist. Fill for my Stony bingo prompt “armor”.)

9,5k words in 2 chapters, it’s all in the summary.

#last week #stevetony #stony #fic rec

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lokislittlesigyn · 3 years

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OG616 : Thor: The Dark World - Pt.5 [The Visit]

[My masterlist, where all parts of this and my other fics can be found]

Pairing: Loki / Sigyn (basically an oc based off the marvel/myth namesake)

Warnings: Major character death, some other mentions of violence/death. Nothing overly graphic.

Author’s Note: Have a little old-married-couple-Logyn as a treat. (followed by immediate sad. I promise, this gets less dark soon!)

Taglist: @high-functioning-lokipath , @onaheroicmission To be added to the taglist, just ask me here or send a message! <3 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

He was there.

Right there.

Moments away. Inches away. Loki stood with his back to her, flipping through a book.

The inside of his cell looked surprisingly comfortable, mostly thanks to what few things she and Frigga sent. Inside there were the tables, the chair and footstool. Books, stacked neatly against the far wall. A bed in the corner - with their blankets on it. The bed was unmade, one of the blankets hanging off the edge onto the floor.

At least he’s gotten some rest.

She smiled softly, then looked at him again. She wasn't sure how to get his attention.

Glancing around just to make sure they were alone, she pulled down her cloak's hood.

Seconds felt like years. Eons.

What do I say?

She stared at him. Took another step up the stairs before the cell, and tripped - gasping sharply, barely catching herself before she fell into the field of burning energy.

That was close. She leaned back, trembling slightly, her gaze locked on the deep gold aura gleaming in front of her.

Then she looked up. Her heart skipped a beat.

Loki was watching her, his face conveying pure astonishment for a split second - then confusion. Anger?

"Sigyn." He snapped his book shut. "I should have known you would be foolish enough to come here."

"Foolish?"

"Yes, foolish. It is foolish to risk getting caught, to risk getting killed-" He stopped himself. Exhaled, set the book aside. Looked back at her. "You should not have come."

"I hadn't meant to anger you..."

"Pardon me for fearing for my wife's safety."

"Loki, I am safe." She tried to step closer, but stopped at the barrier. She already hated the barrier. "You see? I got past the guards without them ever noticing - Loki, I'm here, I've come to you! Are you not glad to see me?"

"I would be more glad if you were not so close to being locked away too."

Sigyn's voice softened. "If it meant being with you, I would choose it."

Loki swallowed, watching her. He stepped closer.

"What happened to you, Loki? What did they do to you?"

"The Asgardians?" He huffed a laugh.

"No. The creatures you were with, the mad titan and his ally. What happened?"

Loki’s smile quickly disappeared.

".. You shan't speak of it. Of course." Sigyn looked away.

Give him time. Be patient.

She looked back at him.

He seemed to be studying her. Soaking in every inch of her. It felt almost like when he would admire her, so long ago. Of course, she admired him too.

She'd always admired him.

"I still can't believe you're here.." She breathed. "I missed you. I missed you so much. When they told me you were dead, I..." Tears gathered in her eyes. "I couldn't believe it. I didn't, at first. And then you were alive again. But you weren't safe, you were out there, alone.." She stumbled over the words, whispering through tears. "I missed you."

He let out a soft, defeated sigh, blinking slowly. "I missed you too."

Sigyn's heart felt lighter than it had in over a year.

He missed me. He still loves me.

She smiled, in spite of the circumstances, though she desperately wished she could join him. She wiped a few tears away with the back of her hand.

"The necklace I gave you.." Loki walked to the edge of the barrier, his hands behind his back. "You still wear it."

"Of course I do." She pulled it from under her shirt, holding it out. "I haven't stopped."

"Since..?"

"Since the day you fell."

Loki nodded. "Hm. Truly the goddess of fidelity."

"It's just a title," She returned the necklace to its previous spot.

"But you uphold it well."

She smirked. "As you do yours."

Loki let out a breathy laugh. "I'm sure many would disagree."

"The god of mischief," She smiled, warmth in her voice, "The trickster. Fitting titles, both."

"And yet who is now on the outside looking in? Hiding their identity, committing - I'm afraid to say - terrible crimes?"

"Is it a crime to see my husband?"

"It's certainly a crime to break into the dungeon."

"Funny. You'd think they'd be more worried about someone getting out, not in." Sigyn grinned.

Loki huffed, "You would be surprised."

"Perhaps. Shows how much I‘ve yet to learn," she giggled, glancing away for a moment. As she turned her head, she could've sworn she saw Loki truly smile at her.

"Have you any idea how these cells work?"

"Now, Sigyn. Don't tell me you're going to break in and out of the dungeon."

"I only asked a question." She walked over to the dungeon wall. No controls, no levers, no hint to how the barriers were sustained..

"Some sort of spell, I imagine, but none I know." Loki watched her, gripping his hands together as she continued smoothing her hand over the wall. "Sigyn," He called, "You should leave."

She stopped. "What?"

"Leave, Sigyn."

"I've only just got here.."

"It's not safe."

"But-"

"The guards are coming on patrol. Unless you would like a cell of your own, you must leave."

She looked at him one last time. Sure enough, the sound of footsteps echoed through the dungeon. She hadn't noticed.

"I love you," She grasped her hood.

He gazed down at her, his breath heavier. "..I love you too, Sigyn. Now go."

~~~~

Sigyn left the dungeons completely unnoticed. She meandered through the palace, stopping near the throne room. Checked to make sure she was alone before pulling down her hood and gazing out a window at the city. Her heart still felt giddy, her hands still a bit shaky after finally speaking with him - it took everything in her not to shout for joy.

I'll find a way to free you, Loki. You'll be safe here. The Nine Realms are protected, our family is back together again. We even have Jane now - everything is better than it was before. She sighed happily, taking in deep, relaxed breaths between small fits of laughter. It will be okay. Everything will be okay-

Alarms sounded.

The prison alarms.

Her hair stood on end, her heart skipping once before pounding in her chest.

Loki.

Had he found a way out?

Guards hurried, battalions forming and marching to report to the king. They wouldn’t rally so many just to stop him… We’re under attack.

Sigyn followed. She caught a glimpse of Frigga and Jane walking away.

Good. Frigga will keep her safe.

"Allfather?" Sigyn caught up with Odin. He turned, facing her. "Allfather - how can I help?"

"You can stay out harm's way."

Sigyn huffed, "I want to help."

"Sigyn, you have little experience in battle, and no weapon to speak of. The best you can do is stay safe."

She wanted to argue. To help, to fight whatever was attacking her home - but instead she nodded, backing down. An argument between her and Odin was the last thing everyone needed. "Very well, as you wish.."

Odin seemed vaguely impressed as she turned, leaving. Not knowing where Frigga and Jane were, Sigyn went up to a room she knew healers would be hiding in - and sure enough, many were there, looking bewildered. She closed the door, standing before them.

"The Allfather will protect us. We are to remain here."

Countless explosions sounded from outside. The entire room shook as something attacked - no, bombarded the palace.

The servants looked to Sigyn. As princess, she was highest in command among them.. Though she’d hardly led anyone before.

"Don’t fret," She assured them again, "We will be safe here."

They waited.

And waited.

Holed up in the quiet healing room, listening to muffled explosions from outside.

Sigyn couldn't decide if it was better or worse to be waiting, rather than in battle - at least out there, she might see what was going on. Eventually, the deep hum of a ship flying away suggested they could leave.

Sigyn walked to the door, opening it. Paused. "It's safe."

Making her way to the throne room, her breath grew unsteady.

Bodies. Bodies everywhere, littering the floor with blood and decay. A ship had crashed into the throne room. Countless pillars of stone toppled over, the dust still settling over the ruin.

The throne of Asgard, half destroyed. More bodies laid strewn about before it.

She swallowed, looking at each of them pointedly. Rest well. You fought bravely.

She looked around her. Not a soul. Where are they all?

She searched the castle, catching sight of Thor and Jane. They were safe.

"There you are!" She stopped in front of them. "Where is everyone, brother?"

Thor gazed down at her.

Sigyn's brow immediately furrowed and her stomach churned. He had the same grim look she'd seen over a year ago, when he'd returned from the Bifrost with Odin. But now it somehow looked more certain. More real. More… Enraged.

"Thor...?"

"Sigyn, come, there is.. No way to put this lightly."

~~~~

Frigga was dead. Gone.

Dark elves had attacked and murdered her, along with countless others. Dark elves of Svartalfheim - an enemy they were told had been slaughtered by King Bor eons ago.

Yet another lie that had cost her family everything.

So many lives lost.

Her life lost.

Sigyn sat by a window, weeping quietly. Grief came in waves, washing over her relentlessly, one after the other.

If I'd followed them, her and Jane, things might be different.

I should've followed them. I should've helped them. I should’ve known how to fight.

She gripped the folds of her cloak, sniffling. Squeezing her eyes shut.

Mother, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry I wasn't there for you. I should've been there to defend you.

Sigyn opened her eyes again, gazing out the window.

I miss you already.

~~~~

That night, a funeral was held. Sigyn begged Odin to let Loki attend.

He refused, and forbade she try to tell him herself.

She knew it was too risky to go see Loki now. Frigga was no longer there to vouch for her - one wrong step, and Odin may have Loki executed for all she knew...

So Sigyn stood alongside Thor and Jane, clutching her necklace with white knuckles. Watched as boats, carrying the deceased, drifted peacefully by. There were so many boats... Too many.

A flaming arrow was lit, sent flying out to meet Frigga's boat. Flames consumed it. Then more arrows flew and met the other boats, flames growing. Burning.

As Frigga's boat drifted to the edge of the sea, Odin beat Gungnir on the ground, and her body turned to stardust, floating up into the sky.

Sigyn's gaze followed them.

An ocean of stars. Billions of shining lights, the same she and Loki once lied under. The same she once asked Frigga about.

I miss you, Frigga. A tear ran down her cheek as hundreds of lights were released, each drifting to the sky. Stars in their own right.

I will keep your son Loki safe. Give him your love and mine, love him more than I ever have before. I will help Thor, and Jane, the mortal. I promise, I will do you proud. Even if you were not my birth mother,

She swallowed,

You were a mother to me.

#loki x sigyn #loki fanfic #logyn #OG616 #thor: the dark world

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themissingmarvel · 4 years

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Kind Regards, Detective [Part 8]

(I am going to prompt this with first, an apology for how long it’s been. I blame Animal Crossing as well as the apocalypse. That said, and this is a TW/CW there is a major death. So be advised.)

CATCH UP: [Part 1] // [Part 2] // [Drabble] // [Part 3] // [Part 4] // [Drabble 2] // [Part 5] // [Part 6] // [Part 7]

Pairing: Detective Loki x fbi!Reader

Word Count: 3.1k

Warnings: Language, descriptions of violence, major character death

They didn’t fall asleep right away. Which made sense on many levels. She was still shaken and he was still quite taken with the woman in his arms, who he had dreamed of namelessly for so long. She was already a dream. But that was dangerous, and he knew it.

She told him stories of training in the bureau, and what she had encountered. Being a woman and an agent was never easy. He told her stories about when he started off as a beat cop and his first time arresting someone back when he worked in Philadelphia. He talked about having seen so much and knowing what he did, he wanted to bring his work to an area that didn’t always get attention. That needed good cops. Conyers had been that place.

Her words were shaky when she discussed the loss of her sister, and that was what the CD had been in reference to. David had lost so much in his life so young he supposed he didn’t really understand that kind of pain the way he wanted to. He hadn’t ever loved something like that before. He had felt adrift, a ship without an anchor. Love was a memory to him and he dreamed of it sometimes so hard he could taste it.

When they did finally fall asleep, David had buried himself against her and they had managed to look disgustingly adorable in a way neither would ever admit to, even in a court of law. Y/N had prided herself on her ability to keep work separate. It helped that at least once a month she’d spend a couple days out of town. Sometimes longer. Meant she had good excuses for staying settled. David had no such excuse save for his own emotional damage as a child and teen.

Her phone was what stirred her from sleep, sleep that rarely came so deeply. The phone was by her bed, the issued FBI one she was sure was being tracked but didn’t much care. Breaking away from the warm embrace of the man who had no business being as wonderful as he was, she fumbled for it before answering, not registering the emergency ring, “Agent Y/L/N. Yes, that’s what I said. Wait, what?”

Loki had stirred when she woke, though more so as he watched her suddenly sit up, pushing back her hair that had become quite a mess. He was almost hurt he didn’t get a chance to see her as she woke. A soft waking. Not this.

Already she was on her feet, “No. That’s incorrect. I’m still in New York, the drive was a nightmare so I decided to stay at a hotel and- it doesn’t matter. Check my phone records, I never-!”

She was silent, David sitting up as he watched her, a frantic look suddenly dissipating from her delicate features, her skin pale, eyes wide, looking like a deer in headlights. So far he had found that answering the phone was not ending well for either of them.

He was adjusting his own hair, standing and going for his shirt and belt, watching as she pulled the phone away to look at the screen.

By now she had adjusted to this sort of new normal. Henry Best was not a shy man and she suspected that for a long time he had been killing people. For whatever reason, it had escalated the past few months and she was certain when they looked at patterns statewide, they would find a broader, less direct pattern. No roses, but perhaps notes. Ones discarded. A disappearance and a body found days or weeks later would be easily dismissed by an overworked department.

Closing her eyes tightly, she took a breath before lifting the phone back to her ear, “When was he found? Yeah, check the hotel records I don’t give a fuck. You think I seriously killed my own coworker?! Tell Kendrick to call me himself, then!” She pulled the phone back and hung it up.

It was six in the morning, and she supposed the few hours of sleep they had gotten was a blessing, but one she would regret. She would speak at the funeral later and try not to loudly blame herself, but it would be hard not to. She hadn’t pulled the trigger but she had left a loaded gun on the table just the same. She had let David in and in turn let other parts of herself go.

David was quiet before he spoke, “What happened?”

What a stupid question. It was met by a look of anger he didn’t recognize immediately but knew as rage. It was a powerful kind of rage that clouded judgment and made people do stupid things. He hoped it was the kind of rage Y/N could reign in and use as fuel but he wasn’t sure. He didn’t know enough. He knew fragments and pieces and he hoped she could keep herself together. Keller Dover had let that rage nearly destroy him and almost got himself killed. It was personal.

“Adrian is dead. They found his body in the parking lot of an empty office building, two shots to the chest. They found texts on his phone from me, though we both know it wasn’t. It was ‘me’, asking to meet him with important information I was ‘too scared’ to speak over the phone. Adrian died alone, bleeding to death in a parking lot because of me.”

Her face was stoic, eyes cold and echoing of something akin to heartbreak. She didn’t love Adrian. Not really. But she liked him. She liked how he flirted and made her feel cute, how he called her ‘ladybug’ and would grin even through the phone. Even when he was such a fucking asshole, blowing off her requests for meeting up or talking about his dates… she knew. He wasn’t a bad man, he was kind of a dick, but he sure as hell didn’t deserve to die. But she had killed him, hadn’t she? Maybe she didn’t pull the trigger but she left the gun on the table.

When her sister died, long ago, rage had taken the place of sadness and grief. She had felt anger like no other that the world would have reached out and taken her sister from her. It wasn’t fair. Life wasn’t fair. Sadness was so hard to manage but rage and anger was always so much more reasonable, in an odd way. Sadness you had to cope with but rage you could channel elsewhere. It also made you stupid as hell.

Loki was walking to where Y/N was, reaching for her arm before she snatched it away, “Hey, this isn’t your fault, we both know-”

“But it is!” She stared at him, eyes wide and deadly cool, “It is my fault, David. I thought that this,” she gestured between the two of them, “was a good idea. And it wasn’t. Henry got my phone credentials somehow and he got to Adrian.”

David stepped back, absorbing the blow that hit him right in the chest. She hadn’t meant to hurt him, but when a wounded cat is cornered and injured it will always lash out, even at what it loves the most. She was defending herself. Somewhere he knew that, in the same way he knew he would be doing the same, were he in her position. But he allowed it to sink, instead stepping away and getting himself dressed.

He was cautious as he watched her solemnly get dressed, do her hair as best she could before silently stepping into the bathroom to use the crappy-but-acceptable toothbrush and toothpaste provided. Her brain was trying to process what just happened, but so was David’s. He was reeling from the pain of being told he was a mistake, and because he knew that she didn’t mean it. He hoped she didn’t. He felt responsible as well, that he had distracted her from the case. Perhaps, he thought, it might give him clarity to have the step back that she didn’t.

If Henry had reached out to Adrian, it was because he knew a few things. First, he knew that Adrian provided Y/N with information frequently enough that he had access to quite a bit of data. He probably knew more than he even realized he knew, and he was a risk. Also, Henry knew that Adrian trusted Y/N completely. Enough that he’d simply drive in the middle of the night to meet up with her over a simple text. But doesn’t the FBI train better?

Suddenly it was David working like a profiler, and perhaps it was the brain of the woman he had slept next to that was rubbing off on him.

It didn’t make sense that Adrian would just trust a text message from Y/N, did it?

Looking down at his own phone, he scanned through a few missed calls and voicemails, a text or two from guys at the precinct. Opening his work mail, he noted a few important forensic items and tabbed them for later. One that stood out was the email that the PAM shots had come in.

When Y/N came out she was silent, her words feeling like pain, should she utter them. Instead, she grabbed her things, hardly looking at David as she felt the weight of the boulder she had decided to shoulder pressing down on her before breathing out the words, “Let’s go.”

___

The drive itself hadn’t taken long, all things considered. Y/N had insisted she drive her own car, the reliable car that felt reliably foreign, making her feel like an alien in a world she was supposed to be part of. Adrian didn’t deserve to die. Arguably, most folks didn’t, really. He was a good guy, though. He did the stuff you were supposed to do. Being an asshole wasn’t a reason to off someone and yet Henry (and she was sure it was Henry) had chosen him specifically. Whether or not it was because he ‘knew’ something, it was calculated. Gunshots, however, meant this was not as planned as he had wanted it to be. Something had been off. Emotions had been involved. This had been a crime of passion and not a single note was left behind. Not a single rose.

He wasn’t the pattern, though. So it made sense.

Pulling up to the precinct, she got out and made her way to the door, aware of Detective Loki only steps behind her, protective in a way he didn’t like, even for himself. Henry was bold, however. Further forensics on the phone had shown Y/N’s phone had been cloned, of course. She supposed handing the man her jacket in his office where he had defense level technology hadn’t been her smartest move.

She had to play chess and make him think she was still playing checkers.

“Agent? This was delivered about an hour ago, one of the DC Agents dropped it himself. Credentials checked out. It’s for you.” A young man was behind the precinct desk, looking a little tired but otherwise unbothered, handing her a small package. She was curious, though not concerned this time, able to spot the small sticker on the bottom left of a glittering ladybug.

Taking the box she glanced at David and nodded her head towards the long hallway that led towards the interrogation rooms. She was silent, moving like a whisper over the ugly rug in the dingy department that desperately needed an upgrade. Opening the door to the other side of the one-way mirror, she removed her jacket and her phone, David following suit. It was eerie, how silent she was, even her movements noiseless as she fiddled with the microphone settings and turned off all recording devices. She went so far as to power them off entirely, making the room dark.

Shutting the door, the young woman gently opened the box and withdrew a sleek, silver Samsung Galaxy, definitely not government issue. Squinting, she pressed the power button and turned it on, the phone booting up with no problem, the background a picture of a ladybug. She couldn’t help but roll her eyes and smirk through the pain, “Subtle, as always.”

Sitting down, David took a seat by her, watching as the phone appeared to begin on its own, the woman taking the cue to prop it up and sit back, the two close by once more as they watched a video begin.

“I know. This isn’t subtle, right? I mean, if you’re watching it then it’s not supposed to be. After what Henry did, I didn’t want you getting another package and being scared again.”

It was Adrian, his face, brown scruff over his handsome features, sharp jawline and broad shoulders visible, stunning hazel eyes that were arguably more green than hazel visible. His hair was dark brown as well, normally gelled down and styled, though a bit more tussled now. He was sitting in his apartment, what looked to be his apartment. Pictures of his family were behind him and he was sitting on his couch, beige… funny the things we choose to see.

“He texted me tonight. I mean, you did, from what police records will show, but it’s him. He’s gotta think I’m some next-level idiot, you know? He tried to get your tone down but he can’t get that icy exterior quite right,” he smirked, looking into the camera, Y/N’s eyes softened as she knew she was watching the final moments of a man’s life. You don’t turn away from something like that.

“It’s my fault… I’m sorry.” She whispered as she watched the video, her body caving in on itself as she felt herself tense.

“And before you apologize, don’t! Hey, for all I know, things turned out just fine and you’re gonna make fun of me for this video and I’ll get the credit for catching The Black Rose! I won’t let you live it down,” he smirked.

Tears burned at her eyes, holding a hand over her mouth to stop herself from speaking again, almost wounded by how eerie it was how well he knew her. It fucking hurt.

“I can’t call you on your phone because it’ll route to his. He has authority over it by now, so don’t trust it, whatever you read on it. It’s useless. I used this because I knew I could jailbreak it and install the firmware to keep him out. But yeah, this’ll be pretty useless too if he gets wind of it.

“Anyway. He wants to meet me. I figure if I can get some recordings of him in the parking lot, maybe clone his phone myself without him knowing, maybe I can get something off him for you. If not, if you’re watching this and feeling like shit… it means it’s a good thing I sent the phone. Because if you’re watching this, much like those tropes I know you hate, then I’m dead, Ladybug. And I’m sorry for that one. But it sure as hell isn’t your responsibility and you need to know I’m doing this because I chose to. You’ve always been the brave one, Y/N. I’ve watched you take hits from assholes, get threatened, travel across the country, work yourself through hell on earth… you’re brave. You’re good at your job. And you always deserved better than me. Doesn’t make much sense to tell you I always loved you, so I won’t. But I’m doing this not for you, but because of you. Catch the asshole.”

The video closed, another taking its place, this one far grainier and from within a spot on the dash of Adrian’s car. It was a shitty camera, one that would be found, quite obviously, and that was broadcasting a recording. Later they’d find out not even Henry could trace the broadcast, but Y/N knew. David knew. Both knew as they sat in the dark interview room in the Conyers precinct.

The audio was muffled and quiet, which made sense. It wouldn’t have mattered anyway. But it showed Adrian getting out of the car, jacket on, walking over with his hands up. He was speaking, softly, and staying still as another man entered view.

Henry.

He had his hands in his pockets, though he was visible. His head. Face. Hair. Unmistakably Henry Best. It was like watching a horror movie, though, and she hadn’t even realized that David had wrapped an arm around her waist, pulled himself to her, ready to stop the video at any moment.

Shouts were exchanged suddenly, Henry barking at Adrian who stepped back, his hands still up, shaking his head and looking almost quizzical as he tilted his head to the side, “-her…-?” It was barely audible, though Henry’s face contorted into anger, rage, pulling a gun out of his pocket suddenly and screaming, “You could never understand my love for her!”

One shot. Two shots. Three shots.

Each made Y/N jump, tears in her eyes as she watched her friend, one of her closest friends, the man she trusted, shot dead in front of her, the feed suddenly cutting out.

The video closed, leaving only the phone with its basic desktop icons before them, Y/N reaching out and gently picking up the phone, “You fucking idiot, Adrian.” Tears were falling down her cheeks, not that she cared. And even Adrian’s promise that his death was not on her was not enough. The guilt was tremendous and suddenly she felt like she was the one speeding down the highway and popping a tire. She felt everything spinning out of control and she wondered if this was the same kind of end her sister had met. Chaos. Loss. Helplessness. Blame.

It was the icon in the bottom of the screen, however, that snapped her back, looking down at the icon that was only black but was titled all she needed:

“EVIDENCE”.

His last gift was not a video of his death, but rather, Adrian had ensured, was a gift of life and a promise of revenge against the man who had done so much. And, perhaps, a warning of something more sinister.

(Tagging: @escapingthoughtsandsecrets @is-it-madness @detecellie @doritosandavocados @oscarflysaac @peccobagnaia @miss-missing-patd @hockeyandheroes )

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spacesuitsforemergency · 3 years

Text

Sole Survivor

Note: This is the angstiest shit I’ve personally written, so warning you’ll probably cry. Also it’s kinda long sorry just a lot of important stuff about Nina’s story now

“May the Valkyries welcome you and lead you through Odin's great battlefield.”

Nina slowly approached the boat as she began reciting the prayer, one that’s been used for generations of fallen Vikings. Wayde wasn’t a Viking, or Norse nor had he converted to paganism, but he always talked about how if he died he wouldn’t want a boring burial where you just rot in the ground. Nina had asked Waydes fathers if it would be okay to give him a traditional funeral of her culture, which they both agreed would be best, since it sounded like something Wayde would’ve been into. So Nina, some of her family and Wayde’s parents and some other X-Men had all joined her at the spot where she originally let go of her family, now she was letting go of the love of her life.

“May they sing your name with love and fury, so that we might hear it rise from the depths of Valhalla and know that you've taken your rightful place at the table of kings.”

She watched as Wade gently set down Wayde’s katana’s in the boat next to his covered body. Nathan set down Wayde’s stupid pink unicorn shirt, one he insisted on wearing over his suit for many missions. Nina then placed a kiss on a silver ring before carefully resting it atop Wayde’s chest. It had been their promise ring, their promise to each other that they’d stay best friends, and eventually it turned into a promise to marry each other once they were older. Nina now kept hers on her ring finger, it’s was a simple silver, gold and rose gold bands twisted together, a traditional Russian ring that Wayde had given her. She remembered him getting down on one knee and being all dramatic about it and she had laughed at him, and now she wish she didn’t. Now she wished she had just smiled instead.

“For a great man has fallen: A son. A warrior. A survivor. A friend.”

Nina didn’t understand. If she hadn’t let him get captured, if she had figured out a way to get the inhibitor collar off, Wayde would still be alive. Nina mindlessly spoke the prayers as she stepped back towards her own family, her thoughts only clouded with the memory of watching Wayde die in her arms, all life and energy fading from his eyes. He had told her not to cry and had asked her to talk to him, so she held the tears in for him and quietly spoke to him, reminding him of the ridiculous adventures they’d been on together. She had sent a help signal out earlier so her father had ran in, seeing Nina asking a limp Wayde why he wasn’t healing himself and why he didn’t answer her question. She hadn’t cried, which he assumed was shock and that she hadn’t realized he was dead yet. But she didn’t cry the rest of the day, not that night, not while preparing for his funeral. She just...didn’t react.

“Lo there do I see my father, my mother, and my brothers and my sisters. Lo there do I see the line of my people back from the beginning. Lo they do call me. Lo they bid me take my place among them in the hallowed halls of Valhalla...where the enemies have been vanquished...where the brave shall live forever.”

She watched as Wade, Nathan, Colossus and Wolverine gently pushed the boat out onto the water, then they all picked up a torch and tossed it into the boat. Nina picked hers up and continued the prayer with a scarily monotone voice as she set her torch in the boat, watching it go up in flames. They all watched as the boat slowly sailed away, everyone slowly leaving. Wade and Nathan pat her shoulder and thanked her for the service before going their separate ways. The rest of the X-Men paid their respects before leaving as well, then Nina’s family hesitantly left. She had told them before that she would be there a long time, she had a lot to think about and a lot left to say. Akira hugged her, despite her not responding at all, before telling her to not be too late, and leaving her to grieve.

Nina looked up at the sky, angry at the Gods for taking him away. Why did everyone she loved have to die? Her parents, her sisters, her beloved brother, Nadia Angeloff, and now her best friend and love of her life. What more could they take from her? What more did they want from her? She had fought her whole life and faced so many challenges, why did she need to prove herself further? Why her? She hasn’t done anything wrong, she just wanted to be happy, but something always kept happening to those she loved. It was as if she was cursed, as if everything she touched would die, and she didn’t know how much more she could take of it. She had a new family now, were they going to take them all from her too?

Nina let out a scream of agony and grief as she fell to her knees, sobbing into herself. She had never cried before in her life, but she had held so much in for so many years that she just couldn’t take it anymore. All of it was too much to handle, she bottled up so much suffering and torment that at that moment it exploded, and she felt helpless and alone. She didn’t know what to do without Wayde, he was the only person besides her family she had ever trusted. She trusted him enough to tell him everything that happened to her in her life, everything she thought or felt. She had no one anymore, and now she was determined to keep it that way. She wasn’t ever going to open herself up to anyone ever again, she would never allow herself to love someone more than herself, because in the end she would always be alone. Forever.

But such is a life of a sole survivor.

Nina silently vowed to herself that she would never allow herself to love again, she couldn’t go through this again. Now her only priority was to keep her remaining family safe, so that she wouldn’t be alone anymore. She vowed that her heart only belonged to Wayde, and she would never give it to someone else. She slowly began to walk away, whispering the final part of the prayer.

“May Odin give you knowledge on your path.”

“May Thor grant you strength and courage on your way.”

“And may Loki give you laughter as you go.”

“Goodbye, my love.”

#nina kozlovsky yamisoka #wayde wilson #mr and mrs massacre #misses massacre

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have-a-hiddles · 3 years

Text

Tagged by @eyanril, so I’m following her format.

Rules: List the first and last lines of your last 20 stories (if you have less than 20, just list them all!) See if there are any patterns. Then tag 10 authors!

Tagging: @juniorstarcatcherfiction, @oh-great-authoress, @britinthewoods, @ngoc12thefangirl, @bighound-littlebird, @phelfromgrace, @maulfrk, @dying-suffering-french-stalkers, and anyone else who wants.

-----------------------------------------------

1) A Perfect Storm (Fandom: Star Wars, Subject: Hux and Rose stranded on Crait, Character(s): Hux/Rose )

All too-familiar aching pain raced across his entire frame as Hux gasped a ragged breath down his bruised throat. // The wars might go on out there, among the stars, but for them, everything to come would be very different, no matter what they discovered.

2) The Dangers Of Nar Shadda Casinos (Fandom: Star Wars, Subject: Posing as a couple on Nar Shadda, Character(s): Hux/Rose )

Rose hurries down a roughhewn street, although she tries to not look like she is hurrying. // He can.

3) A Change Of Mind (Fandom: Star Wars, Subject: Hux making his decision to turn against Kylo, Character(s): Hux, Pryde, Palpatine)

Hux swallowed hard, watching the set of Allegiant General Pryde’s shoulders as the older man watched the Supreme Leader’s antics amidst the smoke and ruin of Mustafar. // But he would never answer to a Sith Lord again.

4) A Drop Of Water And A Little Pity (Fandom: Hunchback of Notre Dame, Subject: Quasimodo's thoughts and feelings while on the pillory, Character(s): Quasimodo, Esmeralda, Frollo)

He looked down at the cracking, wooden floorboards that supported him, trying desperately not to think about the slice of leather and metal across his back. // “Belle…”

5) A Rose Among Thorns (Fandom: Star Wars, Subject: Rose is Hux's handler while he spies for the Resistance, Character(s): Rose/Hux)

“Say that again?” Rose demanded, her voice was somewhat drowned out amid the bustle of Ajan Kloss. // Life and, as it turned out, love was what had happened while they had been busy making other plans.

6) Fate Decided And Dawning (Fandom: Star Wars, Subject: Ben and Rey making and trying out their new lightsabers, Character(s): Ben/Rey)

Despite his attempts to burnish the lightsaber pommel’s greyish finish to a silvery shine, it remained weather worn. // They both waved to BB-8's strident burbling welcome as they returned to the ship that for now, they called home, just as the stars began to shine brightly above them.

7) Interlude: Of Desire And Decision (Fandom: Star Wars, Subject: Hux and Seela finally get to consumate their relationship, Character(s): Hux/OFC)

One of the perks of being on the Tantive was that just about everything one could need was within a short walking distance. // "I will never stop loving you.”

8) Memory Past And Pursued (Fandom: Star Wars, Subject: Rey is seduced by Ben proficiency in the kitchen bay, Character(s): Ben/Rey)

"Never thought I'd miss my calligraphy set," Ben mused. // Ben curled around her, cradling them together in a kind of nest, as they drifted into a dreamless, contented sleep.

9) Howling Of the Heart (Fandom: Game of Thrones, Subject: Sandor survives and is pissed about it, Character(s): Sandor/Sansa, Arya, Bran, assorted OCs)

Everything was burning. // It suited him well enough; he didn't care for those types of games anyway, and he knew he could face any reservations they'd express... if they dared to.

10) Interlude: Of Help And Healing (Fandom: Star Wars, Subject: Hux has surgery and Seela helps him recover, Character(s): Hux/OFC)

Seela hung up her flight jacket, leaving her in a sleeveless top and some loose fatigue pants. // "Love... your mother could well be alive!"

11) Love Forged And Forgiven (Fandom: Star Wars, Subject: Everyone's leaving Ajan Kloss and loose ends need to be tied up, Character(s): Finn/Poe, Ben/Rey, Hux/OFC)

Finn didn’t move. // "I'll never let you go, sweetheart."

12) Interlude: Secrets And Sharing (Fandom: Star Wars, Subject: Aftermatch of Leia's funeral, Character(s): Hux/OFC)

"You did good out there, Armie," Seela said as they headed back to the hangar to continue inventory and putting together supply packs for those leaving soon. // She actually laughed in shock for a second before catching him in a sweet kiss. "I love you, too freykaa."

13) Hope Remembered And Renewed (Fandom: Star Wars, Subject: Leia's funeral/memorial, Character(s): Ben/Rey, Hux/OFC, Poe)

"You should attend, Armie," Seela urged. // Something we finally have enough of.

14) Interlude: Of Chaos And Caring (Fandom: Star Wars, Subject: Bunch of vigniettes after Voices Within and Without, Character(s): Hux/OFC, Ben/Rey, Finn, Poe, Kaydel)

The realization that he should be dead hit him harder than a blaster bolt. // And for the first time, Armitage Hux felt hope.

15) Voices Within And Without (Fandom: Star Wars, Subject: Ben Solo deserved better, Character(s): Ben/Rey)

What parts of his body that he could feel were in agony as he scrambled for purchase on the jagged rockface. // “Wow. You have no room to be twitting me about Ben.”

16) Why The Caged Bird Sings (Fandom: Game of Thrones, Subject: Sandor and Sansa make love AFTER the battle against the dead, Character(s): Sandor/Sansa)

Sitting at the high table in the great hall of Winterfell, Sansa struggled to sort out her emotions following their narrow victory against the Army of the Dead. // "Ah, fuck me!" he swore in disgust.

17) The Curious Incident Of The Dog In The Night (Fandom: Game of Thrones, Subject: Sandor and Sansa make love BEFORE the battle against the dead, Character(s): Sandor/Sansa)

Sansa took a deep breath, watching the cloudy vapor swirl above her face. // So help her, Seven; if she managed to live through the rest of this night, she was going to find Sandor Clegane and she was going to make her dreams real.

18) Of This, Our Time (Fandom: Hiddlestoners, Subject: Shameless self-insert fantasy, Character(s): Tom Hiddleston/thinly veiled version of the author)

He was definitely lost and that was not a good thing; especially since the August evening sky was gloomy with rain clouds. // Very soon...

19) Mating Habits (Fandom: Hiddlestoners, Subject: Tom is a museum curator, Character(s): Tom Hiddleston/OFC)

Free museum days were fantastic. // “Wild Irish Elks couldn't stop me.”

20) Soothe the Savage Beast (Fandom: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Subject: Introducing Sigyn!, Character(s): Loki/Sigyn, Odin, Thor, Frigga)

Sometimes she wished she’d never come to the palace, that she’d stayed in her little village in Vanaheim, safe with her own people. // "We will face it. Head on. Together."

----------------------------------------

Patterns: I seem to like "establishing shots" for opening lines and maybe somewhat abrupt ending lines.

Fave Opening Line: “Say that again?” Rose demanded, her voice was somewhat drowned out amid the bustle of Ajan Kloss. I just like how it opens in the middle of conversation. Way to toss the audience in without their swimmies.

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saieras · 5 years

Text

21 THINGS I LOVED ABOUT ENDGAME

HEAVY SPOILERS. I always tag #endgame spoilers, so make sure to block that if you haven’t

1. THE FIRST 20 MINS

Expectations? Chuck them out the window. They weren’t kidding when they said all promotional material came from the first 20 mins!!! I loved how they got right into the thick of things, cameras blazing, completely no nonsense. And CAROL omg. Also I did NOT expect Thanos’ death to be, Just Like That.

2. The Time Jump.

Very, very smart move. I liked everything about the time jump. It lets us view the event with a lens of a world shattered, a world that has had the chance to come to its senses and reel from the catastrophe.

Although it might have other implications for FFH (like, how the hell is Ned still in Peter's class if he survived? Unless the entire decathlon team got dusted together, which, hey, kinda depressing but like they say, People who decathlon together, Dust together!)

3. Intro of Thor and Clint

The cinematographic shift, including atmosphere and music, was a bit jarring, but I quite liked it. And Korg and Meek! Just hanging out

Although I’m curious, why didn’t y’all give Thor body hair? He’s got a wild beard, a dadbod with a beerbelly... He ought to have a hairy chest/stomach! Same with Clint. That japanese dude Clint killed was still speaking after his throat got slit. Wut.

4. Scott Lang.

Just. Every joke he made. Fantastic.

But also I did not expect to shed my first tear at his and Cassie’s reunion. That was great.

5. Morgan. Tony and Morgan. Tony and Peter’s photo.

Domestic Tony. So soft. AND THAT PHOTO WAS HIS. In HIS HOUSE. FRAMED. I REALLY wish we got more but that moment was very powerful. Still, I was unsatisfied. I wanted Tony to cry. I wanted Morgan to also know about Peter. Basically I want more canonical proof of Irondad Spiderson. Like, listen, this is the one loss that haunts Tony to this day. Peter’s death was the kind of pain that made Tony terrified of going again, for fear of losing Morgan.

6. THE NYC SCENE.

ALL of it. From Tony the security guard, to him talking shit about his own deodorant, to him giving himself a cardiac arrest to cause a diversion and being like this is fine, nothing to see here. And Hulk vs stairs. And STEEB. OMG STEEB. “Hail Hydra.“ “I’ve got visuals on Loki.” “I can do this all da--“ “Yeah. I know. I know.“

“Bucky... Is... ALIVE“

And butt jokes. So many Steve buttjokes. I don’t ship stony, but that is the closest y’all will get to a stony suggestive scene.

ALSO LOKI just yeeting himself outta there. That’s ma boi!

7. Frigga and Thor.

Nuff said. Mama Frigga is the best.

8. Tony and Howard.

It’s really great how adorable Tony was throughout this scene. And... while Howard was NOT redeemed, it’s nice to know he did love his son. And it’s great that Tony got some closure.

9. Peggy and Steve.

Out of the Big Three’s scenes with their “significant past people”, this one was the least impactful for me, as they didn’t even talk, BUT in retrospect it set the scene for later perfectly.

10. Gamora saves the day!

This is GREAT and showcases her character very well, who she really is despite who Thanos raised her to be.

11. Clint and Natasha

Their friendship was on full display during this film. Their scenes. And how it was all platonic. The entire audience knew, as soon as they landed on Vormir, that one of them wasn’t going to make it.

12. Just, Natasha in general.

She’s really been allowed to SHINE in this film. ScarJo is finally allowed to act! Like, thank god. About time she snapped out of her resting impassive smirkface. I love the humanity we got to see out of Natasha as a result. And her heading the command center for a post-Snap Avengers is very apt for her.

13. THE BIG 3 FIGHT THANOS

There are many, many things to love here. But Thor wielding both weapons was amazing, them teaming up their powers with lightning and Tony’s tech, and STEEB with MJOLNIR allowed him to perform SO many cool tricks. Like playing vibranium squash with the shield. So fluid. That fight scene was something else.

14. THE ENTRANCE OF THE HEROES

Assembling for the final fight. I didn’t like how it turned into a slugfest (again), but that moment of hope when Sam hails Steve... Damn.

15. MY BABY BOY PETER

So proud of him. The way he flips in, and is instantly like Woah this is a Big Fight!! How we focus on him for a large part of the battle. How he’s running through the field with the gauntlet, and people all around him coming to help him.

16. Carol’s entrance.

She singlehandedly destroyed that purple grape’s hopes and shat all over his precious spaceship. That’s our girl!

17. “Hey Peter Parker. Got something for me?”

CAROL. CArol listen. You are his mom now. That’s how it works with that damn kid. That’s how he ended up with a whole fucking team of parents.

It be like that sometimes.

18. The LADIES of MARVEL

THEY ARE AMAZING. I fully expect a gifset when the bluray is out. Every one of them. Also the way they gathered around Peter, so soft yet so badass at the same time!

Also RESCUE. OMG. PEPP. And the battlefield fighting side by side with Tony.

19. The passing on of mantles

Steve to Sam (SO glad he didnt get passed over for bucky), Thor to Valkyrie, and Tony to Pepper. These are their legacies. And they’re very skillfully done.

I forgot to add that Steve’s choice to remain in the past and grow old is an EXTREMELY tasteful move. It completes his character arc, fulfilled his dreams from back during the CA First Avenger, and eases him out of the main picture without giving us more heartbreak. It’s sad, yes, but the kind of sad that is also laced with contentment and happiness. This is what he deserves.

20. Tony’s send-off.

His death. I was glad Pepper was the last one there, to tell him it’s okay, they’ll be fine, he can let go.

AND PETER. Peter was there, trying to talk to him, sobbing and breaking down. This is what I wanted, going in, if Tony were to die. And this is what I got. You just know this is going to haunt him in FFH.

And Tony himself. His immense sacrifice, the moment he knew what he had to do, the moment Strange held up that finger. One way. UGH.

I have to admit I wanted Peter to also be there when they’re playing back Tony’s recording. I like how they otherwise didn’t miss a single member of the IronFam, though, like Rhodey, Happy, Pepper, Morgan, they’re all there. But still, Peter should’ve been.

Also, how could I forget, Harley. He totally had every right to be attending that funeral. And it shows how Tony kept in contact with him.

21. And finally, Tony. RDJ.

Thank you. Beyond all words, Thank you.

This has been one hell of a ride.

How far we’ve come. So, thank you!

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fcrgedstrcngth · 4 years

Text

Frigga

Face-claim: Rene Russo

Status: semi-active

Main verse: canon; post-Avengers

Biography:

Pre-Thor:

Frigga was born the daughter of a relatively inconsequential Vanir nobleman, and a well-respected witch who had turned her focus towards healing – all the better to be accepted by the Vanir. The youngest of a half-dozen children, she spent much of her younger years three steps behind her mother, watching her heal others, and going on to learn the basics of the art for herself. It was her brothers who ensured she knew how to defend herself, how to wield a sword and daggers, and in time she learned how to use her magic defensively as well.

A fact which she was later grateful for, as her people fell into war with the Aesir. The war was trying for the Vanir, and distasteful to them; soon they began to desire peace, and a truce. Bor, at least, wasn’t a totally unreasonable man, and a truce was soon reached – though it came at an unexpected price for Frigga. Bor’s favored son, Odin, the heir to his throne, had taken note of her – or at least of her beauty – in the council rooms while the truce was being outlined. Part of the price of peace was that Frigga moved to Asgard to become Odin’s wife and eventual queen, and for the sake of her beloved people, Frigga agreed.

It was a difficult transition, though not, at least a difficult beginning to a marriage. She came to care for, and eventually love, Odin, but she struggles with Asgardian culture. The violence that was seeped into every aspect of their lives hurt Frigga’s heart, and though her opinions slowly began to change parts of Odin’s outlook, one woman couldn’t change a whole culture.

In time, she turned her thoughts toward more personal things – hers and Odin’s growing desire to have children. However, it was not something that came easily to them – specifically to Frigga, and healers had never yet been able to heal their own bodies.

It was a painful irony, Frigga thought, that her title became that of the “All-Mother” when Odin took the throne, but it became something that she embraced. If she couldn’t have children of her own, why shouldn’t she “adopt” and look out for all of Asgard? That was her title, after all, and from that angle, it was one she was able to embrace. Her unbreakable love for the Vanir remaining, the notion of it made her feel like a fully-integrated Asgardian at long last.

Yet a miracle was waiting just around the corner for the couple. Frigga became pregnant and gave Odin a perfectly healthy miracle son they named Thor. The miracle even happened a second time; she became pregnant again… but it was not to be. This time, the child, a daughter, was born lifeless.

Amid a chaotic time of war with Jotunheim was not the time to grieve, but Frigga couldn’t help it. She took to her bed, she was so inconsolable with grief for her child and a growing hatred for her own body. Odin’s frequent presence in the warfront – and absence from her – did not help, and Thor was the only reason she was kept from abject depression most days.

Then the war with Jotunheim was over and won, and Odin returned to her – bringing much more home than she had ever anticipated. She was sitting in Thor’s nursery, minding her son – as she’d had energy to do little else since the stillbirth – when Odin came in, traces of the battle still on his armor, and placed a blue-eyed baby boy in her arms. An orphan misplaced in the war, he said, their son now, if she desired it so.

She didn’t question it until that night when they lay together in the darkness, unable to see one another’s expression. How had he found an Asgardian infant on Jotunheim? He hadn’t; the child was a Jotun, but well-disguised of the babe’s own accord, and he need never know his true heritage. He could be their second child, and if the time ever came, revealing that a Jotun had been raised in the Asgardian palace might help bring about true peace and partnership with Jotunheim.

After that night, it was never mentioned again, and the boys became equal in Frigga’s heart… though as the years wore on, she noticed that they were not viewed as equals by their peers. So, she took Loki into her personal tutelage; he had shown signs of proficiency in magic even if he didn’t know how much so, and she taught him how to capitalize upon it. How to use his size as a strength all it’s own, more spells than were perhaps necessary – but he was good at it, and she enjoyed the private time spent with boy… even as he became a man.

Even as she and Odin began to disagree more and more on things, as Thor’s childish character flaws remained despite his age, as Loki began to maintain friendships with fewer people than ever. The flaws in her family were beginning to show, and despite being the All-Mother, Frigga didn’t know how to help her three men. So, she loved them all as fiercely as she could, but it didn’t really help, and she felt increasingly powerless against it all.

Thor:

Especially when Odin banished Thor to Midgard, of all places, with none of his powers or any real context of the culture he was entering. She didn’t like to yell at her husband, but she did then – and he ignored her pleas, regardless.

But as bad as the incident with Thor was, he at least returned home changed for the better.

It was Loki whose issues were more difficult to resolve. In going to Jotunheim, he’d met Laufey, and come home and touched the Casket, discovering his true heritage. Odin, she believed, had done his best to answer Loki’s questions, but clearly, they hadn’t been sufficient answers, because Loki had come to her with his questions while they were at Odin’s bedside. Her heart stuttered in her chest as he explained what he’d discovered, she did her best to answer his questions and ease his obvious disquiet. She knew by the look on his face she hadn’t said enough, even as guards came and presented him with Gungnir, making him king until Odin awoke.

She told herself she’d done her best in the moment, but in the end her best clearly wasn’t enough. Loki fell from the Bifrost, and she grieved, swearing to do better – by Thor, by Odin, by her people.

The Avengers:

And she tried to do better… only to have that wound of her grief ripped back open when Loki reappeared, warped and evil, on Midgard.

She tried to tell them – Thor, Odin, Heimdall, all of them – that something wasn’t right with Loki, but again she was ignored, and the second prince of Asgard was brought home in chains and a muzzle. She spent years visiting him periodically, trying to get him to talk about what had happened, what had changed her boy.

Thor: The Dark World:

In the end, her presence was once again for naught – on all counts. When it mattered, Odin ordered even her from the room and sentenced her son to a life in solitary confinement. Once again, she felt all but helpless to do anything about it.

Feeling increasing trapped and useless, Frigga felt her life shrinking down to visiting Loki via her magic, trying to keep Thor content in a life without the presence of his Midgardian love, Dr. Jane Foster, and distressingly, trying to avoid an increasingly unpredictable Odin. Then, Dr. Foster was on Asgard, and under Frigga’s protection, and a terrible, unprecedented opportunity – a chance to rest, and then do some good.

She used her magic to create the necessary glamours, fighting Kurse with a double until he wrung its neck. She left the double where it was, for Thor, Odin, and Jane to find, going so far as to make it appear that she had stopped breathing. It had taken an enormous effort from her magic so suddenly, but so far as Asgard and her family knew, she was dead. She stayed on Asgard to maintain the double until it was sent up in a funeral pier, while simultaneously keeping the glamour of a peasant woman over herself. With the double gone, she allowed herself to rest from draining her magic, then used a bag from the royal treasury to buy a small spaceship.

Post-Thor: The Dark World:

No one ever discovered where the missing money had gone, so that she knew, and so long as she kept up a glamour, Frigga found herself blissfully free to travel wherever she wanted. She healed wherever she went, giving passage and safekeeping sometimes to those who needed it. She felt useful and happy and good again.

Post-Thor: Ragnarok:

But she had never meant for her absence from Asgard to be permanent, only a long vacation, and she would deal with the repercussions of her hasty actions when she returned. After two years, though, she suddenly heard rumors of a new… dictator, a queen, taking over Asgard. Violently. Frigga returned to her ship, and to Asgard, as quickly as possible.

But Asgard was going up in smoke, and she was barely able to find radio waves claiming to be coming from Asgardian refugees. Yet again, she was just too late. Horrified, still shrouded in a glamour, she rescued the few floating, live stragglers that she could and rendezvoused with them under the care of the last remaining Valkyrie. Staying quietly to the sidelines and always disguised, she helped them rebuild on Midgard, hoping that here, calling herself a healer named Gitte, she could find a way to be useful to the downtrodden people who had no idea she was their queen.

Verses:

FROM THIS MOMENT ON: follows canon MCU and Norse Mythology

ROAD LESS TRAVELED: any other AU threads

AUS:

SO MANY WAYS TO BE: (Descendants) queen of a country near, but not brought into, the US of Auradon

EVER EVER AFTER: (Fairytale) queen

BORROWED BABIES: (Foster Care) foster mother

I SOLEMNLY SWEAR THAT I’M UP TO NO GOOD: (Harry Potter) Ravenclaw seventh-year

ALL THAT GLEAMS AND GLITTERS: (Modern) an orthopedic surgeon

ALTERNATIVELY 1902: (Victorian) disguises herself as a nurse whenever she feels like interacting with the Midgardians

GROW UP WITH THE LAND: (Wild West) disguises herself as a nurse whenever she feels like interacting with the Midgardians

FORWARD TO VICTORY: (World War II) a disguises herself as a nurse whenever she feels like interacting with the Midgardians

Starter Call

#(frigga) all-mother #muses

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shieldedsouls · 4 years

Text

this largely covers information in terms of thor learning of and dealing with loki’s mortality. mostly this has to do with thor’s perception of their relationship, but touches on his relationship with frigga as well as her assumed death.

tw for: death, death mention, faked death, anger issues

please message in private if i missed something or you need an extra tag !!

aside from a couple of groups such as the asgardians and olympians, there really aren’t any immortals within the nine realms

jotunns are part of the mortal stock, and i’ll get back to this in the next segment

thor and loki are raised believing they are of the same blood, that they are siblings in every way and they therefore both have eternity to see through together

while it does not go unnoticed that loki sort of ages and grows differently, no one in their group thought much of it beyond general teasing

it DID make thor more protective of his sibling than he might have otherwise been, which really pulls together on how much he still cares in the future after things go wrong

even when he does first find out about loki’s heritage, he’s more angry about the fact they were lied to and trying to calm his sibling down than he is focused on what exactly that means for loki’s lifespan

thor is dealing with so much else happening at the same time that he doesn’t have the ability to process this until much later on.

it isn’t for some time after loki’s fall from the broken bifrost that thor really mourns that his sibling is gone, that he won’t be getting loki back because mortals simply do not pass in the same way immortals can choose to. as far as thor knows, that moment is it, that’s the last time he’s ever going to have a sense of his sibling being around.

then loki shows up again, in midgard of all places, and with a dangerous weapon but something is off about the whole thing and thor is going to find out what so he can bring loki home. loki does a bunch of really shitty/stupid things here, but ultimately he’s unharmed as far as thor is personally concerned, and he’s able to successfully bring his sibling back to asgard in one piece without a terrifyingly heavy reminder loki will still die one day

then loki is imprisoned, and that turns into a sort of new status quo. when thor isn’t off cleaning up messes in the nine, he is trying to get loki’s sentence changed, or trying to visit ( often being blocked permission one way or another by odin ), though he doesn’t have the chance to do either as much as he would like.

when malekith shows up, thor is already trying to deal with protecting jane and figuring out what to do with the aether

frigga actually does a huge amount of emotional damage to him at this point, using an illusion of herself and jane to distract malekith and keep the aether away from him

thor doesn’t find this out until much later, and his grief is very raw and real as he’s spending time thinking she chose to pass on in order to protect jane and the nine

this is why he ultimately still goes to loki and breaks him out

despite them both being very fragile in a lot of ways because of frigga’s decision, thor appreciates getting his sibling out of the damned cell and giving loki an opportunity to prove themself, a chance to protect the nine like thor has always thought they were meant to: together

the plan of apparent treachery goes off beautifully and jane is safe, but thor gets thrown about a bit more than he had expected to

he doesn’t get a chance to tell loki to run before his sibling is being killed by the same person who seemingly killed their mother and thor cannot handle that much loss in such a short time

literally the only reason he gets up and doesn’t absolutely fall apart at this point is because he has to stop malekith, he has to protect the nine to the best of his abilities, or his family’s sacrifices will mean nothing and he can’t disappoint their memories like that

by the time the whole problem with the aether is wrapped up, thor is quietly carrying his grief and realises in that moment he cannot accept becoming king, not for a very long time at least, because all he sees in this set of experiences is where he failed to protect. his only duty up to this point is to protect and defend the nine and its inhabitants, and not being able to save his mother or sibling shakes him to the core so vividly that continuing to protect others is all that will hold him together.

so when odin ( coughdisguisedlokicough ) offers the throne, he can’t accept it. thor feels this desperate need to make up for not being able to do enough for his family, and he retreats into his duties again, buries himself and his pain in saving others, because if he doesn’t, all he’ll want to do is mourn.

when thor finally does find out/realise frigga and loki are both alive, though both hiding in very different ways, he is angry. angry with them for lying, for leaving, and in many ways he handles both situations like a petulant child would.

he throws a fit with frigga, complete with tears and “ how could you do this to our people, to father, to loki and me ” because she’s one of the only things both he and loki care about in equal measure in the entirety of existence

it’s very purposeful to include loki in every mention of himself, because as far as he’s concerned, frigga truly sees them as siblings still the same way he does

he does not do this in public however

this happens in private where she’s been hiding on midgard, resting and recovering from extensive use of her magic

and she ends it with a promise to return home eventually

with loki he exposes the lies with threat of bodily harm and somewhat childish “ yes you are/no i’m not ” kind of banter, outing him in front of everyone

he keeps frigga’s living a secret, tells loki when they are alone because his sibling deserves to know but he won’t reveal her to all of asgard without her being ready to return home to back it up

as for the future, and how thor could or would handle loki dying: he can’t. Straight up, end of story, cannot deal with the fact he is going to one day lose his sibling and it will be real and painful.

every illusion gets him every single time, because thor stops processing beyond oh my stars loki is dead that’s my baby sibling and i couldn’t protect them even though he knows loki cannot live forever

loki might seem to be playing it as a game, and maybe to them it is, but thor’s reactions are always genuine and raw for this reason

he tries very hard to internalise his grief the way he can with most other things, but it has always been different when it comes to loki

and when it comes down to it, there are so many possibilities of how loki is going to pass. It could be in front of him, in battle, of sickness, they could be realms apart; anything could happen, and the thought always terrifies thor

if loki actually dies and it’s in battle, the first thing thor is going to do is beg them to stand up and reveal it as an illusion

that the fight is over and they’re okay they can get up now, that he won’t even get mad this time

the more gruesome/scarring the death, the more hysterically thor responds

thor holding his sibling’s body and literally crying for hours

electricity gathering in the air around them, storms rolling in that are the worst the region/world has seen and he just stays there cradling loki and apologising for not being able to keep them safe

if loki dies from illness or simple old age, thor is there the entire time and is helping them do even the most basic of tasks in hopes that the saving of energy will keep his sibling alive just a little longer

thor taking every jibe and mean word without trying to argue back because he’s just glad loki is still talking at that point

he still cries, so much, because losing his sibling was never going to not hurt

thor making sure to get loki a proper funeral on asgard, the way all their people are supposed to be honored

to welcome them home one last time, to have asgard see his sibling

and never in all his life will thor wish he could follow someone to whatever comes after death, mortal or immortal

#death tw #death mention tw #faked death tw #anger issues tw #( in the storm | headcanons | thor )#[ there's a lot to their relationship #and its Complicated ]#[ but thor really and truly loves loki #to the very core he does ]#( assembled anthology | all headcanons )

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lailannajacobs · 5 years

Text

Beginnings and Ends

Pairing: Loki X Wife reader

Word Count: 3k

Request: Can u do loki and reader wife where she informs him of frigga's death and with the help of her magic she takes him to her mother's funeral..

Warnings: Angsty

A/N: I felt like it was a sad request so I added a little bit of fluff in the beginning, let me know what you think and I’m always open to feedback and requests!

Many, Many Years Ago

She crept along the edge of the hallway, listening for the sound of approaching guards. She had studied their patterns, knowing there shouldn’t be any at this time of day but remained cautious. She ran across the hallway, crouched low, hoping to make her tiny, child’s body, smaller than it already was. The sound of her satin slippers on the marble floor was barely audible, every step taking her closer to the door at the end of the hallway. The door was her biggest challenge. She was never sure how to get in without letting anyone inside know she was there. If she knew more complicated magic, it wouldn’t be a problem. But she didn’t and that was exactly why she trying to get into the room in the first place.

The door was unlocked - no one would disobey the queen’s ordered to leave her undisturbed - which meant all she had to do was open it as gently as possible and hope they were too distracted to realize what was going on.

When the door clicked open, a little boy’s voice floated through the air.

“I don’t understand! Why isn’t it working?”

Judging from the frustration in his voice, it wasn’t the first time he had come up short. She opened the door as slowly as possible, only wide enough to fit her body through.

“Patience Loki, it’s always hardest in the beginning.” The queen’s soothing voice was encouraging but firm.

Mercifully, they were both standing with their backs to the door, staring out the wall of windows overlooking the city. She wasn’t sure what it was the queen was trying to teach him today, but whatever it was, she was ready to learn. But they didn’t need to know that.

As the queen told him to try again, she scurried to get under the large table toward the back of the room before either of them turned around. It had turned out to be a good hiding place the last couple times she had hid there, so she slide under the table cloth to sit cross legged. Even if she didn’t have the best view of the queen, she could see the prince clearly. And what mattered most was that she could hear the instructions well.

After listening to the tips and pointers for a while, and watching Loki fail each time, she began to realize, after a flicker of an image of the prince, that he was trying to create an image of himself. She had tried illusion manipulation on her own but had never done anything better than what Loki had managed to do just now.

She tried her hardest, listening to the queen’s voice as she explained what he had to see in his mind. She was describing her son in a loving voice, from the light spray of freckles on the bridge of his nose to his short dark hair to the emerald green of his tunic.

She squeezed her eyes shut in concentration, seeing him clearly in her mind. She knew she should probably be trying to picture herself but the queen’s voice was luring her to picture the prince instead. She was strong, she could do this.

When she opened her eyes she saw him in double. She was so pleased with her illusion that she let out a little squeal, forgetting that she was not supposed to be there. The sound was enough to cause the queen to turn around. The image flickered under the stress of getting caught but she focused even harder.

The queen praised her son, and she forced your illusion to bow in thanks. Sweat dripped off her forehead, stinging her eye. She couldn’t believe the praises she was receiving, even if the queen didn’t know that the magic was hers.

She knew it was reckless to keep her illusion. Although the queen believed it came from her son, the prince was well aware that none of it was his doing. But her pride refused to let her shatter it.

She didn’t have the strength to hold it much longer and when it disappeared, the queen decided it was time for a break. She couldn’t agree more.

She leaned back on her palms and closed her eyes, a smile on her face. She didn’t care that she was going to get in trouble for having disappeared from her chores all afternoon or that her father was only going to double them tomorrow,. It was all worth it.

“Who are you?”

Her eyes snapped open in fear and she scrambled away, cowering towards the back corner of the table. The prince was bent over, looking at her with his head upside down, his dark hair hanging in a funny way. His bright green eyes were curious, and he was observing her like a puzzle he didn’t quite understand.

She could see him taking in her brown, ratty clothes, and dirty fingers. Under his scrutiny, she wished she could mask her lower status with an illusion that could get her out of here but she didn’t have enough energy to try. And honestly, she was too afraid to.

“Who are you?” he repeated firmly, though not harshly - the way a royal would have been raised to.

She jut her chin up. She was afraid of getting caught, not of him. “(y/n).”

He hummed a little sound of interest. “That was you? That image of me.”

She shrugged, not wanting to admit to any crime.

“Can you do it again?” he asked.

She shook her head but he didn’t seem disappointed by her answer. Rather he looked relieved. She realized that the prince probably didn’t like to be second to a little girl, even if she was the same age as him.

He sat down just outside the edge of the table and crossed his legs under him, the white cloth draping behind his head. She didn’t know what happened to the queen or where she went, but she knew she was going to have to leave. Now.

She scrambled to her hands and knees, about to bolt out of there when he said, “wait.”

She didn’t know if it was because of the tone he used or if it was because of the fact that she had never been this close to the prince before but she stopped and turned to face him.

“Can you tell me how you did it?” His eyes were filled with worry.

She didn’t know if she stayed because she felt pity for the prince or if she liked the fact that a royal was almost begging her to stay. Or maybe it was because the first time she had snuck into his lessons, she had been intrigued by the quiet prince. Either way, she stayed.

She mirrored his position, about a foot away. She wasn’t too sure how to explain to him what she had done. Magic had always come easy to her, and until today, it seemed to come easily to the prince as well. It was hard to explain why it worked for her and not him. So she started her explanation with something concrete, something that she knew for a fact.

“I think it helps if you close your eyes.”

“Mother doesn’t close hers.” He spat, as if forgetting that she was the one who was helping him.

She crossed your arms. “I can leave if you’re going to be grumpy.”

“Fine.” he sighed, “I’ll close my eyes. What now?”

Now that he was no longer staring her down with that striking gaze of his, she could concentrate more easily.

“Then I pictured what I wanted to show.”

“That was mee?”

She felt her cheeks heat, “the queen wanted you to project you so that’s what I did okay?”

He smirked, “so what do I picture? Me wasn’t working.”

“What about me?” she suggested, feeling that, after all of his observing, he must now know what you look like.

He shrugged and took in a long, deep breath. She waited in silence, waiting for her duplicate. She didn’t know how long she sat there for but he was about to give up when she looked to her right and found herself looking at what felt like looking into a slightly distorted mirror.

“Prince,” she whispered, “I think you should open your eyes.”

When he did, his entire face lit up. She felt her own excitement growing.

“I did it.” he murmured in amazement.

“Of course you did.” she laughed, infected by the joy in his smile, “if I can do it, so can you.”

Queen Frigga’s voice interrupted her celebration, her voice freezing her to the spot, sending chills down her spine, “I see you’ve found our guest Loki.”

They both came out from under the table guiltily but she couldn’t look the queen in the eyes.

“There’s no need to be afraid my dear, I’ve known you’ve been here for weeks.” She looked up at the queen in confusion, “I was actually afraid you wouldn’t make it when you were so late today.”

She didn’t know what to say. She was relieved and disappointed all at once. Apparently she wasn’t as good at the whole sneaking in thing as she had thought but at least it didn’t look like she was going to be thrown in jail.

The queen turned her attention to her son. “Did you figure out image manipulation?”

He couldn’t completely hide his proud smile, “I did.”

“I knew you would.”

The queen took her trembling hand and she fought the urge to turn and run to the safety of the table. The queen still hadn’t said what she was going to do about her sneaking around.

“My dear, how would you like to learn, this time out from under the table?” The queen’s eyes were filled with kindness, easing the fear that all this might be a trap.

She looked toward the prince. He had a strange look on his face but she didn’t dare think about it too hard. She said yes. She wouldn’t let anything stand in her way of learning. She was glad she stayed when the prince had asked.

Present Day

Your eyes are red rimmed and watery. You need to pull yourself together. You need to find Loki. You need her to be alive.

You take in a shaky breath and wipe a tear from your cheek. He’s going to need you, now more than ever, so you do your best to pull yourself together. You vowed to be there for him as best as you could, in sickness and in health, till death do you part, so that’s what you’re going to do.

You smooth down your black dress and take one last glance at yourself in the mirror. You don’t look half as much of a mess as you feel inside and you’re thankful for it. It’ll be easier to stay strong knowing you don’t look like you’re going to collapse from grief at any moment. You didn’t have it in you to create an illusion that would make it look like going to this funeral won’t tear you apart inside.

It’s not only the death of Frigga - who quickly became a mother figure soon after she had taken you under her wing - that is causing the pain in your chest. It’s knowing how shattered your husband will be when he finds out. When you tell him.

The only reason you found out first is because you happened to be with Thor the moment news reached him that an assassin entered the castle. Loki was in the library all morning, pouring over books in search of something, he wouldn’t tell you yet what. Thor was about to go and tell his brother but you stopped him, saying you would.

You knew they would want to send her off tonight and not delay the funeral. Even if it seemed rushed to do it the day of, you knew, even if no one wanted to see her go, that everyone wanted to see her at peace, in Hel, as soon as possible.

So you didn’t tell Loki right away. You left him in the library, in his oblivious bliss, while you took a shower, grieving on your own. While you got ready. While you walked down the winding halls to library. Everything to delay to the horrid. Everything to give him a few more moments without grief.

You make your way towards the back of the room where you know you’ll find him. It’s the same little nook you found him every time you’d interrupt him from his studying so he’d come and practice with you - the same nook that, as you got older, became the site of many hidden kisses.

You stop before the corner of a large bookshelf, hidden from view. He’s hunched over a particularly massive, leather-bound book, his dark hair a mess on his head, flowing onto the pages. It becomes hard to breath and you wish, for the millionth time, that Frigga was still alive. That you don’t have to put her son, your husband, through the pain of losing his mother.

“It isn’t like you to lurk in the shadows my darling.”

“Who’s to say I’m not plotting something mischievous, prince?”

He smirks when you come around the corner, “because you leave all the mischievous plotting to me.”

You smile, but it doesn’t take him long to realize something is off. He’s known you for far too long to know when you’re faking it.

“What’s wrong?” He lifts his attention from the book.

You purse your lips, unsure what to say. Your eyes water. You know you have to tell him but you’re afraid.

“(y/n).” he stands, “What’s wrong?”

You have to tell him.

You’re strong enough to tell him.

“Loki…you’re mother…Frigga, she’s dead.”

He stares at you blankly, blinking slowly. You don’t know whether he’s processing or if he doesn’t believe you. He has no reason not to but then again, Frigga was perfectly healthy when he saw her yesterday.

Loki doesn’t say anything so neither do you. You’re about to approach him when he lets out a violent burst of magic, books flying everywhere around him. None of them touch you. Despite his rage, none of them even came close, and even if they had, your magic was near, ready for anything.

You stay at a distance. Not because you’re afraid of him, that’s never been the case, but because you know he’ll feel stifled right now, even if you’re the one approaching him.

“How?” he growls, lifting his gaze to yours.

You’re glad Thor took care of the assassin. The murderous rage behind his green eyes tells you he would have done something he would have regretted later. Something that wouldn’t have brought him peace anyways.

“How?” he repeats, another book flying across the library.

You sigh, trying not to let your eyes do more than water. “There was an assassin. I…Loki, it’s been taken care of, right now, you need to grieve for your mother. We’re going to send her off in an hour.”

The words do nothing to sooth your husband. Rather they only make him angrier.

“How long,” he whispers, “how long has she been dead for? How long has she been alone? How long have you kept this from me?”

His voice becomes louder with each word. You don’t answer, not when you know that, deep down, he knows the answer. You keep hold of his intense gaze, your eyes unyielding. He isn’t mad at you, not really. But you would take his anger if you could be sure he didn’t, in some way, blame himself.

His fists clench in an attempt to stay calm, to hold onto an illusion of composure. He’s breathing heavily, his nostrils flaring. He wants to say more. You can tell he’s trying to find the words that will make you fight back. The words that will send you into a screaming match.

You see the moment he realizes that, no matter what he says, you’re not going to rise to the bait and fight him. His shoulders sag and you step forward to catch his heavy body, wrapping your arms around him tightly. He grips onto you, burying his face in your neck.

“Why?” He asks, his body trembling, “why?”

“I don’t know, Loki…I really don’t know.”

You stay there holding onto each other long after your knees begin to hurt from standing and the tears have dried from your cheeks. As long as he’s holding onto you, you won’t let go.

“I can’t…” his voice is muffled but you know what he’s saying.

What he’s asking.

The same thing he’s never been afraid to ask from you, despite how much it kills him to ask it from anyone else.

The same thing he asked you when you first met.

Help.

“It’s okay,” you hold on a little tighter, “we’ll get through this, we always do.”

You know a part of him only wants to send an image of himself because a part of you wants to do the same, but you know you’ll both regret it if you do. This is something, no matter how hard, that you have to do in person.

He pulls away, far enough that he can look into your eyes. His are red rimmed, most likely a mirror of yours, but the corner of his mouth lifts slightly. There’s no humour in the smile, only grief. It’s a silent thank you and your press your lips to his lightly in response.

You take in a deep breath and muster all the energy you have left.

I’m strong, you tell yourself, I can do this.

You feel your magic wrap around the two of you as you leave the library, and head down the halls. No one you cross knows you’re there.

You cannot shield him from Frigga’s death, but you can shield him from the pitying looks and the burden of being in the public eye. Through presence concealment, you give yourselves privacy.

He squeezes your hand before wrapping his arm around your waist, holding you up as much as you are for him, because you can get through anything when you’re in it together. You always have, and always will.

Tags: *wasn’t sure who wanted to be tagged in one shots, let me know if you’d like*

@lokislilcaribbeanprincess @lokixme @jessiejunebug @wrappedinlokisarms @bbcsassdeadass @crescent-night @thathedonistgirl @lemonie2 @thatkidofwarandpeace

#Loki Laufeyson #loki fanfic #loki fanfiction #loki x reader #loki imagine #fan fiction #marvel fanfiction #fanfic #MCU fic #MCU fanfiction

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