#it messy cause I want to be done with it!!!

[asimpforyagami]

can you write about pm!dazai who edges you a lot with a breeding kink? fem reader please!

ᴅᴀᴢᴀɪ ᴏꜱᴀᴍᴜ !

★ COUNT ─ 0.7k

!! TAGS ─ f!reader x pm!dazai, underage sex, unprotected sex, p in v, oral (f receiving), cunnilingus, fingering, squirting, spanking, degradation, praise kink, hair pulling, edging, begging kink, breeding kink, overstimulation, slightly angsty at the end, mood swings, exhibitionism, public sex, bathroom sex, mirror sex, dazai is a jerk and reader is a brat

★ PROLOGUE ─ a jealous, mafia boyfriend? what could possibly go wrong?

SMUT, 18+, MDNI

It wasn't easy being Osamu Dazai's girlfriend.

Sure, the suicidal tendency was bearable to some extent. The intense amount of flirting and teasing? Maybe. Heck, even his dangerous profession was okay with you.

But there were times - times that pissed even your usually calm (and secretly loving) boyfriend off, which would result in moments such as this one.

"Please, please, 'Samu, I wanna come."

"No," he flat-out refused you, placing his tongue so that it would hit your clit with every word. "Should've thought of that before draping yourself all over that dumbass."

"But I-"

You were cut off by another finger inside your cunt, stretching it out even more. You were practically screaming at this point, make-up smudged and head lolled to one side of the bathroom door. Your legs were shaking, and you thought you would've collapsed ages ago if it wasn't for Dazai's hands holding your ass steadily from in between your legs.

"Oh, god, please, I can't hold it in!" you cried pathetically, mascara running down your cheeks.

"Better try to," he replied haughtily. "You wanted my attention, right? There you have it."

It was only when you began to drip that he let out a groan as if it was your fault for not letting him "enjoy his meal."

"Seriously?" he gave your ass a loud spank. "Can't even listen to me? You're miserable."

You whimpered, face pressing into the door frame as your legs finally let go, causing you to fall crashing on the floor while Dazai got up and unbuckled his pants.

He folded his belt in half, bent down and hit your ass again, and although he had tried to be as gentle as he could've, you still ended up squirting the rest of your orgasm.

"Done?" Dazai rolled his eyes, and you nodded. He pulled you up from your elbows harshly, as if you were nothing more than a ragdoll for him, and pushed you against the bathroom sink.

Running a slender finger down your back, he spoke quietly, as if his entire mood had changed all of a sudden.

"You like this, don't you? Like it when I play with you like this? That's the reason you talk to Chuuya, right? So I get jealous? Because you know we'll end up this way then?"

Your brain was fucked out and your vision was blurry, but you could make out the serious, almost somber expression on your boyfriend's face from the mirror in front of you. You bucked your hips behind you to reach his cock, closing your eyes and nodding. You mumbled a tiny, "I'm sorry," which he ignored.

"You won't... leave me, right?"

You opened your eyes and gave him a lazy smile, which he appreciated, considering your current condition.

"You love me?"

"The most."

Dazai nodded and lined his cock up your entrance. Your hands gripped the edge of the sink tightly in anticipation, your knuckles white. Slowly, he pushed in, taking in every inch of your tight pussy. His hand reached out to fondle your nipples, head resting on your back as he pulled back and thrust inside you again.

You let out a loud moan, mouth forming an O-shape and eyelashes framing your eyes in a sultry look. Oh, how you loved the way Dazai pounded into you, hair messy and sweat dropping, calling you his "pretty little slut". So lovable after the relentless edging and begging.

Well, it didn't take him long to switch up his personality once more, going from calm to rough all over again. You were slumped over the sink, head and back arched while Dazai silently thrust into you with all his might.

"Bet you wouldn't leave me just so you could have this dick, yea?" he yanked your hair and you yelped. "So I'm gonna come inside you, and I'm hiding your little birth control pills."

You whined.

"You're my little breeding bitch. I'm gonna fuck you so hard. Bet you'd like for your periods to disappear for nine months? Eh?" he teased.

The idea was refreshing. And so he continued. Once, twice, thrice. Honestly, you couldn't remember how much cum he stored in you. It wasn't until someone knocked on the door that you left the mall. This was probably the eighth time you got caught in public.

It really wasn't easy being Osamu Dazai's girlfriend.

#bsd #bsd dazai #bungo stray dogs #dazai osamu #dazai x reader #bungou stray dogs dazai #osamudazai #dazai bsd #dazai smut #dazai scenarios #bsd smut #bungou stray dogs #bungo stray dogs x reader #bungo stray dogs dazai #bsd x y/n #bsd x reader #bsd x you #bungou sd #bungo stray dogs smut #dazai osamu x reader #osamu x reader #osamu dazai #osamu dazai smut

[sophie-frm-mars]

Hi, ex-supporter here. Genuinely hope you’re doing well. I have been tempted to start up my support again because you genuinely are a talented writer/creator and I do enjoy your work.

I hope you understand supporting your Patreon is somewhat fraught. Your private life should be none of our business, but sadly it is relevant here. Moral action, both private and political is central to your work; you have called out plenty of people for abuse & morality drives your politics. We know abuse took place on your end, but that’s all.

A lot of people like myself might be emotionally rooting for you to bounce back from this, but are unable to support you right now because that moral dissonance has not been resolved. We really don’t know if you are like other ‘cancelled’ leftist influencers and just use leftist values to deflect attention away from abuse, or you are actually trying to do better and working on yourself.

You don’t owe us anything. However, many of us who are eager to support you are forced to hold back because trust has been damaged, and there has not been any real sign of reparation or reconciliation. Maybe you think those kind of questions are invasive, maybe you don’t think we are real fans for not sticking by you despite the allegations.

I don’t know, I just want you to know that there are plenty of people who do want to support you, but feel they need to trust you first. And that can’t happen without addressing some things.

Anyways, best wishes. Take care.

Hiya, thank you for speaking to me on this.

Before I say the rest of what I say I want to be clear that between me and the people I was involved with in 2023, there were some instances where I was responsible for harm, there were instances where I received harm and there was also a general pervasive ecosystem of harmful behaviours in the community I was in. This includes people who signed the statement against me, and in one instance one of them did something which everyone to whom I have described it has agreed is sexual assault, though there is more besides.

For the time being I'm not talking publicly more about what happened because it was a very messy situation, and although I have been seriously harmed by issues in my personal life being litigated in public in this way, I don't want to give my full account of my relationships with everyone involved because I don't want that type of harm to be done to other trans women. There are plenty of complicating factors as there often are in real life that social media isn't really capable of parsing. I have made it clear repeatedly that I am open to hearing anything that people involved want to say to me, and I talked in this post in January about that and about what I would be doing to ensure that I put in the work and make sure I don't cause harm like it again

https://x.com/sophie_frm_mars/status/1745414530455261531

I think that that post says everything I would like to say for now, although I regret saying I agree that my behaviour was abusive, because with more distance and perspective I don't think abusive behaviour was actually described to me.

As I understand it via the support that my therapist and friends have offered, my problems in 2023 were that: I wasn't taking my mental health seriously, I didn't learn good kink practice, I had very little appreciation of my own boundaries and when I shouldn't be doing something that someone asks me to do, and I was high basically all the time. I am in therapy and doing DBT and taking my mental health deadly seriously, I have done a huge amount of reading assigned by my therapist about kink, sex, relationships and mental health, I am working in an ongoing way on learning how to effectively communicate, know my boundaries and understand myself well enough to not be in the kinds of situations that risk harm, and I'm no longer high all the time.

(If anyone is interested in those book recs, so far I've read: Tomorrow Sex Will Be Good Again by Katherine Angel; The Right To Sex by Amia Srinivasan; Screw Consent (I hate this edgy title) by Joseph Fischel; Playing Well With Others; The Loving Dominant by John and Libby Warren; I Hope We Choose Love by Kai Cheng Thom; The New Topping Book by Dossie Easton and Janet W Hardy; and Dissociation Made Simple by Jamie Marich. There have been some others, and I've written a bit about them in the book club channel on my discord as I've been reading)

I haven't heard from the people involved. The last I heard from anyone was one of my exes calling me a pathological liar and saying that they just want to move on with their lives, so while I'm doing the work to make sure I act better in future I am just trying to get on with my life and let them get on with theirs. I hope this clarifies why I have not talked further about the situation.

I will say that the last few months have been hellish for me. I have been frequently suicidal, I spent Christmas and new years alone, I lost a tooth because I couldn't afford proper dental treatment, people from within the community I've been ostracised from have been putting pressure on my remaining friends to cut ties with me, Keffals had my abuser on her twitch stream, a bizarre exaggerated and monsterised version of my personal life has been publicly gossiped about by trans people, fash and "leftist" drama streamers alike, I have been doing other work to make sure I can still pay rent and afford my bills and my HRT, and to survive. As I've been getting more stable and more able to focus on things besides this, I've been working on new writing because all I want with regard to my work and my channel is for my writing to help people. I don't want to talk about my private life, but I do understand that some number of people will feel after what has been said about me that they can't move forward with me without hearing the full details. Lots of people in my life have repeatedly encouraged me to publish a full account of everything that happened but I know how the Internet works and I don't want other trans women to be harmed in the ways that I have been harmed.

[messydoodles]

Ending 2/2

Ending 1

Part 1 and Part 2

Raiden: Please. Tell me the truth Lao

~

Kung Lao: Raiden..it’s complicated. For my sake and your’s it’s best if we don’t-

Raiden: I love you Kung Lao

Kung Lao: What..?

Raiden: I love you so much Lao

Raiden: I miss when we hung out. I miss your determination. I miss your laugh and smile. Hell, I even miss you running my wallet dry at Madam Bo’s

~

Raiden: I love you too much to let you push me away like this

Raiden: So please, let me back in

Kung Lao: Oh my god…

Kung Lao: I’m so sorry. I love you so much Rai…

Raiden: Shh, it’s okay Lao. I love you too

~~~

RAHHHHHHH. I’m finally finished and I’m satisfied :)

I also want to comment that ik my art isn’t that good beyond stills, but that’s what Messy Doodles is all about to me. Being okay with the slight imperfections because truly no matter the mistakes I saw while making this I’m happy cause I’ve never really done a big ass comic in awhile/ever. I still wanna try new big comics, but not in a while. Thank you for liking my work and I hope you have a nice day 😎👍

#mortal kombat #cute #mini comic #mk1 #mk1 fanart #drawing #mk1 raiden #mk1 kung lao #railao #raiden x kung lao #angst with a happy ending #hurt/comfort #angst #hanahaki disease

[sea-jello]

ALOS 200 DTIYS!!

@morrogatari HOLY FUCKING SHIT IM FINALLY DONE HERE IT IS CONGRATULATIONS ON 200 OKAY TIME TO YAP

its not as interesting or dynamic as the one i showed you earlier but okay let me explain this. so i have her holding her hands up to her eyes in the see no evil gesture right BUT you see how shes still looking through her fingers BECAUSE you also said she still sees everything. boom best of both worlds or whatever. i wanted to add the blindfold so i sorta have it covering her mouth alluding to the speak no evil gesture?? idk i just wanted the funky eye blindfold. i tried to make it look directly at you AND shes also looking directly at you cause she sees everything,, you see what i did there,, uuhuuhhh you see. i dont really have an explanation for the glowing eyes in the bg i just thought they would be cool and i did end up covering her dogs i aint learning how to draw bare dogs. i also tried to make it a sort of higher angle her robe and the hair behind her is spread out on the floor i hope that came through. one thing im unexplainably proud of is the chains LOOK AT THEM

AND THE FABRIC SHADING I THINK I CAME IN CLUTCH its a little messy cause i could not find a reference for the LIFE OF ME anyways more versions below of course

no shading and without the black hands and legs cause lowkey i forgot they were darker until the end

also look at what i was fucking doing with the rendering. i don’t know where i learned this from but i set it to overlay (the orangey one) and i just put more green over top

AND in true jello fashion

here’s my camera roll 💀

#IM SO SERIOUS WHEN I SAY I WAS JUMPING UP AND DOWN CAUSE I WAS DONE #GRAAHAHAHHHH ITS NOT EXACTLY THE VISION PERFECTLY BUT ITS STILL NOT BAD HEY #ive been working on this for. how long #a month maybe right when you posted it when was that #to be fair i hammered out a good portion of it in like two days and then didnt touch it for weeks #like last time lmao #i dont know anything about the fic so unfortunately i cant hide more references in there #i got nothing to say in the tags this time ive already yapped everything out #CONGRATS AGAIN ALO!! BIG TWO ZERO ZERO #i have another math quiz tomorrow lmao #ninjago #lego ninjago #the preeminent #ninjago the preeminent #ninjago dtiys #alo200dtiys #eyes cw #idk just in case #jellos scribbles

[leslutdepointedulac]

Reasons why Louis de Pointe du Lac is a messy af deranged as anything dude (despite hiding behind his sad boi exterior so we don't remember his messiness):

He beat up a priest cause he was chatting shit about his dead brother

He was turned on by killing a guy during his vampire initiation

He said that he would rather kill a child than part with his money

He set his house on fire

He ate a child (Claudia) after basically starving himself for 4 years living off only animals

He stood and watched Claudia kill Lestat before dumping him in a swamp

He set Lestat on fire

He ditched Claudia for Armand despite only knowing him for 2 seconds

He set the Theatre on fire

He drained Daniel, not caring whether or not he actually died, and then just left him half dead

He denied Lestat help cause 'he got himself into this mess, he can get himself out'

He said he likes it when his victims struggle when he kills them

He didn't give a single fuck when Marius killed Arjun and said they were 'disturbing his reading'

Feel free to add more if I've missed any. I probably have.

#i love him so much #my messy deranged boy #if anything the fact that he hides his fucked up-ness behind his sad boi exterior makes him more fucked imo #cause it's like he doesn't want anyone to remember that bit of him #and is instead like 'no i'm not fucked in the head. i'm normal. i'm just a sad boi' #and i support that #he has done wrong i won't deny that #but as he should #he should be a messy bitch #i stand by everything he's ever done and will do #louis de pointe du lac #vampire chronicles #tvc #my vampire chronicles

[derpiedoxie]

So my friend dared me to draw something with the colour turned off, so naturally I drew sun

Thought the values were pretty accurate, thought I might actually get close to the colours!

Then my other friend had a look before I did and said that it “looks like a shiny sun”

I had a look at the result and

Behold

✨Shiny sun✨

#the reason it’s so messy is cause it was done on my school iPad during class so I wanted to be fast #the shading had more effort put into it cause I did that at home lol #anyway enjoy poisoned sun #still not sure what kind of status effect that is #fnaf #fnaf security breach #fnaf sb #fnaf sun #derpiedoxie #five nights at freddy's #five nights at freddy's security breach #sundrop #fnaf daycare attendant #digital art #fanart #daycare attendant #security breach #fnaf fanart

[killmymind]

i don’t think i’ve ever felt this lost in my life. tbh

#feeling sad? sure. hopeless? been there done that. anxious as hell? at least once a week. but lost? no. not really #and that’s really fucking scary because i’m not familiar with it and i just don’t know how to deal with it #i can’t stop thinking that i’m running out of time because i’m 25 and i don’t think i can afford feeling this way #taking a break from uni sounds good in theory but in reality? again. i’m 25. i need to at least achieve one thing in my life holy shit #it’s SO hard to see the good even when it’s right in front of me or someone points it out. like having a job or studying or getting to #travel or even just having friends ARE achievements but i always want More More and More i am addicted to wanting more cause it feels like #nothing i do is ever enough. and now i’m adding feeling lost because i’m finally acknowledging the fact that i don’t know what i want to do #with what i’m studying or how to get a different job in the future when i almost have no experience and everything is just so frustrating #because i simply don’t fucking know. i just don’t. i can’t afford not knowing!! everything is so messy rn you would think i’d be thriving #after seeing louis and meeting aria and traveling to germany and i am genuinely so happy those things happened but fuck man there is always #the Bigger Thing taking over and it makes me feel like an ungrateful brat i just don’t fucking know man. maybe i am an ungrateful brat #but it’s just so hard to be happy when you’re feeling so lost with everything in your life and yourself #anyway i just. needed to let that out #negative #effie talks to the moon

[cometrose]

i always think about zhongli crying cause he’s been through so much but he pushes down a lot of his emotions so i have a question

#bonus if he does cry!!! is it a messy sobbing sickly cry #or a hot tears streaming down silent cry #genshin impact #zhongli #i think he can cry but he hasn’t done it in thousands of years so he kind of forgot #it’s easier to make his expression stony and firm then to let it all out #he physically can’t cry is also a nice one #cause you know he’s a being of stone or maybe because this vessel is artificial he isn’t able to cry normally #proof that he’s not human not matter how hard he tries #he can cry but no tears so it’s just choked sobbing #brutal it fits after wearing a stone mask even if he wants to cry nothing comes out #maybe it’s the piece of him that wants to remain strong that even subconsciously he can’t show weakness #tears of gold is a personal favorite #it’s inhuman and sad #like all his bodily fluids are some derivative of gold #in fontaine you can talk to some melusines and they say that gold is the tears of the sun #seeing as zhongli symbolizes the sun i have reason to believe he cries real gold

[floorpancakes]

#twitter repost #i guess its probably not THAT controversial i think i just really wanted to get that off my chest #xxxholic #i guess #no but like even tho mostly the quality was incredible the fact they basically were like HAHA ASSPULL and then dipped soon after is so.. #i think im even a couple chapters behind and im not even rushing to catch up on them cause it burned me so bad #also cause its clamp im like. they can and will get worse sometimes with their weird shit and i cant trust that they wont #in fact holic is a funny one cause altho im less familiar with other series i know full well holic is one of their least Messy™ ones #iykwim #obviously thats not an inherent metric but like holic is usually nonsense free but i will never stop giving clamp bombastic side eye after #parts of the og ending and MOSTLY the fakeout alt universe mystery arc turning into an irrelevant fetch quest like #how do u produce media so perfect and then do that #and its also so long past tsubaholis main writing period so its like who cares??? why now??? #especially cause it was like boom hiatus #anyway thats the main reason u never catch me rereading rei much at all #like i dont have an encyclopaedic knowledge of it solely cause the twist outcome pissed me off and made me so fckin nervous for the future #also im just worried now the movies done theyll be like oh we wrote 2 chapters ajd back to hiatus good riddance!! like #I've seen the digital fear struck into the eyes of x fans i wouldnt put it past them #anyway im still excited but god damn am i nervous and fucking suspicious as hell #sigh #why cant we live in a no fakeout more interesting arc ender world where also they decided to not pull a teacher student age gap 'ship' #ship in quotes cause they obviously dont fcking love each other #but clamp is SOOOOO addicted to that trope they wanted to mess with it a little like a cat with yarn even if its non romantic #like they were like we r a thirsty flower if we dont do something problematic even as a plot contrivance with no romance we will dieeeeeeee #one day i when holic is public domain (yeah im gonna live until like 500 im so cool like that) i will release hit doumeki movie #not trying to be a hater btw they do great work but damn if those ladies dont make me nervous as hell for where this whole thing could go #or if they even wanna finish it

[kirayamidemon]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY RIDDLE~~!

#twisted wonderland #twst #riddle rosehearts #drawings #BLESSED ME WITH BOTH OF HIS BDAY CARDS N ALL I CAN GIVE HIM IS THIS SHITTY MESSY ASS UNWORTHY TRIBUTE IN RETURN FKLSDJD #i wanted to finish it yesterday for his bday but i couldnt jkfdsk orz #this is so rough n messy n doesnt do him justice at all sobs i did this really fast cause i wanted to be done in time for his bday kjfsk #which didnt happen anyways jfjsdlk #this was even less effort than the tweels ljskfjkds iM SO SORRY RIDDLE I REALLY DO LOVE YOU THO I SWEARRR #BUT HAPPY BIRTHDAY RIDDLEEEEE MY LOVE MY HEART MY QUEENNNNN

[coffeeshib]

okay look

fuck. you have so many achingly beautiful works and convey such a wonderful scope of emotions in your stories.

i am enraptured, constantly, by the way you're able to write the characters. nothing (nobody) feels out of place. in fact, it all feels remarkably *right*.

like so many of your words feel like the pieces of the puzzle falling, ever so gently, into place whether it's an au or a seamless offering of what the show never gave us (but should have).

so, sincerely – thank you for writing the breath back into my lungs when life feels like it is drowning me.

(it's stupid late and this is probably a mess, but i'm trying to be better about expressing my gratitude for those that offer comfort through their art)

AAAAAAAAA wow guys thank!!!!! it’s just a silly little fic about being horny but also handling/caring for one another at their lows but it’s close to my heart so it makes me h*ppy to hear all this

#never thought i'd write a long fic again but here we are already on almost 100k words #heart warm & i'm just really thankful - it's mostly thanks to you guys who encourage & keep me going 😩 #also makes me believe more in myself & in my skills to write not just like fluff but also some deeper complicated messy feelings that #a character experiences & being able to get that across to the readers & make them think 'oh i relate/understand why she's feeling that way #& seeing kara for example; who's always at her best (or at least she tries to be cause that's what's expected of her) #& then the rare times she's at her lows #in canon we saw kara going out all her way in many diff fonts to show that she'll always be there for lena even when lena's at her lowest #& i just wanted to write something showing the same done for kara #& trying to do like a 'if you can handle me at my worst i can worship you at my best' thing #@anon who asked about if it's coming to an end; the fic is close to the end yeah there's just a bit more to go!! #also @physical book anon......... Bro (with a lot of feeling) #anyway thank you guys again so much i'm busting a massive heart nut!!!!!! #hope you're all having a lovely day #asks

[nagitoedit]

there are things abt me that i dont talk about not because im being secretive i either just forget to mention it or think no one wants to hear about it but i think it gives like important context to whats wrong with me 💖

#me when im a child of a messy divorce because my dad has crazy issues that he never got help for so he started self medicating #and dealt with addiction and got to the point of stealing money or trying to return items he never bought to walmart for a refund #and got arrested many times and eventually spent 5 years in prison which literally didnt help at all just gave him more trauma and #caused relationship issues between him and his family which left him without healthy connections and support and #then he got accused of a crime even my mom doesnt believe he did and she'd experienced horrible things from him while they were together #and so he disappeared to run from the police and hes been legally considered a missing person for many years now and it is unknown to #us or any of his family members if hes even still alive out there somewhere and ive had dreams that he comes back and #i wonder if theres something that could be done something that could help him maybe we could never truly be on good terms again but #maybe at least he could have a chance at a decent life even if its away from us #i used to sit on the couch with him and watch nascar and monster trucks when i was little #and i still have some of his nascar novelty items in my desk drawer and the pocket tool that used to be his. #the scars of his tantrums are still in our house the holes he punches in walls covered up with copy paper taped over the wall #and im sure i have the same anger issues or whatever disorders he never got properly diagnosed for because i seem to have inherited everyth #ng from him his eyes his face his hair his anger issues even his handwriting somehow #and he is why im scared of ever doing any drugs because i just know im probably genetically predisposed to addiction just like him #and i dont want that to happen to me #recently i cut my hair and i looked in the mirror and i looked just like him #when i visit my paternal grandparents and aunts and uncles i see the family photos with him hanging on the walls #and i see that large painting that used to be in our house #👍

[permanentreverie]

a moment of joy in days of tired darkness!!!

#i complain way too much here so sharing my triumphs <3 #(taking a page from songbird because i want to be more like her) #getting home from work today i was able to get ALL of my chores done!!! #i loooved having my friend stay with me for a week i truly needed the break and she’s such a blessing <3 #(we bought ‘soul sisters’ matching bracelets - hers gold and mine silver - and the statement couldn’t be more true 🥹) #but in that i let my room get VERY messy #and i was busing working yesterday and didn’t have time (literally cried on my way home because of how tired i was) #so i made it a goal to do everything tonight so tomorrow (my one day off) i may relax! #so i was able to clean my room; do two loads of laundry; wash my bedding; vacuum; water my plants; and tidy my bathroom!! #it may not sound like much but it was a MESS #also i did my nails cause they broke :( #so now they are VERY short (had to cut them) and i painted a few coats of clear nail polish so hopefully they won’t break #i have to get gas and get my oil changed and exchange some icecream tomorrow morning #but then i’m just gonna relax!!! #would like to change my themes but we shall see. i want to watch tv and read mostly #also i’m gonna stop in and book a hair appointment for next week!! #that’s right i’m gonna chop off my hair #it’s been years and i didn’t get it trimmed as it was growing out so i have lots of split and dead ends #and if i have to get it cut i may as well just go all the way yknow #i love having short hair and i’m lowkey excited #and i work 6 days after that but thankfully i booked myself for opening shifts which leaves my evenings free to myself which i really love

[notjanine]

okay so our internship cohort is pretty tight and mostly women, so we be girl talkin. and the girls have gotten invested in my love life, partly bc this situation is so ridiculous and partly bc they're not autistic so they're like Omg you just talked with them directly about your wants and needs?! multiple of these bitches have expressed their desire to live vicariously through me in the context of all this etc etc. so anyway. a bunch of us are chatting about this after class and it's fun and loud, so Messy Guy comes up like Ooh what are we talking about?! and classmate is like Al out here dating two people, living the dream!! and i had to leave for a meeting before i could catch his reaction but they were still giggling about it when i left so l m a o

#part of me feels bad for him bc now i know him so well i know he will continue to cause his own problems #and he lacks the self-awareness to understand why. but part of me is also like. does he know how bad he fucked up does he have regrets lmao #but also my closest internship friend--who set me up w one of these current dudes (gn)--invited me to her birthday party #she was like It'll be cool it'll be chill not too big and you'll know people- Bookstore and Messy Guy will be there! #Y'ALL WHAT DO I DO #she doesn't know i hooked up with messy guy #i told bookstore enough about messy guy that they might be able to guess if they met him #and also tbqh messy guy is messy but i still kinda have the hots for him like #if he were to hit me up on the right day i might still say yes. like i don't actively want to add him to the rotation but. he is SO hot #also also my friend KNEW bookstore was packing heat when she set me up w them!! and we have been girl talking!! #so i already told her they're like twice the size of the last one! so if #if she figures out that messy guy is the last one then she has to know that about him!! #also she knows that the last one was shitty and did some shitty things that he shouldn't have done #and that would definitely affect their friendship #OOF. i wanna go bc i love her so much but what if. mess happens! #i have two and a half weeks to decide #but who knows if i'll even be messing with bookstore still everything is weird rn #gossshhhhhh #and i still. still have to coordinate w these two dudes about hanging out this week/end #and on top of all of that i'm about to start at a new three week internship rotation #which i just found out is going to be much more intense than i expected #and i have a huge semester-long project due tonight lmao #everything happens so much indeed #can't wait to get railed and turn my brain the fuck OFF for a while. but i gotta figure out by whom when!!! #lizzo_boys.mp3

[bloodstonechunk]

𝙏𝙔𝙋𝙀𝙎 𝙊𝙁 𝙋𝙀𝙊𝙋𝙇𝙀    :     𝙁𝙇𝙊𝙒𝙀𝙍𝙎

Tagged by @derjaegermond for Dravyn; tagging @beloved-menagerie for Juan and Miodrag

𝙍𝙊𝙎𝙀𝙎  -   true romantic, loving the classics, pricked fingers, perfect makeup done to impress, bruises easily, beloved but unknown, soul as old as time, overused and under-appreciated.

𝘿𝘼𝙄𝙎𝙄𝙀𝙎  -    clean linens, youthful naivety, family, wide open spaces, running barefoot, moving towards instead of away, trying to forget about death, sun blindness.

𝙎𝙐𝙉𝙁𝙇𝙊𝙒𝙀𝙍𝙎  -   standing tall, strong roots, a home to always return to, warm summer air, holding onto lost hope, belief in growth, painted overalls, split ends.

𝘽𝙇𝙐𝙀𝘽𝙀𝙇𝙇𝙎   -   the end of spring, determination for the truth, cold and cautious, moonlight on windowsills, the taste of ice, unnecessary shyness, quiet belief in the extraordinary, complicated morals.

𝘿𝘼𝙁𝙁𝙊𝘿𝙄𝙇𝙎  -   mom friend, sweets, the smell of baking, riverbanks, leaving behind a toxic situation, being happy with your reflection, believing in luck, moving in a pack.

𝙄𝙍𝙄𝙎𝙀𝙎  -   sour candies, unappreciated elegance, valour, crystals projecting rainbows on white walls, unintended organization, old royalty, refusal to bow, learning a new language for the fun of it.

𝙇𝙄𝙇𝙄𝙀𝙎 -   secret poison, perfect handwriting, crisp consonants, pressed and ironed sheets, open windows, infinite persistence, thick skin, colder hands.

𝙇𝙄𝙇𝘼𝘾  -  fleeting and fair, strong but delicate, radiating good vibes, the beauty of falling apart, the joy in being scattered, soft fabrics, whirlwind romance, keeping the door open.

#dash games #character aesthetic: Dravyn #none of these quite nail him down; he's a bit of a messy person lol #with some very clearly defined ideas about himself #others that aren't quite lined up with reality #and some that are purely his ego talking #anyways. bluebells irises and lilies huh #'bruises easily' well when you're that pale it doesn't matter how EASY it is to bruise once it happens it will be extremely visible #no matter how minor #complicated morals though. hm. I mean the jokey answer is he doesn't have any but that's not really accurate #he HAS them he simply... has only the ones that let him do what he wants while still feeling smug about #'oh at least I'm better than THOSE guys' #he's also fully aware that his immoral actions are immoral. he doesn't care though as long as they get him what he wants #I'm really just talking in circles now so some ACTUAL characterization trivia incoming before I call the tags done #there are a couple core traits I try to give each OC that are Theirs and I can use to get into their headspace #Dravyn's are Proud; Curious/Restless; Selfish; Violent #or Impulsive actually would be a better descriptor than violent #he didn't have much of a filter between thought and action anyway #then in most verses he intentionally strips out what little there is wrt causing harm to others

[lawain-dimensional-heroes]

Downside on working on a project and being distracted and not doing it for months? You forget what the fuck you’ve done and what it is...

I don’t even know what some of my coding does or where my stuff is at... Either I might redo the whole project: ONE AT A TIME...Or just try and make sense of it and fix it.

#out of aura #the mun who takes care of everyone here | mun #I might go with the former considering how little coding I've done on the player movement #Cause as much as I want to go my own way at the same time I've noticed how messy it has gotten #the option menu for sure.