#it also got the guy who played two face in tdk

[bearpillowmonster]

Batman '89 (The comic)

This is allegedly an inspired sort of Tim Burton Batman 3 with Harvey Dent. There's also a Superman '78 one that I'm going to cover later on but so far this one is 6 issues.

It's pretty sound, it feels like an 80's movie with the way the comic panels look and the wonky way the suit moves, it makes it feel pretty authentic. Harvey is set up quite efficiently, immediately making him the bad guy but with good intentions. He thinks that Batman is the cause for all this crime, he's challenged people to be like him or get rid of him so Harvey takes it out on him as well as Gordon.

And for a time, Bruce starts to agree with him. It challenges whether Batman is causing more trouble than help.

Did I mention that Babs is in this draft? She's nothing to really write home about, more or less just plays Rachel's role in TDK. But you also might know that Robin was going to be introduced in this, Drake. Not Tim Drake though. This brings about a whole slew of things because he's not Dick with the tragic backstory or acrobatic experience, he's an African American kid who lives in a garage car shop. (R)oyal Auto Body. He doesn't care about Batman, in fact he even has reason to dislike him but takes up the role of Robin on his own. You see, Batman misses out on some things, particularly when it's domestic or smaller scale. Robin's out here looking after the poor people in need.

There's this scene that's really representative of it where this guy steals from this shop down the street but he only steals essentials like diapers and formula, a common problem we have today, but Batman comes knocking wondering where the cash is because he heard the shopowner yapping about someone robbing him. Robin swoops in, fights Batman and leaves a tip, Drake, the kid with no money to his name gives this guy he doesn't know eight dollars when Bruce, a billionaire, wouldn't do the same and instead tried to chastise her for it. Robin is in the grey so to speak. And where does the name Robin come from? Well one of the white dudes tries to pin a robbery on him saying "He was robin-" and people took that as Robin Hood. (also they eventually mention he feeds birds) Very smart and very clever.

So how does Harvey get his second face? Someone sets fire to the body shop and Drake's left inside, got blazed with battery acid and fuel (auto shop), and it ended up being Bruce as Bruce and Drake as Drake who yanked him out. As normal civilians, they get along (mostly) but as vigilantes, they're adversaries. But while he's getting burned, he's having delusions of grandeur which becomes the other side of the coin and always weighing possibilities, at least better than Batman Forever's version of some guy splashing a cup of acid in Dent's face (which he just had on his person for whatever reason) and then Batman showing up too late and jumping over the gate (for whatever reason).

And guess who the arsons are?...Just some guys. But guess who catches them? Catwoman returns! And Bruce has one of her cats. I get worried when I hear there's more connection to the other movies, (including Joker's goons) because I was afraid it'd all get sidelined or just not well treated or bring down the quality of the rest but no, it's all quite good and fits.

One of the best Two-Faces I've seen. I've seen reviews saying they're not really a fan of the way it was done but I really enjoyed it, it's definitely better than Bats Forever and may even surpass Returns.

#batman #comic #review #89 #batman '89 #batman 3

[cherryvaleska]

watching some cheap horror movie on netflix with my mom and it's got little baby david mazouz in it and i'm BARKING that's my little boy 🤧💞

#he's SOOO baby 😭💖 adorable #it also got the guy who played two face in tdk #mr peanutbutter voice: is this a CROSSOVER episode?? #damian.txt

[himbovillain-anon]

I saw these two asks and my lazy ass found a way to combine the two together 😈

Also this is an everybody lives au lmao

Putting up w/ the squad's bullshit

You were never a fighter on the front lines when it comes to working with the suicide squad, but you still played a vital part as the team’s lead medic

The majority of people in both teams suffered relatively significant injuries, it was likely for all of them to survive, but very few of them were actually in a jovial mood

In fact, everyone was quite literally bickering their heads off

Boomerang was mad at blackguard for selling the team out, bloodsport was annoyed with peacemaker for trying to keep the information, harley was just trying to figure out what the hell TDK’s ability was, and no one knows why thinker was even with the group

Either way, it was a mess of criminals arguing with criminals about the whole situation

You were bandaging a few bullet wounds on javelin when you heard the sound of a gunshot

Turns out the argument escalated when bloodsport made fun of peacemaker's tighty whities and now you have to try and restrain everyone from murdering each other (again)

Hearing the commotion from the other room, colonel flag immediately stepped in and shot down the whole argument with just a few words, it was almost funny how all it took for the guy was to tell everyone to get their shit together for them to actually get their shit together

Turning towards you, it wasn't the first time that rick apologized for the mayhem that was caused by his teammates, but considering the fact he's the only normal one you could talk to, you didn't mind the company

You continued your work while flag was discussing the next mission with the rest of the group, you were sewing up an injury on boomerang's face when the criminal asked if you and rick were dating

The abrupt question came to a surprise to you, as you never really thought about it in that sort of sense, but you knew that rick was a good man who most likely needed a break from the bullshit that was the suicide squad

You turned around and noticed harley talking to rick, opting to eavesdrop in on the chat, you heard a very similar conversation to the one you had with boomerang

Apparantly harley has been egging on flag to ask you out as well

From the looks of it, it appears that he's got a bit of a crush on you

You sighed and continued your work, secretly hoping that rick would take harley's advice

#Sorry if I focused too much on the team dynamic haha #the suicide squad x reader #the suicide squad #rick flag #rick flag x reader #my writing #gender neutral reader

[wonderfulworldofmichaelford]

Psycho Analysis: Suicide Squad Team A

(WARNING! This analysis contains SPOILERS! Seriously, as soon as you click that read more, you’re gonna be smacked with SPOILERS! Don’t say I didn’t give you ample warning this time!)

The world’s in danger yet again, and Amanda Waller is in need of some expendable forces to take on some dirty jobs in the name of preserving peace. Last time she did this, it seems like she hired the wrong people. Nice guy Will Smith Deadshot? Bland, boring Killer Croc? El Diablo, who became attached to a bunch of reprobates after spending a couple hours with them? The only one who was useful in that squad was Katana. She had their backs, could cut all of them in half with one sword stroke just like mowing the lawn, and her sword traps the souls of its victims. Unfortunately, she was decidedly not expendable, so what is a girlboss like Waller to do?

Easy: Assemble a brand new squad of criminals to do the dirty work. Harley and Boomerang are the only ones she brought back, because let’s be real, they’re the only ones we give a damn about. Filling out the rest of the squad are the stoic, craggy crackshot Savant; the handsome, German spear-thrower Javelin; the alien warrior Mongal; the frothing, psychotic animal Weasel; the confident and all-powerful TDK; and Blackguard, who is literally just a guy. Together, this team gets deployed to Corto Maltese to do what no one else can do, and with skills like theirs, they are absolutely unstoppable!

They all fucking die before the opening credits.

Motivation/Goals: Considering the goal of the squad is to shave time off their prison sentences by going on the mission, it’s ostensibly the reason every single one of these goons accepted the job. Savant and Weasel are pretty well established in this regard; we get to focus on Savant for much of the opening, so we can get a sense of him, and Weasel is stated to have murdered no less than 27 children. So, yeah, they need to do this mission.

The rest, though? Who knows! Why are Mongal, Javelin, and TDK in prison? How did they even get an alien like Mongal? What did they do to land in the position they’d need to go on a suicide mission? Why doesn’t this movie have flashy, intrusive cards explaining everything to us in a throwaway gag in a montage?!

Blackguard, at least, has some other motivation. He sold out the entire squad to the military of Corto Maltese, which is why they’re ambushed. Now, there’s actually some ambiguity here: Did he do this of his own volition, and was this a complete surprise, or is it, as it is heavily implied, all part of Waller’s plan and she let this happen as a diversion for the other team to get in unnoticed?

Honestly, though, it doesn’t matter what their goals are. They’re all dead within five minutes of the movie starting, with one exception.

Performance: So, the reason these guys are even worth talking about is because, despite their minuscule screentime, all of their actors manage to cram in enough humor and characterization that they’re all pretty fun and likable. Michael Rooker is as stony and stoic as ever as Savant (until he hilariously isn’t), Flula Borg’s Javelin is really sweet and charming in his interactions with Harley, and Pete Davidson’s Blackguard is just amazingly douchey and pathetic. Special mention goes to Nathan Fillion’s TDK, who has an utterly endearing and unwavering faith in his astoundingly crappy ability to… detach his arms. It’s honestly kind of beautiful. Then there’s Weasel as portrayed by Sean Gunn, who is just a hilarious crackhead of an animal man.

Final Fate: Literally every single one of them die horribly thanks to Blackguard’s betrayal. He’s the first to go, because as soon as he walks out saying “Hey guys, it’s me, the one who contacted you!” he literally has his face blasted clean off. The rest go soon after. Mongal, in one of the most astounding moments of idiocy I’ve ever seen, leaps on a helicopter despite Rick Flag telling her specifically not to. Her weight and strength send it careening out of control, which leads to it shredding Captain Boomerang to bits before exploding, burning her alive as she painfully screams and writhes in agony. TDK gets his arms shot into Swiss cheese, leading to him bleeding out since even detached they still are part of him. Javelin is also shot, but gets a dying moment with Harley where he passes her Checkov’s Javelin. Finally, after witnessing all of this carnage, Savant completely loses his shit and tries to swim away, leading to Waller blowing his head up.

You may be wondering what happened to Weasel. He appears to drown as soon as the Squad deploys, because despite being actually smart in this movie, Waller forgot to make sure everyone on the Squad could swim. Thankfully, this lovable child-murdering crackhead rodent was just sleeping, and wakes up in the first credit scene.

Best Scene: Obviously, it’s their one and only scene. It’s a magnificent slaughter that puts the X-Force scene from Deadpool 2 to shame.

Final Thoughts & Score: I’ve gotta hand it to James Gunn. Even though these losers are only onscreen for a few minutes, they all get to cram a lot of charm and personality into that time, to the point it’s actually kind of sad seeing them all die. It’s a beautiful mix of comedy and tragedy. Since their screentime is so limited, though, I’m mostly going to be grading them on style, performance, and so on rather than on villainy like normal. They are all bad guys, as they don’t really get a chance to redeem themselves like the other Squad, so I’m still counting them as villains, which means they could potentially score above an 8 (which is the highest score I’m willing to give heel-face turn villains, because they end up being better as characters in general than as villains).

I’m also not going to talk about Boomerang (I’ll talk about him when I review the original Squad) or Harley (because she not only lives, but deserves her own solo Psycho Analysis). Now here we go, from best to worst:

TDK

If you thought anyone but TDK would get top marks, you’re sadly mistaken. Seeing Nathan Fillion proudly wield the insanely lame power to detach his arms to lightly tap soldiers on the head and gently grab their guns is a sight I never knew I needed to see until this movie. The fact he just seems so darn proud about this power that he doesn’t even bother to use in any way that would be remotely useful is honestly really endearing. Frankly, the sheer fact they adapted Arms-Fall-Off Boy in any way is enough for me to give him a 10/10.

Weasel

Weasel is just disgustingly delightful. He’s just a horrible, nasty, ugly little bastard… But he’s kind of adorable? He clearly has no idea where he is at any given time and is just so goddamn freaky that I can’t help but love him. The fact that, despite being a character who in the comics is noteworthy only for dying on his first mission with the Squad, he manages to survive the entire movie is pretty impressive. Hopefully he comes back in the future, but either way he gets an 8/10 from me.

Javelin

Honestly, aside from Boomerang, his death stung the most. He’s just so cute and charming, and he doesn’t even get to fling his javelin at anyone! Thankfully, he passes it on to Harley, and boy does she ever get to use it! He’s so cute, I have to give him an 8/10. I just wish we got more of him.

Savant

Savant is just an absolutely hilarious bait-and-switch. We follow him through the prologue, with everything seeming to point to him as our main character and the Squad leader. He’s stoic, he’s cranky, and he has impeccable aim… and then we get to the beach and he just freaks the hell out and starts screaming and crying and running away like a little bitch. Seeing Michael Rooker act like he’s shitting his pants after playing a badass like Yondu is just the sort of hilarious subversiveness that James Gunn loves to do when you let him loose. The fact that he looks like, to paraphrase the TVTropes YMMV page for the movie, a “cyberpunk Tommy Wiseau” is the icing on this 7/10 cake.

Blackguard

I was prepared to hate this guy just based on how lame Pete Davidson’s costume was, and you know what? I do hate him. But I love to hate him. He’s just an utterly pathetic scoundrel and a coward, true to his name. The fact he is the first to die, as just about everyone predicted, and is killed absolutely gruesomely makes any annoyance he could provide moot, and his freeakout over being seated next to Weasel on the plane is actually kind of funny. I was originally going to give him a 6, but you know what? He can have a low 7/10. He’s like the only member of this particular Squad to actually do anything evil, so I gotta give him props for that.

Mongal

Let me make this perfectly clear: I do not blame James Gunn or actress Mayling Ng. I’m not actually mad at either of them for what they chose to do, because it is ultimately hilarious and sad. It suited the narrative of the film, and I’m not actually, genuinely mad.

With all that out of the way, Mongal is one hell of a stupid cunt. It is one thing to cause your own death with your stupidity, it is something else entirely to cause the death of a beloved character with your poorly planned attack. The fact she didn’t take into account how her weight and strength would effect an airborne helicopter makes one wonder if she is really supposed to be based on a character who can take on Superman and live to tell about it.

Let’s compare her to two similar characters to really show how bad she is. Like Blackguard, she is directly responsible for a death on the beach, Blackguard being responsible for everyone by selling them out and leading them into an ambush (and yes, I’m including him as well), and Mongal killing Boomerang with the chopper. The difference is, Blackguard’s betrayal was deliberate, he meant to sell the team out, he was actively doing something evil there, while Mongal killed Boomerang out of sheer idiocy.

Now, let’s compare her to Zeitgeist from the similar bloody massacre that occurred during X-Force’s deployment in Deadpool 2. Like Mongal, he accidentally kills a teammate. The difference is, in the case of Zeitgeist, he only accidentally melted Peter, it was a freak accident, and ultimately it does get undone by the end. Meanwhile, Mongal made a conscious, stupid decision and ended up killing her squadmate with her own idiocy. She sucks, hardcore. I don’t do this lightly, but I’m giving her a 1/10. Villains just don’t get much stupider than her.

I will giver her this, though: the makeup work on her is good. She’s lowkey kinda hot if I’m being honest. But being hot and having good makeup does not a good villain make.

#Psycho Analysis #The Suicide Squad #Savant #Michael Rooker #Javelin #Flula Borg #TDK #Nathan Fillion #Weasel #Sean Gunn #Mongal #Mayling Ng #Blackguard #Pete Davidson

[mirrorfalls]

The Joker 80th Anniversary Super Spectacular (2020)

“So Lego,” said nobody ever. “Now that you’re got some decent free time and the spoons to write, what are you gonna do? Get some actual work done on that Detective Conan longfic you’ve been rattling about the last two years? Actually start your long-overdue cert paper, that thing you need to graduate?”

Oooof course not! Instead, let’s dive back into the wonderful world of Cape Comix, featuring Tumblr’s least-wanted villain! Will any of these ten little tales actually manage to find something new - or at least interesting - to say about Laughing Boy? Let’s find out.

“Scars” by Scott Snyder and Jock. A pretty typical Snyder gonzo-horror jaunt, complete with “haha, the Joker really is the godmode manipulator/killer you’ve been denying he was all story! Sucks to be you!” ending. It’s stories like these that make me wonder why the hell Bruce’s rogues gallery even needs Scarecrow anymore, even in concept.

“What Comes at the End of a Joke” by James Tynion IV and Mikel Janin. Ahh, Christ, why didn’t I expect there’d be a Joker War tie-in somewhere in this... Well, there ya have it, the Secret Origin of Punchline. There’s a germ of an interesting idea here, likening the Joker’s “the hell with anything else, I just want to fuck over The Powers That Be” influence on Gotham’s youth to the Alt-Right’s influence in real life, but even then I reckon other writers have already done it better.

“Kill the Batman” by Gary Whitta, Greg Miller, and Dan Mora. The first creative team I had to look up - apparently, one of ‘em used to run IGN, and the other co-wrote Rogue One. This is also the first one built as a comedy, which I approve of in theory; in execution, though, the setup is a bit too mawkish for its own good (not to mention way too eager to quote-mine Chris Nolan) the last-page punchline is exactly the kind of dad humor our “hero” was complaining about halfway through the story. All in all, I’d still recommend “Going Sane” as a better take on the whole premise.

“Introducing the Dove Corps” by Denny O’Neil and Jose Luis Garcia-Lopez. Guys, whatever differences I’ve had with his work over the years, I really wanted to report that O’Neil went out on a high note. And I will say this one probably has the strongest premise in the whole book, with Joker trying to not only (gasp!) play hero but (horrors!) do it without bloodshed. O’Neil doesn’t quite cheat the premise, but the story is still bogged down with at least one unleapable logic hole (a Special Forces Team doesn’t know who the fucking Joker is?!), a bunch of pointless continuity-mining (See! The origin of TKJ’s tourist getup!), and a predictable-as-hell ending. Whatever faults the other stories may have, none of them end on a line as hacky as “Killing is so much fun.”

“The War Within” by Peter Tomasi and Simone Bianchi. Okay, first thing - it’s not “Batman/Badman” levels of faux-cleverness, but it’s not quite out of that ballpark. There’s no real plot outside the narration (except maybe to set up some future arc in Tomasi’s Detective), just Bianchi doing a Joker-through-the-ages showcase. Said showcase hits most of the obligatory choices - Golden Age, Silver Age, TKJ, TDK, TDKR - but I will say I was pleasantly surprised to see The Batman’s Joker getting a shout-out, dreads and all.

“The Last Smile” by Paul Dini and Riley Rossmo. Huh. Wasn’t expecting to see Dini do a riff on Joker: Devil’s Advocate of all things - and only slightly that it would average out as the best story in here. After his less-than-stellar writing on the Arkham games, it’s heartening to see Dini’s still got some of the old magic, with a genuinely insightful look into what might scare the Joker: the possibility that Batman can have his cake and eat it too, can get rid of his not-so-eternal dance partner without endangering his precious code, because sometimes, the law is good for something after all. Kudos, too, for a more creative use of Harley - and rapport with Ivy - than years and years of Harley-centric media have ever managed.

“Birthday Bugs” by Tom Taylor and Eduardo Risso. A strong competitor to the previous one - you can almost never go wrong with “the Joker tries to do something nice for an innocent” as a premise - with some choice lines that carry the theme smoothly without ever feeling like grandstanding. That said, Risso’s art is a lot more hit-and-miss than Rossmo’s - some panels are absolutely beautiful, but others - especially if Joker’s actually in them - just look hideously tryhard - and the gore in the last couple pages feels more cheap than disturbing.

“No Heroes” by Eduardo Medeiros and Rafael Albuquerque. See previous opening line. The themes discussed here (why be a hero for a soulless Capitalist engine?) are a little triter, not helped by the fact that the story’s not really long enough to let them breathe properly, but the art is on the whole a lot stronger; and in an age where artists are falling over themselves to out-demonic each others’ Jokers, I especially dig the choice to put him in a mask for most of the story, rooting his scariness in unmoving minimalism instead of hyperexaggerating every wrinkle and pore of his face,

“Penance” by Tony Daniel. Ah, yes. The perennial weak-link of the Reborn era and the inventor of that whole skinned-face idiocy back at the start of the New 52, Daniel’s turn here... threatens to be interesting a few times, but never manages to get all its ideas into anything coherent, much less good in execution. Shame, really - apart from “Birthday Bugs” it’s the only one to focus on “normal” crooks, a perennially underrated element in Joker romps.

“Two Fell Into The Hornet’s Nest” by Brian Azzarello & Lee Bermejo. This was the one I was least looking forward to... and it looks like ol’ Brian anticipated that, given the line (”Have you checked the credits on who’s writing this?”) he kicks off page two with. I suppose it, more than any of the other stories, cut to the heart of what the Joker’s stream-of-consciousness should look like - but that doesn’t really stop it from feeling like something Azzarello cranked out on a lunch break. Even random nonsense needs to be handled with care to not feel like waste of the reader’s time - and whatever else this one has going for it (I did smile a little the nurse taunting Joker about being as much an empty corporate symbol as Batman himself), care's not really on the menu. Stick with his Calvin & Hobbes parody from Superman/Batman #75.

So there ya have it - three (possibly four) stories I’d legitimately read again, surrounded by a sea of mediocrity and misfires (and some intermittently interesting pinups - JRJR’s Joker-as-007 piece hit my sweet-spot best). That’s honestly a better record than I would’ve expected for the J-Man in 2020 - better, by all accounts, than the 80th super-spectacular the Robins got.

Would it have been too much to ask the Lego Batman guys to contribute something, though?

#Joker #Lego has too much time

[lazzyoh]

Act; HL!Joker x Reader

Request; Heya! Could you maybe do a one- or two-shot about how the Heath Ledger Joker of TDK and the Reader meet? Like Maybe him blowing up a Party her parents held or smth and the Reader having a Special quirk… like Illusion or something? Thank you!

Warnings: Actually no important one, might contain a little swearing and strong language… cursing even… OH! and threatening yk ;)

Side note: no genderfriendly pronouns! Female!Reader; she/her; I decided to give her the skill/quirk of faking and copying others emotions (only their facial expressions and behavoir + sensing them (I forgot to Mention that earlier))… I think it’s a pretty cool thing and abolutely makeable without the Risk of being only fictional or overpowered

Everything clear? Fine. Then let’s go get it started!

                      ————-Part Two————-

,,No you ain't dollie, you surely ain't"

I stayed still, refused to show him more of my little speciality, he eyed me like a little boy who just found his favorite toy again, after missing it for years. ,,Tell me Pretty...", he circled me as if he'd be a lion waiting for the right moment to rip me, his prey, into pieces, his gloved fingers grabbed a strand of my (Your/Hair/Color) hair, wrapping it around his leather glove while looking me over causally, licking his scars for the sixth time now, ,,What makes you think... that I... wouldn't see through your pretty little... act?" The Joker started to snicker again, huskily this time, almost as if he screamed so much that his voice started to fade now. I ignored the fact how near he was, decided to instead, only watch him closely and try to make up what exactly he wanted from me.

❦

,,Because no one ever did." I answered sober and honest. He just started to laugh loudly and held himself up with his hands on his knees. ,,Oh, you're a funny little thing!" He brandished his pointer-finger wildly in front of my nose, ,,You know.. other women only cry and beg when confronted with me... but you.. you are NOTHING like that... ha! You're... you're self-confident... brave... and... and .. fearless... so much that you even try playing me a fool! oH... and you did all that WELL, I almost believed you!" And once again the green haired started circling me, his fingers lightly stroke over my naked shoulders as he passed them. ,,But..." He stopped right behind me, his heavy breathing hitting the back of my ear, ,,... do you wanna know...", I resisted the urge to shudder as his cold gloved hands grabbed my shoulders firmly from behind, ,,... how I noticed..?"

                            🃏

,,How...?" My answer wasn't more than a whiffing, too distracted by his hands holding onto my shoulder firmly and the way he pressed his chest against my back to whisper in my ear to pay Attention to the actual Situation I was in. ,,Your eyes, honey, your eyes." I slightly turned to him, meeting his intimidating gaze again ,,What do you mean by that?" My brows were forrowed while he just started to snicker again, before patting my head half-heartedly, ,,Oh love... do you know why I prefer using a knife instead of guns?" circling me again, but this time watching every single move I did and pulling a knife out of one of his many pockets, made me a little nervous but even more excited than scared. ,,Because guns are too fast?" I blindely guessed, making his once moitionless face light up within seconds, ,,Ahahahahah! YOU'RE GOOD!" He turned towards the growd pushed in the Corners of the ball room, which he only successfully ignored until now, laughing pleased and loudly, ,,Isn't she amazing?!"

                            ❦

His Henchmen nodded to answer him, he only rolled his eyes before turning to me again. ,,Right, Princess, you're right. - They are too fast. You can't see all the Little emotions hiding in peoples eyes when killing them with a gun... but if you use a knife..." He giggled darkly while, stalking through the room, past the guests and my family, innocently playing with his knife. ,,Let me tell you Pretty..." He turned around abruptly and looked at me, brandishing the knife before himself admonishingly, ,,In the last seconds before death... People show you who they really are." He let out a spitefully chortle before, for the fifth time in a row, running his fingers through his dyed hair , ,,Eyes tell you alot my love... and yours told me how and what you really thought and felt..." He came stalked back to me, giggling maliciously and sending glares at me, that almost screamed how screwed I was now - but instead of ramming the knife into my heart or throat he only stopped and started to giggle uncontrollably, the whole room held a deadly silence within while his attack.

                            🃏

,,They showed me how annoyed you were, how much you wanted to be somewhere else... but the only thing I can't quite put my finger on is...." His hand softly caressed my neck while he came nearer, bending close to my ear before wrapping his fingers around my throat and applying slight pressure. My heart fluttered. ,,Why would ya want to leave a Party like this?" I looked at him embarrassed by how his moves and his closeness affected me. His fingers grabbed my chin and cheeks in a firm but still gentle way, forcing me to stare back at him. I felt dizzy, my head somewhat clouded, he hypnotized me with his eyes and voice, lulled me in with his scent. I couldn't hold myself from talking, it felt as if he'd be able to ask me anything and I wouldn't even be able to lie. ,,B..ecause I'm not willed to play the toy for my parents sake again.. I don't want to give my body to someone I don't even know." My eyes were focused on his as I whispered my answer, insecurely waiting for his answer... wanting to hear his answer... I needed to hear it.

                            ❦

He narrowed his brows peeved, watched my face closely for a few minutes before finally lifting up his gaze and scanning the room. ,,Who?" He mumbled absent minded, and with that pulling me out of my trance, slapping me right back into reality. ,,What do you plan on doing with her, Joker?!" Both, the Joker and I, looked at the Boy that was angrily starring at the purple-wearing man, irritated and annoyed. Surely the stupid idiot wasn't only the 'Starring you naked'-Type but also the 'I'm dumb please kill me' too. Laughters bubbled out of the madman holding my face gently but tight between his gloved fingers. ,,Who are you to ask that?"  The Joker seemed pretty pissed now, turning his eyes on me, ,,Ouch sweets, you never told me that you've got yourself a boyfriendy." He grinned down at me, changing his Expression into faking a sad and disappointed one before finally giggling at my "are-you-Fucking-kidding-me?" expression. ,,He's not my boyfriend!" I spat out, ,,I'd rather die than talk to him in any way!" That seemed to change the whole situation alot, firstly he looked at me  flabbergasted before something in his lunatic mind seemed to switch and made him stare the idiot down with a deadly glare.

                            🃏

,,Pretty doesn't seem to like you much my friend..." His gloved hands gave my face free again, now he moved away, stalking towards the idiot who's most likely soon to be death. ,,Not a single bit... her eyes told me..." As he was the Clown prince of Crime and normally everything but calm, his voice alerted me immediately, I couldn't decide if I whether should let him go or try to hold him back. The anger that boiled in him would've stayed uncovered... and if I wouldn't posses that special little skill of mine, I wouldn't have noticed - but I did. I took a few steps towards him, but that's when he already had slammed the knife he played with before, into the, now scared, boys throat. ,,That's why you need to leave." The room was filled with short, shocked breaths, ,,J!"  I yelped indignantly and reproachful, making him turn to me with an almost innocent look in his eyes, ,,What's the matter dear? You said you'd rather die than talk to him ever again..." Within a two of his large steps he stood in front of me again, ,,... but I don't want you to die Sweets - So I had to kill him.~"

                            ❦

I shook my head at this, ,,Why would you, the Clown Prince of Crime, King of Gotham, want someone, meaningless and normal, like me to stay alive?" I asked, my voice dripping of pure sarcasm and disbelieve. He grunted amused while letting his fingers trace over my left arm as if in trance, ,,Because..." He came so close that his nose tip touched mine, ,,I kinda like you, huh... couldn't live with knowing you're dead." He murmured raspyly, making me blush due to his honest and solid stare and words. Destroying the tension within seconds - wether to save himself from emotions or simply because he's a love-numb dick, who knows that - he loudly clapped his Hands together, ,,Nevermind! Guys, we needa go, get me the... äehm.... corpse over there... and get'em in the car!" His henchmen did as they were told to, he only watched them enthusiasticly before turning to me again, ,,Oh... I nearly forgot...", he stopped and bowed slightly, offering his hand to me and grinning at me from underneath, ,,Will you do me the honor of accompanying me?"

                            🃏

For the first time since he and his henchmen showed up I lifted my head and allowed my eyes to scan the room, stopping at my parents that were watching me intensly. I perceived what they wanted me to do and say, they wanted me to stay so they could go on with using me - but I was done. Done with it all. And thinking about going and leaving together with the Joker seemed to be the only thing, in my whole life until now, that made sense to me. So I did it. Not bothering to give my parents a last look or goodbye I accepted Jokers hand and let myself get pulled out and into the pitch black Transporter with him. Immediantly after entering he let himself fall down on the seat, pulling me with him and with one swift move into his lap, holding me tightly by the waist in place. Barking a few commands to his henchmen he nearly forgot my existence but only until I leaned against him, feeling tired after all this chaos, drawing his attention on me with that. He gave me a smuggy smile, ,,Oh my, I see someone's tired, I ain't chu princess?~"  I laughed silently, cuddling myself into his side as he lifted my legs so I could comfortably sit. ,,Sleep my dear, when you wake up you'll wake up to a new day... a new life... a new start."

He was right... and goddamn... taking J's Hand was the best thing I could ever have done.

                            ❦ 🃏 ❦ 🃏 ❦ 🃏 ❦ 🃏 ❦ 🃏 ❦

Word Count: 1.735

#heath ledger #joker #tdk #tdk joker #request #twoshot #reader

[disinvited-guest]

6/15/18 Recap

It was probably an illogical decision to go to this show, but it was also an excellent one.  This show was absolutely bursting with energy, joy, and humor.

I got a bit later start than I wanted, turns out it’s harder to get out of the house quickly when everyone else is up and getting ready for their day at the same time.  Driving east as the sun was rising was less than ideal, and I made bad time after two rest-station stops and a longer lunch than I wanted.  I finally got there a few minutes before 4 and met up with @littlemissterter (Teralyn).  We  met and talked with a whole bunch of other fans as we waited (including @teedeekay who gave me a das pendant, stood to block the sun from my eyes, and was generally super nice). 

An hour before doors, we were funneled into a hot, loud metal room where we waited until we could get into the venue.  Once in, I snagged a spot only just in the front row, as far left as someone could stand without being entirely blocked by the amp.  The stage was small enough that they had adjusted their setup, placing the keyboard far to stage left (our right).  

The guys came onstage with New York City, and it was clear they were happy to be performing together again, even if they were a bit crowded together by the lack of space  on the stage.   Throughout the first few songs, Danny gave a smile or nod to everyone he knew in the front, which amounted to nearly the whole front row (myself included!).  I noticed that Linnell had kept his beard (this was just after the Tony ceremony pictures had caused a bit of a ruckus).

After the song was over, everyone onstage was trying to work out sound issues.  We were told that they were receiving secret messages by way of explanation.

Marty needed some adjustments in his ear monitors and leaned out over his drums to shout to the crew.  The crew member he was shouting to evidently didn’t notice, but it did attract the attention of both Dans, who both went over to Marty to ask what the issue was, then got the attention of someone off the other side to fix the problem.

After the sound issues seemed mostly fixed, they moved on into Fingertips which, as always, is fantastic live.  

After that, there were more issues with the  sound to be straightened out “Welcome to our soundcheck,” Flans told us.  They both were told to talk so they could sort out the levels and Flans relayed those instructions to us.  Danny stepped up to a mic to tell the crew he wanted Flans’ vocals up and Linnell’s vocals down in his monitors and Linnell pretended to be hurt by the request.

The sound once again sorted out, Flans started to introduce the next song as from their new album, but noticed Dan and Danny whispering in the back and asked if there was a problem.  Linnell told his they were discussing a later part of the show and Flans replied sarcastically “Now is a good time to discuss it.”

The song Flans was introducing turned out to be the always entertaining Let’s Get This Over With, with Linnell at his accordion mic where I  could actually see him.  While Linnell switched back to keyboards, Flans told us that “We can’t talk about current events because it’s “‘all a hoax’” Then explained “this pause when we would say something.”  Danny came up to Flans and told him he could talk about Paul Manafort, and Flans said “Oh yeah, we can talk about that.  On behalf of Paul Manafort, ‘I did it, I’m guilty, I’d like to say I’m so sorry to Putin and all of the Russians.’”

I think this was when Flans and Linnell discussed their ongoing and upcoming projects.  Linnell commented that he liked that they were pretending it was a private conversation and that the audience wasn’t here.  Flans replied that the crowd was loving it, which got a cheer.

After Don’t Let’s Start, Flans told us that earlier that day he was driving through “What can only be described as a ‘rural part of the state,’”  and saw a sign advertising that fireworks were ‘now available to local residents’.

He asked the crowd what that was about, and someone answered in a drunken shout “Because we’re the Replacements.”

Linnell peered into the part of the crowd the answer had come from and commented “That answer makes as much sense as the sign does.”

Flans then commented that, from an entrepreneurial standpoint, only selling to people from out of state made sense. “Blow up your own turf!”

Your Racist Friend was next, with Curt making his grand entrance and blowing everyone away as always.

Flans forgot the lyrics at the beginning of one of the verses to this song.  Dan was behind him, and either mouthed or sang the lyrics at him (sans mic, so I couldn’t tell) until he recovered.

Linnell switched to his accordion for Whistling in the Dark, introducing it by saying “I forget which album this is on.”

Linnell then switched from the accordion to the contra alto clarinet.  Flans first introduced it correctly as the contra alto clarinet, then second-guessed himself, saying it was the contra bass clarinet before asking Linnell, who confirmed it was contra alto.  After Flans made another incorrect comment, Linnell jokingly replied “I hate to keep correcting you, but-” and they got into a discussion about  couples counseling for bands.  Apparently Linnell and Dan had been talking about it earlier that day, and a group who it didn’t work for.  Dan kept coming up to Linnell with comments about it, and Linnell would respond off-mic and then they would both crack up.  Linnell had Flansburgh try to guess what band it was, but was so distracted by Dan that Flans eventually gave up and they started into All Time What.  

From there they went straight into Mrs. Bluebeard, then paused only for Flans to tell us that “In the ideal version of the show, the transition between these songs is a seamless segway.” before starting into This Microphone.

The Dans left the stage and Marty grabbed his bell for Shoehorn With Teeth.  The bell was introduced, then the Johns discussed the Glockenspiel they used to have, Flans pointed out TDK in the front row, and said they gave it to him, but they weren’t sure what city they gave it away in.

Curt’s Euphonium was introduced as being worth $800 when melted down.  Curt jokingly took offense at that, until Flans continued “in its current form: priceless.”

After Shoehorn, Flans reintroduced Dan and Danny, saying that the Dans had returned and that it was “all gonna be alright.”

They then played I Left My Body, Damn Good Times, and Particle Man without pause.  They had a bit of trouble getting the clapping going for Particle Man.  Flans had to restart it a few times, and it never really got going like it usually does.  Marty took advantage of the  interlude, which was Here You Come Again, to shove half of a protein bar in his mouth. Dan used the time to switch from guitar to keyboard, which he played for the rest of the song and stayed on for Doctor Worm, which closed out the set.  They held the last note for a long time like they have been at the end of sets, to be honest, I’m not a big fan of it.  My asthmatic self can only cheer for so long at once!

During the break between sets, I was treated to a view of Marty backstage air drumming to the between-set mix.  He was really into it, with the same head-bobbing, foot-tapping, face-making intensity he has onstage.  It was adorably wonderful.

The Johns and Marty came back onstage to start the Quiet Storm section of the show with Older.  Marty wanted his sound adjusted during this song, so he would play his part, use the last motion to turn so he was facing backstage, and give the crew feedback in the tiny pause.  I wasn’t sure how helpful that was to the crew, but they got it sorted out and I was impressed with Marty’s multitasking skills.

Flans introduced the Quiet storm as Always Quiet and Often Stormy, reintroduced Curt, then told us that they had “just got back from a session with our couples counselor,” and that they felt closer and knew each other  better.  He and Linnell riffed on this idea for a bit before Flans introduced I Like Fun as “The title track off the new album-”

“Finally!” Linnell interjected

“-who’s all important second verse has become even more relevant.” Flans finished, referring to him now being 58.

Flans introduced Tippecanoe and Tyler Too by telling us “Seven or eight minutes into our session, we realized we had to leave to go back onstage, and our therapist said ‘you know, people really like your old songs’ so this is a special long-distance dedication to our couples therapist.”

They played Self Called Nowhere, then How Can I Sing Like A Girl, with Flans introducing it while Linnell had already started the accordion part, to finish the Quiet Storm.  

Curt had to literally run to grab his valve trombone, which wasn’t in it’s usual place, so he could start the intro to Istanbul. There’s always so much going on  during this song that I never get tired of it.  

Curt’s ending to the song was so ridiculously good that it wowed the rest of the guys onstage as well as the crowd. The Johns joked that all people from Connecticut could play trumpet like that, and Linnell said that he’d heard “Katharine Hepburn play that exact same solo.” He tried to continue the joke, but could only come up with one other person from Connecticut, and asked Flans if he knew any others.

Flans responded that he had worked for a lady who’s mother grew up in the same town as Katharine Hepburn, and that she would call the office and ask in that same voice ‘Is Elizabeth there?’  

“And she played a mean jazz trumpet!” Linnell added, before telling us that Curt spoke exactly like Katharine Hepburn too.

They then played When Will You Die, with Linnell singing “This is Dan and that’s Dan-ny,” but not adding Curt’s name in like he has been.

Let Me Tell You About My Operation was especially wild.  Flans accidentally dropped his pick in front of TDK, who picked it up and handed it to me! It was tortoiseshell with Flans on it in a Flood logo type pattern.

I forget how it came up, but Flans returned to the couples counseling joke, saying that was where they learned about ‘radical honesty’.  Linnell told us all that they would probably not talk about couples counseling tomorrow and Flans added that it was a  “special bonus for today.”

They played Wicked Little Critta then Twisting, with Flans explaining to us that they were intentionally skipped a song.  Apparently this was the part of the show where his guitar was at its loudest and it was “scrambling his brains” so he needed time to recover.  

After Twisting, they plugged some ongoing projects, threatening “direct eye-contact” for those who didn’t know about 2018 dial-a-song.  They mentioned the Lincoln remaster, and being near Lancaster again “in this calendar year.”

Flans introduced the next song as from The Else, but told us “Don’t cheer i probably got it wrong!”  He was right though, as they then played The Mesopotamians.  Marty morphed the end of it into the start of Ana Ng, which is absolutely fantastic to witness.  

Flans started the first Encore by introducing the band and then they played Hey Mr. DJ.  They did some of the fade out, then faded back in to finish.  They then played Spy.  For the ending, Linnell used the “now the night is gone” sample he’s been using, but gradually replaced the sample by screaming it into the mic over what the rest of the guys were playing.  He gave control over to Flans but continued in that vein.   Flans alternated with that and pushing his strings to the mic-stand, then brought the audience in at the end.

Coming onstage for the second encore, Flans wished a Happy Birthday to a guy in the balcony who had been holding a sign about it all night.  They played Birdhouse in Your Soul, then Flans had the house lights turned up so he could make direct eye-contact with members of the crowd to thank them for coming.

They finished the night with End of the Tour.  From his spot upstage, Danny mouthed the lyrics to the entire first verse, which was adorable.  

Afterwards, Danny came out in a bit of a hurry, and gave out three of the setlists (one of them to me) before rushing back offstage.  Marty came out to give out the rest of the setlists, his drumsticks (One of which he threw into the balcony!), and the drumhead.  TDK gestured Marty should give the drumhead to me.  I was trying to think of a polite way to say that he had already given me one in Indianapolis (getting two seemed unfair to everyone else), but wasn't sure exactly how to do that.  Marty said something to TDK and handed the drumhead to a girl next to me.  I started to leave and look for Teralyn, when TDK told me that Marty had told him I had already got one.

I found Teralyn, who wanted a picture with Marty, so we headed back up to the edge of the stage. Marty was finishing up signing, so I gave away the rest of my magnets while we waited.  He was about to leave when Teralyn managed to get to the front and ask him for a picture.  I took it for them, then Marty checked with me to make sure he had already given me a drumhead before leaving.

(I’m just going to freak out about this a tiny bit here: I knew that Marty recognized me from show to show on my week long run, but I never guessed he’d remember me, or that he also recognised me from the February shows!)

On our way out we stopped at the bar, where I tried to by a bottle of water, but we both got free ice waters instead (Thank you nice bartender lady!).  Teralyn wanted to wait by the bus for the guys and I agreed to go with her, even though I needed to get started on the drive home and was really nervous about the concept. I was really glad that I did, because it was well worth it!

When we got to the back of the venue, there was no bus, but there were a few other groups waiting. One family assured us that this was where the performers would be leaving.  We started noticing the New York license plates on the parked cars and realized that the guys had driven there themselves.

Flans exited the venue, now wearing an orange t-shirt and without his glasses on.  Another group asked him to sign some things, but none of them had brought a pen.  I supplied them with my Sharpie (I hope Flans wasn’t upset with me for ruining his excuse) and eventually got him to sign the cloth square I had brought.

As Flans was signing it, he asked me what it was.  I told him I was going to whipstitch it onto a blanket I was crocheting.  He seemed pleasantly surprised by this and said “Oh! You crochet! Have you started knitting yet?”

Then, instead of some platitude, my stupid smartass mouth responded without consulting my brain “Nope, crocheting is just knitting for lesbians!”

“Oh, that’s not true.  Knitting is knitting for lesbians,” Flans told me, as I was still realizing what I had said.  As he handed me back my cloth and sharpie, he looked me in the eyes and said “Don’t give up on knitting.”

He headed around to the drivers side of his car, telling the group he had a 4 hour drive.  As he was getting in, someone asked him a question about the car and he stopped to tell us all about it.  Apparently he’s had it for a while, and it was the first car he ever bought new.  The same person asked if the seat was comfortable, and Flans replied that it was, and that it was “the perfect car to grow old with,” before getting in and closing the door.

He had a little trouble getting out of his spot, and I thoughtlessly headed towards the far side of the car to tell him how much space he had. Luckily, he managed to get out of the spot before I made it over, so I was spared from making a complete fool of myself all over again.

Marty, Dan, and Linnell all came out of the venue together, having all ridden in the same van. Looking only a little panicked Linnell told us they were in a rush and couldn’t sign things, but suggested the alternative of shaking hands, then actually followed through.  I’ve received a handshake from John Linnell!

My sharpie was borrowed again, with another group getting something signed from Marty, before they had everything packed up and drove off.

Curt left a bit later.  Another group had him sign a Why? Vinyl with my Sharpie and he jokingly told them “You know it’s not me on the cover.”

I responded, again without asking my brain, that it looked like him and he said “I get that a lot.” He signed my cloth as well.  I was a little more aggressive asking than I was comfortable with, but it was my Sharpie he was using.

Danny had apparently already left, so I said my goodbyes to Teralyn and headed for my car.  When I got there, I found out the universe had taught me a cruel lesson: the pocket where I had put Flans’ guitar pick had a hole in it and the pick was gone!

#tmbg #recap

[leviticus101st]

Me disliking these films is probably my most unpopular opinion ever.

Let me say this to cover myself. I don’t think the Raimi Spider-Man films are the worst films ever made. I don’t even think they’re terrible, but I do think they are bad. Bad on a lower end of the scale.

I think they are on the level of the Star Wars Prequel trilogy, where the flaws might be what you like them for.

Let’s start this review with the death nail of these movies. The stylization. Like with Into The Spider-Verse, this movie uses comic book style. The difference is that this one does it insanely poorly.

Most of the film transitions are weird. They don’t match the tone that these movies are going for and they consistently made me feel like I was watching the Adam West Batman show.

Even if they didn’t, there are two other major problems for the tone. I’m not gonna beat around the bush. The acting is absolutely terrible. Like, I was not ready for how bad the acting is.

I don’t remember it being as stiff and awkward as it is. You’d expect from all the memes that the acting was constantly over the top and memorable, like Tim Curry or Jim Carrey. But when you get down to it, while there are moments like this, it actually isn’t memorable at all.

All that most of the actors do for the most part is talk in a quiet voice and an awkward tone. The only one who actually feels they were trying is JK Simmons as J.J.J. One actor who played a supporting character put more effort into their performance than the entirety of the main cast.

That astounds me.

The worst of it all is probably from Tobey Mcguire as Peter himself. He does NOT emote well. He’s actually a microcosm of the acting problems.

He just never gives the appropriate reactions to things or the movie’s work will ruin it for him.

The scene where he finds Uncle Ben’s body is the biggest example of this. We shouldn’t see his crying face all scrunched up like that. We should be further away to feel the emotions we should be feeling.

But to be fair, even if they had the best acting in the world, this movie still would not have worked. Why? Because the script is absolute garbage.

You may have noticed that this is a review of all three movies in one chapter and not doing three chapters to review each one. That’s because they all have the same basic plot and the exact same issues.

The scripting demands that Peter and MJ treat each other like shit.  That both of them be absolutely terrible for each other. It demands that right after a serious sequence of Peter getting the symbiote, that there should be a stupid dance scene. It demands that Peter do...whatever the fuck this is.

A wall starts to fall onto MJ. Peter, instead of just grabbing her with his webbing, screams like a banshee.

The scripting lastly demanded that the fight scenes have no excitement whatsoever and just throw in random bullshit.

Let’s see what all of the good stuff Peter and MJ did for each other. They kept secrets that would need to be open in a relationship from each other, MJ straight up cheated on Peter with JJJ’s son because Peter missed her play, and didn't tell him that Harry was losing it.

MJ in these movies is AWFUL! The movies try to paint her as the ‘UWU’ Girl, but her actions are so awful and mean spirited that it makes her look like a miserable piece of shit.

It’s a shame too because her actress was trying her best, but no one could make anyone who says this (MJ: It’s not about you. It’s about me.) look good.

Could you make this kind of relationship work? Yes, but that requires effort and it’s clear that the people behind these movies didn’t want to do that.

The two towers bit is a good example of that. When a Dreamworks kids movie has more balls than you, there’s a problem. Instead of sticking to their guns and making a good reveal, nah let’s just cut out the reveal of Spidey’s costume and put American flags everywhere.

The way that MJ and Peter’s relationship in these movies was handled was so terrible, that I’m willing to bet it played a part in the creation of One More Day. Oh yeah, I’m talking about THAT one eventually! Just you wait.

But Peter doesn’t come out of this movie unscaved, because he is also a miserable piece of shit in these movies. Let me put it like this, he does not develop in ANY positive way throughout these movies. Not once did he change for the better.

He constantly puts his Spider-Man stuff ahead of his loved ones and isn’t given any positive traits. The more I learned about this version of Peter, the more I wanted the villains to win. Like when he's being a creep and looking through his crush’s window. There is nothing to like about him.

Let’s get to the villains. Green Goblin’s stuff was not a good adaptation. The scenes with Norman talking to the goblin persona could have worked, but stupid lines ruined any chance of tension.

Green Goblin: His heart Osborn! We need to attack his heart!

If the movie was trying to portray GG as so far away and cartoony from Norman, it would work, but Norman also acts like a cartoon character (Before and after he injects himself with the serum.), so the contrast is dead on arrival.

Doc Ock is one of those characters who they try to make sympathetic, but fail miserably. The point of sympathy is that his wife died, but that rings hollow when his wife’s death was all his fault.

Also, him turning into Doc Ock is a good instance of the movie’s style ruining thing. The scene where he’s killing the doctors could have been good, but Raimi felt the need to put in so much cartoon shit that it’s just laughable. The nurse scratching the floor is the biggest example of that in the scene.

There’s also him really trying to hit that C note every time he screams. I think he screams to the sky like twice in 2.

Then there’s 3, where the villains are given absolutely nothing. Sandman is there, Harry is also the Green Goblin there, and Venom is there as well.

Could you have made that work? Probably, but, as we established, the people behind the movies didn’t want to put forth any effort to make it work. Raimi himself admitted that Venom was only put into the movie because he was popular.

When people say that these movies are profound labors of love, I’m always baffled. If you genuinely love something, you put in the time to make it good.

You don’t throw in random crap and hope the audience loves it. You make something that you know people will appreciate.

This movie is also very confused about how SM is seen in this world. The scene where those guys start throwing shit at GG and the train scene after SM stopped it are baffling to me.

There was never a point where anyone thought Spider-Man should get their support. You need to build that up. Show Pete saving people, making people admire him, and so on. If you don’t, it looks forced, because it is forced.

The scene in 2 is even more baffling. I’m sorry, but Peter’s identity should have gotten out. There is no believable way that scene would play out like it did and it stretched my disbelief into oblivion.

It says something when a video game adaptation is better than the actual film. No really, the game is better than the movie in every way.

I suppose the last things to talk about are more philosophical in how SM should be handled.

I hate the Raimi costume. Muted colors do not look good for a Peter Parker Spider-Man. The darker red and blue is just ugly and the thick black lines that represent webbing don’t help.

It just looks gaudy and ugly.

The Amazing movies costume also had this problem. It says something when the MCU version got this right.

Then there’s the last thing. I hate how it’s the thing for Uncle Ben to drill the ‘Great Power and Great Responsibility’ into Peter. In the original comic, it was a revelation that Peter came to after Ben’s death. It worked there because it was a result of guilt and a conclusion Peter came to.

By making it Uncle Ben’s catchphrase, you remove the character significance on Peter’s part. It got so bad in these movies that Amazing and MCU went out of their way to not use it.

Granted in the Amazing movies they worded it in a weird way, but still.

And that’s what I think of the Raimi trilogy. This is probably the one that most people are gonna get pissed at me for. It’s a classic for many people, I understand that, but somethings just don’t resonate for some people.

I know what the first thing people are gonna say. ‘You just like the other movies, so you’re putting these films down.’

No that is not what I am doing. I talked about these movies because I have problems with them.

The other films have problems too. The Amazing Films do too much to be generic movie fare, the MCU films push the shared universe angle a bit too hard with Tony Stark, and Into the Spider-Verse has pacing that some might think is too fast with Gwen’s friendship arc being a good example of that.

Everything has problems and attacking people because they talk about them is something that only insecure people do. While I do hate these movies, they did have a big impact on the film world. I personally do think Blade and the TDK trilogy deserve more credit for selling audiences on goofy things, but this film is what sold the general on goofy premises in films. I will grant these movies that.

I refuse to give people crap for liking these movies. All I ask in return is that you don’t give me crap for disliking them. Bring a valid argument sure, but don’t be an asshole about it is all I’m asking.

#Spider-Man #Don't @ me #ltj056 #Review #Going against the Grain #Fanfiction #Plug

[zaraegis]

TDK| Gotham!Blake| T

During the TDK hype, BaneBlake was my jam, and I always loved interactions with the Joker. I also have a deep weakness for personification of cities hnnnn

John waited patiently until the perfect chance, heart pumping in time to the steady dripping echoing in from somewhere in the tunnels. A small part of him felt like blushing, they were in his tunnels! But he was old enough to not be as bashful as a youth. Finally, an opening only he was aware of and he managed to save Commissioner Gordon at least. The water would guide him to safety, he'd make sure of it.

His triumph lasted a small second before he was shoved and subdued onto the cool grate. He'd spooked them, he could tell.  A strange man, coming in and killing their victim in the middle of their "secure" base? That happened to rookies, not the cream of the crop they believed themselves to be.

The one who pinned his arms, a red scarf wearing guy barked out a hostile, "How did you enter?" The other one, the leader had a dangerous boot on the top of his head. John ignored them and relaxed his head against the grate; every sign in his body announced, quite loudly, his fearless state of current existence. "Jim Gordon, he's the best that the Gotham Police Academy has ever trained. Loves his family, and this city." He paused, blinking heavily at the warm thrum of affection he felt every time he was near the Commissioner. He smiled and continued a bit hoarser, "He's seen some of the worst, and the best and he's always loved this city. He spouts a ton of shit about morals and distinctions about right and wrong, and believes every word of it." The boot above him paused and then pressed down pointedly. John huffed, kids these days had no patience. And no clue. Years ago they would have broken out the Holy Water already. He let himself sink into the grate, much to their restrained confusion. Still they held onto that stubborn calm though, which irked him somewhat. He slides out of the wall and leans into it even as they point their silly guns in his direction. “Who are you?” The tall one asks, voice calm and deadly. John closes his eyes and smiles to better remember it. These two are not his, but they could be, they should have been. They’re just the right amount of broken. “How rude,” He opens his eyes with a smile he borrowed from someone in Arkham, “Trying to destroy me and not even know my name.” He slides back into the shadows and bricks and metal circling them and merely sticking his face out to continue, “Well, not exactly destroy, am I right? To cleanse.” He sneers the word and stops at their back, tutting over stacks of crates. “Look at you and your little base of operations. Setting up camp in my pipes and not even treating me to dinner first.” He tuts again, fighting the urge to smile as he sees the big one begin to figure it out. He can nearly see the words “Not Human.” Scroll across his eyes, clever as they are. The bearded soldier besides him betrays nothing, awaiting further orders and analyzing and compressing information for himself. These two were so adorable. “You speak for the city of Gotham then?” A conclusion reached, insane?likely; shaman? believable; magician? maybe. “Fool boy.” He emerges up from the ground in front of them, grasping their collars and pulling them down easily. “I am Gotham! I am its people and I am its buildings and I. Protect. My. Own.” He shakes them to punctuate that last bit, just to get it through their stupid faces. He can still feel the little jumps of their muscles as they try to jerk back, but his arms are stone and metal and tar. His breath is smog and perfumes and toxic waste. His rage is insane, is righteous, is old and familiar and stoneskinbone deep. They’re still scrabbling at him, hands trying to budge his shoulders and growing alarm in the creases of their eyes. ## He’d personally met the Joker once, and in the sunken painted eyes he saw a clear recognition. He’d cursteyed and giggled and pranced around him touching his hair and his cheeks and his arms. “Hello.” The clown had whispered tracing the line of his nose, fascinated. John in turn had  lightly touched the puckered smile and greasy green hair, familiarizing himself with his newest child. “Hello my son.” He’d whispered back, giving the man a smile that was all dirty alleys and blood and jagged skyscrapers ripping into the sky. The Joker collapsed into his hands, into his embrace and laughed long and ragged and free into his neck, leaving smears of white greasepaint behind. John thought it fitting. “I’m home!” He crowed and allowed himself to be led to Arkham to begin the tour of his new home. ## He leaves the Joker to settle in, checking up on his other rambunctious restless child. He strolls along the rooftops, and climbs down the fire escape fluidly until he ‘s a couple of yards above from where the aborted mugging is taking place. Batman leaves the would be criminal chained to a dumpster and glances up to where he is. Some of his children can’t see him; actually most of them. If he’s in a crowd he’ll only be remembered as a vauge twenty something. But they can all feel him, on a subconscious level. In someways, they see straight into his core, for when he’s alone they see only the wall of the building. He tries to hide inside his bones, leaving the bare basics out for when he feels like walking up to a cashier and paying for something. It breaks something inside of them if they see him fully. That thing was already broken in the Joker, and Bruce Wayne flutters between broken and cracked. “I found you a new playmate.” No response, but he does get a furrowed brow. “Just play nice boys, you know how it hurts me to see you fight.” He speaks into his comm, turning back to his motorcycle, “Alfred, do me a favor and scan the nightly news, anything big happening right now?” “None sir. May I ask why?” “I just had an odd feeling suddenly. Maybe I’m getting paranoid.” John lets himself fall off the fire escape and be swallowed up by the pavement, stepping out of the brick wall to fall into step with Batman. He hugs him one handedly and squeezes once, “Make me proud.” He stops and turns, eyes questioning before his radio pipes up again, “We’ve got a robbery on fourth and Grove sir.” “...Yes, on it.”

#TDK #john blake #batman #bane #Gotham!John #he's super chaotic neutral #my fanfic tag