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nonbinary-eddie-munson · 1 year

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Steve hadn't meant to evesdrop on eddies new band. Really, he was an innocent party here.

Once things had calmed down in the aftermath of Vecna, Steve and Eddie had scrounged up every penny they could -steve even sold his precious beemer so they could have the extra cash- and got the hell out of dodge. Eddie couldn't stay in a town where everyone still looked at him like he was a murderer and Steve loved Eddie too much to keep him trapped in a town that hated him.

They had settled into chicago nicely, far enough away from the hellmouth that was hawkins, indiana that they werent constantly jumping at the sight of their own shadows, but still close enough they could be back in less than a day if shit started going down again.

The metal scene in chicago was just starting to take off, and Eddie quickly fell in with a local band that was in need of a new lead guitar. Steve had yet to meet any of Eddies new band members, his work and class schedules keeping him entirely too busy and exhausted for socializing. All of which led to this moment, Steve hovering awkwardly at the end of the hallway leading backstage as Eddies new bandmates tore him apart.

"Seriously how'd a guy as hard core as Ed end up with a preppy little asshole like that, i mean did you see what he was wearing?" The drummer scoffed

Self-consciously Steve worried at the hem of his black polo, he had stressed over his outfit all evening before they headed out to the venue. Eddie assured him that he looked great telling him he looked "like a sexy little gothed up jock" in his black polo, his tightest jeans and just the barest hint of eyeliner and mascara to make his eyes pop

"I know it must have been slim pickings back in butt fuck nowhere but Ed's got options now. Sure, the guy has a nice ass, but Ed could pull someone who's not gonna ruin our cred by dating a guy who looks like a narc" the bassist added on meanly.

Swallowing past the lump in his throat Steve turned to head back to the bar when Eddies voice stopped him in his tracks.

"People who disrespect my boyfriend dont get to talk about his ass" came Eddies sharp reply "Steve is more metal than all of you dumb fucks combined, and he's the inspiration behind all of the lyrics that are making us so big in the scene right now. If you cant fucking respect my boyfriend, you sure as hell dont deserve to get famous off the songs i wrote about him so im fucking out and im taking my songs with me."

"Ed you cant be fucking serious" the drummer started

"No, fuck you guys! You act all high and mighty but your just as fuckin shallow and small minded as the dumb hicks Steve and I left Indiana to get away from. Good luck finding someone to replace me and my songs before the fest next month" Eddie spat, his footsteps thundering against the concrete floor and around the corner into the hallway, coming up short as soon as he spotted Steve frozen in the hallway shocked at Eddies fierce defence of him.

"Oh sweetheart" Eddie crooned bringing a hand up to cup the side of Steves face his thumb gently swiping away the tears Steve hadnt even realized had begun to fall "I'm sorry you had to hear that baby. Lets go home" Eddie took his hand back from Steves face, wrapping it around his waist and tucking Steve firmly against his side ushering a still dazed Steve down the hall, out of the bar and into the cool night air

"Your didnt have to do that Eds" Steve said quietly, reluctantly pulling away from Eddie now that they were out in the open where anybody could see.

"Of course i did baby. You're the love of my life. You matter more to me than anything else in this world. More than my guitar and metal and dnd. And certainly more than some mouth breathers who wouldnt know what metal is if it got up on stage and took a bite out of a demon bat" Eddie replied with a grin and a wink swooping down to press a quick peck against Steves mouth as he stood in the middle of the sidewalk frozen in shock at Eddies declaration

"Im more important to you than music and dnd?" Steve asked in a quiet awed voice, his heart beating rapidly as if it was trying to physically escape his chest and burrow itself into the flesh of Eddies own ribcage.

"Sure are sweetheart, now why dont you get that sexy ass of yours moving so we can get home and I can show you just how much I mean it" Eddie replied, his voice lowering into a deep gravel that drove Steve crazy, hands reaching out to pull Steve forward a few steps urging him in the directon of the van parked furthur down the street.

Steve stumbled after Eddie, letting the other man lead him, his brain still not fully back online after Eddies bold decleration of love.

Steve didn't believe in any god, but he found himself thanking every god he could think of for bringing Eddie Munson into his life.

#im sleep deprived and idk where this came from but here you go #anyways they definitely went home and fucked real nasty #and then Eddie went on to make a new better band and they all became best friends with Steve and then they got a record deal #and eddies old band could suck it #okay thats enough internet for me its time for bedtimes #steddie #steve harrington x eddie munson #steve x eddie

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puppysynonym · 11 months

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just watched across the spiderverse and I am sick over this man‼️‼️‼️

#the spot #atsv spot #spiderman atsv #across the spiderverse #HES!!! HOT!!!!!#NONE OF MY FRIENDS WOULD HEAR ME OUT ON THIS ONE BUT I FEEL IT IN MY BONES #GUYS HES HOT #NO ONE UNDERSTOOD ME IN REAL LIFE COME ON INTERNET YOU GET IT #*on hands and knees*#moth.txt #vomit mention

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turtledotjpeg · 2 years

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I don't know anything about the hunter x hunter mobage aside from the art I see people post on tumblr, but it seems like Melody isn't in any of the cute seasonal outfit card sets and it makes me sad

So I scribbled some of my own beach Melodys o/ I think she deserves a beach day

#hunter x hunter #hxh #senritsu #melody hxh #i love herrr i hope she gets off the boat alive somehow #where is my melody fanservice mobage art you cowards #...i say that and yet i'm probably the real coward here for not drawing her in a swimsuit #my only excuse is that there's no canon reference for her curse skin and i was too lazy to make something up #these were supposed to be 'quick doodles' but alas #spent 2 weeks on em and got this bizarre combination of totally halfassed in some parts and completely overworked in others #the second one in particular ended up pretty deepfried-looking at one point lol hopefully it's slightly less crunchy now #(i didn't realize until after i started this that there's actually a hermit crab beach card with paku)#(didn't mean to rip it off lol but it's too late melody gets hermit crab friends too)#...sorry for that absolute wall of tags haha #apparently it's a putting-all-my-idle-thoughts-on-the-internet day

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khruschevshoe · 23 days

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Everyone has been discussing whether or not the Shayne/Courtney wedding is real or fake and I would like to provide you a third option: the wedding was real and legal BUT ONLY for the return of Let's Do This. This is everyone's revenge on Arasha.

#for legal purposes this is a joke #but i do seriously want the return of let's do this so badly #i have literally no investment in the shayne/courtney ship #congrats if its real or if its fake #this was the funniest option for both the launch of a relationship or a prank #only way you can outshine arasha is lying to the ENTIRE INTERNET #rather than just your friends #smosh #shayne topp #courtney miller #shartney #shourtney

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bleaksqueak · 2 months

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"How do you stick with one project for so long without abandoning it" "How do you just sit down and work" "How do you make yourself keep working on a comic" "How do you draw and write when there's so many games to play instead--" The answer to these questions is always "I really don't think you understand the degree of hyperfixation I have for these characters." "But how do you keep the same hyperfixation?? Mine only lasts a month or two--" I was obsessed with a single manga from the time I was 15 years old until... Wait, still obsessed, but I think the last time I did fanart for it was two or three years ago now. (My friends know not to accidentally trip the wire and set off a gushing volcano of love on the topic of said manga. I will info dump with the fist of a very neurodivergent god.)

#I get asked these questions a lot #from friends or from peeps on the internet #and i'm over here like.... i could choose to be embarassed abt how obsessed I am with my own chars #but it's so much more fun to have zero shame #there's a real discussion to be had about “work ethic” when it comes to art work and creative work that would be a whole other can of worms #but that's a blather for another time

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kalakilo · 23 days

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cant believe i've seen so many people be like "its april fools day why do you guys believe this" when i truly do not see a reason they'd go SO fucking hard on it????????? they obviously hardlaunched on april fools just to fuck with people but my god WHY would they have the video filmed like two months ago of courtney saying "i'm getting fucking married" and to have ALL of the cast and crew go so hard on the comments like everything is pointing to it being real even the proposal picture and the hardlaunch CAKE like do some of you seriously think they did AAAAALLL this for a joke????? you think they colorgraded those pictures as a JOKE???????????

#seriously why are people so skeptical now #i just saw a post about how on april fools people will believe nothing but then go about their lives every single day #believing anything they see on the internet #there seems to be some pretty hard evidence that this is REAL #to be completely clear im not a shipper in the smosh fandom and i honestly believed they were just friends this is just insane to me lol #smosh #courtney miller #shayne topp

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simply-sithel · 2 months

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Two Katherine Addison short stories, bound as minis for @mythrilthread as part of a personal little trade. I received the copy of Tumblr stories in addition to a glow-in-the dark mini so I clearly made out like a bandit on this swap. Not to mention, @mythrilthread also bound my typeset for the @renegadepublishing Tiny Book Bang this summer 💅 I think you could officially call me a collector at this point....

And yes, I do believe those papers are from the @aetherseer gift pack. And that's a scrap of some Duo I nabbed during @renegadepublishing meetup.

#little book #bookbinding #book arts #thinking about internet friends #my people are real and they make amazing things #and they are nice and kind and generous

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dear-ao3 · 1 year

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ok so katyas partner needs a tumblr name send suggestions >:]

#time to be indoctrinated #not a tag #from saph #:)#also i refuse to type out katyas partner when i can type a real name #this is the part where we get a million asks being like #just use their real name!#or #wait these aren't your real names?#no they are not!#basic internet safety is good and sexy my friends

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trumpetnista · 10 months

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CMW2/Trumpetnista: Where I’ve Been and Where I’m Going

Hi, everyone! It's been a long time. I want to let you all know that I'm okay. I know that proof of me still being around has been here since I still do my weekly Wednesday posts and calendar posts. I also updated my Profile after I turned 30 (holy shit, I’m 30! I’ve been on here since 2010!) but I haven't posted like this in a very long time. I still love writing and that my stories haven't been abandoned despite what it looks like. Things in my life have changed significantly, which I’m finally ready to go into detail about for myself and for people who have been wondering what happened to me, if there are even people who were wondering to begin with. I hope so. This is a very long post so I’m gonna put a READ MORE after the lighthearted part so you guys don’t have to read a wall of pretty grim text. TLDR: despite many, many things that have changed in my life, I’ll be returning to writing on FFN, AO3 (when it gets fixed), and posting chapters/fics from there here very soon. I’m making this post to help me keep this promise. I’ll be updating stories, finishing stories, and writing new ones so if you’re interested, please stick around on here, follow me on FFN/AO3 (CMW2), and on Twitter (Trumpetnista) to stay up to date. Thanks for all the years of support and friendship. I love you all. Have a good one!

REASON FOR MY ABSENCE #1: In September 2022, I had a psychotic break and I was hospitalized for a week. At the time, I was drinking heavily and vaping cannabis to the point of addiction and lung damage. The vaping started as pain management for fibromyalgia but quickly snowballed into self medicating. During my time in the hospital, I was diagnosed with Bipolar 1 which is Bipolar with Mania, which explains so much. It explains a lot of my behavior as a child that I was shamed and punished for. It explains how I approach my relationships with my family and the few friends I have online and IRL. Most of all, it explains my way of approaching fandom. It explains a lot about where my previous energy came from when it came to producing content.

I was not only genuinely passionate about my fandoms and ships (which I still am!) but looking back on things, a lot of the time, I was in Mania and I didn't have the meds or the professional mental support I needed. I knew that I had depression and anxiety. I knew that I struggled and still struggle with suicide ideation. I knew that fibromyalgia had a negative effect on my mental health and cited that as the reason for my writing slowing down, which I explained in my previous MESSAGE FROM THE AUTHOR on my FFN profile, which I’ll be updating with this first part of this text post for my friends/readers on there but I didn’t know what was happening to me. I knew something wasn’t right in my head but I wrote it off as what I just listed above and as another effect of the grief I felt from losing one of my baby sisters from brain cancer in 2016. Fortunately, I already had a therapist and a psychiatrist so it was only a matter of finding the correct medications and adjusting my cognitive behavior therapy to deal with my condition.

I used writing as a way to vent about what I was frustrated about in fandom and in real life (which you probably already knew from my patented rambling Author’s Notes, LMAO!) and as escapism, which is good in moderation. I didn’t have any moderation so I stopped altogether. Now that my treatment is going well and I’ve learned to have middle gears instead going from 0 to 100, I want to return to writing. It’s still a coping mechanism for the chaos in my life but it’s no longer a crutch. Plus, I really want to finish/update some of my stories that haven’t been touched for years at this point. I also have new ideas for old fandoms that I’ve returned to, new fandoms, and ideas for impending content.

REASON #2 FOR MY ABSENCE: I have been in the process of deprogramming myself from being raised in a Cult. From the age of 8 to when the pandemic hit, I was part of the Jehovah's Witnesses. You'd never know it through my writing/tweeting or how I behaved when I was in my later years of schooling/with my fandom friends, which I'll get back to in a minute.

In my heart of hearts, I always knew that what I was learning and doing was wrong. For every thing that made sense, there were several things that didn’t. Plus, my social anxiety made the preaching work that JWs are known for downright unbearable to do to the point of me stopping except for the bare minimum. I didn't get solid proof that what I believed was wrong until my older sister and almost all of my younger siblings left in 2020. When I asked them why, I found out about the long time corruption in highest parts of the organization. There's greed, fraud, and large scale emotional manipulation through teachings, not from the Bible but teachings that came from propaganda. Typical Cult things. I was very upset but willing to learn more because like I said, deep down, I had a feeling that how I was living was wrong. What was my breaking point, what made me immediately leave without looking back, was finding out just how they feel about the safety of children from predators.

I watched To Catch a Predator Live when I was a child and ever since, I've had a zero tolerance for people who manipulate and abuse children for their own gratification. I have even less tolerance for those who cover for them instead of turning them in to the proper authorities. Naively, I thought that the sort of behavior that's been exposed in other religions/Cults wasn't a part of the Jehovah's Witnesses but I was wrong. I was very, very wrong. They indoctrinate those inside to forgive those who have done the heinous things because God demands it. For those outside, they just have really good PR in North America to keep their sickening ways mostly under wraps (which is thankfully changing to catch up with other regions) and a lot of those victimized by the Cult are shamed/threatened into silence whether they leave or not. Those who speak out after leaving are dismissed as nothing more than apostates.

It's not apostasy. It's The Truth, which ironically is what the witnesses call their teachings. People inside aren't rebelling and leaving just to cause trouble. It’s not “an attack on God’s People from Satan’s System of Things”. People are realizing that they've been manipulated and are escaping from a toxic environment, even when it costs them so many relationships, familial and social.

The only sibling that remains in the Cult is my autistic sister and I’m working on finding a way to get her out without destroying her mental health in the process. She is thoroughly indoctrinated and even in the face of all the evidence, I’m unsure if she’d actually listen. She may dismiss it all as apostasy and cut all of us off or she may become so devastated that her life would be in danger. She’s 24 years old and despite how our parents treat her, she’s not a baby nor is she stupid. She loves to do deep research on the things that interest her and the Cult is part of that. Eventually, she’ll stumble upon the information the rest of us have and she’ll have to make a decision. I’m hoping for the best but I’m prepared to get her through the worst. I’m not just her big sister, I’m her Caregiver and I will do my best to get her through when the time comes.

Another major thing that made me walk away from the JWs was the blatant homophobia. Even when I considered myself one of them, I never understood why they were so hateful and judgemental towards those who are part of The Alphabet. For as much they preached about showing love to all people, I didn't understand why they put such a big asterisk. I didn’t understand why. It didn’t make any sense. I hated hearing their views. I didn’t agree with them, even when I displayed ignorance, so I made a point not to behave like that in my interactions with LGBTQ+ individuals. I wanted to be a geuninely good person. I wanted to support my friends and family that trusted me enough to come out to me. I even said when they asked why I wasn’t cutting them off and I quote: “as many things that are wrong with me, I have no business judging anyone else.”

Plus, I myself am bisexual (and demisexual). I am. I am part of The Alphabet and I will no longer feel ashamed or embarassed about my identity. JWs are homophobic and it’s paired with purity culture so for years and years, I felt confused. I felt unnatural. I felt guilty. I felt like I had to hide who I was. I never want to feel that way again. Learning that the JWs were a Cult and just as corrupt as the other organized religions I wanted nothing to do with was my way out and my way Out.

I am free and even though it’s been difficult at times, I am so glad that I no longer have to pretend to be someone I’m not to please people who genuinely don’t give a shit about me. I’m being who I’ve always been online and in fandom from the age of 15. I’m being the person I was at school back in 2007-2011, who was the true me. A lot of Jehovah’s Witnesses kids give themselves the freedom to be themselves at school, which the Cult calls ‘living a double life’.

What’s made things easier for me in my deprogramming journey is that I’m not starting from scratch. I am so grateful for that. I’m grateful that I had people outside of the bubble I was in during junior high-high school to show me reality. I’m grateful that I had people to push me to do normal things like NHS and both sitdown and marching band. I’m grateful that I had people who accepted me for who I really was, even when I occaisonally felt guilty for my behavior. Ironically, the fictional worlds and fandom culture with attached friendships that I’ve been a part of this whole time prepared me for my current reality.

I still struggle with things like celebrating my birthday but I’m in a much better place than a lot of former JWs. I didn’t have any close friends in the Cult and the people in charge left me alone. I didn’t have a lot of responsibilities and I wasn’t held up as an example for people to follow. All I had to do was stop going to meetings and preaching (which was such a relief to let go of) before telling my immediate family, which was the only fear I had. I was afraid of losing them because the doctrine says that you’re supposed to cut off people who leave, even if they’re family. I already went into detail about my siblings and their relationship with the Jehovah’s Witnesses. Even though one of them is still involved, the bond between us all is stronger than the doctrine. I’m so happy to be able to say that. Not many people who leave can.

Now, let’s talk about my parents who have accepted the fact that most of us are Gone but I want to talk about them anyway because it factors into what’s going on with me.

Plus, as you’ve picked up by now, this post is both an announcement to friends/followers and the first of likely many journal entries. The majority of the journal entries are gonna be private with READ MOREs and DNIs so you can avoid them because they’re gonna be pretty grim 98% of the time.

My father has been a staunch believer for decades but recently, his health has taken a turn for the worse. In March 2023, he had complications from undiagnosed congestive heart failure. After being treated, he was transferred to a nursing home that neglected him to the point of him getting bedsores. One of the bedsores became a nasty open wound due to him being diabetic, leading to him needing a colostomy bag to prevent the wound from being infected further. He is currently bedbound and some of the procedures he’s gone through to save his life have gone directly against the JWs doctrines. Blood transfusions are against the doctrine but my mother has given him blood to save his life. Not to mention that very few people who claimed to be his friends have actually visited him in the facilities he’s been in. And those very few people have no idea about the blood transfusions because if they did, it’s likely that they’d heavily condemn him for accepting them. All he has at the end of the day is us.

Ideally, this situation would be a wake up call but my father is a narcissist. He’s never been able to admit when he’s wrong and there’s also the sunken cost fallacy. The JWs got into contact with him and my mother in the 80s and they’ve structured their whole lives around the doctrine. They gave him a family and a Community he lacked due to a bad childhood with a shitty mother in name only, no father, and a delinquent younger brother. They latched onto his vulnerability and gave him purpose. They also provided him with a steady source of people for him to be a narcissist with because for every person he’s alienated, inside and outside the Cult, there have been plenty of people to replace them. Accepting that the Witnesses are corrupt means admitting that he was wrong this whole time. It means that he’d have to accept that he as the Provider failed his wife and children in the worst way. It means that he’d have to be humble and get actual help for his years of trauma plus his narcissism. From what I’ve seen and heard over the years, it’s clear that he would rather die than do that. Maybe I’m wrong. I hope I’m wrong.

My mother’s situation is different. She is physically disabled and has been for years. She is diabetic and she is morbidly obese, as was my father before his recent illness. She’s been in a codependent relationship with my father for over 40 years and she is also a narcissist. It’s a hell of a combination. She’s basically followed my father’s lead this whole time while eventually alienating people, leaving her circle of friends to those within the Cult. I would have the same resignation for her that I have for my father, except for one major thing. Thanks to Ancestry. com, my older sister found her birth mother who had been looking for her for years. She’s gone from being an only child orphan to having a mother again and she now is the oldest of 5 siblings and counting. None of them have any connection to the Jehovah’s Witnesses and never have. They had normal lives with normal childhoods. Most of all, all of them are showing her unconditional love, which is something that she’s never experienced before. Not from her adoptive parents. Not from my father. Not from anyone.

My mother has not only been given a family outside the one she created with my father (and we all love her dearly. We really do, even with our ongoing frustrations with her...) but she has been given a way out of the Cult. She’s no longer isolated. Plus, Dad falling ill so quickly has forced her out of the bubble she’s been in since she stopped working back in 1999. She was told to stay home and raise us, which she honestly did not do. While Dad was at work, she shifted the day to day parenting responsibilities of the younger kids to myself and my older sister. Another thing that’s forcing her out of the bubble is all of us enforcing boundaries against her narcissism and learned helplessness.

We love her dearly but we are tired. Dad getting sick has shaken up all of our worlds. We emphasize with her but it’s come to a point where we can’t take much more, which is where her family comes in. Them being outside of the situation provides perspective that we haven’t been able to have. Through that perspective and the love that all of them are showing her, Mom is slowly (and I do mean slowly...) reaching out for professional help for her years of trauma. She has a therapist now and hopefully, that will lead to a psychiatrist that will give her proper medication because I am 98% sure that she is Bipolar as well. A lot of her behavior mirrors mine from before I was diagnosed and it had to come from somewhere.

In the process of getting professional help, through connecting with her biological family, and while dealing with what’s happened to Dad, I believe that she’s breaking away from the JWs. I honestly think that the only reason she’s stayed as long as she has is because she was following Dad’s lead. She may believe herself but since he’s been hospitalized, she has stopped going to the meetings. She’s stopped preaching and she’s been giving Dad blood, which again is directly against the JW’s doctrine. If she truly believed, she wouldn’t have done it. At least that’s the way I’m looking at things. I hope I’m right.

To wrap this post up and to give a TL:DR, I just want to say that my return to writing is a part of my healing journey. And my return to writing is for Me. I’m truly putting myself first for the first time in my life and part of putting myself first is giving myself permission to fully enjoy the things I love without guilt or hesitation. Thank you for reading.

#personal #LiveLoveWRITE #fandom blog #journal entry #trumpetnista #cmw2 #a return to writing is imminent #internet friends are real friends!#i HEART all of y'all!#family #deprogramming #ex jehovah's witness #mental illness #bipolar 1 #family dynamics #reunited family #healing from trauma

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thebest-medicine · 6 months

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eeeeeee I just met up with some cool ass tumblr peeps for lunch and a stroll!!! it was so fun 💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚

@clayticklish @toadallytickles

@yourlittlettoy thanks for swinging by on your way through my town!!! we must gather again soon you’re all so wonderful!

#I scream #people on the internet are Real and also Cool?????#yourlittlettoy #clayticklish #eeep #personal #ahhh #toadallytickles #I am now realizing that I need to meet people on here more regularly for my brain chemistry #brain go BRRRRR SAME SAME SAME BRRRRR FRIEND HELLO #tickle peeps are the best peeps #tickling #tfb community #tickle community #aghhhhhhhdhdhfjg still in disbelief when people meet me. I’m like WHOA YOURE YOU and they’re like YOURE YOU!!!#WERE USS!!!!!! ahhhh #the psychological horror and joy of being known #mine #I’m silly and forgot to take any pictures so I’ll wait for your postses

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mintmatcha · 6 months

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"every lesbian has a male exception" you sound like a conversion therapist

how come every straight girl is allowed a celebrity "girl crush" but I'm not allowed to joke about fucking a faceless manga author.

#All of my friends in real life #not on the internet #have their little celebrity crushes.#morgan wallen #superman #fucking tesla

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marypsue · 1 month

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If you're going to reblog my (admittedly very ADHD) post about, to borrow someone else's excellent summation, bees in the brain, to say 'OP check your medications', have you considered:

not doing that

#listen. you may think you're being helpful.#can you just. please. for five seconds. consider the words you say to other human beings. thank you.#anyway I block people who smugly diagnose me on that post because #it's not somehow fine and not rude as hell to tell someone they have a mental illness based on one paragraph they wrote #just because the mental illness is ~fun and ~relatable #you don't know me and you are DEFINITELY not medically trained keep your fucking opinions to yourself #(note: this does not go for 'this can be a symptom of ADHD'/'I experienced this and then I got diagnosed'/'OP have you looked into'#just the smug 'yeah it's the ADHD'#why don't you fuck off into the nearest pond with that)#(real alive people on the internet are not fictional characters for you to project onto and headcanon about)#(and we are not friends for me to take this as a fun jokey thing. you are a stranger. and you are being INEXPRESSIBLY rude.)

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lunarharp · 7 months

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lines from my first fic and queen lyrics

#witch hat tag #orufrey #making 'you're my best friend' about not-aziracrow feels wrong like that is literally theirs but the overlap of it all is real #this is the most i've drawn in one day since i returned to the internet..it's ok..i can still focus..i've still got it..i'm still nuts #i liked the last post.. i wanted that to be top of my blog for a bit longer..i seriously need to calm down

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danieandflars · 9 months

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What's terra ignota?

It's a science fiction series by Ada Palmer about a 25th century Earth which thinks itself a peaceful utopia, and its descent into chaos as the cracks in that utopia start to appear. It is somehow both deeply profound and the most bonkers, complicated thing to explain and I love it so much, it's my favourite series.

Features:

18th century larping

Magic 13 year old with Toy Story powers

The worst and most pathetic guy imaginable

Extremely serious discussions about religion, gender, freedom, peace, politics etc. etc.

Pokemon are real

It's definitely not for everyone and very stylistically weird, which some people are going to love and some are going to hate. I recommend taking the first chapter at face value, I find it a pretty accurate snapshot of how the story will feel to read, and if you're offput by it from the beginning, it's probably not going to get better for you.

But if you *like* that shit. :) get ready.

#terra ignota #I'm trying to be SO normal #I have a terra ignota side blog where I talk about this usually #i've tricked four people in real life and three people in internet life to read it #and subjected my friends to a VERY annoying powerpoint about it #is this a good advertisement? probably not

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minne-cerbinna · 10 months

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I think quite often of the optional little dialogue tree that one can get about Yaevinn in TW2 with an imported save if one sides with Iorveth, and particularly of just how Iorveth describes Yaevinn

The dialogue prompt "I once knew another Scoia'tael - Yaevinn." will lead to the following exchange:

GERALT: I once met another Scoia'tael leader.

IORVETH: Yaevinn. I knew him. He had beautiful dreams and desperately wanted me to share them. Asked the same of you, I heard.

GERALT: You know a lot about me.

IORVETH: I try to know as much as I can - about everyone.

They'll elaborate a little further in this dialogue about how they both agree with Yaevinn's reasons and the fact that Yaevinn "saw combat and killing as poetry" which Iorveth deems unrealistic because "war is prose, with no place for beauty" (how poetic).

But the interesting part to me is the statement that Yaevinn had "beautiful dreams" and how he was this grand idealist, because this seems to be in contradiction with Yaevinn's characterisation. In his novel appearance, he argues against Toruviel's idealism as he proposes shooting the unarmed messenger. In TW1, Geralt refers to him in his journal as being "disillusioned", as well as being "a cynic and a pragmatist", neither of which seem to hold with Iorveth's account. While this can be credited to the fact that it's possible that Iorveth's past-tense statement of "I knew him" means that he hasn't seen Yaevinn in some time rather than, or at least in addition to, the implied death. He has perhaps not seen him since the Second Northern War, where they were both in the Vrihedd brigade, and Yaevinn could have grown more cynical since the Scoia'tael were betrayed by Dol Blathanna, his earliest characterisation is that of the novel canon, and he does not present a particular idealism that would reflect the notion that he is a dreamer.

It can be taken as a choice of characterisation, because for all that Yaevinn is disillusioned, he does have his hopes and desires for the future and his plans at Vizima, just as Iorveth has his hopes for Saskia and Vergen. He has these dreams, even if he tenders them close to his chest and puts the practical aspects first before he allows himself to have this hope. And I think that is a really interesting interpretation, to have this juxtaposition, that he can be both disillusioned and a dreamer, and that he chose a scant few, Iorveth, and then Geralt, to share in those precious dreams.

The notion of Yaevinn having these "beautiful dreams" is also very pertinent to his TW1 characterisation, I think, because there are optional dialogues in which Yaevinn tells the accounts of how he once lived among humans and believed in assimilation, that the humans would accept the elves if given enough time, only to be persecuted and harassed at length until he finally accepted that there was no place for him there, that there could be no assimilation, only annihilation. And even though he knows it is a hopeless fight, he still proceeds onward. He knows his people are dying, and he knows that if they do not act quickly, they will be well and truly doomed to extinction, but he is still trying to fight. That is, in and of itself, an expression of a dream for a better future, even if he thinks it hopeless, or, as Iorveth criticises, unrealistic.

Serious character analysis aside, I think that the absolute funniest interpretation of this dialogue is that it is not to be taken literally about Yaevinn's idealism or lack thereof, but rather as a euphemism -- taking "beautiful dreams" as a euphemism for queer romantic interest; hence "he had beautiful dreams and desperately wanted me to share them" is something like "he likes men and asked me to be his lover", "I hear he asked the same of you" thenceforth meaning something like "were you also his lover/do you also like men" (and the response "you know a lot about me" therefore indicating that he is correct in his judgement). There's like a whole rebellion going on but Iorveth is just checking out his options, y'know.

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