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#incorrect tw quotes
Derek: Does everyone understand the plan?
Cora: Uh ya but I have one quick question. So, you've explained plans A and B but, since plan A never works and plan B usually goes to shit, what are plans C through, I don’t know, F?
Stiles: I'm so glad you asked. Plan C is when I yell 'pizza's here' which is your sign to hit the deck so Allison and Chris can shoot anyone standing. Plan D is Lydia going full banshee scream on their asses. Plan E is some spontaneous magic by yours truly and Plan F is to just mountain ash trap everyone in and hopes for the best.
Derek: There’s plans C through F?
Stiles: And Plan G but that involves some coffins, a nice plot at the cemetery, and a very heartfelt rendition of the Independence Day speech from Coach Finstock.
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incorrectsterekquotes · 4 months
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Stiles: I wouldn’t wish this upon my worst enemy
Stiles: unless of course, we are talking about my worst enemy, Theo Raeken. Fuck you, Theo Raeken, you know what you did.
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7thleveldown · 9 months
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Incorrect Quotes II
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Stiles: I’m glad I didn’t send any drunk texts last night.
Derek: You did.
Stiles: What?
Derek: You sent me a text that said “If you ever want your dick sucked, I’d gladly volunteer.”
Stiles: Oh, that wasn’t a drunk text.
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fandomidiot · 2 years
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Scott: would you like to be in our diverse Hocus Pocus?
Liam: sure?
Scott: perfect. U straight?
Liam: no. Bi
Scott: great!
~The Pack Group Chat~
Scott: we have acquired a bisexual witch
Isaac: babe there are at least 10 active bisexuals in this group chat
Stiles: "active"? Tf does that imply? Resting bisexuals???
Lydia: passive bisexuals obviously
Allison: guys it's clearly dormant bisexuals
Derek: only the avatar, master of all 4 bisexuals...
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maliagf · 2 years
Conversation
Stiles: [staring at Scott]
Lydia: Your gay is showing.
Stiles: Bi, actually.
Lydia: Well if you don't act on your feelings you'll be all bi-yourself.
Stiles:
Stiles, googling: How do you divorce a friend?
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loverboylife · 2 years
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Top 5 Flirty Pickup lines
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Pick up lines are so common in the dating world that not having one could mean the difference between walking home with a woman and seeing someone else whisk her from beneath your feet. But don't worry, we've compiled a list of the most effective pickup lines available. Let's have a look at what we have to offer without further ado.
1. Hey, you’re pretty and I’m cute. Together we’d be Pretty Cute
2. Know what’s on the menu? Me-N-U.
3. They say Disneyland is the happiest place on earth. Well apparently, no one has ever been standing next to you.
4. Did I tell you I’m writing a book? It’s a phone book and it’s missing your number.
5. If I could rearrange the alphabet, I’d put U and I together.
*Free $750 PayPal Gift Card*
#sterek#sterek au#sterek incorrect quotes#incorrect tw quotes#teen wolf incorrect quotes#incorrect teen wolf#incorrect sterek quotes#incorrect sterek#stiles stilinski#derek hale#eli hale
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incorrectbatfam · 6 months
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[at Jason's funeral]
Dick: *places his hand on the headstone and sobs*
Dick: How could you do this to me? We are so understaffed.
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a-bit-dapper · 3 months
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incorrect textposts: miscellaneous edition
the first batch
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wondersinwaynemanor · 3 months
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Red Hood and Red Robin greeting each other seriously during patrol so that RR can give the coordinates of a homeless child somewhere in Crime Alley. as if they weren't talking about explosives the other night and Jason didn't teach Tim to bake the coffee cupcakes he loves so much.
Later in a few
Red Hood, crushes the bags of stimulants on his hand and throws them on the sewers: Get a fucking new hobby. These things are disgusting.
Goon, runs: Fuck you, Hood!
Red Hood, sighs: What an idiot- The fuck. Where's my other gu-
Red Hood sighs again.
Red Hood, speaks to the rest of the family through the comms before chasing the goon: The kid's got my weapon again.
Nightwing: Robin, what -
Robin: Negative. It's not me.
Batman, pinches the bridge of his nose as he sits on a gargoyle somewhere in Gotham and thinks, "Here we go again."
Somewhere at a rooftop in Metropolis
Kon: Um Tim, I know you have plans of destruction, but-
Tim puts the weapon at the back of his suit. and Kon wonders how do the Bats even have places for weapons on their suits?
Tim: Nah, this is a comeback for him stealing one of the cupcakes you like at my apartment.
Kon: I already told you I'm over it!
Red Hood, hears the conversation through the comms and screams: Like the boy said, he's over it! Give that back to me!
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mossfeathers · 5 months
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we're so back (part 2 electric boogaloo) [1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13]
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lioneliness-etc · 1 year
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Jason: I was just sparring with Tim. Is it just me or is he actually starting to bulk up finally?
Dick: awww baby bird is getting all grown up!
Jason: huh now that I think about it… its been since he started dating Bernard.
Dick: awwwww he’s taking such good care of our Tim!
Tim meanwhile: please help me. Bernard is a chef. He cooks so much food. He’s such a nerd about cooking and I have to eat it all because I love him. He packed me an entire cooler for lunch. What am I supposed to do with all of this??
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incorrectsterekquotes · 4 months
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stiles: As usual, stiles has to save the day! derek: As usual, derek has to hear about it.
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7thleveldown · 9 months
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Incorrect Quotes VI
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Lydia: Stiles?
Stiles: Yeah?
Lydia: Why are you handcuffed to the radiator?
Stiles: I threatened to kill someone, so Derek cuffed me to the radiator to stop me.
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fandomidiot · 2 years
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Theo: wanna play Murder, Manipulate, Haunt From Beyond The Grave?
Liam:
Theo: it's like Kiss, Marry, Kill but--
Liam: theo
Theo: yes?
Liam: how did you get in my house?
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