[Eren, Armin & Mikasa, circa 845]
Eren: Tell him off, Armin! Assert yourself!
Armin: T-that's my bread!
Mikasa: Great, now let them have it.
Armin: You can have it!
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Zeke: OMG OMG OMG!
Eren: What?
Zeke: Hange ask me to date!!
Eren: WHAT! When!?
Zeke: Right now!!! She asked me out on February 30!!!
Eren: ... Oh, bro
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kidnapper: so i have your kid
levi, quietly readying his weapons: which one? i have like seven
kidnapper: the loud, annoying one who won't shut up
levi, sighing: again, which one? that description fits... wait, do you have my kid or do you have my wife??
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*arguing*
Hanji: *takes off glasses* I don't want to see you right now
Levi: ??
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Armin: I’m kind of crushing on someone, but I’m worried about telling you who it is, because you’re not going to like it
Eren: Just rip the bandage off.
Armin: It’s Jean.
Eren: Put the bandage back on.
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Incorrect AOT quotes
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Armin: Yeah, I'm super into murder mysteries and true crime!
Eren, flirting: You know, I've been suspected for a few murders myself 😏
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Jean: You're ugly when you lie, Eren.
Eren: I'm not lying!
Jean: THEN WHY ARE YOU UGLY
reference: zim
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Levi, teaching Mikasa to drive: Okay, you're driving and Jean and Eren walk into the road. Quick, what do you hit?
Mikasa: Oh, definitely Jean. I could never hurt Eren.
Levi, massaging his temples: The brakes. You hit the brakes.
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hange: if i died, how much would you miss me?
levi: it's cute that you think death can get you out of this relationship
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Armin: You know, when I said 'bring me back something from the coast' I meant like a seashell or something.
Eren, struggling to hold onto a seagull: Well how was I suppose to know??
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Sasha: Why do you look like that?
Jean, laying face-first on the floor: Like what?
Sasha: Like you’re dead.
Jean: It’s because I’m dying. Leave me here to perish.
Connie: Jean accidentally called Marco “babe” in front of everyone today.
Jean: *sobs into the floor*
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