#incorrect room of swords

[kinokkotsu]

Satisfied — Yuuta Okkotsu x Reader

々 Today’s Music Recommendation: Dark Red By Steve Lacy

A/N: im waiting for Mappa to finally give the jjk fan service to Yuta girlies.

You have accepted the fact that Yuta has nothing for you.

He is such a sweet and innocent soul with a dedicated heart. You should accept the fact that he truly wants to focus on what he is doing right now or otherwise you’d be the bad person.

Your brain tells you — you’re selfish because your heart just wouldn’t stop the way you look at him so dearly nor stop the way you touch him so tenderly despite the fact that he is only second to Gojo Satoru. Besides he has vowed how his heart only belongs to Rika.

Somewhere along that sentence has shuttered your heart once.

You and him were close, extremely. Extremely to the point where you both easily sleep in each other’s room without breaking a guilt, no nasty or sexual behavior from that. Just as close friends.

Yuta only has you if Maki, Toge or Panda were away for a mission. You are always there to embrace his coldness and bare with it everytime he needs you. You study as a Jujutsu Medical Student to treat physical wounds of your patients but Yuta seems to believe you also have the ability to plaster his scars within his sensitive heart.

You enjoy the thing you have with him. Love doesn’t have to be this and that. You are satisfied with whatever you are sacrificing for him. You hope this would last forever but you know life doesn’t always go as planned.

Higher ranks have decided to send him overseas, and you don’t like where this has headed.

“that meeting was draining for sakes..,” Sighs Yuta who plots down on the bed, next to your warm body, after he has stood his sword against the wall.

Yuta groans in exhaustion while he stretches his legs like a child. He always acts like a kid every time he is back from those old people, though it would lying if you admit you hate him whining over tiny problems.

“You shouldn’t have gone there if you already figured what it is going to be about,” you state, feeling Yuta lean into the crook of your neck while embracing your body.

He nods in your neck before sighing and holding you closer. “I just thought I needed to,” he says.

Silence fills up the room as you both kept quiet for a long time. No one is really in the mood to talk apparently, with all these missions and all these patients dragging the two of you down. The physical touch is the only way to express the burden you both are having.

The crickets in the background rhyme each seconds, entertaining the night as it goes on. The hoots of the owls alarmed how the night has been late for the humans to not fall asleep but neither of you couldn’t seem to close your eyes from exhaustion.

“..i must have to wait such a long time for you to come back,” you start the conversation, pushing your head back as you stare at the ceiling blankly.

He nods, again. Not wanting to spit a word nor waste his leftover energy comforting you.

Yuta has never felt so guilty doing this with you. Lately he could feel himself getting nervous and worried whenever you come to meet him even especially if you are busy. In fact he has been craving your touch then he has ever had in the past, knowing he must leave you soon.

Rika might be his first love but he is convinced he has fallen in love once again. This time with you.

The way you touch him so tenderly as if he was as fragile as glass, The way you look at him so dearly that he could melt right in that place, everything you behave around him get him smiling like an immature child.

He knows how he is hurting you like this, how it must have been draining you to accept the fact that he feels nothing towards you when in reality it is all incorrect.

That is when Yuta back his face away from your neck and look at you, staring as your eyelids seem like they are about to shut down anytime soon. He stares as he continues detecting every inch of your face that is illuminated by the moonlight.

A countdown goes on his mind for a good while till your eyes completely close.

“take care..of yourself, silly” he whispers while he brushed the dark circles under your eyes. You have fallen asleep already and he knows it. You are a heavy sleeper, and that is one fact about you that he thinks is cute.

Jujutsu Sorcerers are not ones to be fortunate when falling in love. He knows if he did, one of their lives could end tragically due to how cruel the world can be. Keeping the problem folded is better than unfolding the problem before it leaves you miserable for life. He knows you are in love with him and he shamelessly admits he is a coward for letting himself avoid these problems.

The energy that remains in his body is about to run out yet he could not stop stealing glimpses of you.

He lets out one last sigh for the day before he gives a quick peck on your cheeks and smiles. He quickly pushes himself to the top as he embraces your head in his arms. Glancing over the top of your head before letting himself join the night with you.

Staying in the presence with you like this keeps him satisfied even if everything around him has turned into dust.

Just you and him against this ruthless world.

Reblogs and comments are really appreciated xoxo

#yuta okkotsu x you #yuta okkotsu x reader #yuta x y/n #yuta x you #jjk yuta #yuta okkotsu #yuta x reader #yuta icons #yuta #okkotsu x reader #yuuta okkotsu #okkotsu yuuta #yuuta okkotsu smut #jjk okkotsu #yuuta okkotsu x reader #jujutsu okkotsu #jujutsu kaisen okkotsu #yuuta okkotsu x you #yuuta okkotsu fluff #jujutsu kaisen #jjk #jujustu kaisen #jjk season 2 #jjk x reader #jjk x you #jjk smut #jjk fluff #yuta fluff #yuuta fluff #kinokkotsu works、！

[lemonandlime22]

Randomly generated incorrect quotes pt 40 Obey me! (a few changed) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Diavolo: Yesterday, I overheard Mammon saying “Are you sure this is a good idea?” and Mc replying “Trust me,” and I have never moved from one room to another so quickly in my life.

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Thirteen: The next time I open up to someone, it'll be my autopsy.

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Mc: Do you want some tea? Solomon: What are the options? Mc: Yes or no.

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Satan: I wish I could control wasps and bees to sting my enemies. Asmo: You’re too young to have enemies. Satan: You don’t even know.

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*Squad is playing Among Us* Levi: I believe Mephisto is innocent, I was with them the whole time. Beel, what were you doing? Beel: Oh, I was just murdering… I mean, nothing!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Diavolo: How would you guys deal with a toxic friend? Barbatos: Tell them how you really feel. Satan: Slowly distance yourself from them. Levi: Engage in a 1v1 sword battle and if they lose they have to stop being toxic or pay the price. Diavolo, being handed a sword: …well heck.

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Mammon: Reverse tooth fairy where you leave money under your pillow and the tooth fairy comes and leaves you a bunch of teeth. Solomon: Why? Mammon, shaking a bag of teeth: Just because.

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#obey me #obey me incorrect quotes #obey me satan #obey me mammon #obey me diavolo #obey me barbatos #obey me solomon #obey me thirteen #obey me levi #obey me beel #obey me asmo #obey me mc #obey me memes #obey me crack #obey me boys #randomly generated incorrect quotes #obey me shall we date

[five-flavor-soup]

This is technically in response/as an addition to a post on the supposed ‘double standard’ in the fandom between Zuko and Jet as Katara’s love interests, but it’s been so long since it was posted and I figured the OP would be entirely uninterested in my word vomit, especially after like one and half years—so, separate post. I added a link for those interested. There's a cut because this got quite long lmao.

In short, the post supposes the argument that though Jet would’ve made Katara kill people (something Zuko very much Did Not Do, no matter what you think about The Southern Raiders), he cleaned up his act after this. Zuko, on the other hand, did lots of Really Bad Things to Katara & Co. with far more frequency than Jet did and got redeemed after a multitude of episodes doing Various Things Moste Evile. To then slap Jet with The Toxic Ex-label and see Zuko as the ‘healthier’ and ‘better’ option creates a Double Standard(™) within the fandom, which is supposedly bad and not an arguably incorrect reading. 

But the differences in fandom perception between Jet and Zuko as Love Interests for Katara (one of which canonically, and the other potentially and apparently talked about in the writer’s room) are easily explained, as can the Supposed Double Standard—just by thinking about it from Katara’s viewpoint, or even the audience’s. Because, well, the worst things Jet ‘almost’ ended up doing didn’t happen because of outside interference only. 

That’s the important bit here. He 100% would’ve drowned an entire village just to get rid of a handful of Fire Nation soldiers, had Sokka not managed to evacuate everybody. He 100% would’ve grievously injured two people who, as far as Jet and everybody else were aware, were refugees who might not even be firebenders — considering nobody else saw Iroh heat up his tea, he could’ve been wrong — in an attempt to prove his own hunch. Had the guards not been there, had Zuko not been able to fight back with swords, Jet would’ve genuinely attempted to wound them for as much as a puff of smoke. And Jet consistently involves bystanders (innocent or not) in his desperate quest to harm and defeat the Fire Nation: the Gaang (and particularly Katara, through explicitly manipulative means) and the villagers in Jet; Zuko, Iroh, and the people in the teashop in City of Walls and Secrets. Additionally, we don’t see more violence from him because he’s not a main character like Zuko is—though it’s implied that Jet beats up villagers who are supposedly in cahoots with the Fire Nation often, only agreeing to turn over a new leaf when he, Smellerbee, and Longshot decide to move to Ba Sing Se. 

Zuko explicitly and frequently doesn’t harm people: that, or it isn’t important to the plot. He doesn’t burn down the village on Kyoshi, he literally only manages to lightly singe it. He threatens people with violence frequently but never actually goes in for the kill. I’d argue that the most explicitly violent thing he does in Book 1 is breaking Aang out of the Pouhai Stronghold—for his own ends obviously, but if it’s spelled like treason and sounds like treason, it’s probably treason. When he thinks of robbing the pregnant couple while he’s on the run, he stops himself of his own volition; when he considers using Appa to catch Aang (this was a point made against Zuko in the post), he’s unaware of what Appa’s been through prior to that point and sees him as no more than an animal used for travel, much like the ostrich horse he stole earlier in the season. 

Zuko’s schtick throughout Book 1 and 2 is that he doesn’t want to think of the consequences of his actions. His plans are never fully complete. He doesn’t think of how he’s going to get a chained, notoriously slippery little eel of an Avatar to the Fire Nation, and he doesn’t think about what would happen to twelve-year-old Aang after they got there—which is horrible of him, but it also shows an odd, ignorant kind of innocence that you’d associate with a kid who’s got a hard time telling right from wrong. Like, I love Zuko dearly, adore him even, but kiddo doesn’t think ahead until the Book 2 finale and even that’s debatable. He’ll eventually start thinking ahead a little bit but for the most part, he doesn’t. Not saying that takes away responsibility, because it absolutely doesn’t, but it is telling of Zuko’s character: he’s an ‘act first, think later’-kind of guy, all ‘fuck around; find out; maybe success’. His sole goal throughout Book 1 and 2 is going home, without even thinking on how to get there beyond like, Avatar in my custody => back in Fire Nation with Avatar => dad loves me again. And he says that his only intention is to go home too, in Ep 2 of Book 1:

Aang: If I go with you, [He holds his staff in front of him as an offer, making sure Zuko understands that he does not wish to continue fighting.] will you promise to leave everyone alone? [The camera cuts to a side-view of the area, Zuko's men still surrounding him, spears poised. After a brief moment of hesitation, Zuko erects himself and nods in agreement. Aang is apprehended by Zuko's men, who take his staff . . . ] Zuko: [Boarding the ship up the walkway. Determined.] Head a course for the Fire Nation. I'm going home.

(Added emphasis for my point)

Zuko is not the Big Bad. He’s not The Largest Threat. He never is. In Book 1 it’s Zhao, in Book 2 it’s Azula, and in Book 3 it’s Ozai. Zuko is a consistent threat, yes, but not a particularly large one no matter how good of a fighter he is. Because he’s presented to us as a disastrously hurt and traumatised little brat who we, the audience, are supposed to feel sorry for, and slowly grow fond of. Because we learn in The Storm that the notion of “caring for others is weak” has literally been branded into him. Because he keeps getting back up to fight, but consistently holds back. We are shown that he knows, on some level, that what he’s doing is wrong: the text suggests that Zuko is actively suppressing his morals. And by the time Zuko hires an assassin to ensure the Avatar is dead, we know that Zuko is incredibly unhappy with his choice(s) and is desperate to be safe; that he’s uncomfortable but wants to be comfortable; that he’s incorrect about the source of his fear while he’s back in the palace. The audience is shown this explicitly. 

By contrast, we’re shown that Jet is fully aware that those villagers will die. He’s fully aware that, if he manages to prove the two refugees are firebenders, they’ll be arrested and probably mutilated (if the hand-crushing is any indication). I love Jet and his character, but he’s supposed to be the example of poisoning yourself with your hatred, anger, and hurt. He’s revenge that goes too far, because he doesn’t allow himself closure. He knows the consequences and isn’t shown to care for them, as long as his goal is furthered.

And there is the small, but significant, difference between the two characters: Zuko initially just wants to capture the Avatar, is purposefully remaining unaware of what will happen when he does so, and is clearly shown to change, while Jet just wants to punish firebenders and is very aware of what will be necessary for him to do so, with a handful of lines of how he ‘stopped being like that’. And honestly, Jet is far more mature than Zuko is for quite some time, regarding the violence of war—basically as mature as Zuko eventually becomes at the tail-end of his redemption arc. But Zuko’s maturity is at that point healthier, because he doesn’t want to genuinely do harm. 

In regards to their separate relationships with Katara, there’s these fantastic points that @sokkastyles made in reply to the post:

The fact that Zuko actually did change and Katara actually forgave him makes ALL the difference. [ . . . ] The thing about Jet is how manipulative he was with Katara. He not only almost made her kill innocents, but he lied to her about the man he attacked having a knife when he was called out, so that Katara would see her as righteous. Someone who is willing to lie in order to make themselves seem good and someone who says they are going to change but then does the same things doesn’t have a good track record, and that’s a more troubling relationship dynamic than someone who acts as an upfront enemy but then sincerely changes.

And: 

I do think it makes sense to focus on manipulation being worse than being a cartoon villain when we're talking about personal relationships. I think many people can relate to having someone like Jet in their lives who seems nice but who lies and manipulates to justify their own bad behavior despite repeatedly claiming that they will change. Not that many people will experience being tied to a tree by someone who wants you to tell them where the Avatar is, and it is completely reasonable for people to be more forgivable of things Zuko did as a villain than things Jet did to Katara when he claimed to be a friend.

I actually don’t have anything to add to this, lol. It’s succinct and well-worded.

Lastly, in addition the relatability and the relationships being different (the manipulative, emotionally hurt, and self-proclaimed anti-hero versus the initially childish, explicitly confused and desperate cartoon villain, plus the girl they hurt horribly), there’s also the problem of Jet not being a main character. Jet is a relatively well-written side character, whilst Zuko is very quickly established as a main-ish character with his own POV (as the writers decided during the conceptualisation that he’d be joining Team Avatar eventually). Zuko’s troubling, self-destructive nature that has been forced upon him and his Tragic Childhood is shown in high definition. The audience is supposed to eventually be okay with Zuko and hopefully like him, slowly adding puzzle pieces to complete the picture of a horrific earlier youth and treatment by nearly everybody he knows except Iroh. Something like this isn’t necessary with Jet, not just because he was already incredibly likeable and understandable from his introduction and onwards, but also because he’s neither a villain nor a main character. 

There’s multiple reasons as to why Zuko is often seen as the ‘better’ option, just like there are multiple reasons why Jet and Zuko are compared so frequently—they’re both traumatised teenage boys who ‘rebel’ to get some semblance of control back, but we see Zuko change into a kid anyone would be a little bit proud and fond of and that doesn’t happen with Jet. Double standard or not, Zuko and Jet are different characters who the writers also treated very differently, on purpose. It makes sense to me that the audience would think Zutara is the ‘less bad’ or far better option. We know far more about Zuko than we know about Jet; and Jet’s redemption arc, if we can even call it that, halts permanently when Zuko’s is reaching the height it for him to go into a freefall, ultimately culminating in a genuine redemption. We, the audience, know this. So does Katara.

#atla meta #zutara meta #not tagging this j*t*ra bc its a bit negative and i do not want to infringe on anyone's tag lmao #but i will tag it #jetara critical #just to be safe #jet atla #prince zuko #katara #zutara #the thing about both these ships is that katara can be put down as making an active choice in the narrative #though it wants to punish her for it #she is Wrong. he is Bad Guy. here's Better Guy go have babies #regardless. i feel like post-redemption zuko would be easier for her to choose--because she saw the proof of his change

[dontfearrr]

ask and you shall receive! @elia-the-bibliophile

i have a few warnings, i’m coming out of fan fiction retirement so bare with me. i didn’t proofread that well so don’t mind any spelling mistakes, i used some shitty sindarin translator on google so i do apologize if it’s incorrect, and. i think that’s all! :)

In my arms

gif not mine!

Summary: Thranduil isn’t very fond of you and legolas’s relationship but nonetheless he bares it.

Pairing: Thranduil x reader

Warnings: small hint toward sex (nothing specific)

Word count: idk tbh i forgot to check

Category: hurt/comfort(?)

—————————

“final count, forty-two.” Legolas spoke matter-a-factly across from you as he ran his fingers over his perfectly crafted, elvish bow. You gave him a raised eyebrow and drew your sword in a blink of an eye, plunging it into an orc that had its axe raised behind Legolas’s back.

“forty four”

—————————

It was midday in middle earth, you and Legolas had volunteered to clear the rogue orcs that ravaged near by villages, burning and spilling blood mercilessly. It wasn’t often you got to spend time with him due to your other duties in Mirkwood.

The Woodland Realm had been your home for many ages, you were an elf but a fool in their eyes. Woodland elves aren’t the wisest of the bunch but nonetheless, they’re your home. Legolas was the closest you’d ever get to a brother, he cared for you as family.

However that could never sit right with Thranduil.

He was a stubborn man, possessive some may say, which is why you and Legolas’s little adventure wasn’t mentioned to the elven king. Maybe it wasn’t the smartest choice considering he will find out eventually, he had men everywhere you look. At the end of the day, you’re accompanied by one of the most skilled princlings you’ve ever came across, so what could justify Thranduils brooding this time?

You and Legolas were on your way back to your residence, small talk was made but you both enjoyed simply just each others company, even if it was in silence.

“and what do you suppose daddy dearest will have to say once we return?” you inquired, not looking up from the ground as the both of them walked walked. “something along the lines of ‘no one leaves here without my knowledge, i’ve told you many times legolas’ then send me off as if i’m some child” He mocked his father, which earned a small smile in amusement from you.

As you entered the throne room, you and Legolas stood near the doors for a moment, exchanging farewells for the day. He embraces you in a warm comforting hug as he always did before he let you be, smoothing down the back of your hair and nodding his head before exiting to mind his duties. You took a deep breath to prepare yourself for what was to come as you walked down the long stone walk way to the throne, which sat the most beautiful man you’ve ever laid eyes upon. He sat nearly diagonal, legs crossed with his arms on either side of the throne. Glittery gems littered his fingers and crown that complimented his usual flawless elven apparel.

His long white hair shifted with his gaze as he spotted the smaller elf before him. He gave her no expression which was expected. He stared, waiting for you to speak, you could feel his mood from where you stood, it reeked of attitude.

Thranduil had spotted the interaction between you and legolas, it burned a fire of rage inside of him, only he was allowed to lay even a finger upon the elf. She belonged to him. His mind raced with thought but never cracked even a sliver of visible emotion.

“my lord” you began to bow before him until he raised a hand, putting a halt to your actions. You stood back up straight in confusion and shifted on your feet, Thranduils eyes staggering into you.

He finally spoke. “i don’t think i remember warranting your leave.”

You stood your ground, after all, the king would do anything for this she-elf.

“orcs were bringing treachery over near by villages, surely you saw the fires, my lord.”

You dipped your toe into the water, testing him.

His eyes narrowed at you, his thick dark eyebrows coming together, he was unimpressed. “and what does that have to do with me?”

“nothing, my lord. Me and Legolas simply volunteered.” you took no more than five steps closer toward the tall man. “we both had a free morning, i see not the problem.” Thranduil uncrossed his legs slowly, rising from his seat. His garments fell into place, the long white, detailed over coat trailed behind him as he made his way down the wooden steps. You were eyeing him like the finest piece of treasure, his grace and royalty always intimidated you.

“very well. however, i see no reason why my son had to accompany you.” he challenged, standing only a few feet from you, hands intertwined at his front.

“i mean not to disrespect you, my lord, but i don’t see a problem with the company of your son. would you have had me go alone? perhaps getting killed?” you know he would react to that, and he did. A long sigh drew from his nostrils, getting quite impatient despite having lived for more than 8,000 years.

“Thranduil, it is to you.” he steps even closer to you and peers down at you like an animal hunting prey. “you two seem.. close.” he followed up, taking the knuckle of his index finger to push a strand of misplaced hair behind your ear. “yes. he’s the only one who will even speak to me in this realm, other than you.” you finally raised your head up to meet his piercing blue eyes. “he is the only one who treats me like family. a brother.” you continued to further solidify your point.

This wasn’t the first time you’ve had a conversation like this with Thranduil. He’s a curious yet jealous mess, whether he likes to admit it or not. This conversation was slowly taking a toll on his heart, nasty remarks threatened his throat and boiling tears threatened his eyes. He remained calm, the elf in front of him reminding him of his purpose.

“he touched you.” Thranduil simply said while tilting his head to the side a bit. If this was his attempt at intimidating you, it sure as hell was working. He made something in your heart weak, yearning for him. “surely you aren’t jealous of your very own son, right?” your tone changed, attempting to take the upper hand in this situation, and based on his expression, it was working. your crossed your arms behind your back and gave him your best doe eyes.

“i mean not to make you feel this way, you know Legolas doesn’t think of me that way, and nor do i.”

Thranduils hand fell from your cheek down to your waist, gripping fairly tight as if you were going to disappear. “i know my son shall never dare to try my woman, but you are special and you know that. it wouldn’t take a lot for him to change his mind.” At this point you were bored of the conversation, you only ever had eyes for Thranduil, but that is hard for him to understand. He’s not used to this kind of love and anything that happens under his nose makes him rethink every single thing that has ever come to him. you were his star.

“oh meleth nin” Your heart ached for the king in front of you. He has seen many a heartbreak. He couldn’t bare to handle another. You were much younger than the elven king, but you knew when his heart was hurting, and you were going to fix that. Both of your hands raised to his face, his skin was like porcelain, flawless and pale. Your thumbs ran over his cheekbones, he instinctively leaned into your touch, his eyes fluttering shut. He may seem intimidating, but sometimes even the most wretched need comfort and reassurance.

“Legolas is no more than a brother to me. you need not worry. I pledged my heart to you a long time ago Thranduil and that is how it will stay.” you got as close as you could to him to where you could still reach him. Your hands never left his face and his arms came to wrap around your waist completely. “Im nifred i er aur im lothron ú- n- farn an cin.”(i fear that one day i may not be enough for you) He whispered just loud enough for you to hear. Your heart shattered at the broken man. You wished you could take all of his trouble for yourself so he’d never have to bare them again. His head fell to your shoulder, nuzzling his face into your neck. You’d never seen him so vulnerable before. You held the back of his head, gently smoothing over his hair and scratching his scalp.

“meleth nin, my heart and soul belongs to you. there’s nothing in this earth that could give me the love you do.” You whispered into his ear, kissing the pointy tips and they flushed red. You felt his body shudder at the action and held him closer. “don’t let a simple adventure spoil your mind.”

you lifted his head to face you and leaned yours against his. “im mel cin”(i love you).

Thranduil sighed in content and took your small hand in his, holding it to his cheek as his eyes fell shut once again. He kisses your wrist and opens his eyes. “i apologize for my behavior. it was unnecessary” he drops your hand and pulls you into his large figure, engulfing you in a warm embrace. You returned the embrace by holding him tight, breathing in his woodsy scent as you did so. your head just barely reached his chest, you felt like a princess in his arms. “your apology is accepted. you never have to question my devotion to you. Ask for reassurance and i will give it to you, sweet king.”

He released you and captured your lips in a soft but passionate kiss, he tasted of pine and elvish wine. you savored the kiss as your hands cupped his face, using your thumb to draw gentle circles over the points of his ears. You always loved his body language especially since you’re the only one who ever sees him express emotion besides Legolas. As the kiss ended, you smiled up at him, to which he returned but quickly was replaced with a huff of defeat, his eyes dared to close and his legs nearly trembling.

“you witch” he feigned the insult, merely joking as you gave his ears attention. Causing him to sweep you off your feet into his arms and head toward his chambers.

#legolas #legolas greenleaf #lotr elves #lord of the rings #lotr fanfic #orlando bloom #tolkien #thranduil x reader #thranduil #legolas x reader #lee pace #legolas thranduilion #mirkwood #fanfiction #elves #the elvenking #tolkien elves #two towers #the fellowship of the ring #return of the king #the hobbit #hobbit #the lord of the rings

[lonelym00n]

The End.

Part five of The Devil Likes the Pirate Series

Tara Carpenter x Reader

Word Count: 8.9k

Summary: All good things must come to an end, even if the path to get there is a difficult one.

Warnings: Spoilers for Scream VI, some violence, and a few buckets of angst!

A/N: That's it, it's done! For my first ever series, it's not terrible! Sure it could be better, but I'll happily settle for it being good. I never would've thought that my silly oneshot would've turned into this, but I'm so glad it did!

The Carpenter’s apartment goes from being quiet enough to hear a pin drop, to the loud thunder of arguing voices. 

Sam orders Tara to pack a bag, to get all of her stuff together quickly so they can take off.

Tara refuses, stating that Sam is overacting and that she doesn’t want to disrupt her life here in New York.

While the sisters are locked in a battle of crossed swords, you are preoccupied with your own feelings of unease. Mindy has been eyeing you with something akin to skepticism for the past few minutes and you are desperately trying not to panic under her scrutiny.

You have an idea of the conclusion that she’s likely come to. The attacks occurred last night, the same night that everyone was conveniently accounted for inside the apartment. Everyone but you.

All the current signs point to you and as daunting as it is, you can’t deny that if you were in Mindy’s shoes, you’d suspect yourself too. It didn’t take a mind as sharp as Mindy’s to piece together what it might mean that Ghostface reappeared at the same time that you were absent.

A sliver of luck is evidently on your side, because no one else but Mindy has stopped to consider potential suspects. 

You know that it’s going to be hard to talk Mindy out of her distrust in you, but you have to attempt to sway her opinion before she notifies the rest of the group. 

Without alerting anyone else, you cautiously wave Mindy over to you. 

Begrudgingly, she makes her way across the room. Her arms are crossed firmly over her chest while you chew your lip nervously.

“I know how it looks, Minds, but it wasn’t me.”

She snorts, “You do realize that’s exactly what the killer would say, don’t you?”

You attempt to swallow the lump that’s formed in your throat. This conversation was going to be harder than you thought. 

In the days that you were avoiding the rest of the group, Mindy had opened up to you about her trauma. She’d relayed that her uncle was known as the expert, the guy who knew just what to do to not only survive the killer, but to expose them. A ghost of a smile had appeared across her lips when she told you that she’d followed in his footsteps and taken up the same role. 

The task of convincing the expert that they’re wrong is overwhelmingly difficult, one incorrect move and no one will trust you for however long these attacks last.

“I swear that I went back to my room.”

There’s a wide and pleading look in your eyes, but it’s going to take a lot more than that to persuade her.

You’re scrambling for anything that can back up your alibi. “My roommate saw me! I can text her, shit I’ll call her.” 

Before you can dial the girl’s number, Mindy’s hand lands on your wrist. You snap your eyes up to meet hers.

“Alright, stop. I know how much you hate talking to her, you don’t have to call her.”

You heave out a sigh of relief. 

“You’re not off the hook completely, maybe you were at your dorm but there’s still a chance you could be lying. It’s not enough to check you off my list entirely, but I’ll leave it alone for now.”

“I get it,” swallowing thickly, you nod. 

 “Good.” 

Mindy turns to return back to the group, but stops short.

“You’re my friend and I care about you, but I won’t give you a second chance. If you screw up and do anything else that I find suspicious, I’ll make sure that none of us ever talk to you again.”

She doesn’t give you a chance to respond, but you don’t need to. You know she’d keep true to her word, and so you can only hope you don’t find yourself in the wrong place at the wrong time again.

You remain in your spot against the wall for a while. It’s in your best interest to try and blend in, so you’re in no rush to reenter the room.

Most of the others are still sitting on the couch, Sam’s pacing back and forth on the phone. Tara stands in the entryway of her room with her arms crossed defiantly. 

Sam turns to face everyone, “I’m going down to the station.”

She strides over to the door and Tara speeds over before she can exit. 

“I’m coming with you.”

Sam goes to argue, but Tara cuts her off, “We’re supposed to stick together, aren’t we?”

Though you are situated directly adjacent to the entryway, neither of the Carpenter sisters spare you a glance as they leave the apartment.

A sense of apprehension creeps up into your chest, and though it’s glaringly obvious, you have a sinking suspicion that everything is about to go terribly wrong, terribly quickly.

Attempting to ignore the fact that you’ve now become a character in a real life horror movie, you survey the rest of the room once more. Mindy and Anika are hushedly whispering between themselves, Quinn has returned to her room, and Ethan is distracting Chad with some video on his phone.

You want to leave, to lock yourself into your dorm room to process the fact that there’s a pretty high chance that you might die at the hands of a knife-bearing psycho in a halloween costume, but you can’t. You can’t risk being alone right now, not only because you’d be privy to an attack, but because Mindy’s words haven’t stopped swirling around in your head. No second chance.

So, despite your want to be alone, you trudge over to the couch and perch on the edge of it. Your hands come up to cover your face as you try your best to think of anything other than the worst case scenario of the situation you’ve found yourself in. 

Meanwhile, unbeknownst to you and the other occupants of the small apartment, another attack has occurred in the rundown bodega up the street. 

Sam and Tara, who just barely evaded the long-barrel of Ghostface’s shotgun, are now sitting in the precinct’s interrogation room, accompanied by Detective Wayne Bailey.

Once he receives both of the Carpenter’s alibis for the attack the night prior, he shifts his questioning to the other members of the group. 

Mindy and Chad are promptly vouched for, leaving you, Quinn, Anika, and Ethan vulnerable to Bailey’s queries. 

The gruff man asks about everyone else’s whereabouts last night, excluding Quinn who, as her father, he can check off the list.

A reluctant conversation silently takes place between the sisters.

Sam gives her sister a sorrowful look, as if to say, ‘We both know who wasn’t there, we have to tell him.’

Tara’s eyes widen, signaling her response, ‘But Sam-’

Sam places a heavy hand on Tara’s shoulder, patting it lightly. She turns to Detective Bailey.

“Anika, and Ethan stayed over at our apartment after the movie night.”

“And Y/N Y/L/N?”

Sam pauses, trying to avoid catching her sister’s pleading glance.

“She left late last night, we don’t know where she went.”

Bailey jots something down on his notepad before looking back up at the two sisters.

“We’ll call her in for questioning.”

Tara stays frozen in her seat, unmoving. All the while, her mind is shouting at her to jump to your defense. 

Her lips, however, remain pressed together in a thin, disconcerted line. She wants so badly to believe that you’re innocent, but a tiny nagging voice sings songs that you’re guilty and that you’re out for her blood, out to finish what Amber Freeman couldn’t.

Distantly, Tara notices that Bailey gets up to leave the room. She and Sam sit in silence, the older girl afraid to say anything in fear of upsetting her volatile sister.

Twenty minutes or so later, Detective Bailey returns.

“Before you ladies go, there’s someone here who wants to see you.”

The sisters stand and exit the room per Bailey’s instruction. A blond-haired woman shuffles forward. 

Sam’s eyes light up, “Kirby!” 

The blond chuckles, “Sam!” 

Kirby greets Tara, the small girl giving her a tight-lipped smile in return.

As the two catch-up, the sight of a figure being led in by an officer snags Tara’s attention. 

Back with the rest of the group, you remained in your own little bubble while everyone else chatted amongst themselves.

Following the pattern that has been laid out for you, your peace was quickly disturbed.

You had nearly dropped your phone when it rang loudly throughout the Carpenter’s apartment. You answered the call, only to be told by the police that you were to report to the station. The call was kept brief, but you knew the reason behind it nonetheless. 

Things only declined from that point forward. 

You were nervous, extremely so. You didn’t kill the film teacher, nor did you kill Jason or Greg, but the fact that you were being treated as a suspect for the murders had you anxious enough. 

You stood up on shaky legs, fumbling towards the door. Mindy pulled Anika closer to her at your haste, while Chad and Ethan merely side eyed you. 

No one said anything as you left, and despite the want to sob into your hoodie, you kept your head high and bit your tongue.

The officer who led you into the station was nice enough, her eyes didn’t scream guilty guilty guilty like your supposed friends’ did.

You kept your eyes firmly on your shoes throughout the walk. A tiny, familiar gasp made you stop short in your path.

You looked up and met Tara’s eyes. You were conflicted at how you felt when you looked at her, your usual longing and adoration joined by several other emotions. Heartache, desolation, and gut-wrenching hurt. 

She didn’t say anything to you, just blinked back at you with those gorgeous deep brown eyes, her expression completely unreadable.

You understood well enough that the cops were only aware of your potential involvement because someone had mentioned your name to them. You’d thought that Mindy had somehow silently tipped them off at first and sure, you were wounded by it, but the knowledge that it had been Tara? Well that nearly devastated you beyond repair.

If Mindy giving the police your name was a stab to the heart, then Tara having been the one to do it was six shots to the head and a complete dismemberment of your body. 

You were entirely conscious of what the girl had gone through with the Woodsboro attacks, and how her previous girlfriend had been the one behind it all. But even so, was it fair for Tara to be treating you this way?

Since you've fallen for the girl, she’s done nothing but emotionally harm you. It started with her flirtatious teasing that drew you into her like a blissfully unaware moth to a too bright flame. She’d had you hook, line, and sinker, but to worsen your infatuation, she’d kissed you. You were trapped by then, drowning in everything that came in the small package that was Tara Carpenter. 

Just as fast as she’d pulled you in, she’d pushed you away. She left you to piece yourself back together, and once you finally repaired the cracks, she was back, admitting that she’d wanted you all along.

And now, immediately after her admission, she’s accusing you of murder.

Though your head spun from the back-and-forth, you knew that you’d stupidly always be patiently waiting for her to reel you back in.

So no, it probably wasn’t fair for Tara to be treating you this way, but it wouldn’t stop you from wanting her all the same. How could you possibly distance yourself from her when she was all that you’d ever wanted? 

Your eyes sting with the familiar need to cry at how pathetic you feel. You’re hopelessly in love with the girl who thinks you’ve committed murder. Isn’t that just spect-fucking-tacular.

You throw her a dejected look and allow the officer to continue ushering you into the interrogation room. 

If Tara glances your way at any point after your nonverbal interaction, you don’t stop to notice. 

You have bigger fish to fry than your ill-advised love for her, like the fact that not only do she and all of your friends see you as a potential murderer, but the NYPD does too. 

You’re sitting in the room for a while, left to fester in the stale air. You’ve watched Criminal Minds and Law & Order, you know that this is a common tactic used to make criminals grow skittish. Though you are not a criminal, the biting silence in the room makes the tactic work on you all the same.

Your lip has been chewed raw and as you begin to faintly taste the sharp copper of blood, the heavy door swings open.

Two people walk in, introducing themselves as Detective Bailey and FBI Agent Kirby Reed.

Your skin pales at the title of the woman and the flash of her badge. They’d brought in an FBI Agent to question you?

They pull out the chairs in front of you and take a seat.

Detective Bailey clears his throat, “Y/N, we understand that you’re a friend of Samantha and Tara Carpenter.”

You nod tightly.

“We have reason to believe the sisters are under attack by a copycat Ghostface killer. Are you aware that both Carpenters were recently ambushed at a bodega near their apartment?”

The blood drains from your face at the mention of Ghostface by name. Wait-

“Tara was attacked?”

Kirby and Bailey exchange a look at your failure to include Sam in your question.

You, on the other hand, are mentally losing it. Tara was attacked, she must be so scared, so shaken up. It was easy to be distracted by your own involvement in the attacks, but god, this was Tara’s second time going through it. 

Seeing how panicked you are, Kirby has to refrain from placing a comforting hand on your shoulder.

“She’s okay, Sam too. Just a few cuts and scrapes here and there.”

The fact that she hadn’t been heavily injured comforts you. You nod to Kirby in thanks. 

Bailey, on the other hand, doesn’t care too much about your emotions. It’s clear that he’s taken over the bad cop persona, while Kirby plays the good cop. 

“So, where were you tonight?”

Oh right, you’re here to be interrogated for murder. Any thoughts of Tara’s wellbeing float away at the reminder that she gave your name to the cops for potential murder. 

“I was with Mindy, Anika, Chad, and Ethan, at Sam and Tara’s apartment. I came here as soon as I got the call.”

Bailey grunts and scribbles your response onto the notepad in front of him.

Once he’s done, he lifts his gaze up to meet yours and raises a singular, probing eyebrow.

“And what about last night?”

You bite your lip, suddenly feeling very fidgety.

“I went back to my dorm room and went to sleep.”

“Did anyone else see you? Can anyone confirm that?” Bailey stares you down, a tad bit menacingly. 

“My roommate, she saw me this morning before she left.”

Detective Bailey reluctantly accepts your answer, and requests your roommate's contact information to confirm that she’d seen you. You give it to him readily.

Kirby speaks up, voice gentle, “I just have a few more questions, and then we can let you go.”

Something about the way she’s treating you so kindly makes you even more anxious. Whether it’s that or her status as an FBI Agent, you aren’t sure.

She speaks slowly, like your English Lit professor does when she wants the class to catch on to the author’s analogy buried deep beneath the text.

“I specialize in determining whether certain murders have any connection to Ghostface. I know a lot about copycat killers, and what might motivate someone to put on a mask and become a ghostface.”

You get what she’s trying to convey. Boiling it all down, she’s good at telling Ghostface apart from non-ghostfaces. She can tell the guilty apart from the innocent. Wait that means-

Suddenly, you’re no longer scared of Kirby.

Suddenly, you’re hanging off of her every word like she’s a life raft in the middle of a barren ocean. And metaphorically, she is. She’s your last hope in the series of accusing fingers that have been pointed your way.

Her eyes gleam with the sense that you’ve understood her hidden implication. 

“So,” she pushes a singular photo in front of you, “Can you tell me who this is?”

The photo in front of you is a movie poster, with all the words edited off. A tall man stares down the camera, complete with blue coveralls and a pale white mask with tufts of hair coming out of the top. 

Though you aren’t a huge horror buff, you recognize the character. But is it right to know who he is, or should you lie?

“Um,” you swallow and pause for a second, “That’s Michael Myers, from Halloween.”

Kirby hums, and slides three more photos forward.

The first one has a character that wears a red and green striped sweater, with razors extending from his fingers. Freddy Krueger.

The second picture’s character is donning a menacing grin, and has distinct clown-like makeup on. If the makeup doesn’t give it away, the singular red balloon does. Pennywise.

The third character you are admittedly less familiar with. It’s a bald man with a stark white complexion. A series of nails adorn his head, and he has a long leather getup. In his palm, he displays a glowing box. Pinface? Pinhead?

You lift a sweaty hand to point at the first picture. Your voice is shaky, “Freddy Krueger from The Nightmare on Elm Street.”

You point to the second picture, “The movie IT, it’s Pennywise.”

Finally, your finger lands on the last picture. You’re hesitant, you think you know the answer but you’re still unsure if you should be getting these right or not. Would the killer know all these characters?

“I don’t know the name of the movie. And I’m not entirely sure, but I think that’s Pinhead.”

You think Kirby is pleased with your answer, because she simply collects the pictures and places them back into their folder. 

“I know it's a bit of a weird process, but it actually gives me a lot of information. That’s all I need from you, you can go now.”

Kirby’s face remains impassive, not revealing her current thoughts. Detective Bailey, on the other hand, is looking at you with something akin to a scowl.

You stand up, legs slightly wobbly. Kirby and Bailey get up to leave as well. Bailey continues down the hallway while Kirby holds the door for you. Before you can make it fully past the door frame, a strong hand landing on your shoulder makes you jump.

Kirby glances over her shoulder to make sure Bailey is out of earshot. She pulls a card out of her jacket and discreetly slides it into the front pocket of your sweatshirt. “Call me if you need something, or if anything happens. Especially if it’s anything that could be related to you-know-who.”

You look up at her gratefully, nodding. It’s her close-lipped way of saying she trusts you.

She releases your shoulder with a small pat, and you all but scramble out of the police station.

Once outside, you check your phone for any missed messages. Surprisingly, you see one from Mindy, telling you to meet her and everyone else at the park just off of campus. 

The same park that led to your Tara-related downward spiral. The same park that was home to the catalyst of your current separation from the rest of the group. Lovely, just lovely.

Reluctantly, you make your way over to the meeting spot, completely unsure of what horrible scenario would be awaiting you this time. 

Once at the park, you stop a distance away from the group to take in the scene. They’re seated together on the benches, the only empty seat next to Quinn. Mindy stands front and center, no doubt about to shed her expert wisdom on everyone.

As much as you’d rather turn and walk away, you shuffle forward and make your way over to sit next to Quinn. The group has gone silent at your arrival, but you keep your gaze firmly on your shoes, not wanting to face the judging looks that are being sent your way.

Mindy claps her hands together to break the tense silence, “Okay nerds, listen up. As terrifying as this all is, I’m actually glad I get a chance to redeem myself for not calling the killers last time.”

She takes a deep breath, “The way I see it, someone is out to make a sequel to the requel.”

Anika interrupts with a question, “Um, what’s a requel?”

Mindy gives her a sweet smile, “You’re beautiful sweetie, let’s hold questions til the end.”

 After a few comments from Sam and Tara about Stab, Mindy launches into a ramble about sequels and requels and franchises. You’re listening distantly, but are more distracted by the weight of your own exhaustion. Being interrogated by two officers of the law took a lot more out of you than you thought it would.

Your thoughts are placed on a back burner at Ethan’s voice entering the conversation. 

“Am I in the friend group?” 

Mindy nods, along with a few others.

“Am I-,” his voice breaks slightly, “Am I gonna die a virgin?” 

Mindy laughs through her nose, sharing a look with Anika at the boy’s admittance. 

“Weird overshare, but that brings us to our suspects.” 

You stiffen at the mention of the group’s suspects. So that’s why she’d texted you to come, not just to explain the rules, but to ridicule you in front of everyone.

She gestures towards the flustered boy, “Ethan, the shy dorky kid who no one suspects because he’s so shy and dorky.”

He splutters for a moment, “Wait- I’m a suspect just because I’m Chad’s roommate?”

Mindy scoffs, “Roommate lotteries can be juked, you could’ve fixed it to get closer to us.”

He remains silent, dumbfounded. Mindy moves on.

“Quinn, the slutty roommate, a horror movie classic!”

Quinn arches a perfectly plucked brow, “Sex positive, but thank you?”

Mindy rolls her eyes at the terminology. “How’d you end up rooming with Sam and Tara?”

“I answered their ad online?” She glances at the Carpenters.

“Say no more!” Mindy barks out a laugh, “You’ve already implicated yourself!”

Sam, sensing that Mindy is getting a bit too carried away with her antics steps in, “It was an anonymous ad, Mindy.

Tara nods, “Plus we vetted her, and her dad’s a cop.”

Mindy’s eyes widen and she exclaims, “‘Cuz having a cop dad is the perfect cover, do you not remember how these movies work, Tara?!”

Tara sits back in her seat, huffing.

Mindy shifts her attention to her girlfriend, “Next up, Anika.” 

The girl blows her a kiss and Mindy catches it goofily. Her face quickly morphs into a straight look, “Never trust the love interest.”

Anika pales.

“And finally, speaking of love interests.” The horror-loving girl whips to your direction, and regards you more seriously than she had the others. You want nothing more than to shrivel up and shrink down to the size of an ant.

“Y/N, who might I remind everyone, we met while she was wearing a devil costume.”

The feeling of everyone’s eyes burning into you makes you want to throw up. 

“We’ve known you the least amount of time, and I can’t be the only one who finds it weird that the only people you’re friends with are here right now. A killer, clearly trying to keep all ties short.”

You flinch and open your mouth to respond, but Mindy continues.

“You were noticeably absent the same night the killings began. And if that doesn’t implicate you enough, your perfect motive will.”

Though you want to scream at how unfair this is, you can only sigh and give in. At this point, you’ve realized there’s nothing you can do to make yourself seem less suspicious. They all think it’s you, so why defend yourself when it would only fall on ears that are unwilling to listen?

 “And what would my motive be?”

Mindy grins, victoriously. 

“You’re in love with Tara, and not just surface level love, no no no.” She laughs to herself, “You’re actually in love with her, and it goes so far deep that there’s no way out of it.”

The urge to throw up and empty your guts is stronger than ever. You’re pissed, but more so shocked that Mindy has stooped so far as to reveal this to the whole group. And right in front of Tara. She knows now, knows everything. The girl who can’t even decide if she wants to be with you now knows the full extent of your feelings for her. Fucking great. 

The last piece of your dignity is gone forever. Mindy speaks again, “She broke your heart when she said she only wanted to be friends. Trampled it even, and you were so upset that you decided to break hers too. Only literally.”

She faces everyone, clearly proud of herself, “There you have it folks, the perfect motive! Break my heart and I’ll break yours, but worse! A flawless romance-horror mashup.”

Everyone remains silent, just blinking at Mindy in astonishment. 

Your restrained sniffles break the silence. 

You rise, not even bothering to hide your tears or wipe them away. You’re broken, worse than you’ve ever been before. 

Before you can stomp away, you meet Mindy’s eyes, letting her see exactly how upset, angry, and ruined you are feeling.

Your tone is even and still as you spit in her direction, “Screw you, Mindy.”

With that, you walk away, uncaring if it makes you look any more suspicious. 

Watching as you move further and further away, Mindy finally decides to talk once more.

“I went too far, didn’t I?” She knew she always had a flair for the dramatics and it wasn’t the first time someone had been offended during one of her killer call-outs. 

Sam had been the last victim to be scorned by Mindy’s words, “Yeah, yeah I think it’s pretty obvious you went too far Mindy.”

Ever the protective big sister, she glances over at Tara to see how the younger girl has taken the news.

Tara is sat as straight as an arrow, eyes wide and blinking slowly. She looks utterly gobsmacked and as much as a little part of Sam wants to giggle like a child at her sister’s expression, the older and more mature version of her wins over.

“T, you okay?” Her voice is soft like a blanket, a tone she reserves just for Tara.

Tara comes back to life at Sam’s question. She shakes her head heatedly, “No, I’m not okay. Mindy, what the fuck?”

Mindy bristles slightly at Tara’s anger, no one likes being on the receiving end of her chihuahua-like biting remarks.

“Tara I-”

“Mindy, why the hell would you tell everyone that? She told you all of that and you just threw it right in her face?”

Mindy’s silence spurs Tara on.

“It’s one thing to accuse her of being Ghostface but to say all that? Really?”

Tara scoffs and pushes herself out of her seat. She starts striding to catch up with you, to say what exactly, she isn’t quite sure yet, but she’ll figure it out on the way.

To her dismay, a familiar hand catches her wrist and twists her around. 

It’s Sam, because who else would chase after an agitated Tara Carpenter?

“Tara, you can’t go after her.”

“She’s upset Sam, and it’s not safe for her to be alone and upset with a killer on the loose.”

Sam frowns, lips almost forming a pout, but nods in agreement. “I know Tara. She’s really upset. But it’s not safe for you to be alone with someone who could very well be the killer.”

Though the shorter girl is still unsure of whether or not you could actually be the one behind the mask, it's the last thing she's thinking of in this moment. A snarl forms on her face, “So you agree with Mindy.”

The older Carpenter is quick to defend herself, “I’m not saying I agree with Mindy, I just don’t think that you and I should split up. Can we keep staying together Tara, please? I can’t let you get hurt again.”

Tara deflates like a balloon, the angry miniature dog that lives in her finally gone. She nods in resignation and lets Sam lead her back to the group.

Meanwhile, you finally make it back to your dorm. You pluck Kirby’s business card out of your pocket and carefully examine it. The only information given is a phone number and her name. 

You debate calling her for a moment, maybe you’d be able to find some comfort in the agent. She was the only one who didn’t think you were Ghostface, after all. 

You decide against it, choosing to instead stew in your overwhelming emotions. You’d finally been granted time to process the onslaught of events, a brief calm in the inevitable storm.

Just as it was weeks before, your bed remains your safe space. You move to plug your phone into your charger, but stop short upon seeing a message.

Tara: hey, we’re making dinner at the apt and having evryone stay over tn.

Tara: u should come

The invitation leaves you frozen for a minute. Why would she want you to stay over with everyone else? Was this some sick move for her to corner you and reject you once and for all?

You aren’t sure what to respond with, so you leave her text unanswered. You can’t think rationally right now, so you plug your phone in, lay your head on your pillow, and succumb to the swirl of your emotions.

You lay there, staring up at your ceiling and sobbing, for what must be a few hours. Your friends think you’re a killer, and Tara knows the full extent of your love for her.

Your phone, ever the annoyance, interrupts your breakdown with the alert of an incoming call.

Groaning, you roll over and pick it up without looking.

“Hello?,” your hoarse voice croaks out.

“Why hello, Y/N. About time we talked, don’t you think?” 

The voice is teasing, like it’s somehow toying with you.

A chill shoots up your spine, and you sit up against your headboard. You sort of recognize the voice, but you can’t place how you know it.

“Who’s this?”

A laugh rings out and it somehow freaks you out even more.

“Since I like you, I’ll give you a hint. What’s your favorite scary movie?”

You drop your phone onto your lap and scramble away from it, as if it was purely responsible for how terrified you feel. 

Shit, shit, shit.

Back when you were avoiding everyone, Mindy had insisted for you to watch Stab 1 with her, since you’d never seen it before. You tried to refuse, but she shut you up with just one look. Rolling your eyes, you allowed her to put the movie on.

Though she was providing commentary throughout the entire opening, you’d heard the voice that had spoken with Casey Becker on the phone. 

You heard Casey’s killer ask her the same question you’d just been asked.

Fuck.

It was him, somehow, someway, he’d gotten your number and was calling you.

You were on the phone with none other than Ghostface.

Shit.

The person on the line chuckles, their altered voice muffled because of the way the phone is being pressed into your comforter, “Now I’ve got your attention.”

With trembling hands, you pick your phone up. “What do you want with me?”

“To thank you. Y’know because of you, I get a little more wiggle room. More time to be off on my own, carving up another person or two, or planning out exactly how I’m going to kill Tara.”

“Leave her alone!”

“Oooh feisty, but not a chance. I think I’ll burn her alive and shoot her in the head, just like she did to Amber.”

“Amber was a psycho and so are you!”

“Maybe, but you’re the one who everyone thinks is psycho.”

Clenching your fists, you remain silent.

Ghostface continues, “I think I’ve decided I want to play a little game. A new game I made just for you.”

Your heart pounds in your chest, full of pure fear. “I’m not playing any games.”

“Too bad. It’s a guessing game, it’s simple really. You guess if I’m in your bathroom waiting to spill your guts all over the place, or if I’m under Tara’s bed, ready to slice through her skin at any second.”

Your blood runs cold as you turn towards the tiny bathroom connected to your dorm room. The door is shut, and an eerie silence fills the room. Ghostface could be in there right now, and you’d be dead in seconds. Worse, he could be biding his time for the perfect time to strike an unsuspecting Tara.

“Tick tock,” the killer sings.

You steel yourself and cautiously position yourself upright, ready to bolt towards your door.

“You’re in my bathroom, come out and get me you fucker.”

The bathroom door stays shut, and you’re left poised in a tense position, adrenaline coursing through your veins.

“Y/N, Y/N, Y/N, I’m afraid you’re wrong.” Oh god.

“Don’t hurt her!”

“I have to. We have unfinished business.” The words are spat out, clearly in raw anger.

The teasing tone plays through the voice modulator once more, “Thanks for being apart from everyone again, it really helps that you’re always able to take the fall for me.”

Ghostface ends the call. You clamber out of bed, toss on the nearest pair of shoes, and sprint out of the door, though not before grabbing the 3.5 x 2 inch card off of your dresser. 

While racing like a madman to the Carpenter’s apartment, you dial Kirby’s number.

After one ring, she picks up. “Agent Reed.”

“Kirby!” You’re panting as you hurry along.

“Y/N?”

“Yes! Kirby you have to get to Tara and Sam’s now! Ghostface is there.”

You can faintly make out her rustling around, likely collecting her jacket and gun.

“I’m on my way. What happened, how do you know?”

“He called me, Kirby. He’s setting me up!”

“Shit, okay get there as soon as you can.”

“I’m trying!”

This can’t happen to you, not again. Your stupid emotions about everyone thinking you were guilty fucked things up even more. If they didn’t hate you and suspect you before, your absence now definitely cements your fate.

Your only hope is to make it there in time to help defend against Ghostface. 

But alas, luck isn’t on your side. When you arrive at the Carpenter’s apartment, you’re met with yellow caution tape and the flashing red and blue lights of both ambulances and police cars. 

Too little, too late. 

You aren’t even sure what to do, not knowing if it’s better for you to turn and walk away, or to feebly defend yourself like a broken record. You see a body bag being rolled by on a stretcher, and the sight of it makes everything that you’re feeling so much worse.

One of your friends is dead.

You aren’t angry at them for how they treated you anymore, how they turned their backs on you so quickly. You can’t be angry. Not when someone died at the hands of whoever was behind this. Not when you’re being so cruelly reminded that this isn’t a petty fight, or a game night squabble. 

One of your friends is dead. 

You’re sad, instead. So immensely sad. And scared, your limbs still shake from the residual fear leftover from the phone call. The killer was taunting you on the phone, so shouldn’t you have been the next one to go? Whoever died didn’t deserve to, not while you just got to freely exist.

But like Mindy had said, you’ve been brought into a franchise, and everyone has a role in a franchise. Your friend is now nothing more than a notch under the famed killer’s belt, a tally for the rankings of a video titled ‘which slasher villain has the highest kill count?’

And your role?

You’re the killer’s toy, their beat-up ragdoll held together by loosened strings that they’d stopped caring about years ago, but still blame for every mess they create.

You’re the scapegoat, the one to blame, traveling down a path of loneliness and carrying around the killer’s sins for all to judge you for. Just when your innocence is proven, you’ll die, a sacrifice the killer is all too happy to make.

You sigh heavily, the weight of your thoughts resting deeply on your shoulders. You can’t feel sorry for yourself though. Not when you’re still alive, still breathing.

You can’t walk away, because running from your problems has just made everything worse.

The cops are distracted, so you slide underneath the caution tape. You sluggishly drag your feet towards the ambulance, further into the throng.

Mindy’s sitting in the back of the vehicle, a blanket wrapped around her shivering form.

You approach her, moving as shakily as a baby deer.

She sees you out of the corner of her eye. You watch as hers widen exponentially, “Stay the fuck back.”

You halt. The fearful and disgusted look in her eyes at the sight of you swallows you whole. 

Tears cloud your vision, “Are you okay?”

She remains quiet, just staring at you, unblinking.

“Dumb question.” 

Mindy blinks again.

You don’t know what to say, and you don’t get a chance to. You’re being ripped away from Mindy, met with Sam’s blazing eyes.

You can just barely see Tara behind her, looking smaller than ever.

Sam grips your chin, forcing you to look up at her. 

“Where the fuck were you?” She barks.

The murderous glare she’s leveling you with has you shrinking into your skin. “I- I was in my room.”

“Liar!”

“Sam, please. You have to believe me, I’m not lying.” You’re crying now, because she’s still looking at you like an untamed beast waiting to rip your heart out.

Near blubbering, you continue, “He called me, Ghostface called me.” 

The reminder of how scared and alone you felt on the phone with Ghostface makes your cry even harder, and Sam softens slightly, albeit still glaring at you.

“What’d he say?”

“He thanked me for helping him look less suspicious. He said it gave him more time to plan his next kills.” It’s a conscious decision not to include that he’d specifically mentioned how he’d kill Tara. Sam would rip your head off right on the spot.

She stares at you, trying to decipher if you’re telling the truth.

You heave in a breath, preparing yourself to finish your recount, “He made me play a guessing game. He told me to guess whether he was waiting to kill me, or Tara.”

Sam is scarily still. In the distance, you can see Chad harshly slamming Ethan into a van.

If Sam, Tara, Mindy, Chad, and Ethan are here, then that leaves…

Quinn. And Anika. God.

If you weren’t about to be strangled by Sam, you’d likely curl into a ball and sob at the knowledge that the two girls you’d seen earlier today are gone. 

You’d beg and plead with Sam if it meant she’d believe you. “I ran here as soon as I realized he was gonna hurt her. You have to believe me.”

You stare up at her with shiny eyes, praying she accepts your story.

Without warning, you’re released from the death grip that she had on you. Sam backs away from you without saying a word, slinking back towards Tara.

You meet the younger Carpenter’s gaze for one brief second, before you tear your eyes away. You couldn’t afford to decipher how she currently felt towards you. It hurt enough to be painted as the killer, you didn’t need her rejection of your love for her to pile up on top of your already too intense hurt. 

From your spot alone, in the middle of the group, you can hear Mindy telling an apologetic Ethan to get away from her. She tells him how the two of you are at the top of her list, and that she didn’t need either of you near her ever again.

Though you aren’t part of the conversation, her words still bruise. You might’ve called her your best friend once, probably still would, but she’d forever condemn your name.

You wallow in your sorrow while Gale shows up, sharing a regretful exchange with the two sisters. Kirby comes soon after, also checking up on the Carpenters.

Gale announces to everyone that she’s found what’s likely the killer’s hideout, and everyone silently follows along while she leads the way.

You walk a ways behind the group, arms wrapped around your own waist both defensively and protectively. A firm body knocks their shoulder against yours, breaking you out of your daze.

Kirby levels you with a worried look, “You good kid?”

“Don’t worry about me, ask the others.”

She clicks her tongue at your response, “Already did, now I wanna know how you’re doing.”

You reach a hand up and drag it through your hair, “Mindy hates me, probably Chad too by association. I can’t tell how Sam feels, if she thinks it’s me or not. And I can’t even  bring myself to look at Tara, let alone ask her if she thinks I’m out to murder her.”

Kirby shoots you a sympathetic look, “That’s a lot for one person to deal with.”

You shrug, “Yeah well, nothing I can do about that.”

The two of you finish the walk towards the abandoned theater in silence.

Before you enter, Kirby places a hand on your arm to stop you.

“We’re gonna catch who’s behind this eventually. Why don’t you stick with me for the time being?”

Your eyes light up, “I’d love that.”

And truthfully you would. Staying by Kirby’s side will not only be comforting, but will also ensure that you’re no longer left to accidentally fall into a situation that makes you look guilty. For the first time since all of this started, you feel seen, like you finally have a friend that’s on your side.

She smiles at you and the two of you enter the theater. You soon realize that it’s less of a theater, and more of a shrine dedicated to the Ghostfaces of the past.

Everyone fans out to inspect the items. You’re stuck to Kirby’s side like glue, inching your way towards a display case.

She carefully places her hands atop the case, scanning her eyes across the items.

Pointing out a few items, she speaks out to no one in particular. “Charlie stabbed me with that knife, and that’s the same flannel Jill was wearing.”

You hum sadly, what she went through must have been so horrible. 

The rest of the visit to the shrine is lonely for you. Kirby leaves to bond with Mindy, then to check on Tara. You’re left to stand in a corner, trying to blend in with the shadows.

When Kirby returns, the group clusters together, forming a plan.

As you sit by Kirby’s side in the van, the plan quickly goes to shit. The killer’s call is traced back to Gale’s apartment, leaving the Carpenter sisters to race to her rescue.

You and Kirby head back to the precinct for a while, where she combs through her files once more. She gets a call about a new plan, and the two of you hop back into her car, headed back towards the abandoned theater.

Sam, Tara, and Chad stand outside. 

Chad points to you, where you’re standing by Kirby’s side. “Is it safe for her to come in with us?”

You swallow at his retort.

Kirby calmly comes to your defense, “Safer than leaving her alone, yes. Where’s Mindy?”

Sam explains that Mindy got separated and had to take a different train with Ethan.

Kirby quirks an eyebrow, “Okay, well it’s better if we wait inside.”

The others go their separate ways, leaving you and Kirby to stand by the door. She double checks the ammunition in her gun, and makes sure her bulletproof vest is intact. 

A few minutes pass where you’re left to sit and wait. With Kirby distracted with her gun and you distracted with your thoughts, neither of you notice the figure creeping up behind her.

Kirby falls to the ground, groaning before she falls unconscious. Before you can think of screaming, you’re hit hard in the back of the head.

You land next to Kirby on the ground, head spinning as your world fades to black.

You’re groggy as you wake, but you quickly notice that Kirby is nowhere to be found. You stand and take a minute to regain your bearings.

Once you’ve calmed down, you start to make out the faint sounds of voices in the main room. You slowly approach, stopping dead in your tracks once you see what’s going on.

Sam and Tara are clutching bricks, trying to defend themselves from Quinn and Ethan, who are wearing the ghostface robes and taunting the sisters with knives. 

Detective Bailey stands in front of them, waving around a gun as he monologues.

To your dismay, Quinn notices you.

“Well, if it isn’t our favorite accomplice.”

Bailey turns to face you, grinning. 

“Come on over, join us!”

The rest of the group can’t see from where his back is turned, but his gun is aimed at you and his eyes are threatening. You comply, terrified as you inch forward.

When you’re within reach, Bailey reaches out and wraps an arm tightly around your shoulders, the force of his arm nearly knocking the wind out of you.

He turns to taunt the two sisters, “We couldn’t have done it without her. Your little girlfriend was a great help, Tara.”

Sam and Tara look shocked and then betrayal fills their eyes.

You’re confused, caught up in fear and panic.

Sam’s scoffs, “You needed four people just to take me out? That’s pathetic.”

Only now do you realize what’s going on. Bailey’s making it seem like you’ve been helping them all along, still not allowing you to be innocent.

Your eyes are wide and begging for the umpteenth time, “Wait, I didn’t help them!”

Ethan rolls his eyes, a tiny hidden smirk on his face, “Drop the act! This is the fun part Y/N, remember? Like we talked about.”

You try to wiggle out of Bailey’s grip, but he’s unwavering.

Your struggling causes you to meet Tara’s eyes. She looks devastated, like her worst thoughts were coming to life. 

“Let me go! I didn’t help them, Tara please! Please it wasn’t me! They’re lying!”

Your cheeks are wet with your tears. 

Bailey looks between you and Tara for a second before a smirk slowly spreads across his face.

“Well Tara, it looks like it’s up to you.” He tucks his gun into his waistband and pulls out a knife. 

He gestures to you with the knife, “Girlfriend, or killer?”

The knife presses against your abdomen, ready to strike. 

Time pauses for a second, while your eyes are locked on Tara’s. You’re pleading, the most desperate you’ve been up to this point. Your life is quite literally on the line, and if Tara chooses not to trust you, you’re dead. 

Her mouth is agape, opening and closing, as she glances to Sam for help. Sam shakes her head and mouths a trust no one to her sister.

Tara remains conflicted.

Bailey growls, “Girlfriend or killer, Tara. Choose one.”

Tara’s gaze hardens, but you can still see how her eyes are flitting around worriedly. 

She’s biting her lip hard.

You decide to try to sway her one more time, this is the girl you love, who knows how much you love her, though not by your choice. You don’t know if she returns your feelings, but this isn’t the time to be fearful of rejection. At least if she still doesn’t believe your innocence, you’ll die knowing you did everything you could to save yourself.

You don’t sound desperate anymore, just broken. “Tara, I- I love you. And I wouldn’t do this to you, or Sam, or any of our friends. You know me better than anyone else, so you should know I’m telling the truth. I have been all along.”

The room is still and silent. 

Tara looks into your eyes, and whatever it is she sees, it makes her finally open her mouth to respond. She’s looking right at you as she speaks, “I believe you.”

It’s then that the room erupts into chaos.

You’re blinded with pain as Bailey’s knife enters your insides and twists around.

“You got it right Tara, but you’re too late.”

The knife is pulled out and thrusted back in. A trail of blood leaks out of your mouth.

Quinn and Ethan laugh. Tara’s screams ring loudly throughout the shrine, but she is held from running towards you by Sam. 

You’ve lost track of how many times the knife has entered your body. The pain is so intense that you can’t even feel it anymore.

Your vision is spotty, and you slide limply out of Bailey’s grip to crash unceremoniously to the ground.

You’re left to wonder why no one’s ever said how sickening it is to feel your own life draining from your body. Maybe because they didn’t live to retell the pain?

As your eyes drift shut, you think back to the first night you’d met Tara. How you found her to be so alluring, so painstakingly beautiful. You remember the offhand internal comment you made after hours of blushing under her relentless teasing, when you’d said to yourself that this girl would someday be the death of you.

You’d laugh at the irony if you had enough energy to do so.

With the hopes of being reincarnated into a simpler life, you finally stop fighting death’s cold grasp and allow yourself to fade away.

And fade away you do.

Until the paramedics are pumping you full of drugs, their arms flying around you with practiced precision. They’re stitching, and bandaging, and doing everything they can to save your life.

Somehow, someway, they do it. They save you.

A week later, your eyes open for the first time. 

The room is empty, your only company being a vase full of wilted flowers. 

You’re covered by a thin blue blanket from the waist down. You’d reach down and assess the damage, but your arms don’t want to cooperate, still too weak to comply with your brain’s request.

Besides, you’re alive, shouldn’t that be all that matters?

It’s then that you hear two voices out in the hallway, growing louder as they likely approach your room.

The door opens, and you suck in a breath. It’s Sam and Tara, the latter of the two clutching a fresh bouquet of flowers in her uninjured arm.

They haven’t noticed you’re awake yet, still continuing their previous conversation.

“Hi.” You mentally kick yourself for always having the most awkward greetings.

They gasp and turn to face you.

“You’re awake!” Tara flies towards you and carefully embraces you, mindful of your barely healed injuries. You make a small noise in response, though eventually slowly lift your arms to return the hug.

Sam leaves to go inform the nurse of your condition.

The small girl pulls away to set the flowers down, before moving to gingerly sit on the side of the bed.

She lifts a hand to cup your face, silently stroking your cheek with her thumb.

“I owe you a huge apology,” she begins. 

You shake your head, “We have plenty of time to talk about that, let’s just exist for now, yeah?”

She nods, big brown eyes scanning your face nervously. You watch curiously, as she seemingly works up some confidence.

“Is it true, what Mindy said?”

You pale, and meekly nod your head, knowing she’s referring to when Mindy exposed your love for her.

She’s launching herself towards you again, stopping with her lips mere millimeters away from your lips, a silent question of permission lurking in her eyes.

You glance down at her lips, wondering if they’re as soft as they were the first time you’d kissed her.

She takes that as your answer, and closes the gap. You’re drowning again, in everything that is Tara Carpenter, but there’s nowhere else you’d rather be.

There’d be time to talk later, to work through your issues of trust with her and everyone else, but for now? 

You were perfectly content with the blissful feeling of being consumed by Tara, of her expressing everything left unsaid with just her lips.

You’re scarred and hurt, beaten and bruised, but none of it matters.

You’re kissing Tara, and she’s enough. More than that, she’s all you’ll ever need.

Bonus note: Everyone thank @cartierdreamx for the happy ending, as much as I love it, r's death would've really fueled the evil angst rat that lives inside of me. Send me your thoughts, I'm so excited to hear what you all think after reading!

Taglist: @thenextdawn @dreifhraniquo29 @fanboy7794 @thelonewriter247 @simp4natasha @cartierdreamx @btay3115 @friedryes @bananasplits-world @alexkolax @ordelixx @adaydreamaway08 @youralphawolf72

As always, so sorry if I forgot to add anyone to the list that asked to be added! I tried my best to add everyone!! <3

#tara carpenter x reader #tara carpenter x y/n #tara carpenter x you #scream fanfic #devil likes the pirate series #lonelym00n fic

[gods-favorite-autistic]

Good Omens incorrect quotes:

Aziraphale: You know, I'm starting to regret showing you how that blender works.

Crowley, drinking toast: Why do you say that?

~

Aziraphale: Violence isn't the answer.

Crowley: You’re right.

Aziraphale: *sighs in relief*

Crowley: Violence is the question.

Aziraphale: What?

Crowley, bolting away: And the answer is yes.

Aziraphale, running after them: NO-

~

Aziraphale: Do you take constructive criticism?

Crowley: I only take cash or credit.

~

Aziraphale: I've already sent good vibes your way… they’re coming. There’s nothing you can do to stop them.

Crowley: This is the most threatening way I’ve ever been cheered up.

~

Aziraphale: *Kicks the door down looking panicked*

Crowley: What did you do?

Aziraphale: Nobody died.

Crowley: WHAT KIND OF ANSWER IS THAT?!

~

Aziraphale: Treat spiders the way you want to be treated.

Crowley: Killed without hesitation.

Aziraphale: No.

~

*how season 3 should start*

Aziraphale: Top 30 reasons why Aziraphale is sorry... Number 5 will surprise you!

Crowley: Top 30 anime deaths. Number One: YOUR FUCKING ASS RIGHT NOW!!!

~

Crowley: You're right.

Aziraphale: That's... That's an unusual phrase for you. Did you just learn it?

~

Beelzebub: I’m going to take you out

Gabriel: great, it’s a date!

Beelzebub: I meant that as a threat.

Gabriel: See you at five!

~

Crowley: *Walking in to a room* Sorry I’m late... I was... doing things.

*Sounds of running footsteps progressively getting louder*

Gabriel: *Out of breath* THEY PUSHED ME DOWN THE FUCKIN’ STAIRS.

~

Beelzebub: I made tea.

Crowley: I don’t want tea.

Beelzebub: I did not make tea for you. This is my tea.

Crowley: Then why are you telling me?

Beelzebub: It is a conversation starter.

Crowley: That’s a lousy conversation starter.

Beelzebub: Oh, is it? We are conversing. Checkmate.

~

Aziraphale: This is bothering me.

Crowley: Well, you are digging up a corpse.

Aziraphale: No, not that. That's, uh, pretty par for the course, actually.

~

Aziraphale: Whaddya call a fish with no eye?

Gabriel, not looking up: Myxine Circifrons

Aziraphale:

Aziraphale: fsh

~

Crowley: God, give me patience.

Gabriel: I think you mean 'give me strength'.

Crowley: If God gave me strength, you'd be dead.

~

Aziraphale: You know, not every problem can be solved with a sword.

Crowley: That's why I carry two swords.

~

Gabriel: So what’s for dinner?

Beelzebub, staring at the food they just burnt: Regret.

~

Muriel: Why are you on the floor?

Crowley: I'm depressed.

Crowley: Also I was stabbed, can you get Aziraphale, please.

~

Store Worker: Would a Mr. Fell please come to the front desk?

Aziraphale, arriving at the desk: Hello, is there a problem?

Store Worker: points to Crowley and Muriel

Store Worker: I believe they belong to you?

Crowley and Muriel, simultaneously: We got lost :(

Aziraphale: I didn’t even bring you guys here with me-

~

Muriel: Sometimes I drink milk straight out of the container.

Crowley: The cow???

Muriel: What?

Aziraphale: Crowley, W H Y?

~

Aziraphale: Do you ever want to talk about your emotions, Crowley?

Crowley: … No.

Muriel: I do!

Aziraphale: I know, Muriel.

Muriel: I’m sad!

Aziraphale: I know, Muriel.

~

Muriel: What if I press the brake and gas at the same time?

Crowley: The car takes a screenshot.

Aziraphale: For the last time, get the fuck out.

~

Crowley: Aziraphale and I don’t use pet names.

Nina: I see. Hey, what are those things with the halos called again??

Crowley: Angel?

Aziraphale: Yes, dear?

Crowley:

Nina: Don't ever lie to my face again.

~

Muriel: I really like this whole ‘good guy, bad guy’ thing you guys have going on.

Crowley: It’s not an act, it’s just that I’m mean and Aziraphale isn’t

~

Aziraphale: We need a distraction.

Crowley: Is anyone here good at jumping up and down and making weird noises?

Muriel, whispering: My time has come

~

Aziraphale: Let me show you a picture from last night that really upset me

Muriel: Okay, but in my defense, Mr. Crowley bet me 50 cents I couldn’t drink all that shampoo.

Aziraphale: That’s not what I wanted to- you drank SHAMPOO?!

~

Aziraphale: Crowley, keep an eye on Gabriel today. They're going to say something to the wrong person and get punched.

Crowley: Sure, I’d love to see Gabriel get punched.

Aziraphale: Try again.

Crowley, sighing: I will stop Gabriel from getting punched.

~

Maggie: Are you the big spoon or the little spoon?

Crowley: I'm a knife.

Aziraphale, from across the room: They're the little spoon.

~

Aziraphale, driving Crowley and Muriel: So how was your day?

Muriel: We almost got surprise adopted!

Aziraphale: What?

Crowley: We almost got kidnapped.

Aziraphale: Oh, okay.

Aziraphale: *slams on the breaks* WAIT WHAT?

~

Aziraphale: You have to apologize to Gabriel

Crowley: Fine.

Crowley: 'Unfuck you' or whatever.

~

Crowley: Hey angel,

Aziraphale: Yes?

Crowley: Can a person breathe inside a washing machine while it’s on?

Aziraphale:

Aziraphale: Where’s Gabriel?

~

Aziraphale: WHY. why did you give Muriel a KNIFE?!

Crowley: I’m sorry. They said they felt unsafe.

Aziraphale: Now I feel unsafe!

Crowley: I’m sorry.

Crowley: ... would you like a knife?

~

Muriel: Hey, Mr. Crowley? Can I get some dating advice?

Crowley: Just because I’m with Aziraphale doesn’t mean I know how I did it.

~

Aziraphale: Crowley and I are having a baby.

Muriel: That's gre-

Aziraphale, slamming adoption papers on the table: It's you, sign here.

~

Muriel: Are you sure this is the right direction?

Crowley: Certainly, I'm as sure as I am honest!

Aziraphale: In that case, we're definitely lost

~

Muriel: What do you think Mr. Crowley will do for a distraction?

Aziraphale: They’ll probably, like, make a noise or throw a rock. That’s what I would do.

*Building explodes and several car alarms go off*

Aziraphale: ... or they could do that.

~

Aziraphale: I trust Crowley.

Muriel: You think they know what they're doing?

Aziraphale: I wouldn't go that far.

~

Aziraphale: While I’m gone, Muriel, you’re in charge.

Muriel: Yes!!!

Aziraphale, whispering: Crowley, you’re secretly in charge.

Crowley: Obviously.

~

Aziraphale: In your opinion, what’s the height of stupidity?

Crowley: *turning to Gabriel* How tall are you?

#featuring a lot of inneffable husbands #Crowley and Aziraphale being Muriel’s parents essentially #Aziraphale refusing to let Crowley drive with Muriel in the car #a tiny bit of inneffable bureaucracy #a whole lot of Crowley openly hating Gabriel now that he can’t get smited for that #bad influence Crowley #Maggie and Nina supporting the dumbass gays #they/them Crowley and Muriel #and just Crowley being my favorite character #maddy’s thoughts (taken straight from the brain) #good omens #good omens 2 #inneffable husbands #inneffable bureaucracy #incorrect good omens quotes

[hauntedhokage]

check yes

Nanami Kento/F!Reader

summary: Nanami makes a request of Gojo to use his connections to arrange his marriage. He just wasn’t expecting to develop a crush on the person arranging his marriage. 

word count: 4.2k

warnings: inexplicit references to sexual content

note: I had a very different intention for how this would flow but this is not it. oh well.

[ao3 link] [masterlist] [nanami masterlist] [ko-fi + commissions]

He was already starting to regret this. The house he was brought to was lavish, well maintained and belonging to an owner who took excellent care of the property. Someone from Gojo’s circles outside of Jujutsu Tech and not someone he’d rub elbows with commonly. In all fairness, they weren’t people Nanami wanted to rub elbows with either, but he felt it was natural to be nervous in a house this nice. Just how lucrative was this business anyway?

“Gojo, where did you bring me?”

“I said I’d bring you to the best in the world, didn’t I?” He did say that, but this was Satoru Gojo. There was always a joke or a loophole, Nanami learned to expect that. “This is where the best in the world lives and works - but only for her favorite clients.”

Just how many people had Gojo brought here that he’d become a favorite? Or was he really a favorite? Again, this was Satoru Gojo. 

“When you said you had a proposition for me, I thought I’d finally get the big fish engaged.” The teasing tone pulled his attention to the staircase, and he rose an eyebrow at the sight of a woman who seemed vaguely familiar but he couldn’t place from where. “Who’s this?”

“Kento Nanami. A grade one sorcerer in need of a lady friend.”

“Why can’t you ever give me a proper introduction?” Nanami asks, following behind Gojo when his coworker moves to follow you into a room off to the side of the staircase. 

You’re standing at a bookcase, opening and flipping through various notebooks until you find what you’re looking for, and Nanami notices that the notebook has Gojo’s name on the front of it when you turn to face them. Based on the size of the notebook and how worn it was, you do a lot of work with Gojo. Both men sit at the desk but you opt to continue standing as you flip through pages, and Nanami takes the time to observe how neat your office was. Art prints on the walls, a couple certificates, and two swords that he could feel the cursed energy radiating off of. Imbued with strong cursed energy, he’d assume you’d had a heavenly pact if he hadn’t already felt the fountain of energy you contained. It felt different from Gojo, it was warmer - much more comforting.

“Kento Nanami,” you mumble, writing in the notebook and only once barely glancing up from the page to see him watching you intently. “You’ve got a technique, right?”

“Seven-to-three. It’s a ratio technique.”

“So someone interested in math might be a plus. Height?”

And he’s forthcoming with the answers to your questions - sometimes having to correct Gojo’s incorrect answers - and he hates that Gojo is getting so much detailed information about himself that was so delicately tucked away. Things about him that would be used against him, as if Nanami asking Gojo about how to have his own marriage arranged wasn’t fuel enough for relentless teasing from the so-called strongest sorcerer. 

“Is there a type of woman you’re most interested in?”

“Intelligent, patience, and being competent in a kitchen is a bonus but not required. I’m more than capable of cooking for myself.”

“You want a spouse who can keep herself occupied, I’m sure. Employed?”

“Unnecessary. I have an ample salary to care for two.”

“Appearance?” 

“That’s irrelevant to me. What is most important is what lies beneath.” 

That had you looking up from the notebook, pen halting only for a moment before you recovered and crossed something out before writing something else. Gojo was shocked enough for the entire room, you didn’t have anything else to add. 

It’s only another twenty minutes and a couple pictures with requests for others where he looks less constipated before you’re walking them to the front door of your home while explaining next steps to Nanami. He’d expect to hear from you in a couple days with a date and time to look at profiles of prospective brides that you pulled based on the information you got from him today and estimated compatibility scores. 

Gojo is left with a demand that he deal with the Zen’in clan who had been in contact with you regarding Megumi’s future plans for marriage that were none of your business. It seemed you had the same opinion of the clan that Gojo did, which wasn’t surprising but was definitely interesting. He'd have expected your work to not interfere with the dealings of the clans, but he supposed the jujutsu world was always dancing around the wishes of the clans.

“How do you know her?”

“We worked together a few years back on a special grade that had popped up while she was in Tokyo running errands. She doesn’t do a lot of sorcerer work, but she’ll gear up if her services are requested. Mostly she gets paid good money to arrange marriages for people like us.”

“But not you?”

“I’m too busy for a spouse. You’ve got strict hours and a real want for someone to come home to, better suited for marriage than someone like me.”

Everyone eventually resigned themselves to their fate. Maybe in a few years Gojo will change his mind, slow down in his work and let himself accept what he knew they all wanted deep down: a way to escape from the harsh reality that was the world of jujutsu. For now, that wasn’t an issue for Nanami to make his own so he wasn’t going to allow this to slide for the time being.

“Y’know I’m sure Shoko would let you take her out on a date - for practice, of course.”

Nanami pretends to not have heard the suggestion. Shoko had much more important things to do than go on pretend dates with him.

Two weeks pass before he’s sitting in your home again. This time not in your office, but outside on your back patio enjoying a tea and light snacks while going through the stacks of folders produced with potential marriage candidates. You preferred pen and paper to digital record keeping, printed photographs on glossy paper or the occasional polaroid carefully fastened to the folder with a paperclip. Some records were so extensive that an actual binder was required rather than just a folder, whether that was by your design or the client’s he’d yet to figure out. 

There were two loaded binders, three thick folders, and two thinner ones stacked on the side of the table, and he dreads needing to look through them all. Arranging a marriage seemed much more simple when he floated the idea past Gojo - it didn’t feel like he’d need to be so involved. He could learn to live with and care for anybody as would be his responsibility as a husband - the responsibility he was signing up for by requesting a marriage to be arranged.

The seven potential candidates you’d selected had the highest compatibility scores from your own assessment of his wants and theirs. All in his preferred age range, some with their natural hair color others with artificially colored hair, even their sexual experience was provided in some detail.

“Your research is extensive,” he comments while reading through the first file. Her name was Yui, first born daughter to a farmer and his wife (who was a former sorcerer) with three younger siblings but no training in jujutsu but the ability to see curses and potential for a cursed technique to have been inherited. Artificial blonde, went to university to study journalism and writes for a gossip magazine with freelance projects on the side. 

Key consideration: terrified of the sight of blood. That note has him closing the folder and setting it to the side to create his own discard pile.

“The world of jujutsu is a picky and particular one. The clans go off of technique, fertility, and strength which makes it easy. Those who don’t have clans arranging or go outside of their clans want much more freedom of choice, and things to choose from.”

“Has someone really turned down a candidate because of their sexual experience?”

“More often than you’d think, in both directions. Why didn’t you like Yui?”

“Being afraid of the sight of blood doesn’t seem to fit right with my profession.” As expected, you write that down in your notebook while your free hand idly stirs your tea. 

“Reckless in combat?”

“No, but I’m not untouchable like Gojo is. Accidents happen, I’d hate to spur my spouse into terror because a bloody shirt was in the washing machine.

You nod, this time lifting one of the small finger sandwiches to your lips as you continue to write. He looks into the next folder, surprised to see this candidate was a sorcerer from overseas looking to move to Tokyo. Céline from Paris, grade two sorcerer without a cursed technique. Her mission record was attached, and Nanami raises an eyebrow at the fact that she’d never completed a mission on her own. That was intriguing, and the notes that followed regarding the reason for denial to be promoted to grade one made it clear why she’d never finished a mission on her own: she was reckless and endangered herself and her colleagues on every mission.

With moving to Tokyo, she doesn’t want to give up being a sorcerer. Ideally would continue down this career path until plans to have children were made and solidified.

With that, Nanami moves Céline into the discard pile as well. He had no interest in a spouse who was recklessly endangering herself and planned on continuing to do so until pregnancy forced her to stop. He wasn’t even certain that he wanted children, and it seemed like she did eventually which was not going to be satisfactory for her. 

The other five files meet the same fate, neatly stacked on the other side of the table while you continue to take notes. You’d added about three more pages on notes while watching him read through files and provide commentary when asked, which showed just how observant you were. This was a profession you excelled at for a reason. 

“Are you normally this picky, Mr. Nanami? This is just a review to see if you want to meet these ladies, not propose on the spot.”

“I don’t want to waste their time or my own if I don’t believe there will be a connection after the meeting. If I don't see a future, why bother?” 

“Should I just let you read through my entire filing cabinet on prospects to see if there’s anyone you like?” You were teasing him, that was clear and made him feel just a bit better about shutting down all of your preliminary choices. But perhaps you expected him to do that, if the additional set of four folders you pulled from the bag sitting on your left meant anything. You truly watched everything that he did.

“That shouldn’t be necessary. You spent the last hour psychoanalyzing me with intentionally incompatible brides for a reason, did you not?”

“Not intentionally incompatible, just incidentally. Everyone is open to options until they have the options, that’s where the pickiness sets in. Everyone has lines they’d prefer not to cross, I needed to find yours to better asses potential partners.”

“What are mine?”

“The most basic one is consistent mutual inconvenience or concern” 

You go on to explain how that spiderwebs into a few other different lines that created his personal boundaries for selecting a wife (and, really, any personal acquaintance). Consistent mutual inconvenience, like him needing to hide a key risk of his profession for a wife terrified of the sight of blood while the wife would need to constantly emotionally prepare for the day where she made contact with the sight of his blood, was not a strong foundation for a relationship. Arranged or not, there needed to be levels of trust and comfortability that could be built, and that comfortability would never be built upon a foundation of fear. That mutual inconvenience webbed into concern, like always being worried that your spouse’s reckless behavior would get themselves killed but they have no desire to quit their job or change their ways would just create exhaustion in the relationship and that wouldn’t be healthy for the marriage. 

If asked, he was definitely reading the words on the paper in his hands and not too captivated by every word that left your mouth to even remember the woman’s name on the page. He had a type, and you were sitting right across from him. It was a shame you weren’t an option. 

A month passes and you’ve finally gotten him to agree to meet with a prospective bride. He had a condition and that was that he got to debrief with you immediately after to share his thoughts and feelings, and you agreed to it without hesitation. Of course Gojo was paying for every minute of your time that Nanami used, so agreeing was a natural decision, but part of him hoped it was a desire to spend that time with him and hear his opinions as more than just a client. 

The prospective bride was named Sayuri. She, like you, had graduated from Jujutsu High’s Kyoto campus and she also, like you, had retired from working as a sorcerer. But with a full stop due to an injury that rendered her cursed technique inoperable, leaving random missions off the table for her own health. 

He appreciated a woman who knew her physical limits, and you looked so proud when he told her that to her face. He was trying, and he was glad that you saw that too, but he knew he’d take the wind out of your sails when he told you that he didn’t see himself with Sayuri for more than just a couple dinner dates. She was nice, truly a lovely girl, but her opinions on teenagers were far too negative while he greatly enjoyed the time he got to spend with the Jujutsu High students (even if they weren’t aware that he enjoyed being around them). As much as they could irritate him, he learned a lot from them but that was a notion that Sayuri just couldn’t accept. He couldn’t accept her as a bride if she would be uncomfortable with Yuuji or Maki stopping in for a visit every now and again. 

Nanami is only slightly disappointed in himself when you deflate at the news. But you also seem more determined to find him a bride, and that brings him relief that you didn’t think he was a lost cause just yet. He would hate to feel as though he’d wasted your time, that was clearly a precious commodity to yourself and other people who desired your services.

“It’s almost like you prefer spending time with me rather than any other women,” you comment off-handedly before leaving, something he knew you meant that as a tease but he dared not tell you it was an accurate assumption. He wanted you to want to continue to be around him, this crush of his would go away once he’d found a suitable arrangement.  

You start to consume his thoughts, the worst part is that he’d been traveling for missions so he hadn’t seen you in weeks. Every day he’s checking his phone for a message from you, his email for new scans of your notes on a prospective spouse, any indication that you were thinking of him just as much as he was thinking of you. It was disgustingly unprofessional to be so distracted, especially when you were simply doing your job that Gojo was paying you to do. To think that you had any sort of feeling for him would be presumptuous, preposterous, and downright idiotic. 

But you never said anything about having a partner of your own, and that gives him a hope that he’s not sure he should have. How could he maintain an air of professionalism when in the back of his head he’s wondering if there was a flavor attached to the glossy shine decorating your lips? 

He lets himself get distracted during his first mission back in Tokyo. The curse wasn’t even a particularly strong one, just annoying, and he let himself get distracted by his phone vibrating in his pocket. He usually put his phone on do-not-disturb when he was on a mission, this time he did not and he had a growing red stain on his shirt to pay for that error. If it was just a text, that’d be one thing. Unfortunately for him it was a call, the vibration strong against his thigh and enough to skew his focus long enough to miss the way the curse lunged at him. Poor performance on his part. 

He was just going to go home after this, enjoy a shower in his own personal bathroom and then check in at the school in the morning. Sleep in his own bed and enjoy being home after six weeks of hotels (as nice as they were). 

Then he checked his phone, listened to the voicemail that you had left and how excited you sounded to have found the one for him. 

He tells the cab driver your address before he even considers going to the school to see Shoko to have his injury treated. He’d rather be dead in an alley than be in the school infirmary for the night, the concrete was definitely going to be more comfortable than the bed there. 

He doesn’t even know what he’d say to you when he knocks on your door. He doesn’t know how you’d react, but he feels better when you open the door and bring him in with just one look at his disheveled state and bring him up the stairs. In all the visits he’d made to your home, this was the first time he’d been up the stairs. 

“What happened?” you ask softly once he’s in your master bathroom, and he sighs as he sits on your toilet per your instruction. The first aid kit is pulled from under the sink, but his attempt to unbutton his shirt is thwarted when you start to do it for him. “Talk to me, Kento.”

“I got distracted while fighting a curse.”

“Distracted? That doesn’t sound like you.” You sound worried, and that makes him feel better about being here. Less imposing, at the very least. “But I guess you’ve been going nonstop for a few weeks. Must’ve been a big distraction.”

“I was only momentarily distracted. A mistake that won’t be repeated.”

“I’m sure,” you murmur, your hands carefully cleaning around the wound in his side. “Y’know, Shoko would be a better doctor considering she actually is one.”

“I can leave, if-”

“No.” Your hand on his chest stops him from trying to stand. “I’d rather you stay, honestly.” 

He relaxes at that, letting his head fall back against the wall with his eyes closed as you continue to work. It wasn’t life threatening by any means, and you were being very gentle with him as you worked to clean up the blood so you could better look at it. 

“Why me, though?”

“I didn’t think much about it. I considered where I felt safe, and you were the first to come to mind.” It’s a vulnerable answer, an honesty he wasn’t prepared to share so openly but you were safe. Always had been. Even with your analyzing gaze and the way you managed to carefully pick apart his guarded exterior, you still felt safe for him. But the way your brow furrowed when he looked down raised a concern. “Is there an issue?”

“No, no issue. You bled a fair amount but that made it look worse than it actually is. You’ll survive until the morning, and Shoko can patch you up properly then.” And he feels the gauze on his skin, your hands applying decent pressure to keep it in place as you start to wrap the bandaging to keep the gauze in place throughout the night. Then your touch is gone, and he sees you standing while carefully removing the gloves that were now stained with his blood. “Pain meds?”

“Please.” He’s letting you pull him to stand, his shirt is now ruined and not worth keeping on but it’d be rude for him to walk around without some sort of covering. This feels indecent when his relationship with you was supposed to be strictly business, like he’s crossing a boundary that wasn’t meant to be crossed - a boundary that he supposed he had crossed when he came to you instead of calling Shoko. He didn’t even know if you had medical training aside from the basic first aid all sorcerers are taught.

“I make you feel safe, huh?”

“You know almost everything about me. More than any of my colleagues who I trust with my life know.” He hears your thoughtful hum in response to his statement, watching as your fingers carefully roll one of the buttons of his undone shirt between them. “So, yes, I feel very safe with you. I enjoy the time we spend together.”

And he doesn’t register how it happens, all he knows is that his lips are on yours and your hands are now gripping his shirt to keep him close while his hands hold your face close to his. Your legs hit the footboard of your bed frame, something that halts him for only a moment before he’s carefully helping you over it while your hands push his shirt off of his shoulders. 

This was not what he had intended when he showed up on your doorstep unannounced and bleeding, but now he knows your lips taste like strawberry and the flavor of your gloss lingers long after you’ve removed it. He knows that you’re not afraid of taking what it is you need, that you had wanted him just as badly as he had wanted you.

But after he’s come down from the moment he lets his brain take over and his anxiety flares. You were supposed to be finding him a suitable spouse, yet here he was in your bed - how could that possibly end? Would you want to help him after he crossed this boundary? Did you want him to stay here with you tonight? Probably not, even if you were sleeping soundly with your head on his arm. So he pulls himself away from you as soon as he’s sure you won’t wake, knowing that he caught sight of a guest bedroom down the hall close to the stairs. He’d sleep there, then make breakfast in the morning. Simple recovery of a situation that he hoped wouldn’t crumble in his hands. 

If you’d been upset by his choice not to sleep in your bed, you don’t show it. The following morning you only greet him with breakfast and let him know that you enjoyed yourself and hoped that he did the same. He left your home to go back to the Jujutsu Tech campus with a kiss on the cheek and mug of coffee to go, with a promise that he'd be in touch to properly go over the notes you'd sent him. 

Then it was back to business. 

Only that business involved more overnight visits, ones where he stayed by your side through the night and went through the motions of the morning with you. Breakfast and coffee, then you both were off to perform your respective jobs. It was odd, sleeping with you then the next day receiving texts about potential candidates. Part of him admired your ability to maintain sight of the goal, the other part wished you’d tell him that you wanted to be with him instead of some random person seeking a husband. He’d miss the intimacy you shared when he finally settled for someone he could live with for the rest of his life - when that would happen, he wasn’t sure.

He just knew it wouldn’t be any time soon. He didn’t want to settle just yet. 

“I found another candidate for you to review,” you mention one evening, your fingers lazily carding through his hair as he relaxes against you. A disinterested hum is all he can bother to respond with, knowing that he was going to find a reason to reject the proposition. He knew what he wanted, and you unfortunately weren’t an option. 

“Would you marry me, Kento?” He’s surprised to hear you ask such a question, lifting his head from where it rests on your chest to see you watching him with a soft smile. “I’m running out of candidates for you to turn down.”

“I didn’t think you were an option,” he murmurs, watching as your shoulders shrug against the mattress. Clearly you didn’t realize that you were an option either until recently. 

“Originally I wasn’t. But now we’ve had sex multiple times, I’m not sure either of us would move on easily.”

Sound logic, he knew he wouldn’t be able to move on at all. Not for months, at a minimum - he really liked you a lot. “Besides, you’re very picky.”

“Do you want to be my wife?”

“I think we would have a very comfortable marriage. Mutually beneficial in many ways. The major bonus is we already like each other.” Again, your logic is sound and he knows that you know that. Why wouldn’t he want to marry you? This was exactly what he was hoping for and thought was unattainable. But you’re smiling up at him, your hand gently caressing his cheek as he watches you for any sign of uncertainty and finds none. “Do you want to be my husband?”

And he knows that he’d be honored to be your husband. You could take care of yourself, but would let him take care of you when needed. You were intelligent, independent, able to act when needed, and understood his work as a sorcerer intimately so you didn’t fear the potential consequences of his career. 

You truly would be the perfect wife, the only downside was that he’d have to thank Gojo for bringing him into your life.

#nanami kento x reader #nanami kento jjk #nanami kento fanfic #nanami kento fluff #nanami kento x you #kento nanami x reader #kento nanami x you #kento nanami imagine #nanami kento imagine #jjk imagines #jjk x reader #jjk x you #jjk fanfic

[caffeiiine]

I read the tags on your Kunikida post… go ahead and explain, my liege

JUST SAW THIS SOMEHOW ABYWAYS TYYY

OKAY so probably going into detail about how kunikida can be considered passively suicidal since i have the most coherent thoughts on that aand warnings for stuff of that nature under the cut :D + length

[also small disclaimer, i have been procrastinating reading dazais entrance exam and so far have only seen the anime adaptation which apparently left a ton of stuff out so feel free to correct me on inaccurate details and/or missed examples or just downright incorrect information]

[note: idk if passive is the correct term bc i was thinking about it and hes not exactly like oh i hope this kills me yk, so whatever that term is lmk <3]

This stuff also sorta ties in with his ideals and their potential self destructive-ness. they tend to cause him to either negligently often risk his life with there being an apparent “other way”, or just outright risk his life with barely a second thought for his ideals.

so kunikida has very strong morals and that’s the core of his character. the main ideals referenced in the show being his infamous “ideal woman”, “how to make dazai ideal”, and the ideal that basically tells him to save people. [i forgot what that one is referred to as]. If we’re talking timeline wise i think one of the first examples of his ideals causing him to negligently risk his life would be in Dazais Entrance Exam, or The Azure Messenger arc if you’re an anime watcher.

First example off the top of my head in dazais entrance exam would be when him and Dazai first see the hostages, specifically the ones in the room

after the gas came down dazai has to actually wrestle kunikida away from the room because otherwise hes gonna die. kunikida repeatedly shouts about how “people shouldn’t die like this”. This might be a bit of a tangent but later on in the episode he remarks how he “may as well ahev set the bomb off himself” when Dazai asks about Rokuzou’s dad, implying he blames himself for Rokuzou’s dad’s death. This is of itself isn’t enough for me to say “oh yeah he’s passively suicidal” so moving on to the main manga where there are several other instances of his tendencies to throw himself directly in harms way.

[there may be examples before this i just skipped to chapter 40] and starting off strong we have the thing with Aya. This could be written up to circumstance but he had the opportunity to avoid death himself so im counting it. he’s basically hugging death. that’s all i have to say for this.

of course he ends up surviving it because of deus ex machina yosano. After the fact, Aya asks him what he would’ve done if Yosano wasn’t there. To which he replies basically he would’ve done the same thing he just did except died and basically would have been fine with the outcome as long as she didn’t die in front of him. [he would’ve been dead as well and not had to deal with the guilt] i should point out as well, he does this because of his ideals. he specifically cites his ideals around these parts usually. The not letting anybody die before his eyes is one of ideals and the most common one he uses.

[im pulling that from the fact he had no backup plans or anything to actually stop the bomb aside from Yosano, since his words could imply he would’ve tried to save Aya. and the guy with the bombs was using the fact Kunikida holds his ideals very close to him, taht he wouldn’t have allowed Aya to die if he could’ve prevented it.]

aaand i think our last example and best example for tonight

context for the scene: they’re in the getaway helicopter and tecchou is trying to take it down via his sword and Kunikida decides to take matters into his own hands and take down Tecchou. First off, HE DID NOT HAVE TO, CHUUYA IS RIGHT. THERE. HE LITERALLY SHOT TECCHOU WITH GRAVITY BULLETS EARLIER.

HE DID NOT HAVE TO RISK HIMSELF BUT HE DID. also additional context, in this arc and the previous arcs, he’s been faced with situation after situation where his ideals have failed him and he’s been unable to exercise them and save the people he thinks he should.

point being, he feels like complete shit! he probably is thinking like if he should do anything then, it should be he makes sure he gets his friends out of there. regardless of whether he’s dead or alive because he jumps out of the plane and full body tackles tecchou while being in direct contact with fucking chuuya.

chuuya “has to stay out of the fights and arcs half the time because he’s too good at his job” nakahara.

chuuya “just shot tecchou and did a decent job at keeping him back a few pages before” nakahara. you see my point.

oh and then he just attempts to blow the both of them up.

he does not care for his life at all here. not one bit. also he did not need to blow the both of them up. he could’ve made a fucking stun gun or anything else that wouldn’t KILL the BOTH of them??

my whole point is he does not care for his life here and it’s gets worse the more you progress through the manga.

anyways anyways ending off, kunikida repeatedly puts his life in danger either for his ideals or neglectfully and/or without need. this has been a ramble. this man is not okay.

also kinda funny is he’s partners with dazai of all people, actively suicidal princess bungou himself. i really enjoy their differences and how similarly different they are.

^ not actually related to anything but i almost started laughing so hard with my family in the room at this piece, junichiro looks so concerned

#good god this was a ton #i hope this was coherent #i most likely missed some stuff unfortunately sobs and there’s probably a contradiction or two in here im not proofreading this #ANYWAYS TYSM FOR ASKUNG #sodaramblestoomuch #bsd #soda ask and answers! #bungou stray dogs #bungo stray dogs #bsd kunikida #bsd analysis #bsd manga #bsd spoilers #bungou stray dogs kunikida #kunikida doppo #bsd doppo kunikida #doppo kannonzaka #kunikida bsd #doppo kunikida #bungou sd #bungo sd #bungou gay dogs

[pizzaboerr]

From nothing to something.

(Sanji x reader, part 2)

part 1

Summary: You joined the crew, ready for the new adventure you are about to go on. The first thing you wanted to do was to get to know everyone a little better, seeing who you were dealing with.

Word count: 2,9K words.

Content warnings: Use of curse words, slight use of alcohol and cigarettes.

Authors note: Thank you for the support on the first part. I’m very grateful for that. If you haven’t read the first part, feel free to read it!

P.S.: Sorry if there are sentences that are grammatically incorrect, English isn’t my first language, so my apologies in advance.

~~—~~—~~—~~

It was a 15 minute walk from your tiny house to the docks. You saw a few ships but they didn’t seem like the one you were looking for. The sun was already setting and you looked at the sunset for a second. You smiled and took a deep breath.

After a few minutes you started walking again and kept looking at the ships. You didn’t really see where you were going and before you knew it, you bumped into someone, making you fall onto the ground.

“Oh Shit, i’m so sorry!” You started saying while looking up at the person who you bumped into, seeing the green-haired guy looking at you, not amused at all. He mumbled something you didn’t understand and he held out a hand. “Watch where you are going.” You nodded and grabbed his hand. “Thank you.” You quickly said before you grabbed your stuff from the ground.

The green-hair guy lifted you up and soon enough you were standing again. He nodded and walked off.

‘What a weird guy.’ You thought before you began to walk again. After you walked for a bit until you saw a Jolly Roger with a skull and a straw hat on. You chuckled and laughed. “Why doesn’t this surprise me?” You asked yourself before you tried to see if you could see anyone.

You started to doubt yourself and was ready to walk away, until you heard someone scream your name. You turned around and saw the captain of the crew Luffy. He jumped off the ship, right in front of you. “So what do you say?” Luffy asked excitedly. “Yeah, I want to be part of the crew!” You reacted with the same amount of excitement.

He hugged you and after that, threw your bag onto the ship. You laughed at the action and smiled. “After you y/n.” Luffy said, pointing at the opening of the ship. You looked at the ship for a second, smiled and entered the ship.

Once you entered the ship, you started to look around. You saw some tangerine trees and smiled. “What a nice touch” you said softly while you walked up to them and took a closer look. You tried to touch one before someone grabbed your arm, which caused you to turn around.

“What the hell do you think you are doing here!” The same green-haired guy said angrily. “How the fuck did you do that?” You just asked confused, totally not frightened by the guy or the 3 swords he had. “I could ask you the same fucking thing. Get off this ship. You don’t belong here waiter.”

Luffy heard what was going on and came to check on you. “Zoro calm down, she’s part of our crew!” He said excitedly. Zoro looked shocked, but not really surprised. “So the cook was right about something.” He huffed and let go of your arm. He walked away, presumably to his room.

“Off to a great start.” You mumbled, before smiling and turning around. You saw the other boy and girl walk up to you and they introduced themself. “I’m the great captain Ussop.” Ussop started proudly. Nami laughed at Ussop and she quickly introduced herself, Following Zoro shortly after.

“The great captain Ussop you say?” You smiled slightly. Luffy was still standing there just taking it all in. “Yes! Finally someone who acknowledges me.” He smiled widely. “So captain, tell me. Why is Luffy the captain and why are you also a captain?” You tried to stay serious but smiled slightly. He was slightly taken aback but laughed it off.

“W-well you see.-“ He started to explain and Luffy laughed loudly, he couldn’t wait for Ussop to explain it to you. “Luffy couldn’t do this without me. See i’m a great sharp shooter and because of that, an amazing addition to this crew.” You nodded. “I see, well good to have you on the crew Captain Ussop.” You patted him on the shoulder and took a look at Luffy, who was now grabbing his stomach because he was laughing so hard.

“Luffy, can you maybe show me around?” You asked Luffy while you walked up to him. “No, I can’t but there is someone who can.” He grabbed your arm and pulled you into the ship, to the kitchen. You quickly looked back at Ussop who just held up both thumbs and mouthed something like ‘Goodluck’.

~~—~~—~~—~~

You entered the kitchen after Luffy, who was still holding on to your arm, basically dragging you along. You noticed that everyone (except Ussop, who was still outside) was in the kitchen, chatting away. When they saw you it all got quiet. Sanji tried to avoid eye contact and started chopping some vegetables and fruits.

“So anyone wants to show y/n around?” Luffy asked. Zoro looked at you and shook his head while slightly grinning. “Well I know someone whats to show her around. Maybe show her-“ He got rudely interrupted by Sanji who threw an apple core directly in between his eyes. Zoro got up and was ready to fight him at this point.

You were shocked by this but found this oddly amusing, quickly glancing at Nami who was now crying from laughter.

“Great! Who were you talking about Zoro?” Luffy asked, totally oblivious of the situation. You saw Zoro laugh and pointed at Sanji, who ignored Zoro and continued chopping up the remaining vegetables and fruits. “Awesome! We’ll leave you two too it.” Luffy said happily, Grabbing Zoro and Nami, leaving you two alone.

You were silent for a second, just looking at Sanji who was finishing up with the preparations for dinner. After what you felt was like eternity, you cleared your throat. “So..-“ You started off slowly. Sanji looked up and smiled. “I’m so sorry for Mosshead earlier. Hope he didn’t make a wrong impression.” He started, while he washed his hands.

“Yeah, no it’s fine. I’m used to a alot-“ You smiled. “u-uh from the restaurant of course.” You hit yourself, embarrassed at how stupid that sounded and heard Sanji laugh softly. “Please mademoiselle, don’t hurt yourself.” Sanji said as he dried his hands and walked over to you.

You felt your hart skip a beat and froze for a second. ‘Damn you are such a loser. Already crushing on the first (handsome) man that is nice to you.’ You thought to yourself while trying to play it cool. Sanji definitely noticed this but ignored it for now, trying not to act like a fool.

“Madam?” Sanji asked while he waved his hands in front of your face, smiling. You looked at him sheepishly before your cheeks turned a rosy pinkish colour. “I’m sorry, you were saying?” You asked trying to sound chill, but definitely failing.

Sanji let out a chuckle, enjoying the situation you created. “As I was saying Madam, Are you ready for me to show you around?” He asked while looking at you, his eyes shifting from your eyes to your lips and back to your eyes again. You just nodded. He smiled widely before he clapped his hands together. “Let’s get started Mi amore.” He walked to the door and held it open for you. You nodded and walked out of the door.

He grabbed your bag like the gentleman he is and started off showing you everything you needed to know, giving you random and stupid facts about all the rooms he was showing you. Now and then you let out a chuckle as he said something funny, or in your opinion, cute.

“And last but definitely not least; This is Nami and your room.” He opened the door and you saw two beds in a regular sized room. There were a few barrels, a few cabinets, a hammock and a chair. You smiled at Sanji while he placed your bag into the room. “Well, I’ll leave you to it for now, If you need anything Mademoiselle you know where to find M- u uh- us. I’ll call you for dinner in a bit.” Sanji said quickly, smiled at you and left.

~~—~~—~~—~~

You were in your shared room quite a while before Nami knocked on the door. “I’m coming in.” She said before she opened the door and looked at you. “Hi-“ You started while you turned around to look back at her. “You know, this was your room first so you don’t have to knock, but I very much appreciate it nonetheless.” You said kindly.

You were still busy unpacking, not fully knowing where to put everything. The floor was now filled with all of your stuff and you sat in the middle of it. Nami chuckled at the sight and carefully walked around all of the stuff and sat on her bed.

“Look, I’m not the best person to make friends but you seem nice. With that said, here are some rules. First, you don’t touch my stuff, Second, this cabinet is full of my maps but you can store important books or maps in here if you need to. Third, you can ask me anything and I’ll try to help you wherever I can.” You smiled. This solved 90% of your storage problems. “Thank you Nami.” You said happily, while putting everything away and sitting down on your bed.

You both talked for a bit about everything and nothing before you heard Sanji call for the both of you. “About time.” You said but it came out more as a whisper. Nami laughed, before standing up and looking at you. “Be prepared y/n. The food at your restaurant is nothing compared to the food Sanji makes, especially now that you are here.” She grinned and walked away. You followed her, confused at what she just told you.

You entered the kitchen after Nami, seeing Sanji handing every one their plate. He smiled widely when he saw you which made you blush slightly and quickly sat down in between Nami and Zoro. Sanji handed Nami her plate and then placed your plate in front of you. “Here you go madam, tell me what you think.” He looked at you once again, slightly blushing himself but luckily no one noticed.

You took a bite and closed your eyes with pleasure. “This is amazing.” You said once you swallowed the food. Sanji smiled to himself and nodded proudly. “Thank you.” He said. “Sanji you did it again! This is amazing!” Luffy shouted with a mouth full of meat, grabbing a few more pieces. This caused everyone to laugh.

Everyone enjoyed their food and chatted away. You actually started a conversation with Zoro, about his swords and he smiled slightly. “Well-“ Zoro started off, starting a full hour talk about each sword. You just looked fascinated and whole heartedly listened along.

Nami, Luffy and Usopp all left after dinner, leaving Zoro, Sanji and you behind in the kitchen. Zoro got two beers and gave you one as well, which you took gladly. You looked at Sanji who was now smoking and was cleaning in silence.

Zoro asked you about why you really wanted to join the crew. You smiled sadly. “Well, I’m here all on my own, my parents left when I just turned 16. They probably thought it would be better for me to stay here. I worked at the restaurant the past three years and I’ve always had a passion for the Grand line. I never really imagined going away from this place, mainly because it’s not really possible for me to go alone. Then you all came along and Luffy gave me an offer I could not resist, so here I am.” You chuckled slightly at the end of your sentence.

After a few beers and a long conversation, Zoro stood up and stretched. “I’m going to take a shower and head to bed. Welcome to the crew waiter.” He said to you. “Cook.” He mumbled as he left with his remaining beer.

You looked over at Sanji who just finished cleaning everything and was now sweeping the floor. You sighed. “Waiter, what a stupid nickname.” You mumbled towards Sanji. He looked at you and laughed. “Yeah, he is not really original with nicknames. He tends to call me Cook, as you just heard.” He said nervously, not really knowing how to react towards you.

You rested both of your arms on the table you were sitting at and rested your head on them. You didn’t really reply to what he was saying and just kept looking at him. “You need any help?” You asked him after a while. “No i’m good. Thank you Mademoiselle. Pretty girls shouldn’t do cleaning jobs anyway.” He said turning away from you, to hide his blush.

You grabbed the mop and made a soap mixture for the floor. “Well in that case I will get started with mopping the floor.” You said teasingly. Sanji sighed and turned to you. “You’re very stubborn love.” He smiled soflty.

You mopped the floor in silence, just like in the restaurant. It never got awkward between you and Sanji, as if you guys knew each other for an eternity. You were completely in thoughts when you bumped into him. You quickly turned around facing him. You looked around you and saw that you worked in circles and worked your way towards the middle of the room, meaning you were stuck there. You could of course mop behind you as you walk but that’s just extra work.

He laughed and looked around, seeing exactly what you were seeing. “Good job Mademoiselle.” He jumped up the counter and sat down. He patted the place next to him, motioning you should sit next to him. You copied him, while mopping the remainder of the floor and looked at him sheepishly. “Yeah, this was definitely my plan, I knew what I was doing.” You said confidently. He laughed loudly and nodded. “If you wanted to spend more time with me sweetheart, you could’ve asked me.” He said shooting you a smile and biting the inside of his lip.

“Yeah right. So you wanna stay here for a while and talk?” You said stupidly, causing him to laugh. “Ah, Yes definitely, I don’t have anywhere to go anyways.” He said that gesturing to the wet floor. You laughed along and looked around. “So.. How did you become part of the crew?” You asked him, looking at him curiously.

He started to explain the whole situation, from being on the ship while he was still young, to being stuck with Zeff on a rock. “Zeff taught me all that I need to know and I joined this crew, looking for the all blue.” He said smiling weakly. You looked at him confused. “T-the all blue, what is that?” You fully turned to him. Your legs were now touching his side.

His eyes lit up. “The all blue? The all blue is a legendary place where fish from all four seas — the East Blue, the West Blue, the South Blue, the North Blue — all meet. It’s a paradise for a chef like me.” He got really excited and grabbed a book from the cabinet beneath him. He opened it up and showed you all the different kind of fish and you just smiled at him, affectionately.

He looked back at you while explaining everything, seeing that you were actually interested and didn’t think it was boring. His cheeks turned a bright pink colour and he cleared his throat.

You saw this and smiled. “You okay there?” You asked slowly, but kinda teasingly. He looked at the ground. “Look at that, the ground is dry. It was really nice to talk to you mademoiselle but I have to leave.” He got up and rushed out of the kitchen, leaving you alone.

You sighed deeply and left after a second, going back to your shared room.

~~—~~—~~—~~

You opened the door and took a look inside, seeing Nami looking over at a few maps. “Ah just in time!” She smiled. Can you help me figure something out?” Nami asked while she gestured you to come closer. You took a look at the maps and helped her.

It was now late at night, so after Nami and you talked for a bit. Nami and you got ready first bed and you looked at her one more moment. “Nami can I ask you something?” You asked slowly. “Yeah, shoot.” She said, still with her eyes closed.

“What the fuck is going on with Sanji?” One moment he is really nice, and the second he runs off. I just don’t get it.” You explained confusingly, moving your hands around.

Nami laughed and moved over to her side, now facing you. “Look y/n, I can’t explain why he’s acting a certain way“ She started. “-But I can say that you are a really nice person, and yeah, he’s Sanji.” She was now fully grinning. You looked at her, once again very confused. Nami turned around. “Goodnight y/n. You’ll figure it out soon enough.”

With that she dimmed the lights and you were left in complete darkness, feeling confused about not only what was going on with Sanji but about your feelings towards this cook as well.

#vinsmoke sanji #one piece sanji #sanji x reader #usopp #nami #roanoa zoro #monkey d. luffy #one piece

[iamumbra195]

Random Incorrect Quotes and Vibes from the Bleach AU I will probably never write (Rukia is killed by Aizen and them in the SS arc)

----

Ichigo: *feral teenager with slightly cat-like tendencies because of his hollow*

Shinji: 

Sakanade in his head: M I N E

...

Shinji: *explaining the inner hollow and everything that happened with Aizen and how they trained their hollows*

Ichigo: *a nerd who likes literarture and knows exactly what werewolves are*

Ichigo: Can I say something--

Shinji: *has questioned his reality more than once because of this kid’s weird questions* NO--

...

Ichigo: *goes to his inner world to see why the fuck Shiro is constantly screaming in his ear*

Shiro: *leaning over his body omniously with his big smile because he has been seperated from Ichigo for so long and this is the first time they’ve interacted without Old Man Zangetsu getting in the way so he’s happy*

Ichigo: wtfwtfwtf--

...

Shiro: *a feral tiny cat that likes to fight too much*

Sakanade: *a feral big cat the puts him in air jail*

Benihime: *the sadistic instigator*

....

Karin: *snooping through Ichigo’s room because she’s worried and finds Rukia’s asauchi*

Karin: *touching Rukia’s sword after Ichigo told her what happened and feeling a weird jolt or reiatsuand urge to keep it*

Ichigo: *who felt the reiatsu* ...

Karin:...

Karin: I have been CHOSEN--

Ichigo: NO--

...

Ichigo: What do you have there?

Karin: A Zanpakuto!

Ichigo: NO!

...

Karin: *facing a hollow while Ichigo was at the SS and losing*

Kangetsu (her Zanpakuto): cAN YoU hEAr mE?

...

Hitsugaya: *looks vaguely like her Zanpakuto spirit*

Karin: *softly* Holy shit

...

Ichigo: Goodnight moon.

Ichigo: Goodnight tree. Ichigo: Goodnight ghosts that only I can see.

...

Karin: Is stabbing someone immoral?

Isshin: *Joking* Not if they consent to it

Ichigo: *Serious* Depends on who you’re stabbing

Yuzu: *the one sane non-soul reaper in the family* YES?!

...

Ichigo: *walking into his room* Hello people who do not live here

Renji: Hey

Ikkaku: Hi

Yumichika: Hello

Rangiku: Hey!

Ichigo: You’re only supposed to come here for emergencies!

Renji: We were out of Doritos *they’re on a mission, he’s just fucking with him*

...

Orihime: I impulsively bought a snake, what do I name hime?

Ishida: *scared of snakes* You did WHAT--

Ichigo: William Snakespeare

...

Renji: *while they were going to save Rukia* This is such a bad idea

Ichigo: Then why are you coming along?

Renji: One of us needs to be able to talk the Gotei out of arresting us when this goes wrong

...

Ichigo: Do you think I can fit fifteen marshmallows in my mouth?

Ishida: You’re a hazard to society

Renji: And a coward. Do twenty

...

Orihime: If I were a drink, I’d be a strawberry vanilla coke. If you were a drink, what would you be?

Ichigo: Bleach (PUN FULLY INTENDED XD)

Keigo: *he found out ichigo and Chad didn’t fail like him* Sewage

Orihime: *concern*

Tatsuki: Calm down edgelords

...

Okay, that’s it

Some of these were canon, some of these were just random shit from my fic that i might never write

#bleach #incorrect bleach quotes #ichigo kurosaki #hollow ichigo #renji abarai #shinji hirako #karin kurosaki #isshin kurosaki #yuzu kurosaki #uryu ishida #orihime inoue #kisuke urahara #asano keigo #tatsuki arisawa #soul reapers #gotei 13 #crack

[blueteller]

So, I discovered the "random incorrect quotes generator" and had some fun with it. Here you go 😂

Alberu: So. Choi Han and I were crossing the street, and this dude drove by and honked at us Cale: *sighs* …What did Choi Han do? Alberu: He chased him to the next red light, then reached into his window and… Choi Han: *smiles innocently* Do you need a steering wheel, Cale-nim?

Cale: We need to get through this locked door. Bud, give me your money Bud: …Ok, here? Cale: *pockets it* Thanks. Choi Han, kick down the door Bud: …

Eruhaben: While I'm gone - Raon, you're in charge. Raon: Yes!!! Eruhaben: *whispers* On, you're the one actually in charge. On: *whispers back* Obviously.

Basen: Where's Lily? She isn't answering Violan: I'll call Basen: Father and I have both tried six times ea- Violan: Lily! Lily: *in distance* Yes?

Cale: What's a word thats a mix between 'sad' and 'mad'? Choi Han: Disgruntled, miserable, desolated- Raon: Smad! Cale & Choi Han: … (How can he be so cute)

Tasha: Alberu, tell Mary about the birds and the bees Mary: *stares silently* Alberu: *sweats* Alberu: …They're disappearing at an alarming rate

Cale: What doesn't kill me should run, because now I'm f***ing pissed Gods: *shiver* (Why do I hear boss music-?)

On: Dandelions symbolize everything I want to be in life Raon: Fluffy and dead with a gust of wind? On: Unapologetic. Hard to kill. Feral, filled with sunlight, bright, beautiful in a way that the conventional and controlling hate but cannot ever fully destroy. Stubborn. Happy. Bastardous. Friends with bees. Highly disapproving of lawns. Full of wishes that will be carried far after I die. Hong: …edible! Cale: *shivers in the distance*

Cale: Would you stab your best friend in the leg for 10 billion gallons? Choi Han: *thinks carefully* If you stabbed me, you could just heal me with a potion, and then we could buy another big-a** villa somewhere Clopeh: *enthusiastic* You could stab me too, and then you'd have 20 billion! Choi Han: *pulls out his sword with a smile* …Good thinking

*Archie and Paseton sitting in jail together* Paseton: So, who should we call for help? Archie: …I'd call Cale, but I think I feel safer in jail

Rasheel: *sarcastic* How petty can you get? Mila: *smiling* I once edited historical documents to win an argument I was wrong about Rasheel: *scared* What the f-

Alberu: ...You know those things will kill you, right? Eruhaben: *pouring himself a glass of vodka* That's the point. Choi Han: *smoking 10 cigarettes at once* We're trying to speed up the process. Cale: *nods while eating raw cookie dough*

Witira: You have to apologize to Paseton Archie: …Fine. Archie: 'Unf*** you', or whatever

Cale: Looking left cause you don't treat me right Choi Han: Looking right because you left Raon: Looking up cause you let me down Alberu: Looking down cause you f***ed up White Star: *bleeding from having his arm ripped off* …What is wrong with you guys??

Alberu: *walks into his bedroom* …Hello, people who do not live here. Cale: Hey. Choi Han: Hello. Raon: Hi cookie prince! Hong: *chewing* Alberu: You know I gave you the key to my place for emergencies only, right? On: *shrugs* We were out of cookies

Cale: I've come to a point in my life where I need a stronger word than 'f***' Raon: Human, you poopy dumbo!! Cale: … Cale: …that works, I guess

Alberu: Instructor-nim, why do you always wear black? Choi Han: So that when someone points at your black clothes and asks whose funeral it is, having a look around the room and saying 'Haven't decided yet' is a valid response. Alberu: *thoughtfully* Hm. I should try that at the next nobles meeting

Shapeshifter: *transforms to look like Eruhaben* Eruhaben: *hairflips* Fool, are you blind? You look nothing like me. First off, I'm taller. Secondly, I DO NOT look so sleep deprived. Also, if you could drag comb through that hair you would be a 7 at most, everyone knows I'm a constant 10-

Raon: Human, you'll have a hard time believing this because it never happens - but it seems I made a mistake! Cale: *sighs* ...What did you do this time?

Deruth: You see, children, nothing in life is free- Lily: Love is free! Basen: Knowledge is free Violan: Artistic inspiration is free Cale: *smirks* Everything is free if you simply loot it

White Star: I learned some very valuable lessons from this. Sheritt: I'm guessing they are all horrible distortions on the lessons you actually should've taken away. White Star: Death isn't real, and I'm basically God.

(Cage remix) Cage: *drinking* I learned some very valuable lessons from this. Taylor: ...I'm guessing they are all horrible distortions on the lessons you actually should've taken away? Cage: Death isn't real, and neither is God God of Death: *sobbing in the distance*

Deruth: Cale… just how many kids do you have? Cale: …Biologically, emotionally, or legally? Deruth: 0_0

#tcf #trash of the count's family #lcf #lout of the count’s family #humor #tcf humor #incorrect quotes #incorrect tcf #crack #tcf crack

[wolfieldos]

Icorect PJO/HOO quotes from this website :https://perchance.org/incorrect-quote-generator

Thalia: You seem familiar, have I threatened you before?

--------

Nico: The only thing keeping me from running away and hiding from society for the rest of my life is spite. I could disappear forever, but there are some bitches whose downfalls I have yet to witness, and I wanna be around when that happens.

-------

Percy: So according to the cease and desist order I got, apparently you can’t ‘legally’ be a lawyer if your license is ‘cut out of a cereal box’.

--------

Percy: Pros and cons of dating me. Percy: Pros. You'll be the cute one. Percy: Cons. Holy shit, where do I begin-

------

Grover: Yum, thanks!

Kidnapper: *puts more tape over their mouth* I said stop eating it.

-------

Nico: My aesthetic is "would be suspected of witchcraft by small town citizens."

-------

Annabeth in TLT

Annabeth: *trying to buy a Father's Day card at Hallmark*

Annabeth: Excuse me, do you have any that just say "You are my dad?"

Associate: Well, I-

Annabeth: How about "You banged my mom?"

Associate: No...

Annabeth: You know what, I'll just get a blank one.

Annabeth: *writes* You are a father. This is a day. Here is a card.

--------

Leo: I'm a firm believer in "if you're going to fail, you might as well fail spectacularly."

------

Nico: You can't wake up if you never get to sleep.

-------

Piper, opening a Capri Sun: Guess I'll drink my sorrows away.

-------

Hazel: War is heck!

------

Jason: I have yet to encounter a problem where a sword didn't factor into the solution at least in some way.

------

Frank: Well, needless to say. Uh-oh Spaghetti-os.

-------

Will: Can we go to a haunted house?

Nico: What’s wrong with the one we live in?

Will: Wh-what?

Nico: Goodnight, Will.

-------

Percy: Shouldn't get stressed out, it's not good for the baby.

Annabeth: What baby?

Percy, crying a bit: Me.

--------

*The Squad is playing Chess*

Annabeth: *easily beats everyone because they know how to play*

Piper: *doesn’t know the rules, but wins anyway*

Leo: *doesn’t know the rules, and loses*

Jason: *knows the rules, but still loses to those who don’t*

Frank: Actually, you can’t do that, because I said so.

Percy: They named a board game after cheese?

--------

*when the Squad drops food*

Annabeth: Eh, oh well.

Piper: FIVE-SECOND RULE!

Nico: FUCK!

Jason: *just gets more food*

Percy: *drops to their knees and mourns the food*

Leo: *eats the food off the ground*

---------

Leo: Who else is hiding in the laundry room trying to listen to Hazel and Frank's convo?

Piper: Me. I'm in the laundry basket.

Percy: I'm in the washing machine.

Nico: I'm in the closet.

Jason: We accept you Nico. <3

Nico: No I'm literally in the closet.

Jason: Love is love. <3

--------

Frank: Are you trying to give me a frickin’ aneurysm?

Percy: Pretty sure we all are.

Hazel: I wasn't.

Leo: I was.

Jason: I was trying to stop them, for your consideration.

Nico: I just cause aneurysms naturally.

--------

Annabeth: Okay, I’m going to get the wedding cake.

Percy: Perfect, while you do that I’ll check on the ring bear.

Annabeth: ...

Annabeth: You mean ring bearER, right?

Percy: ...

Annabeth: Look me in the eyes and tell me you are not going to bring a dangerous wild animal to our wedding.

---------

Nico: I don't need to go to bed. I'm not tired, I'll be fine.

Will: But, darling, I'll be so lonely without you. Come curl up in my arms so I can feel whole again.

Nico: O-oh. Well. Are you trying to seduce me into healthy sleeping patterns??

Will: Is it working?

-------

BONUS MAGNUS CHASE

Mallory: Nothing in life is free.

Sam: Love is free.

T.J: Knowledge is free.

Alex: Friendship is free.

Halfborn: Self-respect is free.

Magnus: Everything's free if you don't pay for it.

The Squad: ...

T.J: Magnus, that's illegal-

Alex: No, let them finish!

sooooooo yep. Hope you enjoyed

#Pjo #Hoo #heroes of olympus #percy jackon and the olympians #Percy Jackson #Annabeth Chase #Jason Grace #Piper Mclean #Leo Valdez #hazel levesque #frank zhang #mcga #Magnus Chase and the gods of asgard #Magnus Chase #alex fierro #Mallory keen #samirah al abbas #Thomas Jefferson Jr #halfborn gunderson

[rambheem-is-real]

Dying, Craving, For You Baby Part 1

title inspired by @magicaldragons's edit using the song, fic inspired by some convos in the varadeva server

warnings: NSFW, threesome where two characters are the same person

Pre-Ceasefire Varadha falls through time, to the exact moment Deva is brought to his future self in 2017. Smut ensues.

-

“Everyone, out.” Karta Varadha orders, and with a little hesitation, the soldiers, the guards, and even Baba shuffle out of the room. 

Varadha just lifts his chin higher, already mentally calculating what the karta’s weak points might be in a fight. He won’t let that man intimidate him. 

Karta Varadha pushes himself up from the throne, slow and deliberate in a way that Varadha had never seen Raja Mannar act. In fact, it reminds him of the few years he spent watching his grandfather. He had heard the rumors, the whispers from the elderly folk around the city, that he looked like a spitting image of his grandfather. Varadha hadn’t seen the comparison when he was ten, but now he can see it clearly. The aura of a leader, the sheer power in his every step downwards from the throne, he had never seen that in his father.

There’s still a coil of tension, a nervousness in Karta Varadha that only Varadha can sense, and only because he knows himself better than anyone else, but the vulnerability has increased. Whatever happened to put Karta Varadha on that throne, it clearly had lasting consequences on his mental state.

Karta Varadha makes his way over to Deva, who’s standing still, looking smaller than Varadha had ever seen him. There’s a glint in Karta Varadha’s eyes that Varadha doesn’t like, promising violence. 

For a second, Varadha’s back in the pit, watching Naarang advance on Deva. No, Varadha thinks. He won’t let his future self hurt Deva, no matter what had happened between them. 

Varadha quickly puts himself between Deva and Karta Varadha, who stops. There’s clear displeasure in every line of his face, and his eyes are stony. 

“What are you doing?” The karta asks, low and dangerous. “I’m protecting what’s mine,” Varadha says. He feels Deva suck in a breath behind him, and he can very well imagine the look of adoration Deva might be sending his back right now. No one can come between him and his Deva, not even his future self. 

“Is that so?” The Karta muses, and his mouth curves up in a slow smirk. 

Something’s wrong, Varadha can feel it. He and Deva, if they fought together? They could move even the heavens themselves. And Karta Varadha should know that as well. Why was he still so smug? 

Karta Varadha tilts his head, addressing Deva behind him. “Deva, come here.”

Varadha scoffs. “As if he’s just going to come when you call….” he trails off, watching in confusion and horror as Deva steps around him, moving to meet Karta Varadha face to face. “Deva!” he calls out, trying to project confidence. “We can take him together.” Varadha grips his sword through his sheath, readying himself for any plan Deva might have. 

Karta Varadha is still smiling up at Deva, not breaking eye contact. “He seems to have a rather incorrect view of the situation. Right, Deva?”

Deva doesn’t nod, but he doesn’t move away or refute it either. 

Varadha hates seeing Deva like this. What happened? To make the fiery man who had protected him, and he had protected in turn, be so… submissive?

Quick as lightning, Karta Varadha grips Deva’s throat. Varadha yells and draws his sword, but Deva just… isn’t… moving. He’s not fighting the grip, not doing.. anything.

“Deva, what?” Some of his desperation must have leaked through his voice, because Deva turns his head to look at Varadha. There’s both hope and helplessness warring in his eyes, and Varadha hates it. For the first time in his life, Varadha can’t tell what his beloved is thinking. 

Perhaps because Deva’s attention is now on Varadha, the other man drops the smile. “He’s not yours, Varadha.” Karta Varadha hisses. “He’s mine.” He turns back to Deva, and presses harder. 

Varadha’s about to give up the stalemate and attack first when he hears the moan. He almost drops his sword when he realizes that it had come from Deva, when Karta Varadha had choked him harder. 

Karta Varadha gives Varadha that same smirk once more. “See? He’s mine.”

You’ve gone insane, is what Varadha wants to say to that, but the other man strokes Deva’s face and he’s forced to watch Deva melt into the touch. 

Varadha’s face goes hot. Even when he had brought Deva, his Deva, to Khansaar, he hadn’t dared to tell him about his feelings, the childhood crush that had somehow turned into an all consuming love that had helped sustain Varadha through his darkest days. Nor had he wanted to tell Deva about the fantasies he’d touched himself to over the years, feeling guilty every time he came to what he imagined Deva’s voice would sound like, what Deva’s hands would feel like roaming over him. 

And here this future version of himself was, looking at Deva as if he wanted to devour him whole, and Deva was letting him. 

“He’ll do anything I tell him to.” Karta Varadha says, and pulls Deva into an open mouthed kiss. 

Varadha watches, heat pulsing through him, as Karta Varadha licks into Deva’s mouth. He slowly sheaths his sword, realizing that there was no threat to Deva’s life as he initially had thought. There’s an uncomfortable pressure in his lower regions, as he watches his future self move his hands to Deva’s slim waist. 

“Deva,” he tries to call out again, because he needs to know, he needs-

Karta Varadha pulls back, and Deva whines, trying to chase the other man’s lips with his own. Karta Varadha winks at Varadha, as if to say, here, doesn’t that prove Deva wants this? and goes back to kissing Deva. 

Fuck. Varadha’s fucked. He can’t deny his attraction to what’s going on anymore, and moves closer to the duo, breathing hard. 

He can’t believe that Deva of all people is attracted to him, or at least a future version of him. What had happened after the ceasefire, to make Deva and the karta so comfortable with each other? 

Is he welcome here, then? Varadha gently brushes his fingers against Deva’s, testing the waters. 

Deva immediately breaks the kiss, and stares at him. Varadha stares back, silently asking permission. 

Deva shakes his head, and Varadha’s world crashes. He immediately withdraws his fingers, about to apologize, when he hears Deva. 

“You don’t even know what happened,” Deva whispers, guilt in his face and in his voice. “I hurt you, I hurt your family. I killed-”

“You’re still my Deva,” Varadha says, and oh, he understands Karta Varadha now. Deva is always his, no matter what. 

“If.. if you don’t want me here, I understand,” Varadha says. “But if you won’t let yourself be with me, then I’m going to call bullshit.” 

Deva’s still for a second, then pulls Varadha into a kiss, holding his face. It’s sweet and gentle, contrasting with the filthy way Karta Varadha had been kissing Deva earlier. Varadha sends a quick prayer to Kaateramma before he loses himself in the sensation of Deva, thanking her for whatever brought him to this time. 

It feels like no time has passed before Deva pulls back, and Varadha can’t control his bashful grin as he looks into Deva’s blushing face. 

All too soon he remembers the third person in the room, and he turns to see Karta Varadha frowning at the two of them. Varadha is a little more familiar with the man to recognize the jealousy and heartbreak he can see in his eyes. 

“He’s ours,” Varadha says, firmly. 

“What,” Karta Varadha says, incredulous, “you’re proposing we share him?”

“Why not?” Varadha asks. He turns to look at Deva, whose eyes are wide following the exchange. “You said it yourself. Deva will do anything we tell him to.” And he thinks he understands this Deva now as well. He’s desperate for Varadha, will take any version of him he’ll get, even if that Varadha hates him. 

“All right,” the karta says, clearly thinking it over and liking the idea. To Varadha’s confusion, he turns and walks back up the stairs. Karta Varadha settles on his throne (lounging in a frankly indecent way if you ask Varadha) and looks at them expectantly.

“What?” Varadha asks. “Why are you up there?”

Deva sucks in a breath next to him, as he realizes something, and then chuckles. “Aatagaadive, raa nuvvu [I didn’t realize you were such a playboy].”

The meaning of the words hits Varadha, and he stares up at the karta. 

“Entertain me,” Karta Varadha says. 

“We-” Varadha’s protests are cut off by Deva kissing him once again, and at first the angle is awkward as Deva’s still grinning against his lips. He realizes that Deva is enjoying this, enjoying putting on a show for Varadha’s future self, and suddenly Varadha isn’t annoyed anymore. 

If the karta wants a show, he’ll get a show.

-

tags: @deadloverscity @sambaridli @sometimesbrave @just-a-lazy-person @vijayasena @mad-who-ra @umbrulla @jitterbugbetty @pitrsattabhaadmeinjao @sinistergooseberries @tulodiscord @varadevaficrecs @hum-suffer @nini9224 @varadevlawyer @looseukitty @astraswades @seokminded @magicaldragons

#salaar #varadeva #salaar fic #time travel fic!! #always wanted to write one of these

[charons-ships]

A New Ember

Pairings: Mizu x Akemi

Summary: Mizu is back, and she breaks into Akemi's room to warn her about a new threat. There's bad blood, tension, and confusing feelings.

A/N: This is my first fanfic! If you like my incorrect quotes, maybe you'll like this!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Akemi should be sleeping, but the fire that destroyed Edo still burned within her. All should be dark, but flames lit the room and casted cruel, twisted shapes of guns and death on the walls. Akemi hadn’t slept peacefully in a long time. 

She knew the night well, but tonight, there was something new, almost silent and unnoticeable except for its familiarity. She recognized it as she could have recognized Taigen out of the corner of her eye or with the smallest gesture. 

That samurai was in her room. 

“Mizu.” She said, and then there was silence. Akemi lit the candle beside her and saw him jump down from the rafters and land at the foot of her bed. 

“You could die for this,” Akemi said. 

Mizu didn’t respond. “I need your help.” 

Akemi scoffed. “I will help you as you helped me with my father’s men.” 

“I rescued you, didn’t I? You can hardly blame me now for your shackles. Ending up here was due to your own foolish actions.”

“No. I choose to stay.”

There was a flash of respect in Mizu’s eyes. “I’m sorry,” he said. Akemi blinked. “If you help me, I can make amends. A fleet of white men is coming for Japan. They carry weapons and drugs, and they are worse than Abijah Fowler. In two months, they will arrive. I need your help to warn the shogun.”

“Wait here.”

Mizu hid in the shadows as Akemi dispatched a messenger to her allies. When she returned to bed, it was with a pot of tea. She poured two cups. 

“You must meet with the shogun tomorrow. He will listen to you if I back you.”

“No. I must find the next white man I am sworn to kill.”

Akemi abruptly put down the tea. “You will stay,” she said in a commanding, fierce voice. “If you don’t, I’ll send men after you. To make amends, you must act like a samurai this time—with honour.”

Mizu looked away. “Fine. But I can’t stay long.”

Akemi was startled. She had expected Mizu to be selfish and arrogant, and run off to who knows where, but he was different tonight. 

“Take some tea,” she said. “It’s cold.”

“Is it drugged like last time?” Mizu said dryly. “Are you going to knock me unconscious and keep me in a cell?”

“Don’t tempt me,” Akemi said, taking a sip, and he laughed. In the candlelight, Mizu’s hard face looked softer. She wondered what he was like before the sword. Had he always been so angry?

“What was your plan, that night?” Mizu asked. There was still a hint of mockery in his eyes. “The drug wouldn’t have worked too quickly. What if I had asked for your services?”

Akemi hadn’t thought about that. Suddenly, she remembered Kyoto, remembered seeing him outside the bars of her palanquin. She had wanted to know him. She still did. 

She was all too aware now that she was in bed and Mizu, infuriating and beautiful, was close enough to touch. She felt something like longing. But Akemi, well practiced at hiding her feelings, showed nothing on her face.

“I would have seduced you.” 

“Really?” Mizu smirked. “Taigen might be easy, but I’m not.”

Akemi cocked an eyebrow. “Are you sure?” She reached over and adjusted his haori, her hands lingering on his chest.

“I’m extremely sure,” he said, but he didn’t move away. Akemi wanted to call his bluff. She wanted to throw him off balance. Her hands slid up to his shoulders, to his hair. His mouth parted for the smallest moment before he narrowed his eyes and pushed her away. 

He stood up. “I won’t fall for your tricks. I didn’t at Madame Kaji’s, and I won’t now.”

“I won’t fall for yours, either,” she said. They stared at each other for a moment, each trying to read the other and failing. She wondered what he was looking for and why that should matter to her. 

Mizu blew out the candle. “I will come back at sunrise and stay for one day,” he said, before vanishing into the night. She wasn’t sure who had won, but a new ember started to burn within her. 

#blue eye samurai #mizu #akemi #mizu x akemi

[heavenlyhoundoom]

Sun and Moon show incorrect quotes 3.

1.Ruin: I like wearing oversized sweaters. Not just because they're extremely comfy and cuddly, but because whenever the sleeves are really big, I get to flop them around and smack people.

2.Lunar: When I was your age- Bloodmoon, mocking Lunar: When I was your height. Lunar: Lunar: Listen here you little shit-

3.Bloodmoon, to Moon: How do you tell someone politely you want to hit them with a brick?

4.Bloodmoon rushes by with an armful of water bottles Sun: What's going on? Moon: Bloodmoon wouldn't drink water. Sun: …And? Moon: And I asked them how fast they could chug an entire bottle. Bloodmoon, loudly: 16 OUNCES IN TEN SECONDS, BITCHES!

5.Moon, texting: Ruin, will you please go to sleep? Ruin, texting back: What makes you think you didn’t just wake me up? Eclipse, yelling: I CAN HEAR YOU CLAPPING TO THE FRIENDS THEME EVERY TWENTY MINUTES SHUT THE FUCK UP AND GO THE FUCK TO SLEEP! Moon, texting: Just a hunch :) You goin’ to sleep soon? Ruin, texting: I’m trying Eclipse, yelling again: TRY HARDER I HAVE A 5:45 AM MEETING TOMORROW BITCH Moon, texting: Okay, don’t stay up too late or you’ll be cranky :)

6.Eclipse: According to the footage here, you shook the vending machine and when the shake alarm went off, you punched the glass and broke it. Bloodmoon: …I was hungry.

7.Sun, texting Moon: Moon! Help I'm being kidnapped! Moon: Where are you? Sun: I'm with some strange person. In a car. Help. Moon: I'll call Earth. Earth, answering their cell: Y'ello? Moon: Where's Sun? They texted me that they were being kidnapped. Earth: Sun? Whaddya mean, he's right next to me- Earth: Earth: I'll call you back. Hangs up Earth: THE NEW HAIRCUT ISN'T THAT BAD! Sun: WHO ARE YOU!?

9.Eclipse: Did you buy eggs like I asked? Lunar: Even better! Eclipse: What the fuck did you- Lunar: holding up a chicken Her name is Fluffy.

10.Bloodmoon: Onion rings are vegetable donuts. Eclipse, used to Bloodmoon being dumb: Sure… Bloodmoon: Your stomach thinks all potatoes are mashed. Eclipse: Okay? Bloodmoon: Lasagna is spaghetti flavored cake. Eclipse: Bloodmoon: Lobsters are mermaid scorpio- Eclipse: Jesus, that one is a little- Ruin, interested: No, no, Bloodmoon, keep going.

11.Bloodmoon, grinning: I have a knife! Earth: Put it down, Bloodmoon. Bloodmoon: Make me! sprints away

12.Monty: Oh, to be a bored heir to the throne who keeps rejecting marriage proposals due to being secretly in love with the cute gardener. Earth: Oh, to be a cute gardener who secretly places roses in the heir’s room because she is in love with him. Bloodmoon: Oh, to be the palace guard who discreetly helps to boost the cute gardener up the wall for her secret deliveries in the middle of the night. Lunar: Oh, to be the heir’s best friend witnessing the two fools dance around each other while knowing damn well that the two like each other. Chica: Oh, to be the noble suitor from another royal family who comes to know of their love instantly and plans an entire plan to get them their happy ending. Ruin: Oh, to be a medieval peasant who knows nothing about the heir’s personal life and who dies of dysentery at age 23.

13.Earth: Regular soda is too sweet!

Bloodmoon: Diet soda has a weird after taste!

Earth: No! Ugh, oh my god. Diet soda is THE BEST! It doesn’t have sugar! It’s SPICY!

Bloodmoon: It has other weird stuff in it! I’ll take REGULAR sugar in my REGULAR soda!

Earth: It’s SO SWEET like it’s a dessert though! Diet feels more like a drink!

Bloodmoon: I’m going to physically attack you.

Earth: Which is better, Ruin?

Ruin: Oh, I usually drink water!

Bloodmoon: Wha- NO!

Earth: DISGUSTING!

14.Sun, hungover: Please tell me I'm imagining that I claimed I was king of the ducks. Moon: I would, but then I would be lying to the King of All Ducks.

15.Eclipse: How would you guys deal with a toxic friend? Earth: Tell them how you really feel. Sun: Slowly distance yourself from them. Bloodmoon: Engage in a 1v1 sword battle and if they lose they have to stop being toxic or pay the price. Eclipse, being handed a sword: …well heck.

16.Moon: Can I offer you a nice stick in this trying time?

17.Bloodmoon and Ruin texting Bloodmoon: Come downstairs and talk to me please. I'm lonely. Ruin: Isn't Eclipse there? Bloodmoon: Yes but I like you more.

18.Eclipse: They… well, I wouldn't call it inheritance per se. What do you call it when you kill someone and get their stuff? Lunar: Um, murder??? Ruin: Adventuring! Bloodmoon: Tuesday.

19.Eclipse: I swear to god I'm the only one here with a braincell. Lunar, Sun, Earth, and Bloodmoon: ALL HAIL the keeper of the sacred braincell!

20.Sun: Christmas lights? Moon: Check. Lunar: Thermos of hot cocoa? Moon: Check. Earth: Santa suits? Moon: Check. Eclipse: Shovel? Moon: Check. Bloodmoon: Alibi and bail money? Moon: Check- wait, WHAT?!

#Fnaf #glamrock chica #montgomery gator #sundrop #moondrop #sun and moon show #sams lunar #sams eclipse #sams earth #sams bloodmoon #sams ruin #incorrect quotes

[daddy-deathslinger]

Hey, I'm a big sucker for DBD imagines and posts and you're one of the top three I like.

Is it ok if I can have some imagines of Caleb, Kazan, and Trickster reacting to an s/o who LOUDLY curses in their native tongue (Like Caleb = Irish S/O, Kazan = Japenese S/O) and they let it out during a trial with them, shocking even the crows.

I rage around failing gens and evading, and I always cause a scene when I do 😅. You don't have to find any accurate swear words or curses, I like to see the build up to their reactions for it XD!

Hi there! I hope ya like what I came up with, I wanted to try and google some swears in these languages so if something's incorrect, blame google! xD

The Deathslinger/Caleb Quinn reacting to his S/O cursing in Irish:

It’s a trial like any other for you. Repair generators, flee from the killer, yadda yadda.

The killer in this trial is Caleb, so you know he’s gonna go a bit easier on you, which is good because you feel distracted this trial.

It might be the map, you hate the creepy school of Silent Hill. Nothing ever seems to go right when you’re sent to this map.

To prove your point, you suddenly get very startled while sneaking up to a generator.

BANG! It’s a corpse, it just falls right out of a locker! Right in front of you, as you’re sneaking by!

You can’t help it, the words just come out.

“Nách mór an diabhal thú! Fucking manky piece of-”

“Y/N?”

The next second, you’re startled again, this time by none other than Caleb, sneaking up behind you.

“Caleb! What in the goddamn-”

Your curses are cut short when you see the confused look on Caleb’s face. 

He just stares at you, and you’re starting to wonder if he’s alright.

Then, he suddenly burst out into laughter.

He laughs and laughs, folding himself double where he stands, tears forming in his eyes.

“Yeah yeah, laugh it up. This thing scared me, alright?” you hiss, but Caleb only continues laughing as he leaves the room.

The Oni/Kazan Yamaoka reacting to his S/O cursing in Japanese:

You and Meg find each other in a trial. You decide to sneak up to a generator together, since you make a notoriously good engineer team.

The wet bamboo rustles beside you as you sit down at your silent generator, and as Meg keeps watch at first, you start working the cables.

This is easy. You know your way around generators, you’ve repaired hundreds of them by now.

Even though Kazan is the killer in this trial, you’re not nervous. He goes easy on you, and you’re not worried about Meg and her speedy legs.

Meg is still keeping watch just in case Kazan shows up, and you’re almost halfway on the generator. This is too easy, why-

BOOM!

A part of the generator explodes right in your face, and the next second all hell breaks loose.

“Kuso kurae! Motherfucker! This stupid piece of shit generator!”

You go on and on about where the generator can get lost and you don’t even notice Meg staring at you like she could kill you.

You do notice the heavy footsteps approaching, however. You go silent, just now noticing the echo from your angered voice.

Kazan looks at you, just staring from behind his mask.

Then, he grabs his sword and slowly saunters along, as if nothing had happened. You hear him mutter something to himself, then he’s gone.

The Trickster/Ji-Woon Hak reacting to his S/O cursing in Korean:

It’s just one of those days. Nothing goes right, and every possible thing fucks up.

You’re so tired of this trial, even if your Ji-Woon is the killer.

You wish this would just end already. You break every part in the generators, you can’t sneak or hide for shit apparently and on top of everything Quentin is just aimlessly staring at the wall whenever you come across him in the trial. He must be falling asleep again, stupid guy.

The cup finally spills over for you, when Ji-Woon finds you and decides to taunt you a bit.

He brandishes his knives, singing about how easy you are to catch and how useless your teammates are in this trial. It’s like a whole performance.

You sigh in anger and suddenly you shout: “Gae-sae-kki! Shut up, you idiot!”

Ji-Woon quiets down and stops in the middle of a tap dance, staring at you.

“Babe, I’m sorry, I love you”, you say. “Just, shut up! And you look stupid, dancing like that!”

A moment of silence, then Ji-Woon grins at you.

To your surprise, he leans over and kisses your cheek, then he giggles and starts walking towards Quentin, who’s now clearly asleep.

#dead by daylight #dbd #the deathslinger #caleb quinn #dbd deathslinger #the oni dbd #the trickster dbd #kazan yamaoka #ji woon hak #the deathslinger x reader #dbd meme #the oni x reader #the trickster #the trickster x reader