#incorrect prequel triology
Anakin: I’m capable of babysitting
Padme: Don’t call it babysitting, they’re your children. It’s called parenting
Anakin: What’s the difference?
Padme: You don’t get paid
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Padme: Quick question, where are the kids right now?
Anakin: They’re upstairs
Padme: They’re at daycare
Anakin: They’re at daycare?
Padme: They’re upstairs!!
Anakin: Why are you messing with me?
[Later that day]
Obi-wan: Where are the kids?
Anakin: I thought they were with you
Obi-wan, panicking: What? No!
Anakin: I’m kidding. They’re at daycare. Ha!
Obi-wan: What about me makes you think my heart can handle that joke???
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Anakin: There’s something out here.
Padme: Just trap it under a cup and I’ll be there in a minute.
Anakin: I’ll try but it’s Obi-Wan.
Padme: What?? What is he doing here?
Anakin: I told you if we left the tea on the counter, we’d attract something
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Anakin: Hey, do you think I could fit fifteen marshmallows in my mouth?
Obi-wan: You‘re a hazard to society.
Ahsoka: And a coward. Do twenty.
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Dooku: We have your child.
Obi-wan: I don‘t have a child..?
Dooku: Then who just asked us for warm milk and made us cut the crusts off their sandwich?
Obi-wan: Oh force, you have Anakin.
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Padme: Two years ago today, I married my best friend.
Padme: Ani is still angry about that, but me and Sabe were drunk and thought it was funny.
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Obi-wan: Don’t change the subject
Satine: What’s the subject?
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Obi-Wan: Try not to kill anyone on accident while I’m gone
Anakin: I’m not an idiot, Master. I know how to kill people on purpose
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Sabe: And Anakin’s your best friend, I’m sure he’ll come to his senses and pick you.
Obi-Wan: He’s not my best friend, we’re not 12. If he wants Kitster to be his best man, I really don’t care.
Sabe: Sounds like you care
Obi-Wan: No, I mean it’s just annoying. We talk every day, we see each other all the time, he’s always there for me and basically-
Obi-Wan: Oh my God, Anakin’s my best friend.
Sabe: You okay?
Obi-Wan: No, my best friend didn’t ask me to be his best man. I’m pissed!
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Anakin: if someone gave you $200 because "you're ugly" would you take it?
Obi-Wan: I’m not gonna turn down $200 because someone else has bad eyesight
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Anakin: Oh, so when crows remember people who wronged them it’s 'intelligent' and 'really cool'.
Anakin: but when I do it I’m 'petty' and 'need to let it go'.
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Obi-Wan: I miss Satine
Anakin: well, you still have me
Obi-wan: it’s not the same. I can talk to Satine about things that I can't talk to you about.
Anakin: like what?
Obi-Wan: the annoying things that you do.
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Anakin: Wow Angel, that's really embarrassing.
Padme: You run a fan blog about me so you don't get to talk.
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Anakin: Pretty slim pickings at the drugstore. All I got was, uh, Sith me Once: The Unauthorized Sheev Palpatine Story. Anyway, I got all your stuff: your bandages, your hydrogen peroxide, your shuura fruits-
Padme: You’re making too big a fuss out of this. Ani, I mean, I‘ve had much worse. This is just a bruised toe
Anakin: It’s your index toe. Very serious. That’s the toe you point with.
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So I started reading Clone Wars Wild Space, which is legends, but still
Also Spoiler warning if u don’t like spoilers and plan on reading it c:
For context: Obi-Wan asked Padme to end her relationship with Anakin, after Geonosis and she played along, because she refused to end it but didn’t want obi wan to know that.
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Anakin: You know what I’m thinking about, Padme?
Padme: What, Ani?
Anakin: That when you stand up, there’s gonna be, like, a perfect imprint of your butt in the sand.
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