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#incorrect legolas quotes
elvish-sky · 13 hours ago
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Legolas: How did you sleep last night?
Aragorn: I got a solid eight minutes. Not consecutively, but still. It’s fine. You’re not even that blurry!
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Conversation
Boromir: So, did everyone learn their lesson?
Legolas: No.
Gimli: I did not.
Pippin: I may have actually forgotten one.
Merry: Also no.
Boromir: Oh good, neither did I.
Aragorn: *Exhausted sigh*
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Meeting New People
Legolas: I’m a very nice person.
Gimli: no you’re not.
Legolas: I’m a nice person.
Gimli: try again.
Legolas: I’m a person.
Gimli: debatable
Legolas: I’m tall
Gimli: better
Legolas: he’s the nice one, I’m the tall one
Gimli: very good
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incorrectlegolas · a day ago
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Legolas: *bursts into room*
Aragorn: What did you do this time?
Legolas: You’ll have a hard time believing this because it never happens, but I made a mistake.
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incorrectlegolas · a day ago
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Legolas Annoying Aragorn
Part One:
Legolas: *jumps through Aragorn’s bedroom window*
Legolas, singing to the tune of Amazing Grace: Oh Aragorn
Legolas: Son of Arathorn
Legolas: Such a dumbass Aragorn
Legolas: Who saved an amazing elf like-
Aragorn, trying to sleep: Shut the fuck up
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elvish-sky · a day ago
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Aragorn, walking into the kitchen: Is something burning?
Legolas, leaning seductively against the counter to block Aragorn’s view: Just my desire for you.
Aragorn: Legolas, the toaster is on fire.
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Aragorn: You bought a taco?
Gimli: Yes.
Aragorn: From the truck that hit Legolas?
Gimli: Well me starving ain't gonna help him.
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elvish-sky · 2 days ago
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Aragorn: You lost a lot of blood and passed out. Do you remember anything?
Merry: Only the ambulance ride to the hospital.
Legolas: That wasn’t an ambulance. I drove you.
Merry: But I heard a siren.
Aragorn: That was Boromir.
Boromir: I was WORRIED.
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entishramblings · 2 days ago
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Legolas: Hey Aragorn!
Aragorn: Yes?
Legolas: Can a person breathe inside a washing machine while it’s on?
Aragorn: ...
Aragorn: Where’s Gimli?!
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Conversation
Gimli: If you think about it, "It's Raining Men" and "Let the Bodies Hit the Floor" could be about the same event but from different perspectives.
Aragorn: Gimli, I'm begging you to stop--
Legolas: Let him finish.
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entishramblings · 3 days ago
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Gimli: Have you ever heard of the word ‘sorry’?
Legolas: No, is that another word you made up?
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Conversation
Arwen: You don't think I can fight because I'm a girl.
Aragorn: No, I don't think you can fight because you're wearing a huge wedding dress. For what it's worth, I don't think Legolas could fight in that dress either.
Legolas: Perhaps not, but I would make a radiant bride.
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meteors-lotr · 3 days ago
Conversation
Tilda: What are you talking about? I'm like the backbone of this family!
Sigrid: You're like the appendix of this family. No one knows what you're here for.
Legolas: Also prone to explode at any given moment.
Tilda: Fuck you guys
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269-million · 4 days ago
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Legolas: There lie the woods of Lothlorien! That is the fairest of all the dwellings of my people. There are no trees like the trees of that land. For in the -
Pippin: Wait, wait! How does that work? So if there are no trees like them, does that mean they are not like themselves, either?
Legolas: ...
Pippin: [Later, pulling arrows out of his arm] Who knew even from three feet they could hurt so much?
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elvish-sky · 4 days ago
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Pippin, trying to cheer on the Fellowship: Two! Four! Six! Eight! Who-
Legolas, interrupting: Should I annihilate!
Pippin: *horrified gasp*
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gamgeesgarden · 5 days ago
Conversation
Gimli: *struggling to retrieve an item from the top shelf*
Legolas: Do you need me to get it for you?
Gimli: *gasps*
Gimli: HOW DARE YOU INSULT THE VERTICALLY CHALLENGED!
Legolas, laughing: Okay then...
[moments later]
Gimli: *defeated sigh*
Gimli: Help me.
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anironnn · 5 days ago
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*In Fangorn*
Legolas: The elves began it. Waking up the trees, teaching them to speak.
Gimli, shivering: WHY THE F*** DID YOU HAVE TO DO THAT
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